#soul made me reevaluate my life choices

[poemnic-tarot]

Intuitive Channeled Messages For You

1-2-3

4-5-6

(Disclaimer : This is a general reading please only take what resonated. For entertainment purposes only)

These are short messages I channeled without card, just intuitively. Please let me know what you think, I’d love to know!.

( Art designed on Canva )

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 1 🧸

"You begin to get what life is all about. Every incidents, now you realised, was not a coincidence.It was meticulously planned for you to get here. Where you are today. Every road lead you here where you can see it all from an objective point of view. And you get it, you finally got it. You would not be confused no more, you trust the universe unconditionally. You will go where they lead you. There are fears of course and doubts and hesitation, but they would never stop you from vibrating in a high frequency, a vibration of love and compassion.

You used to be scare, all the time. Scare of life, of people in it, of all your choices, was it the right choice?, did i made the wrong one?.Why is everyone against me, why is the world against me?. Now you realised, it was just all karmic, it was designed specifically for you. So you could learn your lesson and move up. Ascend and become who you are today. Wise, at peace and more trusting than ever. Trusting of life, situation and most importantly, yourself and your choices. What you went through got you here today and you will be forever grateful. To the Divine,to yourself and your soul, for leading you home finally.

Poem: Sorrow To Joy by @cant-find-my-name

This big transition came through

A revelation

Firstly, we changed our beliefs

Reevaluate our wants and our needs

What makes us happy?

Who values we are following

Who we are without the things we do

Strip away all the unnecessary

Let go of pointless worries

To truly turn joyful

First, we shifted our energy

In this new me, being joyful

Is very easy

Song : Coming Back For You by Fireboy DML

Well I pray that the universe Gives you way more than you deserve When the tears fall like shooting stars Remember who you are Just look up to the sky you'll see

Well I pray that the universe Gives you way more than you deserve When the tears fall like shooting stars Remember who you are Just look up to the sky you'll see I'm coming back for you

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 2🛍️

“I can still recall what happened vividly. The memories would never leave me. In a way, it shaped who I am. I identified with what I went through. All of it, the good and the not so good. I appreciates all the good times, all the good people. I wish them well and I know they would do the same for me. I am on a new journey. Honestly, I have no idea where I am going, where am I headed to?.It seem not that important to find out, I figure I'll just start step by step into the unknown. I’m willing to, in a way, I was waiting for this moment. Hoping for it in fact.

It seem I had shaded my old skin. Despited remembering everything that happened. I want to changed. I want to rebuild, I want to become something else. It not because I hated my old self or anything, in fact. It's the opposite. I love my old self very much, but I think it’s just time. Time for me to discover a new side of me that’s different. That the world have never seen before. I am excited, nervous but not scare at all. Which I'm thankful for, I want it to be a fun journey, learning about myself, who will I become. I love every versions of me, the old and I'm already sure that I will also love the new. I guess it's my new purpose in life, get to know thyself again and I'm looking forward to meet me.

Poem : Shooting Stars by @cant-find-my-name

My eyes Shined

They reflected the distance light

I’ve never pray so hard in my life

Wishing for a living dream

Wishing to know

What does all the pain mean?

Trying to find the reason

The universe put me here

And I can’t -

Find the reason

Even as stars shimmered

And shoot down

It is me that has been earth bound,

I can’t go back

I can’t go home

The limit is getting too loud

Going aimless

Wandering about

Maybe it is time for me to discover

Reach deep within me to know

How far did I come from?

And how far can I go?

Song: I'm Still Here by John Rzeznik (Treasure Planet)

I am a question to the world Not an answer to be heard Or a moment that's held in your arms And what do you think you'd ever say? I won't listen anyway, you don't know me And I'll never be what you want me to be

And what do you think you'd understand? I'm a boy, no, I'm a man You can't take me and throw me away And how can you learn what's never shown? Yeah, you stand here on your own They don't know me 'cause I'm not here

And I want a moment to be real Wanna touch things I don't feel Wanna hold on and feel I belong

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 3🍑

“It's the people that loved you for who you are that helped you made it. They were a voice telling you not to give up, even when you wanted to. Even when there was no more reasons to go on, you think of the people who loved you. And in a way, their love for you saved you, when your own love wasn’t enough.

But you are still not out of the wood yet, but you're not scare of it no more. You are not scare to be alone anymore. People are your strength and there's experiences of that, but they are also your weakness. The world is more complicated and more than one dimensional and frankly, it's giving you a headache. You just want to live a simple life, a minimalist, no complication, alone in a forest surrounded by nature. You want your wood to turn into a forest. And build a cozy cottage to refuge there when the real world is too much. But most of your life, it's a graveyard of regret and it's full of shadows that you rather ignore. However, no more of that you finally decided. You pray for life to get better, for yourself to get better and in a way, you did not see a way out of it alive.

But in those darkness, you saw light and that light has led you to where the sun shined through. You can see better days," the monsters turned out to be just tree". There are better days, healthier ways to live. And in a way, you want to find that out for yourself. There are alway balance in life, you must remember one thing. When there's darkness, there is also light. When you encounter one the other will also find you. When you experienced one side, don't be scare to face the other. That is how you learn, that you will alway be okay.

Poem: Invisible Force by @cant-find-my-name

Something is choking me

The invisible force

Stronger than what's real

Maybe the scariest thing

Are what we're all thinking

Not necessary the truth

Or what happened

But what could have been,

It's scary to see

What isn't there

The affect is real

But the enemy aren't here

Song: This is me trying by Taylor Swift

I've been having a hard time adjusting I had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting I didn't know if you'd care if I came back I have a lot of regrets about that Pulled the car off the road to the lookout Could've followed my fears all the way down And maybe I don't quite know what to say But I'm here in your doorway

I just wanted you to know That this is me trying I just wanted you to know That this is me trying

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 4🍇

"Peace will find you, no need to seek it. It's there for you to tap into it, anytime, anyplace. No need to acquired more to get it. The misconception that you need this or that in order to feel whole. It a misconception, you only need one thing child. And that is yourself. If you have yourself, all of you, the dark and light part of you, the side you loved and admired and the side that make you look away. All parts of you deserve recognition. They are you and yours alone, so we got to honour them. Every part of you love you and want your attention and want you to acknowledge them. Let us finally do that. Let us look into the mirror and see ourselves finally.

We are a pure soul, there is nothing wrong with us, no matter what people implied. We are not broken, we are whole. Your soul is intact, it is there for you to go back and connect to it. Your soul is waiting for you to answer its calling. You heard it but you ignore it because life get in the way, but, if you're trying to find that fulfilment. That feeling of, aww there it is the thing I'm look for?, as annoying as it is, it is that part of you that you wouldn't dare look at.

Poem: Surrendering by @cant-find-my-name

Surrendering my sorrows

Surrendering to my flaws

If there is no Perfection

I would be perfect

Nitpicking my visions

Aiming for the best

Left behind a broken body

And an anxiety ridden mind,

Right path don't do that

Peace is not a compromise

Tis a birth right

Just like how everyone will die,

Getting my soul back

Revived my forgotten joy

Everyday supposed to be precious

Not wishing for it to stop

Song : Back To Beautiful by Sofia Carson

They say You're not good enough, you're not brave enough You should cover up your body Tell me, watch my weight Gotta paint my face Or else no one's gonna want me

Why do we say this to ourselves? And even worse to each other? Why do we say this to ourselves? Ooh

We gotta, get back to beautiful Gotta, get back to beautiful All these words, starting wars Over who can hurt who more Gotta, get back to beautiful

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 5🍰

"Something is changing, you can feel it. More internally rather than externally. But it's changing all the same. But you're not scare or excited. You are just neutral about it. But there is that part of you that goes, Finally. Because lately, nothing evokes your interest.The desires you had once feel ill fitted. When you realised that nothing really matter, not in a depressing way, but more of a freeing way, You accepted that as truth. You are not satisfied in life, yes, but seeking more things will not do either. You don't want more per say, but there's something missing that you don't know how to put into words. The missing piece might not be tangible, might just be intangible things that you can't hold onto. Which way should you headed towards when your inner compass is kind of confused.

Forward is the way, you will never be lost, as long as you keep moving forwards and not stop. We will not rush either. When we are in a confusing state, we must take our time and experienced our moment fully so that there won't be a lapse in our memory. Memory is a tricky thing, if you think too far into the future or the past as you experiencing the present, then your present becomes filled with memories from the future or the past. So the present moment will never exist. Be careful of letting moments passed you by, it is alright to not know why you are feeling this way. It is alright to be confused or sad or even unsatisfied. It is alright to be in that state in your present because whatever you are feeling at the moment, the present will eventually become a past.”

Poem: Renewal by @cant-find-my-name

There is hope in this world

In words that you said,

Even though it's a lie

You tell yourself it'll be okay

Maybe not now

Definitely not right now

But hopefully someday

You begin to notice the yellow

In dandelions,

How it shine like gold

In certain light.

Now you finally see

The colourful sky

How many shades of it

Changed with time.

How every poem you write

Begins to rhyme

And you know there's a reason for all this

Every little bit of it

So whatever happened

Do not resist

For you shall learn to embrace it

Song : Take A Chance by Flume

So you feel all your powers unfold

Stretching our big wings while the white is turning gold So tell your story baby, don't give up, just let it all go out You're quiet wishing for something now

Will you be the one to take a chance? Have demands, spill your heart Will you be the one to take a stand Make the girls dance Spill your thoughts Will you be the one to take a chance? Have demands, spill your heart Will you be the one to take a stand Make the girls dance Spill your thoughts, will you?

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

Pile 6🌙

"The unlimited possibility you seek is there for you to tapped into. Your believed is everything, so be careful what or who you believe in. Miracles exist, just look into a mirror and witness one. Look into your own eyes and wondered who that soul is. For it is you, but there so much you don't know about yourself, yet. Instead of feeling bad about that, we should feel excited. For it is a privilege to know thyself. Know your limit and your unlimited possibilities. How many grains of sand on the beach, that is how much your potentials lies. What you can achieved in life is up to how much you are opened to recieved.

My dear, you are magnificent, I wish you can see yourself through my eyes. How you hold on to life, wise beyond your years. Give it everything you got, no matter what that is, is such a human trait even gods envied. Every difficulties you go through know that those got nothing on your willpower to get through them. You are a strong little human, whose hope is bigger then the universe.You believe in the better, better days, better life, better energy for this earth. And your hope/light is what is keeping this planet alive. Keep believing in your power, because you are powerful. And loved by many.

Poem: Home Coming by @cant-find-my-name

My Divine Mother gentle touch

She taught me so much

By being nurtured we grow

By being loved we thrive

By being connected

We become part of the Divine

I know you look at yourself

And see a scare child

Darling, that's quite alright

Cause you are protected, alway

All the flaws should be

Embraced

There's no need for harsh judgment

Gentleness to ourselves is what

We should aim for

Realise what's important

Now look at yourself one more time

And see the true core

Song: Hummingbird by Metro Boomin & James Blake 

Hummingbird, summer sun, has it brought my life back? Hangin' in the balance, have you brought the light back? And how long's the night shift? She's sure I get away with Realizin' she might be all I need in this life

When I saw a cold snap, I wasn't with the season Attack was on the airport and outside there was a season In here paper walls are pushing back on you like Eventually you push through, the moment that you realize

And hummingbird, I know that's our time (That's our time) But stay on, stay on, stay on with me And hummingbird, I can never unsee What you've shown me, stay on, stay on with me

🍰 🌸 🍬 💫 🍉 You Are Loved 🍉 💫 🍬 🌸 🍰

🍑Thank you for reading! I would love to know what you think. See you soon!!!🧿

🍏Check out more of my Original Poetry at @cant-find-my-name or my IG Poemnic

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#pick a card #tarot messages #tarot reading #messages #poetry #writing #channeled reading #channelled message

[doog20]

Waymond

So i have been rewatching Everything Everywhere All at Once, on repeat since i watched when it released, its become a sort of comfort movie. i can recite the lines from this movie 1:1 if that gives you an indecation of how much i have seen this. anyways thats besides the point, i wanted to chat about comic releaf and how this movie does it perfectly with Waymond.

by the way, pls bear with me, my writing style is more narrative based than anything else. think of this as a trip into my brain lol <3

life is hard, we all deal with it in different ways. some people deal with it dead on, and try to analyse it all, and decided things based on facts. but some, some very interesting souls, wholeheartedly reject this and seek wholeness in the fact that they dont need to see it all to understand it all. i myself probably fit somewhere in the middle, i feel very happy when i understand things and try my hardest to understand alot of things. but i find alot of safety in the idea that there are just some things that need to be joked about and not analysed at all.

When we meet Waymond he is in a bad place, his marriage is falling apart, his daughter and wife are feuding and to put a cherry on the top of this cake he is ablivious to this all, instead living life as if it was fine, its not, but he is still dancing and making costumers laugh.

Waymond fits into group 2, the people that dont need to know everything, everywhere all at once (see what i did there). BUT this must NOT be taken as these people not understanding the world or being somehow stupider bc they pick a different path. rather it should be taken as just another way to exist.

many comic releaf characters are only that, no 3 dymentionality, just there to cut the tension. this used to work well when movies were shorter and not as in demand. as we start to see things over and over they get boring, we all know this. the thing is though, we need comic releaf in every movie somewhere.

okay lets do an exercise, think of your favourite movie, now think of any scene in that movie serious or otherwise, i can take a shot in the dark and say that if you told a friend about this scene alone they wouldnt think much of it, bc they dont have context, they dont have a build up to any of this. now take a scene that has a moment of comic releaf, and tell this to your metaphorical friend about this scene, i can say with 90% confidence that they will for sure understand that scene better. what i am trying to say is that comic releaf makes things more palettable.

