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#source: that 70's show
Dazai : C'mon chuuya, I never asked for anything.
Chuuya : You ask me everything.
Dazai : So, what's one more thing ?
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altumvidetur · 1 year
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Ed: You know what your problem is? You're really cute, so no one ever told you to shut your pie hole. Ling: *bats eyelashes* You think I'm cute? Ed: Ed: Shut your pie hole.
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Conversation
Gintoki: I fantasize with the day Takasugi and I get along.
Takasugi: Don't put me in your fantasies.
Takasugi: I don't even like being in your real life.
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incorrectjag · 28 days
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Admiral Chegwidden: You know I love the JAG Team.
Admiral Chegwidden: But sometimes I just want to get in the car and run them all over.
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Viktor: Do you think we're a creepy, unnatural couple?
Mordecai: Come on. That's a crazy question. I mean, if this relationship isn't a little bit creepy and unnatural, I wouldn't be in it.
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Conversation
Doris: Bart, do you think I'm smart?
Bart: Oh, is that what we're gonna do today, we're gonna fight?
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slashingdisneypasta · 11 months
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Incorrect Quote
Jennifer: Okay, your first mistake was wearing pants for car-sex.
Jennifer: When you do it in a car, skirts are your best friend.
Jennifer: Zip-Zap, Bim-Bam, you're done, you're dressed, you're back at the mall.
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bbu-fan-blog · 2 years
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Lily: Why does Fantoccio always levitate above everyone?
Billie: He likes to be tall.
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weirdkev27 · 2 years
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*Olivia and Felicia have been drinking Juice*
Olivia: You know, Yunan might get on my nerves, but she has the tightest WAP I ever felt.
Felicia: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....I’m sorry, what?
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Kovit: I miss Fabricio. Nita: Well, you still have me. Kovit: It's not the same. I can talk to Fabricio about things that I can't talk to you about. Nita: Like what? Kovit: The annoying things that you do.
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Chuuya putting his hand over dazai's eyes : guess who !
Dazai : it's either chuuya or the cold clammy hand of death .
Chuuya : it's me !
Dazai : damnit.
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elianamarie-blog · 18 days
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The Things You Give Pt. 34
We're almost to the end!! I'm so excited to share this chapter with you and all I've got to say is...muahahahaha!
I also want to apologize for the lack of posting on here. I've lost motivation these last year. We've gone through a lot personally but I really want to finish this and boy and boy am I glad I did! The motivation came back today as I put on That 70's Show and it feels soooo good! I'm probably going to let out a few more chapters at most because this story has gotten a lot longer than it was supposed to. But I hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think <3
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Y/n was panting and struggling to breathe properly as the contractions came on.
“Oh, my God. What should we do?” Jackie asked, almost panicking.
“We need to get her to the hospital!” Markus cried out and turned towards the stairs, suspecting that’s where Kitty or Red may be. “Mr. and Mrs. Forman?! We could really use your help!” A beat passed and he turned to his girlfriend. “Go find one of them. Now. And tell them Y/n is in labor.”
Jackie nodded and ran into the kitchen, calling for Kitty and Red.
Markus whipped back to Y/n who was struggling to breathe from the pain. “Y/n, breathe. It’s going to be okay.”
“I…want…Steven!” Y/n panted as she could barley form words.
“Here, hold on to my han—AAHHH!” Markus screamed as Y/n crushed his hand with hers. “Thank God we’re going to the hospital, right?” He chuckled through the pain. “Jackie! Where are you?!”
“Here!” she called, walking out from the kitchen with Kitty in tow.
“Y/n, honey, what’s going on?” Kitty asked, concerned.
“Her water broke and the contractions are already starting,” Markus explained as calmly as he could.
“Oh, my God, the babies are coming—Red!” Kitty called excitedly. “It’s time!”
“What?” Red asked as he stomped down the stairs, annoyed. “What are you yelling—Y/n, are you okay?”
“Red, she’s in labor!” Kitty explained. “Everyone, get in the car!”
“I’ll stay here and call Steven,” Jackie offered.
“Number to the venue is on the—” Y/n was cut off as another contraction hit her. “Counter,” she strained.
“No, no, no you’re not staying here with your boyfriend,” Red said. “I barley trust you kids in my house when my kids are home; I definitely don’t trust you by yourselves.”
“Don’t worry, Mr. Forman. I’m not staying. I’m going to go to the venue and see if I can catch them,” Markus said.
“How do I know you’re not just saying that?” Red asked, skeptically.
At that moment, Y/n led out a frustrated and pained scream. “Can we finish this conversation later?!”
