#still so so so grateful charlie and louis started working together
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Charlie and the lad Tomlinson
#louis tomlinson#charlie lightening#still so so so grateful charlie and louis started working together#afh21 gif*
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Very Much Myself. Part 5a (NSFW)
Cowritten with @fairheads.
-x-
A few weeks had passed, Charlie had spoken to Baz and she had reluctantly agreed to his idea of a separation. Charlie thought that Duffy would have been pleased, but instead she seemed to be spending even more time with Andrew.
He was thankful that she'd called things off with Max. Well that's what Charlie presumed from the way Max now seemed to be sniffing around Tina which had caused a huge fight in the middle of reception between the consultant and Sean.
It had been over a week since they’d seen each other last. Charlie spotted her writing something on the board in admin so he sidled over to her. “Hey you!” He whispered, putting his hand on her back.
She jumped slightly. "Hi. You ok?"
“Yeah, just wondering if you fancied coming over later?” He whispered.
"I... Er..." She hesitated. Ever since Charlie had told her that he and Baz had separated she'd been anxious about spending too much time with him lest others get suspicious.
“Thought we could catch up? It’s been a little while.” He whispered tentatively.
"Um... OK. We could have something to eat?" She suggested.
He could tell she seemed less than keen and it worried him. “Sure, shall I book us a table somewhere?”
"Yeh, that would be nice." She smiled.
Charlie smiled at her, unconvinced of her enthusiasm. He didn’t have long to ponder as Tina arrived, announcing they were both needed in resus.
When it came time for them to meet at the restaurant Charlie was disappointed to find she wasn't there. The time crept on - ten, fifteen minutes passed beyond their agreed meeting time...
He’d gone in to save the table and was starting to feel a little embarrassed by repeatedly saying he was 'waiting for someone' and that she would 'be here in a minute.’ It got to thirty minutes and Charlie ordered himself a glass of wine, he’d felt bad about keeping the table.
Another ten minutes passed and he was about to give up and accept that he'd been stood up with he saw a flash of distinctive red hair by the door out the corner of his eye.
He watched her rush in, speaking to the maitre’d, as he offered to take her coat. She looked flushed.
"My car broke down again." She explained, embarrassed, as she arrived at the table. As she sat down it was clear from the way she rubbed her feet that she had walked quite a distance in the heeled shoes she wore.
His annoyance dissipated as soon as she sat down. “Oh no, are you okay? Where did you walk from?”
"I managed to get my car off the ring road before she totally gave up on me thankfully." She sighed.
“But that’s miles... Especially in those shoes!” Charlie couldn’t believe she’d walked all that way!
"Which is why I only just got here."
“Thank you,” He whispered. “Let me get you a drink!”
"Yes, I'm gasping!" She giggled.
“What can I tempt you with?” He asked her, smiling.
"Well seeing as I'm no longer driving myself home tonight a glass of wine would be lovely."
“Of course, I was thinking we could maybe share a taxi?” He suggested.
It was then that she realised he already had a half drunk glass of wine on the table. "Did you leave your car at home then?"
“I walked, just fancied the fresh air...”
"I forgot that you don't live too far from here now."
“Yeah, maybe I’ll stick to this one and then I’ll come and help sort your car?” He suggested.
"I think the only thing that you'll be able to do is tow it to the dump!"
He could sense her frustration and ordered two glasses of wine when the waiter came. “So how have you been?”
"I'm ok." She paused, playing absentmindedly with the rings on her fingers. "I... I've been meaning to apologise... That rambling message I left on your voicemail at New Year..."
“Why do you need to apologise..?”
"I had a fight with Andrew. After he stormed out I decided to finish the bottle of wine we'd just opened. I don't entirely remember what I said but I'm sorry." She paused. "And before you try and claim that I didn't call you and that you have no idea what I'm talking about I woke up on the floor the following morning with the phone in my hand and when I checked yours was the last dialed number."
“I got the message... It’s okay.” He reassured her, he had heard the message - a mixture of rage at Andrew and alcohol fuelled sadness that they couldn’t be together.
"Please tell me you deleted it." She blushed.
Charlie shook his head, “I might have it still...” He too looked embarrassed.
"But what if someone hears it..!" Duffy gasped.
Charlie laughed, “I’m not planning on playing it to anyone else Duffy!”
"If Baz finds out about it she'll tell Andrew!" Duffy fretted.
“Duffy, Baz and I are separated, that’s not going to happen.”
Duffy sighed and turned her attention to the menu. Several awkward moments passed. "Why did you leave her Charlie? We agreed..." She asked without looking up.
“I’m sorry, I just couldn’t do it anymore...” He sighed.
"What about Louis?"
“It’s hard but I’m still seeing him... Every other weekend.” Charlie looked heartbroken.
"I'm sorry." She reached across the table and squeezed his hand.
“I miss him.”
"Does she know you've been seeing someone else?"
He shook his head.
"That's something I suppose." She replied before placing her order as the waiter arrived with their wine.
“How are things with Andrew?”
"They're OK..." She shrugged.
“I thought maybe things were better... You didn’t seem to want to see me.”
"We were supposed to be making a real effort, not working late so much, spending more time together..." She sighed.
“And..?” Charlie swallowed hard, he wasn’t sure if he wanted to know the answer.
"Seems I was the only one who was actually trying." She sighed.
Charlie felt sorry for her, he could tell how much she had tried. “What did you try..?” He asked softly.
"I tried being the perfect wife, the perfect mother. I even considered quitting my job." She admitted.
“Oh Duffy...” He sighed.
"But there was clearly no point." She sighed.
“I take it Andrew didn’t appreciate your efforts? Or make his own in any case?”
"He barely noticed. I could have run naked through the house and he would have barely looked up from his books. When he's at home that is." She sighed.
Charlie looked up and raised his eyebrows, briefly imagining her running naked but regained composure. “Do you think he’s seeing that woman still?”
"I'm almost certain of it." She ran her hand through her hair. "I considered trying to catch them at it."
“Oh yeah? Do you know where she lives then? What stopped you?”
"No but I know she works with him."
“Do you think it would help if you found them out?”
"Maybe we'd all stop living a lie."
Charlie smiled at her, just as the waiter interrupted with their food.
She looked down at her food. She idlely pushed it around the plate with her fork.
Charlie had eaten half of his before he noticed she was struggling. “Not hungry?” He asked her.
"I thought I was." She sighed.
“Too much on your mind?”
"I'm sick of living a lie but too much of a coward to do anything about it."
“Someone we both know once told me that you will know what to do, when it’s time for you to know what to do. I think that’s true.”
Duffy chuckled darkly. "You're quoting Megan at me?!"
“She does know her stuff,” He grinned.
"A little too well at times." Duffy laughed.
Charlie smiled at her kindly. “You know she’s always right!” He teased.
"True... Don't tell her I said that!" Duffy giggled.
“Are you going to keep trying...?”
"Is there any point?" She sighed, taking a large gulp of her wine.
“You tell me..?” He finished his food.
"As far as Andrew is concerned all I'm there for is to keep house and raise the boys." She sighed.
“And what does he do for you and the boys?”
"He 'works hard and brings home the money' and expects us to be grateful to him for that." She replied bitterly.
“Hmm... Doesn't sound like he makes you or them particularly happy.”
"He doesn't seem to understand why I can't just be happy with being the perfect little consultant's wife. Why I feel the need to work when he says I don't need to. That I should stay at home for the boys."
“What does make you happy?” Charlie pondered.
"Helping people. Making a difference."
“You are a brilliant nurse, we’re lucky to have you!”
"When you invited me to come back to work he didn't speak to me for three whole days." She rolled her eyes.
Charlie shook his head. “But you love your job, does he not care about that?”
"He says it makes him look bad because it makes it seem like he can't 'keep' his wife in a befitting lifestyle."
“Do people even think like that?”
"I suppose its different for Baz being a female consultant." Duffy shrugged.
“I guess Andrew couldn’t imagine being with a woman who earned more than him...”
"I don't think that's ever going to be a problem for him."
“Who’s this woman? Is she a consultant too?”
"No, she's a nurse. She's over ten years younger than me."
“That must be hard to know...”
"Its not great no." She sighed.
“I’m sorry it’s ended up like this for you, you so deserve someone who values you, makes you feel attractive, supports you with work...”
"Someone like you?" She asked, a ghost of a smile on her lips.
“I didn’t mean it like that, but if you like...” He grinned.
"You do make me feel all those things."
“I do?”
She nodded, giving him a dazzling smile. "Maybe I should have married you rather than having you give me away."
“It might have made things a little less complicated...” He smiled back at her, finishing his wine.
