#spent a while in Vegas with her brother. visited LA sometimes just to see her friends
im playing shadows of new york and i just. keep thinking about Penny....
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Could you please rec cherik fics where they still have powers but being mutant is well accepted? (Kind of like the Daycare Verse by brillingspoons) THANK U SO MUCH YOURE INCREDIBLE
Hi anon, of course I have a list for you. I am so sorry for the delay. I have been super busy lately with work and home renovations, but I’m back and I have a looong list for you. Now, the nature of x-men as a parallel of the very real fight of minority groups for civil rights makes it pretty hard to find fics where everyone accepts mutants.That’s actually why I love the x-men, because they represent the fight of those who are ostracised. So, some of these might have some social commentary, but the main focus does not lie there. Also, if you love the Daycare Verse check out pocky_slash’s fics (who actually wrote the majority of the Daycare Verse).
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Cherik ´Still Have Powers Modern AU´ Fic Recs
irreconcilable differences (make for surprisingly good bedfellows) – pocky_slash
Summary: Tonight on The Evening Report with Malcolm Stevens, noted geneticist and mutant equality proponent Dr. Charles Xavier faces off with the infamous mutant rights activist Magneto in a live televised debate over the Genetic Nondiscrimination Act.
(At least, if they can stop flirting long enough to stay on topic.)
Words and Pictures – pocky_slash
Summary: When Lorna's powers manifest early, Charles Xavier's mutant picture books are the perfect teaching tool. Erik just hadn't expected the author to be so young. Or attractive. Or available.
For the Record – endingthemes
Summary: As prominent figures in the mutant rights movement, activists Charles Xavier and Erik Lehnsherr are pretty much household names. When a romance scandal between them breaks, their celebrity reaches new heights, and though the increased exposure is great, there’s a big problem -- the two of them are just friends.
Too bad no one believes them.
Runs in the Family – Anonysquirrel (chibirisuchan)
Summary: Alex knew his own reputation. Hell, he'd started some of his own reputation, because it kept some of the smarter thugs off his back. Everyone knew Alex's reputation. There was no way Hank didn't know his reputation, but he'd brought Alex into a house with some really expensive things and a lot of innocent little kids and his too-friendly, too-harmless dad.
But clearly Hank hadn't told his family anything about Alex, just like he hadn't told Alex anything about his family. At least, not about the brain-breaking parts of his family.
"I didn't know where to start," Hank said, for the dozenth time.
Featuring mpreg!Charles in a Kiss The Cook apron, overprotective!Erik in wet black leather, and baked goods. Lots and lots of baked goods.
(Another segment of this series is posted under the Cookie Cutter fic collection - thanks again, Takmarierah!)
Impulse Decisions – listerinezero
Summary: Erik wakes up in Las Vegas with a hell of a hangover, a telepath in his bed, and a ring on his finger. Now what?
You Show Me Yours - endingthemes
Summary: When Erik receives nudes in the middle of the night from an unknown number, he's confused and mildly amused. He doesn't expect it to turn into an actual conversation...with feelings.
As if that's not baffling enough, his friend's brother ends up crashing at his place, further complicating everything.
Some Such Place (The Big Screen Classics Remix) - Pocky_Slash
Summary: Erik's spent the last eighteen months having lengthy socio-political conversations and casual sex with Charles Xavier after seeing Monday matinees at a dingy little independent movie theatre in the Village. That doesn't mean they're friends. Or that Erik should have any say in what Charles is going to do with his future.
(At least, that's what Erik keeps telling himself.)
Into Your Tar, Honey - tomato_greens
Summary: Really, Alex doesn’t know why he’s in the damn class.
(Or, the one in which Charles teaches an online Introduction to Biology course, and Alex reads more than he expected to.)
Heli Cases - Black_Betty
Summary: "Heli Cases" is a program on PBS whose aim is to educate on the rapidly increasing occurrence of genetic mutation in the general populous by breaking the complex science down into palatable, easy to digest pieces.
It is also the only thing that helps Erik get his fussy daughter to fall asleep.
(Featuring Dadneto, baby Lorna and the struggles of single fatherhood, and Charles as the host of a late night show about genetics.)
Bound - FuryRed
Summary: Is there anything worse than someone else’s wedding? Well, perhaps your sister’s wedding- where the groom just has to invite his boss and that man just happens to be your ex-boyfriend; a person you had an extremely passionate and tumultuous relationship with that ended badly.
Charles hadn’t seen Erik for a year by the time Raven had told him about the wedding. He wasn’t looking forward to the occasion, particularly when Raven explained that they would be celebrating the event with a two-week extravaganza at a luxury hotel, meaning that Charles would be forced to spend a whole fortnight with the man who he’d given everything to; the man who had ultimately broken his heart…
An Exercise in Frustration – ikeracity
Summary: Erik Lehnsherr's latest critically-acclaimed film Shame features a full-frontal nudity scene. His long-suffering husband Charles is really very peeved about it.
Eyes on Fire - Black_Betty
Summary: Every once in a while, fashion tycoon Emma Frost invites her favourite male models over to entertain her. And by "entertain", I mean she makes them have kinky consensual sex in front of her....Emma never touches herself when she watches, but she always has a glass of wine with her. Emma likes it best when they eventually forget that she's watching.
Charles and Erik meet each other through Emma...
(I've taken some liberties with the prompt, but all the sex is still there, and it's wholly consensual...and gradually, becomes more than just sex...)
Order Up - ikeracity
Summary: Charles has a terrible habit of multitasking, and that is probably why he absentmindedly tells the pizza man that he loves him when hanging up.
Then the pizza man says it back. And Charles is pretty much smitten from there.
Some Assembly Required - manic_intent
Summary: "Alex and Hank were two teenagers who frequently fight in school. One fight got so bad that the principal called in their fathers (as both came from single-parent families)/ guardians for a conference. This was how Charles and Erik meet."
Limited Release - rageprufrock
Summary: When Alex Summers broke out of supermax to rescue his stupid kid brother, he had no idea it was going to be so fucking complicated.
Math Reasons – pearl_o, pocky_slash
Summary: "Mom says Erik always knows what he wants, it just sometimes takes him a little while to actually realize it," Ruth said.
Charles fell in love with Erik the first night they met, the first week of freshman year. Two years of friendship, adventures, arguments, hijinks, secrets, and summer visits later, Erik is starting to catch up.
It’s kind of our whole thing – pearl_o, pocky_slash
Summary: After two years of best friendship, Charles and Erik thought they knew everything there was to know about each other. They're surprised, then, when their first summer as a couple reveals that they have a lot to learn about each other and themselves.
PART 2 of Math Reasons
A Nice Boy (The Family Matters Edition) – pocky_slash
Summary: Erik's not sure whether the problem is that he doesn't want his parents to meet Charles or that he doesn't want Charles to meet his parents. Either way, he never invites Charles to brunch. Why should he? It's not like they're dating.
apple season – pocky_slash
Summary: "You know," Charles says while they're sitting around the kitchen table reading the paper, "You should take Anya apple picking."
"Don't you mean 'we?'" Erik responds. The silence that follows is enough to make him re-examine his own apple picking memories a little more closely. Uneven ground littered with apples, tree roots, holes, and narrow passage between rows of orchard trees. "Oh," he says.
rooms/shares – pocky_slash
Summary: Erik is single, working a cube job he hates, letting his master's degree in mutant studies collect dust, and living on his best friend's couch. When she kicks him out, he's forced to trawl Craigslist for the least-offensive rooming option within his meagre budget. He never expects a response from the persnickety, high maintenance ad he replies to as a joke, but it's possible this too-nice apartment and mysteriously absent roommate might be the answer to all four of his problems.
Continue firm and constant – aesc
Summary: Moira hasn't seen her old partner in saving the world from threats human and intergalactic, Erik Lehnsherr, for a few years. When she finally does see him again, she finds a man different from the one who's been with her down in the dark and the dirt and the blood... or maybe he isn't so different after all.
Tough little baby telepath – aesc, pearl_o
Five Part Series
Summary: Teenage telepath Charles Xavier takes a job as a consultant, working with prickly police detective Erik Lehnsherr. Charles is used to being on his own and taking care of himself; he has no reason to think that his relationship with this stern, icy man is going to change any of that.
Frosted hearts – aesc, palalife
Summary: Emma Frost has 99 problems, but a date ain't one. Specifically, she has no time to play the dating game--which is fine with her, because she'd much rather run it instead. From a set of sleek, silver and white offices on Fifth Avenue and with her trusty, stylish, and silent partner Janos Quested, Emma has built Frosted Hearts into New York City's premiere dating service, built on the principle that money, and a sufficiently rigorous psionic scan, can, in fact, buy you love.
Somewhere in Frosted Hearts's server is one Charles Xavier, genius and geneticist, with the kind of nicely-starched good looks that sell well on brochures for New England prep schools. He's also a telepath who's decided to give up pursuing serious relationships and instead spend his thirties doing what he should have done as a teenager: have a lot of sex with random people. Fortunately for him, Erik Lehnsherr, metallokinetic and engineering executive, has absolutely no time in his heart or his schedule for anything more serious than... well, absolutely nothing romantic at all.
Mercy of the Fallen (the AirDrop Security Update 2.0) – pocky_slash
Summary: Erik Lehnsherr feels defined by his past sins and after years of acting against his own moral compass, he's finally struck out on his own. He's his own boss now, and determined to work hard to help the mutant community and make up for years of doing someone else's dirty work.
Complicating this is Charles Xavier, mutant advocate, genetics professor, unfairly attractive telepath, and owner of the coffee shop below Erik's office. Erik may not think he deserves to be a part of the community he's thrown himself into helping, but Charles has other ideas on the matter, and he's determined to do everything in his power to make Erik see himself as a force for good.
you follow and i’ll lead – pearl_o, pocky_slash
Summary: When Charles discovers how frustrated and self-conscious his best friend Erik is about his ignorance about sex, he's eager to volunteer to help teach him and practice. Charles might not have any more direct experience than Erik, but he does have a telepath's mind full of accidentally picked-up fantasies and memories, as well as knowledge of a few dirty books - and more importantly, he's been madly in love with Erik for years. This seems like a brilliant, once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that he can't pass up.
Now he just needs to manage to keep his feelings in check, and not ruin their friendship forever.
Snail Mail – pocky_slash
Summary: Alex isn't thrilled when his boss, Erik, starts sending him to hand deliver notes to Erik's husband up at the university--that is, until he sees the Professor's hot new TA, and suddenly, the notes can't come fast enough. If only Alex could work up the guts to ask him out....
this is life (and everything’s all right) – pocky_slash
Summary: Edie Lehnsherr came into Charles' life long before he ever heard Erik Lehnsherr's name, and her death left a gaping hole in the lives of everyone in Charles' family. As the first Purim without her approaches, he begins to get creative in his efforts to bring everyone out of their grief. Kitchen creativity, however, is not quite his strength....
Watching the Detectives – Clocks
Summary: Detectives Charles Xavier and Erik Lehnsherr are good friends and colleagues. However, when they go undercover at a Christmas party to nab a prime suspect, Erik keeps reminding himself to stay professional and ignore feelings of unexpected jealousy.
Student/Teacher Relations – PoorMedea
Summary: As a TA, Charles knows he can't get involved in all his students' lives. He needs to keep professional boundaries, to make sure that he's an authority figure. But when he accidentally finds out how complicated Erik Lehnsherr's home life is, he suddenly finds that distance hard to maintain.
Fill for the prompt: Erik is the teen dad of adorable baby!Lorna. I just want teen!Erik being a dad, with adorable interactions between him and his baby. Angst is good too since there's always going to be some in such situations, but mainly I want to see teen dad Erik being an awesome dad who loves the hell out of his daughter despite whatever else may be going on.
Conspiracy of Kisses – Alaceron
Summary: Seven-year-old Erik needs to keep his telepathic best friend Charles from finding out that he wants to kiss him. But that's okay, because he has a plan - he'll put on a tinfoil hat.
Favorite Mistake – endingthemes
Summary: Charles Xavier doesn’t think anything of it when he sneaks out without even saying goodbye to his latest one-night stand. What he doesn’t expect is to walk into his new position in the Xavier Industries marketing department and find that his latest hook-up is now his new boss.
Never Take Biology for Granite – ikeracity, pangea
Summary: Charles is an internet celebrity who garners his fame from posting educational, in-depth videos about a different animal every week, though for some reason his viewers are always more interested in his sex life with his geologist husband, Erik, who happens to frown heavily upon all living things.
Except for Charles, of course, whom he's missed these past couple days while attending a geologic convention--though considering the subject material of Charles' newest video, he's wishing he would've stayed away longer.
This Is Not Comedy – baehj2915
Summary: Written for amarriageoftrueminds' prompt for a Cherik version of Louis CK's tangent about the fuckability of Ewan McGregor.
Naturally the similarities end there. I made this about Erik's full on public lust-filled gay revelation, and the chaos that spirals from there.
Snowed In – dedkake
Summary: Charles and Erik have a one night stand, but a blizzard traps them in Erik's apartment afterward.
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I love when new characters talk to me, and especially when they involve established characters in what they’re telling me. So here’s a few new things
-Reverend is RJ’s son, with his brother’s wife. When RJ first came into my head, he established he was Rev’s uncle and his brother hated him because he’d fucked his wife, not once but twice. The first time was 2 days before their wedding and the second happened sometime in the middle of their marriage, before Rev was born.
Turns out there’s a bit more to that. RJ and Willow (There’s a reason all of the Jamison boys have weird names, mom was a hippie, though now she’s turned into more of a Stepford) has been dating throughout most of high school. Or...what you might call dating. RJ would take her out on his bike, they’d have sex and then get dinner somewhere before he’d take her home. He was very much in love with her but him going nowhere fast in life scared her because she wanted security more than love. RJ’s brother Darren somehow convinced her that his brother was never going to marry her, or give her a safe, secure life (he was in a gang, after all) and so she ended up running off with him. Pissed and hurt because his brother not only stole his girl but it seemed that his girl never actually loved him, RJ got her into bed with one more time, before they were married, and had his way with her. Afterward, he told her she’ll never get what she wants out of his brother, they both know she’s a trashy little whore and likes to be treated like it. She slapped him, married his brother and 2 years later had their first son, Dax. (I’ll have to figure out everyone’s ages, the way it’s looking RJ might be 50 instead of 42)
When Dax is 5, RJ was just getting out of jail and with nowhere to go, he fell onto his brother’s house in suburbia, seemingly trying to get his feet back on the ground. The Slayers have his back, of course, but he spent 7 years in jail for possession with intent to sell and was released due to overcrowding and the non-hostile nature of his crime made him less of a dangerous criminal. His brother spends several days berating RJ, continuously referring to him by Robert instead of his monicure, which he hates. When Darren leaves home for a business trip, he tells his brother he can stay for another week, then he’s got to leave. He can’t have “his type” in this neighborhood. Willow ends up crawling into bed with him the same night her husband leaves on his trip and the two spend most of that week doing nothing other than each other. Before Darren returns home, RJ tells Willow he’s leaving, she’s not going to get to keep him as a fuck toy unless she tells his brother the truth.
Afraid of losing her nice house and fancy car, she instead tells Darren that RJ raped her and threatened Dax. Darren confronts his brother and the two go at each other, ending with RJ pulling his switchblade on his brother and telling him that Willow is only with him for his money. Enraged and unable to think straight, RJ breaks into their house while the two are visiting the Hamptons and steals money that Darren has hidden, even from his wife, in Dax’s toy box. He ends up arrested, this time for trespassing but there’s no real proof he did anything. Dax had been home when it happened, never really allowed to go to the Hamptons or anywhere else with his parents and told the police that RJ only got him some water and spent the night on the floor of his room before leaving when the babysitter came back. His parents get in a little trouble because their sitter wasn’t staying all night though they claim not to know anything about that.He’d seen his uncle but refused to tattle on time, RJ never hurt him, didn’t even threaten him. (Who threatens a 5 year old?)
Willow seeks out RJ about 4 months later and says she’s pregnant with his kid and he needs to take “responsibility for his crimes against her” He tells her to get fucked, if she wants him to take care of it so bad, give him the kid. She never comes back, and 5 months later gives birth to Reverend. Her husband knows he’s RJ’s kid and they raise Rev with the same kind of hands-off, who cares as long as we’re rich, mentality that Dax had gotten up til then.
-When Rev gets into middle school he meets Zachary Sullivan, though because of a speech impediment he’s unable to say Zach, he starts calling his new friend Jax. Jax takes it, originally finding the younger boy annoying but eventually they become pretty fast friends. Especially since Jax is the “wrong sort” Willow and Darren want their son hanging around, that fuels a fire in both boys and they become inseparable. Jax learns about blood brothers from something he’s reading so he and Rev do that, cutting their hands and agreeing they will always be friends. Every attempt by Darren and Willow to separate the boys fail, and eventually Rev’s parents throw in the towel and give up altogether.
