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#starting to get over this crush ive had for 2-3 years
sunsuns-babie · 2 months
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If I Get My Way {K.SUNOO x F!READER}
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IN WHICH: Kim Seonwoo aka Sunoo is a Sophomore at Decelis University and has a crush on the pretty Music Education Major Y/n Marsh. Seems like a match made in heaven since he’s also a Music Education Major and has had a crush on her since Freshman year when he met her at orientation… well sort of. He’s a little delusional about her but that’s okay, right? When finally given the opportunity to get to know her and potentially date her some weird things start happening that Sunoo doesn’t quite understand… which leads to the postponement of his grand plan to confess his feelings for Y/n. At the end of the day does he get the girl or does he miss out and think of what could’ve been?
ALSO IN WHICH: Sunoo and Y/n’s friends also have their own storylines and side quest relationships happening simultaneously with theirs.
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PAIRING: Kim Sunoo x !Female Reader (ft. Mystery Character 1 & Mystery Character 2)
GENRE: Non-Idol AU, College/University AU, SMAU
WARNING: Swearing, sexual jokes/comments, allusion to sexual activity, attempts at humor (I don’t think I’m funny but I’m trying), jokes about murder/killing oneself, and Danielle from NewJeans as the face claim.
FEATURING: Lee Heeseung (EN—), Jay Park (EN—), Jake Sim (EN—), Park Sunghoon (EN—), Yang Jungwon (EN—), NI-KI (EN—), Jang Wonyoung (IVE), Shin Ryujin (ITZY), Choi Yeonjun (TXT), Choi Soobin (TXT), Choi Beomgyu (TXT), Karina (aespa), NingNing (aespa), Huh Yunjin (LE SSERAFIM), Yoon Keeho (P1HARMONY), Anton Lee (riize), Hwang Yeji (ITZY), and mentions of various other idols.
status: ongoing
start: Feb. 12, 2024
end:
DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction and is in no way a real depiction of the idols portrayed in it and has no actual connection to their real world selves. I don’t know them I’m just using their image for characters in a fictional story.
A/N: This is my first SMAU ever I’ve written stories on other platforms in the past and kind of stopped to be a reader for awhile but I recently got an idea for a story and wanted to try and make it a reality. So please forgive me if it’s bad I’ll try my best to make it enjoyable for you. But I barely know how to work Tumblr as a creator or writer so forgive me if this is all over the place 😭😭😭.
A/N 2: If you want to be added to the taglist for this SMAU you can comment on this post or which ever chapter you see first!
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INCOMING MESSAGES…
PROFILES: 2 HOT 4 U LONER BOYS CLUB (ft. 2 Baddies)
01: bitch boy
02: you’re not my mom
03: DDEONU GOOD!!!
03.5: bonus chapter 1
04: we going on a date 🤪
04.5: bonus chapter 2
05: free food + written part (755 wrds)
06: blasting Olivia Rodrigo traitor
07: Love changes a man ❤️❤️
07.5: bonus chapter 3
08: keeho is a furry confirmed ✅
08.5: bonus chapter 4 [written part] (1,304 wrds)
09: KILLING MYSELF [POSTPONED]
10: tba….
10.5: bonus chapter 5
11: tba…
12: tba…
13: tba…
14: tba…
15: tba…
16: tba…
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19: tba…
20: tba…
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cupidlovesastro · 4 months
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𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒐 𝒍𝒖𝒄𝒊𝒅 𝒅𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎
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this is very different from my regular post, but i thought i’d do a post about this because i have a good understanding of this topic and i like doing it😭
the only things that your really going to need to do this is dreaming often and willpower. you don’t need to be super experienced at ANYTHING or do all these “methods” that people tell you to follow. just utilize the power of your brain !
for context, i started doing this around 13-14. i never had a bad experience with it and i very very rarely have nightmares. maybe 3 once a year, and i dream every single night. also, this is about how i did it and accomplished it !
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1. gain consciousness in your dream
instead of mindlessly dreaming like you may do at times, try to gain consciousness in your dream. by that i mean, look at your dream and really pay attention to what’s going on. what do you see, hear, taste, feel? where are you? who are you with? start to pay attention to your dreams because then, you will teach yourself how to understand and actually remember your dreams when you wake up instead of waking up and having no clue what you dreamed of. do this for about a week or so before proceeding to the next step
my experience
when i do this, usually i realize im in a dream because im somewhere ive never been before, or im with people i never see, or something is somewhere it isn’t supposed to be. so when i realize im dreaming, i often tell myself “oh im in a dream”
2. explore a little
so now that you’ve realized your dream, walk around, start thinking of what you may want to say to someone in your dream, music you want to hear, food you want to, etc
my experience
this part is one of the fun parts. you can now start to control yourself and what you do in that realm. so i’ve talked to people i know in real life in my dreams, even people i don’t know. i’ve walked around places i’ve never been as well
3. start controlling things that are already in your dream
so before we get to the part where we control our entire dream, let’s start controlling things our brain has already created. so if you see a person try to control that person to talk to you, if you see a cat try to get that cat to come to you, change the color of the room your in, etc. this will help with your control over your subconscious mind, and is a little more difficult than step 2 because instead of controlling yourself, your controlling the outside world now
my experience
this for me is a little difficult for the main reason being that you have to put a lot of focus and control in it. with step 2 it’s pretty easy to do because you already are aware of yourself in your dream, you just have to control yourself. but with this part you have to control other things, which i’ve done. get someone to talk to me, or changed rooms i was in.
4. create things and / or make things disappear
now we want to sort of form our reality. so you want to start thinking of what you want to see, touch, experience, etc. if you want to see a celebrity, then do it, or if your into manifesting, view your manifestation(s). as for the disappearing part, let’s say you see something that you dislike, try to make it disappear.
my experience
i’ve done this a lotttt but usually it’s unintentional. like i’ll thinking about how i want to see someone, and they’ll appear in my dream. but in the very few nightmares ive had, ive also had to make this disappear 😭
5. create your reality
similar to what i mentioned earlier about what you want in your reality, now you want to completely create that reality. if you want to be at the beach with your friend then create that, or if you want to see your crush/ lover then create them !
my experience
this is the funnest part ofc, and i don’t usually need to create entire realities, but i have created people and things i’ve wanted to see, hear, touch, taste, etc
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fairyhaos · 1 year
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seventeen and being office workers
requested by @turquoisefluff-1767: "Could you please write about how the SVT members would behave as colleagues working in a corporate office set-up? The recent office-themed FML concept photographs and a strong urge to escape my own monotonous office routine has made me rather curious about this concept. Thank you!"
