#spirituality never came with an instruction manual

[sadhyog]

Looking for yoga classes in Gurgaon? | Join Sadhyog - Isha Hatha Yoga

Today's hectic & fast-paced modern lifestyle has brought material well-being, but little is done to address the dimension of spiritual or inner wellbeing.

Yoga, an ancient science of evolving the human system to its highest potential, becomes all the more relevant today. Sadhguru often says that this human body is the most sophisticated gadget on the planet. But have we read its user manual? Yoga is the user manual which helps you raise your human system to its highest potential. Once your body is working at its highest, all diseases, stress are simply taken care of.

Isha hatha yoga is a unique set of Yogic practices brought by Sadhguru to explore this ancient science of yoga in its full depth and dimension. At Sadhyog's Yoga center in gurgaon, we teach these powerful practices. The classes are conducted by world class teachers trained under the guidance of Sadhguru.

We are proud to have offered these yogic practices to 1500+ participants in Gurgaon. 

Sharing some testimonials:

Sadhyog is not like a regular yoga classes in Gurgaon where you follow a usual set of practices in a dark basement, following the trainer's instructions.

Sadhyog is an experience!

The initial sessions are a mix of physical movement, explanation on Sadhyog philosophy, pranayam and Sadhguru's teachings.

I have been to two studios that are pristine white with high levels of cleanliness & hygiene, beautifully kept and add to one's experience. The sessions are structured to address inner & outer transformation, the trainers make you feel welcomed, the studios make you feel peaceful, and this makes me excited to go for the sessions.

These are unique sessions, nothing like I have experienced earlier.

-Ruchita, 4 months with Sadhyog

I was looking for yoga classes in Gurgaon and came across Sadhyog. This is a different place to be when you are looking for yoga classes in Gurgaon in terms of not just physical well-being but mental too. Amazing place to learn and unlearn from the best of the people. The right yoga practices here makes your body more at ease. I have been practicing here for the last few months and can also feel the difference. This is a very different yoga studio and is highly recommended.

-Soham, 14 months with Sadhyog

I think joining Sadhyog has been my best decision this year. The experience here is really wonderful. Perfect ambience with great teachers who truly believe in imparting this wonderful knowledge in its purest form. Every mudra/asanas is explained in depth. There are so many small details to every asana that makes so much difference which I am getting to know here. Also, each day is designed with a slightly different set of yoga practices and there is something new at regular intervals which never lets you feel monotonous. Everyday I look forward to coming here.There is a different calmness and happiness within.

Hope that everyone gets to have this beautiful experience

-Parul, 6 months with Sadhyog

I have been transformed by it. Initially, my goal for joining a yoga class was to lose some weight and become more peaceful, but Dilbag anna helped us understand the depth of the practice. Our knowledge is greatly enriched by surya kriya and surya shakti, as well as other asanas taught by experienced teachers. If you want to start practicing yoga, I highly recommend this place.

-Praneeth, 8 months with Sadhyog

I never thought that yoga could replace gym. I started hatha yoga at Sadhyog 4 months ago. I am now more mentally and emotionally balanced. My sincere gratitude to Dilbag Anna and Sheetal Akka for guidance and support.

-Jitesh, 13 months with Sadhyog

It feels great to be a part of this amazing program. It's been two weeks and the transition that I have started to see makes me feel good each day and to start my day on a positive note. The ambience in itself sends you soothing vibes. The practices have been designed in a way that any individual who is new to yogic practice will actually feel self motivated to learn the same once they have attended the session with mind and heart in wholesomeness. The guidance provided by the trainers and their constant supervision makes you evolve each day. Being a part of this journey has also motivated me to work upon my thought process, discipline and how to keep myself calm while the mind is juggling with numerous thoughts.

While I know this is just the start but the way I am heading with these practices, I feel really good about myself. One thing that I have adopted in my life with this practice is giving priority to my well being.

And for all those workaholics who have put their well being on the backseat and looking for a moment to reverse this cycle would recommend experiencing the program. It surely helps !!!

Namaskaram

-Priyalisa, 5 months with Sadhyog

Finally, a place where YOGA is much more than transforming your body not only physically but mentally too. The ambience and vibes of the studio is very soothing. Best experience so far and look forward to learning more.

A Must have experience for everyone!

-Neha, 3 months with Sadhyog

It's been an amazing experience at sadhyog. I have been practicing surya kriya & surya shakti for a month and I feel so energetic &  bright the whole day. Even after a hectic day I have a lot of energy in me, my back pain has gone and my posture has improved. Also I am more pleasant & relaxed than ever. Since I have also done inner engineering, the experience of shambhavi mahamudra after hatha yoga changes to the next level.

I would highly recommend people to join this course and practice it everyday.

Namaskaram

-Aarushi, 7 months with Sadhyog

Sharing my experience after attending the Surya Kriya workshop over the weekend.

The first thing that I felt was an increase in my energy levels and alertness. I did not feel tired or sleepy anytime of the day after just learning the steps to perform the kriya.

The method of instruction also helped in understanding the process better and to remember the technique as well as steps.

The most significant part I felt was being in the space that has been created. The positive energy can surely be experienced.

-Karan, 8 months with Sadhyog

A beautiful and a change announcing practice for life that can make a mind stronger and more resilient to negative thoughts and emotions. I practice Surya Kriya for a thoughtful reunion with self. Gratitude to Guru Sadhguru for making this a humble and peaceful yogic practice for people around the world. Yoga with determination is an educational tool. Thank you.

Isha Yoga teachers are brilliant and masterful.

-Ruchi, 5 months with Sadhyog

Thank you for such a beautiful workshop such a detailed & seemingly complex practice(with all the breathing patterns & counts) melted into the system with ease. Effects of the practice were felt immediately after the two rounds we did together. It did bring in a sense of stillness & complete silence, I didn’t want to open my eyes( which was the best part). I will continue the practice for the next 40 days for sure. I would like to add that I registered for the workshop after seeing an instagram post of their space. It now totally makes sense why, the moment I entered the space I knew there’s something more, something special here.

If you are reading this and still contemplating if it's worth the time, energy & money. I assure you, it is. Do give it a try!

-Reyana, 9 months with Sadhyog

The one thing I love about Isha classical Hatha Yoga is that it’s taught in its purest form (without the frills) I recently attended Angarmadana with Sadhyog, the way you are supported by the teachers, the space you are practicing in, and the questions you have, all were clearly explained and answered. I walk away with the tools I need to continue my daily practice with confidence because of the way everything was conducted. Yes difficulties arose and Dilbagh Anna was readily available to discuss in further detail with you one to one   I am grateful for the invaluable tools you have given me I feel like I don’t ever need to go to another yoga classes in Gurgaon again I will practice daily what you have taught me and continue on my journey and see you again soon when I’m back in India

-Anju, 6 months with Sadhyog

Initially I was apprehensive about Sadyog, and thought that they are another shop of Yoga and might be exploiting the pious Sadhguru teachings.

However after interaction with the organizers and attending the Surka Shakti programme, my apprehension got cleared. Sadyog is truly following Sadguru programme and technology, as he loves to call them.

I thank and congratulate the management of Sadyog for continuing this noble cause.

-Dharmender, 5 months with Sadhyog

Our Yogic Community at Sadhyog is a strong family of people coming from different walks of life. We all come together to experience the transformative power of Isha Hatha Yoga.

If you are looking for yoga classes in Gurgaon, Sadhyog is your destination.

For more details, visit us :

Yoga center near me

#Yoga classes for weight loss near me #Yoga classes for weight loss #Yoga near me for ladies #Yoga centre near me for ladies #Yoga for women

[tsarisfanfiction]

Fic Recs: Thunderbirds

A while ago I did a Scott!whump Fic Rec.  This time there’s no theme.  Just Thunderbirds!  Characters and genres vary wildly.

Got put in the mood to do this the other week, and after trawling through all my AO3 bookmarks/FFN favourites, and then the archives themselves because I’m terrible and forget to save fics, here are a bunch of my personal favourites.  As always, only complete fics feature (there are many fantastic ongoing ones, but I’m lazy and don’t like having to update fic statuses).

This list is also long.  100+ fics long.  So it’s under a cut to save everyone’s sanity.  There’s also a spreadsheet version of it that I’ll make available if you wanna search by character/genre/universe etc.

Ratings are all using AO3′s Gen/Teen/Mature, so for FFN “K+” fics, I shoved them in either Gen or Teen, depending on my personal opinion.  Likewise, genres are done using FFN’s method for conciseness, so AO3 ones I just kinda guessed.  Only the major characters are listed.

I’ve tagged (attempted to tag, tumblr please behave) authors where I know their tumblr.  If there’s any I haven’t tagged that anyone knows, let me know!

And one last thing before the recs: If there’s anything in particular you want recs for, whether it be a character, a theme, a trope, a fandom, etc. just let me know and I’ll see about putting one together!

Δv/Δt by @tb5-heavenward [Gen; Family; John, Scott; 4k] Deceleration is a function of velocity over time.

A Break In Routine by @loopstagirl [Teen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Virgil; 15k] They put themselves in danger time and time again. That doesn't mean they can always walk away from it again though.

A Father by rosefields [Gen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Jeff; 3k] Scott Tracy has been under a lot of pressure since his mother died. But he can cope, it’s not a problem. Jeff know that, his oldest is strong and capable and he doesn’t need his father. Right?

A Guide to Valentine's Day (and how to exploit it) by Silverstar [Gen; Friendship; John, Penelope; 1k] In which John and Penelope pretend to go on a date to make the most of the discounts offered on meals for couples, because Valentine’s Day is about all kinds of love, including the platonic kind. A Seed Once Sown by @darkestwolfx [Gen; Friendship/Humour; Ned, Tracy Family; 4k] Believe it or not, they did have a garden on Tracy Island. It looked a little like a… tip. And that was being kind. A Son By Any Other Name by @space-baegel [Teen; Family/Angst; Scott, Tracy Family, Penelope; 83k] [AU] Cursed as a child, Scott Tracy lives a life in which everyone he encounters must follow all of his given commands. A Summary of Events by PanicPixieDreamGirl [Teen; Family; Tracy Family, Kayo; 3k] This is best described as ‘a look at how IR might function in the real world’ except obviously it’s not quite the real world because it’s several decades in the future and also after a war. A Typical Morning by @louthestarspeaker [Gen; Family/Humour; Tracy Brothers; 6k] The Terrible Two are scheming, Virgil just wants to be sleeping, and the brothers are faced with a bit of a situation. A typical morning in the Tracy household.

Access Denied // The Subject of Virgil by @gumnut-logic [Mature; Angst/Hurt/Comfort; Virgil, Scott; 5k // 8k] He found a way. All Alone by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Grandma; 5k] Scott reaches breaking point for looking after his brothers so Grandma Tracy takes charge of the situation, and her son. Babies and Brothers by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family; Scott, Jeff; 3k] He may grow into the world's most protective big brother, but even Scott needed time to get used to the idea of younger siblings. Back Story by @thunderbirdcarebear [Gen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott; 6k] That rock slide while rescuing Kat Kavanaugh has left Scott with more than just a few bruises. Bedtime by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family; Scott; 1k] “They’re my family.” Bring Our Starman Home by @lenle-g [Teen; Hurt/Comfort/Family; John, Scott; 28k] When a meteor hits Thunderbird 5 while shields are down, the Tracy family think John is dead for sure. Scott has prepared himself to fly up in TB3 with Alan to retrieve a body, for John couldn't possibly still be alive after that... could he? Bruised by @gumnut-logic [Gen; Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Virgil; 2k] Sometimes the prescription is simple, if unexpected. Buckle by Teobi [Gen; Family; Scott, Grandma; 1k] She finds him sitting at his father's desk, when everyone else has gone to bed. Candy Strippers by Chobrowny [Gen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Virgil, Gordon; 1k] The boys are unintentional candy stripers, visiting a childrens hospital in IR gear. Career Day by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family; Outside PoV, Alan; 7k] It is Career Day at school for eleven year old Alan Tracy. He has just lost his father. Who will he invite? Communications by nhsweetcherry [Gen; Adventure/Humour; Tracy Brothers; 4k] Random, short snippets of conversations between the guys. Some funny, some more serious. Coping Mechanism by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Hurt/Comfort/Angst; Virgil, Gordon, Scott; 7k] “I get you guys are busy and I’m spoilt that you all visit when you can, but honestly, this isn’t about me. This is out of character for Virg.” A pause. “And I miss him, okay?” Dare To Hope by i_amnerd [Gen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott, John; 1k] Not for the first time, Scott wishes that little brothers came with some kind of training manual or instruction booklet. Denied by @thunderstorm-bay [Teen; Family; Gordon; 4k] Gordon is frustrated after "Deep Search" and "City Under The Sea". Different by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family; John, Kayo; 2k] John Tracy is different. Dinosaur Dilemma by @godsliltippy [Teen; Action/Adventure; Gordon, Alan; 14k] Never in a million years would International Rescue have thought they would be rescuing victims from dinosaurs. Alan's excited, Virgil is... well, Virgil, John's out of his element, and Gordon is terrified. Edge of the World // Here Be Dragons by Corbyinoz2 [Teen; Hurt/Comfort/Adventure; Gordon, Virgil, Scott; 47k // 114k] When returning from a rescue mission, Thunderbird Two is attacked by an unknown force. As Virgil and Gordon plummet towards the ocean, their chances of survival will depend, as it always does, on each other. Every time it snows by allandmore [Teen; Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Gordon; 5k] A simple mountain rescue goes wrong for International Rescue. Gordon battles the elements and his memories, and Scott has a tough decision to make. Exhaustion by @sugar-fiend [Teen; Suspense/Angst; Alan, John, Scott; 9k] A rescue mission in space is interrupted with deadly consequences… Expected & Unexpected by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family; Gordon, Virgil, Scott; 1k] He had brothers. It was inevitable, but sometimes unexpected. Facts of Life by Kaeera [Teen; Drama; Scott; 5k] There are some situations – lying on a floor in a pool of your own blood, for example – that really put things into perspective. Famous Last Words by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family; Scott; 2k] All Scott wanted was for everyone to be quiet so nothing else could go wrong. That was apparently too much to ask. Fires of Adversity by NKala99 [Teen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Alan; 39k] Not everyone is supportive of Alan’s new and improved attitude towards school. First Times by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family/Humour; Scott; 3k] In which Scott forgets the speed of Thunderbird One, Virgil and John come up with a new form of torture and Gordon is after revenge. Just a normal day in the Tracy household then. Five Times Alan Flew Another Thunderbird by Silverstar [Teen; Hurt/Comfort/Family; Alan; 61k] ...and the one time he didn't. Five Times The Floor Was Not Lava by Silverstar [Gen; Humour/Family; Tracy Brothers; 5k] ...and the one time it was. Flat Packed by @hedwigstalons [Gen; Humour; Scott; 600] A simple mission leaves Scott minus two brothers and plus one headache Game On by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family; Scott, Virgil; 12k] As their future Field Commander, it was up to Scott to make sure his brothers were ready for duty - physically as well as mentally. Grudgingly Human by Yarnaholic [Mature; Angst; Scott; 4k] Scott faces some old demons while trying to talk down a man standing on a building ledge after a rescue. He Is, They Are by ThatGirlSix [Teen; Family; Tracy Brothers; 90k] Fixing what was wrong with their family was going to take longer than the span of a Disney movie, but they'd get there eventually. They lived on an island. It wasn't like there was anywhere else to go. He's WHERE? by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family; Virgil, Scott; 1k] Virgil's reaction to finding out that the Hood is in Thunderbird Two... His Part by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family, Angst; Scott, Virgil, Tracy Brothers; 4k] It started off as a mild annoyance. Holiday From Hell by @loopstagirl [Teen; Family, Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Virgil, Jeff; 158k] It was supposed to be the break they all needed to put the last year behind them and take a step forward. But things never do work out that easily for the Tracys. Homecoming by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family; Scott, John; 2k] There are times when only a big brother can help. When something seems to be on John's mind, Scott steps up to the challenge. I Dream of Genie by @godsliltippy [Teen; Action/Friendship; Penelope, Gordon; 50k] Penelope stumbles across a treasure that could bring more frustration than she bargained for. Illusion of a Saint by AlternateReality1 [Teen; Spiritual/Suspense; Scott, Hood; 92k] There’s an enemy admist their ranks. He’s hidden in plain sight. The question is… when will the illusion be shattered? In Enemy Hands by Claudette [Gen; Adventure, Drama; Scott, John; 62k] When the secrets of International Rescue are offered for sale to the highest bidder the Tracy family must act quickly. However, their secrets are not the only thing that is at stake. In The Trunk by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Virgil; 1k] “Why don’t you ever listen to me?!” It Wasn't Me! by @janetm74fics [Gen; Family; Gordon, Scott; 3k] It's not like it isn't the first time Gordon had accidentally hurt one of his brothers, but this time? When his dad doesn't believe him Gordon decides to find the one person who will make everything better. John Tracy hated taking public transport by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Friendship; John; 2k] Every trip he buried himself in his own world whether it be his work, research, a good book or even a movie. He shut the world out and more importantly anyone who sat next to him.  Sometimes this was not possible.  Because sometimes they spoke to him. Just Another Rescue by teddy0bear [Gen; Family/Adventure; Scott, Virgil; 16k] A rescue turns into a hostage situation Just Let It Go by @angelofbenignmalevolence [Gen; Family; Scott, Gordon; 1k] Scott was just trying to get a little work done. Alan and Gordon were working on Alan's schoolwork. What could possibly go wrong? La tarte aux pommes d'or by Yarol2075 [Gen; Friendship; Scott, Mechanic; 400] Scott needs to thank the Mechanic - it really shouldn't be so hard. Labyrinth by TB's LMC [Mature; Horror/Supernatural; Scott; 12k] One minute Scott Tracy’s at Mobile Control directing a rescue. The next, he’s in a fight for his life. Line 'Em Up Bartender by @madilayn [Teen; Friendship; Scott, John, Colonel Casey; 800] Scott, John and Colonel Casey find a way to cope with one of Jeff's speeches at a Charity Function. Living Like Kings by CLynnB [Gen; Family; Tracy Family; 35k] The world wants to know more about the Tracy brothers. So Lady Penelope takes it upon herself to show the world just who they are. Through YouTube. Making Changes by @madilayn [Teen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Tracy Brothers; 17k] Jeff Tracy has gone missing and International Rescue has to make some changes to cope with this. Merman by @janetm74fics [Gen; Family; Gordon; 700] He'd always wanted to be a merman. Ever since he was old enough to swim and read, his life had been filled with the sea and the things in the sea. A twist of fate may just give him that wish. Missing Scene: The Uninvited by Juud18 [Gen; Family; Scott; 2k] In between Scott being found by Lindsey and Wilson, and the scene where Scott, TinTin, Virgil, Brains, and Wilson and Lindsey are sitting at the campfire. Mission Impossible by @loopstagirl [Teen; Family/Adventure; Scott, Gordon; 55k] Being selected for his first solo mission should have been exciting for Captain Scott Tracy of the Air Force. But there was something else at play. Something dangerous and deadly. Something that could cost him more than his life. Monsters in the Dark by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family; Scott, Virgil; 3k] Scott was used to checking for monsters to keep his little brothers happy. He just wasn't so used to actually dealing with said monsters. More Than I Bargained For by puppetonalonelystring [Teen; Action/Hurt/Comfort; Scott; 13k] Scott attends a Yale reunion party thinking that it cannot turn out any worse than the last one. Unfortunately, things are never simple for the Tracy brothers - when things turn complicated for Scott he has to depend on his brothers to help sort the situation out, or the secrets of International Rescue will be exposed Never Too Late // Never Too Lost // Never Too Long by @loopstagirl [Teen; Hurt/Comfort/Family; Scott, Jeff; 58k // 75k // 138k] As the family deal with grief, Scott must face his fears and grow up, whilst Jeff battles between being dad and being a successful businessman. But what will it take to bring the two of them back together again? On Their Side by @gumnut-logic [Gen; Family/Humour; Colonel Casey, Gordon, Virgil; 1k] She trusted these boys with a great deal. Once In A Blue Moon by WhatHaveWeDone [Teen; Hurt/Comfort; Virgil, John; 3k] It was an aligning of the planets when John and Virgil got to work together. Out of Your Mind // All in Your Mind by @loopstagirl [Teen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Gordon, Tracy Family, Hood; 75k // 149k] They can defy the odds and snatch people from the jaws of death on a daily basis. But sometimes, not all dangers come in a physical form. Over and Out by @thunderbirdcarebear [Gen; Hurt/Comfort/Family; Scott; 5k] An incident at an earthquake rescue leaves Scott frustrated when he’s injured. Parameters by @drdone [Teen; Family; Scott, John; 1k] “Just pretend to be my date” with John and Scott - in a non-shippy way. Picnic by ThatGirlSix [Teen; Family; Gordon, Virgil; 13k] Every Tracy has a type of job they hate, be them car crashes, hotel fires, mine collapses, whatever. Gordon absolutely hates tornadoes with a passion. No, really, he hates tornadoes. His life would be so much better if they never did another tornado job ever again. The rest of the family is starting to think so, too. Plus One Tracy by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Humour; Tracy Brothers, Kayo; 2k] So which Tracy is right for you? Pranks and Tempers by shadowfox8 [Teen; Angst/Family; Alan, Scott, Gordon; 8k] It was only supposed to be an innocent prank, but Gordon didn't bargain for more. Questions Like A Whirlwind by @darkestwolfx [Teen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott, John; 6k] He couldn't put it into words. He wasn't sure they'd understand if he did. He felt like a child, he felt like a murder, he felt… like he'd lost something and had no clue how to put it back in place by himself. Rescue by taralynden [Gen; Hurt/Comfort/Drama; Scott; 26k] On the way home from a rescue, Thunderbird One crashes and it’s up to Scott’s family to save him. Scott Series: Fallen Brother by QuestRunner [Teen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Alan; 11k] In a rare chance to bond with his youngest brother, Scott takes Alan with him on a simple mission to repair a damaged satellite. With tempers running high, the boys find themselves arguing over the roles they play in International Rescue. When Alan slips off a cliff, it’s up to Scott to save his brother and mend their broken relationship. Scott Series: Hidden Pain by QuestRunner [Teen; Hurt/Comfort/Family; Scott, Virgil; 4k] Scott suffers from a mysterious pain in his abdomen, but continues to push the limits on and off the field. Scott Series: Negative Split by QuestRunner [Teen; Family/Adventure; Scott, Virgil; 6k] Scott recruits Virgil as his fellow running partner for an upcoming 10K. When a mission takes a turn for the worst, Scott must put his running skills to the test before his whole world comes crashing down around him. Second Helpings by mcj [Mature; Family/Romance; Gordon, Alan, Grandma, Tin-Tin; 10k] Gordon Tracy's point of view of a VERY precarious romantic situation! Second Round by @darkestwolfx [Gen; Family/Humour; Virgil; 4k] All he wanted was a shower. Why did shopping have to be so complicated? And why did he always end up going? Next time, Scott could be lumped with the responsibility, smaller craft or not. Shattered by @singmetothesun [Gen; Hurt/Comfort/Family; Scott, Gordon; 2k] One Tracy brother leaves his feelings bottled up, until the smother hen catches him out. Shiver // Smacked by @loopstagirl [Teen; Hurt/Comfort/Family; Scott; 44k // 4k] When one of the Thunderbirds is infecting with something deadly, will the rest of the Tracys be able to save one of their own? Or are they about to be torn apart by grief again? Sidelined by @drdone [Gen; Family; Scott, Alan; 1k] Scott's sidelined for the time being and decides to ask Alan about college. Six Point Five by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Humour/Hurt/Comfort; Virgil, Scott; 1k] “So, Mr Tracy, on a scale of one to ten how would you rate the pain you are in?" Sky Candy by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Humour/Family; Virgil, Scott, Gordon; 4k] It was a pterodactyl sized bird. Possibly an elephant with wings. Sleeping Wounded by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Scott, Virgil, Fischler; 14k] Scott Tracy punched Langstrom Fischler. Sometimes by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family; Scott; 1k] Sometimes, Scott hates being the oldest. But are there some hidden perks... Stuck Like Glue by @drdone [Gen; Family; Scott, Virgil; 2k] Scott is stuck to Virgil like glue. Literally. Summonings by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family; Scott, Jeff; 2k] Alan isn't the only one in trouble at the beginning of Spring Break in regards to the 'birds. Swamped by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family; Virgil, Gordon; 1k] So here he was standing in his undershorts on top of his 'bird in the middle of the ocean for all nearby female aristocrats to see. Take a minute by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family; Virgil, Scott; 2k] A mechanical fault forces Virgil to take a minute in the middle of the Australian Outback. Terror After New York by @loopstagirl [Gen; Family; Scott, Gordon; 2k] It was all over. The rescue complete and everyone back safe and sound, finally. Yet it didn't seem as if everything had yet been put behind them entirely. The Antarctic Incident by @space-baegel, @tb5-heavenward [Teen; Adventure/Drama; Tracy Brothers; 9k] Thunderbird Two goes down in the middle of an Antarctic blizzard. The Assignment by Kaeera [Gen; Humour/Drama; Scott; 10k] Twelve year old Scott struggles with a writing assignment. Honestly, when you have four younger brothers, it can be hard finding time for yourself. The Bite by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Angst/Hurt/Comfort; Virgil, Scott; 1k] “I need my big brother, not his sacrifice.” the devil vs Gordon Tracy by @tb5-heavenward [Teen; Family; Gordon, Scott; 6k] Being a discussion about the namesakes of some lizards. The Fire by mcj [Mature; Family; Tracy Family; 22k] “Sometimes all you need is a little quiet reflection." The Hardest Thing by eriphi [Gen; Family; Scott, Jeff; 5k] How do you manage a billion dollar business and parent four growing boys at the same time? It takes something serious to make Jeff realise that he isn’t managing as well as he thought. The Most Dangerous Game by @godsliltippy [Teen; Action/Adventure; Scott, Gordon; 23k] Scott and Gordon find themselves unwilling participants. The One Where John Gets a Hug by Silverstar [Teen; Hurt/Comfort/Angst; John; 21k] Spending months by yourself has never been advisable behaviour, and John's never been good at asking people for help. Or: the Tracys learn the magical art of communication, with a load of hugs thrown in for good measure. The Proof is in the Jello by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family/Hurt/Comfort; Gordon, Alan; 3k] “Call it what you want, but I’m not going to let you rot in that room.” The Silent Conversation by mcj [Teen; Hurt/Comfort; Scott; 5k] The sound of sirens, a flash of light and waking up under a pile of rubble. How can Scott survive knowing help just might not come? The Spider Incident by Silverstar [Teen; Humour/Family; Virgil, Tracy Brothers; 5k] It takes a certain kind of bravery to save the world... it takes a different kind of bravery to remove a spider from the shower. Or: there is a spider, and the Tracy boys are disasters. The Splinter by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family; Virgil, Jeff; 1k] Now he had backup. The Venetian Venture by @tb5-heavenward [Teen; Romance; Gordon, Penelope; 11k] Penelope takes Gordon on a mission to Venice the waffle house blues by @akireyta, @tb5-heavenward [Teen; Family; Tracy Brothers; 5k] Wherein a bunch of boys sit around a restaurant, eating breakfast food and dozing on and off and talking about life. To Raise Havoc by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family; Havoc, Hood; 1k] They had to come from somewhere and he was more than she ever expected. Tomorrow Never Knows by Silverstar [Teen; Hurt/Comfort/Angst; Gordon, Alan, Scott; 110k] Things had not gone according to plan, to say the least. Now they were trapped on a deserted island in the middle of nowhere with no hope of rescue and increasingly slim chances of survival. To make matters worse, the Chaos Crew had shown up. This was not going to be a fun week. Triple Jeopardy by Purupuss [Teen; Drama; Tracy Brothers; 217k] One inventor and one set of plans. But triple trouble for the Tracys and International Rescue. V.T. Green by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family; Virgil; 23k] “Did you discover this, Brains?” He frowned. There was something familiar about this. Maybe they had discussed it recently. “Oh, no, this is V. T. Green. The man is brilliant.” We'll Be Home For Christmas by @gumnut-logic [Teen; Family/Friendship; Virgil, Tracy Brothers; 68k] The boys can’t fly home for Christmas, so they have to find another way. Weathering the Storm by tiylaya [Teen; Adventure/Angst; Scott, Gordon; 102k] When an unexpected storm shipwrecks a holidaying Jeff Tracy and three of his young sons, they’re thrown into a situation far more dangerous and complex than anyone initially realises.