-when Jax is 19, he tries to go through the Slayers’ initiation, which culiminates in getting into a pit with the leader’s pet tiger, Zara. She’s generally well behaved but a bit battle scarred as she’s been doing this for some time. (RJ gave her the scar above her right eye when he went through it when she was still young) Rev never made it past the first round of tests, but he’s supporting Jax when he climbs into the tiger pit. Jax can’t stand the heat, though bows out gracefully as you can when faced with a massive tiger growling at you. He’s told to leave, but at least gained the respect of the Slayers.
-Jax joins a small gang of petty car thieves, and Rev does as well and over time, Jax becomes their leader, pushing the original guy down below him. Damien is pissed but Jax doesn’t stay in that position all that long. He gets involved with a man named John but is rather unceremoniously thrown into a dumpster when John’s friend Ryki, who is also a member of Jax’s gang, finds out what kind of abusive boyfriend he is.
-Rev, having just been arrested while the Jax, John and Ryki thing is happening, is bailed out by his father who is utterly disgusted by the boy with scattered tattoos, and blue streaks in his hair (which John did). While driving Rev home and angrily venting about how this behavior is going to stop, Darren pops off with how he shouldn’t be surprised, Rev is turning out just like his good for nothing father. Confused, Rev asks what he means and finds out Darren’s side of the truth, which his mother repeats, almost word for word. Angry and confused, he asks Dax, who is packing to leave home as well, not wanting to deal with this train wreck of a family anymore. Especially since their parents now have Falco, their baby brother and model to dote on and use. Dax tells him that no matter what mom and dad say, uncle RJ has never been anything but kind to him. He tells Rev that he remembers their mom going into the room RJ was staying in willingly, a lot, and only getting mad when he told her he was leaving. He also tells Rev that RJ would probably have been a better father. Dax leaves that night and never looks back, moving to Las Vegas.
-Rev originally wanted to get RJ to help him but after meeting an angry Jax after Ryki “threw him away” and his crazy mother kicked him out after finding out her son is gay, the two decide to just leave California and never look back. Rev steals about $700 from his mother’s purse, and get into Jax’s POS car. Wherever it stops, they stop. They wind up in southern Illinois, moving into a small apartment complex in Belleville together. Jax isn’t gay, he’s bi, but very homophobic even towards himself. Rev meets Drake and Jax starts dating Kristy and the rest is history.
-Skip to 2006, RJ gets a call from his sister in law out of the blue telling him that his son, Reverend, has just married a psychopath in southern IL and they now have some kind of demon spawn together, before hanging up. RJ is, admittedly, a little confused by the entire conversation and thinks nothing of it until the uprising in the Slayers following the death of their leader and Queenie’s promotion to their new leader. Some understand and follow the “family don’t end in blood” rule (meaning if you’ve been brought into the Slayers and completed the initiation through the blood rite, you become family and the selection of leaders is passed on through the lines, even if that means a 3 year old kid is now your boss) Others, like the Vikings and a handful of others tried challenging the rule, causing dissent and ultimately infighting leads to RJ getting shot, twice. The first time was from Rollo when he tried to shoot Queenie. Rollo pays for that mistake by taking a barbed wire baseball bat to the face, courtesy of RJ and dies of a broken neck. The second time is by Lisa “Lagratha” his ex-lover whom he broke up with after he starting pursuing his current girlfriend and the mother of his child. While he’s on the ground and with a bullet in his hip he realizes he has a kid he’s never known, is about to be a father again and has a grandchild and he wants to have something resrmbling a relationship with them. Even if Rev tells him to fuck off, at least he would have tried.
-RJ volunteers to go to IL and speak with the gang leaders in Chicago and the Scorpions of East St Louis, figuring he’ll stop in to see Rev and the so-called psychopath while he’s there. After being met at the border of Chicago and threatened by the Marcone crime family, he heads down to Belleville to find Reverend. What he finds is pretty close to what he’d been expecting. While Drake is a little odd, her and Rev are sweet together and the boy found genuine love with her. The two talk outside for a while, RJ tells Rev he’s about to be a father himself and would like more than anything to be part of his life and that of his granddaughter’s as well if Rev would have him. Rev doesn’t put much thought into it, telling him that he and his family are going to be moving back to LA in a few months after they settle some things here, since he got offered an internship at Henson Studios and they’re going to be closer, he’d love to have Sunny know an actual grandpa, as opposed to his now estranged parents.
-RJ tells Rev by agreeing to spend time with him, he, Drake and Sunny are coming under the protection of the Slayers and if they need anything they have a very large family watching out for them. Through Rev, he also gets to meet with the East St Louis Scorpions and strikes a deal with their leader wherein one (or more if they want)of their guys gain access to the Slayers in LA and have a permanent place in their meetings and vice versa.
-RJ has two vehicles (3 if you count the silver bullet trailer he lives in), one is a ‘96 Trans AM he’s been rebuilding for a while. This is what he drives to Illinois.
The second is his motorcycle, a Harley Davidson sportster with custom exhaust. This is what he was riding when he meet Jamie.
((Side note, Ragnar and his Vikings don’t end up leaving LA completely, as he gets involved with a good little Catholic boy, and tries to convince Ireena that he didn’t know Rollo and Floki were going to start an all out uprising with them and he, Lagretha and some younger ones would like to return to the Slayers, since no one else will have them)))
(((One other side note, RJ wears a small vial of blood around his neck hidden inside of a hollowed out bullet casing. He said it’s the leaders’ and his best friend’s blood, which he keeps close to his heart at all times. He notices that Rev wears one too and when he asks why, rev tells him it’s just a bullet from he and Jax were younger and struck up their blood brother pact. They had found the bullets along a back road and Rev emptied and cleaned them, filling them with sand and turning them into pendants that both the boys still wear. RJ makes a crack about Rev winding up like him after all when Rev tells him the relationship he and Jax have is thicker than blood. )))
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DEAR JOHN
Dear John
By: Nicholas Spark
John Tyree was lived in Wilmington North Carolina, with his father it because John Tyree’s mother was left when John Tyree’s born. And his father was collecting coins in their cities. They weren’t rich, but they live close enough to the rich area for John Tyree’s attend one of the best high schools in the city. And every day that John Tyree attended his schools, his father he always preparing his breakfast like scrambled eggs, toasted bread, and bacon. And John Tyree most spent his evenings alone, because his father was busy in collecting coins.
When John Tyree is teenager he always hangout with his friends. He didn’t even know what to do on his future, but he still pretend that everything was okay. John Tyree graduated in his high school but he didn’t went to college, it is because he want to earn money by himself. He work as a bus boy at Outback Steakhouse, tearing ticket stubs at the Local Movie Theater, loading and unloading boxes and staple them, cooking pancakes at Waffle House, working as a cashier at tourist place but he get fired because of envious, still he don’t care about it and all he want is just to live a happy life and the freedom that he want.
Every night he went at the Leroy’s bar then he began to realize that everything was still the same. He drinks beers bump with someone he had known from high school, he even dated dozens of woman that night. Most were forgettable relationships. He used women and also use himself to be use. But then when he saw Lucy he fell into her charms and fell in love with her. They were at the Leroy’s bar and have a little chitchat. But a year later John Tyree ask for her number and called her, they talk for almost 20 minutes only. And he noticed that Lucy were already engage to an attorney and they will get married in the following June. The phone call affected him more than he thought.
And the day came, John Tyree went back in his old self, drinking beers, thinking meaning less relationship and lack of direction. Because he was so hurt when he knew that Lucy is already engaged. He always pretend that everything in his life was okay, although it’s not. But then he takes his father’s advice to him and that is to get a college degree, so he could joined in the military. He thought first that he’d join the marines since they’re the guys he was most familiar with. But when the time came he choose to be an army and then he was certified as an infantry division aka big red one. And he was destined in many country to work. He only had a few weeks of leave and he spent his first week at their house in Wilmington NC.
And his second week of leave at Las Vegas, because one of his buddies had grown up there and three of them crashed at their parents place. On his third leave he came back to Kosovo, then he decided to head back home hoping the boredom of the visit would be enough to calm his mind. Because of the distance, his father and John Tyree they seldom talked on phone, but his father wrote him a letter that were always postmark on the first of every month. Nor did his father mention coins. Instead, his father wrote the changes in their neighborhood and a lot of weather; when John Tyree wrote and tell to his father about the pretty hair firefight that had been in Balkans, then his father wrote again to say that, he was glad that he is survive, and he didn’t say more about it. The fact that John Tyree was in peril frightened to his father so he started committing the scary stuff.
Instead, he sent his father a letter about the most boring job ever invented and that the only exciting to happen with John Tyree in a weeks, was trying to guess how many cigarettes of other guard, would actually smoke in a single evening. His father ended a letter with the promise that he would write.
John Tyree was on his leave and spent at their house in Wilmington, NC. And on his leave he spent sometimes on beach. When he done surfing he rest in a few minutes, and heard the group of people chitchat with someone in there group at the bridge. When they are continued to chitchat, Savannah put his bag at the side, but when Randy try to sit down, the bag of Savannah fall over on the water. Randy try to get it, but it’s too late because John Tyree is jump from the bridge when he saw the bag of Savannah is on the water.
And then Randy try to get the bag from John Tyree, he just ignore it and continue to walk for him to give back the bag of Savannah. And then, Savannah says thank you to John Tyree. And then, Savannah introduce herself, then John Tyree did the same. So that, in that incident, John Tyree and Savannah knowing each other by spending time together on the beach and hanging out with Savannah’s friends.
Savannah Lyn Curtis is a college student, who’s leading a group of coeds in building habitat for humanity homes. She and her group rented a beach house to use during their stay at Wilmington NC. John Tyree and Savannah hail from different backgrounds: Savannah grew up in a Christian home with two devoted parents, while John Tyree was raised by a quiet, meticulous father with passion for coin collecting.
Nevertheless, they feel an instant connection and begin to spend every free moment together. But then John Tyree noticed that Tim the childhood friend of Savannah was secretly in love with Savannah. But Tim could not told his feelings about Savannah. At the end of John Tyree’s leave, the two had fallen in love and promise to be married if John Tyree’s discharged. Meanwhile, they still have a communication through writing a letters and phone call. And follows the ups and downs of their long distance relationship, including their joyful moments and arguments during John Tyree short army leave.
Savannah understands, but she can’t hide her disappointment. Time and distance begin to take toll, and then Savannah send a letter to John Tyree saying that she’s been in love with someone else. John Tyree try to deal with his emotions by burying himself to his military career, and spend time to his ailing father.
When Savannah met John Tyree’s father years earlier, she suggested he might have Asperger’s Syndrome, a disorder resembling autism. As John Tyree begin to understand the disorder, he comes to deeply appreciate the man who raised him that his health was finally fails, John Tyree learn to his father that has left him a coin collection worth a small fortune. John's father dies after suffering from several heart attacks.
One day he saw Savannah the girl he love was already married Tim and they had been living together with the brother of Tim which is Allan who suffers from Autism.Tim was in ill, when he was in his death bed,he asks John Tyree to marry Savannah for his happiness before he die. But, John Tyree made his decision in his life, he sells his Father’s coin collection in order for Tim finds a treatment for his Melanoma.John decides to realize that if a man is selfless enough to let that love of his love go to another man than he was worth living. In that day Tim was on his death bed, but he still care for Savannah’s happiness and safety.The treatment for Tim was works and he released from the hospital. John Tyree didn’t regret everything by loving Savannah.
John Tyree- John Tyree is one of the main characters in the story. John is a staff sergeant in the United States Army Special Forces. He is a handsome, buff, soft spoken man and cares for his father very much even though his father is diagnosed with Autism and does not talk very often. John loves to surf and hang out on the beach. When John meets this wonderful girl named Savannah Lynn on the beach, his life is turned around. John fell in love with Savannah Curtis in two weeks. Two weeks it took to fall in love with her. During the story, John gets pretty emotional because he did not expect to come back home for two weeks and fall in love with a girl. When he gets deported, he tells her, "No matter where you are in the world, the moon is never bigger than your thumb (Sparks Pg. 130)." He says that because he wants Savannah to truly know that he loves her no matter where he is. John is mostly a loving, caring, down to earth person and always love Savannah and his Father.
Savannah Lyn Curtis- Savannah is the main character of the story who is very respectful, but mostly soft spoken. She is a shorter blonde whose st people in general. She loves to give back to the community such as help building houses. In the beginning, Savannah is kind of shy but throughout the book when she meets John, she starts to open up and talk more. Savannah is known for her faith. She never gives up and she even says to John when he gets deported, "See you soon then (Sparks Pg. 137)." She never says goodbye because she knows that she will see John again!
Bill Tyree-Bill Tyree is John Tyree's father. Bill was diagnosed with autism so he isn't a very social person and does not talk very often. Because of Bill's autism, he doesn't really have much to do. What Bill does throughout his day is look and clean his coin collection. Bill collects coins and is really satisfied with them. He feels like he is safe. When Bill told John how much he meant to him before he died, it really touched John because his dad did not say much and it was amazing to hear all of that come out of him. Overall, Bill is pretty much anti-social, caring person.
Tim-Tim was Savannah's family and her friend. Tim was also in love but Savannah didn't feel the same about him. He went to the same collage as Savannah. He was a good person; he also form part of the church group that build houses for the needy.
Randy- Randy was Savannah's friend; but not to close. He wanted to go out with Savannah but she didn't feel the same, she thought that she wasn't the kind of girl he liked; that he just think she was.
Alan- who suffers from autism.
OPINION
My opinion about the story of Dear John, sometimes your relationship was strong if your been together, but if you far from each other, coldness and sadness can change your love by someone, like Savannah did. Because of missing John Tyree, she really needs his presence so that she can’t hide the loneliness and sadness to her love one. But if you really wants to keep your relationship strong, build trust it because trust is the best foundation in your relationship. Then trust God decision, if you’re not meant to each accept it wholeheartedly because God’s has better one can love you most. So that Savannah married Tim, because was always been there for Savannah then Savannah was fall in love with Tim. Then John Tyree, accepts everything although it hurt but he want to see Savannah happy that to see Savannah suffering in sadness. Letting someone is a right decision, because if you love someone you will let him/her go and support his/her happiness. Then wait for the right guy in God’s perfect time.
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End of the Year
I’m going to be sappy for a second because I’m definitely one of those people that takes this time of year to reflect upon all that has happened and how it all may affect the new year.
The beginning of 2019 was difficult. A lot happened that made me struggle with my mental health, but I also finally took the steps I needed to seek the help that would get me through the day. My 90 days as the ZooMobile Coordinator occurred on January 12th, and I spent that next weekend in Santa Monica. The fact that I live so close to California and the ocean still eludes me. January also included my decision to participate in my first aerial showcase at Vertical Fix. Little did I know how much it would mean to me.
February didn’t include anything major from what I can remember. I continued training as an aerialist, learning to love the trapeze, and I traveled to some fun places in Arizona, including Ajo, where they have a lot of beautiful murals to explore.
My first aerial performance was on March 22nd, and I had so many people show up to support me. I overcame my stage fright, fell in love with my makeup and costume, and I put everything I had into what I brought to the audience. It was magical. Of course, that meant I had to do it again in another few months!
March was also the month when I met April. We started talking via Instagram and met in Papago Park to take pictures of yoga poses. Needless to say, we became fast friends, and I couldn’t be more thankful to have her in my life.
The next month included seeing Cirque du Soleil’s AmaLuna and hanging out in Las Vegas with my sister, Lizzy, and two of her friends who also became my friends! We didn’t do anything too crazy, but it was an incredibly fun weekend and one I still look back on fondly.
May brought the end of my overnight travel season for ZooMobile. The season had come and gone, and my last couple of weeks were spent in Flagstaff. I also got my wisdom teeth out! Which wasn’t super fun but the process was fairly easy and didn’t end up in any issues afterwards. I also started rehearsals for my second student showcase at Vertical Fix! This time, I was set on doing a performance on sling, a squishy version of the trapeze.
In June, I went on my first long vacation since moving to Arizona. I went up to Wisconsin to stay with Lizzy and also got to spend a couple of days with my other sister, mom, and my grandma. We celebrated her 90th birthday! When Lizzy visited me over the holidays in 2018, she said she wanted to retire in Phoenix. When I was in Wisconsin, I said I would retire there.
July included so many great things, and I didn’t even know it at the time. I went to LA to visit Laura for her birthday, and we went to Disneyland. My first visit! She and I had decided that we were going to be roommates, so it was also a great opportunity to get to know each other better. Of course, she did take me to a boarded up mental hospital…at night. My second student showcase was on July 20th, and I completely loved becoming the Mad Hatter. April came to see me with her husband, and she was sold on being involved in the next one! I also decided to go on a date with someone named Tim on July 26th. We liked each other pretty quickly, and it continued on from there.
Once August started, it was time to begin my ZooMobile season again. I wouldn’t be doing any overnights just yet, but the summer had gone by fast. I did decide to begin volunteering as a Volunteer Keeper Assistant in our Equine Department, and I loved spending my Mondays with the horses!
