DID is so stigmatised.
I learnt just how stigmatised this disorder is when I accidentally switched (I think it was stress induced) in front of about 10 people.
when I got completely overwhelmed, I had a sudden, horrific headache and then found myself spaced out, so I assumed that I just got overwhelmed and zoned out for a bit.
I realised something was wrong when I looked around me to see everyone staring at me, their faces contorted with shock and horror. they looked shellshocked as they unblinkingly stared and stood, frozen. they were visibly terrified of me, and apart from the uttering of a few short sentences, there was an icy, hostile silence. after a few minutes of this, I became so unnerved by it that I left. I later went to see them again and when they noticed me walking closer to them, their faces once again became contorted with the same expression of complete and utter fear. one individual, petrified, positioned herself in front of the group and refused to let me walk any closer to them.
they agreed to not tell me I have DID (great friends/aquaintances, I know), and I figured it out by piecing this event, among others, together. a few of them afterwards made it very clear to me that they weren't friends with me. a few of them, looking back on it, were weirdly jealous of the attention I got from switching. I don't know why you'd want to be treated like a serial killer, but ok then. a couple of them acted infantilising towards me. one of them tried to positively trigger out a little, knowing that I couldn't consent to it (she knew I didn't know I had DID). she probably did this because she thought it would be 'interesting'.
they didn't react this way because of anything they'd read or researched about DID. not that they'd bother to do that anyway. they reacted this way because of the horror films they'd watched that depict us as unstable killers, like in Split, and because of the stereotype of the evil, murderous alter.
this is the effect of the portrayal of DID in the media. people are scared of us. they think we are dangers to society. when people see someone with visible DID, they first see a murderer, a dangerous person. they, second, if at all, see a trauma/abuse victim.
this pushes people with DID, who already may be disabled by their condition, into the margins of society. they can't be open about their disorder, or they risk discrimination. if, by accident, people find out they have it, they will most likely be treated badly because of it.
having DID is hard enough, we shouldn't have to deal with this stigma surrounding us.
horror films like Split and Glass have a real effect on systems, whether you see it in your everyday lives or not. I am living proof of that. don't try to pretend that the media doesn't influence people's perceptions of groups of people. it obviously does. please stop defending horror films about my disorder. please stop treating us like serial killers. it was horrible to be treated like that, and no system should have to go through that.
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Seeing the way controversial influencers and celebrities like Gabbie Hanna, who talk about their neurodivergence or mental illness does not give you the right to treat mentally ill, neurodivergent and disabled people like shit. And I want to talk about that.
I don’t know how to tell you but if you are using this as an opportunity to gatekeep and stigmatize the disabled community, then that’s just straight up ableist. No ifs and/or buts on this one. It’s just not okay to do this, to treat other disabled people with disrespect on the basis of their disability.
I’ve been seeing this happen a lot with influencers and creators who do bad things and are assholes, but are also open with the fact that they are mentally ill or disabled. It’s a problem, its an issue, stop doing it.
I know they spread misinformation, I know they can be ableist themselves, I know that they are wrong. But this doesn’t give you the right to dehumanize, harass, stigmatize and discriminate against other disabled people.
ADHD is already so stigmatized and so are many other disorders, stop fakeclaiming, stop with the true scotsman fallacy, stop treating other disabled people bad just because there’s one bad person that happens to be disabled, or neurodivergent, or mentally ill.
Please reblog this and please spread it. I can’t stand for this bullshit to happen, just because there’s one bad person out there doesn’t mean we are all bad. We are not a monolith, please treat people with respect regardless of their disability or identity, just as you would anyone else.
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I’ve had empathy all my life and empathy is not what made me a good person. I’ve always had very high empathy and yet I haven’t always been a good person.
I had to learn how to be a good person and it took a lot of work. It involved things like gaining the courage to be wrong and to take accountability. The courage to have uncomfortable but necessary conversations. Patience and grace not to immediately jump to conclusions or get angry. I had to learn how to be kind to myself because it was hard for me to be kind to others when I wasn’t kind to myself. I had to address my cognitive distortions, like my Black and White thinking, and learn to reframe them so I would see people in their fullness and not just in “good” or “bad” terms. I had to learn (and am still learning) how to feel safe again after trauma so I would be less hypersensitive to people’s actions and feel like everyone was unsafe. I had to unlearn unconscious bias and learn about how I may be perpetuating forms of social discrimination so I could try to stop unintentionally harming groups of people. And on and on. It took hard work to be a good person. It still does. Being a good person is an ongoing learning process that never really ends.
It doesn’t automatically come with empathy.
So to every ableist person who keeps coming down on people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Antisocial Personality Disorder for their lack of empathy-- you don’t actually seem to know what it takes to be a good person. Empathy and lack thereof do not affect your ability to be a good person.
I have hyper-empathy thanks to Borderline Personality Disorder, and it didn’t make me a better person. I chose to be a better person. And I choose it everyday. And when I fail, it’s definitely not because I lack empathy, because I unfortunately have that in spades.
Empathy does not equal a good person.
Lack of empathy does not equal a bad person.
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