#fic rec #thunderbirds are go #thunderbirds #thunderbirds 2004 #scott tracy #john tracy #virgil tracy #gordon tracy #alan tracy #jeff tracy #grandma tracy #kayo kyrano #lady penelope creighton-ward

[baeddel]

Kendrick talks about how after Aretino’s infamous innovation in pornography the whole genre that it inspired was associated with him so closely that authors would credit their texts to him and virtually all would take the forms that he used; either the Postures, which were instructional, and the Dialogues, fictional conversations between sex workers. He argues that Aretino & his imitators wrote about sex in a new way, which 'intellectualized’ sex as some kind of activity separable from its social, political, moral, religious, and medical context, and that this was something which had never been seen before and would characterize most of the pornography that came afterwards even centuries later.

[very nsfw lol, explicit bestiality tw]

This is very convincing to me. Virtually all of the earlier examples we gave previously were in the context of books that were almost all of these things at once. Nefzawi, writing in 15th century Tunisia, felt it appropriate to include serious medical remedies relating to sexual health, theological tracts and chapters on scientific zoology alongside the smut. The smut is also interesting because, while it places as much emphasis on the hydraulics as pornographers like John Cleland would do later, it always gave it a moral context. For example, the chapter titled On the Deceits and Treacheries of Women contains a series of short erotic stories about women doing immoral things like coercing pious men into sex, cheating on their husbands and having sexual relations with animals. Nefzawi prepares us (very briefly) by directing us to some verses of the Quran about women’s deceptiveness. When retelling the stories he uses moralizing language, condemning the women for their debauchery and evil, but gives the sexual mechanics commentary which is so exhaustive and thorough it invites us to participate sexually in the fiction. In one titled Story of a Man Who Was Made Cuckold By His Ass he describes how “she seized his [the donkey’s] member with one of her hands and introduced its head into her vulva. The vulva got more and more enlarged, so that the member, penetrating little by little, finished with being lodged in its full length, and brought on the crisis of the pleasure.” (Perfumed Garden, pg. 171)

When her husband catches her she comes up with some comedically appropriate explanation and the husband remains ignorant of the affair. He finishes by advising us to “learn from this the deceitfulness of women, and what they are capable of.” The structure reminds us of moral literature like the Physiologus or Aesop’s fables (nevermind the animal participant in this example), but the ‘punchline’ is not moral but comedic, and the extensive descriptions designed to arouse. Nefzawi is among the most accomplished ironists. He takes on the persona of a reverential establishment aristocrat, addressing the Grand Vizier (to whom God be good!) in exultant tones and praising God, the Highest, and while in this persona tells filthy stories. He extends the description, lingering over the sex acts and paying close attention to the demands of comedic timing, but adopts a sarcastic, scandalizing tone. It’s as though author-Nefzawi is not aware he is in a work of pornography; to himself he’s telling an austere sermon, and we are the ones fixating inappropriately on the “passion for coition.” In the other chapters the approbrium is absent; the erotic code is combined with the scientific code instead, recalling natural histories and medical manuals instead of moral literature, describing and classifying the passionate embrace with academic detachment. “[T]he vulva is furnished with a suction-pump (orifice of the uterus), which will clasp the virile member, and suck up the sperm with an irresistible force. The member once seized by the orifice, the lover is powerless to retain the sperm, for the orifice will not relax its hold until it has extracted every drop of sperm...” (Perfumed Garden, pg. 190-191).

But in Nefzawi, while using irony, there isn’t any indication that he doesn’t mean what he says. What would the real moral be? Nefzawi does want us to be aware of rape, extortion, bestiality and cuckoldry, and does think these are bad things. It’s wrong to say that in the Ass story he is inducing us to zoophilic fantasies. He really is warning us against them; but this actual warning can still be a pretext to erotic misadventure the description of which can be independently satisfying. Though the signal is divided, both receptions are authentic. Likewise, the medical recipes aren’t just the stage dress of a clinical pantomime the real purpose of which is to tantalize; they’re real remedies which were at least in those days believed to do what he tells us they do. Other, earlier pornographic literature is more straightforward, such as the various sutras and the writing of the esoteric sects of Taoism and Buddhism like the Tachikawa-ryu who saw in sexuality a real path to enlightenment, who’s writing was practical, analytical, moral, spiritual and erotic all at once.

Perhaps Deleuze was not, therefore, being so ridiculous when he said that Sade and Sacher-Masoch did not write pornography but “pornology” (Coldness & Cruelty, pg 17-18), if we think of ‘pornography’ as the hydraulic literature of Aretino and John Cleland, and ‘pornology’ as the ancient tradition of sexual-philosophical literature. Sade after all described his books as “philosophical novels”, would frequently erupt into nonfictional essays of political and ethical philosophy, and like Nefzawi ironically deployed the codes of moral literature (though now really subverting them, really arguing for the rape and bestiality! Once Again, Nefzawi, If...!)

[vajranam]

Drifting Yogi

DRIFTING YOGI– A rare modern day story of a spiritual adventure

PART -- 1 LEAVING HOME

"On December 13th 2004, I gave up my class 12th board exams and fled to India to become a monk.

I was brought up by a single mother along with three sisters. Growing up through dire poverty, my early childhood years were unforgettably sad and painful.

Having been a dreamy boy, i took comfort from reading poetry and spiritual books at school. I was a lazy, dull-witted student and did not perform well in exams.

Since i couldn't figure out an ambition

for my future, i remember studying the academic subjects only to get through the exams; so that i don't disappoint my guardians who were spending for my schooling.

To distract my attention from the troublesome situations of a boarding school life those years, where resources were scanty... and the constant bullying by elders, i drove my emotions deeper into spirituality and consoled myself through writing poems.

Sometimes gazing at the serene images of Lord Buddha.... i started dreaming of studying and practicing meditation to achieve that amazingly peaceful and hypnotic composure of a sitting Buddha.

And i didn't care about achieving anything otherwise.

So in December 2004 in Zhemgang higher sec. School, aged nineteen i gave up my bio-science exams and embarked on an extremely uncertain, risky and adventurous journey to India without a penny in my pocket.

Making the long story short.......

I arrived in india somehow and with much jubilation got admitted in a renowned Tibetan buddhist monastery in north India.

But soon i was disappointed to learn that the monasteries are just another institutions to study ethics, philosophy and rituals in their respective traditions. And no monastery offered direct meditation instructions to the monks/students to realise for themselves.

After just about one year in the Shedra, i quit the monastic life and started wandering in search of a master or a 'Tsa wai Lama'.

Which happened to be yet another crazy decision.

PART -- 2 MEETING WITH MASTER

AND PRACTICE

After a couple months of leaving the monastery i happened to travel in Lahoul valley near Ladakh.

There i met a wandering Tibetan Yogi building an old-style rock Stupa on the mountain.

Our meeting sparked in me a curious sense of emotions that was mixed with joy and tears when ever he talked to me.

Tired of wandering and pilgrimage, the desperate me requested him to take me to where ever he was based, so that i can serve him and learn more from him and about him.

Living with him, my life became more difficult and uneasy.

Since his nature was extremely harsh and extremely loving sometimes. But at the end of each passing day i found out that my emotions were being tested to the limit and he was teaching me a lot in disguise.

So considering his arrogance to me as a rare blessing i made a firm resolution to never leave him in no matter what situation.

After much waiting, i received instructions and his protection to pursue solitary retreats. Constantly wandering from one mountain cave to another, from deep forests to deserts,

From sea shores to solitary islands, sleeping on the roadsides, under the trees and cemeteries, i wandered like a fallen leaf carried by the wind.

Once i walked about 700 miles and bicycled 2000 miles under the heavy rains and scorching sun of tropical India. They were all a part of my yogic practice of drifting without a particular aim.

For more than twelve years, being so lost and carried away in retreats and wandering... i have almost forgotten my home country Bhutan.

PART -- 3 A VISION

During my retreats in the forests of central India, my provisions were taken cared by the innocent villagers, who were newly converted buddhists due to caste issues in indian social system.

Villagers were more than happy to have me, a buddhist practitioner from a foreign land in their remote villages.

So moved by their innocent reverence i started teaching them meditation, the essence of all the teachings of the buddha.... Although i struggled to interpret my thoughts to them through my extremely poor spoken Hindi.

Later in early 2017 i travelled to south east asian countries invited by some friends.

There i was surprised to discover a vibrant culture of education and youth who were equally enthusiastic to practice meditation to enhance their quality of lives through spiritual values and understanding.

We can all agree to one inevitable challenge, that our pursuit of modern lifestyle and it's glamour, is costing a serious toll on mental health to everyone.

And simultaneously dragging our beautiful home planet into a disaster of pollution and over-exploitation.

It was highly nourishing for me to meet amazing young people in those countries, who were raising concerns about the future of humanity and giving their commitments to spiritual lives through the practice of meditation in their daily lives.

In late 2018 i came back to Bhutan to visit my mother.

And started travelling and teaching meditation in Bhutan without the pre-requirements of arduous ngondro practices.

To my surprise many students young or elderly, literate or illiterate, started giving me amazing feedbacks through their own experiences just after a few months of practice. And were thoroughly inspired to follow the path of meditation in order to understand the dharma deeper for further enlightenment.

Some students have stopped drinking and smoking as a natural effect of meditation. And a few more have recovered from depression and migraine.

But at the same time, some people seemed still confused and quite suspicious regarding my initiatives.

While i welcomed their doubts and criticism, i was also scanning the psychological landscape of people influenced by their own belief systems.

So my dear elders, youngers, friends and relatives in Bhutan.

Let me take some space to share my humble opinions of what meditation is all about.

In other countries buddhist meditation is taught in school systems to enhance the performance of students.

i have seen buddhist meditations practiced in christian churches to generate faith and devotion in christ.

Buddhist meditations are practiced by psychologist and psychiatrists and implemented on their patients to recover from their mental disorientation.

Buddhist meditations are taught in high profile leadership and business management courses to enhance their productivity.

Buddhist meditation is practiced in the military of some countries for better focus and precision in their training.

Buddhist meditation is practiced by hard-core criminals in prisons to recover from their corrupted state of minds.

One friend in Philipines, a school teacher is teaching meditation in a catholic school, and the school administration approves her initiative.

In Burma, Sri lanka and thailand politicians practice meditation to render their political service more effectively.

So my dear friends in Bhutan,

those people in other countries may never have heard of arduous ngondro practices but they are still practicing meditation as the heart of all teachings of buddha and getting benefited immensely.

Now.... one can definitely argue my statements that those meditations are from different origins, like the Theravada from Burma or Srilanka,

Zen from Japan and ours is secret Dzogchen from the path of vajrayana.

To this possible argument, i can simply answer that even if the meditation practices originate from different, different countries and traditions....... ALL THOSE MEDITATION MANUALS EXIST IN THE VAST COMPILATION OF KANJUR AND TENJUR, TO WHICH WE ALL PROSTRATE UN-KNOWINGLY

WHEN WE VISIT THE TEMPLES AND MONASTERIES.

Ngondro, a set of mandatory preliminary practices that require five to 6 months to complete is an amazing tool to enter the Vajrayana buddhist path.

But at the same time...... Buddhas meditation teachings, being the answer to all human quests....sadly remain inaccessible to a large section of devout buddhists in our country. Simply because most aspiring meditation practitioners cannot fulfill the obligation to complete the long and arduous ngondro which is the standard practice required by tradition, as the gateway to the path of meditation.

But dear friends.... I speak with conviction through what little experience and observations i have gathered, that ngondro can be also practiced after meditation.

in fact NGONDRO BECOMES MUCH MORE AUTHENTIC AND JOYFUL IF PRACTICED WITH A PRIOR EXPERIENCE OF MEDITATION.

A few weeks ago a friend of mine sent me the Royal Kasho granted by our beloved His majesty the king, regarding the reformation of educational system.

As a humble citizen, I was deeply moved by the concerns made by His majesty the King, regarding the future of our youth and education in comparison to the extremely fast changing environment we live in.

My heart was throbbing.... and while i was holding my breath, i realised that even as a humble and a nameless citizen, living lonely as the road, i have fondly entertained many dreams.... if my independent research in the field of meditation therapies from the deep buddhist wisdom, can contribute an additional facility to our existing model of education.

So on this beautiful social networking platform i drifting yogi would like to share my deep prayers and aspirations

To teach meditation further in Bhutan,

Purely as a science of self discovery under secular setting.... and also as the essence of our Vajrayana path.

I have a dream to teach meditation to our budding youth to empower themselves to pursue their passion in life and achieve their goals to live a life of contentment.

And recovering from any kind of addictions from substance abuses through mental strength cultivated from meditation.

In 2019 when i was still in India, i heard some horrifying news from Bhutan about a series of rapes of minors in Paro, Dagana and somewhere.

My senses went numb.... and my mind was in dilemma out of sheer terror.

Because deep down.... i felt, if our youth can be educated in the practice of meditation, then such horrors can be totally prevented, by transforming the emotions of the practitioner into a naturally joyful and liberated state of being.

Finally, before i end this story,

I will drop a wish, that this story reach as many readers as possible.

And I deeply apologise if reading this story was a waste of time to some readers.

If any reader like this story, then i thank you for ur gesture of support.

And if any reader find flaws in my statements,

I welcome your valued criticism, so that i can learn a little from you.

MAY ALL BEINGS BE HAPPY!"

– By Drifting Yogi (Aka Sherab Dorji, 35)

Written on the bank of River Gamri, Lungten Zampa, Trashigang, Eastern Bhutan on 17 Feb.2021.

#wisdom #spirituality #mindfulness #meditation #religion #buddhism #self care #zen #visualization #tibet

[justforbooks]

The 10 most inspiring, enjoyable books about how to write

“Most people know what a story is until they sit down to write one,” the great short story writer Flannery O’Connor once wrote. When it comes to good writing, we can tend towards a romantic vision of it being an unexplainable, inimitable act of divine intervention. It can be inspiring – and often unpalatable – to be reminded that the best writing is more often the result of of hard and constant work.

Even if the last thing you are planning on doing in lockdown is writing a novel, here are some of the best guides on writing: how to do it, how it works and how to be inspired to start. There were plenty of books that did not make this list that I would still recommend as entertaining, stirring and useful for would-be writers, such as The Writer’s Chapbook (a collection of advice given by authors in the Paris Review, which seems to be out of print now), Tillie Olsen’s Silences (important but not stuffed with practical advice) or Annie Dillard’s The Writing Life (ditto). And as any successful writer would say, the best thing you can do to learn how to write is read, read, read. But it couldn’t hurt to try a few of the following, too.

1. On Writing by Stephen King

Who better to learn from than a man who went from living in a trailer park to being one of the bestselling authors in the world? While some of King’s advice could be considered common sense (write every day, don’t presume to be smarter than your readers, read more), the details of King’s own life (alcoholism, car accident), his punishing schedule (2,000 words a day) and his no-nonsense humour (“The road to hell is paved with adverbs”) make this a very readable guide. So many authors credit On Writing as being instrumental in becoming a paid writer.

2. Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott

Another classic of the genre. Lamott – an author and creative-writing teacher – focuses on the inherent value of writing, even if it is never shared with anyone, never published, or never makes money. The lessons she shares with her students, who “kind of want to write but really want to be published”, are refreshing – such as the maxim that all good writers write “shitty drafts”. There are good practical exercises, too.

3. Release the Bats by DBC Pierre

A relatively new addition to the genre by the Booker-winning author, who recalls anecdotes from his colourful life (“hellraiser” is an apt description for Pierre) to explain the intricacies of good storytelling. There are some real gems (his tale of finding children living in the attic of his family home is astounding) and there are some tips you won’t get elsewhere, such as: “Weed is a writerly drug … it is the drug of choice for staring at a blank page and watching stories grow out of tangents.”

4. Draft No 4 by John McPhee

Just as journalists such as Hunter S Thompson and Tom Wolfe pioneered the flashy, challenging and sometimes infuriating “new journalism”, McPhee was shaping an equally influential form of nonfiction while writing for the New Yorker: quieter, equally literary, blending fastidious accuracy with novelistic storytelling. This collection of essays is warmly reassuring and instructive, and worth buying for the essay called Structure alone, in which McPhee explains how he plans long and complex nonfiction works.

5. The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron

Yes, there is more than a whiff of spiritual cheesiness in this guide to “recovering your creative self” – Cameron uses “God” as a stand-in for creative energy, which might ruffle some atheists – but it has helped everyone from Elizabeth Gilbert to Martin Scorsese. Several authors I have spoken to swear by some of Cameron’s exercises, particularly “morning pages”: handwriting three pages of stream of consciousness before tackling any work, in order to get the day-to-day baggage out of your mind and focus on creative thinking instead.

6. Letters to a Young Writer by Colum McCann

Last year, I met the Let the Great World Spin author and he immediately began nudging me to write a novel. Whether it was the wine or sheer politeness, I was intrigued to meet an author who seemed so buoyed by the possibilities of other people’s writing – so when I heard about this book, I had to buy a copy. Broken up into 52 short pieces on everything from opening lines to procrastination, it is not so much a manual as a “word in the ear”, as McCann puts it. Crucially, as a creative-writing teacher, he dispels the notion that you have to have a qualification to become a novelist: “In the end nothing will matter but the words on the page: who cares if they came from an MFA or not?”

7. Adventures in the Screen Trade by William Goldman

Having written screenplays including Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, All the President’s Men, and novels such as The Princess Bride and Marathon Man, Goldman could not be a better teacher. While this guide sometimes favours gossipy entertainment over practical advice, authors have said they appreciate its lessons in ruthlessness – and one of the last chapters, titled Before We Begin Writing, is brilliant for writers of all kinds.

8. Story Genius by Lisa Cron

Cron’s lengthy subtitle – How to Use Brain Science to Go Beyond Outlining and Write a Riveting Novel (Before You Waste Three Years Writing 327 Pages That Go Nowhere) – tell you everything you need to know. She uses neuroscience to explain why certain books keep us up reading into the early hours and why others bore us to tears. No matter how beautiful your writing is, if your protagonist doesn’t have an internal struggle, Cron argues, readers will not care. She then explains how you, a writer, can use that to hook and hold readers and get everything right by draft four or five, instead of 14 or 15.

9. Steering the Craft by Ursula K Le Guin

“This is not a book for beginners,” the late, great queen of science-fiction writes at the start of this book and she isn’t one for hand-holding. There is no advice on rejection letters or finding “God” here, or even advice on plotting or characterisation. (If you are after that, you’d be better off with King.) Instead, Le Guin provides useful exercises to encourage writers to improve their work at the sentence level, including one called Chastity: write a page of descriptive narrative prose, without adverbs, adjectives or dialogue.

10. The Elements of Style by William Strunk Jr and EB White

Finally, the grandfather of writing books. Written by the Charlotte’s Web author (White) and his former English professor (Strunk), the duo don’t teach you to kill your darlings so much as massacre them with a big smile on your face. Omit needless words. Avoid a succession of loose sentences. (Read: too many commas.) While some writers would bridle at such concrete edicts on what makes “good writing”, others have credited the book with helping them gain clarity and shed affectation in their writing.

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at http://justforbooks.tumblr.com

#JUST FOR BOOKS

[anastpaul]

Saint of the Day – 28 January – Saint Joseph Freinademetz SVD (1852-1908) Priest and Missionary of the Society of the Divine Word, the First Saint to Ever Serve in Hong Kong, Missionary to China, St Joseph had an immense devotion to Eucharistic Adoration – born on 15 April 1852 in Pedraces in Val Gadena, the Tyrolean Alps, Italy and died on 28 January 1908 in Taikia, China of tuberculosis and typhus.   St Joseph is also known as Giuseppe Freinademetz, Joseph of Shantung, Jozef Freinademetz,  Ujoep (nickname), “the Saint of Charity” and his Chinese name “Fu Shenfu” – Lucky Priest.

Joseph Freinademetz was born on 15 April 1852, in Oies, a small hamlet of five houses situated in the Dolomite Alps of northern Italy.   The region, known as South Tyrol, was then part of the Austro-Hungarian empire, it is now part of Italy.   He was Baptised on the day he was born and he inherited from his family a simple but tenacious faith.

Birthplace of St Joseph in Oies

While Joseph was studying theology in the diocesan seminary of Bressanone (Brixen), he began to think seriously of the foreign missions as a way of life.   He was ordained a priest on 25 July 1875 and assigned to the community of Saint Martin very near his own home, where he soon won the hearts of the people.   However, the call to missionary service did not go away.   Just two years after ordination he contacted Fr Arnold Janssen, the founder of a mission house which quickly developed into the Society of the Divine Word.

With his Bishop’s permission, Joseph entered the mission house in Steyl, Netherlands, in August 1878.   On 2 March 1879, he received his mission cross and departed for China with Fr John Baptist Anzer, another Divine Word Missionary.   Five weeks later they arrived in Hong Kong, where they remained for two years, preparing themselves for the next step.   In 1881 they travelled to their new mission in South Shantung, a province with 12 million inhabitants and only 158 Christians.

Those were hard years, marked by long, arduous journeys, assaults by bandits and the difficult work of forming the first Christian communities.   As soon as a community was just barely developed, an instruction from the Bishop would arrive, telling him to leave everything and start anew.

Soon Joseph came to appreciate the importance of a committed laity, especially catechists, for first evangelisation.   He dedicated much energy to their formation and prepared a catechetical manual in Chinese.   At the same time, together with Anzer (who had become Bishop) he put great effort into the preparation, spiritual formation and ongoing education of Chinese priests and other missionaries.   His whole life was marked by an effort to become a Chinese among the Chinese, so much so that he wrote to his family:  “I love China and the Chinese. I want to die among them and be laid to rest among them.”

In 1898, Freinademetz was sick with laryngitis and had the beginnings of tuberculosis as a result of his heavy workload and many other hardships.   So at the insistence of the Bishop and the other priests he was sent for a rest to Japan, with the hope that he could regain his health. He returned to China somewhat recuperated, but not fully cured.

When the Bishop had to travel outside of China in 1907, Freinademetz took on the added burden of the administration of the diocese.   During this time there was a severe outbreak of typhus.   Joseph, like a good shepherd, offered untiring assistance and visited many communities until he himself became infected.   He returned to Taikia, the seat of the diocese, where he died on 28 January 1908.   He was buried at the twelfth station on the Way of the Cross and his grave soon became a pilgrimage site for Christians.

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Freinademetz learned how to discover the greatness and beauty of Chinese culture and to love deeply the people to whom he had been sent.   He dedicated his life to proclaiming the gospel message of God’s love for all peoples and to embodying this love in the formation of Chinese Christian communities.   He animated these communities to open themselves in solidarity with the surrounding inhabitants.   And he encouraged many of the Chinese Christians to be missionaries to their own people as catechists, religious, nuns and priests.   His life was an expression of his motto:  “The language that all people understand is that of love.” … Vatican.va

He was beatified 19 October 1975 by Pope Paul VI and Canonised by St John Paul II on 5 October 2003, on which occasions he said:

” “And they went forth and preached everywhere” (Mk 16: 20).   The Evangelist Mark ends his Gospel with these words.   He then adds that the Lord never ceases to accompany the activity of the Apostles with the power of His miracles.   Echoing these words of Jesus, the words of St Joseph Freinademetz are filled with faith:  “I do not consider missionary life as a sacrifice I offer to God but as the greatest grace, that God, could ever have lavished upon me.”   With the tenacity typical of mountain people, this generous “witness of love” made a gift of himself to the Chinese peoples of southern Shandong.  For love and with love he embraced their living conditions, in accordance with his own advice to his missionaries:   “Missionary work is useless if one does not love and is not loved.”   An exemplary model of Gospel inculturation, this Saint imitated Jesus, who saved men and women by sharing their existence to the very end.”