My brother, Mario, turned 30 in September, so that meant I got to plan my first trip back home since moving to Phoenix. Right before his birthday, though, I spent time with Tim to celebrate his birthday. We went on a great hike in Prescott and had some pretty delicious food! He had also helped me move into my new apartment with Laura before my vacation. Vacation with my family meant a new tattoo, paying for my brother to get his first tattoo, and making tamales from scratch for the first time! I had only ever helped assemble them in the past. It felt like a rite of passage, and me and Lizzy did a really great job! All too fast, though, my vacation came to an end, and I went back to the Southwest.
October! One of my favorite months of the year. Tim and I went to Vegas together for a weekend. We had a great time, and he was definitely more of an adult than I was. We also said “I love you” for the first time, and I still feel lucky to have him in my life. In my new apartment, I adopted two cats from a friend, and I loved them immediately. Posey and Fester are my children now, and I get sad when I’m away from them for even just a few days.
Before I knew it, November was here. I attended the Vertical Fix showcase to see April and other friends perform, and it made me realize that I would have to try and be in the next one. Tim and I took our first long vacation together and spent a week in Park City, Utah. We did a lot of staying in the hotel, but it was so relaxing. One of the highlights, though, was getting to swim in hot springs that are in a crater! It was incredible. Tim and I also took part in a 5K Bubble Run. The bubbles were dyed to color our clothes, and we did more walking than running, but it was an accomplishment! At the end of November, I had gotten to celebrate Thanksgiving with Tim and his family and hosted a Friendsgiving for all of the amazing people I’ve met thus far while living in Arizona.
And now, it’s December. With less than one week until 2020, I can’t believe everything that has happened this year. For my birthday, my friend Alex hosted a birthday party with an Ugly Christmas Sweater theme, and I received my first aerial apparatus as a gift from Tim. On Christmas Day, I went with Tim to spend the day with his family. His parents and sisters had gotten me gifts as well, and I felt very special. The holidays may not be my favorite time of year anymore, but they are made exponentially better when they aren’t spent alone. I’ve created a home here, and my life is rich with the people I’ve met. There are difficult days, and I sometimes only want to stay in bed. I don’t know if I am working in the job I want to stay in forever, and I still miss having more trees and green grass surrounding me. But overall, 2019 has given me a lot. I can only hope 2020 has even more exciting plans in store.
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⟨ *.:。┊ — Emerald Scott : Career. ⟩
“Every secret of a writer’s soul, every experience of his life, every quality of his mind, is written large in his works.”
— Virginia Woolf
up to 30 short stories published in different magazines / websites (and counting bc she still writes and publishes short stories from time to time)
gramma : a small boy has to stay home alone to keep watch over his bedridden grandmother, who he's always been scared of. As the story progresses, we find out he has good reason to be afraid. ((mentions of abuse))
the raft : a group of four friends go night swimming in a lake, only to get trapped on the wooden raft by a mysterious creature. ((supernatural , suspense))
nona : from prison, an unnamed man recounts his life as a college dropout who met and fell in love with a beautiful girl named nona, while aimlessly hitchhiking on a snowy winter's night in maine. that night, the narrator is seduced by nona into murdering several innocent bystanders. ((gory descriptions))
the library policeman : tell of sam peebles, who pushed by supernatural events in his hometown library is forced to battle an age-old fear and traumatic events from his past. ((supernatural , mentions of abuse))
autopsy room four : howard cottrell awakes from some form of unconsciousness to find himself laid out in an autopsy room. after realizing that he isn't dead, howard deduces that he is in a paralysed state. howard tries to somehow inform the doctors of this fact before they cut into him. ((suspense))
remember me : written in letter form , a woman recounts her last night of passion with her lover as she bids him goodbye. at the end of the letter, she reveals herself as a demon who’s laid eggs inside of him. ((supernatural , very nsfw , gory descriptions))
it lives in the woods (2013)
a group of kids played with a creature in the woods until one of them disappeared. as teenagers, they find out he’s back thanks to a serie of supernatural events affecting them and everyone in town.
first novel em got published (she was 18)
she had been working on that and building onto her manuscript since she was 15.
even when she had already published lots of short stories people were a lil hesitant to gamble on a whole ass book by a fairly young girl and ilitw was rejected 27 times before she got a deal
got into the new york times best selling list though and was praised for the intricate plot and maturity of her writing
lots of supernatural elements and gory descriptions
the haunting of brainwood mannor (2014)
a woman goes back to the house where her brother died when they were kids and realizes there were far stranger things in that place than she remembered.
not her finest work, it was finished but it just wasnt ... emerald level of finished. not all can be winners right ?
she was rushed to publish something to ride her first book’s tail so she gave them this one rather than the book she was working on (see below) so she’d have more time to work on it
she’d like to rewrite it again sometime but let’s be real... she probably won’t, even when she has rewritten snippets of the novel corrected in her notebooks
something between a short novel and a long short story
supernatural and psychological horror
we don’t talk about this book
the analyst (2016)
'happy fifty-third birthday, doctor. welcome to the first day of your death. you ruined my life. and now I fully intend to ruin yours.’ until the moment he opens the letter, new york psychologist dr frederick starks has led a quiet and, so he believes, blameless life. he has no idea why he's being judged by this unknown tormentor a former patient - who then lethally begins to demonstrate the potential of his, or her, threats. as the layers of starks's carefully constructed life are stripped from him, he quickly finds himself a powerless pawn in a psychopath's devious game of vengeance.
huuuuuge improvement from her last book
psychological thriller
it’s open-ended but em has never really said whether she’s planning on writing a sequel or not, even though she has the outline for it written in a notebook somewhere.
she wrote this book under the pseudonym poppy everhart so people wouldn’t associate it with her last book lol
it helped to it being a hit because she refused to give any interviews / do any tours so you know... mystery (plus the book is good mind you!)
the library of the dead (2018)
assigned to the high-profile "doomsday" serial killer case, fbi agent will piper is hitting dead end after dead end. the victims seem to have nothing in common: age, background, or even the way they die. all that connects them is a postcard each received in the mail announcing his or her date of death—all sent from las vegas, where a brilliant computer scientist leads a double life. just when agent piper finds a credible lead, he's removed from the case. continuing the investigation on his own, he must outwit a ruthless team of covert operatives from area 51 protecting the government's greatest secret. from a medieval monastery to a cutting-edge government laboratory, library of the dead delivers a richly detailed, thought-provoking exploration of fate, predestination, and the choices we make in life.
also written under her pseudonym (only very few people know she’s the author behind those two books)
sounds ridiculous. never ask her to explain the plot of her book lmao
the first of what was announced recently as a trilogy
she spent a year and a half just doing research for it as it has lots of historical elements, including visiting archaeological sites in europe and lots and lots of libraries
also lots of nsfw
she’s gotten offers from netflix to turn the story into a show but she refuses to hear a word about it until she finishes the books, and maybe not even then lol
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Up On Cripple Creek
“Good luck had just stung me,
to the race track I did go.
She bet on one horse to win
and I bet on another to show”
- The Band
I am an enormous fan of horse racing and have been for a long time. I chuckled a bit at the recent “controversy” at the Kentucky Derby and at those who suggested the result was unfair. Anyone who knows anything about the sport knows that was an easy call and we have all had winners taken down for that reason (on one glorious afternoon at Arlington a couple of summers ago I had TWO winners taken down after inquiries). It’s part of a sport that needs to be carefully regulated due to the gambling involved and the danger recklessness can bring to the jockeys and horses involved. So, while the decision was clear cut, I recognize how difficult it was for the judges to do what they did in front of millions of people who probably didn’t know much more about racing than the fancy hats and mint juleps. I’m also grateful we are not talking about a catastrophe that was adverted by some skillful moves by the jockeys on the horses that were affected by the interference. All-in-all, it was the best result possible given the circumstances.
But last week’s race is not what I want to talk about today. Rather, why it is that I am such a big fan of a sport that is frankly not all that popular anymore. The truth is that there was one very special person who help me develop the bug and who I thought of immediately when the Churchill Downs objection sign went up in that race. You are probably thinking you know who it is, but I’ll give you 10-1 odds you can’t guess.....no, it’s not my dad, or an uncle or grandfather. It was a quiet woman I knew named Rita Hendren.
Rita was, and still is to the day, one of the most interesting people I have ever met. Born in 1920 to a Southern Illinois coal miner, she was the fourth child of fifteen. That is not a typo. I met thirteen of them and can vouch that it was true (two passed away as infants as unfortunately was quite common at that time). Unlike today, where coal miners are men of great wealth, it was a tough living back then (before you write me a note, that was a joke). They lived in a small house with no indoor plumbing. Then, the depression hit and things really got rough. The story I was told was that when dinner time was called you ran to the table because the competition was fierce and there wasn’t always enough for everyone. Still, Rita would talk fondly of a childhood that seemed to have plenty of good times. I know better now that she likely sugarcoated some of the details, but generally she seemed to appreciate what she had.
She also appreciated her education and graduated high school in the late 30′s. That may not impress many people these days, but a high school diploma was not an easy thing to obtain in that era, especially for a woman. I’m certain that now she would have been offered free rides to the college of her choice as she was well-read on many subjects and could speak intelligently on them all But for a career, she did what she had to do to make money and moved to Chicago where the jobs were. She eventually landed at the Sunbeam factory in Cicero where she worked for many years as a quality control inspector. But despite the blue-collar nature of her life, she spent whatever free time she had reading books and watching whatever was on WTTW. In addition, she read the Sun-Times cover to cover every day and also enjoyed music. She had this great old Zenith console stereo (her sister worked there) and played 45s all day long (lots of big band and country music). She also made the best fried chicken I have ever tasted and rarely eat it to this day because nothing I have had since then can cut it (including me trying her recipe once - I just can’t figure it out!).
While she would be reading the paper, I noticed she would linger in the sports section. Then, one day when I was at her house, she made a point to turn the TV to the old channel 26 to watch Phil Georgeff on his Hawthorne recap show. I asked her why the interest in such an odd thing. She just said that she loved watching the horses and had all her life. As I got older, I found out there was a guy at Sunbeam who booked bets (this was well before OTB’s on every corner) and she had some money down on a hot tip she got in one of the races. This did not shock or surprise me. I had been watching her rake in huge pots for years at the Christmas poker games with her brothers and she always talked about how she loved the excitement of Las Vegas the one time she had been there. I was awfully curious about how she got so good at handicapping races, but I hit my teen years and got distracted.
Then, I found out at around the age of 18 that I could bet myself on the races. I went a time or two and was pretty timid about the experience with limited success. At one point, I mentioned my trips to the track to Rita and she suggested we go together sometime. So, we planned for a nice day that spring when the Hawthorne meet started and I scraped up $20 to see what I could do with a real expert at my side. I don’t remember the exact results that day (let’s just say I didn’t get rich), but I do remember learning every in and out of how to read a race program that you would ever want to know. I came to appreciate the joy of the sport and getting to be an active participant. I know it sounds insincere, but the money doesn’t really matter. When I go to the track now, I don’t bet much more than I did then and still have tons of fun. I was given a gift of analysis that could be used in a really fun way. More importantly, it gave me insight into how this woman’s brilliant mind worked. There were times I felt bad that she was just a factory worker and didn’t get a real opportunity in life, but I realized that she was a pretty happy person despite a tough life (lots of sorrow for her came in many ways, but those stories are not for public consumption). Being around her taught me what it means to be tough and use what you’ve got and not to worry about what you don’t have.
I doubt it is much surprise that I’m talking about my grandmother (on my mom’s side). Eventually, she developed a form of dementia and the last decade or so of her life was a real struggle. That hurt me more than anything as I knew (along with many others) just how beautiful her mind was and it was tough to see her unable to use it. I never forgot, however, the lessons she taught me and the countless hours we spent talking about the news, listening to old records, or the time she talked me into ditching a class in college to meet her at old Sportsman’s Park. And, as bad as I felt for her not getting more opportunity in life, I was selfishly grateful that she didn’t. It enabled her to spend so much time with me and give me wonderful gifts like appreciating how to handicap a horse race. I look forward someday to sitting with one of my own grandkids and sharing whatever quirky knowledge I have that may be of interest. Until then, I’ll keep plugging away at my two or three times a year visit to the track and I’ll never forget who got me there in the first place.
So on this Mother’s Day, in addition to wishing my beautiful wife and wonderful Mom the most joyful of days, I want to send a special thanks to my Grandma, who I just know had a bet on the long shot Country House and was slyly smiling when he was put on top at 30-1 odds. I’m sure right now, she is using that bankroll to bluff her brothers out of another pot with a pair of fours with a glimmer in her eyes the whole time. And while I miss her a lot, it warms my heart greatly to know that she can be back doing what she loved best.
And, for all of you out there who are Moms, thank you for the special talents you have that sometimes may be overlooked, but make such a huge difference on your children’s and grandchildren’s lives. It is now more important ever that kids have strong female role models in their lives, and I was incredibly lucky to have several. You are now providing that to a new generation, and I hope you had a wonderful day with those you love and they were able to show you the appreciation you deserve.
Happy Mother’s Day,
Jim
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🖊🖊🖊🖊🖊🖊 !
does vesta have ocs? like so many. @serpcntloyalty !!
(you get three, because whew i have a few to answer and while i have more than enough ocs to fill all these, it takes time filling them in and i’m lazy by nature and i’m trying so hard to use ocs i don’t usually whinge on and on about no one loving.)
name: theodora bennettnickname: dora, dumb doraconnections/family: constantine bennett (twin brother), william ashley bennett (father), isabella warren nee bennett (aunt), leopold warren (uncle)common/original time period: 1920′soccupation: moll, blue film actressone favorite fact: dora once informed an agent of the bureau of prohibition, for whom she was being a confidential informant to get back at her mobster ex boyfriend, that she spent more money every year on shoes than he even took home in his paychecks. this was not true, but it incensed the man, and he chose to leave her alone to get some fresh air and look for something for lunch, after which her ex’s goons found and kidnapped her. the rest of that story is a lot less funny.loose history: the illegitimate daughter of ash bennett, of a small branch of the new york newspaper bennetts, dora and her brother con were raised by the dwindling household staff for the entirety of their lives. ash never married and was rarely present, and when he was, he was usually in the company of women of loose morals shall we say, and drunk. he wasted the family’s money so badly that by the time dora and her brother were grown, there was nothing left for them but the crumbling ruins of the family’s townhouse. dora got by by attaching herself to powerful men- and by making movies that were entirely illegal at the time. the movies paid the bills, and helped her pay off her brother’s gambling debts.can they be found on tumblr?: no, but her father, aunt and uncle all can be found at @avestaproduction
name: prudence connollynickname/alias: pru, alley rose, ali rose, allison rose, ali marie roseconnections/family: nonecommon/original time period: 1890′s-modernoccupation: club owner, vampireone favorite fact: ali was the first oc i ever made, back in 1996. at the time, she was 100% a self insert and while i still had the pre-turn of the century basis for her, she was originally from boston, vs new york. a child of one of the elder vampires in the night world series, she has since transformed quite a bit, and has a place as the owner of the club my pansy parkinson dances in in the early 2000′s in london, as well as having a careless and uncaring sire who abandoned her, leaving her with a fear of and distrust of other vampires.loose history: turned in the late 1800′s, and immediately abandoned, ali is a child of the darkness without guidance or master, and as such, answers only to herself. she loves her mortal employees, sometimes to the point of coddling them and almost turning them but at the last moment will always resist- she wants no one to live the life of loneliness she has. the only points of connection she really has are fleeting- there was a werewolf in the 1920′s, a british soldier in the 1940′s, a beautiful latina woman she met between clubs in the 1950′s in las vegas who she came the closest to turning, but her flings never last, and the only one who has ever managed to reemerge in her life, ever, is the werewolf- ben- who she both loves and wants to rip his lungs out of his chest just to make him bE QUIET.can they be found on tumblr?: yes! at @vampirethief
name: ylva siggadottirnickname: noneconnections/family: siggy ingvarsdottir (mother), rollo (father), all the ragnarssons and gyda (cousins), ragnar lothbrok (uncle), lagertha (aunt), princess aslaug (aunt)common/original time period: yay! a fun historically inaccurate variation of the viking era!occupation: survivorone favorite fact: when ylva was very little, she lived with her aunt hela and her uncle gier, and was often visited by her mother. she’s approx the same age as hvitsrk in the show, and while she might have been raised with her cousins she wasn’t- so she sees them as the villagers in kattegat see them- princlings, too good for the rest of us. she adores her cousin bjorn, but also sees him almost as an uncle based on their age difference.loose history: born during the “missing four years” in the show, somewhere in the middle, rollo was entirely unaware siggy was pregnant in the first place because she had left him behind to have the baby sequestered in her cousin’s home, not willing to let her condition be a determent to rollo’s potential political growth- not that drinking himself so stupid he was freezing in the gutter was any kind of growth. in the end, when siggy dies to save ubbe and hvitserk, no one alive save her aunt and uncle are even aware of ylva. her father leaves for frankia and that’s the long and short of it. she ought to have some claim to something, but both doesn’t know, and would never try.can they be found on tumblr?: yes, over at @norseblooded, my vikings multi, along with her older half-brothers who were killed before the beginning of the show- erik and ingvar- and her show canon half-sister, thyri.
