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samkerrworshipper · 7 months

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found family | arsenal women x reader

no warnings just sickness, comfort and a little bit of angst

blurb: when r decides it’s a good idea to go out in the snow for the first time after training they suffer the consequences, and then suffer the consequences of trying to conceal their sickness

sorry if this draws on, wanted to give y’all something so this is from the drafts lol and idk how i feel about it

Doing snow angels after training in nothing more than shirts and shorts was never going to be a good idea, but I’d done it anyway. Me, Katie, Caitlin, Alessia and Beth having snuck out without telling any of our other teammates to have a moment in the snow. It was some harmless fun that we were sure our coaches and captains wouldn’t approve of, so we’d snuck out of the recovery room without anybody taking notice and had some fun in the snow. We hadn’t been out in it for much longer than 20 minutes, just long enough to slip out and in. It was rare for there to be so much snow so early in the year, I had hardly been expecting it and it wasn’t the normal sludge that North London was renowned for, it was proper fluffy white snow, the stuff you see in hallmark movies. I was the only player on the team who had never seen real snow before, so when I’d pleaded with Katie to take me out in it, she could hardly say no to me.

Beth, Caitlin and Alessia had just been casualties. Katie had taken Lessi under her wing since her start at Arsenal, the two had very quickly become bonded and there wasn’t much you could do with Katie anymore without Alessia and Caitlin being her companions.

Beth and Viv had happened to overhear our conversation in recovery and Beth had pleaded with us to let her come, Viv just shook her head at us, clearly in disapproval of our decisions but also not bothering herself with trying to stop us, there wasn’t any point, she wouldn’t win.

So we’d somehow managed to sneak out of the recovery rooms and out onto the spare field, which was covered in a blanket of white snow. Almost immediately I’d thrown myself down into the powder, shivering slightly at the coldness but not really caring, it was an experience that felt so incredibly surreal that I was in complete ignorance over my senses.

The four other women just sat and watched as I rolled around in the snow, Katie and Beth shaking their heads at my antics. Alessia busied herself with getting in a snowball fight with Caitlin. It had stayed fairly tame until I’d thrown one at Katie’s head and then it had turned into a full on war, ending with Katie and I wrestling in the snow.

Our snow escapades had ended with Beth forcing me out of the snow and into a jacket, I was shivering all ready but I didn’t care, my heart felt mended in a way that was inexplicably perfect.

I’d been forced into a hot shower by Katie, her overbearing motherly tendencies also making Alessia and Caitlin join me. Beth had been the only one to not enter the snow so she’d slipped her way into the dinner room whilst us other girls had been busy warming our bodies back up. Caitlin and Alessia were fairly quick, but I took a little bit longer, my body still shivering even as I exited the shower to throw on some sweats.

Katie’s furrowed brow was enough to tell me that she was a little worried about the fact that I was still shivering and cold, but she didn’t vocalise her worries, instead opting to rush me and the other girls into the dinner room. Somehow our absence had gone unnoticed, something that I was shocked by because we were hardly the quiet crew of the group.

I’d slid into a seat across from Viv and beside Steph, my body still a quivering mess. Viv’s eyeroll was enough of an ‘I told you so’, the older dutch woman clearly disapproving of our decisions. I tucked into my dinner, pesto pasta with chicken and garlic bread. It didn’t take long for Steph, my fellow Matilda to notice my shivering body. My fingers struggling every once in a while to hold my fork still.

“Little bit cold, y/n/n?”

I smirked and chuckled at the light implication from Steph, trying my very hardest to not give away the intense chills that were wracking my body, I was sure they would fade eventually.

“Just not fully used to this London weather I suppose, had someone warned me it was going to be so cold I think I would have stayed in Perth.”

Steph nodded at me knowingly, before returning to her conversation she’d been having with Beth, leaving me face to face with Viv, who had worry weaved between her brows as she studied me. Beth and Viv had just been two of the people who had taken me under their wing since my arrival at the Arsenal. Viv especially, although she’d never admit it, had particularly gone out of her way to look after me. On top of the two captains, Leah and Kim who had practically adopted me as soon as I’d walked through the doors. Leah was harder on me then anyone else, considering she was also a mentor to me on the defensive side of the pitch, so when she’d taken me under her wing I’d been a little bit terrified. She was always on my ass, I was always the first person in trouble with her and the first person to be blamed for anything. I was also the youngest on the team, and my personality was loud and bubbly, something that didn’t assist in helping me keep my head down around the team.

It was one of the reasons Beth and I got on famously, the both of us always looking to cause a little bit of mayhem but most of all have fun, Katie normally getting caught up in our antics considering she was the team's designated prankster.

Right now though, I felt anything but bubbly, my head beginning to pound against my trembling form as I pushed the pasta around my bowl, no longer feeling the overwhelming hunger I’d left a few minutes ago.

It was the clambering of a teammate sitting down beside me that pulled me from my daze, dropping my fork on the bowl as I turned to see who was sitting next to me.

“Hey lover girl.”

Kyra’s hand found it’s way to my head, ruffling my hair, her hand retracting back quickly though as soon as she made contact with my scalp, her eyebrows furrowing into a similar expression to what Viv had given me a few minutes ago when I’d been caught out by her.

“Why’s your head so cold? Feels like you’ve just come out of the ice baths.”

Kyra’s voice was nothing but friendly, but with the mixture of my sudden headache and my annoyance over people telling me that I was cold I couldn’t help but give her a bitten back response.

“I’m fine, just leave me the fuck alone.”

Kyra visibly flinched back at my words and everyone around us went quiet fairly quickly, everyone sensing the sudden tension and confrontation occurring between me and my teammate. Kyra slid into the seat beside me, one of her hands falling to my thigh which I immediately flinched away from.

“Everything okay, sweetie?”

I moved myself away from Kyra, inching myself further towards Steph, my other national teammate who seemed as equally confused by my behaviour as Kyra was.

“Y/n, a word?”

It was the voice from the other end of the table that captured my attention, Leah standing from the table already, clearly having detected the awkwardness between Kyra and I.

I clambered my way from my seat, scuffing my feet against the carpeted floor of the dining room as I tagged along behind Leah, following her out of the room and out into the corridor. I flicked the hood of my jumper over my head, toying with the drawstring as Leah turned to face me as soon as we were out of earshot from the group.

“What was that about?”

Her facial expression was as stern as ever as she looked at me, I kept my eyes on my feet, my head fucking hurt and I was still shivering, it was less noticeable though as I stood, I kept my hands out of sight and tried my very hardest to keep my body still.

“She was pissing me off.”

I could hear Leah frowning from in front of me, I didn’t need to look at her face to sense it.

“Does her pissing you off make it okay to tell her to fuck off, because I would hardly say that she deserved that, what’s up? This whole attitude is hardly normal for you.”

I kept my eyes focused on my shoes, toying with a bit of fluff that was stuck on the carpet, edging it slowly across the material with my shoed foot.

“Nothing’s up, I’m fine.”

Leah’s arm grabbing for my sleeve covered hand hadn’t been what I was accepting, the action drawing my eyes up to meet her own.

“I won’t have this piss poor attitude, go home, get some sleep and be here with a fresh mind tomorrow morning, understood?”

I pulled my hand from Leah’s, not letting her hold on to mine long enough to feel the tremors coursing across my skin.

“Aye, Aye, captain.”

I rolled my eyes at Leah, fake saluting her as I walked back into the dining room, picking my keys and phone up from the table quickly before exiting the building, not leaving any room to ask any questions as I stormed out of the room.

I somehow made it back to my apartment without passing out at the wheel, a miracle if you asked me. I didn’t have the will to do anything besides fall straight into my bed, very quickly changing into a pair of flannel pyjamas and stacking a pile of blankets on top of my sheets before climbing into the bed and relaxing into the mix of blankets, the mixture of heat and darkness calming my symptoms just enough to lull me into a fever induced sleep.

I woke up multiple times during the night, vomiting, coughing, sweats, chills, it all. My sleep was restless and by the time my alarms were going off I felt worse than ever. I was supposed to be at training by 9, but I could hardly manage to get out of bed to get to the toilet, let alone even attempt to try and put my training gear on and run around on a football pitch for three hours. I let my phone snooze one last time before flicking a text to Jonas, telling him that I was feeling a little bit under the weather and was just going to take the day to recuperate, all though something in my gut told me that one day wouldn’t be enough, not with the croaky cough that was wracking my whole body and the fever that I knew I was running. It was winter in London, I’d probably just picked up a 48 hour bug.

Jonas replied fairly quickly, telling me that he hoped I felt better and that it was a good idea to take a rest day.

With that text I turned off all of my alarms and burrowed back into my blanket fort, the effort of even having to look at my phone and piece together a text being too much for my head. My whole body hurt, my chest and ribs hurting every single time I took a breath, let alone coughed. The chills from yesterday were yet to pass, my whole body feeling like I was still out lying in the snow, even though I knew in reality my whole body was overheating. That thought still didn’t stop me from piling more blankets on top of my body, settling back into my bed with a groan as a wave of nausea and pain washed over me.

I faded in and out of the day, similarly to as I had done at night, my fever induced state making even my conscious moments feel like a dream. I ignored the incessant sound of my phone buzzing on my bedside table, opting to ignore anybody or anything that was popping up on it, I had one job in North London, play football, and I’d alerted my coach so that was as far as my social correspondence needed to go, any teammates or friends who decided my life was their business didn’t matter to me right now, my body hurt to much to care.

Somewhere around 5 or 6 the incessant coughing came to be too much for my body and I found my body keeled over the toilet bowl, dry heaving as I coughed up the mucus and phlegm that was caught up in my lungs. It was a painful experience, my lungs burning with every single breath that left my body, the oxygen burning on its way in.

I dragged myself back to my bed once I was done, the sun just beginning to set and my body having the capacity to do nothing more than lie down in my bed and wait for darkness to come so I could go back to sleep, tomorrow was our day off, so at least I didn’t have to worry about explaining another absence to Jonas.

My sleep through the night was even worse than the previous day, probably credited to the lack of energy I had in my body. The pain in my chest worsening drastically and in the wee hours of the morning I dragged a blanket and pillow into my ensuite, coming to the realisation that I didn’t have the energy to walk back and forth from the bathroom every time I had to go to the bathroom, which was fairly frequent with the amount of shit I was coughing up. I contemplated calling a teammate or Sam, whose apartment was fairly close to mine and I trusted her enough to ask her to come over. I didn’t though, opting to fall asleep on my toilet seat instead of getting up to go fetch my phone.

I stayed like that for most of the night, I think, honestly somewhere along in the night it all blurred into one. Until I was awoken brutally at 8am by the sound of pounding on my apartment door. I ignored it, half not believing that the sound was real and that it was just the sound of my fucking skull pounding against my brain in my head, a reflection of how my head had felt for the past 24 hours.

The knocking only grew louder and more persistent though, until it finally ceased and not much longer than 30 seconds later I was face to face with my two arsenal captains, both of their faces pink and rosy from the London cold and slightly exasperated.

“Hey skippers.”

My voice was laced with delirium, the only thing keeping me conscious at that point.

“Hey Joey, how you feeling?”

Leah walked cautiously towards me, letting Kim do the talking whilst she approached me and pressed the back of her palm to my forehead, grimacing almost immediately as her hand made contact with my own skin. I leant into the contact, her hand a relief from the fluctuating temperature my body had been upholding.

“Fuck, she’s burning up.”

Leah’s accent was thicker than normal, her voice covered in a blanket of concern that I’d never heard before.

“I’ll get Katie and Viv to come up, they can help get her into the car, we’ll have to take her to A&E, it’s bloody impossible to get an appointment with a doctor at this time of year.”

I shook my head at Kim almost immediately, or shook it as much as I could with the headache I had.

“M’ fine, just a 48 hour bug.”

My voice made me sound so much smaller, like I was a six year old and it was doing absolutely nothing to get my point across, in contradiction probably making my argument far weaker.

“Viv told us about you playing in the snow. What were you thinking? Playing in the snow with no clothes on after training, different breed you aussies.”

Kim mused at me, smiling a little bit as she watched Leah hurry around my bathroom, searching around. I frowned guiltily, knowing that once I felt better, once this was all over I’d be on the receiving end of a rather lengthy lecture about not endangering myself, a lecture I was sure Beth and Katie would have already received, considering Viv had snitched on us.

“I’m fine, I feel fine.”

My words were followed up by a fit of coughs that had me leaning back over the bowl of the toilet coughing up more phlegm, hardly a convincing point. My cough was dry, from the lack of fluids I’d consumed and the lack of liquids that were left in my body from the vomiting. My throat completely raw from the continuous retching.

“Don’t sound fine, sweetheart.”

Kim’s words were paused by Leah exclaiming as she located my first aid kit, that the two of them had put in my apartment when I’d moved in, claiming I was far too clumsy to not have one. She pulled out a thermometer almost immediately.

“I’ll make you a deal sweetheart, if you are below 38 then we’ll stay here. Me and Leah will look after you, like we could have yesterday if you had called us, or anyone. If you are above 38 though then we have to go to the hospital, because we don’t want you getting seriously sick, I know it sucks but we have to keep you safe sweetie. Kerr would have my neck if I didn’t return her best defender back in perfect condition when the international break rolls around, understood?”

I frowned at Kim, her stern scottish accent leaving no room for argument. I opened my mouth up to Leah, letting her slip the piece of metal into my dry and inflamed mouth. Waiting patiently until it beeped and frowning almost as soon as she saw it.

“41.”

Fuck. That number even made me frown a little bit, because that was unsafely high and all of us knew it. It explained all of my symptoms, and the cloud that I’d been floating on for the last day, a fever induced high that was the cause of my incessant sweating and shakes.

Kim frowned down at me, I shrugged at her in defeat, both of us knowing what it meant.

“C’mon sweet, let's get you changed and in the car.”

I looked up at Leah, my body folding in defeat as she bent down to lift me from the floor. I immediately wrapped my arms around her, letting her carry me back into my bedroom. She made quick work of changing me out of my pyjamas into a plain grey pair of sweatpants and an arsenal hoodie, giving me a peck to the forehead once she was done getting me changed. Her lips, cold from the London air felt so good on my burning skin, relaxing the itching and searing sensation that had covered every surface of my skin.

“Kim?”

Kim had busied herself with collecting a bag of my belongings, chargers, electronics, a change of clothes, and my toiletries. I had pretty much gone limp in Leah’s arms, letting her brush through my hair and comb it into a plait at the back of my head. The vice captain whispering sweet nothings in my ear as I groaned and coughed, my body tired from the constant pain.

“Yes, Joey?”

She took a pause in her hunt for my things, turning to face me, one of her eyebrows quirked at me in questioning. .

“Do you think you could text Sammy for me, please, and maybe Macca, I don’t want them to worry about me.”

My voice was so quiet I wasn’t even sure she’d heard it. The worry was growing on me though, the realisation that I really wasn’t as well as I’d been telling myself and Sam would want to be the first person called. Kim gave me a little smile before nodding and getting back to her job, collecting the last of my things just as I heard my front door open again.

“Of course I can sweet, let’s just get you in the car and then we can text whoever you need, alright?”

I heard Katie and Viv making their way through my flat, eventually making it to the doorway of my room, poking their heads around the side of my bedroom door.

As soon as I caught sight of Viv I bursted into tears, no longer being able to hold in the emotions that I’d holed up for the better part of the past 24 hours.

She was quick to be at my side, not protesting whatsoever as I threw myself into her arms, soaking the shoulder of her jumper with my tears and snot immediately. I was a blubbering mess, murmuring a flurry of apologies and admissions into Viv’s collarbone, the guilt of my actions settling into my gut.

“Hey, liefje, it’s okay, take some deep breaths for us.”

I burrowed my head into Viv, the feeling of sickness washing back over my body and making me feel worse.

“We’ve got you kiddo, I know you feel icky, but we need to get you to the hospital, to get you some help, so you can feel a bit better.”

I groaned into Viv’s body, rolling my eyes as she snickered a little bit at my reaction.

“I know you don’t want to, but we’re all really worried about you and you need some help, you're burning up like crazy, so let us take you, please?”

Leah’s palms were rubbing circles into my back, relaxing the muscles that were so tense. Viv’s arm was wrapped tightly around my shoulder, like she was protecting me from the world.

“C’mon kid, Katie and I have the car downstairs, all warm for you.”

Viv’s offer was enough to have me sighing in defeat and pursing my lips. I nodded half heartedly, letting Leah pull me from Viv’s arms so she could stand up. Leah helped me to pull my ugg boots over my feet whilst Kim and Katie finished collecting my things. I tried valiantly to walk by myself, but only made it to my doorway before my legs were weakening below me and Leah had to catch me. She carried me bridal style to the car, squishing me into the backseat between her and Kim.

My head found its way into the nook of Kim’s neck, silent tears and snot making its way down my face as we drove slowly towards the hospital. Leah, with a tissue at hand, very discreetly wiped at my face when I needed it and kneaded my arm muscles with her hands, helping my trembling hands to relax just a little bit. Slowly as we continued to drive any energy that I had previously possessed started to fade.

Kim called Sam, at my insistence, Sam was worried as soon as she heard Kim’s voice and after the explanation practically begged Kim to let her speak to me, so I was put on the phone with Sam, even at my reluctance.

“Joey?”

“Yup.”

“Hey sweet, how you feeling?”

I gulped slightly, not wanting to make Sam worry but also not wanting to lie to my skipper.

“Shit, I’m fine though.”

I could hear Sam’s eye roll from the otherside of the phone.

“41 degree temperature doesn’t sound too fine to me, what were you thinking?”

“Just wanted to have some fun.”

Sam’s scoff from the other side of the phone was enough to tell me she was more than displeased with my actions, something that most of the people in the car seemed to share.

“Next time you want to have fun, can you do it with someone other than McCabe, I hardly think she’s a role model for you, considering both of your reckless personas.”

Somehow Katie managed to overhear Sam’s words, a look of complete offence washing over her face.

“I’ll have you know Kerr that she practically begged me.”

Leah shushed Katie with a glare, the guilty look on Katie’s face told me she’d already had to hear a mouthful from our captains, and she would be on the receiving end of another one if she didn’t shut her mouth.

“Mm, sounds like our girl, well I’m going to go collect Alanna, Macca and Caitie, who are all very concerned about your wellbeing and we’ll see you at the hospital, okay?”

“Mm kay, thank you Sammy.”

As soon as the phone call ended I passed my phone back to Kim, relaxing my body back against hers, the actions of the day taking a toll on my body and resulting in a dramatic drop in my energy levels.

When we did arrive at the hospital I was hardly coherent, back on a fever induced cloud that made me hardly conscious. Katie was tasked with carrying me into the ER, Leah not being able to carry me much further than a few feet with her recovering knee injury. When we made it into the ER I was immediately tended to and sent straight into a room. My body was immediately connected to a series of machines and wires.

I fought against the nurses, to the point where Leah had to actually climb into the bed with me to keep me calm, my delusional body unhappy with the cold hands and cords connecting with my body. The contact with Leah though had seemed to calm me enough though for the doctors to be able to do their jobs and connect me up to monitors and IV fluids that my body was in desperate need of. There was a lot of bustling happening around me, but I kept my eyes closed, feeling instantly better when some pain relief and medicine was administered to my body, making me sleepy enough to fade into a deep sleep.

When I woke up I was hit with a reminder of my throbbing headache, my whole body hurt. Chest, ribs, head, it all hurt. I struggled to open my eyes and when I did my headache was only worsened by the light flooding into my room through the gaps in my blinds. I was shocked by the sheer amount of people crowded in my room, a different room to the one I’d fallen asleep in. My eyes flashed across my body, taking in all of the wires that my body was connected to, wires, leads, IV cords, my body was covered in more wires than it was skin. I panicked almost immediately, reaching to pull at the cords but my hands were stopped almost immediately.

“Hey Joey.”

It was Kim’s eyes that caught my own, her deep Scottish accent getting my attention and taking it away from the crawling feeling across my skin that all of the wires were causing.

“W-What happened?”

My eyes were darting across the room, my brain trying to remember what course of events had lead to me being in this position. My eyes caught onto my teammates, who were piled on sofas and chairs in the room.

“You went out in the snow, do you remember that? Katie took you out and you got a chill from it, because your body was vulnerable with the cold you developed pneumonia, pretty serious, you had us all worried for a little bit. Leah and I came to your apartment, because you hadn’t shown up to training and we were all worried about you, and we found you and took you here.”

It was a lot of information to take in, I couldn’t do much more than nod my head at Kim, like a goldfish.

“M’ sorry for worrying you.”

