#source: hellsing ultimate abridged

[blue-rose-soul]

Vox: I'm sure you're wondering why I went through all this. Why I planted a spy in your tacky little hotel, just to kill you?

Alastor: Oh, because you wanna fuck me.

Vox: ...

#incorrect quotes #source: Hellsing Ultimate Abridged #Hazbin Hotel #suggestive #Alastor #Vox #one sided staticradio #Alastor's 120% trolling he has no idea how right he is

[disgracefulthings]

Luo Binghe, whipping out Xin Mo: It's almost as big as my love for you <3

Shen Qingqiu: You mean your erection?

Luo Binghe: That is what I call it, yes

#shen qingqiu: wait #almost?!?! #source: hellsing ultimate abridged #source: team four star #shen qingqiu #shen yuan #luo binghe #mxtx #mxtx svsss #svsss #scum villian self saving system #bingqiu #incorrect quotes

[sunshine-tattoo]

*a phone argument between Al and Vaggie*

Alastor: betcha im right

Vaggie: betcha you're not

Alastor: betcha you're a skank

Vaggie: betcha you're an asshole

Alastor: BITCH I EAT PEOPLE

#source: hellsing ultimate abridged #hazbin hotel #alastor #vaggie #hazbin hotel memes #hazbin hotel shitpost

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

Leo: What did you do?

Raph: Alright, but you can’t get mad at me.

Leo: What did you do?

Raph: Okay, first. I was minding my own business-

Leo: BULLSHIT!

Raph: I was!

Leo: And exactly what happened whilst you were "minding your own business"?

Raph: So I was just chillaxing in my room like a baller, then all of a sudden these shmucks kicked in my door. One of them yelled out "Get on your knees!" and I responded with "I’m not your mother last night!"

Raph: And they took exception to that.

#submission #thank you for the submission <3 #incorrect tmnt quotes #source: hellsing ultimate abridged #tmnt 2012 #tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #leonardo #raphael #swear warning

[hellmersy]

Ghost: I have made a list of my top three undertakings in my life. The third is Hassan, the second is Roba. Can you guess the first?

Soap *without missing a beat*: Your father.

Ghost: Nailed it!

#source: hellsing ultimate abridged #ghostsoap

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

Jane: No Jake, you’re not a Joey. You’re a Chandler trying to be a Joey and it just makes you come off as a Ross.

Jake: Early seasons Ross?

Jane: No, seasons 6 to 9.

#submission #source: hellsing ultimate abridged #this quote is the only thing i know about Friends #that and the futurama bit about ross eating the other five #// #homestuck #incorrect homestuck quotes #jane crocker #jake english #mod terezi #that's more than i know about friends so i'll defer to you

[incorrect-one-piece-quotes]

Buggy: and Shanks is being...

Rayleigh: Shanks?

Buggy: A total ass, yes.

#source: hellsing ultimate abridged #Buggy The Clown #buggy #one piece buggy #dark king rayleigh #silvers rayleigh #one piece rayleigh #roger pirates #one piece #op #incorrect one piece quotes #one piece incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes

[spiltinksky]

Jisoo: No, Seungkwan, you’re not a Joey. You’re a Chandler trying to be a Joey and it just makes you come off as a Ross.

Seungkwan: Early seasons Ross?

Jisoo: No, seasons 6 to 9.

#jisoo #seungkwan #joshua #incorrect svt #incorrect seventeen #incorrect kpop #kpop #incorrect kpop quotes #incorrect seventeen quotes #incorrect svt quotes #svt incorrect quotes #svt #seventeen incorrect quotes #kpop incorrect quotes #seventeen #incorrect quotes #source: hellsing ultimate abridged

[needanevenbettername]

Andrew, lining up the gun to an escaping hitman.

Ashley: Better take the shot. You're letting him get away.

Andrew: If you just give me a second to concentrate, I coul-.

Ashley: He's getting away. He's running.

Andrew: I get it. I'm lining up the-.

Ashley: You're going to miss it.

Andrew: Just be quiet and let me-.

Ashley, smirking: Hey, Andy! Hey! Hey, Andy!

Andrew fires the gun, and takes out the would-be assassin.

Andrew: There! I took the fucking shot! He's dead! There's blood everywhere!

Ashley, smiling: Oh, you are just a treat.

#the coffin of andy and leyley #the coffin of andy and leyley incorrect quotes #ashley graves #andrew graves #tcoaal incorrect quotes #tcoaal #andrew x ashley #ashley x andrew #source: hellsing ultimate abridged

[oneshoulderangel]

Arthur: Kay, allow me to introduce our newest recruit

Lancelot extending his hand: Hello-

Kay: Wait, is this guy French?

Arthur: Yes, the lady of the lake recommended him.

Kay: We are really scrapping the bottom of the barrel here.