“She’s right. Let’s go, Red,” Kitty said, grabbing Y/n’s arm and gently guided her out the door.
“I’ll go call Steven. Markus, go to the venue,” Jackie ordered.
“Aye, aye, Captain Hottie,” he smirked before grabbing his keys and walked out.
                                                        ---
“Okay, Y/n breathe,” Kitty instructed as Red drove like a madman to the hospital.
Y/n was doing deep breaths to try and steady the pain. “This is a big one!”
“I know, but you can do it!” Kitty encouraged.
“Is Steven going to make it?” she asked through breaths.
“Oh, I’m sure he is,” Kitty assured. “Jackie is on it. Remember what she did at the wedding?”
Y/n nodded as the pain finally started to subside. “Yeah, she was awesome.” A beat passed before she spoke up again. “Don’t tell her I said that.” Pulsating pain came on as her stomach felt rock hard. “Here comes another one.”
“We’re almost there, honey,” Kitty said, rubbing her shoulder. “Red, step on it!”
                                               Meanwhile…
Loud rock music filled the air at the venue as the group jammed out from the crowd.
“This is the greatest day of my life!” Kelso shouted at his friends.
“Agreed!” Donna replied as Immigrant Song started.
“Hell yeah!” Eric whooped as he lit up a lighter.  
“Play that funky music white boys!” Fez shouted excitedly.
Everyone was having the greatest time, except for Hyde. He would occasionally whoop and holler, but the thought of Y/n being home while he was out having fun didn't sit right with him. It wasn’t until the song ended and the band moved onto the next that he nudged Fez, getting his attention.
“Hey, man, I’ll be right back.”
“Sure!” Fez said, barley paying attention.
Hyde rolled his eyes at his friend before leaving the arena and walking to the recession stand.
“Hi, how can I help you?” the young blonde woman asked as he approached her.
“Can I use your phone?”
“Absolutely,” she chirped and brought the phone out from beside the register. “Just dial 9 first.”
“Thanks,” he muttered and dialed the house number. It rang three times before someone picked up.
“Hello? Steven?”
“Jackie?” Hyde asked, scrunching his face. “What’re you doing at the house? Where’s Y/n?”
“Markus and I came over to be with Y/n to keep her company while you guys were gone,” she explained.
“Oh. Well, where is she? I want to talk to her.”
“Yeah…sorry, you can’t.”
“What? Why?”
“Because she isn’t here,” she replied.
Steven sighed, starting to feel irritated. “Where is she then?”
“At the hospital.”
“What?!” he almost yelled. “Why didn’t you lead with that? Is she in labor?!”
“Yes, she’s on the way. I stayed behind in case you called. If you leave now you might be able to meet her there.”
The phone almost slipped out his hand. “Oh, my God…”
“Steven…are you okay?”
“I’m on my way. Tell her to try to not have the babies until I get there!” He hung up the phone before she could answer and ran back into the arena where his friends were.
“Hey, man, where’d you go?” Eric asked while keeping his eye on the band.
“Y/n’s in labor!” Steven shouted.
Eric snapped his head towards his friend with wide eyes. “WHAT?!”
“Yeah, man, we gotta go!”
“Yeah, okay,” Eric said, nodding frantically and turned to Donna. “We gotta go!”
“What? Why?” she asked, smiling and hooting.
“Because Y/n is in labor!”
Her smile quickly disappeared as her attention snapped from the band to her boyfriend and friend. “WHAT?!”
“We’ve gotta go! She’s on her way to the hospital right now!” Hyde said.
“Right, okay,” Donna said, almost in a panic and turned to the boys. “Guys, Y/n’s in labor!”
“What?” Kelso shouted back. “Y/n’s the neighbor?”
“No, you dunce! Y/n’s in labor!” she repeated.
“Y/n’s the greater?” Kelso asked, even more confused. “Speak English, Donna, you’re not making any sense.”
“Y/N IS IN LABOR, YOU FOOL!” Fez screamed.
“Oh, my God!” Kelso shouted.
“Yeah, so we need to go,” Donna responded and grabbed him by the elbow.
“Wait, we’re all gonna go?” he questioned and dug his heels into the ground. “What about the concert?”
“Forget the concert, man, my wife is in labor!”
“Why? She’s not my wife,” Kelso argued.
Hyde’s jaw clenched and his fists balled up, dying to hit Kelso. “You know what? I don’t have time for this. If you want to stay, fine, but I’m leaving your ass here and you can find a ride home.”
Kelso laughed. “You’re not going to do that.”
“You wanna bet?”
“But they’re in the middle of a song!” he whined.
“You wanna walk home?” Hyde threatened.
