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#sorry if i don't respond to any messages i promise i'll read them all at some point
lmaonade · 2 years
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hi guys
been dreading this post. yesterday, may 3rd, i had my cat ditters put to sleep. he was my best friend, and always will be. he lived a very long 17 years, and went peacefully. you guys have shown me a lot of support with his vet visits, so i thought people should know. i know he was loved even by strangers who never met him.
he was a happy cat, and was well taken care of, and maybe a little too well fed. there's not much to say other than that i will miss him dearly and that i loved him so much.
i gave him lots of love and his favorite treats beforehand. rest well buddy
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sourbinnie · 9 months
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☆ regrets & replacements ☆
♡ genre ¿? ♡ -> angstttt (is all i know how to do) ♡ pair ¿? ♡ -> hyung line!skz x gn!reader ♡ plot ¿? ♡ -> did he actually forget? or did someone make him forget? ♡ warnings ¿? ♡ -> swearing ♡ request ¿? ♡ -> yes!
a/n -> i'm gonna use the same name for the girl best friend and it's soohee, i'm sorry if that's your name babes. to the person who sent me this request, babe i'll try making a happy ending i promise (even if this is just so sad lmaooo)
maknae line
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chan ✉
it wasn't weird to you that he wasn't the first person to say "happy birthday" to you that morning. he had always been busy especially in comeback season, you weren't mad, just a bit disappointed. the messages started flooding in as you looked at your phone trying to respond to everything. as the hours passed and no chan messages, no appearances at your front door and definitely no calls, you were starting to feel a bit uneasy.
you thought maybe he was planning a surprise? maybe you had to be more patient. or maybe he actually forgot and you were just waiting for nothing. either way the thoughts left your head as soon as you heard the phone ring and it was a video call from minho.
"happy birthday (y/n)!" the boys cheered and they even had a cake with them. it made you feel ten times better knowing they cared so much but it still made you wanna cry not seeing chan there, it just felt wrong. "i'm sorry we couldn't say this earlier, we were busy with practice and i'm sure your boyfriend will be there at any minute." minho said.
"i hope so, he still hasn't said anything." you responded and they all looked confused as hell. chan had been wanting everything to be perfect for your birthday day and him not saying anything was kinda weird to all of them. "did he say anything to you guys?"
"he left earlier because he said he got plans? i thought he would be right there when we called." felix said and now it was your turn to be confused. so if he wasn't here and he said he got plans? where was he? it just didn't make sense. 
"i'm gonna text him right now to get his ass to your house." jisung said as he brought out his phone and texted as fast as he could. you could read the look on his face through the screen as he read the reply and it wasn't pleasing at all. "he's with soohee." jisung said and it was like everything stopped for a moment. 
"you're not serious right now." seungmin said and you couldn't hear the boys go off anymore because it was now starting to make sense. you were never really good friends with soohee, you tried to but it was like she had another image for who she wanted to be with chan (probably herself). you decided to hang up because you couldn't really talk anymore, you were just shocked that she would go that low and that he would not care enough. 
you wanted to go out and enjoy the rest of your birthday but it's like you were glued to the couch as the hours went by and eventually chan did get home. he looked at you and took in the scene, he wasn't sure what happened that you didn't text him all day like you usually do or that you didn't come by during practice. something had to be wrong for you to be acting like this right?
"baby? what's wrong? i missed you today." he said as he tried to sit down next to you but you got up and now he was starting to understand that he was the one who did you wrong. he still didn't know why though and the vague messages from the boys today weren't helping. he felt like he wasn't in on whatever was going on and it was starting to make him panic. "did i do something wrong? i have no idea what's happening."
"can i be alone today chris? i'm just not feeling too well." you expressed and that made him worry even more. you usually would talk it out if something like this happened but you were more silent than anything. you headed towards your shared room leaving a puzzled chan behind. that's when something popped up on his phone saying "(y/n)'s birthday, don't forget to pick up all the things you ordered!" and it fucking broke him completely. 
not only he didn't say happy birthday to you, not only he forgot to pick up all the gifts, not only did he not organize everything he had planned for today. he spent the whole day with a person he knew you weren't fond of and not with you who had waited all day for him to do something. if he wasn't the worst boyfriend in the planet right now, he surely didn't know who it was. 
minho ✉
it was no secret to you that minho forgot. you weren't really bothered by it since you weren't used to celebrating your birthday all that often but it made you kind of excited to do so this year. jisung decided to join you in organizing the event and when the day arrived, he said everything was set in place and of course told you happy birthday before anyone could do so.
"is minho hyung with you?" jisung asked over the phone as you tried to get ready. that question caught you off guard as you thought he told you he was going to be at the dorms. 
"he's not in the dorms?" you asked now feeling a bit troubled and hoping for the answer you knew wouldn't arrive because if he was at the dorms, jisung wouldn't have asked in the first place.
"i was sure that he told me he would be at your house before the party." he responded but as you looked around, yeah minho wasn't anywhere to be found and now you were wondering if he would show up at all. anxiety kicked in and that was not pleasant to feel on your special day. "okay i can feel you panicking through the phone already, he might be my best friend but i'm kicking his ass for lying."
jisung hanged up all of the sudden and you tried to concentrate on your look. you knew everyone was gonna be there so you wanted to make a good impression but all that was going through your mind was "why would minho lie?" and "where was minho?". it troubled you so much that you had to call him to know what was going on. 
"(y/n)? babe? i'm kinda busy right now." hearing his voice relieved you but you were still going back and forth in your head trying to figure out. maybe he was gonna surprise you? maybe he did really forget? or maybe he just didn't care? oh god all those questions.
"minho where are you?" you asked and waited for the dreaded response, you were already assuming the worst and you were right to do so when he responded.
"i'm at soohee's house. she had a bad date with a guy and she needed me here." he said as if it was all natural like he wasn't missing out on anything and that made you want to cry on the spot but you held back. it wasn't that he chose you over her, it was that she did this all the time and he wasn't realizing how she was using him. you wanted him to be here, to show you that he cared but his actions were speaking louder than anything.
"minho do me a favor and don't show up today." you said as you hung up, leaving a baffled minho on the other side of the line. what were you talking about? okay yes he lied about seeing his friend but it was because neither you or jisung liked her at all. he was just trying to be a good friend and he ended up being a bad one and also a terrible boyfriend in the process, how did that make any sense?
"who called?" soohee asked as she came back from getting all her makeup off after a long crying session. 
"oh it was (y/n), they were pissed at me though and i have no idea why." he explained and that only made her chuckle which had him confused. what was funny about his significant other being mad at him? yeah there was nothing funny about it.
"probably because their dumb birthday party was today." she responded and it hit him like a bucket of cold water. he looked at the calendar on his phone and he wanted to actually punch a wall. he forgot his partner's birthday, he lied in the process and he chose someone else who was now showing her true colors before him over you. how the fuck would he make it up to you now?
changbin ✉
you were trying to process what was going on as you woke up and had a ton of messages but there was no changbin beside you. it was weird also how all of the texts you were getting started with "happy birthday" but the one changbin sent only said "i'm gonna be busy today, sorry that i left without a goodbye!" and it was okay, you didn't expect him to remember everything especially when he was buried with work. 
well you thought it was work at least. you didn't expect it to be something else but every single one of the boys had told you to have a wonderful day and that they were sure changbin was gonna enjoy his day off with you. so it wasn't work and now you were left to think about the endless possibilities of where he could be.
"he left without a word?" yeonjun asked as he and wooyoung dropped by. they were some of changbin's closest friends but easily became yours as well as you hung out often with them. "but he told us he had big plans for today! where the fuck could he be?"
"i have no idea. i thought the boys would know but they even told me he asked for a day off to spend it with me." you said and you started to feel a little troubled. maybe something happened? he would tell you if something was happening though especially if it was an emergency.
"let's hope he's just planning the surprise." wooyoung said and you were hoping for that, that it was all just one big confusion and he didn't forget about you. you felt incredibly lonely when they left but they had hope that his friend would appear again and that "busy" meant he was gonna show up with a million flowers to make it up to you. 
but time was passing by and no changbin appeared until midnight. he didn't expect for you to be awake at such an hour but he didn't question it as he looked at you, dry tears in your face as you sniffled. worry washed over his body as he sat down next to you and tried to get close but you wouldn't let him.
"darling? what happened?" changbin asked, feeling the tension all of the sudden. he wasn't gonna be a coward and run away from it though, if you were feeling down it was his duty to know what happened.
"wooyoung and yeonjun were here thinking that you might show up with gifts or a reservation. i thought the same for a minute but then you never showed up." you said choking on your tears and it made his heart break into pieces as he processed what was happening. his friends showed up, his bandmates probably said something too, hell even his family told him to not forget about today and what did he do? not remember his significant other's special day.
"i'm sorry (y/n). i spent all day with soohee because she needed me and i forgot to even look at the date, i had everything planned. i'm such a fucking idiot but let me make it up to you." he tried explaining but it was no use as you got up as your sobs got louder and everything he said was only making it worse. he knew that beyond you not having a good relationship with her that he chose her over you on a date that was important and that he was now too late.
"so not only did you forget. you chose to spend it with a person who clearly hates me and everything about our relationship. i think that says more about you than me, changbin." you said as you shook your head and walked to your shared room, only to close the door in the process startling him. he feared that this would be the end because there was no going back from this one.
hyunjin ✉
you knew something was off when hyunjin basically went silent mode. he left the house in the morning, not a trace of a goodbye kiss and less of a happy birthday. he didn't answer his phone calls and neither the texts messages that you were sending which was very odd on his part. he usually would spam you images or emojis but there was no sight of him.
you asked chan if hyunjin happened to be at the studio and he responded back immediately saying that he was supposed to be there for practice and still hasn't showed up. which okay you could understand him working on your birthday, you weren't insane like that but he usually got there on time. you decided to grab your things and head to the jyp building, you wanted to see him mostly. maybe he had forgotten your birthday and that was okay, you still had the rest of the day to celebrate it.
everyone as soon as they saw you said "happy birthday" or greeted you which was very nice. when you saw the boys you couldn't help but smile even if deep down inside you were freaking out. you could tell the vibe was off as well as you saw chan on his phone but you weren't shook out of your thoughts as felix talked to you.
"you shouldn't have to spend your birthday at a filthy dance studio with us. you should be celebrating!" he said as he hugged you and you returned the hug. maybe you did need this embrace after all because you were feeling a little down as hyunjin still didn't arrive.
"i just wanted to see him lix. i'm kinda worried but i'm hoping for the best." you mumbled and he nodded as he understood how you were feeling and why you weren't acting like yourself.
"he says he's coming over here, thank god." chan said and that made you smile a little but then remembered he did not pick up any of your calls yet he picked up when chan called him. maybe he was busy before? well he could've still responded to you a bit later right?
you sat down next to seungmin as he saw how you were feeling and wanted to distract you from it. it was working until everyone saw hyunjin walk in with soohee and that was the answer to all your troubles even if it brought a storm towards you and what was going to happen.
"baby? what are you doing here?" he asked with a confused look on his face and could immediately pick up the tension in the room as the boys were glaring at him and you just looked so sad. 
"oh god are you seriously looking like that because he didn't say happy birthday? how old are you?" soohee spoke and hyunjin closed his eyes as he let it sink in. he knew you two weren't in terms and this only made it worse didn't it? he left without a trace, he didn't respond to anything on his phone and he was now walking in with her as she spoke to you in such a hateful way. 
"i'm just gonna go. i'm sorry for interrupting the practice guys and hyunjin, please don't come by my apartment." you said as the tears rolled down your face and you left as fast as you could. hyunjin wanted to go after you but felix stopped him because you needed to be alone for now to heal. the knot in his throat getting tighter as he thought about how he would redeem this after he fucked up so badly.
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haziwritesstuff · 2 months
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the happiest girl
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But tonight, I'll be the happiest girl in the world. You'll see like it never happened.
Modern! Aemond x reader Wordcount | 1.8k Warnings | Aegon's a cheating bastard, sadness, mostly fluff.
Aegon took nothing in life serious. And your relationship with him… Was just one of those things. You loved him and you believed he loved you, to some degree at least. He just happens to love himself and his own needs more.
You were staring at the message you received on Instagram from some girl. She was claiming that she had a relationship with him. Part of you wanted to scold her but you decided against it. You always had some suspicion about it, he came home a lot later, he didn’t look at you the way he used to. Somewhere, somehow you saw it coming. But it still hurts. It feels like your heart was shattered in a million pieces and there was no one to pick them up. The apartment you shared with him did not feel the same anymore. What once was a place of happiness and comfort, is now a place of dread. Because that is what you felt right now, you dread to see him. But you had to know. Time was ticking by slowly as you were waiting for him to come home.
Finally you heard him stumble in. He wasn’t aware of anything… It was like every other day, but this one was different. You could feel a sense of foreboding, almost as if you expected it to happen, but it still hit you like a wave of bitter salt water.
As if you were drowning, struggling to keep your head above water. You saw him stumble in, drunk and unaware, yet you didn't feel rage or despair, just a deep sense of sadness and disappointment. He came towards you and sat down on the couch, still not aware that you were aware of his affair. "Hi there love," He tried to kiss you. "Don't." Your voice was cold as ice, and a chill ran through your body. He looked at you with a drunken grin and giggled. "Come on girl, it's just a little bit of fun. Lighten up!" "Aegon I know about her." Aegon's face went blank. He sat up straight and looked at you with a cold and emotionless gaze. "Her? What are you talking about?" "The woman you've been sleeping with. I've seen the messages. Don't give me any bullshit right now, I know the truth, and you know it too." Aegon swallowed – you were not supposed to find out. "I expected more from you. I thought you were better than this. But you're obviously just a coward who can't even keep his pants on. How could you do this to me, to our relationship? I trusted you and you broke it. You know what? I can't stand the sight of you right now. I'm going out. Don't expect me back."
It was cold outside, but the cold air felt refreshing after the suffocating atmosphere inside the apartment. You walked to the nearest bus stop, your tears streaming down your cheeks. You felt heartbroken and angry, and you didn't know where to go or who to turn to. All you wanted was to be held and consoled, to be taken care of and loved. But that seemed like an impossible dream, now more than ever. You wished you could turn back time and undo everything that had happened, but you knew that wasn't possible.
You suddenly felt your phone buzzing. Aegon sent you a text message, "Please come home. I want to talk. We can fix this." You read the text message and hesitated. On the one hand, you wanted to believe that he was really sorry and would change his ways. But on the other, you knew that deep down inside, he had been cheating on you for a very long time, so no matter what he said, nothing could really change that. And in all honesty you had nothing left to say. You sent him a text message back, "Don't contact me again. I'm not coming home. We're done." He responded with the usual, "I'm sorry, I promise I can change. Just give me another chance, I can't lose you. I will do anything for you."
"You're not the one who gets to cry." Tears started to fall again. You turned off your phone because you didn't want to hear any more of his excuses and lies. You stood at the bus stop, trying to calm yourself down, but all you could do was cry.
You wanted to have a drink to numb your pain and clear your head. You walked to a nearby bar and walked inside, taking a seat at the bar. You waited for the bartender to come over and order a glass of wine. “Put it on my tab.” A voice behind you spoke. Your eyes widened in surprise when you saw Aemond. You looked at him for a moment, surprised that he was here and that he was the one who offered to pay for your drink. "Aemond... What are you doing here?" He smiled at you, "I was just here having a drink with some friends when I saw you. I saw that you looked troubled, so I decided to come over and see if you're alright. I didn't think I'd see you here..." “Oh ehm… Aegon and I… We broke up…” Aemond's expression changed, becoming more empathetic. "I see... I'm so sorry to hear that. It must've been really hard for you. Do you need someone to talk to?" He didn't seem surprised, not at all. Aemond took a step closer to you and put his right arm around your back. You could feel the warmth of his body and it felt calming. He asked, "Can I tell you something?” You nod at him, you've always liked Aemond. He was different but in a good way.
He took a sip from his drink and looked at you. "I know we've been friends for a long time, but I can't lie to you. I've always had feelings for you. I know that's not something you probably want to hear right now, but I couldn't just keep it to myself. I understand though if you're not interested in me the same way, but if you will, let me comfort you, just this one time. You need someone right now, and I'd like to be the one you turn to."
You were speechless. Aemond continued, "I know it's unfair to confess my love for you in this situation, but I didn't want to miss this opportunity. I've always had a huge crush on you, and maybe this was the universe's way of letting us know that we needed each other. I know this may not be the right time for us to begin a relationship, but if you're open to that idea, I would be more than happy to be here for you and support you through this difficult time."
It took you a while to progress all of that information. You finally find the courage to speak up, "Aemond, it's really kind of you to say all of that. I can't say I'm not tempted to take you up on your offer, but I'm still a bit shocked by everything that happened. I'm just not sure if I'm ready for a relationship right now, but that doesn't mean I don't want to be cared for and consoled. Could... could we spend some time together, just for tonight?"
Aemond smiled warmly at you, "Absolutely. I totally understand that you're in a fragile state right now, and the most important thing is for you to heal and move on from this situation. I don't want to pressure you into anything you're not ready for. But I do want to be there for you and help you through this difficult time. Is it okay if I sit here with you for a little while? I promise I won't force any unwanted advances on you."
You suddenly realized that if you'd asked Aemond out, instead of allowing Aegon to charm you, everything would have been different. You would never have gone through the heartbreak and disappointment, and you would have had someone who truly loved and respected you all this time. The thought of what could've been started to make you feel a bit down, but Aemond's presence always had a comforting effect on you. You couldn't have asked for a better person to comfort you in this very moment.
"Tell me something funny, Aemond. I'm in desperate need of some laughter." "Hmm, something funny..." Aemond thought for a moment, and then he smiled and said, "What do you get when you cross a banana with an elephant?" "Oh god... I didn't think you'd actually try to tell me a joke!" "Well, I can't say I'm a professional comedian, but I thought it would help lighten the mood. So, what do you get when you cross a banana with an elephant?" You had such a hard time keeping yourself serious. Aemond wasn't a natural funny person but seeing him try this way... Made you feel a certain way. "Just wait for it..." Aemond looked at you with a smirk, enjoying making you laugh. "Okay, ready? Here's the punchline - you get an 'eleph-nana'!"