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St Arnold Janssen’s life here: https://anastpaul.com/2020/01/15/saint-of-the-day-15-january-st-arnold-janssen-svd-1837-1909/

Saint of the Day – 28 January – Saint Joseph Freinademetz SVD (1852-1908) “Fu Shenfu” – Lucky Priest. Saint of the Day - 28 January - Saint Joseph Freinademetz SVD (1852-1908) Priest and Missionary of the Society of the Divine Word, the First Saint to Ever Serve in Hong Kong, Missionary to China, St Joseph had an immense devotion to Eucharistic Adoration - born on 15 April 1852 in Pedraces in Val Gadena, the Tyrolean Alps, Italy and died on 28 January 1908 in Taikia, China of tuberculosis and typhus.   

#stjosephfreinademetz

[famous-aces]

Henry David Thoreau

Who: Henry David Thoreau

What: Author, Philosopher, Abolitionist, Activist, Naturalist, Critic, Surveyor, Yogi, Historian...ah, Jeez, what wasn't he?

Where: American (active largely in the US)

When: July 12, 1817 – May 6, 1862

(Image description: a photo of Henry David Thoreau from 1861, it is obviously in black and white but has faded to sepia. He is a white man in a jacket and what appears to be a scarf or cravat. He has a long, tired face, circles around his eyes. He has a thick beard and mustache and slightly messy hair, his hair is dark but graying.  End ID)

You have probably heard this name even if you don't know why. He is best known  for his memoirs, essays, and his role in the founding of the Transcendentalist movement. His progressive philosophy remains relevant to this day. His influence has lasted well over a century and he served as inspiration for the likes of JFK, Martin Luther King Jr., Hemingway, Tolstoy, Shaw, Gandhi, among dozens of other names of equal note.

Thoreau was a Transcendentalist through and through, meaning he believed in the inherent goodness of humanity and nature in conjunction with science, and the power of the individual. His writing is generally practical, thoughtful, detailed, and observant, and he wrote extensively on a number of subjects. Perhaps most notably on environmentalism (he is one of the inspirations for and a precursor to the 20th century environmentalist movement), nature, ethics, simple living, direct action, civil disobedience, abolition, tax resistance, anarchy, among countless other topics.  

Thoreau's most famous and popular works include Walden, which is the published version of of the diary Thoreau kept over his two year social experiment at Walden Pond (written beginning in 1845, published in 1854), "Civil Disobedience,"  which helped both Gandhi and Dr. King form their philosophies, and states that in an unjust society the just must rebel, (it was originally titled "Resistance to Civil Government or Civil Disobedience", 1849), "Walking" an instruction manual on how Thoreau thought, observed, and wrote (1862), "Slavery in Massachusetts", a speech given at a rally to protest the re-enslavement of escapee/fugitive slave Anthony Burns (1854) and Excursions, collection of essays, published posthumously in 1863 with biographical introduction by fellow author and Transcendentalist Ralph Waldo Emerson.  He also wrote on John Brown and his execution ("A Plea for Captain John Brown" [1859], Remarks After the Hanging of John Brown [1859], and The Last Days of John Brown [1860]).

(Image description: a replica of Thoreau's cabin in Walden. It is a very small wooded. Cabin in a clearing, one room at most, brown/gray in color. It has a white multi-paned window and a brick chimney in the back. The whole cabin is not much taller than its door. Behind it is a shed or outhouse.  They are surrounded by trees. Touching one of the closest trees is a brown metal statue of a man walking, presumably Thoreau. End ID)

Probable Orientation: Gay ace or possibly aroace with a desire for a male QPP.

I am very confident in Thoreau's asexuality, if a little shakier on his romantic orientation. As far as anyone knows (and his life has been repeatedly and heavily scrutinized since the 19th century) Thoreau never had a romantic or sexual partner. He was a public figure with a wide circle of friends, someone would have known at some point during his life and if somehow a partner escaped notice the historians who dedicated their lives to studying his life specifically would have uncovered them. Thoreau wrote on male/male relationships, some more platonic, some queerplatonic, some vagulely romantic, none sexual.

Thoreau, like Elizabeth I, is one cishets hold onto, turning away from the idea he could be anything but heterosexual regardless of the evidence to the contrary.  Like Andy Warhol he is one exclusionists refuse to acknowledge was ace, although they have even less of an argument here. Many aphobic fans of Thoreau are terrified by the idea that maybe, just maybe, the thing Thoreau loved most was nature. Some outrageous arguments from either side include: one historian claimed a poem Thoreau wrote for a man was actually meant for that guy's sister, some say he was being hip in writing about Achilles, some say he was too repressed to have sex, especially since he was gay. One blogger got heated in his admantness that Thoreau wasn't ace but was "a human being with feelings and needs." Nice aphobia there, dude.

But here is the thing about any of those arguments: Thoreau broke every other rule in his culture. He was not afraid to be different, and separated himself from society.  He was all about the individual breaking away from society and its traditions and going with your human nature. Thoreau did what he believed to be right.

He had a following, many friends and aquaintences, almost certainly suitors, he spent a lot of time alone in the company of men he seemed to find attractive e.g. Tom Fowler (who was his sole companion and guide through Maine) and Alek Therien (who visited Thoreau alone at Walden). I firmly believe that his percieved "prudishness" was not artificial but came from a genuine disinterest and failure to even really understand sexual attraction (his journals imply as much, you will see). If he did sleep with any of these men Thoreau never documented it, not even in his own journals. But what he did articulate in letters is that society's refusal to discuss sex/physical relationships was proof of its problems. Sex was natural so dismissing it wasn't. 

His feelings about sex are contradictory, he thinks it must be natural but he also finds it repulsive and dirty. He makes note at one point of how beautiful pollination is (he is quoting and translating J. Biberg but agrees with the sentiment and indeed only uses the quote to prove his point on the beauty of sexless flowers), but he vilifies or dislikes human intercourse. Thoreau seems to like the idea of sex without the sex, he likes closeness more than intercourse. He wants to like sex but can't, the closest he gets is the desire for these things to be open.

Quotes:

Hang onto your hats. There are some long ones here, but Thoreau, like Chopin, is pretty overtly ace. Like he couldn't make it clear without waving an asexual pride flag, would be hard considering it was invented in what? 2010? And Thoreau had already been dead 148 chaste, chaste years.

"What is commonly honored with the name of Friendship is no very profound or powerful instinct...I do not often see the farmers made seers and wise to the verge of insanity by their Friendship for one another. They are not often transfigured and translated by love in each other’s presence. I do not observe them purified, refined, and elevated by the love of a man…I do not often see the farmers made seers and wise to the verge of insanity by their Friendship for one another. They are not often transfigured and translated by love in each other’s presence. I do not observe them purified, refined, and elevated by the love of a man…Nor do the farmers' wives lead lives consecrated to Friendship. I do not see the pair of farmer Friends of either sex prepared to stand against the world...Even the utmost good-will and harmony and practical kindness are not sufficient for Friendship, for Friends do not live in harmony merely, as some say, but in melody. We do not wish for Friends to feed and clothe our bodies,--neighbors are kind enough for that,--but to do the like office to our spirits…[the ideal friendship] will make a man honest; it will make him a hero; it will make him a saint. It is the state of the just dealing with the just, the magnanimous with the magnanimous, the sincere with the sincere, man with man.”

-Henry David Thoreau, from his journal 1839. This entry on friendship the hope for something deeper than what most people call by that name, but still looking for friendship. He is looking for a partner, an emotional, spiritual, partner. This quote could be read as romantic or queerplatonic. You know which one I am leaning toward, queerplatonic, especially because he specifies these relationships as unique from marriage (which he equates in other texts with sex and maybe romance) also he was writing while on a trip with his brother, John, to whom he would later dedicate the publication after John's death in 1842. But it could easily also be a sexless romantic relationship, what he is looking for is not explicitly either.

The following are all from 1852 letters written by Thoreau to his friend and proofreader Harrison Blake. One of these letters was overtly written on the subject of "Chastity and Sensuality" and contains his complicated feelings on sexuality:

"What the essential difference between man and woman is, that they should be thus attracted to one another, no one has satisfactorily answered."

(Note: self explanatory)

"If it is the result of a pure love, there can be nothing sensual in marriage. Chastity is something positive, not negative. It is the virtue of the married especially. All lusts or base pleasures must give place to loftier delights...The deeds of love are less questionable than any action of an individual can be, for, it being founded on the rarest mutual respect, the parties incessantly stimulate each other to a loftier and purer life, and the act in which they are associated must be pure and noble indeed..."

(Note: in the above quote he seems to believe that in marriage sex must eventually stop because there is something better. As if they have gotten the sex stuff out of the way.)

"Love and lust are as far asunder as a flower-garden is from a brothel.

(Note: this was part of his description for his disdain for human sex vs human love, his confusion about sex but love of human relationships. It is part of that desire for sex without sex thing I mentioned but harsher than his tone in a later letter.)

"'The organs of generation, which, in the animal kingdom, are for the most part concealed by nature, as if they were to be ashamed of, in the vegetable kingdom are ex posed to the eyes of all ; and, when the nuptials of plants are celebrated, it is wonderful what delight they afford to the beholder, refreshing...'"

(Note: this is Thoreau quoting and translating J. Biberg. Part of the same letter as the brothel line. In this letter he discusses how perturbed he is by sex and lust, but how it should be something beautiful. He celebrates pollination, while finding human sex distasteful, again sex without sex.)

"The intercourse of the sexes, I have dreamed, is incredibly beautiful, too fair to be remembered. I have had thoughts about it, but they are among the most fleeting and irrecoverable in my experience."

(Note: Also self explanatory)

(Image description: the original title page of Walden. It has an illustration on it drawn by Thoreau's sister Sophia. Above the illustration it reads "Walden; or Life in the Woods by Henry D. Thoreau, Author of "A Week on the Concord and Merrimack Rivers". Then is the illustration showing Thoreau's cabin, it looks very much like the modern replica if with a slightly different treeline.  There is a path leading from the cabin down to the bottom of the image directed at the words below. The text continues after the drawing "I do not propose to write an ode to dejection, but to brag as lustily as chanticleer in the morning, standing on his roost, if only to wake the neighbors up. -Page 92. Boston, Ticknor and Fields. M DCCC LIV.". End ID)

#lgbtq #queer #asexual #ace #history #gay #authors #19th century #american #north america #usa #aromantic #aro #activists #bio

[troybeecham]

Today the Church remembers St. Anthony the Great, Abbot and hermit.

Ora pro nobis.

Saint Anthony (January 12, 251 – January 17, 356), was a Christian monk from Egypt, revered since his death as a saint. He is distinguished from other saints named Anthony such as Anthony of Padua, by various epithets of his own: Anthony the Great, Anthony of Egypt, Antony the Abbot, Anthony of the Desert, Anthony the Anchorite, and Anthony of Thebes. For his importance among the Desert Fathers and to all later Christian monasticism, he is also known as the Father of All Monks.

The biography of Anthony's life by Athanasius of Alexandria helped to spread the concept of Christian monasticism, particularly in Western Europe via its Latin translations. He is often erroneously considered the first Christian monk, but as his biography and other sources make clear, there were many ascetics before him. Anthony was, however, the first to go into the wilderness (about 270 AD), which seems to have contributed to his renown. Accounts of Anthony enduring supernatural temptation during his sojourn in the Eastern Desert of Egypt inspired the often-repeated subject of the temptation of St. Anthony in Western art and literature.

Anthony was born in Coma in Lower Egypt in AD 251 to wealthy landowner parents. When he was about 18 years old, his parents died and left him with the care of his unmarried sister. Shortly thereafter, he decided to follow the Evangelical counsel of Jesus which reads, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasures in heaven."[Mt 19:21] Anthony gave away some of his family's lands to his neighbors, sold the remaining property, and donated the funds thus raised to the poor. He then left to live an ascetic life, placing his sister with a group of Christian virgins, a sort of proto-convent.

For the next fifteen years, Anthony remained in the area, spending the first years as the disciple of another local hermit. There are various legends associating Anthony with pigs: one is that he worked as a swineherd during this period.

Anthony is sometimes considered the first monk, and the first to initiate solitary desertification, but there were others before him. There were already ascetic pagan hermits (the Therapeutae), and loosely organized cenobitic communities were described by the Hellenized Jewish philosopher Philo of Alexandria in the 1st century AD as long established in the harsh environment of Lake Mareotis and in other less accessible regions. Philo opined that "this class of persons may be met with in many places, for both Greece and barbarian countries want to enjoy whatever is perfectly good."

Christian ascetics such as Thecla had likewise retreated to isolated locations at the outskirts of cities. Anthony is notable for having decided to surpass this tradition and headed out into the desert proper. He left for the alkaline Nitrian Desert (later the location of the noted monasteries of Nitria, Kellia, and Scetis) on the edge of the Western Desert about 95 km (59 mi) west of Alexandria. He remained there for 13 years.

According to Athanasius, the devil fought Anthony by afflicting him with boredom, laziness, and the phantoms of women, which he overcame by the power of prayer, providing a theme for Christian art. After that, he moved to a tomb, where he resided and closed the door on himself, depending on some local villagers who brought him food. When the devil perceived his ascetic life and his intense worship, he was envious and beat him mercilessly, leaving him unconscious. When his friends from the local village came to visit him and found him in this condition, they carried him to a church.

After he recovered, he made a second effort and went back into the desert to a father mountain by the Nile called Pispir (now Der-el-Memun), opposite Arsinoe. There he lived strictly enclosed in an old abandoned Roman fort for some 20 years.

According to Athanasius, the devil again resumed his war against Anthony, only this time the phantoms were in the form of wild beasts, wolves, lions, snakes, and scorpions. They appeared as if they were about to attack him or cut him into pieces. But the saint would laugh at them scornfully and say, "If any of you have any authority over me, only one would have been sufficient to fight me." At his saying this, they disappeared as though in smoke. While in the fort he only communicated with the outside world by a crevice through which food would be passed and he would say a few words. Anthony would prepare a quantity of bread that would sustain him for six months. He did not allow anyone to enter his cell; whoever came to him stood outside and listened to his advice.

Then one day he emerged from the fort with the help of villagers, who broke down the door. By this time most had expected him to have wasted away or to have gone insane in his solitary confinement. Instead, he emerged healthy, serene, and enlightened. Everyone was amazed that he had been through these trials and emerged spiritually rejuvenated. He was hailed as a hero and from this time forth the legend of Anthony began to spread and grow.

Anthony went to Fayyum and confirmed the brethren there in the Christian faith before returning to his fort. Amid the Diocletian Persecutions, Anthony wished to become a martyr and in AD 311 went to Alexandria. He visited those who were imprisoned for the sake of Christ and comforted them. When the Governor saw that he was confessing his Christianity publicly, not caring what might happen to him, he ordered him not to show up in the city. However, the Saint did not heed his threats. He faced him and argued with him in order that he might arouse his anger so that he might be tortured and martyred, but it did not happen.

At the end of the persecutions, Anthony returned to his old Roman fort. By this time, many more had heard of his sanctity and he had many more visitors than before. He saw these visits as interfering with his worship and went further into the Eastern Desert. He traveled for three days before reaching a small oasis with a spring and some palm trees and chose to settle there. Disciples soon found him out and his number of visitors again continued to grow.

Anthony had not been the first ascetic or hermit, but he may properly be called the "Father of Monasticism" in Christianity, as he organized his disciples into a worshipping community and inspired similar withdrawn communities throughout Egypt and, following the spread of Athanasius's hagiography, the Greek and Roman world. His follower Macarius the Great was particularly active in continuing his legacy.

Anthony anticipated the rule of Benedict by about 200 years, engaging himself and his disciples in manual labor. Anthony himself cultivated a garden and wove rush mats. He and his disciples were regularly sought for words of enlightenment. These statements were later collected into the book of Sayings of the Desert Fathers. Anthony himself is said to have spoken to those of a spiritual disposition personally, leaving the task of addressing the more worldly visitors to Macarius. On occasions, he would go to the monastery on the outskirts of the desert by the Nile to visit the brethren, then return to his inner monastery.

A background story of one of the surviving epistles, directed to Constantine I, recounts how the fame of Saint Anthony spread abroad and reached Emperor Constantine. The Emperor wrote to him offering praise and requesting prayers. The brethren were pleased with the Emperor's letter, but Anthony did not pay any attention to it, and he said to them, "The books of God, the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords, commands us every day, but we do not heed what they tell us, and we turn our backs on them." Under the persistence of the brethren who told him "Emperor Constantine loves the church", he accepted to write him a letter blessing him, and praying for the peace and safety of the empire and the church.

According to Athanasius, Saint Anthony heard a voice telling him "Go out and see." He went out and saw an angel who wore a girdle with a cross, one resembling the holy Eskiem (Tonsure or Schema), and on his head was a head cover (Kolansowa). He was sitting while braiding palm leaves, then he stood up to pray, and again he sat to weave. A voice came to him saying, "Anthony, do this and you will rest." Henceforth, he started to wear this tunic that he saw, and began to weave palm leaves, and never was bored again.

Saint Anthony prophesied about the persecution that was about to happen to the church and the control of the heretics over it, the church victory and its return to its former glory, and the end of the age. When Saint Macarius visited Anthony, Anthony clothed him with the monk's garb and foretold him what would happen to him. When the day drew near for the departure of Saint Paul the First Hermit in the desert, Saint Anthony went to him and buried him, after clothing him in a tunic which was a present from St Athanasius the Apostolic, the 20th Patriarch of Alexandria.

In AD 338, he left the desert temporarily to visit Alexandria to help refute the teachings of Arius. Although not particularly learned, Anthony was able to confound the Arians.

Final days

When Saint Anthony felt that the day of his departure had approached, he commanded his disciples to give his staff to Saint Macarius, and to give one sheepskin cloak to Saint Athanasius and the other sheepskin cloak to Saint Serapion, his disciple. He further instructed his disciples to bury his body in an unmarked, secret grave.

He probably spoke only his native language, Coptic, but his sayings were spread in a Greek translation. He himself wrote letters in Coptic, seven of which are extant. His biography was written by Saint Athanasius and titled Life of Saint Anthony the Great. Many stories are also told about him in various collections of sayings of the Desert Fathers.

Though Anthony himself did not organize or create a monastery, a community grew around him based on his example of living an ascetic and isolated life. Athanasius' biography helped propagate Anthony's ideals. Athanasius writes, "For monks, the life of Anthony is a sufficient example of asceticism." Asceticism is a lifestyle characterized by abstinence from worldly pleasures, often for the purpose of pursuing spiritual goals.

Anthony was secretly buried on the mountain-top where he had chosen to live. His remains were reportedly discovered in AD 361, and transferred to Alexandria. Some time later, they were taken from Alexandria to Constantinople, so that they might escape the destruction being perpetrated by invading Saracens. In the eleventh century, the Byzantine emperor gave them to the French Count Jocelin. Jocelin had them transferred to La-Motte-Saint-Didier, which was then renamed Saint-Antoine-en-Dauphiné.

Abba Anthony famously said, “A time is coming when men will go mad, and when the see someone who is not mad, they will attack him saying, ‘You are mad! You are not like us!’”

O God, by your Holy Spirit you enabled your servant Antony to withstand the temptations of the world, the flesh, and the devil: Give us grace, with pure hearts and minds, to follow you, the only God; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever.

Amen.

#saints #christianity #jesus #God

[thehauntrpg-blog]

Name: Reilly Joseph Carmody Age Range: 32 Gender: Male Pronouns: He/Him Occupation: Priest at the Church of St. Anthony of Padua Status: TAKEN by jules

You are a Shepherd of God’s flock, and you lead yours lovingly, no matter how small your flock may be, no matter how far they stray. Sallybrook is a town further from God’s light than you had ever thought possible, but nevertheless, you persist. You always thought your faith unshakeable, a concrete foundation built on the skeletons you hide, protecting you from the world — God’s light keeps you pure. Following the Godly path was the less frightening of two evils, and you’ve always been more petrified of telling the truth than preaching it. You wrapped yourself in a clerical collar and locked out any truths you couldn’t bear to face. Maybe that makes you a hypocrite, but you’re still doing good work, God’s work. You want to save souls, but this place… this place is wicked, wickeder than you’d ever imagine, and when tragedy strikes, a tragedy that, for a town like this, is as inevitable as the sunrise, you start to wonder if there are shadows even He cannot reach.

Isaiah: You hate to think of anyone as a “black sheep”. No one is truly lost, just… led astray. And to you, they’re a member of your flock that’s wandered, that’s gotten lost, that needs love and guidance and faith to come back to Him. You’ve got a little collection of stray sheep, and it started with them. Your door is always open, and they’ve crossed that threshold several times, looking for spiritual guidance, spiritual conversation… solidarity. You can’t offer them as much as they need. You can’t offer them everything you have, and that makes you feel guilty — and you think, maybe they can see through you. Not clearly. You’ve learned how to keep different things close to chest, smothered under your clerical collar, but you think they’ve spotted some of your hypocrisy. If you want to serve Him, you have to bring them back to God, but you don’t think you can bring them back to God without betraying Him, and that’s an impossible choice to make.

Alice: They welcomed you to Sallybrook with open arms, making you feel at home in one of the most alienating places you’ve ever been. You held their hand while they held his, and handed them the paper that would make him theirs; you also held their hand as they waited for him to return, letting their nails dig into your skin when he didn’t. They’re devout, and that draws them to you, but you’re the same and worlds apart all at once. They shook your faith, and now, you can’t preach honestly. You've never hesitated in telling your flock that God is Good, God is Kind, God is Gracious — but how can you look them in the eye and say that when you know, firsthand, that what they've experienced is a Godless act?

tw: Internalized homophobia, religious homophobia, religious conflict.

You were the fourth of seven children — “Seven’s a lucky number, you know,” is what your father said when someone commented on his brood. Seven might’ve been lucky, sure, but it was an odd number, and you were the odd one out as long as you can remember. Your eldest siblings, Kiara and Dylan, the twins, were closer than close. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum, your mother would tease affectionately. You remember hours of car rides spent listening to them bicker about which one Dum was. Your older brother Jamie was always popular, well-loved and athletic, playing hockey and football as soon as he could walk. Your little brother Conor was quiet but intense, as good a hockey player as Jamie, and took to mechanics even better than your dad. And then your two little sisters, Catherine and Chloe, close in age and in general, were too young for you to really relate to, and even if you tried, they seemed to speak their own language. So you stood alone.

Growing up, you weren’t… good at making friends. Not with other kids, at least. You were too sensitive and too independent for your own good — you sat inside with your Sunday school teacher, doing advanced bible study by yourself, while the other kids played outside, laughing and screaming so loud you thought it’d make your head explode. You always got along with older people, though. Your Sunday school teacher, your reverend, your regular teachers and your boy scout leader — they all adored you. But other children thought you were strange. When you were seven, your father told you why, and you’d never forget what he’d said: “You’re too soft. You’re too sensitive. You’re too… you. Be a little more like the rest of them, think a little more like the rest of them, that’s how you’ll get on.” He was right.

You were too sensitive when you were little, but you were smart enough to learn how to use it. Feeling for others was overwhelming, until you turned the dimmer down on your feelings; you built up a dam to stop it from flooding you. You quickly discovered that there was a power in knowing how others felt without feeling it yourself. You learned how to blend, how to act like they did, smother your own impulses and desires to follow the crowd, and combined with your quick mind and quirky charm, you started to lead the pack. You were never good at sports, but you were good at other things, and got as much as you could out of that — your magnetism and wit made you an ideal class president, and you were, six years running, all through middle and high school. You lead the school’s bible study, and was the go-to tutor for Religion class, your own devout nature making you a walking encyclopedia when it came to Biblical questions.

Devout was both an understatement and an overstatement, a duality that’s split you open your whole life. You were, unquestionably, a Catholic family growing up. Big, Irish, Godly. Church every Sunday, Confession like clockwork. You always had your shoes shined the shiniest, your hair the neatest, your smile the brightest of all your siblings, and your parents loved you for it. As far you fell short of their expectations, you were always their most faithful son. You’d never tried to miss Church, and you were always more than happy to participate, going from altar boy to leading the youth ministry. And you were a believer — how could you not be? You were raised to. God was in everything; He was ingrained in the fabric of your world. You truly believed, and you wanted others to feel as strongly as you did. But — you were also good at it.

You liked reading the Bible growing up. Your father’s den had a massive bible on this ornate golden stand, one you’re certain he rarely read, but one you spent countless hours flipping through. You liked hearing about Jesus’s teaching, liked reading the stories and learning the lessons. More than that, though, you liked the rules. You were the boy who always read the instructions booklet before starting a board game, who read the whole manual before daring to take a new toy out of its box — you liked to know. You liked boundaries, you liked guidelines, you liked how every piece of life could be codified, an answer to (almost) every question — it made sense, and it made a complicated, frustrating world make sense.

You were good at it, and you liked it, too. The pews of your church was more home to you than your living room couch. You never truly felt like you were part of your family — your father and siblings made sure of that. You were close with your mother, but she was exhausted, raising seven children, and only had so much time. But you were the only child who showed up early to Mass and returned late, just because you wanted to talk to the reverend for a little while longer. The parish staff became a second family; Mrs. Byrne taught you how to play the piano like she did for each hymn, and you would talk through lunch and halfway to dinner with Father Murray, asking question after question about anything you could think of. They paid attention to you. You realized you could find love, family, acceptance through the Church.

It was hardly a surprise when, at only fourteen, you first brought up entering the priesthood. It was a big decision, but it seemed almost natural for you, a born Biblical scholar. Your parents were encouraging, though your mother hesitated before embracing the idea fully. She, more than your father, asked you to consider your options carefully; to become a priest was not a decision to be taken lightly, it wasn’t just some job. She told you not to make any choices until after high school at least, though urged you to wait until you finished college before committing fully. You took her concerns to heart, and spent most of your four years of high school trying to make up your mind.

