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#stranger things x ps reader
plus-size-reader · 1 year
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Never Ending Proposals
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Steve Harrington x Plus size!reader
Word Count: 2267 words
Warnings: none 
Summary: Steve really wants to marry the reader, and will NOT give it up but at a certain point, he has to face reality.
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“Steve…no”
“No”
“No Harrington”
“God, what is wrong with you? We are not getting engaged”
With the way you just kept repeating yourself, you were sure that someone was going to have you committed but it wasn’t entirely your fault.
He just wouldn’t drop it.
No matter what you tried to tell him, Steve refused to accept that you weren’t ready to be his wife yet.
You got it, you really did. You had heard his fantasy over and over again, about all the kids and the camper van and all that.
It sounded nice… after you had secure careers and could actually afford a camper full of Harrington's. Until then, you were just going to keep saying no, and it didn’t matter how sweet Steve was, or how much he genuinely meant each proposal.
As far as you were concerned, Steve Harrington was still a child, and so were you. Neither of you had any business getting married or starting a family yet.
Just last week, you’d lost Dustin in the mall, and you were confident he was easier to handle than an infant. At least, you hoped he was, considering how much trouble he caused the two of you all by himself.
How were you supposed to juggle everything you already did on top of marital responsibilities? You couldn’t.
There was no way to feasibly make it work.
Not that your partner saw that as clearly as you did, as evidenced by the fact you were once again talking about it, this time driving down the road.  
“I just think it would be nice, y’know?” Steve hummed, getting that dreamy look in his eye again, even though you’d already shot this particular fantasy down once this week.
You smiled in spite of yourself, enjoying the fact that he’d clearly given the more romantic parts of his plan some decent thought. In every way except the practical, he knew exactly how it would go down if you agreed.
Unfortunately, you had your focus placed firmly in reality, where there was no ring on your finger and you liked it that way-for the time being, at least.
“It would be nice, but we aren’t ready” you reminded, resting back fully against your chair, turning your head to meet his gaze before he returned his to the road.
That wasn’t he wanted to hear.
Part of you felt bad for shooting him down so readily. You understood the sentiment, and it would be a lie to say that his insistence on being with you was romantic but it was also crazy.
If you went through with it now, it would be like playing house. It wouldn’t actually be something you could sustain all on your own, and that was just the marriage part. You were even less ready to be parents.
You didn’t even have reliable parents of your own. You wouldn’t know how to be them.
“Why not? We always make it through, together,” he kept going, muscle memory almost entirely driving him now, as he ran his left hand through his hair, only partially focusing on the road.
From where he was sitting, it made perfect sense.
Sure, getting married young like you were was a little unorthodox, but it wasn’t entirely uncommon, especially in a small town like Hawkins. Besides, if anyone had any hope of making it work, he was sure it was you.
The two of you, getting through things together and making it work, no matter what. That was who you were and who you’d always been, for one another.
Marriage was just a formality.
A way to make it permanent, forever.
“We could definitely handle marriage” Steve shrugged decidedly, taking your silence as as much of an answer as he was going to get for now.
He knew you weren’t ready, but it didn’t bother him. You were worth waiting for and if waiting was what you wanted to do, you would do it.
…but he wasn’t going to stop proposing.
Steve made up his mind. He wanted to marry you more than he’d wanted anything in a long time and he wasn’t about to let you forget it.
Not that you could even dream of something like that.
You were painfully aware of the situation at hand, sometimes to the point that the pressure nearly crushed you. After all, Steve had dated a lot of girls before you, and of all of them, you were the one he chose to propose to and not just once.
He had proposed to you more times than you could keep track of, though the most memorable ones had certainly carved out a place in your mind.
The first time, for example, you and Steve had gone to the park and halfway through your walk, he’d made up his mind, and dropped to his knee right there.
Then there were the most elaborate schemes of all; like the time he’d sent a single slip of paper to your house every day for a month, all with the same proposal penned into the paper in blue ink, or when he’d hidden his grandmother’s diamond in a soda can.
Each and every one was crafted with so much effort and care, and he’d put so much time into every individual moment and detail.
It was a beautiful testament to how much he cared for you, and part of you wanted to say yes.
…but you couldn’t.
Wouldn’t. Not until you knew the time was right.
“We could. But first, we have to handle the video store” you reminded, pressing a soft kiss to Steve’s cheek before ducking out of the car entirely, leaving the man you loved to once again ponder over another failed conversation.
“I can handle the video store” he muttered, content to enjoy another day by your side, even if it was just as your boyfriend.
~
“Hey Steve” you called, rounding the corner to the horror section where he was restocking inventory, finally making up your mind, once and for all.
As endearing as he was, and as genuine as his feelings were for you, something had to change.
The pressure of all this marriage and babies stuff was going to drive you crazy, and you couldn’t feel like he was just constantly waiting for you to say yes, like you were keeping him from the one thing he really wanted.
Like being his girlfriend wasn’t enough anymore.
As soon as he heard your voice, the man stopped dead in his tracks, glancing at you over his shoulder, a huge grin on his handsome face.
“There’s my favorite girl. How were the romantic comedies?” he hummed, referring to the section you’d been assigned for the night.
Right now, it was just the two of you on the floor, given the fact Robin had drawn the short straw and was currently locked in the back room. Normally, that would mean a fair amount of sneaky kisses and misquoted movies, but not tonight.
Tonight, you couldn’t stop thinking about the talk you’d had on your way in and you needed some closure, before you drove yourself crazy.
“They’re fine. I was just thinking and I wanted to run something by you” you tried, watching as Steve immediately put down the box he’d been working on and turned his fullest attention to you, as if there was nothing else in the world.
Which, to be fair, there may has well been, in Steve’s mind.
“Sure, what’s up?”
His words hung in the air for only a moment before you finally blurted out what you’d been thinking about all day, without any of the tact you’d been hoping for.
“I need you to stop proposing to me” You started, slightly panicking now that it was all out in the open. Almost instantly, you felt that weight on your chest, no doubt punishment for crushing whatever happy family dream your boyfriend had for the two of you.
Understandably, there was silence between you for a moment as Steve tried to process what you were telling him.
Thankfully, you stepped in again before he could let his brain run wild with this new information. You wanted to make sure that he understood that you weren’t telling him no forever, or ending things, all you wanted to do was wait a little bit longer.
After all, you had ever intention of marrying him, as soon as you reasonably could.
“I love you, more than anything, and one day, you will be the most amazing husband. I just want to wait a little while longer” you cooed, speaking as quickly as you possibly could.
More silence.
By this point, you were sure that you’d upset him, maybe more than you ever had in the course of your relationship.
There was no way to know for sure considering Steve, the most expressive person you’d ever known, wasn’t actually saying or doing anything.
Until, of course, he did.
All at once, the man you loved was standing in front of you, holding your hands gingerly in his own as if you may actually slip through them if he wasn’t careful.
“What is it? Are you worried about your parents? Or my parents? Is it money? Because I can take more shifts. I’m just saying, I could definitely support you, we can figure it out” Steve assured, squeezing your hands, his face so close to your own that you could see the slight flecks of green in his eyes.
Which, of course, nearly melted you.
While you knew it was a bad idea, it was moments like this that made you want to marry him that much more.
He was so amazing.
You knew that there was nothing Steve wouldn’t do for the people he loved, and somehow you’d found yourself in the middle of that…you were lucky to be in love with him, you knew that.
All you were asking was to be with him, in this moment, instead of constantly yearning for a future that you weren’t prepared for yet.
“It’s none of that. I just can’t handle the pressure of it. I don’t want to feel like I’m letting you down” you sighed, deflating at his earnestness.
You loved him so much, and you just needed that to be enough for now.
Steve nearly scoffed at that before forcing it down. Clearly, even though it made no sense to him, that was how you were feeling and he had no right to take away from that.
“You could never let me down,”
Say what you may about Steve Harrington, but he was nothing if not determined to be happy and nothing brought him more happiness than his girl. You were his everything, and if he had to give up every other one of his vices to make you his, then he would just have to learn to live without the rest of it.
It was unbelievable to him that you were actually his girlfriend, and even a smile from you could brighten his whole day and send away the rain.
No matter what you two went through together, you had always been by his side, and the truest love he’d ever had.
The least he could do was try to return that favor for you.
That being said, this morning when he brought it up, he knew that you weren’t going to be happy with him but he didn’t really care. He wanted you to be his wife, and would do whatever it would take to get to that point.
Which wasn’t fair.
At some point, he should have considered the position he was putting you in, and since he hadn’t, Steve was grateful you’d brought it up.
The last thing he wanted to do was make you uncomfortable, or make anything harder for you. That was quite literally the reason he wanted to marry you in the first place, so that he could make sure you were always content.
“I love you, that’s what this whole thing is about. So, if you aren’t ready, we’ll wait” he decided, a flood of relief washing over you in an instant.
That was all you needed to hear.
That he wasn’t angry with you, and that he was okay with putting off any greater life planning until you were actually prepared for them.
Steve wasn’t thrilled about it, of course, but he knew what you were saying. In fact, this was one of the reasons he loved you so much. You were so much more realistic than he was, and if he didn’t have you, it was possible that he wouldn’t be able to function even half as well.
“I love you” he repeated, wrapping his arms around you fully now, in what had to be the most comforting hug you’d ever shared.
Not that you could be shocked, even now.
Everything that Steve ever did made him feel that much more irreplaceable to you and he really was. It warmed your heart to know that he was so serious about all of this, and that he really did love you as much as he claimed to.
“I love you! We’ll get there. I promise” you whispered back, giving him a strong squeeze before pulling away almost completely, though not far, considering the fact that you could still feel his breath fanning your face.
“Okay, then I have a promise for you,” Steve grinned, tapping his chin, almost as if deep in thought, before he finally made up his mind.
“I promise that the next time I propose will be the last time”
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littlemessyjessi · 2 years
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"I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for Ice Cream": More Billy Hargrove and his goth GF 
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Billy Hargrove Imagine
Billy Hargrove x PS Reader, Billy Hargrove x Goth Reader
Pre-established relationship
General Idea:  Someone asked for more of reader and her spooky treats. 
Two boots squeaked across the concrete as Billy Hargrove made his way down the hallway. 
Max was already in the car and he'd been waiting on you for ten minutes now. 
He always took you home after school and usually you damn near blasted out of the building. 
So where were you? 
He'd given it about five more minutes before he began to worry. 
He'd gone by your locker thinking that maybe you got held up and were just trying to get your things. 
No such look. 
So his next thought was your last class. 
Home Economics. 
Sure enough as he neared the door he could see your through the little window on the door. 
You were sitting on the stool behind one of the little tables. 
Your chin in your hand, elbow on the table, a completely put out look on your face. 
He watched you through the window for a few seconds more before swinging the door open. 
"Baby?  What are you doing?  Come on." 
You looked up. 
Eyes gone big at him. 
You sighed, smacking your hands to your forehead. 
"Oh, hi, babe.  I'm sorry.  I forgot to tell you to go ahead." you said. 
"Go ahead?" he asked, brows furrowing.  "What are you talking about?  I always take you home."  
"Oh, uh, well." you said, hands fidgeting.  
"Well what?" he pressed, those electric blue eyes narrowing in on you. "Did you get in trouble or something? Detention?" 
He knew it wasn't likely because you were a perfect angel. 
At least in his eyes anyway. 
There wasn't much you could do that would warrant a punishment in Billy's mind… and he had issues with anyone who seemed to think otherwise. 
"No, uh, I'm not in trouble.  I'm just waiting on my cousin.  She's bringing me a cooler.  I, uh, I have ice cream." you said, not meeting his eye. 
"Babe." he chuckled.  "Just get it.  Max is already in the car with the air on and you don't live far.  It'll be fine. Just hold it up to the vent." 
You gnawed on your lip and glanced up at him, "Well, uh, I can't really do that, Billy.  It's too much to hold in the front seat." 
Billy lifted an eyebrow at you, waiting for further explanation. 
You gave a long suffering sigh before standing and opening the classroom freezer behind you. 
There, sitting as pretty as ever were two trays of cups. 
Black and green swirls of ice cream all sat in a row. 
And all untouched. 
He sighed. 
"Baby…" 
You looked like you were about to cry and he crossed the room quickly to gather you in his arms. 
He pressed kisses into your hairline. 
"I just don't get it." you whispered. "It's just ice cream.  Everyone watched me make it yesterday in class.  Like, it's not like I did anything.  I wouldn't do that!" 
"I know, baby." he said, hand rubbing up and down your back. 
"And I was so excited because it's ice cream day, Billy.  Ice cream.  Who doesn't like ice cream?" you vented.  "And I worked hard on it. I stayed up last night and made homemade sprinkles.  And I came in during my lunch just so I could make the syrup fresh. I even made chocolate covered bananas in case anyone wanted a sundae!  It's key lime pie and black coconut because I remembered that it's Hannah Pearson's birthday today and I heard her tell Misty Donahue that she loved key lime pie and that coconut was her new favorite slushie flavor.  So I thought I'd make them special… because it's her birthday!" 
Billy pulled you in a little tighter. 
"But… but she said I was a weirdo.  She said she wouldn't eat anything I made because I'd probably poisoned it.  That they even looked like poison.  Billy, I would never - " 
"Sssh- baby.  I know.  I'm so sorry." he said. 
He hated high school. 
He hated how kids could be. 
And at that moment he hated Hannah Pearson because he knew it was less about you and more about the fact that she'd hit on him and he shot her down because frankly he wasn't interested and also because he was hopeless for you. 
He held you for a little longer before he pressed a kiss to your temple and settled you down on the stool with a sigh. 
"Just sit tight for a second, baby." 
"Why?" you asked immediately. "Where are you going?" 
"Just sit tight, ok?" he said. 
"Billy, don't get into a fight or anything.  I know you already hate Dereck…" you said. 
He chuckled thinking of Hannah's boyfriend. 
He knew that you knew that he wouldn't hit a woman. He wouldn't hit Hannah.  But that certainly wouldn't stop him for starting a fight with her current boyfriend. 
He did hate Dereck Landley because he was a jerk and was actively looking for a reason to bash his face in… but that would have to wait for another day. 
"I won't. I swear.  Just wait here." he said and disappeared out the door. 
He'd made it to the parking lot in moments, opening the door to his car and pulling Max's headphones off. 
"Billy!" she said annoyed. 
"Get out." he said. 
"What?  I didn't even-" 
He sighed, rolling his eyes, "Get out and come inside.  I need your help." 
Her blue eyes widened. 
Billy?  Needed her help?  What had the world come to? 
Nevertheless, she exited the car even if she did give her stepbrother an odd look as she fell into step with him. 
"You're little friends still around?" he asked. 
Max tensed. 
She and Billy had gotten past a lot but she was still wary about some things. 
"Uh…" 
"I'm not gonna do anything.  Relax." he all but growled.  "I just need more people." 
"Uh, I don't know.  I can go see." she said, still unsure. 
He nodded, "Alright, go do that and meet me here in about ten minutes." 
Max, still confused with him, furrowed her brows, but he had already turned around and stalked in a different direction. 
He nearly gagged at the idea of speaking to that familiar head of hair up ahead but he forced it down anyway. 
"Harrington!" he called out. 
Steve turned, his face clearly showing that he was not in the mood. 
Though, Billy was less concerned with Steve and more about the freckled face next to him. 
"Buckley, you got a minute?" he asked. 
"Don't you have a girlfriend?" she quipped. 
"Don't you?" he shot back, sending her cheeks aflame. 
He sighed, "Sorry, reflex.  Look, do you two like ice cream?" 
"What?" Steve asked, bewilderment clear on his face. 
Billy huffed out a breath, "Do you like ice cream?" 
"We do work at Scoops Ahoy…" Robin trailed off. 
"Just come to the Home Ec room in ten minutes." he said and turned away. 
The two teens shared a look of confusion but honestly, Billy's erratic behavior was too good to pass up. 
His last stop was the drama room and as expected when he came through the door the Hellfire club looked up in surprise. 
Never did they think they'd see Billy Hargrove standing there unless he had come to terrorize someone. 
Eddie lifted a brow briefly but painted on a smile, trying to diffuse whatever catastrophe that was about to occur. 
"Uh… meetings are private, Hargrove." he said. "You need an invitation." 
"Do you guys like ice cream?" Billy asked, patience running thin. 
Gareth's eyes bugged out of his head while Jeff's brows drew so far together they almost looked like one. 
"Uh.." Eddie laughed. "What?" 
"Ice cream." Billy repeated.  "Do you like ice cream?" 
"Look, man. We're not try-" 
"Just come to the Home Ec room in ten minutes." he said, promptly turning and leaving the few members to look at one another in confusion. 
Soon enough Billy had circled back around to the front to collect Max and her ragtag group of little hooligans along with Lucas' younger sister, Erica. 
Robin and Steve had been joined by Nancy as well as the junior cheerleader Chrissy Cunningham. 
Eddie, Gareth and Jeff trickled in behind them as they all stood in the middle of the hallway. 
"What's going on, Hargrove?" Steve asked. 
"We're going to the Home Ec room.  My girlfriend made ice cream." he answered as if he were remarking on the weather. 
"Billy." Max groaned. "Come on." 
He sighed, "Listen, the people at this school are dicks." he said. 
"You would know." Robin said. 
Billy lifted an eyebrow at her and she lifted one back. 
"Well, it's true.  You were an asshole until you got with Y/N." she said. "And that's still up for discussion honestly." 
He sighed. "She made ice cream for class today.  And she worked hard on it.  She always does.  And no one would eat it.  They always do that to her and I know it hurts her feelings.  But she deserved better than that.  No one deserves to be ridiculed like that for no reason." 
There was a shift in the group, each turning inward to their own struggles. 
"You don't have to." he said. "I just thought it would be nice.  You can have something nice to eat.  Because I know it will be.  Everything is always great." 
"I can second that." Max chimed in. "She always brings me food in the morning and those mummy things were awesome." 
Billy actually smiled at his stepsister for that. 
To which she panicked and looked away because Billy is Billy. 
"Again, you don't have to but it would be nice.  You'll get something and honestly, I think it would just mean a lot to her." he said.  "Please." 
None of them had really ever seen anything like this from him and certainly never heard him beg. 
So call it moral obligation or pure shock… but they all followed. 
The door opened and you looked up only to curl inwards a little. 
"Billy." you whispered. "I'm not looking to be ridiculed yet again today." 
"No one is here to ridicule you." Billy said, coming to stand at your side and looking at the others. "Just here to have some ice cream.  Right?" 
It was silent for a beat before Eddie stepped forward, leaning on his elbows on the table in front of you. "We wouldn't dream of it, sweetheart." he said, batting his doe eyes at you dramatically.  "Especially not with your trusty guard dog here." 
He winked at Billy who was slightly amused but narrowed his eyes anyway.
"You watch the pet names, Munson. That's my girl you're talking to." he said. 
Eddie gave him an impish grin before sliding around to sit on the stool next to yours. 
"So tell me Miss Culinary Queen.  What's on the menu?  If it's anything like those cakes you brought for your birthday, or maybe it was Christmas in middle school then I'm in!" he said. 
Chrissy startled everyone with her gasp, "Oh my god! Yes! Those little chocolate cakes with the, the, uh chocolate syrup or fudge or something on the inside?" 
"Oh, those were lava cakes." you said. 
"Yes!" Chrissy said. 
"And they were made up to look like actual volcanoes." Eddie said. "Fucking rad, man.   And they were good as fuck. I could eat one right now." 
"Thank you." you said getting to your feet and heading to the freezer. "Um, well, it's not lava cake. But it's homemade ice cream. It's lime and coconut.  And, uh, I have toppings too. And chocolate covered bananas. And chocolate sauce and caramel syrup.  In- In- In case anyone wants a sundae or something." 
There was a murmur of excitement and soon enough the group of people were enjoying their frozen treats and having a good time. 
Billy slid an arm around your waist and pulled you down on his lap, eliciting a small giggle from you. 
"Saved you some." he said, holding out a little cup. 
"Thank you." you said, pecking his cheek. 
"No problem, baby." he said, holding up his cup to yours. 
You clinked the plastic with his, and let the ice cream dance on your tongue. 
And maybe life wasn't perfect. 
Maybe the day had sucked. 
Maybe Home Ec would always be a pain in the ass. 
But you had a guy who loved you and would clearly go to any depths he could to make you happy. 
And that was all you could really ask for. 
"Hey, you know, Y/N. I've literally been trying to talk to you for years but like, every time I get close, you bolt or something." Eddie said. 
"Watch it, Munson." Billy said. 
His glare was soft but still made you giggle and peck his cheek again. 
"Easy, Kujo." Eddie teased him before turning his attention back to you. "I meant as a friend. I just think you look cool is all.  I see the little projects you do sometimes and they're pretty badass.  I've always kinda thought we'd be good friends." 
"Oh." you said, shock coloring your tone. "Well, I mean, I didn't mean to run away.  I guess I was just preoccupied or maybe I thought I was in the way. But, but thank you.  I, uh, I've seen your band before.  You guys are awesome." 
Eddie grinned massively and you smiled back. 
And Billy had an inkling that perhaps he'd done more than cheer you up. 
Maybe just maybe… he'd brought a couple of friends together. 
Hey, loves.  So now I'm fucking soft again.  NO ONE TOUCH ME!  *sobs*  
Anyway, I hope you liked it and I would love to hear your thoughts! 
Be nice to yourself and please drink a cup of water today! 
Love, K 
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474 notes · View notes
babiestmunson · 2 years
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This Joseph / This Joe
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2K notes · View notes
eddieandbird · 1 year
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Eddie encourages you to be more outspoken during D&D
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sanguineterrain · 1 year
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Could I get a blurb about going to see a scary movie at a drive-in theater with Eddie? 🥰
eeeee this was fun to write aud, thank you <3 i sprinkled in a little angst but it's 99% fluff. p.s. i'm still accepting st requests!
****
"Now you're sure you wanna see The Shining? They're showing Ghostbusters in the other lot."
Eddie scoffs, shoving a handful of popcorn into his mouth.
"Have you seen me, baby? Lock up your daughter, lock up your wife! Lock up your back door and run for your life!"
You roll your eyes.
"You're just quoting AC/DC to me, Ed."
He finishes his mouthful and swallows.
"Bon Scott puts it better than I ever could, sweets."
"Right. It's just, I know you have trouble sleeping with this stuff. Remember when Wayne took you camping and told you those ghost stories?"
"I was a kid!" he cries.
"That was three years ago, Eddie."
"Honey, c'mon. I got attacked by killer bats last year. I think I can handle some corn syrup blood."
You frown. "What happened in the Upside Down doesn't mean you can't be afraid anymore."
"I know! I know. 'S just, y'know." He picks at a loose thread on his jeans. "We've seen the real thing. Movies can't hurt me. I know that."
You press your lips together. "If you're sure, Eds."
Eddie beams. "Positive."
You settle under the thick blankets contributed by both you and Eddie. He takes another scoop of popcorn. The film begins.
And it's fine. Eddie watches the arrival of the Torrances without issue. He leans over and comments on how Jack Nicholson looks absolutely unhinged from the start.
"Is he gonna lose his mind?" Eddie predicts. "I think he's gonna lose it."
As the ghosts arrive, however, Eddie starts to shift in his seat. It comes to a head when Jack Torrance truly does lose his mind. Eddie flinches at the axe splitting the door and shuts his eyes, turning away. You set your candy on the dashboard and scoot over, slowly sliding an arm around Eddie's shoulders.
"Hey," you say softly, turning down the radio. "Eds. We don't have to watch it if you don't want to."
Eddie looks at you. His cheeks are slightly red. You smile.
"'M such a scaredy cat," he mumbles.
"Eddie, it's okay if you don't like scary movies."
"Am I still the most metal guy you know?"
"Obviously," you grin.
"What if I said this was all a ploy to get you to snuggle me?"
"Now that I'd fully believe," you say. "But we didn't have to go see The Shining for that, honey."
Eddie pouts. You put down the visor so he doesn't have to keep watching.
"I used to be fearless, y'know," he says. "Sure, Wayne's ghost stories were always spooky as fuck. But I could handle it. And then after last year I just—"
He shakes his head. You nod.
"I know," you murmur. "Feels too real."
"Yeah," Eddie sighs. "Watching Nancy Wheeler saw off a shotgun really sucked the fun outta slashers."
"Well," you say. "I haven't seen Ghostbusters. And I've heard great things about that one."
Eddie smiles, a peek of fang showing.
"You're missing out, honeylove."
"Am I? Seems like we oughta get a move on then. We may just be able to find a good spot."
You peck his cheek. Eddie turns the ignition. He looks at you.
"Sure it's okay?" he checks, biting his lip.
You squeeze his shoulder, tilting your head fondly.
"Yeah, Eds. I'm sure. And if we don't get a good view, well..."
You lean over and kiss his jaw. His pulse quickens. You smirk.
"I'm sure we can think of something to pass the time."
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ahundredtimesover · 2 months
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I Want You to Stay (03) | JJK
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Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags: boss!JK x assistant!reader; idiot strangers to lovers; slow slow burn; k-drama feels; angst, drama, fluff, smut
Chapter (Series) Warnings: foul/explicit language; alcohol consumption & passing out, unhealthy coping mechanisms; family drama; minor injuries; power dynamics (JK starts off as a jerk); work-related anxiety, feelings of helplessness, insecurities; childhood traumatic experiences, nightmares; sexual harassment, prior incidence of domestic violence (PLS PLS BE CAREFUL WHEN READING); arts and business/property devt talk that’s probably inaccurate; commitment issues & emotionally constipated characters; cold and detached JK; explicit sexual content (specific warnings stated per chapter) (18+)
Chapter Word count: 14.8k
Series Masterlist
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Status: Ongoing
Series summary: Working for Jungkook isn’t the same as working for Hoseok. For starters, Jungkook doesn’t smile, he doesn’t appreciate you, and he gives you too much work. It doesn’t help that he’s incredibly handsome and has women at his beck and call. But as the tension grows, it becomes impossible to resist him. You’ve dedicated yourself to your job for 8 years so when you finally decide to put yourself first, he asks you to reconsider. And while you know that leaving is difficult, you learn that when it comes to Jungkook, staying is always so much harder.
Playlist 🎶: on the way home
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A/N: I've been thoroughly enjoying your asks and replies about this story (sorry I can’t get to each one!) I see that a lot can relate to what OC's going through and I'm sending you hugs! 🤗 Again, I appreciate your love and excitement. And uh... Golden JK in that white tank. YUP. 🤭 Hoping you enjoy this one!
And as always, my biggest thanks to @wonwoonlight  🥰
PS. If I can’t tag you, pls fix your settings!
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The spring in your step tightens the closer you get to Jungkook’s penthouse the next Monday. Walking here to start another week, there’s a mix of emotions you’re carrying with you. 
You got to spend a proper weekend. On Friday, you made yourself some cold noodles and then watched a movie with Jimin and Soomin on video call, who’d said they’ll be visiting you in a week. You took the train to Daegu on Saturday, went to the park, then stayed in to enjoy Min-woo’s cooking and the girls’ stories about school and their youth clubs. You then buried yourself in your mother’s embrace as you told her about your week. You didn’t want to say too much, not wanting her to worry that her daughter isn’t being treated well at her job, but you suppose you said enough. 
“I wish I was strong enough to protect you from everything,” she’d told you softly. “All I can do is just give you hugs and say words of encouragement that might not even mean much.”
“And you still are, mom. I look forward to being with you because of those hugs. But more than that, you were strong enough to protect me from the bad guys,” you’d assured her. “Jungkook is many things but he’s not a terrible person. I can handle him.”
And you meant it. He may be hot-tempered sometimes but he’s not evil. But just because he made you go home early last Friday, it also doesn’t mean he’s suddenly redeemed in your mind. Sure, he didn’t email you at all over the weekend unlike last time, but he also still didn’t apologize to you nor show remorse. 
Perhaps that small nod after he called you telling you that you could go home was his way of saying sorry, or maybe it just isn’t in his vocabulary. You wonder if Hoseok had told him off but even then, it’s a pretty quick change, if you could call it that. 
Regardless, you felt like a human being again these past few days; you just wish Jungkook woke up on the right side of the bed this morning and doesn’t find a reason to complain about you. 
Unlocking the door, you’re surprised to hear silence - there are no grunts and deep breaths nor the sound of leather hitting leather from his morning workout. You scan the floor before walking around - a habit you’ve developed after finding that laced underwear last week - and then peep into the door on the right, only to find untouched equipment and no other traces of him. 
You’re in the living room when you hear another door close, prompting you to turn around and see a woman appearing from the hallway on the other side of the penthouse. Her hair’s a bit disheveled and she’s wearing one of Jungkook’s coats that you saw in his closet. 
“Uh, who are you?” The woman scoffs, her arms crossed and eyebrows raised now. 
Taken aback, you just stare at her, until you realize she’s not wearing anything underneath so you look away.
You try to make sense of who she is and how you could get out of this situation. You know for a fact that Jungkook doesn’t have a girlfriend, at least that’s what Lucas had told you, but who knows what Jungkook’s been up to since he got back? There was that red laced underwear from last week after all. Maybe he does sleep around like what Do-hyun said. Maybe this woman just doesn’t know Jungkook has a female assistant. Maybe he’s—
“Hey, I’m talking to you,” she says, sounding more annoyed now. 
“Oh. Uh, I’m Mr. Jeon’s—”
“She’s my assistant,” Jungkook answers, catching you off guard, given that you hadn’t noticed him walk in. 
He’s not in his usual workout attire, although him in a white tank top and gray sweatpants with mussed hair somehow seems more overwhelming than him in nothing but gym shorts. You glance at him as he stands next to the woman, whose face suddenly lights up. Not wanting to look at her, you shift your gaze towards the ceiling, trying hard not to look awkward as you’re rooted in place. 
The woman looks at you from head to toe and you feel her judging you, assessing you, while Jungkook stands there, yawning and combing his hair with his fingers.
“Just your assistant?” She asks, sounding incredulous. 
“Yeah. What else would she be?” Jungkook answers nonchalantly. Looking at you, he nods ever so slightly that you almost miss it, another hint of acknowledgement you’d seen last Friday. “Just eggs on toast. And coffee.”
“Yes, Mr. Jeon,” you say, exhaling the breath you were holding and then walking to the kitchen to start on his breakfast. 
“I don’t know, another one of your girls? I see you with a new one every time,” she huffs, sounding bitter, but Jungkook doesn’t sound amused.
“What are you still doing here?” He asks, walking to where you are then taking the glass of water you prepare for him. “I called a service for you last night.”
“I was too tired,” she says, and you don’t miss the sultry tone of her voice now. “You tired me out, Jungkook. I could barely get off the bed.”
“And why are you still here?” He asks, clearly not having it with her teasing. 
“Because I’m still tired,” she smirks, having followed him to the kitchen. 
You feel tense once more; you definitely don’t want to be part of this conversation in any way nor be privy to it, especially given what obviously happened between them last night. And especially not with Jungkook looking and sounding the way he does this early Monday morning.
“And I was thirsty,” she continues. 
