prompt: when you get put in charge of babysitting for the day, it's time to play house.
word count: 1.5k
warnings: mentions of parental passings, baby referred to as big/chubby (affectionally of course, i was/am a chubby ass baby)
strongly recommend listening to annie by john denver as you read :)
Babies seem to always gravitate towards certain people, whether related or not, and while some force it, others come naturally.
Eddie was a reluctant baby man.
Any of his friends' younger siblings immediately latched onto his leg as he walked by, realizing his jeans were not heavy a mere moment ago, looking down to see a smile full of open gaps.
As much as he tried to grimace, the attention was quite nice on both ends as the small babes usually sunk into a pit of giggles. This happened to be the case when your older sister came to town, leaving you at home to take care of her 8 month old for the day.
The morning was fairly quiet, Pamela sleeping for most of it, occasionally waking up to play with some toys. She wasn’t the clingiest baby, but found comfort in your arms as you swayed her on your hip.
“Who the hell is that?” Eddie asked, having let himself in the door after seeing your care alone in the driveway. Approaching the tiny human with skepticism, you smiled, turning slightly so he could have a better look at her. She stared up at him from your shoulder, arms flapping with a block securely between her fingers.
“This is Pamela, my niece.” You laughed, sitting on the blue couch, crossing your legs up on the plush seats. He hesitantly sat down, like being too close would somehow cause a shift in the balance of the universe. But her gaze was glued to him.
He let out a chuckle, eyes still wide, “Didn’t she have this baby like two days ago? She’s big, not in a bad way!”
Her chubby little arms extended, dropping her toy with a thud as she leaned closer to Eddie.
“Oh Christ.” He mumbled as she crawled into his lap, holding one of his fingers with a ring on it, “What am I supposed to do with it?”
“Hold her, she doesn’t bite hard.” You teased, watching his hands tentatively wrap around her onesie clad body to bring closer to his chest. The nervous bounce of his leg made her giggle, an unmistakable smile coming to Eddie’s lips at the noise.
The scene was too ironic, the whole town had been scared of Eddie his whole life, when the boy can’t even hold a baby without fear. He was kind, gentle, and sweet, but most people weren’t aware. Even your loved ones were hesitant when you began dating around 2 and a half years ago.
“Okay, she’s pretty cute.” He confessed, her small grasp locking his nose as it scrunched, relaxing further into his seat. She started to climb up his chest, reaching for his hair.
“Pammy, no.” You cooed, lifting her back to your arms, but her face dropped. She whimpered and made grabby hands at the man in front of you, his brown iris’ flickering to yours.
He tentatively held his palms out, where she instantly went back to, and put her on his Iron Maiden tee, face squished against the skull printed on the black fabric.
The next few hours were spent playing house, a fair mix of napping, eating, and changing, the latter being the only activity Eddie opted out of. There was no denying how much Pamela was latching onto him, even catching him talking to her when you excused yourself to the bathroom.
The night was winding down, a soft buzz of the tv mixed with the gentle snores nestled on Eddie’s chest. His hand absentmindedly stroked her soft hair as he yawned, shifting to find more comfort as you sat on your bed.
“If you ever want kids, Eddie, you’ll be a great father.” You whispered as he remained staring down at the little one, a faint blush on his cheeks.
“Do you want kids?” He asked, peering over at you, but you leaned onto his shoulder. If anyone were to come in, it would look as if you were a family, it felt real for a brief moment for him.
You nodded, “Eventually.”
It was quiet once more, a laugh track playing over an episode of The Brady Bunch. Pamela stirred, making a squeaky noise, limbs flexing against him. She started to twist, leading you to pull her between you two, covering her body with the quilt you were already under.
As you both looked down at her, he noticed the features similar to yours. Not an exact match, but you looked close enough to your sister that he could see it in his head, having a family.
“I would name my kid, Annie.” He muttered, watching her chest rise and fall with each breath. Your brows furrowed, trying to think of any significance that name had for him, knowing he isn't obsessed with the musical and doesn't know anyone by that name.
“I don’t have many memories of my mom, a lot of stuff got blocked out, but I remember a few things. She loved John Denver, especially the song Annie, it was his wife's name. But she would sing it to me, spinning me in the kitchen and restarting the record over and over.”
Eddie didn’t talk about his parents a lot, only knowing his dad was arrested when he was 13 and that his mom had passed away when he was 10. When she died, he moved in with Wayne after his dad had a few lashing outs that ended with a bloody nose and a broken arm. He could rant for hours on end about his dad, how shitty he was, how glad he was he was rotting in some jail cell.
But when it came to his mom, he found himself speechless. He remembers her kind eyes, the ones he saw on himself and hated when he got a look at himself angry, thinking of how much she hated seeing him upset. How she would always make cookies, writing notes in his black lunch pail that he now used for more nefarious activities, and her head scarfs that were made of floral fabrics.
“She used to do this thing where she would grab a wooden spoon and sing it,” He swallowed, staring down at Pamela, but you knew his mind had wandered to his childhood home. “She was such a great singer, I think it’s why I love music so much. But her favorite song was Annie, it even played on the radio in the hospital waiting room when she…”
While his voice trailed off, you saw his eyes gloss over, not reaching a point of tears, but nearing. Your hand grabbed his, lacing it together and pressing a kiss to his knuckles. He looked up at you, smiling before planting a kiss on your lips, careful to not put any pressure beneath him as Pam slept.
He gently hummed the melody of the song forever ingrained in his mind along with the wispy laughs from his mom who patched up his skinned knees and kissed his head goodnight. He was terrified of kids, never wanting to lead another member of the Munson family line down a toxic path.
But when he looked down at someone who even resembles you, he knew he wanted that life mixed with his pandemonium.
“Come let me love you, let me give my life to you. Let me drown in your laughter, let me die in your arms. Let me lay down beside you, let me always be with you. Come let me love you, come love me again.” He sang softly, his voice cracking after being so used to singing metal songs loudly.
“We can name ours, Annie.” You whispered as he smirked, propping his head up with his elbow.
He made a false thinking face, stroking his chin, “I don’t know, I’m keeping my options open to the perfect candidate.”
Punching his shoulder, he jolted and laughed, quieting when he felt the baby turn. He grinned unabashedly, tucking hair behind your ear.
“I’m kidding, you’re it for me whether you want me around or not.” He hummed, hearing the sound of the garage opening, sitting up.
“Glad to hear.” You smirked, lifting Pamela to your chest as she lazily opened her bright eyes. “Say goodbye to Uncle Eddie.”
Somehow the title made his chest flutter, standing to kiss her head before you walked down to your sister. The quiet sounds of whispering came from below as he sat on the edge of your bed, fiddling with his watch on his left wrist.
While he tried not to think of his mom often, certain things always reminded him of her and he was glad when they did. As badly as he wanted her back, he knew all he had left was those foggy days behind him, littered with negativity from his father. But those orange hued moments of running in the yard during the summer or the blue cozy memories of hot chocolate on winter nights, that’s what he preferred to think about.
He wanted to be the man she wanted him to be, you wanted him to be, hell, who he wanted to be. While having a baby still terrified him, having a baby with you made him feel secure, and he wouldn’t let that go.
authors note: hi im pmsing and got very emotional over the thought of eddie being a dad sooooo.
taglist: @steeldaisies @meaganjm @masterofmunson @downbythebay4 @wicked-wordy-witchy-witch @femalefilmaker @wiltedwonderland @yourthebrokengirl @jessyballet @iheartyouyou @gloryekaterina @missscarlettangel @variety-fangirl @wigglywoos59 @imsuchafriggensimp @thegirlblogstuff @lovelyladymayyy @strawwberrry @ktjmac @dovesnrosesnreblogs @fknemily @spn-obession @diaryofthedoll @imagine-all-the-imagines
Some Like It Heavy (a stranger things fanfic)
Title: Some Like It Heavy
Fandom: Stranger Things
Characters & Pairings: Eddie x plus-size femme reader
Word Count: ~2,000
Summary: Banging Eddie at the Hideout to teach a groupie a lesson (So, technically also an Eddie lives! fix it fic). Lyrics and title inspo from Halestorm’s “I Like it Heavy.” Can be read as a follow-up to Kashmir or as a stand alone. Lovingly beta-read by @bs-fangirl Additional notes & tropes below the cut.