Kim smiled at me, shaking her head.

“It’s okay Joey, all forgiven, we’ll talk about it another day, right now you need to focus on getting yourself better.”

I pursed my lips, eyeing Sam who was sitting at my bedside, looking me up and down. There was a lot of emotions on her face, her jaw was locked and I could see some disappointment and concern in her eyes, amongst other things.

“Sam-.”

“We’ll talk about it another day Joey, I’ve already laid into McCabe about not giving into you, I don’t think Williamson is going to be letting you out of her sight anytime soon. I just want to know why you didn’t call me, or anyone. Sweet, there are so many people around who care about you and you worried us all, had you called anyone when your symptoms had started to show, or even the previous morning this all could have been avoided.”

Sam’s voice was stern, the voice she used when she mad at one of her girls for getting in unnecessary trouble.

“Didn’t want to bother anybody.”

Sam stood up at my reply, taking two short steps to my bedside and looking at Kim.

“Nobody in this room would have felt bothered, you were sick y/n, seriously sick and had Kim or Leah not decided to come and check on you, you could be dead right now, or in the ICU. You are so lucky to have a group of people that genuinely care and love for you and it worries me that you aren’t utlising that, what did I promise your parents when you told them that you were going to be making the move to London?”

I bit down hard on my lip. Sam had always been like my second mom, or older sister, ever since I’d started playing with the Matildas, when I was 15. She’d been a major influence in my life, so when my parents had found out that I had plans to move to North London to play for Arsenal at 19 they were displeased to say the least, I was hardly 18 as well, still a baby. They’d made Sam promise a bunch of things to them, considering we were both in London together.

“That you wouldn’t let anything happen to me, and you’d keep me safe.”

Sam’s jaw locked even more than it previously had, her eyes were dark brown, stormy almost, I could feel the internal conflict she was going through just by looking at them.

“Exactly, so how do you think it makes me feel when you are endangering yourself? It makes me feel like I should be calling your parents and telling them that maybe this wasn’t the best decision, maybe you need another year or two at home before you can live by yourself out here.”

I shook my head at Sam, that was the last thing I wanted. After all, it had taken so much begging with my parents to get me out here in the first place, being sent back practically ensured they’d never let me come back out here.

“Sam, please, this is where I need to be.”

“I have no doubt in my mind that those words are true, on a playing level you should be here. But you continue to prove that you can’t be trusted to make decisions for yourself. Going out in the snow was crazy, not telling anyone you felt sick was crazy. You're not proving to me or your parents that this was a good idea.”

I could feel tears brimming up in the back of my eyes. It had taken a lot of effort to get my parents to let me be here, there was nothing they wanted less than to send their eighteen year old daughter to London, all by herself, playing in a senior women's team.

“Please, please let me stay. I can’t go home, if I go home then that’s the end for me, Perth won’t take me back after how I left. My parents have enough on their plate with six other kids, let alone having to deal with me, please, I need to stay. I’ll make better decisions, I promise, please just let me stay.”

I’d shot up in the bed, tugging the cords and blankets up with me. Sam sat herself down on the edge of my bed, looking at me eye to eye.

“I know you’re sorry, and I really want to believe that you can do this, there is nothing that I want more than for you to be here and proving how amazing you are, but your risking your own health Joey, and I toe the line there. What happens when you get injured and decide not to tell anybody, I know you and I know that you are never going to ask people for help and I can’t be around 24/7 here to look out for you, if I could I would. I can’t trust that you are going to look after yourself when I’m not here.”

I felt a series of big, fat, wet, warm tears drip down my cheek, I felt like shit and all of my dreams were being crushed.

“We’ll look after her, we’ll take her in if we have to. Nobody wants to see y/n/n going home because of this, we’ll look out for her, please don’t make her go home.”

It was Beth’s voice, from the other side of the room that caught my attention. There was a guilty expression across her face, Alessia, Katie, Caitlin and Beth all carrying the same similar guilty expression, my accomplices.

Sam turned to Beth, it was clear she was tossing up her options.

“Beth’s right, she should stay, she’s worked hard enough to stay and we can hardly afford losing any defenders right now. I’ll take her in, she can move into the spare room in my house, I run a tight ship, I’ll keep her under control.”

It was the voice of Leah that was both my saving grace and sent a chill of fear down my spine. Moving in with Leah didn’t exactly sound like my dream situation, I knew that Leah would hold me accountable for my shit, something I wasn’t necessarily ready to deal with. Sam had immense respect for the England captain though, often times she’d expressed to me how much she admired Leah for doing what she did at such a young age, she was stern though, she didn’t forget anything and nothing got past Leah.

“Okay, if she can move in with Williamson then she can stay, this is all stuff we can talk about when you are feeling better though, you need your rest joey, with all those meds running through your body god knows how tired you must be, hm?”

I squirmed a little bit under the covers, not wanting to give into Sam’s words but also not denying that she was right, I did feel tired. Sam’s hand found its way to my cheek, wiping away the tears I had shed and giving me a little smile, the smile she kept for these moments, the rough ones that warranted some kind of assurance that it was all going to be okay.

“Go to sleep Joey, we’ll figure it all out when you are feeling better, right now you need rest, so you can feel better.”

I relaxed back into the uncomfortable hospital pillows, that all of a sudden didn’t feel so uncomfortable to my body, which was slowly starting to fade into a deep cloud of sleep. Sam pressed a kiss to my hairline before sitting back down in her seat and watching me drift off to sleep. Maybe everything wasn’t perfect, maybe I still had things that I needed to learn but I did have one thing, and that was a family that I’d found in my teammates.

#woso #woso community #leah williamson #arsenal wfc #arsenal women #arsenal x reader #arsenalwfc #kim little #sam kerr #sam kerr x reader #kim little x reader #katie mccabe #alessia russo #beth mead #vivianne miedema #caitlin foord #sickfic

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fear-less · 27 days

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₊˚⊹˚ 𐙚 led by blind faith

pairing: harry potter x reader

warnings: smut, first time, ngl ending is rushed, use of y/n, fem reader lol sorry, p in v, unprotected sex oops, hand & blow job, first time writing smut…😭, somewhat jumps right into it, let me know if i missed anything

1.3k words ^_^

a/n: first time writing smut…so it’s not that good but the ending is cause it’s fluffy :3😭 also, false god lyrics as the titled we r cheered (i cant come up w titles so they’re always taylor inspired 🔥)

You and Harry were in your bedroom, after a few days of convincing him to come to yours during the holidays he had finally said yes.

It was 20 past 10, you were on top of him, kissing, the movie playing in the background long forgotten. Kissing was always the farthest thing you two have done, only dating for a few months.

But as the months have gone by, you have slowly been wanting more, more than kissing. nonetheless, you never brought it up to Harry afraid he would not want to go that far just few months into dating.

But now, you didn’t want to stop at just kissing, you wanted to go all the way. so now, here you were sitting on Harry’s lap, legs around his torso making out, few minutes in you started moving your hips, dry humping him.

“Mmm, Y/n, what’re you doing?” Harry said, catching his breath.

“do you want me to stop?” you said smirking knowing he probably wouldn’t want to stop, feeling him get hard beneath you.

“No, please don’t stop” Harry said whining, bringing you back into the kiss. His hands roamed your body, igniting every nerve with a tingling sensation. The soft sighs and gasps that escaped your lips mingled with the sound of heavy breathing, creating a symphony of desire.

Your movements became more urgent and rhythmic, each grind of your hips against his eliciting a low growl from Harry’s throat. The friction between your bodies sent waves of pleasure coursing through you, heightening every touch and kiss

Harry felt the tantalizing edge of release drawing near, his breaths shallow and ragged with anticipation. Just as he was on the brink, you abruptly halted, leaving him whining in frustration as the waves of pleasure ebbed away.

“Why’d you stop?” Harry’s voice cracked with need, his eyes pleading for the blissful sensation to continue a little longer.

You met his gaze with a mischievous smirk, relishing in the power you held over his pleasure. As Harry huffed in mild annoyance, your smirk deepened, knowing the effect your actions were having on him. With a deliberate movement, you peeled off your shirt, revealing a sight that made Harry’s annoyance evaporate into thin air.

Harry’s eyes widened in awe as he took in the sight before him, his breath hitching at the sudden rush of desire that engulfed him. The soft glow of the room cast a tantalizing sheen over your exposed skin, accentuating every curve and contour in a way that left Harry spellbound.

Without a word, Harry reached out, his fingertips tracing the outline of your bare shoulders, a silent plea for permission and affirmation. You met his touch with a subtle arch of your back, inviting him closer, igniting a primal hunger that had been simmering beneath the surface.

The air crackled with electricity as Harry’s lips found yours once again, a fervent urgency driving their movements. Every kiss was a symphony of longing and exploration, each touch a declaration of unspoken desires.

With trembling hands, Harry continued to explore the canvas of your skin, his touch tentative yet eager, as if afraid to break the spell that bound you together. But there was no turning back now, the floodgates of passion had been opened, and both of you were swept away in the torrent of raw, unbridled need.

Soon enough, you found yourself laying on your stomach, in between Harry’s legs. His pants off and left in his boxers, palming his hard on through them.

After a few seconds, you took his boxers off, his cock now in your hands, dragging your fist up and down. Loving how Harry was reacting, seeing him like this made your panties wet, embarrassingly wet.

“Please, use your mouth,” you hesitate for a moment before taking him into your mouth, exploring the length of his cock with your tongue.

His hands finding their way to your hair, pulling at it when wants you to go deeper.

"Oh fuck yes...", he moans, biting his lower lip. His cock throbs against your tongue, wanting more attention as he leans against your bed frame for support.

You take him deeper into your mouth, sucking gently on the head while your hand strokes the rest in time with your bobbing actions. “Mmm, just like that, baby...", he pants, his hips starting to move in rhythm with your mouth.

Harry’s grip in your hair tightens more, jerking his hips foward. "Please keep going... I'm close," he whines, his voice strained. "Don't stop now."

You keep going, taking him deeper into your mouth. The thought of making him cum making you eager.

Harry’s breathing is ragged now, his body trembling of pleasure. "I'm gonna cum princess...," he warns, his voice rough from need.

He groans, his hips jerking forward as he empties himself into your mouth. His hot cum fills you up, causing you to gag a little bit as he fills your mouth up, you swallow it and pull your mouth off his still hard cock, you sit up slowly.

Harry grabs your waist and pushes you down onto the bed, your legs now wrap around his waist and your arms around his neck. He takes off your sleep shorts and moves your panties to the side, revealing your glistening pussy.

“You’re so soaked sweetheart..” He whispers, sliding two fingers in you making you moan his name. He pumps his fingers in and out of you in a slowly before taking his fingers out and putting them into his mouth, groaning at the taste.

He loved the sight of you in nothing but your panties, laying underneath him, everything about you would be just so perfect to him, it makes his stomach flutter.

“I need more, Harry, need you inside me” you panted softly, rocking your hips against his hand.

“Of course, sweetheart,” he laughed breathily,

rolling his hips against you again, coating his cock in your already leaking juices before catching on your entrance and achingly slowly sinking into your plush walls and making you arch your back.

“I love you,” he murmured against your neck feeling your wall already fluttering around him. Pulling himself almost completely free of you but thrusts back into you lazily, setting a slow but steady pace that was driving you crazy with each stroke. “I love you so much.”

“Harry, I love you too,” you almost sobbed as your climax washed over you your walls clenching around him tightly.

“I love you more” He grinned, he gives a few more thrusts before allowing himself to fall over the edge and fill you with his warm seed.

In the quiet aftermath, a serene calm settled over the room, punctuated only by the soft sounds of your synchronized breathing. Harry’s arms wrapped protectively around you, his touch gentle and reassuring as he traced soothing circles along your back.

With whispered words of affection and reassurance, you both savored the intimacy of the moment, basking in the warmth of each other’s presence. The tenderness in Harry’s gaze spoke volumes, a silent promise of care and understanding that transcended words.

As the world outside remained oblivious to the shared intimacy you had just experienced, you found solace in the cocoon of love and trust that surrounded you both. Harry’s fingers trailed lazily through your hair, his touch a soothing melody that lulled you into a state of contentment.

In that sacred space of aftercare, boundaries dissolved, and vulnerabilities were embraced. The unspoken bond between you deepened, strengthened by the shared vulnerability and tenderness of the moment.

Together, you reveled in the simple yet profound act of caring for each other, finding solace and comfort in the gentle aftermath of passion. It was in these moments of intimacy and aftercare that the true essence of your connection blossomed, a testament to the depth of your love and the unspoken emotions that bound you together.

#harry potter #harry potter oneshots #harry potter x reader #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter x y/n #harry potter x you #harry potter smut #harry james potter x y/n #harry james potter x you #harry james potter x reader #harry james potter imagine #harry james potter

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bloodynereid · 1 year

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hey, i loved the fic u wrote for the request i sent, it was absolutely brilliant

i was hoping you could write another where the band finds that karen is dating a female reader and maybe what their reactions would be like?

lol that would be awesome 🫶😋

Radiance

pairing: karen sirko x fem! gf reader

a/n: hii! i absolutely love ur requests. I hope you enjoy this even if it isn't as long as the last fic u requested. karen sirko is the loml and she deserves more fics!!

tw: period typical homophobia mentions (fuck that but it needed to be added cause of ✨plot✨), swearing, kissing, billy being an asshole (as per usual lmao), drinking

description: the band reacts to finding out you're karen's girlfriend and it goes better than expected.

she's so pretty ahhhh... okay moving onto the main story now.

You were standing next to the bar as you listened to your girlfriend’s band with a smile on your face as you took a sip of water. You were here as a surprise since she had been recording for the past week and you had barely seen each other. You were mesmerized by how stunning she looked on that stage. So immersed with music that it seemed like it was her lifeblood.

After a few more of the band's songs, they retired off stage. And you carefully moved through the crowd towards the backstage doors, where already a large amount of groupies were huddled around.

“Hey Mark!

“Y/N I didn’t know you were coming tonight.”

“Just came to see an old friend.”

“Karen is going to be very happy to see you.” He sent you a little wink and a smile as he let you through the doors. The security guard had become a friend of yours after Karen introduced you to him after a show. He may look like a giant but he was truly a teddy bear and… a huge supporter of your relationship with Karen.

“Uh hi?” The frontman of the band, Billy greeted you as you walked through the doors. “Can I help you with something?”

“I was actually just-”

“Y/N!! Oh my god hi!” The familiar British voice echoed through the room making you turn towards your girlfriend as she enveloped you in a hug. “What are you doing here? I thought you had a planning session tonight.”

“They canceled last minute and I wanted to see you.” You let her out of the hug as she slung an arm around you.

“Aww aren’t you a big softie?”

“Well you have been pestering me to come to one of your shows.”

“That I have. Oh right, Y/N meet Billy. Billy meet Y/N, my best friend.” You offered your hand and widened your smile slightly, even as your heart clenched at the mention of ‘best friend’ but it was always better to be safe than sorry.

“Nice to meet you.” He shook your hand and took a drag of his cigarette before walking off with a grunt.

“Wow he really is as much of an asshole as you said he was.”

“Don’t mind him. Are you ready to go?”

“You aren’t going to stay with the band for a little longer?”

“No, that's okay. How about we go to your house?”

“Sounds like a plan.” You both exited through the back doors and made your way to your red Camaro. Ready to finally spend some time alone with the woman you love.

“Hey where did Karen go off to?” Graham asked as he walked into the back room, only to find the rest of the band (minus Karen) drinking, smoking or writing.

“I don’t know man, she disappeared like 20 minutes ago with this really pretty girl.” Warren said as he took another drag from his cigarette.

“Right. She’s been doing this a lot lately, hasn’t she?”

“Huh?” Warren asked.

“Disappearing off to god knows where.”

“Maybe she got a boyfriend.”

Graham: At the time we had no idea Karen was into girls but there were obvious signs that we were just too stupid to miss.

Camila: Oh I knew of course, I mean I introduced Y/N and Karen in the first place.

Graham: I don’t think we found out until the night of Camila and Billy’s housewarming party.

“Are you sure she wants me to be here?”

“Yes, now shush and help me fix this bloody jacket.” You let out a chuckle as you repositioned the parcels on your arm and carefully lifted Karen’s hair before fixing the jacket.

“Are we the only ones here?”

“Karen! Y/N, you came!”

“That I did.”

“Actually you arriving early is perfect for me. Can you help put some tablecloths outside? You should add some rocks on them so they don’t fly off.”

“No problem, you coming?”

“Be there in a second, love.” Karen smiled and gave a quick peck on the lips before disappearing into the backyard.

“So you two seem to be doing well.” Camila said as she wiggled her eyebrows mischievously.

“Yeah we are. Oh right, I wanted to give you these.” You handed Camila the carefully packaged gifts. She tore through the tissue paper after undoing the ribbon and audibly gasped.

“You didn’t.”

“Well I know you were looking for a perfume and since everything is so expensive these days I called in a favor from a friend.”

“But this is like gold.”

“Yeah well I owe you.”

“Aww Y/N.” She enveloped you in a hug that you quickly reciprocated as Billy walked into the room.

“Hey I can’t find- oh hi.”

“Hi, good to see you again.”

“Yeah sorry about being a bit of an asshole last time.”

“You’re good. I understand how tiring that must have all been.”

“Yeah umm Cami do you know where I can find those streamers?”

“They should be in the kitchen cupboard.”

“Great thank you darling.”

“I can’t believe you got me a Dior perfume!”

“Wait there’s more. I ended up making a few extras of the children’s clothes from my client so I thought I could bring some for Julia. If they don’t fit her I’m sure-” That was before you were engulfed by yet another Camila hug.

“Thank you. God I’m so happy Karen found you.”

“I think that credit all goes to you.”

A few hours later the party was in full swing and you were sitting next to Karen sipping on a beer as you chatted with Warren about some of your favorite designers. The man had great taste in clothes. Sometime during that conversation Karen had slipped an arm around your waist making you lean your head on her shoulder.

Warren: Y/N and Karen? Yeah I don’t remember that party vividly. I don’t know… I think I kind of knew they were together by the way they acted and hey, I wasn’t one to judge. Plus Y/N was great to talk to, we became pretty good friends.

Throughout the course of the night, you both drank very little. So when time came to sit at the piano and sing you were more than happy to observe your incredibly talented girlfriend. You had come to stand next to Cami as she cradled Julia in her arms, trying to get her back to sleep.

“May I hold her for a moment?” She nodded and as the band continued singing you caught Karen’s twinkling eyes as you carefully cradled the little girl in your arms. She sent you a soft smile and scrunched up her nose slightly, which was your little non-verbal signal that meant ‘I love you’. You scrunched your nose back and sent her an air kiss.

As the rest of the guests trickled out you found yourself on the couch with the rest of the band trading stories and anecdotes. You cuddled up next to Karen and Eddie as you animatedly told the story of how you met Karen through Camila, with Karen chiming in at random parts.

“So yeah we kind of kept meeting up a few times after that and suddenly one of those times she kiss- oh fuck.” Even the small amount of alcohol that you had consumed had loosened your tongue to the point where you had just spilled the biggest secret of them all.

“You know we don’t care right? I mean I thought you guys were together ever since I saw you two.” Eddie said from beside you as you readjusted your position.

“Yeah look I have a few friends who also like women. People who care about that shit are idiots and assholes.”

“Here here.” Graham said as he clinked his glass with Daisy, whilst Camila and Billy both just sent you reassuring smiles.

“Plus you both are really hot.”

“Warren!” Everyone exclaimed and Karen sent a pillow to his head.

After a few more minutes of chatting, you and Karen decided to make your way to your car. You opened up the driver's seat and clutched the wheel in anxiousness.

“You’re not mad?” You asked as Karen got in and looked at you quizzically.

“How could I be mad? I have a wonderful girlfriend and now I know how good it feels to say that in the open. I could never be mad at you. I think I love you too much for that, darling.” She swiped away the tears that were starting to form on the corners of your eyes and gave you a reassuring smile.

“I love you so so much.” You answered before gently taking her face in your hands and softly pressing your lips together as the stars twinkled above you and the streetlight shined on your faces.

i really have to write more for Karen this was fun. as always requests are open and if anyone wants to chat feel free to send me a message or an ask ly <3

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yougavemeyourheartyouknow · 7 months

Text

On thin ice (Hockey player! Miguel O’Hara x Ice skater! Fem! Reader

A/N: Hehe new chapter bitches come feast 🤭. The usu, so excuse grammatical errors and typos, Miguel being ooc most likely. Also if anyone knows that “get your hands off my stunt” tiktok I wanted to make a reference to it in here hehe.

