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#still not done with this meme format!

timeladix · 1 year

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It had to be done people...

Yes these are (form left to right) Darman, Etain and Kal Skirata from the repcomm series

What have i become..

(don't know the artists, took the art from pinterest, if you know who painted these please let me know so i can tag them:)

Update: Etain and Dar fanart by Jen Richards. Kan Skirata fanart by krad-eelav.

#YES IN THE END KAL'BUIR SUPPORTS IT OF COURSE HE JUST WANTS HIS PRECIOUS DARMAN TO BE HAPPY #but STILL it is very fucking funny #to me at least #i really love this meme format lol #never IN MY LIFE have done something like this before tumblr has corrupted me..#anyways enjoy #am curious if anyone will actually interact with this #star wars #clone wars #star wars meme #repcomm #repcomm series #republic commando series #republic commando #kal skirata #darman skirata #etain tur mukan #mine

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athena-theunicorn · 4 months

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I saw a post abt this the other day but it's been eating me up inside so I gotta get it in writing. Plus it was in meme format when I saw it so I wanna make sure the gravity of this particular thing is out there somewhere bc I said so.

Annabeth was under the impression for most of her life that she had to earn love and respect from those around her. First from her father after he remarried, and she had to earn his attention back from his wife and kids. Then once she got to camp, she had to earn the admiration of the other campers, her siblings, Chiron and Mr. D, and basically everyone but Luke (because she earned his and Thalia's respect by simply surviving so long after running away). AND THEN she had to earn Athena's respect. That was the ultimate reward in her opinion, because that's kinda what I imagine they teach at camp: "You have to earn the respect of the gods to get them to look at you, let alone respect or, heaven forbid, love you." It's fucked up but its true. It's one of the first things Luke tells Percy upon his arrival. It's how you get claimed, earn a quest, and get all these things that Camp deems so important.

And then Annabeth meets Percy.

Percy, who, despite having his own traumas and tough road to hoe, still knows the feeling of an unconditionally loving home and person. He never had to earn Sally's love. She loved him despite him getting kicked out of school every year, despite him being stubborn and kinda an ass sometimes. She loved him despite his own view of himself. She shoved all that aside and loved her son because THATS HOW PARENTING WORKS.

And then you shove these two little kids together who've had wildly different backgrounds and I bet you'd get some interesting conversations (although they aren't shown a lot in the book or the show). Like Annabeth having to explain all the shit she's done to get her mother's attention and Percy being like "well damn."

And then he starts to notice that she applies this to other relationships too. She starts doing certain things that Percy notices as trying to gain his respect and it gets worse as they get closer and he finally has to be like "hey, you know I like you, right? like you don't have to prove yourself to me" and Annabeth has whiplash because she's never not had to earn love.

It just makes their relationship so much better to me.

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blumineck · 1 year

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How long do videos usually take, when it comes to filming and editing? Say, if you put out a 1 min tutorial on something, what would be the (gods I hate to use corporate language) turnaround time for it?

Also, what sort of hardware do you use for filming, and software for editing? I'm always curious about the backstage stuff of content creators.

Always love to watch your videos, you're definitely a bard :3

This is a great question! It varies a lot depending on the video, but in general for one of my 'fantasy tropes' videos, the breakdown is something like this:

- filming: ~2 hours (including setup, warmup, multiple takes, fluffing lines, waiting for the neighbour's dog to stop barking, etc.)

- editing: ~1-2 hours (at the end of filming I usually have around 25-30min footage. The first run of editing cuts the outtakes and fluff and takes it to around 5 minutes. Then there's another run or two to cut that down to around 2 minutes.)

I usually make 3 edits:

one clean without captions that I upload to tiktok so that I can use in-app captions, but I also keep a copy of this in case I need it later

one with built-in captions and text that I upload to instagram and here, so you get the captions without a tiktok watermark (unless I want to use sound from tiktok)

One for youtube because their shorts are max 1 minute so I have to cut a load of content and re-edit the captions. (I could post long form but their long stuff is landscape so I'd have to film everything twice!)

- Finally posting: ~30 minutes (titles, formatting, tags, thumbnails, keeping the app open until the upload finishes before starting the next one, etc.)

So in general it's about 4-5 hours for a final video that's around 2 minutes long. Sillier/ meme-ier stuff is more like 2 hours

- but the biggest variable is research/ training. For some videos I already have the information and skill and I just need to check some things, but for some I need to spend time looking up facts, and digging into history, and for others I then need to go away and practice a new skill, which is all hobby stuff that I love doing, but it's still time spent out of a limited budget!

(Which is why I'm starting to look at some more commercial options, patreon, agencies, etc. Because I'm trying to fit this on top of a day job, part time pole teaching, and family commitments, and some weeks it's... not easy)

I do almost all my filming on my phone (iphone... 11? Pro?- quite recent, bought sdcond hand), with one of those grippy arm tripod things, and a bluetooth microphone. Editing is done in an app called capcut, and finished off in various in-app editors for the social media apps.

Anyway, hope that's useful! Glad you like all this stuff! 😁

#behind the scenes #content creation #archery

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keepthisholykiss · 1 year

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The results from my Dracula Daily survey are in! Just like with my Hamlet survey in the past, these are the highlights of data that I found from the survey. Folks shared valuable insights that are soon to be shared with the purpose of advocating for further free education resources like these. The data in these graphics is not all the data received but that is because I never share 100% of results, only the interesting parts. This is also probably my final survey I will do like this unless there is desire for me to do more research, if you have a topic you’d like me to cover send me an ask! Otherwise I will be working on my child, my magnum opus, my future PhD dissertation.

Onto the post mortem thoughts and alt text which are both under the fold!

This survey was originally done with the purpose of a specific conference I was to attend and share my thoughts on accessible education with. However that conference was, ironically, incredibly inaccessible. I am a queer disabled scholar and I face a lot of challenges in academia so making my case for why educational resources like Dracula Daily should be promoted within academia is very important to me. Unfortunately my original plans for this research could not happen due to my having to pull out of the conference. Now this data is being shared with a new and much more accessible conference, so at least I can still have use it for its original purpose!

Also of note is that this survey, unlike work I have done in the past, received some really nasty responses. Specifically terfs (idk why they wrote gross stuff in my survey answers though) and people who wanted to belittle the way or the content of what I was researching. This is not okay. I want to reiterate that I am a queer, disabled scholar who has zero tolerance for some of the responses I received. Studying fandom is never fully free of this but I want to hold people accountable always for the way people are treated within a community. My studies of online community are basically done (because I am moving onto my PhD work which does not involve the same research) but if I come back to doing it I will be implementing other methods to avoid the way I was treated. Regardless of the bad eggs and struggles I have with most all of academia this was fun. I appreciate everyone who participated and thank you for the feedback. Please enjoy these results!

ALT TEXT:

Slide one: Dracula Daily survey results Slide two: About the survey - A survey was conducted to gather data from fans of Dracula Daily to gain insight on accessible education and fandom. The survey received 863 responses these are the data highlights. Slide three: Disclaimer - The data presented here is a summary of information and highlighted portions of responses. This is not all of the data and the entirety will never be released. Also some responses were omitted from final numbers due to abusive language entered into the survey toward the researcher. Slide four: Before Dracula Daily - 62% of respondents had not read Dracula before Dracula Daily. More than 50% of respondents answered that they had been avid readers at some point in their lives. Slide five: 85% of respondents noted that they had consumed other gothic or vampire media prior to Dracula Daily. Slide six: Finishing the story - 66% of respondents finished Dracula Daily. 15.7% plan to finish. Slide seven: 92% of respondents said Dracula Daily improved their understanding of Dracula and/or classic literature Slide eight: Stopping short - The majority of those who responded that they did not finish stopped reading sometime in October. The top reason for not finishing was: lack of motivation. Slide nine: Let’s Talk About It - 82% of respondents talked about Dracula Daily online, in person, or both. Over 50% cited memes as their favorite part of participating. Slide ten: One More Chapter - Many respondents indicated their desire to read more books in this format, the titles with the most interest were: Sherlock Holmes, Jane Austen, Phantom of the Opera, and Les Miserables

#dracula daily #dracula #academia #research #education #grad school #literature

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sgkophie · 8 months

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A Man's World - Now a Book <3 (Interested in a free copy?)