Tropes & Content Warnings: dirty, nasty adult fun times, public sex, rough sex, voyeristic intentions
I like it louder than the boom of a big bass drum / I need it harder than the sound of guitar grunge…
And just like old school Sabbath, Zeppelin and Lemmy / I need to drop it down low and make it heavy
You hadn’t seen Eddie in weeks. Corroded Coffin was on their first official tour. They were opening for a popular thrash metal band from Chicago on the Midwestern leg of their nation-wide tour. He called when he could, but not as much as you would have liked.
They finally landed back in Hawkins after amassing what Nancy Wheeler’s editorial called a modest, but “cult-like following.” (Because that’s what Eddie had asked her to call it. Because he found the irony hilarious.) It would have been nice to get the band back together–in a manner of speaking–but Dustin was away at MIT, Robin and Vickie had moved to the Bay Area last summer. Nancy and Steve wanted to come out, but their babysitter bailed at the last minute, so in the end, it was just you.
You packed a change of clothes and headed straight to the bar after your late shift at Bradley’s. Even on Fridays, you could usually find premium parking at the Hideout, but tonight the place was packed. It was crazy to think how much Corroded Coffin had blown up in such a short time as you fixed your makeup in the neon light of the Coors sign.
You were proud of Eddie, of course, but also a little scared. Maybe part of the reason the band had gotten so much attention on the road was because of everything that happened. Although they took their sweet time doing it, the Feds had officially cleared Eddie of any wrongdoing, but rumors still circulated.
These people didn’t know Eddie, not like you did. Did they understand that he was a good guy who was in the wrong place at the wrong time? That when the world turned its back on him, he did everything in his power to save it anyway? Mostly, you realized, you were just nervous (and maybe a little sad) for how much things had changed.
Inside the Hideout the air was hot and humid; the whole place stank of weed and stale beer and body odor. At the bar you asked for a double shot of tequila; dreading having to force your way into the pit. Eddie must have been over-the-moon to have people moshing to Corroded Coffin.
You moved slowly through the crowd, going with the flow and letting people bump against you–sometimes having extra padding had its benefits–and throwing the occasional elbow or hip-check as necessary. No one seemed particularly offended as you made your way to the front of the stage, squeezing in right next to one of the amps. The music was so loud you could feel it pulsing through your whole body.
You could tell Eddie was nervous, but he made a charming frontman as he introduced the band before they barrelled into Black Sabbath’s “Paranoid.” The stage lights were near-blinding, but you thought Eddie might have spotted you when he started moving across the stage.
You raised one arm to wave, but he stopped just right of center stage in front of a group of three screaming women with uniform peroxide-blond hair, dark eyeliner, and over-lined lips. They looked to be in their forties–though they were probably younger–too many cigarettes and too much sun taking their toll.
You rolled your eyes as Eddie leaned over, really hamming it up. He had always been a flirt–especially on stage–and you were used to it. What you didn’t like was one of the women reaching up to grab at the inseam of his pants.
Eddie’s eyes went wide and he tried to back up, but before he could the other two had their hands on him and for a horrifying moment, you thought they would manage to pull him off stage.
“Hey! Knock it off!” you practically screamed, just barely able to hear yourself over the music.
The guitar riff faltered as Eddie used the body of his guitar to pry the women off. As the song came to an end, he moved over to Gareth, pointing and pulling a face as he pantomimed stabbing at the crowd with the butt of his guitar. They laughed it off, but it still didn’t sit right with you.
“Hey!” you screamed, pushing your way down the side of the stage until you caught the women’s attention. “Don’t do that. It’s not nice.”
“What are you, the bouncer?” one of the women sneered and they all laughed.
“Don’t grab people,” you said. “You wouldn’t want someone grabbing you like that.”
“You probably wish someone would grab you,” the woman shot back. “Fat bitch.”
You could feel your blood boil as the women went on to discuss their plans to sneak backstage after the show–as if the Hideout had a backstage, let alone one that required sneaking into.
“Coffin Bangers.” That was what Gareth and the others were calling them, though Eddie swore he would never. You believed him, or at least you did at the time. They were no different from your high school bullies; the same ones who would never have given Eddie the time of day back then. He had to know that; didn’t he?
You grabbed a couple of beers from the bar before the set came to a close and wandered down the hall past the bathrooms to the green room–which was really just a converted supply closet where performers could stash their shit. Like the rest of the bar, the floors were always sticky and the walls covered in phone numbers and lewd graffiti.
You waited for Eddie as his bandmates emerged from the back one by one, eager to make their way back to the bar and their adoring fans. Jerry offered you a lazy high five as he passed you in the hall.
“Go get him, tiger.”
You smiled, taking that as your cue to slip into the closet. Eddie was just closing up his guitar case. He had already shed his leather jacket–as good as he looked, it had to be sweltering–and stooped down to tighten the laces on his Docs.
“Hey,” you said.
Eddie looked up, his eyes slowly traveling up to your face. It felt good to be looked at, to be seen.
“Hey,” he smiled, rising to his feet. “You made it!”
You handed him the beer, looking him up and down, taking your time, making sure he noticed your meandering gaze.
“Your number one fan.”
Eddie perched on one of the busted stools and took a swig of the beer. He seemed tired, but happy.
“How’d we sound?”
You inched toward him, watching him closely, the twitch of his fingers, the pulse in his neck, sweat beading at his temples.
“You cut your hair,” you said.
“You like it?” he asked, throwing his head back and shaking from side-to-side.
You nodded, reaching out to run your fingers through his hair, which stopped just above his shoulders. His curls were tighter without the extra length weighing them down. His formerly blunt fringe was starting to grow out, blending in with the rest of his hair, save a few locks still plastered to his sweat-damp face.
“I’m still getting used to it,” he admitted. “It gets pretty hot under the lights–was thinking of chopping it all off. Thought it might be less of a shock like this.”
You bit your lip; Eddie cleared his throat.
“Do you wanna have a couple drinks; listen to the other band?” he asked.
“I want you.”
You slipped two fingers under his belt and pulled him closer. Eddie’s grin widened.
“Let me grab my case and we can get out of here.”
You shook your head. Eddie may have been the musician, but you knew how to play him better than any Gibson.
“Now,” you tugged harder at his belt. “Or not at all.”
“Really,” Eddie chuckled, glancing around the supply closet. “Well, what the lady wants, the lady gets.”
Eddie held your neck as he kissed you, slow and deep, his thumbs resting where your jaw met your ears. He tasted like Molson and menthol cigarettes. You knotted your fists in his sweat-damp shirt and pulled him close.
“Let me lock the door.”
You could feel his heart pounding in time with yours as he finally broke the kiss, panting. Out front, the late-night band was starting their set.
You pulled him back toward you, circling him, pivoting until his back was to the door. You shimmied out of your underwear and kicked them into the corner.
“You know somebody’s gonna walk in here,” he warned, reaching back.
You perched on one of the supply shelves, not certain it would support your weight, but willing to risk it.
“That’s what makes it fun,” you said, spreading your knees, drawing Eddie between them. “Besides, it’s not the worst thing anyone is going to see at this bar tonight.”
The women’s restrooms were rustic at best and rumor had it there was even a glory hole in the men’s. You didn’t want to think about the UTI you were probably going home with; tomorrow you’d chug a gallon of cranberry juice and hope for the best.
“You’re right about that.” Eddie chuckled, leaning down to kiss your throat.
You sighed, resting one hand on the back of his head as his hand slid over your thigh-high nylons and under your mini-skirt.
You slipped your own hands under his shirt, your fingers dancing up past his happy trail to his chest, grazing the sensitive nipples.
Eddie’s left hand pawed at your belly, making its way around your back to draw you closer. His other thumb circled your clit while his first and second fingers slid through your inner lips to explore your sopping wet entrance.
“You see how much I missed you,” you panted in Eddie’s ear, pinning the lobe between your teeth and tugging.
