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<div> —  Narcissa Malfoy </div><span>I’d trade you all for a tic-tac</span>
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Conversation
Nom Nom
Anything you say in the next 30 seconds is free starting right now.
Panda
I think you’re cocky, arrogant, bossy, and pushy. You also have a god complex and don’t think of anybody but yourself.
Nom Nom
But-
Panda
But what? I still have 22 seconds and I'm not done.
30 notes
Conversation
Homestar
It's nevuh too late! I'm Homestaw Wunner and I nevuh say 'nevuh'!
Strong Bad
You just said it three times.
17 notes

Flag of Empire of Brunei Burneian Sultanate (1368-1888) Source: Wikipedia

from /r/vexillology

Top comment: I love the detail on this flag.
Post
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Conversation
Grizzly
I don't always make the best decisions under pressure.
Panda
What the hell is that?
Grizzly
An alpaca! I got the last one.
30 notes
Conversation
Strong Sad
My favorite thing to do is tell my friends about the wild things Victor Hugo did and see the look of shock and horror on their faces because they only know him as the great author who wrote Les Mis and Hunchback, and not as the man who gave his fianceé a live bat in an envelope.
Marzipan
...He what now?
13 notes
<div> —  King of Town, probably<br> </div><span>I don’t know who needs to hear this right now, but you can eat lasagna in the shower if you want to. It’s not illegal. They can’t arrest you. Go and be free!</span>
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<div> —  Ice Bear, probably<br> </div><span>Ice Bear is so full of love. And anger. Like a lava lamp.</span>
41 notes

This is a bucket (Squish Version)

Pod: This… is a bucket.

Peggy: Oooh…

Pod: There’s more.

Peggy: [astonished] No!

Pod: [ignoring her] It contains the dying wish of every student here. [turns] Squish. You did collect everyone’s dying wish?

Squish: Oh, you bet!

Pod: Excellent. Now, fellow students, synchronize your death watches.

[Cut to a close-up of the watch. Red embossing tape declares it a “DEATH CLOCK”. The display beeps as the various students set their watches. It reads 70:00:00. 70 hours left to live and counting. Taps-like trumpet-playing is heard.]

Pod: We have seventy hours to live. For most cells, no time at all.

Pod: We are not most cells.

Pod: We are survivors. We have the resources. The will. To make these hours count! [he gestures emphatically with his test tube full of acid, some of it spills and burns through the floor]

Pod: [sudden close-up while the background music cuts off] The clock is ticking, students. Let’s begin.

Pod: Our first dying wish is Squish’s. [he gestures] He’s…

[Pod examines the card. He stares at it very confused.]

Spy: …drawn a picture of me in the lab which is exploding.

[The drawing is somewhat crude. The explosion is drawn in much greater detail than Pod who is running (or however cells move,) Panicking with the word “AAAAAAA” above him]

Pod: [he peers closer] I have something radiating off of me.

Squish: Yeah, that is fire.

[He turns to the rest of the students in a mock whisper.]

Squish: That’s why everything exploded. Cause he’s on fire.

Pod: [rolling his eyes as he draws another card] Yes I see. Here you’ve drawn me…

[The camera tastefully remains on his face.]

Pod: [somewhat bemused] …kissing an electromagnet. [he tosses it and draws another while Squish giggles] The electromagnet kissing me. [toss and giggle] Me and the electromagnet getting married.

[Squish is nearly in tears with laughter.]

Pod: [growing more irritated] I’m crying and the electromagnet is on fire. [he angrily throws the card down] Did anyone besides Squish put a card into the bucket?!

[Squish is near breathless with laughter.]

Squish: [giggling] Oh man, Classic Squish.

Pod: [sighing] Fantastic. This was a huge waste of my time.

Peggy: [pulling out a card] You didn’t read mine!

Pod: [another sigh] Does it say you want the bucket?

Peggy: [interrupting] Yes

1 notes
Conversation
Panda
Weird Al Yankovic implies the existence of a Mundane Al Yankovic.
Tabes
He literally had a roommate in college also named Al, and they called him "Weird Al" to differentiate the two.
Grizzly
So what I'm hearing is, there is a Mundane Al.
43 notes
Conversation
Marzipan
Behind every girlboss is another, bigger girlboss.
Marzipan
They call this a pyramid scheme, I think.
13 notes
Text

top 5 republican mcyts, according to jschlatt:

1. dream

2. jschlatt

3. tommyinnit

4. ???

5. ted cruz

26 notes

one of the greatest screenshots I’ve ever taken

image

he’s dead

40 notes
<div> —  Panda, probably<br> </div><span>Oh, Miki-chan, we’re really in it now.</span>
46 notes
Conversation
Strong Sad
When do you plan to take down the Decemberween tree?
Strong Bad
We don't have a Decemberween tree.
Strong Sad
What are you talking about? It's right there!
Strong Bad
That used to be a Decemberween tree, now it's a President's Day tree.
Strong Sad
If it becomes a Fourth of July tree we have a problem.
14 notes

Jason: Are you trying to seduce me?

Roy: Why, are you seducible? 

106 notes
Conversation
Tabes
Aw cripes, a bunch of the Pigeon Cartel are ghost-riding my Jeep in the parking lot!
Grizzly
When were they hatched, 2005?
28 notes
<div> —  Cheerleader, probably<br> </div><span>I am the sexiest bitch in this therapy waiting room.</span>
14 notes

le soleil coule à travers une prairie de jaunes, d'oranges et de rouges
une fille est assise dans les fleurs et sourit légèrement
elle rêve des nuages ​​duveteux, ils dérivent paresseusement du bout de ses doigts
blanc pur contre les fleurs chaudes et moelleuses

1 notes

Dick: I think you’re still suffering from the effects of your party last night.

Tim: All I drank was Redbull!

Dick: How many?

Tim: Eighteen

94 notes