The final push came when your childhood best friend came out as gay. There’d always been something between the two of you — you had few friends, but he was your first, if only because of proximity. It started as the inevitable friendship of same-age next-door neighbours, but blossomed into something more; a meeting of kindred spirits, maybe. He was bookish and smart like you, but sweet, more easygoing than you’d ever been. You complimented one another, and that’s what made your friendship good. You first kissed at fifteen, tearful and afraid on the floor of his bedroom, door blocked by a chair. It was grazing touches, close-lipped kisses, so innocent it made you feel perverse. You couldn’t handle it. You couldn’t handle him telling people about him, because it could trigger assumptions about you — and if that happened, everything would come crashing down. The framework of your world, the rules you organized yourself around, would fall to pieces. For years, you kept the part of you that loved him and the part of you that loved Him completely separate, but when he came out, you had to give one up. You sacrificed him to stay in God’s light.

You’ve only acknowledged yourself as gay once. It was in your last year at Brown, applying to Harvard Divinity School. You were both an obvious Ivy Leaguer and absolutely not made for it at all. Your classic, Christian, all-American look and solemn, bookish nature masked the desperation you suspect lived in all of your classmates, the need for acceptance and prestige and recognition. You needed to go to HDS. You needed to become a priest. It was a key part of maintaining the elaborate net that was your life — if any strand broke, it would send you plummeting. You put a pen to paper, and for the first and only time in your life, you wrote: “I’m gay.” Maybe it was bullshit, pulling out your sob story, trying to use it to maneuver yourself to where you wanted to be, but that’s how you operated, and it worked. It worked, because you built from a kernel of truth. You did want to know how to balance your Catholic faith and your gay identity, you wanted to know how you could love God and He could love you when you also loved other men, you wanted to ask if there was a place for gay men in the Church, in the ministry, in the pews or in front of the parish. You wanted to know if there was any way for you not to hate yourself without losing your faith.

You wanted to know all of it, and that, you think, is why they let you in, but you weren’t brave enough to be the one to ask those questions.

Still, you excelled, and once you graduated with your MDiv, you started working in congregations around Massachusetts. Your first was in Cambridge, as a youth minister in one of the churches you did your practicums in; they loved you so much they demanded you do your practical training there. You excelled, your focus being reaching out to at-risk youth, providing programming, support and resources. From there, you moved to a congregation in Boston, and started an at-risk youth program that provided housing, food and educational supports in a faith-based environment. Your interest in social justice and social work made you a natural fit for that kind of environment, and you led with grace. Your superiors recognized your natural aptitude for working in difficult environments, and commended you for letting your faith lead you to those who needed you most. The first time you led a sermon on your own, your entire family drove all the way to Boston to see you, to pray with you, and you’d never seen your father so proud. It filled you, reinforced the feeling that you were doing the right thing. You saw your parents, your brothers and sisters, your nieces and nephews, all sitting in the pews, looking up at you with so much pride, and you realized this was the only path you could’ve taken. There never was any other option.

You spent six years in Boston, and whenever you came home to visit, you were your family’s pride. After all, there was no greater joy in a Catholic family than to have a priest for a son. You devoted your life to fulfilling a Godly path — and it wasn’t like your parents ever had to worry about grandkids, your siblings more than happy to take that on. The heat was off of you. As long as you kept the collar on, you would be the best son they could ask for.

Last year, your Bishop pulled you aside to speak privately. You felt a rush of panic when he asked to speak to you in confidence; while you’d gained the attention of your superiors within your church, you’d never been singled out by someone so powerful in that way, and for just a brief moment, you were afraid. You were afraid they found out… what? You were afraid they found something, anything, that could bring it all down — but it was just the opposite. Despite your youth, they wanted you to lead your own parish. The reverend of the congregation in question had just retired unexpectedly, and this church was… a special case. It required a delicate hand. Terrible things happened in this town, ungodly things. Witchcraft and devilry abound. You were surprised; you didn’t think this could possibly still be an issue anywhere in America, but he was gravely insistent when he asked you to take it seriously, and consider whether you were spiritually prepared to take on such a difficult task. You’d seen fifteen-year-olds come to you overdosing, helped countless homeless kids, watched your flock disappear to the streets or worse. You’d seen some terrible things, and you were still stronger in your faith than anyone thought possible. You were the only one they could think of to take on the Church in Sallybrook, and you agreed.

When you moved to Sallybrook, you weren’t expecting it to be… what it was. It was a normal town, sleepy, picturesque. But you knew what they meant. This place was out of God’s light. You felt a darkness as soon as you stepped foot in your new parish. But a woman greeted you, introducing herself as Alice, telling you she’d be your guide. She was your first friend, and helped you fall in step with this little town. You got to know your congregation quickly, and realized that it was an uphill battle you had to fight. People were afraid, they were grieving, they were hurting, and you didn’t understand any of it. You weren’t privy to a full understanding of the Haunt until it happened. By then, it was too late. You’d become entangled in Sallybrook’s weeds, and you couldn’t leave. Not after he disappeared.

Sam Davis was a sweet boy, one you saw often in Mass, heard running around the school. He’d grown close with Alice, and because of that, you got to know him too. He was part of the Church’s foster program, and it was your approval (in a committee, of course) that allowed Alice to adopt him properly. You handed her the papers yourself. And then, he disappeared. Whisked away, vanished without a trace. Gone, like he’d never been here in the first place. You stared at his empty seat in the first row of pews, the first Sunday mass after he went missing, and your voice shook. You spoke about God’s strength, His love, His plan — but for the first time in a long time, you questioned your faith.

It took you the year to build yourself up again, but now, you feel the same creeping fear as the rest of Sallybrook. You might not know quite what it is, or believe in the stories surrounding it, but you know it’s getting closer, and it’s going to take another child, ruin another family, whittle away at the hope and faith of this town. You’ve never known loss like this, and you can hardly bear being embroiled in it. You don’t want another one of your flock picked off. You don’t want to lose them. But you don’t know if you’re strong enough to lead.

#lsrpg #rpg #horror rp #town rp #skeleton rp #reilly

[satanseternalbenevolence-blog]

Memoirs of a Satan©

Hi, my name is Scott (You say, “Hi Scott”) and I am the new Satan. I have inherited the mantle and power of the Antichrist to do good in the World. Yes, you read that correctly, to do good in the World (more on this later). I don't know why I was chosen, maybe my core beliefs and understanding of humanity are the reasons why, or maybe I was just lucky. Either way, here I am, a 55-year-old raised Jewish (btw, the Jews don’t believe in Heaven and Hell) Atheistic Satanist from Los Angeles CA. I’ve often fantasized about having superpowers, but I never thought that I would actually have them, let alone become the most ultimate ‘villain’ ever!

Entry 1 I’ll never forget that day. The past few days the weather was beautiful, clear skies and temps around the mid-seventies. But by late Saturday night/early Sunday morning, a storm blew in from the coast. Pasadena, where my wife Beth and our two dogs Sophie and Sadie live, was expected to get up to 3 inches of rain, and after the 5+ years of drought we’ve had, 3 inches seemed like an ocean. I drove to work instead of riding my URB-E (Urban Electric motorized bike) to be safe. I work as a Security Officer at a Botanical Garden just south of Pasadena. I was at my post at the entrance of the gardens, under my huge orange Shademaker umbrella watching the rain pour down around me as I greeted the few visitors that come to the Garden on a day like today. A man walks up behind me and hands me a wallet and says that he found it in the desert garden and was told to give it to me. I thanked him and then went to examine the lost wallet. It was black leather, nothing special about it except for the fact that it was completely dry. As I opened it to see if there was any I.D. in it there was a number of credit cards in their appointed slots, and a card that read:

Hello Scott, you have been chosen to be the next Satan in this World. Do not throw away, give away, or turn this wallet into lost and found, it is yours now. You have every major credit card with unlimited credit to live on. More information will be revealed to you shortly. Your powers will go into effect in 24 hours. Hail Satan! Satan #30

You may be asking, how can you be Satan with all his powers and wisdom if you consider yourself an Atheist and don't believe in God or religion? The answer came to me that night. I slept like a rock (if rocks actually sleep), maybe it was the bowl of Dantes Fire I smoked before bed, but I was out when my head hit the pillow. In the dream I had, Satan #30 came to me as the devil character drawn by the artist Coop - red skin, pointy ears, horns, and goatee, and his signature cigar. He shared with me that yes, I was chosen because of my core beliefs and values and my understanding of humanity. He shared with me the history and understanding of this Being in the World. Man created religions and the Gods they associated with them. According to scriptures, God cast Satan out and gave him the power over this World. Since his power is in this negative realm, it is manifest as tangible and thus can make physical changes here. God is all speculative and invisible and does not have real power on Earth. Believers work themselves up into a frenzy because a preacher tells them that it’s the Holy Spirit working through them or they see the miracle of Jesus’ face on a piece of toast, but none of it is real. To quote the band Styx, “Welcome to the Grand Illusion.” The true paradox is that there has been more death, war, and destruction in the name of God, who is supposed to be the 'good guy' and Satan, the 'bad guy,' has been the one who brought positive changes.

The most important thing I was told to remember with this responsibility is to always be aware of how my choices and actions will affect future history. Yes, I can wipe out poverty and suffering instantly and make the ones who have been greedy and the cause of all the pain in the World pay for their crimes, but that wouldn't serve humanity in the long run. By manifesting such miracles I would be acting as a God and destroy the entity that is Satan. Giving the blessings of personal responsibility and cause & effect gradually will serve mankind in the long run. I'm what you might call a Spiritual, er I mean Satanic Lowrider.

I grew up in a very relaxed, reformed Jewish household. I went to Hebrew school after public school and studied for my Bar Mitzvah. In the Jewish religion, when a child turns 13 they are considered a man or woman after ceremonially reading from the Torah (holy scriptures) and collect lots of gelt (money) as gifts. Like most of my schooling, I squeaked by like the crackling voice of a young teenage boy. I was sent to the Rabbi’s office for disrupting the class so often you’d think we were having an affair. I would walk out of Temple singing the old McDonald’s commercial, “Scrambled eggs and sausage, yeaaaaa!” I was a bad Jew even then.

After my parents died at the end of my teens I became more spiritual and joined a non-denominational church called the Movement of Spiritual Awareness or M.S.I.A. I became a minister, chanted my tones, and did a lot of volunteering. I was really into it and thought that I had finally found my home and family, I was only in my mid-twenties. Everything was very ‘woo woo’ as I was sending the Light and ‘deflecting’ negativity. I was using all the lingo, “I ask for the Light of the Holy Spirit to surround, fill, and protect us for the highest good.”

As I grew into adulthood, worked a full-time job, got married, got divorced and lived on my own once again, the spiritual stuff faded from my life. I still wanted to believe that there was a God or Power greater than us but became disgusted by organized religion and their manipulative ways. Too many rules telling you how to eat, dress, and act (Fuck you, I like eating bacon!). I guess I was an Agnostic at this point. It took a couple of decades, but I finally accepted the fact that we are on our own, products of evolution, and proclaimed myself an Atheist.

When I met Beth at the end of 2003, I knew I had met my true Partner-In-Crime. As I was growing up in Culver City on the west side, Beth was going through much of the same family issues and cultural changes over the hill in North Hollywood. She also grew up in a reformed Jewish family and could relate to everything I went through as a youth. Although Beth does not like labels, she finally claimed the mantle of Atheist along with me. We call ourselves Deli Jews because these days we’re only in it for the food but still relate to our families as Jews culturally.

As I observed the changes in the World and started to learn the truth behind a lot of the things that society takes for granted - such as  thinking that our air is clean, our food is healthy, our legal system is fair, and our government is ‘For The People.’ I started to look at science as the truth and the way. Some people would call me a conspiracy theorist, but what is a conspiracy anyway? According to the dictionary, a con*spir*a*cy is a secret plan by a group of people to do something unlawful or harmful. Looking at the greed and manipulation of religions, governments, and corporations, I’d say there is a plethora of conspiring going on! So yes, I guess I am a good candidate to be the latest incarnation of Satan.

One of my first dilemmas was how to tell my wife that suddenly I am the embodiment of The Devil? "Hey Honey, by the way, you know that whole Satanist thing I'm into, yeah well, I'm Satan!" Actually, she was quite accepting of my new job title, especially the part about how our needs will always be met and we can live an easier life now. Part of the job description states that Satan's chosen family and loved ones will be taken care of as long as they respect the terms laid out by Satan. My siblings with receive the benefits of good health and enjoyment of life as long as they take care of themselves and don't rely on me to do it all for them. Here's an example - I may grant my brother good health and for every pound he loses, his family will also lose a pound until they all reach the healthiest weight for their size and body type. As long as they all continue to make an effort to live healthy through diet and physical activity the benefits will remain. If they choose to be lazy about it and expect Satan to just fix their lives for them, they will be on their own to deal with the consequences of the actions. That's pretty much how it works - take responsibility and step up to the plate and the blessings will be yours, choose to be lazy or arrogant, and karma kicks in.

Entry 2 Sure enough, 24 hours after I read that card from my new wallet, at exactly 12:00 noon, I have to vomit. So much for my half hour lunch. I spent the entire 30 minutes with my head in the toilet. At first, I thought it was my vertigo acting up again, but this was different. As I was puking I felt lighter, clearer, and freer than I have ever felt. I don’t know what was coming out of me, but I was glad to see it go. Once I stood up and washed my face, I felt like a million bucks! I thought to myself, that must have been my final initiation into Satanhood. So here I am, with the ability to affect people’s lives, and for lack of a better term change things in the physical world, but how do I do it? There was no instruction manual or advice from my chat with Satan #30 on how to do this. I kinda felt like Ralph Hinkley from the show The Greatest American Hero - here are your powers, you figure it out. I’m at work and now I am the latest Satan incarnate, let’s have some fun.

Part of my job is to make sure that people are wearing a paid admission sticker to enter the gardens. We close at 5:00 pm and stop selling tickets at 4:00 pm because it’s not fair to sell someone full price when they only have one hour to visit. Inevitably I get at least a few groups that come after 4:00 and want to come in. Here’s how the interaction always goes, I say, “Hi guys, do you have your stickers?” They reply, “What stickers?” I inform them that they have to have paid in order to pass this point, but we stop selling tickets at 4. “But we just spent X number of hours on the road to get here and we really want to see the Huntington gardens!” they exclaim. I explain to them that they should come back another day and plan to spend all day and that we are open from 10:00 am to 5:00 pm every day except Tuesday because we are closed. Before I can finish that sentence, they blurt out, “Oh we’re flying out of town tonight.” I always get frustrated because I hear this excuse over and over and over ad nauseam. Here they are with a smartphone in hand and they never thought to call or look up our website to find out what time we close?!? Today, I thought, let’s test out these new Satanic powers of mine <insert evil grin here>.

As I expected, at 4:15 pm a couple approaches, reads the sign on the front on my podium that reads ADMISSION REQUIRED BEYOND THIS POINT, and decides to confront me, “We just got here and reeeeeally want to see the gardens!” Me: “Sorry, but we’re closing in 45 minutes. I suggest you come back…” Them: “We’re flying back to Miami tonight. Can’t we just” At this point I thought, now would be a good time to test out my new satanic skills. I looked at them eyes wide, my mouth and left hand open, and then snapped them shut to simulate shutting their mouths with all the satanic power I could muster! Nothing happened. They kept talking but looking at me a little strange. Okay, my first attempt at summoning my new abilities didn’t quite work. “we promise we won’t tell if you let us in. We'll be quick, I promise. I just want to take a few pictures with my phone” “STOP!" I said firmly. Silence. “No, you cannot come in. Did it ever occur to you to pick up that smartphone you have in your hand and call here to see what time we were open until? Or look up our website? You show up 45 minutes before we close and it’s MY problem, what do you think, this is McDonald’s and you can have it your way?!?” This time they did stop talking, by the puzzled look on their faces and the impossible attempts at uttering a word, they couldn’t talk! So using my words of persuasion to command my power is one way of accessing it. Let’s find another!

I couldn’t get home fast enough. A gazillion ideas of what my powers were and how the hell I’m going to access them ran through my mind on my ride home. Usually, the 15 miles an hour of my URB-E didn’t bother me, but today I needed a rocket! Wait, I have super satanic powers, that  I - don’t - know - how - to - use. “Patience,” I told myself, I’ve got a lot to think about and fantasize about.

So this is the first time that Beth is seeing me with my new powers. She knew I was excited, but also warned me about going slow and keeping my satanic sorcery close to home and to not fuck with the neighbors (at least not yet). I stood there on our back patio ready to…I don’t know? Wave my magic wand? Point my finger with authority and intent? Use mind control? I started by thinking, WWSD - What Would Satan Do? Ah fuck it, how should I know? I’ve only had the job for a day, I don’t think I’m expected to know how to do it all by now. I decided to stop for now and go smoke a bowl of some fine Indica. 15 minutes later while laying on the bed with our dogs, I got it! Let go, detach, and relax your mind, then tell it what you want. Have two huge salads ready for Beth and I was what I thought on my way from the bedroom to the kitchen (all of about 30 ft.). By the time I stepped foot in the kitchen, Beth says uncontrollably, “WHERE THE FUCK DID THOSE COME FROM?” All I could do after looking at the beautiful salads on the table and turning my head to Beth was grin and wink ;-).

Over the munching and crunching of our scrumptious salads, we talked about how do I want to use these powers and do I want to go public with my new identity and keep in on the down-low. We both agreed that keeping it on the d-l would be the wisest and safest choice. I thought I’d start practicing locally, with my community - work, around town, and of course our neighbors. We love most of our neighbors, but there are some, let’s just say they could use a lesson or two about attitude and parking.

We live on a busy, main street that is our only place to park. The block is all apartments. Some of these neighbors own upwards of 4 or 5 cars and trucks! Not huge families, small families - parents and their two young kids, and couples. And, they don’t know how to park for shit - 3 feet from the curb, their back end sticking out, and parking in the middle of a spot that can fit 2 cars.

It’s a shame that there has been a rash of incidences of cars getting towed because they seemed to be parked in the middle of the street or on someone's lawn <insert evil grin here>.

Now, I know that part of the responsibility of being Satan is not just doing parlor tricks, so what else should I be doing with my newly acquired talents? The only one I can think of to ask is my predecessor, Satan #30. Before bed tonight, I took a long look at the tattoo I have on my left calf of Coop’s Satan that Beth and I got on our 10 year wedding anniversary. It was the first in a series of our tradition of getting a Halloween style tattoo each year to commemorate our years together. We were married on Halloween and love collecting tats, so this has become our anniversary gift to each other. Since #30 came to me like this version of Satan, I figured this would be a good way of focusing my energy on him before drifting off to sleep.

It worked. That floating, talking, cigar smoking little devil showed up ready to help. I found out later that part of your mitzvah (a good deed in Jewish belief) as a prior Satan is to assist the present torch bearer whenever they ask for it. My main question, aside from clarifying how to access these powers, was what is the best way to serve mankind (and not as a main course)? He reassured me that focus and a clear intent on what I want to create is the best way to access my powers, and to have fun with it (he forgot to mention that the first time we chatted). As far as how to be of service, his suggestion was to always think, how will this action benefit those involved? Even if my commandment is a form of tough love and is there to teach a lesson (as I did with the couple that wanted to enter the Huntington at 4:15 without paying), it must be for the highest good of all concerned. He also suggested I read the ENCYCLOPAEDIA OF HELL - An Invasion Manual For Demons Concerning the Planet Earth translated from the demonic by Martin Olson that was originally written by the O.S. (Original Satan). It gives some good insights into the truth behind Humankind.

I woke up refreshed and ready for my new job. After a nice cold shower, it was time to get to work. If my family is to be taken care of during my tenure, let’s start today. Our dogs, Sophie (a pit bull mix) and Sadie (a short-haired, low-riding Dachshund) are two knuckleheads that can be stubborn sometimes. I want them around as my Hellhounds for a long time, so they shall have perfect health, ticks and fleas can’t touch them, and they are perfectly obedient. All Beth and I have to do, is calmly tell them what to do, and it’s done - no fuss, no stress (for us or for them). I took them for a nice long walk. Even though I could now walk them without a leash knowing that nothing will happen without my consent, I didn’t want to break any laws. I put their collars and leashes on but had the leashes floating up as if I was holding them (kind of like the invisible dog trick with the wire in the leash). And I stopped picking up their poop piles. Now the canine logs of excrement instantly turn into the perfect fertilizer for the grass or plant it lands on. Happy dogs, happy daddy!

When Beth got home, we sat on the couch after dinner and discussed what she and I wanted in terms of our physical health and appearance. Obviously, we wanted perfect internal and mental health, but how do we want our bodies to improve. Beth wanted to slim up, clear skin and strength to do what she loves - hiking, skating, and exploring the World. I chose to only have a minute amount of body fat and more muscle definition along with the strength to keep up with Beth. To not attract too much attention, I’m having this transformation happen gradually yet quickly over a period of about 6 months, most people don’t notice anything odd about changes that take place over a slightly extended period of time, plus it will feel more natural that way. To not have to worry about vertigo, hearing loss, and erectile dysfunction, AWESOME!

There is one group that I’m involved with that I think might like to hear this news, the Los Angeles chapter of The Satanic Temple. I’ve been a member for about a year and a half and really love where their heart is. TST is doing a lot of work nationally for Freedom OF Religion and Free Speech, as well as the constant struggle to separate Church and State. The L.A. chapter has put on some fucking amazing Satanic Masses as fundraisers and as a way for people who feel like outsiders in society to come together and be accepted. I knew that they would understand the terms of the way I am to assist them, and that fact that we are going to have a hellaciously fun time doing it! To give you an example of what the Temple of Satan believes, here are the Seven Tenets we follow:

One should strive to act with compassion and empathy towards all creatures in accordance with reason.

The struggle for justice is an ongoing and necessary pursuit that should prevail over laws and institutions.

One’s body is inviolable, subject to one’s own will alone.

The freedoms of others should be respected, including the freedom to offend. To willfully and unjustly encroach upon the freedoms of another is to forgo one's own.

Beliefs should conform to our best scientific understanding of the world. We should take care never to distort scientific facts to fit our beliefs.

People are fallible. If we make a mistake, we should do our best to rectify it and remediate any harm that may have been caused.

Every tenet is a guiding principle designed to inspire nobility in action and thought. The spirit of compassion, wisdom, and justice should always prevail over the written or spoken word.

Quite a bunch of evil motherfuckers, huh? One of the things about TST that I love is the fact that they don’t worship the actual being known as Satan, they believe in what the literary character represents - freedom from oppression, knowledge, and fun, as opposed to the other literary character that so many sheeple blindly follow. Now they have the real deal, the definite article, the man-the myth-the legend - Me. How are they going to explain that? I’d suggest keeping this our little secret and have fun doing the good works that we do. They also use Satan and Satanism for shock value to demonstrate to not always judge a book by its cover - Satanist doing good in the World and believers in God doing horrible things in his name. Btw, Anton LaVey - poser.

I can’t help but fantasize even more about all the ways I can help people and right injustices without anyone knowing it was me. If I see someone being kind to another person, I might reward them by paying for his or her parking or picking up his or her tab at a restaurant anonymously. Maybe teachers who choose to teach the truth and not just the curriculum that they are told to teach and brainwash their students will be given the support that they deserve. I love to see children become curious and question why things are the way they are. Like training a dog with positive reinforcement, every time a kid helps another kid whom he or she doesn’t know well or stands up to a bully, they get an instant reward of some sort such as found money, a certificate of appreciation, or their favorite meal from their parents. If a driver steals a parking spot that someone else is waiting for, their car dies and has to be towed. My mind just goes on, and on, and on thinking of ways to be the best Satan I can be.

“Be all that you can be, become a Satanist!”

And just so no-one catches on, I’m going to do these type of things all over the World so it doesn’t look like wherever I am miracles happen. Am I starting to sound like a god or something? Maybe so, but I am Satan. Again, I love that fact that this demonstrates not to judge a book by its cover, that which we label as good or evil just might be the complete opposite. Positive chaos can be the perfect action to right wrongs and balance unsteady ground. What if people of different nationalities and economic levels came together and organized against tyranny and oppression? Hey, a Devil can dream can’t he?

There’s a trick I’ve always wanted to do. I saw it in the 1995 movie Powder about an Albino teenager with extrasensory perception and the ability to heal the sick. In one scene, the main character Powder is camping with a group of boys (I think it was the Boy Scouts or something like that) and their adult counselors when one of the boys shoots a deer with a hunting rifle. Deeply saddened by the event, Powder touches the dying animal with one hand and grabs the hand of one of the adults. What transpires is that Powder acted as a conduit so that the adult counselor could see and experience what the deer was going through as it takes its last breaths. It’s a true example of demonstrating empathy. I would love to experience someone acting like an asshole, insensitive, or being a racist dickhead and just shake their hand or touch their shoulder and have them feel what the person that they are picking on feels when they are treated that way (Seems like a very Jesus thing to do, maybe I’ll go easy on this one).

I’m not a sports fan, I believe that sports are another way for humans to stay divided, it’s that whole ‘us against them’ thing. But I do love wearing jersey’s, so I bought a hockey, football, baseball, and basketball jersey in my favorite colors - orange, black, and gray, with my name BERGER on the back and number 31 (get it?) on all of them. GO TEAM BERGER SATAN! Did I mention that I suck at playing sports? I grew up with asthma and couldn’t run, let alone play without wheezing and coughing my head off. I died inside during P.E. every time the coach would yell, “EVERYONE RUN A LAP!” Even now, I have no desire to jog, run, or chase a ball (I’ll leave that to my Hellhounds, Sophie and Sadie).

Entry 3 Date night with the Mrs., tonight we’re going to see DEADPOOL 2. We loved the first movie and have been looking forward to this sequel for a long time. As usual, we got there early enough to get some buttered popcorn and our seats before the 20 minutes of previews. We like to sit at the top of the theater in the back row if possible so we don’t have to listen to anyone talking or munching behind us during the movie. We found a couple of seats at the top on the left side, with no one sitting around us. The previews we’re okay, a few of them that I can never seem to remember when I leave the theater, I want to come back and see.