And for the first time in a while the tears coming from your eyes weren't from hurt or sadness, they were from laughter. The two of you sat at the bar for a while, laughing and joking and enjoying each other's company. After a while, Aemond gently placed his hand on your arm. "Would you mind if we left the bar and went somewhere more private?" Your eyes lit up when he private, "I'd love that."
You could feel the cool air on your face and you saw the stars in the sky, they were exceptionally bright tonight. Aemond took you by the hand and led you to a secluded spot, far from any noise or distractions. He stopped in front of you and looked into your eyes. "Can I ask you something?" "Yeah, you can ask me anything." "Can I kiss you?" You shouldn't want it but you wanted it so badly, you wanted him to make you feel again. “I… Yes.” You whispered. The moment you said that, Aemond quickly leaned forward and kissed you deeply. You could feel his lips against yours and the warmth of his body. It felt amazing, as if all the pain from before had just disappeared. His hands caressed your face and neck as you embraced one another. You were completely swept up in the moment, and there was nothing else besides the two of you. You could feel the rush of hormones and emotions, your heart was beating fast and your breathing was shallow. The feeling was almost overwhelming, but you wanted more. Aemond pulled you closer and his lips pressed against yours with more passion. Your hands ran through his hair and you held him tightly, as if you didn't want the kiss to ever end. Aemond broke the kiss, "Would you like to come to my apartment?" Your heart raced as you looked into his eyes and nodded your head, unable to speak.
But tonight, I’ll be the happiest girl in the world. You’ll see like it never happened.
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thetarotbestie · 2 months
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Hi bestie!
I’ve just got this month my first tarot deck and I’m trying to connect with them.
I’ve asked a ‘yes or no’ card and same time the card answer was no (it was the same card) but I asked if I could trust that message and if I need i to connect more with my deck and the answer were a no and a yes. And I know I asked that question a bit anxious, so then I said please can I know again if it’s a yes or a no and the answer was a yes, and when asking if I could trust that answer, it was a yes.
So after all this my questions are, because I’m new:
1. Can maybe the deck know I was anxious and scared of the answer and that’s why it was negative twice? Because I didn’t feel right with that answer. So, can the deck feel your anxiety towards an answer?
2. Should I trust more the second time with the yes or the first time? As you can see, I’m still a bit anxious because I asked if my 2024 was going to be good and such a negative answer at first scared me when I was anxious to know the answer. (It was the five of wands twice and when I asked it was the knight of wands)
3. Is it too soon to be doing future yes/no predictions when it’s the second time I use them?
Sorry for this long message but I didn’t know who to ask since tarot is taboo in my city and I’m starting and I’m a closer witch now.
Hope I haven’t bothered you! Sending much love for this year ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕
Hey, friend! It's been about 2-ish weeks since you sent this in, so I'm hoping this will help you, even if I'm only just now getting to it. Quick warning that I can only give you answers based off my personal knowledge and beliefs about tarot.
I do believe decks respond to our energy, but they are just tools. If you're anxious and scared, your energy absolutely can affect the cards you pull, but they are still the cards you pull. You're in control. That's why most readers take deep breaths and try to ground themselves before they pull any cards, to get those jitters and nervous feelings out of the way. I truly believe you should try to be in as neutral a state as possible when pulling cards (or doing any kind of spiritual work) because our emotions (how our spirit feels and acts) can absolutely affect spirit-based practices. It's like how if you don't sleep well or stretch before a big game, your body can't perform as well, get it?
I would settle a bit and pull again. Because the 5 of Wands can be negative, but it's not always. Yes, it can mean conflict and stress. It can also mean life pulling you in all directions, becoming busier, getting involved with a diverse group of people who might all want different things. It can mean sports or competition in some cases, neither of which are bad. If I were you, I would settle and draw clarifiers. If you're pulling for yourself, there's no need to stop at just one card if you're confused. Don't be afraid to ask you spiritual support team for help!
And this is the great thing about tarot: there are no rules. It's never too early to ask a question, in my opinion. I do think there are topics that might be outside of our depth as newbie readers, but that doesn't make them necessarily off-limits.
Feel free to ask me questions any time! I'll try to do better about looking through my inbox and answering non-readings faster (no promises though, my inbox is a warzone).
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fangirlandtheories · 2 years
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Today's been kind of rough day, so I decided, dear followers, to bother you all with it, because my heart is terribly heavy tonight and I really need a rant. I understand if it's something you don't want to read so if that's the case, scroll on.
I just sometimes feel like no one cares about anything that I care about. Goodness that feels like a silly feeling, especially when I'm gifted with people who dedicate time out of their days to send me such kind messages of love, but life outside the internet is and always has been a little different and a little more lonely for me. I'm the youngest of 4 so I always had an older sibling to play with or to keep an eye on me until I was about 9, then they were too big to want to play pretend or want to hang out with me so I'd just play alone. I didn't ever really realize that it was something that would follow me forever. I'm 23 now, not a 9 year old kid that's sad that no one wants to jump on the trampoline with, but that fear of rejection lingers so deeply. Whenever I get excited about things and people look at me like I'm insane, I feel stupid that I ever thought I could let someone else in to that part of myself, when it's just been me for the last 14 years. It's so fucking overwhelming sometimes. My sister came over tonight and I feel like every time she's over, if I even try to speak it's either ignored, dismissed, or spoken over. I'll say something like "Oh I had this one lady come in to work today-" and they will just start a conversation halfway through my sentence. No one even bats an eye, it's like it's normal to do it. Someone could say "How was work?" And I'll be like telling them a funny story and they'll just stare at their phones and nod with an occasional hum of acknowledgment but they don't actually listen, I know because I'll ask them something and they won't respond and I'll ask again and they'll be like "Oh sorry what? I was distracted" and nothing feels so soul crushing as getting through a story only to find that no one was listening, like nothing you say has any value. To find out that you're fucking background noise. Everyone looks at my interests as something funny or odd because they don't share them, to a point where I am protective about them. I came out as bisexual to my family this year, a secret for about 5 years but not one I expected to reveal so soon, and they were very supportive and I'm so lucky for that. I've been a fanfiction writer for 11 years and they have never known. I revealed my sexuality, not that it was something I was ashamed of, but it feels like a secret with more weight, before I ever revealed a hobby. I'm so scared that if they do find out, it'll be something for them to make fun of until the joy is gone. It's an escape but it's all I have. I know people in my life care about me, I really do, but sometimes it really hits me how overwhelmingly lonely I am sometimes. If you have read this far, that tells me that you either love to read this shit or you just enjoy my posts and are intrigued by this long ass post. If you hate it, please don't tell me. I hate it too. I already have thought of every criticism you could use, so save your breath and let me pretend this app is my diary for one fucking second between my stranger things reblogs. I'm okay, I promise, I just needed space to vent.
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lovesickmochi · 7 months
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Memory
re: Dear You. I logged into this account for the first time in a long time. I deleted the app on my phone, and completely logged out of it on my computer.
I know he posts on here every now and then, and for a while, I couldn't help but not look at anything he wrote about us. In hopes that it would help me move on after everything that had happened.
I read the letter he wrote to me.
It took me a while to process it, and also find the words to make an attempt at responding to him in the most mature way possible.
So, here it is.
A couple hours ago, I found out about a Bruno Major concert that's happening in a week at the Warfield in San Francisco. Listening to some of his albums, I remembered a cover a former friend of mine wrote here on Tumblr. He changed up the lyrics of Nothing - Bruno Major into something relating to how our friendship was at the time.
I was reading the cover a couple minutes ago, and it brought me back to who I used to be, who he used to be to me.
He said I used to be his sun and moon. He said I was the gold in between the seams of his life. He said I saved his life. The person he could go to for anything and everything. We were inseparable.
But... Why aren't I that person anymore?
There was a situation that occurred over a year ago, now. I'll take the blame for the most part, I know now that I was the problem in that whole thing. It's my fault that it became so much of a big deal. It's my fault that our friendship had to end.
I know better than to cover up my side of the story with lies, just to point out who the bad guy is. So in this, to you and her, I'm sorry.
I feel like a coward for not messaging this directly, but I hope this finds you in good health. I hope this message can come through as a truce, maybe as a notice that I'm ready to talk and try things again. That is, only if you want to reignite what was lost, or start over with a blank page. I have a pen to give to you, we can start writing a new story together. If not, that is okay. I don't want to force you to do anything you don't want to do. It's your path, your decision.
Every now and then, my Snapchat memories show me videos of us. Of our friendship, of our adventures. I would look at them and say to myself, "When is the next time we can have an adventure like this again?" But then I remember, it's not that simple anymore. I will admit that I haven't matured as much as you expected me to. There are some things in my life that I still have to fix, or make a move on, but I promise I'm getting better.
I've been in a relationship with someone for almost half a year now. And in all honesty, you're still one of the main people I want to introduce him to. Not for any judgement, but to express how much you both mean to me to a point where I can comfortably introduce you to each other.
I've also been on the look out for jobs. There's a restaurant that's hiring waitresses and hostesses for $24 an hour, so I might apply to that. In the meantime, after I get my first paycheck, I'm going to start working on my GED. I have to pay for four classes that I can easily do online, which isn't that bad really, it's like taking a unit test.
After receiving my GED, I'm going to pursue massage therapy. It's something I've been looking into for the past year or so, and I want to see where the studies can take me in the future.
Things have been pretty great, really. I'm starting to get a move on in my life, but I wanted to take a moment and think about you.
I miss you. I miss all of the talks we would have so late in the night, and all of the laughter and the crying, everything. If there's any way I can make it up to you, or make the chances of getting to know you again more likely, I'm ready for it. There's still so much love in my heart for you, and I'm willing to give things a second chance if you are too.
I love you. I hope you haven't forgotten that.
<3
Shelby
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mackenzielovee · 2 years
Text
ambivalence blurb: valentine's day - rafe cameron
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a/n: hi babies hopefully this went up smoothly, hope you enjoy it!! super cheesy and a little short, sorry about that. i promise i'll be back updating more frequently soon! leave me a comment, let me know what you think! xoxo
Warnings: swearing, sexual innuendoes, kissing
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"Okay, Wheezie, it's been four hours. I wore the wrong shoes," you complain, your words bouncing off the dressing room door you're attempting to yell through.
"Wait," she protests, a little too quickly for your liking. You furrow your eyebrows in suspicion as she whips open the door, wearing her own clothes. You glance at the ten hangars she'd brought in, all resting neatly on the wall. She hadn't touched one thing.
"What?" you ask her.
"There's just one more store I want to go to," she explains, "None of these fit."
The crease between your eyebrows deepens, "They're all the same size as the stuff you brought in before."
"Well, I don't like them," she tries again.
You sigh and shake your head, then usher her out of the dressing room.
"Come on," you say, "Let's hurry it up. I'm ready to go home."
She grabs the clothes from the hangar and passes you by, smirking over her shoulder as she walks up to hand the clothes to the dressing room attendant.
"You just want to see my brother," she teases.
You roll your eyes but don't say anything because you know she's right; you hadn't heard a peep from Rafe all day. Normally, when you're out and he's home, he's always texting you. You've texted him twice with updates on Wheezie's spending habits and seeing if he wants to go out to eat tonight, both of which have gone unanswered.
You check your phone again out of habit, glaring down at the empty screen. The time and the date laugh at you: 4:32 p.m. , Sunday, February 13th.
Wheezie leads you out of the store, hanging back for a second so you catch up to her, walking side by side in the mall.
"I think your brother is asleep," you grumble, checking your phone one last time before sliding it into your pocket.
Wheezie lets out an uneasy laugh, "You know Rafe. Always tired."
You glance at her out of the corner of your eye, watching her eyes dart around the stores in front of her. It almost seems as if she has no idea where she's actually headed, but attempting to make it up as the two of you walk.
You smirk, "Uh-huh. Are you going to tell me why you weren't really trying any of those clothes on in there?"
"I was just taking a texting break. You would have too, if Rafe was responding."
You shake your head and let out a scoff, pushing her shoulder lightly as she laughs. She spots a store off to your left and her eyes light up with something similar to relief.
"There!" she cheers, "Come on."
Forty-five minutes later, you're dragging Wheezie to the car and asking if she wants to get food on the way home. She shakes her head, checking her phone and then sighing in relief when she reads whatever text had just come through.
"What is it?" you ask, leaning over in attempt to read it.
"Nothing," she says, angling it back from you, "Just ready to go home."
"Ouch," you joke, but you couldn't agree more.
Your phone goes off a second later, and you ignore Wheezie snickering when you lunge for it. Feeling like a smoker getting their fix, you sigh in content when you see Rafe's name on the screen.
Sorry, baby. Just saw these. I'm at your house. Hurry and drop Wheeze off.
You glare at the message, no indication that he was napping and didn't mean to ignore you. You wonder what the hell he's doing at your house; probably yard work for your dad to try and kiss up.
If I come home to a freshly mowed lawn, Cameron...
Wheezie's waiting on you, so you prepare to lock your phone and start driving, but you stop when you already see the bubble that Rafe's typing. You shoot her a glance, but she's too wrapped up in her phone to notice.
Relax. I'm kicking Scott's ass in Madden.
Mowed the yard hours ago.
Hurry.
But drive safe. Love you.
You shake your head at him and then place your phone down in your lap, shifting the car into drive and setting off to the Cameron residence. Your stomach growls as you drive, and you ask Wheezie if she wants to drive-thru somewhere and get a bite to eat. She says no, very aggressively, and says that you should get home, using the excuse that she's sure Rafe ordered a pizza or something.
When you drop her off, she's quick to climb out of the car and offers up a have fun, and when you question her, her neck grows red. You frown when she laughs uneasily and then shuts the car door, hurrying inside with her phone already tucked against her ear.
Shaking your head, you drive home, wondering what the hell could be waiting for you there. You listen to Rafe's playlist on your way home as you daydream, getting more and more excited to see your boyfriend with every mile. With a quick glance at the clock, you realize it's been nearly twenty-four hours since you'd seen him. Yet, it felt like forever.
When you pull up in the driveway, you take note of how nice the yard looks. Not only had Rafe mowed, he'd laid fresh mulch around the plants and flowers, and also meticulously removed every single weed from every section. You know your father is thrilled, and you just shake your head at your sweet boyfriend so willing to do anything.
You pull open the front door and immediately take note of the silence, which makes you furrow your eyebrows. You thought you'd hear the TV, the boys laughing or arguing with each other, anything other than deafening silence.
"Scott?" you call out, then add, "Rafe?"
"Kitchen," Scott yells back.
You follow his voice, your purse hanging off your shoulder and your singular shopping bag dangling from your wrist. You expect Rafe to be in the kitchen as well, so you frown when you only see your brother. Scott his tucking his jacket on over his shirt when your eyes meet his.
"Hey," he greets, "I'm heading out. Mom and Dad are at the Club."
You just stare at him, expression blank. You peak into the living room, but Rafe's not there, either.
"Okay," you reply cautiously.
Scott chuckles, "Can't even chat for one second without worrying about him, huh?"
Your frown only deepens as you take a step toward him to see if he's genuinely offended, but he looks down at the counter to pick up his keys and phone.
"Scott-"
"Joking, Y/N," he grunts, "He's out back. Waiting on you."
You glance to the back door as if it were possible to see through it; the desire to lay your eyes on his blue ones and hug him tight overwhelming every thought in your head.
"Thanks," you say, setting your purse and bag down on the counter. already stepping toward the back door.
"Y/N," Scott calls.
You groan as you turn around, eyes narrowing at him.
"Could you guys not do whatever it is you do on surfaces that I have to use at some point?"
His smirk is mischievous but his gaze is serious. You just shake your head and turn away from him, taking a few steps toward the door. Suddenly, you freeze. What on earth made Scott say that, you're not sure. But everything clicks for you right then.
Wheezie stalling you at the mall.
Rafe being at your house when you come home.
Your parents and Scott vacating the house.
You turn back around to Scott, watching his smirk grow before he turns around and walks out of the kitchen without another word. You puff out your cheeks and run your hand through your hair, trying to run over a mental checklist of what you should do before you go find him for whatever the hell this is about. Without a second thought, you rush up the stairs and into your room, changing quickly into Rafe's favorite black lingerie set and patting your already coated blush brush over your cheeks, then brush your teeth.
Yes, it's been months. Yes, Rafe would kiss you and love you regardless of the underwear you're wearing or what you taste like right then. Some part of you just feels like, whatever this is, he's put thought into it. Rafe always does. The least you can do is take five minutes to try and make things a little better for him.
You rush back down the stairs and open the back door with a deep breath; not nervous, but anxious to see what this is all about. You step out onto the patio, looking at the string lights hung from the trees in your backyard, ones that weren't there when you left earlier. The pool lights are on, set to purple, which you'd told him was your favorite.
With another step forward you see Rafe, sitting on a blanket with his legs dangled over the side of the pool. The same spot he used to sit in with you after dinners. Your eyes brush over the bouquet of roses, a bottle of wine, and food options on the blanket with him, but you hurry out to him before you can get a better look.
He turns and smiles when he hears the door open, then pulls his feet out of the water and stands. On his way up, he grabs the roses from the blanket, holding them up to his chest.
"Hi, baby," he greets shyly, "How was your day?"
Your heart melts in your chest at his sweetness, giving him a smile as you walk toward him.
"Good. Missed you," you tell him.
He grins and moves the roses away from his chest to pull you into him, wrapping one arm around you to hold you close. You cuddle into his chest and breathe him in, angling your head up to plant a kiss on his throat. He hums at the action, pressing a kiss into your hair.
"Missed you, too," he says quietly.
"What is all this?" you ask, pulling back only slightly so you can see his face.
"Well," he smiles at you, his grin making your heart stop momentarily, "I was hoping to ask you something."
"Oh, yeah?" you tease him.
You look around the pool, finding that Rafe lit candles and laid them out around the length of the pool. Between the string lights, the candles, and him, you can feel your heart physically growing in your chest.
"Mhm," he hums, smile pulling wider on his lips, "Be my valentine."
You grin wide, "Is that a question or a demand?"
He cocks his head from one side to another as if he's considering the question, his smile transforming into a smirk.
"More of a suggestion, I guess," he says.