notes: i tried my best! i've never actually worked in an office before lmao so this is based solely on books ive read and the meagre research i tried to do about it ^-^
masterlist
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seungcheol:
assistant manager, but probably ends up working overtime bc he's taking on his duties along with the manager's duties too bc the other guy is so lazy. was the supervisor for dino for almost 2 years bc the manager forgot to actually hire him. has approved approximately 60% of the successful projects within his department. is secretly plotting to get the manager fired so he can take his position and get the higher pay
jeonghan:
company favourite. has been asked to be the face of the company a total of three times since he's joined. comes in half an hour late every single day, is the loudest to complain when wonwoo's coffee is too bitter. organises the halloween event. and the valentines event. rigged the secret santa so everyone picked the person they wanted the least, was exposed not even a week after the event
joshua:
either is glued to his desk or nowhere near it. the lovely colleague, everyone approaches him with concerns bc he always looks so willing to listen. nods along rlly seriously as someone talks to him, but afterwards the only advice he gives is "just kill it/them". however, is always the one that people go to when they can't figure out how to work excel. somehow knows all those spreadsheet hacks that everyone forgets after going through high school
junhui:
resident biscuit supplier in the break room. he's just doing a corporate job for fun tbh, bc he's actually fucking loaded and was bored and needed something to do in his spare time. emails cat pictures to everyone while at work. is somehow always the one that jeonghan picks to stay behind w him to decorate the office before an event the next day. secretly the department ace even tho he has no idea what he did that was so brilliant
hoshi:
always has beef with the photocopier. can be found slapping and kicking the thing at least 3 times a week and if not, then he's probably squinting at the login screen wondering why the blasted machine has locked him out again. gets drunk at every single company dinner, has to be dragged out before he can start loudly exposing everyone on how much they hate their manager
wonwoo:
everyone complains when he's in charge of making the coffee for the day bc it's always way too bitter and so strong. even so, practically half the department has a crush on him bc he's the handsome, quiet guy who is just so everyone's type. has to be wheedled and convinced into coming to any company dinners and gatherings bc he'd much rather ruin his eyes by continuing to stare at a screen when he gets home n play his computer games
woozi:
everyone goes to him for tech problems rather than actually ringing up anyone in their IT department. had everyone terrified of him for a good 5 months when they first join bc all they've heard about him are the horror stories of him beating someone up with a computer keyboard. associate manager in seungcheol's department, has approved the other 40% of successful projects even though it's not even his job
minghao:
only ever arrives the exact second he's supposed to come to work. leaves as soon as the work day is over. comes in with a flurry of silk scarves and fancy coats like a designer whirlwind, peering at everyone judgingly over his glasses. gets asked why a fancy person like him is working in such a monotonous job every month. always just laughs in response and sips his black coffee
mingyu:
probably works in marketing. idk why, he just gives that kind of vibe. is being promoted like every year bc he's just so vigorous and passionate about his job. as soon as the weather no longer looks in danger of being freezing, he's ditching his blazer and Only wears his dress shirt that makes his biceps look good without even trying. walks in and is immediate taking his coat off, flexing his arms and smirking at the squeals as he goes to his desk
dokyeom:
seems to be the only one who genuinely adores his job. or maybe that's just him loving his colleagues. acts the most surprised when junhui's cookies are gone within the day he brings them in, tries to discreetly wipe away the crumbs around his mouth as he's helping the guy narrow down the list of suspects. invites everyone to the nearby bar every friday, ends up convincing another person to pay
seungkwan:
has the biggest smile on his face every single day. tells everyone to cheer up in the break room whenever they've had a bad day, but is always complaining about how much he hates his job whenever he can. still with the big smile on his face. knows all the gossip, even amongst all the interns
vernon:
also knows all the gossip, for some reason. never spills anything unless he's been bribed with the expensive cookies that junhui sometimes buys. is always standing there awkwardly in the back of the break room whenever a breakup or something dramatic is happening. the only one who tries to help hoshi every time he has trouble with the photocopier. walks away like nothing happened when he manages to make it worse and has the machine spilling ink everywhere
chan:
was an intern for way too long before he was actually hired to work at the company. as a result, knows the ins and outs of the photocopiers way too well. still never helps hoshi when he gets stuck tho, bc it's just so funny to watch him swear and kick the machine. the funniest at company dinners, is always doing his impressions and showing off his made-up characters in his skits which leaves everyone in stitches
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currently taking requests
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number1jeonginstan · 7 months
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Coffee Pt.2
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Jeongin x afab!reader (enemies to lovers)
part I part III part IV
A/N: I knew I said I didn't know when I was going to write the next part but... when inspiration hits it hits. Anyways, please comment if you want to be part of my tag list!!! I'm still pretty new to using tumblr so please bear with me!
WC: 1.3k
CW: Just swearing I think idk what else
“Aww is poor baby going to cry” you said throwing another ping pong ball. You stared at Jeongin as it landed straight in the cup. “Maybe I should have bet more” you shrugged. 
They had 2 cups left while you and Seungmin still had 6. “You know what, let’s up the anty” Jeongin said and you were intrigued. “If I win, you buy me the shirt and…” he pondered to himself for a second “You give me head as an apology” he grinned at you. 
Before you can even speak, Seungmin replied for you “If you wanted your dick sucked so bad you should have asked the girl who was on you like a leech earlier, I don’t want you trying to get into y/n’s pants.” 
“Awwww does Seungmin have a little crush on his “little sister”” using air quotes around little sister taunting him, “or are you scared you are going to lose?” he cocked his head to the side. “You know what, fuck you, I’ll do it” you stated confidence flowing through you “and if I win, you have to grovel on your knees and apologize to me and buy me coffee for the rest of the year as an apology.” 
“Fine, but get ready to lose. And Seungmin, I have the perfect maid outfit for you to wear while you clean our bathroom.” You look at Seungmin confused “Our bathroom?” 
“Did Seungmin not tell you, we share a room here because there aren’t enough, meaning when you want to hang out with Minnie over here, you also have to hang out with me angel.” He smirked at you like he was proud of himself.  
“y/n, you don’t have to do this, we don’t have to bet this far. I don’t want you to lose.” you cut him off “Minnie have I ever lost a game of beer pong?” You looked at him with your doe eyes “No…” he replied “Exactly, and I do not think I’m gonna lose that 3 year streak today” 
You guys were tied one to one, it was your turn and you felt like you were gonna vomit. Sure you were confident, but you’ve never blown someone off before, the farthest you’ve gotten is second base in the back of your ex’s car during a football game in high school. You aren’t scared of sex, but you’ve never had the need to find someone to fuck. The only person who knows this about you is Seungmin because you blurted it out to him when you guys got drunk together the first time and he consoled you and told you it’s fine, everyone has their own time and their own person, and that stuck with you. 
As you threw your last shot in, it landed straight into the cup. You started bouncing around and jumped into Seungmin’s arms. “I TOLD YOU” you screamed and kissed his cheek, something you guys have always done. 
Jeongin just glared at you guys making Chan chug down the last cup, already feeling tipsy. You congratulate Chan for a job well done. “You are so cute,” he said to you. “You should come around more often, I like your energy and I feel like the other boys would too.” 
“I don’t think she should, she doesn’t know how to own up to her mistakes,” Jeongin said directly to Chan acting like you weren’t even there. “What do you mean by my mistakes? We agreed that whoever won would apologize. Actually, not even apologize, but grovel, so start groveling Yang Jeongin.” You glared at him, waiting for him to get on his knees and apologize, but instead, he came centimeters from your face.
“Suck. My. Dick.” each word enunciated with such hatred and disgust. You scoff in his face “I thought a bet was a bet? Isn’t that what you said?” 
“Come on Innie, don’t be a dick and just apologize, I don’t know what’s gotten into you, you are usually so nice” Chan stated slurring his words a little from drinking almost all of the cups. 
“Yeah Innie,” you said “Don’t be a dick and apologize” you pout at him. “Is it that hard to admit you are wrong?” you poke at his chest “Or are you just an egotistical maniac who gets off on making other people angry?”