Hi! Wow, it has been WAY too long since I have been on Tumblr posting fics... and I miss it so much! A lot has happened since I've last been on, but I have a few fun updates.

"This Is A Man's World" is officially a book! (Launches October 6th!)

Man's World, my Carlos Sainz fanfic that I posted all last year, is now officially a book on kindle unlimited + kindle pre-sale (soft cover coming soon!)! I knew I loved the story so much that I wanted to post it somewhere, and finally my friends (and several of you!) convinced me to re-write the story with original content... and I finally did it.

So really this is a post to say two things...

THANK YOU. A million times over. All of your comments, likes and reblogs kept me going through some tough times last year – and I can't appreciate it enough. Your feedback and love of this story made my day over and over again, and words can't express how much I love this community. You guys just rock.

As a thank you from me... I would love to give you the new book! So, would you like an Advanced Reader Copy? I can't think of a better group of people to read the book, and I'd LOVE some feedback honestly! The bulk of the story is the same, but there's definitely a lot of fun updates. I've of course redone the names and teams, but the characters are the same... if not better <3

If you are interested in getting a copy, then send me a quick Tumblr message or an email @ [email protected] ! I'll happily email over a copy to you in kindle format or PDF, whatever you would like.

And if you're feeling wild enough to leave me a Goodreads or Amazon review (or a cheeky social post!), then this independent, indie author would eternally grateful!

A Man's World - Goodreads Link

If you have Kindle Unlimited, you can get the book for free HERE. (Pre-sale also available if interested!)

My Author Instagram -> Follow me for some fun Georgia/Luca (formerly Carlos... but still Carlos) memes, reels, videos+ my dog reviewing books. ;-)

----------

My second update is that now I am done Man's World (and that chapter is closed)... we can FINALLY get back to Lily's chapter. (And thank God caused I missed her.) Expect Hate To Love You Chapters to resume posting next week!

------------

@ihearttheoriginals @lightsoutseb @starxqt @zoobabystation @ashf1 @musialasbae @kashee-h @oyesmendes @hnmaga-blog @opfire @alina-starksov @localfreckle @gingerxarmy @bands-messed-me-up @troybolton-14 @she-shines-bright @xscorpioxmoon @whosays75 @j-brielmalfoy @ohthemisssery @felicitydameronren @alternativemadchen @starlightoctavia @monte-carlando @kodzuskook

@desperate-and-broken @xheera @panicforspec @guardians-ofthe-lastyoungkilljoy @writing-about-current-obsessions @m1glena @amulhermaisfelizdomundo @avalanchechick29 @layne-10 @c2-eh @dan3avacado @lovee-rosiieee @earfquak3 @formula1-bichyslut16 @finalkru @pukklv @c-tangerine @pulpfixion @speechlessxx @heavengirls111

@lhamilton-44 @vamoschilli @itsrogersstuff @messyblondsblog @thotalert4u @expcteverything @noeesd19 @booksarebae2000 @aedeluca @mpolarisblack @xaftertastex @pierregaslyyyyy @piceous21 @bbbruins15 @auawdo @startgirl36 @franx3sxa @a-certified-whore @jeanneblanche @alireads27 @hdbjdnsh9282 @teamspideyman

@pierre-gasllllllyyyyyy @groovy-slytherin @e456ertyptn-blog @dontforgetplusc @opfire @asmallhobbitruinedmylife @olafsfriend @khadijahisham @kidlnthedark @vendy021 @multifamdomfan12 @pleasantducktimetravel @xx-randomshit-xx17 @haunteddeputymugpersona @sugacoatedtoughcookie @hockeyunits @lwstuff @xeniarocks @lovingdennishauger @softiecaro @giuseppeyuki @0-0h0-0 @lecsainz55 @asmallhobbitruinedmylife @angstyturtlewitch @smoooothoperator @damonsalvawhore1 @irmpyrz @imnotcryingyouare1 @noncsi87 @lissimountf1 @stas-0 @miniminescapist @sgkophie-writes

Anything Tag list:

@ccloaned @canadian-girl87 @tita010 @idkiwantchocolatee @sava207 @organasith @elixiann @carlito55 @valureads @myescapefromthislife @burntrubber-dirtyair @loverboysainz @cubedkiwi @expcteverything @the-scarletbitch @hungryhungariann @vita-di-moda @ferrariital @valureads @enn-j @amerainne @thelightnessofthebeing @hewinsinmonza-16 @perriexed @bangtanxberm @eitak-t @perriexed @bangtanxberm @jpotterdilf @altheahuf @chiliwhore @dutifullyyoungdream @a-certified-whore @its-lilla-my-dudes @charles-dimple @forzaferraris @bradfordbantams @aedeluca @alternativemadchen @esserenorris @questionslostinmoments @writing-about-current-obsessions @downinroma @ferrarifwendvale @ancient-darling @hoodpankow @ccrobbs @sammy0908 @starxqt @ifancycharlesleclerc @lightsoutpierre @altheahuf @gogmf1 @ohthemisssery @raaaaabzzz @icecoldtires @iloveturbosa @dr3lover @ellethewitchbitch @sophierose463 @running-colourful @ricsaigaslec @rebelwrites @internetgremlin @internetgremlin-writes @mickcedesamgf1

Carlos Tag List -

@24joan @troochtvivel @glame

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hollytanaka · 9 months

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COD FIC WRITERS: DON'T SEND TRIGGERING, SEXUALLY VIOLENT CONTENT TO PEOPLE'S DMS JUST BECAUSE THEY DISLIKE YOUR WORK

when you send people unsolicited content depicting rape—do you fuckers ever consider that some of us have actually experienced sexual harassment, abuse, and assault?

On here, I speak out against my dislike for non-con fantasies or depictions of violent shit, like gang bangs, in fanfictions because those acts of violence have ruined so many women’s lives. And it disgusts me to see people treat rape as a plot device or literary tool, and nothing less.

Yet I have people sliding into my DMs taunting me with rape fanfictions that they write, without ever bothering to ask, “hm, maybe this person who dislikes depictions of rape is not comfortable with this triggering content? maybe it's something they have personal experience with?”

Just because a few days ago I said in a post that no authors were even tagged or mentioned in that I didn't understand why every masked man had to be portrayed as violent stalkers/rapists in our fanfic ecosystem, I had this happen to me.

Here's (@ns-imagines) a fanfic writer who writes for COD sending a rape/non-con fic of Nikto straight to my inbox in a taunting meme format.

Was this done out of joking benevolence and edgy lightheartedness? No. It was done knowing that women have so many valid reasons to feel uncomfortable with depictions of rape, knowing this, and still choosing to send triggering material to them out of spite.

We didn’t need proof that some of you fanfic writers don’t care about victims of sexual violence and assault, and will silence their voices so that your writing hobbies can continue in an echo chamber. But outright indiscriminately sending triggering material that depicts rape to people who said they didn’t like your work is some other level of fucked up.

The author who DMed me even invalidated how much I found rape disturbing by saying “well there’s worse rape fics on here” and saying that I’m too sensitive to be on tumblr. Imagine telling someone with any kind of past of sexual violence, that they’re too sensitive for the internet instead of considering why you’re taunting them in the first place. See below.