She chuckled in response, finally starting to eat her meal.
Charlie was pleased to see her relaxed enough to eat some of her dinner.
"I'm sorry I've been so distant recently." She added between mouthfuls.
“I’m not going to lie, it’s so good to see you. I thought you’d worked things out with Andrew and that was why you didn’t want to see me. I missed you.” He explained honestly.
"That was what I was trying to do. I thought if I put some distance between us then it would remove temptation."
“Did it work?”
"I'm here aren't I?" She smirked.
“Ah but that could be because I kept pestering you... You thought if you came, then I might leave you in peace!?”
"I walked three miles in high heels tonight and you think I came here so you'd leave me in peace?" She snorted.
“It’s good to know you don’t want me to leave you in peace then.” He grinned.
"You wouldn't know what to do with yourself if I did!" She teased.
“Whose the one who just walked three miles to be here!” He teased back.
"I was raised to believe its rude to stand people up when they've invited you for dinner!" She giggled.
“Excuses excuses, you just couldn’t wait to see me!” He joked.
"You flatter yourself!"
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MEET NEIL ENGGIST
We recently interviewed Swiss-American painter Neil Enggist to talk about his life, work and how he is coping with self-isolation. Neil’s exhibition The Practice of the Wild was supposed to open at the Consulate General of Switzerland in New York last month as the 8th edition of Art@The Consulate but was postponed due to COVID-19.
Hi Neil, thank you for taking the time to talk to us. Where are you right now? It is my pleasure. I’m in New Jersey. I have a backyard studio near Princeton, in the old house where I grew up. I’m staying put as much as I can.
Tell us about yourself, where did you grow up? My mother is from Taiwan and my father was born and raised in Luzern, both coming for graduate studies in 1969 to Buffalo. I was born and raised in Princeton Junction in an old stone house near a small forest and the train station. My father was teaching in the Bronx and Connecticut, then trying his hand at importing Swiss Chocolate, but at some point in the 1970s, he turned to stained glass. I remember him cutting, wrapping, and soldering in the backyard. My mother worked for the state of NJ, and drew from the model in her spare time. I drew dinosaurs like a maniac, not very well I may add, but at some point around age 7, my father asked me to draw a dinosaur that he made into a stained glass panel. As a family we traveled to Luzern about every 2 years, and I still remember the smell of Birenwecken and lightning over the Vierwaldstättersee. I drew all the time but wasn’t precocious, as a youth, I was shy, quiet, hot tempered, diligent with school, perfectionist, and mostly played soccer and saxophone and you know, did my math homework.
When did you know you wanted to become an artist? I went to art school at Washington University in 2000, but it wasn’t until studying abroad in Florence in 02 that I had the feel of becoming an artist. There is a laminated portrait from first grade, age 6, where I put into writing that I wanted to be an ‘Artist.’ But in Florence my life felt like it shifted from art student to artist, 3 dear friends and I shared an apartment on Piazza Independenza, learning photography, printmaking, illustration, bookmaking, Italian and art history at a tiny art school called Santa Reparata. My future Love lived up the street and sometimes the cheap red wine would flow. Behind every door were Renaissance frescos, leaping off the walls were Donatellos, and it was the beginning of my explorations as a painter. I would paint plein-air small landscapes and cityscapes with oils, but by the end my ambition grew into a very large Kandinskyesque abstract rendition of Michelangelo’s Final Judgment fresco from the Sistine wall. A year later, back in St. Louis I declared painting as my major, and in the words of Joe Campbell, began ‘following my bliss.’
Neil Enggist, Sea on Earth, acrylic and stain on wood, 2011
How would you describe your style? Has it changed over the years? I would say it’s an Organic Abstract Expressionism, or Nature Action Painting. Over nearly 20 years, YES it has changed! Like a photon going from point A, painting the Ponte Vecchio, to B, dancing on a piece of steel with turmeric and ocean water, taking every single possible path! To say it’s moved linearly would be wrong, but there is a sequence of transformations or leaps, in the Ozarks, Mysticism, Heartbreak, Dylan, New Mexico, Traveling Europe, The Mir, snow painting, India, Brooklyn, Voice and Veil, Gardening, going cross county, yoga, India again, the dance, steel, the tides, The Tao and the Yellow Mountains, devotion. I’m very interested how Dylan’s work has transformed and shifted, beyond expectation, without calculation, yet somehow almost always in line with his poetic essence. My paintings have changed like dinosaurs and birds, from a common source, many branches, some seemingly from different worlds, some becoming bones and fossils, some soaring through the sky.
Tell us about your artistic practice, where do you paint, what inspires you? Well we can start with Highway 61.. music of the American vernacular, jazz, blues, country, rock, folk, hip hop.. from Louis Armstrong, Strange Fruit, Charlie Parker, to the early Bluesmen of the Mississippi Delta, Robert Johnson, folksingers like Woody Guthrie, onwards and outwards to Wutang and Nas. Basquiat inspires me. Ana Medieta, DeKooning, Paul Klee, David Hammons, Polke, Mel Chin, James Turrell, Richard Long, Kerry James, Doig, Ofili, Wangechi Mutu, John Akomfrah, Bonnard, Matisse, Puryear too. Gary Snyder's brilliant collection of essays 'The Practice of the Wild,' from where the title of the exhibition comes, has helped me attune to the wild systems at play in nature and within, and continues to evolve my way of thinking, seeing, and creative being. Taking a journey into nature, not just a dip into nature, but really feeling the connections, the web that runs through the forest and is woven into your own nature. The Redwoods, the Swiss Alps, the Coast of California.. I lose and become myself here. In my practice, nature is welcomed into the process of artistic creation. The imagined line between artistic intention and the creative functioning of wilderness is blurred, or more accurately, these spheres merge into a unified moment. It’s a spiritual practice, a kind of Taoist exercise, merging with the changes of the natural world, not holding, not fixing, listening to what the painting wants to become, and finding the color to enable the beholding. I paint outside and on the road, sometimes inside.. anywhere..
Neil Enggist, Odyssey III, acrylic, dye and turmeric on canvas, 2020
What role does Switzerland play in your life/art? My family has a house in Luzern, with a balcony opening to a view of Mount Pilatus that I would call perfect.. at least on the days where it’s not obscured by Nebel! Since 2012, I’ve been spending many springs / summers living there, in the bohemian remodeling of our chalet attic called the Macolette. I have painted and drawn our view of Pilatus so many times, it is ingrained in my mind’s eye. I’ve explored and hiked the mountains surrounding the Vierwaldstättersee, Grindelwald, Engadin, and Zermatt, finding places on and off the path to paint. When I am in the mountains, alone with my pack, in the quietude and breathtaking beauty, I feel something akin to being home, being one with myself, being on my true path. This feeling is fleeting and eternal. Also, during many of the summers, I have worked with my great friend and mentor, garden designer, Andre Ammann, constructing and maintaining gardens around Luzern. Working with him has taught me in so many ways, to notice the minute changes of spring, to work with contrasts of nature and culture, to understand placement of boulders and trees, how to create a riverscape, to dissolve into the consciousness of the river. When we are done with the work, all cleaned, raked, and hosed down, Andre and I look at our work, and he’ll say, ‘Now, the garden starts, try to see how this will look in 10 years, in 50 years..’ This has been a major influence in my own ‘Practice of the Wild’ and painting. It has also taught me how to shovel!
You have traveled all over the world, how has the nomad life shaped your art? As a traveler, painting becomes the act of experiencing and processing place; the painting becomes an archive of experience. Traveling serves to connect the painter with the uncomfortable and uncalculated, which forces a spontaneity and body-memory response. I aim to paint as one would do battle and dance and play jazz at once. In traveling, the painter becomes the abstraction, inhabiting transient and visionary territory. Materials from places of special significance, white gypsum sand from New Mexico, pigment from the Holi festival of India, black sand from Kanyakumari, gravel from Highway 61, layer into the topography, giving the painting a personal geographic context, while opening formal and textural possibilities. On the road, I explore the spiritual territory of color, and natural occurrences of unearthly blues.
With the COVID-19 pandemic, travel is no longer possible, in what ways has the pandemic shaped your practice / life? I just drove from California to NY in 5 days to install the Consulate show, just before the Covid situation hit the fan. I am supposed to be in India right now, doing a residency in the Himalayas! I’ve had a number of shows postponed and it just really doesn’t seem like people are buying many paintings right now.. But, really compared to people who are sick, caring for loved ones, and risking their lives to care for others, my sacrifices are minuscule. And I can most surely still paint! But I’m trying to use this time to do things I would have done in ‘normal’ times, but there are no normal times anymore. I’ve been making sculptures out of half rotten wood using an ax and a handsaw. I’ve been learning some Tai Chi from my Ma. I’ve started reading the Mahabharata. I’ve been texting whole a lot of hearts to California and writing love songs, and staying out of the bar..