“That’s it y/n, why don’t we get a breather?” Seungmin tried to drag you away, but you whine in protest “But he hasn’t apologized for ruining my shirt and spilling coffee all over me.” 
“If an apology is what you want, that’s what you are going to get,” he said “I’m sorry that you are stupid and can’t watch where you are going.” He started coming closer to you, a cup of the same liquid Sana was drinking earlier. “And I am oh so sorry for this,” he said with a grin. pouring the contents of the drink all over you. 
Your white shirt was stained pink and you could feel the liquid seeping through your skirt. “What the fuck!” you yelled. Your cheeks turn red in anger while Seungmin watches in awe. 
“Aw, did the poor girl not my apology?” he said with a fake pout. “What is your problem Jeongin?” you almost started crying but Seungmin pulled you away taking you to his room. 
As soon as you guys went up the stairs into their shared room, you broke down. Tears were streaming down your face, and you could feel your clothes clinging onto your body. “Don’t cry y/n” Seungmin was trying to console you, but it made you feel even worse. “I don’t know why he did that, but why don’t you go take a shower, get all of that pink shit off of you. I’ll give you a towel and some of my clothes.” 
You rubbed your eyes, feeling your mascara running. “Thanks, Minnie, I knew I could count on you.” You started giggling seeing him running around his shared room trying to find a shirt for you. “Of course, anything for my little loser,” he said again whilst ruffling your hair. “I’m gonna go back down to give you some privacy, there should be makeup wipes in one of the draws left over from Halloween.” 
You gave him a puzzled look and he replied “I wanted to dress as Pororo, I had to have a white face so I used face paint. Do you have a problem with that?” You started to giggle, “I do not, but I’m praying you have a picture so I can send it to your older sister.”
“I do have a picture, but I am sure as hell not letting you see it y/n. I would need to be on my deathbed” Seungmin said with a stoic face. “I can arrange for that to happen” you replied only to get the shirt thrown at your face. 
“Go shower before someone tries to break down my door and fuck in here.” Seungmin pleaded before closing the door to his room.
The layout of the room was kind of basic. There were two beds, each full-sized, and a walk-in closet. Before going into the conjoined bathroom, you went inside the closet. You could automatically tell which side was Seungmin’s, seeing his Spider-Man pajamas in the corner from when you guys had a Marvel-themed movie marathon and sleepover with the rest of the theater kids. You could also see the shirt that Jeongin messed up when he spilled coffee over the both of you guys. You genuinely felt bad for running his shirt, but you couldn’t get over the fact he didn’t apologize to you. He was being an ass for no reason, you would have offered to pay for his dry cleaning if he wasn’t being so rude.
After you finish your snooping, you finally go to shower, pondering if you should wash your hair or not since the drink was already soaking it. You opted for it and turned on the shower letting the warm water fall upon you. Everything was peaceful surrounded by the warm heat almost like it was a hug, that was until you heard a knock on the bathroom door. 
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morkofday · 4 months
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Hello 🤗 Which were your top 5 moments when you just knew the person on screen was in love?
i'm very sorry i'm a bit late with this but you know, life :'D i thought about this already before but only had the time to make this into a post now!
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My Top 5 BL WhippedTM Moments
(or where i knew they were in love/feeling something/some type of way about a situation – sorry i took some liberties here)
I. Mork fixing Day's hair in Last Twilight episode 3
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i know this doesn't exactly fit (maybe?) bc i cannot say if mork is quite in love here yet but this scene is glorious in showing a character realize they have feelings. the way mork pauses and just keeps stroking day's hair and wondering his face, if he likes it, if he likes him, and then has to snap out of it bc he gets so into his head – it's amazing. i love this scene. and it shows that mork did fall first, argue with the wall.
II. Yai seeing Jom for the first time in I Feel You Linger in the Air episode 1 & 2
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sorry i couldn't find the exact moment as a gif so this will have to do. i just love how in the first episode, when yai first sees jom drop into the water from the boat, you can already see he's in love. i never questioned that it wasn't love at first sight for him – bc it so obviously was. he was gone the moment his eyes landed on jom and i really gotta admire the actor (bright? is that his name?) for so perfectly showing that.
III. Jaewon watching Jihyun fall asleep on his shoulder in The Eights Sense episode 2
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these two are less obvious about their feelings bc of, well, reasons, but you can see it all here. i know jaewon goes through a journey before really accepting himself and those feelings, but jihyun is so comfortable about his own. but in this moment, you can see jaewon's walls cracking right open. he's extremely fond. and he's happy to have this moment, to be close to jihyun like this. also, i am just weak for sleeping scenes.
IV. Tien watching over Lomfon when he's sick in La Pluie episode 10
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this is a perfect scene combining a character being sick, them falling asleep, and another character pining for them. you can see how badly in love tien is with lomfon at this point and it's astounding considering where they started. tien used to hate lomfon's guts with a passion but was the first one to realize and accept his feelings for him. i think in this scene you can see how much it hurts him to feel this way while lomfon is still figuring it all out.
V. Joke digs his own grave with Zo in Hidden Agenda episode 3
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it always amuses me to no end when a character who has a secret crush insists on putting themselves into Situations with their secret crush. bc in most occasions, that backfires when they cannot handle those situations. that's joke as a character. and i love this scene for how ridiculous it is bc joke knows what he's doing and then he's the one who runs away from it. he's so stupid. it's adorable.
Bonus: Gun Gawin with Boss Cher in Our Skyy 2 x A Boss and a Babe episode 1
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idk i just adore the look gun gives cher any time he has a chance. this man is so gone. he is so content just watching his bf be silly and adorable. you can literally see the hearts in his eyes and the syrup dripping from his lips. what a sap.
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thank you so much for this ask and happy new year to you!! ♥
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cptnbeefheart · 1 year
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now that ABOM issue 1 is published, i can post my contribution :] please do not repost unless you clearly credit me!!
here’s an obnoxious explanation of all my choices that is probably way too much information :
I find the most interesting aspect of the monkees to be their era of deconstructing the image that TV & studio execs had so carefully crafted. in the process of preserving this image, these execs had created somewhat palatable characters, caricatur-izing (sorry.) elements of the casts’ real personalities. the artists themselves were given an illusion of control over their brand, rarely getting the opportunity to publish the art that they made themselves.