Kelso groaned before stomping his foot. “Fine!”
                                                        ∞∞∞
“Alright, Mrs. Hyde,” Dr. Lee said, pulling back the privacy curtain as Y/n laid in the hospital bed. “You’re dilated two centimeters. Now this is your first childbirth so you could be here a while. We’ll keep monitoring you.”
“Thank you, Doctor,” Y/n said. “Can I have something to drink?”
“Just ice chips,” the doctor said with a sympathetic smile.
“Okay,” she sighed, disappointed.
“I’ll be back in a little while to check on you,” she said and exited the room.
“Well, this could take a while,” Kitty said and started fluffing Y/n’s pillow. “Did you want some ice chips?”
“That would be nice,” Y/n responded. “Thank you.”
“Of course. Red stay here with her while I go get her ice chips.”
“Where else am I gonna go?” Red asked with a shrug of his shoulders. Once Kitty left the room, it was silent.
“So,” Red said, breaking the silence and sighed awkwardly. “Do the contractions really hurt as much as they say?”
Y/n stared up at her father with a confused and bewildered look. “I don’t know. Have someone kick your boys multiple times and harder each time and then come back and tell me.”
Red couldn’t help but chuckle. After another minute of silence, Y/n spoke up.
“Dad?”
“Mhm?”
“Were you scared when Mom went into labor?”
A small smile graced his lips and he nodded. “Yeah, I was. But let me tell you the moment I held you and your brother in my arms, that fear melted away.”
“So, the minute I hold my children, my fears are going to melt away forever?”
“Oh, hell no,” Red chuckled, shaking his head. “The fear never goes away. Everyday a new fear will strike in you and you’re going to have to find some way to battle that one among the others. It’s a never ending cycle.”
“Oh my God…how do you sleep at night?”
“I just close my eyes,” he quips and rocks on his heels. “But your mother…not so much. She worries for you guys constantly.”
Y/n looked down at her hands. “I didn’t know that.”
“Of course you didn’t. The last thing she wants is to make you guys worry because all she wants is for you to worry about yourselves.”
“But that’s not how that works,” she argued. “We’re a family we do that for each other.”
“Not in a parent’s eyes,” he responded cooly and started heading out the door. “I’m going to call your idiot brother and see if he’s at the house.”
Y/n nodded at him as he walked out the door. As soon as the door clicked shut, another contraction shot through her, catching her breath in her throat. She breathed through the pain, and what felt like minutes but only seconds, it subsided as soon as Kitty walked back through the door.
“Here you go, dear,” Kitty said.
“Thanks, Mom,” Y/n replied breathlessly as her head fell back against the pillow.
                                                --Meanwhile--
“Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, COME ON!” Hyde shouted as he dodged traffic and weaved through traffic like a madman.
“Hyde, slow down!” Eric tried to hide his panic as he white knuckled the door handle and middle console. “I know we’re going to the hospital anyway, but let’s try to get there alive!”
“Have you guys ever noticed people in this town drive so damn SLOW?!” He honked his horn impatiently. “Move over, Grandma!”
“Hyde, please, I don’t want to die,” Fez whined from the back as he clutched the back door and Kelso’s arm.
“Shut up, Fez,” Hyde snapped as he desperately hit the gas more. “DAMN IT!” he shouted when he hit a red light.
“Hyde, man, it’s alright. You’re going to make it in time,” Eric said, trying to calm him down.
“No, Forman, it’s not going to be alright if I’m not there!” he raised his voice and punched the gas as soon as the light turned green.
“Don’t worry, you’re going to make it,” Donna said.
“No, you guys don’t get it,” Hyde replied, forcing himself to stay calm. “My dad wasn’t there when I was born and I’ll be damned if I do the same to my kids.”
“You’re not your dad, man…” Kelso said quietly.
“You’re right I’m not,” Hyde responded, staring intently at the road. “I’m going to be better.”
“And you are, but you need to—RED LIGHT!” Eric shouted as Hyde sped through.
“Relax, it’s not like we hit anybody,” Hyde said, hard gaze on the road.
“Um, Hyde?” Fez piped up, looking out the back window nervously.
“You’re going to kill us!” Eric screeched.
“No, I’m not!”
“Hyde?” Fez said again, this time a little louder.
“It’s going to be no use if we don’t make it alive!” Eric shouted.
“Will you lay off?!” Hyde shouted back, white knuckling the steering wheel. “We’re going to be fine.”
“HYDE!” Fez shouted sharply.
“What?!” Hyde snapped.
“Um…” he responded by pointing out the back window.
Hyde followed his line of sight and saw blue and red flashing behind them. “Crap.”