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Liverpool Echo - March 29, 1979
Lady who was mother to a teenage revolution
Queenie - alone with her yesterday dreams
Interview by Moya Jones
FIFTEEN YEARS ago Beatlemania had Britain in its grasp. Then in one masterly stroke Brian Epstein hit the American public with the “Fab Four”. The States have never stopped screaming for more, though the Beatles as a group have split up and their own particular Svengali, tragically dead these 12 years.
What a showman Brian Epstein was. The first Beatle tour of the United States that he master-minded outdid anything the razzamatazz Americans had seen before. Liverpool’s ex-public school, furniture salesman was the first man to hire football stadiums and baseball parks for pop concerts.
It is fascinating to speculate on what might have been if this shy, charming man with the formidable temper had not died in the prime of his life, just 32 years of age. For six crowded years, from 1962 to 1967, Brian Epstein was the Pop scene. He changed the course of contemporary music, sparked off a teenage revolution and it all started when he was just 26.
Woman who longs to talk
Looking back, one wonders how he ever achieved such phenomenal success in such a short time. There was no family show-biz empire behind him, only a couple of furniture stores and a shop that sold sheet music and pianos. Not even guitars.
If anyone knows the inside story of Brian Epstein, it is his mother, Mrs. Queenie Epstein, who still lives in Calderstones, surrounded by pictures of her famous son. A lonely woman who longs to talk about the son she adored, yet is reluctant to do so, “because there has been enough talk.”
His success she takes as a matter of course. “I always knew he had potential even when he was having problems at school,” she said. “I knew it wasn’t lack of ability but rather too much of it. It was up to us to find out how to channel all that talent and potential.”
A Yorkshire lass who came to Liverpool as a bride 46 years ago, Queenie Epstein remembers the old Liverpool with affection as “a beautiful city with wonderful theatres.”
Her love affair with Liverpool was immediate and lasts to this day though she says, “It’s not the place it was.”
It was Queenie Epstein who sowed the seeds of her elder son’s infatuation with the theatre and music. “I’ve always loved the theatre,” she said, ‘And I started taking both the boys when they were quite young. It’s funny to think that Brian, whose favourite composer was Sibelius, should have become so involved with Pop music.”
In the early Sixties when he was struggling to launch the Beatles “and he did work hard, very hard, particularly in the early years,” said his mother, “We were all roped in to help. His brother Clive, even me.”
“At first Brian used to have me listening to the radio all day and every day just to hear whose records were being played and how often.”
When it all started to happen for the Epstein groups and Brian had to move his headquarters from Whitechapel to London he still asked for, and received, help from his family.
“At about the same time as Brian got established my husband began to take things easier in the family business and we both spent a lot of time in London with Brian. Oh they were exciting days. I used to do a lot of entertaining for Brian,” his mother recalled.
In his autobiography Brian Epstein is self critical of his behaviour to his parents. “I was not the best of sons,” he wrote.
“I won’t have that,” said his mother with a snap. “He was a very good son to me. Always thoughtful. We are not a demonstrative family and Brian was a very shy person but he was a wonderful son.”
If Brian Epstein took the teenage revolution he sparked off in his impeccable stride not so his mother.
“It was all exciting to me even when my friends said Brian was ruining the younger generation and Britain was going to the dogs,” said his mother. “I’ve always been stage struck. In love with the theatre, and it was terribly exciting to see it all from behind the scenes. I’ll admit that when Brian became so successful I got a little bit frightened. It seemed too good to last.”
Well, of course, as we all know it didn’t last.
Queenie Epstein lost husband and son within six weeks of each other in 1967 and she has never been the same woman since.
Lost husband and son
“I was devastated. The life I loved, so busy, exciting, was gone. Just like that. Life was empty. There was nothing. For a time I had been everybody’s favourite person. Life went on but it didn’t seem to need me any more. Friends told me time would heal but it doesn’t. As time passes it only gets worse.” she said looking at the pictures of Brian and his father which stand beside her favourite chair.
If anything rouses Mrs. Epstein to anger these days, it is talk of the fortune her son was alleged to have left.
“When he died, I was so shocked I didn’t think about the money,” she said. “I suppose you could say he was a millionaire, if you count the value of his houses and their contents, but not in cash. His wealth was greatly exaggerated. It was ludicrous really. Death duties took practically all his estate and there is hardly anything left of all that wonderful achievement. Sometimes I think it doesn’t seem right but then I think what does it matter. Nothing can make up for him not being here.”
Happier to talk about the singers her son managed, Mrs. Epstein said: “They were all wonderful. The first time we met the Beatles it was at the Floral Hall, Southport. I was very, very impressed and so was Brian’s father. The boys were very polite, and I thought they were charming. John was obviously the intellectual one, while Paul had the charisma. George was the youngest, the quiet one, and Ringo was fun.
“I’d love to see Liverpool put up a statue to them. After all we’ve put up statues to men who have done far less for the city, for the country, but I’m not sure the Beatles would agree with me.”
Today, Mrs. Epstein leads a quiet life. The woman who jetted around America, in 1965, ahead of the Beatles visiting New York, San Francisco, Los Angeles and Las Vegas, discovering that her son’s name was even better known in the States than in Britain, now regards a visit from her three grandchildren as the high spot of her week.
When she is alone, as she often is, it is to music that Queenie Epstein turns for company. She has cassettes of practically every record cut by her son’s artists, and in the singing of the Beatles, Cilla Black - “Brian called her the Edith Piaf of Britian” - and Gerry Marsden, she turns the clock back to the happier days of the Sixties.
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Valentine Flirt Guide
I will add more questions as I go along.
Correct Answers are in Bold.
Newly Updated
Nathaniel
Do you know what my favorite color is?
A. Blue
B. White
C. Yellow
If we went on vacation together, where do you think I would take you?
A. Japan.
B. The United States
C. England.
I have a rather good memory… Do you know what I can remember without any effort?
A. Birthdays
B. The periodic table of elements
C. English irregular verbs
As you already know, I really like to read. Do you know what type of novels I prefer?
A. Historical novels
B. Detective novels
C. Adventure novels
You know that I have very difficult relations with my father… But do you remember his name?
A. Richard
B. Henry
C. Francis
I’m getting more and more attached to my little Birman… Do you remember the name I gave her?
A. Duchess
B. White
C. Carla
If I tell you we’re going on a trip for the weekend… What activities would we do together?
A. Movies and a restaurant, classic but romantic.
B. Visit a city that’s full of History, because immersing in the culture is better when you’re two.
C. A concert and then a club for a festive moment.
For me, an ideal relationship is:
A. Share our passions and hobbies… It’s important that we learn each other.
B. Have a passionate bond type of relationship: we don’t call it “better half” for no reason.
C. Make plans: if we don’t make plans for the future, the relationship is worthless.
Do you remember when we first met? You were all over the place! Tell me one thing you didn’t forget for your registration.
A. A photo ID.
B. Enrollment fee.
C. A photocopy of my last report card.
There’s a particular quality I appreciate in a girl
A. Intelligence.
B. Altruism
C. Openness.
In my family, most of us have allergies… Do you know what I’m allergic to?
A. To milk
B. To casts
C. To pollen
When you first arrived, you and my sister were feuding. I gave you advice on how to scare her…
A. You told me she was afraid of spiders
B. You told me to let her believe that she could be expelled from school.
C. You told me to give her a box of laxatives.
I find a girl more elegant when she wears
A. Stilettos
B. A pencil skirt
C. A cute purse
Since I met you, Melody seems very attached to me… Do you know what I really think of her?
A. She’s kind of a suck up, but deep down you appreciate her.
B. She annoys you, so you avoid her as much as possible.
C. You’re indifferent towards her. You don’t even see her.
I was almost in big trouble when Amber stole those exams… Do you remember why?
A. The principal accused you of being an accomplice. It’s normal, because she’s your sister.
B. To seal the exams the key to the teachers’ lounge had to be stolen. And you were the only student who had a spare.
C. Because you fell asleep even though you were supposed to watch the teachers’ lounge.
Castiel
I remember when you arrived at the high school… I was even wearing my favorite rock band t-shirt. Do you remember the band’s name?
A. Winged Skull
B. Skull and Roses
C. Gloomy Skull
There’s something I love eating when I’m spending the day at the beach…
A. Churros!
B. Italian Ice Cream!
C. Donuts!
If I had to choose an artistic workshop… What would it be?
A. Photography
B. Painting
C. Sculpting
> Actually that’s not entirely true. Sure it’s the right answer. But in episode 29 Castiel says (on his route) he wanted to be in the video workshop.
Sometimes, when I think of Deborah, I ask myself how I was able to believe all her lies… And that idiotic nickname she gave me…
A. I remember very well, it was “Kitten”.
B. I remember very well, it was “Dear”.
C. I remember really well, it was “Kitty”.
I love when a girl wears.
A. Low cut tops.
B. Bare back tops.
C. Short Shirts.
I don’t get along with many people in this high school, that’s not a secret. Although, there’s a girl I have always found cool. If she needs my help, I don’t hesitate.
A. You’re talking about Violette.
B. You’re talking about Iris.
C. You’re talking about Amber.
The character trait I prefer in a girl:
A. Openness.
B. Assurance.
C. Courage.
If I tell you I’m taking you somewhere on vacation, where would it be in your opinion?
A. New York
B. San Francisco
C. Las Vegas
Do you know what my astrology sign is?
A. Aries
B. Taurus
C. Leo
Right now, the most I can consider with a girl is:
A. Move in with her.
B. Introduced her to your parents.
C. Have a long distance relationship.
I wasn’t really thrilled when we had to act in the play in front of our parents… But there was a play that I particularly disliked more than the others, what was it?
A. Little Red Riding hood
B. Alice in Wonderland
C. Sleeping Beauty
If there’s something that relaxes me the most after classes, it’s walking my dog. By the way, do you know his breed?
A. A German Shepherd!
B. A Rottweiler!
C. A Beauce Shepherd!
The entire high school knows that Amber is head over heels for me… Do you know how long it’s been?
A. Since you were little.
B. Since middle school.
C. Since I arrived at Sweet Amoris.
I don’t know if you’re aware, but I didn’t always have red hear… Before my hair was…
A. Black
B. Blond
C. Blue
One time you thought Lysander was a ghost that was haunting the high school, haha! By the way, after doing some snooping, you found out something about me… Do you remember what it was?
A. Sometimes, you hide in the basement to smoke.
B. Sometimes, you isolate yourself to read Lysander’s texts from his notebook.
C. Sometimes, you go to the basement alone to play the guitar.
Lysander
If we went on vacation together… Where would we go?
A. Iceland
B. Thailand
C. Ireland
When I saw you the first time, it was rather funny… You took me for…
A. A teacher
B. A ghost
C. A. thief
My partner is science class is more and more friendly these days. Do you know who I’m talking about?
A. It’s Capucine.
B. It’s Iris.
C. It’s Peggy.
You noticed that my style is a bit particular. What kind of style do I have?
A. You have a gothic style.
B. You have a steampunk style.
C. You have a Victorian style.
I try to be present for my mom as much as possible these days. Do you remember her name?
A. Gissele
B. Germaine
C. Josiane
If we went to the movies, what kind of movie would I propose we watch?
A. A romantic drama
B. An independent film
C. A period piece
I’m not really good at taking care of an animal… However there are some I have great affection for. Which are?
A. Rabbits
B. Hamsters
C. Guinea pigs
What I like a lot in a girl is:
A. Sincerity
B. Adventurousness
C. Ambition
What do I find that’s particularly elegant on a girl?
A. A floppy necktie
B. A flowy and flared dress
C. A vintage purse
It’s been a while since I last saw Nina… Do you remember when you first met her?
A. Yes, she was pretending to be the president of your fan club… Only, there’s no fan club!
B. Yes, she pretended to be your girlfriend.
C. Yes, she pretended to be your little sister.
I don’t know if you now this, but I really like theater and particularly the big classics. Can you cite one of my favorite playwrights?
A. Edmond Rostand
B. William Shakespeare
C. Jean Racine
Do you remember what my blood type is?
A. O+
B. AB+
C. AB-
You know that I have a tattoo on my back now… What does it represent?
A. It’s a phrase from your favorite author.
B. Set of wings.
C. It’s a tribal tattoo.
During the art day, I participated in the sculpting workshop. What went through your mind then?
A. You were really clumsy, haha! It didn’t surprise me.
B. You were really good for a beginner, it was impressive.
C. You already bad sculpted outside of school, so you were way better than anyone else. Of course.
An ideal relationship for me would be…
A. Two soul mates: it may seem like a cliché but if this belief has existed for so long, it’s because it must have some truth to it.
B. A long term relationship we can only know if we really love someone after years of being with them.
C. A tortured and absolute love, as in all great tragedies…
Armin
I find that I’m rather good at music… Do you remember what instrument I play?
A. You play the drums
B. You play guitar
C. You’re just good at Guitar Hero!
If I could only bring one object with me to live on a desert island, what would it be in your opinion?
A. Your cellphone.
B. A good book.
C. Your game console.
The quality I greatly appreciate in a girl is:
A. Being able to laugh at yourself.
B. Curiosity.
C. Perseverance.
I really like my brother but sometimes he doesn’t make life easy for me… Why?
A. He often asks that you stay with him.
B. He steals your clothes.
C. He’s never there when you need him.
Do you know what my astrology sign is?
A. Scorpio
B. Libra
C. Gemini
You know, I think my mom likes you… Do you remember her name?
A. Elena
B. Moira
C. Victoria
What do I find hot on a girl?
A. Glasses
B. Ripped jeans
C. A good girl dress
I love playing with the ferret I adopted. Do you know its name?
A. Demon
B. Link
C. Rocket
Since I’ve been at this high school, I’ve become really close to certain guy in class. Do you know who it is?
A. It’s Nathaniel
B. It’s Castiel
C. It’s Kentin
What area of the high school do I dislike the most?
A. The garden
B. The library
C. Science class
In your opinion, what’s an ideal weekend I would spend with my girlfriend?
A. A weekend to geek out and watch movies.
B. A weekend at the Japan Expo.
C. A weekend spent visiting Disney studios.
For me, an ideal relationship would be…
A. A game of cat and mouse, once we’re certain of how the other feels about us, it gets boring. x
B. “Carpe Diem”, seize the day and live worry free.
C. A passionate relationship, when you’re a couple you have to share a maximum of things.
You’re starting to know me quite well… In love, how am I exactly?
A. Shy
B. Forward
C. Out of it
Do you know what I think about Star Wars?
A. You think it hasn’t aged well
B. You’re a fan!
C. You find it too commercial.
In your opinion, what do I prefer eating?
A. Burgers
B. Pizza
C. Salad
Kentin
Since military school, I’ve gotten quite involved in sports! Today, there are two sports I’m involved in, which are they?
A. Basketball and running.
B. Soccer and weight lifting.
C. Swimming and long jump.
There’s a quality I love in a girl…
A. Kindness
B. Spontaneity
C. Humor
Do you know who my best friend is?
A. Alexy
B. Armin
C. Nathaniel
I was so sad to leave you when I left for the military school… Do you remember, I had given you something…
A. Yes, cookies, like usual.
B. Yes, a bouquet of flowers, it was super nice!
C. Yes, a cute teddybear.
I’m so happy to have gotten rid of my glasses. Do you know what I did so I wouldn’t have to keep wearing them?
A. You got laser treatment.
B. You wear contacts.
C. By wearing glasses your sight was corrected.
Do you know how the relationship with my father has evolved?
A. It was difficult at first, but now you’re starting to understand each other better.
B. You’re very close, but since military school, he’s been distant.
C. It has never been easy. You thought going to military school would help you get along better, but it’s not the case.
During the art day, I was put in the sewing workshop. Do you remember what my reaction was?
A. You were happy. Your mother taught you to sew, so you already had prior knowledge.
B. You didn’t care. No matter the group, what mattered is that you didn’t have to go to class!
C. You were upset. It was exactly the group you didn’t want to be in.
I was kind of all over the place when I came back from military school… I kissed a girl I didn’t like.
A. I remember… It was Amber.
B. I remember… It was Melody.
C. I remember… It was Charlotte.
If I tell you that I’m taking you on a trip for the weekend… What destination would you bet I take you to?
A. A cozy mountain lodge.
B. A luxurious and romantic hotel room.
C. An isolated but comfortable cabin perched up in the trees.
In your opinion, do I like animals?
A. No, you’re afraid of them.
B. Yes, they have a way of bringing out your protective side.
C. They don’t bother you, but you don’t really want to adopt one.
For a romantic activity, I would like to try…
A. Rafting! It’s sporty, but you need to be tightly knit.
B. A spa. Nothing better than relaxing together.
C. A night out at the theater. That changes things up a bit.
How do I imagine an ideal relationship to be like:
A. Kinetic: you have to share as many things together as possible.
B. “Run from me and I’ll chase after you, chase after me and I’ll run from you,” It’s not fun to have everything right away.
C. Carpe diem: Seize the day without any worries.
What clothing item I think is super sexy on a girl.