Waymond for almost the whole movie is kind of a joke... he isnt very serious and when he is its out of character for him, but come the 3rd act and its revealed that Waymond is doing all of this by choice, as the world just needs googly eyes every now and then.

this reveal hits so well on 3 levels. level 1 it informs the viewers more on Waymond and forces a reevaluation of him, level 2 it changes how Michelle Yeoh's character, Evelyn looks at he current situation and level 3 makes the comic releaf 3D!!! not only is he doing this to make it easier on himself but also on everyone else. this builds his character of just being a father and caring person, even with his costumers, he is just doing this to make them happier.

when i look at this movie a few things come to mind, 2 scenes the intro to the rocks where its just silence and text to read, the whole saga with the sausage fingers and Waymond as a character.

in closing, im very happy that The Daniels made this. this movie that was really funny, really insightful and really did give me my favourite character in movie history. I wish the them all the best and hope they keep knocking out BANGERS like this one

anyways thanks for reading, hope you have a good day :3

okay so that was really nice to write out, i havent been able to flex my writing muscles for a while, i am dyslexic and its just very energy consuming but very very fun to do when it comes together. its been real, doog signing off

[mtnkat3]

Don't be long winded!

Well... didn't work that way!

Wrote in diary because. Well.

M.11.14.2022 3.06pm.

Ok.

Today's counseling was ... me & this place. How I interact with others.

And how to fix me.

Boundaries. Self respect. Value. Worthiness.

I am Valuable.

I am worthy of life, & of love.

I am deserving of life, & of love.

Teaching me that I need to reset my own personal boundaries. But also my boundaries for others & how I wish to be treated. What's been taught & learned needs to be reevaluated.

Does God want me to be constantly hurt because I let others devalue me? No.

And I also must learn to remember this for myself.

"Do unto others as you would have others do to you."

I don't want to be mean nor unkind to other people. To hurt them, their souls. The very thought is abhorrent to me!

And don't get me started on my thoughts about people who hurt babies, children, & God help me.. the kinds that kidnap & do horrible things like rape & human trafficking.

IT IS APPALLING!

For me, those people... eye for an eye.

The warrior queen in me just.. gets a strong urge to ...cleanse.

[I am a rape survivor. ~I~ had to think about that choice. And thank You Jesus, I did not have a child. And that He cleared my health too! You answered my prayers! But nor do I agree with abortion. That's God's domain, not mine. Certainly not the government.]

So treat them the way I want to be treated!

And reestablishing my boundaries in kind.

I am a good woman, but I am working to be better. And to keep doing my best! Strive every day!

I have done things wrong here. I admit that.

And that I am here like I strive for real life. Kind & value other people. Their time, & souls. But I will say that I am honest & deplore false behavior. I want the truth. Period.

I know a lot, if not most, people that use social media do so for a variety of reasons. But a lot of Tumblr & how it was started, as well as such other sites do so for escapism, & sadly wrong doing.

I don't agree with that.

Therefore I do not condone it.

My wee lil corner isn't about "sex, boobs, butts & hookups."

Those who want that need to go elsewhere.

And most have! I still get some of the bots.. following, I've had 2 or 3 in asks. I've been propositioned by supposed women. Ain't goin there. The only things I block are those. And the few actual real ones that I have blocked, had derogatory views that I want no part of.

I am here to heal.

I actually had a lightbulb moment💡 on that recently. I didn't just come to Tumblr to heal, like I thought. But God opened my eyes that I have been looking for the one I fell for years ago in this place.

I no longer know who that is.

That is where I messed up & made a fool of myself. But I can't do that anymore.

I feel in my soul he is here but I don't know who nor where. So I've given it to God. Because I hurt myself. And I feel I have hurt him too. Heck, maybe why I don't know!

I only hope thet those I have hurt, & maybe my soul's mate is among them, that someday I am forgiven.

Not that I expect anything to happen.

Expectations. No.

I just want the one I love.. to be happy & feel loved.

With. Or without. Me.

Because we humans scar each other with expectations. With the things we fantasize about, hope for & dream about.

For me, I expect nothing.

I thank God for every breath I breathe. That I wake up & make it thru another day.

I don't expect to be forgiven for me.

I pray the souls I unintentionally hurt can forgive because God heals the souls within. And then can be happy.

The only expectations I'll allow myself are to do better of myself.

Treat people better.

Give them the boundaries on how to treat me right.

And if that means they walk away from me then...

Let Them.

That post is very much on my mind.

[It & several others are in my note app & pinned to my status bar. That's how much I agree with... "Let them."]

And when I begin the work on my massive tattoo design... it will be a part of it. [I've been researching uv & 3d for.. ~10 years. My design is very personal.]

Heck, I think it's time to revisit my note pad & vacation plans!

Looking at all the towns along the coast I grew up with & wanna visit & reflect. And see how humanity has swarmed. Grimace. Think that's what stops me. Ruining my childhood memories. From NC to FL. From DC to the space coast. To across.. I so wanna go back to Busch Gardens! But I think the Florida is different than Williamsburg one. I loved the international aspects & learning new things. Loved the German stuff! So neat!

I need a flippin break! Huh. Maybe I should just find an island spa retreat somewhere & escape humanity for a month & hold off on my reminiscing tour again.

I'm just.. worn.

My tree is so bending in the middle that it's splintering. I don't like that. It's time to work on my healing.

My assigned tasks this week are read both of my books. Not to take notes. But read & absorb. Then go back later & do the note taking.

I do hope, & pray, that my soul's mate, my Bears ..Angels.. do in fact read my raw feelings here. And someday can forgive me. And if I am to be Blessed.. want.. me. For me.

For me, that's not something I am willing to give up hope on. Ever.

That's not what God instructs me to do. Not what He is wanting me to learn. He wants me to come to Him. First. And be Blessed with my soul's mates love. Because that is a precious & priceless Gift.

Not something I'd ever take for granted.

So... whomever.. wherever.. you .. are... please... hear my soul.. I am sorry. For all I have done wrong. My God heal that soul. And may He have Mercy & Grace upon mine.

As He Teaches, Guides, Molds, Loves, Protects, shows me His Wisdom, Guidance, Strength & Perseverance to get my life back on its proper track.

I love.

I believe.

I will endure, work & await. On my cliffside. ~True love never dies & true love always waits.~

So Thy Will Be Lord.

Your humbled bowed hurting confused listening closely quietly & carefully

Your complex quirky warrior queen daughter.

~Tijgeress kat Phoenix. 🌺🐾🐯✝️

🙊🙈🙉😖😟😥☔🌀🌬🌫🤓👩⚓🙏🙇‍♀️🌂🔗 ⛓🧰🏋️‍♀️🧘‍♀️📋📆📝💸⚙🏗🧱⚒🛠⚔⚖🔐🗽🦅🕊🥧🍁🧣🥾🍋🥤🥨🍯🍼☕🍫🍎🍑🍒 🐯🐾🐐🦉🐢🐛🦋🌱🌺🌹🌻🌷🌳🧶🧵 ⌚💡⚡🌠🗝🚀🔱⚜💝🐻🦌🧩♠️🎯♾🕯🧭🎶

M.11.14.2022 4.33pm. Corrections. 4.52pm.

[invinciblerodent]

I've been kinda thinking about character motivations, and reasons for decisions made in each playthrough all day, and I think the core of Iona's personal narrative is finally starting to expose itself to me, which is neat.

Like... while Arvid's arc is overall about him balancing the divine with the mundane, and learning to make decisions with his own needs in mind occasionally, Iona's is shaping up to be one of... the continual challenging of long-held beliefs, and picking through her own survival tactics like she's unpicking a big, painful knot in one's hair that's tugging at the skin. Her story is kind of looking like it's about finding the line between what's true, and what was merely said enough times to start sounding like the truth- about what even the liar was lied to, basically.

From the beginning, when she's outed as specifically not a by-choice magic user, but a magical being, one with living sorcery in her veins, to her vehemently anti-magic community their warmth turns instantly to cold steel (even running to her husband for help and comfort only to meet scorn, rejection, and pain), she has had to constantly challenge herself, and try to find just how much of her view of the world was grounded in common sense, and how much of it is just... common nonsense.

It kind of works out beautifully that the first people she breaks bread with in the game are a guarded and jumpy young woman who is 100% lying to her (yeah, turns out she's an ardent worshipper of a dark, forbidden goddess), and a handsome, if foppish, city-type fellow, who only suspends his bristling about roughing it long enough to lay on the charm extra thick and obvious (whoops, a vampire- someone she would have ordinarily believed to be a mindless monster at that point).

Over and over in the story, Iona seems to have to completely reevaluate all the things she thinks she knows. Everything, from her idea of what a monster is, to where the line between morality, justice, and ruthless self-interest lies, to what love is and looks like (is it a contract? a mutually beneficial transaction? something different and delicate and precious and entirely new?), is constantly being challenged, and since the factors doing the challenging seem immutable, it has to be her who does the changing.

In the beginning portions of act 2, she was a little... noncommittal, about the whole ascension thing. Sure, in act 1 she was fully in favor of upending Cazador's whole schtick (in a "cool plan my guy, godspeed, have fun with that, glad that's not my mess to clean up" kind of way), and this thing, while literally diabolical, it was easy enough to see that it'd at least get results. Like, maybe the ends really would justify the means like they so often have so far, and the "number of souls" sacrificed were no more than an abstract that he at least seemed excited about. But meeting Dalyria and Petras (and experiencing that spark of genuine fear of Astarion then), talking to the attacking spawn, that (on top of everything else learned, including the sentience and potential benevolence in mind flayers and all that) is yet another very sharp pivot in her mind that exposes the whole thing for the nakedly amoral action it would really be.

Between that night in the Elfsong, and when we'll finally go to Cazador, she'll be slowly piecing together her thoughts on how much power is it really okay for just one person to take, how much revenge is justified, and at what point does it turn to harmful excess, to evil for its own sake, and there is something... that's imo kind of beautiful about how "not my circus, not my kobolds" turns into "I want you to live a life you can be proud of".

(In my headcanon, after the "the world can be a wonderful, kind place, Astarion, if you find your place in it" line she says in that post-attack callout, there is just a tiny bit of an insert of an expansion: it's just him asking, with an exhale that could pass for amused were it not for the somber look in his eyes, "you really believe that, don't you?" and her responding, with just a hint of a desperate edge, as if uncertain herself, "I have to. Otherwise, what's the point? To all this?")

#if she had a personal quest it'd have to be one that can be completed at any point in the game #but depending on how long one lets her grow and change; the outcomes would be radically different #like if you go to the cult with her in act 1 it ends in a horrible; game-endingly difficult massacre of a village #the game clearly intends you to fail then and it's doable only technically; if you really WANT the bad ending #so you need to level and grind and come back much later #but by the time you're in act 3 and would decimate everything she has grown enough that there... need not even be any killing #is this anything #the exact same outcome -slaughtering all- could either gain her unshakable loyalty but cement her in a cold spiteful state #that may or may not bite the player in the ass later #or cause her to become hostile and/or permanently leave the party #that sounds like it'd be a pretty cool thing for a game like this to do #squirrel plays bg3 #oc: iona raedir #i am. in so much pain today #need sleepies bye bye honk-shoooooo #i've been poking this wall of text for like an hour now i'm so foggy

[sheviolentlyher]

A women’s heart can withstand a blast like that. It is heavily armored and looks very much like Joan of Arch.

I think I understand now. I was too much of a girl. Yes, I can say that I was needy, only because he presented that opportunity. Enough excuses. My inexperience with intimacy and romance had me at a disadvantage. I took it all to heart like I’m built too.

Seeing as we don’t really need each other, but we did, and we do. Because life is completely driven by mentality. It is not how beautiful, rich, or privileged you are. It is what lies inside that fucking skull of yours. People need community, so that means people need people.

If you can just have the one fucking person accept you for your entirety, then what else do you ever really need? NOTHING.

Maybe I am stretching my thinking a bit too far here, but I quickly decide that I am not. Men are the ying, and women are the yang. We walk around this earth as a half circle, trying to find our perfect match, anyone will admit this, and if they say they don’t need anyone? Then they are lying to your face and you should deeply consider reevaluating your approach. It is my personal opinion that those people are extremely hurt and heavily guarded.

Life can seem absolutely impossible, and this is the true meaning of feeling “alone” even when you already thought you felt circular at one point in your current relationship. So, do you adjust and settle? Or do you continue the searching to be whole, to feel complete, to actually feel change in your mentality? Yeah, it’s a hard fucking choice isn’t it?

Is there where “love” and “in love” come into play?

Think about it. If you settle, you do love that person and fully commit to the journey ahead. If you feel that you truly need to continue the search it can be absolutely devastating to the relationship. What is it that you want so badly that you cannot already give yourself? See, that is a hard question to answer because what you want you cannot mentally, physically give yourself because you are already giving it to yourself on a constant basis. Are you with me?

This brings me to an old myth about god punishing humans by ripping them from their soul mates and throwing them down to earth with no way of finding each other. Left with only guesses we vow to someone in the name of god that we will basically play the role of “soul mate” when there is a pretty good chance they know in their hearts that it’s not them. Some people are able to find this in life, I don’t want to call them lucky because half of the fun is feeling the mundane feeling of being alone with oneself, but that’s just me. Ha. I love romanticizing life in a dark way because everyone else likes to use fairies and princesses. Which are nice every once and awhile, not gonna lie. Togetherness is so odd sometimes.