                                                --Time Skip—
Y/n was doing deep breathing exercises as another contraction waved through her. At this point, sweat had formed on her hairline while her hair had been pulled back into a messy ponytail by Kitty.  
The pain radiated through her back down to her legs as she felt like daggers were racing through her bloodstream.
“Just keep breathing, honey, you’re doing great!” Kitty encouraged as Y/n struggled to keep breathing. She held her daughter’s hand as Y/n squeezed it through the pain.
“It...hurts…!” she whined as she breathed through the pain.
“I know, honey, but it’s going to be so worth it when you get to hold your babies for the first time,” Kitty cooed.
Finally, the contraction ended and Y/n laid her head back in exhaustion, panting. “Has anyone heard from Steven?”
“When I called the house, your little loud friend answered and said she had spoken to him and he was on the way,” Red answered and checked his watch. “But then again, that was almost two and half hours ago.”
“The concert was only forty-five minutes away,” Y/n pointed out. “An hour and a half at most with traffic.” She was silent for a moment, fighting back tears. “I knew he cared more about the stupid concert than me.”
“Oh, honey, you know that’s not true,” Kitty said, rubbing her daughter’s covered leg in comfort.
“No, it is, otherwise he would be here!” she wailed, tears running down her face. “I’m about to push two babies out of me and he’s not here! I’ve never been in so much pain in my entire life and I just want my husband!”
“I know, sweetie, I know, but he’ll be here,” Kitty reassured and walked over to her husband. “Can I talk to you outside?”
“About what?” he asked.
“Just get outside,” she responded and pushed him out. After she shut the door, she turned back to him. “You need to find him.”
“Why? I’m sure he’s on the way,” Red said casually and walked over to the nearest coffee station.
“The last time a big event happened, Steven almost didn’t make it!” she said harshly. “He was in jail, Red, jail!”
“What do you want me to do about it?”
“Go back to the house and find him!”
“Kitty, if he’s not here, he’s not going to be at the house,” he pointed out, pouring himself a cup of coffee.
“What if he stopped by the house?”
“Now, why would he do that?”
“I don’t know, why did the boy go to a concert when he knows his wife’s about to pop? We’ll never know why the kids do what they do, but what I know for sure is that something is wrong!”
“Oh, Kitty, come on!” Red whined. “I’m sure Steven is fine. He’s probably stuck in traffic or something.”
                                       --Scene Transition—
“Officer, I’m telling you, I’m not drunk!” Hyde yelled.
The scene in front of him would’ve been quite comedic if he hadn’t been the one in the position. He was leaned forward on the hood with his hands splayed out and legs spread as he was being searched.
“With the way you were driving, I beg to differ,” the officer replied as he carefully searched Hyde.
“The breathalyzer said I wasn’t!” he argued. “Why are you still searching me? I need to get to the hospital! My wife is in labor!”
“Yeah, I haven’t heard that one before,” the cop scoffed as he stood.
“Man, I’m serious! If you follow me, I’ll show you I’m telling the truth!”
“I’m not falling for that one again.”
“What? No, man, I’m serious!”
“You know everything you say can and will be held against you in the court of law,” the officer said.
“Okay, well then get this on record: I. NEED. TO. GET. TO. MY. WIFE. She is in labor and I really need to be there!”
“Shut up or else I will arrest you.”
Steven sighed, frustrated. “For God’s sake.”
While this was happening, the rest of the crew sat silently and rigid in the car. They felt with one wrong move, they would be arrested.
“Do you think he’s going to be let go?” Fez asked.
“If he shuts up and lets the man do his job, the maybe,” Kelso said.
“Hey, wait, you used to be a cop,” Eric pointed out. “Can’t you do something?”
“I doubt it,” Kelso responded, not taking his eyes off the cop. “As long as Hyde shuts up, he should be fine.”
“I hope you’re right. It would be awful if he missed the birth of his children like how he almost his own wedding,” Donna said, staring at Hyde as he stood still as a statue.
“Yeah, that would be,” Kelso mumbled.
Meanwhile outside, Hyde was ready to jump out of skin as he waited for the cop to finish up the report. The cop purposely was taking his time which made Hyde want to twist his neck even more.
“Can I go now?” he asked.
“I need to still check the car.”
“You checked it twice!”
“Once more never killed anybody.”
“Come on!” Hyde shouted as he watched the cop reach into the glove compartment to grab some gloves. “I’ve done everything you asked and you’re still going to hold me here? What more do you want?”
“I just love watching people like you squirm,” the cop said smugly as he snapped on the latex gloves.