Many of y'all claim to be feminists and to care about hearing women and victims' voices, but the one moment someone dislikes your fictional romanticization of sexual violence toward women—you send her triggering material. It shows how immature but also how sick, cruel, hypocritcal and fucking pathetic you people are.

(credit to @collinnmckinley for the very suiting gif)

#call of duty #cod #simon ghost riley #cod nikto #nikto #John price #I’m tagging all of y’all #this fandom is disgusting #simon riley x reader #nikto x reader #john price x reader #könig x reader #cod discourse

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doyouknowthischaracter · 5 months

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Do you think the polls are inherently biased, because the well-known characters will be shared more wheras the unknown characters might never even reach their bubble where they are actually known by a lot of people?

Short answer is no.

Long answer is: well, if we want to be pedantic, an argument could be made that no method of collecting data via surveys, even self-administered surveys, is completely free of bias because that's just human nature and all you can do is minimize it by wording questions neutrally, trimming outliers, etc etc. With that out of the way, one very important thing to note here is that this isn't an opinion survey. The question being asked is very straightforward and the answer is not something that can be swayed or influenced by peer pressure, propaganda, unwillingness to disclose private information, or any other factors, be they internal or external. You either know a character or you don't. I mean, people could certainly lie, in either direction, but 1) why would you do that?? it's not even like we have winners or losers here, and 2) there's nothing I can do about it anyway.

Now, when it comes to sampling bias (which, from what I understand, is what you're actually asking about) my answer is still no, I don't think that's accurate. Popular characters will reach more people and get more votes overall precisely because they're more popular. If this were a tournament style blog or if I were asking your opinion on the character in question, then yes, I could definitely see how more well-known characters would be at an unfair advantage (or how tagging the polls with the character's name is encouraging that bias, as it's been suggested before), but this is not that! Well-known characters reaching their bubbles faster/more efficiently than obscure characters is an inherent part of being more popular. Everything is working as intended.

All that being said, there are a few factors which I think could influence results somewhat unfairly, but I wouldn't necessarily call them bias. They're more like limitations of the medium.

Firstly, the time and day of the week when a poll is published. I don't have access to this kind of data right now, but off the top of my head, I'd say Sundays around 10pm is when Tumblr users are most active. That, coupled with the fact that most users are from the United States, means that polls that come out of the queue on US Sundays during that time window have a chance to reach more people than all the others. However, this potential problem is organically circumvented by people going back to see previously posted polls, finding polls through reblogs or from tag searches, etc. So it's not really a significant difference. I haven't noticed the numbers reflecting this yet either, but in theory that's how social media works, so I thought it was worth pointing out.

Secondly, polls that were posted early on when the blog had fewer followers reached less people, on average, than polls being posted at the moment or that will be posted in the future. No argument there, that's just a fact. But, again, this is a limitation of the medium. Potentially, I could repost older polls at some point in the future and reassess characters' popularity, but how do I choose which ones? All of them? Wouldn't we just get stuck in a loop of reposting the same characters over and over then? That'd be no fun. So I don't really think there's anything to be done here, unfortunately.

Thirdly, meme-able characters will be see better engagement and consequently higher numbers of votes. Point in case, Obi-Wan Kenobi. Once again, not something that can be helped, not really. I do my best to maintain uniformity in how I format the polls and which pictures I choose (as high quality as I can find, cropped adequately, consistent size, etc.). But some characters will just have better chances of being shared around by virtue of featuring in memes or having some recognizable line or something like that.

To sum it up, overall I don't think there's an inherent bias in how the polls work at the moment. I do think there are certain factors that could marginally influence voting numbers, but not the votes themselves. (Which is why I've decided to compile two separate lists, by number of votes and by percentage-- they measure slightly different things, but that's a post for another day.) As long as every follower of this blog is delivered every poll to their dash and everyone pinky promises not to lie and screw up my numbers on purpose, then I'd say we're golden.

This is probably more than you asked for lol, but hopefully it all makes sense. And as always, feel free to share your opinion. I'm always happy to hear it!

#dyktc chatter #anonymous #asks #not a poll

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tawaifeddiediaz · 2 years

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HE’S A 10 BUT... + chimney han (pt 1)

(911 + he’s a 10 but...)

[Image ID: five large rectangular gifs of Chimney Han from multiple episodes of 9-1-1. Each gif is overlaid with text in the meme format, "He's a 10, but...". "He's a 10 but..." is in white text, with the meme below in bold purple-and-pink text. Underneath is a byline in parentheses, written in white capital letters.:

GIF 1: Chim dipping his celery stick straight into the jar of peanut butter as he watches the rest of the firehouse stave off their boredom in 2.01. The text reads, "He's a 10 but...he dips his celery straight into the peanut butter jar (double-dipping is not the one)."

GIF 2: Chim and Maddie looking at each other as Buck accuses them of dating in 2.08. They both look surprised as they quickly deny it, stating that they're just friends. The text reads, "He's a 10 but...he doesn't know when he's dating you (he makes honey mustard for everyone)."

GIF 3: Chim's head shooting up in panic as he realizes the crow now knows his name in 3.05, and whips his head around to see if the bird is still there. The text reads, "He's a 10 but...crows and their omens have it out for him (they know his name)."

GIF 4: Chim exaggeratingly flying a folded slip of paper through the air as he and Maddie try to pick baby names in 4.03. Maddie looks exasperated and done, and Chim's smiling widely as he unfolds the paper. The text reads, "He's a 10 but...he has terrible taste in baby names ("something modern, like chicago")."

GIF 5: Chim rushing through the firehouse loft to get to the firepole in 4.04, disappearing down it quickly to avoid spilling the beans about the secret Maddie confided in him about. The text reads, "He's a 10 but...he can't keep a secret to save his life (he will explode otherwise).”

/end ID]

#zee edits #chimney han #chim + he's a 10 but #911 + he's a 10 but #911edits #911edit #911onfox #911 on fox #911 fox #oneawkwardcookie #usernymika #userisha #userdahlias #tusercourty #laurenlook #novatracks #useralie #tusersunnystar

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alittledizzy · 7 months

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I absolutely agree with you on all points regarding the ask about Dan and Phil building an audience back, what's holding them back, etc. When they both started posting a little more regularly again after their coming out videos, and seemed to be hinting at trying to post content again, I was excited. However, I can't say I wasn't disappointed in Dystopia Daily. It's like Dan mentally cannot break free of 2016 internet humor, right down to even his snarking, depreciating humor about his audience being outdated. Phil has gotten much better about being himself on-camera, but you can tell he's still keeping it at arms-lengths. Which is fine, he's certainly entitled to create a healthy barrier, but watching the two of them in 2023 is like trying to straighten a slightly crooked picture but just not quite being able to get it right. Just...off. I think the tours were supposed to be their "grand finale" and now they just want to settle back into how things were before, but don't know how to do that without drawing from what they're comfortable with. Which they haven't done regularly since 2016, so that's their comfort zone. They want things to work within their comfort zone, but that might not happen.

"watching the two of them in 2023 is like trying to straighten a slightly crooked picture but just not quite being able to get it right"

this is the best description of them i've seen in recent history.

it's also something you can compare to other content creators that are still going; most have shifted content away from sit down stare at the camera videos into something softer and more blurred into their life. zoe and alfie vlog, louise vlogs, tyler streams on twitch. they're all still content creation but they've understood that the time for persona heavy youtube creating has come and gone.

i don't think dan and phil could, would, or should vlog. they wouldn't enjoy that. i don't even want phil to stop making sit down videos if he's that attached to the format! but they need to find what is their own middle ground between the rigid division of their pre-coming out selves and finding comfort with an audience. i think youtube for phil feels safe right now but i do not think it is on any level creative or challenging for him. i said something similar before, but watch even his 'questions i wouldn't normally answer' video and tell me he's pushing even a single boundary in it.

and if he is honestly happy with them having made their bank and likely being able to live on the interest from investments and residuals for the rest of their lives, more power to them. i'm here because i love them as people. i will never stop following them with passion and interest.