Eddie’s breath hitched as he nodded.
“Are you going to keep me waiting?”
“No,” Eddie shook his head.
You looped one arm around Eddie’s shoulder and slid the other hand down to grope him through his dark jeans–feeling him already stiff and hot.
“Are you going to give me what I want?”
Eddie unbuckled his belt in a hurry and slid his pants down to his knees, taking his hands off you just long enough to roll on a condom (you wondered if he had been a boy scout in a past life, always so prepared) before thrusting into you to the hilt.
You moaned, gripping the shelf above you as the glass bottles rattled with every thrust. You dug your nails into Eddie’s back, letting your head fall back against a case of Budweiser.
“Fuck,” Eddie breathed, yanking your top out of the way to bury his face in the tops of your breasts, his teeth grazing the sensitive skin.
“Still the best tits in Indiana.”
Eddie dipped his tongue into your cleavage as you wound your fingers into his hair.
As the music from the bar reverberated down the hall, Eddie moved in time with the thrumming bass. You wrapped your legs around his waist, squeezing him into you. Even the tight sharpness of it felt good.
Eddie pushed into you obligingly, gripping the shelves on either side of your head for support, bottoming out inside of you. His girth stretched you open, the very tip of his cock pressing up against your sensitive cervix. Eddie had a way of flicking his hips at the end of each stroke, massaging that same bundle of nerves from the inside, leaving you aching for more.
“You like that?”
Eddie moaned as you yanked his head back, sealing your mouth over his, biting down on his bottom lip until you tasted bright copper penny metallic.
You pulled back to wipe your thumb over his split lip and met Eddie’s gaze, his pupils blown out, nearly eclipsing the chocolate brown of his irises.
“Harder,” you growled.
The shelf under you creaked dangerously with each thrust. Eddie grabbed your ass, jerking your body forward to support more of your weight on his hips. Damn, had he always been able to manhandle you like this?
You gasped as an electric jolt raced up your spine from your soaked and swollen pussy. Your hands scrambled for leverage on the storeroom shelves.
A bottle toppled off the shelf beside you and smashed on the floor. You moaned as Eddie brought a hand to your face–protecting you from the spray of booze and possible shards of glass.
“Damn, girl,” he gasped. “I’m only human.”
You whimpered, running your hands down his back, grabbing his ass and squeezing hard. You were both sweating, grunting, surprising yourself with how good it felt–embracing your horniness, your animal nature.
“How’s it feel?” you said.
“Hot,” Eddie panted, bringing a hand to your breast. “Heavy.”
You nodded, your nose brushing against Eddie’s. He chuckled softly, his warm breath tickling your skin.
“Soft,” he said. “Wet. Tight.”
“Feels good, doesn’t it?”
Eddie moaned as you ran your tongue up his throat–tasting the salty sourness of his body.
You heard the door creak on its hinges. Eddie turned to look, but you grabbed his face and pulled him into another open-mouthed kiss. As your tongues moved together, just as naturally as the rest of your bodies, your eyes flickered open just long enough to catch a glimpse of blond hair in the harsh fluorescents.
You slid your hand out of Eddie’s hair, curling it into a fist at the nape of his neck, extending your middle finger. After a moment you thought you heard the door latch, but it didn’t matter. The whole bar could watch for all you cared. Fuck pretty and perfect; you wanted it dirty and gritty and hot as hell.
You sank your teeth into Eddie’s shoulder as you came on his cock. Your inner walls contracting and releasing around him in satisfying waves like the reverb of guitar strings.
“Mine,” you sighed, raking your nails across Eddie’s back. Even through his shirt, it’d leave a mark.
Eddie moaned against your lips, nodding in agreement. He had a familiar goofy look on his face; the one he always made right before he came.
At least some things never changed.
cherry on top - an eddie munson one shot
can be read as a solo one shot but exists as part 2 to chemistry
Summary: good girl!Y/N and Eddie continue working on their chemistry assignment the next day after school. things are going well but Eddie starts to get too close. It's one thing to talk about college or music but Y/N nearly draws the line at sex and drugs?
A/N: this chapter sort of features a latina!reader, mainly just a few cultural references but for the most part is general. yall it got a little real writing this and i definitely tapped into my inner teenager this time around but hopefully it resonates with someone
cw: mentions of sex, mentions of drugs, cursing, angst, fluff, romance
“Let’s go,” Eddie swings the jingling keys in his hand. He sits up from the bench and ventures into the parking lot as Y/N follows. She clutches the straps of her backpack in her hands and looks around.
“Afraid someone will see us,” Eddie asks as he looks over his shoulder at her.
“You look nervous,” he says as he slows his stride to walk next to her.
“I’m not,” Y/N lies. She’s not nervous to be seen with him, she’s nervous to be in a car with him. She’s especially nervous because up until today, she had never really spoken to Eddie or really had any one on one time with it.
But that’s not the only reason she’s nervous. She’s nervous because she’s never been alone in a car with a boy before, not like this at least. She’s been in cars with groups of people for volunteer events with the honor society, but that hardly even counts.
Y/N has to remind herself that he’s just giving her a ride home. It’s no more than a five minute drive away, and yet, the thought has Y/N’s nerves on red alert.
Y/N sees a bulky and scratched up van at the far corner of the parking lot and instantly identifies it as the old yet lovable van Eddie described. Eddie leads her to the passenger side and opens the door for her. Y/N looks at him quizzically before shaking her head and thanking him. He slaps the van door shut and walks off to the other side, hair bouncing in his stride. He climbs into the driver's seat and feels around the car floor between their seats.
“Listen Y/N, I only have one rule when it comes to the van okay?” He swirls his body around the seat and uses his hand to search the floor beneath the back seat. Y/N’s throat dries as she sees Eddie’s neck crane. As his long locks remain tucked behind his shoulder, the view of the bare skin and protruding vein of his neck mock her.
“And that rule is that while I’m in the driver's seat, I get to pick the music.”
“Oh, sure,” Y/N shrugs meekly.
“Aha! Here it is,” he grins and his eyes move from the tape in his hand to Y/N’s eyes.
“Now this, this is real music,” he says with a glint in his eye as he inserts the tape into the deck. He puts the key in the ignition and starts the car. It sputters for a bit before the engine roars to life.
“It’s a good day if she’s sounding like this,” Eddie wiggles his eyebrows at Y/N before backing out of the parking space. Y/N nods and pulls the backpack in her lap closer to her chest.
“You can put that on the floor if you want.”
“Um, it’s ok, I’m fine like this,” Y/N softly replies and looks out the window.
“Okay… Well, while we’re partners for this assignment, you’re probably gonna have a lot to teach me about chemistry so I figure I’ll return the favor and teach you about heavy metal. What do you say, huh? Are you ready for a rock education, a rock-ification if you will?”
“Huh?” Eddie’s train of thought takes Y/N for a spin. She lands on the thought that it makes no sense how Eddie can be so edgy and so much of a dork all at the same time.
“I imagine you’re probably up in your bedroom studying to Beethoven and what not, so you’ve probably never heard of this band before but this is Black Sabbath.”
“I’ve heard of Black Sabbath, Eddie.”
Eddie’s eyes widen and he looks over at Y/N briefly before turning his eyes back on the road.
“You can make a right here.” Y/N points with her index finger at the light they’re approaching.
“You know Black Sabbath?”
“Sure, I mean, they’re not exactly a new band. They’re pretty famous.”
He looks quizzically at Y/N from the corner of his eye. “Still, I didn’t think you would.”
Y/N rolls her eyes. “Of course you would think that. You know, for someone who’s quick to be judged by others, I’m surprised how quick you are to judge me. And newsflash, I don’t have to listen to an artist’s music to know they exist, Eddie.”
Eddie bites his tongue for a moment. Even though they hardly know each other, he shouldn’t be surprised that Y/N’s heard things about him. He hopes she doesn’t believe half the things people have to say about him. And yet, she speaks as though she doesn’t. Like she would rather get to know you first and then make a fair judgment.
“Fair enough.” Eddie clicks his tongue. “So what kind of stuff do you listen to?”