ANYWAY.. tying this all into my piece .. i wanted to make something dedicated to frustrations felt by all members of the monkees. Peter is in the front, making strides toward the edge of the chessboard; the monkeemobile flooring it to stand in his way. I wanted the image of a monkee crushing something that was a major symbol in the show itself. what’s more iconic than the monkee mobile itself ?! my hope is that this shows autonomy on peters part, his true self contradicting this false image created by execs-- no longer a pawn for them! of course peter was the first to quit, which is why he is taking the lead. Mike was next, buying himself out of his contract in order to publish his own music and take control of his artistic career. even throughout the brainstorming process for this, i knew i wanted to put mike in his flashy (but fabulous) nudie suit. to me its such a foreshadowing of what he would go on to do in his solo career and with the first national band. i had to CONTAIN MYSELF because i didnt want mike to have a whole bunch of detail and not fit in with the rest of the subjects.. Mike is looking straight toward the audience, realizing he would like to pursue creative projects that would not be possible working with the monkees™ and everything that they symbolize. Davy looks for the edge of the chessboard, contemplating whether or not he should leave. Micky, wearing his outfit from Head (1968), holds a remote control. This is all in reference to the imagery seen in the film; he finally has the option to change the channels for himself. I actually used a screenshot from the movie to get his face & hair right. I think in the 2 years filming the show micky started embracing his curls, but the only references from a upward angle were when he was straightening his hair !!!! I ended up using the scene where he blows up the Coke machine, a satisfied smirk on his face. what an appropriate scene. finally the chessboard, white rabbits & wind up toys. I don’t think I really need to explain that aside from mentioning that the image of the wind-ups is from 33 1/3 Revolutions Per Monkee (1969). I think this was the last official monkees thing Peter was in (outside of future reunion tours). The television special echos the themes already present in Head, so i felt like it would be a nice addition. And it shows the monkees as pawns versus having full autonomy. WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY LAST POINT ONE MORE THING ITS QUICK I PROMMY okay perpective ! I wanted to do an upward shot because First of all its fun but more importantly . it shows the cast themselves have outgrown their characters :] now who knows if ive succeeded in any of the things i attempted but at least i had fun :] and feeling like charlie iasip pepe silvia is healthy every once in a while...
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Just A Project | IV
Nathan Prescott x Reader
Masterlist
Parts: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Warnings: none really, this is basically jus filler
Words: 644
I’m finally in my dorm hall, completely exhausted, I miss my bed. As I’m walking down the hall I pass Dana’s room, and hear her usual music playing. “Hey, Y/N!” I hear Dana call, and I turn around, walking to stand in her doorway. “What’s up Dana?” She's sitting on her bed, legs criss crossed, in one of her cute pj sets. She always looks effortlessly pretty. “Come in, sit!” She invites me into patting the space in front of her on the bed. I accept the invitation, I always enjoy our chats.
As I sit down in front of her she speaks, “How have you been girl? We haven’t spoken in a while.” She isn’t wrong, recently she's been kind of distracted with her new guy friend, Trevor. “I’ve been pretty good, Dana. How about you? You know, with Trevor and everything.” She smiles. “Oh, Y/N, Trevor is great. He’s different from everyone else. And I enjoy hanging with him and his skater friends. No drama.” I smile, I’m glad that she's happy. Dana’s had it rough, freshman and sophomore year, everyone was convinced she was a whore just because some stupid jock made a comment about how she dressed. She only managed to get past it around a year ago. I was there for her through it all, because I know Dana. She’s been one of my best friends over the past few years, I have her back and she has mine.
“I’m so glad you’re happy, Dana. Trevor seems like he's really good for you.” I tell her honestly. Her smiles widen, “Thanks, Y/N. That's sweet.” She reaches out grabbing my hand and holds it between hers. “Oh, I heard from Kate that you got paired with Nathan for that project thing.” I sigh still with a small smile on my face. “Yeah, uhm, you know I’ve never really talked to him before today and to be honest, he’s not that bad.” I look down feeling a bit naive about my quick judgment about Nathan. I raise my eyes to try and see her reaction and she’s smiling.
“Oh my god!” I look up fully at her outburst. “You’re totally blushing, Y/N!” My eyes widen and I go defensive. “What? Am not!” I am… I wouldn’t go as far to say I have a crush on him but after today I think I definitely feel something for him. “Liar, you so are!” She laughs and rubs my hand that she’s still holding. “Don’t worry Y/N/N, I won’t tell anyone.” I smile at her, “Thanks.” We’re silent for a moment before Dana speaks up. “But for real, I get it, Nathan isn’t a bad guy. Not that I’ve seen at least. His dad is the fucked up one. And Nathan only gets seriously angry when someone genuinely deserves it. Even if sometimes he goes too far.” She speaks kindly.
I think over her words, they make sense. I mean yes I’ve seen Nathan get a little intense, but at the same time, Nathan does have genuine friends. Including Dana, which can only be a green flag. I let out a sigh. “I guess I should give him a genuine chance. He seems nice enough.” I say, making eye contact with Dana. “You should, I mean, you never know what could come out of it.” She smirks and gives me a wink. I let out a groan as blush came across my face once again, and pulled my hand away from her dramatically. She laughs wholeheartedly and I stand up from my place on her bed.
“Well, I am in dire need of a nap.” I start to back up and Dana stands up and attacks me with a hug. We giggle together and she lets go. “Bye, Y/N.” I walk out with a, “Bye, Dana!”
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princessofxianle · 4 months
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Do you mind if I ask your top 10 favorite characters (can be male or female) from all of the media that you loved (can be anime/manga, books, movies or tv series)? And why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....Thanks...
well THANK YOU for asking, you are the first to!
tbh ive been meaning to do this on my main blog bc I take these wayyy too seriously lol but ANYWAY heres my top 10 faves (in no particular order) that I can think of (tbh theres prob more i forgot about, or i wanted to keep only 1 per fandom... except tgcf)
Huge Spoiler Warning: for ALL of tgcf, 2ha, aot, AND JJK MANGA!!!
1. Feng Xin (tgcf)
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do i even need to explain this one? loyal to a fault, just a cute lil puppy, one hell of a sculpted archers back, and he's head over heels in love with Xie Lian (but tbh same) i have a lot of thoughts about him on a daily basis on this blog (and also theres the #fx backstory au tag)
2. Noé Archiviste (the Case Study of Vanitas)
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MY BABY
the absolute bestest boy of EVER... with a LOAD of unprocessed trauma (yknow the typical stuff like seeing your childhood bff get decapitated in front of you) and a lot more to come once we find out how he kills his boyfriend best friend, Vanitas...
i ALSO think about him a lot but over on @noes-pillow
3. Sejanus Plinth (The Hunger Games: tbosas)
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hated reading as a child... HATED it... picked up the og trilogy when i was 12 and i was a goner. The funny thing is i still hated reading for YEARS up until i picked up the prequel novel then in 2020, and now ive read all of tgcf, 2ha, and more fanfic than i could ever imagine... all because this stupid boy (i love him) chose to trust the WORST person as his friend, rip sejanus my baby
the movie is v good btw, if you havent seen it you should
4. Xie Lian (tgcf)
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*Taizi Dianxia Fang Xin Guoshi General Hua Xie Lian*
how this man survived 800 years of being physically unable to die and never went insane is a mystery i will never be able to fully comprehend (aaand im in love with him... hmm i wonder why...)
5. Mihael "Mello" Keehl (Death Note)
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the chocolate-addicted blonde boi that was my first anime crush... by proxy I must also add Mail "Matt" Jeevas because they are a package deal
these two are also the reason i started writing fanfic so they will ALWAYS hold a special place in my heart
6. Xue Meng - (2ha)
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*sigh* he's just everyone's fav peacock (yes technically the image is XM 0.5 but he had a cool ass bird so im using this photo bc its COOL anyway...) mengmeng is another one of my trauma bois who has lost next to everything and yet is STILL kicking ass and taking names #thatsmyfuckingsectleader so proud of you my son
also this might get me into hot water here but imma go ahead and say it...
this is what i wanted Jiang Cheng to be... (i LOVE my angy grape but...) through thick and thin, despite EVERYTHING, and even mo ran fucking abandoning him he will still call mo ran his "ge"...
fgjhdfhfdg THEYRE BROTHERS, OKAY???