A. A mini skirt
B. Tight pants
C. Wedges
There’s a guy at the high school I can’t stand… In the beginning, I was even scared of him, even though now it’s no longer the case… Who do you think it is?
A. Nathaniel
B. Castiel
C. Lysander
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32. Death Song
Hey,
here is another new chapter!
I hope you like it although it’s very sad I guess.
Thank you for reading and liking what I create in my head!
Have a nice weekend!
_______________
October
Two days later my grandmother died.
Five days ago I took the next flight back to LA where she was in hospital and already in coma. When I arrived at LAX my brother picked me up from the airport and we drove directly to the hospital. We didn’t speak any word while driving. I guess we both didn’t find the words to say. I looked very messy because I was still wearing these clothes from the night before. I didn’t even shower. I felt ugly and sad.
My parents and Maggie were waiting at the hospital when we arrived. On our way to her room Marc told me roughly what happened. She had some heart disease for years but it seems that she was living well with it. She saw her doctor on a regular basis and even in LA she found a doctor she saw. But one week ago she didn’t feel well. Her doctor said it would be better if she would go to the hospital to have a check up. No one knew what happened here but her condition deteriorated. She started talking polish, she never did it but she was raised in Poland. My family didn’t understand a word. Then, when Marc called me five days ago in the middle of the night she fell into a coma and on October 3rd, she died at the age of 89. I knew that she had a great life. She accomplished so much in her life and she was always such a positive person. I was happy so share the last months with her in my hometown but I regret that I didn’t visit her more often in the last years. Even when I was studying in Berlin I only visited her twice in one year. I felt so bad. You start to realize what you lost when it’s already fading away.
My grandmother wanted to be buried in Germany where her husband was buried. So my dad organized everything and we would all fly to Cologne the next week for her funeral. It would be a hard time: long flight, jet lag, funeral. I didn’t know how I should survive it because at the moment I was a crying mess. I didn’t change my clothes in two days. I only stayed in bed and watched some weird sit-coms. I didn’t even watch them, I only wanted to hear the voices in my TV so that I didn’t feel so lonely anymore. Marc had Maggie, my mother had my father but who was with me? I knew that I had friends and I called them and yesterday Jacob tried to cheer me up and listened to me but today I was all alone in my small apartment. I guess I never felt so lonely in a long time.
I was looking at the pictures I took with my grandmother in the last months. I was so happy that she lived here the last months of her life. That’s what she wanted – to be close to her loved ones. Maybe she knew that she would die soon? Sometimes people know it. Maybe she felt happier here in LA. I didn’t know.
The picture I took in Las Vegas where she accompanied me to Josh’s concert caught my eye. She was smiling so bright and so was I. We looked so happy in the photograph. She liked taking selfies at that night. I also saw the pictures she took with Chad and Flea. She really felt like a fangirl at that night. I guess it made her very happy going to this concert.
When I was still starring at the picture of my grandma and me I almost forgot that Josh was the one who took all the other pictures of her and me. The last picture from that day showed our three. Josh, my grandma and me. We were standing in front of the Fontains of Bellagio, all smiling. Josh had the longest arm so he had to take the picture. It was a bit fuzzy but I could see the happiness in our faces at that day. When I realized that I lost both of them I started crying and couldn’t stop.
“We keep this love in a photograph
We make these memories for ourselves
Where our eyes are never closing
Our hearts were never broken
And time's forever frozen still.”
(Ed Sheeran - Photograph https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSDgHBxUbVQ)
Just when I was about to stop crying I realized that it was Josh’s birthday when grandma passed away. I didn’t notice it because I was living like in a trance since Marc’s phone call. I didn’t congratulate him. Not because I didn’t want to but because I didn’t think about his birthday. My grandma died on that day so I guess this date will always be in my memory connoted with negative feelings.
Although I didn’t want to leave my apartment for like the next two years I had to. I couldn’t get away from work and I guess it was a good try to distract me from my feelings. I told my boss about what happened because I wanted to have a day off in the next week so I could fly to Germany. She understood and agreed. I felt a bit relieved.
When I was sitting in the faculty lounge correcting some essays my students wrote a voice interrupted me.
“Hey, you are Eileen, am I right?”
“Uhm, yes” I looked up from my desk and saw a new face. It was a new teacher who started working at our school just a few weeks ago. I didn’t know his name.
“Sorry I didn’t want to interrupt your work” he said.
“No…it’s….it’s okay, I’m almost done”
“Honestly, I was surprised that there is still a mate here at 4:50pm. I thought everyone was already at home” he laughed.
“I had to do some work” I told him.
“Yeah me too” he said. “I guess I replaced you from being the new teacher here” he laughed.
“Seems like you did” I said while packing my bag. “I’ll leave now” I let him know before leaving the room.
“Yes me too” he said and followed me until we arrived at the street. I knew it wasn’t his fault because he only started making small talk but I wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone.
“What do you teach?” he asked me.
“History and German”
“Wow, really? German is a very difficult language, isn’t it? Did you study it?”
“No….I was actually born there and raised in English and German”
“Oh wow….when did you move to the US?”
“When I was three”
“Cool…I was born in England. But I moved here for studying and stayed”
Yes, there was a bit of a British accent in his voice I noticed.
“By the way I’m Adam” he said and we shook hands.
“I don’t want to bother you but I thought maybe we could have a coffee some day? I’m new in LA and I just want to get to know some people and since we seem to be the only teacher in the same age at the school I thought maybe we could have a coffee. Only if you want….I don’t want to bother you I just want to connect with people, you know”
I looked at his black curls he had in his hair. He reminded me of someone but I didn’t know who it was.
“Well” I sighed.
“Only if you want” he repeated and smiled. I thought about the last days I spent with crying and talking to Lara on Skype. It was like she was the only one who understood my pain. Sure there was Jacob who listened to me, there was Molly with whom I phoned yesterday and who told me that Eric and her are always there for me. But to me it felt like no one really understood me. So maybe I should have a few nice hours talking to a mate who doesn’t know what happened to me?
“Sure, why not” I finally said to him.
“Cool, what about Tuesday? Right after work?”
“Yes” I faked a smile and went to my car.
It’s crazy how there a phases in your life when you just function. You don’t want to go to work, meet friends, go to the grocery store, clean your house. But you have to. Survival mode. I think I didn’t experience it before like in the last days. I talked a lot with my brother and with my parents. My mother was so sad she cried the whole day and couldn’t organize anything for the funeral. I’ve never seen her like that before. She lost her mother and I guess there is no comparable pain.
When I left school today I almost forgot that I agreed to meet Adam for a coffee. So I drove home, changed my clothes into more comfortable clothes and drove to the café he picked.
I was a bit late but I hope he wasn’t mad at me. I also hoped he couldn’t see my dried tears.
“Hey, nice to see you” Adam said with a smile on his face when I entered the café. He was already sitting at a table near the window.
“Sorry, didn’t find a parking lot”
“Yeah, the struggle is real” he laughed.
“What do you want to drink?”
“Uhm, I guess….coffee? Although I’m more a tea-person I think today I need coffee”
“Rough day?”
“Rough week” I let him know.
“Sorry to hear that….”
“It’s okay”
“So….how long are you teaching at the school?” he asked me and I started telling him.
While talking and drinking coffee I got to know Adam a little bit more. He was born in Manchester but moved to the US for studying. He studied Maths, Geometry and Sports in San Diego and later moved to San Francisco to work as a teacher. Last year the school had to be closed so he decided to make a move to LA. He didn’t know anyone in the city but he always wanted to go to LA someday. I found it very brave that he did this step.
“It’s just a short story about my life” he laughed and took a sip of his coffee.
“Wow, not everyone would’ve done it”
“I know….but in the end it’s just LA, you know”
“It is!”
“You grow up here?”
“Yes….not Downtown or in Hollywood but in LA”
“I don’t like Hollywood”
“Me neither. It’s not my type of style I guess”
“I prefer Echo Park, Pasadena is also nice…or El Sereno. Have you been there?”
“Yes” I answered. He hit me with El Sereno because my brain automatically started thinking about Josh.
“Sure….you live here for 29 years….sure you were in El Sereno before”
“No I think it’s not. I know many people who never leave their neighborhood”
“Well….you’re right. But obviously you belong to the group of people who do” he grinned.
“Obviously”
“I thought about moving to El Sereno but then I found a nice flat in Echo Park which is great, too”
“It is!”
“Maybe a bit more hipsters”
“I guess they’re coming to El Sereno soon. At least I’ve seen some of them there already”
“You seem to know El Sereno very well. Did you live there?”
“No….no” I said while looking into my empty coffee cup. “But I used to know someone who lives there”
“Oh” Adam said. “Seems that I shouldn’t have started talking about El Sereno”
“It’s okay…it’s totally fine. It’s just….my ex lives there”
“Yep, Adam, you blundered, congratulations” Adam said to himself.
“Totally fine.” I faked a smile and ordered another Latte Macchiato.
“My ex still lives in San Francisco…with her now-fiancé so maybe I know the feeling that you want to avoid talking about the city and everything that has to do with it” he told me.
I was surprised that he was so open with me.
“So you moved after your break up?”
“Yeah….now you got me” he grinned. “Kind of”
“I know this situation. Almost two years ago I moved to Berlin when my relationship was over and my ex decided to bang a 20 year old girl”
“The El Sereno-ex?”
“Oh….no” I laughed. “Sorry….that was another ex. My current ex”
“Okay…”
“Sorry….oh my gosh I must sound like a vamp!”
”No….not at all”
“My now-ex broke up with me in June….so I still try to avoid El Sereno”
“Okay now I got it” Adam laughed. “It’s interesting that one of the first things we’re talking about is our relationship status and our exes”
It felt so good to talk to someone who didn’t know anything about my grandma’s death. We only had a good talk and I think he was a nice and likeable mate.
I was still so heartbroken and sad at the same time. I missed my granny and the weird fact was that my sadness about her passing relieved my broken heart a bit. Sure I was still thinking about Josh sometimes but not so often anymore. Most of the time I missed my granny and wondered if she was at a better place now. I hoped so.
Adam and I spend most of the lunch breaks together and it was quite fun. I was happy that there was someone in my age who I could’ve talked to in the breaks. He was such a funny guy and intelligent. I loved this connection. But he wasn’t my type of guy and if I was honest I didn’t want to date a new guy until next year. I guess I needed a break from guys, dates, sex, love and all this stuff. Just me and my friends, Netflix and some good music. That’s what I needed now.
On Friday my family and I took a flight over to Germany. I think I’ve never cared less about a flight. I wasn’t afraid of the start or the landing. I just didn’t care. Most of the time we were in the plane I was reading or listening to music. I didn’t want to talk to anyone.
When we arrived in Germany it was already evening and rainy. It reminded me of last year when I spend my year in Berlin. I never saw so much rain since I left in March. But this time it felt good. It fitted to our mood. We drove to the hotel and all I did after checking in was watching some TV and finally falling asleep. I woke up in the middle of the night and couldn’t sleep anymore. I wondered what I should do because I was going nuts in my hotel room. So I left the room and went into the sports room. Yes, there was a sports room in our hotel and I tried it at 3:42am in the middle of the night. After one hour of power running on a treadmill I went back to my room, showered and tried to sleep for a few more hours. It worked.
We met at the cemetery the next morning. It was still rainy and cloudy and the weather couldn’t be any better for a funeral I guess. Sure we weren’t the only one at the funeral. There were some friends, neighbors, family members I knew and some I didn’t knew. For some of them we were always the “family that moved to California and since then didn’t give a fuck about the family in Germany” but this was bullshit. My parents cared so much about their uncles, aunts, parents (when they were still alive), sisters and brothers. We were the family who always traveled to Germany every Christmas some years back. We were the family who took a flight over to Germany to be at the wedding of my mother’s cousin. Yes we did. I guess there are not many children who spent most of their childhood in planes flying around the world during the holidays. But we did. And there were still people who were mad at us because my parents chose to move to the US.
After shaking so many hands and looking into so many foreign faces we finally sat down at the little church. The pastor of the church my granny was part of did the mass for her. She went to church very often when she was still able to do it in Cologne.
He mentioned so many facts about her life – some I knew of and some I didn’t knew of. I really tried to stop me from crying but I couldn’t. Marc was the one who was strong while my mother and I couldn’t stop crying. Everytime I was looking at her picture that was shown in the middle of the altar it broke my heart. She was gone now, like, completely gone. Forever.
After the mess we went to the cemetery. There were so many people who came to my granny’s funeral that I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t know that there were so many people who knew her and who obviously cared about her. But this feeling made me happy and maybe one day I could find peace with knowing that she was a good friend for many people, a loving mother and grandmother.
While we were leaving the church “What a wonderful world” by Louis Armstrong was playing in the background and it made me cry so much. This song was so wonderful and sad at the same time. I knew that she loved this song so much. My father was the one who told the church to play it because my granny would’ve loved it.
The rain was so heavy and it was so windy. It just fitted to our current situation. I was so afraid of the moment when my grandma’s casket would be buried into the earth. It broke my heart to see her leaving.
Friends, family members, neighbors, people who knew her took farewell of her. The ladies were throwing some roses to her grave while the men were taking a shovel of soil into it. My family were the last one to do it. When I was standing in front of her grave I couldn’t believe it. I still didn’t recognize that she was gone. But she was. No one could take her back. Never. I clung on my brother’s arm so heavy that he couldn’t move away. I didn’t want to feel alone in this moment. I was so glad that he was there for me, for all of us. It’s like Marc was the only strong person in our family during this hard time although I knew that he was sad as well.
I was looking at all the funeral wreaths and one sentence caught my eye.
“It’s a piece of heaven that you were with us”
It was my family’s wreath. My mother chose this quote from a German song.
When I was turning around I saw a silhouette of a man who I knew. But I couldn’t believe that it would be him. I mean what should he do here? In Germany? How should he know that we were here today?
“Is that Josh?” Marc asked me whispering so that no one could hear him except of me.
“N….no…I don’t think so. What should he do here?” I said with a shivering voice.
“I don’t know” Marc and I went to my parents and Maggie. Noel wasn’t with us, Maggie’s parents took care of him.
“Eileen, is this Josh?” now my father was the one asking and pointed at the guy who was now coming towards us.
I didn’t say anything at all. When the man who looked like Josh came closer I couldn’t believe it. It was him. It was definitely him who was coming closer and closer to us. He wore a black jacket, black pants and was holding a funeral wreath in his hands.
I felt a lump in my throat. My breathing was faster but I tried to stay cool. There was only one question in my mind:
What was he doing here????
When Josh finally was standing right in front of us we all looked at him with different faces. My mother didn’t say anything and just left together with Maggie. My father looked at Josh and I guess I saw him smiling. My brother just starred at him with an angry face.
“Hey….I just wanted to tell you my deepest condolences of losing Elizabeth. She was such a wonderful woman, mother, grandmother….great-grandmother” We heard Josh saying.
“Thank you Josh” my father said and they shook hands which lead into a hug.
Marc didn’t say anything he just looked at Josh before he went away to our car.
“I think you’re the only person I wouldn’t have expected here today” my father said to Josh.
“I know….”
“How comes that you’re here?”
“My grandma told me about Elizabeth’s passing and we decided to send a wreath but since I’m in Europe at the moment I thought I could bring it here by myself…” Josh told us before he went to the grave and put the wreath on to it. It was already buried. When I saw the inscription of the wreath I wanted to cry.
“The birds they sang
At the break of day
Start again
I heard them say
Don't dwell on what
Has passed away
Or what is yet to be.
Love,
Adelaide & Josh Klinghoffer”
Why? Why did he have to do it? Why this quote from Leonard Cohen? Why was he always the one finding the best and emotional quotes that brought me to tears? Why?
When he came back my father slapped his shoulder before leaving the cemetery.
There we were. Just the two of us. In the middle of an almost dark cemetery in the pouring rain.
“I’m so sorry Eileen….honestly. I was shocked when my grandma told me the news” Josh said and it was the first time he looked into my eyes.
“Thank you….”
“I don’t know what to say. I’m not good in finding the right words in a situation like that, as you might know. But I just wanted to tell you that I’m very sorry”
“Thanks Josh” I said and now it was the first time that I was looking into his eyes. He didn’t look well. He looked very tired and was very thin.
It was the first time since the middle of June that we saw each other. It was four months ago.
“Should we go back to your family?” Josh asked me. I nodded and so we went through the dark and lonely cemetery without saying anything.
When we arrived at the streets I saw my parents, Marc and Maggie waiting in front of our rental car. I knew that they would drive to the memorial ceremony but right now I had the feeling that I couldn’t attend it. I just couldn’t. I couldn’t stand all the other family members asking dumb questions and maybe even starting a discussion who cared about her the most. So I looked at Marc and I guess he knew so they drove away without me.
“What are they doing?” Josh asked me.
“They’re going to the Memorial Ceremony in her favorite café”
“And what about you?”
“I just can’t….I can’t stand the people” I said to him.
“Are you sure?”
“Yes I am…..”
“Really?”
“Yes Josh!” I let him know and went a few steps away from him. I couldn’t stand his closeness and I couldn’t even stand his appearance. Why did he have to come to the funeral? Why?