“You can make a left on Deer Street,” Y/N instructs. “Um, I like a lot of different artists. I like Whitney Houston, Tears for Fears, Prince, The Cure, Michael Jackson, Queen, stuff like that.”
“Ehh, I guess I can work with that,” Eddie says reluctantly while tilting his hand back and forth.
“Is Black Sabbath all you listen to?” Y/N asks innocently.
“No. I also like Ozzy Osbourne who was actually a member of Black Sabbath at one point but I’d say his solo career counts. I also like Metallica too. Honestly anything heavy metal or rock is good in my book.”
Y/N nods and as one song transitions to the next, Y/N instantly recognizes the chord progression and straightens her posture. “Wait, I do know this song.”
“Yeah. I don’t know what it’s called but I’ve definitely heard it before.” Eddie rolls to a stoplight and he looks over at Y/N.
“Where have you heard Iron Man by Black Sabbath?” His tongue swipes across his bottom lip. Y/N’s attention is drawn to the red plushness of his mouth and forces herself to move her gaze back to his eyes.
“Um,” Y/N squirms under his intense gaze. “I’m pretty sure from my dad’s garage.”
Eddie jerks his head when the car behind him honks. He turns his attention back to the road and drives.
Eddie is silent for another moment and the track moves on to the next.
“Your dad listens to metal music and you don’t? How can that be? I don’t know where I’d be if I hadn’t gotten my love of music from my old man.”
“I don’t know! It’s fine, I guess. I just like other stuff more. Take a right here.” Y/N watches his dexterous ring clad fingers swirl around the steering wheel and gulps.
“Keep hanging round me and I promise you’ll be a full blown metal head, like throw your panties on stage at a Metallica concert metalhead.”
“Eddie,” Y/N squeals and widens her eyes. She brings her palms to cover her face and Eddie catches a patch of red forming along her neck.
“What? Goody two-shoes Y/N isn’t throwing her panties on stage for anyone?”
“Ugh! One, you’re crude, and two, there’s no way I’m ever doing that. And if somehow I did get possessed by some supernatural entity that takes over my judgment and makes me throw my… undergarments on stage for someone it definitely wouldn’t be for Metallica. Luis Miguel maybe, but–”
“Luis Miguel? Who the hell is that?”
“He’s only the hottest man alive,” Y/N gushes and Eddie furrows his eyebrows.
“Sorry,” Y/N giggles, “He’s a famous Mexican pop star. Keep going straight after the stop sign.”
“Why haven’t I ever heard of him before?”
“Probably because they only play his music on the Spanish radio stations. But knowing you, even if they did play him on the English stations I doubt you’d find him that way.”
“Hm. Do you have any of his tapes?”
“Sure, but they’re at home.”
“Ok well bring one tomorrow and I’ll let you listen to him.”
Y/N quirks an eyebrow at him. “You’ll let me listen to him? Wow, I feel so special.”
“You should! I don’t even let Dustin play his Oingo Boingo crap in here.”
“Dustin… that freshman you hang out with?”
“Yes, the freshman I hang out with. Don’t say that like it’s a bad thing. I’m telling you, those kids give me hope for the next generation of Hawkins.”
“Whatever,” Y/N rolls her eyes.
“I’m serious though. Bring your tape and I’ll give him a listen.”
“I don’t think you’ll like him. His stuff is pretty pop-y and it’s all in Spanish.”
“Maybe that’ll make it more tolerable than the stuff that’s in English.”
Y/N gives him a skeptical look.
“Just humor me Y/N, I’m curious.”
“If you say so,” Y/N huffs as she gathers her backpack.
“My house is on the left, the one with the white car.” Eddie continues to drive past her house then pulls into her neighbors driveway to make a U-turn.
“So let’s go over the plan for tomorrow.” Y/N says as he parks the van. Eddie groans.
“C’mon, we’ll need a plan of attack.”
“Okay, whaddya got?” Eddie says as he moves the gear shift to park.
“I was thinking we could meet right after school. I’m not sure where we should go to study though. The library is obviously off limits and in all honesty, so is my house.”
“No offense, but,” Eddie scans his eyes over the two story colonial, “Your house seems pretty fine to me.”
“Um, It’s not that. It’s just…It’s my parents, actually. I’m not allowed to have any boys over.” Y/N chews her lip nervously. Eddie tries to brush aside the thought that the nervous look on her face makes her look so undeniably hot.
“Not even for some innocent studying? It’s not like I’m asking to be locked alone with you in your bedroom.” Y/N eyes widen and cheeks redden at his words.
“What?” Eddie raises his eyebrows innocently.
Y/N viciously shakes her head. “You don’t understand Eddie. My parents won’t allow it, no exceptions. You could be my bestfriends boyfriend coming to pick her up at a birthday party where its only other girls and my parents would still blow up about it.”
“Wait, that was too specific. Did that actually happen?” Eddie stifles a laugh.
“Yes! Well, not to me, but to my older sister, yeah. My parents gave it to her something awful that night, while the party was still going on! Everybody went home right after that, but still. No boy can be worth that wrath.”
Eddie is shocked to hear this. He doesn’t have any sisters or female friends, but he’s seen tv shows and movies with daughters and their over protective dads. He didn’t think that sort of thing actually happened. What’s even more shocking is just how much Y/N is willing to live within the confines of that outrageous rule. It’s obvious she wouldn’t even think of going behind their back, for anything. She’s content with compliance. It’s the opposite of everything he’s ever lived by.
“Your parents are really strict. My uncle could care less about what I do, as long as I make it home alive and not in jail.”
Y/N almost wants to say he’s lucky, but she bites her tongue. Eddie’s lucky that his family isn’t strict, but based on the things she's heard about him, she doubts he’s lucky in a lot of other aspects. The thought tugs on her heart strings a bit.
“Yeah, um… It must be nice not having to worry so much.” Eddie shrugs.
“Well anyway, the point still stands that I don’t know where else in town we can go to get some proper studying done.”
“We could go to Frankie’s,” Eddie’s eyebrows raise.
“Yeah! You know, the diner on Main Street.”
“Oh yeah… we could do that. I’ll have to be home by 7:00 though, so that should give us a few hours to get things done.”
“Your curfew is 7:00? Why so early?”
“It’s a school night? What do you mean?”
“I mean it just seems kind of early, even for a school night.”
“Well, that’s when my family has dinner,” Y/N shrugs nonchalantly.
He jerks his head back slightly. Is her family the Brady Bunch? “You have dinner with your family?”
“Yeah? You say that like it’s a weird thing.” She looks at him skeptically.
“Well, it is weird, to me at least. Back home, it’s just me and my uncle. He works nights at the plant so uh, I don't really have anyone waiting up on me.”
“Oh,” is all Y/N says but she really wishes she could say more. She wishes she could tell him that the thought of him eating alone every night makes her feel sad. She almost feels compelled to invite him over for dinner but could never bring herself to actually do it. Not only do they not know each other well enough to be doing that sort of thing, but bringing a boy home is just out of the question. Maybe in another life.
Her eyes lower and she peers back up at Eddie, leaning over her seat. Eddie leans over his own seat to look into Y/N’s eyes.
“I’ll see you tomorrow. Okay?”
“Okay,” Eddie softly whispers, the silence in his van deafening.
Y/N climbs out of the van and speed walks to her front door. She looks over her shoulder and sees Eddie still parked, waiting for her to enter the home. She painfully smiles and unlocks the door. She opens it and walks through. When she looks through the living room window, his van is already long gone. She sighs in exasperation.
Y/N walks into the kitchen and sees her older sister and mother shuffling around the small space.
“Y/N, you’re home,” her mother greets. She walks over and gives Y/N a hug and kiss.
“Hey mom,” Y/N says with a smile. She greets her sister and walks over to the pantry.
“No snacks, Y/N. Dinner’s almost ready and your father should be here any minute now,” her mom declares as she glances at the watch on her wrist.
“Okay,” Y/N responds glumly.
“How did your studying go?” Y/N’s mom asks. During lunch, Y/N made a call to her mom on the school’s pay phone letting her know she’d be out late.
“It was good.”
“And this is for which class?”
“Chemistry,” Y/N answers and her mom nods.