(Y/N)- Your name.

Cursing, Miguel not knowing how to communicate his feelings, Peter trying to get Miguel to communicate said feelings. Logan being a king lol.

Word count: 1.4k

Series Masterlist

Chapter 12: Baby we both know,that the nights are mainly made for saying thing’ that we can’t say tomorrow day.

—

“Alright, let’s practice the lift.” Logan said, as he motioned for you to step closer to him, which you quickly obliged, standing next to him as you both postion yourselves for the crucifix lift. You took a deep breath as you grip onto Logan’s tone shoulders, trying to focus on you and your partner rather than the shouts and the sound of composite hockey sticks hitting the puck that was coming from the inside of the rink that was happening 20 feet away from you. Usually on Thursdays you both wouldn't go over your lifts off the ice while the spiders practice, but with a week and a day till regionals, anxiety has gotten the best of you, and the inability to get one of the empty dance rooms to practice only helped turn that anxiety into annoyance.

As Logan goes down to position his hands on you, and began to lift you, one the hockey players thought it would be oh so funny to shoot the puck in your direction, causing it to hit the plastic barrier with a loud bang, startling you a bit as you let go of Logan’s shoulders, letting out a small screech, and a few chuckles from the players on the ice. Thank god for Logan, the heavenly partner he was, was still able to go through with the move, although his movements were slightly shaky due to the scare. It seems you both weren’t the only ones to notice the shakiness, because one of the players that wasn’t on the ice was walking by and noticed too.

“I got her, I got her.” He mumbled as he stopped behind you and placed his hands on your waist, you didn’t move from the touch since if you tried to squirm away, your hip would hit Logan’s head.

Logan in response let out a dry chuckle as he looked over at the guy holding onto your waist, giving him a once over before saying, “get your hands off my partner.” To which the other guy quickly let go, putting both hands up in a defensive manner.

“Sorry man, just trying to help.” The guy said as Logan flipped you to put you back on the floor.

“Yeah, well, I didn't ask.” Logan replied as he whipped his hands on his practice tights. You couldn’t help but let out a little snort at Logan’s sassiness.

“Reilly! Stop talking to those two and get your ass in here! We still have 20 minutes!” You turned your head once you heard Miguel’s orders to his teammate, as he skated past you three, his eyes lingering a bit longer on you then it did on Logan or on his teammate, both your eyes locking for a split second, and in that second, time slowed for a bit.

“You heard him Ben, get your ass in here!” Peter shouts next, your eyes ripped from Miguel’s to look over at him. Honestly, the only one you could really recognize in red and blue sports gear was Mig, you only knew it was Peter who just spoke from the sound of his voice, even with the numbers and the names on the back, although you didn’t really know any but Peter and Miguel. With Miguel it was easier to tell him apart from the rest since his physique was so much different from the others. Sure they were all tall and muscular, but compared to Miguel…

“Oh my god stop being a horny bitch…” you scolded yourself internally, shaking your head as you watched the guy whose name was Ben Reilly (you were guessing at least, it made more sense to you then Reilly Ben.) made his way back on the ice.

“Fucking god… he thinks I don’t know what I’m doing…” Logan scoffed under his breath as he whispered to you, his eyes narrowed as he looked over at the rink before his gaze met yours, his shifting to one of a more playfulness once he saw the look of amusement in your eyes. “What?” He asked with a slight chuckle as he moved his hands to rest inside of his jacket pockets.

“Nothing, it’s just funny. When you said it like that, you sounded so possessive.” You grinned, lightly pointing him in his ribs, your grin widened when he scowled and squirmed away from your touch in retaliation.

“Well, excuse me, for not wanting someone else who I don’t know to be touching my ice dancing partner while we practice the moves.” Logan retorted with an eye roll, taking his hands out of his pocket to instead cross his arms in front of his chest. “Besides, I know you didn’t want him to touch you as much as I didn’t.” He added with a slight head tilt and a small smirk.

“Yeah, yeah...” you scoffed with a smile.

—

“Miguel…”

“Miguel..”

“Miguel.”

“Mig-“

“Shut the fuck up Peter, I’m trying to focus.”

“I know you don’t like ‘talking about your feelings’ or whatever but you can’t just ignore her-“

“Watch me.”

Peter let out an exasperated sigh, running his hands through his light brown hair, before putting both hands onto the small dining room table that was in their tiny kitchen area, leaning his weight against it as he watched Miguel, who’s eyes never lifted from We’re he sat at the table, shifting from the notebook, to his laptop then to his textbook and back again, but never actually letting his eyes wander up to meet his friend’s.

“I can ignore her till I die.” Now that was a lie. Miguel knew it the second he uttered the words, although not a complete lie, it was still a lie. Sure, he could tease you, call you names, send you those classic smirks of his, and kiss you with more hunger than a starving man could devour food with when no one was around to look, all he wanted. But having to look you in the eyes, talking about how you made his heart race far more faster than any sort of championship game did,having to keep his jealousy at bay when he saw the was Ben put his hand on your waist in an attempt to help support you, when you and Logan were practicing outside of the rink today, knowing if he didn’t you’d be a witness to the sight of Ben Reilly getting decked in the face. The thought of having to him allowing himself to lay bare to you, he couldn’t even imagine it, he was never was one to talk to others in a way to allow himself to be seen as vulnerable, as a human with complex thoughts and emotions, so the prospect of you the only woman to make his heart stir with such emotion that it felt like he was suffering a heart attack, knowing what he hiding in the depths of his mind was utterly terrifying to him.

“Besides-“ Miguel continued, finally looking up at Peter, “I'm more focused on my next midterm to be worrying about some silly, little crush. I'm not a schoolgirl.” He finished before looking back down at his laptop, his full dark brows scrunched together as he attempted to concentrate on the more important task at hand. If he was still looking up, he’d see how Peter’s eyes widened once he had finished speaking.

“Wait… say that again.” Peter muttered quietly, Miguel looked up at his dorm mate again with a raised brow, before letting out a huff of air as he closed his laptop, knowing he isn’t going to get any work done with Peter continuing to push the conversation.

“ I said I’m too busy trying to get ready for-“

“No,” Peter almost hissed with how quickly he interrupted Miguel, “not that. You said crush, you, Miguel O’Hara just said you have a crush.” Once the words left Peter’s mouth, both males covered their mouths with their hands as their eyes widened, one in horror, the other in excitement.

“No I didn’t-“

“Oh yeah, you did!” Peter’s hands slips from his mouth, revealing that childlike grin he always seems to wear, but it was 10 times more annoying than it usually was, Miguel in response just dug his face further into his hand, muttering a curse in Spanish that his friend couldn’t quite understand.

“You’re gonna be the death of me Peter…” he mumbled into his palm, but his thoughts continued the sentence, “If (Y/N) doesn’t kill you first.”

—

Taglist: @tayleighuh @cowboylikeevie @coralineyouareinterribledanger @jukioku @loser-alert @miguel-ohara-eater @serpentstarr @littlexscarletxwitch @darksidescorner @sukioyakio @minimari415

#miguel o hara fanfic #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara #on thin ice fanfic #spiderman 2099 x reader #astv miguel #astv spiderman 2099 #miguel o’hara au #figure skating au #hockey au #miguel spiderverse #spiderman 2099 fanfic #spiderman 2099

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zepskies · 11 months

Text

Never Say Goodbye - Bonus Track #2

Pairing: Dean x Female Reader

Summary: The first time you and Dean sensed each other’s thoughts and feelings, you were just kids. It would take years to realize that you both were bonded for life, and even longer to finally meet. [Soulmate AU] (18+)

AN: Did I say two parts? I meant three lol. (It got too long, I’m sorry.)

Word Count: 4,300 Tags/Warnings: Angst, supernatural shenanigans, death…

Bonus Track #2: One Last Hunt

“Okay, try not to panic,” Sam said. Dean had him on the phone while he sped through town in the Impala.

“I’m coming now, but I won’t get there for a few hours,” Sam said. “My flight leaves in 20 minutes.”

“Thanks, man, but I can’t afford to wait,” Dean said. “She fucking disappeared. I don’t see her anywhere…I’m gonna have to start at her job. That’s where she first took off from.”

“How did she seem this morning?”

“Fine, I guess. I left before she woke up,” Dean said. He still felt guilty about the fact that he didn’t bother waking you up to say goodbye.

“Okay, yeah, start at the museum,” Sam said. “Let me know what you find, and I’d loop in Bobby. Probably Jack too.”

“Bobby’s meeting me there…but we don’t need to bring in Jack yet.”

“Dean, he’s her dad—”

“This isn’t his thing. It’s ours,” Dean said firmly. “If it’s a demon, I’m gonna find her and exorcize that son of a bitch.”

Sure enough, Bobby met Dean at the museum where you worked. The old man was worried, Dean could tell, even if he wouldn’t say it. But he knew the drill: now they had a job to do.

“I’ll go in first, flash my badge,” Dean said. “Meet me in the library.”

“Roger that,” Bobby agreed.

Dean had a decent rapport with your boss, Jerry. When he explained that you were actually missing, Jerry was concerned for your wellbeing instead of irate that you’d taken a very valuable book from the museum.

It gave Dean a theory to lie about on the fly: that you’d been mugged and taken hostage, presumably by someone who might’ve wanted to steal the ancient text.

“How ancient are we talking exactly?” Dean asked.

Jerry gave him a look. “Ancient Egypt.”

He showed you the inventory log on the new shipment you were supposed to compile into the system. The title missing from the rest was called The Eye of Ra.

“All right. Thanks, Jerry,” Dean said. “Anything else you can tell me about this book?”

“It’s a recording of the great deeds of the Ancient Egyptian gods and goddesses,” Jerry explained. “It was said to be touched by Ra himself.”

Touched by Ra, Dean mused. Ain’t that just fucking swell.

Whatever happened to you, Dean knew it was because you touched that book.

For the next few hours, Dean and Bobby worked together on deeper research in the library. Now that they had a starting point, Bobby was able to find some intel.

“The Eye of Ra was actually a nickname,” he said, earning Dean’s attention. “For Sekhmet, their goddess of war.”

Dean’s brows furrowed at that. “Why’s it never the goddess of peace and fucking tranquility?”

“Among other things, she was the daughter of Ra,” Bobby said, raising a wry brow. “And she was known as the bringer of plagues and death…and sometimes healing. Go figure.”

Fucking hell, Dean thought sourly. This was getting worse by the minute.

“Okay, what does this have to do with the book?” he asked. Though he had some idea.

“Well, she ain’t been alive in a millennium. But she had a husband. The god Ptah, a craftsman,” Bobby said. “According to this, when he was eventually killed, she sealed her soul away until she could find a way to rescue him from the underworld…I’ve gotta think she sealed it in that book.”

Dean sighed, rubbing the now aching spot between his brows. An ancient Egyptian goddess was most likely possessing his fiancé.

And it was much worse than it sounded on paper.

“Okay, which means she’ll be looking for a way to bring back her husband,” he said. “So how do we find her?”

Just then, the police radio buckled to Dean’s belt sounded off. When he listened closely, his eyes grew wide. It was a report of five murders committed at a nearby gas station.

Dean pulled up to the local 7-Eleven. Bobby was on the way, but he’d been caught up in traffic while Dean was allowed to use his police siren to his advantage.

He then used his badge clearance to get behind the yellow tape and over to Jack, who was still on duty.

Dean stepped inside the gas station and surveyed the brutal scene: the nice old man who owned the place, plus four patrons were lying dead.

Their skin was covered with boils.

Jack wore a disconcerted frown along with his crossed arms in his police jacket.

“It’s almost…biblical,” he remarked.

Dean knew just how right he was. Jack seemed to know that too when he glanced over.

“Is this your kind of thing?” he asked.

Dean nodded. “I might know what’s going on here. Let’s check the security footage…but no one else can see it but you and me.”

Jack nodded, leading Dean to the back of the store. Jack was shocked by what he found in the footage. Dean watched grimly, but not surprised as you came into the frame. You tilted your head at the owner, who seemed to ask you something.

You raised a hand, and with a flare of magic, everyone in the station was cowering and screaming as a plague of boils covered their bodies, and eventually ended their lives.

“Christ,” Jack gasped. “What the hell—”

“It’s not her,” Dean told him. “She’s being possessed. I’ll handle this, Jack. Just make sure this footage gets buried, along with whatever prints she might’ve left behind.”

Jack barely had time to agree. As if that kind of thing was so easy. He called after Dean as he took off out of the station.

Dean didn’t see Bobby yet when he got outside, but he didn’t have time to wait.

However, he did spot someone familiar hanging out in front of the department store across the street. Dean jogged across and raised a hand to flag down Jessie Deluca.

The kid was gnawing on what looked like a melting Butterfinger. He groaned in annoyance when he saw Dean coming.

“Not you again,” he muttered.

“Yeah, me again,” Dean said. “You been standing out here long?”

“Look, grandpa. I’m just chillin’ here,” the kid sassed. It sparked Dean’s irritation, as well as his impatience.

“I don’t give two shits if you’re contemplating the great Butterfinger Heist of 2008, all right?” Dean pointed back to the gas station. “You see that?”

Jessie’s expression faded from some of its assholeness, becoming more solemn. “Yeah, I heard someone died or something.”

“That’s right,” Dean nodded. “Did you see anyone walk out of the station?”

“No,” Jessie said. But Dean could tell it was a reflex, not the truth.

“Listen, Jessie. I need your help,” he said, more earnestly. “I’m trying to find someone. So if you know anything, I need you to tell me right now. Please.”

Dean stared down in the kid’s brown eyes. Eventually, Jessie relented.

“When I came out of the store here, I saw some business lady walk out. I think, after it had all just gone down,” Jessie confessed. “She looked fine.”

Dean sighed and nodded. “Okay. What’d she look like?”

“Uh…black skirt. Great legs,” Jessie said, his lips curving a little. Dean raised a brow.

“Anything else?” he asked wryly.

“White blouse, heels…actually, she kinda looked familiar,” Jessie added as he thought harder about it.

“Good. Now tell me what direction she went in,” Dean said. Jessie nodded and pointed him down the street.

“I think she went down there. I saw her turn the corner.”

“Where? What street?”

“Dude, I don’t know!”

“Then show me,” Dean insisted. He grabbed Jessie by the shoulder and guided him forward. The kid looked annoyed, but he begrudgingly agreed to lead him down the street. The two of them walked brusquely, with Jessie trying to match Dean’s longer strides.

Dean glanced over at his companion, who was still working on his Butterfinger.

“When’s the last time you ate something that wasn’t covered in chocolate?” he asked. Jessie didn’t look at him when he shrugged. His winter jacket hung off his skinny shoulders, making him look ten rather than thirteen. Dean’s heart twinged.

“Listen, next time you’re itching to knock over a department store for KitKats, come by the station,” Dean said. “Find me or my partner Jody Mills. Or even my boss, Jack. We’ll get you a burger or something.”

Jessie briefly looked up at him, but all too soon, his gaze returned to the ground.

“What do you care?” he said.

“Maybe I know something about having to fend for yourself,” said Dean. “Sometimes going hungry, not knowing when somebody’s gonna come back for you.”

Jessie’s jaw clenched. He didn’t answer, but Dean hoped he’d gotten through to him.

Jessie led him around the corner at the street he thought he saw you turn down. He and Dean didn’t have to walk too much farther before he found you through the window of a bakery, of all things.

“What the hell?” Dean muttered.

He pulled Jessie to the wall by the window for safety, but both of them snuck a peek inside.

You were once again wielding magic to spread a plague of boils across an entire room of screaming, agonized patrons just trying to get their donuts and cream pies.

Jessie started to utter a cry of alarm, but Dean quickly covered the kid’s mouth with his hand and pulled him back to his side. Dean waited, stock still, until the screaming inside the bakery subsided.

He looked down at Jessie and raised a finger to his lips. Though he was scared, Jessie nodded. Dean led him around the corner into an alley beside the bakery.

“What…the fuck was that?” Jessie hissed.

“Keep your voice down,” Dean warned.

Then suddenly, it donned on the kid as he looked up at Dean. “Oh, shit. That’s your freakin’ girlfriend.”

Dean let out a sharp sigh. “It’s not her…exactly.”

He knew Jessie didn’t understand. Dean sighed again and grasped Jessie’s shoulders.

“Look, you’re right to be scared. There’s something evil in there…that’s why I’ve gotta save her,” he said. “Now you, you’re gonna run. And don’t look back until you’re home, got it?”

After a moment, Jessie nodded shakily. Dean nodded back, patting him firmly on his shoulders.

“Good man,” he said. “Okay, scram.”

Jessie seemed reluctant, like he felt some type of way about leaving Dean behind. But at Dean’s encouraging look, Jessie took off running. Dean hoped he headed straight home.

Then, rolling his shoulders, Dean braced himself. He drew his gun, which was filled with silver bullets. He didn’t think it would work on an Egyptian goddess, nor did he want to pull a gun on you. But for the threat of it alone, he would have to draw it with the safety on.

He entered the bakery, where you were perusing the selections with a dispassionate look. All around you was death.

But you perked up when Dean entered, eyeing him curiously in recognition.

“Feelin’ a snack?” he asked.

“I have been asleep for a very long time,” you replied, holding up a pastry. “What is this confection?”

“Cherry Danish,” Dean supplied. “You’re Sekhmet, right?”

Your lips twitched. “You know of me?”

“I do now,” he said, carefully stepping further into the bakery with his gun pointed down, avoiding stepping on the bodies. He noticed the book you left closed on the counter. The goddess saw him noticing. Her gaze cut to him in amusement.

“Why’d you kill these people?” Dean asked. “Didn’t bow down at the right angle?”

“Among all of my brothers and sisters, I alone was favored by my father,” she said, “because my job was to balance the world, between life and the afterlife.”

Sekhmet brushed her fingers against a glass case, and with a small spark of magic, the glass cracked into thousands of fractals, but didn’t shatter.

“And I did exceedingly well at this,” she said. “Though I see that my work has been undone. This world is rife with imbalance.”

“Mass genocide. Nice,” Dean quipped. “But that’s not all you want, is it?”

Sekhmet’s head tilted at him with reluctant interest.

“I heard you’re looking for your husband, who went an offed himself,” he added.

The goddess’s lips pursed and she slapped a hand on the glass counter, making it shatter. Dean turned and shielded his eyes with his arm. By the time he recovered, Sekhmet was coming around the counter. He took a few cautious steps in the opposite direction.

“My husband was unjustly slain by the very people who once worshipped us in droves,” she said, her tone exacting and harsh. Her eyes, however, were heavy with fury and pain.

“He was an artist. A creator in purest form…his talents were wasted on this abomination of a world,” she said, with disgust at her surroundings. But as soon as her anger came, it diffused into exasperation.

She picked up a glazed donut and took a bite, crossing her arms. She hummed in delight, making Dean’s brows raise.

“Well, I can help you find him,” Dean said. It was a bluff, to be sure, but it still earned Sekhmet’s attention.

“Can you?” she asked in amusement. She didn’t believe him. Yet. But she drew closer to Dean, tilting her head just so. All the while, Dean inched towards the far end of the counter where The Eye of Ra had fallen to the ground.

“And after, you let my girl go,” he said.

“You know of a way to reach the Underworld?” Sekhmet’s gaze roamed over him in disdain. “Unlikely.”

“Well, I’d call it a gate to Hell. But same difference, right?” Dean quipped.

The second he tried to reach down for the book, however, Sekhmet pinned him in place with a vibrant amber coil of magic. Dean grunted as she forced him to the ground, onto his knees between the bodies of a young man and woman, likely a couple.

The goddess stopped in front of him, looking down at his face with interest.

“Dean Winchester, as you are called. I understand why you continue to display such reckless judgment, all but throwing your very life at my feet,” she said. Her lips curved knowingly. “I hold your lover, correct?”

She harshly grabbed his cheek in her hand, and Dean glared in response. She seemed to ponder something as she considered him.

“Soon to be your wife,” she realized.

And Dean had a feeling she was in your head, sorting through your thoughts and memories like any demon would. He didn’t know what was worse: the thought of you being awake in there, unable to fight this bitch’s hold, or if Sekhmet had completely taken over your body and shut you away.

“Just let her go,” Dean said, almost pleading. “You can have me. I won’t even fight you.”

“Such self-sacrifice,” she said. “The only noble act humans are capable of.”

Before she could decide whether to kill him, or keep him for further amusement, the front door of the bakery swung open.

Bobby came in first, followed closely by Sam and Eileen.