“People like me? Man, I’m telling the truth!” Hyde shouted. “I’m not drunk and I’m not high! There’s nothing in my car! I don’t know what the hell you’re looking for, but you’re not going to find it!”
The cop smirked. “We’ll see about that.”
A car rumbled by across the street before it stopped and parked. Steven eyed the cop as he watched him kick his friends out and search the car again.
“Steven?!”
Hyde’s head snapped to the sound of his name and watched as Red crossed the street towards him.
“Red?” Hyde called out. “What’re you doing here?”
“What am I doing here? What are you doing here?!” Red asked, now feeling frustrated. “Do you know Kitty made me leave the hospital to drive back home to find you, only to find out that you’ve been pulled over the side of the road?!” He stood directly in front of Steven as he also watched the cop search the car. “Why were you pulled over this time?”
“Speeding.”
“And he’s searching the car because...?”
“He’s sure I’m under the influence of drugs or alcohol.”
Red pinched his eyebrows together and looked at Steven. “Were you breathalyzed?”
“Yes.”
“And searched?”
“Three times.”
“You don’t got that dope on you, do you?”
Steven rubbed his forehead, trying to control his irritation. “No.”
“Then why are you still here?!”
“That’s a good question. Ask the man in blue.”
Without hesitation, Red darted towards the police officer. “Hey, buddy! What the hell are you doing?!”
“Sir, I’m going to need you to back up while I conduct my search—”
“To hell with your damn search!” Red yelled. “You found nothing, now let him go! His wife, my daughter, is at the hospital about to give birth!”
“Oh, now he’s got you covering him?” the cops asked smugly. “I’m not buying it and this can be held against you—”
“Do I need to call Chief Calvin?” Red interrupted with fire in his eyes. “Do I need to tell him that you are looking to book my son-in-law?”
“How do you know—?”
“I’ve got
“You can if you want,” the cop said. “I’m just doing my job.”
“No, you’re not. You’re being a prick who is on a power trip. I’ll tell you what, you give him the speeding ticket and I won’t report your ass to the chief for trying to find false evidence.”
An annoyed, angry look crossed over the officer’s face before he snapped off his gloves. “Fine.”
“Thank you, officer,” Red said sickly sweet.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he mumbled as he walked back to the cop car.
Once the officer was out of earshot, Hyde turned to Red. “You really know that Chief like that?”
“Please,” he scoffed. “I had you and my son to deal with. You didn’t think I wasn’t going to get to be on a first name basis with the P.D?”
                                             --Meanwhile—
“WHERE. IS. HE?!” Y/n screamed through contractions.
“I don’t know, sweetie. Your dad is out looking for him,” Kitty responded, wiping away sweat off her daughter’s forehead.
This caused Y/n to scream out more in frustration than in pain when another contraction hit. “SON OF A BITCH!”
A knock on the door barley made their attention when Dr. Lee popped in. “How are we doing?”
“I need drugs!” Y/n screamed.
“Let me see how dilated you are,” Dr. Lee responded and popped on some gloves. After she felt around, she came up from between Y/n’s legs and sighed contently. “4 centimeters—looks like you’re dilated enough.”
“Oh, thank God,” Y/n sighed and leaned her head back.
“You know, you do qualify for this new drug we have. It’s called an epidural anesthesia. It’s going to numb you from the waist down and you won’t be able to feel anything.”
“Do it.”
“You don’t want to hear the possible side--"
"Damn it, woman, do it!" Y/n cried out in discomfort. “It feels like these kids are going to rip me in half!”
Dr. Lee chuckled before nodding. “I’ll be right back with the anesthesiologist.”
“Wow, fancy,” Kitty said, impressed. “When I gave birth to all three of you, I didn’t get that special treatment.”
“Times have changed, Mom,” Y/n responded dully.
“Excuse me, miss grumpy pants,” Kitty sassed as she situated herself in the chair next to the bed.
“Sorry,” Y/n mumbled and stared at the ceiling in silence.
“He’ll make it,” Kitty said after a minute.
“I appreciate the sentiment, but I don’t know right now. He was arrested and almost didn’t make it to our wedding, so I’m not sure if he’ll make it here on time to witness the birth of his children.”
“Oh, Dear, that’s just the hormones talking. I know Steven is just anxious to be here.”
                                          --Meanwhile—
“For the love of GOD, people, move your asses!” Hyde yelled at the traffic ahead of him. “Why is it even this crowded? Where are all these people coming from?!”
“Um, probably from the concert,” Donna piped up.
“The whole town went to the concert?!”
“I mean, we’re not the only ones who listen to them, but whatever,” Eric mumbled.