He sets his glass down and opens the refrigerator and takes out a bottle of water that he hands over to her. 
“Ugh, how romantic,” she rolls her eyes, finishing it in a few gulps. 
“I have to go to work,” he tells her, frustrated that she’s being stubborn about not leaving when he no longer seems to want her around. 
“Actual work, or, you know, work?” She says, gesturing towards you.
You make the mistake of looking at her smug face, the insinuation not lost on you. It’s insane how she can just make claims like that, and you feel that just like you, Jungkook’s getting pissed.
“Can you just leave?” He says much more sternly now. “I can’t start my day with you still here.”
“Ooh, how rude,” she giggles. “Should’ve expected you’d be like that even outside of bed. I like that.”
She walks back to the room, leaving you and Jungkook on your own. You continue to work on his eggs while he stands by the counter, rubbing his temples. You’re unsure if it’s because of her or from last night’s alcohol, but you get aspirin and also a bottle of energy drink and set them in front of him before returning to preparing his meal. 
The woman comes back shortly in last night’s attire then walks towards Jungkook.
“I’m leaving,” she announces, tilting his chin so he would face her. “I’ll see you again, yeah?”
Jungkook turns away and does not respond, leaving her to laugh as if there’s a joke that only she’s in on.
“Going all quiet on me now, huh?” She says. “You weren’t like that last night. I can still hear your moans, actually. Fuck, they sounded so good and so loud.”
You almost hit your finger as you slice the apple, clearly not expecting for this stranger to say something so intimate, knowing there’s another person in the room with them. You don’t know if she wants to intimidate you for whatever reason or maybe just make you feel uncomfortable. Whatever it is, it’s working, as you’re unable to focus on the task at hand now. 
Jungkook still doesn’t say anything, and it’s what prompts her to finally say goodbye. 
“Fine, I’ll leave now,” she whines. “But that was an amazing first time. I hope it won’t be the last.”
Her giggle annoys you for some reason, even more when you mistakenly look her way. Her smug face unnerves you as she holds your gaze while she says, “I’ll see you again, okay? I’ll make sure you’ll scream my name next time,” the words obviously directed at Jungkook. 
She finally exits the penthouse but she doesn’t take the tension with her because in this large apartment with you and him, you feel a little too hot, a little too alert, yet somehow a little too curious.
Jungkook groans now as he finishes his energy drink, and he doesn’t know what he’s more frustrated about - the fact that the woman whose name he doesn’t remember didn’t go home, or that you’d found out about it in the most embarrassing way and he’d done nothing to stop her attempts at making you feel uncomfortable because that’s definitely what she was doing. 
He doesn’t know how it affected you but even he can tell that it wouldn’t have been good. Not that he’s ashamed of his lifestyle but it’s different when you, of all people, get to see what that looks like. You did see the laced underwear on his kitchen floor last week, and he knows you definitely tried to pretend you hadn’t. Perhaps the image of arrogant, playboy Jungkook just solidified in your head and the fact that maybe that’s what you think of him is making him feel uneasy. 
Not that he cares about what you think - he definitely does not - but he just doesn’t want that to affect how you would treat him in a professional sense, as if he’s some reckless man who works too hard and parties much harder, even if that’s kind of what he does. 
The hangover doesn’t help at all; he shouldn’t have chugged that wine while the woman was giving him head, which was amazing, he reminds himself. He just knows he won’t be seeing her again after this morning because she’d been stubborn and shameless, and definitely not because of how she spoke to you and the insinuations she made.
“Mr. Jeon, your breakfast is ready,” you inform him, breaking him out of his thoughts. 
He takes a seat on the table and you sit next to him, taking out your iPad to start your rundown of last Friday’s meeting and this week’s schedule. 
“So—”
“Wait, give me a minute,” he stops you, and he realizes just how little sleep he actually got and he’s gonna have to push through today’s busy schedule despite feeling physically out of it. 
“Okay, sir,” you say softly.
He munches on his toast with his eyes closed, and when he opens them, his gaze falls on you, sitting upright on the chair looking clean and proper in your blush blouse and beige skirt. You seem to be reviewing the reports from last week, your eyebrows scrunched as you scribble on the screen. He knows you took the hours-long trip to and from Daegu over the weekend; the visit, just like any, must have been tiring. Yet you come to his place everyday without fail, ready to do what he needs you to do, and he doesn’t even know if you’ve had anything to eat yet. 
“Have you had breakfast?” He asks.
“E-excuse me?”
“Breakfast. Have you had it?”
“O-oh. Yes, I had some crackers and fruit on the way. I ate on the bus,” you respond.
He remembers your address from your staff profile. You live about 40 minutes from him, almost double if you commute. You come at 6:30 everyday, so he can only imagine what it’s like for you every morning. 
“Why don’t you drive?”
“I don’t have a car, sir.”
“Shouldn’t that be part of your contract? Or a benefit of some sort?”
“It isn’t. I believe only the CEO’s assistant does,” you respond. 
“Bitna has a company car.”
“Ms. Jung requested that when she was still President.”
“Then I’ll request one for you. It's… it’s too early. And you can’t always be assured of public transportation. There could be delays. Or an emergency that would require you to drive.”
Of course, he’d want you to get a car so that you’re more accessible to him. Just when you thought there’s actually a bit of his heart working this time, he reminds you why there isn’t.
“That’s true, but nothing has happened so far. And there are other options should there be,” you say. “I also don’t know how to drive so there is no need, Mr. Jeon. I leave my apartment early enough to make sure I get here on time, and I’ll let you know if I will be late.”
Jungkook just hums, even if there’s more he wants to know. What about late nights? What if there’s a storm? Well, he does know - he did see you miss out on taxis and then just walk last Tuesday; he wonders how you got home then, and how many hours of sleep you had after all that. 
He lets it go; it’s too early to think about this.
“Good. We can run through the minutes now,” he says.
So you do, stating the points and confirming your actions for each one and then noting down his as well. You try to focus, and you’re able to for the most part, but it’s not easy when he sits just a few feet away from you, with his bare arms propped on the table that’s just hard to look away from. 
You’ve always liked tattoos on other people, and the art on his right arm looks so delicate and personal; you wonder what someone like him would value enough to ink permanently on his skin. Even his untouched arm is mesmerizing, toned like every other part of him, with beauty marks that you spot as well. It doesn’t help that his slightly long hair keeps falling over his eyes, prompting him to comb them with his fingers every time. 
What also doesn’t help are the woman’s words from earlier, as she’d managed to make you think of Jungkook in a very different way, given her descriptions of how he’d been last night. You don’t know what she intended by doing that, but you didn’t miss her insinuations about your relations with him, which are definitely far from the truth. Learning that he’s rough and loud in bed is also knowledge that you could’ve done without. Somehow, he sounds like how he looks - expressive of negative emotions, and the type to drain the other person. 
He also sounds like the guys you’ve slept with.
The thought alarms you. These are things you shouldn’t be thinking about your boss, about the man who pays you, about the one who makes you miss meals and buses and who makes you angry because of how he treats you. 
You try to dispel these ideas by coughing - the loud sound helps, and you also want to distract yourself from how distracted you are at your task because somehow he keeps getting more and more attractive after every glance. 
He stands up, and just when you thought he’d be angry after your disruption, he surprises you by placing a glass of water in front of you.
“You can drink, you know? You can make yourself a cup of coffee. You can even cook yourself breakfast if it’s just crackers you eat in the morning,” he says. 
Yes, you think to yourself. You’ve been wanting to try his coffee because of the fancy machine but breakfast sounds… too domestic. 
“Thank you, but I’m okay. I mean, the snacks fill me up just fine.”
“It’s not proper breakfast, though,” he argues. 
“With all due respect, sir, eating takes time away from all the things I have to do. I manage just fine.”
Expecting an annoyed expression from him because you did just imply that you do too much, you instead see the tiniest hint of guilt on his face, as if he actually feels bad that you’re unable to take care of yourself because of him. 
“You’re not a servant, Ms. Cho. You’re not disallowed to do basic things just because of your job.”
“You have standards, Mr. Jeon,” you say, throwing his words back at him. You don’t expect to see his face fall a little, and you’re surprised that you seem to care. “I need to meet them, and I’m still familiarizing myself with how you want things done, and that takes time. I don’t mean to imply that you treat me like a servant because you don’t. I just… I want to be able to do things right and I’m still learning.”
The words hit Jungkook. He knows he’d been too critical during these first weeks, and that’s more because he’s unable to manage the initial attraction that he’s trying so hard to temper. He could’ve gone on correcting you constructively, with no need for harshness the way he did with Lucas when he started. 
You’ve also been doing this for a few years. You’ve been working for the VP’s office longer than he has - you know the people and the processes more, yet you’re the one claiming you need to learn and do things right. Even he thinks his father, whom he never thought was the best at looking out for his people, wouldn’t be angry at those below him for irrational reasons. Somehow he thinks he’s worse than his old man now. 
But the word sorry isn’t in his vocabulary. He’d rarely ever said it, and the only reason he’d heard it a lot growing up was because people caused his inconvenience, and not because they’d hurt his feelings. He doesn’t know what that’s like - forgiving and wanting to be forgiven. They’re foreign to him, but somehow those are what you’re making him want to know. 
“I—”
“Can we move on, Mr. Jeon?” You interrupt him. “You have a scheduled check-in with your father before the 8:30 team meeting.”
“Right, that’s today,” Jungkook says, letting go of any form of apology he could muster. 
He nods then stands up to head to his bathroom, and you follow shortly after to arrange his outfits for the week. You clean up in the kitchen after and wait for him to come out, with you reflexively walking up to him to fix his tie and make sure all the creases on his clothes are fixed. 
Jungkook tries to remain still as you, like everyday, make sure he looks proper. It always took him a long time to get ready because he used to do all this on his own, but with you taking on the unofficial stylist role - which he admits you do a great job at - he’s relieved of that added stress of looking the part of a Vice President. It just also means that every morning, he has to look unaffected as you stand close to him like this, with you tightening his tie and your fingers grazing his clothed chest.
You smell like roses. It feels warm and nostalgic, like it’s familiar but also something new. It’s refreshing on you, and it wafts through his nose and paralyzes him a little. He tries to hold his breath like always, only briefly glancing at your focused eyes as you make sure he looks impeccable. 
He’s caught off guard when you look up and meet his gaze. He doesn’t react, but he does linger and surprisingly, so do you. He wants to apologize but he doesn’t know how to. He just hopes you feel it somehow with how he looks at you; he’d like to think you do, as you gently bow and step back, taking your things to go down. 
You go through his schedule while in the car, noting his dinner meetings and that the food tasting for next month’s event with the art industry professionals that you’re both organizing has been moved to next week, freeing up his Thursday lunch hour.
“I’ll schedule my visit at Taehyung’s tailor shop that day then,” Jungkook states. “I’ll have a few suits done.”
“Noted, Mr. Jeon,” you reply, adjusting his calendar. 
He doesn’t say anything after. He takes his leather notebook and sketches like he often does, looking out his window only a few times as he’s engrossed in his drawings. Even with all that he is, you can’t deny Jungkook’s talent. You only know he took an architecture course but you don’t know if he actually practices it. 
You start to wonder if Jungkook wanted that to be his profession but couldn’t pursue it because he’s expected to manage the company with his cousin. You wonder if he’d always been into drawing and the arts, if it was an outlet the way reading picture books was for you; you’d wanted to become an illustrator but your mother couldn’t afford drawing classes and that profession just didn’t seem like it could sustain you financially. You wonder what Jungkook thinks when he sketches and what his subjects are, if he feels at peace the way he looks, if he hopes he could just spend his days doing this. 
The seeming warmth in your thoughts about this man concerns you, prompting you to turn away from his direction and stare out the window instead. You remind yourself that this is the same person who’d made the past two weeks miserable for you; he doesn’t deserve warmth from you in any form, even if, for the briefest moment earlier after you fixed his tie, that’s what you gave him. You learned that he’s quite mesmerizing when he doesn’t talk or when he isn’t scowling. You also learned you’re quite quick to fall into it when you let your guard down a little. 
You groan internally. There’s a lot you don’t know about him and you don’t really care to know more; what you know is enough to put you off anyway. And so these moments of weakness - of curiosity, of concern -  should not happen again. 
Except, they do happen, over an hour later after Jungkook returns to his room from his check-in with his father. He sits on his chair, his eyes closed and jaws clenched, unmoving for a good few minutes, and you watch from your seat, wondering what transpired that’s got him this disturbed. 
It happens again an hour later. He moved the team meeting to the afternoon and he’s now furiously typing on his desktop, making calls, sketching, making calls again, then sitting still with his eyes closed once more. Hoseok walks in, merely nodding at you, then enters the room and speaks with the younger man. Jungkook closes the blinds, and you’re left to wonder what’s going on behind closed doors and what’s got him angry and frustrated.
You take your chance at finding out when Hoseok emerges, asking him if everything’s okay, if Jungkook is okay.
“Yeah, he’s fine,” Hoseok says, a half smile on display, something you’re only a tad familiar with. “He’ll manage.”
He rushes out, saying he has a meeting to get to, and you nod, glancing at the closed door and blocked window, wondering what troubles Jungkook is handling on his own. If it’s personal, it’s clearly not your business. But if it’s work-related, then it is. You’re there to make things easier for him, after all. You also don’t want to be surprised and be bombarded by new tasks just in case, so it’s better to know if there’s something you can help in resolving things as well.
You walk in his room then place the ginger lemon tea on his desk, a common home remedy for hangovers, just in case last night’s events are still affecting him. You inform him that you’ve sent the reports already for his sign-off, and he responds that he’ll get to them tomorrow.
Glancing at his drink, he halts his typing to look at you. 
“Do I look hungover to you?” He asks pointedly.
It’s clearly not what you meant, but you suppose the insinuation isn’t what he needs right now. You want to be swallowed by the ground. He was already calm towards you, civil even, and now there’s another reason for him to be upset at you. You wanted to avoid any possibility of that as much as possible, and now you’re here, at the verge of being told off again, just because your stupid brain decided to care the tiniest bit.
“I, uh, no, Mr. Jeon,” you stutter. “I just…”
You don’t have a reason. Clearly, you can’t tell him that he hasn’t seemed okay all morning - whatever that means - and that just in case it’s last night’s alcohol affecting him, there’s a cure. You stare back at him with worry, but instead of challenging or questioning you, he just sits back with his eyes closed again and dismisses you. 
“You may leave,” he instructs. 
“What about lunch, sir?” You ask. 
You’d never cared before, why the change now? 
“I’m fine,” he responds. “Call me when the meeting’s about to start.”
Your stubborn self takes the box of biscuits from the coffee table and places it in front of him. You’re pushing it, you think, but there’s a meeting he’ll be leading and he can’t be unfocused; when he is, it’s all the worse for you. 
He doesn’t react and you walk out. When you enter an hour later to call him, you spot the empty cup and the crumbs on the saucer, and you can’t help the tiny smile that you make internally.
It’s short-lived though, as that whole afternoon, he acts unusually - he barely makes comments at updates, he doesn’t make eye contact, and doesn’t ask further questions. He just nods when you say you’re heading out at 6PM, giving you no added tasks to keep you from leaving.
You enter his penthouse the next morning to the banging of leather hitting leather, prompting you to jerk from the loud sounds. He’s grunting and panting heavily, and you just know that whatever it was that transpired yesterday, he’s releasing all his emotions right now, through this. 
He exits the gym and walks to the counter where you are, finishing the water you laid for him in three gulps. 
“Do you need that tended to?” You ask. 
He looks surprised. You gesture towards his hands and he looks at his bruised knuckles; he really let it all out this morning, it seems. 
“I’m fine,” he shrugs. 
You didn’t think those two words from him would ever make you feel discouraged, but one thing you’ve come to learn about Jungkook is that he easily expresses his anger and frustration towards other people. It’s when he keeps things in that they seem more serious, and you wonder what words he heard yesterday that might have made him this closed off, this quiet, this much more distant.
But fortunately, your feeling of worry fades with each day that passes, as he slowly returns to his normal self after - the focus, the perpetually serious look, the attention to detail, the sketching on his notebook. Perhaps Jungkook just needed a particular kind of release and he’s maybe handling things better now. 
For his sake and yours, you wish the issue has been resolved, otherwise another blow up might happen and that wouldn’t be good for your newfound dynamic that’s a lot more civil than anything. 
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It’s Thursday when you get a call at 5 in the morning, just as you’ve woken up to get ready for work, and Mr. Ri’s voice greets you on the other end.
“Hi, ___. How are you this morning?”
“Hi, Mr. Ri,” you yawn, curious as to why he’s checking up on you this early. “Is everything okay?”
“Yes,” he hums. “I was instructed by Mr. Jeon to pick you up today.”
“Why would CEO Jeon ask that?” You wonder, as you sleepily walk to the bathroom to wash up.
“He didn’t. Jungkook did.”
You stop on your tracks. You don’t recall being informed about this, nor do you know of any particular reason why you should be at his place so soon.
“Oh, uhm, okay. I should be ready in–”
“I’ll be there in about 50 minutes,” Mr. Ri interjects. “Sleep in a bit more and have some breakfast. I’ll see you shortly.”
You try not to think about what prompted Jungkook to have you picked up, so you focus on getting ready and then whipping yourself some fried rice using the leftover seafood from last night. You won’t lie, it tastes delicious. It might be that you just haven’t had proper weekday breakfast in a while, but it could also be that you’re energized enough and not pressed for time that you’re able to make this as good as it is. 
You decide to bring some to Jungkook’s place just in case you get there late. Sure, Mr. Ri will be driving you, but you don’t know how the traffic is at this time, and this change in schedule is somewhat making you anxious. But then again, there’s always bread or cereal for him to eat; you just think that a little act of thanks wouldn’t be so bad.
Mr. Ri arrives exactly 50 minutes later and he assures you that he’ll get you to the penthouse in half an hour. You trust him of course; he’s been with the Jeons for decades and he knows these streets like the back of his hand. Seated in the passenger seat, you try to figure out what about today has got your boss a little kinder than usual. 
“I arrived five minutes late yesterday,” you wonder out loud. “Is that why? He has a meeting with a local artist in the morning and he doesn’t want me to be late. That should be it. Ugh, stupid,” you groan. “I should’ve taken the first bus I saw, but it was so full and–”
“___,” Mr. Ri stops you. “Five minutes isn’t much. Plus, you always arrive 10 minutes before 6:30 and then just wait at the lobby. I don’t know why you do, you could always just go up to the penthouse when you get there, you know?”
“No, I don’t. Mr. Jeon has boundaries and clearly likes keeping his distance. Going to his penthouse before I’m supposed to be there feels like I’m intruding,” you argue.
“You’re literally his assistant, and you go to his bedroom and his closet, fix his things, prepare his meals… there’s no intrusion happening,” Mr. Ri counters. “I know the man. He’ll probably just look at you curiously then go about his routine.”
“Well, since you know him so well, then why did he have me picked up this morning?”
There’s a brief silence before the man next to you responds.
“He did note that you were late for the first time, but that wasn’t his issue,” Mr. Ri says, appeasing you before you react negatively and think that your tardiness was a big deal. “He asked if I knew how you got to Hoseok’s place before and I said you would just take the bus; it was closer to your place so it was fine. They have someone to make his breakfast, too, so you didn’t need to come early; plus, you only went every Monday.”
“What a change, huh?” You attempt to poke fun at yourself and the new arrangement you’re in. 
Not that you’re complaining; you know of other executive assistants who do much more for their bosses and what you have with Jungkook isn’t even that bad. But it is quite the shift compared to what you did for Hoseok. You’ve figured out your own routine, though. And the commute isn’t always terrible, for as long as you’re not one of the unlucky ones, given the recent incidents. 
“It’s quite the change. I don’t think he realized that until yesterday. He also asked me if I know if you eat properly in the morning. Maybe he thinks you don’t?”
“I’ve skipped meals…” you trail. “And well, I told him that I just eat crackers on the bus. Maybe he thinks I’m losing focus some days.”
“Maybe he’s just concerned.”
You snort at the absurdity of the statement. 
Mr. Ri sighs. He knows that Jungkook hasn’t been his best self since he arrived in Seoul, and especially towards you. He’s noticed the young man’s indifference, the occasional passive remark, the frustrated looks, and the tension every morning. He’s noticed your faraway eyes, too, your constant anxiety, and unusual lack of confidence in your usual tasks, given that you look to be second-guessing everything you do. 
As someone who’s worked for the Jeons for so long and who’d watched Jungkook grow up, he’s used to the detachment, but it was always because the young man often lived in his own head. There are always lots of thoughts and ideas, and lots of feelings he keeps bottled in. 
But he’s also seen Jungkook’s kindness that he doesn’t always show, the guilt and anger that restrain him from expressing his emotions, and the care that he seems to put a brake on when he shows too much of it to someone, and so it isn’t much of a surprise to him to him when the young man gave this specific instruction to pick you up, not just today but everyday moving forward.
“The news on the radio reported on the robberies and complaints of sexual harassment against female commuters last night,” Mr. Ri continues. “They attack at any hour now. I’m sure that’s why. He wants me to drive you home everyday, too.”
“Mr. Ri, that’s too much,” you protest. “That’s not part of my contract and it isn’t his responsibility.”
“Maybe, precisely why I think he’s concerned. It isn’t about making sure you’re not late to work or anything. He’s worried that something might happen to you. And I agree. It isn’t safe, ___.”
“It’s not safe for me anywhere. I just… it’s too much,” you sigh. “I don’t need this kind of service. I’m not entitled to it.”
“He’ll insist though. Will you argue with him over your own security? I mean, it’s either this or he’ll pay for your driving lessons and then request for a car for you to use.”
You sigh, knowing he has a point. You don’t think you deserve it but you also can’t deny that the concern makes you feel a certain kind of way for him; gratitude, for one, and something else you can’t exactly name. 
“Okay,” you say softly. 
“Good. It’s about time he makes it up to you,” he chuckles. “Boy’s been a brat these past weeks. I wanted to just knock some sense into him.”
“Hmm, not like I expected any less,” you huff. “He just looked grumpy or disinterested during the times I’ve seen him before. Unhappy people like that aren’t always the kindest. Has he always been that way?”
“I wouldn’t say he has. I mean, he just wasn’t joyful or expressive, not like his brother. Jungkook liked to keep to himself; Hoseok often tried to push him out of his comfort zone but the boy wouldn’t really budge. I think as he grew up, that just amplified. People who prefer being alone have their reasons, don’t they?”
They do. You know this just like anyone, perhaps as much as Jungkook. It’s comfortable being alone; there’s no one to hurt you and no one you could hurt. You wonder if his reason is the same, and if, like you, he feels the loneliness creep in every once in a while. 
You nod in silence and the conversation doesn’t continue until you arrive at Jungkook’s building. You have five minutes to get to his unit and you get there in three. When you enter, you hear grunting from the gym, and it’s shortly after when he exits and drinks the glass of water on the counter.
“What’s that?” He gestures at the plastic container next to you.
“It’s fried rice. I made it this morning because I had time to eat breakfast at home,” you say, softly smiling and then bowing at him to show your gratitude. Whatever his reason is, the act was appreciated. 
“And you’re gonna eat again?”
“I was actually–”
You stop midway. You actually meant to serve it to him in case you arrived late, which you realize is pretty ridiculous. 
“Actually what?” He asks, leaning forward on the counter now, with his bare arms from his tank top blinding you a little. 
“I didn’t know what time I was gonna get here so I thought as a last resort, I’ll bring this to heat up and serve to you but then I realized that that’s pretty stupid because it’s leftovers and definitely not high-quality ingredients and it’s… just silly. Plus, you don’t eat rice in the morning.”
With his scrunched brows, he asks, “is it good?”
“It’s pretty delicious,” you say. “I mean, I liked it. I don’t know how sophisticated your palate is… Mr. Jeon.”
You smack yourself internally for rambling. 
“What’s that got to do with anything? If it’s good, then it’s good.”
“I’m an ordinary person, Mr. Jeon. I have normal people’s taste buds.”
“So that makes me, what? Abnormal?”
“No… I–” you unknowingly pout. You shouldn’t have brought this in the first place. 
Jungkook is disarmed again at the sight of your pouty face. If this is your way of thanking him for this morning, he’ll take it. The fact that you’d brought something you cooked from your own place to feed to him is already enough to make him feel hazy, which is why he needs to get away from you right away.
“Just heat it up. I’ll have that. There’s not much food in here anyway,” he says, walking away, leaving you no room to resist.
You do as you’re told, not wanting to overthink and change anything. You do check the cupboard and see a stashed pantry, and you wonder if he’d wanted to find something to criticize about your cooking, too. 
He walks in and lets you fix his tie again, and for some reason, you feel more nervous than you normally do today. You sit and busy yourself with responding to emails as he eats his breakfast, careful not to look at him while he does.
“It’s good, a little better than how I do mine,” he says, surprising you.
“You cook?” You ask too quickly.
“Of course,” he frowns, looking a little offended. “I lived on my own for years. How do you think I survived?”
“Hiring people to do it for you,” you shrug. 
Peeking at him once again, you see that he’s almost finished with the dish, and you can’t help the little smile on your face at the thought that he might actually enjoy it. It’s just fried rice, but you let yourself feel the shallow happiness from this. He’s at least not berating you or anything.
He finishes his meal as you go through yesterday’s meetings. There’s not much about the Arts Center he says, just like yesterday and the day before, and you start to wonder if the issue with his father has anything to do with that. 
You let it go, opting to just follow his pace and let him talk about it when he’s ready, if he ever will be. 
The morning goes by smoothly. Jungkook meets with Yoongi in his office then reviews the reports you’d sent last Monday. He sends you an email, saying that they’ve been approved and for you to attach his signature for sign-off and dissemination, leaving you perplexed at the lack of any other comments again. 
He goes for a quick lunch at the dining hall while you eat a sandwich at the pantry, and not long after, you’re back in the car to head to Jungkook’s appointment with his best friend.
Kim Taehyung’s tailor shop boasts of classic European design. It’s elegant in all the ways that he is, as he stands by the desk in his working space, a smaller room on the mezzanine floor with an exquisite couch and displays of his work. He’s donned in an orange suit that you think only he can pull off, while his brother, Seokjin, sits on a chair in an impeccable black 3-piece. 
You know as much that Jungkook grew up with both men, but while the brothers are often a hot topic on the news because of their wealth, their successful businesses, and colorful dating lives, you now wonder how Jungkook managed to stay out of the spotlight despite being a lot of the things that they are. 
You bow at them after Jungkook introduces you as his assistant, and you’re surprised when Seokjin reaches out his hand to shake yours, bowing as well and offering you a kind smile. Taehyung does the same, and you can’t help but feel the warmth on your cheeks. They’re clearly incredibly handsome men with amazing styles, just like your boss, but they’re obviously respectful and gentle, unlike him. 
“Nice to meet you, Ms. Cho,” Taehyung smiles. “So, what events do I need to dress my best friend for?”
He looks warm, friendly, and you can’t help but mirror his smile as he offers you a seat and some tea. You take out your calendar and enumerate at least three big events in the next months, which would require standout designs. Jungkook also wants four additional everyday classic suits, and Taehyung starts sketching on his pad as you speak. 
“Make one for my event, too,” Seokjin says. “I’m launching my traditional alcohol brand in Singapore in September. It’ll be a big thing so Jungkook needs a fancy piece for that as well.”
“That soon?” Jungkook asks.
“Yeah, it got pushed early,” Seokjin replies.
Jungkook asks you to check his calendar for any activities in the Singapore office, and you state that there’s nothing scheduled during that time. 
“There’s a landscape designer I want to meet while I’m there. Schedule one with her later,” Jungkook instructs you, and you make a note to coordinate with Lucas, who will continue to serve as the assigned assistant for the Vice President’s Southeast Asia trips. 
Taehyung finishes the rough designs quickly, given that he’s already familiar with the style his client wants. He’s done a lot of Jungkook’s suits, which you know from all the weeks of preparing his clothes, and you do admit that he looks best in these custom-made pieces.
As Taehyung takes Jungkook’s measurements - given that, as per his words, Jungkook has gotten wider since the last time - he asks if you have something to wear for those big events, too. 
“Uh, yes,” you say. 
“Are they from company events from before?” Taehyung asks.
You nod shyly. It’s not like you’re paid enough to afford a new one every time nor can you wear them anywhere else; there aren’t exactly regular fancy dinners and social occasions you get invited to.
“Have new ones made, then,” Jungkook says, his back turned to you.
“Uh, there’s no need, Mr. Jeon. The gowns still look new and they’re well-made,” you insist.
“Store-bought?” Taehyung asks, his eyebrow cocked.
“Uh, yes, Mr. Kim.”
“Nothing beats custom-designed ones though. And I must say, I’m kinda good at them.”
“I, uh… it’s really not necessary,” you stutter, feeling a little too shy and definitely undeserving. It’s Kim Taehyung; his name is the brand.
“I believe it is,” Jungkook says now, turning to you. “They’re big events and we’re organizing one with the arts professionals. Some dignitaries will be coming, too, including the culture minister. I’d prefer if you looked the part of working for the Vice President, Ms. Cho. You represent me in that way.”
“I… uh, okay,” you sigh, knowing you don’t seem to be in a position to turn him down. 
“Great. Start thinking of designs, then!” Taehyung beams.
It’s some minutes later when Jungkook’s measurements have been taken and Taehyung calls for you. You sit on the chair facing his desk not far away while Jungkook and Seokjin talk about sports and this new club that opened in Gangnam. 
Seated in front of you, Taehyung takes his sketch pad and starts asking what design you want.
“Something simple and comfortable since I’ll be moving around,” you say softly. “And nothing form-fitting or revealing since, uh…”
“I understand,” Taehyung smiles, revealing a gentle side of him that the paparazzi and tabloids clearly don’t capture. 
He starts drawing your silhouette, glancing at you then at Jungkook before speaking.
“So, he’s been in this role for a few weeks now. Has he been nice?”
“Define ‘nice,’” you respond, earning you a chuckle. 
“I guess that’s my answer, then.”
“I don’t mean to say he isn’t,” you backtrack. “Mr. Jeon just has a different leadership style as Mr. Jung’s, that’s all.”
“I suppose that’s quite a difficult adjustment for you, huh?”
You purse your lips and Taehyung laughs, the soft way he does it is something new and refreshing to you. You didn’t realize how deprived you are of such gentleness, of such acts or sights as simple as a smile. Hoseok is no longer your source. Your team hasn’t been as jolly these past weeks. The only other person you talk to regularly at work is Yoongi, and while he’s definitely been smiling more, it’s a lot more teasing than it is comforting. You’ve been missing your best friends more because of that, you think - Soomin’s smile is blinding, Jimin’s is sweet and infectious. Perhaps it’s why you haven’t been smiling much yourself. 
“I won’t tell, don’t worry,” Taehyung assures you. “I just wanted to check on him. This whole move has been tough but he doesn’t say much. I’m guessing he doesn’t tell you, either, but he’ll definitely show it.”