“The assignment is due on Friday so we’ll probably be meeting for the rest of the week to get it done.”
“That’s fine, just remember to be home by seven okay?”
“Okay,” Y/N nods and her sister smirks and raises her eyebrows. Y/N hopes she doesn’t suspect anything but the conversation they have after dinner confirms otherwise.
“Who is it?”
“The boy you’re sneaking off to see?”
“Don’t act dumb. I saw him drop you off. You’re lucky mom didn’t see.”
Y/N shakes her head. “It’s not like that. He’s just my partner for this assignment.”
“Whatever you say Y/N,” her sister walks away nonchalantly.
Y/N isn’t doing anything bad, but she can’t help the guilty feeling that pangs in her chest. She'll need to be careful hanging around Eddie. She’s used to hiding things from her parents. Like how she loves to draw or that she likes the way she looks in red lipstick. There’s certain things in this world that they’ll never need to know about her, and Eddie Munson is now one of them.
“He should’ve been here fifteen minutes ago,” Y/N huffs worriedly as she looks up from her watch to the view of Eddie strutting his way over along with the other members of the Hellfire club. He smiles and says something to them before walking in Y/N’s direction. The other boys cast their gaze from Eddie to Y/N and it makes her want to crawl out of skin.
“Hey Y/N,” he smirks and flickers his eyes up and down her body. “How’s my smarty pants doing today?”
Y/N didn’t expect it, but she had been looking forward to seeing Eddie today, that is until he disrespected her perfectly crafted schedule.
“You’re late,” Y/N scowls at him. “Let’s go.”
Y/N storms off and paces quickly to Eddie’s van, which to her luck is parked in the same spot it was the day before.
Eddie jogs to catch up with her. “Wait, Y/N. Relax. I’m here now aren’t I?”
“Eddie, the later you show up, the less time we have to work on this. You know I have an early curfew.”
“Like I said, I’m here now.”
“I don’t care. We agreed on 4:00 not 4:15. It’s called making a commitment Eddie.”
“C’mon it was just a few minutes. We’ll still have plenty of time.”
Y/N swiftly turns around and plants her feet on the ground. Eddie almost bumps into her but stops just a few inches away.
“You wasted my time Eddie and I didn’t like that very much. It was very inconsiderate of you to make me wait like that when we both agreed to meet at 4:00. Don’t ever make me wait again.”
Y/N spins on her heel and walks to the passenger side and climbs in the van, leaving Eddie stunned. The sound of her slamming the door shut brings Eddie back to earth and he rushes over to the driver’s side. Y/N huffs as she roughly puts on her seatbelt and slumps in the seat.
It all happened so fast, but Eddie couldn’t ignore the strange feeling he got when Y/N commanded him like that. Why was her strong tone and the assertive look on her face so attractive?
Eddie climbs in the van and puts on his seatbelt. He puts the key in the ignition and starts the car. Y/N runs a hand through her hair and leans her head against the headrest.
“Do you have that Luis Miguel tape?”
She turns to face him without moving her head from the headrest and looks at him with confusion.
“Do you have the tape I told you to bring? You know, that Mexican pop singer you like?”
Y/N blinks in confusion. “You were serious about that?”
“I may not take a lot of things seriously, but music is one of the few things I do.” Eddie explains as he looks around for a tape on the van floor.
“Oh, I didn’t bring it. I didn’t think you actually meant it.”
“Of course I meant it.”
Y/N shakes her head and frowns. She genuinely didn’t think Eddie cared, but knowing that he does, makes her heart feel heavy.
“That’s alright, we’ll just continue our rock-ification,” Eddie declares, hoping it would make Y/N laugh. Y/N only exhales as she leans her arm on the armrest and rests her chin in her palm and stares out the window. Eddie retrieves a random tape among the collection of scattered tapes on his van floor and puts it into the deck. When the music starts playing, it blares at the normal volume he keeps it at, but he lowers the volume out of consideration for Y/N.
Eddie pulls out of the parking lot and heads towards the diner. Y/N’s position hasn’t changed and he starts to get worried.
“Hey, Y/N,” he briefly looks over at her before returning his focus to the road, “I'm sorry for being late. I just caught up with some of the Hellfire guys, you know?”
“It’s whatever,” Y/N glumly responds, barely moving her mouth.
A moment passes and a silence falls on them. It makes Eddie uncomfortable and concerned for Y/N.
“You okay? You seem a little more than just pissed off at me for being late.”
“Just got a lot on my mind I guess.” Y/N mumbles.
Eddie reaches a stop light and presses on the break. He looks at her with concern and confusion. He doesn't talk to girls very often, especially not when they're in a state like this. He’s in uncharted territory but attempts to tread lightly.
“Do you, um… want to talk about it?”
“Not really,” Y/N replies and he sighs in relief. Eddie figures they can make it to the diner in silence and once they’re eating something there, she’ll feel better.
His theory proves true when they make it to Frankie’s and sit in a booth in the farthest corner of the place. When the waitress gives them their menus, Y/N’s eyes light up as she scans it. When the waitress comes by to take their orders, Eddie orders a vanilla milkshake first and Y/N looks at him puzzled before ordering a chocolate milkshake.
“So you’re a vanilla guy?” She asks once the waitress leaves.
“You’re a vanilla guy. You ordered a vanilla milkshake.” Y/N declares as she starts pulling her notebooks and pencils from her backpack.
“Trust me sweetheart, I may have ordered a vanilla milkshake but I’m far from vanilla.” Eddie’s sexual innuendo goes over her head and she continues to press the topic.
“I don’t know, I just feel like the last thing I would’ve expected you to want is a vanilla milkshake. You seem more like a strawberry guy at least.”
“Well my friend, all I can say is to expect the unexpected,” Eddie shrugs and Y/N quirks her eyebrow before turning her concentration to their assignment. They’re both able to work in silence and pure focus for a good ten minutes until the waitress brings out their drinks.
Y/N smiles at the glass before her and it feels like a victory for Eddie. In the same moment, Eddie and Y/N each take a sip of their drinks, but Y/N looks up at Eddie first. She sees his eyelids closed and admires the way his eyelashes frame each lid. When he feels her looking at him, he peers up at her through the long lashes and it makes Y/N almost choke on her drink.
She covers it up by clearing her throat and asks, “How’s your drink Mr. Vanilla.”
“You tell me,” he says, pushing the glass across the table. She looks from the drink to Eddie and back to the drink. She takes the straw out of her own drink and holds it in midair when Eddie shouts, “What’re you doing?”
“I’m trying your drink?”
“Don’t use your straw, you weirdo! It’ll mix the flavors. Just drink from mine.”
The thought hadn’t even occurred to her. Somehow it feels extremely intimate to be putting her mouth in a place where Eddie’s once was.
“What? You afraid you’re gonna get my cooties?”
“Ugh,” Y/N cringes and bites the bullet. She takes a sip and shrugs.
“It’s alright. Not as good as mine though.”
Eddie grabs her drink before she can even realize and takes a sip. He groans and slowly unravels his puckered lips from the straw. The sight and sound are enough to make Y/N’s mouth water.
“That’s so good. I might start converting to chocolate,” Eddie nods and moves Y/N’s glass closer to her.
“Ha ha, yeah,” Y/N forcefully replies, thanking the universe he can’t hear her thoughts or loudly beating heart.
Eddie takes the cherry on top of his milkshake and tilts his head back. He dangles the cherry above his mouth. His tongue slightly sticks out and he slowly wraps his lips around the juicy red fruit, pulling it from its stem.
Y/N swears he’s doing this on purpose. He’s putting on a show. Is he doing it to entertain her or entice her? Quite possibly. But more than anything, she knows he does it to see if it has an effect on her. To see if it makes her squirm in the best way possible. She won’t give him the satisfaction.
She looks down at the cherry atop her own milkshake and offers it to him.
“Do you want mine?” Y/N asks aloofly as she scoops out the cherry with her spoon and holds it out to him.
“You askin’ me if I want your cherry?” He teases with a quirked eyebrow and extremely direct eye contact.