You bite your lip to hide your wide smile, then nod your head slowly. The grip he has on your waist tightens and he tucks you in closer, smiling impossibly wider.
"Okay," you agree, "Only because you brought wine."
"I knew the wine was gonna make or break this whole thing," he teases.
You giggle, standing on your tip-toes and pressing a kiss to his lips. He kisses you back immediately, almost dropping the flowers in his hand just to hold you against him for as long as he possibly can. When you pull back, he holds the bouquet between the two of you.
"For you," he says.
You laugh and accept them, giving him another cheesy smile and kiss.
"Thank you," you whisper against his lips.
You pull him down to sit, ready to fully admire and praise what he has done for you. He pulls you close to him, both of you dipping your feet into the pool the same way you've done together so many times. He leans back on his elbow and pours two glasses of wine, handing one off to you with a kiss to your cheek.
"So, this is what you were doing all afternoon," you say before you take a sip.
He bites down a smile, "Well, I did mow the lawn, too."
"I noticed," you say, reaching for his hand, "It looks great. It always does."
He squeezes your hand, watching you smile up at him.
"Thanks, sweetheart," he whispers.
You take another sip of your wine and then scoot closer, feeling him untangle your fingers and wrapping his arm around you instead.
"Rafe," you say quietly, and when he looks down at you, you continue, "This is... I mean, it's so-"
"We can definitely go out somewhere, if you'd prefer. I know it's, like, weird having our first Valentine's Day in your backyard or whatever, but I just thought, y'know, this is where we held hands for the first time, it's where you kissed me for the first time, so-"
"Rafe," you repeat, laughing lightly, reaching up and stroking his cheek with your fingertips, "I don't want anything else. This is so perfect. You did it for me, I mean, how could it not be?"
"Are you sure?" he asks, hesitance written all over his face.
You smile and shake your head at him, then grab ahold of his chin with your free hand and kiss your answer into him. He accepts it and even moves to deepen it, but you pull back before he can. He groans, which quickly transforms to a smile when he sees the one on your lips.
"I'm sure," you confirm, "I love you."
"I love you, too," he smiles, "Always have and always will."
His arm returns around you as you lay your head down on his shoulder, splaying your fingers out on his knee. He presses a kiss into your hair, his heart beating fast in his chest regardless of the fact that you two have been together for months.
"Can I tell you a secret?" you whisper.
"Please do."
You chuckle and say, "I used to wear cute sets underneath my dresses for Thursday dinners after we held hands out here."
Rafe's shoulders freeze; his breath momentarily stopped as he pictures you picking out cute lingerie just because you'd be seeing him for the evening. You smirk, shifting ever so slightly so you can look up and see his facial expression. He's staring out at the water, lips slightly parted as he processes.
"Are you-" he stops to clear his throat, "Are you serious?"
"I am," you grin.
He exhales, a sort of groan heard from the back of his throat at the confirmation. Rafe sets his wine glass down and you do the same, knowing this is leading somewhere. You sit up and he pulls his arm out from around you, smirking down at you as he turns closer.
"Well, that's good to know. I'm glad I didn't know that then, because I would've been a lot less of a gentleman," he grins.
You playfully roll your eyes, but before you can come up with a response, he pulls his arm around the front of you and guides you to lay down on your back, using his other hand to push containers of food back to give you more room.
"What if I'm hungry?" you tease him.
He smirks and shakes his head, "Just a minute. I'm testing a theory."
"Oh?" you question, smiling, "What would that be?"
"Well," he speaks innocently, although his hand trailing its way down your body is anything but, "If you picked out lingerie for me then, well, who knows what I'm going to find..."
He trails off when his hand slips under your shirt, slowly and playfully guiding it up, up, up until his favorite black set becomes visible to him.
"Here," he finishes his sentence, but the word comes out more breathy and weak than his others.
You giggle as you watch him lick his lips; the fact that he's seen you in this many times still never deters him from drinking you in every time he does. You quickly tell yourself you're so glad you went upstairs before coming outside.
"Jesus," he mutters.
"You're such a boy," you tease him.
He laughs and playfully rolls his eyes, then allows his hand to escape the warmth of your skin to slide down to the button on your shorts. He swallows visibly, Adam's apple bobbing in his throat, and then undoes them.
"Maybe we should eat before this part," he says. His voice tells you he really doesn't want that.
You run a hand across his cheek, feeling his freshly shaved skin and loving knowing he did that for you.
"I haven't seen you all day," you argue, "Rather do this."
He nods slightly and then leans down, allowing your lips to meet his. He's slow and passionate at first, then becomes more urgent as your permission sinks in. His hands crawl back up your shirt and snake behind your back, pulling you up again. You make room for yourself in his lap, straddling him at the edge of the pool the same way you have a million times.
"This looks familiar," he grins when you pull away.
You laugh and kiss him again, impossibly slow, "I love you."
"I love you, too, sweetheart. Happy Valentine's Day."
When you look down at him, feeling his strong arms around you, holding you, and the pool lights reflecting off of his blue eyes, you know nothing will ever compare to this. To him.
"Happy Valentine's Day, Rafe."
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marvelatthetwilight · 3 years
Text
The Fight
Requested
Anonymous said: Could you do an imagine where Sam and the reader have like a really big fight or something like that but it ends in pure fluff?? Please! I just need more Sam content! ❤ thnx
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“I can’t even look at you right now!” You shout across the room. Sam’s face is pink with anger, he’s shaking, with a small growl starting in his chest.
“Sam just go away!” You run up the stairs, slamming the bedroom door behind you and fling yourself on the bed, tears streaming down your face, your breathing heavy as you sob into the pillows.
You hear a door slam downstairs, then the definite sound of Sam’s wolf growling as he runs towards the tree line. You would recognise that sound anywhere, although normally it would be waiting for him to come home after patrol. This time, you weren’t sure if he would come home, but right now you didn’t care.
Wrapping yourself in a blanket, you curl up on your side of the bed, fully dressed. Suddenly feeling tired from the fight, eventually you allow the exhaustion to kick in as you fall straight asleep.
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A week later
“You’ve got to come see him Y/N he looks a mess” Paul pleads through the door.
“Nope! He can come to me, I’m not apologising.” You respond, looking at yourself in the mirror, bags under your eyes, skin looking flat and lifeless. Being away from Sam was definitely having an effect, but you weren’t going to admit to Paul that you couldn’t sleep without Sam, that you were struggling to eat, or have any kind of fun.
“That’s the problem Y/N. He just won’t get up. He’s not sleeping, not eating. I don’t even know how long it’s been since he cracked a smile. Pleaaaase!” Paul pleads again.
“I’m not coming Paul. I need time.” You say softly.
“Ok. Just let us know if we can do anything to help you two. We need our pack leader back. Urgently.”
You hear his steps away from the house and the door slam to his truck. You sigh deeply, trudging back upstairs to throw yourself on the bed again.
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The following week
After being sent home Monday morning for exploding at a customer, you realised you needed to get your life back on track. You needed to shower. Properly. You needed to eat. Properly. But to do all of that you needed one thing.
You needed Sam.
Grabbing your phone, you type a message out to Paul.
- Is Sam at yours?
- Yup. On the sofa. Not moved all day.
- I'll be over in 30 minutes.
- YEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!
You smile at Paul's reaction. As much as you wanted Sam to be the one to come to you, the imprint link had left you both sad and exhausted, and you couldn't continue the fight any longer. You needed him. You knew from the fights you'd seen from Kim and Jared that the pack felt everything far deeper than their imprints. You didn't want to punish him any longer.
Jumping in the shower you start mentally preparing your speech for when you see Sam. I don't want to feel second best to the pack. I understand what the pack means to you but I need to feel important too.
You grab whatever bits of make up you can find and make your best attempt to cover up the bags which have formed under your eyes. Pulling on a pair of jeans and a loose fitting top, you brush through your hair and take a final look in the mirror. It'll do.
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Before you even get to knock on Paul's front door, it swings open to show Paul and Jared, both looking tired but excited to see you.
"Y/N!" Jared shouts, running towards you to give you a hug. He pulls back and keeps a hand on either arm, looking you in the eyes. "Please don't feel pressured if this isn't what you want yet. I know Paul kept ringing...and Sam is in a pretty bad way. But we want you to be happy too."
You smile sadly at him. "I need this too Jared, don't worry. I'm doing this for me."
Paul gives you a thumbs up from behind Jared before coming to hug you himself. He leaves an army draped around your shoulders as you both walk up the steps.
"He's still on the sofa...we will leave you two alone. We're going out on a quick patrol!" With that he drops a quick kiss on your cheek and jogs towards the treeline with Jared in tow.
You look up at the house and take a deep breath, pulling open the door and stepping inside the house.
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What hits you first is the smell. Sam’s smell. A smell that’s been a comfort to you every night since you met. A smell that you have desperately missed, but has immediately put your mind at ease now it has filled your senses again.
Walking through the house towards the back room, you walk hesitantly towards the sound of the TV. As you reach the doorway, he stands up from the sofa and turns to look at you. His face is etched with sadness, tears pricking at the corners of his eyes, dark bags underneath them from lack of sleep, hair messy and dishevelled. “Y/N...” he whispers, his eyes wide with shock, hands desperate to reach out to you but hesitant in case it makes you leave.
You smile at the sound of his voice. “I’ve missed you baby.”
The corners of his mouth twitch at the word baby, and he rushes towards you, wrapping you up in his arms. He breathes in the scent of your hair, his arms wandering your body before they make their way to your face, delicately cupping your cheeks before hesitating again. He looks deeply into your eyes, searching for approval, searching for confirmation that things will be ok.
You step back. His hopeful expression looks deflated, then confused as you take his hand and lead him back to the sofa. “We need to talk first.” He nods in understanding.
You both sit down, side by side, and you take his hand back in yours, stroking it softly with your fingers. He looks up at you with sad eyes, desperately trying to read your expression.
“I know how important the pack is, not just to you but to the reservation. I understand the importance. But I need to feel important to you too. My life is overwhelmed with the pack, with this life, and I just feel like I’m a passenger just going along for the ride. I feel like I have no control. Like I have no purpose. I’m just “Sam’s imprint”...is that all I am?” Feeling confident in your rehearsed lines you look at Sam, who’s eyebrows are burrowed as he stares at the ground.
“You know you are so much more than that Y/N.” He says quietly.
“I don’t though Sam. You never tell me. You never talk about things. I only know because of the imprint bond.” You move away from him slightly, letting go of his hands, frustration evident in your voice.
“You...” he starts, then looks at the ground again
“I don’t know how much more I can take if you can’t tell me what you are feeling Sam. Please.” You beg, as you reach out to him again.
He takes your hand in his and turns to face you, looking down into your eyes. His expression is warm, immediately comforting, and you have to force yourself to not be sucked back in to his loving embrace.
“You. Are the love of my life. No one else’s love will ever come close to what I feel for you. But that scares me. It scares me because I never feel good enough, I never feel like I can live up to be the man that you deserve. The only thing I can do is to keep you safe. And to keep you safe I need to make my pack strong, I need them to be impossible to defeat. I’m so so sorry that in my eagerness to make the pack strong that you felt unimportant. But I’m making the pack what it is because you are so important, the most important person in the whole world. I love you Y/N and I promise to never let you feel second best ever again...if you will have me that is.” He takes a deep breath, his confidence wavering because you haven’t spoken.
“Y/N...?”
A tear slips from the corner of your eye before you reach over and wrap your arms around his neck, taking him by surprise so he falls backwards onto the couch.
You don’t know how long you stay like that, with his arms wrapped around you, lips pressed to the top of your head as your face is buried into his neck, taking in the comfort of his scent.
It’s only when you hear an awkward cough that you realise anyone is there.
“Take it the two of you have made up?” Paul jokes, as Sam growls at him for interrupting.
You smile up at him, placing your hand on his chest to calm him.
“It’s ok, I’m not going anywhere.” He returns your smile before pressing a kiss to your lips whilst Paul and Jared make gagging noises in the background.
“Ugh it’s like mum and dad kissing!” Jared complains.
“No one asked you to stand there. Go back on patrol, the two of you are pulling a double for interrupting.” Sam orders, and they quickly comply, complaining as they leave the room.
He turns his attention back to you, stroking your cheek with his thumb whilst looking deeply into your eyes.
“I love you Sam.”
“I love you too Y/N.”
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helloalycia · 3 years
Text
worth the wait [one] // daisy johnson
summary: when your best friend, Skye, keeps running away from home, you're left to deal with the consequences, but then one day, she doesn't come back.
warning/s: mentions of unwanted foster kids
author’s note: this is a five parter and each chapter is quite long bc i got carried away. i've literally been working on this for so long so i hope there's still some daisy johnson stans out there to appreciate this!
part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | masterlist | wattpad
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"She's the only person she talks to... doesn't listen to anyone... just try..."
I twiddled my thumbs as I refrained from rolling my eyes. Mr Lock was pretty stupid if he thought I couldn't hear him with the door slightly ajar.
"...can't do much... good student?"
"She'll tell you what she knows," I heard Mr Lock say more clearly, to the police officer, before the door got pushed open.
I glanced at him as he feigned a smile for my sake, making his way over to his desk and sitting opposite me. The police officer followed after him, taking a seat at the edge of the desk and watching me with curious eyes like she was studying my every move.
"As you are probably aware, Miss Y/L/N, your friend Skye has gone missing," Mr Lock began to explain. "Her foster family have tried contacting her, but they can't find her."
I felt nervous with the police officer watching me, trying not to glance her way for fear she'd know I was hiding something.
"We just want to bring her home safely," Mr Lock continued. "And you're the closest person to her."
It wasn't a question – he knew I was the closest person to her. We'd done this back and forth many times before, every time Skye decided to run away. And it didn't get any easier.
I swallowed hard. "If you're asking me if I know where she is, I can promise you I don't."
Technically I wasn't lying, so that wasn't too much of a stretch.
"Have you had any contact with her since yesterday morning?" the police officer asked.
I shook my head and tried to ignore how warm I was getting. "I usually meet her by the entrance before class, but she wasn't there. I thought she was just pulling a sick day or something."
The officer hummed in response and the way she didn't give away what she was thinking didn't help with my nerves.
"So, you know nothing of Skye's disappearance?" Mr Lock asked with a raised eyebrow. "Anything you can tell us will be greatly appreciated. Her family just want her home and we all want her to be safe. You know the drill."
"I want that, too," I lied as confidently as I could. "You know she's done this before... she'll come back. She always does."
Mr Lock sighed and rested his head in his hands; he was clearly exhausted from having this same chat with me every few months Skye decided to leave.
"I think that's everything," the police officer said, before standing up straight. She glanced at me, adding, "Thank you for your cooperation. Please let your teacher know if you hear anything from her."
I nodded awkwardly. "Will do."
Mr Lock stood up, hand on his hip with mild frustration. He nodded my way and waved a hand dismissively. "Okay, you can go now, Y/N. Back to class, go on."
I nodded and looked between them both before grabbing my backpack and heading to the door. I could hear them talking quietly though, and felt mildly guilty for lying.
"...does this regularly now," the police officer was saying. "She'll turn up."
"She's wasting our time," Mr Lock was mumbling. "She always does this and for what?"
I sighed inwardly before leaving his office and heading back to class. I continued on with my school day as normal, up until lunchtime when I got a message from Skye herself.
Heading to the toilets to ensure nobody would see me, I slipped into a cubicle and pulled out the burner phone Skye gave me the first time she ever ran away a few years ago. She was always cautious of being caught out but still wanted to be able to contact me, so this was her solution. I didn't argue it as I only ever wanted to make sure she was okay and I could at least talk to her.
She'd texted me, it reading: Meet me by the ice cream truck in the park after school.
I was relieved to know she was okay, since it was the first text she'd sent me since she left yesterday morning. But it was frustrating that she'd disregarded my many concerned texts before that.
With a huff, I replied: I'm doing good, thanks for asking. You could've texted sooner, Skye.
It took a moment before she responded. Sorry, mom
I rolled my eyes, knowing she'd have that annoyingly cute smile on her face as she texted from wherever the hell she was.
Another text came through from her. Sorry I didn't reply sooner. Everything cool with the cops?
I sighed and hastily replied: Everything is as cool as it can be. I'll talk to you later when I see you. You safe?
Every time she left, she came back without a scratch to my relief, but it didn't make me feel any better when she would leave again and again. Running was her way of rebelling against everything – the countless foster families she went through, the teachers who ridiculed her, the other students who judged her. I didn't know where she went – it would change every time and I was sure she was making it up to make me feel better – but I covered for her because I cared about her and didn't want her to push me away like she did with everyone else. It was getting old though.
Her text came through and the heaviness on my shoulders lifted with relief. I'm always safe. But thanks for caring.
I always care. You know that.
I do. I'll see you later, Y/N. Love you.
I love you, too. See you later.
She stopped responding and I put the phone away before taking a deep breath. Seventeen and Skye had me feeling like a soldier's wife at freakin' war. She was gonna give me a heart attack one of these days.
"Over here."
I spun around and felt my racing heart calm down when I saw the familiar teasing smile of Skye watching me behind the abandoned ice cream truck.
"You're okay," I breathed out with relief before moving forward and pulling her in for a tight hug.
She laughed but wrapped her arms around me, squeezing gently. "I always am, I told you."
I refrained from rolling my eyes as I pulled away, meeting her gaze. "I'll always worry, Skye."
Momentarily, her playful demeanour disappeared and was replaced with something genuine. "I know... sorry. Thanks for coming."
I ran a hand through my hair and sighed. "Skye, you can't keep running away like this. Mr Lock called me in again. Thinks I know where you are. Says your family are worried."
Skye snorted as she took a seat on the bench nearby. "They're probably throwing a party in my absence. This is just protocol for them. All of them."
I watched her with a pitiful gaze before taking a seat next to her. "The police came again."
"But you covered, right?" Skye asked with a quirked brow.
"Obviously," I said, making her smile, but I didn't return it. "I hate lying to them. It makes me feel... dirty."
"It's not like you're hiding the location of a war criminal, Y/N, chill," she teased, patting my knee.
"Where were you this time?" I asked, afraid to know the answer.
A grin appeared on her lips with remembrance as she reached into her backpack, pulling out a laptop.