“He has, actually,” you say softly, knowing now that even with his closest friends, Jungkook tends to keep things to himself. “He’s pretty stressed most days, always working and stuff. He’s been a little hard on me but I guess that’s a natural reaction for some.”
“That’s not an excuse though.”
“It isn’t, but… it’s okay. I can handle it.”
It’s not as much of a lie anymore as it used to be. Jungkook hasn’t been overly critical about things as he was just last week. He rarely makes comments on your minutes now, doesn’t correct the reports you reviewed, doesn’t talk over you or doesn’t yell. There’s been a change, definitely, and you wonder what triggered it. 
“He doesn’t really smile, does he?” You ask, your curiosity getting the better of you.
Taehyung’s laughter is one of disbelief and pure amusement, catching the attention of the other two men but he waves them off. 
“He still does, just not as much,” he responds. “It kinda stopped after the breakup with Chaerin but I guess that’s what heartbreak does, right?”
“I… wouldn’t know. I’ve never experienced it,” you shrug.
“Lucky,” he hums. “I don’t wish it on anyone.”
You glance at Jungkook, briefly letting yourself imagine a version of him that’s a lot more carefree, relaxed, perhaps happy. Maybe it’s the loneliness and that you’d understand; that, you’ve experienced. It’s both liberating and isolating. You wonder if that’s how he’s been feeling all these years since then.
“I’m done,” Taehyung announces, showing you three designs that are exactly what you asked for. 
“These look nice. And way out of my price range,” you laugh.
“Perks of having a rich boss,” he winks. “I don’t want you to worry about anything, okay? You’re my client and I want you to wear these with confidence. Now, if you’re okay with all this, I’ll get one of my female assistants to get your measurements.”
You nod in response. There’s absolutely nothing you would change about those designs. And if you’re being honest, you now can’t wait for those events just so you could wear them. Hoseok had obviously paid for the gowns you had to wear for the big events, but those were store-bought that A-yeong helped you choose. Some were your own purchases, but this is the first time that you’re getting measured for custom-made clothing designed by Kim Taehyung. 
You walk towards the fitting room at the corner where one of his staff meets you. She’s meticulous, which is why it takes longer than usual just to get this done. With her silence, however, you’re able to hear the conversation happening outside, with the brothers now asking Jungkook about the same thing you’ve been wondering about.
“By the way, what was up with you last Monday?” Seokjin asks. “I thought that was gonna be night 4 of you going home with a new woman. But you passed out before you could even ask. And that was just 9PM.”
“Four nights isn’t much, though,” Taehyung laughs. “Didn’t he do that with seven women on seven straight nights when he was in Singapore? That was wild. Was it that stressful there? Or were there just so many to choose from?”
“Shut up. I’m not proud of that,” Jungkook groans. “And that was one time. It never happened again.”
“It never happened seven times straight again,” Seokjin corrects. “You were really living your life out there, huh? Stressful job, a rooftop bar in your apartment building, chauffeur and butler services 24/7, women from all over the world begging to sleep with you…”
“It’s called the post-break up stage,” Taehyung says. 
“For six years?!” Seokjin asks incredulously. “It’s either you loved Chaerin that much, you blamed yourself too much, or you just really sucked at moving on.”
“I vote all of the above,” Taehyung states.
“Me, too,” Seokjin claims.
“Fuck you both,” Jungkook groans again. 
“I think he also just missed us too much,” Seokjin adds. “Lucas was cleaning up your messes every time, not snapping you out of it. But we’re here now so I guess three straight nights is as far as you’ll go.”
“Two, if you stopped me last Sunday,” Jungkook points out. “You both always insisted that Sundays are a no-no. You were too busy with your own women.”
“May we remind you that you didn’t even make it to our table. You stepped foot in the bar then left five minutes later,” Taehyung says. “But really, what was it about Monday? You seemed angrier than usual.”
“Just… a bunch of things my father said,” Jungkook huffs.
“Did he tell you off again?”
“Not really, surprisingly. He just delivered a message basically, about what the board members were saying about me and my project. Bullshit stuff, you know? I just wanted to forget about it.”
“Did you?”
“Sorta,” Jungkook says. “I still don’t want to talk about it.”
“But it’s still happening, right?” Taehyung asks worriedly. “The Arts Center, I mean. You’ve been wanting to work on that since the building was abandoned five years ago.”
“I don’t know,” Jungkook responds. “I guess. We already put money into it. I’ll just have to make concessions if my father doesn’t side with me on this. I hate to think he’s buying into what those old folks are saying.”
“Ms. Cho, we’re all done,” the staff member tells you, muffling the conversation outside that you couldn’t help but hear. 
It felt quite intrusive, hearing how life was like for Jungkook in Singapore, but then again, his personal life seemed to be the topic in the office comfort rooms, and you don’t know how to feel about getting confirmation about those rumors. It felt sad more than anything though, living that kind of life away from friends and family. You wouldn’t know what moving on from a breakup feels like, but you suppose people grieve a lost love in their own ways; you can’t blame them for how they choose to repair the parts of them that broke. 
But the bit about his conversation with his father is what bothers you. You’d hate to think that there’s a possibility that Jungkook’s plans won’t be fully realized, and whatever the reasons for that are, you hope they didn’t break his spirit too much. You know the plans now like the back of your hand and the more you learn, the more you believe in it. You hope Jungkook continues to believe in it, too.
You exit the fitting room, catching the end of a conversation where Seokjin suggests a wholesome weekend for the three men of just dinner and drinks. The two other men agree, and they all turn to you once you make your presence felt.
“All good?” Taehyung asks you.
“Yes,” you bow in thanks. 
“Great. The gowns will be ready at the same time as Jungkook’s suits will be. I’ll just let you guys know, okay?
“Sure,” Jungkook says. “But anyway, we have to get back to work. Thanks again.”
The brothers bid you and Jungkook goodbye, and you head back to the office with not much words said. Jungkook seems less frustrated, but the worry you feel suddenly returns. It’s the thought that maybe he doesn’t feel supported, that maybe what he’s doing isn’t enough, and that more than that, it's him choosing to deal with all this on his own, not even looking to his friends to comfort him.
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Jimin and Soomin meet you for lunch at a restaurant that Saturday afternoon. The drive from Busan took longer than expected, they said, but you say you don’t mind. They’re visiting you like they always do every month, regardless of how busy they are back in their hometown, which was your home for a few years, too.
You were in the same class; your mom worked at the school, which was the only reason why you were able to attend a prestigious one in the first place. Even when you moved back to Daegu, you remained in touch with them. Despite the distance, none of you wanted to just let the friendship fade, and even when they had to stay back and you made a life out here in Seoul, they made sure to visit you as much as they could.
They’re why you were excited for the weekend to come and now, you’ll be enjoying a hearty meal, getting your nails done after, lounging at your apartment, and then heading to a club for a night out, which you only do whenever they’re around. 
“So, has the boss situation improved?” Soomin asks, her eyes soft and laced with worry “Or should I storm the jerk’s house and give him a piece of my mind?”
“It has,” you chuckle. “So no need to call him names or fight anyone. I’m okay.”
“Well, you did call him a grumpy old grinch with nice hair the other week,” Jimin points out. “So… did he get a haircut?”
“No,” you laugh again. “And that was in the heat of the moment. I… I mean, he’s still grumpy but he’s not… as grumpy or unbearable. He’s been—”
“Oh hun, please don’t say he’s been kind and then give him a pass for how he’s been to you,” Soomin reprimands. “Mean people don’t just become nice all of a sudden. And if they do, that’s a controlling tactic - they want you to think they’re capable of change so you’ll soften up to them and then give them a pass every time they do asshole-y things again.”
“You watch too many shows,” you frown, although knowing her statement isn’t wrong; it’s just not something you can relate with Jungkook.
Sure, he hasn’t been the nicest, but he also hasn’t been the meanest. He’s just been… him, you suppose - a bit in the middle; frustrated at worst, quiet at best, stoic on most days. He does seem to live in his head a lot, and while you won’t go so far as characterizing him as kind, he definitely hasn’t been insufferable these past few days. 
“I’ve just dealt with too many assholes, ___,” Soomin corrects. “They’re all the same. Men are shit.”
“Except for Jimin,” you correct.
“Except for Jimin,” she concurs. 
“I accept the honor,” he bows. “But seriously, ___. How has it been? You… you seemed really sad last week and I would’ve driven here then if we didn’t have that work emergency.”
“I’m okay, I mean it. I’ve experienced worse,” you try to assure them.
“You do know that having experienced something worse doesn’t mean it’s fine for you to experience something bad again, right?” Soomin points out.
“I know, but it also means that I know my threshold for bad behavior,” you say. “Jungkook was in a lot of stress and I did mess up. But I think he’s making up for that.”
“By apologizing, you mean?” Soomin cocks an eyebrow.
Your sigh tells her that’s definitely not what Jungkook has done. 
“Well, he approves my minutes and reviewed reports much quicker,” you reason. “And he doesn’t comment as much. But actually, I think he just pities me. And that’s worse.”
“Why would he pity you?” She asks.
“I don’t know. Maybe because I said that a tree fell on our roof and that mom got injured the weekend before my mishap,” you explain. “And then he found out how early I start my day just so I can get to him on time. He’s made adjustments after those and I… I think he’s guilty or something. And he’s just not being his usual angry self around me to make it up to me.”
“So in short, he’s still kind of an asshole,” Soomin says, prompting Jimin to snort and you to pout. “He could always just apologize if he’s guilty and realized he should treat you better.”
“Some things aren’t easy for other people to say, you know?” You say softly. 
“That’s not an excuse,” she points out.
“It’s an explanation,” you counter. “Or one of them, I guess. I don’t know him well enough, but it’s better to think that he’s a decent person who just struggles with emotions than someone who willingly makes people’s lives difficult. I mean, that’s easier to manage and accept.”
“If that helps you deal and he’s indeed improving, then maybe I won’t have to storm his place then,” she smiles, taking your hand and kissing it as she likes to do. 
She knows your habit of pressing your nails onto your skin, and she always said she likes to remind you that you deserve gentleness, too; she’ll give it if you can’t give it to yourself. 
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The rest of the afternoon goes as you planned, with all the banter you’d expect from your best friends amid the pampering and then the chick flick in the background as you get ready in your tiny apartment. 
You smile at your reflection in the mirror. The high-waist trousers and sleeveless top ensemble is a refreshing sight for you, as you only really dress up like this for a night out. You’re in your usual pencil skirts and blouses otherwise, and in jeans and tops or oversized jumpers on a normal day. 
Soomin’s done your makeup and Jimin compliments you as he looks on, and soon enough, they’re ready as well to head out. 
“Where’re we going?” You ask from the passenger seat as Jimin navigates the busy streets of Seoul on a Saturday night. 
“Some new restaurant the guys discovered,” Soomin responds. “I think it’s not far from here.”
“Okay, good. Hajoon’s been texting, asking what time we’ll get there,” you tell them. 
“Geez, you were already with him last night. Tell him to be patient,” Jimin rolls his eyes. 
Soomin laughs from the backseat as she teases that he’s just being jealous, to which he points out that he just hasn’t seen you in a while so the man can wait. And you assure Jimin that you’d gladly skip a night with Hajoon to be with your best friends, no questions asked. 
You get there eventually, and you immediately spot the group because of the laughter coming from their table. There are four men; the two women are Soomin’s friends, which is how you got involved with Hajoon in the first place. You met some time last year and you’ve been hanging out with him since then - among other things - and you’ve been enjoying it, given the simplicity and lack of drama when he’s not being moody. He’s a warm body who knows how to use it and you’re a good type of relief, as he’d said; there’s really not much more you need as you just try to survive through life and make something out of yourself in however way you can. 
Hajoon waves at you from his seat, gesturing to his left to say he’s saved that spot for you. You head there after greeting your other friends, with Jimin and Soomin following you. 
Right as you sit down and greet the man next to you, you’re caught by surprise when he kisses your cheek and snakes his arm around your waist. 
“Hey, I missed you today,” Hajoon hums, smiling at you the way he did last night and this morning; it definitely wasn’t this sweet when he left for a work trip last month.  
“I… saw you today,” you frown, earning you a chuckle. 
“I know; I was still thinking about you, though,” he says. 
You give a smile - as genuine as you can make it - and then turn towards your friends to your left who are trying to hold in their laughter. 
You order a beer after he offers you a glass of wine, and then go for the pork belly when he says the salmon here is good. 
“Just craving for meat, that’s all,” you tell him. 
“Is there anything else you want? Just let me know, okay?”
You hum your yes and then turn back to your friends after Hajoon makes jokes with his.
“Since when was he this sweet to you?” Soomin whispers with wide, curious eyes. 
“Since never,” you reply. “I mean, we’ve never been affectionate outside of bed…”
“Is anything else different?” Jimin wonders, careful not to bring attention to your conversation.
You look back at how things were before Hajoon left and how it was when he was away. Nothing seemed different. You hung out at his place before he flew out, then you messaged each other every now and then during the one month he was abroad. He was more interested to talk, but given the time difference and the pressure and stress you’ve been under the past weeks, you didn’t bother much, neither did he. 
But you also think back to last night - how he picked you up from your apartment, which he’s never done before, and how he prepared a luxurious dinner. He made you breakfast this morning, too, whereas you both usually just sleep in in tangled limbs and then separate once you wake up.
“He cooked me fancy stuff but I just thought he wanted to show off what he learned during his cooking masterclass,” you shrug. “And well… he seemed sweeter than normal.”
“Maybe he hooked up with someone while he was away and he’s guilty about it,” Jimin suggests.
“He didn’t say anything about it and he knows I wouldn’t mind,” you say. “We’re not exclusive, even if I don’t hang out with other guys.”
“Maybe he’s over the fucking and wants to do the loving bit now,” Soomin offers. “I mean, he always seemed more into you than you were into him.”
“He’s hot and decent when he’s in a good mood; that’s all I need,” you admit. 
“But honestly, that’s probably it,” Soomin continues. “I think he’s hinting that he wants to be more.”
“But I don’t want to,” you whine. “I’m not ready.”
“You’re 30! When are you ever gonna be ready?” Soomin whisper-yells.
“Never!” You pout now. “I mean… Not with him.”
“Well, you’re gonna have to tell him soon, then,” Jimin sighs. “Before it gets messy. And you hate messy.”
“What if men just don’t have feelings?” Soomin wonders out loud. “That way, you can’t hurt them.”
“So that way, they can hurt you?” Jimin points out. “No. I’m not letting any men hurt either one of you, okay? I love you both too much.”
“We know,” you and Soomin say at the same time. 
“But I agree with Jimin, ___. You’re gonna have to let that man next to you, who’s thankfully deaf, go. And then just find another person who can give you what you need,” Soomin continues. “Like, uh…” 
She looks around the semi-packed restaurant to find some random man to just point to, her eyes widening in awe as she spots a table close by with the type of men she was just thinking about. 
“Like them.” 
You laugh at her, not taking her seriously, but still, you look towards the direction of her cocked head, only to feel your throat dry up and your heartbeat speed up. Your eyes widen in reflex as they meet the piercing gaze of the man who’d given you a headache for weeks. He also happens to look unfairly handsome in his white top and slicked back hair. 
“Shit, I would totally go for them,” Soomin adds, “and I only even like men a quarter of the time.”
Your best friends look at you as they wait for a response, only to see a nervous look on your face, as if you’re seeing a ghost or something, and the way you turn to them and stutter almost seems like you are.
From the other table, Jungkook pants quietly. You finally looked his way, and he didn’t know what to expect your reaction to be - maybe a bit of shock, but definitely not this worried. Granted, you’re out with your friends at a restaurant that he and his friends frequent. It’s not the type of place they’d normally go for - this is a lot simpler, less private, and more accommodating than the exclusive restaurants and hotels they go to for dinners before heading to a club. But Jungkook loves their pork belly; he orders it every week, and tonight, he was craving for this specifically before going to a private party of one of Taehyung’s clients. 
Jungkook had seen you when you sat down, and he’d been taken aback when the guy to your right immediately kissed your cheek; it seems he’s barely let go of your waist since then, too. Perhaps the man is your boyfriend - and Jungkook doesn’t know what made him think you wouldn’t have one - but it also seems that the one to your left is into you, too, at least based on how he smiles at you sweetly but rolls his eyes at the affectionate guy to your other side. 
But other than the embarrassing obvious affection that both of them are directing at you, what made him lose his senses is how you look, and you’re even more beautiful than he imagined. Your hair is styled, your makeup is bolder than usual, and he won’t even start with how you’re dressed. It’s a lot more skin than he’s used to - you’re out, after all, and if he’ll go by what your companions are wearing, he supposes this is your stop before heading to some club to party, too. Whereas when you’re at work, you have the skirt and long-sleeved blouse ensemble that you wear everyday - still pretty, perhaps just a lot more reserved than what he’s seeing now. 
He can’t take his eyes off you, even as you entertain your suppose-boyfriend, even when you engage in hushed conversation with the man and woman to your left, and even when you stare back at him, the initial shock now wearing down to a look of curiosity. Perhaps you’re wondering why he keeps glancing at you, too.
“I told you he’s got it bad,” Taehyung laughs from the other side of the table. 
He’s noticed how his friend hasn’t said much in the last 10 minutes, his gaze directed at the loud table close by. One glance and Taehyung knew why. 
“Well, we told him,” Seokjin corrects. “He only ever acts out when he’s threatened and he’s apparently threatened by his pretty assistant.”
“I’m not acting out,” Jungkook scowls, finally breaking the staring contest with you.
“You’ve never been this much of a jerk,” Seokjin says. “So yes, you’re acting out.”
Jungkook ignores them, his eyes turning back to you, and finds you downing two shots of tequila consecutively, then using the beer as your chaser. His knuckles unconsciously clench when your suppose-boyfriend scoots closer, whispering something in your ear, his lips grazing your skin. 
Jungkook exhales deeply, trying to get a grip of himself. He’s acting foolishly. You obviously have a life outside of work, and it obviously includes going out for dinner and drinks with friends, having a boyfriend, and enjoying your youth the way he is. There’s a world outside of the routine you’ve both created, of the silence you both share, and the time you spend together, unknowingly learning about each other without meaning to, without wanting to.
“___,” Soomin calls your name one more time. 
“Huh?” You answer, finally tearing your eyes away from Jungkook, who’d unfortunately captured your attention after you noticed he was there. 
You’ve been used to his impeccable looks in his fancy suits; you’ve even gotten used to his tank top and sweatpants post-workout outfits every morning, and while you’re still not immune to that look, his night out wear fit for a party leaves you more choked up than normal. 
Maybe it’s the black jeans that you spot as he sits on the edge of the couch, or the white button-up top with the rolled sleeves up to his elbow, or his haircut that makes him look a little more mature. Maybe it’s all that and the way he’s gazing at you, the look in his eyes something you can’t quite read. Perhaps like you, he’s surprised to see you here the way you’re shocked that he’d chosen this place to eat; it’s not exactly a fancy restaurant you know he likes eating at. 
But he’s here, and so are you, and suddenly you feel exposed, as if the world outside of work that you’ve kept to yourself is baring open to the man who stands at the center of what you do everyday. And you’re not sure how you feel about that.
“I was just saying… those men are pretty hot and they look interested, too,” Soomin wiggles her eyebrows. “ I mean, they keep looking here.”
“One of them is my boss,” you finally say. “Guy on the right. That’s… uh, that’s Jungkook.”
“Holy fuck, hun,” Soomin chokes on her drink. “Why did you leave out the part about your rude boss being a fucking god?”
“Does it matter?” Jimin scowls. “He’s still rude.”
“It’s different when the guy’s hot. It makes the anger more intense, you know?” Soomin says. “Attractive people elicit more passionate feelings sometimes.”
“Excuse me, that’s not why I was angry,” you pout. “He was really being unfair.”
“Well, he was. But I think my point also applies,” Soomin argues. “I’d just like to warn you that workplace hotties are a menace. Except for Yoongi - he was heaven sent. ”
“Ah, the man who could’ve been,” Jimin sighs. “We at least knew he wouldn’t hurt you. He didn’t seem like the type.”
“Yeah, this dude over here is hot but he’s mean. And that’s your type,” Soomin smirks.
“Can we… not talk about this while he’s there? And while this other dude is right next to me?” You glare at your friends, especially at Soomin whose insinuation wasn’t lost on you. “It’s so… weird.”
“Hey, we’re here for you, okay?” Jimin softens as he looks at you. “Just let us know if one of them makes you feel uncomfortable. We can always just stay at your place and watch horror movies until morning and you and Soomin can lose your voices from screaming and then I’ll lose my hearing because of it.”
His words make you laugh. There’s a tenderness in Jimin that you’ve never heard from anyone else before. Even when he’s telling you to stop yelling because you live for the thrill of a jumpscare, he says it so tenderly while laughing before pulling you both in his embrace. 
“I’m okay. I’m just… I don’t know, probably just not used to seeing him somewhere that isn’t the office or his home,” you reason. “And I feel a bit exposed, I guess. This is my world and his is… right there.”
You wrap your arms around your body subconsciously, realizing only you’d done it when Jimin asks if you’re cold, offering his jacket then taking it back because Hajoon might smack him or something.
You turn it down, knowing you actually feel hot more than anything. You’re dressed up and definitely dressed in less, and somehow having Jungkook see you like this is oddly making you shy, perhaps a little too conscious.
“Just don’t mind him,” Soomin advises. “It’s a restaurant. You obviously have a social life and he can’t fault you for it, nor make you feel weird about it. Just focus on us, okay? Or on Hajoon, if that’ll happen.”
You follow her words and try to block out Jungkook. You do slightly nod at him, as well as at Taehyung and Seokjin just to acknowledge their presence, but you continue on with your meal, as the dishes arrive soon after. 
The pork belly is a winner; you’ll probably come back here for that alone. You do manage to dodge Hajoon’s attempts at feeding you, and your other friends engage with the three of you at the other end of the table. It’s going well for the most part, until Hajoon starts to act a little wary, a little tense.
“Hey,” he says, leaning close to you. “The guy on the other table has been looking at you all night. It’s kinda annoying.”
You glance at Jungkook’s table and he looks away when you do. “Oh, just don’t mind him,” you wave Hajoon off. “Maybe I remind him of someone or something.”
There’s a beat of silence, and you feel him tense even more, as you look up and see that he’s staring down the man on the other side. Hajoon’s had a bit to drink, and you know he tends to be cocky and irrational when he is. You groan once he shakes his head, saying he’s gonna give “that stranger” a piece of his mind because “he can’t be looking at my girl like that.”
The initial annoyance you feel turns into panic once he stands from his seat and storms to the other table. You follow him, with your friends just looking in worry. His friends are more encouraging of what he wants to do though. 
“What the fuck is your problem staring at my girl like that?” Hajoon mumbles, acting all tough when he’s never threatened nor confronted anyone like this, even when he’s drunk. 
Jungkook seems taken aback. Perhaps it’s the aggression he didn’t expect, or maybe it’s finally having to acknowledge your presence in the restaurant, just in an unfortunate way. 
“Your girl?” He scoffs. 
The way the man is speaking to him is quite annoying, but he also knows your boyfriend is slightly drunk, so he dismisses him because Jungkook doesn’t need this drama tonight, especially not in front of you. 
Hajoon hates the way this stranger is looking at him and not taking him seriously. He’d seen how he kept glancing at you, perhaps trying to get your attention away from him, and he’s really had enough. His words are slurring but this is the courage he needs to stand up for you. You’ve said before how unwanted attention makes you uncomfortable, and he’s gonna do something about it before the man gets to try anything with you. 
“Yeah, my girl. You seem to have a problem with that, don’t you?” Hajoon grunts. 
“My only problem is you making a scene right now,” Jungkook shakes his head. “You’re drunk and insecure and you’re embarrassing yourself in front of your girl.”
Not that you expected him to back off, but you didn’t actually think that Jungkook would further press Hajoon’s buttons. The man is drunk and insecure and indeed embarrassing, but getting told so is a blow to the ego, especially in your presence. And so you’re not surprised that this just makes him angrier, and since you’ve never dealt with this version of him before, you don’t know how to pacify him.
You didn’t actually think that Hajoon had a daring bone in his body despite being the way he is, but when he attempts to lunge at Jungkook, you’re left in disbelief. You’re quick enough to pull Hajoon back before he lands a fist on the other man’s face, but he’d been worked up enough that he hits the glass of wine on the table, knocking it over and causing the drink to spill on Jungkook’s thin white top. 
“Mr. Jeon!” You shriek, pulling Hajoon back more forcefully before pushing him to the side so you can get ahead. 
You take the napkin from the table and wipe Jungkook’s wet clothed torso, slowing down immediately as you realize what exactly it is you’re doing. 
“I… uh,” you stutter, standing straight up and mirroring his questioning eyes. 
It was a reflex for you, considering that you constantly make sure that he’s dressed impeccably. 
“You know him?!” Hajoon asks in disbelief, tugging on your hand now so you’ll turn to him.
“He’s my boss, you idiot!” smacking him on the chest as you glare at him. “And you just put my job in jeopardy and for what?”
“Well, what can he do?” Hajoon challenges. “Get you fired because of me? Does he own the company and shit?”
“My father does,” Jungkook responds. “And I’m the Vice President.”
Hajoon just rolls his eyes but you aren’t amused. You glance at your table and gesture for one of his friends to take him, so one of them does. He stands up and pulls Hajoon away before he can do or say anything else.
“I’m so, so sorry, Mr. Jeon,” you say, your head bowed down as you apologize. “I…” 
The mess on his outfit is too much; the red has stained the white top and you know he feels sticky. He looks like he has somewhere to go after this and that makes it worse.
“I– I can call Mr. Ri to get the car in here. I can get extra clothes from your travel bag,” you say, knowing that Jungkook always has a bag filled with clothes for emergency flights or check-ins. 
You get your phone and make a call, telling Jungkook that his chauffeur will be here soon. You glance towards your friends who are still pacifying a drunk Hajoon, and you decide that they can handle all that. Right now, your priority is Jungkook.
You walk out towards the car that’s on hazard mode outside the restaurant and pick out the top that’s most appropriate for a night out, which happens to be a semi-loose black button-up. You head back inside, with Taehyung and Seokjin informing you that Jungkook has gone to the washroom, so you scurry towards there and knock at the door.
“Mr. Jeon, I have your black long sleeves here,” you say as your knuckles tap on the wood. “Just tell me–” 
You’re interrupted by the sudden opening of the door, the sight of Jungkook in his jeans hanging by his waist and his unbuttoned white top catching you by surprise. His hair’s a bit damp and so is his bare torso, as you see that he’s tried to clean the wine off his body. 
You catch yourself looking longer than you should, and you immediately look away as you hand him over what he needs. 
“Please let me know what else you need, sir,” you say, your eyes glued to the pretty wallpaper as you awkwardly stand outside the washroom. 
“Jungkook,” he says, earning him a curious look. “I mean, you don’t need to be formal. We’re not at work.”
You nod, realizing it does sound weird to address him as such in a casual setting. 
“Okay… Jungkook,” you mumble, but even the way it rolls off your tongue is a bit odd. You’re not used to it, and you hope you won’t ever be. 
He closes the door and you take this time to calm yourself down. You’ve been so worried since you saw the glass tip over and mess up his outfit, and given his hot-headedness, you’re a little surprised that he didn’t fight back. He does have a reputation to uphold but even then, stopping himself from punching Hajoon must’ve taken a lot. 
The door opens and you sigh in relief; his outfit still looks good and he’s fully clothed, so there’s no lingering looks this time anymore. You take the top that he gives you, and you take the chance to apologize.
“I’m so sorry,” you start. “I don’t know why he— I mean, he’s a bit drunk and he’s not usually like this.”
“You’re not the one who should apologize so don’t,” he responds. 
“Well, he won’t apologize so I will.”
“You didn’t spill the drink and you didn’t come at me. That was him,” he counters. 
You just shrug, choosing to just concede. “I’ll just return this to Mr. Ri.”
He calls your name before you turn around to leave. 
“I didn’t mean to cause a rift between you and your boyfriend,” he says, much too low and too gentle than you’re used to. “I hope I didn’t ruin anything.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” you answer softly. “We just, uh, we just hang out.”
You don’t know why you feel the need to correct this misinformation. Maybe you just want to remind yourself because you’re not anyone’s anything; hearing Hajoon claim you as yours made you want to just create that distance even more.
Jungkook wants to push it, to ask more. The man clearly acts like he’s your lover, given the physical affection and the way he tried to stand up for you. But there’s a bit of shame as you state that you and the man “just hang out,” and there’s that wonder he feels - how can you be with someone without being with them, and if turning away people who are clearly into you is a tendency you have. There’s Min Yoongi, after all, who’d liked you enough to remain as your friend when you needed one despite how he felt.  
“Okay then,” Jungkook nods. “And your job’s not in jeopardy. Don’t take responsibility for a stupid act you didn’t do.”
You bow in thanks, not much used to this side of him that’s understanding and even calm. You suppose he’d seen you worry about your job, had seen you look embarrassed over something that you didn’t even do, and perhaps he saw the discomfort over how Hajoon was talking about you. 
You’re about to walk out of the hallway when his call of your name stops you again, prompting you to turn around.
“About earlier… did I… did I make you feel uncomfortable?” He asks, the worry in his voice surprising you. 
You debate over playing it down or telling the truth, but you go with the latter. 
“A… a little,” you admit, looking away. 
You hear him sigh, and there’s a look of guilt in his eyes as you turn to him. 
“I’m so—”
The footsteps of another diner in the hallway disrupts him, and you both make way so he can use the washroom, too. Perhaps you and Jungkook had taken so long, and you don’t want others to conspire about what’s happening, so you walk out and tell him again that you’ll just return his clothing to Mr. Ri. 
From your table, Soomin and Jimin watch the awkwardness of your parting of ways, with you scurrying out the door and Jungkook returning to his seat with a deep sigh before glaring at Hajoon.
“He does sound and look like an asshole, aside from being hot,” Soomin observes. “That’s totally ___’s type.”
“Are you saying she likes her boss?” Jimin asks incredulously. 
“I’m just saying that’s her type, not that she likes him,” Soomin corrects. “There’s a difference. I still hate him for making things hard for her. I wish he would stop treating her like that. You and I know she won’t quit anytime soon. Especially because he’s a Jeon.”
“I know,” Jimin sighs. “I wish we could protect her from all this, too. But she’s always done what she wanted to do. And we wait for her to tell us when things are hard; we just hold her hand whenever it is.”
“That’s all we can do, I guess,” Soomin responds. “Sometimes though I wish she’d just… let someone else do more than just hold her hand, you know? It could’ve been Yoongi, or even Hajoon before all this mess. It could’ve been you.”
“You know that’ll never happen,” Jimin laughs bitterly, with Soomin knowing exactly what he means. “You’re only ever just her friend or her lover; you can’t be both.”
Soomin hums in agreement, as she’d seen you draw the line with the men you’d come across with. You’d make it clear if friendship is all you want; you’d be straightforward if it’s just sex you’re seeking. You give either just your heart or your body and you’re always careful not to give both. There are parts of you that you don’t want to share, that you don’t want to expose to them; there’s a kind of hurt that you don’t want to experience. 