It is why I curse the mundane vows of marriage. It seems so cult like and routine. Did someone know that we were made like this? Feeling incomplete? but what if we followed the vows of marriage, then we should definitely feel complete?

I went way off track there and I laugh at myself. Pacing back and forth in a mind suffocated by dull stranger chatter. I appreciate my mind significantly. It is my most prized possession. It makes me feel so confident that I am no longer mentally worried about the image other people’s minds make of me. It’s sorta like this egotistical “it’s your loss” kind of mindset. I used to be worried about my physical appearance constantly. It was eating me like the rocky horror picture show eats at the gay community 😆— anyways ever since I have intentionally invested time and energy into making my mindset as become more and more circular, I have felt like the most beautiful being on earth. I need nothing to make me glow because I am constantly glowing. My aura hugs you from ten feet away. Okay, now I may be boasting, but I only speak what I am observing.

Human behavior intrigues me deeply. The mind being so fertile yet fragile excites me. I can tell you about you more than you can tell yourself about you. I make you think for days and days and it drives you mad, but you want more!!! I love studying humans like I am the smartest being on the planet. It is what makes me feel more like a creature than human, and I love that feeling. Humans are the most easy and complex thing there ever is to observe. I enjoy most of the experiences I have with human beings. They are generally always bottled up with words and I compliment them wonderfully with conversation starters. I love getting lost in the moment with them. Every encounter seems personal and real. They love compliments in any form, and I take much pleasure giving them out freely, everyone underestimates the infinite power of a compliment.

There are days where it is hard to not also stay attentive to the impulsive animal nature of the human. Everyone likes to call these “horrors,” and I would agree. I tried to think of another to associate my thoughts to the word horror. What is really scary to me? What do I find horrifying? Horrors differ from each mind but you can most certainly find the most common ground when talking about said horrors all the fucking time. I think early human beings were always naturally optimistic, but these horrors have turned the entire race into pessimists.

Again, proving that mentality dictates life. But how do we get there in an optimistic way in a country with oppressed human beings? I’m not saying physically oppressed, materialistically oppressed, I’m talking mentally oppressed. And it is done way more often that you think. Certain words being used by our government that our mentality oppressed minds have the time to even compute fast enough to keep up and really define what they are saying. They know this about us and I want to also know this about us.

Seems I have jumped down a rabbit hole again, but I love butchering the mind like this. It is what freedom really is.

How the fuck did we get here? 😂 this was fun my love. You know how much I appreciate you sitting here eagerly letting me speak freely. What a privilege and pleasure this always is. Deep diving into the infinite life inside of your many burning stars, keeping the way lit the entire time. Thank you for allowing me to speak my works of art and hang them here on your wall of nothingness. I live and speak life very poetically, figuratively, and cosmically. I take pride of feeling like I’m just a girl going insane in a woman’s body. Not knowing how to manage, maintain or acknowledge this growth inside and outside of me. A little girl who knows nothing but always is eager to know everything. I fucking love this place we call earth and I am having a great fucking time.

I love you my void, be good. 💋

P.S - - god, I feel beautiful.

-x

#tuesday #human behaviour #human nature #humanity #human #diary #tumblr diary #diaryposting #personal diary #poetic #writeblr #writing #writers and poets #poetry blog #poetry #spilled writing #deep writing #free writing #free write #writblr #writers on tumblr #writerscommunity #girl interrupted #divine woman #womanhood #high value woman #raw thoughts #raw #deep truth #deep post

[theway-itwas]

20230906

to you:

i've been doing a lot of reflecting.

i've been in this state of hindsight for a couple days now. all i can seem to do is think. i think about everything that was, that could've been, and that i wish had never been. it's the most excruciating process, and yet, i continue to come out of it stronger and wiser than before.

somehow, though, it always circles back around to you.

i've been hurt many times, but nothing has ever cut me quite as deep as you. the heartbreak and rejection could never compare, because you? you killed me.

because of you, i had to reevaluate everything. i had to rebuild my entire life--to pick up the pieces and reinvent everything i've ever known. my perception of everything changed because of you. the way i view relationships, people, and myself were shattered because of you. the venom that dripped from your lips still courses through my veins.

the fact that, even now, hearing your name stings, says everything i can't put into words. every misstep and mistake i have ever made in my relationships can be traced back to you. you destroyed me.

i was just a kid, you know. that innocent 15 year old girl that you crushed in the palm of your hand just wanted to be seen. she just wanted to be desired and needed. she wanted so desperately to have something to cherish, and she never deserved what you did to her. being the age i am now, just a little bit older than you were at the time, makes it all the worse. how did you do it? why did you even consider taking advantage of a naive child who didn't know any better? and why did it have to be me?

i don't remember the specifics anymore. not a single day nor a conversation sticks in my head, and perhaps that's for the best. but what i do remember all too well is the feeling. the feeling of blind euphoria, being noticed by someone, and through a smokescreen, being treated like the most precious thing on earth. i also remember the feeling of confusion, wondering why you suddenly stopped calling. and the feeling of my innocence being ripped out of my very soul. the worthlessness that came after you threw me away. i was a child. i didn't know any better than you.

the worst part is, for years i defended you. my brain still foolishly finds ways to defend you; to my friends, to you, to myself. i tried to justify what you did to me because i was "in love" with you. i tried to comb through every small and minute detail to find the silver lining in just one thing--to look for anything less than horrific. and yet, i still look back on those days with sheer terror in my eyes.

you were an adult. you knew better. you chose to pursue a 15 year old, a child who would tell you about high school drama, while you pleaded and begged for things a child should never have to give an adult. you broke me into submission, and all i knew at the time was that i wanted and needed to please you. we were intimate, i sent you pictures that i shouldn't have even thought about taking, and you enjoyed it. it was vile, the ways you crafted your perfect fantasy out of an incomplete mold. you manipulated and coerced me into being obsessed with you. i was a lost puppy, desperate for you, and you were a fiend hungry for power. you used me until you didn't need to anymore, and left the shards of an innocent little girl who couldn't for the life of her figure out what exactly she did wrong.

i struggled, and still do, with loving because of you. loving myself, loving others, trusting anyone. at 15 years old i had to cry on the bathroom floor, utterly destroyed, wondering why i wasn't good enough. i turned to substance abuse and developed an addiction that could've easily gotten me killed. i had to sit and watch while you berated me and made fun of me with your friends--a group of adults bickering with a child. i didn't know then that it wasn't my fault. i didn't know then that i never had a choice, and that i didn't do anything wrong.

i hope being your forever kept secret haunts you. i wish i could sit here and say i forgive you, and i understand why you did what you did to me. but i hate lying, primarily because of you. i refuse to lie to myself any longer.

i hope the thought of me keeps you up at night. i hope you live in constant fear that i could jeopardize your career, your friends, and every relationship you will ever have. i hope you lay on your bedroom floor and hysterically sob at the thought of every single atrocity you committed to an innocent child. i hope dread washes over you every time you conveniently skip over the time you spent stringing me along when you talk about your exes with anyone who asks.

i know you don't, and you never will, but i hope someday you realize the value of the life you nearly ended.

i have never once gotten an apology, or even an acknowledgement from you. i deserved it then and i deserve it now, but it will never come. so many of my faults are deeply rooted in my time that was shackled by you. i just hope one day i can break free of the chains you still have me locked in.

with any luck, this will be the last time i ever have to utter your name.

you destroyed me, sydney. and in a desperate attempt to reclaim everything you stole from me, i wrote you this. though you will never read it, i will know that everything i have ever wanted to say to you is here.

[xmystophalesx]

Best New Heavy Metal Releases Week of November 18th, 2022

The Heavy Metal train just keeps rolling and week after week with more and more great releases. I started doing this because I was so insanely annoyed with people that were absolutely insistent that nothing good had come out since 1992. I would contend that more of the albums being released now are hands down better than the “Glory Days”. What is being done today on a shoestring budget is simply stunning. So let’s look at a few of these stunning albums. Man, perfect segue…:)

Hellfuck-Diabolical Slaughter (Thrash/Speed)**{sept 9th}

I just came across this and although it was released on September 9th, I just had to put it on this list. If I would have heard this during the week of release, it would have made a serious push for the album of the week. If you even slightly like aggressive Thrash Metal this will put a huge smile on your face. DO NOT MISS THIS ONE!

Candlemass-Sweet Evil Sun (Epic Doom)**

Does anyone today create Doom Metal as good as Candlemass can? I seriously doubt it. This is yet another gem from the Doom Metal masters.

Metalian-Beyond the Wall (Heavy/Speed)**

I have been a fan of this band for quite some time and I swear they just seem to get better and better with each release. This band would be an absolutely perfect addition to the Hell’s Heroes lineup in Houston. Just listen to track 2 “Motorhorse” and if it doesn’t just make you instantly crack a smile and start making you bang your head, you may not actually like Heavy Metal and you may need to reevaluate your life choices.

Istarn-Eschatology (Melodic Black)**

Came across this one late on in the weekend and worried that I wouldn’t find a highlight Black Metal album. It was down to the wire but Istarn showed up to continue the streak of yet another excellent Black Metal album. This genre has been absolutely fantastic over the last couple of years. If you haven’t given this genre a chance in a while, look into it. You may be surprised.

Rising Steel-Beyond the Gates of Hell (Heavy)**

A slab of good old-fashioned Heavy Metal but with a slightly more aggressive slant. If you know the American Power Metal band Cage, this band feels like a more aggressive version of them. Great riffs all over this album that will get that head banging.

That will do it for another week. Can’t believe we are almost at the end of the year. Now starts the anxiety of trying to set my top 30 albums of the year. Ahhhh first world problems. Always remember that music is the passion of the soul. Until next week, and as always,

BANG THY HEAD!!!

All worthy of a listen if you like the genre

*= standout in that genre

**=best of the week regardless of genre

Best of the Week

Candlemass-Sweet Evil Sun (Epic Doom)**

Aggression-From Hell with Hate (Thrash)**

Hellfuck-Diabolical Slaughter (Thrash/Speed)**{sept 9th}

Metalian-Beyond the Wall (Heavy/Speed)**

Rising Steel-Beyond the Gates of Hell (Heavy)**

Istarn-Eschatology (Melodic Black)**

Fatal Punishment-Age of Madness (Thrash)**

Unhallowed Creation-Edge of Existence (Melodic Death)**

Standout in their Genre

Wizards-Seven (Heavy)*

Disinter-Breaker of Bones (Death)*

Freternia-The Final Stand (Power)*

Virtual Symmetry-Virtual Symmetry (Progressive)*

Desert Dragon-This Side of Heaven (Hard Rock)*

Titan’s Rage-Never Surrender (Heavy/Traditional)*

Threshold-Dividing Lines (Progressive)*

17 Crash-Stamina (hard Rock)*

Blood of the Wolf-IV:The Declaration of War Eternal (Death/Black)*

Grimner-Urfader (Folk/Viking)

Rise to the Sky-Stay With Me When You’re Gone (Death/Doom)*

Terrible Sickness-Flesh for the Insatiable (Death)*

Witchunter-Metal Dream (Heavy)*

Well Seasoned Christ-Sanguine (Thrash)*

Airstrike-Power In Your Hand (Heavy/Thrash)*

Enemy Eyes-History’s Hand (Heavy)*

Guapa-Myriad (Psychadelic)*

Worth a listen if you enjoy the genre

Robot God-Worlds Collide (Stoner/Psychadelic)

Ueldes-Foreverer (Atmospheric Black)

Encyrcle-Deeper (Heavy/Speed)

Crypt Rot-An Ancient Summoning (Brutal Death)

Raskasta Joulua-Viides Adventti (Heavy/Hard Rock)

Allagash-Dark Future (Heavy/Thrash)

Medusa Touch-Insaniteyes (Heavy)

Dead Earth-Et Disperdam Illud (Melodic Black)

Rat Rod-Four on the Floor (Hard Rock)

Kamra-Cerebral Alchemy (Atmospheric Black)

IBUKI-My Life (Power)

Rebel Souls-Dawn of Depravity (Death)

Risingfall-Rise or Fall (Heavy)

Scars of the Flesh-In Darkness Alone (Death/Progressive)

Visceral-The Tree of Venomous Fruit (Death)

Cortege-Vandari (Death)

Leatherwolf-Kill the Hunted (Heavy)

With an impressive 5 winter fucking sucks out of a possible 5, Metalian takes pick of the week with yet another outstanding release!

#black metal #metal #music #classic rock #folk #hard rock #hardcore music #rock #death metal #punk #melodic death metal #heavy metal #heavymusic #heavyrock #traditional metal #melodic black metal #youtube #extreme metal #melodic death #melodic metal

[logicalsnake]

The Simplicity of Dreams

+++++

Humans are fickle things, unable to fly or shapeshift. They can’t even communicate telepathically. But then how did they create a weapon so powerful that they can control human minds? It’s impossible, yet these weak, brittle mortals have accomplished just that.

Yes, Leonardo da Vinci did escape from Elysium and reveal a few secrets, and yes, Albert Einstein did crack into the control department of an existential being, but those are small accomplishments, barely overcoming the hurdle that is evolution.

But until Walt Disney came along… everything was fine.