Sure it was a cute gesture and very kind of him to put a funeral wreath by him and Adelaide at my granny’s funeral in Germany but why did he have to appear himself? Couldn’t he just send it? Like any other person?
I started walking through the rain. Josh was following me. Why didn’t he just leave?
“What are you doing?” he asked me.
“I’m taking the subway to the city”
“Okay….me too!” he let me know.
So a few minutes later we were sitting in the subway without talking. I looked out of the window and tried to avoid looking at him. But I could feel his gaze on me.
When we arrived in the city I went straight forward to the Rhine. I just wanted to sit here and watch the Rhine. Like I did when I was 16 and spent my whole summer at my grandma’s house in Cologne.
“Eileen, it’s raining….do you really wanna sit here?”
“YES!” I let him know. My voice sounded angry because I was angry. Angry at the people at the funeral, angry at the rain, angry at my grandma for passing away and angry at Josh. Why did he have to attend the funeral?
“Okay so….uhm my hotel is right over there so then….goodbye” he said to me. I didn’t look at him but when he left I gazed after him until he entered the hotel.
I was sitting in the rain, an umbrella in my hand and watched the water in the Rhine. Sometimes ships crossed it. There weren’t many people walking around because of the weather. But a homeless guy sat next to me for a few minutes and drank his coffee. He grinned at me and wished me a good day before he left. I gave him some money for buying something to eat. He thanked me with a smile and left.
I remembered the summer 12 years ago when I spent the whole summer vacation with my grandma in Cologne. I wasn’t on my own, my parents also traveled to Germany for the summer. But while they were doing a roadtrip through the country I wanted to stay in Cologne. I loved this city at that time. It was so unlike LA. While my hometown in California was very big, shiny, glamorous, loud, hot and hectic Cologne was smaller but also a big city. It was separated by the Rhine and people where celebrating carnival for weeks and were going crazy here. I remembered visiting the chocolate museum with my granny, walking along the Rhine with her, she told me many stories from her own youth in the city. She also told me about her life in the USA when she was a young woman. She told me how she fell in love with my grandpa. It was a hard time but they always believed in their love. I wished I could say the same about my love life. Maybe I stopped believing in it.
I was listening to some music when this special song was playing in my phone. It was the song Josh and his grandma quoted on their funeral wreath. He showed it to me last year and I fell in love with the song immediately. I knew he loved Leonard Cohen and he often teased some of his songs on tour. It was so typical for him that he took a song by Cohen to quote on the wreath.
“The birds they sang
at the break of day
Start again
I heard them say
Don't dwell on what
has passed away
or what is yet to be.
Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That's how the light gets in.”
(Leonard Cohen - Anthem https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDTph7mer3I)
After sitting here for quite some time – which felt like hours – I decided to get up. I was freezing so much and although I had an umbrella my jeans and my shoes were very wet. Before taking the subway to my hotel I thought about my conversation with Josh. I felt terrible for treating him like that. I didn’t really speak with him. I felt sorry for it but it wasn’t easy for me. I think it was so surprising and shocking for me seeing him at the funeral. No one expected HIM.
Maybe I should apologize to him? When would we see each other again? Now we were staying in the same city on a foreign continent. Crazy situation.
So when passing the hotel he was staying in I decided to do it. I wanted to apologize for my dismissing behavior. I didn’t want to talk with him about our break up. I only wanted to apologize for today.
I entered the hotel and when I just wanted to ask the lady at the information for his room he was standing next to me.
“What are you doing here?” he asked me.
“I wanted….wanted to apologize for my behavior. I treated you terrible. I didn’t want to be bitchy”
“It’s okay….you have a hard time right now”
“Yes….”
I noticed his hand on my shoulder and looked at it. He took it away immediately.
“So uhm, why are you even here in Cologne?” I asked him.
“We’re having a TV show tomorrow in Brussels. But today is an off day. So I decided I should take the opportunity to go to your granny’s funeral”
I looked at him. He looked so tired and kind of sick. I really hoped he was feeling well.
“Thanks…” I whispered. “I have to go now I guess I…” I heard myself saying. But suddenly I felt dizzy. I saw black wholes. What was going on?
“Is everything okay?” Josh asked me.
“My head is spinning” I told him.
“Come on, sit down here” he told me, put my hand and walked me to a chair.
“Can we have some water please?” I heard him asking the lady at the information. She gave it to him and I took a few sips.
“I think you have a hard time now. It’s totally okay to feel ill and sad” Josh said to me. I nodded.
“Maybe it’s the jet lag” I agreed.
“Could be.” he looked into my eyes and I had the feeling that the world stopped for a moment. Argh, I hated this feeling. When does it stop?
“I….I have to go now” I said and got up from the chair. But when I got up my head was spinning again.
“Eileen, are you sure you wanna leave now? Where is your hotel?” Josh asked me.
“It’s….it’s like 30 minutes from here with the subway”
“Please….do me a favor and stay a little longer here. You don’t look well”
“I know….” I sighed and realized that I started crying. I couldn’t stop it. It was just running down my face.
I noticed Josh’s arms around me and I laid my head against his chest to cry. Oh well, how deep did I fall?
“You know….maybe you should take some rest” he said after a while and took my hand. We went to the elevator and finally arrived at his hotel room.
“If you want you can sleep in my bed for a few hours. I think you aren’t able to drive to your hotel at the moment” he suggested.
I couldn’t say anything against it because I felt so tired. So I sat down at his bed, took off my shoes and tried to make myself comfortable in the bed. It smelled like him. Josh was sitting in a chair and looked at me.
“Do you want something to drink?”
“No thanks” I let him know. My voice sounded so weak. “I don’t need anything”
“Okay….I’ll let you sleep. I read a book in the meantime” he told me before I fell asleep.
It was already dark outside when I woke up. I was a bit confused until I realized where I was. Josh was still sitting in the chair but instead of reading he was working on his computer.
“What time is it?” I asked a bit panic.
“You’re awake” Josh smiled. “It’s 10pm. Are you feeling better?”
“A bit” I let him know. “I’m hungry”
“Should we order something? Or should I get us something to eat?” he suggested.
“No….no it’s not necessary I guess. I’ll leave now” I said while getting up from the bed but at the same moment I sat down again. My head was still spinning.
“Are you sure I shouldn’t call a doctor?”
“No….it’s okay. I just….”
“You’re going nowhere until you’ve eaten something!” Josh told me with a determining voice. “What about pizza?”
30 minutes later we were sitting on his hotel bed eating pizza. He still knew my favorite: tomatoes, rocket and mozzarella. I loved it. Josh preferred a salami pizza.
“Thank you so much for this pizza” I said with my mouth full.
“You don’t have to thank me” he chuckled. “I was also very hungry and wanted to eat pizza”
“Okay well….whatever thanks for everything”
“Sure….you’re welcome”
Silence.
We still didn’t talk about what happened four months ago. We got both one year older since then but seems like we both didn’t want to speak about our break up.
“So….how does it feel to hit the 35?” I asked him just to start a conversation.
“Like 34 why?”
“Just….just a question. Some people say it’s kind of a rock you hit like 30 or 40”
“30 was the worst” he laughed.
“Now I’m afraid”
“You don’t have to be afraid. You still look like 25” he smiled at me. “One of the most beautiful women I know”
“Don’t say that!”
“Why? It’s just the truth. You should know that”
“But….”
“No but Eileen. Believe me. You’re beautiful even with some pizza in your mouth corner” he grinned and wiped it away. Our eyes met each other and I couldn’t look away. For a moment it felt like last year when we had our first kiss.
Suddenly I felt his lips on mine. His lips tasted like salami pizza and I could felt his breath so close to me. It really felt like coming home to me but after a few seconds I realized that I couldn’t do it. I pushed him away.
“Sorry….I….I can’t” I let him know. I couldn’t look at him. He was so sweet to me and I behaved like a bitch.
“It’s okay….I didn’t want to take you by surprise and I don’t even know why I did it” he said.
“Can we….can we just sit here and….just sit here” I sighed.
“Yes of course we can.” Josh said and made himself comfortable next to me. After a few minutes of silence between us he started asking. “What did your granny die of?”
It hit me that he changed to this heavy topic but at the same moment I realized that maybe it’s good to talk about it with someone instead of bottling up.
“She had a heart disease for several years and suddenly it got more serious. I don’t know why. I wasn’t in LA when it happened”
“Where were you?”
“I was in New Orleans with Molly. She had this important lecture at the university”
“Oh so you accompanied her?” Josh seemed to be surprised.
“Yes I did. We’re….we’re good friends you know”
“Eric mentioned it….I think he was on tour at that time”
“He was. So Molly and I flew over to New Orleans for two days”
“And you had a great time until you got these shocking news?”
When he asked me this question I remembered the night I spend with this stranger from the bar. What was his name again? Ah right, Dylan.
“Yes….we had” I lied. It was one of the most horrible nights I’ve ever had. “Until Marc called me. But I didn’t answer his calls because I was….kind of busy you know”
“Mhmhm” Josh looked at me. I felt like being caught! That he could read in my eyes that I met a stranger in a bar and had a one night stand. But….who cares? I mean, he had his fun as well. So why shouldn’t I have fun, too?
“And then?” he asked and I realized that my mind went a bit absent in the last seconds.
“Well uhm….yeah I called him back and he told me that she was going to die so I took the next flight to LA and….two days later she died” I said without showing any emotions. It was so weird. I could talk about it without feeling anything but when I started thinking about her it brought me to tears.
“On my birthday” Josh noted.
“Yes….” I sighed.
“Such a horrible day” he said.
“Your birthday?”
“Yeah”
“Why?”
“Uhm….I don’t know. It was a bad day but I don’t want to moan. I mean, your granny died on that day so I don’t want to lament that my birthday was such a bad day”
“No it’s okay….what….what happened?”
“You know….just life” he answered and looked at his computer. “Do you want to watch a movie?”
“I don’t know….I think I should go back to my hotel. It’s already late” I let him know and took my phone to call a cab.
Josh was looking at me with a weird face when I was talking to the woman from the cab office on the phone. He didn’t understand my German so it must’ve looked very weird gesticulating and talking in German.
“So….I officially hate Cologne” I told him when I hung up.
“Why?”
“The next cab will be available in 1.5 hours!”
“What about the subway?”
“It takes me like 30 minutes and I don’t know if I can do it on my own in my situation now”
“I can accompany you”
“No….you don’t have to. I can call Marc, he can pick me up”
“Or you just sit down, watch a movie and then you can take the cab” Josh suggested. I didn’t know why but I agreed.
Josh started a movie with Tom Hanks and I think after a few minutes I fell asleep again. When I woke up it was already the middle of the night. His computer was snapped shut and when I turned around I saw him lying next to me in the bed. But it felt like there was a kind of a wall of blankets between us. I watched him sleeping for a while and noticed his phone he was still holding in his hands. He looked so cute.
I went to the bathroom and looked into the mirror. Eileen, what are you doing here? You’re spending the night with your ex in a hotel room in Cologne! Although all you want to do is crying. I was so overwhelmed by my feelings. It was too much for me. I wanted to cry but at the same time I felt a bit happy being in Josh’s closeness.
What was wrong with me? Why did I push him away when he kissed me? It felt so real to me but at the same time it reminded me of all the good times we shared and I had to think about grandma and then I started crying again. That’s why I pushed him away. I couldn’t believe it anyway.
When I came back from the bathroom I wanted to lay myself a bit closer to Josh but at the same moment I noticed his phone screen flashing. I saw an incoming message from….Chloe. Although I didn’t want to read it I couldn’t look away from it. It was seen in his lock screen. And when the screen was already dark I carefully pushed the big button on his phone to read the message again. What did I become?
Sweatheart <3
How are you feeling today? Is it already night in Europe? I don’t know haha. I thought about you and all the crazy little things I want to do with you! ;)
Miss u
Kissssss
Chloe
I guess this was the moment I turned around to the other side of the bed and tried to fall asleep again. If I wouldn’t have been so tired I guess I would have get up and leave immediately but I felt like something retained me.
Obviously I could continue to sleep because when I woke up it was already 11am. I was kind of shocked when I looked at the clock in the hotel room. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and looked to the left, but no one was there. Hm, maybe Josh was in the bathroom. But then I saw a note at the nightstand.
“E….
I’m sorry that I had to go but since we have a TV show today I had to get up very early to drive back to Brussels. The show is tonight but we meet at noon so I have to catch the next train.
It was so great to see you again. I know I wasn’t desired at the funeral at least your brother and your mom treated me like that but….I wanted to say goodbye to your grandma. She was one of the nicest, funniest, smartest and strongest women I’ve ever met. I’m so grateful that I got to know her! You’re such a lucky girl that you had a grandma like her. I bet she watches you and your family in heaven and knows everything about us haha.
Thank you for staying with me. I really wanted to talk to you about some things that happened in the past which I’m sorry for. I know I didn’t tell you the exact reason why I ended our relationship. I’m sorry. But I guess I still don’t know why….I had my reasons. Okay, this sounds terrible. Sorry for that. Truth is, I don’t know. It just didn’t feel real to me anymore. I experienced a lot in the following weeks. Maybe I had to learn it. I’m still feeling confused. I know I shouldn’t because I’m already 35 and I should know what I want in life but truth is – I don’t.
Sorry for my weird words. I wanted to explain to you why I behaved like shit but….I guess I can’t.
You can stay in the hotel room as long as you want. I paid for everything. Breakfast included. Make yourself a beautiful morning in Cologne and don’t feel bad for crying or missing your grandma. It’s totally okay to feel this way even when we’re grown ups because loosing someone you love can break your heart. I know what I’m talking about. I’ve been there before.
Goodbye Eileen,
J”
It kind of brought me to tears to read these words. There he was. The Josh I missed so much. The Josh who thought about himself, criticized himself so much, who always wanted others to feel good and make comfortable. The nicest human on earth I knew.
Before I drown in my own tears I decided to get up and do what Josh wanted me to do. I ordered some breakfast and enjoyed it while looking out of the window with a great view over sunny Cologne. After that I left the hotel and drove back to my “real” hotel where I paid for a room I only used for one night instead of two.
When I came into the lobby my family already waited there to check out.
“Eileen, where were you?” my mother asked me with a surprised face. “I thought you were still in your room. We haven’t seen you at breakfast so we thought you were still sleeping”
“No I wasn’t. I couldn’t sleep so I got up and took a walk through the city” I lied.
“Oh okay, well….but now we have to check out and get to the airport” she said and while she was saying it I noticed my brother’s gaze on me. I guess he knew where I was.
__________
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((A doodle I did of her and a picture of her and her Boyfriend, Alyosha))
Name: Radojka Raznatovic
Aka: Rado, Rads.
Age & Date of birth: Rado is 76 years old, and she says that her birthday is December 26, 1965. She’s a Capricorn.
Species: She is a genetically engineered elf/crow/jaguar hybrid.
Gender: Cis Female
Orientation: She is currently flexible, but she has a boyfriend at the moment.
Fandom/Original: She’s my Original Girl. (She’s based off of Wonder Woman in a way)
Warnings: Body Shaming, Stalking, Bullying, Religion.
Biography: Rado has had a much different life than her brothers. She was adopted by an older couple that worked as Catholic missionaries around the world. They were currently living in Belgrade and they raised her there until she was 4. They then moved to South Africa where they adopted two more children. Rado loved her adoptive siblings, and she was a very helpful child. She did as much as she could to help people and she even attended classes with some of the students.
They stayed there until she turned 13, then the whole family moved to England, where Rado and her sisters attended an all girls highschool. By this time, Rado was different than most girls. She developed early and was much taller than them so they made fun of her, many of the other girls saying that she looked like a boy, calling her ugly and everything. She was a kind girl, so she usually ignored them, but there were days when she would go home crying, telling her parents about what had happened. Her adoptive sisters were different, and they would fight the girls who would make fun of their big sister. The three of them usually got detention where they just had homework to do. This is where Rado’s love of computers came from. She would purposely get herself into trouble so that she could use the computers. Her adoptive parents caught on and for her High School Graduation, they bought her a laptop. She loved it so much, but what she loved the most was taking it apart and enhancing it.
Like her parents, she decided to do Missionary work back in Serbia, Africa and Asia until she turned 20. She moved to America and she had a job working as a sales woman at a department store. They loved her features and she knew how to do makeup real well. She liked this job too, but after a while it was becoming tedious.
She was approached by a woman who told her that she had beautiful features. That she wanted her to be a runway model for clothes that she was designing. That the clothes would look lovely on her. She agreed, and a week later she got her first gig, walking down the runway and everything. She eventually saved up enough money to put herself through college where she worked real hard and she diligently put herself through programs. She graduated, getting herself a Bachelors in Engineering, Masters in Computer Science and a PHD in IT. She took a break and went to volunteer at some churches in Nevada. She was playing with some children when she met a handsome guy with green eyes. His name was Dorijan and she was amazed by how much they favored one another. They got to talking and she was surprised to learn that he was also from Serbia. They thought it was a weird coincidence, so out of curiosity they got DNA tests done. They learned that they were in fact twins who were separated when they were younger. Having met him, Rado felt that she missed out on so much of their life, so they decided to move in with each other.