They watch you walk back inside and then head to their table, where you sit next to a buzzed Hajoon who still has half a mind to look at you guiltily. 
“I think I’ll head back home after this,” you tell the group. “Kinda not in a partying mood anymore.”
Your other friends apologize on Hajoon’s behalf, proceeding to ask you if that was really your boss and if he’d threatened your job because of it, remarking that it would be such an asshole move of him to do that or to even get mad at you for something you didn’t do. 
You come to Jungkook’s defense; he didn’t say anything to that effect at all. Perhaps you’d been the unfair one who assumed that he would - that he’d demand that you apologize, that he’d use this against you. 
“He’s… not like that,” you say, meaning it. You turn to your best friends who have disagreeing looks. “He… he tried to apologize for making me feel uncomfortable,” you say softly. “No one’s ever done that before.”
“Look, ___,” Hajoon starts, but you cut him off. 
“I don’t really wanna talk about it,” you sigh. “I’ll just pay my bill and head out.”
You, Soomin, and Jimin all pay accordingly and then leave the restaurant, with you turning to Jungkook and his friends, bowing as a form of goodbye.
“Hey, why don’t we buy desserts at a convenience store and have our own party at your place?” Jimin suggests as you all settle in his car. 
“That would be nice,” you hum. “This outfit wouldn’t be such a waste then.”
So that’s what you do, as your best friends treat you to all the snacks you love - a usual occurrence, really, as they used to do that back in Busan to cheer you up during the days when you were feeling sad. It’s one of the things that you allow them to spoil you with and they take advantage of that, as you go home with weeks’ worth of goods for you to enjoy.
You also picked up some drinks on the way, so you play some music and dance around with your wine glasses and take shots in between. It’s too early to be drunk but 11PM might as well be 3AM. You’re all seated snugly in your tiny couch as you watch some variety show on mute, laughing at the hosts' antics even if you can’t hear anything. 
“Tonight wasn’t so bad,” you huff, leaning on Soomin’s shoulder as you doze off. “Both of you are all I need. Thank you for never disappointing me.”
They know you don’t always let yourself be this sentimental. They also know that when you do, all you want is for them to listen and to hold you. And that’s what they do, as you eventually clean up and fall asleep on the mattress with them, the events from earlier slowly fading away.
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yanderestarangel · 3 months
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A/N:That's a really hot request! I love writing gang!bang x reader, sorry if it's a little bad, I did my best, sorry if it was too long too - thanks for the request<3
| PS: The nominations for each 'Bi Han' are: 'OG!Bi Han' - bi han from the reader's 'original' timeline, 'Titan!Bi Han' - bi han from the alternative timeline who appears at the end of the game helping liu kang in some endings, 'Dark!Bi Han' - fully corrupted bi han and also from an alternate reality. |
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 TW: v!sex, handjob,oral (f!re), double!blowjob, cum!play, face!fuck, they/them used, voyeurism, exhibitionism, threesome, gang bang, sub reader, aggressive sex, praise, degradation, dumbfication, afab anatomy, titan!bi han,og!bi han, dark!bi han x reader , sub!reader, smut, nsfw, little plot in final cut.
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⸺ It would be an understatement to say that you weren't surprised when you saw your boyfriend take two people to your house, but they weren't two strangers... They were versions of himself. He introduced you to 'Titan Bi Han' a wiser, calmer and softer version of him, he was the same as your companion... But as if all the qualities were gathered only in him, without the 'rotten' part that the grandmaster had - and Soon after, it was the turn of 'Dark Bi Han', the totally corrupted version of him, however, there was still something that shone there, something that only you knew.
You didn't question at first what everyone was doing there, after all, you trusted your boyfriend, but you soon realized that it wasn't just a (a) normal visit... By the way each look devoured you... After all, Bi Han was a man jealous, but it was okay to share your partner, if you with other versions of himself... Right? You tried to protest a little... Telling your boyfriend - 'OG!Bi Han' that it was too much to have three men in your body at once, but they soon reassured you... Well, not all of them.
⸺ OG!Bi Han smiled, his eyes darkening with desire as he approached you. "-Don't worry, love. We'll take it slow and make sure you're comfortable every step of the way," he said, his voice low and seductive. Titan!Bi Han nodded, a gentle smile on his face. "-Yes, we want you to enjoy every moment, darling. We'll make sure to please you in ways you've never imagined," he murmured, his fingers gently tracing your arm.
Dark!Bi Han, on the other hand, wore a wicked grin as he closed the distance between you. His touch was rough, his fingers gripping your chin to tilt your head back. "-I don't care about your comfort, little one. I want to ravish you, use you for my pleasure," he growled, his breath hot against your ear. The contrast between the three versions of your boyfriend heightened the anticipation and excitement coursing through your veins.
OG!Bi Han leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a soft, teasing kiss. "-We'll start with something simple doll face," he whispered, his voice dripping with anticipation. His hands wandered, one slipping beneath your shirt to caress your breasts, while the other trailed down to tease the sensitive skin at the hem of your pants.
Titan! Han's touch was tender as he pressed himself against your back, his hands trailing along your curves. He nibbled on your earlobe, sending shivers down your spine. "-I want to explore every inch of your body, my love. To worship you and make you feel incredible," he murmured, his voice filled with adoration for you.
Dark!Bi Han's touch was possessive and demanding, his fingers digging into your hips as he pressed his body against yours. "-You're mine to use, to fuck, little thing.." he growled, his breath hot against your neck. His lips traveled down, leaving a trail of cold kisses along your collarbone - They took their time, savoring every moment, as they brought you closer to the edge of pleasure with their skilled touches and sinful whispers. You were surrounded by a whirlwind of desire, lost in a sea of pleasure that only intensified with each passing second - As the intensity built, OG!Bi Han took the lead, guiding you to the bed, he positioned himself between your legs, his hands gently parting your folds as he leaned in to taste you. His tongue flicked against your clit, sending a jolt of pleasure through your body his lips closed around your sensitive bud, sucking and teasing it with expert precision.
Meanwhile, Dark!Bi Han held his throbbing cock in front of your mouth, his fingers tangling in your hair as he guided himself between your lips. His length filled your mouth, stretching you as you eagerly took him in. Your tongue swirled around him, tasting his salty essence as you bobbed your head, taking him deeper with each rhythmic movement. Dark!Bi Han groaned with satisfaction, his hips rocking gently against your mouth. "-I've missed you more than words can express... And I'm going to fuck you until you're completely ruined, completely mine." - You hadn't understood his comment... yet. You decided to focus on pleasure, even though that phrase was playing in your mind, you tried to read the ghostly eyes of that corrupted version of your partner, but you found nothing but longing and lust.
Titan!Bi Han, not wanting to be left out, positioned himself next to you, his hand wrapping around his erect shaft. He moaned softly as you took control, your fingers gliding along his length, applying just the right amount of pressure to drive him wild. You could feel the heat radiating from his cock, the pre-cum slick against your fingertips as you stroked him, matching the pace of your mouth on Dark!Bi Han. "-Fuck..mmpmh- you're so pretty- yes... Just like that baby" OG!Bi Han increased the pressure of his tongue against your clit, his movements becoming more urgent and deliberate. Dark!Bi Han groaned, his hips thrusting into your mouth as he neared his climax. Titan!Bi Han's grip tightened around your hand, "-Yes fuck- I'm going to cum, keep those pretty little hands around my dick... fuck you're so good at this my bunny..."
And then, in a glorious crescendo, pleasure washed over all of you. Your body convulsed with ecstasy as your orgasm crashed through you, waves of lust radiating from your core. Dark!Bi Han released his load into your mouth, his hips jerking with each spurt of cum. Titan!Bi Han's cock pulsed in your hand, warm cum spilling over your fingers. And OG!Bi Han continued to lap at your sensitive clit, prolonging the pleasure until you were left breathless and spent. "-This isn't over yet doll..." He wasted no time in taking you on all fours, positioning himself behind you. Your body quivered with anticipation as he lined himself up with your wet entrance. With a firm thrust, he plunged into you, filling you completely. A gasp escaped your lips. Dark!Bi Han, ever the dominant one, stood before you, his eyes filled with a primal hunger. He relished in the power he held over you, his voice dripping with a deliciously degrading tone. "-You are an insatiable little whore.." he growled, his words sending shivers down your spine. "-Take his cock like a good little fucktoy. Show us how much you crave it."
Dark!Bi Han and Titan!Bi Han positioned themselves in front of you, their erect members proudly on display. You wanted to please them both, to take them deep into your mouth and show them the desire and passion you felt. With determination, you took them both in your hands, feeling their warmth and hardness against your skin. Your lips parted, and you eagerly engulfed both their cocks, alternating between them, giving equal attention to each. The taste of their arousal filled your mouth, their moans of lust spurring you on. As you struggled to accommodate both of them, your mouth stretched wide, taking in the delicious sensation of their lengths moving against your tongue. It was a delicious torment, the dual pleasure of being filled by both Dark!Bi Han and TiTan!Bi Han, their hands gently threading through your hair, guiding you with each rhythmic movement. You could hear praises being moaned and whispered, your knees hurt, your eyes were streaming tears and your pussy was drooling on OG!Bi Han's cock, you were being filled by all of them, the hot and cold sensation would almost make you pass out, if not it was the painful and delicious occupation of the dicks of the alternative versions of the grandmaster. Dark!Bi Han's hips bucked, a low groan escaping his lips, as he spilled his essence into your mouth. The taste of his release was both familiar and new, a delicious reminder of the intimacy you shared. Titan!Bi Han followed suit, the intensity of his orgasm, but he withdrew from your mouth, cumming on your face, and giving a light erotic slap with his cum-stained dick on your face.
"-Cum in their cunt... breed them like the little slut they are..." Dark!Bi Han told his counterpart, who started fucking you with all his intensity again, you couldn't take it anymore, looking for support in Titan!Bi Han while your cyromancer boyfriend filled you with cum, making you cry with pleasure. Your body hurt so much, you actually felt like you were going to pass out, as you saw a melancholy look coming surprisingly from the corrupted version of your boyfriend... Dark!Bi Han, a chaste kiss was left on your cheek by him, while Titan!Bi Han spoke something for the original version of your boyfriend, a 'I'm sorry' was whispered by the dark ninja, a small tear was left by him on your sweaty skin. You managed to regain consciousness and put together some loose sentences spoken by Asian men - you realized that your boyfriend, had allowed both to experience you intimately because in their reality, your version had tragically passed away. You were the only living version of yourself left, and they sought solace and connection with you, the closest thing to the love they had lost. Your heart found as you absorbed the weight of their sorrow. It was a bittersweet revelation - You reached out, your hand trembling slightly, and cupped Dark!Bi Han's cheek, his hand finding its place on your other cheek. His touch was gentle... but cold...deadly cold, his voice filled with pain. "-Thank you.. It means more than you can imagine."
You soon saw the two versions leave with your boyfriend, both giving advice and strategies on how to prevent your death... but they knew that deep down, there were fates worse than death, and that unfortunately... fate is inevitable.
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©YANDERESTARANGEL 2023
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haknom · 3 months
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STARS AND RAINDROPS — PARK JAY
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꒰ PLAY’S SCRIPT ꒱ ⪩ Park Jay was well aware of the rivalry between his basketball team and the drama club, yet he couldn’t bring himself to hate them. He loved drama, and of course, he couldn’t express that to anyone. Upon hearing about the auditions for their new play, he only felt thrilled. He was good at hiding secrets, so signing up wouldn’t be that hard, right? Well, it wouldn't be if you, the club leader, weren’t practically everywhere.
꒰ CASTING ꒱ ⪩ bball-team-leader!jay x drama-club-leader-fem!reader (ft. k from &team, sohee and seunghan from riize, eric, younghoon, sangyeon, and juyeon from the boyz, danielle from newjeans, kazuha and eunchae from le sserafim, jisung and mark from nct, ricky from zb1, enha’s jungwon, heeseung, jay, and jake, songyee from woo!ah!)
꒰ GENRES ꒱ ⪩ highschool au, performing arts au, sports au, highschool musical inspired, strangers to lovers, love at first sight, fluff, angst, crack, (kinda) self discovery, and nonidol au.
꒰ WARNINGS ꒱ ⪩ profanity, lotsss of arguing, jay has a nightmare, club/team rivalry, lying, k is like really mean, crying, kissing, y/n gets injured for a bit, mentions of possibly being sick, lmk if i missed anything!
꒰ SOUNDTRACK ꒱ ⪩ CLICK HERE!
꒰ PLAY’S DURATION ꒱ ⪩ 23717 words
꒰ AUTHOR NOTE ꒱ ⪩ first fic of the year!! honestly, this fic has existed for the last three years and went through the most craziest revamps in history... So recently I've been rewatching hsm with my older sister and forgot the plot of the old 'mansae' fic so here comes the new and improved mansae fic yall!!! — ps, thank sona for FIGHTING for this fic 😭 and ty to hana for proofreading!!
PERM TAGLIST — @soov @ox1-lovesick @urszn @hanniluvi @dakkisz @dimplewonie @xiaoderrrr @ja4hyvn @mmaplepastries @essmarye @w3bqrl @jennaissantes @yenqa @yeokii @yyunari @wvnkoi @isoobie @strwberrydinosaur @gibbysupremeacyisreal @rikizm @teddywonss @simp4jongseong @100203s @yizhoutv @yuviqik @itsactuallylina @i-yeseo @y6qiso @flwoie @shinrjj @rikibun
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ACT ONE.
“So, practice is still on tomorrow?” K asked while throwing his blazer over his shoulder. 
“Yeah, I’m down.” Eric said with a smile, wrapping his arm around Jay’s shoulder. 
“What about you? I’m sure everyone else is okay with it.” Eric asked the exhausted boy beside him, tightening his arm around Jay’s shoulder.
Jay hummed in response, a yawn breaking through midway. They arrived at K’s locker as he unlocked his own, and Jay pressed his back into the locker beside K’s. Today’s practice was enough for him. 
He was ready to fall asleep and wake up the next day, discarding all his assigned work. His eyes fell shut at the sounds of K’s locker interior clashing with his personal belongings.
“Excuse me.” someone said, gaining the attention of the three boys. Jay slightly opened one eye, glancing at the sight before him. Nakamura Kazuha, a member of the drama club, looked annoyed more than ever. 
Eric scoffed at the sight, alongside him, Jay pushed himself off the locker he was resting on and moved out of her way. She proceeded to tape up a flyer that promoted their club’s newest attraction—a play.
“Wizard of Oz? Really?” K retorted, shutting his locker at the same time. 
“What’s it to you?” Kazuha said with a raised brow.
“Nobody’s going to watch that.” 
“It’s optional. Either they watch the live action or the play.” Kazuha said, leaving K confused. 
“Aren’t those the same thing?” K asked. 
“One needs effort, and one doesn’t. For example, you look identical to an Oompa Loompa, so therefore, no costume will be needed.” She insulted him as K’s brows furrowed.
Eric snorted at the sudden insult, immediately clearing his throat once he felt K’s glare. Jay cracked a smile at her words, his gaze shifting to the poster beside him. His attention was drawn away from the conversation and onto the colourful poster before him. It was quite eye-catching.
Everyone in Decelis was aware of the rivalry between the two groups. It wasn’t anything new and stayed every school year, to the point where even newcomers heard about it. 
It all started with a misunderstanding. Back in sophomore year, the drama club had just finished designing one of their new set pieces, only for a group of rowdy boys to ruin it right after. A basketball came flying into the center of their backdrop, breaking it immediately. 
Of course, your first instinct would be to confront the basketball team. The basketball had a signature on it. One that anyone could recognize immediately; ‘DECELIS BBALL TEAM’ in bolded letters, slightly smudged from the number of sweaty hands that held the ball in many games. 
The gym doors busted open, revealing a group of furious students who caught the team’s attention. “That’s where the ball went!” Sohee exclaimed while jogging towards the group of students. 
He reached out for the basketball with a smile. 
“Thank you—”
“You guys broke our set,” Danielle said, moving the ball out of his reach. 
“What?” Sohee questioned, turning to look at his team members and then back at the students in front of him. His team members were just as confused as him. What did they mean by breaking their set?
“Is this your way of sabotaging us? We understand that your game is on the same day as our play, but that wouldn’t differentiate the number of viewers for both events.” Jungwon explained, leaving the group of boys even more confused.
K approached Sohee’s side with furrowed brows. “Why are you guys accusing us of something we didn’t do?” He asked as Eunchae sighed. 
“How are we the ones accusing you when your team’s ball is enough to prove our point?” She said, taking the ball from Danielle’s hold. 
“It came flying into our set pieces. Everyone in our school knows about the rules with your team’s ball, which is only reserved for tournament and practice services. Nothing else.” She explained. She wasn’t wrong about that. Definitely not. But still, the basketball team did nothing. 
“If you guys don’t want to answer truthfully, then that’s fine. Keep whatever reputation you have to uphold, I guess. Stay away from the drama club room, or we will inform the principal.” Juyeon said, glaring into K’s eyes. 
K felt furious. He had a history of bad anger management, and his teammates knew. He lurched at the group of students, but Sohee put an arm in front of him, halting his movements. K looked at Sohee as he shook his head. 
“Let them be.” He mumbled as the group of students walked away, dropping the ball on the ground and leaving it to dribble as it rolled toward the two boys.
The changing room doors opened, revealing a confused Jay. 
“What was all that commotion?” He asked the boys, taking in the scene before him. All the boys turned around to stare at their captain, including K, who was still mad.
He stormed off into the changing room, pushing past Jay, who blocked the entrance slightly. 
“What’s up with him?” He asked, pointing behind him with his thumb. 
“The drama club accused us of ruining their set pieces and trying to sabotage their play all because of our missing basketball. I don’t even know how it ended up in the halls in the first place.” Sohee explained while walking over to pick up the ball.
“That’s weird…” Jay mumbled, running his fingers through his hair. 
“Whatever, let’s continue with the practice.” He changed the topic as everyone went back to what they were doing.
“Jay, what are you doing?” Eric asked as Jay’s attention shifted away from the poster from earlier. 
“What? Oh, nothing…” He mumbled, trying to play it off yet failed completely. 
Jay looked around, registering that Kazuha had left to put up more posters around their school hallways a while ago and it was only the three of them together.
“Aren’t you coming?” K asked, leaving Jay unsure of what he was referring to. 
“Yeah, of course.” He said, hoping it was the right answer. 
“Sweet, let’s go!” Eric cheered as the two walked ahead with Jay trailing behind.
Jay didn’t know if he should regret agreeing or be glad that he agreed. He had no clue where they were and was even more confused once he realized they were standing in front of the doors to the drama club room. 
“What are we doing here?” Jay asked nervously. 
“You weren’t listening were you…” Eric said with a sigh. 
“We’re here to get revenge.” He explained as Jay’s eyes widened. 
“Don’t worry, it won’t be bad. Just a little warning.” He teased and reached for the doorknob. 
“I’m aware of our so-called hatred for their club but isn’t this too much? I mean, what if we get caught? We can’t be benched for our upcoming game. Plus, the season’s almost done. We can’t risk any silly behaviour.” Jay sternly said as he held onto Eric’s arm. 
“You’re worrying too much. There’s no way Coach would bench any of us, we have to be the starters no matter what.” He reassured Jay and removed his hand from his arm.
“Follow through with the plan. If we get caught, one of us goes and tries to drive the person out of the room. I’d say, Eric, you’re a good sweet talker.” K said as Eric nodded. 
“Alright…” Jay mumbled, still nervous. He didn’t want to bother the club anymore. Plus, what if this ruined his chances of ever joining one of their plays?
Auditions were in less than a week, he couldn’t blow them now.
They checked the halls before opening the door silently. The coast was clear, it was nearing the end of lunch anyway. Usually, nobody’s in the clubrooms during lunchtime. After a few weeks of observing, it was something Jay realized. He wouldn’t get caught signing up at this rate. 
They walked into the club room, closing the door behind them. “What should we take? A camera?” K asked while holding one of their cameras in his hands. He examined the other options, including their lens as well. 
“I doubt they’d care, it’s a drama club, not a photography club,” Eric said while approaching their other belongings. Jay’s grip tightened on the coat in his hands and gulped. Although he was sure they wouldn’t get caught, he was still nervous about it. 
What if it really did happen? Then what?
“A play script sounds better. I heard they’re handwritten too, then proofread to make more copies.” Eric said with a smirk. 
“The Wizard of Oz…what a silly name,” Eric said while thumbing the stapled stack of papers he held. 
“I doubt they printed any of this. It looks freshly written.” He said and looked at Jay and K.
“Yeah—” K silenced himself at the sound of footsteps. 
They quickly looked around the room, trying to find a place to hide. Eric passed K the script as he quietly walked towards the door. K pulled Jay into a nearby room that stored some of their smaller set pieces, shutting it slowly. 
“Shh,” K whispered to Jay as his harsh breathing grew quiet. There was a silence between them as they tried listening to what was happening on the other side of the door.
“Hello?” A voice called, catching their attention. Jay’s brows furrowed as he tried to pinpoint whom the voice belonged to. 
“Oh, hi.” Eric turned around, smiling at the person. 
“Y/N, I was wondering about something, so I decided to wait for one of you to return.” He lied.
“It’s their club leader,” K whispered to Jay as he nodded. Why did their name sound so familiar if that was their club leader whom he never met? 
“What is it?” You asked as Eric tried to think of an excuse. 
“I know I’m on the basketball team and whatnot, but that doesn’t mean I’m not interested in drama.” He said, trying to stall more time. 
“Here, why don’t we walk outside and talk?” Eric suggested. “I’m feeling a little cramped in here due to the amount of items your club has…” He said while looking around the room. 
“Okay…” You said as he smiled and led you two out of the clubroom. 
Once the door shut, Jay and K let out a heavy sigh. They opened the storage room door and exited. 
“It’s like 50°C in there!” K exclaimed while wiping the sweat that dribbled down his face. 
“I know,” Jay mumbled in agreement while trying to catch his breath. 
“I’m surprised he managed to convince her to leave. I told you he’s a sweet talker.” K said as the two left the clubroom in silence. 
They walked away from the doors as if they weren’t just in there as K held the script under his arm. 
“Hopefully, we can last a few days.” He said as they approached his locker. He unlocked his locker as Jay examined the empty halls. 
“Wait…” Jay mumbled while pulling out his phone immediately. 
“K, we’re late.” He said and looked at the boy in front of him. 
“Shit,” K muttered, placing the script in his locker hastily. 
“Go, I’ll catch up later. Make a believable excuse for Mrs. Jang. I’m sure she’ll believe you out of all her students.” 
Jay nodded and hurried to their English class. It’s true that he’s one of Mrs. Jang’s favourite students and was rarely ever late to class. Of course, she’d believe anything he’d say. 
ACT TWO. 
P.E. has always been one of Jay’s favourite classes. It was almost like a break from his other boring classes. He loved it and also loved being active.
The voices that cheered his name throughout the gym sounded like distant cries. His only focus was the ball that bounced in front of him and those he was opposing. He caught the ball in his hands as he searched around the gymnasium for his teammate. 
“Chenle!” Jay called out, alerting the dark-haired boy. He passed the ball to Chenle who stood only a few meters away from him and ran closer to the net.
“He’s quite good,” your classmate whispered to her friend. 
“Who? Chenle?” The friend whispered back with raised brows. 
“No, silly! I’m talking about Jay." Her chin rested in her palm as she watched Jay with narrowed eyes. 
“It’s not like it’s the first time you’re seeing him play… But I agree, no wonder the team made him their captain.” 
You looked away from the two classmates, who continued to converse with each other. The floor everyone sat on was pretty uncomfortable. If it were the bleachers, that would be way better. 
It was well-known how serious Jay became once he was on the court with an orange ball in his hands. He was way different from his normal calm aura. 
Your eyes trailed over Jay’s figure; his eyes were focused on the ball and the court, sweat droplets visible on his body as his blue hair strands stuck to his damped forehead, and he was breathing heavily. Even with how far you were seated, you could still see quite a lot. 
But not the ball that headed your way. 
“Look out!” The voices of the boys on the court yelled in unison, scattering all your old thoughts and replacing them with new ones. You prepared yourself to be hit since there was no other spot for you to move, but instead, nothing came your way aside from the tall figure that overshadowed yours. 
“Watch your surroundings, if I wasn’t able to catch that you would’ve gotten—hurt…” His harsh tone changed into a shocked one as his voice lowered in volume. His eyes were stuck on you, and he wouldn’t move, despite the number of times his teammates called his name. 
“Y/N, are you okay?” Your friend from beside you called out. 
“I’m fine,” you reassured her as she glared at the boy in front of you two. 
“We get it, you guys hate the drama club but that doesn’t mean you have to injure their club leader too.” She said as both you and Jay stayed silent.
“Jay, dude? We need the ball, focus!” Sangyeon shouted from across the gym but Jay didn’t move. 
“Thank you.” You muttered. 
“Right, no problem.” He responded awkwardly as his hand hit the basketball again.
He ran back to the court, throwing the ball into play. “My fault, whose ball is it?” He questioned while jogging into place.
“It was ours, idiot!” Sohee exclaimed while chasing after the ball. 
“Why’d you even throw it here? There’s nobody there!” He said, standing at the other end of the court. 
Jay apologized with an embarrassed smile. “Oh, sorry. That was my fault!” 
“Jeez, what’s up with him now?” Sohee mumbled as he picked up the basketball, passing it towards their other teammate, Taehyun. 
Instead of focusing on the ball and the match in front of him, his thoughts were clouded with you. So, that’s where he’s heard your name, in his P.E. class. 
The only thing is, how come he’s never noticed someone as pretty as you?
Waking up on weekdays felt natural to Jay. It meant he would go through his same old everyday routine; wake up, get dressed, eat breakfast with his family, and then go to school. 
But today was different. 
His alarm rang like usual, he got out of bed, proceeded with his morning routine, and even made himself a quick breakfast. It was something he did every day, but as said before, today was different. 
You wouldn’t leave his mind and it was bothering him. 
He ran his fingers through his blue strands as he walked down the halls of Decelis. They had an upcoming game, he couldn’t let you distract him. His schedule for today was busier than usual; he had double basketball practice, a test in English, and a test review first period. It was terrible.
He mentally prepared himself for whatever he was about to go through, hoping that’ll all be over soon. 
“Hey,” Jay’s friend greeted. 
“Hey, Younghoon.” He’d greet back as Younghoon moved beside him. 
“Woah, you look exhausted… Did you sleep at all last night?” Younghoon said, worry laced in his voice. 
“I’m fine, I just didn’t get enough as usual,” Jay explained, which wasn’t a lie.
He was bothered by the same constant dream—which was more of a nightmare, to him at least—his arms around you as you stared up at him with eyes filled with adoration. If this wasn’t him going crazy then what was?
“I’m sure you’ll be able to sleep for a bit after the test review in Chem today.” 
Jay at his words and nodded with a smile. “Hopefully.” He said, a yawn completing his sentence. He’d stretch out his arms as the two walked to Jay’s locker in a comfortable silence. 
His eyes glanced at the freshly taped-up poster that advertised the drama club’s new play. That wasn’t there previously. 
“Gross, now they’re using our belongings as canvas space?” A familiar voice said while reaching out for the taped-up paper. 
Jay looked behind the door of his locker, eyes slightly widening at the sight before him. K was ripping their poster off of Jay’s locker.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Jay began but was interrupted by another voice who finished his sentence for him. The three boys turned their attention toward the girl before them. 
“Great,” K muttered. The drama club’s leader was practically everywhere. He couldn’t get away with anything.
You’d approach K, grabbing the now crumpled-up piece of paper in his hand with an unsatisfied look. “Why are you wrecking the properties of others?” You said, earning a scoff from K. 
“Why are you ‘claiming’ the properties of others by taping up useless posters?” He retorted with a raised brow as you furrowed yours.
“Fine then.” You’d say as you moved to the nearest trash can, throwing out the balled-up poster. 
“If you don’t want us to put things on your lockers, maybe invest in some name tags. Nobody would want to waste their time and remember every irrelevant member of the basketball team’s locker number anyway.” You walked away from the three boys, leaving Jay and Younghoon stunned. Although Jay was supposed to be offended by your words, he was impressed. 
K gritted his teeth in annoyance, knowing he couldn’t do anything to you. He looked at Jay with narrowed eyes. “She’s really annoying.” He muttered in pure annoyance as Jay shut his locker. 
As much as he wanted to tell K that he was in the wrong, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. 
Instead, he looked at the time on his watch and then back at the friends beside him. “Period one starts in 5 minutes. We should get going.” He’d suggest as the two boys nodded in agreement. All Jay had to do was get through his first two periods and then he could rest during lunch practice. 
That’s all he had to do.
Yet that didn’t explain the thrilled feeling he was currently experiencing in his seat. Chemistry never had him feeling thrilled—and never will. 
“I repeat,” the student’s voice on the PA system said, catching Jay’s attention. 
“Auditions for Decelis’ drama club’s The Wizard of Oz play will begin in a week! Please, sign up on the signup sheet near the school’s entrance.” She’d continue. 
“For more information, please ask the drama club members if needed!” The mic was handed over to someone else, causing quite a commotion over the PA system. 
“You heard them, sign up now before it’s too late!” Another student said before beginning their own set of announcements. 
“Eunchae has a real warming voice.” One of Jay’s classmates complimented her. 
“I agree. I understand why she’s always on the PA system.” Another said. 
The rest of their conversation went through one of Jay’s ears and out the other. He was too distracted in trying to think of ways to sign up for their auditions secretly. He’d never done this before and never planned on doing so, but it was their last year of high school. He needed to have the so-called high school experience. 
He already had enough things to worry about. He still had time to continue this after his whole day of school. Delaying his plan-making wouldn’t hurt.
But they sure did become more difficult. Jay cautiously approached the signup sheet that was located near the school’s entrance, acting as casually as possible. He had only 10 minutes to figure out something before he had to be at the gymnasium for practice.
There was a whole crowd that surrounded the signup sheet which made his attempt to approach impossible. He sighed, trying to peek over the crowd of students who rushed to write their names down on the sheet of paper. 
“Hey, Jay!” Ricky exclaimed while swinging an arm over his team captain. 
“Hey.” He said, startled by his sudden appearance. Ricky looked ahead of him, grimacing at the sight. 
“There’s no way this many people actually like drama… It’s so boring! I hated that class last year.” He whispered. 
“Anyways, practice begins in five. How come you’re not early like always?” He’d ask, catching Jay off guard. 
5 minutes of him struggling had already gone by within a blink of an eye. “Oh, uh, I was trying but the crowd blocked off my shortcut.” Jay lied, mentally scolding himself for how bad it was. 
“No worries, I got you covered.” Ricky winked and clicked his tongue while pointing a finger gun at Jay with his free hand.
The two began to walk towards the gymnasium together as Jay felt his soul leaving his body. He definitely wasn’t going to succeed with signing up today. But he had a week to do so, eventually, he should succeed, right?