The gods had guarded their secrets, only letting children believe that the red man at the poles, Santa Klaus, was real, only letting slip a few hints about the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, Krampas and Jack Frost, until Walt Disney, that accursed man, dreamed.

He dreamed of a land where anything is possible, where mice talk and women have ice powers, where snakes hypnotise and elephants fly, where humans of all ages could be happy, without a care in the world.

This man is powerful, the gods thought. He must be stopped.

So they sent a disease. But the man shook it off and kept dreaming.

So they sent grief. But the man, curse him, shrugged it off and kept dreaming of joy, and peace, and laughter.

And people listened.

They listened, and laughed at the mouse with a steamboat.

They listened, and cried when the young girl fell into endless sleep.

They listened, and dreamed about their Prince Charming.

The gods were in more disorder than they had been since the Black Plague.

This was an infraction.

They had to stop this.

So they killed Walt Disney, knowing that the happiness would stop.

But it didn't. It only rose.

It rose with a beauty and a beast, and it rose with an Afghan love story.

It rose with lions and hyenas, and it rose with a little blue alien and a Hawaiian girl.

It kept rising, and it didn't stop. The gods were in disorder. So they called a vote. They would send a deity to earth to stop this hate. So they chose a horror goblin, one of the creatures of hell.

The goblin went to earth and conjured up images of a man and a tiger.

But the mortals took that idea and created a story about a boy and a bear, and a snake. And their plans were foiled as the sadness of the real world fell away and shattered, making way for stories that would change the universe.

Stories of an ice queen and a sister.

Stories of a skeleton and a rag doll falling in love.

Stories of ohana, stories of love.

Stories that began with a man and a mouse, but grew into so much more.

Stories that changed our lives, first with a young woman with singing mice, then with faith and trust and pixie dust, then with a sleeping maiden, and then with a story of two brothers who love their father, and finally with a man finding his way back to life.

Stories that are who we are.

Stories that create us.

Stories that defied the gods and spread warmth and happiness to the darkest and saddest of places.

Stories that rise higher than the second star on the left, and ring louder than the bells of Notre Dame.

Stories that warm a frozen heart, and remind us of the place where lost things go.

Stories about a cat and a dog in New York, about a pirate and a special compass.

Stories that began with a man

and a mouse.

#disney #soul made me reevaluate my life choices #walt disney #the jungle movie #mickey mouse #oliver and company #the hunchback of notre dame #frozen #peter pan #onward #pirates of the caribbean #the nightmare before xmas #lilo and stitch #the lion king #snow white #sleeping beauty #dumbo #steamboat willie #cinderella #soul

[the-insomniac-emporium]

Slumbering Hearts (Alcina Dimitrescu/Reader, Soulmate AU) Pt. 2

Fandom: Resident Evil: Village Rating: T for language Warnings: None Summary: In a wicked twist of fate, you find out your soulmate is none other than your employer, Lady Dimitrescu. To your misery, she (at first) seems equally displeased, her heart already belonging to another. But in time, the two of you find yourselves wondering… could the universe be right, after all? Soulmate AU in which every person has a unique “soul mark”, which they share with their soulmate. Notes: Reader gets a bit of a backstory here, with just enough concrete details to serve the plot in future chapters. Hopefully enough is kept vague for people to enjoy it. Now... Time to meet your new kids-in-law/the gremlins :) Previous Chapters: 1: In The Shadow Of Giants

2: Uncertain Destinations

“You already know my name, as well as my fate, and I have neither threats nor demands to make of you. I am at your mercy, regrettably, with nothing more to say. Shall we consider ourselves ‘introduced’? Or is there more you wish to ask of me?” You wonder, eying ‘Alcina’ with a bored expression. It felt odd to refer to her that way, even within the confines of your mind. She had been ‘Lady Dimitrescu’ for as long as you could remember; starting with your years in the village, and continuing through your months here at the castle. One day, perhaps, you would grow used to calling her by her first name. For now, you simply hoped to focus on other matters.

“Tell me of yourself, your past. Who were you before you came here?” Alcina asks, surprising you. What did it matter, now that you were stuck here? At first you shrug, avoiding eye contact, not wanting to open yourself up to her. But before long she’s placed a hand on your shoulder, applying just enough pressure to encourage you to speak. You win this round, you think.

“Somehow I doubt you’ll find it terribly interesting. I was born in the outskirts of the village, on a small farm, just like any other. I had a pet dog, went to ‘school’ with my neighbors, and spent my weekends volunteering with the church. The only thing you might not expect is that I lived outside the village for about a decade. Traveled for a while, never really staying anywhere for terribly long. Eventually, I got tired, and so I came back to help my parents with what little property they had left,” you explain, quietly. Being vague had been intentional, considering the nature of a few details. Did she need to know why you had left? Or that you had once revered Mother Miranda?... No, because if she learned that, it would not be long before she learned that you had changed your mind years ago. Something told you that she wouldn’t appreciate your lack of faith in her mistress. “That was six months ago, roughly. Barely got to spend time with my parents before I was ‘donated’ to the staff here.”

“Not many ever leave the village. Those that do rarely, if ever, return. How particular,” Alcina replies, giving a soft hum. There’s something in her expression that tells you she’ll eventually ask you to elaborate. For now, however, she seems content to move on. Internally you sigh in relief. “I suppose this is sufficient to sate my curiosity, for the time being. Now come with me, I’d like to introduce you to my daughters, to ensure that they understand you are… off limits.” With that said she stands, once more reminding you just how small and fragile you are in comparison, before heading towards the exit. You’re nearly forced to jog in order to keep up with her long strides. As she leads you through hallways, down a flight of stairs, and past several nervous looking maidens, she slows down the slightest bit, having eventually noticed your struggle. Admittedly, that’s more kindness than you would have anticipated. Perhaps she was used to adjusting her pace for her daughters?

Whatever the reason, you do appreciate it. Still, by the time you arrive at your destination, the castle’s library, your legs are feeling the smallest bit sore. Brushing off the ache, you follow Alcina inside. Then you’re taking in the sights, having not been here before, admiring the impressive collection. Glad I’m not responsible for cleaning this place, you think as you pass by dozens of filled shelves. Before long you encounter the three daughters. They’re sitting in a semi-circle, each with their own book, though they’re quick to sit up once they spy their mother. One by one they’re smiling up at her, not even sparing you a moment’s glance. Admittedly you’re glad for that. What good could come from their attention, especially when they don’t yet know who you ‘truly’ are?

“I’m glad to see you’re all in one place, my darlings. There has been a… development, of sorts,” Alcina says, speaking in the same tone one might use to address a faculty meeting. In a less intimidating household, it would have been much harder to hold in a laugh. Was this always how she spoke to her children? For their sake, you hoped not (though the concept was amusing). Regardless, it is at this point that the daughters notice you, with one of them looking intrigued enough to send a shiver down your spine. You’re pretty sure her name is Daniela, being the only one you haven’t met before today. A toothy grin spreads on her lips, and once you make eye contact you swear that she winks at you. This literally could not be any worse, you think, unable to stop yourself from frowning.

“Does it have to do with this little thing?” Daniela purrs, taking a step towards you. Instantly both Alcina and yourself are tensing up. While your soulmate shifts in front of you, an incredibly faint rosy tint to her cheeks, all you can do is pinch the bridge of your nose between two fingers.

“This ‘little thing’ is not your newest playtoy, Daniela. Rather, they are my-” she hesitates, disliking the way the word feels in her mouth- “soulmate. I expect the three of you to behave, understood? At the very most, you are allowed to prevent them from leaving the premises, but even then I expect you to remain gentle. Have I made myself clear?” Alcina asks. Now she’s not the only one blushing, as Daniela looks so embarrassed that you wonder if she’ll pass out. Maybe now you’ll think twice about flirting with everyone you meet, you think, remembering the various rumors you’ve heard about her. For a moment, part of you imagines what your relationship with her would look like, were you to continue ‘courting’ her mother. Could this be a moment you could torment her with for life? Get some cheeky revenge for all the maidens who couldn’t risk it? A lovely thought, though one soon interrupted.

“Of course, mother. We will not lay a single finger on them, unless we have no other choice. Right, sisters?” Bela replies, turning to her siblings with an expectant look. Neither of them seem terribly pleased, but they nod, each giving their own verbal affirmations. All three spend a few moments glancing you over, reevaluating you now that they know who you are, appraising your worth. It’s not hard to imagine that they all find you lacking- at least in comparison to their mother. “Are introductions in order? We’ve met before, but I hardly know anything about them. It would be… nice to properly meet the newest edition to our family.” The way Bela says the words makes you nervous, and the way Cassandra grins only worsens the feeling.

“If you desire such, I see no reason to forgo such a thing. Perhaps the three of you could give them a tour? I must return to my duties, and I doubt they have seen much of the castle, given their… former occupation,” Alcina admits, softly. Was this a confirmation that you’d no longer have to spend every day working yourself to the bone? On one hand you were somewhat relieved, but you also regretted the possible loss of your preferred coping method. Worse, were you really going to spend who knows how long with the dreaded Dimitrescu daughters? They were going to rip you to shreds, at least verbally, you were sure of it. How could you ever meet their expectations? If they were anything like their mother, you would never be enough to satisfy them. Or at least that is what you assumed.

“I’ve seen a fair bit,” you interject, awkwardly, hating the way it brings everyone’s gaze back to you. Alcina’s lips twitch, as she fights back a frown. Evidently she didn’t appreciate you countering her suggestion.

“Please, we insist,” Bela fires back, a pleasant tone covering her thinly-veiled animosity. “I’m sure we’ll have a wonderful time getting to know each other. You do want to learn more about your soulmate’s children, don’t you?” Something about the way she speaks makes you want to laugh. When you smile back at her, it’s without a hint of any placating intentions, rather a dewdrop of mischief. Bold of her to assume that you wanted to make her mother happy. After all, it was clear from her phrasing that this was a ‘test’, a ruse to ‘reveal your true colors’ to Alcina. But you were as uneasy about your part in this as Bela was, neither of you finding yourself a suitable match for Alcina. Despite the way she narrows her eyes at you, her mother is smiling again, glad that she had a way to keep you occupied for the time being.

“It’s settled then,” she says, moving to give each of her daughters a kiss on top of their heads. They giggle at the affection, looking rather proud of themselves. Then she turns to you, hesitating, clearly having the instinct to give you a kiss as well. Half of you wants to stand on your tippy-toes, expectantly, wondering if she’d do it (and how flustered it would make her). Instead, you pretend not to notice, accepting the awkward shoulder pat she ends up giving you. “I will see you this evening, for dinner. Do try to enjoy yourself. But don’t forget-” she leans in until her mouth is right next to your ear, breath tickling your neck- “behave yourself. I will not tolerate any tomfoolery, understood?” Alcina does not pull away until you’ve nodded, and you do not relax until the library door has shut behind her.

Except now you’re alone with her daughters. Wonderful.

---------------------------

Dealing with finances was not, to put it simply, Alcina’s ‘favorite’ activity. Although she employed someone to handle the majority of the paperwork, she made sure to go over it herself to ensure accuracy. There were many aspects to her business, being both legitimate and illegitimate, technically. One could never be too careful about their records. After all, failing to file tax returns had taken down Al Capone, of all people. Who was to say that such a mistake, or one in a similar vein, could not damage House Dimitrescu? Certainly it wouldn’t be enough to ruin them entirely, but it could lead to certain ‘nuisances’ bothering the village. At the end of the day, Alcina cared more about the impact it would have on Mother Miranda than anything else, even the possible decline of her household.

A nasty habit, really. Few knew the extent of her self-entitled devotion to the cult leader. The only bond that ran deeper was that she had with her daughters, who meant more to her than she could ever vocalize. Even then, she viewed them as a gift from Miranda, which in turn strengthened her love for the woman. Now that love leaked into everything she did. With a flourish of her pen, she signed away some of this month’s earnings. So what if she already ‘donated’ a large portion of her income to the village and its leader? Certainly this was a way to show the level of her devotion? Certainly Miranda would take notice, eventually? Praise her for it? Take Alcina’s hand in her own, thumb caressing her skin, eyes filled with a long-sought affection?...

The sound of passing footsteps brings her back into the moment, and Alcina stares down at the mountain of paperwork she’d yet to approve. With a deep sigh she readjusts her reading glasses, sets the finished document aside, then gets back to work. A part of her mind soon starts to drift to other subjects. To you, primarily. Would your affection be easier to gain? Steadier?... But could it, in any way, compare to Miranda’s? No matter how she tries to brush the thoughts away, they nip at her heels, circling her head like vultures. Only time would give her the relief she so desperately sought.

---------------------------

“So, don’t tell me you really think you’re my mother’s soulmate, right?” Cassandra says, somewhat grumbling, as you trail behind Bela. It’s less than five minutes into the tour, with the siblings having behaved so far, focused on actually showing you around. At her words, both her sisters started walking slower. Their gazes were still locked ahead of themselves. The way they positioned themselves, however, made it clear that they were listening. “Is it some elaborate scheme, hmm? Did you spend a dozen hours with the other servants, noting every last detail about her soul mark, before copying it? Do you really think that you’ll get away with this?” Well, ‘twas good to know who the most paranoid of the three were.