Bobby was holding a damn crossbow, which he aimed and shot off at Sekhmet. It was a warning shot, just grazing her shoulder. But it burned her with a sting of flesh that made her hiss in pain. She glared up at Bobby, and after grabbing the book before Sam could, she disappeared in a whirlwind of magic.

The coil holding Dean in place shattered, allowing Dean to catch his break and get to his feet, with Sam’s help. Dean had to admit, it was good to see his brother.

“You okay?” Sam asked. Dean reached over and pat the other man’s shoulder.

“I’m good,” he said, though with a sigh that belied his weariness. “Hey, Eileen. Thanks for making it to the party.”

The pretty brunette offered him a sympathetic smile, rubbing his arm. “We came as soon as we could.”

Dean nodded and turned to Bobby, who still held his crossbow. He wasn’t happy about the old man shooting at you, but he recognized that it had saved his life.

“Why’d that thing hurt her?” he asked.

“The arrow’s dipped in a potent mix of salt from the Dead Sea…and Egyptian wine, among other things,” Bobby replied.

Dean frowned in confusion. “Why the fuck?”

“According to the lore, Sekhmet could be subdued with alcohol,” Sam explained.

“Great, we’ll just get her drunk and all our problems will be solved,” Dean quipped dryly. He grabbed the radio from his belt. His gaze returned to the dead bodies on the floor with dismay.

“I’ve gotta call this in. Bobby, get the security tapes.”

After Dean finished calling in the deaths to his precinct, he shared a disheartened look with Sam, who grasped his shoulder in support.

“We’re gonna find her, all right?”

They regrouped at Bobby’s house once Jack took over at the bakery. Now the three men and Eileen were congregated in the living room, trying to decide on their next move.

“You told her about the Hell gate?!” Sam said incredulously.

“Damn it, Dean!” Bobby slapped the coffee table in exasperation.

“All right, lay off! I was improvising under fucking duress,” Dean snapped. “At least we know where she’ll probably go next, assuming she finds out where the gate is.”

“She’s a goddess, Dean. One of the oldest and most powerful in ancient history. I’m sure she can figure it out,” Sam said, rubbing at his tired eyes.

And, as Dean remembered, Sekhmet was rooting around in your head. She’d find the gate for sure.

Eileen looked between the brothers, clearly worried. Sam had told her about what you, him, and Dean had gone through to close that damn gate to Hell last year.

“So how do we stop her?” Dean asked. Without hurting you, was implicit. Bobby heaved a sigh.

“We gotta burn that damn book,” Bobby said. “But we’ll need to be smart about it.”

So that was how the four of them ended up driving to southern Wyoming. They stopped along the crossroads by the train tracks, and ventured in on foot into the very clearing where their final battle against Yellow Eyes took place.

Dean thought he’d be able to put his past behind him, but the universe clearly liked to kick him in the balls.

Evidence of this came when he saw you standing at Samuel Colt’s gravestone. Or rather, the goddess Sekhmet.

She was expending large forces of magic to try and open up the gate to Hell. The book that bound her soul lied on top of a nearby headstone.

Dean gestured for Sam, Eileen, and Bobby to hang back and fan out, while he stalked forward. He’d changed out of his police uniform in favor of his familiar jeans, shirt, and a red plaid shirt, hoping that at least would help you focus on him, wherever you were deep inside your mind.

But he called out to Sekhmet from a (relatively) safe distance away.

“Are you stupid or something?” he mocked.

Sekhmet paused in her magic wielding. She craned her head over her shoulder at him in annoyance, with amber rings illuminating her eyes.

“There’s only one thing that can open up that gate, and I’ve got it right here,” said Dean.

He pulled out the Colt from behind his back.

Sekhmet’s gaze narrowed on the gun, then at Dean with a slow smirk.

“Why, by the gods, should I trust your foolishness?” she asked.

“Because we’re about to make a trade,” Dean said. “The gun for my girl. You let her go, or you’ll never see your husband again. In this world, or the next.”

Dean pointed the gun at her and cocked the safety back. She didn’t have to know the barrel was empty.

“You cannot harm me, even if there was ammunition in that weapon,” Sekhmet replied knowingly.

She turned to him and reached out with a magic-fueled hand, but before she could grab Dean, Sam shot his own gun.

It deployed a net of rope that twined around her frame and held her in place. It was soaked with the same concoction Bobby shot her with in the bakery, and it made her fume with outrage.

It didn’t completely weaken her though. Her hands were still free to fling Sam and Bobby away from her with magic.

She then turned to grip Eileen, who was nearly able to steal the book. And the goddess sent Eileen across the clearing, breaking a headstone as she fell.

Sam had been trying to pick himself up from the ground, but he gripped at his chest, feeling his soulmate’s pain. He scrambled over to her prone form on the ground and checked the cut along her hairline.

“Eileen,” Sam called, pressing his hand to her cheek. He had one eye on her, and another on his brother.

Because meanwhile, Sekhmet had broken free of the ropes holding her captive with a cry of fury.

Just in time to grab Dean by the throat when he tried to surprise her from behind. She forced him down to his knees and smirked in satisfaction as Dean struggled against her hold.

He called your name, trying to reach you through the goddess’s hold on your mind.

“She is gone from this world,” Sekhmet taunted. “This is but a vessel for my eternal soul.”

“I don’t fucking believe that,” Dean choked. “If she was gone, I’d know it. Deep in my bones I’d know it.”

Her mouth twitched, but she seemed to enjoy the idea of slowly choking him to death. Or maybe, something was holding her back. Dean could only hope it was you, trying to break through.

He looked into your eyes and tried to find you through the cold disdain of a goddess.

“Whatever happens, I’m not letting go,” he gritted out. He held tight to your wrist, on the hand wrapped around his throat.

“I love you, you know that?” he said. “From the start…you closed the door in my face when I tried to kiss you. Teased me. Never took my shit. But you never left me either. No matter how hard it fucking got, you kept my feet on the ground. You never called it quits…‘cause we never say goodbye. Right, baby?”

Slowly, slowly, Sekhmet’s hard exterior faded. The amber rings of magic receded from your eyes, and the woman he loved was there again, softening your face into shock and horror.

You released your grip on Dean. He stumbled to the ground as he coughed and gasped for precious oxygen.

He straightened enough to grab your hand. You reached out for him instinctively.

“Dean,” you said with shaking effort.

“I’ve gotcha, sweetheart,” he said. He turned back to see his brother helping Eileen to her feet. “Sam, the damn book!”

Sam snapped to attention and quickly looked for The Eye of Ra. It had been knocked over from the headstone onto the ground. He grabbed it and fished out a lighter from his pocket.

Dean’s attention turned back to you when you squeezed his hands.

“I can’t hold her for long,” you said tremulously. Your whole body was shaking. “She’s so damn strong…”

“It’s okay, we’re gonna fix this,” Dean said, brushing your hair back from your face.

You closed your eyes and gasped. But when you opened them once again, they were hard, and glowing with magic.

Sekhmet tossed Sam away from the headstone.

Dean tried to hold her back, but she backhanded him hard. Sekhmet followed where he fell. She reached out and gripped him by the neck again, this time choking him with a vengeance.

But then she gasped, as if in pain. She turned her head and found Sam with the book in one hand, and a lit match in the other. As the book started to burn, Sekhmet weakened.

Dean caught her before your body could hit the ground.

Sekhmet released a shaking breath; she gazed into the dimming sky, painted in its golden, amber hues, and knew that her soul was dying. Hot tears slipped down her cheeks.

Dean almost felt sorry for her. Or maybe it was the sight of your pained, weeping face that tugged at his heartstrings.

“You’ll just have to join your husband this time,” he said.

Sekhmet’s lips trembled, but she nodded. “This world was never made for us…but we shall soon be together for all eternity.”

She looked up at him with a rueful smile.

“You understand,” she said. “A soul bond can never be destroyed.”

And with that, the haze of magic drained from your eyes as your body went limp.

Dean’s brows furrowed with worry as he called your name. Behind him, Sam helped Eileen draw near with a limping Bobby. All three watched with worry at Dean’s side…until your eyes opened, revealing their natural hue.

You took in a tremulous breath. “Dean.”

His eyes burned with emotion, but he closed them as he held you tight. All he could do was press his lips against your forehead in relief.

You clung to him right back, for as long as you needed to.

AN: Fun fact — According to Egyptian mythology, the only thing that could stop the goddess Sekhmet from ending humanity with bloodshed was by getting her drunk on beer, which had been dyed red to simulate blood (which she also liked to drink, apparently).

Egyptians (the survivors) would drink beer mixed with pomegranate juice and get drunk to celebrate not being killed dead. (Woo!)

Anyway, let me know if you enjoyed Part 2! All the fluff is coming in the finale of Part 3, very soon…

Next Time:

Dean brings you home. The two of you figure out how to move on from here...

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tokio-motel · 9 months

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Can you do a fanfic of tom x male reader were reader is the older brother of Britney Spears but tom or the band doesn't know that and they go to an awards show (whatever there called) and Britney keeps hugging and clinging on to us and tom gets extremely jealous because he thinks there dateing so he glares at reader and ignores them wean ever we try to talk or get close to him. And Britney comes to visit reader as a surprise for ur birthday but can find us and goes to tom and ask "have you seen my brother?" I'll give you my left kidney if you write this

TOM KAULITZ X BROTHER OF BRITNEY SPEARS

this was definitely hard to write but I really liked the plot-sorry if my writing isn't good I'm better at bullet pointing lol

"How much longer 'til we are there?"

Georg asked Tom, lazily slung on one of the couches in the tour bus. Tom took a few seconds before responding.

"Uhh I dunno...ask Bill."

Georg rolled his eyes, muttering a small "Asshole.." under his breath before turning to Bill and asking the question. Tom didn't respond to Georg calling him names though, as his mind was already preoccupied. They were going to an awards show (bb idk what it's called either LMFAO) and Tom didn't know how to react. I mean sure, he was excited and hopeful but also scared shitless. I mean, BIG stars were going to be here and he hated to admit it, but would feel small near these stars.

His leg shook up and down as he played with his lip ring, moving it in small circles as he got slightly worked up about the thought of having to go to this whole show thing.

"Tom..? You alright?" He heard Bill's voice ask faintly, but his heart rate increased as he thought about how many people will be there. What if he somehow embarrasses himself there? What if something happens to the band? What if he gets lost? What if he..

"TOM." A punch on his shoulder almost made him jump, his head whipping up so quickly he almost got whiplash. He winced at the pain in his shoulder before apologizing to his brother.

"Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I'm cool." He replied nonchalantly, although he was everything from it. When Bill raised a pierced eyebrow he continued. "Seriously, Bill. I'm fine." he gulped lowly, his palms becoming sweaty. "You're not scared about the show, right?" Georg asked from the couch, propping himself up on his shoulders. Before Tom could answer, Bill patted him firmly on the back "You got nothin' to worry about, silly. Everything is gonna be okay, yeah?" Somehow, his tone of voice brought Tom back to reality as he let out a sigh, smiling softly at the two band members. "Mhm. I know."

Before Bill could say something else, the bus came to a screeching halt, making Tom grimace due to the loud noise. "Alright, let's get moving, hm?" Jost said, opening up the door. Gustav came groggily out of the bathroom, having just woken up not even 20 minutes ago. "God man, I just got up.."

Bil giggled lightly, following Jost out the door "C'mon, 'lesgo!"

(AT THE AWARD THINGY MA-JIG 😋)

Tom shuffled, standing next to Gustav and Bill, Georg on the right of Gustav. His eyes scanned the crowd, trying to find a hot girl. Hey, if he has to stay here in this place full of people there has to be at least one hot chick, right? But his eyes scanned over somebody so beautiful, he had to do a double take. A gorgeous man with beautiful hair stood tall and confident, chatting with a blonde on his side. Tom's attention wasn't on her though, no, but on the boy.

The boy was.. exactly his type? I mean, he had been questioning if he was into men or not but always pushed it to the side, afraid of accepting himself. But looking at this boy made his stomach curl into knots and made his face slightly hotter than it was before.

Tom's fascination was cut short though, As he got to see the girls face more Cleary and saw it was none other than Britney. Britney Spears. His heart rate increased for the second time of the day as he noticed this. Britney was a fabulous, gorgeous girl. No wonder she was talking to this dude. He nipped his lip ring anxiously as he watched, to his horror, as she hugged the boy tightly and laid her head on his shoulder, laughing as he whispered something to her.

"Tom! Tom, are you even listening?!"

A pinch on his arm made him whimper in pain as he turned to Gustav, the blonde raising his eyebrows at him. "Huh? Sorry man... was'up?" Tom mumbled, his usual cherry and cocky self turned into a quiet, almost miserable boy as he replayed the memory of Britney wrapping her hands around the boy he had just seen. How has a stranger he never talked to made him feel this way?

"I was asking if you wanted to scout out some girls with Georg and me, yeah?" He asked, Georg smirking at Tom as he pointed in the direction of some pretty girls. "Seriously, the girls here are BEAUTIFUL, man!" Georg chortled, looking at Tom expecting a yes.

"Erm..No thanks. Not tonight.." Bill looked at Tom out of the corner of his eye. "... I'll go with you guys." Bill said quietly, smiling at the G's. They were surprised by both of the twin's answers, but nodded to Bill while smiling "Alright, let's go! Hey Tom, we are gonna be over there, kay?" A voice said, Tom not being able to make out who it was. All he could do was nod as he looked over at the boy again, Britney holding his hand and ruffling his hair. Tom felt pangs of jealously coursing through him, wishing that he could take the blonde's place. He watched how the boy smiled whenever Britney said something, or how he would laugh when Britney said something funny.

Tom's never felt like this before. He wanted to make this boy from heaven laugh, smile, and touch Tom's dreads. Although they were a good 50 feet apart, he could feel himself freeze as his blood went cold when the boy locked eyes with him. He could make out a faint smile and watched as the boys hand went to wave at him. He felt frozen in place as the boy walked over to him, still keeping that warm smile on his face. Tom felt the air leave his lungs as he properly saw how damn gorgeous he was. "Hey.. Your uh, Tom right? The guitarist from Tokio Hotel!" the boy spoke with a voice full of confidence. His voice was so beautiful Tom swore he could've heard angels singing in the background.

Tom let jealously get the best of him, as he found himself slightly glaring at the boy. He nodded slowly, muttering out a soft "Yes." although his nervousness made it seem more like a question. Even with his tone, the boy kept that dammed beautiful smile on. "Ah. My names M/N. It's nice to meet you!" Tom's eyes flickered back and forth between the boys two beautiful (colored) ones, feeling himself get more nervous and barley being able to keep upright. If he stayed here he knew he would die of nervousness.

"Oh.Erm.. I have to get back to my band." he grumbled out, trying to make himself seem confident but failing to do so. Tom's heart twisted as he saw the beautiful mans smile falter for a moment, before speaking in a slightly smaller voice. "Oh.. I'm sorry for keeping you up. See you around then, Tom." Tom hummed, almost falling on his heels as he darted to the band. As soon as he got there, a pretty brunette came up to him. "Hey.. I'm Abbi." *she said, smirking at him. He cleared his throat, not wanting his reputation to get ruined. "Oh? Is that so?" He held back a grimace as she threw herself on him, leaving light kisses on his jaw and neck.

His eyes stayed on one person though, and that was the boy. He felt really bad about just leaving him, but he really didn't know what else to do. He wanted to push this girl off him, go to the boy, and talk again. These thoughts left as quickly as they appeared as he saw the boy talk to Britney again, rubbing his arm. His stomach twisted as he detached his eyes from him quickly, trying to focus on the girl. But for some reason, it wasn't feeling good. It felt like a ghost lingered on his skin as she kissed him, feeling nothing but emptiness.

The girl picked her head up as someone called her name, another girl. She smiled, apologizing as she nipped Tom's neck one last time before going over to her friend. Tom groaned in relief but couldn't help but glance again at Britney and the mystery guy. What a mistake. She clung to his waist, head rested on his chest. He wanted to throw up as his chest curled and he felt jealously surge throughout his veins. Yes, this was going to be a longggg night.

Thirty minutes later, Tom found himself around a bar, his bandmates close to him. Georg burped rather loudly as he finished another bottle. " Alright Geo, that's your last." Bill scolded, taking away the empty bottle. "What do you mean? We are at a show!" Georg hissed, eyeing another bottle of beer. Gustav chuckled, patting Georg on the back "Georg, you're not even 21 yet. Relax, man." Georg grumbled as he laid back in his seat. "Tomi, go put this away for me, please?" Bill asked, smiling at his older brother. Tom rolled his eyes but took it. Stupid bar, why can't the employees go take the shit?

As he was going to put it back, out of the corner of his eye, he saw that dammed boy again. As he put the bottle on the counter, the man came beside him, smiling once more. He opened his mouth before Tom cleared his throat and walked away, leaving the boy confused and sad.

(when they announce Tokio Hotel wins cuz I'm not writing all that)

Tom felt like he had frozen, but was cut back to reality as everybody around them screamed and applauded. Bill brought Tom into a tight hug which Tom gave back, hugging his little brother like it was his last day on earth. Tom felt as if he was on cloud nine.

They went up to the stage, Bill being the singer holding the award. He gave s beautiful speech as he thanked everybody for the opportunity to receive this. Everybody applauded once again as all the band members hugged, feeling proud of themselves.

(like 20 minutes later idfk LOL)

Tom felt happy with himself as he leaned up against the wall talking to the band, two girls plastered near the G's. He had completely forgotten about the boy and was happy that way. They all laughed, having great conversation. Georg and Gustav were slightly drunk...okay maybe very drunk but that made it feel even better to be there and hang out with them. Bill only had one drink so although feeling fuzzy he was still fine. Tom felt that way too, as long as Bill was okay he was okay. He believed that for 18 years. 18 years he spent thinking that twin emotions were shared. That was shattered as he saw Britney approach him, looking all around her as she called out someone's name, the band and music being too loud for Tom to hear. When she came closer he felt his heart drop, eyes squinting at her slightly as he still felt mad and jealous about the boy. God dammit, now he was thinking of the boy again!

The rest of the band fixed their posture, looking at her with admiration and a little bit of something else. She was drop dead gorgeous, so Tom understood wh they looked at her dumbfounded. He glared at her, raising an eyebrow. "Hello! I just wanted to say congrats on winning the ____ Award! You guys deserved it!" She smiled happily, making the G's flustered. Before anybody else could say anything, She turned back to Tom, his eyes filled with jealously. "I was just wondering if you knew where my brother, M/N, was.. It's his birthday and I wanted to do something for him." Tom felt himself freeze as his eyes widened, jaw dropping slightly. "M-M/N...?" He asked weakly, not being able to process what he just heard. She smiled softly at him, nodding "Yeah! The boy you talked to earlier. The one with (colored) hair?"

I MIGHTMAKE A PART TWO LATER IT'S MIDNIGHT AND I'M TIRED AF LMAO

#tokio hotel x reader #tokio hotel x male reader #tokio hotel x you #tom kaulitz x male reader #tom kaulitz x you #tom kaulitz x y/n #tom kaulitz x reader #tom kaulitz #male reader #x male reader #x male y/n

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loveroftoomanyfandoms · 8 months

Text

Cooking Up Love, Chapter 4

Pairing: Chef!Matt Murdock x F!Journalist!Reader

Rating: T (for now, might change, probably not)

Story Summary: Here

Warnings/Tags: Hallmark levels of fluffy, cheesy goodness (and speed that their relationship develops, lol), no use of Y/N, Matt is not a vigilante, more tags to come as the story develops

Word Count: ~1600

A/N: Here's chapter 4! If you'd like to be added to the tag list for this story, please let me know!

(Divider made by the insanely talented @theradioactivespidergwen!)

Tag List: @yarrystyleeza @hailey-murdock @mattkinsella @bellaxgiornata @danzer8705 @chezagnes @shouldbestudying41

Early the next afternoon, Ellison called you into his office.

You walked in. "What's up?"

Ellison leaned back in his chair. "I need to talk to you about your article."

Your brow furrowed. You had stayed up half the night working on it (while eating some of what was quite honestly the best tiramisu you had ever had) and had sent a rough draft to Ellison that morning after reading it over. "What about it?"

"Quite frankly, it sucks."

You blinked at him in surprise. "Excuse me?"

"It reads like you literally just transcribed the interview. There's no emotion to it."

"So, what, do you want it in another format, or…" You were hoping Ellison wasn't going to tell you to just forget about it or that he was reassigning the piece back to Kelsie, who was still out sick with food poisoning.