Neil Enggist, That Great Mysterious Storm, acrylic, ink, oil and sand on canvas, 2010
What important lessons do you think we can learn from the impact of the pandemic? Well, first and foremost gratitude for life, health, and for the things that we used to take for granted. To be grateful for the people who are dear to us. This may sound cliché, but the pandemic has shown us how connected we are, for better and for worse. We are interdependent, and what affects one region affects the global community. I hope that people can stop and reassess their personal and collective relationship with the planet. In a profound and dire way, humans and our socio-economic systems have entered an unbalanced, virus-like relationship with this Earth. Humans seem to need wake up calls to affect changes, I hope this pandemic serves as a paradigm shift for enough of us. We are in this together. Yes when this is over, it will be great to go to a yoga class, an Indian restaurant, and to toast with friends, but we each need to use this time to reaffirm our commitments to each other and to all beings of this planet, and not go back to business as usual.
What advice do you have for people stuck at home? Can you recommend something to read, listen or watch? Well I’m a Liverpool fan, and we were just about to WIN the premier league, so I’ve had to go back and watch Liverpool highlights to cope. There’s a lovely interview with the legendary skipper Steven Gerrard in conversation with Gary Neville on youtube. I’m a very lazy television watcher, meaning I don’t really watch new things, so it’s The Sopranos, and very little else. Peaky Blinders is good, violent, but solid. Kurosawa’s ‘Dreams’ is a ravishing movie. I just saw ‘Purple Rain’ again, EPIC. When I drove across country I listened to Toni Morrison’s own reading of her novel ‘A Mercy,’ and it took my breath away, literally every sentence .. I don’t know how I even made it! She’s a true master in telling a harrowing story in pure poetry. Also reading ‘An Indigenous People’s History of the United States’ and Leonard Peltier’s ‘Prison Writings.’ Musically I needed a lil rock, so I went back to the Black Keys ‘Brothers’, Brittany Howard’s solo ‘Jaime’ is good, JS Ondara, Black Pumas, Valerie June’s ‘Love Told a Lie,’ AM!R’s ‘Parachute, ‘ and the syrupy ‘Cigarettes after Sex.’ I’ve been listening as well to Gann Brewer’s most recent ‘Absolution.’ I made the video for his ‘River Song.’ Tracy Chapman’s first album is incredible. Springsteen’s ‘The River’ is like his White Album and sometimes I need to hear the Boss sing ‘Heart and Soul’ over and over.. and hear that ‘Drive All Night’ sax solo by the late great Clarence Clemons. I am from Jersey, don’t forget. Listening to a lot of John Prine too, and with his recent passing, his music shines like a diamond ring. ‘Christmas in Prison’ is one of my favorites of many. Oh and Bob Dylan just released a 17 minute song about the assassination of JFK, and it’s .. indescribable.
Thank you Neil!
To find out more about Neil Enggist go to www.neilenggist.com, contact Neil at [email protected] and follow him @neilenggist
Scroll down for more information about the exhibition The Practice of the Wild which will open to the public as soon as it is safe to do so. Please note that all paintings depicted in this article are featured in the exhibition.
NEIL ENGGIST
THE PRACTICE OF THE WILD
8TH EDITION OF ART@THE CONSULATE
THE PRACTICE OF THE WILD by Swiss-American painter Neil Enggist is comprised of a series of abstract mixed media Nature Action Paintings, a method by which nature performs an integral part in the artistic process.
Neil Enggist, The Storm Ends, acrylic, ink, dye and sand on canvas, 2019
“My work seeks to embody the random precision through which life and spirit intersect. Within a liminal environment, I present set of conditions where the form can be born through an unfolding of natural currents. The nature of water, marks of evaporation, melting, freezing, burning, gravity, animal tracks, traces of dance, time, storms, tides and all manner of seasonal and emotional weather coincide to transform the canvas into a terrain in flux. Whether I am dripping ink into a melting tuft of snow, pouring the ocean on burning ink, or slashing the surface with a fallen pine branch, each action is composed within a system of nature. The result is a site of becoming where oceanic, emotive, and mystical stories interplay”
Raised in Princeton, New Jersey, Neil Enggist studied fine arts at Washington University in St. Louis and Santa Reparata in Florence. He earned his MFA at San Francisco Art Institute in 2016 where he made paintings on steel in the tidal zones of the Bay Area, searching for a language between art and nature, incorporating ideas of performance and sculpture imbedded in the earth art movement. Enggist has participated in a number of art residencies including the Lucid Art Foundation in Point Reyes, CA, and most recently journeyed to the land of his grandmother to paint the City of Shanghai and the Yellow Mountains of China. Through his extensive travels in Europe, the Americas, and Asia he developed a body of painting and poetry shown in New York, Milan, Mumbai, Luzern, and Paris. Enggist lives and works between New York and Luzern, Switzerland.
Neil Enggist, The Schreckhorn, acrylic, ink, pigment and oil on canvas, 2007
THE PRACTICE OF THE WILD is the eighth edition of Art @ The Consulate, a curatorial initiative by the Consulate General of Switzerland in New York to showcase the work of Swiss artists living in the United States. Follow Art @ The Consulate on Social media #SwissArtNYC
Neil Enggist, A Candle Burns at Night, Acrylic and ink on canvas, 2008
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Antique Champagne - Chapter 30 - Family Ties
It took a few days, but people stopped giving her sideways glances. Payne quickly fell back into a steady routine of working followed by unwinding at The Third Rail while listening to Magnolia sing. It felt more comfortable than it had before; easy, even.
One late afternoon, she entered the Old State House and found Fahrenheit sitting in a chair cleaning her gun.
“Roof.” It was more of a grunt than a word.
Payne nodded and headed up. Fahr had barely spoken to her since her freak-out. She made a mental note to try to smooth things out with Fahr when she could find the time. Having a reputation could be useful, but she had to work together with Fahrenheit to keep Hancock out of trouble. If communication broke down between the two of them, it could be dangerous.
Sure enough, Payne found Hancock on top of the roof reclining against the wall of the stately cupola, watching the sky.
“This a private party?” she asked. She tapped the bottle of Day Tripper on the railing. “I see you’re swinging for the fences today.”
“Mmmm…” Hancock slowly turned to her, lost in a drug-induced cloud. “Now I know I must be dreaming…”
Payne paused. “Your normal Jet and Mentats cocktail not enough?”
“The latest shipment of Jet was weak as fuck.” He rubbed his temples. “It’s gone off… or something. It’s a rough and dirty ride.”
Payne nodded. The more powerful narcotic was to smooth out the rough bumps of a bad trip. “You haven’t given any of that bad Jet out, have you?” She knew his habit of sampling new shipments before distribution around Goodneighbor.
“Don’t worry, Fehr’s already rejected ’em. Threw the trader out on his ass for good measure, too.” He slowly raised himself to a sitting position, reaching up to the bottle. Payne moved it out of his grasp. Hancock scowled. “What gives? I’ll be fine.”
“I’m not carrying your skinny passed out ass down all those stairs.” She slipped the bottle into a pocket. “Wait a little while, until you’re back inside at least.”
Hancock threw his arms up in defeat. “Bah!” Propping himself back up on the wall, he looked out at the sky.
“Is Fred going to be able to keep up until you find someone else to supply the masses?”
“Maybe for a little while, but that would require him to focus and not take half the chems himself once he’s finished cookin’ em.”
Payne snorted. That was true enough.
“I’ll just have to share some of my personal stock until something comes through.” Hancock patted the spot next to him.
Payne sat down. A comfortable silence settled between them as they watched the sun near the horizon.
Eventually, Hancock let out a sigh. “I gotta tell ya, I’ve been thinking a bit about you.” Payne craned her head slightly. “Well, more about your family situation.”
Payne cocked an eyebrow. Payne wasn’t quite sure what he was getting at.
“Uhhh, it’s just that… even after everything you’ve been through, given the chance, you wanted to see them again. You miss them.” His head bent down as he now looked absently at his boots. “I really can’t say the same.”
Payne should have expected something like this. The last time Hancock decided to dip into his Day Tripper stash, he got pretty philosophical. She made herself comfortable. At least once the sun set, she would be able to take her helmet off.
Hancock grimaced. “If I had that tight-ass brother of mine in front of me right now, I would probably just sock him right in his smug face.”
“Jeez, don’t hold back,” Payne teased. The disdain Hancock had for his sibling was palpable.