“Ah, yes, it’s all a great, horrible ruse. You’ve caught me red-handed, I’m afraid,” you chime, sarcastically. A hand goes to your forehead as you fake faintness. “I’m just so desperate to be scrutinized by yourself and your mother, to have my every movement watched, to somehow be less free than I already was. I simply… cannot… believe… that you saw through my bluff.” With that you give a dramatic sigh, pausing in the hallway to give Cassandra a judgemental look. If not for Alcina’s instructions to keep you safe, you’re certain she would have beheaded you on the spot. “I’m not claiming to understand the universe’s decision. But I’m also not giving up immediately, no matter how much the three of you scare me.” At that, Bela stops in her tracks, slowly turning to you. Instinctively you go to take a step backwards, only for Cassandra to catch you, holding you in place. Next thing you know, the oldest daughter is grabbing your head, staring you right in the eyes.

“Answer one question, and maybe I’ll make sure you don’t fall victim to some tragic, unfortunate accident. Can you see yourself loving my mother?” Bela asks, more intense than you’ve ever seen her before. Despite that, you don’t tremble, swallowing your fear long enough to reply.

“Honestly? I don’t know. She’s terrifying… and beautiful. Cruel to some of the maidens I’ve met… and loving to you three. I… I don’t know if I can love her,” you admit, gulping. “But isn’t that part of the point of trying? To find out? I am going to try, for both my sake and hers, to love her. To cherish her. What more would you ask of me? I cannot tell you how the days to come will go, whether or not your mother will enjoy them, or even whether she could love me. This is not a situation you can threaten into resolving the way you want it to. So let me go, finish the tour, and give me a chance. You owe your mother that much, do you not?” Soon enough the hands keeping you in place loosen their grip, and Bela turns away with a scoff. Honestly, you can hardly believe that your little speech worked. You aren’t given much time to celebrate, however, as the sisters quickly resume their walking. Before long, Daniela is speaking up between giggles.

“I like this one already.”

#alcina dimitrescu x reader #lady dimitrescu x reader #alcina dimitrescu #lady dimitrescu #resident evil: village #re8 village #gremlin trio is protective #they're like #you're not cool enough for our mom #hey tumb please stop fucking up the order of my tags #this is the second time you've messed up my attempt at being funny

[diana-bookfairchild]

City of Lost Souls: Epilogue (Or - 5+1 Why Clace is Good)

Okay, I know a lot of people hate Clace and think it's cringey, and honestly, rereading the first books and remembering Clary's age, has made me reevaluate a whole lot of stuff I thought was romantic in it. The incest is. . . extremely just. . . And City of Fallen Angels really paints Jace as an asshole. But after the incest plotline is discarded and after the garbage fire that was Clace in CoFA. . . .

I do still love Clace. An excellent example of why is the epilogue of City of Lost Souls.

I didn't like other parts of the book for many reasons. The writing was beautiful, and Simon and Clary's love for each other was apparent throughout, and Isabelle Lightwood pining is always a marvellous read, but I hated how Clary went ahead and threw herself in without thinking of the consequences and her family, took ridiculously impulsive decisions while there (I mean, have you thought of how much could've been avoided if Clary had chosen to search Sebastian's room instead of going after him? She'd have found the ring earlier, probably realized the Seelie Queen's betrayal and gotten to know the plan and communicate with Simon much easier; I especially love and hate the scene where Simon sits at the farmhouse thinking to Clary about how he loves her without any response) and most of all, took Jace's choice away from him.

Of course I'm glad Jace didn't die, but it was Jace's choice to make, not Clary's, and however suicidal it was, it would be Jace who would have to live with whatever he did under Sebastian's control. Case in point, killing Maryse in Edom - which really made me think about how if Clary had allowed him to turn himself in, that mess of a world wouldn't exist.

Which is why I'm glad that Clary apologized to him first when she saw him again. And that, when Jace waved it off, she brought it up again later on and promised not to do it again.

Honestly, the epilogue is one of the best relationship negotiations I have ever read. We've always seen how ridiculously codependent Clary and Jace are, and how their relationship has deteriorated steadily, but this is genuinely a really, really good heatfelt talk that for me sets the tone of Clace and makes me really ship them.

1. Clary is not in it only for sex. Of course we all know this, but it's nice to see it anyway. The Heavenly Fire hasn't changed anything except giving her a boyfriend with a lot of moodswings and some sexual frustration.

She felt his breath catch, but he didn’t move. At first he sat still, but slowly the tension drained from his body and they leaned together. It wasn’t hot and heavy, but it was companionable and sweet.

2. The way they immediately go to their trademark humour without letting the conversation lose its seriousness Jace likes to deal with emotions with humour. And he admits himself that Clary's sardonic and deadpan humour is part of the reason he fell in love with her. That they're on the same page after everything. sharing the same sense of humour, how Clary can always disarm Jace, do the opposite of what he's expecting, it speaks well of their relationship.

“Cool, huh?” Jace said proudly. She turned and looked at him. “Ducks?” she said again. A smile tugged the edge of his mouth. “I hate ducks. Don’t know why. I just always have.”

Jace was looking at her incredulously. “Let me get this straight,” he said. “You came here to apologize to me?” She was taken aback. “Of course I did.” “Clary,” he said. “You saved my life.” “I stabbed you. With a massive sword. You caught on fire.” His lips twitched, almost imperceptibly. “Okay,” he said. “So maybe our problems aren’t like other couples’.”

“You’re right,” Clary said. “Our problems really aren’t like other people’s problems.” Jace stared at her incredulously. Slowly he closed his hands into fists, and the fire vanished, leaving only his ordinary, familiar, unharmed hands behind. Half-choking on a laugh, he said, “That’s what you have to say?”

He cleared his throat. “You know this means that what we did—what we almost did in Paris—” “Going to the Eiffel Tower?” He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “You never let me off the hook for a single minute, do you? Never mind. It’s one of the things I love about you.

“I really wish you hadn’t worn that sweater,” he muttered into her ear. “It’s good practice for you,” she replied, her lips moving against his skin. “Tomorrow, fishnets.” Against her side, warm and familiar, she felt him laugh.

3. Jace talks about how he fell in love with her I really adore these bits; one complaint is how Clace happened too quick and too intense, but these show how Jace felt. A shadowhunter taught to hide his emotions and be brave and kill demons meets someone who's as brave and stubborn as he is, and who can break his walls down with equal sincerity and perfectly aimed jabs. It happened quick, but sixteen-year-olds do plenty quick. Their relationship has gone through its ups and downs, but based on this, it has a very solid foundation.

“Seems fair to me,” he said. “Do you think I don’t know you, Clary? The girl who walked into a hotel full of vampires because her best friend was there and needed saving? Who made a Portal and transported herself to Idris because she hated the idea of being left out of the action?”

“I fell in love with you,” he said, “because you were one of the bravest people I’d ever known. So how could I ask you to stop being brave just because I loved you?” He ran his hands through his hair, making it stick up in loops and curls that Clary ached to smooth down. “You came for me,” he said. “You saved me when almost everyone else had given up, and even the people who hadn’t given up didn’t know what to do. You think I don’t know what you went through?” His eyes darkened. “How do you imagine I could possibly be angry with you?”

4. They talk about protecting one another One of the running themes has been the couple making decisions for one another, which has never either ended well or given their relationship a particularly healthy look. Here, while sprinkled with humour, this serious conversation addresses that issue. They agree they need to let each other be brave and make their own decisions, while expressions their opinions, letting them be themselves and protecting one another, but not from everything.

“I knew you’d say that. But the thing is, sometimes you do. And sometimes I do. We’re meant to protect each other, but not from everything. Not from the truth. That’s what it means to love someone but let them be themselves.”

“Well, that, and—Did you not listen to anything you just said? That whole business about protecting each other?” “I will have you know I practiced that speech. In front of a mirror before you got here.” “So what do you think it meant?” “I’m not sure,” Jace admitted, “but I know I look damn good delivering it.” “God, I forgot how annoying the un-possessed you is,” Clary muttered. “Need I remind you that you said that you have to accept you can’t protect me from everything? The only way that we can protect each other is if we are together. If we face things together. If we trust each other.” She looked him directly in the eye. “I shouldn’t have stopped you from going to the Clave by calling for Sebastian. I should respect the decisions you make. And you should respect mine. Because we’re going to be together a long time, and that’s the only way it’s going to work.”

5. They know one another. Extremely well. Clary is able to tell when Jace needs rest, when he needs more information and when he doesn't, what he'd like, when he needs humour, seriousness and reassurance and who he's referring to just by his expression. Jace forgiving her also shows he knows who she is.

“But if you did know anything, Jace, he would just change his plans,” Clary objected. “He knows he lost you. You two were tied together. I heard him scream when I stabbed you.” She shivered. “It was this horrible lost sound. He really did care about you in some strange way, I think. And even though the whole thing was awful, both of us got something out of it that might turn out to be useful.” “Which is… ?” “We understand him. I mean, as much as anyone can ever understand him. And that’s not something he can erase with a change of plans.” Jace nodded slowly. “You know who else I feel like I understand now? My father.” “Valen—no,” Clary said, watching his expression. “You mean Stephen.”

6. They love each other. The most important thing. Enough said.

“My heart is your heart,” he said. “My hands are your hands.”

I love this quote so. much. Even if it refers to murder.

He lifted a hand as if he meant to touch her face, then put it down hastily. “I heard you, you know,” he said more softly. “Telling me I wasn’t dead. Asking me to open my eyes.”

He reached down into the collar of his shirt and drew out the Morgenstern ring on its chain. He pulled it over his head and, leaning forward, dropped it lightly into her hand. It was warm from his skin. “Alec got it back from Magnus for me. Will you wear it again?” Her hand closed around it. “Always.” His grin softened to a smile.

“Of course it’s not okay with me. I’m a teenage boy. As far as I’m concerned, this is the worst thing that’s happened since I found out why Magnus was banned from Peru.” His eyes softened. “But it doesn’t change what we are to each other. It’s like there’s always been a piece of my soul missing, and it’s inside you, Clary. I know I told you once that whether God exists or not, we’re on our own. But when I’m with you, I’m not.” She closed her eyes so he wouldn’t see her tears—happy tears, for the first time in a long time now. Despite everything, despite the fact that Jace’s hands remained carefully together in his lap, Clary felt a sense of relief so overwhelming that it drowned out everything else—the worry about where Sebastian was, the fear of an unknown future—everything receded into the background. None of it mattered. They were together, and Jace was himself again. She felt him turn his head and lightly kiss her hair.

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk: Why Clace can be a wholesome relationship while being between teenagers and extremely cringey. Ignoring the incest in the second and third books. I'm just not thinking about it.

#clace #clary fairchild #jace herondale #city of lost souls #healthy relationships

[vivithefolle]

what do you think of snape and draco

Vivi's Opinion on Snape

Very much NOT a character for me. I can love a bitter sarcastic asshole, but not when said bitter sarcastic assholery is directed to little kids that literally never asked for any of this.

He contributed to winning the war. Immensely. No, he's not an incel or a stalker. No, he's not "the Stalin to Voldemort's Hitler", what the actual fuck, people who use that comparison seriously please stop and reevaluate all your life choices thank you.

I do actually enjoy writing Snape because... thanks to him I get to absolutely tear a new one to Harry and Hermione right there in my fanfiction and you can't even say I'm doing bashing because it's not bashing, it's Snape. Thank you Severus for providing me with the opportunity to vent my bitterness about those characters in a totally inconspicuous way.

5/10. Not my cup of tea, might be yours. Helped protect the Hogwarts kids a lot, but what good is it to protect someone if you're gonna keep on bullying them afterwards? (If that reminds you of how James Potter saved Severus from the Whomping Willow only to have Snape's Worst Memory afterward, yes, yes I was making a parallel to that. Congrats Snape. You've successfully become what you most hated.)

Vivi's Opinion on Draco

Kill it.

I'm not kidding. I despise this thing from the deepest, darkest fathoms of my soul. To the point that I can't see it as a "human" character like I can conceivably do with Ron, or Hermione when she's not being Plot-Powered, or Harry sometimes occasionally.

You see, there's something I hate more than a bully... it's a bully that gets away with it. But not just get away, oh no. A bully that gets worshipped in spite of it. Because I saw it happen up close. I was down there in the mud and the bully was someone I thought my friend. That's probably why I feel an amount of sympathy for Barty Crouch Jr. I know the feel, dude. In a slightly less insane-obsessive-murdery-zealous way.

I will feel sympathy for Barty Crouch Jr who had a father that sucked so hard Voldemort managed to be a better one.

But Draco Malfoy? He had everything. Good parents who also happened to be fascist, eugenists assholes but were still good parents. A life of privilege, of never wanting for anything, of throwing tantrums and always getting his way.

Life then becomes kinda hard for him for a bit. Because Voldemort sucks. Voldemort sucks and still he was a better parental figure than Barty Crouch Sr can you believe, how the fuck. Anyway Draco Malfoy's life becomes kinda hard for a while. But he's still happy to try and give Harry&Co to Voldemort because hey he still wants to get cookie points in case Voldy wins.

... and the fandom then thinks that "he was a child" constitutes a reasonable excuse for all this shit.

Okay. Okay.

Fine, he was a child. Children can be horrid, hideous little bullies, yes, absolutely. He was a child, he didn't know better, so he threw slurs around like they're candy, yes, fine, that is true. He was a child... that gives him a pass for year 1 to 5, yeah, I can get that.

... I've yet to meet a child that smuggled a group of wanted terrorists inside his own school so they could have themselves a little murder party though. I've yet to meet a child who tried to murder someone multiple times and almost got multiple people killed as a result, though.

And most of all... most important of all... I've yet to seen a child who effectively does all that, and is immediately covered with sympathy and fanarts and woobie AMVs for it.