I furrowed my eyebrows. "Where d'you get that?" 
She seemed proud as she said, "I won it in a bet."
"Skye!"
"What? It was fair play and I happened to win," she said with a shrug.
I facepalmed. "Skye, if you needed a laptop, you should've asked. I could have asked my parents or– or– I don't know–"
"What? Fundraised for the poor foster girl in class who can't buy a laptop like everyone else?" she cut me off bitterly, before replacing the laptop in her bag. "I'd rather not."
I frowned, moving to rest a hand on her back, but she shook me off harshly before standing up.
"Skye, I didn't mean it like that," I said apologetically, standing up, too. "I just meant– I could have helped. I want to help. I don't want you to have to make bets to get stuff. I just want you to be safe."
Skye and I becoming friends was something I never could have seen coming, but when we were partnered in science class in middle school, we kind of just fell into each other's lives. I knew of her situation with her many foster families and always knew she deserved better. Sometimes though, I think she felt the difference in our lives when it came to little things like buying stuff, and I hated it.
"Skye–"
"It's okay," she interrupted, glancing at me with sad eyes. "I know you want to help. But I'm okay."
Treading carefully, I asked, "Where did you go then?"
She ran a hand through her hair. "Library."
I narrowed my eyes. "You expect me to believe that?"
She met my eyes and shrugged. "You don't have to, but it's the truth."
I couldn't be bothered arguing with her, so I simply played along. "Fine. You went to the library and won a bet with someone, getting their laptop."
"Exactly."
I gave her a knowing look. "When are you coming back? To school?"
She was about to respond, but her phone vibrated and she checked it quickly, her eyes lighting up. I tried not to roll my eyes at her change of mood, not wanting to imagine the bond she'd made with her new friends.
She finally answered. "A few days, I promise."
It wasn't much, but it was better than nothing, so I nodded. "Okay. A few days. You'll keep in touch though, yeah?"
"I will, I promise," she said with a small smile before moving forward and hugging me tightly. "Thanks, Y/N."
I sighed but returned her hug, knowing I couldn't stay mad at her for long. "Just please take care of yourself, Skye. And if you need anything – and I mean anything – just ask. Unfortunately, I have a soft spot for your dumbass."
She laughed and admittedly, my stomach did somersaults at the sound. She pulled away but kept within arm's reach, allowing me to see the honesty shining in her brown eyes.
"I'll see you in a few days," she promised. "I love you."
"I love you, too," I replied, watching as she stepped back to leave.
She sent a final smile my way before running away, leaving me standing there alone and with a worried heart.
"More than you'll know," I muttered to myself, knowing I could never tell her how I truly felt.
"Won't your mum kill you for this?"
I shrugged, leading Skye through the the party-goers and to the kitchen where the drinks were. "She's okay with it because she knows I'm responsible. Plus, I promised her I wouldn't get drunk."
Skye let out a laugh. "Right. You're at a high school party and you're not gonna drink. That's totally happening."
I poured myself and Skye a drink as I quirked a brow. "I never said I wasn't going to drink. Just that I wouldn't get drunk. There's a difference, Skye."
She seemed impressed as she nodded. "Sneaky."
I was invited to this party by some girl in class and thought it would be nice for Skye and I to go to since it had been a while since we'd hung out. She didn't want to go at first, but after a little convincing on my end, she joined me.
We ended up staying there for about an hour when Skye needed to go to the bathroom and I decided to grab a snack from the kitchen. As I was browsing the bowls and considering whether I wanted to risk grabbing food from a shared bowl, I felt someone tap my shoulder from behind me.
When I turned, I was surprised to see a very tall guy stood there with a smirk on his face.
"It's Y/N, right?" he began the conversation, before suddenly raising his hand and reaching for something in my hair. "Sorry, you had some fluff there."
I smiled awkwardly and pushed my hair behind my ear. "Er, thanks. Yeah, I'm Y/N. I'm sorry, I don't think I recognise you."
He shook his head. "I didn't think you would. We don't go to the same school. I saw you walking around and thought I'd introduce myself."
"Oh, er..." I didn't know what to say as I wasn't really interested in his clear advances.
"Can I get you a drink?" he asked suddenly, still smirking at me.
"I already have one," I said conclusively, before aiming to move past him, but he put his arm in the way. I looked at it before raising my eyebrow at him. "You gonna let me go?"
He snickered. "Come on, just let me get you a drink."
"I'm not interested," I told him straightforwardly before attempting to make another move, but he pushed me back gently. "Dude, come on."
"What's one drink gonna do?" he asked persistently (and annoyingly).
"I–"
"She said back off," another voice came out of nowhere, and suddenly Skye appeared and pushed the guy back harshly, stepping between us.
"Skye, I–" I began, but the guy was already glaring down at her with a fake smile on his lips.
"Or what?" he asked rhetorically.
She returned his glare and said nothing. I rested a hand on her arm and tried to tug her backwards, but she wasn't moving. Always the stubborn one.
"What are you gonna do, Skye?" he repeated with bitter humour. "You gonna call the cops? I heard they know you pretty well by now, don't they?"
"Don't speak to her like that," I said angrily, glaring at him.
He began to laugh, shaking his head, before finally walking away. I released a deep breath and watched as Skye turned around to face me.
"Are you alright?" I asked her gently, resting a hand on her arm as I found her eyes.
"Are you?" she countered, looking over me with concern. "That guy was a jackass."
"He was, but I had it under control," I said with reassurance, before downing the rest of my drink and throwing the cup in the bin. "You didn't need to step in."
"Uh, yeah, I did," she said, stepping in my line of sight. "He was a creep."
I rolled my eyes playfully. "Okay, Skye, whatever you say. Thank you."
"You're welcome, now can we leave?"
I shoved her in the shoulder slightly. "We're not leaving. Not yet anyway. There's a foosball table in the other room I wanna play with and you're playing, too."
She sighed dramatically. "Fine."
I grinned at her before dragging her to the other room by her hand.
Another hour passed when I unfortunately began to feel the effects of my drink that I later came to learn was spiked by the arsehole who tried to hit on me. I wasn't particularly aware of my actions, otherwise I definitely wouldn't have done nor said half the things I did. Things like playing beer pong for the third time in a row and losing every game.
"It's just me an' you, Y/L/N," Kate, the girl I was playing with, said as we both a had a cup left. "Think you can win?"
I laughed as I rolled the ball between my fingers. "Third time's the charm...?"
The group of teenagers around us watched with anticipation as I aimed the shot up in my mind. It wasn't exactly helpful that I could barely stand up straight and my eyes were crossing over, making the cup move around slowly.
"One... two... three...," I counted down, before tossing the ball and watching it bounce off the side of the table and onto the floor. "Well, shit."
Everybody laughed as I ran a hand through my hair. Kate chuckled before grabbing the ball and lining it up. Miles better than I did, she aimed quickly and got it in the cup in one shot, resulting in cheers from everyone. I laughed and grabbed the cup, eyeballing the beer. I wasn't really a fan of beer, but a game was a game.
I downed the cup and pulled a face at how disgusting it tasted, before tossing the cup on the floor. I pushed away from the table I was leaning on, before falling back and hitting the floor, butt-first. I giggled to myself as I tried to stand up, but with great difficulty.
"Y/N, there you are!"
I looked up and lit up when I saw none other than Skye standing above me. She bent down and grabbed my hands before helping me stand up. I stumbled into her, but thankfully she caught my weight and let me lean on her for support.
"How did you get drunk so quickly?" she asked with surprise, leading me to the front door. "I've literally been with you. Until you ditched me twenty minutes ago which wasn't cool since I only came to this stupid party because of you."
I laughed. "I'm sorry. I saw the ping pong table and couldn't resist."
She sighed to herself before leading me outside. "You smell like alcohol."
"That's because I had some," I whispered not-so-quietly in her ear, before erupting into giggles.
"I gotta get you home," she mumbled, before searching my pockets. "Where are your keys?"
"My mum is gonna k-kill me," I realised, but a dopey smile was on my lips. "You have to sleepover."
She found my keys and began leading me to my car. "I'm gonna have to, aren't I? So much for not getting drunk."
I covered my mouth to try and stop the laughter from spilling out. She didn't seem amused as she managed to get me into the passenger's seat before rounding the car to the driver's seat. When she got comfortable, I watched her with a childish grin.
"You can't drive," I said in a know-it-all voice. "You didn't pass your test, silly."
She started the engine and began doing her mirror checks before pulling out, muttering, "Nobody has to know."
I watched as she drove, feeling exhausted but lighter than usual. She looked really pretty tonight. I wanted to tell her when we went to the party, but I didn't want her to get the wrong idea. Now however, it was all I could think about and my heart was fluttering at the thought.
"Here, drink this," she ordered, before throwing a bottle of water into my lap.
"But–"
"No buts, just drink it," she said authoritatively, glancing at me.
I didn't want to argue with her, so I began opening the bottle as I giggled to myself. "You said butts."
She groaned to herself and I drank the water as instructed, even if I really didn't want to.
Before I knew it, we had arrived at my house and Skye was helping me to the door.
"Your mum knows you're coming back late, so this shouldn't be a problem," she said quietly, mostly to herself. "Try not to make noise though, okay?"
I nodded obediently, before putting my finger to my mouth. "Sshhhh. Quiet."
She rolled her eyes before using my keys to open the door and drag me inside. I stayed as quiet as I could, letting her take me upstairs and to my room. Only, before we could go in, I heard my mum call out for me.
"Y/N, love, is that you?"
I stared blankly at Skye as she gave me a knowing look with wide eyes, nodding. I continued staring at her as my mum called my name again.
"Answer her!" she whisper-shouted to me.
"But you said to stay quiet," I said with confusion.
She facepalmed. "Just answer her," she said with frustration.
"Well then, no need to get crabby," I mumbled before calling out to mum, "It's me, mum! Skye and I are back!"
There was a pause before she called back, "Okay! Make sure you lock the front door!"
I snickered to myself as Skye shoved me into my bedroom before I could reply.
"Will do, Mrs Y/L/N!" Skye called out before slipping into my room with me.
She flicked on the light as I flopped onto my bed with a satisfied sigh. Suddenly, something was tossed onto my face making me groan as I pulled them off. I realised they were pyjamas.
"Get changed. Now."
I sat up and saw Skye watching me with a stern expression. I couldn't help but smile to myself, giggling. She looked really cute when she pretended to be angry.
"Y/N," she warned.
"I'm not tired," I lied, standing up. I wanted any excuse to keep on talking to her.
"I don't care," she said with a shrug. "You're going to bed whether you like it or not."
"But I wanna talk to you," I whined like a child, before moving forward to grab her hand.
She let go and gently pushed me to the bed. "Don't be a baby, Y/N."
I hugged her quickly, smiling to myself. "Thank you for being here. And for coming with me tonight."
"Yeah, yeah..."
"I'm serious," I said, pulling away and almost falling backwards, but she held me upright. "Thanks."
Her expression softened. "Unfortunately, that's what friends are for, Y/N. I wasn't gonna leave you."
I breathed out, momentarily startled by her sharp gaze. She had the most beautiful eyes, I always thought it. Somehow, she had the power to make me freeze up and forget everything I was thinking or going to say and I never knew why.
"I love you," I said truthfully, not caring what I was saying and too overcome with emotion to care.
She rolled her eyes, a smile of amusement dancing on her lips. "You gotta keep it down, Y/N."
I smiled widely. "But I do."
She gave me a knowing look. "I know you do. And I love you, too, but you have to get ready. Tomorrow morning is not gonna be kind to you."
"No, you don't get it, I really love you, Skye," I said, my mouth going dry as I stared at her with butterflies in my stomach.
"I know," she played along, patting me on the shoulder. "You done, idiot?"
"I'm in love with you," I blurted suddenly, smile disappearing. I stared at her, trying to ignore the blurriness in my vision. "I always have been."
Her smile seemed to fade when she realised how serious I had become. She licked her lips and shook her head slowly, lowering her hands.
"You don't know what you're saying, Y/N," she said quietly.
I grew distracted by her lips, barely acknowledging what was coming out of her mouth. "I do," I told her.
She didn't know what to say, and before I knew it, I had moved forward and pressed my lips to hers. It was something I'd wanted to do for so long and now that I was finally doing it, my shoulders felt lighter as if I wasn't carrying a huge secret on them anymore.
I closed my eyes and momentarily felt her kiss back, hands resting on my chest. It didn't last very long as she gently pushed me away, leaving me face to face with her flushed cheeks and swollen lips. I was sure I didn't look any different.
"You're drunk," she stated awkwardly.
I swallowed the lump in my throat and began to come to terms with what I'd just done, what I'd just ruined. I stepped back and shook my head.
I swallowed the lump in my throat and began to come to terms with what I'd just done, what I'd just ruined. I stepped back and shook my head.
"I'm so sorry, Skye. I–"
"It's okay," she reassured me. "Please, let's just get you ready for bed, okay?"
I avoided her eyes as I nodded, feeling my heart ache with discomfort.
When I woke up the next morning, I didn't remember much from the night before. At least not straight away. All I had to remind me of it was an insane headache that wouldn't go away and a rancid taste in my mouth. Thankfully, Skye caught me up with how drunk I was and how she had to stay with me to cover for me before she left me to shower and freshen up.
Unfortunately for me, showering and freshening up gave me enough time to remember parts of the night before, including the main bit where I kissed my best friend and expressed my feelings for her.
To say I was freaking out was an understatement. I couldn't believe I had done the very thing I had avoided for years. Seeing her at the breakfast table made me wonder why she hadn't mentioned it. Was she embarrassed? Did she want to pretend it never happened? Was she uncomfortable?
I wasn't sure whether to go along and pretend I couldn't remember it, or admit the truth and apologise profusely. In the end, I ended up doing the latter.
We were eating pancakes that she'd made with my mum as I spoke up.
"So, I, er, I'm kinda remembering some stuff from last night," I said awkwardly, glancing up at her.
She slowed down with her eating, avoiding my eyes. "You do?"
I nodded, looking back down to my food. "Yeah. Particularly the, well, I–"
"You don't have to say it," she assured me, and I looked up to see her watching me with a small smile.
"I'm really sorry," I got out with a deep breath. "I don't know why I did that. Or said those things. It was stupid."
"It was?"
"You should've left after that, but you didn't for some reason," I continued with a grimace of embarrassment. "We can totally pretend it didn't happen."
She chewed on the inside of her mouth as she nodded slowly in agreement. I nodded, too, eyes falling to my pancakes.
"Thanks," I mumbled. "And thank you for making sure I was okay. You're a really great friend."
She smiled at me with distracted eyes. "Anytime, Y/N."
136 notes · View notes
ming-yu-hao · 3 years
Text
Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder | Chapter 3
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Pairing: fratboy!mingyu x female reader
Word Count: 6k
Synopsis: When you transferred to a different university, you and Wonwoo promised that you would make long distance work. But distance proves to be more difficult than you both originally thought.
This Chapter’s Tags: angst, protected sex, finger sucking, grinding, light choking/spanking/dirty talk, mingyu just being an ass man, riding, cheating obviously
Warning: THIS SERIES IS ABOUT CHEATING. DO NOT READ IF IT MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE!
A/N: Y’ALLLLL I’m sorry this took me forever to upload... I just got super busy but there won’t be as long as a wait for the next chapter! As always feedback is appreciated and I hope you guys like this :)
Chapters: Previous | Next | Masterlist
Your knees quivered beneath you as you pulled the soft fabric of your leggings up your thighs and over your hips. You bent down to pick up your shirt that was still balled up on the floor, and when you stood again you could hear the bed rustle behind you as Mingyu shifted his weight.
Guilt didn't hit you until you slipped your shirt back over your head, fully dressing yourself once again.
What had you done?
Without looking at him, you spoke: "I think I should go now."
He was silent.
You stepped over to the door, your hand about to twist the knob when he finally called out to you.
"Y/N."
You looked at him. He was sitting up on his bed; his dark hair was a mess, hanging over his forehead. His lips were parted like he didn't know what to say.
"Um, don't forget your jacket. It's cold outside." He pointed to your jacket that was still discarded on the floor.
"Oh, thanks," you said with your voice wavering. You quickly picked up the jacket and headed for the door again.
"Text me when you get home, okay?" Mingyu rushed to say. The corners of his mouth quirked up into a thin, awkward smile and you nodded your head in response.
Why did he suddenly care? He used to just be some guy you sat next to in class. When did he want to become your friend? When did he start to become protective over you? Was this all really just because of his half-drunken encounter with you at that party? Did the moment you two shared that night cause him to feel some kind of attachment to you? Thinking about it all made your head spin. Nothing made sense to you anymore.
You turned the knob and cracked open the door when Mingyu spoke again.
"Um, also... you know, if you ever need anything... I'm here for you." His voice shook a bit.
You exhaled. "Thank you."
You slipped out of his room before he could say anything else and stepped down the stairs quietly, attempting to dart out the front door before anyone could see you. There was a small group of people hanging out in the living room like Mingyu had said, their laughter and conversations loud and echoing through the house.
When you reached the bottom of the stairs, you kept your gaze down at your feet while you scanned the floor for your shoes.
"Y/N?" You heard a voice call from behind you.
You huffed out a quiet breath in frustration before turning around with an overly sweet smile on your face. Your eyes landed on Seungcheol.
"Oh, hey! It's weird not seeing Jisoo following you around." You joked.
Seungcheol smiled sheepishly. "Yeah..." He trailed off, looking down at the ground.
"Are you guys dating?" You probed with a raised eyebrow.
"I wanted to talk to you about that, actually." He admitted, making eye contact with you. Curiosity plagued you, and you stared at him expectantly as you waited for him to speak. "I wanna do something special for her when I ask her out... just cause, I don't know, I really like her." He stammered nervously, lowering his voice so no one could eavesdrop.
You gave him a genuine smile. You were happy that Jisoo had found someone that truly liked her. Ever since the beginning of the semester, she had been cycling through an array of terrible guys that used and ghosted her. Seungcheol seemed like a genuinely good person; you trusted him to take care of her.
You brought your hand to your chin as you pondered for a moment. "Well, if I'm being honest, she's, like, a huge hopeless romantic. Loves cheesy romance movies and stuff." You started, "If you took her out to a nice dinner and walked around some really pretty, romantic place after, that'd be her dream come true."
