I wanted someone strong who could protect me. I let his anger fester and infect me. His solution is a lie, no one here deserves to die. Except for me, and the monster I created.
Interpretation of each given line broken down numerically:
I wanted someone strong who could protect me.: He wanted his mother, someone, anyone to protect him, and they failed. They either didn't see him struggle, they turned the other way, or they left. Even eight years after the last time we see him call for help, he still calls. There is still a childish belief he holds, for someone to be his hero. Slay the evil dragon. Free him from his lonely tower.
I let his anger fester and infect me. : Rage is something Neil Hargrove has in abundance, and there is no room for anything else. It is indeed infectious, and Billy takes his mother's place as Patient Zero. There are no positive energies around him. There is no rest for him. The Hargrove house is a prison of pain for Billy, and his father is his warden. Neil's hatred is overflowing, and Billy is drowning in it. He survives by absorbing it, and manifesting it. The cure for this disease is something he cannot find, although he looks for it endlessly. This line also ties into Billy's possession. How he might blame himself for being vulnerable to the Mind Flayer.
His solution is a lie/No one here deserves to die: Again this goes for Neil's blatant prejudices and how he expresses his anger (taking it out on his family, but Billy is his main target and he uses him as an indirect instrument for his rage)- as well as the Mind Flayer's whole "we are going to end everyone" speech. But in the end with El's help, Billy fights the Mind Flayer both internally and then externally.
Except for me: Billy sacrifices himself for El and her friends. He puts himself in front of a girl he hardly knows, and for the first time since he was a kid, he fought a monster. Looked it straight in the eye. To protect someone who showed him the foreign act of kindness and a gentle touch. Reminded him of happier times.
And the monster I created: In his final words to Max, he says "I'm sorry". These two words hold a great weight to the both of them. He's sorry for hurting her, for hurting her friends. He believes he is the monster in Max's life, even if that's who he had to be to protect her from Neil.
Tags:
@harringroveho
@whoringrove
@geormenia
@emeraldwitches
@ouizzyharringrove
@thatawkwardlittlefangirl
@wixterirox
@spaceboxkitty
@polaris-ursae
@shipworm
@lazybakerart (I got inspired by that ask mentioning another part of this song- I hope it's okay that I tagged you 😌)
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tagged by beloved @tisthedamnseasns 💕
shuffle your ‘on repeat’ playlist and post the first ten tracks:
1. francis forever - mitski
2. misery loves company - rebecca black
3. running out of time - paramore
4. welcome to my island - caroline polachek
5. easier than lying - halsey
6. mean it - lauv, lany
7. it’s not living (if it’s not with you) - the 1975
8. die for you - joji
9. stay soft - mitski
10. look at you - rebecca black
tagging my sexy moots 😚❤️: @holi-holy @funky-birb @gidguard @kuminemo @kochana-lulu @thenelse @marc-here @mrokat @niehaused @femmme
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Did I just make an entire Playlist based off of the most loveable and fuckable Clown on YouTube after discovering that there were no Playlists based on him on Spotify?
Yes. Yes I did.
You're Welcome fellow Clown lovers
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look at the scrunklez!!!!
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Credit: Pinterest!!!
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honestly the whole doja cat situation is just crazy bc i dont know whats wilder—dating a documented groomer/pedophile and blocking everyone (including his victims) who warns you about said abuse and THEN bashing and snapping on fans for wanting you to explain yourself
OR—still supporting her after all that and happily waiting for another album like she aint say she hates all of you!
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so,, is julie and the phantoms in anyone else’s top artists?
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"give me more than just love, give me everything in between"
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This happened a couple months ago, but I must share bc it won't leave my head today.
So, I've been listening to character playlists for a while now, especially while driving. Well, I had to drive my very Christian, very conservative mother to Walmart. The struggle every time I drive her is finding music that she doesn't not approve of. A worse struggle each time.
Well I figured that the Underswap Papyrus, Stretch, playlist by 🏳️⚧️Casual Clownery🏳️⚧️ on Spotify should be safe enough because I knew it was mostly love songs and similar vibes. Could easily skip the more explicit songs, like "Squidward Nose" and "Shit," in it with buttons on my wheel. Of course though, in true Stretch fashion, the first song that plays is "The Penis (Eek)". I start sweating because she was watching the screen as I was getting the music together. She questioned it and I quickly noted that I didn't make the playlist and tried to figure out quickly what song it was in the vast library of music in my head. Then it clicked, it was just a silly, I would consider almost clowncore, song that had no words and let her know that it was just a silly song with no lyrics and that I didn't know why it was named that. And with that I was able to make it out of the clear for the rest of the trip.
On the way back I took the Underfell Papyrus approach, playlist creator same as before, cause I knew there was more classic rock which she likes. She only questioned the first song it played, but she's heard it in the car when I've been driving before so idk. To disclose the song it was "Chop Suey!" by System of a Down.
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So, Tumblr is banned in my home country. Expect slow activity because I don’t have internet access all the time either and it’s very hard to use VPNs here.
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