"I think the tours were supposed to be their "grand finale" and now they just want to settle back into how things were before"

i think this is correct and also where it gets even stickier because they are out of touch. with younger audiences and the content they want. with no video platforms and what does well there. i think they understand the audience they cultivated years ago very well, for better or worse, but that's not going to get them forward momentum.

i think a podcast would be a great way for them to safely do that. but i think their perception of how the audience would react to joint content is skewed too. phil gets numbers on meme tweets but nothing short of dan dropping an hour and a half 'here's a timeline of my relationship with phil' is going to pull ten million views so they've surpassed the era where they need to fear about making major headlines anywhere. they whethered that storm and i'm happy for them, i'm just not convinced they realize that. since obviously to a singular person any amount of direct attention is going to feel like a Lot.

#anon asks #phan asks

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actuallyastingray · 2 months

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Hello Supablr. Sorry this took forever, but I've been working on a follow up project once I'm done with these. More on that later, so for now just enjoy the takes

Skarra: Feral, cackling gremlin trying to pretend he's not empty inside. Needs a hug, possibly several hugs, but is too afraid of cooties to ask. He's either going to have a Prince Zuko level redemption or go full Anakin Skywalker

Dingaan: Dammit Dingaan! You can't be both the lovable, clueless himbo and dumb, jock bully at the same time. Pick one!

Automatic: So, if we ever get a Rookie Season 2, are we gonna see him become the third wheel in Skarra and Shakes' rivalry? Cause no joke, this guy lost his job to Shakes and has way more reason to hate him than Skarra does

Max Power: I'm not a shipper, but why are there no pairings between him and Shakes? I mean, technically there's two of him, but still

Dooma: Oh Dooma, Dooma, Dooma. The writers made such a big deal about bringing you back, and then they promptly forgot about you. Guess upstaging Skarra really isn't all that easy.

Uber: Somehow, a 6.5, 300+ lb. German muscle man is giving me more babygirl vibes then a Sailor Moon character. Also, it's hilarious when you realize he outranks his coach.

Ja Nein: The rarely seen lovechild between adorkableness and pure evil. The "first day at the unit" meme was invented for this guy specifically.

Thor: If he grows a beard, we can call him Odin

Von Eye: Why did it take me four seasons to realize his name is a pun? What is wrong with me?

Chuck: Seriously, I want to see this guy succeed. I want him train up his team, pull off a win, and feel good about it just so he can tell Toni to screw off

John Johnson: The most loveable himbo in a team that consists of equally loveable himbos

Miko Chen: The only thing not completely wholesome about him is how little screen time he gets. That's about as shameful as Ura-Giri's strategies.

De los Santos: He really needs his own Boss theme, but does that make him the bad guy? Cause lets face it, he's not the bad guy

Don Aldo: That's not how hair physics works

Ninja: The second most absent arch-rival in my history of watching cartoons. At least they both brought him back and gave him an identity as El Matador's rival. Still wish we got to see more of the tigers

Liquido: Ten years ago, if I told myself I would one day describe someone as a "sociopathic surfer-dude" I would start to question my own sanity

Andre Meda: His name is an astronomy pun, his team uses constellations as a secret formation code, and his coach has them train in outer space. This guy is a huge closet nerd, and you can't change my mind.

Vladmir Savich: They made a few half-baked attempts to make him a villain and the fanbase is having none of it. Good for him.

Riano: WHY IS THERE NOT MORE CONTENT OF HIM AND SHAKES BEING FRIENDS? They were such good friends, and we have like zero content to prove it. Do the writers not realize how much of a foil he could have been to Skarra? Riano and Shakes being best friends, and Skarra is feeling like he's been replaced, thus hating Shakes even more. Sorry for the long rant but c'mon Moonbug, this guy had so much potential

#supablr #personal take #supa strikas

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popcornforone · 8 months

Text

Professional

A Dieter Bravo Fan Fic

I for ages have been trying to write Dieter. One of my friends adores him as their favourite Pedro, & I keep toying with ideas & it’s never stuck, but today (8 August) for some reason it has & I’ve started writing him & I have spent the entire night writing him & loved every second. I think I’ve done him justice.

Synopsis:- Dieter has been nominated for another Oscar, & so is coming onto your critically acclaimed talk show ahead of the awards. The two of you just need to keep it professional.

Word count: 7800

Warnings: DO NOT READ IF YOH ARE UNDER 18. PIV mirror sex, mentions of drug & alcohol abuse, rehab, mentions of mental health & other illnesses & injuries including strokes, sex in a place of work, swearing, secret relationship,mentions of the mile high club.

Thank you all so much for reading this, I hope you’ve enjoyed this interview styled fic, all feed back is always welcome

“Lemons Laugh Longer than Leopards” you say into your microphone as you test it, walking into the room to do your interview. It always makes whoever the runner is with your coffee laugh, which then always makes you smile & then, because you are smiling, it will make whoever you are interviewing for the 30 minutes with series, automatically open up to you. This shouldn’t be a problem today though, todays guest you need to be professional & not be your true self.

The room is set up simply as usual. You usually make sure whoever you interview is offered a throw for their arm chair or cushion, but today with who you are talking to, you know exactly what they need. The two arm chairs & table set up as they usually would be. Black leather but not the kind that leaves marks or gets sweaty. One you can easily lean forward & make movements to show that you are in charge of the interview & that this is your talk show. You’ve come a very long way in no time at all. The pandemic suddenly saw your talk show viewership online increase dramatically. Your format always used to be remote before you started to make it big a few years ago, so you were all set up to just do it again, & then just send it to an editor & producer to adjust it, your much more professional that you were when you started, & your guests are now much more high profile & need less convincing then they used to, to spend 30minutes talking with you.

“Mr Bravo…” you stand up from your arm chair, as he walks in & extend your hand. He’s actually put an effort in today. So many times have you interviewed or seen this man just in his green Bath robe or in his sweatpants, his tummy hanging out. Too often have you seen the fall out from the nights of partying. But no today Dieter has a dark shirt on & some comfortable trousers. For him this is as smart as he will get for any interview. Only a red carpet or Oscar appearance will make him dress fancier.

“Long time no see” he cackles as he shakes your hand & you raise an eyebrow.

“Professional Dieter, remember…”

“Yes I know, I know, a lot of strings have been pulled yada yada, i get it I do, I’m trying to care & for once, I actually really am” that makes your smile even bigger as his make up is touched up & his own microphone is tested for volume. He’s trying to play this straight too. Your can tell by the look in his eyes as he removes his sun glasses to do the interview that this is him being genuine.

His hair is still wild which you can tell the people on your show aren’t happy about. You can hear them chatting in your ear piece that they will give your prompts for. But you & Dieter don’t want the internet to turn him into another meme. Baby chicken did make you both laugh previously but you want this to be an interview that will go down in history. That when people on youtube type in Dieter Bravo Oscar interview, in years to come, see yours as one of the top mentions, but for the right reasons.

“He’s here & has put effort in, knock it off” you whisper into your microphone, but you do it loudly enough that he can hear. You sit down in your chair & adjust your own outfit. Your tailored trousers & black jacket shine & gleam in their Prestine state, your silver heels look good with your black nail varnish on both your hands & feet. You’ve done that on purpose but no one except Dieter has noticed at all. Dieter has also noticed, that under that jacket there is no top, just a black lace bra.

“So much for keeping it professional” he mumbles under his breath as he sits in his chair. His mind now wondering slightly but then when he sees you casually smiling, he remembers he’s here to be interviewed, not look at how see through your lace is.