#arthurian legend #arthurian literature #king arthur #arthuriana #sir kay #sir lancelot #lancelot du lac #lancelot #incorrect arthurian quotes #source: hellsing ultimate abridged

[artemisfowlcodex]

Holly: And Artemis is being…

Butler: Artemis?

Holly: A total ass, yes.

#Artemis Fowl #incorrect quotes #Holly Short #domovoi butler #source: hellsing ultimate abridged

[cyber-streak-2]

*Ultra Magnus and Rodimus arrive back at the LL after Whirl finished dealing with something*

Ultra Magnus: What. Did. You. Do?

Whirl: ...Okay, first, I was minding my own business-

Rodimus: BULLSHIT!

Whirl: I waaaaas!

#transformers incorrect quotes #source: hellsing ultimate abridged #Ultra Magnus #Whirl #Rodimus #MTMTE #mtmte #ll #With Novafire-is-thinking

[incorrect-piltover-quotes]

Jinx: You've been really quiet for like five minutes now. Oh, I know why you're angry, it's because I went to Piltover isn't it?

Silco: Jinx, put Sevika on the phone.

Jinx: Really, you want- alright.

Silco: Whatever you do, do not let Jinx leave under any circumstances!

Sevika: Actually, she just left. She said she was going for a walk.

Silco: NOOOO!

#incorrect piltover quotes #incorrect quotes #submission #league of legends jinx #arcane silco #arcane sevika #jinx #silco #sevika #league of legends #arcane #riot games #source: hellsing ultimate abridged

[soullessbullshit]

Ayrenn, coming out of Tanzelwil: I’ll need to find a new advisor. Norion’s a traitor. Now he’s dead.

Urcelmo: Oh... That’s a... tragedy...

Ayrenn: Don’t weep for the stupid, you’ll be crying all day.

#incorrect quotes #elder scrolls #elder scrolls online #eso #ayrenn #queen ayrenn #urcelmo #battlereeve urcelmo #advisor norion #rites of the queen eso #source: hellsing ultimate abridged

[tf2incorrectquotes]

Classic!Heavy: How?! I shot you dead! How are you alive?!!

Medic: Fuck you, that's how.

#source: hellsing ultimate abridged #TF2 Medic #TF2 Classic Heavy #Team Fortress 2 #incorrect quotes

[superiorsturgeon]

Branwen Ultimate: Abridged!

Qrow: *relaxing on first class flight with a glass of wine*

Jaune: *sitting across from him, reading a comic book* So…where’s the champion girl?

Qrow: Oh, she’s downstairs!

Jaune: …wait, isn’t that the cargo hold?

Pyrrha: *locked in a coffin in the luggage area* I’m afraid of coffins, flying, and tight spaces…!😭

——————————————————————

Jaune: Okay, so we’re checked in!

Jaune: If this doesn’t sound too weird…you wanna get a soda? See a movie?

Qrow: You’re not my friend, you’re my bodyguard. Last for six weeks, and I MIGHT learn your name. Until then, you’re spare aura.

Jaune: Okay! Jeez! Fine!

——————————————————————

Qrow: *standing in a ruined hotel room surrounded by Atlas black ops bodies, on his scroll*

Qrow: So I was just minding my own business…

Glynda: BULLSHIT!!

Qrow: I WAS!

Glynda: *facepalming* Just…put the champion girl on the scroll…

Pyrrha: H-hello?

Glynda: Whatever you do, do not let him leave that hotel room!

Pyrrha: I’m sorry, Mister Branwen just left for a…walk?

Glynda: NOOOOO!!!

——————————————————————

Jaune: *sitting in his crappy hotel room in his boxers, watching tv and sipping a soda*

TV news: *showing Atlas black ops besieging the hotel* …and police have identified the suspects in the hotel as a blonde, a redhead, and some skinny Ozzy Osborne-looking motherfucker!

Jaune: *spits out soda*

—————————————————————

Jaune: *walks into black ops command tent wearing his armor and a helmet*

Jaune: *hacks down two soldiers and shield-slams another* One…two…three…

Jaune: *deflects bullets with his shield while moving around the room and cutting down soldiers* …four, five, six, seven…

Jaune: *walks out of burning command post tent as it bursts into flames* Now let’s see if he wants to get that drink with me! 😁

—————————————————————

Tyrian: *dramatically facing off with Qrow on the roof*

Pyrrha: *bursts out from under rubble and opens fire with her rifle* GET SOME!!!

Tyrian: *frantically deflecting shots*

Pyrrha: *unleashes a heavy dust round* Sting THIS!!

Tyrian: *narrowly deflects impact of heavy shot* Grrrr….! I’m getting real tired of this shit!

Qrow: *looming behind Tyrian with his scythe* You and me both! 😈

Tyrian: 😱

#rwby #jaune arc #pyrrha nikos #qrow branwen #tyrian callows #glynda goodwitch #source: hellsing ultimate abridged