I despise Draco Malfoy. I loathe him, and everything he represents, and everytime I come accross someone who tries to justify his actions I feel this ulcer burn in my stomach. I've had to read with my own two eyes "bullying is never a choice" in regards to Draco Malfoy's behaviour. Oh really. Oh, really. My bullies never really made the choice to use their little bully legs and go out of their little bully way to plant their little bully ass in front of glasses-wearing, non-threatening, could-get-carried-off-by-a-mild-breeze-looking little Vivi... Every single day. Every single day, at every single recess, for five fucking years.

No. Absolutely not, of course. Of course they didn't have a choice. They absolutely never meant it when they called me names or threw stones at me. Nah, sometimes you see a good opportunity to be a bitch to someone and you just gotta use it, man, it's not like you were making a choice, your entire body spontaneously decided without your input that it was gonna harass someone and you couldn't stop it because, well, it's not like you had a choice right?

-1000000000/1. Revolting. Disgusting. Repulsive. Another reason why I don't like Harry is that he didn't let the bastard burn in the Fiendfyre. But then we'd get thousands upon thousands of """fix-it fics :)""" where Hermoanie Granger time-travels back to the Battle of Hogwarts to save her one twu wuv Dwako Malfucked from his fiery demise and I admit that this AU is not one I'd want to live in, blargh. Meh. Maybe I could've written a parody where Hermione, while saving Dwakkie-poo, catches fire and burns to a crisp along with him. I mean, Dramione is already the tale of a girl setting herself on fire to keep a bastard warm, so I'd just be speed-running it to its logical conclusion.

#vivi answers #harry potter #anti dramione #severus snape #anti draco malfoy #bartemius crouch jr

[sepublic]

Through the Looking Glass Ruins!!!!!

         …

         SO! Onto other things first…

         WRATH IS BRAXAS’ FATHER!??!!? HOLY SHIT, Wrath is a canonical dad, I’d always expressed my… OH MY GOD WRATH IS DAD! And of BRAXAS, that sweetie… How is Braxas such a sweetie with a father like HIM, also-

         Wrath was in casual wear? Either he has a day off, or he got fired by Belos/Kikimora after drawing Luz a map to Eda in Young Blood, Old Souls! Either way this guy has a sudden new level of NUANCE that I am reeling from, and yes I checked, that really is Wrath according to the credits! Dang this puts everything in a WHOLE new light…!

         AMITY HAIR OHMIGOD IT LOOKS SO ADORABLE SHE’S SELF-ACTUALIZING I AM FUCKING SCREAMING HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD!!! OH MY GOD OH MY GOD, it’s PINK and not green… They acknowledged it, Emira did! And they CHANGED IT I AM LOSING MY FUCKING MIND OVER THIS-

         She looks so BEAUTIFUL and I love the kind of foreshadowing with the bookends of our first shot of Amity having her hair down, and now it’s changed! And she looks adorable and EMIRA AND EDRIC BEING GREAT SIBLINGS I LOVE IT SO MUCH! This… THIS is everything I wanted! I was resigned to not much of them but HELL YEAH they’re being good siblings and we get a look at their rooms, we see them doing MAKEOVERS together this is everything from my favorite fanon content and MORE,

         Also Edric has a date?! Emira says ‘their’ mom… Unless the Golden Guard has a mom, DARN! Not gonna lie, I half-expected a big twist at the end that Edric was dating the Golden Guard, who was doing some sort of reconnaissance as his unrecognized normal self and/or screwing around with the Blights even further, but in a GENUINE sense… But then who knows Kikimora could be posing as GG’s ‘mom’, this is a stretch anyhow-

         JUST HELL YEAH Blight Twins! Blight Twins being sweet and mischievous and supportive of each other, Blight SIBLINGS being siblings, Emira being an older sister and giving advice! And AMITY, Amity mentioning how much Luz has changed stuff, I love that they acknowledge it openly how her life has completely shifted, and now… NOW…!

         No necklace! Red leggings! PINK HAIR?! Is this why Amity in the intro hasn’t been updated yet… She was getting TWO updates, so the animators decided to only animate a change after this final update?!

         King and Gus are also friends it seems, and they even recorded some fun together! I’m surprised at how much Bria and the others mock Gus’ illusion skills… Obviously Belos is kinda terrible but like; I don’t think he’d set aside an entire subset of magic into Illusions without reason! Also that nightmare trip… I LOVE IT, I love Gus applying the creativity of illusions in their ability to completely warp and distort someone’s sense of reality! And I called that dragon-thing being an illusion!

         A graveyard… I wonder if the Gallderstones (is that how it’s spelled) have any relevance or if they’re just neat? I hope Mattholomule and Gus help hide the Looking Glass Graveyard… Damn, that’s another Death reference with Gus, huh! Is it culminating in his respect for the dead, or will it continue further with Gus being a necromancer, or an Oracle who can commune with the deceased, and he has their respect as someone who treats them properly?!

         Also not to get dark but… What if all those Illusionists are dead because of Belos? I’m JUST SAYING…! And not gonna lie, every time someone insulted Illusions, I kept imagining the Illusion Head just suddenly waking up and feeling like there’s a disturbance in the force, as well as a weird compulsion to beat up some Glandus kids. It’d be even funnier if he had beef with the Construction, Plant, and Abomination Heads as well!

         Speaking of which, more confirmation on Construction Magic being related to earth! Glad to see Bria give us a look into that, which furthers my idea of Belos using construction magic… Also dang, Bria and the Glandus Kids really are the parallels/foils to the Detention kids! You’ve got the short ‘nice’ girl, the tall lanky kid, the furry… But the Glandus Kids start off looking nice and cool, but turn out to be rather nasty!

         Meanwhile the Detention Kids seem like bad news and delinquents, but no! They’re just demonized and actually very kind and chill! The Detention Kids are looked down upon, the Glandus Kids are appraised… The Detention Kids are dual-track, the Glandus Kids are singular; Glandus Kids from, well, GLANDUS, Detention Kids from Hexside… One’s ‘mischief’ is actually very neat and cool, the other’s is literal grave robbing.

         I guess that’s how the bleeding statues got past the censors- It’s technically just an illusion! Also more insight into how Glandus works with its Survival of the Fittest mentality, I wonder if we’ll get confirmation on which coven heads came from there, how that might influence them as adults…

         What is Glandus like, is it more whole-heartedly accepting of Belos’ rule, hence its harsh ideals? Was it made after Hexside? Does Bump hate it for being so cruel like that, or is it just school bias? And dang poor Mattholomule, I always had a feeling he sort of felt and knew that he wasn’t much, so he accepted and compensated by deliberately doing whatever he can for power…

         They confirmed he’s from Glandus, and I appreciate this new look at him! This new leaf turned… Hot take but he’s honestly not as bad as Boscha, his stint with Gus was a one-time thing that Gus was able to live with! And that seems pretty good to set them up as friends! Speaking of Boscha, Willow was injured by pixies? And the last time we heard of pixies, they belonged to Boscha and caused the school to get shut down… Did BOSCHA DO THIS I SWEAR SHE IS DEAD TO ME-

         (Also she’s mentioned in the credits for this episode but I don’t remember hearing her? I might’ve gotten distracted with so much other things.)

         Gus! I like the insight into his relationship with Illusions, and I appreciate how he’s considering other forms of magic… But this hesitation might just serve to reaffirm his believe in Illusions, which is okay! It’s all about choice… And yeah, it seems Gus also has a case of impostor syndrome like King, no wonder they get along so well! I love the glimpses into Gus’ house and the confirmation that he has a library card, no Perry though alas…!

         I appreciate how Gus feels overlooked, like he has no real substance, which is how his Illusions reflect a desire to draw attention, but also the idea that there’s nothing real beneath them… Again, very much like King! And Gus, he’s not a powerhouse like the rest, he’s SKILLED and smart, but strength isn’t his forte, it’s not brute force he operates on, but cleverness! Trickery, I like it…! It’s a nice callback to his last A-plot episode, SVSF, where instead of fighting Mattholomule physically, Gus’ solution is to think outside the box and pull the alarm!

         You go kid, not relying on brute strength but showing that some clever tricks and thinking are just as valid! Kinda wonder if this episode is lowkey a discussion on masculinity for young boys, especially with Gus growing older with puberty, though the latter is mostly because his actual VA grew… But maybe the writers rolled with that and incorporated it, or it’s just a very neat coincidence! Also, it is me or did Mattholomule’s voice change? And the gag that Gavin’s dad looks identical to him, even moreso because he’s NOT supposed to have a moustache… That’s great!

         Malphas! Love this reference to a classic demon, I wasn’t sure if Malphas was the librarian with glasses whom I’ve always headcanoned as a father figure to Amity… But maybe it’s actually this bird dude! He seems adept in Bard magic, and I love the reveal of his true crow appearance… Guess those theorists were right that the one-eyed figure is from the Forbidden Stacks! Also Malphas NOT COOL with Amity, but I’m glad Luz changed his mind, and I wonder how that adventure looked…

         Which- DAMN, the RSD with Luz! She looks so UTTERLY BROKEN when Amity mentions doing stupid things, and she didn’t mean it like that, but Luz just looks so completely shattered and you can tell she wants to cry but instead she bottles it up and tries to take it in stride, and that plays into her trying to overcompensate for her mistakes AGAIN… SOMEONE GET IT TO HER HEAD that she doesn’t need to! I’m scared for Luz, and I was SO scared this episode would end on a bad note…

         BUT DOAHLDdFAEONDKFHN LUMITY KISS LUMITY KISS! ONE-SIDED BUT THEY FINALLY FUCKING KNOW AND AMITY IS LIKE WHAAAAT AND I WAS WAITING FOR IT AND I COULD FEEL IT HAPPEN AND GAY KISS! GAY KISS ON-SCREEN!!! And the way Luz just FLOPS to the ground on her knees AAHJJFFKHGGK and no Alador nor Odalia to ruin this, UTTERLY PERFECT and the twins WATCHING OOOHHHHGGGG YYYEEAAAAHHH-

         This is EVERYTHING I ever wanted!

         What an AMAZING episode with wonderful characer beats and reveals! Again, Amity’s growth as a character, that brief insight into how Luz as a person is very chaotic and sometimes frustrating for Amity and forces her to reevaluate, but ultimately it’s good and Luz DOES try her best, and Amity clearly wanted to make things up for Luz and apologize, they’re BOTH doing things, just the little moments!

         Also, Alex Lawther voices Philip Wittebane! He has long hair and a vaguely british accent, he’s… He’s Belos isn’t he? And they got a new VA because having him voiced by Matthew Rhys would be really spoiler-y right? He’s got the long hair and he’s a nerd… And with how he talks of finding a way back home, maybe Belos really DOES just want to return home, after all? He talks of making a way back home…

         And we see a glimpse of the Portal, so it might’ve brought him there? Or did Philip succeed in making it, and that was his blueprint designs? Did he arrive by Titan’s Blood? What happened to the portal if it brought him there, or if he made it? Why the scar, why near Eda’s house, partially buried?

         Was it lost before he could finish his work, and Philip got side-tracked into something else… Perhaps going on a crusade, on behalf of a curse/demon that possessed him? A demon that killed King’s father…? Was the portal broken and he had to discard it, but then it naturally healed- Or did it just need to recharge, maybe Philip DID make it back home, WHAT IS THE ANSWER?! Is there some sort of doppelganger for Philip, is BELOS his doppelganger?! What is THIS WHAT-

         WHAT AN EPISODE!

#the owl house #lumity #the owl house gus #augustus porter #the owl house mattholomule #the owl house luz #luz noceda #the owl house amity #amity blight #the owl house bria #the owl house gavin #the owl house angmar #the owl house malphas #the owl house wrath #warden wrath #the owl house braxas #the owl house philip #philip wittebane #speculation #analysis #the owl house spoilers #spoilers #toh spoilers

[marjansmarwani]

maybe, I’m afraid 

3.8k || ao3

Episode 2x06, but with Carlos (as it should have been)

Just me here again to give Carlos the screen time he should have had. 

A little late to the party maybe (I have no idea how you all manage to get fics up within 24 hours of the episode, I am in awe of that ability) but I still felt the need to make my contribution.

--------

Most days Carlos was pretty sure that after 7 years on the force he had seen everything there was to see. 

Other days he got a call to respond to two teenagers trapped in a homemade minefield and he was forced to reevaluate that sentiment. 

It doesn’t take long to figure out all there is to know, including just how bad it really is, and by the time the familiar ladder truck pulled up (because of course it was the 126) he was waiting outside the passenger door to give Owen the rundown. 

“Officer Reyes,” he greeted when he saw him, “I’m surprised to see you. I thought this would be a little out of your jurisdiction.” 

Carlos shook his head, “Just barely within it, another half-mile and the sheriffs would be handling the call.”

“But you managed to snag it, lucky you.”

“Can’t say I would have been too upset if I had missed out on this one,” Carlos agreed drily. 

Owen hummed in agreement as he surveyed the scene, “What are we looking at, exactly?”  

It was a bleak picture: two brothers, trapped. One injured, both scared and stuck in an active minefield without a map. And the bomb squad was at least 40 minutes out. He saw his concern reflected on Owen’s face as he considered the situation and all the implications. If they waited, the boy would die. If they went in, he would be possibly sending some of his people to die too. 