Maybe?
“Alright, gather around!” Their coach said while clapping his hands together. The 10 sweaty boys made their way towards their coach, all breathing heavily. 
“I know you’re tired, but let’s do a quick practice match.” He suggested, earning disappointed sighs from every single one of them.
“Hey, hey. It’ll be beneficial. Your game is in 2 days, don’t forget.” He said, reminding them all. They nodded and proceeded to split themselves into two teams. Both teams sent their tallest members on both sides to the center for the tip–off. 
“First team to score 10 wins.” Said their coach. He’d blow his whistle, throwing the ball up in the air as both team members rushed up to grab it, but eventually, the red team had the ball in possession. 
“It’s okay, you’ll get it next time!” Jay reassured Ricky as he jogged back out in the open. 
The ball dribbling echoed through the quiet gymnasium that only picked up on the sounds of their shoes squeaking against the polished floors and whistle-blowing. 
“Get open!” Heeseung said to his team members as they spread out across the court.
He searched for an open teammate, sending the ball straight to Mark’s hands. He’d take this opportunity to dribble the ball, trying to get free from Ricky’s defence but kept failing. His eyes shifted to K’s free figure as he attempted a bouncing ball pass to only be blocked by Ricky. 
Ricky caught the ball once Mark threw it to the ground and began to dribble it once more while sprinting to the opposing team’s key. 
“Nice one!” Their coach cheered as Ricky passed the ball to Jake immediately who took the opportunity to shoot a 2-pointer, making it in, flawlessly. 
Jake smiled in satisfaction while high-fiving his team members.
“Keep it up, Ricky. That was a good steal.” Heeseung said. 
“Woah! Isn’t this cross-teaming?” Jisung was quick to address it in a teasing manner as they all laughed and waved it off.
“Okay, 2 points for the blue team! Red team, inbound.” Their coach instructed as they all followed through. They got into their positions, Jay guarding Heeseung, Eric guarding K, Jake guarding Jisung, and Ricky guarding Mark. Sohee stood outside of the out-of-bounds line while figuring out the many outcomes if he inbounded the basketball to a certain team member. 
Eventually, the whistle blew as he threw it to Mark who managed to get free from Ricky’s guarding this time. He dribbled the ball to the other side of the court, stopping when needed. He then proceeded to turn without moving his pivot foot in an attempt to see who was free and who wasn’t. 
His plan didn’t go as well as he’d thought it would due to the difference in their heights, causing him to sigh in frustration. 
“Dude, I can’t see anything. You’re too tall.” He mumbled, making Ricky chuckle at his sudden confession. 
“I get that a lot, actually,” Ricky said back as Mark rolled his eyes and passed the ball to his nearest teammate, Heeseung, who managed to run up towards him, leaving Jay behind. 
Jay followed through and immediately began guarding Heeseung, there was no way he’d let his opponents get a point like that. 
His eyes focused on the ball in Heeseung’s hand, watching its every movement. It kept a constant routine; dribble, hit Heeseung’s hand, and dribble again. 
Jay then looked up at Heeseung, making eye contact with him. Heeseung looked away in search of his teammates as Jay followed his eyes. He’d grit his teeth in frustration, realizing that none of his team members were able to get free.
So, instead of passing the ball around, he went in. He’d dribble the ball while sprinting toward the opposing team’s net, performing a layup shot as Jay jumped up in hopes of blocking him and did so with force. 
The ball goes dashing down to the ground, alerting the others who rushed to the ball. Ricky caught the ball, running his fastest to the opposite side of the court while Sohee chased after him. The two rose to the top of the net as Ricky reached up to tip the ball into the net but was abruptly interrupted by the sudden stinging of his wrist.
The whistle blew, gaining their attention as the two landed back onto the court, the ball dribbling away from them. 
“Sohee, try to avoid fouling, okay?” Their coach said as Sohee nodded. They were all exhausted, breathing heavily as sweat droplets dribbled down their temples. 3 more points were needed.
Only three and the blue team would win. It shouldn’t be that hard, right?
Gladly, it wasn’t. The boys sighed out of exhaustion while taking their seats on the benches of their changing room. 
“Nice play, guys. I’m sure we’ll do even better when we’re on the actual court.” Jay reassured them as they all smiled.
He got up from the bench and headed towards his assigned locker. He was ready to go home, especially after his long day of school. In a hurry, he removed the towel that rested around his neck, followed by his sweat-drenched t-shirt. 
He then picked up the towel, dapping away at the sweat droplets that trickled from his jawline to his neck and around his collarbone, releasing a relaxed sigh. 
“Yo, Jay,” called Mark as Jay looked over at the said boy. 
“Hm?” He hummed, looking away afterwards. 
“Are you free after school tomorrow?” Mark asked. 
“I believe so. Why?” Jay replied while rummaging through his backpack for his necessities. 
“I was wondering if you wanted to study together, then go out and play some video games. It's been a while since we last did so.” Mark explained while putting on his shoes. 
"Sure, why not—”
“Which one of you did it?" 
ACT THREE.
The sudden commotion made all their heads turn to its location. Most of them sighed and rolled their eyes at the sight as Jay stayed quiet. What was going on? 
“Don’t you just love barging into our own private spaces?" K teased, approaching the doorway while buttoning up the last few buttons of his undershirt. 
“I wonder if you guys also rehearse these moments in your drama meetings,” he started. 
“Well, I mean, you are the club’s leader, right? I’m sure you’d know.” He said, but you remained silent and furious.
You never understand why your club members hated the basketball team in the first place. Yes, they were quite rowdy, but the same day your set pieces were broken, they lost their basketball. Which truly meant they couldn’t have been the cause of the incident, right?
Of course, that's what you believed, but the more you searched for the script for your club’s play, the more you doubted yourself. You felt enraged. There wasn’t anyone else who’d try to sabotage your club except for the basketball team. So you went to ask them for yourself. 
You were already in a bad mood and didn’t want to put up with any of K’s antics, but he wasn’t helping. You didn’t care that you were currently facing a group of boys; some were shirtless while others sat on the benches, switching shoes or calming themselves down.
“What is it now?” K asked, resting on a row of lockers. 
“Our script for our play is missing. Which one of you took it?” You’d ask again as Jay’s eyes slightly widened. 
“Why would we take your club’s script? We have better things to focus on.” K said while crossing his arms.
He was a good liar—quite amazing, actually. Jay was surprised that K was able to lie easily without hesitating when it came to you. Maybe that was Jay’s own problem…
Eric minded his own business and continued to pack things into his backpack. He knew he’d slip up if he were to join in the argument, blowing their cover away.
Jay grabbed his tank top, slipping it on before his undershirt in an attempt to distract himself and drown out the conversation nearby. He gulped nervously and slipped his arms through the designated holes of his undershirt, glancing over at the two who argued. 
“Once again, we didn’t steal anything. You guys are always accusing us of this.” K sighed, looking over at Jay, who looked away immediately. 
“Right, Jay? We didn’t take anything.” K asked, causing Jay to stiffen. 
He looked over at the two, making eye contact with you, then K. He signalled a look to Jay, hoping he understood its meaning. Jay was good at lying and could lie without hesitation, but how come he couldn’t do it with you?
“Yeah, we didn’t.” He managed to let out after hesitating many times before. Normally, after he told a lie, he didn’t feel any sort of way. He always found them as a way to save himself in certain situations, but he felt tremendously guilty telling a lie to you. 
The two of you only exchanged a few words and a few moments of eye contact with each other, yet he felt like he was committing a crime. It was weird and confusing to him, at least. 
“See, even proof from our captain. If that’s all you need, please shoo—or whatever you drama freaks say during your plays.” K said while pushing himself off the lockers and heading towards his backpack. You looked around the changing room, making eye contact with Jay once more, before leaving, still as enraged as when you first arrived. 
Once you were out of the gymnasium, Jay rushed over to K with no hesitation. 
“Dude? You know you took the script, so why did you lie?” He asked as K looked up at him. 
“What do you mean, I took the script? You were with Eric and I, so it wasn’t only my doing.” He said back, making Jay frustrated. 
He was so frustrated over nothing. 
The other boys in the changing room turned their heads to look at where the voices were coming from.
“I tried to say no, but you guys made me go either way. I knew we’d get caught, yet you both insisted on doing so.” Jay’s words caused K’s eyebrows to rise slightly. 
“Why the fuck are you so mad? You’re acting as if this is anything new. Plus, I’m not even the only one who lied, you did too.” He said, still confused as to why Jay was so mad, but began getting a little irritated at Jay’s sudden anger. 
“Because you made me! Why would you put me in a spot like that in the first place? Like you said before, it wasn’t just me who was with you. Eric was there too, and still, you only called on me?” Jay asked while pointing at Eric and then at K. 
K furrowed his brows. Jay was practically arguing with him for no reason, and it wasn’t making K feel any calmer. 
“Bro, did someone piss in your cereal this morning or something? Why are you so mad over a simple incident that happens almost all the time?" K asked, as mad as Jay. 
K stared into Jay’s eyes as he remained silent. Ricky took out an earbud, looking up at the sight of his team captain and one of their star players staring at each other in rage. He looked around the room, noticing that nobody said anything as all eyes were on the two from earlier. 
“Woah, Jay, what’s up with you today?” Ricky asked while walking over to the two arguing boys. Jay was never one to pick arguments with friends, teammates, opponents, teachers, you name it. So, seeing this was not a regular sight. 
Jay ignored Ricky, walked back to his locker to grab his belongings, and left the changing room while pushing past Ricky and K. 
“What’s up with him? It’s almost like he’s against us and stands with the drama club.” K said while calming down. 
“I doubt it,” Sohee said while tying his laces.
“It probably was pent-up stress from everything he had going on today. His schedule was pretty packed, so…” Heeseung added as the other boys nodded in agreement. 
“Probably,” K said under his breath. 
Even Jay hoped that was the reason. Ever since he laid eyes on you, he’s seen you practically everywhere; in the halls, the school’s garden, his dreams at night, during the day, and much more. At this rate, he couldn’t escape you at all. 
As he made his way to the school entrance, the signup sheet caught his attention. School was out, and there was no one but his team members and you in the school. It wouldn’t hurt to at least attempt signing up before it was too late, right?
He approached the sign-up sheet while looking around the empty halls for any bystanders. There were already names written down on the sheet, and space was almost gone. He picked up the pen, going in to write his name in a tiny font, but was then startled by a distressed scream.
The scream didn’t scare Jay. What scared Jay was the fact that he was almost caught. He backed away from the signup sheet and looked down the hallway, revealing an angry you in the process. You looked up from your shoes, making eye contact with him as you glared.
He looked away, unsure of what to do or say, and speed-walked out of the school doors. There was no way their club leader, who was already mad enough, was going to catch Jay doing the unthinkable.
You rolled your eyes and made your way back to the clubroom to clean up the mess you made in search of the script. What were you going to tell your club members? You were supposed to proofread it today. Everything was planned, but the script suddenly missing ruined it all.
You’d sigh while running your fingers through your hair in frustration. Maybe you misplaced it somewhere, and maybe the basketball team was just misunderstood. It couldn’t be that hard to find.
You pulled out your phone and opened your reminders app. “Make an announcement about the missing script,” you mumbled as you typed away at your phone’s keyboard. You turned off your phone, slipping it back into your blazer’s pocket. 
Hopefully, you can sleep this stress away.
Jay woke up in a sweat. His heart was racing as ragged breaths exited his lips. He sat up in an attempt to calm his breathing and racing heart. He’d glance at the bright light his phone emitted due to a new notification. The clock read 6:02 AM, way earlier than he normally wakes up. 
He rubbed his eyes, knowing he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep after that ‘dream’ of his. He got out of bed, slipped into his slippers, and approached the door to his bathroom. It was still quite dark outside, which felt off. 
Normally, Jay would be awake by 7:40 AM, around the time the sun would rise. He also rarely had nightmares, but last night was weird. He doesn’t know why he even considered this a nightmare. You two weren’t even close, yet seeing you fall for someone else scared him.
He felt jealous even when he had no reason to feel so. The bathroom light was brighter than usual, causing his eyes to have a harder time adjusting to the sudden brightness. He squinted while looking at himself in the mirror. 
He sure looked like a mess.
He picked up his toothbrush, followed by his toothpaste, and squeezed a bit onto the rough bristles. He’d place his toothbrush in his mouth with a sigh as he continued to stare at himself through the mirror.
What has gotten into him? Even throughout his crushes at the start of his high school years, he didn’t feel like this at all. He’s only laid eyes on you a few times and barely exchanged words with you to be able to develop a crush. So, what were all these dreams—and nightmares—all about? He spat into the sink, staring at the running faucet as his grip tightened on the edge of the sink. 
Maybe shooting some hoops would get his mind off of this, which explains why he was at school an hour earlier than usual.
He slipped off his backpack, placed it beside the net pole, and went to crack open a window to get rid of the humid feeling. He then grabbed the nearest basketball in the process. He made his way towards the free-throw line, dribbling the basketball on his way there. 
Once he arrived, he spun the ball in his hands to get a better grip and focused his attention on the net before him. He positioned his arms, getting comfortable with the ball and the distance between him and the basketball hoop. 
Suddenly, as he let the ball slip from his fingertips, his thoughts became filled with you. The sound of the basketball ricocheting off of the net’s rim brought him back to reality. For some reason, he couldn’t escape you. 
Luckily, the ball made its way back to Jay’s feet, making his job way easier. He picked up the ball, discarding the thoughts from earlier as he prepared to shoot again. This time, he dribbled the ball a few times before letting it slip from his grip. 
He watched as the ball bounced off the backboard and back into his hands. Usually, he doesn’t miss his shots like this, even if his mind is filled with many distracting things. Immediately after catching the ball, he let it loose again, missing completely. 
Again, he immediately shot the ball after picking it up, but of course, he missed. And again, and again, and again, and again… He even tried doing different types of shots; a layup, a three-pointer, another free throw, a 1-pointer, and missed every single one of them.
He paused, holding the ball in his hands. He was exhausted. Panting from all the previous shots he attempted to only end up missing every 14 throws. He took a seat, sighing in disappointment. He was frustrated, very frustrated.
He pulled out his cell phone from his pocket, checking the time in the process. Only 20 minutes had gone by since he first arrived at the school’s gym meaning he had another 40 minutes to pass. 
Well, that would be hard. He might as well try practicing again.
In all honesty, you didn’t mean to arrive at school this early. You woke up, panicking. Your alarm didn’t go off, and the clock on your wall read 8:05 AM. You were late—very late.
Or so you thought. 
Once you hopped onto the bus, wondering if it could drive any faster, you pulled out your phone, checking the time once more, only to be disappointed. 
It was 7:20 AM, not 8:20 AM. Screw you for not checking your phone when you first woke up. 
You sighed and facepalmed in an attempt to contain your frustration. As the bus pulled up to your stop, you mentally scolded yourself while walking off, after thanking the bus driver, of course. In your defence, you were too busy worrying about the missing script for your club, distracting yourself from taking care of your own mind.
The more you thought about the script incident, the more you began to feel bad for your outburst on the basketball team. Your grip tightened on the straps of your backpack as you walked down the school’s halls in silence.
You had no clue where your feet were taking you, but with every step, you finally reached the gym doors. You hesitated. What if they weren’t in there? There could be a possibility that they had a morning practice, but there was a high chance they wouldn’t want to see you even more after yesterday’s incident. 
You were ready to walk away, but your feet weren’t. You looked down at your shoes, waiting for one of them to take the first steps, because, for some reason, you couldn’t do it on your own. The sound of a basketball bouncing off the polished wooden floors echoed on your side of the door. You looked over at the blue doors in silence, debating if you should take the chance.
Suddenly, one thing happened and then another, leaving your mind confused. Your mind had no time to register what was happening, leaving your body to move on its own. 
The sound of the basketball bouncing off the gym floor came to a stop as you realized what had just happened; you opened the doors to the gym without your knowledge.
You stared at the person who stood in the middle of the court, trying to pinpoint who it was. It was dark in the gymnasium, the only light being the rising sun that slightly seeped through the blocked windows. 
ACT FOUR. 
Jay looked at the entrance, just as confused as they were. He had no clue who was standing at the entrance and couldn’t see much due to the limited access to lighting. 
“I…” You mumbled, removing your hand from the doorknob immediately. 
“I, um, I’m sorry if I interrupted something.” You said, looking away. 
“No, it’s fine…” Jay replied, clearly out of breath. 
You looked back, genuinely curious to find out who it was and why they were alone, unaware that you were approaching the court. Their voice sounded familiar to you. It was as if you heard it quite a lot throughout an average school day.
“Did you need something?” Jay asked, dribbling the ball as they got closer to him.
 “Not really,” you said as you began to walk around the court, trying your best to avoid the person before you.
He repositioned the ball in his hold, throwing it into the hoop once more. 
“You seem like you do,” Jay said, causing their brows to furrow. 
“How? You can’t even see me.” You joked, earning a small laugh from them. 
“You know what I meant,” Jay replied, holding a smile while making his way to the rolling basketball. You two became silent; the only sound that filled the gymnasium was their shoes rubbing against the floor with the bouncing basketball noises to back it up.
You fiddled with your fingers as you watched their silhouette run up to the net, letting the ball roll off their fingers as it found its way into the hoop. Although you couldn’t see much, you were still impressed. The sunlight that seeped through the blinds shined on their features, flashing the vibrant blue hair colour and their fit build. 
From this observation, you couldn’t hold back the question that slipped through your lips, “Do you play basketball?” You asked as they stopped moving.
“Yeah, I came early to shoot some hoops. I had to get my mind off of things.” Jay replied, dribbling the ball as he approached the three-point line.
He was satisfied with the shot he just took—he finally made it in. After the last 30 minutes he was there for, he finally got one of his many shots in. He smiled as he looked up from the line and turned around. 
He faced the net, positioning the ball in his hands, hoping that whatever miracle happened a moment ago would happen again.
You watched from the bleachers, taking in every detail of their movements; they bent their knees and moved their arms as well as the ball in the process, eyes were focused on the net’s backboard, arms pulled back slightly, and suddenly, the ball was in the air. 
The ball successfully went inside the hoop another time, and you began to clap in excitement. They turned around with what you hoped was a smile (and was) as you returned it. A sudden breeze from the slightly cracked opened window blew the blinds around, revealing the sunlight that was previously seeping through them as it shined on both of you.
“I’m sorry.” You blurted after realizing who you were speaking to. The leader of the basketball team—the main reason you came here. 
The ball rolled to his feet as he stared back at you with wide eyes. 
“What?” He asked, confused. 
“I’m sorry. That’s what I originally came here for—to apologize.” You explained. You looked around and then checked the time on your phone. 
“I have to go prepare for the club today, but I’m sorry for yesterday’s outburst.” You said, grabbing your stuff to leave. 
Jay stood in silence, the ball still at his feet, and you were now gone. He was unsure as to what you were apologizing for but didn’t ask many questions. Yesterday’s outburst… That was all he needed to know.
He picked up the basketball, threw it into the hoop, and of course, it didn’t go in. 
Why?
Because you still haven’t left his mind.
ACT FIVE. 
Jay stared at the locker before him. It read the number 734. 
K’s locker. 
He gulped nervously, wondering if he’d regret doing this later. 
If he got caught, would that continue to ruin the relationship between him and his teammates, or would doing this be beneficial and help him get into The Wizard of Oz? 
Maybe the first option.
He looked around the empty halls, double-checking that he was alone. He gripped the hall pass in his left hand as he reached out for the lock with his right. He had to hurry. The excuse of ‘using the bathroom’ wouldn’t work for long until others started to think he had the runs. 
Honestly, he didn’t know why he cared so much about your club. Yes, he liked drama, but he never cared for the club, mainly before he found out about their club leader—you. 
Jay turned the wheel on the lock, following the same pattern K executed when unlocking his locker; pass 0 three times, then turn the wheel to your first number, 16. Spin counter-clockwise, passing the previous number twice, and arrive at your next number, 34. Lastly, turn the wheel to your final number, 4, and yank on the lock with the hope that you made no mistakes.
The code had all even numbers, and as weird as it was, the code suited K very well. On the court, he was very persistent and strategic, his plans always included all the teammates since all the roles evened out perfectly.
Jay opened the locker, scanning the hallways once more before reaching for in what he came here for, the play script. He shut the locker, and a loud slam echoed through the empty hallways, startling Jay at the same time. 
Either he was just really nervous or the locker was truly loud.
He held the script close to his chest, letting his feet take him wherever. His plan only focused on retrieving the script, not what came after. Suddenly, he stood in front of the Drama clubroom, a wave of nostalgia washing over him. 
He crouched down, unsure of what he should do next. Should he slip the script from underneath or between the cracks of the door? Jay looked at the thickness of the script and shook his head. There was no way it’d fit in between. 
So, he went with plan A, slipping it from underneath the door. He used his index fingers to slip the script in slowly, hoping it wouldn’t disturb anyone on the other side—not that he wanted anyone there. He’d hate that.
He was so focused on being quiet that he didn’t take note of the footsteps behind him. 
“Park Jongseong.” The voice was deep and very familiar. A hall monitor—Seungcheol. He was the only person who called Jay by his government name, the one on his student files. Jay froze in panic and slowly turned around.
“Hey…” He greeted, cautiously. Luckily for him, Seungcheol stood quite far from his spot on the ground. Jay rose, hiding the script behind him. 
“What are you doing out of class?” He asked, searching his hidden hands for a hall pass. 
“I was excused,” Jay began but paused. 
“For?” Seungcheol asked, but Jay remained silent. His mouth opened and closed, like a fish out of water, as he thought of his next words. He couldn’t lie and say he was excused to use the bathroom, right? How would that explain why he was currently standing in front of the Drama clubroom anyway?
He stared at Seungcheol as Seungcheol stared back. “Jongseong, what are you doing out of class?” He asked once again, but Jay still didn’t have an answer. How could he lie in a situation like this? 
Yes, he was good at lying, but not under pressure.
In silence, Jay’s eyes shifted over to a spot behind Seungcheol. 
“What is that?” He asked with genuinely concerned eyes. Seungcheol turned around, worried, while Jay took it as a sign to proceed with his plan. 
He let go of the script, letting it fall to the floor and kicked it with his heel, causing it to slide under the door completely from the impact. Perfect. 
“What are we looking at?” Seungcheol asked, turning around to face Jay who smiled at him. 
“Ah, I must’ve been mistaken.” He apologized, rubbing at the back of his neck sheepishly. 
“I’m sorry.” He added, completing the apology. “I should head back to class now, shouldn’t I?” Jay said to a confused Seungcheol.
“See you later.” Jay waved goodbye, walking past the hall monitor and in the opposite direction his class was located. 
Seungcheol was suspicious of him, but there wasn’t much he could do. He was aware of Jay’s reputation as the boys’ basketball team leader. But he was also aware of the rivalry between the team and the Drama club. 
Maybe he shouldn’t question much of it, right? 
Seungcheol sighed and rubbed at his temples in an attempt to soothe away these useless thoughts, which, spoiler alert, did work. 
Jay quickly turned into a random corridor in the hallway he walked in, exhaling a heavy breath. One he held in and wasn’t aware of. His hand rested on the wall beside him as his eyes closed. Why was he nervous? He never was when lying. 
It was scary knowing how much of an effect you had on him. 
“Excuse me.” A voice called. He opened one of his eyes, glancing at the figure before him, and flinched once he recognized them. He straightened up immediately and cleared his throat. He stared into their eyes as they stared back into his eyes in silence. 
“You’re in my way…” You said, hoping that would help his clueless self. 
“Oh, right.” He blurted and moved out of your way. Before leaving, you gave him an awkward smile, still not over this morning’s incident. 
Both of you weren’t. It wasn’t something to worry about too, but for some reason, you both did. It was weird. 
Jay’s thoughts were clouded with the conversations from this morning. If only he had known you were the one talking to him, just maybe he would’ve purposely tried harder on his shots. And if you were lucky enough, you could’ve seen his trick shots. But instead, he held back. It was only a warmup, after all. 
“Jay,” you called, making his stomach twist and turn. Why did your voice saying his name have such an effect on him? He had no clue either. 
“Jay.” You called again, turning around to stare at him.
Either he was dreaming or going crazy, there was no way you’d say his name a second time while staring into his eyes. What was going to happen next? Perhaps something more?
“Could you let go?” You asked, shaking your hand to avert his attention from the movement. 
“Oh,” Jay whispered. 
Oh. 
Jay let go of your hand, looking away while doing so. He was embarrassed. Very embarrassed. He glanced at you for a split moment, catching the same awkward smile you sent him before. 
Great, he embarrassed himself badly. 
You walked away, continuing your route from before, leaving Jay behind. Once you were out of his sight, he gripped at his scalp, pulling at his blue strands. Why did he do that? He had no clue. He wasn’t even aware of his sudden action.
Was it because of his so-called nightmare from last night? None of this made sense. 
Especially the way Jay’s heart raced while butterflies danced in his stomach.
What the hell was happening to him?
“Is he okay?” Sohee asked from the other side of the court. 
“I have no clue,” Mark replied, staring at their team captain alongside Sohee.
“Our game is tomorrow, how the hell is he going to play in this condition?” K exclaimed to the two boys. 
“Hey, Jay!” K shouted, heading the boy's way. Mark and Sohee’s eyes widened at the sight, already imagining what would go down.
The two argued only a day ago and never made up—or at least that’s what their teammates thought—this would only escalate to something worse than the locker room incident. 
Mark and Sohee ran after K in hopes of stopping him, but instead, K pushed them off of him. They failed miserably. 
Jay looked up at K in silence. His fingers pinched at the palm of his right hand out of habit. His mind was elsewhere, not focused on the practice he attended. 
He missed all his practice shots and game shots, constantly fouled, and played terribly overall. It was hard to watch. 
“What’s wrong with you today—fuck that, what’s wrong with you lately?” K asked, staring down at Jay. 
“What are you on about?” Jay asked cluelessly. 
He knew exactly what K was referring to. But he couldn’t answer because he had no clue himself. His mind was so full of you that he couldn’t even comprehend what their coach was explaining today. 
“What am I on about? Dude, you’re missing all your shots, fouling us like crazy, and even tripping over the ball! This is basketball, not soccer!” K explained, his anger slowly getting to him. He was frustrated. 
Very frustrated. 
“I don’t know either,” Jay said. He wasn’t lying, it was the full truth. 
“Well, figure it out and straighten up. Our game is tomorrow, we can’t lose the second last game of the season.” K warned in a stern tone. It was almost as if he was the team leader instead of Jay.
“I’ll try,” Jay mumbled, turning away to the locker room. “You’ll try?” K asked, even more frustrated at his response. 
“How are you going to try on the court if you can’t even try at practice?!” K exclaimed. 
“I don’t know. I’ll figure it out,” Jay said with a sigh. He was tired, so tired. He went through enough today, and dealing with K’s frustration wasn’t on his to-do list.
He walked away, making his way to the locker room. K’s footsteps approached him from behind. They were harsh and loud. Every single one almost sounded like a full stop in a sentence. 
“Hey!” K shouted, forcefully turning Jay around by his shoulder. They stared into each other’s eyes, K searching Jay’s for whatever he yearned for while Jay just stared. 
He wasn’t looking for anything, all of K’s emotions were prominent on their own; anger, frustration, and a hint of sadness. 
“You’ve been acting weird lately. First, you get all defensive about the script stealing, then you get all mad that we lied to Y/N about stealing the script.” K paused. 
“Are you betraying us right now?” He asked, causing Jay’s brows to furrow. At this point, all eyes were on them. Their coach went to grab some cleaning supplies for the basketballs from his office but hasn’t returned since. He always misses arguments.
“Betraying you?” Jay was confused. “What does any of that have to do with me ‘betraying’ you guys?” Jay asked the boy in front of him. 
“Why do you care for the Drama club so much? You’re aware of our hatred for them, aren’t you?” K’s words hit like an arrow. 
“Jay, be honest, have you ever hated them?” K asked, causing Jay to stiffen. It was obvious he stiffened, even K noticed it. K scoffed at the sight, looking away for a moment. 
“You can’t be serious. Those stuck-up brats blamed us for something we didn’t even do, yet you’re fine with them?” K said, and Jay opened his mouth to reply but was silenced by K’s voice.
"Kazuha, that annoying little girl and Y/N’s snotty little attitude—”
“Her attitude isn’t snotty.” Jay sternly interrupted K’s sentence. 
“Why should you care if it is or not? She and her minions know how to do nothing but accuse and insult.” K insulted, rolling his eyes at the memories. 
“They’re terrible people, especially Jungwon and Y/N—”
Jay’s hand bunched up K’s collar, silencing him immediately. K was shocked by Jay’s sudden movements but regained his composure soon after. 
The two stared into each other’s eyes again, Jay’s showcasing his anger as K’s did the same. Eric rushed over before things could escalate, forcing Jay’s hand off of K’s collar. 
“You need to chill out. Honestly, I don’t know what has gotten into you or what you’re going through right now, but please, talk it out with someone. Or even better, talk it out with us.” Eric suggested, but Jay ignored him and walked off into the locker room as K fixed his top. 
K’s eyes narrowed while his brows furrowed. He hated the look in Jay’s eyes just now. It was something he had never seen before.
Truly, what the hell was wrong with him? Jay still couldn’t answer.
ACT SIX.
The sound of the tap water running echoed throughout Jay’s washroom. He stood there in silence, watching how it pooled up in the sink and then disappeared as his grip tightened on the ledge.
“Mom says if you’re going to use the water, use it. It’s been running for the last 20 minutes. It can’t possibly take you that long to wash up.” A knock and a voice emitted from the doorway, causing Jay to look over, revealing the sight of his younger sister, Songyee. 
“Okay,” Jay said, turning off the tap water as Songyee left. He grabbed a towel nearby to dry his drenched face, water droplets dripping down from his chin and onto the marble counters. 
The footsteps on the staircase caught his attention as he looked over at the door once more. “Songyee!” He exclaimed, calling her back to the washroom. She sighed and made her way over, resting on the doorframe once she arrived.
“What?” She asked, waiting for Jay to speak. 
“Would you do something your friends wouldn’t be happy with?” He asked, hoping she would give a proper answer, but instead, her brows furrowed. She relaxed after a few moments of silence and crossed her arms.
“Depends,” she said, her words slipping out as a sigh. Jay looked at her, confused, waiting for her to elaborate. 
Depends? That was not what he wanted to hear.
“I would, of course, tell them. They should be mad after you tell them, instead of them being mad after finding out you kept it a secret.” She emphasized, causing Jay to pause his movements. 
He brought the towel away from his face and stared at himself in the mirror. His sister’s words replayed in his head, with a bigger emphasis on the word secret. He was good at keeping secrets. Maybe that was a problem.
“Songyee,” he started as she hummed in response. 
“What if I quit the team?” He asked, his words startling her. 
“Are you crazy?! Jongseong, this is literally an opportunity for your scholarship. It’s an easier way out than Mom and Dad paying for your tuition fee.” She shouted while Jay hung up the towel again, slightly tensing at the use of his government name.