“He wasn’t always such a prick. We grew up in a shack down by the waterfront with just our mom. Dad ran off when we were still little. Mom did her best with the two of us, pretty normal shit, ya know? He’d do regular big brother stuff, we’d rough each other up, play pranks. Crap like that. Once mom kicked it, we took what we could and moved to Diamond City.” Hancock pulled a cigarette out from a pocket and lit it, taking a long drag. As he talked, tendrils of smoke drifted from his open sinuses. “Somehow, slowly, he changed. Changed from a jerk of a big brother to something completely unrecognizable. Someone who would do anything to gain power over people. Even stoking hate and paranoia just to gain votes to win an election.”
“Wait a minute…” Payne stopped him. Votes? “Your brother is Mayor McDonough?” Hancock nodded as she digested the new information. “Guess politics runs in the family.”
“We are nothing alike. Don’t lump me together with that pile of brahmin shit. That guy doesn’t deserve the title of Mayor.” Hancock spat sourly. The reddish light from the setting sun made him look severe, deepening the shadows of his uneven skin. “All he does is serve himself, not the people.”
“You know I didn’t mean it like that,” spat back Payne.
Hancock released a sigh. “I know. The guy just gets under my skin. I didn’t become mayor for some kind of personal power trip. By the people, for the people. Those aren’t just words to me, ya feel me?” Payne nodded. She knew he lived those words; she had seen it herself. “And to think that guy is my brother… family and blood…”
Payne really wished she could take off her helmet as she spoke up. “No one is ever going to think you are anything like your brother, trust me on that one… but listen to me. Family isn’t just about blood. Yeah, my family was pretty good, give or take a few details. But I grew up knowing how little that connection meant to some people…”
She took a quick moment to organize her thoughts. Hancock turned to listen.
“Before the war… well, things were different. People were expected to act, dress, behave a certain way… and only that way. Everyone was taught that you grow up, serve in the military, hate commies, get married and pop out a couple of kids. If you were different… if you loved the wrong person, if you looked different, wanted different things out of life… people would turn on you. Viciously sometimes. You’d lose friends, your job. People could end up dead over it. A lot of folks hid their true selves just to survive. My mom’s ranch was full of people who had been kicked out of their homes and had no contact with their families. They were deemed untouchable. But at the ranch, they formed new families. Stronger families, with deeper connections than they had ever had with someone they shared blood with.” She put a hand on his arm and gave a gentle squeeze. “Blood isn’t everything. Sometimes found families are better.”
Payne could see Hancock mulling over her words.
“No wonder you like it in Goodneighbor so much,” he finally said, the last ruddy beams of the dying sunset leaving his face.
Payne chuckled to herself. “I guess so.”
After a few moments, Hancock rose to his feet. “I feel like a walk. Mixing it up with my constituents, as it were.”
Payne knew what that meant… getting plastered at the bar. “Sure thing, boss.” At least it would be easier to distract him from taking more Day Tripper.
As they headed through the Old State House on their way to the Third Rail, Hancock filled his pockets with more chems. He was a veritable pill-popping Santa Claus to the citizens of the town, and he seemed ready to ensure he was propagating that sentiment tonight.
Hancock greeted the bouncer at the top of the stairs with a toothy grin. “Ham, my man! How’s it hanging?!”
A curt Sir was all the regard he gave the Mayor. Payne shared a slight head nod with Ham as she passed.
Down in the old subway station, Hancock fluttered around to packed tables and couches while handing out his addictive gifts to grateful patrons. Eventually he made his way to the bar, Payne trailing behind him.
Whitechapel Charlie whizzed to greet his employer. “Evening, Mayor. What’s your poison tonight?”
“I’m in a generous mood, Chuck.” He pounded on the bar for emphasis. “Next round for everyone is on me!”
A congenial cheer erupted from the evening’s crowd.
Hancock pointed to the wet bar. “A Gwinnett Stout for me.”
“Anything for you?” Charlies metallic orbs settled on Payne.
She shook her head. “I’m on the clock.”
That got her a jab in the ribs. “Live a little!” Hancock chided, his black dilated eyes dancing. His Cheshire grin and easy demeanor was contagious.
Rolling her eyes, Payne ordered a shot of whiskey to sip. Hancock was soon drawn away by a steady flow of acquaintances and drifters wanting to bend the ear of the charismatic mayor.
Payne relaxed a little, enjoying the radio while watching the crowd. A news report came on, commenting on new sightings of the Silver Shroud and his exploits squashing some band of raiders or something. It sounded like Nate was back from the Glowing Sea and up to some good deeds. Good for him. Kent would love that.
Payne noticed Magnolia at the end of the bar rummaging through a box. Curious, Payne took up a seat next to her.
“Whatcha got there?” she asked. Peering inside, Payne could start to see a small collection of records and holotapes.
“Daisy apparently found these in an old locked trunk that she bought off a trader. She had no idea what was inside. Once she popped the lock, she realized she had nothing to play them on.”
Payne smiled. “And that’s where you come in, right?”
“Something like that,” mused Magnolia, moving a stray lock of hair back in place.
Payne saw the flash of a peeling green label on a dusty record. Reaching in, she carefully extracted it, catching the crumbling paper as it sloughed off in her hands. Her breath caught in her throat as she read the faded white words under the bold script:
Capitol.
THE WILDEST – LOUIS PRIMA
Magnolia looked over and saw Payne’s bewildered expression. “You recognize something, hun?”
Payne couldn’t contain a small smile. “Oh yeah… you got a record player around?”
“Of course!” She fished around behind the bar before placing a ramshackle turntable in front of Payne.
“If I remember right, it’s the first track… cross your fingers…” Payne mumbled to herself. She tentatively placed the needle down on the spinning record a few times before catching the right groove. Payne missed Magnolia turning the radio off as her complete attention drew to the recording, listening for the first bars of the piano. Many of the bar patrons stopped their conversations, craning their ears closer to get a listen. The chance to hear ‘new’ music was a rare treat.
The piano joyfully sprang into existence. Payne’s shoulders took tiny bounces along with the jaunty rhythm involuntarily, her eyes closed. Happy memories flooded back in those familiar bars. As the lyrics started, Payne couldn’t help but sing along.
I'm just a gigolo and everywhere I go
People know the part I'm playing
There was no stopping it now. The infectious song ate away at Payne inhibitions. Too many times has she belted this song out in the green room back at her mother’s ranch, hamming it up with friends and family before and after rehearsals. This was their song!
Her eyes popped open, a smile stretched across her face from ear to ear. She stole a knowing glance at her fellow performer… a look that screamed, “Let the show begin!”
Paid for every dance, selling each romance
Payne palled up next to Magnolia, who started to snicker.
Ooh, and they're sayin'
Payne’s arms shot out to her sides. She held her fingers wide, pumping her shoulders while she shook her hands. She looked like some old vaudeville entertainer, drawing the audience in. The steps to the old dance took over, as if the last time she danced them was yesterday and not centuries ago.
There will come a day when youth will pass away
What will they say about me?
When the end comes, I know
They was just the gigolos
Life goes on without me
The words and steps were simple and repetitive. Quickly, she found with some gentle prodding she could get Magnolia to join her. The circle watching the impromptu performance grew. Many tapped along, laughing as Magnolia tripped over a few stanzas.
I ain't got nobody
Nobody cares for me
Nobody cares for me
I'm so sad and lonely
Sad and lonely, sad and lonely
Won't some sweet mama come and take a chance with me?
'Cause I ain't so bad
As she looked up, Payne could see Hancock watching in the crowd. With his one arm wrapped around the waist of a woman in a ratty dress and the other around the shoulders of a stringy-looking drifter, he lifted one hand in salute. Payne winked back. Turning back to Magnolia, she managed to get the half-drunk patrons to stumble along with a call and response, most whooping with lighthearted laughter by the end.
Payne was huffing by the time she took her sloppy bow with Mag. They were walking back to their seats when Hancock slid up to the bar next to them.
“I leave you alone for 10 minutes and you bring the place down!”
“Sorry to steal your limelight, boss,” Payne was still smiling from ear to ear. “I’ll blame it on the whisky if you like.”
“I know you better than that. You love the spotlight.” Hancock smiled back. “You were really grooving to that. Why don’t you keep it?”
Payne took the record off the player and put it back in the box. “Nah, I’m tight on caps remember?” She tapped her temple. “But, if you want to do something for me… have Daisy send it to that DJ in Diamond City.”
“Letting everyone in the Commonwealth enjoy it too? How can I say no to that, sister?” A roguish smirk stretched across his face. “How about you do a little something for me first?”
“Let me guess… you’ve double-booked a tour tonight?” Payne couldn’t help but roll her eyes a bit.