Just as the movie starts, these three Jugheads with enough candy and food to feed a small nation, sit down right in front of us. We look at each other with that knowing glance that a couple develops after being together for years. We silently decided to not say anything yet, to wait and see. Once they started feeding their faces they became a little bit quieter, since their mouths were full of junk food. But about halfway through the movie, the commentating and texting began. “Why the fuck didn’t he just kill the motherfucker?” “Dude, that's fucking stupid! He can’t be dead, and what’s with all this mushy love shit?” exclaimed two of them while the third kept texting with the clicking sound on his keyboard. That’s it, last straw, time to have some fun.

I had the scene in the movie stop, and Deadpool played by Ryan Reynolds breaks the fourth wall (in stage and film, that’s where the actor interacts directly with the audience), and addresses the three Jugheads. “HEY PEABRAINS, YEAH YOU, THE THREE STOOGES IN THE BACK WITH A SEVERE CASE OF THE MUNCHIES AND OPINIONS - SHUT THE FUCK UP OR I WILL COME OUT THERE AND TURN YOU INTO A SUB-HUMAN CENTIPEDE!” At first, everyone thought this was a joke and part of the movie, but this wasn’t a 3D movie and none of us were wearing 3D glasses either. When Deadpool reached out of the screen with both hands and his ‘avocado-had-sex-with-an-older-avocado’ face and came towards our noisy neighbors, at least two of them pissed their sagging pants and I think the third shit himself. They ran out of there embarrassed as hell holding their poop and pee stained pants hoping nobody sees or says anything to them. After clearing the air of stench and replacing it with a gentle floral fragrance, I allowed Mr. Deadpool to continue with his scene (only after Deadpool and all the theater attendees applauded the Jugheads departure). By the way, everyone at our screening of DEADPOOL 2 received a full refund and two free passes per person to come back to see another movie.

Entry 4 8:30 am. It's too early to listen to all the squawking going on in the trees around my post. From the sounds of it, you'd think I was in a rain forest and a predator was threatening the flocks. The only way I'm going to enjoy my coffee and start the day in a good mood is to quiet things down a bit. A little concentration and a mighty, "SHUSH!" and silence. Ahh, that's better.

I was reflecting today on people who rock the boat, specifically at their jobs. Maybe, the employees who challenge the system, question management, care about their jobs and speak up, are the smart ones and the ones to listen to. They see what’s really going on first hand (the boots in the trenches), and usually have very innovative solutions to these problems. The workers and management that play by all the rules, are calm and complacent all the time, and are just buying their time in hopes of a good pension to retire on, are the dangerous ones. The latter live in fear and would never rock the boat or go out on a limb, especially for their staff. The meek shall inherit the Earth if anyone would listen to them! Maybe now I can bend a few ears and make some changes.

I’ve got to stop listening to bands like Ministry on the way home, without trying I was hitting speeds upwards of 60 mph on my URB-E. Focus Scott and remember safety first.

Entry 5 I was thinking about the quote from the King James Bible, 1 Timothy 6:10, "For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows.” There has been a meme going around that states IF MONEY IS THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL, THEN WHY DOES THE CHURCH ALWAYS ASK FOR IT?. I found this to be a very good question. It sounds rather hypocritical to me - they preach the evils of the love of money, at the same time they keep asking you to donate it to the Church. I’ll bet that the Church's answer would be that they [the Church] are there to take the burden of the evils of money off of their parishioners. How fucking Christ-like of them.

Thank God Satan doesn’t have to ask for donations! I can’t see myself going door-to-door begging for change, “Hi, would you like to donate whatever you can to support your favorite arch-nemesis and fall-guy?” I’ve never liked the whole sales pitch thing. Even when organizations that I’ve been involved with called it ‘sharing your experience’ instead of what you are really doing which is selling goods and services, I was still hocking their wares. Isn’t Greed one of the 7 ‘deadly’ ‘sins’? Way to teach by example you cross-loving-self-righteous-robber-barons!

The Church asks for donations and tithing (giving 10% of your income), Jewish temples require payment to become a member, and Muslims are obligated to participate in a form of tithing called zakah. You can’t tell me that religion isn’t big business, this is a global money-making machine of ancient and epic proportions. Fuck the poor, praise the rich, and pray for trickle-down economics.

Entry 6 I woke up, made some deliciously strong Armenian coffee with smoked tea in the mix for an added flavor and caffeine fix, and started perusing Facebook. I started to feel discouraged by all the hate and religious rhetoric that is being vomited all over the internet these days. I hadn’t realized just how many people actually and wholeheartedly believe their chosen religion above common sense and logic. So here I am, the embodiment of ‘Evil’ on this planet, surrounded by a HUGE majority that believes that their chosen invisible god is the only one. I’m here to use my powers for good in the midst of this turmoil of political and religious power struggle which is purely manmade (kinda sounds like a comic book. I’m sure I can get Stan Lee to appear as a cameo in this nightmare of a reality, maybe as God himself and we can arm wrestle).

According to Wikipedia, Satan is an entity in the Abrahamic religions that seduces humans into sin. In Christianity and Islam, he is usually seen as a fallen angel, or a jinni, who used to possess great piety and beauty but rebelled against God, who nevertheless allows him temporary power over the fallen world and a host of demons. The Seducer, I like it! My thoughts on sin are that it is not negative, but merely human attributes. Seducing people to be the best self they can be (No, I am NOT plagiarizing the U.S. Army) sounds like a cool part of the job. Fallen Angel - well I am kind of a klutz, and I LOVE the term Host of Demons! I also like the name Satan because it only has two syllables. The Devil {3}, Lucifer {3}, Beelzebub {4}, they don’t slide off the tongue as Satan does.

I’m guessing that what I’ve been going through the last couple of days has been a ‘reflective time.’ It feels like I’m re-learning about myself all over again. I love the fact that part of the responsibility of being Satan is to keep yourself on the down-low, I call it Satanic Lowriding. The real magician behind the curtain, the master illusionist with a heart, the manipulator of mirth…Satan!

Entry 7 Sometimes I let the dogs poop in the house just so I have something to do that reminds me of the good ol’ days. They’re so well trained these days that it’s almost boring. Last night while walking them we passed a rather aggressive Chihuahua and it’s owner (is 'owner' not politically correct?), er, I mean person, that was so distracted by her cell phone that she didn’t even know her precious little pooch was acting like a terror. As we tried to pass, I had Sadie our Dachshunds eyes glow bright red and growl a low guttural rumble that meant, “GET THE HELL OUT OF THE WAY!” The Chihuahua got the message loud and clear, it yelped and curled up in a ball like a pill bug. Its person was easy, I simply killed the power to her phone, and then telepathically called her an evil demon and said, “Pay attention, Satan is watching you!” Of course, she dropped her phone in horror and looked around frantically trying to figure out who did this. When she looked my way, and I turned to grin at her with glowing red eyes to see her reaction - priceless!

Entry 8 I find myself asking, “WWSD - What Would Satan Do?” The Satan, Numero Uno Satanas, the OS - Original Satan, and how did he come to be? Did he just *appear* after his mention in the bible, or was it more organic like he was struck by a meteor particle? That must have been scary the first time he found out he had supernatural powers, “GOD DAMN IT, WHO THREW THAT ROCK?” Did he get tripped by a vagrant and cursed him, “May your feet fall off at the ankle!” and they did. I wish I could have been a fly on the wall the first time Satan read the bible. I bet Satan himself started a lot of the rumors and stereotypes about ‘The Devil’ throughout the Centuries.

At work, I was sitting there watching people shuffling around trying to figure out how to navigate the map of the gardens and what they want to see first. As they passed by, depending on their reaction to my greeting, I might make them lose their voice for about an hour or make some small physical improvement such as clear up acne, or even cause their clothes to fit them perfectly as if tailored just for them. I had a tour group of Japanese people act very rude towards me so I made them all speak Swedish for the rest of the day (that made my day a lot brighter).  

I know I’m supposed to do good in the World, but I can’t help but think that Satan was the Original Prankster. Maybe it’s that image of the devil with that gleam in his eye and that wink that says, “I got your back kid, let’s have some fun!”  

Entry 9 Aside from just my dogs, I can communicate with the other species of the animal kingdom. Sitting outside on the back patio of our apartment I was watching a crow on a power line cawing to the other crows in the area. He was looking for his murder (a group of crows is called a murder) which he became separated from. He must have sensed that I was looking at him because he stopped, turned his head in my direction and cocked his head to one side as if to say, “You understand me.” I nodded my head in agreement and calmly said, “Come here, my friend.” He flew down and landed on the back of the patio chair caddy-corner to me. We just looked at each other for a few moments as if we were two old friends who haven’t seen each other in years. I broke the silence by asking him if he knew who I was, he nodded and bowed his head in what I guess was a show of respect.

So I am able to speak English to animals and they understand me, and I understand them telepathically. I’m a real Dr. Doolittle! My new feathered friend cawed that he will let his murder know that I am here and to be of assistance to me and my family in any way they can. I smiled and nodded in appreciation.

Entry 10 Independent’s Day here in the good ol’ U.S.A. One tradition that I never quite understood was the annual hot dog eating contests where participants try to eat as many hot dogs as possible in a limited amount of time. The most famous of these contests are sponsored by Natan’s Hot Dogs on Coney Island in New York. Of course, small towns and cities all over this Nation have their own local competitions to see who in their community is the most gluttonous. Being the prankster that I am, I thought it would be fun to attend one of these displays of face-stuffing fun and hedge my bets, so to speak. Monrovia CA was having theirs in the park of the local library in the center of town. There were 8 contestants ranging in age from 18 to 70, both men and women. I chose the 70-year-old man who looked like a cross between Mr. Rogers and Ebenezer Scrooge. When the whistle blew the competing eaters started ferociously chomping on the pile of meat sticks in front of them. They had 10 minutes to eat as many of the 50 hot dogs in their buns placed in front of them with only water to wash them down. Of course, the younger participants started off strong, but then, thanks to me, my man started sucking down dogs like an alcoholic in a beer drinking contest. It almost looked like he wasn’t even chewing them, effortlessly letting those wieners slide down his throat. He finished his plate of 50 in approximately 6 minutes and then started reaching over to the plate of the girl next to him and started eating hers! The crowd was on their feet and going berserk! Part of the thrill for me was watching to look on the old guy's face as he was devouring the dogs in this meat-fest. Being the kind-hearted Satan that I am I made sure that the winner and all of the contestants had no ill effects from their gorging. HAIL THE HOT DOG!

I imbibed a little too much and tried to impress Beth by shooting bottle rockets out of my ass and spelling I LOVE YOU in the night sky. Good night.

Entry 11 It dawned on me that if word was to get out that I indeed was Satan and had these powers, I would be hunted by every religious whack-job on the planet. The fact that they had a physical target to blame all of the Worlds problems on, as well as their own personal shortcomings, would make me Terrorist #1. (I would make Hitler, Pol Pot, and Trump look like amateurs!) I’m sure I would hear everything from, “Children are starving because of you!” to “You’re the one who keeps taking my job!” even “The weather sucks today ‘cause of you!" If I was to get caught by these whack-jobs would they string me up and hang me, making me the ultimate martyr like Jesus, or would the military want to use me for their own evil doings? Now I know why I should keep my ministry on the down-low.

Entry 12 It’s hot as Hell today - pun intended. Temps here in Southern California hit 122 degrees in some areas, wtf? When did we move to Death Valley? I have a confession to make, I may be Satan Incarnate, but I HATE hot weather! Unlike old people from the East Coast, I will not be retiring in Florida. I’d be quite content living out my final days in Alaska (sans Sarah Palin and her dysfunctional clan), Canada, or the Highlands of Scotland. But since I was home here in Pasadena and off work today, I set the temperature in our hotbox of an apartment to a comfortable 68 degrees, turned off the ac to conserve electricity, and stayed in with my demon-dogs. They love when Beth and/or I am home with them, especially when I conjure up a big bowl of shaved ice for each of them.

Since we live across the street from the only Jewish Temple in Pasadena, I like to have fun with those obnoxious ‘chosen people’ who think that they are holier than thou. Tonight is the Sabbath. According to Jewish religious law, from sundown on Friday night to sundown on Saturday night Jews are supposed to usher in the Sabbath, or Shabbat as they call it, by going to temple, lighting candles and praying. Every Friday night it is impossible to find a parking place in front of our apartment because the temple goers have parked their Mercedes and BMW's in every available spot on the street. So to test their faith and teach them a lesson, I sent the most savory smell of bacon, ham, and shrimps-on-the-barbie to permeate throughout the temple. I’ll bet that the Denny’s on Colorado Blvd. will be filled with Jewish families ordering Moons Over My Hammy with a side of bacon and fried shrimp. You’re welcome.

Entry 13 - 9:45pm I decided to have some fun tonight. On the east coast, it’s 3 hours ahead of us here in California which makes it about 12:45 am. I used my Satan Sense to hone in on VP Mike Pence and Attorney General Jeff Sessions to make sure these two faithful children of God are fast asleep. I then telepathically visited each of them in their bedrooms, waking them as I appear as their God Almighty complete with white hair and beard, white gown, and puffy white clouds surrounding me. “I AM ASHAMED AND DISAPPOINTED IN YOU MY SON!” I said in a deep, booming voice. “USING ME AS AN EXCUSE FOR YOUR FINANCIAL AND POLITICAL GAIN, DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT I DIDN’T EXIST AND COULDN’T HEAR ALL THE VILE LIES YOU TELL IN MY NAME?!? THERE IS A SPECIAL PLACE IN HELL FOR SINNERS LIKE YOU!” Both of their wives also woke up, saw, and heard me alongside their chicken-shit hubbies so there were witnesses. Jeff Sessions actually peed his pajamas, while Mike Pence started sobbing and apologizing like a little kid that got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Will it change their stance on policies? Maybe not, but it sure was fun!

Entry 14 A First Aid/CPR class might not be the kind of environment to play around with my powers, but this particular class needed a little levity. First of all the instructor was an egotistical stick-in-the-mud who has been teaching these training classes for way too long, it felt like he was phoning it in. I could tell that most of the other attendees were getting bored and frustrated, so I decided to lighten things up a bit. The instructor, I'll call him Joe, was going over how to approach a person (the CPR dummy) who is unresponsive. His dry example of how to get a response from the nonresponsive person was the perfect opportunity. Just as he was about to lean down and give the two breaths, I had eyes, that wasn't previously there, open and look right at him. The look on his face and the girlish squeal that uncontrollably blurted out of his mouth was priceless! And just as quick as the eyes appeared, they vanished with no trace of what he just saw. The whole class gasped in unison and then broke out in laughter. Needless to say, we were all sent on a break after that.

* I put the 'lo' in El Diablo (as in down-low).

Entry 15 All fun aside, there is a very real and present danger to society looming over the United States - Christianity. With Trump and his right-wing cronies in the Federal government, their push to bypass the Constitution and drive to make Christianity the official religion in the U.S., the need for the varied people of this country to come together and fight this fascism is critical if we want to halt another Holocaust of that scale and larger. Those in power (governments, religions, banks, etc.) have been using the Divide and Conquer method to keep us separated and fighting amongst ourselves for Centuries. They use everything from a Bipartisan System, to sports, and even how products and services are marketed. Almost everything is modern society is designed to divide us up into more factions. Even amongst the same groups such as race, gender and politics there is fighting and turmoil. They want to undo decades of legislation to protect 1st Amendment rights, freedom of religion, gay rights, as well as the right to assemble. As Satan #31, I feel a strong sense of duty to support this fight and protect as many people as possible. (Crap, this feels like the most daunting tasks I’ve ever had to do!) Secularism is threatened every day. There is a movement in the right-wing community called Project Blitz. Their goals are to inundate government on all levels with Christian ideals, promote Christianity in public schools, and flood society with Christian symbolism.

I think I’ll start by more actively supporting the efforts of The Satanic Temple financially to assist with their growing legal costs. Next, I think promoting the After School Satan program and Women’s Reproductive Rights campaign will be important causes to help spread locally and nationally. Free and critical thinking should be offered to every child regardless of economic class, culture, or gender. Women’s Rights are a given, women should be recognized, heard, and fairly compensated for their active roles in society. The more transparent this work, the more people will clearly see that these Satanists are kind, loving, and compassionate individuals.

Now it will be much easier to send mass mailings, emails, and text messages to politicians. THE PEOPLE WILL BE HEARD!

Entry 16 Today I donated a substantial amount of money anonymously and specifically to the Security Department where I work. I stated that I wanted all Security Officers to receive a 25% raise, permanent structures in the entrance pavilion to keep the officers that work there comfortable and protected from the elements, and free ice cream for all Security staff anytime they want. The only clue as to whom this contribution came from was a note attached that said, “From a concerned Member.” That ought to keep ’em guessing for a while <wink>.

While I’m still working there I perform little miracles when needed, such as making people with faux ‘Service Dogs’ feel guilty when they approach me trying enter or causing the make-up of a model to run horribly down her face when she tries to come in to do an unauthorized photo shoot. One day I heard a call on the radio that there was a photo shoot going on in the Chinese Garden so I sent a small murder of crows to dive-bomb them and disrupt their plans (now THOSE would be some awesome pictures!).

Entry 17 I just had an AH HA! moment. It’s time get back on the stand-up comedy stage and influence audiences to the truth about God, Satan, and religion (Oh yeah, among other things I’m a stand-up comedian). I can write comedy bits about God and Satan interacting with characterizations of God being mean and short-tempered and Satan being as polite as an English gentleman. This is going to be fun!

Entry 18 The 'doing good work in the World' is the easy part. The hard part is using restraint when the urge to be painfully vindictive creeps in. Sometimes people piss me off so much that I just want them to feel the wrath that their behavior creates. Oh, how fun and easy it would be to make somebody pay for his or her arrogance, aggression, and stupidity for the rest of his or her lives. I've been finding that doing good work doesn't mean laying down and letting the negativity of the World walk all over you but sometimes using uncomfortable acts to get people's attention and wake them up. For example, I would love to set those people on fire who say to me, "Oh, it's not that hot today!" while I'm sitting outside in the 100-degree heat under an umbrella that makes it feel like I’m in an oven. But I hold back, and simply kill the air-conditioning in their office (only for a day).

Entry 19 Today I found out what scares the Jeebus out of Jehovah’s Witnesses, Me. 10:00 am there’s a knock on the front door. After carefully peeking out the front window, I open the door looking like Tim Curry as The Devil in the movie LEGEND. Red face and body (ripped I might add), goat hooves, and huge black demon horns. As I spoke in a deep rumble, “Good morning ladies, how can I help you?” smoke drifted out of my nose and mouth. They hesitantly offered me a copy of The Watchtower, which burst into flames and ashes the moment it touched my hand. That was all these Jehovah-Loving-Witnesses could take! As they turned to run away, they tripped and started crawling over one another to get away. I guess their faith wasn’t very strong. At least they didn’t piss themselves as A.G. Jeff Sessions did.

Entry 20 I remember once when I was in my twenties, I was assisting in a personal growth seminar - Insight Transformational Seminars. I witnessed a woman go through what they called Crabbing. Crabbing is when a person is going through a great deal of emotional release and their hands contort and stiffen-up like a crabs claws.

I can only equate when parishioners of televangelists go into those spastic fits claiming that the Holy Spirit is working through them, to Crabbing. It’s all in their minds and emotions, there is nothing spiritual about it. When believers claim to be possessed by demons and one of these flamboyantly Christian preachers ‘exercise’ the evil out of them, well that’s just bad acting.

My dear reader, you have probably guessed that I would treat them to a real possession at this point. Yes, but not the way you might think. I was watching the popular faith healer and televangelist Benny Hinn on television and he was going through his usual paces of knocking down the congregation with the wave of his jacket, er, I mean the Holy Spirit, when this one man claimed to be inhabited by an evil spirit that made him growl and bark like a dog as he rabidly showed his fangs (teeth). Just as Benny Hinn was beginning to ‘exercise’ this poor lost soul, I possessed Mr. Hinn. “THIS IS ALL FAKE YOU IDIOTS!” I exclaimed. “THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS THE DEVIL. I JUST WANT YOUR MONEY, AND STOP BARKING AT ME!” The ‘possessed’ man in front of me/Hinn and everyone in the television studio/church froze in silence. When I exited Mr. Hinn’s body I felt slimy like a snail. Of course, when Hinn regained consciousness he didn’t remember what just happened. The uncomfortable silence seemed to last an eternity until one of Hinn’s assistants whispered in his ear what just took place. Immediately the faux healer spoke up and assured the audience that there truly is a Devil and that it is more important than ever to $upport the Church. Sometimes you just can’t fix stupid. As for me, I need a shower!

Entry 21 I am offended that some people are comparing Donald J. Trump, the 45th President of the United States, the WORST President of the United States EVER, to the Antichrist. That idea lowers the bar way too much and gives this pee-brain moron extremely too much credit. The Angel that man has created to fall from the grace of their God in Heaven, the true Ruler of this physical realm (Satan), is in no way related to this pompous asshat! Cheeto-head also gives puppets all over the World a bad name. If Charlie McCarthy and Mortimer Snerd, Lambchop, and Madame were here today, they’d be on the front lines protesting this ignorant poser. As Satan #31 in these troubled times, I’ve got my work cut out for me. With the internet, social media, and international spy’s mucking up information to the public, getting people to think for themselves and take better care of each other is going to be a quite a challenge, to say the least.

Entry 22 Just got my 6 6 6 morale patches in the mail! I’m a Beast, Baby!

Entry 23 So rock music is The Devil’s music, well DUH! Who has had the tastiest licks, best beats, and most heartfelt lyrics? A: The Devil’s music. Music began as a rhythmic form of communication. Drumming, dancing, and chanting were all primal ways of expressing emotions and stories; both joyous and tragic. This level of vibration came from the Earth, from humans, from Satan. God and his heavenly hymns are lofty and boring. I love all the controversy about rock musicians worshipping Satan, selling their souls, and making teenagers take drugs and kill people. I’m actually kind of flattered to be worshipped for my music, but the selling of souls is waaaaay out of left field. Maybe some poser of a record exec. was playing God by requiring bands to sell themselves out to his label, but I have yet to come across any ancient or recent purchased souls in my Satanic studies. Teenagers taking drugs and killing because of some richly theatrical rock band and their deeply poetic lyrics? Maybe a closer investigation into the kids home life and relationship with his/her parents and their beliefs would give more clues as to the behavior of their gothic little angel.

You see, none of it is real, NONE OF IT. It’s all illusion, a stage show, a prop. The ‘good’ - church/temple/mosque, morals, the saviors, the good-guy-in-white, and the ‘evil’ - Satanism, paganism, horror movies, rock concerts - all fake. Humans over the centuries have given these things power by labeling them as good or evil, usually to use extortion to control the masses. Often times if you look closer, you’ll see that it is evil and corruption in the good, and goodness and kindness in the evil (ie. Satan here to do good in the World). I know that this pisses off the religious-right to no end because they think that EVERYTHING has come from God. God doesn’t exist, man has created the doctrines that generation after generation has blindly followed. You’re welcome.

Entry 24 Looking at the triplex we live in, I decided we needed some upgrades. First I talked to Beth and our neighbors about me doing some upgrades to the property such as the landscaping and painting the place as well as little repairs here and there. They were all okay with it. The only one who knows how I’m really going to do it is Beth, the rest I’ll have to make it look like I’m doing the work (it’ll just get done a bit faster than usual). Second, I contacted the owner, Barbara. Barbara is an elderly wealthy widow who lives in Santa Barbara (how ironic). This property is basically a tax right off. She hates to put money into this property and only comes to see the place every few years to do a quick inspection and then raises our rent. I informed her that I will be happy to take excellent care of the building and grounds if she would cut all the units rent in half. She was aghast at first and wrote me off as a big joke. I told her to come to see her property in one month, and if she’s not impressed the deal is off. But, is she likes the improvements I’ve made we have a deal. She agreed, probably thinking that she just got some free work done on the apartment complex she owns.

The first thing I did was replace all the pipes with brand new, larger copper ones. Now none of us will have clogged and backed up sinks and toilets again, and we’ll have great water pressure. Next, I fixed all of the electrical panels with more wattage and fixed all of the outside safety and patio lights, and then added some solar panels on the roof to lighten our energy costs. For the outside, I had all the bushes and plants trimmed and healthy in our new drought-tolerant landscaping. The final touch was painting the building. I chose an earthy brown with a sage green trim, very California (faux) Craftsman. Just to make it look like I was working I’d put a few ladders, drop-cloths, and paint cans lying around and did the whole thing in about a week (so it didn’t look too magical).

The day of Barbara’s inspection. The look of shock and then odd approval was priceless. I simply explained to her that I had the time and experience to do this kind of work and since all of her tenants have been long-term renters, including us, and weren’t planning on moving any time soon, I wanted to make our apartments the most comfortable and pleasant as they can be. I had a document drawn up putting this agreement in writing which she signed without hesitation. Home is where the heart is.

Entry 25 Sometimes I like to badger Christians on Facebook that post things about thanking God for their good fortune or sending thoughts and prayers. I will pose the question, what if God had nothing to do with it and those things happened simply because they happened? Their righteous comments usually are full of, “God gave us free will” “It’s part of God’s plan” or “God has promised us our place with him in Heaven for believing and loving him.” The more I bring logic into the conversation, the more they sound like a broken record (for those of you who don’t remember vinyl records, when they got damaged or scratched the needle would get stuck on that part of the song and keep repeating), but God, but God, but God, but God, but God, but God… I figure if I keep mentioning logical things, maybe some of it will seep past their brainwashing into their subconscious and plant a seed of free thinking in that skull of theirs.

Time to get off the computer, go outside, and help a little old lady across the street.

Entry 26 Bad parenting lesson of the day - keep an eye on your children at all times. After witnessing countless parents stroll along casually as their little angels run far ahead of Mommy and Daddy, I thought a lesson in parenting was in order. Just to be clear - no parents were harmed during this eye-opening experience.