Ellison shook his head. "We need to switch gears. Instead of an interview, I want a full human-interest story." Ellison sat back up. "I want our readers to get to know Chef Murdock as both a chef and as a person. You got a bit of that in your interview, but I want more. Spend as much time with him as possible and do what you do best -- get him to open up to you. Find out what his interests are outside of cooking, how he develops his recipes, where his inspiration comes from. Give me personal details and anecdotes."

You nodded. Your second attempt at an interview had gone a lot smoother than your first -- you had found Chef Murdock had relaxed more the longer the two of you had talked, so you were pretty sure he wouldn't mind sitting down for a more in-depth interview. "Okay."

"Alright, that's it. Get a rough draft of your new article to me by next Wednesday -- that should be enough time to edit before we go to print the following Monday."

"Got it."

Ellison eyed you. "Don't make me regret that raise I agreed to."

You shook your head. "Don't worry, I won't."

You went back to your desk and eyed the clock. You had already been planning on stopping by Daredevil on your way home from work in order to drop Chef Murdock's dish back off to him and was just going to leave it with Karen at the host stand, but since you needed to talk with Chef Murdock anyway...

You pulled out your phone and sent him a text. Sorry to bother you, but I was wondering if I could come by the restaurant to talk with you for a minute before you open?

A few seconds later, your phone chimed. It's not a bother, and sure.

Okay, I'll be by in about 20 minutes.

Sounds good.

You grabbed your bag and Chef Murdock's dish and popped by Ellison's office again. "I'm leaving a bit early so I can go by Daredevil to talk to Chef Murdock."

Ellison nodded. "Okay, see you Monday."

You hurried towards Daredevil, sending Chef Murdock a text as you approached.

A minute later a man with shaggy blonde hair and a friendly face unlocked the door. "Hi, you must be the journalist from the Bulletin, right?"

You nodded and introduced yourself as you stepped inside.

The blond man smiled and stuck his hand out for you to shake. "Matt's signing for a delivery, but he'll be out in just a second. I'm Foggy Nelson, his business partner."

You took his offered hand. "Oh, yes, Chef Nelson. It's nice to meet you too."

Chef Nelson grinned. "So, I heard you were on the receiving end of Matt's apology tiramisu."

You huffed out a laugh. "Oh, uh, yeah, I guess he told you about that. Does he always apologize with tiramisu?"

"Only when he knows he really screwed up." Chef Nelson glanced towards the kitchen before looking back at you. "By the way, thanks for giving him another chance at an interview. Matt can be prickly but he's really a good guy underneath."

You smiled, thinking about how warm and open Chef Murdock had been the previous afternoon compared to your first meeting. "I'm beginning to see that."

"Sorry about that," Chef Murdock's voice said as he came out of the kitchen towards you.

You turned towards him. Today he was wearing a white t-shirt and black pants with his usual red glasses. It's unfair how damn hot he is , you thought to yourself.

You swallowed. "Hi, Chef Murdock."

"Hi," he replied pleasantly. "So what brings you by? Did you have some more questions for me?"

You nodded. "Yes, but I also came by to return your container to you and thank you again for the tiramisu."

Chef Murdock took the empty container with a grin. "I guess that means it wasn't poisoned, then?"

You huffed out a laugh even as your face heated. "I'm sorry about that."

Chef Murdock chuckled. "It's okay."

You shook your head. "In all honesty though I think that that was probably the best thing I've ever eaten. I'll definitely be placing some to-go orders for tiramisu after work."

Chef Murdock smiled. "It's not on the menu yet because I'm still perfecting it, but until then if you let me know in advance I'll be happy to make some for you."

"Matt makes his own ladyfingers from scratch," Chef Nelson chimed in. "That's the secret."

"Well, one of them." Chef Murdock grinned at you. "There's a few other secrets to my tiramisu that not even Foggy knows."

Chef Nelson chuckled. "And with that, I'm going to go get started on the dishes I do know the secrets to."

He gave you a brief nod. "It was very nice meeting you."

"Same to you," you replied.

You waited until Chef Nelson had disappeared into the kitchen before turning back to Chef Murdock. "So about my article… I turned a draft of it into my editor this morning and he said it wasn't personal enough, so he wants me to expand it into a full human-interest story instead of just an interview."

Chef Murdock's brow furrowed. "Oh? What does that consist of?"

"Uh, well… usually with my human-interest pieces I spend time with the person I'm writing about, getting to know them over the course of several days, but since I don't want to take up too much of your time I'd probably just have some more interview questions for you, and if it would be possible I'd like to watch you work in the kitchen for a bit? It doesn't actually have to be during open hours or anything like that, and I'll even sign an NDA if you want me to promising that I won't reveal any of your recipes to anyone."

Chef Murdock pursed his lips as he thought. Finally, he nodded. "Yeah, that's okay."

You huffed out a breath. "Thank you so much. I'm free all weekend, so you can just text or call me and let me know whenever is convenient for you."

"Actually, how about we start tomorrow? Meet me here at, say, 8 AM?"

You nodded. "Okay, yeah, that sounds good."

"Great. I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Thanks again for the tiramisu. It really was fantastic."

Chef Murdock smiled. "You're welcome."

"Okay. Bye."

You turned and walked back into the lobby so Karen could let you out, actually looking forward to seeing Chef Murdock the next morning.

Matt waited until you left then returned to the kitchen, where Foggy was slicing up cucumbers for the dinner salads.

Foggy paused in his prepping. "So… she seems nice."

Matt nodded. "Yeah, she is."

"Pretty, too."

Matt shook his head with a grin. "I wouldn't know."

Foggy chuckled. "Mmhmm. Sure you wouldn't, Matty. That's why you were totally flirting with her just now."

Matt's brow furrowed. "I wasn't flirting."

"I know your tells, Matty -- you like a girl, you cook for her." Foggy dropped his voice into an imitation of Matt's. "'Oh, I can totally make you tiramisu even though it's not on the menu, no problem'."

Matt shook his head. "She's writing an article about me -- of course I'm going to be nice and offer to make tiramisu for her again. Which reminds me, the editor at the Bulletin wants her to expand her interview into a human-interest story."

"Oh hey, that's awesome, man. A full human-interest piece will be great publicity for the restaurant."

Matt nodded. "We're going to meet up tomorrow morning to discuss it."

"Couldn't wait to see her again, huh?"

Matt shook his head. "She wants to watch me cook, so I'm going to have her accompany me to the farmer's market then give her a small cooking demo here afterwards before we start prepping for tomorrow night's service."

"Ah okay, cool."

Matt turned his head towards the receiving door. "Josie's here with the wine order."

Foggy set his knife down as the doorbell rang. "I got it."

"Make sure she's got the Frangelico I added to this week's order, will ya?"

"Sure thing."

Matt sighed to himself as Foggy left to go receive their order. The truth was that he actually was looking forward to spending more time with you. You were kind, and funny, and endearing, and according to Foggy, 'pretty', which admittedly made Matt curious as to what you looked like.

He shook his head. He needed to keep things strictly professional between the two of you. The last time he was interested in a journalist it almost cost him his career and he wasn't going to make that mistake again, no matter how much he was beginning to trust you.

#lotmf writes #Cooking Up Love Masterlist #matt murdock x reader #matt murdock x fem!reader #matt murdock x female reader #matt murdock x you

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kilda · 5 months

Text

how to make a xiao notice you 101 (headcanons for a xiao x gn! reader)

author's notes: hey guys! this is my first post, so it might suck...i'm also writing typing this while i'm supposed to be studying for exams, so...i don't got a schedule as of now. also, lowercase is intended!

stuff: some fluff, slight mentions of an injury (not very detailed), slight pining from the reader, idk anything else

word count: a little more than 500

extra stuff: there might be another part (or parts) to this, since i have to go to sleep at at most 1:00...and there's also the thing that i have school tomorrow and upcoming exams, so i have zero clue when i have the time to update... anyways, enjoy!

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you and xiao first met when you encountered a group of hilichurls. there was probably a meeting there or something, because there were probably over 30 of them. there was also 6 mitachurls in the group.

like the violent adventurer you were born to be, of course you started attacking them. i mean, who wouldn't?

and so, while you were k.o.ing the hilichurls, one of them shot you in the leg with an arrow.

you obviously staggered around and tried to finish off the rest of them, but they were ganging up on you, and either parring your blows with their shields or attacking you.

and so, like every human being that was told about a very specific adeptus, you called out for xiao.

simply put, when he poofed out of thin air, you were shocked.

you didn't expect it to work...but he's here now anyways.

while you were standing there gaping about how in teyvat he was so frickin fine, he turned around to look at you.

he looked at your wound and said five words that changed everything...

".....you are a foolish mortal."

safe to say, you felt offended and complained about how you were not foolish and that you wanted to finish off the hilichurls before they got the chance to possibly harm any of the neighboring nations or if they were up to no good.

....xiao simply just ignored you and just picked you up bridesmaid style and just took you to wangshu inn.

"now, all you have to do is just sit there and rest. verr goldet said that your leg should be better in around a day or two.."

you didn't let xiao leave. not that quick, anyways. how? you simply bribed him with almond tofu.

he stared at you and muttered a quick 'thanks' while looking away, not letting you see his slightly tinted pink face.

you mentally cooed at that and tried not to die of a cuteness overload.

you told him to sit down with you and eat his almond tofu, and then leave if he wanted to because like who would want him to leave?.

he complied, and y'all talked for a bit.

after he finished eating, he said that he had to get back to patrolling liyue, but he appreciated your presence.

you told him that you would call for him again tomorrow, and he just simply nodded and then said a quick 'goodbye' and then poofed off to somewhere.

you said 'bye' to the air and then, feeling tired, went to the wonderful land of sleep.

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a/n: sorry this was so short...i wrote this in maybe 20 minutes lol. i'll try to make it longer next time...anyways, thanks for reading!

#fyp #foryou #foryoupage #fypシ #genshin impact #genshin #xiao x reader #genshin xiao #xiao #x reader #reader insert #gn reader

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k0nstanta · 8 months

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hii!! i was wondering if I could ask what is your usual colouring process? how much time one fully coloured piece and doodle take! I adore your ocs so much they inspire me to draw more myself:3 they feel so alive!

hi anon! thank you vey much, i'm very happy to hear that you feel inspired!

i wrote up a little something for your questions under the cut:

so, first of all, the way i color things ranges from drawing to drawing, especially if i feel like playing around in the process. sometimes i decide to try something out (palette, filter, technique, brush etc) and if i really like how it looks i may recolor the entire drawing lol. point is, there's a lot of sidetracks to my process (especially now, since i'm trying to get used to a different art program than the one i used previously) but the very basics of it are as follows:

1. i sketch and line whatever it is that i want to draw (this might take a while depending on whether i have a solid idea right away or not; in the latter case i might do some thumbnails first to figure out how i want the drawing to look. you can't really see here, but when i line things i usually draw on the same layer as the sketch, and after i'm done i adjust the brightness/contrast settings of the layer to get rid of the sketch underneath. it might seem like i'm just making my life harder this way, especially since this method only works if you sketch with a lighter color (or make it lighter in settings before starting lineart) and your lineart is drawn with a solid opaque brush (which is how i always draw), but it helps me to not get caught up on trying to make the lineart precisely follow the sketch. it also makes changing things on the go much easier, since i only have to erase on one layer.

2. after i'm done lining, i underpaint with a solid color (usually the skin color, but sometimes something random), then block the alpha channel and color over it with flats;

3. i don't color everything at once, instead going piece by piece, which helps to keep the drawing balanced color and contrast wise. i pick a desired area with magic wand and then go about rendering it properly (which usually involves adding some value variance with an airbrush and then laying down shadows/highlights/etc). you can't see this here either, because for some reason i forgot to do it this once, but i also usually lower the opacity of the lineart layer halfway when i color. it helps me concentrate on colors and how they look together better;

4. when i'm satisfied with color, i recolor the lineart to be whatever color i think fits the piece better and change lineart layer settings to either multiply, color burn, or linear burn. after that i just play around with filters, add decorative details, and clean everything up. it's also worth noting that sometimes i starts trying out filters/effects directly while coloring because i want to explore some alternative colors or palettes; i also have a tendency to pick very pale & unsaturated colors so messing around with HSB (hue/saturation/brightness) & depth/contrast settings while coloring helps a lot.

5. cropping it & there you go!

this one took me 1,2 hours. depending on how complex the drawing is it might take me much longer (especially if im working on a commission) so i'd say my average time drawing is somewhere between 2-6 hours. if a drawing takes longer than that i break it apart into several days of work. don't draw for too long! it's bad for your health.

as for sketches, as i mentioned previously, it all depends on whether i know what i want to draw or not, and if i do, i usually just go straight at it:

this one took me 20 minutes. on average, a doodle can take anywhere from 10 to 40 minutes, more if i want to make it look fancy, but at that point it enters the vast limbo between sketch and finished piece.

that's it! sorry the gif quality is really bad, it's the best i could do. here's a video of the same stuff, hopefully in somewhat better resolution

#character: kotya #character: shurik #setting: robot #artist: cbge #askbox #had to cut out footage of me playing with filters bc it was flashing rly bad

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pudgecuddles · 4 months

Text

Proof Of Concept: Mad Science

[It's been a really weird week so what better way to cope than to check in on your magnum opus again? lol]

Namjoon Breast Growth & WG, Jin Route:

Synopsis thus far: Namjoon works for Jin’s company where he was accidentally exposed to a chemical that, unbeknownst to Namjoon, causes breast growth and weight gain. He decides to call Jin for help only for his boss to take him deeper into the facility…

The elevator opened up to a mostly empty, blue walled hallway. Too dizzy to turn his head left or right, all Namjoon could immediately see was a handful of unlabeled metal doors. Interestingly, there were no door handles or visible card scanners to be found. Still helping Namjoon stay upright, Dr. Kim promptly walked them both to the closest door. As the doctor drew near, Namjoon heard a cheerful beep and the door slid open. Proximity sensors? “Here we go, Namjoon-ssi.” Dr. Kim led him to an actually very comfortable, if not pretty large, hospital cot. It was soft and smelt freshly washed. Namjoon flopped backwards in relief. Even with his eyes closed, his head was spinning. “Oh man… Thank you Dr. Kim.” Namjoon sighed. “A minute longer and I think I would have puked.” “It's the least I can do.” Dr. Kim’s voice came from the other side of the bed-like cot. “We want to make sure you’re comfortable during your stay here.” “Oh! You don’t need to worry about that.” Namjoon quickly assures. “I swear, I’ll be out of your hair and back to work as soon as my symptoms improve. I wouldn’t want to trouble you for longer than necessary.” “Hmm,” Dr. Kim didn’t pause in whatever he was fiddling with outside of Namjoon’s vision, “And how are you feeling right now, Namjoon-ssi?” The older man asked, brushing off what his new patient had just said. “Umm…” Namjoon took a second to give himself a small check up, “I’m really dizzy; vertigo, nausea, fever possibly? I’m pretty sweaty and uh- a bit bloated.” Glancing down at his middle, Namjoon saw an puffy bump where a flat stomach should've been. Dr. Kim looked over at that. “Yes, that all lines up. It’s been around 20 minutes after the exposure, are you sure you don’t feel anything else? Just nauseous?” “I really do-” A loud gurgle from Namjoon’s stomach cuts him off. “Oh! Oh god, I am so hungry.” A sudden rush of hunger overtakes Namjoon. “Good, good. That’s typical.” Dr. Kim smiles, reaching down to palpate Namjoon’s belly. His fingers pressed and prodded against the surprisingly soft flesh of his new tummy. “Yes. It seems to be coming long nicely.” Dr. Kim commented, giving Namjoon’s now plush belly a condescending pat, watching it barely wobble. “I-I’m sorry, Dr. Kim, but I don’t understand…” Namjoon whispered. “What’s happening to me?” “Let’s get an IV in you.” Dr. Kim ignored him. “The hunger indicates that your body is asking for nutrients.” “An IV? Can’t I just eat something?” Okay, so he wasn’t going to be getting much information out of the director. Namjoon understood that their client’s serums were supposed to be the private equivalent of state secrets. Of course he wouldn’t be allowed to know what they did… That was what’s happening, right? Dr. Kim began prepping an IV line, pulling out a bag of clear liquid. “Nil per os. Nothing by mouth, young man. Solid food could choke you if you ate too fast. We can’t compromise the process.” Process... Namjoon gulped, half out of nerves, half to swallow down the saliva produced from thinking about food.

“Y-you said no solid food, right? So, something like a protein shake or- or mashed potatoes would be okay then?” Dr. Kim paused, a thoughtful look forming on his face. “I can try it.” He assented, starting to put away the IV. “I’ll have to hook you up with a feeding tube, though. You wont be able to talk.” Any panic Namjoon felt at the thought of being muted for who knows how long they’ll have him hooked up, was washed away by another painful wave of hunger. “Ngh! I don’t care, Doctor! I just need it in me! Please I’m so hungry!” An intense, but unreadable expression appeared on Dr. Kim’s face. “Again.” Namjoon whined, “What?” “Ask me again.” “I’m hungry, Doctor. P-please give me the tube…” Namjoon teared up. The pain was getting worse. Dr. Kim harshly pinched a perky, hardened nipple, eliciting a cut off moan. “You will refer to me as, Sir. Understand?” Namjoon could taste bile in the back of his throat, but he was desperate at this point. “Sir! Please, I need the tube! I’m starving!” Dr. Kim chuckled mockingly, “Starving? With all of this hanging off of you?” He slapped Namjoon’s plush tummy. “Sure, I’ll play along. Here, open wide and don’t choke. We’ll try this without anesthesia first. I don’t want to add another variable to the experiment.” Namjoon’s mouth opened wide, eager to be filled up. The tube slid down impossibly easy, as if Namjoon’s gag reflex had been turned off for the day. The vague feeling of the rubber hitting his stomach was uncomfortable, but the younger man didn’t choke. Dr. Kim moved over to the other side of the actually quite large room. What Namjoon had originally thought was an exit turned out to be double doors to a large walk in refrigerator. Bags of clear fluid, blood, and plasma hung in organized rows. Dr. Kim ignored those however, instead reaching into a plastic bin. The doctor shuffled back over, a massive vacuum sealed bag of beigeish paste craddled in both arms. The thing was huge; four, maybe five liters of the stuff sloshed thickly with every step. Plopping it down on a metal table with a huff, Dr. Kim shook out his arms. “Oh, I have got to get a cart with wheels.” Namjoon absently tongued the bottom of the cold, smooth tube. Dr. Kim pulled the bag closer to the large, metal machine stood behind Namjoon’s bed, out of sight. After what sounded like metal creaking and plastic tearing, Namjoon felt the tube vibrate lightly. Sadly, he couldn’t taste the paste being pumped into him, but Namjoon could definitely feel it settling in his stomach. Finally, Namjoon moaned, eyes rolling into the back of his head. Feels so good... Dr. Kim smiled as Namjoon’s belly began to bloat outwards, the younger man’s eyes barely open. “Enjoying yourself there, Joon-ah?” The nickname sounded belittling coming out of the doctor’s mouth. Namjoon just hummed, suckling needlessly at the rubber between his plump lips.

It’s been a while since I’ve worked on this interactive story, and I’m not even sure if anyone would be interested in it at this point ^_^;

I still desperately want to finish it some day, hopefully before BTS finishes their military service… It’s just hard to find kinky motivation when you’re incapable of feeling arousal in any sense of the word.

Let me know if anyone would even still be interested in reading this!

It will contain 4 routes, 15 branches and 30 endings with a hopeful update for a 5th route featuring JK in the future. I would honestly consider this my most intensive project to date.

Happy to get out this little preview at least!

#pudgeprojects #pudgepreview #// mad science #bts feederism

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empirebae · 2 years

Note

the little laugh or smile a character a does in utter disbelief because character b is just so endearing and sigh(henry/vito?)-Sal

Thank you so much for sending me this! Sorry it took longer than I expected to respond - I've never written Vito or Henry before so this was definitely a challenge lol. I really enjoyed writing it and I hope you enjoy reading it too 💖💖💖

For anyone interested, I'm also posting this on AO3 here

......

Vito stared hard at the black and white tiles in front of him. Only a couple of tiles. That was it. That was all that was standing between him and royalty. But how to cross them?

“It’s not gonna happen.”

“Shut up.”

“It’s not. I don’t know why you went through all the trouble, favoring your pawns the whole game. It’s a shit strategy.”

Vito drew his eyes away from the chessboard for just long enough to shoot a withering glare across the table at Henry. The handsome fucker only gave him a shit-eating grin in return. Bastard. Vito huffed and turned his attention back to the board between them. He’d been staring at it for the past 20 minutes. Fuck. He was never going to win this.

Oh well.

Pawn to G2.