“Are you happy to start Dieter?” You ask as you tap your iPad on for your few notes, not that you need them, you know exactly what to ask the soon to be double Oscar winner. He gestures to the runner for a bottle of ice water which is brought over.

“Well maybe an extra hour in bed this morning would have been nice, but managers are managers & interviews have to happen” he smugly says as he checks himself out in the mirror to the side of him, making sure he’s happy.

“Did you look at roughly what I wanted to ask? I will deviate slightly, you know that, but it will stay towards what you were shown?”

“I know how your interviews go, we’ve done this a hundred times. it’s chill, I’m chilled you’re calm, we will have fun” Dieter winks & sits back in his chair. “Do your worst darling”

5,4… the count down starts in your ear ready to go & start interviewing the actor the world is desperate to hear from. You smile straight down the camera, take a deep breath saying in your mind it’s just Dieter & begin.

“Welcome to 30 minutes with… on this awards special we are talking to the current toast of Hollywood, the man who everyone wants to see on the big screen, the man who everybody has to talk to & get a selfie with. Oscar, Bafta & Emmy award winning actor Dieter Bravo. Dieter has been gracing our screens at home & at the cinema for over 20 years although he will still claim to only be 25. He claimed the lime light more in 2010 when he appeared in sci-fi thriller Beyond the Void, & has also stared in the movie The Letters & Flash Drive the HBO series. But he received global recognition for his supporting role in Your So Vein which won him countless accolades, including best supporting actor at the Oscar’s. Since then he has appeared in Cliff Beasts & now with his latest role in Isolations, he has once again picked up awards galore with the Oscar’s still to come in 5 weeks time” Dieter is very impressed with how professional you are reeling off all of his major achievements. Not once do you look down at your notes or an autocue, you do it professionally & in one take. He nods in admiration, which could be seen as him being proud of his own work but you catch a glimpse out of the corner of your eye that actually, those nods are all for you.

“Dieter, thank you so much for coming in to chat to us today for 30minutes, I know the world wants to speak to you but I just had to get in their first & you couldn’t really say no to an old friend could you?”

“The pleasure is all mine, I watch this show in my trailer on YouTube, me & you we go back to when you only used to have 5minutes with people” he chuckles. Dieter clearly has done his home work for the camera to show this is going to work, & be more than just the standard 30mins you get with other Hollywood big shots, & this makes you smile.

“Well you know more than most that I’ve come along way since then, much like you” you smile back, your trying to not let it show that you’ve known each other for longer than either of you care to remember, even before the 5minute videos, of crashing red carpets together. “So Dieter congratulations, another Oscar nomination, you already have a golden globe & a critics choice award for isolations, the BAFTAs are at the end of next week, how does it feel to get all this support & love for a role that’s gripped so many people?” You have to start with praise, you know that Dieter keeps things very close guarded in his life, both his troubled past & his private life. Buttering him up a bit might make him open up.

“Thank you, I know you’ve seen it, your not just saying that because you have to”, he starts off by shifting in his chair a little to get comfortable “getting the plaudits from your piers is always a nice thing. It always makes you so happy that you’re doing what you do. That it means something. But I do projects for me. I do it because it’s either something I’d like to watch myself, like Cliff Beasts, but I also want to do something that a challenge, you know. & sometimes the fans might be like the fuck has he made this or why is he a small part in that, but it’s just the way I flow, & I work. & when I find that grove I know if I’m putting in a good performance or not, & with Isolations it happened just as I hit the sweet spot in all the points in my life.” It’s a very honest answer from Dieter, probably one of the most honest answers anyone’s ever got from him & you on your little show have received it. Isolations might not just be changing Dieters life, it could be inadvertently about to change yours. Your producer however is moaning in your ear that Dieter swore, but you don’t care, they remind you to raise your hand slightly to tell them they may need to edit something for a of cleaner version.

“So are you saying that there are some performances you don’t give it all to?”

“Do you always give 100% every day?” He asks back accusingly.

“I always set out to Dieter”

“Well I always start to each project with that mind set. Some along the way you realise aren’t going to be your best piece of work, or you realise the story isn’t coming together, so then you just need to enjoy the experience. Have fun with the role.” You don’t press him he just follows on with “in 2015 I made a film called Above the Climb, it got slated, the lead in it Spencer Cable had to do so much damage control & took the flack from it. & we both sat there day 20 of filming going, this film is rubbish should we just have some fun & ad-lib some of this. The scene we did on the fly & the little side comments were deemed by everyone who saw it as the best parts of the film. We were proud that we made it enjoyable for others & we also got a kick out it” Dieter talking about Above the Climb in these terms is expected, but to be so honest about the process is so refreshing to hear an actor say that they don’t always have good days.

“I mean we can’t all be Tom Hanks can we & I can’t be Graham Norton” you joke & Dieter laughs. He’s always said you haven’t made in it life until you’ve got drunk on Nortons sofa for his Friday talk show, & he knows when this interview is done he will be hopping on a plane to do just that.

“Well you are my warm up for him.” Your banter & conversation is so organic. This is so natural to you both.

“That’s the best compliment any interviewee has ever given me” your smile is so genuine & so is his back to you. For all of 2 second you pause before realising you can’t stare into those deep brown eyes all day, & look at him twitch his pinkie ring. You’ve got questions to ask.

“You don’t like talking about your personal life anymore, but we all know you’ve had let’s say an interesting past…” you know your pushing the envelope here especially as he edges forward in his chair. Dieter has been known to walk out of interviews which go too far especially since the last Cliff Beasts film.”…in away did your past help you develop more of the character of Jackson in isolations? Was there any part that you thought could have been crossing between fiction & reality?” You’ve asked this in a clever way which he is impressed with. It’s not a oh how are you now off the drugs & the hundreds of crazy parties, you’ve asked it in a way where all he had to do is talk about the film.

“Jackson does embody some of my less desirable traits for sure. I had been off the coke since the end of the lock downs, the world saw my near death experience in the press. It was scary & I did after a while lock myself inside my head, my demons did try & take over, but it did take a lot of support & loyalty from the friends around me to get me through it. Those who really know me got me through & I listened to their stories of me & my trauma before I started filming. I got an insight as to what it was like to put up with me & that made me realise even more how much these people cared for me” Dieter isn’t showing off. So often in interviews Dieter is the show off, stealing the spot light. But here his vulnerability is showing. You want to portray him for the man he really is, be it the man with the ego & also the man who is behind the persona the world sees.

“Would you say there are people who you thought were there for you who then weren’t?” As you ask this you see Dieter raise an eyebrow. You have known Dieter for a while, you know the circles he frequents & those who have always used him for personal gain, claiming to be friends, clearly in it for themselves not caring who gets hurt along the way.

“A few, I know who they are, & I know they didn’t want their reputations tarnished, but now they all are sitting there not being interviewed by you” Dieter firmly says back. You know this is the end of this line of questioning based on his body language. You know which 3 people this is, & you gave him a chance to call them out. A more intimidating interviewer would press further for names & gossip, but you would like to keep the status quo with him so leave it there.

“No they aren’t, you are. & not only are you here but as an Oscar Nominee again, is there anything you are experiencing differently with a second nomination that to the first time” you face returns to a friendly one which he reciprocates.

“People take me more seriously this time on the consideration circuit”

“How so?” You look shocked at his answer. This is Dieter Bravo, a name the world wishes they could have even glimpse at their script or return their phone call.

“First time people thought I was there as like a reward for my hard work. That I didn’t deserve it.” You go to shake your head & interrupt but he stops you before your lips can even part. “You don’t have to pretend. I know you didn’t, but a lot of people thought I was there to make up the numbers & said my win was a legacy win. It was only before this film came out that those critics re assessed Your So Vein & went okay maybe he can act. I felt a bit more validated this time. It feels more just. I did deserve my other Oscar, I’d be lying if I didn’t say I would have been gutted if I’d lost, but I won. I’m a winner it’s what I do.” Confident Dieter is coming to the surface now. You know confident Dieter is a pleasure to talk to.