<In my best Rod Serling voice>Two young boys, about 5 year's old racing each other a good 40 feet ahead of their parents on a crowded walkway. As they approach me, I wave to them with a hello gesture and *POOF*, they're gone! Not really gone, just invisible. Physically they are there, you just can't see them. I can tell that the boys themselves were having fun with not being seen, playing tag and sneaking around people. Just to add to the mystique of their disappearance I made them silent. Not only could you not hear their voices, but you couldn't hear their movements either. Of course, I was able to see and hear them.

By the time the parents of these two little ghosts reached me, I can tell that they still have no clue where their boys are, moms eyes were glued to her cell phone playing Pokemon Go and dad was taking pictures. I motioned for the boys to come over to me. I instructed them to follow their parents for as long as they can until they stop and wonder where you are. At that point, I suggested that they give them a little scare, nothing too crazy, we don’t want to give them a heart attack.  Their screams will be my cue to make them visible again. I hope those parents learned their lesson!

Entry 27 Oh, thank Heaven, for entry twenty-seven. I’ve always wanted to have one of those Candid Camera types of shows where you do something or set up a scene to watch peoples reactions. Now I can do it anytime I like. I love being out in public, such as at a farmers market, a bar, or a restaurant. As I walk past people, I would say, “Hello, I am Satan” in their native tongue. It’s always more fun when my target is wearing a cross or some kind of religious pendant. I love doing this to cultures that are very religious - Spanish, Italian, and French are fun, but the best is saying it in Latin. I walked past a superfluity of nuns on the street the other day, I made eye contact with one of the nuns, grinned as wide as I can, and said, “Salve, Satanas sum,” then I winked and blew her a kiss. The look of horror on the other nuns was priceless, the beautifully embarrassed blush of the one I had my sights on floored me! HAIL SATAN!

Do you want to have some fun? Here are a few that you could try out yourself!

Hola, soy Satanás (Spanish)

Bonjour, Je Suis Satan (French)

Hallo, ich bin Satan (German)

Ciao, sono Satana (Italian)

Salve, Satanas sum (Latin)

Usually, once the person looks at me inquisitively and possibly asks me what I just said, I just look dumbfounded and say, “I didn’t say anything” in perfect English.

Entry 28 I've noticed a lot of pop-up churches around town lately. Signs for church gatherings and services at other established churches. For example, I saw signs for a Presbyterian Church service in front of a Korean Church. They must be renting the church for their own congregation. My question is this, how many god-damn churches do believers need? And there are new ones popping up all the time - The Calling Church, Cenacle of Faith, TLC Church, but my favorite church is the Jews for Jesus. To the J of J, I say, "Make up your fucking mind!" Is the United States government just handing out tax-exempt status like candy on Halloween to anyone who claims to be a Church?

For shits and giggles, I had bumper stickers made that say, "SATAN LOVES YOU MORE" and I take selfies with it in front of any house of worship that I come across. This was inspired by countering the JESUS LOVES YOU signs that religious fanatics carry around in public. I now have a HUGE gallery of these pics. Maybe I should make a coffee table book of them and sell them, then donate the money to organizations like the Planetary Society and the Freedom From Religion Foundation.

Entry 29 I’m a huge star on YouTube, and nobody knows it. All of those videos of cars speeding down a street and suddenly get into an accident with what appears to be nothing - that was me. Putting invisible barriers in front of speeding cars is easy. Any video with an animal painting or drawing, me. All the paranormal shows and ghost hunters that experience garbled voices, cold spots, and an electromagnetic entity, yours truly. I love video editing, the way I do it.

Entry 30 My favorite saying these days, “It’s hot as Hades!”

Entry 31 Just for fun, I posted a photoshopped picture of a King James Holy Bible in a barbecue on fire. My Atheist friends thought it was funny, but I had some folks take quite an offense to it. I get it, burning a bible is akin to burning the America flag, two extremely revered objects that people kill in the name of. Would those offended feel better if I burned a copy LeVey's THE SATANIC BIBLE? I did it to make a point - they are just objects, physical things and nothing more. The value of these items is given to them by humans. I could take a 2 X 4 of wood and say that it is the most precious hunk of a tree on the planet and if I get enough people to believe me, then I have a sacred item - The Holy Post of Satan! If you burn my Holy Post, well, then you'll have kindling. If Jesus' bloody body hanging nailed to a wooden cross could be considered sacred, then so can my 2 X 4.

Entry 32 I wonder how many other Satans there have been, and what did they do? I feel like a new regeneration of Dr. Who but as Satan. This would be a fun trivia game that I could play by myself - look at world events over the Centuries and see if I can spot the ones that were facilitated by Satan. The Roman Empire? World War 1 or 2? Did Satan #30 leave me to deal with Donald Trump?!? (Satan never gives you anything you can’t handle)

Entry 33 San Diego Comic-Con International is the largest multi-genre entertainment and comic convention in the World, and a [relatively] safe environment for someone with actual superhero/super-villain powers to strut his stuff. Since getting in shape via the Satanic method meant that I could wear any lycra costume and look awesome. I chose instead, to go with the open shirt look of, wait for it…HELLBOY! Too obvious? Actually, it’s the perfect cover. When I make lasers actually shoot from a Stormtroopers gun, or make a kid dressed as Superman fly, they’ll never suspect HELLBOY.

I did it up right, morphed myself to look just like the Ron Perlman make-up from the movie, complete with oversized stone right hand and cigar (I love smoking cigars). I even smelled like roasted peanuts (hardcore fans will understand this). Personally, I chose this character because it just felt right.

Of course, Beth joined me, her hero of choice - Carol The Bowler from MYSTERY MEN. She looked great! She wore Dr. Marten’s, black jeans, the exact same jacket with the same patches on it, nail polish, dark eyeliner, dyed green hair, and without missing a detail - the enchanted skull bowling ball. Yes, I hexed her bowling ball prop so that she had power over it.

This was our first time attending ComicCon. It’s true, this convention has gotten huge and is mostly the entertainment industry buying and selling their next (they hope) billion dollar franchise. Regardless, the costumes of the Con-goers and hardcore fans are amazing! From toddlers dressed as the ‘mini-me’ of their parents' characters to the elderly wearing skimpy costumes that they probably shouldn’t be wearing, everybody looks fantastic and has fun posing with each other for friends and the media. One of my favorite groups that were there were the folks from Magic Wheelchair. They custom design motorized wheelchairs for kids with mobility issues. They do everything from an X-Wing Fighter from Star Wars to a Unicorn Princess, to a dragon or even a pirate ship, and they are all built by volunteers. The look on the kids' faces in their matching costumes was priceless (I’m such a big softy of a nerd).

Beth had everyone amazed at how she was able to make her bowling ball fly and control it. She was having fun flying the ball directly behind someone’s head and making it hover there like a balloon. When the unsuspecting character turned around, usually after someone near them told them to look behind them, they’d find themselves face-to-face with Carmine The Bowlers grinning skull. There were more than a few macho superheroes squeal like a little girl when confronted by his boney grin.

I kind of stood out also because I made myself 6’ 6.6” tall (Corny, huh?). I had the accent and dialect down pat. Some people started to think that I was Ron Perlman making a surprise appearance, even some of the event coordinators were on their cell phones trying to figure out who I was. One of my favorite things I did was to make people act in different ways as if they were hypnotized. I might have a guy dressed as Aquaman hiss and meows like a cat, or a Catwoman bark like a dog. I freaked out a kid dressed as Shazam!, when he started acting like the character trying to figure out how to fly, I made him levitate and then fly over the heads of spectators before gracefully landing in the same spot. (Speaking of Aquaman, I think I’ve got a man-crush on Jason Momoa) When I came upon the three guys wearing the Kim Jong-un, Donald Trump, and Vladimir Putin masks I couldn’t resist. I walked up behind them as they were dancing in front of a crowd and loudly exclaimed, “Well well well, what have we got here? The 3 Stooges!” I scared the holy dictator-shit out of them! “Kimmie, go suck a nuke. Don, ‘YOUR FIRED!’ And Pooty-Poot, stay out of our business!” The crowd went fucking wild! I love comic book geeks.

Entry 34 As often as I can, I like to go into a mixed neighborhood and wander the streets. Whenever I come across people, I like to just say hi, maybe ask them a question, and then shake their hand or pat them on the shoulder. Then when I do that to another person, I give them the power to experience some of what that last person I touched thinks and feels. You might say I’m sowing the seeds of empathy and understanding. No expectations, just spreading awareness in a friendly, social way. Imagine what could happen if in some of the poorer neighborhoods around Los Angeles the Latins, Blacks, Asians, Armenians, etc. start getting along and agreeing on things - shit’s gonna change real fast!

Whenever I travel anywhere I do this. I hope this awakening goes viral!

"He say I know you, you know me One thing I can tell you is You got to be free Come together, right now Over me” ~The Beatles

Entry 35 Welcome to Hell. I have found it, and we are all living in it. Yes, it is right here, our lives on planet Earth. Religion has convinced people for centuries that there is a firey place of hellfire and damnation that you will be sent to after you die if you have sinned while you were alive. Of course in some religions such as Christianity, there's always that loophole, or as I call it your 'get out of Hell free card.' Confess your 'sins' to a priest or donate a buttload of money to the Church and *POOF* magically you are saved! It's the oldest plot line in history - good vs. evil. There is always a hero and a villain, with their minions of angels and demons to do their bidding. This story of good/bad has been used primarily to control the masses. If you behave yourself, follow the scriptures of the religion you were brought up to believe, and don't question those in power, you'll go to Heaven. But if you think for yourself, question authority and choose to sin without asking for forgiveness from their savior, you're on your way to an afterlife of eternal pain, torture, and the repetition of your sinful ways (actually that last one doesn't seem too bad).

This existence we call life is either going to be our own personal Heaven or Hell. If you feel good about how your life is going, you could say life is like Heaven and you feel blessed. If you experience stress, depression, or anxiety due to the present state of the World at large, you are in your own personal Hell on Earth. What we, even Satan myself, choose to focus on will be how we judge whether we are living in Heaven or Hell. Don't get me wrong, I love the theatrics of Death Metal and Satanic Masses, but that's all they are - theater, entertainment, with lots of smoke and mirrors. The evangelicals love the drama as well, miracles and faith healing are two of their favorite things they use to exploit believers. Most religions use the image of Dante's Divine Comedy to scare followers into believing their rhetoric, which I find very comedic. I do love how organized Hell is. There are 9 levels called Circles of Hell. Depending on what your sin was, you are sent to the appropriate Circle. Lesser violations are sent to the upper Circles, while the hardcore sinners are sent all the way down towards #9. And then there is also Purgatory, which is a kind of 51/50 (72-hour hold) of purification before being allowed to enter Heaven. It seems like a lot of politics to me.

Entry 36 Part of the work that I do as Shaitan (word for Satan from the Quran) is challenging the stereotype of being the ultimate scapegoat for everything judged as bad. This act of not taking responsibility for one's own actions has been around as long as the good vs. evil plot line. It’s easy for people to pass-the-buck onto The Devil when things don’t go right or tragedy strikes. Geraldine Jones what famous for saying, “The Devil made me do it!” If this was true, I would have quite an impressive resume to brag about.

I love changing signs and billboards that blame The Dark One into blaming God’s Wrath. I saw a sign that read

GO TO CHURCH Or the DEVIL Will Get You!

So I fixed it. Now it reads

GO TO CHURCH Or God’s Wrath Will Get You!

Here’s a billboard that I saw

SHARIA LAW THREATENS AMERICA by UnitedAmericaCommittee.org

So I changed it to

GOD’S WRATHTHREATENS AMERICA by God.com

Do they want to play the fear game? I can play the fear game!

It has always seemed to me that when God doesn’t get his way or his followers don’t abide by his rules he punishes them, ie. the story of Noah’s Ark and the big flood. Satan doesn’t demand humanity to be loyal to him, he wants people to learn, think for themselves, and enjoy life. The people who invented God use fear and power to control their flocks, while Satan sings, "Come on people now, Smile on your brother, Everybody get together, Try to love one another, Right now” by The Youngbloods. Yes, it’s true, Satan is just a big ol’ music lovin’ mush bug.

Entry 37 My favorite actor to play The Devil on television is Ray Wise from the show REAPER. His mature, suave, and sexy look and demeanor was what I would want to be like if I was The Devil. Well, here I am, not exactly the Satan I thought I’d be. But it’s okay, I’m happy with how I look and my unique style. Again, like Dr. Who, each Doctor had his own unique style. I guess that goes for Satan as well. For a favorite movie actor as Satan, I would have to say Al Pacino in DEVIL’S ADVOCATE.

John Milton: Who are you carrying all those bricks for anyway?

God? Is that it? God?

 Well, I tell ya, let me give you a little inside information about God. God likes to watch.  He’s a prankster.  Think about it. He gives man instincts. He gives you this extraordinary gift and then what does He do? I swear, for his own amusement, his own private cosmic gag reel, he sets the rules in opposition.

It’s the goof of all time. Look, but don’t touch. Touch, but don’t taste. Taste, don’t swallow.*laughter*

And while you’re jumping from one foot to the next, what is He doing? He’s laughing his sick, fucking ass off. He’s a tight-ass. He’s a sadist. He’s an absentee landlord. Worship that? Never! Kevin Lomax: Better reign in hell than to serve in heaven, is that it? John Milton: Why not? I’m here on the ground with my nose in it since the whole thing began! I’ve nurtured every sensation man has been inspired to have! I cared about what he wanted and I never judged him. Why? Because I never rejected him, in spite of all his imperfections! I’m a fan of man! I’m a humanist. Maybe the last humanist. Who, in their right mind, Kevin, could possibly deny the 20th century was entirely mine? All of it, Kevin! All of it!Mine! I’m peaking, Kevin. It’s my time now. It’s our time.

Entry 38 I’m finding that even in Satanism there is angst and fighting between sects. It’s sad when even groups that truly want to do good in the world are corrupted by greed and power. Too many rules and doctrines end up working against the organization that is implementing them (see The Catholic Church). Here is another example of how the trickle-down effect doesn’t work. The people who occupy the upper-echelon want to stay at the top. Giving it away may sound Saintly, but I guarantee they would rather continue their comfortable, lush lifestyle than live like the majority of society. To soothe their guilty conscious, they donate scraps of money to charities that they deduct on their taxes.

If I become aware of this kind of selfish behavior, I like to make their generous ‘contribution’ check bounce, or their wire transfer fail. Not that I want to keep support from these charities, I would just rather them come from a more honest source, such as me.

Entry 39 Amorphophallus Titanum, aka The Corpse Flower. n. Latin: amorphos (without form, misshapen), phallos (penis), and titanum (giant). The flower gets its nickname from the pungent odor similar to rotting meat or a decaying corpse.

Lil’ Stinky as we call it at the Garden is quite popular when it blooms, which seems to happen anytime within an approximate 4 to 20 year period depending on the environment and conditions. The gardens become a media circus, and people waiting with bated breath to see and smell this natural wonder.

Just last week ol’ Stinky started to open, so the folks in the Botanical Department put it out on display and alerted the media. The biggest question of the week has been, “Has it bloomed yet?” When it does, hordes stand in line for hours to get a picture and a nauseating whiff of this infamous smelly penis flower.

I decided to take this display of [morbid] botanical beauty to the next level. I waited until Saturday to begin the facilitating process, since there will be more visitors, and there also happens to be a Members Summer Concert that night as well. Not only did Lil’ Stinky open, but grew to a size of over 20 feet in a matter of hours. Along with the size increasing exponentially, the odor intensified tenfold! Breathing inside the conservatory where it is housed and displayed, was almost impossible. About 1 in every 3 people lost-their-lunch, which just added to the death-like stench. They actually had to close down the viewing in order to clean up the mess and get some fresh air in there.

And, it was I that called the good folks at The Guinness Book of World Records. You’re welcome.

Entry 40 Often throughout my life, I’ve felt that one of my roles as this character I call me has been to act as a catalyst for change. Not necessarily earth-shaking events, but a change in policy, thoughts, or relationships. Many times when I’ve been involved in an organization, whether as an employee or a volunteer, major shifts take place during my stint with them. Sometimes it has manifested as a physical move to a different location or a change in policies. Roles and relationships change. I’m not saying that (up until now) I have consciously been making these shifts happen, but in hindsight, there has definitely been a pattern.

With the influence I have as Satan, this trend will continue, but more intentionally. Lately, I’ve been going to jails and prisons as a volunteer to simply talk to inmates and give them a chance to interact with someone other than fellow inmates and guards. Many of them don’t have friends, family, or a spouse to visit them. By being a neutral sounding board for them who doesn’t judge them is a great gesture in and of itself. I assist them a bit further by clearing their consciousness a bit more about life and the choices that they have made and why they are there. Sometimes this extra assistance bleeds over to some of the others incarcerated as well as some of the guards (oops, my bad).

Personally, I would love to see all of these for-profit prisons to go out of business. The less innocent people and low-offense (such as marijuana and drug abuse) folks are locked up, the more people in society to make positive changes in the world. Crooked politicians who are invested in these human money machines will be financially pinched hard by the loss of their inhumane investment.

Entry 41 God of the Bible (Old and New Testament) judges and punishes man, Satan accepts and supports Man in his efforts to enjoy and thrive in life. Just the simple fact that God is nothing more than a concept of man’s construct mostly used to control the masses, and Satan has been a tangible force doing good in the world says a lot. We are actually living in, as best as I can describe it, a reality that is more like the Upside Down from the series Stranger Things than we think. Here, people believe that God is good, Devil is bad. Yet there has always been more harm done in the name of God than anything that the Satanic Panic has ever yielded. Crucifixion, the Crusades, and the Republican Party are good examples of this. Whereas Witches, Pagans, and Satanists have been blamed for everything from bad crops to Smallpox, to the weather. Pills are good for you, but a plant is a drug. Priests are not Pedophiles, but Heavy Metal music makes kids kill. Trump is smart, while the press is fake news. Actors make good politicians, while kids who survive school shootings are called Crisis Actors. White is the new Black, and Brown is the new bad guy.

Don’t blindly believe everything that you’ve been taught your whole life. Do some research. Allow yourself the opportunity to see things through someone else’s eyes. Ask yourself, “What if what I know about something is the complete opposite?” What if Hell was a spa, and Heaven was a desolate, frozen and dead landscape? Be careful of labels.

Entry 42 Lettuce Prey. A favorite meme of many a Satanist on social media. There is a growing movement of Atheists and other secular groups that are attacking the concept of prayer to fix things such as natural disasters and ill-health. I just watched a satirical video about praying the gay away.

pray: verb - address a solemn request or expression of thanks to a deity or other object of worship.

Expecting an invisible being to adhere to your requests because you believe in them is as naive and childish as thinking that the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny are real. I’ve heard God described as not being ‘the Great Bellhop in the sky.’ Humankind has always seemed to place its faith in events and changes outside of itself.

So my question is this, what about the myths of people selling their souls to the Devil in exchange for talent, wealth, and power? Blues guitarist Robert Johnson supposedly met the Devil at the crossroads and sold his soul in exchange for being a virtuoso on the guitar, and thus made him a blues legend. I’m beginning to think that it really was The Devil that granted Mr. Johnson his extraordinary talents, as far as the soul-selling thing, I don’t know. If it’s true that humans souls are only their emotional reaction to things such as music, and that there is no otherworldly destination called Hell, maybe the Satan at that time was playing along with the whole Heaven and Hell story to bestow those talents to Robert Johnson simply because Satan loves the Blues.

I personally think the theatrics of pleading your case to The Devil and signing a contract with too much fine print, in blood, is very entertaining. Does it mean anything? Hell no! Plus, it would put you, as Satan, directly in the spotlight and might undermine your work to do good in the world.

Entry 43 I heard from Satan #30 last night in my dreams. He came through in the middle of a pee-dream (a dream that has some urgency to it in hopes of waking you up to go to the bathroom) where I was frantically trying to get somewhere on my URB-E but could never quite make it. There he was, at every stop that I thought had a bathroom. He was just checking on me to see if I had any questions or needed any assistance. I actually said, “Where the fuck is a bathroom around here?!?” He replied, “Down the hall on the right.” After acknowledging his answer with gratitude, the only thing I wanted to know was, am I doing it right? Was I doing enough with these Satanic powers? Should I kick it up a notch? Do I look good in red? He reassured me that I was doing great and reminded me to continue to have fun with this ‘work,’ actions speak louder than words, and [almost] always use caution. He then vanished, leaving me with a full bladder and a comforted mind.

Fully awake, standing over the toilet relieving myself and smiling. Today is going to be a delicious day!

Entry 44 "Now his holiest books have been trampled upon No contract that he signed was worth that what it was written on He took the crumbs of the world and he turned it into wealth Took sickness and disease and he turned it into health He's the neighborhood bully.

What's anybody indebted to him for? Nothing, they say. He just likes to cause war Pride and prejudice and superstition indeed  They wait for this bully like a dog waits for feed He's the neighborhood bully.

What has he done to wear so many scars? Does he change the course of rivers? Does he pollute the moon and stars? Neighborhood bully, standing on the hill  Running out the clock, time standing still Neighborhood bully."

I love the lyrics to many of Bob Dylan's songs, especially Neighborhood Bully on his INFIDELS album. These are the last three verses of the song. I can't help but wonder whom Dylan was thinking of as the neighborhood bully in this song, Satan? Is Satan really such a bad guy, or has he just been labeled as the Neighborhood Bully of the World?

~

Yesterday Beth expressed to me that I don't look like The Dark Lord and I agreed, I look more like Gimli from the Lord of the Rings with a farmers tan, the only things dark on me are my arms and face.

Entry 45 This entry I dedicate to the 45th President of the United States, no really, this is the best dedication. I know dedications, I've dedicated billions and billions of dedications for many many years. I got good dedications. I am the best dedicator ever.

Just kidding! That bloated-orange headed-fast food chomping-megalomaniac who is being referred to as the evilest man on the planet is giving Satan a bad name! Maybe another nickname such as Purgatory Pete, or Donald the Damned, or simply Scum of the Earth might fit him better.

I did give him food poisoning from one of his two Big Macs, and both of his Filet-o-Fish sandwiches (this is only one meal), 3 out of 4, I was feeling generous.

Entry 46 Thanks to centuries of religious doctrines, the vast majority of people on this planet are lemmings, blindly believing anything that their holy men, politicians, and advertisers tell them. They have been trained to obey, spend more money than they have (aka credit and loans), and feel overly righteous about their culture. How does one motivate folks to think for themselves and put their differences aside?

I could help promote Dan Barker’s book - GOD The Most Unpleasant Character In All Fiction. Mr. Barker basically uncovers and highlights the vast number of times GOD is jealous, petty, unjust; an unforgiving control-freak; a vindictive bloodthirsty ethnic cleanser; a misogynistic, homophobic, racist, infanticidal, genocidal, filicidal, pestilential, megalomaniacal, sadomasochistic, capriciously, and a malevolent bully in the Old Testament. This ought to open their eyes and get someone’s panties in a bunch.

After finding out in the news that Howard Lorber, the Executive Chairman of Nathan’t Famous Inc. (the makers of Nathan’s Famous Hot Dogs) was hosting a fundraiser in the Hamptons for President Trump, I thought that tainting the production of some all-America hot dogs would be a good place to start to add fuel to this fire. Choke on it, Mr. Lorber! (Hmmm, I seem to be feeling rather wrathful lately)

Entry 47 And on His 6th and 7th days, Satan rested, because those were His days off from his day job. Not that I didn’t do any good deeds, I just chill-out the most on those days; smoke pot, do a bit of cleaning around the house, fix potholes in the street we live on, smoke some more pot, nap with the dogs, cook dinner, and wipe the sweat off of my brow.

Just thought of an awesome slogan to fit-in with today's generation - SATAN IS MY SUPERHERO. Maybe we’ll start with bumper stickers, then t-shirts, hats, and capes!

Entry 48 This is going to sound odd, but as of late I have decided to not continue as a member of The Satanic Temple. Wait, Satan doesn’t want to be a member of The SATANIC Temple??? Yes, it’s true. I found out that there was a power struggle going on between the higher-up and the local chapters, so following many other Satanists, I quit. Like the rest of TST expats, I still believe in their mission and the 7 tenets, but being a part of this organization is not working for me if you get my drift (Now THERE’S a statement that shows my age!).

I’ve learned about myself that I don’t seem to last very long in an organization.  I’m kind of a lone wolf in a way. I also tend to become a catalyst for change wherever I am. Just recently I have accepted this fact as well as fully embrace it.

Entry 49 If I ever start my own metal band, I’ve got the perfect name: SEB - Satan’s Eternal Benevolence (How’s that for getting personal?!?). I’ll be the lead singer, maybe I can get Robert Trujillo (Metallica) to play bass, Kerry King (Slayer) and John 5 (Rob Zombie) on guitars, and my cousin Rod Morgenstein (Dixie Dregs, Winger) and Dave Grohl (Nirvana, Foo Fighters) on drums. Oh sweet the sound. Our first single - Satan Loves You More is a counter-attack to the signs, Jesus loves you, that believers like to carry around.

Entry 50 Captains Log - August 20, 2018: I’ve seen more SATAN LOVES YOU MORE stickers all around town from Pasadena to Downtown Los Angeles, the San Fernando Valley, and all the way down to Redondo Beach. Your boy gets around! Almost like a subliminal message planting a seed in their subconscious, I’m letting them know that I am there for them.

Mikey ‘The Good Christian’ Pence has been spouting off lately again. He’s still pushing for creationism to be taught in public schools, wants the government to pay for gay conversion therapy, and hinted that condoms are ‘too modern’ and ‘too liberal.’ I guess my last visit as his Almighty God didn’t get through to him, time for a more direct approach. From now on, every time Mikey mentions God, the Bible, or utters the word Christian his ass from his tight little butthole, to his cheeks, and around to his tiny little pee pee will burn like the fires of Hell that he is so damn afraid of. I guess you could say he’ll be a real Royal Flush. He’ll look like the poster boy for Red Devil Fireworks. Matadores will yell OLE! and bulls will want to gouge him with their horns. Latin Americans will call him El Diablo (Wait, I take offense to that!). This ought to be fun to watch - the VP is going to go viral!