Hyde ignored them as another growl bubbled up from his throat as traffic began to slow down again. “Friggin’ slow asses, move!” He honked his horn and swerved in the other lane to pass someone.
“That was a student driver,” Eric said.
“Yeah, and I felt the same way when I passed that old lady earlier—nothing,” Hyde retorted as he got off the highway. “Doesn’t matter anyway, we’re almost there.”
“Pretty sure at this rate we’ll be there in five minutes instead of twenty,” Fez said nervously, gripping the door handle with white knuckles.
“Yeah, I think I felt safer when we were pulled over,” Kelso said and quickly averted Hyde’s icy glare through the rearview mirror. “I’ll shut up now.”
“Good plan,” Hyde responded. “Now, hang onto your asses. This is going to be a fast ride.”
                                           --At the hospital—
“Hey, Mom, look,” Y/n said, calm and happy and pointed at the machine that was monitoring her contractions. “I’m having a contraction. Who knew?”
“Are you feeling better now that you got the epidural?” Kitty asked, relieved to see her daughter out of pain.
Y/n giggled. “It’s almost like—childbirth, who? Pushing out two babies, say what?”
Kitty smiled. “Glad to hear it, dear.”
“Alright, Mrs. Hyde, after checking your dilation, it looks like you’re now at eight centimeters,” Dr. Lee informed.
“Whoa, man, I’m so numb I didn’t even feel you down there,” Y/n chuckled.
“Y/n, honey, did you hear the doctor?” Kitty asked, grabbing her daughter’s hand. “You’re eight centimeters. There’s only two centimeters left until you need to start pushing.”
Y/n’s eyes bugged out at the sudden realization. “What?! But-but Steven isn’t here yet!”
“Unfortunately, that doesn’t matter to babies coming out of a womb,” Kitty explained gently.
“No, no, no they have to stay in there until he’s here!” Y/n panicked. “Damn it, I knew he shouldn’t have gone!”
 Dr. Lee took this as her cue to leave. “I’ll be back later to check on you.”
After Dr. Lee left, Y/n turned to Kitty with tears in her eyes. “Mom, I can’t do this alone.”
“Oh, honey, you’re not going to be alone. I’ll be here.”
“You promise?”
Kitty smoothed down her daughter’s sweaty, matted hair. “Of course. I love you.”
“I love you, too.” She wrapped her arms around her mother as she felt an ounce of comfort. When she pulled away, she looked her in the eyes. “Just…don’t look at me. You know, down there.”
“Honey, I’m a nurse. I see this on a daily basis!” Kitty laughed. “And not to mention you, too, came out of me!”
“Ugh, God, MOM!”
                                                  Now…
“Finally! Land!” Eric bellowed as he stumbled out of the now parked car with wobbly legs. “Thank you, God, we’re alive!” He clutched his chest, breathing heavily, and looked up at the sky. “God, I know you and I don’t talk a lot, but thank you for not killing us.”
“Forman, get off the ground,” Hyde ordered. “You’re embarrassing me.”
“I’m just…so happy,” Eric whined, but kept his hand on his chest.
“Come on, hurry!” Red barked. “Those babies aren’t going to wait much longer for them to be born!”
“You’re right,” Hyde said and clapped a hand onto Red’s shoulder. “I’m gonna go have my babies!”
He heard the cheers coming from his friends behind him as he ran into the hospital, heart pounding from the adrenaline.
Eric turned to Donna after they watched their friend disappear into the hospital. “Hey, Donna?”
“Yeah, Eric?”
“Which arm hurts when you’re having a heart attack?”
“Your left one.”
“Oh,” he sighed and cracked a nervous smile. “It’s a good thing we’re at a hospital, huh?”
                                  --Five minutes later—
“Alright, Mrs. Hyde, looks like you’re at ten centimeters,” Dr. Lee said., situating herself between Y/n's legs that were up in the stirrups. “It’s time to start pushing. Are you feeling any pain?”
Y/n shook her head nervously. “Just a lot of pressure.”
“Good. Are you ready?”
Y/n grabbed her mother’s hand as Kitty helped her sit up. “You got this, honey.”
“And…push!” the doctor said, but was quickly interrupted as the door swung open, startling her.
“I’m here! I’m so sorry, but I’m here!” Steven said, out of breath.
“Steven, you’re here!” Y/n said, relief flooding over her, which soon was quickly replaced with anger. “Where the HELL have you been?!”
“I’m so sorry, Doll,” he said and kissed her forehead. “It’s a long story, but traffic was horrible and then I got pulled over until Red found me—”
“What?!” Y/n shouted.
“Mr. Hyde, I’m so glad that you’re able to join us, but Mrs. Hyde is going to have to start pushing now,” said Dr. Lee.