“There’s two more games and the season’s done. All you have to do is win them both. Why are you thinking about this? What has gotten into you?” She asked, genuinely concerned. 
“I don’t know. Okay? I don’t know!” He said in a harsh tone. Songyee was taken aback by his sudden harsh tone. What did she say to trigger something within him? 
“Everyone keeps asking me the same question. How am I supposed to answer if I don’t know myself?” He asked with the same harsh tone, looking straight at her.
His eyes stared into her wide ones as he came back to his senses. He cursed under his breath, looking away. 
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t mean to take it out on you.” He added, running his fingers through his blue strands.
“It’s okay,” Songyee whispered. “Sleep well, okay? Whatever you’re stressing over, don’t think about it too much. Take my advice when you can.” She said, followed by a quiet goodnight, and left the doorway. 
Jay was tired. He was tired of how he reacted to K’s words, your presence, and his sister’s question. He had a game tomorrow, that’s truly all he had to focus on. 
The second last game of the season. All he had to do was quickly sign up for the play and rush over to the gymnasium to prepare for his game. 
Easy, right?
He turned off the bathroom light and headed to his room. He could finalize his plan in the morning because he was too tired to think logically right now. He turned off the lights in his bedroom and made his way to his bed. 
His eyes fell shut as he drifted off to dreamland. Hopefully, he can have a good rest. 
His alarm woke him up, the bright light read 6:45 AM. He rubbed his eyes while turning it off. You could say he had a somewhat good sleep. 
The whole time, while Jay got ready, he recited his plan; arrive at school on time, during lunch he’ll sign up for the play and take note of the audition day, then head to his basketball match after school. Those were only the main points of his day, even if attending class was always included in his plans, it was never mentioned.
He got off the bus after thanking the driver and walked towards the entrance of Decelis. 
If he was being honest, there was a slight awkward tension between him and Songyee during breakfast, but he didn’t pay much attention to it as she did the same, focusing on eating their meal.
He adjusted the straps of his backpack, blending in with the many other students who walked into the school. His eyes glanced at the pillar the audition sheet hung on, smiling. His plan would definitely work.
He’d look back in front of him, pausing abruptly. “Oh, sorry,” he apologized at the sudden collision. 
“It’s okay,” you replied, causing Jay’s eyes to widen. 
“Also, I apologize to your team once again. We found the play script, I guess someone returned it.” You said, smiling at the memory. 
“Other than that, good luck on your game today.” Your smile grew as you waved at him and walked away.
To be honest, his heart was racing. He had no clue why. You were just doing the bare minimum, yet he was going crazy. He shook his head, inhaling and exhaling to calm his racing heart. 
In the process, he looked down the crowded halls, making eye contact with a familiar boy, K. Usually, they’d be alongside him while walking down the hallways, but their group chat was quiet all evening and morning. They couldn’t plan their daily meetup in this condition. 
K rested his back on his locker with his backpack swung over one shoulder—his signature look. Eric’s lips moved while staring at K. He was most likely rambling about an incident in the video game he played the night before. It was something he did often. The morning wouldn’t feel complete if he didn’t. 
K rolled his eyes, scoffing, once Jay looked over at the two. 
“Let’s go,” K said as Eric nodded, confused, but didn’t think much about it. He continued rambling about the video game as they made their way to class. 
Jay sighed, regretting yesterday’s argument. It was obvious K was still mad at him for it. Was Jay really betraying his teammates over a play? He had no clue. 
He shrugged it off, making his way to his first-period class that he shared with the two boys. English. Good luck to him, for sure.
Throughout all of his morning classes, Jay anxiously bounced his leg. He was impatient, wanting lunch to arrive faster. 
English was quite awkward, mainly due to the seating plans; K sat behind Jay, who sat in the middle, and Eric sat in front of him. It was something they begged their teacher to do so they could talk whenever, but today wasn’t the case.
Eric even got up from his seat, sitting beside K, to chat with him and him alone. There were even moments when K would call Eric’s name from behind Jay, causing them to talk with Jay sitting in the middle. 
It was very awkward, but he managed to deal with it for a whole hour and 15 minutes. 
He waited until the end of lunch so the hallways could clear up a bit more before cautiously making his way to the signup sheet. He threw on his hood from the hoodie under his blazer, tying the strings to shield his blue hair. 
Nobody could notice him at this rate.
He slowly reached out for the pen that hung on a thread, ready to write his name as small as possible in the corner. 
“Jay?” Someone called from behind him as he stiffened. Their voice sounded too familiar.
Fuck. This wasn’t supposed to happen. How did they even recognize him with his hood like this? 
“Oh, it is you.” Their voice said, their head peeking around his shoulder. Jay looked away, quickly dropping his hand to his side. 
“What are you doing here?” They asked, but Jay stayed silent. What the hell was he supposed to say?
“I was just wondering who signed up…” He whispered, still loud enough for them to hear. 
“Why? Doesn’t your team hate us?” They asked.
Us?
“Don’t tell me they sent you here to scribble all over the names or something.” Their tone was quite harsh as Jay shook his head. He turned his head to look at the person beside him, regretting his choice immediately. 
It was you. No wonder your voice sounded familiar to him.
“Then what are you doing here?” You asked. 
“I said I was just wondering who signed up.” 
You hummed in response, reaching out your arms to the list of names. Jay backed up slightly, giving you more space.
“Wait, how did you even know it was me?” He asked, words coming out of his mouth without him knowing. 
“Your blazer has your initials on it on the back... The whole basketball team has that feature, did you forget?” You said while skimming through the list of names.
Right, he did. He removed his hood, embarrassed. 
The disguise was useless. She still could’ve thought he was Jisung, but that wouldn’t have worked. They purposely made Jay’s blazer read ‘PJY’ so they could tell each other apart.
Jay sighed, ruffling his messy hair with his hand. The bell went, catching both of your attention. 
“Oh. I gotta go.” You said, waving goodbye at him as he did the same. He walked away from the pillar, heading to his next class. 
His plan failed, but there was still another chance after school. Yes, it’ll mess up the plan he made this morning, but it should work. 
Hopefully.
It was 2:45 PM. Jay was finally excused from class for his game in the gymnasium, but that’s not where he headed. He rushed over to the pillar upfront, hoping that the signup sheet was still there. It should be.
He watched you place it back before leaving, right? Or was that a hallucination? He couldn’t remember. 
Once he arrived, his questions were answered. It was definitely a hallucination because the list of names wasn’t there. 
Shit, what should he do? Either he headed to the gymnasium for his warmup and was on time, or he rushed over to the auditorium with the hope he could still participate.
Of course, he went with the second option. The school’s gymnasium was the last place he wanted to be. He rushed over to the auditorium, his duffel bag moving with his rushed footsteps. He pushed open the doors, walking through the hallway. 
It was quiet. Too quiet. How late was he? 
He caught his breath, scanning the auditorium for any signs.
“What are you doing here?” Jay turned around at the sound of a voice. Nakamura Kazuha, but this time she was disgusted. 
“Are you here to sabotage our auditions now? Too bad, you’re too late.” She said, her words hitting Jay like a bullet.
Does he know how that feels? Nope, but it was a good word to use. 
“Leave him alone, Zuha.” Another voice spoke, causing the two to face the entrance as you walked in. 
“What are you doing here?” You asked Jay in a much nicer tone, a smile making its way to your face.
His face felt warm as the butterflies in his stomach moved to the beat of his heart—fast. 
“Are you here to audition?” You asked as Kazuha’s eyes widened. 
“Don’t you dare say yes, you fool—"
“Zuha.” You sternly called her name, silencing her.
“Well,” Jay started. This was his only chance, he couldn’t miss out on it. If he chickened out on admitting his true feelings once again, he knew he would regret it the moment he went home.
You never know what could happen after he admitted his true emotions. The words that were normally caught in his throat making it almost impossible to breathe finally escaped his lips.
"Yeah," Jay said, straightening up. 
The heavy weight on his shoulders was lifted as Kazuha’s eyes widened, and yours did too, but you regained your composure quickly. 
“I mean, there’s nothing wrong with that. But auditions are over.” You explained, searching Jay’s eyes for any change in emotion.
Was he being genuine, or was this a dare from his teammates? 
“Oh,” Jay mumbled. 
Great. His plan was ruined, and he was going to be late for his game. 
Was God ever on his side at this point? 
He gave the two girls a slight smile, saying his goodbyes. 
"Good luck on your game,” you whispered, and he nodded. He left the auditorium, checking his watch while doing so.
It was 2:55 PM. Their game started at 3:00 PM. His teammates would definitely be mad at him. He rushed over to the gymnasium, out of breath once again. He was lucky the auditorium and gymnasium were near each other, leaving him with 3 minutes to change. 
He didn’t even get to warm up. 
He rushed into the locker room, being met with his angered teammates, especially K. 
“Where were you? Weren’t you excused at 2:45 PM? Why didn’t you come here like everyone else?” K asked, following Jay to his locker. 
“I’m sorry,” Jay apologized, placing his duffel bag on the bench in front of his locker. He removed his shirt, throwing it into his locker while rummaging around in his bag for his uniform. 
“The fuck is an apology going to do? There’s 2 minutes left until our game starts. Hell, it would’ve been worse if everyone had to wait even longer for you.” K said as Jay slipped on his jersey.  
Luckily for him, he wore his shorts underneath his uniform pants, slipping them off in haste. 
“Well, I’m here now, aren’t I? Stop complaining,” Jay replied, annoyed at K’s words. 
“You’re a terrible leader.” K spat, walking out of the locker room and pushing past the teammates who blocked the doorway, leaving the awkward and intense atmosphere behind.
He made his way to the team’s bench, taking his seat immediately. 
“Is Jay here?” Their coach asked K. 
“That asshole excuse of a leader? Yeah, he is.” K insulted, eyes still on the court. 
“Watch your mouth.” Their coach warned as K rolled his eyes. 
Right now, he didn’t care how harsh his words might’ve been. It felt like Jay was neglecting the team even while being their leader. He should be someone the team could rely on, and he was. But recently, he wasn’t. The team was all over the place, it was obvious they weren’t ready for today’s game. 
The rest of the team members made their way out of the locker room, joining K on the bench. 
“Starters for today’s match are K, Jay, Heeseung, Mark, and Eric.” Their coach explained, flipping through the sheets in his hand. 
“You all know your positions, right?” 
The group of boys nodded, some stretching in the process.
“Okay, go out there. Play hard.” He said with a smile. 
The five boys made their way onto the court, taking their places, with K in the center like always. 
“Focus,” K said to everyone, turning his head to Jay, who stood beside him.
“Especially you.” He said, glaring at him. 
That was Jay’s line. He usually told the team to focus, then turned his head at one of their teammates, saying those exact words in a teasing manner. But the only difference with K’s words was that he wasn’t teasing Jay. 
He was being serious.
As much as Jay wanted to respond to his words, he kept quiet, looking away from K. 
“One member from each time, please step forward for tip-off.” One of the referees said, holding a ball with his unstretched arm in the middle of the court. K made his way to the center, meeting the opposing team member who was sent for tip-off as well. 
They both glared at each other, getting into their defensive positions. The referee stretched his arm up, catching K and the opponent’s attention as they both looked up. He blew his whistle, throwing up the ball as the two boys jumped up towards it. 
K tipped it over towards his teammates as Mark went after the ball. He dribbled, scoping the scenery while his guard made his way over. He’d pass the ball over to Heeseung, who ran across the court to the opposing team’s net. 
Heeseung paused after catching the ball, shooting it into the net, and of course, he made it in, erupting cheers from the crowd. 
2 down, and many more to go. 
ACT SEVEN. 
It’s honestly been a while since the match started. Decelis was doing great at the beginning until Jay touched the ball.
As much as it hurt to admit, he was ruining the momentum of the team. He fumbled with his dribbles, making it easier to steal the ball from him, missed his shots terribly, and even threw the ball at the referee.
He was embarrassing himself so badly.
The whistle blew, catching the players' attention. Jay was out of breath, using the bottom of his jersey to dab at the sweat line on his forehead. 
“Time,” their coach said, calling the boys over. 
“Dude, can you focus?” K said, walking beside Jay. 
“I’m focusing,” Jay replied, lying straight through his teeth.
He’s been seeing you too much lately. You two were on proper terms to at least talk with each other, but that was worse for Jay. 
Whatever he was feeling only got worse.
“You and I both know you’re not,” K said as they reached the team bench. Jay picked up a clean, folded towel, using it to dab at the rest of his sweat.
“What’s up with you and the Drama club leader?” K asked, wanting an answer. 
“Nothing is going on between us,” Jay said, hesitating for a few moments. 
“Yeah right,” K scoffed, looking away. 
“Stop arguing.” Their coach said as the two stopped talking. 
“Jay, I don't think you’re in a good condition to play.” He said, gaining Jay’s attention.
Those on the bench and those around him knew what was coming next, yet they were still shocked. They couldn’t believe their team leader and one of their star players were about to go through this.
“I’m sitting you out for the rest of the match.” He said, causing Jay’s eyes to widen. 
“What?” He asked, confused. Genuinely confused. 
“You’re messing up the team’s chemistry. We can’t have that happening right now.” Their coach explained and turned to call over the referee. 
He explained to the referee that he was subbing out #1, Jay, for #19, Jisung. Switching out one PJ for another PJ.
What a classic move.
If the school’s newspaper club saw this, he only wondered what their headline would be; Decelis boys basketball team leader Park Jay, who’s also known as one of their star players, was benched during the second last game of the season? 
He’d take that to his grave. 
Jay took his seat on the bench in shame. This may be for the better. Who knows? Hell, he did.
Watching the team play without him was something he hated. And as much as he didn’t want to admit it, they were doing way better with Jisung.
There was no awkward tension between the members, they all got along while smiling if someone stole some points and comforting each other if one of them made a mistake.
Just by the looks of it, this was definitely for the better. Maybe he was right. Maybe the team is better without him. 
They don’t need a silly little captain like him to lead them around to do well, it was obvious they were good on their own.
What if his thought from last night was more than a thought? What if it was the truth? Should he really quit the team for the better? They probably all hated him at this point, especially K. 
Someone who used to always be by his side hated the thought of having to stand in the same room as him—Jay’s words, not K’s. 
His eyes became a light shade of red, he wanted to cry. Could he cry? Of course not, that was too embarrassing, especially with how many people were near him at the moment.
However, he did it. Warm tears fell onto his hand, which rested on his knee. He was good at holding them in for the whole week, so why did he fail to do so just now? 
How come something so stupid like this happened to be what triggered his tears? Why didn’t any of the arguments with K do anything either? 
It was so obvious that he had no clue. He had too many questions to find answers to, yet he couldn’t.
He couldn’t do anything recently, it was terrible. He couldn’t play basketball properly, he couldn’t sign up for the play, he couldn’t express his feelings, he couldn’t hang out with those he loved most, and he couldn’t understand why he cared so much for you.
He couldn’t understand why you were always on his mind 24/7. He couldn’t understand why his heart raced while the butterflies in his stomach swayed at the sound of your name. 
Nothing made sense to him, and he hated that. He raised his hand, wiping at the tears before they became too much for him. 
Jay sat at the edge of the team bench, far away from his teammates. Did he even have the right to call them teammates in the first place? Did they see him as a teammate? 
He felt as though he didn’t deserve to be in the same room as them at all. He was a terrible person. Someone who was afraid to admit a stupid secret to his friends because he was afraid they’d turn their backs on him.
If he told them at the start that he didn’t hate the Drama Club and actually found them cool, then he wouldn’t have been here. It was his fault for worrying about what people would think of him. 
It was his biggest flaw. 
He wiped at his tears, now using the towel from earlier, hoping it was enough, and luckily, it was. The thing is, was he really crying over the incident with the team, or was he crying over you? 
He still had no clue.
ACT EIGHT. 
After yesterday’s game, Jay went straight into the locker room to grab his stuff and leave. He didn’t stay for the celebration portion nor did he congratulate the team. 
He just left.
Even during P.E. class, Jay didn’t talk to Sohee. He felt like he had no right to, even if Sohee didn’t hate him. He still felt guilty. They almost lost the first quarter because of him. 
Once he arrived in P.E. class, their teacher announced that they would be going on a hike for marks—something about getting a chance to boost your grade if you were failing. 
He had a 97 in this class, what was the point of him participating? He shrugged it off, deciding it would be a good way to ease his mind for a bit. 
A great distraction.
As he climbed the hill, he thought to himself. Did he really change like everyone said he did? Was he a terrible leader? Did he still have his normal calm aura? Was he still serious when he was on the court? Did he possibly fall in love with you? Were you the cause of his problems?
He exhaled and continued his walk up the hill, wondering if he’d ever find an answer. 
“Jay!” 
He turned around to the sound of his name, revealing the crowd before him. All his classmates, including Sohee, stood in a circle as their teacher faced Jay’s way. 
He motioned for Jay to come over, and he did. His eyes widened at the scene, worry washing over him almost immediately.
“You’re passing the class the most. So, don’t worry about this mark. But, can you take her to a nearby bench?” His teacher asked, signalling at your injured figure. 
Jay looked down at you as you looked up, making eye contact with him. Your hands gripped onto your ankle, questioning why it hurt so much. 
“Okay.” That was all Jay said before walking through the crowd and crouching down in front of you. 
He wondered if he truly had the highest grade in his class. So many other students could’ve done his job, but his teacher picked him.
He was thankful that he did. It gives him more of an excuse to be close to you.
In silence, you got on his back, wrapping your arms loosely around his neck. He stood up, pushing you up to adjust your position on his back.
“Alright, thank you, Jay.” His teacher said as Jay smiled. 
“Everyone else, let’s continue.” Their teacher led the other students to the route. 
Jay watched them all walk past, making eye contact with Sohee, Jay’s smile faltering. Sohee looked like he wanted to say something, but he remained silent. Sohee looked away, jogging after the group of students, as Jay sighed.
He pushed the scene back in his mind, proceeding with his more important task, bringing you to a nearby bench. 
He followed his class, hoping one was ahead because he didn’t want to go downhill. 
“You can grip tighter, you know?” He said, hinting at your loose arms. 
“I don’t want to choke you or anything.” You replied, refusing to do so. 
“You won’t though, don’t worry.” He said while stepping over a tree branch. Is this how you injured yourself?
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
You followed through with his request, tightening your arms a bit more around his neck. You were quite embarrassed to be in a position like this one, hiding your face in his neck.
For some reason, you suddenly forgot about the aching pain in your ankle. All you cared about was the warmth of Jay’s back, how he delicately held onto your legs and the strong but easing scent of his detergent and cologne.
Due to how close you two are currently, you prayed that he couldn’t hear your racing heart. It raced just like that time you saw him in the gymnasium. 
You weren’t sure what caught your attention—his blue hair or the way his eyes glistened in the distance due to the sunrise. 
Or was the first time you felt this way when you met him on the first day of school in sophomore year? You doubt he would remember your first interaction with each other—just a quick collision that caused you to drop your belongings. 
He was with his teammates, K and Eric who sent you glares, but was still nice enough to help you pick up the fallen items. It was the bare minimum, so how come you felt that way?
“We’re here,” Jay said, bringing you out of your thoughts. He turned around, crouching down in front of the bench. You took it as a sign to slip off his back, taking a seat on the wooden park bench behind you.
“What happened?” Jay asked, wondering how you injured yourself. You looked down at him, grip tightening on the edge of the bench. After a questionable amount of silence went by, he looked up at you, questioning your silence. 
“Oh,” you said.
“I rolled my ankle on a root in the ground. I couldn’t walk afterwards because it hurt so bad, but I didn’t know why.” You explained, hoping it was enough. 
He tapped on your shoe, silently asking for consent as you nodded. He looked back down at your shoe, removing it gently.
“Either you sprained your ankle or you just needed a break.” He said as he put your shoe to the side. He took your covered foot into his hold, slowly moving it around. 
“Does this hurt?”
“No.”
“That’s good.” He said, chuckling softly with a smile. Once again, butterflies spawned in your stomach, your face became warm, and your heart began to race.
You could listen to him laugh and watch him smile for days. 
“Jay,” you called as he hummed in response. You hesitated to ask your question. He looked up, questioning your silence. 
“What’s wrong?” He asked with worried eyes. 
“Do you really want to audition? It wasn’t a dare from your teammates, right?” You asked, staring straight into his eyes, searching them for any emotions they might’ve held. Jay’s movements paused on your foot as he stared back at you in silence.
“I do,” Jay began. 
“I really do, seriously.” He said, looking back down at your foot. 
“I just, can’t bring myself to do so…you know, my team hates you guys and your club hates us. It’ll feel like I’m betraying my team and our bond is already as broken as it is…” He explained, still softly toying with your foot.
You were distracted by his words, unprepared for the sudden shock of pain, causing you to wince quite loudly. Jay abruptly stopped his movements, looking straight at you with worried eyes. 
“Did that hurt? I’m sorry.” He said worriedly, removing his hands from your foot and you raised your hand, waving it off immediately. 
“It wasn’t your fault. I was just unprepared, sorry.” You apologized in an attempt to calm him down. 
“But, what do you mean your bond is already broken as it is?” You quoted him, hoping it wasn’t invading his privacy.
“Oh,” he whispered, placing his hands back on your foot. He didn’t know how he should explain it, a lot happened anyway. 
“Well, K and I have been arguing a lot recently… I also feel really guilty about making them almost lose the first quarter of yesterday’s game.” He explained, looking at the dirt on the ground. 
“I even thought about leaving the team at some point. Everything is too much for me to handle right now. My mind isn’t in its right state, you know?” He said with a soft chuckle and smile.
You were very much aware of how serious this conversation was, truly. But, god you couldn’t stop looking at the way his dimple appeared once he smiled, the way his soft and gentle hands held your foot as if it was a piece of glass that would break at any sudden movements, the way he softly chuckled, and the sincerity behind all his words.
You knew exactly what he was talking about, you’ve been there before too. Losing a play’s script was something that you feared most. It would prove how irresponsible you were as the club leader—a title you thought you didn’t deserve in that moment. 
You were thrilled after finding it once again but still worried for a moment like that to repeat. You had to be prepared, you couldn’t let your guard down. 
“Me too.” You said, biting your bottom lip in hesitation. Should you be admitting to one of your most embarrassing flaws right now? Not to mention it was to someone you only spoke with recently. 
It was weird.
You felt oddly close to Jay. Even if you had a few—many accidental encounters with each other, they only proceeded to build a bond you didn’t know you two had. You hoped he felt the same. 
“I’ve second-guessed myself being the club leader many times. Whenever I was stressed about something and couldn’t get the club’s tasks done on time, couldn’t keep the smiles on my club members bright, and when I lost the play’s script.” You explained, causing Jay to stiffen.
It was almost like hearing the words ‘play’s script’ could flip off a switch in his body, making him malfunction. He knew he wasn’t fully in the wrong for that situation but still felt guilty. 
“It was something I feared most. I hate making mistakes and losing the only copy of the play’s script made me realize how unorganized I can be. It was my fault, really, I should’ve kept it somewhere I would remember.” You elaborated. 
He nodded, tight-lipped and stiffer than ever. Of course, eventually, he would have to come clean. He didn’t know how you would react to the news though, not wanting to ruin whatever bond you two had built so far. Maybe it was better this way. He was good at keeping secrets anyway, right?
“I think you should be good for a bit. Try and see if you can walk on it now.” He said while slowly slipping on your shoe. 
“If it still hurts, don’t worry, I can carry you down the whole way.” He reassured you as you nodded.
Hey, if this was his only chance to be this close to you, of course, he was going to take it and use it to his extent.
Surely, you might’ve been on the same page as him, staggering over your feet after rising from your seat on the bench. Your ankle was perfectly fine, but your heart wasn’t. You didn’t want this moment to end. It was obvious you wouldn’t get another chance like this one, so, why not put up a lie to keep it going?
“I don’t think I can…” You winced, putting your acting skills to use. You weren’t the Drama Club leader for nothing. You ‘attempted’ another step, stumbling over your feet once again. Jay was quick to grab you by your arm before you had the chance to ‘fall’. 
“That’s okay,” he said, secretly cheering internally. He guided you back to the bench, letting you take a seat before crouching in front of you, silently signalling for you to hop on. You bit back your smile, also cheering internally. 
You were very glad that your acting worked.
You got onto his back, wrapping your arms around him the same as before. The warmth of his back engulfed your slightly cold figure as the comforting tang of detergent and his cologne filled your nostrils. You smiled, placing your chin on Jay’s shoulder. You wanted this moment to last forever and he did too.
“Hey,” you said, gaining his attention. He hummed in response, too focused on climbing the hill to catch up to the rest of your classmates. 
“You said you wanted to audition, right? I don’t think you’ll be able to get a major role since it’s quite late. But, I’m sure you can become a substitute in case someone can't make it.” You explained, hoping it wasn’t too much information for him to comprehend.
He nodded, unsure of what you really said. All he could focus on was the bumpy trail ahead of him and how close your voice was to his ear. He felt his face warm up as he cleared his throat, trying to forget about the feeling.
“If you want, we could—I mean, I could help you rehearse before the final play?” You asked. An odd silence fell between you two as you bit your bottom lips out of embarrassment. You weren’t sure whether or not that was the right move.
“Sure,” he began, catching your attention. 
“I’d like that.” He smiled as you smiled, fighting back the sigh of relief. 
You were glad you didn’t make things awkward between you two. Jay pushed you up, adjusting his hold on you, and continuing the walk in a comfortable silence, both of your hearts beating in sync.
ACT NINE.
Jay constantly stared at his phone all practice. He had given you his number the other day, just so you two could plan out a meetup, but you haven’t texted him at all. He thought maybe you were busy or you were too nervous to do so. 
This wouldn’t be the first time he had been told he was unapproachable.
Due to his calm yet serious demeanour, there were many incidents where people told him they were too scared to talk to him—his blue hair did not make it any better—even during class. Many students were afraid to be paired up with him, unaware of how sweet of a person he really was. Once they got to know him better, they stopped fearing him, but that didn’t go for students who hadn’t gotten to know him.
He sighed deeply and grabbed his packed duffle bag. It would be best to leave it alone for now. Maybe yesterday’s interaction was a fluke. He couldn’t get his hopes up in case you never texted. 
“Jay,” Sohee called. Jay looked over at the boy who leaned against the pole of a net. He motioned for him to come over as Jay followed through. 
“What’s up with you and Y/N?” He asked, crossing his arms in the process. 
What did he mean? Nothing was up, judging by how you weren’t texting him like you said you would. 
“Nothing, why?” Jay replied, more disappointed than ever. He didn’t want to say those words but had no choice. 
“It’s just, that you two were all buddy-buddy with each other for the rest of P.E. class,” Sohee explained. Jay’s mouth opened and closed a few times. No response. It was true that you were pretty close yesterday, but today? Not much.
“Ah, I was just worried, that’s all…” Jay said, regretting his words right after. He was supposed to be nonchalant about it. He couldn’t let his teammates know anything about his little ‘thing’ for you. 
Was it even a ‘little thing’ at this point? He didn’t know himself. 
“What about her asking about an audition?” Sohee asked, causing Jay to freeze. His arm dropped to his side, grip loosening on his phone but not enough for it to fall out completely. 
What did Sohee mean? Did he overhear them? Jay tried so hard to keep this a secret but was still caught in the end.
“Don’t tell me…” Sohee paused. “You were thinking of signing up weren’t you?” He asked still Jay remained silent. 
He couldn’t blow his cover. Especially after all how much he tried to keep it a secret, from you, his teammates, your club members. Everyone.
“So, it is true! No wonder you’ve been acting so out of place lately.” Sohee said, pushing himself off the pole as realization hit him. Jay looked around, hoping nobody overheard whatever he was saying. 
Luckily, there wasn’t anyone around—or so he thought there wasn’t. 
K emerged from the storage room, making his way over to the two boys. Jay looked over, eyes slightly widening. K was the last person that Jay wanted to overhear this conversation. 
“You’ve been ditching us, giving us cold shoulders, and everything for that club of freaks?” K asked, baffled. 
“Fair play, leader. So much for being there for us 24/7.” He said, rolling his eyes and scoffing. 
Jay gulped. Although he was mad, he was unsure of what right words to use at this moment. 
“They aren’t that bad,” Jay said, hoping those words were okay.
“Yeah, because they’re terrible! Did they brainwash you or something?” K’s eyes narrowed. Jay couldn’t hold back anymore. He didn’t want things to get physical, but they could’ve.
“See, this is why I didn’t tell you guys anything. Of course, I felt terrible for taking an interest in it. I didn’t want to ‘betray’ you guys, and K only made those thoughts worse.” Jay blamed, staring at K whose jaw dropped while he pointed at himself in disbelief. 
“Me?” K asked, walking towards Jay. 
“I’m the one who made your thoughts worse? I was just telling you the truth and how I felt about everything.” He admitted, but his words meant nothing to Jay.
“Exactly why I couldn’t tell you guys anything, especially you, K. I’m aware I haven’t been in the right state of mind, but do I know why? Not at all.” Jay said, adjusting his backpack.
“Nothing is making sense to me anymore, do I know why? Nope. I’m just as confused as you two.” Jay’s tone was quite harsh and irritating. He was frustrated and annoyed at what K had to say, causing his own words to flow out with no hesitation.
“Whatever. Go ahead, spread the word for all I care.” Jay said with an eye roll that was mainly directed at K.
K swore he felt his eye twitch as Jay turned around, walking away. How could he end his sentence that way?
“K, loosen up,” Sohee said, placing his hand on his shoulder. 
“If Jay wants to do something he can, you don’t have any say in it. You have to calm down, you’re so controlling over him. No wonder he couldn’t tell us about it.” Sohee ranted and K stood still.
He was shocked that even Sohee took Jay’s side. Of course, they were all mad at him and how he distanced himself away from the team, especially K. 
Still, was he really in the wrong? K sighed, letting out a deep breath he didn’t know he had in him. 
Jay walked through the school’s courtyard, eyes focused on his phone. There was still no message or call from you. Normally, you were everywhere around the school. He always managed to run into you, but today, you were nowhere to be found.
He had no clue where to look either.
He sighed, looking up from his phone, eyes meeting a sight he didn’t expect—your back facing him. He put his phone into his pocket, jogging towards you. He couldn’t lose you. It took him almost the whole day to find you anyway.
“Y/N.” Jay called, hand reaching out to yours. You stiffened at the familiar voice, pausing in your tracks. The soft gentle hold on your hand made you turn around, being met with a face you didn’t want to see.
Well, you would’ve if you didn’t find out about the news earlier.
“Finally, I found you. Is the plan from yesterday still up?” He asked, a slight smile making its way to his features. You couldn’t fall for it, especially with the way his dimple slowly appeared, you couldn’t fall for it. 
“What’s wrong?” He asked, brows furrowing. You stared at Jay’s face, he seemed worried. As if he had a reason to be, he was the cause of it all. You reached for the hand that held onto yours, removing it yourself, making his furrowed brows deepen. 