“You’re a mind reader! Clear out the VIP lounge for a private party, would ya?”
Payne got up, mocking indignation and put a playful finger on his chest. “Make sure that record makes it to Diamond City.”
“Scout’s honor.” His grin was growing. Payne knew he would do as she asked.
“You don’t even know what that means…” Payne headed off to the corner of the club. It took few minutes to clear everyone out. MacCready grumbled the most. He only moved after she mentioned the only way he was staying in the lounge was if he didn’t mind watching the festivities. After the area was vacated, she drew the threadbare curtain and pulled the improvised rope across the entrance.
It took her a second to get Hancock’s attention from across the room, his head buried in the neck of the waif of a woman. The trio ambled up slowly, the chems and drink slowing their progress.
“Weapons.” Payne commanded as they approached the lounge. Both of the wanderers looked confused.
“Really?” Hancock cocked his head.
“I’m your bodyguard before I’m your wingman. You know the deal.” She held out her hands. “Hand’ em over.” Reluctantly a few knifes and a six-shooter found their way into her possession.
“Enjoy your flight.” Payne teased as she lowered the rope for them to pass, though few would have gotten the reference. The rest of the night was easy. She nursed another whiskey and listening to Magnolia most of the night. Both were pleasant distractions as she stood guard until Hancock stumbled home early the next morning.
#antique champagne#fallout#fallout 4#fanfic#fan fic#payne#hancock#drugs#the third rail#music#dancing#acting a fool#emotions#family
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Karlie Kloss' Express Runway Show Featured Women of All Races and Ethnicities
Growing up, Karlie Kloss couldn't find jeans that fit — and had to wear tall boots to disguise her high-waters. The supermodel even admits to feeling "body envy" for her sisters, who had shorter, curvier frames. "I was always the flat, tall, skinny girl in the room and they were curvy. And I was always so insecure about that," she tells Teen Vogue. "In my house, we were all different shapes and sizes and eventually, we learned to embrace our own uniqueness. That's when you truly start to shine." With that journey toward body confidence in mind, she created a line of wardrobe staples for Express that "flatters different shapes" — from high-waisted trousers that complement her own tall figure to a fitted pencil skirt inspired by her sister's curves. A collaboration with celebrity stylist Karla Welch, the 17-piece capsule brings Karlie's unique brand of model-off-duty dressing to the masses. It ranges from $25 for a fitted t-shirt to $168 for a reversible bomber jacket.
On Thursday (Mar. 30), Karlie returned to the site of her first runway show at 13-years-old — the Pageant Theater in St. Louis, Missouri — to debut her collaboration with Express. Fans filed into the venue for a chance to meet the supermodel-turned-business mogul, who also runs a coding scholarship program for teen girls, Kode With Klossy, and launched a vegan baked goods collab with Momofuku Milk Bar. Alongside the fashion show, the audience enjoyed a performance by Charli XCX and a DJ set by Hannah Bronfman.
It was important to Karlie to send a diverse group of women down the runway. She hosted a national competition to scout non-models for the show, and tapped women of all races and ethnicities — including Tiara Sevon Cook, a military service member with short natural hair, and Mattea Linea, a local photographer born in South Korea. On Karlie's runway, Summer Albarcha became the second hijab-wearing model to walk in a major fashion show since Halima Aden at Fall 2017 Fashion Week. The significance of that moment wasn't lost on Summer, a modest fashion blogger based in St. Louis. "Growing up, I rarely saw anyone who dressed like I do in magazines or on television, so I feel very proud and grateful to have been able to walk in Karlie's show," Summer told Teen Vogue. "I hope to be able to bridge the gap between mainstream and modest fashion for my sisters around the world." With recent reports about models being discriminated against for their race, size, gender identity, and hair texture, it's more important than ever that diverse casting becomes the norm and not the exception.
Karlie is hopeful that the industry is progressing in the right direction. "I want more inclusivity in fashion, and for me, it's important to stand for that," she said. Ahead, get your first look at Karlie's collection — alongside her tips for making it in fashion, embracing your body, taking the best selfies, and so much more.
Teen Vogue: I heard you walked in this venue for a runway show when you were 13!
Karlie Kloss: It's a total full-circle moment for me. This is where it all began. It was 11 years ago. I remember distinctly how it all went down, and how nervous I was. It was a big charity runway show and the whole community bought tickets. It was to benefit my friend's family because her Dad had cancer. I was not anticipating starting a career, or thinking about modeling or fashion whatsoever.
I got cast at the mall, in an open casting. I remember — even at that point — the people who worked with me would say 'Karlie, you have this unique walk. Usually, we're telling girls how to walk and changing their walk but we're just going to let you do your thing.' And it's so funny because I never felt like I was doing anything different. And at 15, I went to New York City for a weekend, and got booked to walk for Calvin Klein. And that's when my career began full-time.
TV: Looking back, what advice would you give that 13-year-old girl now after you've accomplished so much in the industry?
KK: You have no idea what's ahead. Just you wait! Just buckle down and enjoy every minute of it. I'd tell myself to not overthink things, not to take yourself too seriously. As girls, we can be so hard on our ourselves. We're so self-critical. So I'd say, self-love is key and just enjoy the moment.
TV: How did this collaboration with Express come about?
KK: My sisters, friends and I grew up locally here [in St. Louis], and Express was definitely a destination that I would shop at for back-to-school shopping. In the past few years, in my modeling career, I've worked with Express on my campaigns as a creative consultant. A year ago, we started this conversation about designing a collection together. I wanted it to be super authentic to the pieces I love most in my wardrobe. I wanted to design the ultimate staples that my sisters and friends could benefit from, pieces that can be dressed up and down, worn at work or just hanging out with your girls.
I worked really closely with Karla Welch, my stylist, to think through how to create simple pieces with a little bit of an edge. Express has been an amazing partner to take these designs and make them on a large scale and flatter all different shapes. Even in my house, my sisters and I are all different heights and shapes and sizes.
TV: What are your thoughts on how the industry is progressing in terms of diversity and representation?
KK: I grew up with sisters with different body types. I've always had body envy of my sisters because they always had curves. I was always the flat, tall, skinny girl in the room, and I was always so insecure about that. Even when I began my modeling career, and was successful because of my tall, lanky body, I was still insecure. I'd come back to St. Louis and my sisters had these curves and all this different texture hair, and I always felt so Plain Jane. And I was so jealous of them. You always want what you don't have.
But, I don't think that there's 'one size that fits all' in the fashion industry. There's so much beauty in uniqueness. I want more inclusivity in fashion, and for me, it's important to stand for that. On our runway, we have girls of all backgrounds. And that's what I find beautiful. When people embrace their own uniqueness, and have confidence, they shine the best. The industry has gotten better over the past 10 years, but we still have a lot of progress to make, especially in terms of diversity on the runway. I'm definitely starting to see small steps in the right direction.
TV: Is there one piece from the collection that you especially love?
KK: I love a high-waisted trouser. So, for me, this is just such a staple. I love a boss lady pant and boss lady pantsuit. I have a white and a black matching blazer and high-waisted trouser. We have two reversible bombers, and it's like 2 jackets for the price of 1. I love the retro summer dresses. They're super effortless: there's a red one, and one in a black-and-white polka dot print. Those you can dress up with heels and a red lip, or you can wear them with sneakers, which is totally my vibe.
TV: Speaking of your vibe, you've created your own brand of model-off-duty dressing. How would you describe your personal style?
KK: I'm really true to myself, and I'm really simple. I love pieces that are comfortable because I live a busy life — running from class, to work, to the airport, catching up with friends. I love my Stan Smiths. I live in my sneakers because I'm 6'2"! I hope my style is chic and timeless, but with a little bit of an edge. And I love a mini skirt and a mini dress. Now that it's starting to get somewhat warmer, I say get those legs out.
TV: What's one trend you'd never wear?
KK: I'm always up for trying new things but I'd never wear a flood pant or a drop-crotch pant because I'm so tall. There's certain things I know wouldn't work for my body.
TV: What would your fans be surprised to learn about you?
KK: There's a lot of random, weird things about me, including my love of coding and general nerdiness. That fact shocked a few people I'm sure. Also, I'm really amazing at selfies. My tips are to always find natural light whenever possible. Whenever I take a picture, I find the first window. And I tilt the camera up above your head and find my angle. I've perfected the lighting technique. Oh! And always, always hit the side button. (x)
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Fifty Years of Going to Shows, Pt. 1: The First Decade in Kansas City (mostly)
A photo of a flyer of Led Zeppelin’s 11/3/69 show at Memorial Hal in Kansas City, Kansas, showed up in my FB feed. I was there; it was my second concert; and I was 14 years and 6 weeks old. So the first one, Johnny Winter, was somewhere in the late summer or fall before then. I declared the 9/4/19 Hot Tuna show as the 50th Anniversary but that’s not strictly accurate. It will do just fine though.