7. Howl Pendragon (Howl's Moving Castle)
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ok this one i just simply do not need to explain... if you think i do, go watch this whole movie and then there ya go thats your answer...
GENDER
8. River Song (Doctor Who)
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aside from being the character that unlocked my unhealthy obsession with :) Main Character Death :) at the ripe ol' age of 8 YEARS (although Will Turner from POTC also helped on that front... Orlando Bloom my beloved) River's story was a stroke of absolute GENIUS from start to finish and i simply love how Alex Kingston played her...
"You don't expect a sunset to admire you back."
I just love the doomed ones, okay...
9. Satoru Gojo (Jujutsu Kaisen)
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look... theres *gojo girlies* uwu and then theres GOJO GIRLIES... i couldn't give 2 shits about how he's fan-serviced (tho im not complaining) but have you SEEN the amount of grief pumped into that man? he could explode in a fit of fucking insanity at literally any moment and take the whole goddamn world down with him bc what happened with suguru WASNT FAIR to him and satoru has more than enough power to go apeshit... but he DOESN'T... even after losing so many of his co-sorcerers... he still puts on a brave face to the end in order to protect the childhood of his students even tho his own youth was stolen from him during hidden inventory...
SEE? The DOOMED ones!
10. Levi Ackerman (Attack on Titan)
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i read the manga during my last year of uni and when i tell you i SOBBED at the end... yes ofc for obvious reasons, but mostly bc my little Levi loses EVERYTHING. He is the SOLE survivor of the veteran scouts. He's missing multiple fingers, an eye, and the ability to walk. He was the strongest (yowaimo) but wasn't even granted the mercy to die at the end of his narrative! Broke my fucking heart.
BONUS: Morph (Treasure Planet)
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he's a morph!!! nuff said <3
fin
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stoned-eren · 7 months
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self ship tag game <3
im bored so i made a little questionnaire for your self ships!!! i filled it out too bc why not hehe
1. insert a picture of you and your f/o (picrews, art, or just a picture of your f/o ^_^)
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2. do you remember how/when you started self shipping with your f/o?
one day i woke up in a cold sweat after a really intense dream with eren. ive never had a dream that realistic before lol it literally changed my life. i ended up not sleeping for the next two days doing nothing but reading and writing eren fanfiction hehe… that was in april of last year, and i still think about that dream to this day, i get some dreams with eren but nothing like the first one heuheeh
3. do you have a ship name?
sumren 👊 its canon btw
4. who gets a crush on who? is it mutual pining?
definitely mutual pining!! though eren has much more intense feelings before we get into a relationship :P i imagine he doesn’t know how to stop his feelings from spiraling so he falls HARD.
5. (if applicable) are they obvious with their feelings, or can they hide it well?
eren’s crush is painfully obvious. he’ll be all sweet and gentle with me but then be a complete asshole to someone asking a basic question. yet his crush is very subtle at the same time? for example, he’ll insist on sitting next to me or brush up against me but he’ll be very nonchalant about it. before we started dating this would stress me out so much xD
6. who confesses their feelings first?
its a stand off!!! neither one of us would admit to it, i think it would gradually develop into a relationship over time. but if anyone were to confess, i think i would imply it first and… just wait until eren pieces it together in his head. i’d tell him something like “you’d be a great boyfriend,” and then three days later he’d be like… “wait. do you like me???”
7. what are your star signs? are you two compatible?
i am a taurus, eren is an aries. though im not sure if we’re compatible bc multiple sources say yes and others say no lol… i will say for the sake of argument that we have a very… fiery relationship hehe
8. what’s something you would get as a nice casual gift for your f/o?
i headcanon eren to be really into music so a few albums for his record player would be an option! or a little dinosaur or fnaf plushie ^_^ i also headcanon that eren collects pokemon cards so i would get him some! hehe these are all headcanons on what i think eren would like
9. insert a random picture that reminds you of your f/o
hard to explain but this is eren ok-
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10. insert a song that reminds you of your f/o or your relationship with them
ik i said one but i couldn’t choose hehe…
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if you’d like to participate, you’ve been tagged!! the more the merrier :D id love to learn abt your self ship!
no pressure tags!! @erwinswings @wyvernslovecake @bita-bita @arlertwitch @averysmolbear @roseofdarknessblog
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nerice · 5 months
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holding out hands. do you want to talk about any oc couples you have. or polycules or situationships or anything of that ilk.
ask answer time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! at long last. linking my oc page at the top bc i will throw out some names w/ varying context :3
also prefacing this by saying that the ultimate oc ship of all time is qs (queenshipping) aka jumie/reina alas i talk abt them all the fkcin time so let's gearshift and do smth else for once ! let me introduce you 2
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[the polycule] tm. relationship for the ages, mostly bc it takes an age to reach its final form lol. details under the cut >>>
noah/garvith
dragon god x serpent deity in all their beastly glory (this is before noah acquires a human form) during the war, they spend most of their off-duty time curled into ridiculous shapes having deep talks abt nothing and everything. goes bad when garvith flees a crucial battle, leaving reina to die & noah swears 2 put him 2 death over this act of cowardice. garvith spends the next century in hiding until he meets avery nd takes refuge in her body; which is all good and well until noah runs into avery during an unrelated mission and can't keep his eyes off her for. some reason >:) enter:
noah(avery?)garvith, messy tag here!
avery is ur average angry teen caught up in the middle of the fallout of whatever fucking romance those two had going on. esp bc noah+garvith, now both in human bodies (noah's held together by duct tape nd garvith thru avery) ARE NOT IMMUNE TO PHYSICAL DESIRE AS IT TURNS OUT nd avery (aro) sits in the crossfire like????? What!! Is Going On when she starts blushing like a schoolgirl over noah lmfao. sorry prince. usually she nd garvith are amiable w/ their body sharing but garvith does sleepwalk pilot her a few times to steal kisses from noah who is victim 2 his bad vein of hypocrisy regarding duty vs. desire lol. all of this ends winningly ofc when he stabs avery/garvith mid-kiss. amazing, everybody was hurt in the process of making this joint. let's take a detour
devon
local wolf guy who has fuckall 2 do with anyones god business. simply falls in love at first bite (bitten) with avery, who has so many other problems at that point, including inheriting a thousand years worth of memories from garvith & going thru a little ego death bc she cannot cope with the grief of it all. might selfishly have kissed devon at one point in an attempt to be someone she's not which cements his crush & dooms them all to drag out this stupid little charade into another book, where we get to >
noah/devon
who start out on the worst terms (romantic rivals for avery/garvith. who is simply Done With It on both ends f) but in the little space of reefair where avery has dropped off the map completely, noah+devon end up living in the same house & get pretty buddy buddy. devon is the first person noah trusts with the secret that he is a god, and devon has a phd in being a whore instead of going 2 therapy so they have a good time, as we say on this main blog where content restrictions apply. :)
anwy let's bring this baby home. ive talked abt court of the dragon before but the tldr is; noah dukes it out with his vengeful other ex that until now ive omitted. which is a shame bc damia is my fav oc, but the endgame is this:
noah+damia end up in a dual body consciousness situation a la pandora hearts, with one body stuck at the bottom of the ocean in dead world space & the other able to move freely, with the two of them having 2 play real nicey with each other taking turns who controls which body. by then avery has sort of rejoined the polycule (when she's not out adventuring across verses w/ lucie) but in an all members present scenario u get:
the polycule [tm]
avery, more or less serpent at times, trading affection & bite marks w noah/devon except like. sometimes noah is damia and damia doesn't rly fuck with the polycule situation bc he hates everyone involved but also loves to fuck with the polycule bc he is a goddamn bastard. i don't know what's going on here either but it's extremely funny send tweet
((((((bonus. ask jumie how she feels about her son sometimes giving damia head by association LOL)))))))))9 revolutionary vectors of psychological dmg here
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verysickofthisshit · 1 year
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i am very Tired of people ignoring how severely traumatized vi is. like ok i get it jinx is a lot more noticeably Not Okay, but r we seriously going to look at jinx say “omg her childhood was so traumatic” when vi took the brunt of a lot of their traumatic experiences in her earlier childhood?? 