“Don’t be weird about it Munson,” she responds in annoyance as she avoids his gaze and transfers the cherry to his glass.
The two return to working on their assignment. There’s a few periods of actual concentration and progress punctuated by the occasional question or thought from Eddie.
“Do you think a hurricane would ever come to Hawkins?” Eddie asks.
Without looking up from her paper, Y/N responds with a simple, “No.”
“Why not? You never know what could happen.”
“Actually we do know. Hurricanes can only happen in coastal areas. The only thing Hawkins is on the coast of is suburban boredom and everlasting cornfields.”
Y/N’s annoyed remark brings a bubble of laughter to Eddie’s body. The sound is sweet yet foreign to Y/N’s ears. Her cheeks heat at the realization that her snarky comment made him laugh.
“You know you’re secretly funny,” he comments with subtle adoration as he brings his jean jacket clad arms to rest against the table.
“Yeah? And you’re, not so secretly, annoying. Now let’s get back to work.”
Eddie is prepared to say something sarcastic back but Y/N’s attention is laser focused on the paper before her. He takes in the sight of her: A studious girl in her natural environment. Tendrils of hair sneak out of her pulled back bun. She has papers, pencils, and folders scattered about. His attention is caught on a folder with a title written in marker that says, “College Applications”. He wonders what colleges she’s applying to or what she’d want to study. He almost asks her but looks at her and sees how focused she is. It’s surprisingly adorable to him.
He decides to turn his own attention to the assignment at hand. He has a good feeling he’ll have plenty of time to learn these things about her later. A good 20-30 minutes passes without interruption when Eddie’s thoughts begin to trail off again.
“Why do I have to learn about atoms and molecules?”
“Huh?” Y/N zones out of her lazer focus.
“It just seems so unimportant in the grand scheme of things. There’s so many problems in the world, chemicals seem like the least of my worries”
“Well, that doesn’t make them not important Eddie. There’s a lot of applications of chemistry to real life. Just think of it like this, people have to understand atoms and molecules in order to make the guitars your favorite musicians play or all the pyrotechnics and stage effects at their concerts.”
“Yeah, but they can worry about that. Why should I?” Eddie replies, dazed at the thought.
“Hm, maybe that wasn’t a good example. Try thinking of it like this. There’s a lot of chemistry involved in your inventory.”
Eddie quirks an eyebrow.
“I may not be a customer, but word gets around Munson.”
“Fair enough,” Eddie nods his head to the side.
“Anyways, even though you’re not the one making it, the slightest change in a compound's chemical makeup can alter the substance itself and thereby the effect it has on the person using it.”
“Hm, how can I put this? Imagine you’re learning how to play a song on the guitar. You see the sheet music, read the notes and play it on the guitar. Well what if you changed one note or a few notes. You change an a-chord to a c-chord or an eighth note to a quarter note. Something random and seemingly miniscule. Is it still the same song?”
Eddie raises an eyebrow. “Wait, how do you know so much about music?”
“I know a lot about a lot of things, Munson. But back to my question-”
“Answer mine first.” Eddie holds Y/N’s gaze with a severity she’s never seen before. He really is passionate about music. Y/N almost deflects his questions, but can tell he wants to know more than anything.
“I, uh, used to play the piano.”
“Do you still play?”
“No. I only learned for a few years in middle school”
Eddie contemplates her answer. He’s gonna put this out there and it’s a long shot she’ll even accept, but he won’t know until he tries. “If you ever want to learn how to play the guitar, I can teach you.”
“Sure,” she shrugs, “Back to what I was saying, if you changed a single or couple of notes, would it be the same song?”
It’s not a denial but it’s not a complete acceptance either. It’s a start though. And before Eddie can even start daydreaming about what it would be like to wrap his arms around Y/N as he helps her pluck the strings on one of his guitars, she snaps him out of it.
“Did you even hear me?”
“Yeas,” he lies.
“Ok, what did I say?”
“Something about chemistry?” He smiles tryingly.
“I’m kidding Y/N, relax. And to answer your question, no they’re not the same songs. You can hear the difference in that one note change.”
Y/N looks up and beams, instantly forgetting her frustration. “Exactly!”
“And sometimes in chemistry, that one minor note change, so to speak, can make a really big difference. Just look at coal and a diamond. Chemically they’re nearly identical, but physically, they couldn’t be more different,” Y/N explains, pointing to an open page in her textbook showing the chemical formulas and pictures for coal and diamonds.
“Holy shit that’s trippy,” Eddie’s eyebrows raise.
“See, it’s not all boring.”
“Not if you have the right teacher,” Eddie winks up at her and Y/N forces a smile while shaking her head.
‘I’m just the messenger,” she downplays his compliment as she looks down and flips through the pages of her textbook, more as a distraction than to actually turn to a specific page.
“You really like this stuff, huh?”
“Your eyes light up when you talk about it. Probably the same way mine light up when I talk about music.”
“Um, I’m sure that’s not true,” Y/N shyly tucks a strand of hair behind her ear.
Y/N likes chemistry but it’s not her true passion; that would be civil engineering. At least that’s what the Big Book of College Majors tells her. She likes math and drawing so that narrows her prospects to architecture and civil engineering. She feels like it’s too dorky or weird to talk about it with others, so she just plays it off or lies that she’ll be studying economics. No one ever asks questions if you’re an economics major.
“You don’t have to be ashamed, Y/N. I think it’s cool.”
“Well, you’d be one in a million,” Y/N teases.
“I’m okay with those odds,” Eddie proudly says. Y/N avoids his magnetizing eyes and shuffles through the papers on the table.
“Is that what you want to study? In college?” Y/N stops in her tracks and slowly looks up at him. She moves her tongue to the side of her mouth and bites it. She shakes her head and looks away toward the drafts of college essays taunting her from their place in the folder next to her left arm. They’re due in a couple of months and everyday they’re a reminder that gnaws at her brain.
“What do you want to study”
“Um, it’s okay we don’t have to talk about it.” Y/N shyly shakes her head.
“Have you met me? I’m a nineteen year old playing Dungeons and Dragons all day with fourteen year olds, I invented nerdy,” Eddie replies and it makes Y/N full on belly laugh. It shouldn’t have, but the way he said it was undeniably funny.
“You shouldn’t put yourself down like that.”
“That’s not important. What’s important is that I want to know what you’re passionate about,” Eddie says as he looks at her wide-eyed. It’s at this moment that Y/N realizes he’s not just asking her something just because it’s the cordial thing to do or because it’s something about her anyone should know. He’s asking because he genuinely wants to know what it is she likes, what it is that speaks to her heart.
“I… I’m going to be majoring in civil engineering,” Y/N wrinkles her nose as the admission.
“Why do you say it like that? You could be the next Iron Man, or Iron Woman.”
“What?” Y/N shakes her head in confusion.
“You know, Iron Man? Classic American superhero who’s also an engineer? You don’t know about him?”
“Um, not really,” Y/N grumbles.
“God Y/N there’s so many things I need to teach you,” Eddie throws his hands up and Y/N forces herself not to smile at his flustered movements. She also forces herself not to let her thoughts wander to other things Eddie could teach her.
“We can do that later. Let’s just focus on getting this assignment done first, okay?”
“Sure,” Eddie nods.
Around 6:00, the waitress stops by and places a single check in front of Eddie.
Y/N scrambles to search for the wallet in her backpack. By the time she takes it out, Eddie has already put enough cash to cover the bill inside the slot.
“How much was my shake?” Y/N asks as she flips through the dollar bills in her wallet.
“Don’t worry about it,” Eddie says nonchalantly and Y/N freezes and looks up at him. She cocks her head to the side.
“No seriously. Let me see,” she reaches for the check and Eddie grabs it and raises his arm.
“Eddie, just let me pay for my drink.”
“It’s my treat.”
“No it’s not.”
“Yes it is,” Eddie smugly grins at Y/N who’s eyes narrow. “Consider it your lucky day.”
“Eddie, seriously. It’s not a big deal.”
“Exactly, it’s not a big deal. The cost of your milkshake isn’t exactly breaking the bank sweetheart.”
“Y/N, let me pay for your goddamn chocolate shake.”