It prompts this series of reminiscences of the magic of live music in my life. That was the intoxicant (well, except for that Jefferson Airplane show in October 1970), but it still has been addictive. But--and this is speaking as a Deadhead--seeing the show has always been more important than the party. I’ve only recently taken to writing my souvenirs and even setlist curation came along later, thanks to the Dead.But I do have these memories and will indulge myself with a series of souvenirs.That Johnny Winter show got my hooked (blues, guitar solos on top of guitar solos, and loud). Winter slid along the stage in a trance; I somehow even recall a purple velvet jacket setting off his long white hair. Brother Edgar came out to play organ, including on an extended “Tobacco Road” that was part of the show in those days. I would see Winter again a couple of times in KC, mostly with And, made up of Rick Derringer and other members of the McCoys. Those were more rock’n’roll (hoochie koo, don’t you know) than deep blues but he was a hell of a player. He was here in St. Louis just a few months before he died. I considered going but didn’t and so missed closing that circle.
That Led Zeppelin show sucked. It was short, they used borrowed equipment, and Bonham was drunk and knocked over a cymbal stand more than once.
Somehow I wasn’t deterred.Memorial Hall--3500 seats maybe, also home to professional wrestling--was the primary venue for my very early days in the 1970s. Show <5 was Delaney and Bonnie and Friends, including Eric Clapton. That was my only time to see him and it was right at the time when he just wanted to be a member of a band. So, he did do “Crossroads” as a showcase but he was restrained and tasty, dammit. I wish I knew their repertoire and appreciated how those players were interchangeable on albums by Dave Mason, George Harrison, Joe Cocker, and again with Clapton including in Derek and the Dominoes.
We snuck in there to see the end of BB King’s set one night and wished we’d paid for the whole show. This was pre-celebrity days, so it was a Black crowd and I have to think the show was better for it.
Memorial Hall is also where I sort of saw Jefferson Airplane, hampered by empty stomach excitement, Ripple, and brownies. At the same time, though I felt very small and the music was very loud, it is the 10/24/70 set list that survives that is the one I remember. So maybe I wasn’t as brownied as I thought. The “We Can Be Together>Volunteers” opener was striking and “The Fat Angel” (Casady on a droning rhythm guitar) was hypnotic. It was enough though to shift exclusively to booze and keep my head at shows.
I also recall a wonderful Dicky (well, actually, Richard for this tour) Betts show with a large band that did bluegrass and country (Vassar Clements was in the band, but I think there were some horns) as well as blues and rock and a gigantic “In Memory of Elizabeth Reed.”
My one bit of the Dead early was seeing the New Riders of the Purple Sage with Loggins and Messina as a warm up act. It was an actual date with an actual young woman and, though I saw her for a while more, I was a bit too transfixed by the music. Misplaced priorities. I saw Loggins and Messina another time in that venue and the horn section was particularly developed in making the tunes so unique. A middle show along the lines of their live double album with the wonderfully jammed out “Vahevala” was perhaps elsewhere (I nominate Cowtown Ballroom of which I will say more shortly).
Bonnie Raitt with Jackson Browne was a good pairing, though she was better. And there was Poco still doing the core repertoire with that long jam tune that came from Messina and relied on Rusty Grantham pulling magic out of the pedal steel.
I did finally the Grateful Dead in that good old hall twice in 1972 and once in 1977, but there is at least one separate installment on that universe to come.
But what a place!
Cowtown Ballroom, an old skating rink, run by a veteran of Bill Graham’s operation was a slightly later haunt. It stands out for 11 pm Hot Tuna shows that went on and on. That was my regular taste of San Francisco. Loud, loud, loud and maybe too jammy. That is, I sensed that between Jorma jamming on and Papa John Creach’s fiddle, poor Jack Casady had to play three dimensional chess to anticipate the note that would pull it altogether. It was brilliant but not a powerful as him at full throttle. Still I loved those shows for the promise of the possibilities
The other Cowtown act was the Nitty Gritty Dirt Band in the classic “Uncle Charlie and His Dog Teddy” quintet, doing Kenny Loggins songs before he was Kenny Loggins, all sorts of roots music before that’s what we called it, and great versatility with some jaw dropping fiddle excursion and/or with other instruments from John McEuen. Now their warm up act for 4 shows in 14 months was a comedian named Steve Martin who was really funny the first time and I wanted my friends to hear it the second time. By the third time, it was stale. By the fourth time, I started doing punch lines ahead of him first to my friends and then to a wider circle. I was getting his laughs from 20-30 people just enough of the rest of the crowd to throw off the rhythm.
But, I’d go to lots of Cowtown shows: Badfinger (Beatle tinged, but not the Fabs themselves, and I’ve never seen any of them, not Macca nor even Ringo’s All Starr revue), the KC Symphony playing on the floor to reach a new audience. Zappa twice--with Flo and Eddie in the band and Steely Dan on its first tour (Zappa was sneering) and the Waka Jawaka big horn section show--enough to convince me that he was quite a guitar player.
Freedom Palace was another venue for a while, bigger than Cowtown, maybe even than Memorial Hall. It was certainly easier to spread out in. I remember it for guitar shows, Johnny Winter And and Mountain.
Municipal Auditorium was the big venue of 12,000. It was cavernous and sound wasn’t good in those days. Stephen Stills on the tour that included a set with the Memphis Horns was a little clunky. Neil Young supporting Harvest was better in the same space, but it wasn’t Crazy Horse. Crosby and Nash were next door in the Orchestra Hall and they were magical with the same show as “Just Another Stoney Night.” Crosby wisecracked (except there was a standard bit of interchangeable patter it turns out) and the acoustic guitars rang over glorious vocals on the key parts of that fabulous repertoire. I saw Crosby and Nash with Jeff Pevar in Pittsburgh courtesy of Ellen’s brother in the 1980s and that was pretty special.
But I saw all 4 as part of that groundbreaking 1974 tour, one of the first big Bill Graham national tours. Jesse Colin Young and then the Beach Boys opened fabulously. The churning guitars from a dark stage hinting at a tune that I couldn’t quite place before Bam! lights on and it’s “Love the One You’re With” is as dramatic as anything I’ve seen.
I need to get back to Municipal Auditorium but let me stay outside for a lackluster Allman Brothers Band show with the Brothers and Sisters line up. Dicky at least, possibly Gregg too seemed off and maybe Chuck Leavell hadn’t quite found his place. But that was a hard time for that band. Over at the football stadium, the Rolling Stones did not deploy the inflatable phallus for us in 1975 but they kicked it out hard following Chaka Khan and The Eagles as openers. Jagger’s energy was amazing and Keef had that band, including Billy Preston on keys and at least Bobby Keys on sax, able to turn on a dime.
Okay, I had learned the Municipal Auditorium lesson and knew to sit on the floor as close as possible. That worked on back to back nights for Stevie Wonder the first night for a heavy “Innervisions/Talking Book” set list with maybe some of “Fulfillingness First Finale” songs being road tested. It was funky and loose for us hippies but the Motown professionalism was something to behold. The next night was Weather Report for the first time, Jaco was there but more restrained than a later show at an old movie theater, The Midland.” Opening for Weather Report was a Richard Thompson-less Airport Convention. But Dave Swarbrick was leading the festivities and I mentioned this show to him when he was at Focal Point here in St. Louis with Martin Carthy. It is both true that he barely remembered it but that, yes, it was weird. I wish I paid more attention.
Besides Weather Report later at the Midland, I best remember there a strong strong Little Feat show building on the momentum of “Waiting for Columbus.” I guess Lowell George was not that happy then, but that was one of my favorite eras for the band with a double jointed rhythm with guitars, keys, and George’s voice sailing over it all. For both shows, I was sitting fairly high overlooking the banks of keyboards Joe Zawinul and then Billy Payne had deployed. My favorite Weather Report era actually is with Alphonso Johnson rather than Jaco, so the earlier show at Municipal Auditorium suited me better. Jaco’s flash was still unique and “Birdland” was catchy not an ear worm, but on the whole Wayne Shorter was given less and less space. Still, Shorter and Zawinul together on “Badia” or even “In a Silent Way” leading into “Boogie Woogie Waltz” was a high point at both shows.
Since I’m fusioning, I liked Chick Corea’s Return to Forever tour in support of “Romantic Warrior.” Though Stanley Clarke showcased “Bass Folk Song” mostly solo and the acoustic but bombastic “Romantic Warrior” grabbed me more than guitar, piano, synthesizer surges.