vi at like 10-12 led her little sister on a bridge that was on fire and filled with enforcers and dead bodies to go find their parents only to stumble across her mothers fucking corpse (some ppl think that she witnessed their deaths but idk). bc their parents were now dead vi immediately assumed a parental role which caused her to lose more of her already stolen childhood in an effort to protect jinx. 
she held a lot of responsibility for a teenager and was assigned leader/parent to her siblings. most of what she did was to help her family and community. ive seen some people say that she kind of imprinted onto vander when they first see him meaning she adopted the kind of personality he had then. shes brash and blunt and willing to take all different manners of pain to protect her family. i would bet that theres a sense of fear of losing them because she lost her parents. vi feels guilty for really anything because she feels that leadership and responsibility with all of her friends and family. 
so not only is she putting herself in physical danger to protect her family but she also torments herself if she fails or slips up. then in a desperate effort to save her father figure who raised her and taught her and saved her, she finds out her little sister accidentally just killed their entire adoptive family. so she lashes out in one of the few ways she knows how which is physically. is it okay?? fuck no. but understandable? yeah. she literally lost everything in the span of minutes. then she turns around and finds out that the reason for all of this is her little sister who came along even though she was told not to. 
so its a matter of loss of control and a loss of family and crushing guilt because she failed to protect them. i think something that really stands out too is how in ep 1 or 2 vander gives vi the whole leadership lecture “you say light a fire they show up with oil” which is essentially “you are responsible for the outcomes of your leadership decisions” the whole effort to save vander was coordinated by vi. this rescue mission ended with her and powder being the sole survivors of her family. 
then she’s thrown into prison at 14-17 until she is in her early or mid twenties. in stillwater she is physically and psychologically abused for six straight years. her sole outlet for all her guilt and grief is anger. so she builds a reputation for herself knowing there is no end of her sentence in sight and with the crushing fear that her little sister, who she hurt and abandoned (in her mind), is dead. she brutalizes other inmates and lands herself into solitary confinement often. 
then when she’s broken out she experiences a sort of culture shock with how much the lanes have changed, the shimmer problem worsening, and the way the last drop has gone from welcoming and gruff to barred off and threatening. she expresses herself in her go to coping mechanism which is beat the shit out of other people and getting the shit beat out of herself. she learns that her little sister is still alive but is working for silco. 
there HAS to be a level of betrayal and anger in that. i don’t believe it overrides her sheer relief and hope at the knowledge of her little sister being alive, but i believe its still very much there. silco cultivated the environment in which their family was slaughtered, took over their childhood home, and corrupted the undercity with swathes of shimmer. 
i looked away from my screen and stopped hyperfocusing uh.. im gonna finish this off the best i can but im stupid and i hear every noise now.
moving beyond into act 3 where do we even fucking start. okay, her sister shooting her?? terrifying. it is very hard for vi to understand just how much jinx has changed over the years. then believing to witness her death, you can see in the council scene just how apathetic she has become. 
the tea party scene and leadup i think are the scariest scenes in the show. jinx is clearly drugged out from her slow and borderline slurring voice. she puts vi in a very vulnerable situation that demands full trust from her, while she does get that in jinx’s eyes (from my opinion) vi hasn’t fully passed the test. vi is literally forced to choose between killing caitlyn (someone she has become very emotionally attached too) and leaving jinx (her little sister who she thought was dead for years). this is so traumatic i cannot believe ppl are glossing over this. my brain is loud and i cant think anymore but like... so tired of ppl not really paying attention and seeing how traumatized so many of the characters are and instead focusing so heavily on jinx. yes jinx is the heart of the show, yes she is incredible mental illness representation, yes she is a fantastic fucking character, but she is not the only one.
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spectrelove · 5 months
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soda lilies show at hotel vegas 11/26/2023
tonight was really cold, i love the cold seasons and usually feel the best this time of year but the chill got under my collar right down to my bones. i think this year i've lost more weight and maybe im getting crispy and vulnerable around the edges just from aging and it's getting a little more difficult to grin and bear the uncomfortable stuff. or maybe it's just cuz im not drunk and/or smoking, so the shock isn't dulled at all.
anyways it was easy to have a good time tonight. as i was saying in that last photo i posted, it's bizarre to be at hotel vegas. full moon. i've just been reflexively reflecting a lot these days. it's been a meaty handful of years with a lot of patchy memories, lots of new friends and maybe some adversaries, and now i think feeling a little more cemented in the scene or whatever it's easy to relax. or maybe it bums me out just a little bit that my hackles are down. whatever the feeling is, it's hard to pin down but it still softens my heart with the hidden blinding white light.
cold and calm. seeing a***'s band contextualized so much about him. this is the one he's been co-writing with his best friend and they really had their time in the sun a few years ago before taking an unintentional hiatus; tonight was their first show in 4 years. from my understanding thru cristian, a*** was a shoegaze boy first and foremost before this skramz (lol) stuff. i hadn't seen him so happy on stage, he wasn't containing his joy very well. i think also knowing how frustrating his other band, the one that pays the bills, has been going, it's so incredibly fulfilling to see what he does when he has agency with his music. i really couldnt take my eyes off of him. 3-piece tn as the lead guitarist bailed, but you couldn't even tell that something was missing. their new drummer is exactly what was needed. my first thought too after their first song was that they need to book more shows immediately. they already had a history and you could feel it a bit with the old fans who showed up -- even the guy who years ago drove up to austin from new orleans just for the show then drove back the next day. he was there. for me it was like joining a movie 2/3 of the way thru.
i am so in love with him. i wonder if i was being obvious about it. just having him near me made me feel like blushy soft static. it feels so natural easy and silly to be with each other and when i realized we were following each other around i was overwhelmed with how happy that made me. almost every torque i make in group conversations is aimed at making him laugh, and it's when he laughs when im just being myself is when the reward chemical in my brain surges. when he gets super stoned and then sticks his tongue out at me all playful when we catch glances. when he reaches out and holds my hand and responds to how hard i squeeze when i'm pulled under by a song. on stage he had the glow. i know that if i stood where i did and didn't know him i would be enamored, totally crushing, and probably think about him for days after. that's how i felt when i first met him but i was too scared to admit it to myself cuz i thought he was too good for me, that i didn't deserve it.
