persona art and vent. im so ugly its so hard to draw myself

Star, Pandora and Andy

“ im not as holy as you may think ” - Pandora

Andy with his favroite Pokémon Poliwag! h

Andy in the tub! he loves cleancore

Ha ha I’m in Pain™️

First doodle of 2021.

Work update!

Streamed the process of doing the rainbow gradient and shading (twitch is lady_helheim)

I also worked on my spoons (which will hopefully be on YouTube when they’re finished).

I moved some around so you could see all the ends. I did some skull spoons too.

I’m sure I’ll make these into both individual stickers, but I also want to try to make some sticker packs (I’ll see how they cut when these are done).

Started to colour some spoons

I finished the line work for the spoons as well. I don’t have an image for the finished line work. So the ones missing from this image is the triple Moon symbol and the batwing

But I have a planchette end as well!

I’ll be posting updates as I go, but I am trying to record most of this work to make a video. I will probably talk about spoon theory in it and why I like/use it.

It’s not for everyone! Not all people who are chronically ill use spoon theory! And that’s ok too!

star loves gloomy bear! they wanted me to draw them in a gloomy bear hoodie so i did ^^

Current mood

Miniature tiger’s progress preview.

An example of a Before VS After, stripped down.

Sketches from yesterday and today.

Migraine last night and it was making my teeth hurt. I hate the feeling because it’s like something cold has covered my teeth and check bones.

Then this morning I felt like a marionette when I woke up this morning. My body would not listen to me and get up. Took about 20 or so minutes to get my body to sit up. Another 5 before I could get off the bed.

Finished the trash panda. I love them.

I have a commission for a friend and a lot of ideas written down right now. I’ll see if I can make a post with said ideas as an update.

As an update, my head space ain’t doing so well. I am okay, but there is a cloud making itself known.

My husband got a job in Anchorage, Alaska and that means my family is moving there from NYC. His job is helping but none-the-less this is a pricey movie that my aunt is helping to fund. All the same, any money i can earn ‘til then will be a big help, especially as it’s going to cost anywhere from $2k-$4k to move our cats.

That means, BIG SALE!

15% off on all my shirts in the shop!

Every sale goes to helping my family and our cats get through this move!

I officially have a crowdfunding open to raise money for the mushroom mothman stickers! The goal is $500! If we reach $1000 I’ll /also/ be ordering iron-on patches of mothman! I’d really appreciate it if even if you can’t afford to donate if you’d at least share! This is all-or-nothing, so I have to have raised the minimum of $500 by August 14th to keep the money and buy the stickers and equipment with it! Donating $8 automatically gets you a mothman sticker, donating $10 gets you a fresno nightcrawler sticker, and donating $30 gets both an Iron-on Patch AND a sticker of your choice!

 https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/mushroom-cryptids/x/23906956#/

I’ve been wrestling a lot in the last couple of weeks with old anxieties about whether I’m using my time ‘right.’ There’s a ton of advice out there about the kind of discipline it takes to be a 'real’ (ie professional) writer or artist. But the truth is right now my priority needs to be taking care of myself and managing my illness. My commitment to any of my creative projects has to be tempered by that. It works better for me to have a lot of different projects going, so I can slot in the one that fits my energy level at any given time. I worry that these limits will prevent me from ever being 'successful’ in the sense of money or attention. I can’t handle deadlines, so I’m not sure anyone in the industry will want to work with me. And I can’t produce consistently, which seems to be the main thing it takes to build a base online. I don’t know. But giving up has no appeal at all, so I guess we’ll see.

“It’s okay,” she whispered, “you don’t have to love me.”

He looked into her eyes trying to understand.

“I never expected you to love me. Not in the way I love you.”

“I don’t know what to say.” He spoke as he looked to his feet. “I don’t understand.”

She sighed with a sad smirk, “I see the way you look at her. How your whole being comes alive when you catch a glimpse. You were in love far before you met me. I never stood a chance.”

”Leah, it’s not like that. You know she’s—“

“—Just a friend?” Leah interrupted. “You are not a good liar, Aiden.”

Aiden stood there, not knowing what to say.

“I want you to be happy. Even if it’s not with me.” She swallowed.

Aiden grasped Leah gently, “I don’t want to lose you.”

“I’m not going anywhere.” She spoke softly.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

Dissolve Me- self portrait