Y/N breathes out through her nose. “Fine. Next time we come here, drinks are on me.”
“Sure they are,” Eddie says as he places the check back on the table.
“Oh, I know you are,” Eddie taunts.
The waitress comes by to pick up the money and while they wait for her to bring Eddie’s change, Y/N reviews their progress.
“I’d say today was pretty productive, wouldn’t you?”
“Beats being in the library.”
Y/N looks at her watch and marvels at the time.“We even have some time to spare.”
“So, about tomorrow, I’m going to need a raincheck for Thursday. On Wednesday’s I have a meeting with the honor society and a tutoring session after school.”
“You’re in tutoring?” Eddie asks incredulously.
Y/N laughs and says, “No, silly. I’m the tutor. I help Ms. Callaghan with the juniors in algebra two.”
“God, I hate algebra two.”
“What? I loved algebra two, it was so much fun. ”
“Fun? You think math is fun? And people have the nerve to call me a freak?”
“Calm down, Munson. Math is fun. It’s like solving a puzzle.”
“Even worse,” he shudders. “Anyway, tomorrow’s no good for me either. Got a massive campaign with the Hellfire club.”
“Okay,” Y/N nods and pens something in her planner.
Eddie leans over to see what she’s writing down. “You’re real Type A, huh?”
“What?” Y/N looks up from her notes and leans back from his close proximity.
He gestures towards the planner and pen in her hand. “You’re a straight-A student who’s always gotta be on time, you’re super organized, and you even have a math fetish.”
“Oh my god Eddie! Are you insane? All I said was that math is fun. I highly doubt that makes it a,” she looks around before she whispers her next word, “fetish.”
“I don’t know Y/N,” Eddie says in a sing-song way. “Lot’s of people’s fetishes are for things they think are fun.”
“I-I don’t even know what to say to that,” Y/N stutters as she shakes her head. Eddie smiles at the splotches of red coating her cheeks and the tips of her ears. He can see the gears turning in her head at the thought of his words.
The waitress brings back the change and Eddie pockets it. Y/N puts the rest of her belongings in her bag and looks at Eddie who shoves the loose leaf pieces of paper into his.
“You ready?” He asks calmly, casually, as if going to get milkshakes and study at the local dinner is something they do often.
Y/N nods and they slide out of the booth. When they reach the exit, Y/N keeps walking to the van but Eddie calls out her name to stop her.
“We still have some time before you have to go home right?”
Y/N looks at her watch and it's 6:23. “Yeah.”
“What do you say to a celebratory smoke?” Eddie asks, but it’s a rhetorical question because he’s already pulled out a carton of cigarettes from his jean jacket pocket and a lighter has miraculously appeared in his other hand. He lights up and takes a puff before Y/N can say anything. She freezes a good couple of feet away from his body that’s leaned effortlessly against the wall of the red-brick building.
He takes another drag and then offers it to her. She looks from the cigarette to him, a confused look on her face.
“Eddie, are you crazy? If I go home smelling like cigarette smoke, my parents are going to kill me.”
“Relax, Y/N you’re not going to go home smelling like cigarette smoke.”
He takes another drag and exhales the smoke, making Y/N cough.
“Yes I will. Look I’m just gonna wait in the van while you finish up and pray to God my parents don’t say anything when I get home.”
Y/N holds out her hand for Eddie to give her the keys, but he decides to forfeit altogether. He shakes her hand away and puts the cigarette out. When he stomps on the cigarette, the chain hanging from the belt loops of his pants jingles slightly.
“Fine, we won’t do that, but can we at least drive around a bit?” Eddie asks as he makes his way over to the van. The two get inside the car and Eddie starts it.
“I don’t want to go home yet.” Eddie says casually, but Y/N picks up on what he doesn’t say. That he’d rather be out anywhere else than at his house. The thought weighs on Y/N but she tries to let it go.
“Fine, but remember I have to be home by-”
“7:00, I know,” Eddie replies as he puts in a tape.
“So tell me smarty-pants, you don’t smoke weed or cigarettes,” Eddie places a hand on Y/N’s headrest and looks over his shoulder as he backs out of the parking spot. The combination of that and his newfound nickname for her makes a pool of heat settle in Y/N’s stomach. “Tell me you at least drink.”
“Not that it matters, but um, yes I have.”
“Really?” He looks over at her and smiles. “Care to explain?”
Now, Y/N doesn’t owe Eddie an explanation for anything, but something inside her wants to. She likes that he wants to know her, that he tries to understand her. Despite not having known him long, she feels comfortable around him even though she doesn’t really know why.
“Um, sometimes at family parties, late at night when all our aunts and uncles are drunk, they’ll let my cousins and I take a tequila shot with them. It tastse horrible, even with the lime and salt, but it’s kind of fun to do it with them.”
“That’s badass,” Eddie riles as he looks over at Y/N with a sensational grin and she shrugs, playing off the happiness she feels at his perception of her. “Have you ever been drunk before?”
“Not even tipsy?”
“I don’t know. I guess it just hasn’t happened yet. Alcohol tastes terrible so there’s not really an incentive for me to drink enough of it to be intoxicated.”
Eddie’s eyebrows furrow in concentration and he remains silent for a moment. It’s simultaneously sexy and annoying when she speaks so formally like that. Eddie thinks, would it kill her to just say I don’t like drinking enough to get drunk?
“What?” Y/N breaks the silence.
“Yeah but everyone hates the taste of alcohol at first. Then you get used to it and it starts to get fun.”
“I don’t think drinking or doing any kind of drug could ever be fun, for me.”
Eddie’s in shock at her words. Who their age talks like that? Is she a walking D.A.R.E campaign?
“Are you being serious?”
Eddie pauses for a moment before saying, “I just have a hard time understanding how someone could not like any type of smoking or drinking”
“We exist, okay? God, you make it sound like it’s the worst thing ever. You know, if there were more people like me, the world would probably be a much better place,” Y/N replies defensively.
Eddie contemplates her words for a moment. The light he approaches turns red and he presses his foot on the brake pedal. He runs a hand through his hair and the sound of his denim jacket rustling can be heard. The silence eats at Y/N and she’s worried her words might have insulted him. She only meant to defend herself, not to offend him. She opens her mouth to say something when Eddie beats her to it.
“Just, tell me this. Do you genuinely not like it? Or are you just afraid of what your parents would say?”
Y/N’s caught completely off guard at his question. She looks outside the window and tries to regain her composure by concentrating on the rush of buildings they pass.
Eddie’s words hit her right in the chest, so hard it almost hurts. He’s right, but he shouldn’t be. How could he have made that connection so quickly? Even before she had? Is she that easy to figure out? Is she that pathetic that others can see it so vividly when all she can do is unconsciously turn a blind eye to it?
Y/N can feel her eyes start to water and heat spread through her chest. She reaches into an ever diminishing reservoir of strength to fight the tears threatening to form at her eyes.
She should not be reacting this way. She shouldn’t be feeling so triggered over such a small observation. And yet, this small observation is one that has defined her entire life. There’s so many things she’s never done or would even think to do in fear of their repercussions. And for someone like Eddie who’s probably never lived this way to see this quality in her makes her feel pathetic.
“Maybe a bit of both?” he softly asks as he looks over at her when they reach another stoplight. Y/N nods and looks into her lap. Eddie senses her discomfort and opens his mouth to say something reassuring.
“There’s also another reason too,” she says softly before he can say anything.
“Yeah?” Eddie replies softly, sensing her apprehension.
“Yeah…Even if I did like it, or even if I didn’t care what my parents thought, one of the biggest reasons I avoid that stuff is because… I’m afraid.”
“What are you afraid of?”
Y/N looks up and sees the last of the sun’s light as it sets beyond the trees in the horizon. It leaves trails of hot bright orange and crimson streaks in the sky. It reminds her of the way her cheeks feel in this moment when she feel’s uncovered, almost naked in front of him.
It’s easy to lie to your friends or your family that you don’t smoke or drink because you don’t want to get caught or because you don’t like it or some other plausible excuse. But it’s harder to tell people that you’re afraid of what it might do to you. Of how it might change you.