Henry’s eyebrows went up. His lips turned a bit sly. “You going backwards now?”

“Yeah, well, if I go forwards your fuckin’ rook will slaughter him.”

“He’s a pawn, Vito. Pawns are meant to be sacrificed.”

Vito bit his lip. Stared at the little white piece in front of him as Henry moved his rook dangerously closer. Thought about him and Henry, sitting here together in the same hotel where he and Joe had not so long ago killed one of the most powerful men in the city, and all of his most powerful friends. Only a few floors away. Clemente was a king. Or, well, a queen, Vito guessed, if you were thinking about chess. The most important piece on the board. Vito and Joe had still killed him though. Vito didn’t think he and Joe would even count as knights.

“I dunno.” Vito muttered. “I kinda like ‘em. The pawns. They’re underdogs.”

“Underdogs?”

“Yeah, I mean,” he shrugged. “They’re the little guys. But if they get lucky, or I guess, if you play the game right, you can move ‘em all the way across the board. Make ‘em queens too. I like that.”

There were a few moments of silence after that. When it seemed like Henry wasn’t planning on saying anything, Vito glanced up at him, caught the edge of a bemused little smile before Henry covered it up with his hand. He looked away from Vito and chuckled quiet before he cleared his throat. Vito felt his cheeks heat.

“What?”

“Nothing,” Henry said. He shook his head. “Just, I like playing chess with you is all. I’m glad you agreed to play with me. You’ve got a… fresh perspective.”

“Not a very good one, huh?” Vito gestured pointedly at the table between them. There were a good deal more black pieces on the board than white. “I’m terrible at this.”

“Hey, I’m no pro either.”

“You’re still kicking my ass. Sorry I couldn’t offer you a better game. More challenging.” That’s what Henry had been complaining about when he’d brought up chess at the Falcon. Said that ever since his old crew had gotten blown up he had no one to play chess with him anymore, no one to make it a challenge. Vito still wasn’t sure why he’d offered to try; he’d never played chess before in his life. Maybe it was how sad Henry looked, how wistful, or maybe it was because if Vito was honest with himself he’d been looking for more opportunities to spend time with the man, maybe because he wanted to spend more time with Henry alone. Figures he’d be shit at chess and just wind up embarrassing himself. Still, he didn’t regret the offer. Not when it had made Henry’s eyes light up like they did. Not when it had made Henry invite him back to his hotel room.

Henry shrugged, and with the movement his crisp white dress shirt bunched around his shoulders. He’d taken off his suit jacket when he’d let Vito into the suite, tossed it over the back of his armchair. Vito had been trying not to notice too much. It was hard not to though. He had never seen Henry without his suit jacket before. Add that to the list of reasons Vito didn’t regret this.

“It’s only your second match.” Henry said. “You’ll get better with practice.”

“Practice, huh?” Vito grinned, let it reach his eyes. “That an invite to play with you again sometime?”

Henry’s face kind of blanked, like he was startled, with his eyes all wide and his mouth a bit open. He fumbled with a chess piece even though it wasn’t his turn. “I – well – if you’d like to, not that I would ever presume –”

“Henry,” Vito cut him off. He looked at Henry across from him, his jacket tossed over the chair and his necktie loosened. The expensive coffee between them in hotel mugs that Henry had made for them. Their legs brushing together in the small space beneath the table. How Henry’s eyes had lit up at the bar, that bright, surprised look in them. “I’d like that.”

Henry blinked at him a moment. “Oh.” He smiled again, it bloomed slow across his face. This time, he didn’t look away.

“Well then, Vito.” He said, voice all deep, smooth syllables. “Your move.”

#thank you again for the ask!!!!#i hope you like 🥰#vito scaletta #henry tomasino #mafia 2 #vito x henry #henry x vito #fanfic #my writing

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the-rockit · 11 months

Note

I have another drabble request!

what if Orel brought Joe to the arms length dance instead of Christina? It could be interesting!

AHH SORRY THIS TOOK LIKE A BILLION YEARS but here it is!! I think the ending ship might surprise you, a lil', like the last one haha -Very light religious themes(Mentions God a few times) -Very light swearing(I think like one time. Blame Joe, lol)

Christina had just finished getting ready. She had on her blue dress with white puffy sleeves on her blouse. However, she put on a new headband, she put on her red one that had a large bow on. She was practically bouncing for joy, waiting for her prince charming to come. But she didn't tell her family she was going, so it would be odd to wait near the front door so she went to her room to read a book. She looked at the time she must have taken longer than she thought since it was already 6:45, not that she minded. At the most, she only had to wait 15 more minutes for her beloved Orel to come and pick her up.

She sat at her desk, continuing to read a romance novel about a boy and a girl. She sighed happily, thinking about her and Orel. She opened the book and started to read to herself silently. Eventually, she got to this part:

“He kissed her cheek and left. She knew then you could feel homesick for a person, too.”

She held the book close to herself, feeling the fluttering feeling in her stomach and her heart skip a few beats as she thought of her and Orel. She simply must share that with him when he comes.

Speaking of, where was he anyways? She looked up at one of those 1950s black cat clocks that moved its eyes from side to side, that had a clock as its tummy. 7:00.

She gulped. It’s fine, he’s probably still getting ready, she thought to herself. Though, she better put up her book, since he could arrive any moment. She put the book on the shelf delicately and waited for him to appear outside of her window. They had never said they would bring each other to the dance, but, who else would they go with? They only really had each other. She stared out the window as the ticking and tocking from the clock on the wall seemingly grew louder…she looked back at the clock once again. 7:02. She shook her head, she should stop worrying so much. He’ll be here…soon.

She stood up and started pacing around the room, constantly ruffling up and smoothing out the hem of her dress, over and over again, just for something to do. She fidgeted with her dress until she looked at the clock again. 7:10.

If he just got ready, it will take some time, she thought to herself. Though…she couldn’t help the nagging fear in the back of her head...what if something happened? She tried to shake the thoughts away, like a dog with a flea, trying to get it unstuck. Much like a flea, though, it stood its ground in her head.

She went over to the landline in her room, about to call the Puppington residence. As she picked up the phone, she just as quickly slammed it down.

“His father would answer first and if he knows we’re going together, we would both be dead.” She thought out loud to herself.

She sat on the edge of her bed, looking up at the ceiling like she was trying to create a hole through it. She sighed, putting her head in her hands. She tried to resist but…she looked at the cursed clock again which always just intensified her worries. 7:20. Ok, that was it. She stomped out of her room, a bit defeated but still having hope in her heart. She might as well go to the dance herself. Maybe he was already there. In fact, this was better, since now her dad could drive her since her dad wouldn’t be aware of who she was going with. She smiled, it really was quite a smart plan on Orel’s part.

She went over to her dad, who was surprisingly not drinking, and gave the most puppy-dog eyes look she could muster, her eyes twinkling as bright as the lights at a circus tent. She used her softest and sweetest tone of voice for maximum success rate.

“Hey daddy, can I go to that dance tonight?”

“Why? Got a date?” He asked as he took the pipe out of his mouth.

She laughed. “Not yet but daddy plllleeeeaaassseee?”

He looked at her, rolling his eyes. “Get your mother to drive you.” He put the pipe back in his mouth, clearly considering this conversation to be over.

She tried to conceal the amount of excitement in her, but she couldn’t help but give her dad a big hug. “Yay! Thanks, daddy! I love you!”

“Sure do…” He patted her back.

She ran to her mom and before she knew it, they were on the road to the best dance of her life, she was sure of it!

Christina and her mother arrived at the school in around 5 minutes. Sure, she was a little late but she was sure Orel would wait as long as it took. She got out of the car and waved to her mom goodbye. She looked around the building but didn’t see a sight of him. She shrugged. It has been 20 minutes since it started,, he’s probably in there all sad and lonely with nobody to dance with…poor guy, she thought to herself. The thought of Orel all by himself, so lonely, saddened her.

She smoothed out her dress before walking to the school doors. No reverend…odd. She shrugged it off and just looked up at the banner that said the arms-length dance. She took a deep breath and smiled, with her eyebrows pointed downwards slightly. She was determined to have the night of her life. She pushed on the doors of the school, walking in.

She started scoping out the area. She saw many boys and girls there she recognized since she had seen Orel’s friend group before, though never had she formally met them. She started to make her way through the crowd, and soon, by going around people, she recognized the top of his head from a distance. She walked closer to him talking to somebody. She shrugged though, whatever, he had to keep himself not bored before she came along anyways.

“Orel! Hey, Orel! I’m here!” She said happily. Once she got close enough to see Orel and the mystery person, she saw Joe. She was a small bit concerned considering she had seen them being overly friendly before.

She looked at Joe out of the corner of his eye. “Who’s this?” She asked, with a bit of passive aggressiveness to her voice.

“Oh, hey ‘Tina! You’ve never formally met Joe, huh? He’s pretty nifty.”

“...you brought him here, yes?”

“Well, yea. Sorry, I meant to pick you up but…”

She felt her chin tremble. She already had an idea in her mind of what exactly was happening. “Yea. I see what’s happening here.”

“‘Tina…” Orel said softly, putting a hand on her shoulder.

Her gaze sharpened, lightly removing his hand from her shoulder. “Don’t. I know you’re a flit…I should have seen the signs…”

“What? No-Christina he’s my-”

“Yea, I know…your boyfriend…” She sniffled. She already had enough insecurities, and it didn’t help that, in her opinion, Joe was better than her anyways. I mean, Orel and Christina liked each other and all but it seemed to her that she had gotten too boring for him, so he had to go to a bad boy. She doesn’t blame him, she would do the same thing. But at least she would have the gull to tell him.

“No…Christina listen to me…I’m sorry for not telling you but I need to be around him because-”

“Yea, I know because you love him. I don’t care that you’re gay and that you don’t like me, Orel. But…I wish you would have told me beforehand.” She just calmly walked out of the door, and back outside. She didn’t want to put herself and Orel through that conversation, especially in front of everybody. She would save him that embarrassment, at least.

Joe looked at Orel, quirking up his eyebrow. “That’s your girlfriend? When the hell did she become so uptight?”

“She’s not uptight she’s just…worried. Plus, she doesn’t know we’re cousins you know.”

“Still…” Joe huffed out.

“Hey, the night is still young, maybe if we’re lucky, then you can have a girlfriend too.”

“Don’t count on anything…”

Christina ran out to hide behind the school, throwing her headband onto the ground. She slumped down along the wall, hugging her knees. Her dam of tears was cracking every second she thought about Orel, their happy times, and now she would never get to experience that again, seeing as though in her mind she thought she found him “cheating” on her. She didn’t notice how much of this was generated by the own anxieties of her own mind at the time being. Her nose started to twitch and her chin trembled once again. C’mon ‘Tina, don’t cry over a guy! she thought to herself. Orel used to call her ‘Tina…her eyes started to involuntarily fill themselves with tears. No c’mon, don’t cry! Oh how she wished there was a pay phone to call her mother at least then, she would be able to cry in the comfort of her own house.

She looked around quickly, nobody was around, nobody would see her tears fall or hear her woes. Her head filled with more, and more anxiety and regret, like adding too much lemonade powder to a pitcher of water. I’ll never find love again. What if Orel was my special One? What if I completely ruined everything for the trajectory of my life? What if that was a test by God to test our love, and I completely bombed it? That last thought was scarring her the most, and she could not hold back any longer. Her head was soon full of lemonade with no water of positivity to be tasted and her dam of emotional stability exploded.

Tears fell so hard and fast, you would think they were being pulled by the strongest gravity known to mankind and her tears stung like acid, which is a pretty apt description for how she felt on the inside. This was the worst experience she’s had in a long, long time. She hated feeling this way, it was like a worm was eating up every aspect of herself, including her positivity and hope.

Just then, she saw a blonde-haired girl run and push through the doors of the school so hard it could almost blow itself off its hinges. Christina jumped, trying to calm herself down, hoping to God this girl would not come over. She held herself tighter, trying to dry her eyes, though the evidence remained she did indeed cry, like her red eyes and her tear-stained cheeks.

The girl in question started to walk over to Christina, and she seemed to be carrying 2 red solo cups. Christina wanted so badly to get up and hide her shame, to run away from it all, however, not only did she recognize the girl from Orel’s friend group as Marionetta, but she was also frozen in place. Perhaps because some part of herself wanted help and comfort, despite her usual independent disposition.

Marionetta slumped down next to her. She smoothed out her skirt and offered a red solo cup to the crying girl. Christina looked in the cup before taking it, since they were never really close, but it was just an ordinary punch, so she took the cup.

She smiled at her kindness. “Thank you. But why are you helping me?”

“Well, y’know…” She took a sip of her drink. “Girls gotta help girls. Especially with…whatever happened back there.” Despite being one of Orel’s friends, she too did not know that Joe and Orel were merely cousins.

“Yea…” She held her red solo cup in her hands, holding it like it would be the one thing to warm her up, despite the drink being ice cold.

“Hey,” Marionetta started, putting her hand on Christina’s shoulder. “You don’t have to but, you can talk about it if you want.”

“Thank you…it’s just,” Christina slowly leaned onto Marionetta’s shoulder, since she really needed some comfort at the moment. “...sad is all, yknow? I mean, why would he like Joe?”

She blushed a little but smiled. “Hey, it doesn’t matter why he likes Joe, it just matters that he showed his true colors. It’s better to be shown this now than later, plus who needs guys anyways, right?”

“Yea, I guess you’re right but…he was different. He was really sweet an’ all, but yea I’m glad…in a way…that I know this now.” Christina looked at her red face as her face started to dawn a similar shade of red. She quickly sat back up. “O-Oh…um…sorry…” She avoided eye contact, looking down at the individual blades of grass to distract herself from the situation she had put herself in.

Marionetta scratched the back of her head. “No…I don’t…entirely mind…”

Christina’s eyes widened a bit at that but she returned to her shoulder, nuzzling against her. Maybe she really needed that affection or maybe she was just feeling like a love bug bit her as she was looking at the grass. Either way, she felt oddly…safe in her arms. They both just sat there for a few moments, as they took oxygen in with each other, it seemed as though nothing else mattered in the world other than them. They both just stared up at the stars as Marionetta put an arm around her once more, Christina smiled, since it was cute. They shared such a comfortable silence. Despite never really meeting each other until now they like…home with each other.

“I feel…safe…” Marionetta spoke up all of a sudden, a bit absentmindedly. She shifted her gaze from the stars to Christina’s eyes, which were shining just as bright as the stars. “With you…is…is that strange?” She asked with a bit of a chuckle.

Christina looked up at her, shaking her head. “No it’s not weird at all, that’s similar to how I feel as well…”

She smiled down at her, looking at Christina’s headband she threw down earlier. “Hey, do you want to put the headband on?”

Christina looked down at it. “Nah…” Despite this, she still picked it up. She put the headband onto Marionetta’s head. “Here, take this. Think of it of me saying thanks, for being here for me, I won’t get into it but…you provide a lot of comfort I don’t have so,” She giggled. “It might sound silly but, it means a lot that you’re here, listening to me and stuff.”

Marionetta hid her face with her free hand as her face grew warm again at her kindness, but a shy smile peeked between her hand. “...aww that’s too sweet, y’know that? I’m always happy to help.” She said.

Christina just couldn’t help but think how much she felt more at home with her than she ever did at her house. A bit depressing when you think about it, but it was the truth. Scratch that, she didn’t feel at home with Marionetta, she felt…at home, with the universe. She felt like all the planets were aligned in her favor when she was in her arms at least. They let the air blow through their hair with little noise, other than the occasional sounds of them sipping their punch, their shifting to get more comfortable, and the light sound of Marionetta playing with Christina’s hair. It was…nice.

Unfortunately, Christina would be reminded of the real world–specifically, her family–very quickly. They both heard a loud screeching as a car pushed on the brakes a bit too quickly, which made them both jump. They quickly separated from one another, both of their faces still tinted a bit red. Christina, at least, didn’t know why she felt this way, all red-faced with a similar beating of her heart before this whole fiasco started. She released this of her interest at this moment, chalking up to just the sudden adrenaline from the sudden loud noise.

However, as she looked closer at the car she soon realized it was her father’s. “Oh…” She said. “I guess I gotta go.” She said with a frown, standing up and starting to walk toward the car. She knew her dad was not…the most patient person in the world

“Wait!” Marionetta said.

Christina turned around, with a curious little smile.

It looked like she wanted to say more, but she just picked up the red solo cup and handed it to Christina. “You uh…forgot this.” As she handed it over she held onto it a little longer, and Christina grabbed the cup from her hands slowly.

“Thanks, I had fun,” Christina said as she felt her face get hot again. “Boy, I wonder if I have a fever, she thought to herself.

“Me too. See you around.”

Christina waved as she walked to her dad’s car. She got in the back seat, buckling up. He looked tired and didn’t say much and just drove her home. There must have been some reason her mother didn’t come and pick her up, not that she really knew why, but she didn’t let the thought occupy her mind. The entire car ride home, she filled her mind with Marionetta and what happened, how it made her feel. She felt so at peace and cuddly. They didn’t even speak that much but the way she made her feel was all she could think about, even more than her mess of a situation with Orel, which was in reality one big misunderstanding.

Maybe…maybe this night was a blessing in disguise, after all.

The end.

#drabble #fanfiction #fanfics #moral orel #christina #marionetta #orel #joe #moral #fandom #lucyfanficz #lucyaskz #lucyreqz

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sassyandclassy94 · 1 year

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Crush Update (buckle up, girlies. This is gonna be a long one)

Okay so I’ve had a couple days to process and now I’ll fill in my tumblr mutuals that are interested and record it into my little virtual diary.

Last week was really bad. I was really depressed (like really depressed, worse than I’ve felt in a long time) over things that have been said to me about the whole situation. Instead of leaning on and trusting in God I dwelt on words from man. Anyway it all got to be too much, even after two very positive interactions, and by Wednesday it was just… yuck. But Tuesday, I gave things some thought and decided that I was going to try my very darn hardest to actually give Isaiah and the whole situation over to God. And for three and a half days every time he would cross/enter my mind I would try to replace it with scripture - specifically I Peter 5: 6-7 where it says to Cast your cares on Jesus for he cares for you. And it helped. Plus I knew a song from when I was little that used that verse so when he would come into my mind, I’d mentally sing it or recite the verse. And if I wasn’t doing that, I tried to work on my writing. Which also helped. Not to sound like John-Boy but getting out of your own headspace while getting into someone else’s (in my case Baelfire’s) really helps take your mind off your anxieties. If you’re a writer, I really recommend doing that along with prayer. But anyway it helped. I was also telling God that “Okay, he’s yours. I give him over to you. You know what’s going on here and why things have been weird but, he’s yours. You can have him.”

Then Wednesday night my sister’s best friend posted a clip of a guy saying how as soon as you start controlling a situation, the situation controls you and it takes the fun out of the whole thing. If somethings meant to happen it’s gonna happen on its own, smoothly. I don’t think it was from a Christian perspective but God still used it to hit me and penetrate my skull. I cried and told the Lord I’m sorry and that things were going well until I started to control things on my own. Thursday rolled around and it’s getting a little harder to rest in God lol! I was in the shower and I prayed out loud: “Lord, I miss Isaiah… think it’s okay if I send him a text?” And this may sound odd to any of you who are non-Christians but I really felt like God was telling me “Hold off a little longer, child. Be patient.” So I tried. And I worked on more of my writing later too.

Enter Friday. I was at work, when all of a sudden, noon rolls around and I feel my butt vibrate. Now, I’m not technically allowed to have my phone on me during work but since the manager was gone that morning I had it on me in case she needed to get a hold of me or if I had a question and eventually forgot that I had it with me🤷🏻‍♀️ Anyway I figure “Eh, it’s probably a sister.” But as I gave it some thought I realized that my sisters don’t really text me that time of day… so I took it out to look and lo and behold, IT WAS ISAIAH!!! I was so excited!!! My manager was right there and knew what was going on and she goes: “That’s awesome!!! But don’t be a girl!!! Be an adult and… just let him stew and sit there for a while; make him wonder what you’re up to😏 it’ll be good for him.” So I did. I tried to put it out of my mind and even put my phone in my locker during my lunch break so I wouldn’t be tempted to open it. Then I get out of work and of course I’m excited to tell my mom. But then I got to thinking: “What if it’s something stupid like ‘Youth Group is cancelled tonight’ or something church related? Then I lucky stand it any longer and didn’t want to make a fool out of myself to my mom in case it was that. So I opened it and it wasn’t that! His text read: “How’s your week going?” A TEXT SHOWING HE CARES! SHOWING THAT I WAS ON HIS MIND!!!! And it was on his own, out of the blue!!!! It meant to much!! And then when I answered him, he was responding within 20 minutes right up until youth group! It was so much fun! And when I asked him how his is going he actually gave me an in-depth answer instead of the stupid dreaded “Fine.” It was so much fun, I was literally reeling from it most of the weekend!