I saw two Headhunters shows from Herbie Hancock with lots of rhythmic fun/k and even pyrotechnics. He couldn’t help but play beautiful Fender Rhodes. But what I really liked was seeing the Mwandishi band at a proper jazz club with sit down dinner courtesy of a friend’s parents. That band had all the fusion elements, rhythm and electronics, but there were three horns for Hancock to arrange and an acoustic piano so that he could work into and out of “Maiden Voyage.”
One of my most favorite shows ever but obscure as can be was somewhat fusion-y, The Jerry Hahn Brotherhood playing to 100 people max in a funny little venue in a converted dry cleaner establishment near 39th and Main in Kansas City. Hahn had played with Gary Burton after Larry Coryell but before Pat Metheny and had been at Monterey with John Handy. He was playing a Les Paul in overalls and grew a beard. Mel Graves, bass, and George Marsh, drums and who showed up with David Grisman in the 1990s, were also jazzers gone to seed. Hahn was from Wichita and they hooked up with an organist/singer who played with Dave Mason and then the 1980s Crosby Stills and Nash named Mike Finigan. He had been in a Lawrence, KS, band with Lane Tietgen who had a batch of countryish songs that nonetheless had both clever words and similar spaces for soloing. I was captivated and saw them two nights in a row. Only a few of us in the world ever saw them, but they were an amazing amalgam of sounds.
I had to leave town to see Bob Dylan, but see him I did by going over to St. Louis to see him on that stunning tour with The Band. They’d settled into them opening and closing the first set together with a The Band interlude. The second set was Dylan acoustic, the Band, and then a burning ending. I recall that our show got “Desolation Row” in the slot that often went to “It’s All Right Ma (I’m Only Bleeding),” so that was a treat. But, the key songs from both of them were there. I saw a 1979 show in Chicago courtesy of a friend there, a more sprawling set and band, plus more songs from albums I didn’t know as well. I wasn’t drawn back into the Dylan universe then and really haven’t been back. I did see a couple of Never Ending Tour shows--2004 and 2007 with Elvis Costello--but I am once again in the midst of passing on what could be my last chance to see such a seminal influence.
But I have my memories. Dylan and others are part of this first decade of listening. I never saw a Beatle or Paul Simon or Joni Mitchell or Van Morrison. But I did get into this game when giants walked the earth.
So I have my memories.
Next, probably, more jazz and fusion in KC and Chicago; Focal Point and its predecessors; jam bands; separately, the Grateful Dead cosmos; and jazz recently. Possibly, European Tradition Art Music (lobbying for this as more accurate than “classical” because only a small part of the tradition is Classical)
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PREMIERE + Q&A: Anomalie Personifies His Namesake in ‘Métropole Part II’
According to the all-knowing dictionary.com, an anomaly is “a deviation from the common rule” or “one that does not fit in.” A surname so fitting for Montréal producer Nicolas Dupuis who has become known for his avant-garde approach to electronic music. As Dupuis gears up for the release of his newest body of work, Métropole Part II, due out Oct. 5, Anomalie plans to obliterate the rules of electronic music in pursuit of a genre uniquely his own.
Though deeply engrossed in his study of classical and jazz piano performance for 17 years, Anomalie began to steadily build a loyal fan following for his original music in his hometown of Montréal. After producer, Gramatik saw Anomalie soloing over his beats on Instagram in 2016, the producer invited him to be his touring keyboardist and offered to put out his first EP, Métropole under Gramatik’s label Lowtemp. Since its release in June 2017, the first EP has been received with tremendous support from electronic, funk, R&B, and jazz music fans worldwide.
A virtuoso on the piano and an artist dedicated to perfecting his live performance, Dupuis’s rise to fame as a solo act was accelerated tremendously by posting videos of him shredding the keys on social media, many of which quickly became viral sensations. Additionally, the massive success of his 2017 release “Velours” off Métropole has garnered him fans internationally and the praise of notable artists such as Snarky Puppy, Charlie Puth, Thundercat, Kamasi Washington, Bruno Major, Polyphia, and more!
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This brings us to eve of his second release Métropole Part II, the second installment of the two-part project inspired by his hometown of Montréal, Quebec. In a stunning seven-track EP, Dupuis musically reminisces on the various places in Montréal that are closest to his heart. Each track brings forth various emotions and layers of musicality that showcase Dupuis’s integrity on his instrument and dedication to his very personal message.
In a massive of collide of classical, jazz, and funk the listener gets a thrilling taste of Dupuis’s musical world, filled to the brim with musical anomalies. Intro track “Canal” and the final track “Fin” brings forth some strong dream-like, impressionist feels, reminiscent of Claude Debussy or Maurice Ravel, of course with a layer of funk to keep you grooving. We see the jazz influence ring strong in middle tracks “Notre-Dame Est,” “Crescent,” and “Notre-Dame Ouest,” as Dupuis channels cool jazz and even some bebop, seemingly-inspired by the likes of Thelonious Monk or Dave Brubeck. Yet, while paying homage to music that many today consider “high art,” Dupuis always manages to maintain pop palatability by introducing modern pop music flair with a healthy dose of electronic and hip-hop inspired beats and sonorities.
But don’t take it from us, hear from the musical mastermind himself as we dive into the details behind this epic new release and what is in store next for Anomalie.
OTW: How did you come up with the name Anomalie?
Dupuis: I was initially looking for a name that was spelled in French, but that could also be pronounced in English and other languages. "Anomalie" made sense since it represented the "unconventional" approach I had/have of producing music that's influenced by many genres and has a performed instrument (the keyboard) as the centerpiece. I still think it's appropriate, but it's definitely not unconventional in today's world where more and more instrumentalists are stepping into the production scene, and where most genres are actually hybrids with multiple influences.
OTW: Though you are a classically trained pianist, what inspired you to move more towards a jazz-funk music realm?
Dupuis: During high school, I started "producing" electronic tracks with Garage Band, and most of the music I was listening to was electronic (Deadmau5, Wolfgang Gartner, Koan Sound and Skrillex later on, etc.). I was fascinated by all the synths they used and I was convinced that all those sounds were played in real time, so my approach early on was to record similar sounds by performing them on the keyboard. I later discovered that it was rarely the case in electronic music, which is totally fine, but when I found out about Herbie Hancock and the jazz fusion world where they actually shredded amazing solos with synth sounds, I was in heaven. I did a 4-year program studying jazz performance and played in a couple of ensembles, after which I was introduced to a local hip hop jam session in Montreal. I joined the house band and discovered a whole world there, which I absolutely loved. All of those experiences and my classical background heavily contributed to what Anomalie is today.
OTW: Ever since your debut EP Métropole dropped in 2017, it has garnered lots of attention from listeners all around the world. What/who were some of your biggest inspirations for the creation of this project?
Dupuis: Dave Grusin, Herbie Hancock, J Dilla, Oscar Peterson, Skrillex, Brahms, Stravinski, Ennio Morricone, Vangelis, D'Angelo, MJ, Quincy Jones
OTW: You sold out your first ever Canadian/North American tour earlier this year with a four-piece band. Now you’re set to tour Europe and Asia with them this Fall. How did you go about putting together your band? How does the band recreate your productions live?
Dupuis: What I call "the old Anomalie" started in 2012. It was a way different project back then, in many many ways, so I like to think of Métropole as the start of the current Anomalie, even if the project evolves in various directions moving forward. When it did start back then though, I was already playing with a live band for local shows in Montréal. It consisted of some great friends I made during the Jazz Performance program at Cégep Saint-Laurent. I still play with them and an awesome drummer I met at the hip-hop jam session, LeCypher (which is still going on every Thursday at Bootlegger, it's absolutely amazing.) It definitely was a challenge to start with the live band right away for the first tour, since there are so many aspects to consider and work on, given the nature of the set, and they are all very, very time consuming. But it's incredibly rewarding, and I'm so grateful for those guys, they're great people and great musicians. I re-arrange the song so that everyone performs the main parts of the tracks, with tons of patches and effects. What we can't play on top of what we're already playing, I leave in the backing tracks.
OTW: Your second EP Métropole Part II is set to release on Oct 5th. What can listeners expect from this EP? Is there a stark contrast between Métropole and Métropole Part II, or are they cohesive sonically?
Dupuis: It's definitely a continuity of the first one, with a shared theme and sonic universe. I would say that it's a bit less electronic, and even more focused on the piano as a lead instrument.
OTW: Can we expect any collaborations with other artists in the future?