pale fade was so sick. im really fond of buckley and i don't know how this friendship started to crop up but im really happy it did. tonight just felt sweet and comfortable hanging out back with them and shooting the shit. just goobin. so when his band started playing i stood there sort of stunned. i knew what his music sounds like obvs, and ive been listening to the new album for the last couple of weeks almost every night on my drive home from work, but it was my first time seeing them and i was really impressed, and proud of him. he opened up to me over the last couple weeks and now that i know some of the context of his background it just grounded the intensity of the sound that much more. *what he told me in an edit.* there was one song that i need to find, when the lights dropped to red, and his guitarist ian shouted a crazy speech over the droning and then buckley ripped back in and it genuinely dragged me under, the fullbody shivers cascading again. i grounded with a***'s hand.
my conclusion is that they're going to be officially acknowledged by the sub-culture and sit amongst the greats as part of this revival. with portrayal, with ostraca, and with pale fade, the jeremy bolms and the chris and matt taylors are gonna welcome them in. it was something that just popped into my head intuitively after the first song. and buckley said that it was their first show in a month so it was rusty but tbh i couldn't tell. at one point driver's amp head totally blew just from how fucking loud they were playing, and tbh it was just like base level rock n roll hahaha. and buckley playing with that little bear hat on like a south park character. it was great. they're opening for touche amore soon.
stab was great too, just not my style of music at all, much more pop punk influenced. but the set sounded tight. cristian has more bass swagger and added some fun little flares that i really liked watching. dj seemed maybe distracted by something before and after they played. but overall i know they want to play more shows with soda lilies.
everyone unexpectedly got paid. the bartender who basically runs chess club was a longtime fan of soda lilies and knew a*** from his main band too. i carried both bass guitars back to a***'s car with ryan and buckley ran after us. ryan said he was actually a little pissed off at alexis just bc she was being mean at their last practice. hugged ryan goodbye and got in the car w buckley and a***, holding the chainmail hood that was in the backseat of the car, and i was overcome with that sweet satisfaction that happens when i have that bird's eye clarity breaking the 4th wall, that this is a moment i am going to look back on fondly, and that i love being in this moment, and that i am lucky to be in a car with the love of my life and my new friend and that the 3 of us are happy we are all together and things are easy.
happy full moon.
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ryeontop · 10 months
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My Aromantisim !
When I say that I’m aromantic people get confused. For example, when I told my best friend that I don’t feel romantic attraction, understood that some people don’t feel it but didn’t understand how I couldn’t. As I have had crushes in the past. So here’s my explanation for that. 
How Ive had crushes in the past
Ive had a few crushes in the past, or so I thought until I actually thought about it. My first so called crush was in junior infants. Now I think the answers obvious for this one but I’ll explain anyway. I was 5, 5 year olds don’t understand the concept of relationships. This crush lasted up until 2nd class apparently, although I can’t remember much. 
 My next crush was in 3rd class there was a small one at the start, now that I think about that one it was more admiration than anything. But this next crush is harder to explain. There is video evidence of me saying I thought the boy was “cute” I honestly bearly remember third class, I did send him a letter asking to “pretend to be boyfriend and girlfriend”. The principal was involved. The key word is pretend. Insinuating that I do not desire a committed relationship. Also, I was 8 years old 💀. I don’t think 8 year old me actually wanted to date him.
 Then, in fifth class I had another “crush”. This started in April when I was on call with my friends and they were talking about who they had crushes on. Realising I hadn’t had a crush in a while, I made up one on a boy in my class. Then forgot about it. In May I was sitting between my fake crush and another boy. That boy had accidentally taken a sip of an expired yogurt and said he felt weird. Me, being scared of vomit started scooting my chair over to the side, which so happened to my past crush. Here’s my recollection of the conversation that transpired:
Him: ‘uhh what are you doing?’
Me *having accidentally scooted my chair too near him*: ‘oh sorry, he *gesturing to the other boy* just drank an expired yogurt and is saying he feels weird and I am really scared of vomit so-‘
Him:  ‘oh no that’s totally ok you can stay over here’
Him *talking to the boy who just drank expired yogurt* ‘XXXX if you feel like you’re gonna vomit, go to the bathroom.’
I was really surprised that he didnt mock me for  my fear vomit. So,I thought I had a crush on him from then on.
Heres how I know I didn’t. Although did think I desired a relationship with that boy, in reality if I actually thought about it rationally I wouldn’t have wanted a relationship with him. I said all the things people normally say when they like someone, eg. “I wanna kiss him” “he’s so pretty”.
I did think those things but I know if he confessed to me I would have rejected him. I was gaslighting myself. My brain went into overdrive since I hadn’t had a crush in so long. It was so excited that I was finally doing something normal for once, being normal.  I invented a version of that boy in my head, I was obsessed with an ideology of this boy in my head. Now when they ask me, “what did you see in him?” I always say “he was pretty I guess and funny.” In truth we barely ever talked to each other, I just wanted to be close with a  boy who wasn’t my brother. I was excited that a boy was taking interest in me and talking to me. In short, he just wasn’t a giant prick 😭 
That was the boys, now for the three girls. 
  No.1 was my best friend, strong platonic love at the age of nine nothing more.
No.2 was a toxic friendship I had, it was unhealthy idolisation.
No.3 she confessed to me while I was at my house, I had to accept her confession or else it would’ve been awkward. I never actually saw her as more than a friend before that.
The signs
I identified with the term lesbian for a while because I had realised that I didn’t feel anything for boys. So, I deemed I must be a lesbian if I didn’t like boys. But, as I identified with that term, I started to feel I wasn’t an actual lesbian because I didn’t find any girls attractive. That made me feel shitty for alittle. 
 Another sign is one day when I was in sixth class I was looking around in my class room looking for a crush to have, BECAUSE I WAS BORED 😭 I WAS LITERALLY REVIEWING MY OPTIONS.😭
Conclusion
As you can see, I am very much aromantic.  Thank you if you read this mess all the way through. This was more for me to confirm my identity to myself more than anyone else. 
BYEEEEE -Rylie
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hikari-ni-naritai · 1 year
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primeeeeeenumb
ive made it home and watched some anime (literally only one show has come out since yesterday despite me watching like 18 of them) so i can finally work on these
2. Favorite color when you were younger, and now?
yellow when i was younger, now i think it'd be sky blue
3. Do you wear eye-shadow? What color?
nah makeup isnt my thing
5. In your opinion, is love at first sight real?
definitely not im wayyy way way too demi for that.
7. First kiss details? (If you haven’t been kissed, reply how and if you would like to be.)
if you mean my first actual kiss on the lips by any definition, it would be when i was like in middle school and i somehow blanked on how my grandma normally kissed me goodbye and my brain was like 'it was lips right? probably lips'. it was not lips.
my actual first kiss with someone outside of family was with my 2nd girlfriend (the one i was engaged to for several years) i stopped her in my parents garage on our way to my car and kissed her. this was notably like, what, several weeks after we started dating? i did not move very quickly.
11. What is your hair like?
dirty :( i need a shower. but it's brown, thin, slightly wavy, mid-back length? so many split ends. usually tied and over my shoulder like a dead anime mom. really need to get some kinda bangs situation going on so i dont look like shit when i do this but eh. the nurse said it was healthy.
13. What time do you go to bed? What time do you wake up?
usually around noon, and wake up around 7pm. but im diurnal for now so i dont know what my schedule will be.
17. Favorite game as a child?
hmm. when i was in boy scouts we would spend like 30 minutes of every weekly meeting playing Dark Hide & Seek in the church basement we were using. it was a really good location for it, the goal was at the end of a hallway so there was only one way to get there, and there were rooms branching off it, including an open kitchen with an island for circling maneuvers, and at the far end was a big open room with some other rooms inside. provided a lot of variety despite the ostensibly simple layout. mike broke his nose once. its still crooked. good times!