Seungcheol nodded, his eyes glazed over in deep thought as he acknowledged your advice. "Yeah, that sounds like her." He smiled. "Thanks."
You nodded. "So... how did the raffle go?"
"It went really good, actually." He responded, shoving his hands in his pockets. "The money's going to a child psychology organization. I've been doing research with them for a few months now."
Your eyes lit up in interest at his story. "That's really cool. Have you discovered any groundbreaking research yet?" You half-joked.
He chuckled, "I guess a little bit."
A lightbulb suddenly went off in your brain. "Hey, do you think I could interview you about all this research stuff you've done? I need to write an article for class."
Seungcheol shrugged. "Sure."
You spent the next few minutes probing him about how he got involved in the program, what he had been researching, his motivation to study child psychology—all while taking down notes on your phone. He explained to you how he had struggled with anxiety his whole life and wanted to find a way to help others. In the back of your mind, this was all affirming why he was such a good match for Jisoo. He was caring, passionate, charitable. Your heart warmed at the thought of Jisoo finally settling down with someone who was actually a good person.
Your interview came to an end and you thanked Seungcheol for helping you out. He nodded before glancing down at the jacket you were carrying in your arms.
"Were you planning on leaving?" He asked.
"Yeah, I need to go work on homework and stuff." You answered.
He attempted to suppress his smirk by biting his lip. "You and Mingyu didn't get much work done together?" He raised his eyebrows at you.
You felt your heart drop into your stomach. "What?"
"Relax, I'm just kidding." Seungcheol laughed. "He just seemed comfortable with you earlier, you know?"
The tension in your stomach loosened a little as you realized that he didn't actually know what happened between you two. This is exactly what Mingyu was worried about earlier. So it was true that Seungcheol liked to play matchmaker and get involved in everyone else's relationships.
"There's nothing going on between you guys?" Seungcheol questioned after you didn't respond.
You felt your cheeks grow hot with irritation. "No. I have a boyfriend." You said curtly.
Seungcheol's mouth formed an O-shape at the sudden coldness in your tone. "I-I'm sorry, I was just kidding." He quickly apologized.
"It's okay." You sighed. You glanced around for your shoes, avoiding his regretful gaze.
"Well, I really have to get going. Thanks for helping me out." You said as you slipped on your shoes.
He smiled apologetically and walked you over to the door. "See you, Y/N!" He called behind you as you stepped out into the cold.
You buried yourself in work for the next two days. You figured it was easier to just get lost in the flow of doing assignment after assignment rather than to think about what happened.
But no matter what you did, your mind still wandered back to that moment—when your lips finally met Mingyu's, and his body pressed against yours.
The worst part was that you didn't even try to stop him: you had agreed to it, and God, you even thanked him for it! You weren't even sure if you could regret what happened. You hated yourself for betraying Wonwoo's trust, but at the same time you craved attention and affection. Mingyu just happened to be the one that fulfilled your wishes after all this time.
You would never tell Mingyu that, of course. Honestly, you were unsure if you could even face him about it. He could tell that you felt guilty afterwards. If you just finished this stupid project and avoided him for the rest of the semester, he would probably get the hint and leave you alone.
It was Saturday evening when you typed the last words of your article on Seungcheol and his research. You hadn't talked to Mingyu since you left his room on Thursday night, but you needed him to complete his share of the work. Sighing, you picked up your phone and pulled up your messages with him. You quickly explained what kind of pictures he needed to take and told him to send them to you (so you could avoid seeing him anymore than you needed to).
You clicked out of your conversation, and that's when your eyes landed on the messages that were still unread by Wonwoo. You wanted to ask him what he was doing, but after three days with no response, it felt pathetic to even attempt to strike up a conversation now.
The sound of the door knob jiggling startled you before Jisoo busted into the room a moment later.
"Y/N!" She cheered in a sing-song voice. "We have another party to go to tonight!"
You already knew exactly where this party was going to be, and you felt your stomach drop at the thought of running into Mingyu.
You shook your head. "No way, Jisoo. I'm way too busy." You lied.
She pouted her lips at you. "Really? You've been working nonstop. How're you still not done?"
You shrugged and let out an exaggerated sigh.
"Well, you can take a break for a few hours. I promise I won't leave you this time. You can hangout with me and Cheol." She begged, looking at you with wide, saddened eyes.
Your phone vibrated between your hands, and when you glanced down you saw Mingyu's name on the screen.
Mingyu: I'm actually gonna be out studying and working on some stuff with a friend tonight. I promise I'll get the pics for you tomorrow :) Sent at 7:37 PM
You thought it was a little weird for a guy like Mingyu to be studying on a Saturday night, but when you realized that he wouldn't be at the party, relief flooded over you.
You looked up at Jisoo and saw her still expectantly staring at you, waiting for your response.
"I- I guess I could go for a bit."
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"YES!" Seungkwan shrieked as he successfully landed another ball in one of Jisoo's cups. He turned to you and wildly smacked your palm in a high five, nearly hitting you in the face. Your stomach was starting to hurt from laughing for the past ten minutes over the intense match of beer pong in front of you.
The crowd around the table reacted loudly, some cheering and some booing as Jisoo downed another cup of alcohol. She shivered at the taste and Seungcheol came up from behind to pat her on the back. His lips moved as he said something to her, but with music blasting through the house so loud, you couldn't make out a single word.
Your phone vibrated in your back pocket. Without much thought, you pulled it out and quickly glanced at the screen.
Your heart sank into your stomach as you realized: Wonwoo was calling.
"Fuck," you muttered under your breath. You had completely forgotten that Saturday's were now reserved for your FaceTime dates.
You looked up at everyone with wide eyes, but they were too immersed in the game to notice your reaction. You pushed your way through the crowd and slipped into the bathroom before Jisoo or anyone else could come looking for you.
By the time you reached the bathroom and locked the door, the FaceTime call had already stopped ringing. Leaning against the door, you scrolled through your contacts and called back, but only as a phone call.
Wonwoo answered after two rings.
"Hey, everything alright?" He asked.
You swallowed. "Uh... yeah."
"Why didn't you FaceTime?" He continued. You hesitated, but then he spoke before you could say anything. "Why is it so loud? Where are you?"
You cursed yourself for not running away to a room that was farther away from all the music and noise outside the door. Fidgeting with your fingers, you answered: "A party."
"Oookay," he scoffed. "You could've at least let me know if you were gonna go out. But it's fine. Have fun, I guess." He responded coldly.
Your brows furrowed together instinctively. Now it was your turn to scoff at him. "You're not serious, are you?" The skin of your face grew warmer. Wonwoo was quiet. "I forgot. Sorry." You admitted through grit teeth.
"Why're you so mad?" He questioned in a defensive tone.
You rolled your eyes. "This is the first time I've ever cancelled on you and it was an accident. Do I need to remind you of all the times you ditched me?"
Wonwoo didn't respond.
"And what the fuck have you been doing the past three days that you couldn't respond to me?" You spat. Blood was rushing through your veins quickly now as anger took over.
He sighed through the receiver. "I was busy."
"Does it really take that much time to send a text to your fucking girlfriend?" Your voice began to rise. "How do you expect this to work if you don't even talk to me?"
"I'm sor-" He began to speak, but you interrupted him.
"You know, sometimes it feels like I'm dating nobody!" You cried. "Do you even realize how lonely I feel?" Your voice shook with each word as your throat grew tighter; tears welled up in your eyes. You didn't want to cry, but all the frustration you had bottled up the past couple months was finally spilling over.
In a calm voice, all Wonwoo said was: "I'm trying."
"Not hard enough." You scoffed.
"What the fuck, Y/N? Where is this coming from?" He cried. The sudden rise in his voice startled you a bit.
The phone shook in your grasp. "You act like I don't even exist! How can you call that trying?"
"Fuck, I'm not dealing with this right now. Go back to your stupid fucking party." He snapped.
"Yeah, just go and ignore me again!" You laughed sardonically.
The three tones of the call ending sounded abruptly. You looked down at your phone in shock. He had hung up on you.
Your hands balled into fists as you threw your head back against the door. Your jaw was tense, but your bottom lip still quivered.
He had done it again. It seemed it was becoming easy for him at this point—abandoning you when you needed him.
This wasn't going to last much longer if the two of you couldn't figure this out.
When you pressed your lips into a thin line, tears slipped down, staining the bags under your eyes with makeup.
Was he giving up on you?
Your head began to pound. You couldn't stand being in this hot bathroom any longer, much less this party in general. You wiped your cheeks with the back of your hand and turned to unlock the door.
As you took a step out of the bathroom, you kept your gaze locked on your feet; you didn't want anyone to notice the state you were currently in.
Not even a moment after opening the door, you collided with a tall, warm body.
"Sorry," you mumbled, pushing past.
"Y/N?" A familiar voice called. Strong hands grasped your forearm, and you glanced up at the figure.
Mingyu.
What force was bringing you back to him once again?
His lips parted in a small gasp as he noticed the redness in your tearful eyes. "Hey, what's wrong? Come here."
Before you could protest, he guided you back into the bathroom, closing and locking the door so no one could bother you two.
You kept your eyes down at the ground, unable to look at him. As he approached you, the heat of his skin radiated against you.
"I thought you were out studying." You spoke, breaking the silence.
Mingyu's hands found your jaw. He ran the smooth skin of his thumbs over your cheeks, wiping the tears that remained. "I finished early," he explained.
"Look at me," Mingyu whispered. You swallowed and blinked before meeting his eyes.
You didn't notice the thin, black-rimmed glasses that were resting on his nose before. His dark hair was pushed back, and his tan skin glowed under the bathroom light. You hated how instinctively drawn you felt to his presence.
You started to think that Kim Mingyu might be the Devil, disguised in the form of a beautiful boy that always knew the right words to say. He was here to tempt you, to swindle you at your most vulnerable moments, to test your fidelity. And you were weak enough to cave in.
"Is it your boyfriend?" He asked.
The gaze he held on you was so intense that you found yourself staring at the frames of his glasses instead of his eyes. You nodded silently in response to his question.
"Talk to me. What happened?" Mingyu cooed as he stroked your cheeks with his thumbs.
"I-" You started, but let out a sigh instead. "We just fought. I don't know. I don't wanna talk about it." You rambled.
"Okay," he nodded. "Sorry if I pushed it." He removed his hands from your face. The skin suddenly felt cold without his touch.
He sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets. "We can talk about something else."
You stood still, nodding, but couldn't think of anything to say.
"You know," Mingyu started, "You look really pretty. Even when you're crying." Your skin flushed at the compliment.
Rolling your eyes playfully, you wiped the last remnants of makeup off your cheeks. "Is that your go-to line for every girl?" You joked.
"No," he replied. "Just cause I'm in a frat doesn't mean I'm a douche."
You snickered under your breath. "Yeah, but there's gotta be so many girls that hit on you."
"There's some," he shrugged. "Doesn't mean I flirt back."
Your legs were beginning to grow tired from standing, so you walked over to the counter and sat on the edge. You gripped the ledge to keep your balance, swinging your legs back and forth.
Mingyu stood in his same spot, but turned in your direction. He quirked his eyebrows at you. "Are you suggesting that I'm attractive enough to have hundreds of girls swooning over me?" He shot you a teasing grin.
You chuckled and shook your head. "You wish."
Mingyu's jaw dropped in a fake expression of shock as he came closer to you, but he stood to the side to stare at himself in the mirror. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose.
"Since when do you wear glasses?" You inquired.
"Since forever." He replied.
Mingyu placed his hands on the edge of the counter, pushing his weight onto them. The muscles in his arms were prominent through his black shirt. Your eyes dragged across his figure, eventually landing on his face again.
"I like them. They look good." You said.
He glanced at you, his eyes laced with hints of suspicion. "Thanks," he said with his voice a little uneven. He cleared his throat and stood up straight. "Did I help get your mind off him a bit?"
You winced at the mention of Wonwoo, but nodded. "Yeah, you did. Thank you." You exhaled.
Mingyu smiled to himself and his eyes met yours once again. "Good. I feel like it's the least I can do to help."
As you stared at him, you admired his features—his soft, clear complexion and plump lips. You suddenly became aware of how close he was to you; his hand was resting only a few inches away from your thigh. Your mind thought back to how it felt when those hands caressed the bare skin of your body. Impulsively, your thighs pressed together at the revisitation of the memory.
The room felt like it had instantly shot up ten degrees, and the heat left your judgement clouded like a foggy mirror. If Mingyu really was the Devil, his plan was working.
You leaned towards him until your face was only a few inches from his. Your breath caught in your throat as you went to speak.
"I really wanna kiss you right now." You admitted quickly, your eyes focused on his lips.
Mingyu backed away. "Are you drunk?" He asked. His eyes were wide with concern as he scanned you.
You remained where you were, embarrassment creeping up on you as you rapidly shook your head. "I haven't drank anything."
Mingyu chewed on his bottom lip. "I- I don't think it's a good idea. After last time..." he trailed off, glancing up to peek at your reaction. "I don't want you to do something you'll regret again."
"I don't regret it." You blurted before you could stop yourself.
You weren't sure what you were doing or where you wanted to go with this, but you couldn't stop. A feeling of lust had possessed you at this point, controlling your every word and action.
Mingyu looked taken aback at your confession, standing up straighter. His lips were parted in uncertainty, but you watched as his eyes flicked down to look at your lips.
"You don't?" He asked, inching closer to you.
Your heart was beating rapidly in your chest now. You quickly shook your head. "No."
His right hand found a place to rest under your chin, tilting your head up to look at him as his face neared yours. He swiped his thumb over your bottom lip.
"Are you sure?" He whispered.
Desire had overcome you so strongly at this point that you couldn't bring yourself to answer him through words. Instead, you crashed your lips onto his.
Mingyu responded eagerly, his kisses fueled with the same amount of force. Your hands quickly found purchase on the nape of his neck, pulling his body closer to yours. Right as you spread your legs to allow him to stand in between them, Mingyu's tongue darted against your lips, slipping into your mouth when you parted your lips for him.
He placed his left hand on your inner thigh, roughly squeezing the flesh between his fingers as he deepened the kiss. You moaned into his mouth, and he dragged his other hand down to the small of your back to pull you closer to him.
Now your core was pressed against his. Mingyu removed his lips from yours, only to place open-mouthed kisses on the area below your ear. You jerked your hips up as he nibbled lightly on the skin, the friction between your thighs growing.
Your jaw hung open as your arousal increased with each moment; your breathing became heavy while you panted into his ear. He sucked on your collarbone, and a chill shot it's way up your spine. You whimpered loudly and you could feel Mingyu smirk against your skin.
"You sound so pretty," he mumbled, his lips brushing against your skin as he spoke. He lifted his head, his tongue poking out of his cheek while he observed you. Your head was thrown back, eyes half shut, and you were ever so slightly grinding your hips against his for the smallest bit of relief.
Mingyu brought his fingers up to your lips, tapping on the soft skin to catch your attention. "Suck," he said, watching as you obediently parted your lips for him. He shoved two of his fingers into your mouth and pressed them down against your tongue. You could feel wetness building up between your legs. Even though it wasn't anything extreme, Wonwoo never did stuff like this with you in bed. You had to admit, all the new things that Mingyu was introducing to you excited you.
You hummed against him as he stuffed your mouth, almost gagging when his fingers neared the back of your throat. You swirled your tongue around his digits before he quickly pulled them away. You opened your eyes, staring at him in confusion, but his hungry gaze was already locked in on your core. He fumbled with the button of your jeans, and you felt your arousal suddenly spike at the thought of his fingers inside you.
You helped him shuffle your jeans over your ass and down to your knees. He bit his lip as he stared at your clothed heat, his cock stiffening beneath his own jeans, and pressed his dampened fingers to your clit through the fabric of your underwear.
You gasped quietly at the contact, but it wasn't enough. "Mmh, Mingyu," you whined. "Please."
"So needy," he teased with a smirk on his lips. He slipped his fingers beneath the fabric, pressing into your slick folds. His breathing grew heavier. "How're you so wet? I barely even touched you." He breathed against your cheek before he pressed a soft kiss to it. You blushed at his teasing words.
Mingyu rubbed your clit in slow circles, spreading your arousal around your folds. He pressed his lips to yours again, swallowing the moans you were letting out. He dragged his fingers down your heat, teasing your entrance by avoiding it. You clenched around nothing.
"Mingyu, I need you," you muttered against his lips.
"My fingers?" He questioned teasingly, pushing the tips of his digits into your core.
Desire was eating away at you, clouding your thoughts and replacing them with lust-filled ones. You bucked your hips up into his hand, whimpering beneath him.
"No, I want... you." You panted, looking up at him. Embarrassment picked away at you due to your vague request. His eyes appeared even darker than usual as he stared down at you with lust, registering what you were asking for.
Just as he was about to speak, the door knob shook, followed by loud pounding on the door. You jumped, and Mingyu quickly pulled his fingers away from your heat, leaving you with nothing.
"Open up!" A voice called from outside the door. "I have to piss!"
Oh, how wonderful.
You looked to Mingyu with wide eyes, and he motioned for you to stand up. "Pull your pants up!" He shouted at you in a whisper as he wiped his hands on his jeans. He stepped away from the counter, pressing his lips together in frustration as he realized the tent in his pants was painfully obvious.
You pushed yourself off the counter, standing up with shaky legs as you quickly pulled your pants over your hips and re-buttoned them.
The door knob jiggled again. "I'm literally gonna piss myself if you don't open this door in five seconds!" The same voice cried.
"What do we do?" You whispered to Mingyu.
He sighed. "Get out of here as fast as possible and go to my room." Your stomach flipped at the mention of his bedroom; you were really about to go through with this. He reached his hand out for you to grab, and you took hold of it as he led you both to the door.
Mingyu fumbled with the lock, and the door busted open a moment later, revealing a very drunken boy on the other side. He looked both of you up and down. You ducked down slightly, attempting to hide your face behind Mingyu's broad shoulders.
"Fuck, Mingyu? Really? The bathroom?" The boy said with disgust.