You turned away, taking your leave in his silence. As you walked away, the distance between you and Jay didn’t change. His constant footsteps that increased in sound as he chased after you was all that you needed to stop. 
“What?” You asked, abruptly stopping and turning around, causing him to stumble over his feet. 
“What do you mean,  what? What’s wrong with you?” He asked, confused. Why were you suddenly giving him attitude after ignoring his concerns and leaving him hanging? Shouldn’t it be the other way around?
You stayed silent. As much as you didn’t want to face him right now, he wasn’t giving you a choice not to. So, you might as well pop the question.
“Did you really do it?”
ACT TEN.
Jay’s pencil tapped against the surface of his desk as he stared out the window. He sneezed, attracting all the attention to him. 
“Bless you,” Mrs. Jang said as he sent her a sheepish smile. He whispered a soft thanks before returning his attention to the notes in front of him. He couldn’t come down with a cold, not before the team’s next game. The sudden downpour yesterday must’ve caused his little sneeze attacks. Although it was a bad rainstorm, it wasn’t as bad as his argument with you.
“Did you do it?” You asked, grip tightening on the straps of your backpack. 
“Do what?” He asked, becoming more confused. You bit your bottom lips, hesitating. You didn’t want to believe whatever you were told before, but it would still be best to hear it directly from him.
“Did you take the play’s script?” You asked, looking at your shoes and then at him. He stiffened at the question. This wasn’t the first time it happened. He also stiffened during the time you mentioned your fear of losing the play script on the park bench. 
The sun that shined on the two of you before, disappeared behind dark grey clouds. It was almost as if this conversation took place in a play due to the perfect timing of the rain. Jay’s eyes were wide. The thing he was afraid of most happened. He knew he should’ve told you sooner.
“So, you did? Wow—”
“I didn’t.” He interrupted you, his words coming out so suddenly. “Well, I was there, but I tried to stop them.” He explained, brows raising slightly. 
“You were still part of it,” you started, brows furrowing. “Weren’t you?” You asked as he gulped.
“What’s next? Did you purposely get close to me with the hope that I wouldn’t find out about this? And if I did, did you think I would have mercy on you?” You asked, hurt at the thought. 
“To be honest, I trusted you and told you about how I would feel if the play’s script ever went missing, yet you didn’t bother to speak up during that moment.” You explained, now looking at him. His mouth opened and closed constantly, but nothing came out. 
“Y/N,” Jay called, softly. It was almost like he was trying to swoon you over instead of addressing your accusations. If the situation was different, it might’ve worked. 
“Listen, I was going to tell you, but I couldn’t.” He said, searching your eyes for any change of emotion. 
“Why didn’t you?” You asked, raising a brow at him. 
“Because I didn’t want you to hate me.” Jay began. 
“Plus, I already felt bad enough when you told me about the fear and stuff, I didn’t want to make anything worse.” 
“You didn’t want me to hate you?” You asked, scoffing. 
“You made me doubt myself as a leader for a moment, Jay. As childish as it might be, losing the script made me feel terrible. And you knew about it but didn’t bother to tell me? Do you know what spot you put yourself in?” You ranted, leaving Jay no time to answer any questions.
“Y/N,” Jay paused. He didn’t know if the words he would say next would make matters worse or better.
“I don’t know what’s happening to me. Truly, I never really cared about the Drama club or took in my team’s hatred for them. They were just… there. But once you came along, I swear my life did a whole 180.” He said, hands clenching into fists at his sides.
“Do you want me to pity you?” You asked and he shook his head fervently. 
“Of course not. I’m just saying you’re always on my mind for whatever reason and I can’t even function because of that. As we grew ‘closer’ I always wanted to admit that incident, but I knew what the possible outcomes were. I never felt this way about anything, but ruining whatever we had between us made me feel as if the world was ending.” He continued as you listened.
“So, instead of speaking up. I returned the script in silence. Remember the day we ran into each other in the corridor? Yeah, I was running from Seungcheol. I know that was the wrong move and I should’ve told you instead of keeping quiet, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.” As Jay finished his sentence, droplets of rain began falling down from the grey clouds.
You stayed quiet, remembering back to the time you ran into Jay in the corridor. The way he held your hand made your heart race. You couldn’t bear with the increase in speed, so, you asked him to let go. 
You knew if he didn’t, your face would’ve definitely changed shades, making your supposed crush on him quite obvious. 
“Still not a smart choice.” You said before walking away as the rain became more heavier. Jay stood there in silence, staring at your back, his blue strands sticking onto his skin. 
He breathed in and out, eyes slowly opening and closing as he watched you leave. He couldn’t do anything about this. It was as if everything he took an interest in or did, ruined the relationships between him and those he was close to, including you and his teammates. 
You held your hand up to your chest, unsure if the racing in your heart was caused by Jay’s words or how fast you walked down the steps. You were mad at him, that was for sure, but he seemed genuine with his words and due to being the weak person you were, you would be lying if you said you didn’t fall for him even more.
Jay stood up, eyes wide, and his hands on his desk. Once again, all the attention was on him, including their teacher’s. His chair scraping on the floor was definitely the cause of that.
“Are you okay, Jay?” Mrs. Jang asked, catching him off guard. 
“Huh? Oh, yeah…” He mumbled while taking his seat. 
He couldn’t believe he uttered those words yesterday. He practically confessed to you and you made no reaction. Great, he embarrassed himself. Why was he so in love with you to the point where he couldn’t function straight?
“Jay,” a voice called gaining his attention. He looked up, noticing the many students who packed up their belongings and the two boys in front of him.
“Are you coming?” Eric asked, gesturing behind him with his thumb. Jay raised a brow at him, genuinely confused as to what he meant.
“...For lunch? We always eat together on the day of our games. Remember?” He elaborated, causing Jay to ‘ah’ in realization. It would be a lie if said he didn’t forget about today’s game. It was the last one of the season. He couldn’t play as sloppily as before.
He began to pack up his belongings, glancing at the two boys while doing so.
K stood beside Eric, a scowl present on his features. Clearly, he was forced to face him. The intense tension engulfed Jay as he cleared his throat, hoping it would clear the tension too. Sadly, it didn’t, but it did gain Eric’s attention.
“You’re done?” He asked and Jay nodded while swinging his backpack over a shoulder. 
“Do you think Coach will let you play today?” Eric asked Jay as the three walked down the halls. 
“Probably not. But, we will have to see.” Jay said with his words coming out as a sigh. K tensed beside him, quieter than ever. Usually, he would chat with them, but it was too awkward to do so.
Did he feel awkward because of yesterday’s chat? What if Jay and Sohee’s words really got to him? 
“K!” Eric shouted, startling K out of his thoughts. K turned around, noticing he missed the whole entrance to the cafeteria due to his distracted thoughts. 
“My bad,” he mumbled, making his way back to the two boys and then into the cafeteria without giving them another glance. Eric and Jay looked at each other and then shrugged, but before walking in, Jay spoke up.
“Wait,” he began, causing Eric to pause. “I thought you hated me? Why are you talking to me as if nothing happened?” He asked. 
“Not sure, but I never hated you. Yeah, there was a moment of disappointment, but we can’t decide your choices.” Eric flashed Jay a smile before walking into the cafeteria and making his way to the team’s table. The one Jay picked out back in freshman year. Although most were mad at him, at least they didn’t switch tables.
Jay caught up with Eric as they both took their seats at the filled table. The mood wasn’t as bad as Jay intended it to be. At practice, it was awkward and heavy, but right now, it was light and comforting. Truly, he missed days like these and his best friends, especially K. 
But clearly, it would take at least 1 light-year to build their previous bond again. 
“So, Jay,” Sohee called, causing Jay’s eyes to shift over to the male. Jay wasn’t even aware that he was staring at K who sat opposite Jay at the table. Sohee took a bite of his food before continuing his sentence.
“Did things escalate with Y/N?” He asked. Jay’s gaze briefly shifted over to K, his tensing figure not going unnoticed by the blue-haired boy. “What do you mean?” Jay asked, his eyes now on Sohee. 
“I heard she found out about the script issue…” He explained as everyone at the table looked at the two, excluding K.
“Shit, really?” Mark asked while stabbing his fork into today’s meal—pork chops. Sohee nodded at Mark’s question as K abruptly stood up, silencing Jay before he had the chance to reply. He grabbed his belongings and his untouched tray of food. 
“I’m not hungry. See you guys at the game.” He said before leaving them behind. Jay watched as K walked away, not sparing a glance at the team as he exited the cafeteria.
“Ignore him. He’s been like that ever since we all found out about you and Y/N.” Heeseung reassured Jay, causing him to look back in front of him. Jay nodded, smiling awkwardly before taking another bite of his bowl of rice.
The atmosphere became quite awkward as Jay tried to avoid the question as much as possible by staying silent. It worked but ruined the comforting mood that was present earlier. 
He wondered if you were still mad at him. Of course, he messed up, but he tried to stop them and still returned the script in the end. Although it took him a week to do so, he understood he should’ve confronted you about it once you two became close.
But for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He hated confrontation.
His last period wasn’t anything fun. It was just as boring as his other classes. Many classmates wished him good luck on his game while teachers excused him from their homework assignments. 
“Land a big one on them!” Mr. Lee exclaimed as Jay laughed awkwardly. He left his classroom at the same time as before—2:45 PM—and made his way to his locker. He promised his teammates he wouldn’t be late this time. There was nothing to distract him from doing so too. You were absent today. 
Or so he thought. 
Right when he shut his locker, he saw your figure a few meters away from his. His eyes widened as you rummaged through your locker. If that was your locker, how come he’s never seen you there? 
“Y/N?” Jay called, biting his lip right after. He didn’t mean for it to slip out.
You froze at the voice, pausing your movements as well. You then hurriedly grabbed your books and shut your locker while swiftly slipping on your lock before rushing away. You were avoiding him for a reason, so, why did you see him in the most unnecessary spot possible?
“Wait!” Jay exclaimed, jogging after you. You must be a fool if you thought you could escape an athlete like him. You stopped running and turned around, exhausted while Jay looked as if he didn’t move an inch.
Wow, he was lucky.
“What?” You asked in a bitter tone. Jay looked at his phone, the clock reading 2:47 PM. 
“I have three minutes to do this, so please don’t interrupt me” He pleaded as you stared at him. Although you showcased that you were unamused, you secretly were. 
“I’m sorry.” Jay began with a sigh. 
“I understand what I’ve done wrong. Even if I tried to stop them and returned the script, it can’t excuse my mistake, okay? I’m sorry if you felt as if I was taking advantage of you. I swear I wasn’t.” He explained as every word that escaped his mouth lingered with sympathy. 
“I believe you’re an amazing leader and that you should never doubt yourself, especially over a mistake like that one. It happens to the best of us.”
“Don’t forgive me, it’s fine. We can restart whenever you’re ready.” He finished off with a slight smile, checking his phone once more. There was only a minute left to hear your response. 
“So, what do you say?” He asked, a little panicky. You sighed while shaking your head. 
“You make it really hard to stay mad at you, you know? Why do your words have to be so heartfelt and picked out oh so carefully?” You said as a smile made its way to his face again. 
“I forgive you, but that doesn’t mean I won’t hold that mistake against you. One more mistake and whatever this is will end.” You warned while motioning between you both. He nodded and chuckled. 
You were well aware of his feelings for you. Yesterday’s argument was enough to confirm that he supposedly felt the same way you did. The only difference was, he didn’t know you felt the same way. Hopefully, he could find out before another mistake was made.
“You’re going to be late, go to your match. You need to at least warm up.” You ushered him down the hallway towards the gymnasium and waved him goodbye as he did the same. 
Now that everything was cleared up between you two, he would definitely do better in this match.
ACT ELEVEN.
“Starters for today, Ricky, Mark, Sohee, Jisung, and Jake.” Their coach said, causing the team to gasp. 
“What about K, Jay, and Eric?” Asked Jisung. He looked at the three who sat on the bench quieter than ever. This was the first time their coach had ever done this, of course, everyone was shocked.
“You guys will be fine. Today’s team isn’t that difficult, so let’s preserve their energy until it is needed.” He explained while marking something off on his clipboard. 
“Jay, are you in proper condition to play today?” He asked while making his way over to the boy. Jay looked up from his shoes and nodded at their coach's words. Their coach smiled, checking something off once again. 
“Perfect,” he began. 
“Okay, go out there and play well.” He said to the teammates who were said to play first. They followed through with his instructions and made their way to the court. Although there wasn’t any backup with their three-star players, they still had hope they could win.
Chemistry was all their team needed to win. So, K and Jay better make up before they had to step foot on the court.
Jay held out his fist that hid a wrapped-up peppermint in front of K’s view. K looked up from the ground at Jay’s hand and then his eyes shifted over to Jay who sat beside him. Jay opened his hand, revealing the peppermint to K.
“What?” K asked, staring at the sweet confused. Jay ushered him to take it as he followed through. 
“Good, now eat it,” Jay ordered as K’s brows furrowed. “Did you poison it or something? I wouldn’t be shocked if you did, I’ve been an ass lately.” K said while hesitating to unravel the sweet. 
Jay chuckled while looking at the players on the court getting into position. “At least you’re self-aware, but I have been one too. Still, I wouldn’t poison anything.” He said, rubbing his hands together.
“Listen, when we go on the court, we need to at least work together,” Jay explained, gaining K’s attention. 
“Just because we had multiple arguments and not the best friendship lately doesn’t mean we can let our team lose, and that doesn’t mean I fully forgive you.”
“I would take your advice for yourself if I were you,” K said, referring to the last time Jay played on the court. Jay sent him a glare.
“I’m in a good mood right now, do not blow it,” Jay warned while pointing at him which only made K burst out laughing. 
“Anyways, I wouldn’t dare to let our team lose. Glad, you’re finally acting like the team’s captain.” K teased as Jay softly punched him in the gut. K winced in pain as Jay playfully rolled his eyes and continued watching the game. 
Jisung had the ball, tossing it up in the air as it made its way into the net. An easy 3-pointer only a minute into the game was all they needed to kickstart their desire to win.
Perfect.
Eventually, Jay, K, and Eric were subbed in for the last two quarters. The new lineup included the three boys and Mark who seemed to be in great shape even after 24 minutes of playing. 
His stamina was insane.
“Focus,” Jay said from his spot in the key, turning his head to Mark across from him. 
“Don’t beat yourself up if you’re tired. Just ask Coach to sub you off, okay?” He reassured the boy as Mark nodded. 
The referee blew his whistle, passing the ball to the opposing team’s side. It was their ball when the second quarter ended anyway. 
Decelis’ boys were now spaced out on the court, guarding their opponents. The points were at a good distance with Jay’s team being at 36 and the other team being at 24. Still, there was no knowing when they’d catch up.
It could happen at any time.
The referee blew his whistle again as the opposing team inbounded their ball. Mark failed to block his opponent as they ran down the court to their goal, it was obvious he was soon going to reach his limit. 
Mark’s opponent passed the ball toward the player K was guarding—a rookie mistake. Never pass the ball if K was around. 
With that said, K caught the ball, shocking the opponent behind him. He dribbled the ball, dashing to the other side of the court as his teammates followed behind him. 
He paused at the three-point line, looking around for an open teammate. Mark was busy trying to get free from his defender and Jay did the same. 
Eric sprinted towards K’s spot with his blocker trailing behind him. Once Eric was practically beside K, they did a quick handoff, leaving Eric with no other option but to dribble toward the net and perform a neat lay-up. 
“Nice!” K exclaimed, high-fiving Eric as they both jogged towards the half point of the court. The boys were all beaming with satisfaction as all of their eyes held an intense desire to win. 
A few points into the third quarter, Mark asked their coach to sub him out for Heeseung. It was obvious how exhausted he was, but nobody blamed him. 
He played amazingly anyway.
The current score read 54-40. Clearly, they were catching up, but Decelis was still far ahead.
“I can’t believe you managed to convince me to come watch,” Kazuha said with her arm interlocked with yours as you guys walked through the bleachers. 
“It’ll be fun. Maybe you’ll learn not to hate them as much.” You explained as you both took a seat in front. 
“I hate being surrounded by basketball fans. They’re all sweaty and smelly, especially that one.” Kazuha said while pointing at K. You swatted at her hand, forcing her to lower it from the impact as K sent you guys a glare. Kazuha raised her fist and mouthed a curse word at his angry face as you laughed.
Was she really loud or was his hearing just really good?
Your eyes attentively watched Jay who wiped at the sweat that dribbled down his jawline. The gaze he held was the same gaze from the day you two finally spoke after two years. You will never forget that P.E. class.
He was very different than how he was off the court. Off the court, he’s a cold guy who is really clumsy while on the court, he seems unapproachable. It would be like having a death wish if you wanted to talk to him.
“Y/N,” Kazuha started while watching your eyes beam at the sight of Jay playing. 
“You like him, don’t you?”
“What?” You asked, chuckling nervously. 
“Do you like their team captain? You won’t take your eyes off of him even while talking to me.” Kazuha explained as you turned to look at her. 
“Here, I’m looking.” You said as she smirked and pointed at you. “You’re blushing. You do like him!” She exclaimed as your eyes widened. You covered your cheeks with your hands while swatting at her teasing finger.
“Enough!” You whisper-shouted not wanting to attract any more attention to you two, but failed. Jay’s eyes were already on you as a silly smile made its way to his face.
The sight he saw answered all his questions. It was an obvious one, yet he denied it continuously. There was only one reason why you were always on his mind.
He was definitely in love with you.
The next day, the game was all everyone spoke about. The winning shot performed by K and Jay would definitely go down in Decelis's history. Jay threw the ball into the air as K came out of nowhere, dunking it into the hoop, the buzzer going off right after.
Everyone including their opposing team was shocked. No wonder they were part of the ‘star-players lineup’.
Slowly, K and Jay’s friendship began to be restored. Even if they were becoming friends again, the incidents from before weren’t forgotten, and K was very aware of that. It’ll take quite a while to make up for the things he has said and done.
“Wow, they weren’t playing,” Eric joked while eyeing K’s decorated locker. 
“Ours must be worse…” Eric mumbled internally filled with excitement. He wondered what his locker looked like.
“They got you too,” K said pointing at Jay’s locker down the hall, “And Jisung.” K chuckled. 
Their school must love them a lot to take time out of their day to decorate. It did make sense to do so, they won the whole season.
Eric boasted about a game he played when they got home yesterday. Even after the exhausting match, he still had enough energy to check out his favourite game’s new update. 
To Jay, it felt nice to be included in things like this again. There were no more nasty glares being sent his way as he watched from afar. Things were slowly starting to go back to normal.
“Jay, your phone’s ringing,” Eric said, pausing his conversation topic. Jay looked at the boy confused then down at his vibrating pocket. 
He removed his phone from his pocket, eyeing the contact name with wide eyes. “I’ll be back,” Jay said before walking away from his friends and picking up the phone.
He stood in front of his locker, leaning against the decorations. 
“Hey.” Jay greeted, waiting for a response back. He slowly became anxious at the quietness. Did you 
“Hey.” You greeted on the other line, causing Jay’s heart to flutter. He mentally cursed at his heart, hoping the beating would slow, but it didn’t. 
“So… I was wondering if that deal was still up?”
“Yeah, of course,” he said, “I mean, as long as you’re free!” Jay exclaimed. He didn’t want his words to sound forceful. 
You smiled at his words, writing down some words in your notebook. “Anything is fine with me. I’m free tomorrow… How about 12 PM?” You asked while clicking your pen shut. 
It was a Saturday after all. What plans did Jay really have on a Saturday?
He hummed in agreement, turning around to unlock his locker with a smile. K and Eric grimaced at the sight as K shut his locker closed. 
“Who has him smiling like a dork…?” K asked, brows furrowing. He’s never seen their captain like this before.
“I wonder…” Eric muttered, mirroring the exact expression as K. 
They both paused, looking over at each other with slightly wide eyes, “Y/N.”
ACT TWELVE.
Jay rocked back and forth on the soles of his feet anxiously. The clock read 11:55 AM, 5 minutes before the two were supposed to meet. He was a punctual person, of course, he wasn’t early on purpose…
“Jay!” Your voice brought him out of his thoughts as his eyes looked in your direction quickly. You were smiling at him.
At him.
“Wow, you look happy.” He teased while making his way towards you. You were smiling from ear to ear because you were finally able to hang out with him, of course, you were happy.
“I received great news.” You cheered, clasping your hands together. He stared at you a slight smile on his own features with his hands stuffed in the pockets of his sweater as he teasingly raised a brow.
“Which is?” He asked.
“I was chosen to be this year’s valedictorian!” You said, your smile growing even more. Jay’s eyes widened in shock. 
That was truly great news.
“Really? That’s great, Y/N.” He smiled with that dimple you hated oh so much showing. You hated how it made your face warm and butterflies in your stomach swarm. 
But wait… Valedictorian? 
“Wait, graduation is in a month, right?” He asked, the thought of this being his final year completely forgotten. You nodded at his question, confused yourself.
“Did you forget?”
“...Yeah.” He mumbled in embarrassment. You laughed at his sheepishness, waving your hand in the air.
“That’s fine. It happens, honestly. Anyway, our play is in a week. Everyone has been practicing like crazy, I don’t think anyone won’t be able to make it, but we can still practice if you want.” You said, playing with the felt of your clothes. 
Jay nodded. Anything was fine with him. Although he really wanted to participate in your club’s play previously, due to all the commotion that happened within these two months, he wasn’t sure if he felt the same way. 
He was still glad he met you at least. 
You two strolled through the garden you suggested as the meeting place. This was a good way to clear your mind and prepare yourselves for the script reading. 
The garden was a very pretty sight. You pulled out your phone, positioning your camera in front of any pretty flower you crouched before. 
“It’s pretty, right?” You asked, eyeing the pink flower in front of you. 
A Hibiscus. 
“Yes, it’s very pretty,” Jay replied, crouching behind you, “Just like you.” He whispered, startling you. 
Immediately, you turned around, flinching and falling backwards due to how close he was. His arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you back up before you could fall into the field of flowers.
You both stared into each other’s eyes as the wind rustled through the pedals on every flower in the field. You cleared your throat as Jay’s arm unravelled from your waist, but you caught your balance before you could fall over.
“My bad, I didn’t mean to scare you.” He apologized while standing up. You shook your head, trying to shake away the butterflies as well. 
“It’s okay.” You muttered, eyes going back to your phone. The photo you took by accident was blurry and was most likely taken when you were falling. You couldn’t recognize anything aside from the vibrant pink blur. 
You swiped backwards, satisfied with this photo instead. It showed the flowers, picking up the different shades of pink and the fading droplets of water. Jay looked around in an attempt to distract himself from the encounter from earlier. 
It was a mistake, he swore it was, yet part of him wanted it to happen again.
“Do you want to get something to eat? I’m pretty sure there’s a cafe nearby. We can read over the script there.” You suggested, pulling him out of his thoughts. 
“Ah, sure, why not.” He said, giving you an awkward smile. You stood up, dusting off your pants as Jay did the same. He stuffed his hands back in his pockets and followed you out of the field of flowers. 
The walkout was silent. A little too silent for Jay’s liking.
“To be honest,” he started, gaining your attention. You hummed in response, eyes examining any flowers in your sight.
“You’re as beautiful as an orange flower,” he said, “If you were in a garden, I would definitely choose you first.”
You laughed at his words, thinking they were silly even if they made you flustered.
“I’m serious.”
You paused and turned around to face him, causing him to stop in his tracks.
“Why an orange flower? What about blue flowers?” You asked, genuinely curious. Was orange his favourite colour or something? If it was… wouldn’t he have dyed his hair orange instead of blue?
“Because,” he began, “It’s scientifically proven that orange is an eye-catching colour. To prove my point, you caught my eye that same day in P.E. class.” 
Your eyes slightly widened at his sudden confession, but you then regained your composure. A sly smile made its way onto your features as you looked at Jay with narrowed eyes.
“Are you confessing to me again?” You asked and he nodded. Without hesitation, he nodded. 
“You didn’t say anything to the first one…” He explained as you shook your head. It’s not that you didn’t say anything. You just didn’t know how to formulate words at that exact moment. You grabbed his hand, interlocking it with yours and dragged him towards the entrance at a faster pace.
“Let’s make a deal.” You said once you reached the arched entry. “Can you wait an extra month?” You asked as his brows furrowed.
“A month? What for?” He asked, leaving your question unanswered. 
“Yes or no?” You asked, this time leaving his question unanswered. 
Jay hesitated. He didn’t want to choose the wrong answer. This only reminded him of the time K and Eric dragged him to the club room—the start of everything. Back then, he regretted agreeing with the boys and he worried if that would happen with you. Still, it wouldn’t hurt to take a risk, right?
“Yes.” He said as you smiled in return. 
“Good.” 
ACT THIRTEEN.
The final month of being a senior went by faster than Jay expected. Ever since that day you and Jay hung out, you never brought up your question. He still had no clue what you meant by waiting a month, but he did it anyway.
There were many moments where he uttered the words ‘I love you’ or complimented you numerous times. He didn’t have anything to hide anymore, right? You knew he loved you and he made sure you did almost every single day.
That didn’t mean you said the three words back to him. You never did. Although it bothered him a little bit and caused him to doubt if what he was doing was right, you always managed to make him fall head over heels for you all over again.
Here he was, standing on stage with his coach and principal who presented him with the scholarship he waited his whole life for. He didn’t start playing basketball at the age of 7 for nothing.
As he listened to the principal speak, he was reminded of his freshman days. It felt like he was filling out that scholarship form just yesterday. It was still shocking that this was his last day in Decelis.
“Thank you,” he said while bowing and smiling at his principal as he took the envelope in hand. He then turned to look at his coach who seemed more emotional than ever, leaving Jay baffled. 
“Shouldn’t I be the emotional one?” Jay asked while walking off the stage with his coach.
“There’s just something in my eye.” He said. 
What a lie. Nobody would believe that one. 
Jay scoffed and shook his head as he made his way back to his seat. He was congratulated by a few classmates on his way there, stopping a few times to high-five some of them. There was a bright smile on his face, feeling satisfied that he finally accomplished his dream. 
Younghoon gave Jay a proud pat on the back from his seat behind Jay, feeling like a proud dad. It was something he always did when he felt proud of Jay.
“Now, please welcome this year’s valedictorian, L/N Y/N.” The school’s principal announced through the mic as you rose from your seat, making your way to the stage. 
As you walked past Jay’s seat, you glanced over at him flashing him a smile as he did the same. 
You adjusted the mic, levelling it to your desire, and turning it on in the process. You flipped through the script on the podium, finding your speech that you’ve practiced a ton of times.
“Good evening, staff, my fellow seniors, and most importantly, family members.” You began, gripping the sides of the podium as a smile made its way to your face. 
“I’m L/N Y/N, your valedictorian for this ceremony. First, I want to start by congratulating this year’s graduating class. Time flew by faster than we all expected, right? To me, it still feels like I was preparing for my first day as a freshman in Decelis just yesterday, worrying about what I should wear even if this is a uniform school.” You joked, making a few students hum in agreement and laugh at your words as Jay watched with an adoring smile. 
“I know how much it may hurt to say goodbye to those you adored, but take this as an opportunity to branch out and explore new things. I had an amazing time with this school’s Drama Club and enjoyed being the leader. It taught me a lot more than I intended to learn.” You said, gaze shifting to Jay.
“It taught me how fun taking risks and stepping out of your comfort zone can be. How fun exploring the personalities of others can be even while going against the established yet unconfirmed rule that says you must hate each other.” 
It was obvious that you were referring to the Drama club and Basketball team rivalry and the unsaid person was obviously Jay. Who else broke that unconfirmed rule with you?
“The events that occurred this year really brought me an enjoyable and exciting final year of high school, so I’m very grateful for it.” You finished off your speech with a closing sentence that thanked everyone for coming and wished all the graduating students the best of luck for their future. 
Soon after your speech, all students received their diplomas and medals, meaning they were no longer high school students.
You and Jay were no longer the leaders of the Drama club and Basketball team or classmates from P.E. class. 
“You were great.” Jay complimented you after finding you in the school’s courtyard. You turned around, smiling at his words. 
“Congrats on the scholarship!” You cheered, a smile appearing on his face. Before he could reply, you were already dragging him by the hand through the crowds of people, and running towards the steps you guys last argued on.
“What are we doing here?” He asked, looking around, noticing how nobody was there. They were all taking pictures to reminisce about the moment a few years later.
“So—”
He was silenced by the sudden kiss planted on his cheek, causing him to look at you faster than ever. His eyes were wide open and his mouth was slightly agape at the sudden movement. You looked into his wide eyes with your curious ones.
“What was that about?” He asked in utter shock.
“I love you,” you confessed, his wide eyes becoming even wider. He blinked continuously, thinking this was all a dream.
“What?” You asked, tilting your head to the side. 
“Am I going crazy, or did you really say I love you?” He asked as your eyes widened. 
“You must be going crazy. I said no such thing.” You lied, putting on your best poker face. Your hand removed his cap, feeling his forehead temperature to complete the act. 
“Your temperature is fine though… Did you not sleep enough?” You asked, concerned. You loved being able to pull these types of tricks on him. His reactions were always cute to you.
“I’m kidding, I did.” You said, smiling. You couldn’t keep up the lie anymore, especially with this way his brows furrowed in disappointment. 
“It has been a month. I waited it out until today. I didn’t want to interrupt our studies if we ever started anything, you know,” you said while letting go of his hand, “And it would’ve been a mistake if I didn’t confess the same place you first did.” You said while looking around the area you stood in.
It really was your last time walking down these steps.
Out of nowhere, your face was cupped by slightly rough hands that brought warmth to your cheek, turning your head to face Jay’s direction. You had no time to register anything, his soft lips on yours.
Although you weren’t prepared, you still sunk into the kiss, but Jay pulled away before anything could escalate. His hands still cupped your face as you both looked into each other’s eyes, ‘sneaking’ small glances at each other’s lips.
“I love you too.” He said, his words filled with genuine adoration. 
“Cool,” you muttered in disappointment. It was too short for your liking. Jay was shocked, wondering why you didn’t say it back. He waited so long just for you to say it once?
“I love you too, okay? Stop overthinking it.” You said, playfully rolling your eyes. His facial expression made it quite obvious as to what he was thinking.
“Now, come here.” You said, pulling him into another kiss while dropping his cap on the concrete ground beside him. Luckily, this one lasted much longer than before. 
Even if he didn’t participate in anything related to the Drama club, he still got himself involved with one of their members, right?
That should at least count.