And yet Carlos knew what choice he was going to make before he even opened his mouth. He had learned so many things during his time with TK, and one of them was that in so many ways he and his dad were a lot alike. If it were his call, TK wouldn’t have been able to leave those boys in there either. So when the instruction came, he wasn’t surprised. 

“We’re going to need the heaviest duffel we can find and spray paint - the brighter the better.”

Carlos locked eyes with TK briefly as he and the rest of his team turned to start gathering supplies, giving him a smile and hoping that it conveyed everything he wanted him to know: it would be alright, no matter what. 

He almost believed it too. 

All was calm at the start, the 126 functioning like the well-oiled machine they were. In no time they were prepped and Owen was striding back towards the ambulance, asking the new guy if he was ready to go. The discussion quickly transformed into an argument and Carlos couldn’t help but glance back over at the minefield and the brothers. Every moment they argued was one less moment these boys had. Carlos was considering stepping in when a new voice entered the discussion, effectively bringing the escalating argument to a halt. 

“I’ll go.” 

And Carlos froze because he knew that voice. He would know it anywhere, it drew him like a moth to a flame in any room. He turned slowly to find TK standing slightly apart from his crew, stance relaxed but jaw set in determination. 

“I was a dual function FD medic in New York,” he explained, voice calm and firm, “all my certifications are up to date. I can do this.” 

Carlos didn’t need to be looking at him, didn’t need to see where his gaze shifted to know that those last words were directed at his dad. The knowledge made Carlos’s heart ache. The fact that his boyfriend still felt the need to prove himself to his dad after all this time and all he had accomplished killed him, but the thought of TK willingly walking into the minefield killed him even more. 

But it wasn’t his choice to make and when Owen nodded, he felt a cold dread spread throughout his body. This wasn’t how today was supposed to go. Today was not supposed to be the day he watched his boyfriend walk into an active minefield. That day was never supposed to come, and yet here it was. 

He walked over to where TK was switching out his gear, struggling with a strap that was twisting over his shoulder. He reached out for the strap without a word, smoothing it out and snapping it in place. They didn’t speak as Carlos stepped back, surveying the harness and gear for any other twists or issues. 

“It’s going to be fine, Carlos.” 

TK’s voice, soft and reassuring, broke the silence and Carlos met his eyes sharply. He wanted so desperately to believe him, but there was a field filled with explosives that had already claimed one life today behind them and he was finding it hard to be optimistic. 

“Are you sure about this?” he asked instead. 

TK pulled his helmet on, his steady gaze never leaving Carlos, “Of course I’m sure, the kid’s going to die if we don’t go out there, Carlos. I need to help if I can.” 

Carlos reached down to grab his medical bag and held it out to him. He didn’t like the thought of the man he loved purposefully putting himself in harm’s way, but he also knew TK. As much as he might hate it sometimes, this was TK: always ready to help, always willing to put himself at risk if it meant saving someone else, and there was nothing Carlos could do to change that. And he wouldn’t want to - it was a part of TK that made him who he was: someone that Carlos loved with all his heart. 

When TK reached out to take the bag from him, he didn’t release it immediately. He let his grip linger for an extra moment as he studied TK, his heart pounding in his chest.

“Just, be careful,” he told him softly. TK gave him a small smile, and Carlos released his grip on the bag, allowing TK to walk away, towards the minefield. He was still watching as he ascended the ladder that would drop him out onto the minefield when he felt the presence of others appearing at his side. 

“He’ll be okay kid,” Judd said quietly, eyes never leaving the sight of the two Strands climbing to the end of the ladder. 

“You don’t know that Judd,” Carlos responded just as quietly, already feeling his fingernails digging into his palm as he clenched his hands at his side. 

“No,” the older man agreed softly, “I don’t. But I do know they’ll be as careful as they can.” 

Carlos nodded, eyes tracking every movement desperately. They had reached the edge of the ladder now and he watched as Owen tossed down the duffel, as they both reeled back in preparation for an explosion. He could feel his heart skip a beat and his breath catch in his throat as they waited, but there was only silence and after a moment, he allowed himself to breathe again. 

“I don’t know if my heart can take this,” Paul lamented from his left, “that was nerve-wracking and they still have a long way to go.” 

Carlos nodded wearily, but caught his retort before it slipped out of his mouth: if they made it that far. He didn’t need to release that idea into the universe and the others didn’t need to hear it. So he swallowed it and continued watching. Each and every movement they made was agonizing to watch, but each and every thud of them landing unharmed gave him a moment to catch his breath, a brief reprieve for his heart to beat normally. They had settled into a rhythm, and everything was going smoothly. 

Until it wasn’t. 

The sound of the mine exploding filled the air around them and worked its way into Carlos’s soul. It sent shockwaves through his body as he watched, desperately trying to see through the haze of smoke and debris. He couldn’t see him, he didn’t know if he was okay. 

That fact was more than enough to bring on the fear. It attacked him with a vengeance, freezing him to the spot. He felt as if the whole world froze in that moment; suspending him in the terror of not knowing, trapping him with doubt and fear. 

And then he heard TK’s voice, and he could breathe again. It might just be the most wonderful thing he had ever heard. 

When Owen’s voice sounded across the radios, confirming that they were both in one piece, time picked back up at its usual pace. He felt himself sag in relief, grateful for the knowing and supportive hand on his shoulder from Judd. He spared a glance at the others, seeing his relief reflected on their faces and in their stances. 

Marjan let out a long breath, “That was…” 

“Intense,” Paul agreed grimly, “let’s never do that again.” 

They all nodded, and Carlos couldn’t agree more. 

If there was an upside to that moment it was that the path forward was now clear and the two Strands made quick work of the rest of the journey, closing the distance between them and the boys in seconds. Carlos watched in awe as TK slipped into medic mode the moment he reached the boys’ sides, calmly managing the scene and taking care of the patient. It was a wonder to watch. He handled it all with focus and compassion, quietly reassuring the boys even as he gave instructions to his dad and administered care. He was cool and steady even as he delivered the lifesaving compressions, forcing the teen’s blood to pump through his veins with his own hands. It was only minutes before his voice sounded over the radio, announcing that the injured boy was stable and no amount of fear or worry could have stopped the intense pride Carlos felt in that moment. 

“Kid’s got some skills,” Judd observed with a fond smile and Carlos could only grin. 

Paul nodded, “Looks like someone’s been holding out on us, that was pretty impressive I must admit.” 

“Badass is more like it!” Mateo exclaimed and Marjan, standing next to him, laughed even as she placed a hand on his arm. 

“Steady Probie,” she reminded him, “they still have to get out of there. Let’s not jinx anything.”

Her words tempered the celebratory mood of the group, but even though Carlos had never let go of that fear (he knew he wouldn’t until TK was out of the minefield and at least 2 miles away) it felt different from before. It was wrapped in that pride now, and even as Carlos watched them prep to move and the bomb squad moved out to locate and detonate any mines along the path, he couldn’t shake that. It was almost stronger than the fear now, this pride he felt for TK. That was his boyfriend; the person who had just saved two young brothers in the middle of a minefield was the man he loved. Just when he thought that he had come to know every bit of his body and soul, he managed to surprise him all over again. 

It took every ounce of restraint and professionalism Carlos had to not rush over to TK the moment he cleared the edge of the minefield. He forced himself to wait, focusing on his own job while keeping a watchful eye on TK as he reported back to Captain Vega, as he got an exam from the new paramedic. It wasn’t until he headed back to the ladder truck that Carlos broke away from the crowd, meeting him at the side of the engine. TK looked up as he approached, a smile on his face and a greeting on his lips, but Carlos pulled him into his arms before he even had a chance to speak. 

He held him tightly, savoring the feeling of his breath on his collar and the faint sound of the beating of his heart. His familiar scent filled Carlos’s head with each breath and he closed his eyes. He would have been happy to stand there forever, feeling this and just being them and while he knew they couldn’t, he was determined to have at least a few moments more before the world interrupted. If nothing else, the universe at least owed him this. 

“I’m okay Carlos,” TK said evenly, his voice muffled against Carlos’s shoulder. 

But you almost weren’t. The words rang through his head, but he didn’t speak them. Instead he pulled away just enough to see TK’s face as he asked, “Are you sure?” 

“Yes,” TK assured him firmly, placing a steady hand on his chest, “the new medic looked me over but I could have told you anyway, I’m fine. Not injured, my dad and I both made it out and so did the boys. This was a win Carlos, I’m more than okay.” 

And he was, Carlos saw as he studied him. He was beaming; enthusiasm pouring out of him. His eyes were alight with something Carlos couldn’t name and he was practically vibrating. Despite everything, Carlos couldn’t help but smile at the sight. He was still worried, still terrified by all the ‘what ifs,” but seeing TK like this gave him a lightness he couldn’t have imagined feeling even a few minutes before. 

He shook his head, trying to mask his smile with little success, “I am glad you’re so pleased with yourself, considering you almost gave the rest of us a heart attack.” 

He had been going for a joke but he instantly regretted it when TK dimmed, “I’m sorry,” he told him sincerely, “I didn’t mean to scare you guys, especially you. I just knew I could help…” 

Carlos interrupted him, moving his hands so they were on each of TK’s shoulders, “You have nothing to apologize for Ty,” he assured him firmly, “you did the right thing. You saved a kid’s life and you did amazing. I am so proud of you.” 

TK’s smile returned, softer than before but still glowing with pride, “You are, are you?” 

Carlos leaned down to place a soft and tender kiss on his forehead, “I am. So incredibly proud. You’re a pretty impressive guy, you know that?”

TK’s smile could have lit up the world and Carlos would have been happy to let it. But they were both still on the job and decidedly not alone, as they were suddenly reminded when Paul peaked around the side of the engine. He smirked at them before calling over his shoulder, “Yeah, they’re decent back here, you guys can come around.” 

Carlos rolled his eyes at his friend while TK casually flipped him off. Paul crossed towards them, completely unfazed before reaching out and pulling TK into a hug of his own. “You can’t keep scaring me like that man,” he told TK when they pulled apart, “I’m getting too old for that crap.” 

TK rolled his eyes at his teammate and Carlos chuckled. He looked behind him to see the rest of the team materializing. 

“That’s my cue,” he told TK, “I need to get back to work and get this scene wrapped up anyways. I’ll see you at home later?” 

TK nodded, reaching out to squeeze his hand, “I’ll be there right after my shift.” 

“Think you can make it until then without nearly dying on me again?” 

“I’ll do my best,” TK assured him and Carlos smiled. 

“That’s all I ask,” he responded, “I love you.” 

“Love you too, Carlos.” 

Carlos smiled at that, the warmth he felt every time he heard those words from TK rushing through him. With one last squeeze of the hand holding his own, he stepped away, letting TK’s team get in their time. As he reached the corner of the engine he looked back, still feeling the whirlwind of emotions deep in his chest. 

But TK was safe and happy - he couldn’t ask for anything more. So he turned the corner and returned to the task at hand. 

----------

“You know, that call today? It felt good, really good.” 

Carlos looked up from his dinner sharply to see TK idly playing with his, his focus clearly elsewhere. “Please don’t tell me this means you have decided to become a real-life minesweeper, I am going to have some objections to that,” Carlos deadpanned. 

TK laughed lightly, shaking his head, “No, not quite.” 

“Thank god, I don’t think my heart could handle that.” 

TK shook his head fondly at Carlos before his expression grew more pensive, “I didn’t mean the minefield, or even the danger or adrenaline. I meant the saving the boy part. I know I do that all the time as a firefighter, but there’s something different about doing it as a medic. I haven’t had the chance to really do any medical calls since moving to Austin, with the way the department is structured.” 

“You’ve never really talked about it before,” Carlos noted, “I’ve seen you do medical stuff in the field, but before today I didn’t even know you were dual certified.” 

TK shrugged, “It just never really came up, I guess. It’s pretty typical in New York, but their firehouses are structured differently. I guess once I made my peace with being down here I never really thought about it again. It’s not like I could do both the same way I used to.” 

His tone was almost wistful as he turned his gaze down to his plate, but Carlos had a feeling he wasn’t really seeing the food on it. “Sounds like you miss it,” he ventured after a few more moments of silence. 

“Sometimes I do.” 

“So why not go for it?” 

TK looked at him sharply, but Carlos just shrugged, “What? You’ve spent most of the past hour talking about it and you mentioned how the new guy quit and there’s an opening on the paramedic team within your first 10 minutes of showing up tonight. I know you and I know you’re already thinking about it, so why not try it?” 

“Even if I applied, there are so many other candidates. There’s no saying she’d pick me.”

“I wouldn’t be too sure about that. She knows you and how dedicated you are to your job. She saw you in action today, willing to take the risk that someone else wasn’t in order to save a patient. You did the job well and you did it under insane pressure after months of not doing it. If I were her, I’d be wondering what you’d be capable of on an average day.”  

TK looked startled at the efficient takedown of his doubts, but Carlos just raised an eyebrow, “Next?” 

He would dismantle his boyfriend’s doubts with logic one by one if need be. Whatever it took for him to start believing in himself the way Carlos did. 

“I’d have to leave the team,” he said softly, “I wouldn’t be working with them anymore. We’re like a family, I can’t just leave them.” 

Carlos reached across the table to take TK’s hand in his own, “It’s not like you’d be leaving the station,” he reminded him, “you’d still be in the same building and on the same schedule. And they’re not going to feel like you abandoned them, Ty, they’ll still be right there. And right here,” he added with a laugh, gesturing towards his living room, “we’ve fed them, I don’t think we are ever going to get rid of them now.” 