Dorijan was a nice guy, but she knew that he had some problems with drinking. He was embarrassed to tell her, but she told him that there was no need to be ashamed. She said that we all get into trouble and it’s not a bad thing to ask for help when you need it. She was there for him and they worked on getting him sober.
After a few years, they spent the time looking for a man who looked just like Dorijan. They heard that this man was in Las Vegas, so they went there and sure enough they found him. His name was Mihajlo and he was different. They asked him questions, but he felt that he would answer them only if they helped him with finding a guy who took his girlfriends car. She managed to hack into the traffic cameras and they found his car.
It was years until they heard from him again and it turns out that he got into some trouble. He turned himself into jail for some reason and he wasn’t coming out. Dorijan went to visit him but he wouldn’t say anything.
It was a while before they heard anything, but in the meantime they had a stalker. Someone managed to get into their house and they stole a few things. They were things like Dorijan’s shirts, a couple of her hair ties and a bracelet that she wore. Not really knowing what to do, Dori and Rado got a security system and she set up cameras around their house. That night as she was doing a lesson plan, she caught a glimpse of someone in a hoodie that was on the camera. Whoever it was was standing outside and watching the camera. They didn’t move for a long while, so she called Dori and he saw them too. They went to the top floor and he was about to shoot them, but they left in a hurry. Dori managed to get Miha out of jail and their brother managed to help them.
The next night, Miha and Dori were outside looking for the person. Rado gave Miha a tip and luckily she was right. Just as Dori was going to go around the corner, Miha ran and tackled the person that was after them. They fought them for a while until Dorijan managed to shoot this person in the leg. Miha tackled the person again, this time knocking them out. He tied the person up and they brought them inside.
They were shocked to see that the person looked like a corrupted and just wrong version of Miha. Whoever he was he was pissed and he told them that Viktor was looking for them. That he was there to kill them all. The person, being stronger than them managed to get free and he attacked Rado. Miha punched him so hard that they were sure that he killed the man. Rado was okay, a bit scratched up but okay. The two brothers took the person and buried them outside.
Four days later, Rado was home alone when she heard a noise. She went to the back yard and was shocked to see that the guy was back, but something about him was different. He had no memory of how he got there or what had happened. He remembered bits and pieces f information. She explained everything to him and he was appalled. He apologized for attacking her, she forgave him and in an effort to learn more about him, she rented out a hotel room for him. He thanked her and she went on her way. She went to talk to him everyday before she went to work.
Dorijan thought that she was acting suspicious, so he followed her one day to the hotel. When he saw that she was meeting with the stalker, he was upset. He asked her why and she told him that his name was Luka. He wasn’t himself when he attacked and he was extremely sorry. She was trying to figure out why he looked just like Miha. Dori reluctantly agreed and the two of them would talk to Luka. He was extremely kind which was a contrast to his creepy behavior earlier. They eventually told Miha and even though he was pissed off as usual, Rado assured him that Luka meant no harm.
Luka and Rado are the best of friends and he is extremely protective of his “sister”. She loves talking to him and she trusts him more than anything.
Appearance: Rado is a beautiful woman. She does have has “Raznatovic features” which include a cleft chin, big green eyes, freckles on her face, full lips,black nails, a curved nose, and jet black hair, but her features are slightly softer than her brothers.
She has dark, thick eyebrows that are expressive, a chiseled, almost super hero like face, and straight, white teeth that have pointy canines. Her eyes are happier than her brothers. Her hair is thick and jet black, but it’s usually short or neck length. She has slightly pointed ears that have pairs of earrings in them and she’s usually seen wearing dark lipstick with a bit of eyeliner.
Like her brothers, He’s 6'4 and about 198 lbs of muscle. She lifts weights and she’s not afraid to talk about her body. She’s a size 16 and she says that her legs are her best body part. She is usually seen wearing a heart necklace, the color blue and she likes showing her shoulders. She also wears heels sometimes, which makes her almost 7 feet tall.
Personality: Rado is possibly the nicest of the Raznatovic siblings. She has been described as being the “Mom Friend” and she’s always in a good mood. She doesn’t put up with her older brother’s attitude and she will politely tell him off.
She usually has a positive outlook of life and it’s rare to see her speaking negatively about something. Her biggest conflict with Miha is that he is not forgiving of their real father, while Rado believes that forgiving him will allow Miha to let go of his past. She was not raised by him and she knows what he did to him, and it pains her to see her brother upset.
She’s also really goofy and she’s not afraid of embarrassing herself to make people laugh. She gets along really well with children and she’s usually seen playing with them.
Favorite & Least Favourite things:
Favorite Things: She loves very spicy food, taking things apart, any shade of blue and Reading. She also likes hanging out with her youngest brother and Dorijan.
Least Favorites: She’s not too fond of mushrooms, she hates bullies, she hates when Jace and Miha fight, and she feels bad when she sees her siblings upset.
Strengths and Weaknesses:
Strengths: Like Dorijan, she has extremely enhanced healing abilities and endurance. She is was created with the ability to think faster than a normal human. She also has heightened senses, and super strength, with sight being the strongest of her senses.
Strengths: Her positivity is one of her greatest and most defining traits. She has never let anything bring her down and her positivity runs off of her brothers. She is also a natural peace maker and she will try her hardest to help out.
Weaknesses: Her pacifism and the love that she has for her brothers. She doesn’t want to hurt anyone because she knows that she actually can, so if there is a conflict, she will ignore it or psych herself out of resolving it because she fears that she will cause more trouble.
She loves her brothers, but if they are hurting, it makes her feel bad. She wishes that she could help them with their problems, but they always keep to themselves.
Additional notes:
7 Facts about Radojka!
1. She has a naturally husky, deep voice that’s pretty relaxing to hear. People assume that she’s Dorijan on the phone and she usually buys things for him.
2. She actually created an app that teaches kids about computers, science and programming.
3. If she wanted to, she can fight better than her brothers, but she’s an extreme pacifist.
4. She also has a brand of computers called RR’s. They are small, handmade, notebooks for children and families who live in poverty stricken areas.
5. She is the queen of the “Wink-Point-Tongue Click”.
6. She and her boyfriend have a weird relationship. He is transgender and his name is Alyosha, but they call each other by code names. They act more like two goofy kids than anything.
7. She routinely checks traffic cameras to see what’s going on in Las Vegas.
Specify here whether fanart/fanwork of your OC is alright, please!
I would really like that and thanks if you do so!
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▼ NOW PRESENTING
Name: Damon Ryder Salvatore
Age: 32/177
Birthday: June 18, 1839
Birthplace: Mystic Falls, Virginia
Occupation: Founder and CEO of Mystic Grill
Family: Stefan Salvatore (brother)
Species: Vampire
Playby: Ian Somerhalder
Availability: Open
▼ SPECIES STATISTICS
Vampire
Date turned: December 9, 1871
Killed by: His father
Turned by: Alexia Branson
Bloodline: Unknown
Lapis lazuli: Spelled by unknown witch
▼ SOMETHING WICKED
Damon Salvatore was born and raised in Mystic Falls with his younger brother Stefan Salvatore. Growing up, Damon was a kind guy and very protective of Stefan, doing everything he could to protect his sibling like a big brother should. While Damon’s mother Lilian Salvatore was always very kind, his father tended to be strict and often commanded his two sons. It was very rare for the man to genuinely want to spend time with his children since he was always busy working for the town council as well as keeping his bed warm with women. The only person who knew about his dad’s infidelity was Damon, having witnessed his dad with a variety of females ever since he was sixteen years old. He didn’t want to hurt his mother and Stefan, so he kept his father’s sex life a secret, even though he really didn’t want to protect the man. More often than not, Damon caught his father with women that he worked with, but he also ended up in bed with random females that lived in Mystic Falls. Damon didn’t want his family to fall apart, he wanted them to be happy and together, yet part of him knew that would never happen because his dad was anything but kind and caring. Giuseppe Salvatore rarely showed emotions to anyone, so deep down, Damon knew it would never work out with his family. He kept trying however, never losing hope as the years went on. He hoped that maybe his father would grow tired of his promiscuous behavior and return to his wife and two sons. However, Damon’s mother died of consumption when he was twenty five years old, prompting his father to become even busier when he started to make plans with the town council so that they could rid Mystic Falls of the supernaturals that had showed up there. They wanted to keep their hometown safe and supernatural beings were a threat and not welcome. Damon’s father wanted his two sons to help out since they were both grown men now, with Damon being thirty two and Stefan twenty nine. One night, when Stefan was hunting one of the vampires, he was caught by surprise when said vampire subdued him. That vampire was none other than Alexia Branson, but she wasn’t the bad kind of vampire. When Damon found his brother with Lexi, he begged her to spare Stefan because he couldn’t lose his sibling. Just as Lexi was about to let the two go, Damon’s father made an appearance and misunderstood the situation in front of him. He was convinced that his sons were conspiring with supernaturals, trying to help them escape town. His anger prompted him to shoot all three of them, fatally wounding both his sons while Lexi managed to escape. Giuseppe left both Damon and Stefan to die, even telling them that they deserved to die since they were helping the enemy.
Luckily, Lexi stayed close and fed both brothers her blood in hopes of healing them. Unfortunately, Damon and Stefan died, but they died together, which was a bit of a relief to both of them. After completing his transition, Damon met a young girl who he found himself falling in love with, not knowing that Stefan harbored the very same feelings towards her. Both boys were competing for her affections and wanted her to decide between the two after discovering the truth. Of course, just like Stefan, Damon hoped that her choice would fall on him and he was prepared to do anything to make that happen. One day, Stefan took her to the woods so he could court the girl, trying to increase his chances with the woman of his dreams. It didn’t take long for Damon to stumble upon the two and naturally, the older sibling was upset at what was happening in front of him. Angry about what he had seen and heard, Damon attacked his brother, with the two siblings nearly killing one another. The girl wanted the brothers to stop and interfered, trying to separate them and getting involved in the fight. It was then that Damon accidentally pushed her into a tree branch that had broken off halfway, perforating her right in the chest. Both him and Stefan watched her take her last breath as she died, but before Stefan could launch himself at his brother, Damon fled the scene. Stefan was left to pick up the pieces and bury her since his brother had left and with much pain in his heart, he did so. After that, Damon didn’t see Stefan again and instead, he became the one person that he now despised - his father. Turning into a vampire had changed him and he became the bad parts of his own species. He stopped caring about things, especially about love because that was ruined for him and he preferred sexual relationships instead. Damon never forgave Stefan for what he did to the girl that they both loved, but both brothers ended up in Mystic Falls after years. Just like Stefan, Damon had heard about a cure for vampirism, one that was locked inside a tomb beneath Fell’s church. He wasn’t sure if his brother knew, but he did know that he wanted to beat Stefan to it and returned to Mystic Falls. There, he demanded that Bonnie Bennett used her magic to open the tomb up so he could obtain the cure and shove it down his brother’s throat. Damon still had a lot of resentment towards Stefan, but deep down, the majority of resentment was towards himself since he was the one who had killed the girl they loved. As if that wasn’t bad enough, Damon also ended up killing Lexi, which was another thing that damaged Stefan’s relationship with his brother after their return. Damon’s been in town for years now and has made the place his home again, but he swears that someone’s playing games with him when he sees Elena Gilbert back alive, not knowing it’s really Katherine Pierce.
Stefan Salvatore
Damon used to be very close to Stefan, until they both fell in love with the same girl and Damon accidentally killed her. Stefan’s never forgiven Damon for that and Damon’s never forgiven Stefan for pursuing the same girl. To this day, Damon hasn’t told Stefan that he’s seen their father cheat on their mother more times than he could count, but Stefan did always wonder why Damon became the bad parts of their species. When both brothers returned to town, they wanted the same thing - to obtain the cure for vampirism. Stefan wanted it for Damon, hoping it would make him kind again while Damon wanted to shove it down Stefan’s throat out of spite. They’ve been in town for years now, but their relationship remains on and off - being good on some days while bad on others.
Alaric Saltzman
Damon was the one who killed Isobel, which Alaric attacked him for. Since Damon actually liked Alaric, he didn’t kill the guy. Weirdly enough, the two guys ended up becoming best friends and often have drinks together at Mystic Grill. They have a usual spot at the bar and even though Alaric is human, he does help Damon when needed. Damon helps Alaric in return and has grown rather protective of the guy that’s one of the few friends he has in town.
Logan Steele
Damon met Logan in 1907 in Las Vegas. The two vampires had both been traveling the world and happened to end up in the same place. Both guys spent the entire night in Las Vegas together at various casinos, playing games, having fun, but also feeding. Damon was never told about Logan’s blood lust problem and he himself doesn’t really like blood bags all too much. He’s always been about fresh blood and made sure that his companion also had some during their time in Las Vegas.
Caroline Forbes
Damon has a playful relationship with Caroline, with him enjoying the moments when he gets to tease the girl. Over the years, Damon has grown pretty fond of Caroline and even saved her life at her own birthday party when a group of hunters invaded her home, trying to kill all supernaturals. Luckily, Damon fed Caroline his blood just in time, making sure she came back as a vampire.
Katherine Pierce
Damon has never met Katherine before, so when he sees her in town, he thinks she’s Elena. He’s met Elena once before, back when she had relationship problems with Matt and he knows she died in the Wickery bridge car crash. Maybe she was brought back to life though, right? Or is someone trying to play games with him? Katherine wouldn’t mind playing some games, so she’s all for toying with Damon, letting him believe she’s Elena. She’s studied her doppelganger for a long time and she knows just how to imitate the girl.
Lorenzo St. John
Damon left Enzo to die in the fire back when they had made plans to escape together. He hasn’t seen his former cellmate in years, but now that he’s come to Mystic Falls, Enzo plans to pay Damon a visit sometime soon. Damon still thinks that Enzo died in that fire, so he has no idea that the guy is still alive, or that he was turned by Damon’s very own mother.
Wesley Thompson
Wes thought that Damon had something to do with his parents dying, so he attacked the vampire. However, Damon was a lot stronger than Wes, meaning that it didn’t take long for him to overpower the werewolf. Luckily, Bonnie showed up just in time to save Wes from Damon, saving his life.
▼ PLOT || CHARACTERS || APPLY || FAQ/ASK
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NEW YORK | Joe Jackson, patriarch of musical Jackson family, dies at 89
New Post has been published on https://is.gd/QNSLSs
NEW YORK | Joe Jackson, patriarch of musical Jackson family, dies at 89
NEW YORK (AP) — Joseph Jackson, the fearsome stage dad of Michael Jackson, Janet Jackson and their talented siblings, who took his family from poverty and launched a musical dynasty, has died. He was 89.
Clark County Coroner John Fudenberg told The Associated Press that Joe Jackson died at 2:55 a.m. on Wednesday at Nathan Adelson Hospice in Las Vegas.
Fudenberg said he did not have full details, and a determination was not immediately made about whether his office would handle the case.
“We are reviewing the circumstances surrounding the death, but there is no reason to believe it’s anything other than a natural death,” the coroner said.
Jackson was a guitarist who put his own musical ambitions aside to work in the steel mills to support his wife and nine children in Gary, Indiana. But he far surpassed his own dreams through his children, particularly his exceptionally gifted seventh child, Michael. Fronted by the then-pint-sized wonder and brothers Jermaine, Marlon, Tito and Jackie, the Jackson 5 was an instant sensation in 1969 and became the first phase of superstardom for the Jackson family. Over the following decades, millions would listen to both group and solo recordings by the Jackson 5 (who later became known as The Jacksons) and Michael would become one of the most popular entertainers in history.
Michael Jackson’s estate released a statement mourning the death.
“We are deeply saddened by Mr. Jackson’s passing and extend our heartfelt condolences to Mrs. Katherine Jackson and the family. Joe was a strong man who acknowledged his own imperfections and heroically delivered his sons and daughters from the steel mills of Gary, Indiana, to worldwide pop superstardom,” said John Branca and John McClain, co-executors of the estate.
“Papa Joe,” as he would become known, ruled through his stern, intimidating and unflinching presence, which became so indelible it was part of black popular culture, even referenced in song and on TV.
“This is bad, real bad Michael Jackson, Now I’m mad, real mad Joe Jackson,” Kanye West rhymed in Keri Hilson’s 2009 hit, “Knock You Down.”
Michael and other siblings would allege physical abuse at their father’s hands.
“We’d perform for him and he’d critique us. If you messed up, you got hit, sometimes with a belt, sometimes with a switch. My father was real strict with us — real strict,” Michael Jackson wrote in his 1985 autobiography, “Moonwalk.”
LaToya Jackson would go as far as to accuse him of sexual abuse in the early 1990s, when she was estranged from her entire family, but she later recanted, saying her former husband had coerced her to make such claims. She and her father later reconciled.
By the time they were adults, most of the Jackson siblings had dismissed him as their manager; Michael and Joseph’s relationship was famously fractured; Michael Jackson revered his mother, Katherine, but kept his distance from Joseph.