Then comes Sunday. He was in church on Sunday for both Sunday school and the service because he didn’t have to fill the pulpit elsewhere. Well, during Sunday school our Sunday school teacher took us to 1 Samuel 25, the chapter about Abigail, as an example of wisdom and wise words bringing health to a situation (she talked David down from executing revenge). After Sunday school, my sister Michaiah talked to him a little bit but when he was done, he turned around toward me and said “Hey! Your character was in the lesson today, how about that?” Stupid me thought he meant David cause he’s my favorite person from the Bible and when I said “DAVID??” He goes: “No! Your namesake! Abigail!” I mean GIRLS! There are THREE other Abigails in this church other than me but he thought of ME! ME!😍😍😍 And before that, he made a joke/jab at Michaiah and when he laughed, he looked at me, then laughed a little more after he saw I was laughing at his joke🥰 It was so cute! I can say that right?

Later that Sunday we had a Singspiration - the fifth Sunday of the month is always a Singspiration, it’s fun - and as usual, Isaiah have a hymn story about Blessed Assurance. It was really good, I wish I recorded it cause it was that good. But I didn’t. Anyway, after church I went up to him and told him how much I enjoyed his story. He was very appreciative and told me how he found it (he follows a blog apparently lol) and that led to me asking him if he’ll be teaching Sunday school again this year. He said he will be and he starts next week and I probably showed way too much excitement😂 But you know what? He didn’t care. I think he genuinely liked the compliment and reaction because his face showed genuine appreciation. He didn’t even make a self-deprecating comment about it like he tends to do. He just smiled and took it with grace😍 Then eventually Michaiah joined us and our conversation and it was fun, but before I left I wanted to ask him a private question about depression, asking if he dealt with a similar feeling as I do (that I won’t be disclosing on here, sorry y’all🙈) so I asked my sister to give us some privacy for a minute (and she did, bless her little heart!). But guys it was really nice. He explained a little of how he struggles but you know what? He understood. He didn’t shame me or make me feel like less of a Christian. No, he genuinely understood. I mean of course he does cause he struggles the same way but… you know how refreshing it was to actually talk to someone - the man I’m interested in no less - who gets it?? Aw guys it was really nice, so nice.

God is showing me that hope is still alive and that it’s wrong to give up. Is it frustrating that he hasn’t asked me out yet? Yes. But you know what? I’m okay with that. If he’s the one then it’s gonna happen eventually and there’ll be no stopping it. I just need to rely on and trust God and wait on His timing. (And that’s another thing, God has also been showing me so many verses on being patient and waiting on Him - not just in my devotions but also showing up in my Instagram - that’s another huge reason why I’m so sure He’s telling me to wait)

#the crush chronicles #personal #I don’t know what happened with him last week but I ain’t complaining!!

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mountmasxn · 2 years

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Evenings Like This

just a little thing about soft evenings with Mason.

my first fic so idk if it’s any good. I’m open to taking requests so send them in and I’ll try my best with them! (p.s sorry if this is too long got carried away lol)

You were brought from your thoughts when you heard the door opening and your cockapoo, Toby, jumped from his sleeping position at the bottom of the sofa. From your place in the living room you could hear the commotion and interaction between your now very lively dog and equally as lively boyfriend in the hall way. You decided to call it a day on your uni work, you’d spent the better part of the last few hours trying to make some sort of head way on the essay you had due in 4 days but two paragraphs and a breakdown later you were completely ready to just cuddle on the sofa with your boyfriend and binge Grey’s Anatomy.

Mason made his way into the living room with Toby padding along right behind him, he stopped just behind the sofa to lean down and kiss your head, a ‘Hey you’ being lost in your hair as Mason just paused for a moment. He had a long day. The bad weather in the UK at the minute made training feel ten times longer than normal, his muscles ached and all he wanted was to cuddle on the sofa with you.

‘Hey, how was training?’ you said softly as you would tell by his grip on your shoulders and the lingering kisses on your head that tonight you were gonna have a clingy boyfriend. Not that you minded of course. With Mason’s busy schedule of training and games and then you being flat out at uni, neither of you had had a night in the last few weeks to just enjoy each others company.

‘Was alright, cold and windy though, can’t wait for it to be summer now’ Mason said as he made his way round the sofa to finally get a hug and a proper kiss from you. You hummed in response as you straightened yourself up and moved your laptop and uni work onto the floor to be forgotten about until tomorrow.

You opened your arms for Mason to fall into them and that he did. He collapsed on top of you with a small grunt and his arms instantly went round your waist as you both got comfortable. You could smell his freshly washed hair from his shower after training, a smell thought brought you comfort. Mason bend his head upwards to meet yours and pressed the softest kiss on your lips. Your hand began to thread themselves through his hair and continued to do so as your kiss deepened. There was nothing but innocence behind the exchange, just pure love.

Mason was the first you pull away and give you that doppy smile that you loved so much. ‘You hungry? Cause I’m starvin, was thinking we could order in and have a lazy night. Just don’t tell Tuchel.’ He giggled at the end of his own statement and you couldn’t help but do the same. You nodded your head and gave the faint whisper of a ‘yea’ as you continued to massage his scalp.

You both lay like that for a few minutes before you decided to tap his arse with your leg as a way of telling him to get up and he did so but not without a huff to complain about loosing the closeness the two of you were just enjoying.��‘You wanna order the food while I go do my skincare and change into my jammies?’ You suggested as you stretched out your muscles with your arms being raised above your head. Mason took this as an opportunity to tease you as he started tickling your sides. You let out a surprised laugh and attempted to break free but Mason’s strength prevented you from doing so.

‘I don’t want you to leave me. Just do all that later, I wanna cuddle until the food gets here.’ Mason admitted as he eventually stopped tickling you and simply held in his arms on his lap. His grip was firm and you knew that it wasn’t gonna be easy convincing him that he could survive for 20 minutes without you. ‘Mase,’ you breathed out, ‘I won’t be long but I need to take my make up off, it’s been on since this morning and I feel all gross in my uni clothes.’ Mason chuckled to himself as he looked at what you were wearing; one of his newer hoodies that you had claimed as ‘both of yours’ when he showed it to you last week and a pair of black gym leggings. ‘I don’t think you look or feel gross, I love seeing you in my clothes.’

You let out a sigh, trying to convince your overly clingy boyfriend that he had gotten his way. ‘Yeah, no Mase. I’m gonna go upstairs and get ready for bed while you order our dinner and get Toby his and by that time I’ll be done and I’ll be sitting ready on the sofa, waiting for YOU to chose the movie,’ You had hoped that placing emphasis on ‘you’ it would convince Mason to let you go. And to your surprise it did. Mason loosened his arms around your waist with a huff, ‘Fine, but we are watching Spiderman I don’t care if we have seen it a million times now.’

You let out a small laugh and lent down to press a kiss to his nose then his lips. ‘Okay but don’t complain when I tell you Tom Holland is my celeb crush every 10 minutes.’ And with that you jumped off his lap and began to run up the stairs hearing the shouts coming from your boyfriend, ‘I thought I was your celeb crush!’

When you returned down stairs and made your way into the kitchen to find your boyfriend, you found him leaning over the counter on the Just Eat app paying for the food. ‘See that wasn’t so bad, you survived without me’ you teased as you came up behind Mason to wrap your arms round him. Mason lowered his head as he laughed ‘Actually it was Toby who missed you more, I just wanted a cuddle.’

You were planting small kisses to his neck and jaw as he spoke and hummed to yourself as Mason tried to blame his clinginess on you 10 month old puppy. ‘Well come on then and you get a cuddle before the food gets here.’ You said as you straightened yourself up and wiggled your fingers to get him to take your hand. Mason gladly accepted it as you both made your way into the living room to get comfy on the sofa.

Mason had brought some blankets out into the living room and had Spiderman Far From Home ready to be played on the TV. He settled himself in the corner of the L shaped sofa and opened his arms to let you settle yourself in them. He had his doppy smile on his face again as he admired you in one of his old t-shirts, a pair of jammy shorts with your hair up in a bun and your glasses on. He loved seeing you like this because it was only him that got to see you in the comfort of your own home that you shared together.

‘What are you looking at? Did I forget to blend my moisturiser in or something?’ You asked, still not used to Mason just staring at you even after over 4 years together. ‘No. Nothing. I just like looking at you that’s all.’ You could feel the blush creep onto your cheeks as you got yourself comfy beside Mason. ‘Your so soppy you know that right?’ Mason shook his head and laughed ‘Yeah but only for you so don’t go telling Dec or the boys.’

‘Oh believe me they know how whipped you are.’ You teased him. The two of you settled in to watch the movie, your closeness only breaking when Mason went to the door to get the food and you to the kitchen to get the plates and cutlery. Once you had ate your dinner and left the dishes beside the sink to be cleaned in the morning you cuddled up once again, only this time with Toby having found his way into the middle of the two of you.

‘I really needed this tonight, just the two of us chilling like this.’ Mason admitted as the end credits rolled on the movie. You knew Mason well enough to know that he never admitted to things like that easily but you knew from the moment he walked in the door earlier that he just needed to relax with you and have no other distractions. ‘I know. I needed it too. I love you you know that right.’ You said as Mason just smiled at you nodding, ‘Yeah, I love you too.’ Mason leaned down to kiss you as you enjoyed one of the rare evenings you got together.

#mason mount #mason mount imagine #mason mount imagines #mason mount fanfic #mason mount blurb #mason mount x reader #mason mount one shot #mason #mount #fluff

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channiebbang · 3 years

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just listen, trust me.

synopsis: a misunderstanding drives jaemin away from the only person that he should've trusted. when reality slaps him in the face he feels miserable and tries to win his love back. or something of the sort lol

characters: Jaemin, Main Character, Jeno, and a bit of Haechan, Renjun, Chenle, Mark and Jisung.

pairing: boyfriend!jaemin x f.maincharacter

genre: angst angst angst and fluff

word count: 7k (fucking hell it's THAT long?) sorry lmao

warnings: none

author’s note: this took way too long to finish jfvamejgf but i really couldn't come up with a good enough ending. or more like i couldn't write down what i wanted to write lol but i finally finished it heheh i hope you like it and it satisfies the wait i made you go through lol 💛💛

the many things people told him echoed in his head. the dimmed lights of his studio room and the slow, low beat of the music not doing much to brighten up his mood.

she's being too friendly with that one friend of yours, don't you think?

he's warming up too much to her.

watch out, you wouldn't want someone to whisk her away from you, she is a bit naive, she could be affected too easily.

and it would all have fallen to deaf ears, because he was never one to let anyone talk about his personal life, only if one of his closest friends hadn't said something.

"jaem," jeno's voice made jaemin turn to his friend. jeno looked around to their other friends before figuring out they wouldn't let what he was going to say out of the circle.

"yeah," jaemin smiled at jeno, remnants of his laugher from what renjun was saying. jeno cleared his throat still unsure how to approach the topic.

as soon as the news reached his ears he had searched for his friend. he was unsure of the news but he figured jaemin could always ask y/n and they would solve things if it were to be lies. what jeno didn't know at the time was all the other stuff jaemin had heard.

"listen," jeno started, tongue darting out to wet his dry lips, "i.. people are saying some stuff and i-," he cleared his throat again, in nervousness, "i thought i should let you know. i don't think they are true at all! but... one can never be too sure, right?" he asked, voice unsure as his eyes darted to meet jaemin's. the latter's brows furrowed in confusion, wondering what the hell jeno was talking about and he was just about to ask when he continued.

"in case it's wrong then you guys can always just clear it out but i heard this from someone close and thought i would let you know either ways," jeno's hand scratched his neck in nervousness.

"just fucking say it, oh my god," chenle huffed, impatient with the suspense the older was building up.

"i swear to god, if you say something like a joke," haechan warned, mark snorting.

"i'm serious, just," jeno groaned, wondering why he had to be the one to break the news.

"just tell me, jeno," jaemin smiled and jeno felt the already heavy load on his shoulder get 20 kgs heavier. he took a deep breath. all in one go, he thought, just like a band aid.

"y/n is cheating on you."

and jaemin's world fell apart.

everyone could have been wrong but jeno? could jeno be wrong too?

silence. total silence followed as jaemin's smile fell and his eyes stared ahead to jeno but not really.

he thought about y/n, thought if he could picture her doing anything like than and the answer came right away, even before he finished his thought. no. just no. she could never. but they always said it's the people you least expect it from. but y/n? she could never... right?

"what the fuck are you talking about?" it was mark who had spoken, the defensive tone evident in voice as he did nothing to mask it and jeno looked away from jaemin's eyes to the eldest.

"y/n could never, she's not like that," renjun chuckled drily, in disbelief.

"jeno, are you sure about this?" haechan raised a hand in front of him to assess the grave situation.

"that's what i said. i heard this from someone who's reliable, i can't say who, though."

jaemin cleared his throat catching everyone's attention. he gulped the lump in his throat before he looked around the group.

"i'll handle this, don't worry."

that was all he said but even if he sounded calm and collected, his eyes said a different story, and his clenched jaw showed a different side of the coin. and as much as they wanted to believe he would handle it with care with y/n, they saw the storm coming even before he did. because jaemin's eyes were on fire, he was aflame. and that uncertainty he had before had just been consumed with jeno's confirmation. jaemin's tipping point was reached. as he turned to walk away a hand grasped his arm.

"jaemin," it was jisung, jaemin waited for him to go on.

"she would never do that." was all he said.

the ding of his phone's notification brought him back from the memory. he reached out to his phone deciding this could no longer be avoided. he was determined enough. with these thoughts running in his head he dialed y/n's number and pressed the phone to his ear.

"hello? jaem?" she answered, and he sighed because how could she sound so angelic, and how was he supposed to confront her when he felt his heart tighten just by her voice. he sucked up the weakness he felt for her when she called out his name again.

"hey, where are you?" he asked softly, but no matter how much he tried to conceal it, the coldness in his voice seeped through.

"i'm at the cafe near my apartment with kyunhae," she giggled and at the mention of the name jaemin saw red. what the fuck was she doing with him?

"when will you be done? i need to talk to you," he deadpanned, voice colder than y/n had ever heard and she felt at alert right away. why was he talking like that?

"jaem?" wonder laced her voice as she silently asked what was up but jaemin said nothing.

"it's urgent," he specified and y/n had asked him to pick her up right away, sensing something was wrong. and jaemin was left confused to stare at his phone again.

how long are you gonna pretend you care about me? why are you doing me this dirty? why are you faking caring about me?

with those thoughts he had gotten up, whisked his jacket from behind his bedroom door and out of the house he was.

as he drove through the streets he tried to think again, he tried to figure out again if she could really have cheated on him. he was desperate for it to be a lie but then again, jeno had confirmed it, hadn't he?

could the girl that held him so tightly when they slept, cheat on him? could the girl he grew to love so much do this to him? how could she even think about it when she cried during children's movies, had ice cream cravings out of nowhere, cried in his arms, clinging to him when he had almost fainted from low blood pressure, helped him stand back on his feet whenever he was sick, babying him through the whole process. how could she cheat on him when she kissed him so softly, as if he was the most precious thing she had, when she held him so close as he murmured sweet nothings in her ears, when she looked at him with so much love when he smiled, when right as he laughed he would look over at her and she would be staring at him. her excuse? she loved seeing him happy. how could the same person that confessed her love for him in between shallow breaths, gasps and whines as he made her feel good be the same person to cheat. how could she make him feel so loved and so important if it was all fake.

it took him a total of twenty minutes to reach the cafe. he parked the car outside as he texted y/n he was out front. he waited for her leaned against the side of his car.

the door to the entrance to the cafe opened and y/n walked out first, face turned behind her as she laughed with kyunhae. jaemin's hands balled into fists as he watched the interaction, the anger swam in his veins as he watched y/n collide her fist against his in a fist bump before calling out a text me later.

y/n turned out front to jaemin and the way her eyes seemed to genuinely spark up in bright stars as soon she saw him had his heart clenching in pain. how long have you been mastering this act? how can you look this genuine?

"hi, handsome," she gushed as she pressed her chest to his, arms wrapping around his neck as she pressed a soft kiss to his jaw. jaemin gulped, eyes trained to her relaxed expression, eyes closed and a soft smile on her lips as she hugged him standing on her tippy toes. his arms shoot out out of habit as they went to wrap around her waist before his hands hovered over her frame. he couldn't do it. he couldn't pretend everything was okay.

as y/n didn't feel jaemin hug her back she pulled away slowly, her eyes looking up at him as her arms slowly fell away from him.

"jaem?" she softly called him and his eyes met hers, cold as ever. her hand raised to rest on his cheek in affection but before she could touch his skin, his fingers wrapped around her wrist and stopped her in her tracks. y/n's brows furrowed in confusion.

"let's go," he simply said as he stepped away and opened the passenger seat door for her, y/n looked at him for a few seconds more as he looked to the side and waited for her to get in, so she did.

the silence was eating y/n alive as she fidgeted with her fingers, suspecting something was wrong. she raked her brain, wondering if she did or said anything wrong but it all came empty.

"jaem?" she tentatively called for him. jaemin waited for a few seconds before he hummed in acknowledgement, but even that small sound seemed cold, colder than he had ever been.

"is something wrong?" she softly asked, hand reaching out to grasp his and intertwining their fingers before resting it on her lap. but as soon as the back of his hand rested against her jeans clad thigh he shook off her hand to grasp the wheel again.

she sat frozen, eyes trained where their hands were, her hand still in her lap the same way he had shook it off. what did i do so bad? she wondered.

"i'm driving," came his excuse but she knew something else was up. he had never rejected her touch like this.

"if something is wrong please tell me, i'll help you," she shook off the hurt before turning to him and sending a small smile, eyes pleading, but jaemin stared ahead, silent.

a few minutes later jaemin parked the car in his apartment building garage before swiftly getting out and waiting for y/n. it took her a few seconds before she was out too. they made their way to the elevators. the elevator came, they got in, and it went up to jaemin and his friend's apartment floor. all in silence.

jaemin walked in first, leaving the door open for y/n. as she closed the door behind her she made eye contact with jisung. the boy smiled warmly at the girl and stepped towards her.

"oh! didn't know you were coming over, want some?" he raised the hot pot of ramen, seemingly on the way to his room, and y/n smiled shaking her head as she took her shoes off.

"i ate, but thank you," she smiled warmly and jisung threw her a thumbs up before walking to his room and closing the door.

y/n walked into the apartment looking around for which way jaemin went before her eyes fell on his seated figure in the living room. everyone seemed to be in their own rooms apart from mark, who stood in the kitchen.

"hey," he waved, a warm smile on his lips before his eyes shifted jaemin and his smile dimmed a bit, y/n waved back.

she shuffled towards jaemin, still confused as to what happened.

"jaemin?" she called for him, his head snapped her way before he slowly stood up.

"do you have anything to tell me?" he asked and y/n thought hard and careful if she had forgotten anything but came up with nothing so she timidly shook her head, hands picking at the border of her tshirt. the one that belonged to jaemin.

"did i forget anything?" she murmured, head low as she felt guilty for forgetting something that affected him so much.

"you have nothing to tell me?" he repeated, a scoff following and y/n looked back up at him, her brows furrowed.

"okay, let me ask you this," he said, hands resting on his hips as he looked up at the ceiling. mark watched, debating whether he should leave or not, but then choosing against it, someone had to try and do damage control.

"what is kyunhae to you?" at the new question y/n's brows furrowed even more.

"jaem what are you reaching at?" she asked, confusion eating her alive. jaemin's eyes sent daggers her way and she realized that she never wanted to have that gaze on her ever again.

"answer my question; what. is. kyunhae. to. you?" he asked again, emphasizing his words. the agitation clear in his voice as he ran a hand through his hair. mark stepped into the living room area.

"jaemin, chill," he tried to calm the younger and prevent him from saying anything he would regret later. this wasn't how he thought jaemin would handle things.

"why can't she just answer?!" jaemin exclaimed. the more she delayed her answer the more anger rose in him. her lips quivered seeing a jaemin she had never seen. he had never talked to her like that, with so much hartred.