“Oh, my God,” Hyde said nervously and slipped his hand into his wife’s. “You got this, baby.”
“Since you’re here, I’ll let myself out,” Kitty said.
“Wait, no, Mom,” Y/n called out, stopping her. “Y-you don’t have to go. You can stay here if you want.”
Kitty gave her a gentle smile and kissed her cheek. “Sweet girl. It’s okay, you don’t need me.”
“I’ll always need you,” her voice cracked and eyes filled with tears. “Mommy, I’m scared.”
“You’ll be just fine. In a moment like this, you need your husband, not your mother, who I am so glad is finally here. I’ll be right outside, okay?”
Y/n nodded and wiped at her eyes. “Okay.”
“Okay. Besides, I need to talk to your father and see what happened with Steven getting pulled over.” She blew a kiss to her daughter and son-in-law as she walked out the room.
“Alright, Mrs. Hyde, I need you to push for me like you’re using the toilet. Can you do that for me?”
Y/n sat herself up while still gripping onto Steven’s hand and pushed as hard as she could.
“Good job! I’m seeing a head!” the doctor announced.
“Come on, baby, you got this!” Hyde encouraged.
“Okay, now stop,” Dr. Lee ordered. “Breathe, take a ten second break. We’re going to do this slowly. We don’t want any tears.”
Y/n nodded once again and leaned back. She looked up to her husband who was staring down on her lovingly. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Me too,” he responded. “I’m sorry I’m late.”
She caressed his face. “You’re here now. That’s all that matters.”
“Let’s start pushing again,” Dr. Lee said and placed her hands on Elena’s knees. “And…go!”
Elena sat up with Hyde’s help and started pushing again. Grunting, she felt pressure building up even more as if she really was using the toilet. “Oh, my God!”
“You’re doing it! Good girl!” the doctor encouraged.
“Breathe, baby doll, breathe,” Hyde said gently as he moved hair out of her face.
She let out long breaths to ease the pressure, but it wasn’t helping much.
“Oh, my God, my ass is going to explode!” she screamed.
“No, it’s not, you’re doing so well!” Hyde encouraged.
“Dad, I’m going to need you to hold her leg up for me,” instructed the doctor.
Without a word, Hyde reached down and placed a gentle under her knee, lifting it upwards.
“Much better,” said Dr. Lee. “You’re doing well, Y/n! Just keep pushing!”
Y/n squeezed Hyde’s hand so hard he swore she was going to cut off his fingers, but he didn’t care and in fact, almost completely forgot about it when he heard the doctor yell, “Baby number one’s head is out! Now, Y/n, I’m going to need you to give me one big push for the shoulders, okay?”
Y/n nodded, breathing heavily and leaned against her husband.
“You got this,” Hyde said in her ear as he supported her back.
She grunted and groaned as she pushed as hard as she could.
“Push, baby, push!” Hyde said, almost excitedly.
“Almost there!” Dr. Lee announced.
Y/n took in a deep breath before doing the biggest push she could muster.
“Shoulders are out!” said the doctor before she gently pulled the baby out.
                           And then, there was crying.
“Congratulations, it’s a boy!” announced the doctor.
“Oh, my God!” Y/n cried as she saw her son for the first time.
“It’s a boy,” Hyde said breathlessly. It took everything in him not to allow any tears surface.
“We have a boy, Steven,” Y/n wept as she watched the nurse take him from the doctor. “Where’d he go?”
“They’re just taking him to get him cleaned up,” Steven said, his eyes watery.
“He’s so tiny,” she whispered and looked up at Steven.
“He’s perfect,” he responded and kissed her gently.
“Y/n, it looks like baby number two is ready to come out,” Dr. Lee said.
“Ugh, I already had a baby. Leave me alone,” Y/n groaned. “Can’t I take a break?”
“Sorry, not with this little one. They’re coming sooner than you think!” answered the doctor and sat between her legs again. “Ready?”
“Not really…”
“Good, because they’re coming!”
Y/n didn’t get a chance to even breathe before she felt a tremendous amount of pressure passing through her. She gasped before grabbing onto Hyde’s neck and digging her nails into his flesh.
“Ow, ow, ow, Y/n, ow!”
“So-sorry,” she stuttered, breathless and let go.
“Here, grab my hand instead,” he said, offering his hand.
She grabbed his hand again and squeezed.
“Alright, Mr. Hyde, just like last time, go ahead and grab Mom’s leg and hold it up for me,” Dr. Lee instructed again.
He repeated the motion from before and gently lifted her leg up.
“Perfect,” Dr. Lee said, encouragingly. “Annnnd push!”