Dupuis: Yes, this upcoming year is all about collaborations. Métropole as a series is about my own creative, sonic universe, whereas for all future releases I am definitely interested in working with as many different people as possible.
OTW: Who are some of your Ones to Watch?
Dupuis: Tennyson has been so inspiring for me since I discovered them, I look forward to every release with lots of excitement. The amount of detail in each track is crazy. Knower and Louis Cole's solo stuff are also crazy, and the direction they're taking with the live band/big band stuff is huge. One of the most inspiring phenomenons I've been following very closely though is the rise of crazy talented and hard-working young (sometimes surprisingly young!?) musicians. Check these people out on Instagram: Aron the bassist, Justin "baby boy drummer", Justin Lee Schultz, Domi and JD Beck. Craaazy.
Take an exclusive sneak peek at Métropole Part II below + experience the musical magic live on Anomalie’s fall, 2018 international tour!
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Unexpected Consequences. Part D.
"The baby's yours?"
"Yeh he is."
"So what the hell are you going to do now?"
Charlie closed his eyes and massaged his temples. "I... I want the chance to... I've missed out on so much with Louis. I don't want that to happen again. But... I've screwed up..." He sighed.
"I think it's about time you told her the truth about how you really feel." Josh suggested gently.
"I can't! Her husband just died. She and the boys are grieving. It's not the right time to tell her."
"When will be the right time then? She just gave birth to your baby! You say you don't want to miss out yet you're refusing to tell her how you really feel. I know you're scared but it's the only way you have any chance of moving forward with this."
Charlie sighed. He knew that Josh was right, he had to tell her the truth. He owed her that at the very least. Especially given how angry he'd been at her for lying. But they'd been dancing around this issue for nearly 20 years. Several times over that period they'd stumbled across the line, usually when alcohol or emotions were flowing too freely but they'd always managed to salvage the situation before it caused too much damage. Until this time, this time they'd gone too far. An innocent child had now been thrown into the chaos. Charlie hung his head, shaking it slowly.
"Go speak to her." Josh encouraged, placing his hand on Charlie's shoulder. "You love her, you'll find a way to make it right."
Charlie looked over at Josh and squeezed his shoulder, giving him a grateful smile.
Josh nodded and patted his friend's shoulder. "Call me when you get a chance."
Charlie nodded and began walking back towards the main building. His nerves grew as he walked towards her room. He stood briefly frozen outside, staring at the partially open door. He drew in a deep breath, let it out slowly and walked through the doorway, knocking on the door as he passed. "Hi, how you feeling?" He asked nervously.
Duffy briefly glanced up from the magazine she was reading. "Fine." She mumbled before going back to reading.
He rubbed his hand across the back of his neck. "Can we talk? Please."
"Mmm." She replied without looking up from the magazine.
Charlie walked over to her and gently removed the magazine from her lap. She looked up briefly and glared at him before returning her gaze to her lap as she sat fiddling with her fingers.
"We need to talk properly Duffy."
Her head snapped up. "Oh so now you want to talk, do you? Well maybe I don't!"
Charlie briefly closed his eyes and sighed. "I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't have walked out earlier but my head was spinning, I needed time to process it all. Did you think I wasn't coming back?"
"I didn't know what to think. I didn't do any of this to hurt you Charlie. I never wanted anyone to get hurt..."
"But someone was always going to get hurt regardless of how hard we tried to prevent it." Charlie said, finishing her thoughts. He sat down on the bed beside her. "You've had a chance to explain, now will you give me the same opportunity?" He saw her nod so he continued. "I was shocked when you told me Paul was mine but, well, I'd been suspicious for a while. When you first told me you were pregnant I thought maybe... But you were so upset and stressed about it that I pushed the idea from my mind. Then as the weeks passed and your belly grew bigger I watched as Andrew continued to behave so terribly. I couldn't understand it, he had everything I'd ever wanted - you, a baby on the way - and yet he treated you so poorly. I wanted so desperately to be there for you, to hold you, to show you how much I cared. Especially when..." He closed his eyes and shook his head to try and push away the horrific images and memories. "I froze, I couldn't help you. I wanted to but the sight of you terrified and in such pain, I couldn't handle it." He put his head in his hands.
Duffy's heart broke seeing him so upset. She attempted to reach out to him, to comfort him, but her movements were slowed by her sore and aching muscles. "Charlie..."
As he saw her begin to move towards him he got up from the bed. He knew that if he allowed her close then he would lose control completely and be unable to speak. He needed to tell her everything so he had to keep some distance between them. "I'm sorry." He mumbled. He began to pace, his hand moving to the back of his neck as he tried to find the words. "After that Andrew suddenly seemed to start treating you better, like a husband should treat his pregnant wife. I thought maybe it had given him a wake up call. But something didn't add up. You seemed uncomfortable with his attention. I couldn't understand why. Then that family started fighting in the cubicles, I panicked that they'd hurt you. Andrew seemed to just walk away, implying that I should step up. It made no sense at the time but now I realise - he knew didn't he?"
"I never told him outright but I'm sure he suspected. When he started being so sweet towards me, fussing over me like he had when I was pregnant with Jake... The guilt. I couldn't handle it."
Charlie sighed. "How did things end up in such a mess? How did we let things get so out of hand?"
"I think we both know the answer to that Charlie."
He looked over at her incredulously. "You think this is just some physical thing? That we simply can't resist the sexual attraction between us? Well you're wrong, Duffy, I love you! I always have, that's what makes all of this so painful and confusing."
Her heart leapt and her head spun as she attempted to absorb what he'd just confessed. He loved her! The one thing she'd always wanted - his love - was within her grasp. Her stomach lurched as she attempted to articulate the words to explain her feelings for him, feelings she had attempted to bury for so long, determined to allow herself to only experience the physical sensations when they were together for fear of having her heart smashed if he didn't feel the same. But he did. He loved her just like she loved him. The thought overwhelmed her and she began to cry.
As he saw the tears roll down her cheeks Charlie could stay away no longer. He was quickly at her side and took her gently in his arms, stroking her hair as he attempted to soothe her.
"I love you too Charlie." She whispered. "I just couldn't tell you incase... incase you didn't feel the same way."
Charlie moved his hands to gently cup her face, tilting it so she was looking directly at him. He caressed her cheek with his fingertips. "I'll always be here for you, just like I promised. You and the boys. I can give you all the time and space you need to work things out. All I ask is please don't shut me out, talk to me, let me help where I can."
Duffy reached up a hand towards his cheek. "I don't want space. I want you by my side but... The boys. I have to think of them. They're still dealing with losing their father. If they found out what I... What we have done, it would destroy them. I'm sorry!"
"I understand. Believe me I do. They come first and that's how it should be. We can take things one small step at a time. That's ok, we've got all the time in the world."
"We do. We really do." She paused, at a loss as to what else to say.
Charlie took hold of her hand, his fingers nervously playing with hers. "I'd really like to go see Paul again." He bit his lip and glanced up at her quickly. "Is that OK?"
Duffy smiled. "You don't have to ask, Charlie."
This time when they made their way up to the NICU department the atmosphere was different, more relaxed than the previous visit. They approached Paul's incubator and Duffy quietly watched the range of emotions that flowed across Charlie's face as he observed his son. She nudged his side gently and nodded incouragingly towards the cot when he turned to look at her.
Charlie stepped forward and reached out a finger to stroke Paul's cheek and down his arm. As he reached the boy's hand he felt Paul's tiny fingers wrap around his fingertip. Charlie gasped at the rush of emotions the action triggered within him, a single tear escaping down his cheek. "I... Do you think he knows who I am?" He whispered.
Duffy reached over and squeezed Charlie's arm. "Of course he does."
Charlie shifted his hands to lift the boy up into his arms but unlike the previous time instead of handing Paul straight to Duffy he held the boy close to him as he sat down in a chair. He lay Paul against his chest. Looking down he chuckled.
"What is it?" Duffy queried confused.
"He's just like you." Charlie smiled, indicating the way that Paul had shifted slightly to rest his cheek against Charlie's heart. "That seems to be your favourite spot too. Looks like you'll have to learn to share!"
Duffy smiled and rested her head against Charlie's shoulder, her fingers absentmindedly stroking Paul's head.
Charlie tilted his head and lightly kissed Duffy's hair. His gaze flickered between her and Paul. It was all he'd ever wanted. "Whatever it takes, I want this to work. For you, me and the boys to be a family." He whispered, biting his lip to try and contain his emotions.
Duffy smiled softly, her heart melting at his words and the sincerity in his eyes. "We'll find a way." She stated adamantly before sighing. "It will take time and I can't promise it'll be easy but we'll get there in the end. It's our time now."
"Our time." He echoed as he kissed her.
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