"he's just a friend! that's all! why are you asking me that!" she answered, her voice a notch higher as she felt attacked. the way he talked to her made her feel defensive. she had never felt attacked by him and she was scared, she didn't know what happened, why he was acting like that. but no matter how naive she was she wasn't stupid.

she heard what people said about her, she knew things reached jaemin's ears in the past and she had done everything in her power to show him he was the only person she loved, only person she cared about. that he was her everything, her all. she had gifted him with a matching promise ring, to reassure him that she was his, always will be. she had told him not to listen to anyone, only her. she loved him, she really did. that's why she always told him when she would be out with kyunhae, she wanted him to know that whenever he needed it she will drop him and come running to jaemin. because jaemin was her priority. she had told him about meeting him today too but jaemin had forgotten it seems.

"then why the fuck do i hear different things?" he all but screamed and y/n stood frozen on her spot, scared. he had never raised his voice at her, much less in the process of accusing her of anything.

"i swear jaem," her voice came out in a trembled whisper as jaemin breathed heavily, "none of it is true, i swear," she pleaded, her eyes stinging in desperation. she needed him to believe her.

"you're lying," he shook his head, an empty chuckle leaving his lips as he threw his head back in disbelief and anger, "you've been lying for who knows how long," he muttered and y/n's brows furrowed, offended.

"i have never lied to you," she breathed out, before she remembered mark standing nearby. she took two quick steps towards him, taking a hold of his hand softly, "jaem, let's talk about it in your room, okay? let's solve this," she pleaded as she softly pulled his hand but jaemin snatched his arm away from her.

"no," he shook his head, "we're gonna do it here, so you can't lie to me anymore," his voice rose as he pointed around him and y/n's eyes blurred in frustration and hurt. how could he be like this.

"jaem what has gotten into you?" she asked, voice a tremble as the first tears threatened to spill, "please, i don't want to lose you, let's calm down and talk about this," she pleaded again.

"if you didn't want to lose me you should've thought about it before you cheated on me!"

y/n felt her heart break at his words, she felt like he had pushed her off of a building, she felt like the ground was snatched from under her feet and she was left falling into the void. the emotion swam in her expression.

"what's going on?"

mark's head snapped towards renjun and haechan's figures as they stepped out of their rooms and into the living room, eyes widened in alarm shifting from y/n to jaemin and then to mark.

mark shook his head. the three looked at y/n, her emotions set on her face and they knew right away they had the whole situation wrong. jaemin had it wrong.

she didn't look alarmed, caught in the act or guilty, she looked down right betrayed, hurt, and deceived.

"i did nothing of the sort, jaemin," her voice came out offended, disbelief swimming in her tone.

"jaem," haechan walked in front of his friend, partially blocking y/n's view, "that's enough, calm down," he muttered lowly, only jaemin hearing him. jaemin shook his head as he pushed haechan away softly.

"no, i need to know why," he insisted, "why would you do that to me? why not just tell me?" he asked again.

"i didn't do anything! i understand you heard it somewhere but hell, jaemin, at least ask me before you assume the worst!" she exclaimed her arms raising and dropping by her sides.

"and you're still fucking lying to me!" he raised his voice again in exasperation.

"i have no reason to lie to you! why are you saying all this to me? how could i ever do that to you, jaem?" her voice grew quiet at the end, just the thought of his implications finally sending the tears tumbling down her cheeks. jaemin scoffed.

"exactly, how could you do that to me?! all i ever did was treat you with care, i always put you first!" he countered again, the vein in his neck popping.

"jaem, you're not listening to me, please, just listen to me," she pleaded a sob escaping her lips as she stepped closer t him, her hands grasping his cheeks in desperation for him to look at her eyes, to believe her, "i love you, i would never ever do anything like that, please trust me, let them all be, just trust me."

but jaemin took a hold of her hands and let them fall in between them.

"what if it's someone close to me that told me," he scoffed stepping away.

"jaemin don't," renjun interfered, standing in front of y/n, blocking her completely from jaemin's eyes.

"just go home y/n," jaemin shook his head as his fingers ran trough his hair and he turned away.

"yah, you're exaggerating," mark called him out and jaemin threw him a glance.

"then why bring me here? why do this in front of everyone when you could've done that when you met me, why this whole thing?" she asked quietly. she didn't know what she felt, she didn't know who this person in front of her even was.

she understood jaemin, she really did. hearing so many things from so many people must've played with his head, she understood it. but fucking hell she wished he had talked to her about it, about all of it. she wished he didn't lash out on her, she wished he had just remembered who she was and how much she loved him. she was a person too, wasn't she? she could get hurt too, right?

when jaemin didn't answer she hurriedly turned around, making her way to the door. she fleetingly saw the youngest two silently standing in front of their door at the commotion but she paid no mind to that. all she wanted was to go away. y/n felt so lost, so betrayed; why didn't he believe her? why didn't he just ask her?

"y/n wait-" haechan tried to call back the girl but she was already out of the door, quickly walking to the elevator and pressing repeatedly on the button.

"fucking hell jaem, is this how you planned to handle it? really?" renjun scolded the black haired guy. jaemin sat on the couch, head in his hands and eyes brimming with tears. suspiciously all their phones dinged one after the other. chenle and jisung looking at each other in confusion as they were the only ones to notice.

mark ran out of the apartment slowly coming to a stop in beside of y/n. she kept her head down, tears dripping on the floor from the tip of her nose as she sniffled.

"y/n," mark took a hold of her elbow, "wait for a second, you can't leave alone. it's late, I'll take you home, hmm?" he tried to persuade her softly, careful not to be too loud. but she shook her head.

"thank you, but i need to be alone," she whispered, her shoulder shaking as she took in a harsh breath. mark's eyes softened.

"let me call you an uber, at least?" he offered again, hand caressing her hair in affection but she shook her head again.

"I'll be okay," she muttered as the doors to the elevator dinged and opened. y/n took a step forward before coming to a stop when another pair of shoes came into her view, she stepped aside muttering a sorry.

"oh, y/n..?" jeno's voice was surprised, his phone held on his hand and his eyes wide. he looked at mark, who held the most disappointed look on his face, brows furrowed. jeno looked back at y/n in confusion.

she looked up at his voice and the sight of her wet cheeks, red nose and swollen eyes sent an alarm to jeno. his eyes widened as he stammered.

"fuck, y/n, I'm so sorry- i didn't know-" jeno was at a loss of words as realization dawned on y/n and she smiled bitterly.

"it's okay," she simply said as she walked into the elevator and waited for the doors to close.

jaemin looked up as mark and jeno walked into the apartment, just at the same time as jisung and chenle stumbled out of their rooms, phone grasping in their hands.

"hyung, you gotta see this," chenle shoved his phone into jaemin's face. the latter took in a deep breath, taking the phone from the younger.

"jaem," jeno muttered, eyes remorseful, "i'm so sorry," he solemnly muttered out, and jaemin furrowed his brows in confusion before looking at the screen of chenle's phone.

under the instagram picture, written in bold letters, the words "SHE SAID YES" and the small line underneath "thank you y/n for helping me make it even more memorable" were mocking him. and as jaemin ran his fingers through his hair for the nth time that evening and gripped his roots in a vice like grip, his eyes scanned the picture. the picture of kyunhee and who he assumed was his fiancé now. jaemin felt like the biggest idiot in the planet.

so as y/n helped kyunhee with the preparations of his engagement party with the biggest smile she could muster up, the happiness she painted on didn't quite reach her eyes. jaemin had tried again and again to contact her but y/n made it a point to ignore all his texts and all his calls, only using her phone when extremely needed.

she helped her dear friend through the whole process, never missing a beat to tell him and the lucky girl how proud she was of them both.

kyunhee felt guilty taking her help, so much so that y/n had screamed at him to not give her the pity look. she had explained that she needed the distraction and after much thought he let her handle whatever she wanted.

he told himself if he ever came face to face with jaemin he would've made him taste his fist, but he knew they would resolve their misunderstanding. of course they would, they loved each other infinitly after all.

y/n was surprised when two days after the break up her mother came knocking on her door. at first she had thought jaemin had called her and as soon as she was about to send her mother away, the older woman had told, "i knew something wasn't right, i could feel it." and so y/n had her dearest mother at her apartment, making sure she got the energy she needed and she ate well.

jaemin on the other hand was lost. completely lost. he beat himself up for how he had talked to y/n, he scolded himself for not having talked it out. he regretted not listening to her when she was asking for him to listen.

he tried calling her a thousand times. he tried texting her from the boys' phones and every time he would let a dry laugh out when she would reply "tell jaem i don't want to speak." he knew his girl knew him too well and he felt worse every time because how did he let go of her? what an idiot.

so it was with a heavy heart and jaw clenched in embarrassment that jaemin was standing in front of a building, waiting for the one he misunderstood. truth be told, he was nervous, for what he still didn't know but he had a hunch.

"jaemin," a voice pulled him out of his thoughts and jaemin turned to his right to come face to face with a poker face kyunhee. he cleared his voice, holding out his hand for a handshake.

"hey, i hope i didn't mess up your schedule, i can only imagine how busy you are," jaemin smiled a tight lipped smile. kyunhee stared at him for a second before deciding to be cooperative for y/n's sake. he grasped jaemin's hand and gave it a firm shake before letting go.

"you technically did," he sighed, jaemin's brows furrowed, a confused sound leaving his lips, "mess up my schedule. i had an appointment i had to cancel," kyunhee said, arms crossing over his chest. jaemin blinked for a few seconds before muttering a soft sorry in embarrassment. silence fell upon the two guys. kyunhee's eyes stayed put on jaemin's wavering ones. he could practically see the wheels turning in the black haired guy.

"what the hell are you guys doing?" kyunhee sighed then. jaemin's eyes snapped on him, eyes wide in alarm.

"i-i'm very sorry for misunderstanding your intentions. i really am," jaemin blabbed, kyunhee rolled his eyes.

"why are you apologizing to me when the person you should apologize to is somewhere else?" kyunhee asked as a matter of fact.

"she doesn't want to talk to me," jaemin whispered, eyes looking away and jaw clenching. kyunhee scoffed catching jaemin's attention again.

"yeah no shit she doesn't," the newly engaged one spat out and jaemin let out a humorless snicker, head nodding.

"you acted like a total dick to her, i don't even know how she hasn't blocked you yet," kyunhee shot again and jaemin listened, for he knew he deserved it. the former's eyes softened for a second at jaemin's obvious miserable eyes, before hardening again.

"oi, dickhead," he called jaemin, foot kicking at his shin, jaemin ducked to hold his shin out of instinct, eyes snapping up in despair.

"oi! what was that for?" he called.

"i won't tell you to go to her place and beg for forgiveness, because quite frankly, that's not going to work," kyunhee deadpanned and jaemin nodded, hanging to his every word.

"give her time, jaemin, she's hurt," he continued.

jaemin stared at the floor at his feet as he thought. guilt enveloping him in its arms as usual these days. he took a deep breath again and looked up at his girlfriend's friend, he offered a small smile.

"thank you, really," jaemin muttered, genuine gratefulness in his voice, "for holding her up, i know it should've been me but i'm glad she has a friend like you, i'm really sorry again."

"it's okay, don't worry about it. just think about what kind of pose you need to hold when you're begging on your knees for her forgiveness," kyunhee bit back in a lighter tone, feeling weird about all the formality. jaemin snorted the real smile in a while, grateful kyunhee got rid of the heavy serious air around them.

"congratulations on your engagement, by the way," jaemin clapped the side of kyunhee's arm and the latter thanked him, before a thought hit him and his eyes squinted as he looked at jaemin.

"uhhh why are you looking at me like that?" the black haired one asked, an unsure tone to his voice.

"you know what? why don't you..."

"the place looks so pretty!" y/n turned to her mother with a proud smile as the older woman looked around the engagement party venue with sparkling eyes, "you did a great job, love," she turned to y/n and lovingly caressed her face.

"thank you, mom," y/n giggled, her hand grasping her mom's as they made their way through the crowd.

the venue was decorated in hues of white and lilacs, the stage at the front of it was decorated with fresh flowers and thin branches giving it a very fresh look.

her eyes lit up when she saw her dear friend and his fiancé in the distance.

"let's go say hi to kyunhee," she told her mother as they made their way towards the couple.

it was thirty minutes later, when y/n was enjoying her time with a few friends and their families that the murmurs started.

at first y/n didn't pay any attention to it because who cares if a handsome guy was at the party, she was already taken. well. not anymore, but that didn't change the fact that her heart lay where jaemin was.

so imagine her surprise when she turned around to look around the place and her eyes fell on none other than the handsome guy everyone was talking about. na jaemin.

as soon as their eyes met y/n's head snapped towards kyunhee a few meters away, talking to another guest, and the piece of shit had the audacity to smile at her and throw a wink before returning his eyes to the guest.

jaemin slowly came to a stop beside her, back as straight as a wooden plank, shoulders tense. he threw a tight lipped smile around the few people surrounding him as he greeted them.

"jaemin dear?" y/n's mother's eyes sparked up in adoration and y/n smiled softly at the scene as her mom engulfed a chuckling jaemin in her arms, hands grasping his face softly as she gushed over him.

"how long it has been, love, how are you?" she asked and jaemin chuckled before patting her back and stood back up straight to look at her.

"too long, sorry i couldn't come to say hi sooner, i was stuck with all the assignments i pushed back," he apologized, ever the gentleman and y/n's eyes stung a bit as she blinked.

"ahh you study so well, but don't neglect your health," she smiled again as she hugged him tighter and jaemin nodded hugging her back. what he didn't expect was the words the older woman whispered in his ear as she pulled away.

"make things right, love, fight for each other," and she gave him the most loving smile as she said something about enjoying the evening and walked to a group of ladies.

jaemin's eyes fell on y/n and she looked away as jaemin stepped up beside her as she pulled away from the small group, saying something about getting a glass of prosecco.

she threw him a side glance as she stopped at the table.

"why are you following me," at the sound of her voice jaemin let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. his hand twitched to hold hers.

"i wanted some prosecco," he muttered and a small smile pulled at his lips when she blushed in embarrassment before nodding and moving away with the glass in her hand, jaemin doing the same. the two stood at the side in silence.

"y/n," jaemin called after a while and y/n hummed, her eyes trained to the live band, "i'm very sorry," he whispered. y/n stopped in the middle of taking a sip before detaching the glass from her lips.

"i don't want to talk about it, jaem," she muttered before taking the sip, finishing the content in the flute all in one go. jaemin's hand rested against the back of her waist in reflex.

"slow, you're gonna get dizzy," he muttered and y/n could hear the worry in his tone, and she hated it because how could he sound like that after all he had said.

there were a few things that put jaemin's worry at rest. that assured him that y/n was still is girl. he felt a small smile tug at his lips when she called him by his nickname, when she didn't push away his hand on her waist, his chest puffed out, and when she nodded at his words of worry he felt himself relax a bit.

"you're beautiful," he muttered loud enough for only y/n to hear as he took a sip of his prosecco, eyes set on her as she turned around with narrowed eyes, only to blush like crazy when her eyes met his. jaemin's eyes held an intimacy she couldn't hold right now. he let out a deep chuckle when her chest and neck set up in flames.

they stood there side by side as they watched the many couples dancing. jaemin's eyes would settle on her every few seconds, so much so that she could feel it every time.

"what are you two doing?" y/n's mother's voice made the couple's head snap to the side. y/n made sure a soft smile settled on her lips as her mother's friends followed her.

"who's this, y/n?" one of them asked, curious eyes settled onto jaemin, the latter giving a polite smile and a bow as he muttered his hellos. before y/n could answer, her mother chimed in.

"oh! this is jaemin, i told you about him! he's my daughter's boyfriend, such a gem, let me tell you. sweetest boy i ever met," she gushed, and y/n's panic stricken eyes met jaemin's smiling ones. her eyes narrowed at his pleased look.

"oh my, he's so gorgeous! you're absolutely stunning, dear!" one of the women smiled as she caressed his cheek and jaemin chuckled, muttering a thank you.

"well, what are you two doing here? go for a dance!" y/n's mother ushered as she pushed them to the clearing, where other couples were dancing.

y/n made to protest and push back but her words got swallowed up by the encouraging giggling of the older women as they stumbled upon the floor.

y/n looked at jaemin as he settled his prosecco flute on the tray of a passing waiter.

a few minutes later the two found themselves slowly swaying to the music. one of y/n's hands in jaemin's as his other hand rested against the middle of her back. his thumb brushed slowly in a comforting manner, so much so that y/n found herself stopping from leaning her head on his shoulder out of instict.

jaemin's eyes stayed on her features as hers looked anywhere but him. his heart hurt that she didn't want to even look at him, but he also understood. he had hurt her deeply, after all.

"y/n," he called, voice loud enough only for her to hear. she hummed in acknowledgment, "look at me," he tapped his thumb against her back and she reluctantly looked up at him.

"i'm sorry," he squeezed her hand, and she remained silent. she didn't know what to say. what do you say to sorry when you can't say it's okay? do you ignore it? do you say i heard you? do you just nod? what do you do?

people say sorry and expect everything to be fine, they say sorry when they know the answer is going to be it's okay. but, to y/n it wasn't okay, it couldn't be okay. she didn't know if it would be anytime soon or anything. all she knew was that she was hurt, extremely hurt. so she couldn't say it's okay.

she loved jaemin tremendously. so much so it was scary. she loved him so much her chest hurt sometimes, her lungs felt like giving out and her heart felt like squeezing the life out of it. it was painful how much she actually loved him. she felt like crying if she didn't ignore how much she actually loved him.

not because it was unhealthy, but because she knew she would give it all up for him. she couldn't dwell too much on the love she harbored for him, she just had to live with the knowledge that she loved him a lot. she knew if she tried to think about how much she loved him she would cry so much it would worry him. and she didn't know how she could ever explain that.

because how do you explain to someone you love them so much you want to cry because your heart hurts, it hurts so much because even your heart is too small to contain that much love. because you love everything about them, all of it. and you know how cheesy it is when people list out all the reasons why they love someone but your love is different; you can't pin point what exactly you love, you can't pin point what makes you happy about them, and you can't bring yourself to just find one physical attribute you love about them because that would be a lie, because that's not why you love them, and you can't say personality because as much as that's the closest thing as to why you love them, it's not quite there yet.

you just love them. the essence of what and who they are, with all their flaws and imperfections and all things perfect, it's just them entirely. it's their ability to smile when they're hurting, it's the way they make mistakes and they learn, the way they just are. and you can't explain it so you just accept it that when someone asks why you love them you'll just have to say a measly i love everything about them, and as cute as that sounds it's so basic and so underwhelming to what you actually feel but that's all that you're able to say.

so y/n stared at jaemin's eyes and her eyes stung and moistened up because she could feel her heart hurting, because she let herself actually feel how much she loved him. yes, he hurt her. yes, she was in pain. but the pain she felt from loving him was so much greater and so much more overwhelming.

jaemin was quick to softly push his hand on her back and encourage her to rest her head on his shoulder, knowing how much she hated crying in public. she gladly took the support, resting her forehead on his shoulder. he hushed her as his lips pressed against her hair.

"you hurt me," she said, and jaemin rested her hand clasped in his on his other shoulder, fingers squeezing hers, arm tightening around her back.

"i know, i'm so sorry, really, i'm so sorry, princess," he muttered, lips pressed to her hair.

"i felt like i lost everything," she started, voice trembling as she forced herself to not cry, "everything we build up, everything we went through, i felt like i lost all of it. i tried to care so much for you, i tried to show you how much i loved so hard, but i-" her voice choked, "-i felt like i lost it all, and you wouldn't even listen to me. i was so alone, i felt so alone," she continued, and jaemin's eyes stung as he listened to her, because that was all she needed; for him to listen to her.

he brought her hands behind his neck as he grasped her face in his hands and pulled her back to look her in the eyes. he sent her a soft smile as his thumbs caressed her cheeks.

"i'm so sorry i made you feel like that. i'm an absolute asshole,-" "yes you are," he chuckled as she interrupted him, "i will make it up to you. i swear, i will, please accept my apologies."

his lips downturned as she shook her head before his brows furrowed in confusion when she rested her head back on his shoulder and crossed her fingers at the back of his neck.

"make it up to me and maybe i will," she spoke softly and jaemin smiled fondly as he rest one arm around her waist and the other rose up to caress her head lovingly, and y/n's eyes closed at the action, a smile pulling at her lips.

"deal," he chuckled, before he smiled teasingly, "i'm surprised you didn't cry, you crybaby," he teased and she mutter a fuck you.

"why would i cry," she scoffed and jaemin laughed at her words.

after a beat of silence, "i read somewhere if you clench your butthole right when you're about to cry it stops the waterworks, guess it works."

and jaemin laughed loudly as she shook in his arms from her own laughter.

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