“You’ve always said Your So Vein was fun to work on even before you got your recognition for it, & you’ve already talked about having fun on set. Is there any film you’ve enjoyed working on the most or was there a particular actor or director that was more fun that you thought would be?” Dieter sips his iced water as you say this & his eyes light up, he likes questions like this. If he had a tail it would wag.

“I adored & had the most fun making Sunship the 6 part comedy tv show I made. I was killed off in episode 6 but it was so much fun & I love how it kept going on for another 4 seasons. But as far as movies Lyra Watson is hilarious. At no point did a days filming on Bookworm ever feel like work, we laughed so much, & you can really see that when you watch the film back. It’s not often you get to be a ditsy bank robber is it?” He starts to laugh at his own memories of filming Bookworm & then he winks at you. You actual had a cameo in that film as a writer who smacked him across the head with a book. Something that you should have been on set for 2hours for, took 7hours due to the fact you just both kept acting up.

“Well I’m gonna say nothing, I know what a blast that film was” you say. You’re trying not to laugh too & it’s the first time since you’ve started talking with Dieter that you look at your iPad to check where you are at & also to see how much time you have left. Plenty, you think to yourself & then continue.

“So when you look back on your career like we are today, is there a role you wished you’d done differently? Or is there anything that you think with the knowledge you have now, that you think actually…”

“Beyond the Void!” He answers straight away which shocks you , both in his actual quickness to answer & that he picked the thing that made him a well known actor.

“Really!?” You reply high pitched which he smiles at, before then repeating it calmly & more professionally for the recording.

“There is nothing wrong with my role or performance in Beyond the Void, but I wish I’d have been more prepared for how my life changed because of it. I was I naive & suddenly had all this fame & could do what I wanted. Everyone assumed I’d be fine.”

“So you’d want to warn your younger self?”

“Yes, I’d tell them to still act the same but I’d tell them no meth, no 4am orgys & no burger eating challenges. The life style & that level of fame was fun but it made me out to be much more of a party boy than I am” Dieter is being the most frank he’s ever been in an interview. Maybe it’s because it’s with you & the vibe you have together, but not even Norton would get this out of him. He’s giving you the goods & you aren’t even digging for them. You can hear the producers in your ear going his people won’t want this. But you know Dieter. If he’s said it he won’t want to redact things, he will want this in full to be broadcast to the world.

“That’s very honest of you Dieter, do you think due to this past, it allows you to be more honest now that you’re looking back”

“Can I just say thank you…” you raise an eyebrow “… you just said looking back & didn’t say mistakes. So many people say that I made bad mistakes that clouded my judgment, but I don’t regret it, I just wish I knew the effects of it even if it was like 5minutes before I took that drug or had to go have an std test. I would do it all again because it’s made me who I am & im happy where i am in my life. I like my slightly dangerous play boy reputations, hell I’ve got parts due to it, but I just wish I had a small warning. Mistakes mould us to make us better people.”

“Wow” you say out loud & it takes you a few seconds to register your reaction to Dieter revelation & you being a professional recover form it “so many people would sit there & say it was a mistake or say no I’d rewind the clock & change it, but for you to sit there after everything, especially your stroke, & say you would do it again, is almost inspiring. I’m not saying it’s okay to take drugs or have sex filled orgys…” your producers haven’t even told you to apologise for that but you know impressionable teenagers are a huge part of your audience especially on tiktok & Instagram “…but the fact that you are saying you have got through it & yes you can get hold of more help than others struggling with it, but it’s also easier for people in the public eye to relapse.” You pause. You take a deep breath & then share a personal moment between the two of you that the world doesn’t know, but will now.

“I was there the day of your stroke, I called the ambulance, I went with you to hospital, I sat there & watched you go through hell in your hospital bed & then in your detox afterwards. Everyone knows we know each other, & that we have known each other for years, long before we both gained the fame, we now both have. To see you in that state knowing my friend was struggling & was in danger, it was horrible. To see you now thriving, surviving, living, im not afraid to say that I am so happy each time I see you.” Dieter can hear the emotion in your voice. You’ve always told him how happy & proud you were of him now, but you’ve never gone into that much detail about it & you’ve just talked about it for the world to hear. He puts his hand on his chest showing his anxiety at what you’ve just said & you copy him. There’s a few moments of unspoken silence between the two of you, before you calmly & professionally continue your professional interview with your close friend. You will always be there for each other.

“You aren’t on twitter anymore, but you do promote self care a lot on Instagram. Because, like you have been in the last few minutes, been so honest about your struggles do you see yourself as a mental health advocate?”

“Not really” Dieters voice sounds a bit pitched, he was clearly moved by your supporting words a minute ago. “I just want people to look after themselves & realise it’s okay not to be okay & that if they want to talk people out there will listen & if they want help it’s okay to ask for it. But if they don’t, the world needs to understand people deal with it differently” he runs his hand through this untamed hair as he says this. Watching that large hand go through his locks always to this day always catches you off guard.

“Do you think talking about your own struggles helps?”

“Yes. I like to talk. I know I give off the bad party boy style, but talking even if it’s just going urgh my life or being honest that you’re not enjoying something is important. Sometime you just need to cut the bullshit out” you nod in agreement while waving your finger in the way of the editing booth. His swear words will need bleeping unfortunately despite you & your audience knowing exactly what he will be saying.The producer in your ear sounds happy that you picked that up this time.

“Do you see yourself as an Instagram influencer?”

“Ha” he cackles & you snigger too, you know he hates that phrase. You always pick on him for what he puts on there or mucking up his stories or taking a selfie that’s a video. “I hate that word. Influence haha. Freeloaders more like. Oh it’s all got to be on Instagram or it didn’t happen. I know I use it, but I do it for me for work not so I can get a contract or sponsorship. Everyone wants their 15minutes of fame but no one wants to work for it. Yes I am Privileged & so are you to be in our positions we have now. But we earned it. We did it the hard way & we made it. This new generation are easily disposable, the tiktok trendies with only a 30seconds attention span, that we have to condense an advert down to to get viewers for our show or movie. It’s pathetic. & fuck I sound old moaning at that” he sinks back into his chair after his rant. Dieters always talked about earning your place in the world, & you know he won’t get cancelled for this rant, it’s actually much more restraint than he could have been. You then both look at each other & start properly laughing. You can even hear production laughing in your ear.

You look at your tablet you’ve covered most of what you wanted to but it says you’ve got about 6minutes left before you need to tie off the interview, so you go a bit left field.

“Who’s going with you to the Oscar’s? A family member, a friend, a special person?” He raises an eyebrows because you both know the answer & you wanted to see if you could trip him up in his comfortable state.

“That remains to be decided” he says rubbing his hands together, eyes telling you to move on along with a few more things.

“Do you know what you’re wearing to the Oscar’s?”

“Well the bathrobe isn’t designer chic is it?” He cackles “I’m not wearing a standard tux, let’s put it that way.” You both seem to be enjoying these quick simple questions so you throw a few more in.

“Favourite character you wished you’d played & why?”

“Ferris Buller, iconic, feel good & fun”

“What’s your favourite film to put on to cry?”

“Up” Dieter is just going along with the rapid questions. You’ve not even asked, just both have a mutual understanding after all these years of how your show works. Long gone are the 3am podcasts on trying to make it in the industry or the 5minute YouTube shorts. But your format has always been honesty & Dieter has always been happy to share.

“Sweet or Salted popcorn?”

“Why?” He stops dead in his answer “why do you always have to ask this? It’s a deal breaker I know but I’m never answering not in front of the camera, all popcorn is delicious”

“Chicken” you giggle.