It’s not that big of a deal to most people, but Y/N can’t change the fact that it is to her. It’s hard for her not to take things so seriously. For everyone else, smoking or drinking comes easily to them, but for her, it’s really difficult.
“I just…Even though it seems like everyone does it and it's celebrated by society as this thing we all naturally want to do, I don’t. It’s temporary fun for the moment, but after the fact? I see the effect it has on people and… And I don’t want to subject myself to that.”
“What do you mean?” Eddie asks in confusion.
“When people are drunk or high, they feel good but they… they also lose all sense of control and I couldn’t bear to do that to myself. I couldn’t stand the idea of having no control over my thoughts or my words or my actions. And just imagine what would happen if I was surrounded by the wrong people or in an unsafe environment? It would be really bad and just… I need to be in control…it's all I have.”
Eddie frowns and notices a furrow in Y/N’s eyebrows. For the first time he sees it so clearly. Y/N may be a goody two-shoes girl on the road to college and a perfect life, but she herself is far from perfect. She’s just like anyone else, but under way too much pressure; both from her parents and mostly from herself. She works tirelessly to maintain this illusion of perfection and it's causing so much tension in her; tension he wishes he could help her release.
Eddie wants to do something or say something that would make her feel better but he doesn’t know what. She seems so vulnerable and exposed to him, but not at all weak. There’s a strength in her conviction that even she doesn’t see, but he does.
He wants to let her know that what she feels is okay. In fact, it’s more than okay. There’s nothing wrong with being afraid or not wanting to do something just because everyone says you should; he knows that better than anyone.
At the same time, he also wants her to understand that being in control is an illusion. There’s much more things in life we don’t have control over than the things we do have control over. If she doesn’t feel that way about drugs is one thing, but she needs to know realistically, there will be other things she won’t be able to control and that it’ll still be okay.
He wants to gently say something philosophical or even poetic to get his point across, but Y/N makes him too nervous. He ends up relying on his good old Munson instincts and says something much more provocative than it is profound.
Eddie looks at Y/N through his peripheral vision then calmly asks, “Have you ever had sex before?”
Y/N chokes and starts uncontrollably coughing. “What?”
“I said, have you ever had sex before?” Eddie says in a controlled voice.
“Please don’t say that with the same casual demeanor of someone asking, ‘Have you ever been to Mount Rushmore before?’”
Eddie turns the corner into Y/N’s neighborhood and she instantly feels a wave of sadness; one she doesn’t really understand. She also wonders why he’s asking her this, especially so close to her house.
“It’s a simple question Y/N,” Eddie says nonchalantly.
“No it’s not and you know it. And it’s not one I’m going to answer either,” Y/N huffs and points her nose up in the air.
“Looks like you already did,” Eddie smirks at her, teasing her to lighten the moment which works as Y/N’s eyes almost pop out of their sockets. She’s even cuter when he gets a rise out of her like that.
“Eddie! Why are we even talking about this” Y/N says completely flustered.
“Because there’s a point to it and because it’s important to talk about. Even if it’s not with me, I hope you’re talking about it with someone.”
Eddie is walking a line right now and he knows it, but he somehow also knows how to stay within that line too. He’s right and Y/N knows this but she won’t admit it. Sex isn’t something she talks about or knows a lot about. Sure her friends talk about it and Y/N will pretend like she can keep up with the conversation, but deep down, she doesn’t understand what they’re talking about half the time. She knows so much about calculus, chemistry, and college applications, but she just doesn’t understand what the big deal is about sex.
“All I’m saying is, anyone who’s had sex before knows that sometimes, there’s moments in this life where you’re left with no choice but to give up a sense of control. It can be scary, sure, but when you finally let go of that, it can give you the most satisfying and freeing feeling in the world.”
Y/N scowls at him in confusion.
“It’s easy for you to say something like that. You’d never have to worry about getting pregnant or disappointing people that matter to you.”
Eddie arrives at Y/N’s house and parks the car. By now, the street lights have come on and are the only thing illuminating the space before them. Eddie shifts in his seat to face Y/N. The golden lamps cast a glow across the hollow planes of his cheeks.
“Y/N, for a second, I want you to block out the rest of the world; all its people and consequences. It’s just you and your desires.”
Y/N gulps and she swears Eddie is slowly moving toward her. She’s frozen in her body as Eddie continues and says, “You need to know that you’re allowed to be sexual. And, you’re allowed to not only experience but enjoy pleasure. It’s what makes us human.”
Y/N blinks rapidly and focuses her concentration on his big brown eyes. His bangs are getting so long they threaten to drape over his eyes like the curtains at a theater. His full lips curl and tighten with every syllable he speaks. Y/N’s breath is caught in her throat so she reminds herself to breathe but it ends up being shallow.
“Okay?” Eddie asks, confirming that she’s listening to him. She nods slightly which is more than she thought she’d be capable of. She feels paralyzed in her body and her mind.
Where is this coming from? Why is he telling her this? Why do his words stir something in her body that she can’t even begin to explain because she’s never felt them before? How did one of her deepest darkest secrets get brought to the surface, exposed by none other than Eddie Munson?
And yet, he’s not judging her. He’s not making fun of her or thinking she’s weird for it. He’s helping her. But why? He pried this thing out of her, uncovering something that would make most run for the hills. But he… he has her heart on a silver platter and is protecting it? He’s treating it with the utmost care.
“If you ever want a safe space with someone you trust,” he emphasizes every other word and locks eyes with Y/N as he slowly and clearly tells her, “to be able to give up control in a way where something good comes from it…”
Eddie doesn’t say it, but he wants Y/N to know that if she ever experiences those urges, he can be a safe place for her to explore those desires. And without saying it, Y/N knows that’s exactly what he means. The thought makes her tremble.
The sound of a car door shutting snaps Y/N out of her paralysis. She sharply inhales and turns over her shoulder and sees that her neighbor just got home.
“I gotta go.” She scrambles to undo her seatbelt and mutters nervously.
“You need to leave. Now. Before my dad gets home and sees you,” She nervously tells him as she jumps out of the car and runs into the house. Another neighbor walks past her house with their dog. The sound of the dog barking puts Y/N on edge even more, but she forgets about it as soon as she runs through the door.
She zooms up the stairs and runs into her room. She softly shuts the door because if she slammed it shut, who knows what fresh hell her mom would give her. She makes a beeline for her closet and collapses to the floor. She closes the door behind her and takes an extremely deep breath in. She wants to cry but now’s not the time. She’ll wait till she takes a shower later so no one can hear her and the hot water will help depuff her eyes so no one suspects a thing after.
She looks at her watch and sees that it's 6:49. She has a good 5-10 minutes before her parents will start to worry. She can make up an excuse that she had to go to the bathroom or briefly check the TV listings to make sure she can tune in on her favorite tv show that will come on later that evening. She’ll come up with something, but for now, all she wants to do is explode.
This is starting to become more than what she bargained for and it's overwhelming. Eddie’s getting too close and Y/N convinces herself she doesn’t like it but in reality it just terrifies her more than anything else. What’s worse is that he knows too much about her and she hardly knows anything about him. She feels helpless and like she doesn’t know what to do which is an even worse position to be in. How could this happen?
When she got partnered up with Eddie Munson, she expected she’d be doing all the work while he only slacked off. Not the most ideal situation, but one she could tolerate and push through till their due date at the end of the week. And soon enough they would get their A and she would never have to deal with him or his Hellfire nonsense ever again.
She didn’t think he would actually pay attention to her and actually do the work if she was patient enough to explain things to him. She didn’t think he would actually want to know about more than just her understanding of chemistry. Hell, she didn’t think he would ever get to know her and have her figured out this early on; she’s known practically everyone in this town all her life and no one’s been able to do that.
She didn’t expect to look forward to seeing him again. She didn’t expect she would replay their conversations in her head before she went to sleep and imagine what other things they might talk about when she saw him next. She didn’t expect to find Eddie charming or endearing. She didn’t expect he would push her buttons or make her laugh. She didn’t expect to feel so safe with him either. Least of all, she didn’t think she would ever find someone who truly understood her, not until Eddie Munson came along.