19. Princess, Fairy, Mermaid, or Unicorn?
like, what id like to be? of these, fairy. id like to fly and do magic.
23. Do you dance? Slow dance?
definitely not regular dance. i would slow dance with a girl if pressed and have before. but not any dances done like, For Fun. bc they are not fun for emily
29. When and who was your first crush?
the cute redhead from my class when i was in 8th grade. 2 days prior i had no interest in romance. the next day i was like 'hmm well theres a couple girls i would be ok with dating'. and then i woke up the next morning and spent the whole day in an impenetrable haze of rapidly mounting obsession as my parents drove me and my brother to the pro football hall of fame and back. and i was a complete lost cause for the next couple of years despite being rejected almost immediately. it was a saturday and i'd planned to keep it to myself, but by tuesday i'd confessed (in writing, because i have never in my life had the guts to do it verbally) and been summarily dismissed. ive never been good at handling emotions, it turns out.
31. Are you superstitious?
nah
37. Are you quiet or loud?
usually quiet. i can get carried away though
41. Worst fear as a kid?
bees probably
43. does not exist!
47. Do you feel everything, nothing, or you don’t know what to feel?
i feel some things!
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l832 · 1 year
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get to know better meme
all right well i was tagged by both @oldbookist and @lafcadiosadventures to do this, so:
1. three ships: hm i don't really consider myself to be that into 'shipping' these days. of course there's enjolras/combeferre my favorites. hm am weirdly fond of lesgle/grantaire in a sort of mikey and nicky way. and i also think jehan/bahorel is an interesting pairing!
2. last song: grand paradise by foxing. their best song fr. good band if you like atmospheric emo
3. last movie: i started watching the man who laughs (1928) but haven't had time to finish watching it. haven't yet read the novel so i can't speak about its adaptational merit, but cinematically it's a gem. crushing on conrad veidt atm.
4. currently reading: 1 henry iv. having real hotspur blorbo hours tbh. then, i'm also reading lost illusions in infrequent bursts. started it over new years while on a tedious road trip, tbh i had thought i could finish it by the end of january but i've only just recently finished part 1. that said, i'm really enjoying it and i am eating up the 1820s mens fashion porn om nom. bought it off of thriftbooks and all of the pages i've read have fallen out. which is a little ironic. i'm also also rereading les miserables keeping up with lm letters, and while i have been reading each chapter and really surprised at how much i enjoy the slow approach to reading this book, i have not really had much time to keep up with discussions like i originally wanted to.
5. currently watching: started rewatching succession (again) 😔
6. currently consuming: well for breakfast this morning i made an omelette with mushroom, and toast with almond butter apricot jam and herbs de provence.
7. currently craving: topo chico lime. more time in my day. sleep.
i would love to get to know any of my mutuals/followers more but i am going to be incredibly shy and not tag anyone. but i appreciate the tags! ok have a good day love and light <3
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chaoticspacefam · 1 year
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For the SWTOR NPC asks. What happened to Loyat and Cytharat in your canon?
From the [SWTOR NPC Headcanon Asks List]
thank you for the ask, as always! <3
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I’ll start with Cytharat since I definitely have more headcanons for him than Loyat atm! 
Based on him mentioning being Malgus’ apprentice and a very newly-appointed Lord, and also being way Pinker than the obviously-older Pureblood NPCs/the PC Pureblood skintone options, I’m assuming Cytharat is pretty Young for a Pureblood, so I figured him around about Ty’s age, maybe 10 years (~2 human years max age difference) younger if that
Vano and Kas are kind of working in tandem by the time the Makeb storyline comes around so they attend to the Makeb questline(s) together. 
Kas had one conversation with Cytharat and immediately went “Yep This Is My Apprentice Now If Malgus Wants Him Back He Can Come Fucking Fight Me” (Malgus was never brave and/or stupid enough to come fight her XD). Since they’re working together, Kas and Vano manage to split up so Vano saves Catha Niar and Kas manages to save Cytharat. Afterwards she offers him a spot on her crew and since its obvious to him that even if she might be A Little Weird, Kas obviously Cares unlike most of the other Sith so he accepts and ends up becoming part of Kas’s crew. 
While he’s hesitant at first about the idea of teaming up with Jedi/Republic personnel, he trusts Kas by that point so when she says they’re going with Lana and Marr to Yavin IV to help deal with the Revanites Cytharat just accepts it. When Kas is reunited with Rai after arriving there, Cytharat meets Ty and maybe (Definitely) gets a crush. They’re only together for a little while before the whole temporary alliance dissolves again and when Rai (and by extension Ty) refuses to go back to the Empire with them they part ways for a time
Cytharat misses Ty a lot more than he was expecting to and Kas Notices (™). She casually mentions that she has Ty’s holofrequency if he wants it and deliberately leaves said frequency where she Knows he can find it. Cytharat sneaks a few message/letters through and keeps chatting with him until Arcann and the Eternal Empire give them more pressing concerns at which point they lose contact again until one day Lana rocks up to Kas’s office with Rai and Ty in tow. 
Ty gets left with Kas and co. while Rai goes with Lana and Koth to Zakuul and the poor kid is a Nervous Wreck about it so Cytharat has to help Kas calm him down because they’re the only two people he Trusts. Kas then pulls a classic old “oh Cytharat do you think you could help us with this star chart, oh wait a second is that Ashara and Khem calling me? You and Ty can handle looking through this one by yourselves right? I’ll check on you later byeeee~” and at some point during their moving everything over to Odessen he ~finally~ asks Ty out. 
So of course Cytharat stays on with the Alliance afterwards. I’m not 100% sure if they’ll ever get married yet (haven’t gotten that far with their relationship planning yet but they’re defo solid as an item :’3) but Cytharat is absolutely okay with being the muscle of the relationship while his bf hides behind him when things get scary (which is, unfortunately, very often. Poor Ty XD) 
And Loyat!! (who I do not have any screenshots of rn since none of my current pub toons are as far as Ilum (anymore, I yeeted a few of them when I stopped vibing with them oopsie)
I have less solid plants for Loyat but I do love her and I am definitely kidnapping her she’s mine now Bioware /hj
Loyat and Aria are definitely buddies. Probably even drinking buddies, much to the abject horror of anyone who happens to cross paths with them when they’re out drinking XD
They absolutely would meet during the Ilum war/storyline. Though it’s not until after (the Assault on Tython FP) that Aria’s officially outed as a Sith plant, Loyat can probably Sense It so she agrees to go with Aria to the Jedi if only knowing that Aria probably has an Out Again if she’s managed to be in deep cover this long and not get caught.
It’s a minor wrench in the plan when Aria tries to fuckin fight Satele and gets arrested, but I’m kiiind of feeling like Loyat might go with her to Manaan. Especially since with Zenith and most of the other Consular crew lickity splitting when they realise Aria Was Sith The Whole Time. Ya girl’s gonna need some crewmates/friends, so why not Loyat? ;3 by the same vein, probably goes with Aria to the Alliance and ends up working under Kas’s Force Enclave sector, but where specifically I have yet to decide owo
I definitely want to expand on Loyat more, but for now sadly that’s all I got for Loyat! 😅😅
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