“Sorry?

“You heard me, baby chicken” he was once turned into a meme when he had his hair slicked back for an event, that he looked like a freshly hatched chick. It’s a good thing you know each other so well, as when your eyes meet you both fall apart in hysterics.

“& I thought you were gonna be professional” Dieter roars back slapping his leg as he bends over, tears almost falling from his face as you try to calm down to regain your composure to end the interview. “Ooh that takes me back to the food old days, when between us we had 20 fans & 16 of them were yours” he laughs before gathering himself again.

“Then maybe we should end with a question like back in the day Dieter.” You raise an eyebrow so he can work out what you’re about to ask him.

“Oooh a throw back yes please, bet you didn’t do this with DiCaprio.” His smirk shows that you both have each other in the palm of your hand. A smirk that gets all men & women into his bed, the smirk of seduction.

You mute your ear piece & face Dieter square on, as you can hear the Gallery panicking that this want pre planned. They have no idea how Dieter is going to react to whatever you know spontaneously ask.

“How about one last time we do a never have I ever…” you wink. “For those of you who haven’t followed my career, I used to end all my podcasts & interviews with a never have I ever questions which then I’d respond to & do my own, so for example Clare Blip has never watched a Harry Potter movie…”

“No way!” Dieter exhales

“Well she might have done now, it was 3 years ago, she had some lockdowns to do them in. Anyhow Dieter do you want to go first or should I?” You lean forward trying to guess what he’s going to say. You feel as excited as the first time you came up with the concept, it’s such a brilliant way of finding information out about other people. You were shocked no one had done this before.

“I’ll go first…” he says licking his lips & rubbing his hands he’s got a good one, he was always king of this when you used to play it on the episodes he came on. “Never have I ever…” he’s not lost his touch as he pauses for dramatic effect “… received a love letter or email”

“Awww Dieter really?”

“Yep not even a valentines card”

“Ooh that makes me feel sad.”You go to reach his hand but realise he’s a bit to far away. “Okay I have, I did last Valentine’s Day, it was really sweet, & I had no idea & im very lucky to have him in my life” you smile trying not to make eye contact as you think of your own one to say. “Okay my never have I ever is…I have never dated someone to get ahead in this world, I’ve only ever dated for love or a relationship”

“Really?” Dieter asks suspiciously, “what about” you shoot him a look “okay okay, your asking questions not me. Obviously I have, you know I have, the world knows I have, but that was me high on life can you blame me?”

“No, not really” you say sighing as your tablet hits the end of the silent timer.

“Dieter Bravo, today has been more than a pleasure for this episode of 30 minutes with, I know we’re friends & have known each other for longer than we both care to admit, but it’s just so easy talking with your professionally & personally, I hope you’ve had an enjoyable time on the show”

“I have thank you so much for having me on, for taking me seriously, but I do miss the 3am podcasts we used to do.” Dieter sits back in his chair as you do all the boring generic goodbye for your show & then you also record a couple of trailers & do a few quick photos together before you head back to your dressing room to get changed.

Your flight doesn’t leave for a couple of hours but you can’t wait to get out of your tailored trousers. There’s only so much your large Holdem in knickers can do, they do a bloody good job keeping your tummy flat but you can’t wait to put on a comfortable dress with leggins & be sitting in business class soon drinking a mimosa before your flight. The door clicks & you smile as you hear it shut. You know what’s coming next. Large hands come around your waist & start unbuttoning the jacket you are wearing.

“Was that good baby?” Dieter moans in your ear before he turns you around.

“You were very professional my sexy trash panda, not once did you let it slip that we’ve been in an exclusive relationship for the last 11 months” your hand goes into his beard, enjoying the prickles against your palm before your lips finally meet his. You have wanted to kiss him all day but know only a handful of people on set know your dating, let alone that the week after the Oscar’s you are marrying the world a most eligible Batchelor. His kisses are always so passionate even when they are small but todays feel like fire. The aren’t entirely forbidden but neither of you can hold back anymore.

“I doubt what I’m about todo is at all professional” his eyes pop wide when he sees how lacy your bra is under the jacket, almost see through. “Ooh baby, you practically had theses two on show for the world to see, but they belong to me, my hands & my mouth” he says as his shirt comes off & his trousers pool around his ankles. Your hand that’s not roaming his hair as you make out caresses Dieters own tummy, sinking your thumb into his belly button a few times to make him gasp. Soon his own hands have dealt with your trousers too.

“You did lock the door baby?” You pant as you start unhooking your bra.

“This isn’t my first back stage dalliance baby, you know that…”

“Yes because I walked in on you once when…”

“Yes I know, I know I … oooh baby” Dieters has a brain malfunction as your breasts are now free. His hands go straight to them. Your breasts aren’t small, but his hands are so large they eclipse them. While he does this, your own hands go inside his briefs, making sure he is ready for a few moments time. Taking his length & starting to enjoy how hard he gets.

“Ooh Dieter, my sexy lover, fuck me like you’re at a sex drunk orgy” you moan. Professional you all of 15mins ago would be lived at how quickly your begging for 2015s celebrity sex pest to take you in a place where other people could potential interrupt if they have the right key, but it’s not like this is a one off. Dieters been officially yours for almost a year, with no one else on the side for him. You’d been a friend with benefits over the years, if one of you broke up or needed pleasure, if the other was in the same country, you’d both try & get to each other, to satisfy each others desires. You’ve done this after about a year into knowing each other. This right now though is more than that. It is love & passion & desire, no-ones taking it away from either of you.

Baskets of hair & make up products slide off the dresser which he tries to catch in his eagerness to lay you down & start fucking you. You love his clumsy little nature & grab 2 products that you know cost a lot before reaching over the the chair to put them in before you ask him how he wants you.

“I think lie on your side if possible baby, that mirror is big. If I get you at the right angle I can watch you take my fat cock, watch it make you flutter, another memory for the lonely nights without you.” He says as he rolls your massive knickers down & his face gleams as he lowers you onto the dresser. “You know your Bridget Jones knickers are always a huge turn on baby, but I don’t actually care about your little rolls, you don’t care about mine, I love to embrace your body in every respect.” You got to say oh ahh to Dieter, but your mouth falls open doing an ooo noise when he removes his briefs. Your handy work has left his shaft leaking already. This is going to be so passionate you might break the dresser as he slides his way towards you once he is also perched on it.

He swipes his penis through your arousal.

“Dieter my love please, I want you my love, I need you, want to sit on the plane to London thinking about how good you feel.”

“Who says we’re not joining the mile high club?” He says his smile twitches.

“That’s creepy…” you start but then in unison you both then say “…but I like it” quoting one of his Cliff Beasts lines. He then silences you by thrusting deep inside you in one motion, filling you up so you take all of his penis. “Fuck me” you moan.

“I’m going to baby, god you always feel so good” he says as another firm thrust makes your body quiver, thighs already trembling. “Why did I ever share this pussy with so many other men for years?” This makes you moan. Dieter had never admitted he was jealous of other men you saw & dated when you had a casual relationship, but clearly today has made him really open. He starts to move which makes your pelvis & hips respond in pleasure, rolling for him.