One more deep breathe and Y/n pushed harder than she had pushed before.
“Wait, wait, wait, stop pushing,” the doctor said suddenly.
“What, why?!” Y/n asked, panting.
Hyde step forward to take a look. “Oh, God! What the hell is that?!”
“Don’t say that! What is what?!” Y/n screeched.
“It’s the baby’s feet. They’re breeched,” the doctor said.  
“Oh, my God. Are they going to be okay?!” Y/n asked, panicking.
“They’re going to be fine. But I’m going to need you to push even harder now.”
“No, I can’t! I can’t do this anymore.”
“Yes, you can,” Hyde said. “You’re stronger than you know. You always have been. You can do this, Y/n”
“No, no I can’t!” She turned back to the doctor. “Can’t you just reach up there and pull the baby out?!”
“Not unless you want a C-section, you’re going to need to do this,” said Dr. Lee.
Y/n leaned back, crying. “I can’t—I don’t have it in me!”
“Hey, hey, look at me,” Steven said, gently. She looked at her husband, teary eyed. “Just think—this baby will be out and then it’ll be over. You just gotta get through this, okay? You can bring our son or daughter and this will be over. Okay? I love you so much, you can do this.”
“I love you, too,” she whimpered and sat up.
“Push like you haven’t pooped in a week,” Dr. Lee instructed gently.
“It feels like I haven’t!” Y/n screamed as she felt the pressure rise.
“There we go!” the doctor said excitedly. “Both feet are out! Here come the legs!”
“You’re doing amazing, doll, keep going!” Hyde encouraged.
Y/n took another breath before pushing the hardest she could. She started to feel some relief from the pressure the more she pushed.
“Here she comes!” Dr. Lee announced.
Hyde’s gaze snapped to the doctor. “It’s a girl?!”
Dr. Lee looked back at him with a soft gaze and a smile. "Yeah, it's a girl."
“Oh, my God,” Hyde said, this time his voice cracking from emotion. “Baby, we have a daughter."
"One of each," Y/n choked back a sob.
"Give me one last big push!” said the doctor.
With a final push, the pressure finally alleviated and soon, the sound of a crying baby filled the room.
“Here she is!” the doctor held up the baby as she continued to cry.
“She’s beautiful,” Y/n said in awe, feeling emotional. She wept as she watched her daughter being taken away for cleanup.
“Just like her mom,” Hyde said teary eyed and looked at his wife. “You did great, Doll. I’m so proud of you.”
The adrenaline that was once pumping through Y/n’s veins was now fading and she could now start to feel the exhaustion take over. “I couldn’t have done this without you.” She reached a hand up and gently wiped a stray tear.
He leaned down and gave her a gentle, passionate kiss.
“Good job, Mom and Dad,” Dr. Lee said with a smile. “Mrs. Hyde, we’re just going to stitch you up—”
“Steven…” Y/n whimpered, her eyelids getting heavier. “’M tired. S’ tired.”
“Uh, doc? Is she supposed to be feeling this tired? She can’t keep her eyes opened—”
The heart rate monitors suddenly start screaming.
“Someone get the babies out of here!” Dr. Lee ordered. “Mr. Hyde, I’m going to need you to step out the room.”
“What’s going on?!” Hyde demanded and looked down to Y/n who was barley conscious.
“She’s hemorrhaging and it’s causing her blood pressure to drop. She’s going into shock.”
“What?!” Steven shouted as he started to be pushed out. “Wait! Wait! Y/n!”
Everything happened so fast, the last thing Hyde saw was his wife being surrounded by nurses and doctors as he was shoved out the room, and the door slammed in his face.
Taglist: @not-shy-nanya @taysirene @maddieschampagneproblems @mdittyz123 @undead-sierra @random-thoughts-004 @lieswithoutfairytales @chloem4a1 @srhxpc @zhonglibxitch @leothesquishy
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wambsroy · 2 months
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Persephone: it’s cold
Hades: *takes off his jacket* here darling
Persephone: i love you.
Hera: i’m cold too
Zeus: well, damn, hera! i can’t control the weather
Hera: ACTUALLY YOU CAN
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incorrectjag · 6 months
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Rene: I’m cold.
Harm: Here, take my jacket.
Mac: I’m cold, too.
Mic: Well damn, Sarah! I can’t control the weather.          
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sheriffhaughtearp · 1 year
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Wynonna: Nicole. Don’t hate me ‘cause I’m beautiful.
Nicole: Wynonna, I pity you because you’re dumb.
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greenpidge101 · 1 year
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Ben: Why is Eddie on the counter?
Mike: He likes to be tall.
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