However, during some of his son’s most difficult times, including his 2004 molestation trial, Joseph was by his side, and Michael acknowledged their complicated relationship in a 2001 speech about healthy relationships between parents and their children:
“I have begun to see that even my father’s harshness was a kind of love, an imperfect love, to be sure, but love nonetheless. He pushed me because he loved me. Because he wanted no man ever to look down at his offspring,” he said. “And now with time, rather than bitterness, I feel blessing. In the place of anger, I have found absolution. And in the place of revenge I have found reconciliation.
And my initial fury has slowly given way to forgiveness.”
In his autobiography, Joseph Jackson acknowledged having been a stern parent, saying he believed it was the only way to prepare his children for the tough world of show business. However, he always denied physically abusing his children.
Joseph Walter Jackson was born in Fountain Hill, Arkansas, on July 26, 1928, the eldest of four children. His father, Samuel Jackson, was a high school teacher, and his mother, Crystal Lee King, was a housewife.
The couple split up when Jackson was 12. He moved with his father to Oakland, California, while his mother moved to East Chicago, Indiana. When he turned 18, he moved to Indiana to live near his mother. It was there that he met and married Katherine Scruse.
In the 1950s, he had tried to launch his own music career as a guitarist, but he came to realize the truly gifted musicians in his family were his children.
He launched a group in 1962 that featured his three eldest sons — Jackie, Tito and Jermaine — and two neighbors. He eventually replaced the neighbors with brothers Michael and Marlon, and the Jackson Five went professional in 1966. By 1969, they had signed to Motown, when their bubble gum soul-pop hybrid would create Beatle-like mania, with hits including “I Want You Back,” ”ABC” and “I’ll Be There.”
Michael, who joined the group at age 8, was its showstopper from the beginning. A bright-eyed bundle of energy with a soaring voice and dynamic dance moves, he quickly became the lead singer.
Joe Jackson literally drove his kids to success, taking them around the country looking for singing engagements and recording opportunities.
Randy, the youngest Jackson brother, replaced Jermaine in the mid-1970s when the group left Motown and became The Jacksons at CBS; Jermaine, then married to founder Berry Gordy’s daughter Hazel, stayed behind and launched a solo career.
While Michael’s success as a solo performer would eventually dwarf that of the rest of his family, Janet would become another multiplatinum superstar; Joe Jackson initially managed her career, too, putting her in the Jacksons’ variety show in the early 1970s,
where she charmed with her Mae West routine, and shepherding her acting career on shows like “Good Times.” But soon after she put out “Control,” her breakthrough album at 19, she, too, would sever managerial ties with her father.
In a 2003 interview with Martin Bashir, Michael Jackson teared up when discussing the alleged abuse, saying he would sometimes vomit or faint at the sight of his father because he was so scared of him.
“We were terrified of him. Terrified, I can’t tell you I don’t think to this day he realizes how scared, scared,” said Jackson, who added that his father would only allow him to call him by his first name, not “daddy.”
The alleged abuse wasn’t just physical. Michael Jackson, who drastically changed his face with plastic surgery through the years, talked several times about how his father would mock the size of his once-broad nose, calling him “big nose.”
After Michael’s death, Joseph Jackson sued when it was disclosed that he wasn’t included in Michael’s will. Michael’s mother, Katherine, was given custody of Michael’s three children and the money to support them. But none of the siblings were named as heirs.
Father and son seemed to have reconciled for a time when Michael Jackson was on trial on child molestation charges. His father was in court to lend him support nearly every day, and Michael was acquitted of all counts in 2005. But he left the country and when he returned, they weren’t close.
Toward the end of his life, Michael did not allow his father to visit his Holmby Hills home. Bodyguards said they turned away Joseph Jackson when he appeared at the gate wanting to visit his grandchildren.
By 2005, no longer involved in his children’s careers, Joseph Jackson had launched a boot camp for aspiring hip-hop artists, promoting lyrics without vulgarity and sponsoring competitions for young artists from across the country. He spent most of his time at a home in Las Vegas and traveled the country auditioning talent for the competition.
For many years before that, he and his wife had lived in an estate they built in Los Angeles’ San Fernando Valley where he had hoped his children would remain with him at least until they were married and perhaps even afterward. But there were estrangements, and Jackson, a dandy who wore a pencil-thin mustache and huge diamond pinky ring, faced allegations by his wife of infidelity. She filed for divorce twice but never followed through.
“We just let our troubles die out,” Jackson said in 1988, following a reconciliation. “We survived. We love each other, and we have children. That’s why we’re together.”
When Dr. Conrad Murray went on trial in 2010, charged in Michael’s overdose death from propofol, Joseph and Katherine attended court with several of Michael’s siblings. Murray’s conviction of involuntary manslaughter provided some measure of comfort for the family.
Joe Jackson is survived by his wife, his children and more than two dozen grandchildren.
By Associated Press
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Hotboxing My Dad: A Weed Trip and the Future Failure of Illinois
By David Himmel
If it had been a counter at any other kind of store, you could wonder if maybe he didn’t belong back there. His hair looked like it cultivated a safe space from all hair-grooming products and tools; his clothes hung off his skin and bones like they hung off the racks at the firestorm sale at the resale shop where he likely found them; his mustache was a good effort but a poor performance; his skin had a blue hue — perma-pale — perhaps from an adult life spent sunk into the couch. He had all the earmarks of a stoner. A burnout. A pothead.
This is exactly why he was the perfect person to be behind this counter at the dispensary at RiverRock Cannabis, a farm and store in Denver, Colo., where the use of recreational weed has been legal since 2014. And this is exactly the reason we were in Denver to begin with. My brother wanted his bachelor party to be ripe with friends, golf and a whole crapload of weed — all legal, of course.
There’s nothing wrong with how the clerk looked, but he did look like a stereotype. And I imagine it’s hard to find work when you look like you sleep on a bong-water bed. Maybe not. Maybe this guy could straighten up and look more straightedge and acceptable for any other job. But why bother? In Denver, he could put his vast and exceptional knowledge of cannabis to great use without having to fart around with business casual. And he could do it without all the judgement and assholery that comes from a culture which thinks looking like a pothead is a bad thing. This guy, this stoner behind the counter, was more helpful than any putz at any store you could visit in the Clybourn Corridor. Because this guy believed in what he was selling. He was a part of this enterprise, an enterprise, for which he had great passion. How many of us can say that?
My father was amazed. Dad had no business being in a cannabis dispensary. The guy had never touched the stuff and had no interest in doing so. He was there because this stop was part of the weed farm tour my brother’s best friend had booked for us. And Dad is nothing if not a team player. And like most intelligent men, he’s curious. Though I’ve never been able to get him try weed — or sushi, for that matter — he’s curious of how it all works. (There are different levels to curiosity. You don’t have to go to Jupiter to understand it better.)
The main table back at the Airbnb looked like Willie Nelson’s suitcase had exploded. There was a collection of flowers, edibles, oils, vape pens, bowls, rolling papers, pinners... about every kind of vehicle required to consume cannabis with just as many degrees of potency via strain and milligram. A few empty boxes of sugar cereal and gutted candy wrappers provided by a late-night run to 7-Eleven was the coup de grâce. As my brother and his friends sat around the table, talking shop, and trading or sharing goods, Dad would occasionally ask, “What’s that?” or “What does that do?” They were the same questions almost everyone has ever asked when they first came into real contact with real pot. It can be overwhelming, and impressive.
Dad isn’t big on substances as vices like his kids are, and it wasn’t that long ago when he was calling the cops on my brother while in high school for his pot use. And now, here they were: My brother and his pals at the counter of a weed shop picking out their pot like they were trading skee-ball tickets for prizes at Chuck E. Cheese, and Dad in the back watching it all take place, listening intently on the questions and orders:
“What’s the most potent?” “Do you have oil cartridges that’ll fit this pen?” “What’s that stuff you can take to bring you back from a really bad high? Our tour guide was just telling us about it. Shit, what is that stuff? I need some of that stuff sometimes.”
“It really is its own lifestyle,” Dad said to me, my own light high from the pull of the tour guide’s pen back on our private limo bus still giving my mind a gentle massage.
He’s right. It’s a lifestyle and it’s an economy. And it’s something the State of Illinois could use more of.
“Do you have espresso beans? I think that’s the only way I can get my fiancé to get high.”
Weed is already legal in Illinois, with a doctor’s note. In March, 68 percent of Cook County voters said yes to the referendum that would allow the legalization of recreational marijuana. Problem is, it’s an advisory referendum meaning that Gov. Bruce Rauner can, and plans on, telling voters to get bent. In a state that is in desperate need of new money and school funding, specifically, the Governor is a fool to turn down this opportunity. As a billionaire businessman, he's supposed to know a good financial opportunity when he sees it. And especially when his board of directors — the voters — tell him it's something we want him to do. Rauner is making the other billionaire — the k.d. lang lookalike — running against him appear as an actual better option.
The arguments aren’t new, and they’re obvious. There are job opportunities for small business owners, farmers, stoners, distributors, package designers, and so on and so on. There’s the regulation of it, which helps keep it safe, decriminalizes it so that people’s lives aren’t destroyed for wanting to mellow out after a day at work or a fight with the missus or mister or whatever, or for selling it to those Joes and Janes, when the exact thing they're doing could be a legit job with income tax coming through, et. al. Since 2014, marijuana sales in Colorado have accounted for almost $5 billion in revenue. In the first two months of 2018, $230 million worth of weed was sold. Legally. Of the money earned directly from the state slinging pot, $40 million is earmarked for education. That’s $40 million every year going straight toward the state’s future leaders. Not a bad investment. Illinois could use some better investment tactics.
Dad and I watched my brother, red eyed and having the time of his life in some euphoric haze alongside his bust buddies, pick out his preferred pot. “Do you have espresso beans? I think that’s the only I can get my fiancé to get high.” The stoner behind the counter told him no, he did not have those beans. But he told him of a different dispensary — a competitor — that did. It’s where we would direct the limo driver to next.
On the way, our guide rolled two fat joints with the speed and skill of a seasoned professional. You can smoke on private property, and this limo bus was private property. The windows didn’t open, so we were hotboxed. I was worried about Dad. But he was cool. He watched as the rest of us took our hits and passed to the left. He listened intently as the guide and I talked about our kids. Hers was seven months, mine only one. And Dad watched my brother sink deeper into the limo bus’s cushions as his eyes grew a darker red and his grin grew wider and more deranged like the Cheshire Cat. All the guys were pretty baked. But that’s not what Denver is like. It’s not a city of zombie stoners giddy and hungry and dumb. Just the same as Las Vegas isn’t a city of drunken bachelorettes with busted stiletto heels wobbling through the bright lobby of the wrong hotel at breakfast time.
My brother and his friends were on a binge. Getting the most of some of the best a progressive state has to offer. Illinois is missing out.
“If Illinois legalizes weed, your brother will be dead,” Dad said to me. “Look at him.”
Maybe. But death by weed is unlikely. The one thing that’s sure to die without legalizing it is the State of Illinois.
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Hotboxing My Dad: A Weed Trip and the Future Failure of Illinois
By David Himmel
If it had been a counter at any other kind of store, you could wonder if maybe he didn’t belong back there. His hair looked like it cultivated a safe space from all hair-grooming products and tools; his clothes hung off his skin and bones like they hung off the racks at the firestorm sale at the resale shop where he likely found them; his mustache was a good effort but a poor performance; his skin had a blue hue — perma-pale — perhaps from an adult life spent sunk into the couch. He had all the earmarks of a stoner. A burnout. A pothead.
This is exactly why he was the perfect person to be behind this counter at the dispensary at RiverRock Cannabis, a farm and store in Denver, Colo., where the use of recreational weed has been legal since 2014. And this is exactly the reason we were in Denver to begin with. My brother wanted his bachelor party to be ripe with friends, golf and a whole crapload of weed — all legal, of course.
There’s nothing wrong with how the clerk looked, but he did look like a stereotype. And I imagine it’s hard to find work when you look like you sleep on a bong-water bed. Maybe not. Maybe this guy could straighten up and look more straightedge and acceptable for any other job. But why bother? In Denver, he could put his vast and exceptional knowledge of cannabis to great use without having to fart around with business casual. And he could do it without all the judgement and assholery that comes from a culture which thinks looking like a pothead is a bad thing. This guy, this stoner behind the counter, was more helpful than any putz at any store you could visit in the Clybourn Corridor. Because this guy believed in what he was selling. He was a part of this enterprise, an enterprise, for which he had great passion. How many of us can say that?
My father was amazed. Dad had no business being in a cannabis dispensary. The guy had never touched the stuff and had no interest in doing so. He was there because this stop was part of the weed farm tour my brother’s best friend had booked for us. And Dad is nothing if not a team player. And like most intelligent men, he’s curious. Though I’ve never been able to get him try weed — or sushi, for that matter — he’s curious of how it all works. (There are different levels to curiosity. You don’t have to go to Jupiter to understand it better.)
The main table back at the Airbnb looked like Willie Nelson’s suitcase had exploded. There was a collection of flowers, edibles, oils, vape pens, bowls, rolling papers, pinners... about every kind of vehicle required to consume cannabis with just as many degrees of potency via strain and milligram. A few empty boxes of sugar cereal and gutted candy wrappers provided by a late-night run to 7-Eleven was the coup de grâce. As my brother and his friends sat around the table, talking shop, and trading or sharing goods, Dad would occasionally ask, “What’s that?” or “What does that do?” They were the same questions almost everyone has ever asked when they first came into real contact with real pot. It can be overwhelming, and impressive.
Dad isn’t big on substances as vices like his kids are, and it wasn’t that long ago when he was calling the cops on my brother while in high school for his pot use. And now, here they were: My brother and his pals at the counter of a weed shop picking out their pot like they were trading skee-ball tickets for prizes at Chuck E. Cheese, and Dad in the back watching it all take place, listening intently on the questions and orders:
“What’s the most potent?” “Do you have oil cartridges that’ll fit this pen?” “What’s that stuff you can take to bring you back from a really bad high? Our tour guide was just telling us about it. Shit, what is that stuff? I need some of that stuff sometimes.”
“It really is its own lifestyle,” Dad said to me, my own light high from the pull of the tour guide’s pen back on our private limo bus still giving my mind a gentle massage.
He’s right. It’s a lifestyle and it’s an economy. And it’s something the State of Illinois could use more of.
“Do you have espresso beans? I think that’s the only way I can get my fiancé to get high.”
Weed is already legal in Illinois, with a doctor’s note. In March, 68 percent of Cook County voters said yes to the referendum that would allow the legalization of recreational marijuana. Problem is, it’s an advisory referendum meaning that Gov. Bruce Rauner can, and plans on, telling voters to get bent. In a state that is in desperate need of new money and school funding, specifically, the Governor is a fool to turn down this opportunity. As a billionaire businessman, he's supposed to know a good financial opportunity when he sees it. And especially when his board of directors — the voters — tell him it's something we want him to do. Rauner is making the other billionaire — the k.d. lang lookalike — running against him appear as an actual better option.
The arguments aren’t new, and they’re obvious. There are job opportunities for small business owners, farmers, stoners, distributors, package designers, and so on and so on. There’s the regulation of it, which helps keep it safe, decriminalizes it so that people’s lives aren’t destroyed for wanting to mellow out after a day at work or a fight with the missus or mister or whatever, or for selling it to those Joes and Janes, when the exact thing they're doing could be a legit job with income tax coming through, et. al. Since 2014, marijuana sales in Colorado have accounted for almost $5 billion in revenue. In the first two months of 2018, $230 million worth of weed was sold. Legally. Of the money earned directly from the state slinging pot, $40 million is earmarked for education. That’s $40 million every year going straight toward the state’s future leaders. Not a bad investment. Illinois could use some better investment tactics.
Dad and I watched my brother, red eyed and having the time of his life in some euphoric haze alongside his bust buddies, pick out his preferred pot. “Do you have espresso beans? I think that’s the only I can get my fiancé to get high.” The stoner behind the counter told him no, he did not have those beans. But he told him of a different dispensary — a competitor — that did. It’s where we would direct the limo driver to next.
On the way, our guide rolled two fat joints with the speed and skill of a seasoned professional. You can smoke on private property, and this limo bus was private property. The windows didn’t open, so we were hotboxed. I was worried about Dad. But he was cool. He watched as the rest of us took our hits and passed to the left. He listened intently as the guide and I talked about our kids. Hers was seven months, mine only one. And Dad watched my brother sink deeper into the limo bus’s cushions as his eyes grew a darker red and his grin grew wider and more deranged like the Cheshire Cat. All the guys were pretty baked. But that’s not what Denver is like. It’s not a city of zombie stoners giddy and hungry and dumb. Just the same as Las Vegas isn’t a city of drunken bachelorettes with busted stiletto heels wobbling through the bright lobby of the wrong hotel at breakfast time.
My brother and his friends were on a binge. Getting the most of some of the best a progressive state has to offer. Illinois is missing out.
“If Illinois legalizes weed, your brother will be dead,” Dad said to me. “Look at him.”
Maybe. But death by weed is unlikely. The one thing that’s sure to die without legalizing it is the State of Illinois.
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