“Look at you baby” you eyes are drawn To your mound which is experiencing pleasure, “ooh no baby, look in the mirror” the hand that was on your shoulder holds your chin so you can see the whole view. There are your reflections. You’re on your side, your hair already becoming disheveled as he moves back to holds your shoulder & grips your arse. His movements deliberate, his rhythm found, the pounding of your pussy has begun, watching it go inside you, as you love the feel he has as he drags your walls. You’re gripping to the end of the dresser by your head, your other hand moving to help keep you going to make sure you get off. You look at the state of the both of you & a small smile forms on your lips, especially when sweat drips from his untamed hair on to your body bellow. He’s going for it & you look so bloody sexy. “Does my girl now realise how sexy she is? Does she realise that your pussy is perfect for my penis? Do You enjoy the view? Should I go faster? Harder? Deeper?” The last word was said almost menacingly, it was deep & it make you clamp around him, which in turn makes him do all 3 of those things, as he exclaims “fucking love how tight you feel when I turn you on baby, why did I waste time with others, we were both fools”

“Dieter, fuck, yea that feels, oooooh yeaaaaa, don’t stop baby” looking at the two of your bodies getting sweaty & fucking the other until neither of you can function anymore is addictive. You know why Dieter wanted to take you here. This will not just be in his mind for a while but it will be in yours too. It’s his side profile that’s making you moan. His face is glistening, as the sweat pours from it. His well defined features looking so feral & full of desire as he starts to look at your body to make sure you are feeling all of it. the little oohs that escape his mouth each groan, his lips that are so plump parting as he pants. He might have been deemed a sex pest but it’s because of all those dalliances & late night orgies that you are getting the full experience. You are feeling all of him. Everyone else Dieter has ever slept with, means that you gets nights of unadulterated pleasure & lust.

“God you’re loving this, so responsive today baby, oooh fuck yes” he’s moaning throughout this sentence as you keep whining. You didn’t know your body could quiver like this & your added friction from your hand on your clit is making your grind faster. The stimulation is incredible & you can feel every motion.

“Dieter oh baby, you have me, have me, oh fuck just like that” your eyes have now left his face in the reflection. No longer watching his eyes go squid ink black, as his teeth snap almost as much as his body. Because that’s where your eyes are. On his thighs that are so thick, then & his hips generating all the thrusting power as he goes deeper inside you. He has trimmed but he’s not clean shaven, but he knows it makes his penis look longer, not that you need anymore, he’s the biggest you’ve ever had. There was more reasons as to why you always came back for more, but feeling how deep he went inside you, the only man to make your scream, finding the sweet spot that he hits multiple times each session without even trying, that definitely made sure you never said no to Dieter.

“Keep moaning baby” Dieter starts to pull your hair, which makes your body jolt & you gasp for air. You’re so turned on. You’re so feral. Your pelvis moving with your hips, clamping around him every few thrusts, gyrating for all of his desire. “I like it when you moan, it reminds me how needy you are for me.” He’s moaning too, loving how your body has started to shake. Both your climaxes building up. Watching your nipples get hard, looking at how well you take him. You really were made for each other & as the mirror starts to steam up from your panting & heat from your sweat builds up you both know you’re almost there.

“Oh fuck Dieter yea”

“You like this baby?”

“Yes”

“More mirror fucking going forward?”

“Oooh yesss”

“So tight, why you so good?”

“I’m yours, only yours”

“Remember that baby”

“Ooh fuck Dieter, I can’t control it”

“So wet, fuck, so good”

All these sentances in a quick exchange are panted out inbetween moans, he can’t go any faster & you have lost control of your body rotating your lower body anti clockwise. The build exquisite, the orgasm is going to hit tou hard, & it’s time for your body to give in. You bite your bottom lip & gasp as Dieter growls.

“Soak me darling. Make sure I’m yours”

“Fuck fuck fuck oh god yessssss” you gush & let go, eurphoria sweeping across you, clamping & covering his penis with yohr cum as you scream his name at the end of your extended deep moan. “Fuck baby yes yes oh fuck”

“Yea yea that feel so so, oh fuck” Dieters own praise of you going through your own high springs him into his own. Lashings of sperm fill your core, painting your insides, oozing into you. Your body slowly stops shaking as your intense pleasure slows down as he then also make his way down from a high he hasn’t experienced in year. Maybe the best random sex he’s ever had.

“Fuck me daring, that was another level” he eventually says once his heavy breathing has slowed down & he hops off the dresser & helps you sit up. His lips finding your for the first time in about 20minutes. Frenzied to start like your both getting out the last few bits of passion, but by the time you break apart & he tucks your hair away from your face, it’s sweet & a kiss not from a famous party boy but if a loving caring fiancé.

“I promise you DiCaprio didn’t get that service baby” you eventually say as you sigh & wrap your arms around him. Holding Dieter after sex has always been your thing, even when you were just fuck buddies & he’s never pushed you back ever.

“I mean I wouldn’t have been angry if he had. He’d be jealous he didn’t get you all the time…”

“I’m also to old for him” you snigger “what he gets…”

“Isn’t you darling. He can have all those models & wannabes, but he wishes he had someone like you baby. His loss my gain” Dieter says this while peppering your neck with kisses before slowly taking you off the dresser. “You were something else just then, I could have gone on for much longer, but I just couldn’t hold back, I needed to let go baby”

“I’m not complaining baby, my body shook in ways I forgot it could” you say as you walk over to the sink to clean yourself up. There’s no shower in this dressing room at the studio. You throw Dieter a cloth too. “I know it can’t always be like that baby, I think we were just in the mood.”

“Why can’t it?” Dieter asked as he finishes his own clean up & finds his clothes. “I want you to always have a fantastic orgasm baby, I want your body to move like that, & tremble each time we fuck”

“Is that a promise Dieter?” You say as you work out where your normal non interview clothes are & start to get dressed too.

“Well let’s get on this plane to London & see if the altitude makes you ever sexier baby” Dieter says.

“Dieter, I’m not sure if anything is going to match that ever, watching our reflections & getting lost in a moment was just so intoxicating” you say as you lick your lips & finish putting your clothes on.

“You liked it?”

“No” you wrap your arms around him “I loved it.”

“Good girl, my very good girl…” Dieter gets lost in your eyes seeing the genuine glimmer behind them that filling with more desire. His lips taste delicious as you both just can’t control yourself, as you both are showing such love & lust for each other. “Maybe we can get a later flight to London…” he raises an eyebrow.

“That’s not very professional baby” you say as your lips part before colliding passionately again.

“It may not be, but it wouldn’t be the best image if we break the on plane toilet from having too much sex would it?” The glint in his eyes as he clicks the door to unlock it, ready to walk you out of the studio complex to take you to more pleasure before you both hop on that flight. You both need this desire out of your system in the best way possible. An afternoon of hotel sex might just keep you both in check until your plane lands on the other side of the Atlantic.

#fanfic #my fics #smutt #pedro pascal #no minors #over18 #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal cinematic universe #pedro pascal fandom #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfiction #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo #dieter bravo fic #dieter bravo smut #dieter bravo fan fic #the bubble #cliff beasts 6

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weepylucifer · 5 months

Text

Just got done watching the entire new hbomberguy video and like,, yeaj

One thing i thought about that he only briefly touched on was, with this uncertain social status of youtubers as content creators, i am so sure that many youtube video essayists plagiarize bc they're truly convinced that that's just how the youtube format/platform... Works. When i was a kid who was discovering the internet, i remember, youtube was crawling with AMVs that were just... slideshows of uncredited fanart set to music. i don't think anyone asked for the art to be sourced back then, or even wondered if the artists knew their drawings were in AMVs. some platforms still work that way. Look at when we got all the reddit refugees here and their little r/169 or whatever tag was full of uncredited art and memes, like what they'd post on their subreddit, and they genuinely didn't know that this is Not Nice To Do Here. Genuinely i can see the mental leap to "why not also use other people's essays, articles and videos for my thing? After all, those are available for free on the internet!" Of course it all gets a lot trickier when youtubers want to graduate from "just nerdy amateurs goofing around in their free time for their 15 followers" to serious content creators who make money from their channels, while still freely using other people's creations, bc that is where the rammies come in

#hbomberguy #posts by me #when you larp as an academic convincingly enough you'll have to be expecting to be held to academic standards. i guess

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