Entry 51 On my playlist these days:

PIG - The Gospel, Risen

FIVE FINGER DEATH PUNCH - And Justice For None, Got Your Six, War Is The Answer, The Wrong Side Of Heaven And The Righteous Side Of Hell

PINK FLOYD - The Final Cut

Entry 52 ’Hackers’ <wink, wink> deleted the credit card debt of hundreds of thousands of credit card users, mostly VISA, MASTERCARD, and DISCOVER. A good majority of AMERICAN EXPRESS cardholders can afford their debt so they can keep it.

A homeboy was pulled over on the side of the street having car problems with his lowered, gold Chevy Impala, so as I rode by on my URB-E I nodded to him and fixed his ride instantaneously. Without even questioning what just happened, he simply gave me a nod of approval and thanks. Maybe it was my motorcycle helmet with the three devil horns mounted on it, but there was a sense of respect at that moment.

Entry 53 I had another visit from Satan #30 last night, he was just checking in on me (WOW, the Satanic support staff is AWESOME!). I shared with him that I’m getting the hang of doing the Devil’s work and I wish I could do more. He reassured me that patience is one of Satan’s best friends, but to be very aware of Vampires. I asked him if Vampires actually existed, and he was extremely assuring that they did. He said that they have been on this planet as long as man has, and as man evolved so did they. Over time they have learned techniques to blend in with mankind and improve their tactics on how to not only survive but thrive. They’ve learned how to suck the life out of someone, yet keep them alive and craving more from their vampire. This species of vampires is one of the worst. The Latin name for these vile creatures is Vampires de Emotus, or more commonly know as Emotional Vampires.

Emotional Vampires, along with their close cousins the Mental Vampires, will suck the will to live right out of you. At first, they seem like a friend or relative that is going through some frustrating issues, but the moment you step in to help, they trap you and slowly begin torturing you with their long and drawn out monologues of woe-is-me. You want to escape their grasp, but guilt overcomes you and feeds off of your decency as a human being. *Note to self: unfriend 80% of my friends list on Facebook.

Entry 54 There is a small group of homeless folks that make camp by the Gold Line Metro Station on Allen Ave. I ride past them daily on my way to work. They recognize me and wave in appreciation of my acknowledging them. They are never hostile or beg for money from me, it’s like we are neighbors seeing each other around the same time each day. The most social of the group is a guy that goes by the nickname Chuckhead (I didn’t ask.) He’s a tall - 6’5”, broad-shouldered and bald rock of a man, and also one of the kindest and most genuine I’ve ever met. Chuckhead told me that he was a steelworker from Pennsylvania, but when worked dried up because of Trump messing around with tariffs, he moved out west. With no money and no permanent address, it’s been hard to get a job and find a place to live. He hooked up with this bunch as a way to always have somebody to watch your back and what little stuff you might have.

I set up accounts with Dominos Pizza, Vons, and Jameson Brown Coffee Roaster and have them deliver to Chuckhead on a regular basis. I explained to Chuckhead that I’m doing this to assist them in taking care of themselves while living on the streets. I simply asked that they use their strength find something to do for money, that is legal, and that they feel good about themselves for doing something for themselves.

Funny thing, people in trucks and vans started coming around looking for laborers to do yard work or help someone move, hmm.

Entry 55 There is a kind of Universal Knowledge that Satan has the ability to access. It's like tapping into a vast database of history and current knowledge, sort of like how the human subconscious records everything that a person thinks, feels, and experiences, but on an infinite scale. I started to notice that when I wondered about something I would get an answer. After a little bit of investigation, I found out that this is true and started testing it. Often. This is like having the fastest internet connection you could imagine but in your head.

Entry 56 The other day I watched a DIY video demonstrating how to make a magic [looking] wand from a chopstick using a glue gun and some paint. I thought, how fun would it be to have a cheesy little wand that I can do actual magic with. No one will ever suspect that a homemade magic wand made out of the finest disposable pine chopsticks would actually be able to perform real magic. I can make up wizarding sounding words such as, "Shutus Trapus" (to silence a person), "Vanisimo" (to make someone or something vanish), and "Gigglitis" (uncontrollable laughter) to command my powers.

I bet I could make some serious change busking as a street corner magician. I'll wear a top hat and cape to give me that old-time magician look. "Hocus pocus, alacazam - turn this girl into a man!" And poof, this cute little 9-year-old eating frozen yogurt, with a flash of light and a billow of smoke, instantly becomes a full-grown bearded man wearing tight jean shorts and a t-shirt that says, 'BEAR' on it. The best part was when she hugged her dad out of fear of the light and smoke part of the show, and they both realized that she was now a big ol' he. Of course, I turned her back to her original self when I distracted the crowd with an impromptu light-show across the street.

Seeing the looks of surprise and amazement on people's faces, and the smiles and laughter is the real reason I do this kind of stuff (but the pay ain't so bad either).

Entry 57 57 Varieties of Pickles" by the H.J. Heinz Company. That’s the first thing I thought of when I realized that I was about to start Entry 57. Heinz Tomato Ketchup was my absolute favorite condiment to smother all over my french fries, onion rings and scrambled eggs.

Since California is my home turf, I healed the San Andrea's Fault. Sort of like fixing two pieces a giant ball from pulling apart by using Super Glue. No more shakers, rattlers, or fear of California falling into the ocean. No 'Big One,' just peace of mind. I don't think anyone will notice, except for the geology geeks at Cal Tech.

Entry 58 I’ve developed my own style of stove-top cooking that creates food that is to-die-for. I take a skillet with a high edge (approx. 2”) and let it pre-heat for a minute or so, then I add one drop of cannabis-infused oil to the center of the pan. As flames rise around the edge of the skillet, I place my food; vegetables, chicken, or fish, in the dead center. The flames then envelope the tasty morsels and cook them to the point where the inside is cooked perfectly and the outside is charred deliciously for the best look and feel. I call this method Satan Flambé.

Entry 59 Whenever I’ve asked a believer in God where Heaven was, they would inevitably point to the sky. Okay, I get it, Heaven is up and Hell is down, but what I want to know is why does Heaven always looks like it’s just above a bunch of fluffy white clouds, seen from the window of a plane, in our atmosphere? Believers will argue that it is beyond space, but again I ask, why does it look that way? And how the Hell do they know? The bible was written by men Centuries ago, long before air travel, they would have no way of knowing what it looked like beyond the clouds. While I’m at it, which one of those lily-white-ass holy men knew exactly what a sinner would expect when they arrived in Hell? I think some scholars with some hallucinogenic plants and a great imagination had a field day composing the greatest piece of fiction man has ever created.

Entry 60 I often hear overly empathetic believers say, “Thereby the grace of God go I” when they see someone who appears less fortunate than themselves. I figured if they can use God as their fictional character of caring, I can use any other fictional character that I choose; “Thereby the grace of Ironman go I,” “Thereby the grace of Captain Kirk go I,” and my favorite, “Thereby the grace of Satan go I.”Try it sometime, it’s fun!

Entry 61 Mankind is a tough nut to crack. From the beginning of the human race, from small tribal villages to modern urban cities, man has been in love with power. Power over another person or people, power over the environment, power over the weather. To control others and profit from this behavior has become the Universal Dream. The negative side of greed - void of morals and value for life. This is the side of greed that sees other human beings as merely a commodity, a vehicle to exploit and discard. The positive side of greed is the motivation to do more and to want better for yourself and others.

I find that individually people are incredible, more than a couple and you start to get that group mentality. Groups can be dangerous because 1) they’re larger and more powerful, and 2) they can be more easily led to believe untruths. Groups become a generality, a race or culture of people, whereas one or two people are simply that, people. Fellow human beings with histories, families, stories, triumphs, and failures.

There is an insane amount of division between folks these days. Party lines in governments, religions, economic class, ethnicity, age, sports - it always comes down to us against them. We have been divided up and fattened for slaughter. My big quandary is how in tarnation am I going to do enough good in the World to make a difference? I already knew the answer to my own question - the only one judging me on whether or not I’m doing enough good in the World is me.

“What, me worry?” - Alfred E. Newman

Entry 62 The people that totally crack me up, but are extremely dangerous to society and the environment are those that claim to be the reincarnation of Jesus Christ. From Kondratiy Selivanov and Ann Lee in the 18th Century to the nutcases Oscar Ramiro Ortega-Hernandez and Alan John Miller of today, these extremists actually think that they are the embodiment of Jesus Christ. According to Wikipedia, there are 30 of these folks from the 20th and 21st Centuries alone. This is cosplay on a whole different level. I mean yeah, you'll find guys dressed as Jesus at Comic-Con, usually riding a T-Rex and sporting an automatic weapon, but they know that they are just playing around. To spout gospel, start your own cult, and take innocent people's money, and sometimes their lives are downright criminally insane.

Here are a few quotes from Alan John (AJ) Miller, head of the Divine Truth cult in Australia, "There's probably a million people who say they're Jesus and most of them are in asylums. But one of us has to be. How do I know I am? Because I remember everything about my life."

"Just a little over 2000 years ago, we arrived on the Earth for the first time."

"My name is Jesus and I'm serious."

This guy is a classic cult leader who has done his homework. He has plucked peoples heartstrings by calling himself Jesus. He uses the 5 common methods of mind control;  1. People are put in physical or emotionally distressing situations, 2. Their problems are reduced to one simple explanation, which is repeatedly emphasized, 3. They receive unconditional love, acceptance, and attention from a charismatic leader or group, 4. They get a new identity based on the group, 5.  They are subject to entrapment (isolation from friends, relatives and the mainstream culture) and their access to information is severely controlled. Miller has mixed in scientific proof with biblical bullshit and called it Gods Truth. It sounds convincing, but come on, humans have only been around for 2000 years?!? (It's actually closer to 200,000)

*note to self: never be like that.

Entry 63 After a little research, I found out that only a handful of families own and operate the World Banks and are heavily invested in all of the Fortune 500 companies. Ah ha, so I’m not a conspiracy nut! This mafia of money has almost every major country in their very deep pockets. These money magnets figured out what makes the most money - destruction. If they create, allow, and promote any kind of disaster that will need fixing, they finance it and get fiscally fatter. War is easy, push some false propaganda about a country who doesn’t want to sell their resources to these world banks, send in a bully such as the United States to create a coup, and finance both sides of the war and the rebuilding of the country. The devastation of natural disasters is a major cash cow. Mankind has been messing around with controlling the weather [scientifically] since the 1940s. Cloud seeding is real. The larger and more powerful the storm, the more flooding and devastation, the sweeter the payout is for these robber barons. The mainstream media are puppets that they control to promote the fear-mongering and hatred that keeps people divided and fighting. To them, human beings are merely collateral cattle to do their bidding, over-populate, and die off in the slaughter.

And they say Satan is the evil one! If greed is one of the Seven Deadly Sins, these Bastards should be very dead (oh that’s right, the bible is just a book of fiction). I love to mess with their capitalistic system by hitting them where it hurts, in their wallets. I like to create boycotts of companies and products that are morally guilty and have safety issues and hazardous ingredients. Now you know why Walmart and Amazon stocks keep dropping like a lead balloon (Sorry guys, should be treating your employees better and paying them a decent wage to live on).

Entry 64 “Will you still need me, will you still feed me, when I’m 64.” - The Beatles

Today I was challenged by some dimwit visitor at work. He thought he was being funny by wearing his admission sticker somewhere hidden. When I asked him if he had his admission sticker he quite confidently exclaimed, “Yes!” When I asked to see the sticker he declared, “Don’t worry, I AM wearing it.” At this point, I was ready to have some fun. I very politely said, “Game on. Let’s play. If you truly are wearing that sticker, it will begin to burn through your clothing and brandish itself onto your skin. If nothing burns, you don’t have a sticker and need to go buy one, AND one for another person waiting in line. The fire has been lit, and the burning will commence in 5, 4, 3, 2,1…

It was like watching a live action cartoon, his face went from a smartass cocky grin straight to a look of horror and confusion. I found out real quickly where he stuck that sticker. After letting him jump around smacking his own ass like he was riding in a rodeo, I stopped the burning. As a parting gift, I left the sticker inked onto his skin as a permanent reminder of our time together. What can I say, I’m a giver.

Entry 65 I love the names of some of the fundraisers that Satanic groups come up with; SOLES FOR SATAN, MASTERBATIN’ FOR SATAN, MENSTRATIN’ FOR SATAN, SATANIC BLACK MASS, SATANIC STORY TIME, EXERCISING DEMONS, SPEAK OF THE DEVIL. I think there should be something for senior citizen Satanists - CONSTIPATED FOR SATAN, GRAMP’N FOR SATAN, or for the Jewish Satanists - SHALOMING FOR SATAN. HEIL SATAN for those dedicated German Satanists, and for the White Supremacist Satanists(?) I’LL KILL MYSELF FOR SATAN.

Entry 66{6} Via one of my favorite information source, Wikipedia, some Number of the Beast history and trivia:

In Kabbalistic Judaism the number 666 does not play any significant role as such. However, the perfect number 6 and some of its multiples (e.g. 36, 72 and 216) represents the creation and perfection of the world. The world was created in 6 days, and there are 6 cardinal directions (North, South, East, West, Up, Down). 6 is also the numerical value of one of the letters of God's name, associated with the Sefirah of Tiferet, which represents harmony, beauty, and cosmic balance. Rabbi Eliezer Horovitz, quoting the Vilna Gaon, mentions in his book Mosad ha-Yesod that the number 666 contains hidden within it exalted and lofty messianic potential, but does not explain any details of this conjecture.

Jehovah's Witnesses believe that the beast identified by the number 666 represents the world's unified governments in opposition to God. The beast is said to have "a human number" in that the represented governments are of a human origin rather than spirit entities. The number 666 is said to identify "gross shortcoming and failure in the eyes of Jehovah," in contrast to the number 7, which is seen as symbolizing perfection.

Seventh-day Adventists taking this view believe that the Mark of the Beast (but not the number 666) refers to a future, universal, legally enforced Sunday-sacredness. "Those who reject God's memorial of creator-ship—the Bible Sabbath—choosing to worship and honor Sunday in the full knowledge that it is not God's appointed day of worship, will receive the 'mark of the beast.’"

"The Sunday Sabbath is purely a child of the Papacy. It is the mark of the beast.”

Idealism, also known as the allegorical or symbolic approach, is an interpretation of the book of Revelation that sees the imagery of the book as non-literal symbols. The idealist perspective on the number of the beast rejects gematria, envisioning the number not as a code to be broken, but a symbol to be understood. Idealists would contend that because there are so many names that can come to 666 and that most systems require converting names to other languages or adding titles when convenient, it has been impossible to come to a consensus. Given that numbers are used figuratively throughout the book of Revelation, idealists interpret this number figuratively as well. The common suggestion is that because seven represents completeness and is associated with the divine, that six is incomplete and the three sixes are "inherently incomplete". The number is therefore suggestive that the Dragon and his beasts are completely inadequate. Another suggestion is that this number represents an individual's incomplete or immature spiritual state.

In 1989, Nancy and Ronald Reagan, when moving to their home in the Bel-Air section of Los Angeles after the 1988 election, had its address—666 St. Cloud Road—changed to 668 St. Cloud Road. In 2003, U.S. Route 666 in New Mexico was changed to U.S. Route 491. A New Mexico spokesperson stated, "The devil's out of here, and we say goodbye and good riddance."The phobia has been a motif in various horror films such as The Omen and its 2006 remake. The number of the beast also appears in other films such as Pulp Fiction, The Doom Generation, End of Days, Bedazzled, and The Phantom of the Opera. Some women expressed concern about giving birth on June 6, 2006 (6/6/06).

I know that I should have waited until Entry 666 to lay all this Number of the Beast stuff on you, but I just couldn’t wait to share.

Entry 67 I have actually come to appreciate the creators of government, religion, and commerce. Their patience in their long-term goals of corruption and greed is unsurpassed. They knew even then, that control of the minds, hearts, and money of the masses would ensure them wealth and power. The Catholic Church has been molesting children for centuries, and followers to this day still believe that the Church is here to do good in the World. According to TIME magazine, the Catholic Church is worth somewhere between 10 and 15 billion dollars, and they don’t pay taxes on any of it! The naivety of a huge portion of the populous, for this long, is almost unfathomable. Countries have been spying on each other, keeping secrets, and starting wars not for the reasons the mainstream media tell us, but for private profit. And of course, major corporations know that enough money spent on lobbying and bribes buys you control of both governments and religion. The 'War on Drugs' is funded by the U.S. government. The U.S. military protects the poppy fields in Afghanistan, then supplies the drugs made from the poppy, and then uses the drugs as an excuse for police brutality and more drug-related arrests. Privately run prisons make a killing off of the minor drug convictions. None of this is new, they just keep getting better at pulling the wool over the sheeple's eyes. I guess you could say I am the fly in the ointment, the wrench in the system, the thorn in their side. I’m like the older brother sticking his finger an inch from his little brothers face while repeating, “I’m not touching you, I’m not touching you, I’m not touching you…”

Entry 68 It's officially Fall here in Southern California, which basically means it still feels like Summer. Daytime temps are in the 80's and 90's and humid in the evenings. It can be difficult to get into the Halloween spirit when the smell of suntan lotion fills the air and people are walking around in shorts and t-shirts. Here is Satan wishing for cooler weather <insert irony here>. I'm starting to think about what I want to be for All Hallows Eve. Since October 31 in Beth and my wedding anniversary, that night holds a special place in our hearts. Every year we do something fun and darkly-themed to celebrate our nuptials such as visit the Winchester Mystery House, take a trip to New Orleans or even go camping at a ghost town. But this year will be the first time I honor my love as Satan.

Entry 69 The yin and yang, the sex position, 96 to a dyslexic. The key is finding a balance. I'm finding out that I can't, and probably shouldn't try to save the world. A very wise supervisor once said to me, "Sometimes you've got to let it fail." This is a good reminder also to not draw too much attention to myself Satanic self. It's so easy to want to right every wrong, make every criminal pay for their crimes and be the hero, but I've got to remember - Satanic Lowriding (Satanic lowriding sounds like I'm riding around in a murdered out black Chevy Impala with red leather interior and hydraulics).

Entry 70 I have a confession, I like watching videos of people having huge pimples popped and blackheads squeezed. It's like a car crash, you don't want to look but you can't help it. Seeing the pus pulp of dead white blood cells and fresh red blood being pushed forth from the skin of their host makes me feel like I have the cleanest skin EVER! There is a woman on Facebook who goes by the name of Doctor POP that is a true artist at dermal cleansing. It's so beautifully sterile the way the patients are covered in surgical protectants leaving only the infected area exposed for Doctor POP to lacerate and squeeze like she's popping a champagne bottle with her latex covered fingers, true anatomic artistry.

Entry 71 Beth and I are not planning on having kids, but if we did, I'd like to use the names of the Devil to identify our little bundles of joy and also piss off the religious right. I just read an article about seven boys named Lucifer in England and Wales, how fun is that! Those towns are going think that it's an evil uprising coming to take over the World! I can just see our boy Lucifer burning up the streets on his skateboard, Satanas attending her first prom, and baby Beelzebub bouncin' 'round the room. My minion of misfit minors. I would teach our kids to be confident but not aggressive (unless it is necessary), to be proud of their names, and always keep their sense of humor. What will baby Bee's first word be, flies?

Entry 72 Last night I worked [security] for a wedding at the Garden. The usual big fancy set up with lots of staging, flowers, and rich people dressed to the 9's. The event was fine, until about 10:30 when a few of the neighbors in this wealthy suburb complained about the volume of the music coming from the dance floor. It was a beautiful celebration and everything was running smoothly until that visit by the police to turn things down, which did put a bit of a damper on the bride and grooms special day. As an anonymous wedding gift, I placed an invisible sound barrier around the property and told informed the DJ to turn it up. I asked my supervisor to step outside the gate of the garden near where the reception was being held to check the decibel reading. When she confirmed that it was quiet as a mouse across the street, we let the party rage on. The list of songs Mr. DJ was spinning from his laptop computer was an awesome mix of classic wedding tunes such as, "We Are Family" and "The Time of My Life, " to modern hip-hop. Mazel Tov you two crazy kids.

Entry 73 October 1st. Despite the fact that it is 95 degrees and sunny hasn't put a damper on my Halloween enthusiasm, as a matter of fact, it only motivates me more to find creative ways to celebrate All Hallows Eve. Since we are in Southern California and don't get the cool Fall weather with trees changing to a lovely Autumn orange and yellow, my image of this spooky time of year is that of an old western ghost town - dusty streets with tumbleweed blowing by, an old cemetery with wooden grave markers, and skeletons wearing cowboy hats and boots. Even though our apartment looks like we decorate for Halloween all year round, things get even more creepy during the last few months of the year. The 'Holiday Season' is a hauntingly beautiful time. Our neighbors have agreed to let me decorate the whole building, which means there will be a lot of traffic on our street due cars slowing down in amazement of our ghoulish display while expelling shrieks, ooo’s and ahhh’s. Time to start designing…

Entry 74 I had fun today at work doing nice, little, anonymous things for people. When I saw a co-worker with a handful of stuff approaching the reception door, I’d make the door gently swing open just as they arrived at the threshold. People would suddenly get great cell phone reception. Flowers would slowly fade from their original color to another hue, and then back. I even put a smile on a woman’s scowling face. Seeing the look of confusion convert to a pleasant surprise in her eyes was priceless.

Entry 75 Faux 'Service Dogs' used to really bother me when their obnoxious owners would get defensive when I would stop them to ask the two questions that, by law, I am allowed to ask, 1. Is it a Service Dog, and 2. What specific task is the dog trained to provide for their disability? The lying dog owner would always get agitated and blurt out something like, “Medical reasons” or “According to the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act) you can’t ask me that” which just proves their dishonesty and arrogance. Now, I simply ask the dogs.

Today a couple tried to get in with not one, but two dogs. The white Maltese pups were on extending leashes held by the tattooed-shaved head-muscle shirt-douche with an attitude. When I asked him the questions he gave me the standard answers, they were service dogs and that I was not allowed to ask him the second question. I immediately looked down at the canines and asked them, “Are YOU Service Dogs?” to which they replied by telling me, “Service? We just want to run around, pee and poop!” They then both peed on their lying owners' legs and turn around to run back the other way. I politely look at him and said, “Service dogs huh? Get out and stop abusing a law that is for protecting the rights of disabled people whom legitimately need a dog to assist them through life.” He shot me a look of pure hatred that I found extremely humorous as they turned and stomped away, all the while his girlfriend never said a word, only rolling her eyes in embarrassment.

Entry 76 Typical of the church, they find something that people celebrate and enjoy and steal it for their own propaganda. I love a good haunted house, the more realistic the better. Hell Houses are the Christian haunted houses that show vignettes of the horrors of sinning - Anti-abortion, anti-drug, anti-free thinking, etc… The earliest hell house appears to have been created by Rev. Jerry Falwell in the late 1970s. The concept was picked up in 1992 by Keenan Roberts. His first Hell House was in Roswell, NM. Since then, he has become a pastor of the Destiny Church in Arvada, CO and sells Hell House Outreach™ kits to other churches. Included is a 263-page manual which covers everything from casting to publicity to instructions on how to make hamburger meat look like a fetus and where to store vats of blood. Roberts was once quoted saying that Hell Houses, "show young people that they can go to hell for abortion, adultery, homosexuality, drinking and other things unless they repent and end the behavior.” Can you believe this shit?!? Taking something fun like being frightened by gore and things-that-go-bump-in-the-night (which are healthy things to be afraid of), and scarring kids for life with these barbaric recruitment tactics.

There is a Hell House in West Hollywood, CA. I thought to myself, “How much fun would it be to visit their little moral macabre show and scare the Hell out of THEM?!?” So I did. It wasn’t very crowded, mostly parishioners of that church and their delusional families. I acted humble and quiet, waiting to see the horrors of modern life they were about to show me. In all of the rooms I went into, I changed the attitude of the actors to the enjoyment of the sin they were demonstratively demonstrating as opposed to the negative scare tactics of which they intended to portray. I had couples thanking God for the ability to get an abortion because of rape, men and women/men and men/women and women passionately making love, and one scene where a family was sitting around the kitchen table smoking pot and drinking wine and beer. For fear that anyone would see this gross display of carnal pleasure, this Hell House closed almost immediately after I left the premises.

Entry 77 So the story goes that back in the heyday of Rock and Roll on the Sunset Strip in Hollywood there was a drinking club made up of musicians known as the Hollywood Vampires who hung out at the famous Rainbow Bar on Sunset Blvd. next door to the Roxy club. They acquired the name Hollywood Vampires because they were only seen at night and quite often were drinking red wine. Fast forward to 2015. Three friends - Alice Cooper, Joe Perry of Aerosmith, and actor/musician Johnny Depp get together and decide to form a band to honor their dead drunk friends from rock and roll's past, and aptly name the band the Hollywood Vampires. Along with some of the best session players in the biz, the Vampires totally shred on songs by their friends from bands such as The Who, Led Zeppelin, T-Rex, and many others. I have been listening to their debut album non-stop for a couple of weeks! Alice Cooper being the rock and roll patriarch of the group owns the stage with his commanding prowess, while Joe, Johnny and the rest of the band rock the hell out of the songs of their fallen compadres. Never stop rockin’!  

Entry 78 I’m sort of happy that the folklore character Krampus is becoming more popular, at the same time I’d hate to see such kind-hearted ally become the victim of over-marketing. Krampus, in European folklore, looks like a fur-covered half goat/half demon. He plays the bad-cop to Saint Nicholas’ good-cop. While ol’ St. Nick rewarded the good children with toys, Krampus punished the bad kids by beating them with a birch switch, gathering them up in his wicker basket he wears on his back and tosses them into a special place in Hell. I’m tired of seeing all the faux goodwill towards man bullshit around Christmas time, and then it’s back to displaying our prejudices and hate to each other.