Mingyu rolled his eyes, his hand squeezing yours tighter. "Fuck off, Soonyoung." He replied before rushing out of the bathroom with you following close behind.
You couldn't help giggling at Mingyu's comment. He glanced over his shoulder when he noticed you laughing, a smile finding its way to his own lips as he chuckled at you. "Was I too harsh?" He joked.
Mingyu dragged you through the house quickly, and when you reached the bottom of the stairs, he pushed you in front of him to lead the way. You rushed up the steps, and when you neared the top, a sudden smack was delivered to your butt.
You let out a cry, followed by laughter of disbelief. "Mingyu!" You exclaimed with your jaw dropped once you reached the top of the stairs.
Mingyu stood behind you, his hands gripping your waist. He giggled into your ear. "I'm sorry, your ass is so cute." He placed a soft peck to your cheek.
"Let's go," he whispered, his voice suddenly an octave lower. Your stomach twisted, and Mingyu began leading you towards his room with his hands still on your hips.
He let go of you to twist the knob and push the door open, but as soon as you stepped foot into his room, his hands found your waist again and hurriedly pushed you further past the door. He kicked the door closed behind him, pushing you up against the wood. His lips quickly found yours, kissing you with even more intensity than before.
You could barely catch your breath as Mingyu gave you more rough kisses. He was being taken over by lust; he pressed himself against you, allowing you to feel the hardness in his pants. You ran one hand from his shoulder down his chest and stomach, feeling the muscles beneath his shirt tensing at your touch. Finally you palmed him through his jeans and he groaned against your mouth.
"Fuck, you're driving me crazy." He whispered before placing one more messy kiss to your lips. He pulled away to slip his fingers under the hem of your shirt, pulling it over your head quickly and tossing it to the floor. His lips found your neck again, and you moaned as his tongue darted out to lick your sensitive spot. His hands were on your ass, pulling you closer to him and squeezing the soft skin.
Your head rolled back. "Shit, Mingyu," you moaned. "I need you now."
Mingyu pulled away to look down at you with a grin on his face. "Yeah?" He raised his eyebrow. He spanked your ass lightly, causing you to whimper and lean into him. "Go to the bed." He demanded, stepping away from you.
You walked to the bed, trying to swing your hips to hide the nervous wobble in your knees. You felt Mingyu come up behind you, his body pressing against yours. His stiff cock was brushing against your thigh. You turned around, sitting on the edge of the bed as you looked up at him.
"When are you gonna take this off?" You questioned while toying with the fabric of his shirt.
He chewed on his lip as he smirked at you. Without a word, he pulled it over his head, exposing his muscular arms and toned chest. Your eyes dragged hungrily over his torso, drinking in the sight of the outline of his abs.
"Better?" He teased, interrupting your admiring of his body. You looked up at his face. His glasses still rested on his nose, but his hair was slightly disheveled and his lips were now pink and swollen from kissing yours. You were breathless. He was beautiful, and you wanted him so badly.
You perked up from the position you were sitting in, a surge of confidence driven by desire guiding you. "Lie down," you commanded. Mingyu looked taken aback for a moment as he processed your sudden dominance, but he just chuckled and laid down without protest.
Once his back was against the mattress and he was splayed out beneath you, you crawled up towards him, straddling his hips. You dragged your hands down his chest, admiring the softness and warmth of his skin while you began to grind against him.
Mingyu threw his head back as he moaned softly, and you felt yourself clench at the sound. You leaned down, pressing your chest to his as you left kisses on his neck. His hips bucked up into your center. The friction between your bodies was so intense it was driving you insane.
You felt his fingers drag across your spine, causing goosebumps to from across your skin. He fumbled with the clasp of your bra and pulled the straps down your arms. You sat up to fully pull it off and throw it somewhere in the room, and Mingyu quickly brought his hands to your breasts. He squeezed the sensitive buds, twisting your nipples between his fingers. You moaned and pressed your hips into his even harder.
"Ride me," Mingyu mumbled into your ear. Unable to form any words, you nodded, reaching for the button of his jeans.
You lifted yourself off him to help him unzip his pants, and once he started pulling them off you kneeled to the side to discard your own jeans. Just as you began pulling your underwear down your thighs, Mingyu reached for the nightstand next to his bed, shuffling around in the drawer and eventually pulling out a condom.
He pulled his cock out of his boxers, and it stood stiffly against his stomach. He quickly ripped open the package, sliding the latex over his shaft. You straddled his thighs again, about to sink yourself onto him when he quickly grabbed your hips.
"No, no." He said. "Turn around."
You looked at him in confusion. "But-"
"Just trust me," he added, pressing a soft kiss to your chest.
You turned around so your back was facing him, still straddling his thighs. He kept one hand on your waist as the other reached for his cock. He guided the stiff head through your folds, wetting his cock with your arousal. When the tip brushed against your clit you whimpered as you clenched around nothing again.
"Please, Mingyu," you whined.
He dragged the head down to your entrance, finally pushing into you. Both of his hands rested on your hips now as he slowly sunk you down onto him.
You moaned at the slight burning sensation the stretch left behind. It had already been months since a dick was last inside you, and with Mingyu's size it was even more intense.
You aided by lowering yourself onto his cock, and once he bottomed out inside you he stayed still to let you adjust. His dick twitched inside you, and you clenched around him in response.
"You're so fucking tight," he moaned into your ear. He began nibbling and sucking at the skin between your neck and shoulder from behind you, and you whined in response.
You lifted yourself off him slowly, basking in the feeling of his cock rubbing against your walls. You sunk down fully onto him before raising your hips again, finally beginning to ride him.
Mingyu allowed you to work yourself against his length while he brought one hand to your breast again. You moaned loudly as he squeezed the flesh between his fingers and bucked his hips up into you.
"Mmmh, shit, you feel so good," you babbled before crying loudly again. Mingyu quickly brought his other hand up to your throat, lightly choking you.
"Shhh, baby." He whispered against your skin. "You can't be so loud." His words were followed by another soft slap to your ass, making you whine quietly.
He let go of your throat, bringing both of his hands to your waist once again to speed up your pace. He angled his hips so he could thrust up into you at the same time, and the angle caused him to hit your sensitive spot every time. You panted loudly as the pressure in your lower stomach grew, and you ground yourself against his cock, clenching around him.
"Shit." Mingyu choked out breathlessly. "Tight little pussy's taking me so well."
Maybe it was the filthy words that left his mouth, or the way Mingyu took hold of your hips to slow your pace and thrust into you especially hard, but you felt yourself tip over the edge, your mind cloudy as pleasure overtook you. You couldn't even tell if you were crying out loudly, but you assumed so by the way Mingyu suddenly pulled himself out of you and pushed you forward until your face was pressed into the mattress and he was kneeled behind you.
He thrusted into you roughly now, trying to reach his own high. Your eyes were rolling back into your head as your core tingled with oversensitivity, and you could feel yourself drooling onto the sheets.
He came with a particularly rough grunt, pausing his movements as his cum emptied into the condom inside you. He moaned breathlessly and he slowly pumped himself in and out of you to milk his orgasm. Finally, he pulled himself completely out, and his hand ran across your spine.
"You okay?" He asked, and you lifted yourself onto your hands and knees, nodding. Mingyu looked down at your legs, his lips dropping in a slight gasp. "Your thighs are shaking." He noted out loud.
Your face burnt with embarrassment as you kneeled back onto your knees. When you finally turned to look at Mingyu, he was tossing the condom into the trash. His hair was now pressed to his forehead with sweat and his cheeks were tinted a shade of pink. When his eyes met yours, his lips quirked up into a smile.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to get rough with you." He apologized. He sheepishly scratched the back of his neck.
You shook your head. "N-no, it's okay," you croaked out, finally able to formulate words now that all the post-orgasm bliss was fading away.
You didn't know why, but you felt like you had to be near him. You crawled up towards him, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. It felt natural. Comfortable. It reminded you of how you felt with Wonwoo. And despite how much you enjoyed feeling Mingyu's soft lips against yours, that thought terrified you.
"Do you regret this?" He mumbled against your lips.
It scared you—the way you were able to betray Wonwoo so easily. Here you were, in bed with another boy: one that you shared inside jokes with and stole kisses from and ran to for comfort. All that you had built with Wonwoo over the past two years—were some miles apart really enough to tear everything down?
You answered honestly.
"No."
138 notes · View notes
atalho-s · 3 years
Text
Sweet Sugar
3 | Cruel Summer
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pairing: tom holland x reader
warnings: swear words, underage drinking (not much tho, nothing descritive and nothing like “Skins” lmao), suggestive scenes in some chapters, not smut!! but minors be aware. Fluff/angst/drama/ Y/n and Tom being stupid teenagers with feelings.
words: 1.6
a/n: english it's not my first language, Sorry for any mistakes! If you want to be tag on the next chapters, please let me know
Summary: Y/n, Harrison and Tom has always been best friends. Since childhood they’ve always been close, but what happens if after a break up with her first boyfriend, she starts to feel something more about Tom?
PART 3! If you want to read the other parts click here
Don’t forget to check out the playlist by @petesrparker​ created for the series! here
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After a few minutes of crying I felt someone approaching and sitting beside me. I looked up, wiping my eyes, and saw a worried-looking Haz in front of me.
- What happened? Are you okay? I noticed you were missing from the dance floor. - he asked and wrapped one of his arms around me hugging me sideways.
- I’m okay Haz, I think I just got sick, that's all, it must have been the drink.
- Y/n... as you said: I know you from other life, and you didn't even drink much, now tell me, why are you crying? - I hated when he insisted like that, but it was fair, after all he was my brother at heart.
- Haz... I don't want to talk about it, it's so immature I don't even know how to explain it to you, I think it was just something of the moment.
- Did some idiot hurt you? Because I can go back there and...
- No! Nobody did any harm, it's okay... - I said, wiping some tears that insisted on falling.
- Y/n please tell me, I swear I won't tell anyone. You're not one to cry like that...
- I saw Tom kissing Meghan and I felt bad, ok? - I interrupted him, looking at the ground with shame that I had admitted that out loud.
Haz was silent for an infinite number of minutes, processing what I had just said, until he touched my shoulder, I looked at him and I could see the confusion in his eyes.
- Since when do you like Tom that way?
- I don't know the exact date, I just... I started to feel different about him a while after I broke up with Steven... But I think it's just something temporary, you know? Maybe because he is my best friend and treats me well, I ended up having a crush on him, I think that was it, but it will pass, I just need to distract myself with something else...
- Y/n are you sure it's something temporary? Well, I'm your best friend too and you never felt that way about me.
- Yeah, but I always saw you as my brother and Tom as my best friend... I can't explain it, I just know it's different, it always has been, but I'm sure this stronger feeling must be temporary, I just need some time.
- Darling... I'm so sorry. How about we go home? We can watch tv shows and forget about it.
- Are you sure Haz? You were talking to Gracie, I don't want to take you out of the party like that, especially from the side of your other half who I know one day you two will get married, live in a cabin in the woods, have several children and I'll be godmother to them. - I said and Haz laughed and I followed. Laughing after crying is one of the best feelings.
- Damn, you created a whole fanfic. - He said and now I wiped the tears of laughter. - But seriously, we can go, it's already midnight. - He said looking at the watch on his wrist - I'm just going to tell Gracie, so she doesn't think I forget about her and say that you're not feeling well and want to go home, how about that?
- Okay... but only because I'm feeling like crap. - I said pouting and he kissed my head hugging me tight.- I'll be right back, madam.
Haz then got up and went back inside and I took the opportunity to text my mother saying I would be at the Osterfields' house and she sent me an ok.
It took a few minutes and he came back waving for me to join him. I got up, going after him in the parking lot, as he didn’t drink, because he came with his car. We walked in, turning on the radio, and we heard Taylor Swift's Cruel Summer start to play, how ironic.
- Did Tom say something about us leaving? - I asked looking at him.
- No, actually he was busy... but I told Tuwaine and Gracie. - Haz said stopping at the red light.
-Hmm- I sighed trying not to imagine what Tom could be "busy" with. - And Gracie wasn't upset?
- No, I said it was an emergency and she understood. - He smiled in my direction squeezing my hand and I smiled.
- Thank you Haz, I don't know what it would be without you.
- I know, I'm awesome. - He spoke blinking.
- Oh god, I can't even try to say something nice for once. - I said rolling my eyes - But you're really awesome. - and he blew me a kiss in the air and I gave him a laugh shaking my head.
We arrived at Haz's house and Jenna welcomed me with open arms as usual.
We went to Haz's room and I helped him pull up and make the bed besides his own and he gave me a pair of pajamas that I could wear. I went into the bathroom and took off my defeat-smudged makeup and came back lying next to Haz on the top bed as we turned on the tv to a random show that was on. But, of course, we don't pay any attention, because we are talking the whole time.
-... So, Gracie said she liked my eyes a lot, and I didn't know what to do. - He said while we discussed the events of the night, ignoring Tom and company.
- Aww Hazzy, what a cute little cliché. - I said making a melted face. - And you didn't say anything?
- I just said thank you and I said hers were beautiful too, but I got nervous, that's when I realized you were gone and I went after you.
- Wow, I can't believe I ruined this perfect moment.
- Nah, don't even worry, I have all the time in the world, in fact she's from my class, so we still have a lot of opportunity to talk. - he said and I nodded yawning.
- Let's go to sleep? It's almost 3 in the morning. - He said turning off the TV and I gave a thumbs up scratching my eyes.
I jumped down to the bottom bed and covered myself, turning to the other side.
- Haz?
- Yeah?
- If you tell Thomas anything I'll kill you and desert you. - I said listening to him laugh and fell asleep right away.
********************************
The other day I woke up and looked to the side, seeing that Haz was still sleeping. I picked up my cell phone, stretching, and saw that it was almost noon. I got up quietly making sure that I was not making too much noise, went into the bathroom and put on my clothes from the night before. I needed to go home to take a shower and take the rest of that weird night.
I sat next to Haz nudging him until he blinked awake.
- Haz, I'm going, thanks for everything. - I said while he was returning to planet earth little by little.
- Already? Don't you want to have lunch first? - He said sitting on the bed.
- Thanks, but I need to go home, I have some work to finish too, see you tomorrow at school?
- Okay, but if you need anything call me. - He said and I agreed hugging him going towards the door.
- And promise you'll keep your mouth shut?
- I swear, cross my heart. -He said zipping his mouth and I pointed my index finger at him intimidating him.
I went downstairs and thanked Jenna, greeting Charlotte who had already woken up. I said goodbye to them and went out into the sun on a Sunday that I was miraculously doing in London. I walked home, went in, had lunch and went straight to my room, I wanted to stay in alone with my feelings. Was my period coming up? It's not possible that I'm feeling so bad.
I took a shower, changed into comfortable clothes and fell into bed, putting on some sad music to play, closed my eyes, trying to concentrate on the sadness.
A few minutes later I felt my cell phone vibrate with a message coming through.
I unlocked the screen and saw "Tommy 🤓 send you a message" written. I took a deep breath and opened it to look at what he had sent.
Tommy 🤓 says "Hi stranger! Why did you and Haz disappear yesterday? 😭"
Tommy 🤓 says "Tuwaine told me you weren't okay, I tried calling you guys and nothing..."
Tommy 🤓 says "Is everything alright?"
I rolled my eyes reading the messages and at the same time not wanting to respond, but started typing.
Y/N 🌻 says "Everything it’s okay, don’ worry 😊 I think some drink went wrong and I felt a little sick, but nothing to worry about, rlx"
Y/N 🌻 says "The party was great! Too bad I couldn't stay longer..."
I think I was a good liar.
Tommy 🤓 says "Damn it, but I'm glad you're ok, the party was really great! I've already posted the photos on insta. There some really weird ones... 😂"
Y/N 🌻 says "I can imagine 😂"
Tommy 🤓 says "I have a really strong hangover right now, I'm going back to sleep, want to come over later? I want to tell you some things that happened 👀"
Sure Tom, I'm going to your house so you can tell me everything about your wonderful night with Meghan, sure.
Y/N 🌻 says I'd like to, but my stomach's still kind of bad from yesterday 😭 so I'll just stay here, see you tomorrow?"
I told him to avoid him to come at my house.
Tommy 🤓 says "Okay 🥺, take care! See you tomorrow shortie!"
He said and I sent a "😘" blocking the screen. I lay on my stomach and buried my head on the pillow wanting to scream. Tom seemed happy and excited to tell me the "things" from last night, why couldn't I be happy for him? Damn feelings!
I think what I had to do was sleep, eat chocolate, put on a really cliche romantic comedy movie, wait to see if my period would come down (why was I being so dramatic? It could only be that) and pray that monday I would be better.
❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁
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the-blind-geisha · 2 years
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Rules Added to Front Page
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If you want something done right away, you can consider commissioning me. Starting at $10, you can have whatever you'd like written.
Mainly because I feel guilty just answering an ask and saying 'sorry, I can't / won't do that because of (X)'. ♥
I'll post them here too so folks can read up on them:
Please read before submitting anything! This is to help with folks wondering why I didn’t get to their ask or to help cut down on certain types of asks that are a bit overloaded. ♥
Always specify what you want: a small drabble or headcanon. Unless I reblog drabble prompts, drabbles will be at least 700 or less words in length. Sometimes they can be longer if I’ve reblogged something asking for folks to send things in. If nothing is specified, I’ll either choose for you, or I will just answer it as if we’re having a private conversation.
Please, do not list more than one character/ monster for me to write about.
Only send at least one ask. If I've not answered and you don't see it in my Trello after awhile, you're free to send another. But at least give me the grace period of 2 weeks before doing so.
If you need or want something done badly enough, you can commission me, of course. I’ll be more than happy to do whatever you’d like for a fee.
Please note: I will post everything sent to me unless otherwise stated. If you don’t want me to post your comment, question, concern, you can state that in your message. If you’re anon, I’ll have no choice but to post it.
Chances are, if you don’t see your message in my Trello within 24 hours after you sent it, I may have deleted it. If it doesn’t fit anything listed here, it might be I lack the time for it, or I’m too busy to handle the ask / request sent. My apologies.