That pulled a smile out of TK, but there was still so much doubt in his eyes that it hurt Carlos to see it. 

“What do you think they would say, if you told them it was something you wanted?” he asked instead, “Do you think they would tell you to forget about it? To stay with them because it was more comfortable?” 

“No,” TK said quickly, “of course they wouldn’t.” 

“So why are you worried about them? They want what’s best for you and they always will. Unless,” he hedged when TK’s expression didn’t clear, “they’re not the ones you’re worried about.” TK pulled his gaze up from the table and Carlos saw all the confirmation in them that he needed, “Your dad?” 

TK nodded, and Carlos sighed. “TK…”

“It would be a big change Carlos,” he said softly. “Except for my probationary period, I have always worked with my dad. I don’t want him to take it personally.” 

“But it is a little personal, isn’t it?” 

He was careful to keep his tone even, non-judgemental and he watched TK closely, waiting for his response. 

“Maybe a little, yeah,” TK admitted. “I feel like this would be a way for me to really see who I am without him right there. It’s not like this is a reaction to him or any news he may have shared recently,” he added hastily, “I would hope I’m past the ‘blowing my life up to piss off my dad’ point, but it is something to consider. And…” 

He trailed off, but Carlos had a feeling he knew what was going to come next, “And you’re worried he might take it personally?” he suggested. 

TK nodded and Carlos sighed and set down his fork, reaching across the table again to pull both of TK’s hands into his own, “Look,” he began, “what’s important is why you’re thinking about this. So, what is it? Why are you thinking about becoming a paramedic?” 

“Because I think I’d love it,” TK said without any hesitation, “because I feel like it’s the best way I can help people.” 

Carlos smiled at him, squeezing the hands in his grasp softly, “Then I think you have your answer. You should do this because it is what you want and because it is right for you. That’s all that matters. Everything else - and everyone else - will fall into place.” 

“And if they don’t?” TK asked softly, and Carlos felt a pang in his heart at the sound of so much doubt in the other man’s voice. 

“They will,” Carlos assured him. “Nothing ever stays the same, remember? And your dad knows that. We all know that. And,” he added, leaning forward in his seat to close some of the distance between them, “I will be here for you, every step of the way. No matter what.”  

The smile TK gave him warmed every inch of his body. They sat in companionable silence for a while, intertwined hands connecting them across the table until TK spoke again. 

“If you really mean that,” he began with a grin, “I could probably use some help with my resume.” 

“Anything for you,” Carlos quipped back, but even as he said the words he squeezed their clasped hands. He meant that, in every way possible. He would be here for resumes and job interviews and everything in between, as long as TK wanted him to be. 

Judging by the way TK met his eyes, and the soft ‘thank you’ that fell from his lips, he had a feeling he felt the same way too. 

#911 lone star #911 lone star fic #tarlos #tarlos fic #carlos reyes #tk strand #my writing #tuserjamie #tuserpaige #userkimmy #userjilly #userac #usermaximus #userbones #jazzyjess #immortalstrand #reyeslonestartag #buckybarnesalways #maizsnex #hierophvnts

[1989xtaylorsversion]

folklore is taylor swift's best album, and i stand by that. (my album review)

hello swifties, i'm back.

folklore is taylor swift's eighth studio album, and in my humble opinion, it's her best. this album holds such a special place in my heart because it's what propelled me into being a full-time swiftie. i apologize in advance for how repetitive i'm going to get because i will be proclaiming my love for every track.

now that the pleasantries are done, let's talk about folklore aka the winner for AOTY (thank you scammy's, at least they did one thing right)

1. the 1

this song is so easy to love. it's fun, light, catchy, and so soothing. the opening line just grabs your attention, so good job ms. swift. i don't have a lot to say about it, but i think it was a great choice to make this the first track. it's one of her best album openers.

2. cardigan

i looove cardigan. the beginning may turn you off, but it PICKS UP by the third verse. i love the lyrics, and i loooove the music video. it's one of her most beautiful music videos, there's no argument. the fact that she made it during a pandemic - her power. also, selling the cardigans as merchandise was one of the best decisions she's made, they're beautiful.

3. the last great american dynasty

ok guys, here's the truth - this song was a grower. i didn't connect with it for a little bit, and i didn't really gravitate towards it. i never hated it, but it's one of the songs (yes you read that right, we'll get there) that took a minute for me to really appreciate. i eventually saw the light though because on one magical day, something shifted and i realized that it's a great song that deserves its hype.

4. exile ft. bon iver

I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH! if "exile" isn't in your top 3, you need to reevaluate some things. in my opinion, it's the best collaboration taylor has done. it is raw, emotional, soul-crushing, and above all magical. it transcends you into another world. the bridge and everything after is pure serotonin. i loved it from the second i heard it, and it's never let me down.

5. my tears ricochet

again, I LOVE THIS SONG!! it's also in my top 3, and it never left its place. it is so beautifully haunting. the lyrics and imagery really stay with you. there are so many meanings, so apply it to your life anyway you want. i have never felt true betrayal but this song makes me feel like i have. this is one of her strongest fifth tracks. thank you taylor, your good deeds won't be forgotten.

6. mirrorball

i can't believe i'm admitting this, but "mirrorball" was another grower. when i first heard it, my immediate reaction was, "wow this would be a great song to include in a movie when the main characters are slow dancing at a school dance." i still think that. but, one day i heard it again, and it opened my eyes to the fact that this song is amazing. the bridge is definitely my favorite part, and i hope it's your's.

the meaning is so sad, because taylor has expressed her fear that people aren't going to want to listen to her past a certain point, and she's always had to reinvent herself. it's interesting how females in the music industry have to constantly reinvent themselves, but males don't... hmm...

that's another topic, but it should be said.

anyway, i just want taylor to know she can literally release absolutely anything, and we will still listen. i just want her to be authentic, be happy, and make music that fulfills her.

7. seven

this song was another grower, and i'll be honest, it's not the song i gravitate towards a lot. but, i still love it. it's sweet, innocent, and soothing. the second verse is my favorite.

8. august

AUGUST STANS ARE WE HERE??

where do i even begin?? the second i hear the opening lines, i'm at peace. it is perfect. "august" is just pure serotonin packaged into a song. the bridge is immaculate. i've yet to meet anyone who doesn't like this song, and if you do, don't talk to me :)

also, i love the love triangle storyline lol. it makes the songs so much more interesting. there's not much to say except, thank you, taylor.

9. this is me trying

this song is so nice to listen to, and it's so easy to love. the lyrics are thoughtful, and the instrumentals enhance it so well. i really overplayed it when the album first came out lol. it's short and sweet.

10. illicit tears

wow, it was so rude of taylor to drop this soul-crushing song without any warnings and expect me to be fine. i'm still waiting for the apology video btw.

in all seriousness, this song is a masterpiece. the lyrics are so vivid, she's unbelievable. the bridge is unreal, it just makes you wanna scream (pun intended). i love the second verse, it just picks up from there. even though the storyline is sad, it is a gorgeous song. also, she taught me like 2 new words from this song, so thank you for expanding my vocabulary, taylor.

11. invisible string

swifties, this song is adorable. the idea of an invisible string connecting you and your soulmate is beautiful, and i hope we can all experience this feeling one day. it is such a cute song, i really enjoy it.

12. mad woman

this song was also a grower, but rest assured, i love it. i love the meaning, and when she dropped the f-bomb, it sure grabbed my attention.

13. epiphany

"epiphany" is beautiful. i know some people feel it's too sad, but i love sad songs, so i'm not complaining. it's calming, and her voice and the instrumentals are beautiful. i really enjoy it.

14. betty

wow, betty is a masterpiece. the harmonicas, oh my gosh. she curses in this one too, and it's great. the last chorus is unbelievable, i can't believe she actually made this song. taylor really treated us well, i'm so grateful.

would you forgive james? i wonder what people think of the love triangle.

15. peace

"peace" is so cute, it just makes me happy. it took a minute for it to grow on me, but i'm glad it did.

16. hoax

"hoax" is another hauntingly beautiful song. i think it was a good song to close with, and her vocals sound great.

17. the lakes

i wish this song made the final tracklist, but i'm glad she released it regardless. it's SO beautiful, i love everything about it. i wouldn't change a single thing. i love the meaning behind it, her lyricism is incredible. she turns into a superhero when she picks up that pen.

overall thoughts:

i don't know what else to add, i think i said it all in the beginning. this album came at the perfect time, taylor always knows when i need her. i'm so grateful for her because she just released music this year and said "here you go, enjoy." i have such happy memories with this album, it's one of my all-time favorites. it's one of my comfort albums, and i'll never grow tired of it.

my rating: 10/10

the weakest song: lol, you thought.

the strongest songs: my tears ricochet, illicit affairs, exile, mirrorball, august, and cardigan. those are the ones i gravitate towards the most, but let's be real, they're all strong and amazing. this was a hard choice to make.

THANK YOU TAYLOR SWIFT.

also, i hope you all enjoy fearless (taylor's version). see you soon swifties, xoxo.

#taylor swift #folklore #swifties #fearless taylor’s version #album of the year #my album review

[mysteriouspuccy]

I gotta say this is the weirdest time of my life.

I am actively, day by day, realising that there is more to life than just waking up and falling asleep. I am constantly having to reevaluate how i look after me, beyond the physical.

And it is in more than just a cliché manner. I have no choice anymore than to grow because the substance of my being, my soul if you may, wants more. So much more.

Also, I met people that made me realise that I need to be better, to work on myself. I want to show up and be of more value to their lives.

I want to be more than my trauma.

#griefrecovery #aromantic #me #drafts #self development

[himiko-yumehellno]

Beta au fan quotes part six:

*Kirumi and Shuichi on a roof*

Shuichi: I have a question.

Kirumi, while focusing on the mission she has to complete: Only if it’s important.

Shuichi: Do owls have eyelashes?

Kirumi:

Kirumi: *walks to the other side of the roof and calls Gonta and Kiyo*

Source: twitter

—

Angie: Okay, consider this.

Angie: Seatbelts. Except they throw you out of your seat, and they are called yeetbelts.

Rantaro, whispering under his breath while searching through his flash cards: What the fuck is a yeet?

Source: tumblr

—

Tenko: *gets down on one knee*

Tsumugi: Oh my god it’s finally happening.

Tenko: *ties her shoelaces*

Tsumugi, while tearing up: She finally stopped wearing fucking Velcro sneakers.

Source: tumblr

—

Kirumi: Goodnight. Sleep tight. Don't let the demons drag you into Hell and devour your soul.

Ryoma:

Ryoma: Nah, I'mma let them.

Source: tumblr

—

Kidnapper: We have your brother.

Kaito: I don’t have a brother.

Kidnapper: He won't stop crying about how we're going to get hurt since we took him; he made us reevaluate our life choices and now we feel really bad so can you come pick them up?

Kaito: Oh my god, you have Ouma.

Kidnapper: I’m going to become a painter.

Source: unknown

—

Angie: Change is inedible.

Kaede: You mean inevitable?

Angie: *spits out coins* I did not.

Source: unknown

—

Gonta: *tries to open door* It’s locked.

Kaito, while rolling up his sleeves: It’s okay. Locks are my specialty.

Kaito: *punches the door until it breaks*

Source: trollhunters

—

Tsumugi: I’m out too. If we’re just gonna be humiliated, I don’t s– wait, shut up.

Miu: Did you just tell yourself to shut up?

Tsumugi: Yeah, now you shut up too. 

Source: brooklyn nine nine

—

Kiibo: I really like this whole "good guy, bad guy" thing you guys have going on.

Rantaro: It’s not an act, it’s just that I’m mean and Shuichi isn’t.

Source: unknown

—

Kaito: At level 20 of ADHD you can read a book and listen to a podcast at the same time.

Kaito: At level 40 you can read a transcript of a podcast while listening to an audiobook.

Maki: And you don't process any of it.

Kaito: Well, of course not, I'm thinking about something someone said to me three years ago.

Source: unknown

—

Rantaro: Are you implying that I occasionally stray from the rule book?

Kiyo: I'm implying that you do not possess a rule book. And if you do, you certainly have never opened it.

Source: artemis fowl

—

Gonta: Great! Barbed wire and a locked fence! How're we supposed to get in?!

Kiibo: Throw Ryoma.

Ryoma: The next person to touch me gets bitten.

Kiibo: Don't throw Ryoma.

Source: tumblr

—

Maki: If I die, I want you to have all my books.

Kaede, tearing up: That's the most romantic thing anyone's ever said to me.

Kaede: Don't die, though…

Source: tumblr

—

Kokichi: Do you think different laundry detergents have different tastes?

Shuichi: They do.

Kiyo: Why did you say that so quickly and with so much certainty?

Source: twitter

—

Himiko, t-posing in the hallway: Good morning, parental figure!

Miu, not looking up from her book: Good morning, star child.

Source: unknown

—

@kagazuly look I scheduled this for nine in the morning where you are so you'll get to see it whenever you get up. Hope you got some rest! Also holy hell I managed to include all sixteen students in a single post.

#kokichi ouma #shuichi saihara #kaito momota #funny #beta au #miu iruma #tsumugi shirogane #kirumi tojo #korekiyo shinguji #angie yonaga #kaemaki #maki Harukawa #kaede Akamatsu #gonta Gokuhara #tenko Chabashira #Himiko yumeno #ryoma hoshi #kiibo #Rantaro amami #nicky makes a quotey #if this needs tw tags just let me know #full drv3 cast #beta au iq