Entry 79 Not surprising, I support the supposed ‘War on Christmas.’ Of course, there is no War on Christmas, it’s just the extreme right-wing Christians that feel threatened because there are other people who celebrate the Winter Solstice differently than they do. Everything has to be “Merry Christmas” instead of “Happy Holidays.” They get their Jesus loving panties in a bunch when Starbucks’ holiday cups don’t look Christmasy enough. They actually think that December 25th is the birthday of their fictional savior. Oy Vey.

Christmas lights on churches can’t seem to stay lit for some reason <wink wink>. People who display giant crosses as part of their Christmas decorations tend to find them inverted each night when they turn on their retina-burning light displays. Hypocrites who complain about Starbuck’s cups but continue to buy their coffee find that holding that not-Christmas-enough cup is impossible because it is hot as Hell in their sacred hands (making McDonald’s coffee seem like an ice bath).

Every time a choir sings, a demon gets their wings.

Entry 80 I think I’m going to take it easy for the rest of the year and wait for the overly sponsored Tournament of Roses Parade on New Years Day. Maybe I’ll hex the floats so that none of them stall or breakdown on the parade route. Happy New Year!©

[tsarisfanfiction]

Fic Recs: Scott!Whump

So I’ve been asked for Scott!whump fic recs a couple of times now, so figured I might as well throw my favourites out here to share with anyone interested.

Some of these aren’t solely Scott whump, but they’re all Scott getting hurt or into some sort of trouble or angsty, and they’re all fics I highly enjoyed reading!  Mix of FFN and AO3 in here.

I’m terrible at remembering names (author or fic), and almost as bad at bookmarking/favouriting them.  I know there are fics I can vaguely recall as being amazing that I just can’t find, and if/when I do, I’ll add them to the list. Update 17/7/20: someone threw one of these ‘I remember it but I couldn’t find it’ fics in the notes so that’s in here now.

I only recommend complete fics, because abandoned fics are my personal bane and the only way to guarantee avoiding them is to stick to completed fics!  That’s not to say I don’t read ongoing works, but unless it’s absolutely out of this world amazing, you won’t find me recommending any.  Just in case.

Δv/Δt by Heavenward Deceleration is a function of velocity over time. Rating: Gen.  Family.  Scott, John, EOS Chapters: 1; Words: 4k.  Complete

A Father by rosefields Scott Tracy has been under a lot of pressure since his mother died. But he can cope, it's not a problem. Jeff know that, his oldest is strong and capable and he doesn't need his father. Right? Rating: K.  Family/Hurt/Comfort.  Scott, Jeff Chapters: 1; Words: 3k.  Complete

All Alone by Loopstagirl Scott reaches breaking point for looking after his brothers so Grandma Tracy takes charge of the situation, and her son. Rating: K.  Family/Hurt/Comfort.  Scott, Grandma Chapters: 1; Words: 5k.  Complete

Back Story by Phoenix_Sparrow That rock slide while rescuing Kat Kavanaugh has left Scott with more than just a few bruises. Rating: Gen.  Family/Hurt/Comfort.  Scott, Virgil, Gordon Chapters: 1; Words: 6k.  Complete

Dare To Hope by i_amnerd Not for the first time, Scott wishes that little brothers came with some kind of training manual or instruction booklet. Rating: Gen.  Family/Hurt/Comfort.  Scott, John Chapters: 1; Words: 1k.  Complete

Exhaustion by Just Another Flygirl A rescue mission in space is interrupted with deadly consequences... Rating: K+.  Suspense/Angst.  Scott, Alan, John Chapters: 7; Words: 9k.  Complete

Facts of Life by Kaeera There are some situations – lying on a floor in a pool of your own blood, for example – that really put things into perspective. Rating: T.  Drama.  Scott, Tracy Family Chapters: 1; Words: 5k.  Complete

Grudgingly Human by Yarnaholic Scott faces some old demons while trying to talk down a man standing on a building ledge after a rescue. Rating: Mature.  Angst.  Scott, Virgil, John Chapters: 1; Words: 4k.  Complete

Illusion of a Saint by Alternate Reality1 There's an enemy admist their ranks. He's hidden in plain sight. The question is... when will the illusion be shattered? Rated: T.  Spiritual/Suspense.  Scott, Hood, Tracy Family Chapters: 18; Words: 92k.  Complete

In Enemy Hands by Claudette When the secrets of International Rescue are offered for sale to the highest bidder the Tracy family must act quickly. However, their secrets are not the only thing that is at stake. Rated: K.  Adventure/Drama.  Scott, John, Tracy Family Chapters: 18; Words: 62k.  Complete

Labyrinth by TB’s LMC One minute Scott Tracy's at Mobile Control directing a rescue. The next, he's in a fight for his life. Rated: M.  Horror/Supernatural.  Scott, Tracy Family Chapters: 8; Words: 12k.  Complete

Missing Scene: The Uninvited by Juud18 In between Scott being found by Lindsey and Wilson, and the scene where Scott, TinTin, Virgil, Brains, and Wilson and Lindsey are sitting at the campfire. Rated: K+.  Family.  Scott Chapters: 1; Words: 2k.  Complete

Mission Impossible by Loopstagirl Being selected for his first solo mission should have been exciting for Captain Scott Tracy of the Air Force. But there was something else at play. Something dangerous and deadly. Something that could cost him more than his life. Rated: T.  Family/Adventure.  Scott, Gordon Chapters: 12; Words: 55k.  Complete

Never Too Late by Loopstagirl As the family deal with grief, Scott must face his fears and grow up, whilst Jeff battles between being dad and being a successful businessman. But what will it take to bring the two of them back together again? Rated: T.  Hurt/Comfort/Family.  Scott, Jeff Chapters: 22; Words: 58k.  Complete

Over and Out by Pheonix_Sparrow An incident at an earthquake rescue leaves Scott frustrated when he's injured. Rated: Gen.  Hurt/Comfort/Family.  Scott, Virgil. Chapters: 1; Words: 5k.  Complete

Rescue by taralynden On the way home from a rescue, Thunderbird One crashes and it’s up to Scott’s family to save him. Rated: Gen.  Hurt/Comfort/Drama.  Scott, Tracy Family Chapters: 10; Words: 26k.  Complete

Scott Series: Fallen Brother by QuestRunner In a rare chance to bond with his youngest brother, Scott takes Alan with him on a simple mission to repair a damaged satellite. With tempers running high, the boys find themselves arguing over the roles they play in International Rescue. When Alan slips off a cliff, it's up to Scott to save his brother and mend their broken relationship. Rated: T.  Family/Hurt/Comfort.  Scott, Alan Chapters: 7; Words: 11k.  Complete

Shiver by Loopstagirl When one of the Thunderbirds is infecting with something deadly, will the rest of the Tracys be able to save one of their own? Or are they about to be torn apart by grief again? Rated: T.  Hurt/Comfort/Family.  Scott, John, Tracy Family Chapters: 17; Words: 44k.  Complete

The Assignment by Kaeera Twelve year old Scott struggles with a writing assignment. Honestly, when you have four younger brothers, it can be hard finding time for yourself. Rated: K+.  Humour/Drama.  Scott, Jeff, Tracy Family Chapters: 1; Words: 10k.  Complete

The Hardest Thing by eriphi How do you manage a billion dollar business and parent four growing boys at the same time? It takes something serious to make Jeff realise that he isn't managing as well as he thought. Rated: K+.  Family.  Scott, Virgil, John, Jeff Chapters: 2; Words: 5k.  Complete

The Silent Conversation by mjc The sound of sirens, a flash of light and waking up under a pile of rubble. How can Scott survive knowing help just might not come? Rated: T.  Hurt/Comfort.  Scott, Jeff Chapters: 1; Words: 5k.  Complete

Tomorrow Never Knows by Silverstar Things had not gone according to plan, to say the least. Now they were trapped on a deserted island in the middle of nowhere with no hope of rescue and increasingly slim chances of survival. To make matters worse, the Chaos Crew had shown up. This was not going to be a fun week. Rated: T.  Hurt/Comfort/Angst.  Scott, Gordon, Alan Chapters: 15; Words: 110k.  Complete

Weathering the Storm by tiylaya When an unexpected storm shipwrecks a holidaying Jeff Tracy and three of his young sons, they're thrown into a situation far more dangerous and complex than anyone initially realises. Rated: T.  Adventure/Angst.  Scott, Gordon, Jeff Chapters: 22; Words: 102k.  Complete

#fanfiction rec list #scott tracy #thunderbirds are go #thunderbirds #not my fic #fanfiction

[yhwhrulz]

Today's Daily Encounter

God’s Word is Forever

“The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever.”1

Most people enjoy having live plants and flowers in and around their home. Most enjoy the sight of a beautiful landscape filled with trees and green grass. There are those blessed with the gift to grow and maintain beautiful green plants and flowers, and then there are those who, although they enjoy plants, cannot keep one alive long enough to enjoy it! I, myself, am one of the latter. There is one plant in my home, and I truly believe that it has simply resigned itself to living under my very black thumb! I love having plants and fresh flowers in my home, but for some reason they never seem to thrive under my care. Recently, I was searching the internet for tips on proper plant care, when I came across an advertisement for an application that you can download onto your smartphone which allows you to take a picture of your plant and the application can identify the type of plant you have and the care it needs. Whether it be water, sunlight, or vitamins that my plant needs, technology can now aid me in growing healthy plants!

Plants, however, are living creations and as such will eventually wither and fade. No amount of technology can stop that. Even the technology itself will change, but the Bible assures us that one thing will never wither and fade; one thing will stand forever and that is the Word of our God. Just like an app can tell me how to care for my plant, God’s Word can instruct me on how to nurture my spiritual health and thrive under the care of my loving Creator. By spending time in God’s Word, I can soak up His love and therefore reflect His beauty through my words and deeds. The Word of God was left to us as a sort of instruction manual and when we are feeling dry and withered, we can open the Bible and water our thirsty soul with the blessings and promises found within the pages of God’s Word. When we are feeling wilted, we can lift our voice to the Son in prayer and allow His light to shine upon us. As a part of God’s beautiful Creation, we, too, need to be nurtured and pruned. Allow the Creator to clip and water as He sees fit, so that we might grow into spiritually healthy beings, pruned for the Kingdom of God.

Suggested Prayer:

Dear God, our Almighty Creator, nurture my soul and fill me with your love so that I might thrive when I read your Word and shine when I spend time in prayer with you. Let others see your handiwork in me. Allow me to reflect your glory and beauty to all I meet. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

1. Isaiah 40:8.

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"Daily Encounter by Richard (Dick) Innes (c) 2016

ACTS International

[piouscatholic]

#StJosephNovena

#DaySeven:

Patron of Workers

Saint Joseph, you devoted your time at Nazareth to the work of a carpenter.

It was the Will of God that you and your foster-Son should spend your days together in manual labor.

What a beautiful example you set for the working classes!

It was especially for the poor, who compose the greater part of mankind, that Jesus came upon earth, for in the synagogue of Nazareth, He read the words of Isaiah and referred them to Himself:

'The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because He has anointed Me to bring good news to the poor...'

(Luke 4:18).

It was God's Will that you should be occupied with work common to poor people, that in this way Jesus Himself might ennoble it by inheriting it from you, His foster-father, and by freely embracing it.

Thus our Lord teaches us that for the humbler class of workmen, He has in store His richest graces, provided they live content in the place God's Providence has assigned them, and remain poor in spirit for He said,

'Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven'

(Matt. 5:3).

The kind of work to which you devoted your time in the workshop of Nazareth offered you many occasions of practicing humility.

You were privileged to see each day the example of humility which Jesus practiced -- a virtue most pleasing to Him.

He chose for His earthly surroundings not the courts of princes nor the halls of the learned, but a little workshop of Nazareth. Here you shared for many years the humble and hidden toiling of the God-Man.

What a touching example for the worker of today!

While your hands were occupied with manual work, your mind was turned to God in prayer.

From the Divine Master, who worked along with you, you learned to work in the presence of God in the spirit of prayer, for as He worked He adored His Father and recommended the welfare of the world to Him, Jesus also instructed you in the wonderful truths of grace and virtue, for you were in close contact with Him who said of Himself, 'I am the Way and the Truth and the Life.'

As you were working at your trade, you were reminded of the greatness and majesty of God, who, as a most wise Architect, formed this vast universe with wonderful skill and limitless power.

The light of divine faith that filled your mind, did not grow dim when you saw Jesus working as a carpenter.

You firmly believed that the saintly Youth working beside you was truly God's own Son.

Saint Joseph, I thank God for your privilege of being able to work side by side with Jesus in the carpenter shop of Nazareth.

As a token of your own gratitude to God, obtain for me the grace to respect the dignity of labor and ever to be content with the position in life, however lowly, in which it may please Divine Providence to place me.

Teach me to work for God and with God in the spirit of humility and prayer, as you did, so that I may offer my toil in union with the sacrifice of Jesus in the Mass as a reparation for my sins, and gain rich merit for heaven.

Saint Joseph, I, your unworthy child, greet you. You are the faithful protector and intercessor of all who love and venerate you.

You know that I have special confidence in you and that, after Jesus and Mary, I place all my hope of salvation in you, for you are especially powerful with God and will never abandon your faithful servants.

Therefore I humbly invoke you and commend myself, with all who are dear to me and all that belong to me, to your intercession.

I beg of you, by your love for Jesus and Mary, not to abandon me during life and to assist me at the hour of my death.

Glorious Saint Joseph, spouse of the Immaculate Virgin, obtain for me a pure, humble, charitable mind, and perfect resignation to the divine Will.

Be my guide, my father, and my model through life that I may merit to die as you did in the arms of Jesus and Mary.

Loving Saint Joseph, faithful follower of Jesus Christ, I raise my heart to you to implore your powerful intercession in obtaining from the Divine Heart of Jesus all the graces necessary for my spiritual and temporal welfare, particularly the grace of a happy death, and the special grace I now implore:

(Mention your request).

Guardian of the Word Incarnate, I feel confident that your prayers in my behalf will be graciously heard before the throne of God. Amen.

#MEMORARE

Remember, most pure spouse of Mary, ever Virgin, my loving protector, Saint Joseph, that no one ever had recourse to your protection or asked for your aid without obtaining relief.

Confiding, therefore, in your goodness, I come before you and humbly implore you.

Despise not my petitions, foster-father of the Redeemer, but graciously receive them. Amen.

#EWTNCom

[sixthsensepower]

Spiritual Healing - Testing the Healing Techniques - Do They Really Work?

Over the years that I have studied and practiced spiritual healing, I have seen and experienced many healings and health improvements along the way which I attribute to spiritual healing. I reached this conclusion very scientifically over a growing period of time by testing the healing techniques to determine if they really work.

How it all started - Healing #1

I had read several times that spiritual healing brings healing and relief from pain and suffering, but I never thought of using spiritual healing until one day when I injured my hand. I felt this might be a good time to give it a try to see if it would help my hand to heal. I had a large, deep wound in my hand that normally would take several weeks to heal. I felt this would be a good test to see how fast the wound would heal if I used spiritual healing.

I also decided that the best way to keep track of my spiritual healing efforts and results would be to create a journal, logging in what my spiritual healing work consisted of, how often I did it, and what I did. I would also keep track of my healing progress (or lack of progress). I felt the journaling was important because it would give me an objective, unbiased, concrete accounting of events which I could refer to at will. This accounting could help me objectively decide if spiritual healing did or did not help to bring healing. I felt trying to commit my results to memory would be unreliable since most of us tend to feel differently about things on different days, depending on circumstances and events.

I sat down to begin spiritual healing work to heal my hand. I wasn't sure I was doing it right, but I followed the instructions the best that I could. I intently gazed at my hand as I did the spiritual work, hoping to see some sort of magical healing take place, and hoped that I would actually see the wound heal and disappear from my hand.

After fifteen minutes of doing spiritual healing work, much to my disappointment, I did not see nor feel any change in my hand. The wound was still there and it still hurt.

Since I was working to heal a wound rather than an illness, I read that I should do the spiritual work frequently - several times a day, as often as possible. Each time I did my spiritual work on the first day, I was expecting some type of miraculous healing, but that didn't happen. When I went to bed that night, I still couldn't see any change in the appearance of the wound, and I still had considerable pain. I fell asleep that night doing spiritual work to heal my hand.

Much to my surprise, the following morning, when I looked at the wound, it was much smaller. There was less swelling, the skin was normal around the wound instead of being red, the scabby area itself looked smaller, and the pain was gone.

As the day progressed, I continued with the spiritual work and was amazed to note that the wound was rapidly getting smaller.

On the second night of my experiment, I again fell asleep doing spiritual work for the complete healing of my hand and when I woke up, there was only a slightly perceptible wound area. In amazement I looked at my hand wondering how this could be possible for a large wound to heal so fast, and leave no visible scar. I logged all of this information into my journal and I concluded that the spiritual healing technique I used did in fact heal my hand and that my first experiment ended in success because I realized complete healing of the wound I was trying to heal in a record period of time.

But - was the healing a coincidence?

Just as I was basking in achievement, I began to wonder if the healing I realized might have been coincidental to the spiritual healing work. Would it have healed anyway since I did wash the wound, treated it with an over-the-counter antibacterial medication, and kept it bandaged most of the time to keep the wound clean?

Now I was faced with the question of whether or not my hand would have healed without the spiritual healing work. What if the spiritual healing work I did really had no affect at all in my healing? I decided the only way to be sure was to run another test. Since I didn't have any other healing need at the time I decided to try a spiritual healing technique on my dog.

Testing the technique again - Healing #2

My dog injured one of her hind legs. The veterinarian told me that my dog would never be able to walk again on that leg due to the nature of the injury. The vet said that the muscles in my dog's leg would atrophy (shrink in size) over time, and my dog would spend the rest of her life limping on three legs.

Not wanting to believe this, I sought consultation from three other veterinarians and each told me the same thing - neither surgery nor medications could or would restore my dog's leg to normalcy.

This saddened me greatly to think my dog would be crippled for the rest of her life, and it grieved me to watch her shuffle along trying to walk on three legs, trying to go potty with three legs, and no longer being able to chase bunnies and squirrels and butterflies.

I researched spiritual healing methods again, and decided on which method I would use to try for a healing for her. Again I daily, several times a day, faithfully performed spiritual healing techniques directing the healing energy at my dog's injured leg, and again logged the results into my journal. Since I couldn't know how she was feeling, the only journal entries I could make regarding her progress were what I observed from watching her and how she behaved.

Several weeks went by, and I didn't see any improvement in her condition even though I faithfully did the spiritual healing work daily. My journal was boring and repetitious with daily entries of "No progress or healing noted."

I was becoming discouraged because when I worked to heal my hand, I noticed great improvement within 24 hours, and complete healing within three days. Now, several weeks later, I could not see any change in my dog's condition. I asked myself:

Did spiritual healing really work, or not?

If it worked, why wasn't I seeing a healing in my dog?

Am I doing something wrong?

Maybe I didn't do it long enough - or often enough?

Should I try another technique?

What should I do next?

I felt trapped, despaired, and discouraged. Trapped because I didn't know what to do next, and despaired and discouraged because the veterinarians couldn't help her, prayer didn't heal her, and now, what if the spiritual healing technique didn't help either? Was I trapped with no way left to help her? Was she doomed to being a cripple for the rest of her life?

Because I didn't know what to do next, I decided to stick with the spiritual healing a little longer. I also combined my daily spiritual healing work with prayer, and did everything I could think of to help her even though the veterinarians said any efforts on my part would be in vain.

I rubbed her leg with alcohol and massaged it daily. In between the alcohol rubs, I applied expensive emu preparations to her entire leg, and gently exercised her leg muscles manually trying to bring life into them and slow up and/or get rid of the atrophy. Intermittently I also rubbed her leg with Ben Gay or Aspercreme hoping the different products might help her leg to heal. And, I continued to faithfully do my spiritual healing work for the healing of her leg. I also told God that I was not going to give up on her, I expected a healing and would work to realize it.

In addition to all of the above, I also had to work hard, very very hard, to maintain a positive attitude and fight growing discouragement, despair, and negative thoughts about her becoming healed. Every time the thought or idea came to me that she would not be healed/could not be healed, that I was foolish to think that spiritual healing or anything could help her, I deliberately replaced those negative thoughts with positive ones telling myself that she could be healed, she would be healed, and I forced myself to visualize a picture of her as being healed. I worked hard to mentally create pictures in my mind of her running like the wind, barking at squirrels and bunnies and butterflies as she chased them like she used to before her leg became injured

One day when we were out walking, I was doing my spiritual work for her leg as usual and as I was finishing up, I looked again at my dog limping along with her atrophying leg hanging from her body like a dead thing. I shouted to her leg (yes, to her leg) "Why aren't you healing?"And then I shouted to God and to the heavens, "Why aren't you healing her? God, please let her walk!"And in the instant of me crying out, with tears streaming down my face, it seemed as if the world stood still. I "felt"a heavy silence in the air. My dog's eyes were locked on me in a strange way, and there was a strange expression in her eyes. As I looked steadily at her wondering what her expression could mean, my dog moved her dead lifeless leg that hung from her shoulder, and put it on the ground. As I watched, she took one unsteady step on it, then another, then another. It had been months since she moved that leg, and now she was walking on it? I could hardly believe my eyes to see this, but yes - she was walking! Hurray!

The atrophy was gone, just like that, in an instant! I didn't know where it went or how it went, and I still don't know. I was in awe as I watched her walk, and felt that I was witnessing a miracle. It wasn't until some time later that I realized I had witnessed what is called a "spontaneous healing" meaning, healing came all at once. True, it took several weeks of spiritual work on my part before she became healed, but when the healing came, it happened all at once instead of slowly evolving.

On the day of her healing, my dog and I walked and walked and walked. I reveled in the joy and awe of her healing. Soon she was running and chasing bunnies and squirrels again. But, in my joy, I again began to question whether I had experienced a healing as a result of my spiritual healing work, or was this another coincidence? Did my dog's healing come about as a result of the many many times I rubbed and exercised her leg, and/or my unceasing prayers to God?

Well, the only way to know was to run another test again, and see what happens. I didn't have any more health issues to try to heal through spiritual healing so I wasn't sure how I could test spiritual healing a third time.

Healing #3

A few weeks later I was having lunch with a friend. As I was relaying my dog's healing to her, she told me about a skin condition she had that would not heal. She asked me if I wanted to try spiritual healing on her skin condition to see if spiritual healing would have any effect on the skin condition? She told me that she had been to several doctors, had taken several medications orally for it, and had applied several salves and creams to her skin externally, but the condition was stubborn and would not heal. I told her I would like to give it a try, so once again I researched techniques to decide which one I would like to try on her skin condition, and I faithfully and daily performed the spiritual healing techniques, applying them to her skin condition. It was understood between us that she would continue with her medication, and continue seeing her doctor even though I would be doing spiritual healing work for her. Her skin condition soon cleared up, and after a while, the doctor told her she could stop her medication.

That was three out of three attempts at spiritual healing wherein I realized healings. Each took a different amount of time and a different amount of work and effort to realize a healing. But each time I did realize a healing.

But again, I questioned them. What if these were coincidences? What if medications I applied to my dog's leg and the doctor's medications prescribed for my friend finally kicked in and were responsible for the healings?

As I pondered this situation, I decided that the next time a healing was needed, I would not do any spiritual healing work, would let things take their own course, and see what happened.

Testing the technique by doing nothing - Healing #4

A few months later I came down with the flu, and did no spiritual healing work at all for myself. I did see the doctor for whatever help he could give me because I was very sick and very miserable, and I faithfully took the medications he prescribed. When the worst flu symptoms cleared up, I just dragged along, not able to get much done, and generally did not feel good at all. I made repeated trips to the doctor for malaise (physical discomfort, lack of energy) over the next several weeks but did not realize any improvement.

I pondered the situation and asked myself, "Would I have healed more quickly and with less suffering if I practiced spiritual healing as I did during my first three tests?" Well, I certainly wasn't getting back to my normal self after my bout with the flu despite all the medications I was taking, so I thought I'd give spiritual healing a try and see what would happen, if anything. And lo, and behold, within a week after starting the spiritual healing work for myself, I was feeling better and at the end of two weeks I felt great and was able to stop all medications.

Another coincidence? Conclusions?

Did spiritual healing help me to get my energy back or was this yet another coincidence?" I asked myself. The only way to really get a conclusive answer was to continue my research, continue to record my results, and analyze things as I went along. It was amazing to me to learn in the months that followed, and then in the years that followed, that when I used spiritual healing, whether or not it was necessary to see the doctor, I always did realize: 1) relief from pain and suffering, 2) health improvements, and 3) healings at varying rates of speed and to varying degrees. Sometimes healing and/or improvements were slow to come but they did eventually come. And the times when I didn't use spiritual healing, or waited before using it, I didn't do as well.

Each time I analyzed my notes, the tally showed that overall I fared better when I used spiritual healing then when I didn't. I felt it was safe to conclude that spiritual healing really did have a positive effect in bringing about healings, and relief from pain and suffering. And that it worked whether I used the techniques for myself, for animals, or for other people.

Will spiritual healing work for you?

I want to say yes, but I can't promise you that it will. The only way you can know for sure is to try it, to test the techniques.

NOTE #1: Spiritual healing should NEVER replace medical care just as medical care should never replace the practice of spiritual healing. Each heals in a different way, and what one method can't heal, the other method often does. When used together, you have the greatest chance of becoming healed.

NOTE #2: Although I found that spiritual healing techniques do help a person to realize healing, I have also found that, just as doctors practicing medicine don't always heal or cure someone coming to them for healing, the same holds true for spiritual healing. Not everyone seeking spiritual healing becomes healed. This should not be a deterrent to seeking or practicing spiritual healing any more than doctors give up practicing medicine just because not everyone seeking healing through a doctor becomes cured or healed.

NOTE #3: Doing nothing at all to help one's self when healing is needed can lead to long periods of suffering and often a worsening of an unhealthy condition. Documentation proves that a greater number of healings and health improvements are realized when healing treatments are used (whether the treatments be medical healing treatments, spiritual healing treatments, or a combination of both) then by doing nothing at all (not seeking any type of healing) and hoping for the best.

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