If you’re not certain if requests of certain types are open, you are more than okay to just ask me. I don’t bite. I promise. ♥
What I will NOT write or answer to: 
Original Character / Canon: I will always accept you guys wanting to talk about your OCs or, if I reblog a ‘talk to my muse’, you’re welcome to come onboard with your OCs and what not to make it more personalized. But I would prefer to keep all OC/Canon stuff reserved strictly for commissions. ♥
Any guilt tripping posts: I understand life is rough, but please don’t use this as leverage to get me to respond to your request. It will be deleted right away.
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giulsherondale · 3 years
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"Welcome Eda!"
Ehm Balca, dear, this is not your home so please don't behave like it is... Ahh my nerves.
And more the earrings tactic... Soo childish. I really can't stand her.
Loved that Eda literally throw the popcorn into Serkan's belly😂
And Sirius at the end, I love my son.
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Honestly... I really love Ferit and Ceren together. They are so cute, and I love how Ferit is trying to correct his mistake. He confesses that he is love with her, that he constantly thinks about her. So sweet.
Serkan telling Eda that the first time they met she used the same tactic of Balca because she forget her bag in his car. I love flirty Serkan and the fact that he remembers everything about Eda and their relationship.
The bet, honestly this is only the pretext so that Serkan can take Eda to Paris and have a romantic moment so the two of them.
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"What does Efe wants?"
"You heard. I said I'll talk to him in the office."
"How strange. Not answering anyone's calls, and doesn't answer questions. But he calls you."
"I still work for him Serkan. Did you forgot? Okay, let's move on to our bet. Perhaps you agree that I won."
"I've told you. Nothing is clear yet."
"What has to happen for you to understand? How much clearer should it be? She ordered the same dish."
"Maybe."
"She said she was interested in the stars."
"Everyone loves stars."
"This was not enough, she also said 'Love' looking into your eyes Serkan."
"I think when she talked about love she was thinking about another person Eda."
"She answered by looking at you."
"Who else Eda? There were two people in front of her. Either you or me. Should she look at the salt shaker?"
"Either you are really stupid, or you pretend not to understand. Okay. It won't last long. It is seen, in a couple of days she will already confess her love to you."
"And you will win the bet right?"
"Of course. It's not my business."
"I agree."
"At the end of the day, what matters is how you respond to Balca's attention."
"You're right. This is a special topic that only concerns me and Balca. This is between us."
"Between you? There is something? Then I will call her."
"Eda sit down please. You..."
"I'm not jealous of you Serkan Bolat."
"You're not jealous... Really?"
"Think for yourself what could have been. Is this funny?"
"Okay... But I'm jealous of you like crazy. What to do about it?"
"You crossed the boundaries again. We'd better have coffee in the office."
"Let's have coffe here."
"I have something important to discuss with Efe. We will have coffee in the office."
"Efe can wait."
"Then I'll send him a message."
"No emoji."
This was hilarious. Eda kicking Serkan under the table and Balca was obviously flirting all the time. I loved Eda expression, she was so jealous. Serkan is soo smart, I think that he is well aware that Balca is flirting with him and he pretend not to see in order to push Eda to near to him. My smart babe.
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Engin and Piril... I really like them. They are opposite of each other but they are so in love. And I think their love is actually more stronger that the difference they have. And they take out the best part of each other.
"As if there is an invisible connection between them."
Balca, dear, believe me there is... There is. So better not to put your nose between Eda and Serkan because nothing will change.
"Your coffee Eda Yildiz. Much better now. When you aren't stressed, you're becoming even more beautiful."
"Don't stress me out then."
"I don't."
This moment was so sweet and romantic. Obviously ruined by Balca. And then when Eda takes his coffee mug I was laughing out loud. Love that my girl is marching HER territory.
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WHAT ARE YOU DOING BALCA?! I think she is really stupid because of course by removing the paper in the dossier Serkan will lose faith in Eda but you're damaging everyone and the holding too. She's so silly. And Balca even said that she felt hurt by seeing Eda and Serkan close the night before... Darling you know him for two days what the hell???? I hate her really.
Soo the interview and the photoshoot aren't enough... Balca you aren't spending too much time alone with Serkan and you even ask him to get a photo together and post it... Balca age 33... Balca real age 10.
"Well, until I'm 100% sure, this bet will continue Eda."
"What else should happen to make you 100% sure? What else? I'm just wondering."
"For example... When she look at me I have to feel that everything inside of her melts... When she's trying not to show her excitement... I have to see it by the way she look away... And when she try to stand firm... I have to see that her heart starts to beat faster... In her breath, in her voice, in her scent, even in her veins... I must feel this love."
"Serkan..."
"When she says my name... I must feel everything inside of her tremble."
TOO MUCH HOTNESS IN THIS SCENE🔥
Serkan reads her like a book... Honestly I don't know what to say about this scene... It speaks for itself. And plus new Serkan is enjoying his life, especially when he has the woman who he's in love with in front of him... Ahh Serkan❤️
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"I really need Serkan"
Sorry Balca maybe I did not understand well... You NEED Serkan? For what? I really don't get her and I think I never will.
"His partner will arrive tomorrow and he wanted me to bring some flowers to his house and get everything in order."
"You went to his house? While I was doing the interview, you were at this man's house?"
"Yes I was. But there was nobody here. So I left some flowers and left. Anything else?"
"What kind of psycho would want flowers in his house? Is he romantic?"
"What's the problem? At least he doesn't have any allergies."
"And I also have another kind of allergy."
"What kind?"
"I'm allergic to Efe. I don't trust him."
"You should trust me. I know what's right and what's wrong."
Ohhh Eda, honey, you don't have an idea how wrong you are... And I love that Serkan says that he's allergic to Efe. My jealous boy.
I really like boys time, I like when Serkan, Engin and Ferit are together. And every each of them have some suspects on Efe,his behavior and the secret partner.
"You won."
"What?"
"You won."
"What did I win?"
"You won the bet."
"What bet?"
"Serkan, you won the bet."
"Ah... Are you sure?"
"I'm sure. Balca is a little in doubt, so it happened. But she may still like you."
"Of course."
"I'm sure about it. You cannot change my opinion. She's just not running after you. As a result you won I lost."
"As a result, then, we are going to have dinner in Paris."
"It seems to me not to worth so many adventures. We can just go to that restaurant with flowers..."
"No no. A bet is a bet. Is it not? Therefore, after the results of the tender are announced tomorrow, we will take my plane and fly to Paris."
"It seems that I have no other choice."
GIVE US EDSER IN PARIS PLEASE✨❤️
During the ice skating scene was like the director told them to do whatever they want, have fun with each other, just be themselves. And I think we saw that, everyone was having fun, was laughing. In fact I really loved the scene it was one of my favorite of the whole episode.
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"What?"
"I haven't laughed like that for a long time. It did me good."
"Me too."
"You keep well on ice."
"Ah yes? I am good in the air, on the ground, on the ice, in the elevators when you're around."
"Stop showing off. And when I'm not there?"
"You are always there. And you always will."
"Maybe tomorrow... Instead of going to Paris, can we eat fish and bread on the water front?"
"I will never agree. We will fly to Paris anyway. Have you ever benn to Paris before?"
"No. If you've noticed, I don't even ask you."
"I went. But to be honest, this is the first time I'm so worried."
"You probably planned everything hourly now. What are we going to do?"
"Yes. We will have a wonderful tourist route. First we will climb the Eiffel Tower, and then visit the best cafes and pastry shops. We will dine in restaurants. And then we will meet the order over the Seine. And then the Bridge of Arts and the Bridge of Lovers. But of course, none of this worries me so much..."
"Yes? What worries you?"
"Get lost with you in Montmartre."
"You won't get lost. You will not be lost anywhere. It seems to me that you even have a map of places where you are going in your head."
"You're right. But I've never been there before."
"Why?"
"Because I gave myself my word. I promised myself that I would go there with the girl that I really love. And it's you."
"Suddenly it got hot..."
Plus we got Serkan saying "Mon amour, je t'aime" and when she said that she understood what he said Serkan throw the ultimate romantic bomb "Because love has no linguage".
THIS IS POETIC CINEMA✨
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Who the hell is Piril father?!😳
He has to be someone really important. He even has the guards.
And the final... Boommm... Grandma has come. I can't wait to see her and her plans.. In the fragment we saw that she will help Balca with Serkan because se has a "future husband" for Eda... Clearly grandma has no idea who Serkan Bolat is, he will never give up on Eda. Moreover I think that grandma arrivals is the thing that will unite Aydan, Ayfer, Eda and Serkan. They will work as a team against grandma. I can't wait to see it.
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kyber-crystal · 4 years
Text
An Accidental Confession
Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader
Words: ~3.1k
Summary: In which you decided to a record a message explaining your feelings for Steve in case you didn't make it out of your mission alive. You don’t have any intention of it actually being heard by him, but you have no other choice to face your fear when it’s accidentally broadcasted across the entire compound.
Warnings: none, this is pure fluff haha with hints of a cocky steve hehe.
A/N: Some dialogue credits go to Descendants of the Sun! (yes, this is a oneshot of a scene from it, bc I love that drama with my whole heart) 
Tags: Dedicating this to @sylvie-writes​ because she’s an absolute SWEETHEART. I LOVE YOU BB. go follow her!
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"Hey, Y/N, check this out!"
You glanced up from where you were furiously typing away at the computer to see Peter with a wide grin on his face. "Hm?"
"Look what I found! Mr. Stark's old speaker set!" The teenager went around to behind the table and rolled out the speaker in front of you. "It was a bit souped up, but all it really needed was some TLC and here it is, good as new!"
"Found this old thing while he was cleaning up," Tony explained, "you wanna hook your phone up and give it a go?"
"Uh...sure, why not," you shrugged, standing up and pushing your seat in, making your way over to the two of them. You took your phone out of your pocket and plugged it in.
"Check, one, two," Peter spoke into the small microphone. "Check one, two, three. Hey! It's working!"
You couldn't help but grin at his enthusiasm. "How old is this thing, anyway?"
"Older than me, that's for sure. Now play something!"
"Alright, alright. Let's see..." you scrolled through your playlists until you found the one you wanted, pressing 'play' and putting it on shuffle. "There."
"Fly Me To The Moon! May played it for me all the time when I was little," Peter exclaimed. "She always insisted I educate myself on older music. Now I'm glad she did."
Bucky and Sam stopped screaming at each other as they battled it out in Mario Kart, quieting down and humming to the beat as they held their controllers tightly. Wanda smiled to herself as she stirred the pot of soup on the stove, Bruce on the verge of falling asleep as he sipped his coffee at the kitchen island and read a news article on his phone. The energy within the compound seemed to lighten significantly as Frank Sinatra's soothing voice echoed off the walls.
You went out to the patio to relax, crossing your arms and closing your eyes as the sounds of chirping crickets and music mixed together in one soothing melody, the moonlight reflecting over the water. For a brief moment in time, you were at peace - and you relished in the temporary feeling of serenity. The 'city that never slept' was sleepy, for once. It wasn't all that late, but you were already beginning to succumb to fatigue's temptations.
But then, the song came to an end and switched off to something else.
"Hey, Steve. I hope this message never finds you because if it does...it means I'm most likely dead-" your all-too familiar voice came over the phone, thick with tears as you struggled to contain your sobs. "God, what am I even doing here? I have a gunshot wound that most likely pierced a vital organ so I'm just gonna bleed out here alone- why am I even doing this? I don't even know how much longer it'll be before you arrive with the evac team...so I just want to apologize in advance for not coming back to you like I promised. If I'd known I'd die in a foreign country, I would've lived a more carefree life instead of constantly worrying, like you always told me to just relax sometimes, I'm so, so sorry-"
Your eyes widened in realization and you rushed across the facility as fast as you could possibly go to the labs.
"Leaving words like this before dying is so uncultured- please, Steve...are you on your way? Please tell me you're on your way. If I'm really dying here I don't wanna die alone. Please hurry...I don't think I can last until you get here. Even so, you'll be the first to find me if I die, that is, if my corpse isn't dragged away or some shit like that - God, this hurts- I almost forgot how much it hurt to get shot...damn...I really underestimated the power of a bullet, huh?
Steve's bandaged fists fell to his sides, the punching bag swinging back and forth so wildly that it would've knocked him over if it weren't for his muscular figure. His brow furrowed in concern and he felt a small ache his chest upon hearing your voice crack - you never cried, and even if you did, which was extremely rare, you were good at hiding it from others.
But then a small smile tugged at the corners of his lips - you did ramble sometimes, and he found it rather adorable. It was, in fact, one of the main reasons why he admired you so much.
"FRIDAY? Where's the source of this audio?"
"It's playing from Mr. Stark's speaker in the lab, Captain," the AI responded.
"Thank you."
He unwrapped the tape from around his hands and exited the training facility, going into a light jog as he headed up to the lounge.
"If I knew that I'd die like this, then I would've told you my true feelings. That I'm in love with you and I really wished you'd kissed me when we were watching that movie together- it was Die Hard, wasn't it? I really wished you'd done something. We were sitting so close, and...I couldn't stop thinking about it. I was tempted to just run my hands through your hair and kiss you. And I almost did. I'm so in love with you, hopelessly in love with you...and if there's anything that scares me more than dying alone, it's probably thinking of a way to tell you, and the fear of being rejected by my best friend, my partner in crime-"
A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips. You were in love with him? He felt his heartbeat pick up speed at the thought. He always held that small bit of hope in his heart that you'd feel the same way.
Just as Steve arrived at the labs, you came bursting through the doors with a look of sheer panic in your eyes, your face drained of all color. You quickly unplugged your phone from the speaker as he watched on in amusement.
"Want some, Mr. Stark?" Peter offered through a mouthful of popcorn, holding the bag out to his mentor. "Seems like we're in for a treat here."
"Where'd you get these, kid?" Tony questioned as he reached over and popped several kernels into his mouth. "Mm. Caramel, a classic."
"I always keep some with me. Never know when drama will break out."
Steve laughed and shook his head as you quickly turned around on your heel and sprinted out of the room. It was so unlike you to act like this - normally you were rather guarded and stoic. To see you as anything but was not only amusing, but adorable in his eyes - it was one of the many things he loved about you, in fact.
"Music...really changes a lot of things," Peter cleared his throat awkwardly.
The super-soldier cracked a smile. "I seem to be in the center of that change."
He said a few quick goodbyes went to find you, as Peter and Tony continued enjoying their popcorn together.
"Oh my god, I'm so stupid, oh my god, why did I even record that damn message," you muttered, finding yourself going back outside again. You needed to clear your head and get away from Steve. The secondhand embarrassment you just knew was waiting for you was almost too much to even think about - what would he think of you now? What would everyone else think of you?
Steve had beaten you to it and was already out there, leaning against the glass railing  with his arms crossed over his chest, wearing an amused expression on his face.
"Oh my god! You scared me!" your voice heightened to a shriek. "What the hell, Rogers? How are you here? Why are you here?"
"I know you like the back of my hand, sweetheart," he chuckled lightly. "You always come out here whenever you're restless or stressed out. Figured you'd try to flee as soon as you heard," he gestured back inside, "all that."
"That was none of your business!" you squeaked. "It was a private message, not meant for you to actually hear! It wasn't for you!"
"Well, you did announce it, publicly," he defended himself, pushing himself away from the railing and raising his hands in surrender. "And it sounded like it was for me. You said my name."
"It wasn't for you!"
"Then why'd you say Steve?"
"It's a different Steve?"
"A different Steve with a stealth suit, Quinjet, and evac team?"
"Y-yeah! B-but it's really funny. Why are you listening to other people's recordings?'
"Like I said, doll," your face flushed at the nickname, "it was broadcasted publicly. I didn't listen, I heard."
"Because you heard it, you carelessly hear it all the way through?"
He smirked. "You know, you're really cute when you're upset." He smirked, taking several steps towards you. You instinctively stepped back. "But why are you running away? When you were about to die you wanted to confess." With each step he took, you took another backwards. "But since you lived, you changed your mind?"
"Confess? That wasn't a confession. That wasn't me."
"This cell phone is yours," he held up your hand that tightly gripped your phone.
"This isn't a phone- Y/N, what the hell are you saying? Stop talking," you cursed yourself under your breath.
"It's an honor knowing I'm in your will," he said kindly.
"If you know then that's enough," you exhaled, stepping around him to leave. Steve stopped you by placing a hand out in front, before moving it to grip your wrist. You felt your skin heat up rapidly under his touch.
You gasped. "Look! Thor set the toaster on fire!"
"I'm not fooled, sweetheart."
You moved to try and leave again, but he only tightened his grip. "Whether or not it was a confession, I'm going to listen to it, so let's not run away, shall we?"
You were silent for several moments before responding, swallowing hard. "Okay. I got it. I'll answer you so let go of me and let's talk. Really."
"Really, right?"
He obeyed, releasing his hand from your wrist. You quickly moved around him and ran back inside. Steve just laughed to himself, shaking his head in disbelief.
"She finally did it," Sam nodded in approval as he and Bucky finished their Rainbow Road deathmatch. "Good game, man."
"Yeah, good game," they shook hands, "but if I'm being honest...I didn't expect things to go down like that. If anything, Steve seems like he'd be the first to confess. The way they're dancing around each other like oblivious monkeys...damn."
"Couldn't have described it better."
...
You flopped onto your bed, panting heavily as you stared up at the ceiling. Your heart was beating so fast that you felt like passing out. Maybe I'll just die like this and I won't ever have to confess for real, you thought. That sounds much better than death by blood loss from a gunshot wound.
"Hey, darling."
You sat up and let out a short scream as you saw Steve leaning against your doorframe, that damn smirk still on his face. "What the hell? You can't just ambush me like that! How long have you been standing there for?"
"Long enough," he chuckled, sliding his hands in his pockets and stepping inside. This time, you were too lazy to push him away, and just allowed him to sit down next to you at the edge of your bed. Steve propped his hand on his chin as he gazed at you, smiling.
You sighed and let your head fall into your hands. "This is all your fault."
"My fault?" Steve tilted his head in confusion. "How is this my fault?"
"Becau- never mind. I'm busy. I gotta go check up on the new lab I'm working on with Bruce."
You stood up abruptly, but he reached out and grabbed your wrist again. "I'm going to go to the labs, too. He asked me to help with a few things. I think you just found yourself an escort."
"I can go by myself, Rogers. I'm an adult," you gave him a pointed look.
"Ouch. That stung," he pretended to look hurt. "Last name calling? I thought we agreed on sappy pet names. And besides, you know what happened last time you went somewhere alone. You got shot."
"Whatever."
"Hold on," he tugged you back so that you had to sit down again. "Why do you keep running away from me? You confess your feelings in your will and then you run."
"It wasn't my will."
"You said you were scared to die alone."
"It wasn't me. Where is your bout of confidence even coming from?"
"I'm not asking how you feel about me at the moment. Don't feel bad that I found out how you feel about me. Because I'm in love with you too, and nothing can change the fact that I like you even more now."
You swallowed hard.
He smiled again. "And you look beautiful today, doll."
"Stop with the pet names," you mumbled. You couldn't stop the tremor in your tone as you spoke
"Hey hey hey, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" Steve brought a hand up to your face, lightly skimming the tip of his thumb across your cheekbone to wipe away the tears that had fallen. "Hey. Tell me what's wrong, darling."
As soon as that last word left his lips, you lost it. A broken sob escaped from your mouth before you broke down, and he felt guilt settle in the pit of his stomach. Sure, he was lightly teasing you - but he didn't intend for his jabs to hurt you in any way. That was the last thing he wanted to do - to see you cry. He hated seeing you cry.
"Oh, God, I'm so sorry," he whispered, carefully wrapping his arms around you and pulling you to him, rubbing circles onto your back. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have taken the teasing so far. I'm so sorry, Y/N-"
It took nearly twenty minutes for your sniffles to die down and another ten for your crying to stop completely, but he patiently held you until you did. And when it finally stopped, it still took you several moments before you could bring yourself to meet his eyes.
"I look like a mess," you muttered, quickly ducking your head down to wipe at your nose. "I'm sorry you had to see me like this-"
"You look lovely, regardless," Steve murmured, kissing your forehead. "You'll always look beautiful in my eyes."
"You're such a sap," you mumbled, closing your eyes. "I hate you."
"You know you love me, Y/N."
"No I don't."
"That message told me otherwise. You sounded like you were pretty in love, judging by the desperate tone in your voice-"
"Shut up!"
"Make me," he challenged, a smirk appearing on his face.
You huffed and stood up, crossing your arms. "You're a pain in the ass, you know that, Rogers?"
"Watch your language-"
"Make me."
"Using my own words against me, are you?" Steve raised a brow as he stood up as well, walking towards you. You kept walking backwards until you felt your back hit the wall and internally panicked when you realized there was nowhere else to go.
"Shit," you whispered. "I'm not escaping this one, am I?"
"Not a chance," he chuckled wistfully. You felt your heart do somersaults and your stomach twist itself into knots as he met your eyes, a softened look to them that you'd never seen before - what was it? Just a few minutes earlier you'd find yourself squirming beneath his intense gaze but for some reason, you stayed put.
When his lips pressed against yours, you felt a crackle of electricity across your skin and the world fell away. It seemed as if time stopped and held its breath as it watched the two of you, his arm curving around your waist as his free hand rested at the back of your neck, pulling you flush against him. Though you were taken aback by the sudden gesture and terrified you wasted no time in reacting, sinking deeper into the kiss. You could feel him smile against your lips and fireworks exploded inside your chest - if there was a way to describe pure magic, this would definitely be it. And he felt it too - and he swore to himself that he'd never felt a bigger rush of adrenaline before until now.
You looked absolutely stunning to him in that moment as you pulled apart - with your half-closed eyes, reddened cheeks, and swollen lips - his doing, no doubt. Your gaze slipped down to his equally swollen lips and you felt your face flush at the sight. Steve was quick to catch what you were doing and pulled you back in for more.
This time, it wasn't as innocent and quick. It was more needy, passionate - months, no, years of pent-up frustration he didn't even know he had seeping into it. Years of not being able to tell you finally being poured out into one grand gesture - years of finally getting closure because he now knew the girl he'd loved for as long as he could remember felt the same way.
"Oh my fucking shit."
The two of you were practically gasping for air as you broke apart a second time to see a smug-looking Sam.
"You just- I didn't interrupted something between y'all, did I?" Sam cocked a brow. "Looked like you were this close to-"
"No," you exhaled, "we weren't."
"I'm a GENIUS for fixing that speaker! If I hadn't done so you guys never would've gotten together!" Peter squealed as he appeared by the Falcon's side. "I believe a thank you is in order!"
"I hope my timing isn't bad, but I have to ask," Steve cleared his throat and looked you straight in the eye. "that was a confession, right? And you didn't do it just because you felt compelled to. Be honest with me."
You let out a sigh of defeat. "Yeah...it was."
He broke into a gorgeous, million-dollar grin that made you weak at the knees. He leaned down, lips ghosting over yours as if he was going to kiss you again - but pulled back, much to your disappointment.
"I guess I'm the victor of this battle, huh," he whispered before releasing his hold on you and walking out, leaving you to stand there utterly shell-shocked and speechless as Peter and Sam began teasing you.
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willddheartt · 3 years
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26 Days | Wilbur Soot
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30 days to fall in love with someone? Sounds easy right? It would be if that person wasn’t so unbelievably annoying in almost every sense.
You’re not sure how you found yourself in this situation, but you were positive there was no backing out now…
Series Warnings: Mostly fluff and angst, and a very poorly constructed enemies to lovers plot.
Word Count: 2264
Masterlist Series Masterlist
26 Days
God, you hated him so much! You wanted to scream it from the top of a building how much you truly hated Wilbur. But you couldn’t
Lately, no matter what you did or said on stream, he always had a problem with it. You had been streaming Minecraft together, on the SMP. You were just messing around, no lore this time. You suggested you made a house together in L’manburg, no matter what you did, the two of you couldn't agree on a material, you wanted to build it out of birch wood and cobblestone but he insisted on dark oak logs and spruce planks would look better together. You gave up and let him have what he wanted because he was so persistent and you knew had it gone on you would have blown up on him in front of all your viewers, and that’s the last thing you needed right now. 
You were up late, last night, planning out when you were going to meet up, and just a few hours ago the two of you got along perfectly. Laughing over the phone as you were laying in bed, chatting mindlessly. You wondered what happened between then and now.  You and Will planned to meet up in the middle of next week, you were going to drive down to see him and stay at his place. Although you brought up getting a hotel room, Wilbur insisted you stay with him, too tired to resist you agreed, but now you're starting to think maybe getting a hotel room might be for the best. 
You and Wilbur ended your streams at the same time, and you sighed as soon as you were sure it was off. 
“What?” Wil asked, still in the voice chat.  “What was that back there? Why the hell are you so disagreeable?” You let out.  Will scoffed, “Me? You’re the one who kept on insisting birch and cobble when that wouldn't even fit in L’manburg!”  “Jesus Christ,” You sighed, leaning back in your chair and running your hands down your face. “How in the hell are we going to get through this month?”  “Maybe you should stop being so uptight and argumentative.” Wil shot  “Fuck you,” You mumbled before clicking out of the chat and leaving your PC. 
You needed to get out of the house and away from any form of contact you had with Wilbur and social media. You had been cooped up inside your apartment for close to a week at this point, maybe some fresh air would do you good.  You grabbed a jacket and keys before leaving the apartment, leaving your phone charging on your desk. You didn’t want to bring it with you because you didn't even want to think about getting a text or any kind of notification from Wilbur right now, you knew you would have blown up at him completely. 
The weather was just beginning to turn nice, the air was warm but the wind still had a slight winter chill to it, although all the snow was long gone Jack Frost still made his lurking presence known.  Buildings lined the walls of a small square common area where teens mostly hung out after school and on weekends. The square had a fountain in the middle of it, the water had been shut off for the winter but with the warm temperatures from the last month, it had recently been turned back on.  You sat on the ledge of the brick wall around the bottom pool for the fountain, looking at everyone passing through on this nice Wednesday evening. Older couples out for an evening walk, middle-aged business people speed walking their way home from the office, teens scattering the open area, sitting on blankets and laughing in their small groups of friends. You found watching people be interesting, it made you think. 
We are all living our own lives at the same time and most of us on this small planet don't even know of one another, or if you know of them you don't know them, you only know their name. It's weird how that works.  It's astounding to think about though, what are the chances of meeting exactly who you did, at the time you did, and what a gamble it is for them to stick around. 
You had been sitting on the fountain for close to five minutes and when the wind had just started to pick up, sending a slight shiver down your spine.  Your mind was clearer now and you were no longer angry with Wilbur, it was stupid what you fought about and as much as it pained you to admit, he was right.  You were being stubborn and didn’t take into account the surrounding aesthetic of the area. It was your fault that the disagreement broke out in the first place. 
You got home and saw your phone had been basically blown up by notifications from Wilbur, asking if you were really mad at him or if it was for a bit that you took too far, but when you didn't answer he slightly snapped you, asking if you were okay and where you were.  You answered immediately, scared he might have been worrying.
Hey! You typed, Sorry I went for a walk after stream, needed to get out. 
There you are! He responded within seconds, I got worried. 
I’m okay, I left my  phone home, needed a break from the internet and things. You know? 
You mean you needed a break from me? 
You could have sworn, had you been on a video chat with him you would have seen him frowning. You weren't sure what about that message got you, but you found yourself almost with tears in your eyes, you didn't mean to hurt him and you hoped you didn't -what were you talking about. Wilbur didn't mean anything to you, he was just someone you kept in contact with because you were in the same friend group. 
No, you typed, not the whole thing at least. I just needed to clear my head, and i'm sorry for being such a dick on stream, I didn't mean to cause that, and you were right about the blocks. 
You sighed when hitting the send button, never in a million years did you think you would be telling Wilbur, The Wilbur Soot, that he was right about something. I’m sorry. 
Christ Y/N it’s alright, really. Just don't scare me like that again, I was starting to think something bad happened to you. 
I didn't mean to scare you, Wil. 
You found yourself feeling bad about leaving him in the dark while you were out, you didn't mean to worry him, you just didn't want to hurt him by blowing up at him. 
Still call tonight, yeah? He messaged 
You nodded, even though he couldn't see you. Yeah, I'd like that very much. I'll call you before I go to sleep. 
In the time that you had been a fake couple, you and Will had started calling while you were getting ready to fall asleep in bed, you usually ended up falling asleep before he did, the sound of his raspy sleepy voice lulled you to sleep like there was no tomorrow. You'd wake up in the morning to find that Wil left the call going, you thought it was cute. Sure it might have been some highschool relationship stuff but it was cute nonetheless. 
-
“Hello, Y/N” Will said through the phone, his voice sounding tired and soft  “Hi Wil,” You smiled, giggling slightly. Although you had just been on a voice chat with him earlier you loved hearing his voice when he was tired, it sounded like stirring honey into your morning cup of tea, or reading an old book, but specifically an old book that smells of must and age of being stored at the back of your grandparents bookshelf that hadn't been touched in years.  “You sound tired,” you mumbled, laying down with the phone resting on your stomach as you looked up at the ceiling.  “I am,” He hummed, “You don't sound very tired though, did you drink a lot of coffee today?” He asked  “A little more than usual, but I’ll be fine.” You sighed, your voice almost coming out in a whisper. There was something about talking to Wilbur before going to sleep that made you feel soft and loved, but you couldn't put your finger on exactly what it was. Maybe it was the thought of having someone there, or maybe it was just as simple as it was Wilbur and it was you.  
“Are you excited for next week?” He asked  “Right now it feels too far away to be real,”  “Who’s talking here, is it you you or is it us you?” He asked, unsure if your thoughts were good or bad “Its both,” You said. “It feels so far away to me right now, but so close at the same time and a side of me cant wait for it to get here, so we can finally meet in person. But another side of me feels like it’s good that it feels so far away because maybe something will come up and I wont be able to make it and i don’t want to think that or even say it because thats a terrible thing to say but you know how it is.” You rambled, trying your best to explain it to him in a way that he would fully understand the crossroads your mind is at, and not sound like a dick while doing it. 
Although you couldn’t see it, you could tell he was nodding along. “How about we make a deal, alright?” He started, “In these night chats, we don’t have to put on the face of the characters we play on stream and through out the day, Alright?”  You rolled over to your side, putting an arm under your head and setting your phone on the mattress by your head. “I like that. Deal.”  “Okay now tell me how you really feel about all of this” 
All the thoughts ran though your head a mile a minute, you didn’t know where to start honestly, you had a lot of thoughts but if you really looked at it and narrowed it down most of them talked circles around the same thing just using different words. 
“You promise what ever I say wont hurt you or make you flip out?” You asked  “Swear on Tommy’s life.” You could sense the smirk that tugged at the side of his mouth when he said that. “Okay,” You started with a sigh. “So I din’t really know where I stand on it anymore, at the beginning I thought this was going to be insufferable, but now that we’ve gotten into it for a few days, you’re really not that bad, but I’m still on the fence.”  “I hope come meeting, your opinion has changed a little bit more. But I do understand where you’re coming from. Its weird being able to talk off stream and such with you and not be fighting twenty-four-seven. It’s nice, I feel like I’m getting to know you better.” 
He was right, you had told Wilbur more in the last five days than you had ever in your years of knowing him. You were surprised to find out that he’s actually not as bad as you thought, but you would never tell him that bit. 
“Do you have to put on a character when we do those streams and such, Wilbur?” You asked, 
“I don’t think I do, and if I do it I don’t know what I’m doing it. It’s just something thats easy to do, I’m not sure how to explain it.” He replied “Do you have to when we’re talking like this?”  “No. Not at all, this is 100% me.” 
You’re not sure what part hit you the most, when he said he didn’t have to put on a full character mask when showing your ‘relationship’ to the public, or if this Wilbur, the tired one was the real Wilbur who you've been falling asleep with for the past three nights. You weren’t sure what you though you wanted to hear when asking him that but it definitely wasn't what you go, but maybe it was what you needed. 
The line went dead for a couple of minutes, you had the radio playing softly in the background to help you sleep better, and Wilbur seemed to be enjoying listening to you breathe through the phone.
“Hey Wil,” You yawned  “HM?” He hummed, you could tell he had his eyes closed with the phone by his face, like he did on one of your face time calls the other day.  “I’m soon gonna pass-out,” You whispered  “Thats alright, go to sleep. Get your rest, I’ll be here when you wake up, love.” He was so sweet it almost made your heart hurt.  “Okay” You nodded, but don’t hang up, okay? I like it when you’re here with me when I fall asleep.” 
You struggled to keep your eyelids open, feeling heavy and light all at the same time. You felt so light it was as if you could float away but you were too heavy and weighed down to get up and move, even if you absolutely had to move for whatever reason you don't think you could have. 
“Goodnight Wilbur, love you.” You mumbled into your pillow  “Sweet dreams.” 
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wkemeup · 3 years
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Hi kas, i hate to ask but i need advice and when i browse your page your advice always seems so amazing! Sorry in advance if this is long, i noticed that your advice is usually much better when there are more explanations in the asks because you dont have to guess abt much. Also sorry if it seems not important but its eating away at me.
So, I'm an 18 turning 19 year old female with major attachment issues.
I spent a lot of this summer around my university campus and during the last 2-3 weeksof break, i noticed this boy i hadnt recognized was starting to be around a lot too.
Flash forward to when school starts, I've both befriended this man - let's call him Joe - and gotten his number. We've talked occasionally, not too much and we' ve called only twice. The first was to help Joe run lines for the drama club he's in and the second was supposed to be just to chat, one on one, but he ended up adding a few other people I've seen around school before that I suppose he's met.
Now the other night I was having a breakdown, and with my strong attatchment and trust in him (for no reason, might i add) I sent him something asking for advice. It wasn't a big deal or very dramatic, I'd simply asked Joe how to tell a friend that you're not as good as they think you are and how to keep a friend that moved somewhere that you can't visit. I also admitted worrying that he hated me, feeling that I'd messed up somehow.
He actually had some great advice for me and confirmed that he didn't hate me, but also putting in that our relationship will most likely end soon because we don't know each other very well, we won't be able to meet up often (his father is a professor and he was only visiting to see family), and he doesn't see a point in keeping up a relationship with someone he doesn't know all that well and won't really have to oppurtunity too.
I thanked Joe for the advice and then asked him if there is anyway i can change his mind about ending our relationship so soon, promising that I'll open up the more time we spend together and that calling is always an option I'm up for.
He said yes, but he wasn't sure because it's his first year of university and he might be busy. He then offered to chat the next day, since it's right before school starts and he'll have time.
So we scheduled a call and I was happy. Except today when I called and texted him to ask if he was ready or needed to reschedule, he ignored me. When I checked back a little while later, I see that he read my messages around an hour after I sent them, but no reply.
Now I'm tempted to ask him if he's sure he's okay with continuing this relationship, because I'm scared he said yes only to spare my feelings. But then why would he have offered to call the next day if he didn't really want to be friends any more? And his reply seemed so genuine, with that enthusiasm and happiness that was so Joe.
I'm at a loss of what to do and my therapist is busy for the next few weeks. Should I send it? Just ignore him until he does anything to reach out? Or give up hope altogether?
As for why he agreed to still be friends and talk the next day, but ignored you... we can't read minds so we can't know for sure exactly what is going through his head. I will say that you're both young and it's possible he just doesn't have the maturity or communication skills to be able to say that he's not interested in moving forward. He could also have been busy? But the fact that he clearly read the messages and chose not to respond, could also mean that he's ghosting you. Which is a shitty thing to do, but it happens to the best of us. It says more about him than it does about you.
I'm sorry this happened, because it's obviously upsetting for you. But as you said, you have an attachment and trust in him ("for no reason"), so maybe this isn't about Joe himself at all. And rather, just about validation and friendship at baseline. We can't control how other people react or what they do or say. We can only control our own reactions.
He knows where you stand on this. That you want to remain friends/continue the relationship. The ball is in his court and whether he chooses to reach back out or not is on him. Again - it's not a reflection of you. Sometimes people come and go from our lives and there's no fault or blame.
Try using soothing self talk, breathing skills, or whatever skills you usually talk about with your therapist. Remind yourself that you can't control his behaviors or what he wants, and that you are a perfectly whole and valid person whether he reaches back out or not.
Hope that helps!
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