Ξ © HAKNOM, 2024
707 notes · View notes
seeingivy · 9 days
Text
picnic
sukuna x f!reader
**part of my best friend's older brother fic
previous part linked here
(^^make sure you check since this was a double upload and I posted the last one very recently :D)
--
dear head of the cullen clan,  keep evening plans open – im getting off work early and we’re going on a picnic.  coldest regards,  the head of the volturi  (ps. am expecting a very wholehearted appreciation for the fact that it’s coldest regards and not warmest regards, because they are, in fact, vampires and therefore cold. because they don’t have a heart and such.)  (extra ps. this is a link to a shared spotify playlist. i’ll add a song and then you add one. we’ll keep it going.) 
you snort. 
dear aro of the volturi (does he have a last name???),  so much to unpack in one email, yet again. you really know how to keep a girl on her toes.  first and foremost, you are SOOOO ran through. so offended that i wasn’t the person who got to put you on to twilight and whoever it was, I HOEP SHE DIES! if you’re team jacob, you’re a freak.  second, SO VERY FLATTERED that you think i would be carlisle. a little haunting that you think YOU would be aro…but it’s ok cuz former companions to enemies back to lovers in our case would be kind of crazy???  third. done and done. i just added a song so hurry up bc i have like ten other songs i want to add and i am #impatient  see u after work pookie :D,  carlisle cullen  (very appreciative of the cold regards. you are a king among men.) 
his response back is very prompt. 
Never call me pookie again.  (very offended that you think i’d be stupid enough to be team jacob. and direct your murderous rage towards yuuji and my mom, who forced me to watch it in theaters with them.) 
--
you wait for sukuna at the park two blocks down the apartment complex. the sun is hours away from dipping into the horizon, the chilly wind rustling through the trees. you realize now that the red skirt and white sweater might betray you in a few hours but decide that you’ll simply have to steal his jacket when he gets here. 
and you would have already but he’s twenty minutes late.
and while this part of the city is extremely safe, sukuna’s ever constant fear of people attacking you on subway trains and stabbing you in alleyways has instilled an acute fear of strangers in you, which is why you’re gripping the sparkly pink pepper spray he bought you very harshly in your palm right now. 
you think it’s sweet that he bought you a pink one. 
but of course it’s severely ironic that you almost used it on him. 
because he scares the living daylights out of you, by placing his hand around your shoulder from behind. 
“hey. i’m sorry i-” 
“jesus fuck-” 
you instinctively hold the pepper spray up to his face, your hands shaking in front of you. 
“i’ll use it, you pervert!” 
sukuna leans his head to the side, which is when you’re finally able to log that it’s actually him standing in front of you and not a stranger, and you drop your hands in embarrassment. 
“i mean, i’d really appreciate it if you wouldn’t doll face but–” 
“oh my god, sukuna. i thought you were trying to rob me!” 
“i’m smarter than that. the only thing inside your purse is lip gloss, which has very little value to me.” sukuna responds, dropping the little basket at his feet and taking the little stalk of flowers out of the top handle. 
“i’ll have you know that it’s actually sold out in every store right now. so you could make bank if you sold it.” 
“don’t tempt me. and for your sake, i’ll accept the apology you didn’t give me for just trying to rob me of my eyesight and for calling me a pervert? i’m getting really tired of the age gap jokes, y/n.” sukuna responds, as he lifts your hands at your sides and places the stalk of flowers in your hand. 
you give him a big smile as you press your nose to the flowers, the scent fresh in your nose. and sukuna props down, setting a billowing white blanket on the ground before he taps the spot next to him and signals for you to sit next to him. 
“who needs eyes?” you joke, as you squeeze his hands and set the flowers down next to the little basket. 
“me, dipshit. how else am i supposed to look at you?” 
you cover your hands with your cheeks as you watch him place all of the little things inside the basket next to you, laying them out perfectly. it’s albeit a weird assortment – two wine glasses, perfectly wrapped sandwiches, a mini-cake, and strawberry lemonade. 
“well, stop perceiving me. this is so weird!” you murmur. 
it’s enough to catch his attention and stop him in his tracks. 
“what?” 
the question makes you pause. and a little embarrassed. it was a little harsh to say while you were joking.
“oh, i mean…i didn’t mean it like that! i was making a joke about perceiving because eyes…vision…and i almost took your vision away! and you perceive with your eyes, because how else would you see…” 
sukuna smiles, before shaking his head, and continuing spilling out the last of the contents – a set of gouache paints and two little small canvases. and he drops to his feet, yanking his shoes off, before sitting flat on the blanket and gesturing for you to join him. 
“there’s no way in hell that was what you meant. but we’ll ignore that for the time being.” sukuna responds, hiking his legs to his chest and gesturing towards the spread he just put out. 
you tilt your head to the side in confusion. 
“you look very pretty today.” sukuna responds. 
“thanks! you too!” 
he narrows his eyes. 
“uh huh. well, pick what we do first. the paint, the sandwiches, or the weird wine glass cake.” 
“the wine glass cake? like from tiktok?” you ask. 
“correct. i’m really bad at…cute dates. so…i did some research.” 
sukuna refuses to look at you. because after admitting it, he’s suddenly busied himself with reading the back of the box of paints, like it’s the most riveting, intriguing thing he’s ever read in his life. 
but the pink flush that’s creeping down his neck betrays him entirely, as you reach forward and push the little box down. and sukuna’s already glaring at you. 
you place your chin on the top of his knees, reaching for one of his hands and smiling. 
“you did research for a date?” 
“you can choke on your spit.” 
you grin. 
“you really know how to turn a girl on.” 
“you’re filthy.” 
you grin. 
“and you’re actually so precious, i–” 
“don’t call me precious, y/n.” he whines, as he reaches forward to flick on your forehead. 
you smile as you sit by his side, tucking the folds of your skirt under your leg as you reach for both of the wine glasses and hand him one. 
“so how humbling was it to have satoru explain all this to you?” you ask. 
he sneers. 
“don’t even ask. he’s like the biggest nuisance i’ve ever met in my life. top ten worst moments of my life.” sukuna responds. 
“i’m flattered you humbled yourself to him for me.” 
“i actually asked suguru. they’re like…two peas in a pod, they can’t do shit without each other. the paints and stuff they gave me and the nice basket too.” 
“that’s sweet of them. remind me to send them something later to thank them.” 
sukuna scoffs. 
“no need. they were more than happy to give it up for you.” 
“ah yes. i hear they’re big fans of this camping bag story. the scouts honor and the fake story we had to tell them makes a lot more sense now.” you respond. 
sukuna rolls his eyes. 
“okay, you know what? sue me. i was like sixteen sleeping next to a girl for the first time. god forbid i enjoyed myself. and i don’t know why they’re all so hyperfixated on that story because it was a very normal thing to assume when you’re asked that question.”  
you snort. 
“and you say you’re not a pervert…” 
sukuna leans forward, his eyes flitting down to his lips before he looks back up at you. and he can tell that you’re in a mood, that you’re trying to push his buttons by annoying him. 
“you know i despise you right?” he whispers. 
you grin, leaning in. 
“is that right?” you whisper back. 
“oh yeah. you irritate me.” 
there isn’t even a shred of earnestness in the words he’s uttering. you know he doesn’t mean them. 
“keep going.” you respond, as he presses a warm kiss to the side of your cheek. 
“you’re a nuisance.” – a kiss to your forehead. 
“an irritation.” – a kiss to the tip of your nose. 
“like a fucking thorn in my side.” – and a kiss to the sweet spot right in your neck and his hand snaking up your thigh, which makes you nearly keel your head back from the sensation. 
you place your hands on his cheek and pull him back, face flushed and his eyes nearly glazed over. 
“are you crazy?” you whisper. 
“what?” he asks. 
“we’re in public, dumbass. you can’t just start trying to rile me up.” 
sukuna leans back, obliging. 
“so you admit it? i was riling you up?” 
“oh, shut up.” 
you reach for the sandwiches and unpeel one for sukuna. before he takes it, he places a tiny white box in your lap. 
you frown. first the fancy date but the jewelry too? 
“sukuna. you didn’t–” 
“just open it. i’m impatient and i’ve been waiting all day. and i actually think you’ll like it. otherwise, you’re ungrateful and rude and you hate me.” sukuna responds. 
you give him a tight lipped smile before you open the little box and actually smile. 
it’s a dainty silver chain – the exact same as sukuna’s from the chain-links, but the build is a little thinner. and right at the center, a little charm of a star. 
you reach forward for his chain, dangling around his collarbone. and surely enough, in addition to the original charm he had of an interlocked circle, there’s a star charm added right next to it. 
“you always reach for it. when you’re talking or when we’re kissing. figured i’d get you your own since you’re such a big fan.” 
“you are so…” 
“perfect? sexy? the father of your children?” 
“i was thinking adorable. can i answer d for all of the above?” you respond. 
sukuna grins. 
“survey says yes, princess.” he responds. 
you yank the chain from the little box and hand it to him, before turning around for him to secure it on you. his fingers tickle against the nape of your neck, accompanied by a warm kiss, before he taps your shoulders to signify that he’s done. 
“you know. you really are perceiving me right now.” you respond. 
“and how’s that?” 
“i know you’re obsessed with me and pay attention to every word i say.” 
sukuna smiles. 
“obviously.” 
you jab at his side. 
“i mean, i know you’re doing this because i mentioned picnics yesterday and always feeling left out. sure you could put two and two together that he never really bought me any nice gifts or anything when i said he ruined my birthday.” 
“okay, captain obvious. and?” 
you shove him once more, before leaning your head against his shoulder. 
“well, i appreciate it. i know the whole…cutesy painting date isn’t your thing. we won’t have to do it again. and that you…you’re trying to make this whole thing special for me.” 
sukuna scoffs. 
“i’m offended. first and foremost, i always like to eat with you. every time i think that there’s no way you can amaze me more, you find another way to spill food on your clothes.” 
“hey! that’s not true.” 
“you already spilled on the blanket. second, this is a very violent way to eat cake. you literally mess up all the layers by doing that and destroy the piping on the cake which i can admit, i am a fan of. and third, i’m going to paint us as worms, which seems enjoyable to me.” 
you curl your nose. 
“worms?” 
“yeah. what were you going to paint?” 
“i don’t know. but it certainly wasn’t going to be worms. like the park or flowers or something.” 
“boring. i’m going to paint us as slimy worms. and because we made it on this date, you’ll have to agree to put it up in the apartment, even if it’s ugly.” 
“sukuna.” you whine. 
“especially if it’s ugly. it’s a testament to our love.” he responds, dramatically placing his hands on  his chest. 
“you know, you’re so right. worms have been a really defining feature of your relationship.” 
sukuna leans forward and presses a quick kiss to your lips and an additional one on your cheek. 
“you just get me, princess!” 
and he breaks the little joke by lifting one of your hands to his lips, and pressing a kiss on all four of your knuckles before pressing your hand to his cheek. 
“and i have to do special things for a special person.” 
you return the gesture, lifting his tattooed fingers to your lips and doing the same. 
“you know…you’re really good at this type of thing.” you murmur. 
“what do you mean?” 
“i mean, being a boyfriend. and…and being supportive about everything. sometimes i feel like i’m trying really hard to be the best but…just comes naturally to you.” you respond. 
sukuna shrugs. 
“don’t know if i’m perfect but…loving you has always come really easy to me. i don’t really have to think twice about it because these are actually just things i want to do for you.” 
you groan. 
“see! that’s what i’m saying! you always just…say sweet things, do sweet things. sometimes i’m convinced i’m not even half deserving of it, just because sometimes i don’t reciprocate that back.” you respond. 
sukuna leans forward. 
“you know, you actually do though.” 
“as if.” you groan. 
sukuna pauses, before leaning his cheek against the tops of his knees and looking out at the expanse of grass in front of you. you follow his line of vision – to the dog running in the distance, the wide, billowing trees, and the little flower truck on the side – which you now realize is where sukuna copped the flowers from earlier. 
“i mean, this type of thing. that we have, or…or the way i act around you. it means a lot to you because, you…you’ve never had this before. right?” 
“yeah.” 
“well, i haven’t had you before. i know you see me as perfect, but…but when you say that i can tell that you don’t mean it the way my mom or…or yuuji think that i’m perfect. in the untouchable way.” 
you lean forward, cupping the side of his face. 
“sukuna. you’re so touchable.” you joke. 
“you’re disgusting.” 
“you love it.” 
sukuna smiles. 
“yeah, i really do. it does actually mean the world to me that you think i’m perfect how i am and don’t think i’m larger than life.” 
“if anything, your ego could be smaller.” 
sukuna leans forward and presses a kiss to your cheek. 
“and…and even the other day. i know you were acting squirrely and weird when yuuji was near us and heard us bickering, but i was half convinced that you were going to take his side at the end, when he started saying that stuff about me. because it is true and i have acted a certain way in the past…and, you would have every right to agree with him if you wanted to.” 
you frown. 
“no, i wouldn’t. you’ve never treated me like that and i know you’re being earnest when you say these things to me. this would be a very elaborate way to get into my pants if that was what you were trying to do. and i know it’s not.” 
sukuna smiles. 
“that’s what i’m saying. every other person for me has never given me that benefit of the doubt, but you always do. you were the person who thought to tell me that my grandpa died when you all came to get me and you were the one who wasn’t mad at me. the things you do for me are the same, in equal magnitude, as what i do for you. if this makes you feel good, or…or on top of the world, you have to know that’s how you make me feel too. i’m half convinced that you’re basically made for me at this point the way you get everything right on point.” 
you lean forward and press a lingering kiss to his lips. 
“i really think you’re made for me too, ryomen.” 
sukuna groans, dramatically leaning his head back, before nearly pushing you over and peppering kisses to almost every surface on your face. 
“quit fucking saying my name. you have no idea what that does to me.” 
“i mean, i think i have an idea.” 
sukuna clamps his fingers over your mouth, before pressing a few more lingering kisses to your face and pushing off. and subsequently, picks all of the grass out of your hair as you roll your eyes. 
and after that sukuna, admittedly, very aggressively uses the wine glasses to portion off little slices of the cake and makes it a point to finish off yours when you can’t stomach the sweetness. and true to his promise – sukuna paints the two of you as worms, but at the park, stargazing. 
it’s a little silly, the way he paints it. you were expecting it to be more gory or gross, but it’s so corny that it makes you smile. because he draws the two little worms, but distinguishes between the two of you, by swiping some of your pink paint and adding a little ribbon to the one that’s supposed to be you. 
sukuna explains the stars. because before sukuna had dragged you out of that shitty bathroom bar, it’s what megumi and yuuji said in his drunken mess – he had pointed at two little stars and likened them to him and megumi.
and you’re almost positive that at the time, sukuna found it utterly ridiculous. but now, he understood it – the sentiment. that you and sukuna were two little worms, and two stars, and two little flowers too. 
and to his promise, the two of you decide to place the little canvases you drew at the end of the kitchen counter. 
it’s only then that you realize that you have to go the whole ten miles for sukuna the way he had done for you – countless times again. and that if you were going in blind in trying to make something special, you’d have to take a page out of his book and do some research. 
and there was only one person who could really help you, who you’d rather die than humble yourself to than ask for help. 
regardless of that, you still call sammy the next morning.
--
an: they're about to do it. anyways....there is a very real playlist to match the one that they talk about in the fic -- and it matches the way it described in the fic! so it's interleaved, the first song is a song that sukuna would have added, the second one that y/n added, the third sukuna, so on and so forth. it's linked here! happy listening babies
second an: thank you for the love on the last chapter. it makes my heart really warm bc all of that was actually based on a REAL MAN and real things that I have felt/have said to me and just having people comment that they felt seen by it or it made them feel a certain type of way actually made me really happy and so warm. this blog was one of the first things I did after I stopped being really, really sad and i'm glad that i'm able to share a little joy here and there, if that's what this fic is for you. anyways this is long and sappy and gross and actually I just love you all for enduring the ouchies and the sillies with me a little bit 💌
third an: double upload bc yall were so patient with me :D
taglist: @porridgesblog @k0z3me @kayleegomez @yihona-san06 @sweetenertea @skzismyhome @mykyoon @violetmatcha @rebeccawinters @shotenvinsoot @itzmeme @gojoswifeyyys-world @cutiejg @chilichopsticks @ghostreadersthings @charlie-xo @whoami-72 @heijihattorisgf @megu-meow @complexivelovely @multiplefandomthings @hoebuns @lzaj19 @glossygreene @ramluvr @sureconfused @najaemism @manduse @imhorn1help @gamergirl5125 @r0ckst4rjk @invisible-mori @isaacdaknight @wishmemel @gyros-cum-sock @suftsunshine @i0099 @cowgirlikets @haitanibros0007 @stuffeddeer @yoontaedotin @ec3lipsy @armani79 @awkwardaardvarkforever @kereseth @leave-rae-alone @ruruvia @princess-ackerman @jjkwritingss @lilkiwikiara @opchara @telepathicheartss @starriesworlds @raechu11 @exprimidordefresas @nxxrxm @aalloochaat @strangehuman101 @tzutology
287 notes · View notes
onlyseokmins · 9 months
Text
the devil wears baby blue • h.j.s.
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Pairing: joshua hong x afab!reader Genres: smut (minors PLS dni!), strangers to fucking lol Warnings: joshua hong himself 🚩🚩, swearing, alcohol, reader is a menace and tease too i'm ngl, grinding, groping, slight exhibition kink, degradation, name-calling, objectification, FINGERS (all of it fingering, riding, etc), mentions of knife/surgery, choking, wbk but major hints to big cock josh 💔, marking, licking, alluding to devil imagery uwu, roleplay sort of but not really, kind of public sex acts + a mirror, manhandling, lil slaps, dangerous fashion decisions + "fun" clothing shenanigans during sex ig????, mentions of car sex and oral sex (male rec.), dirty talk (joshua won't stfu), edging, lil bit of pain kink if you squint ❤️‍🩹, and tons of banter/insults, is there a thing like a wealth kink??? - as always lmk if i missed smth WC: 7k A/N: *taps mic* would love to thank @onlymingyus and @duhnova for proofing, hyping, and supporting me on this. also ofc a huge honorary shout out to @hwanghyunjinenthusiast for the constant cheering and screeching at me in and out of dms - hope you enjoy this hehe. idk if jackie will see this but her watch post(s) helped re-inspire me to attack this wip. and finally blowing kisses to the joshushushus in my inbox, i hope you'll like this! ps if anyone recognizes where the last dialogue is from, you receive a kiss on the forehead from me and get to spend one night with joshua!! 😏
↪ this is a loosely based prequel to idiot
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Seungkwan's hand lays steady on your back, guiding you through the crowd much more efficiently than you could have on your own. He has a way of navigating through the waves of people with practiced ease whereas you would rather just be swept away. It's why you enjoy going to the club with him, especially one as crazy as tonight's.
You would think you were still on the dance floor with how many people are bustling around you, mingling and giggling just as much on the sidelines as they do moving to the music. Drinks in hand, they chat and flirt with one another so it takes nearly twice as long to make it to the bar than you think it really should.
"This better be worth it," you shout directly into your friend's ear despite how close you are to him. "For the amount of times my feet have been stepped on!"
There's a sharp pinch from his fingers that snuck to your side. "Told you not to wear those stupid shoes." 
Though you can't exactly hear it, you can see how his pouty lips purse out in a huff. He's also grumbling under his breath and you're able to catch bits and pieces. Things like, "won't matter" and "swept off your feet anyways" and "don't blame me" make you roll your eyes.
"Acting like this is my social debut with the prince of wales."
"Someone's been watching too much Bridgerton. And with how often you fail to come —" he's interrupted by the loud thumping of the bass, "makes sense."
"You can't possibly compare me against your standards, Mister Social Butterfly. You know everyone… and you've probably screwed a lot of them as well."
Seungkwan can only guess a gist of what you actually say and is therefore mildly tempted to let you get lost in the sea of people like he knows you'd rather prefer. But he's finally made it all the way over to what seems like an impenetrable social circle, though the group readily parts to make room for the two of you to squeeze in. So, he'll have to bring you along for the adventure. 
"Hey there!" 
"Hello!"
"Fancy seeing you here."
"I know, right?" 
Greetings are easily interchanged. Most of them are familiar faces — friends of your own or people you've gotten to know simply through Seungkwan's ever-growing collection of new instagram posts. 
Jeonghan's got some poor new soul to flirt with again and Seokmin looks like he'd rather be at home watching cooking videos. Vernon is wearing headphones of all things while Seungcheol has a shit-eating grin on his handsome face. And you instinctively know Mingyu has to be up to no good because you don't see or hear him.
Not that you're actually paying that much attention to the same-old-same people, focus naturally drawn to the tall man standing next to Wonwoo. Light brown hair curls just beneath his ears, shaggy enough that the urge to run your fingers through and imagine what the tug of strands between them might feel like consumes you. It comes as a shock, considering that Jeonghan's had the same style before and you've never felt like this.
You drink in the baby blue shirt that compliments the mystery man's skin tone, top buttons left undone to showcase the delicate silver around his throat and framed by collar bones. The fabric's elegance belies the strength of the body it clothes, material straining tastefully in the tiniest bit over a broad chest and wide shoulders. Sleeves rolled up to accentuate the flex of his forearm down to the long, long fingers wrapped all the way around the glass of alcohol held between them.
"That's Joshua Hong," Seungkwan supplies helpfully though he can't hide how smug he sounds observing you and shares a knowing look with Vernon who snickers.
"Joshua Hong," you repeat and enjoy how easy his name sounds and feels coming off your tongue. "Is that so?"
"Yeah and to my knowledge, he's extremely single."
"Don't tell me that's how you introduce me to other people."
He feigns innocence. "Can't recall but even if I did, bet it's going to work in your favor. Don't look now but it seems like you've caught a big fish."
Of course, when someone tells you not to look, the first thing you'd logically do is look. Glad you weren't caught staring earlier now that the very same man you were drooling over has noticed your existence and is staring directly at you. 
Brown irises drop down to scan your figure and the suggestiveness of it lights something deep within you. You're quick to nudge off Seungkwan's arm around your waist when Joshua's eyes linger a second longer on it than you'd expect, ignoring your friend's sassy mutter of "hook, line, and sinker."
"I… I really don't like that implication, 'Kwan."
"Sure you don't."
Joshua Hong's intent gaze is far from unsavory. Even if it was more perverse in nature, you think you'd feel drunk off the same amount of power it fills you with and you haven't had a single drop of alcohol yet. A swear word escapes under your breath at the dampness of your back — and elsewhere — before sending the admiring man a demure smile of acknowledgement and turning once more to Seungkwan.
"You were criticizing my shoes earlier?"
"'Cause you can barely walk in them!"
"Then let's put these bad boys to good use."
Your friend can only shake his head as you stride away. He'll keep an occasional eye on you from afar for the rest of the night but he has a hunch things will be… fine. He hopes. Wonwoo did say Joshua was a decent man, after all.
He'll have to be… if he's willing to put up with you, Seungkwan thinks to himself with a cringe as he watches. 
Vernon hands over a much appreciated beer and he sidles up to the unbothered man's side, jutting his chin out in your direction and asking, "Are you ready for some entertainment?"
"Yo, always bro."
"Cheers to that."
Meanwhile, you've made it to the new company without stumbling once — something you're very proud of. You nod at Joshua. Nothing more than a soft flutter of eyelashes, alerting him that you're aware of his presence but indulging in nothing more. Instead, you choose to lean comfortably into his companion's space.
"Hi Woo, care to share?"
The bespectacled man wordlessly offers his nearly empty glass of wine, always easygoing and ever perceptive. Unlike his best friend who never fails to be endearing but can't take a hint to save his life. One of the many reasons why Mingyu has never succeeded as a wingman —  unfathomably clumsy but still loveable in all aspects to steal everyone's heart involved.
You finish the rest of Wonwoo's drink off with a satisfied hiss at the taste but not without a snort. "I didn't mean that, silly."
He cracks a smile, returning the teasing with a fake, reproaching scold of your name. "Could've told me you wanted to steal my buddy and not drain all my alcohol!"
Joshua laughs — loud and clear above the din of noises surrounding you. It has an air of gracefulness to it and you're sure the club brightens in a way that's totally not from the strobe lights going crazy.
"So, this is Seungkwan's friend…"
You jab Wonwoo's side with a huff. "Hey, I'm much more than that!"
"If it's any consolation," Joshua cuts in with another laugh and a handshake, taking on a self introduction. "I'm just some guy named Joshua. Hope that doesn't disappoint."
"Just some guy, huh? One that wears a Royal Oak?" 
He thrillingly doesn't let go of your hand, keeping a firm but gentle grasp when turning it with his to properly glance at the notorious status symbol wrapped around it. The steel casing glints just as fiercely as the sapphire glass over white gold hour-markers embedded on its face. 
"Yep, still just some guy that's called Josh. Joshua Hong, to be exact. Scared you off yet?" 
"I wear heels that have a one hundred percent chance of breaking my ankle to a place where there's a terrible combo of dancing and drinks. But you think I'd be scared by a pretty boy wearing thirty-some jewels around his wrist?"
He steals another appreciative look up and down your body. Not as fiery as the first one but still bold without shame, striking another bolt of heat that flashes through your veins and simmers in your lower abdomen. 
"Taste. And bite. I'd expect nothing less from someone like you."
"Someone like me?" you scoff as he winks, taking a step back and extending your arm as far as it will go with the notion for you to follow.
"Dance with me?"
Wonwoo had quietly faded into the background and slipped away for another refill. Smart guy. There's no one to worry about leaving behind when you accept this unfamiliar man's invitation and let him whisk you in the direction of the dancefloor. But not before catching Seungkwan's mild and supportive yet watchful gaze before he raises his beer in a mock salute.
It's almost cute at how inept Joshua is maneuvering through the tumultuous flow and ebb of moving bodies compared to said good friend. The way his taller frame looks more like a poor cruise ship tossed helplessly in the waves of the ocean than the stationary lighthouse and its reassuring beacon you'd expect causes a chuckle.
"You're almost as bad at this as I am."
He shoots an apologetic smile at the same time someone once again jostles his shoulder, pushing him closer into you. "Nightclubs really aren't my scene."
You're not complaining about the aided proximity that lets you hear what he says without strain. Although you do try to match the beat as it changes to something more sensual yet still playful. Going along with the rhythm of the other dancers rather than against much smoother than Joshua's awkward attempt to mimic. He sticks behind you, failing to hide the blatant mesmerization at how you sway effortlessly to the beat.
"You're not bad at this at all."
You shrug. "I've been here often enough to blend in better than most. So tell me, what's a rich boy's usual scene then? Shanqin Bay's clubhouse?"
"Hah, you wanna come with me sometime and find out?"
"Only if you can promise a fun experience… oh," you throw a smirk at him over your shoulder, "and to cover all the costs, of course."
"A pretty thing like you would have anyone saying yes and wrapped around your little finger." 
"Maybe, but only if they're worth my attention."
"Afraid to disappoint yet again when I spend most hours of the day in the operating room."
You turn abruptly to face him, grateful for the hand that shoots out to support your elbow despite his surprise at your dubious side-eye. "Are you a doctor?"
"Maybe."
"Director's son?"
"Cliché enough for you yet?"
"I recall someone who's wearing a Royal Oak saying I had good taste so I'm not going to complain. Though it would have been quite the story to hear you were the one under the knife," you take a step closer and slip a finger underneath his silver chain to tempt him closer, "to end up looking this good." When large hands hesitate to land on your hips, you raise an eyebrow. "Thought a surgeon would have a steadier grip."
"Oh." Brown eyes flicker with a carnal desire, focusing on your lips. "You expect me to be a rich, talented playboy and not be naturally handsome too?" 
"Sorry, Doctor Hong but there has to be at least something wrong with you."
The polite smile he'd been wearing all night quirks up at the corners, changing into something more on edge. A little dangerous. Beckoning excitement. He spins you back around, hands solidly landing on your sides — this time without reserve — to prevent your lower bodies from touching and changes the subject back to when you approached Wonwoo and him.
"Do you always take drinks from guys?"
"Ah, hm. Just the good ones."
"Good alcohol?" His breath is hot against the ear he's speaking directly into. "Or… good boys?"
Biting your lower lip does nothing to hide the unfettered glee you're feeling. "Alcohol, of course." A breathy sigh and you take the leap. "Want a taste?"
There's no need to ask twice. It's like the right key turning its lock. The doctor's initial awkward movements are nowhere to be found as one hand smoothly leaves your hip, turning your chin toward him to meet you halfway with his lips ready to brush against yours. 
At the last minute, he backs off and turns your chin to its original position of facing forward with a smirk you can't see. Who cares about a missed kiss when his other hand slides across your stomach? Urging you to press your ass backwards and grind against the very obvious bulge that his khakis do nothing to hide.
Its growing hardness and promising length cause you to automatically moan, arching your back with the feral need to feel more. Your head tilts to the side, hips swiveling and swaying not to the beat but the rise of his cock. The position willingly grants Joshua access to lick, suck, and bite at the exposed skin. 
He hums along to the music with a melodic voice from what you can hear, though you find more enjoyment in the consistent vibrations against your neck. A naughty hand plays with the tucked-in hem of your blouse and an occasional finger teasingly slips under the waistline of your jeans.
You can now feel Joshua's smirk when in turn, your fingers tangle in the bottom hairs of his mullet. His lips curl up, moving to nibble behind your other ear and breathe in your scent. As delightfully predicted, there's a distinct pull by your rings when you tug them free from the strands that has him pausing. Eliciting a sharp hiss and equally as sharp — but appreciative — thrust against your backside. 
In retaliation, the lax hand caressing your throat tightens around it ever so slightly while he growls in your ear, "You said there has to be something wrong with me, right?"
"Mhm, oh yeah. Totally."
"Wanna fuck around and find out, beautiful?"
Hook, line, and sinker was damn right, Boo Seungkwan. Of course, the devil would be wearing a shirt the same shade as the sky where heaven's clouds make their home.
And you eagerly take the forbidden fruit — his hand, once again — and teeter after him. The red flags are already starting to fly at full mast but into the dimly lit hallway you go, elated to find an empty and quiet corner right before the stairs leading down to the bathrooms.
Underneath the neon glow of the exit sign, Joshua pins you against the wall with your arms laying on his shoulders. If you thought the attacks from his mouth were rough on the dance floor, they turn ten times more animalistic now that he has something to support you with other than strong arms and big hands. A pair of soft lips and the warm wet tongue between them contrast with the digging in of his teeth that follow your necklace chain to its adorning pendant. 
It hangs in the v-neck window of your blouse and he lets out a tiny grunt of displeasure at the breasts being concealed away by the fabric and its many buttons. That doesn't stop him from tugging the bottom of the shirt free like a petulant child, nothing preventing his fingers now free to tickle and feel up the bare skin beneath. 
This man is good at distraction. You don't think much of the light grazing beneath your tits, only a fleeting and casual touch. It feels so good when he cups under them like an additional support for the bra you're wearing and squeezes, causing you to keen and push yourself further into him. Then quick as lightning, one hand sneaks around the back to unhook the bra's clasp and the other deftly unbuttons your jeans.
"Joshua!" you squeak in protest, stepping back and pressing flat against the wall. You're quick to rush and slap a hand against your chest to keep the beloved strapless bra that's served you well from falling to the ground. "Is your red flag undressing someone in public?"
"Only if you insist 'cause surely I would never decline such a request being the gentleman that I am." The doctor makes no further move despite the way he licks his lips and teases, only chuckling at the menacing way you squint. "Just know my full intentions are to be touching all over and especially under whatever layers you're wearing very shortly."
There's no use hiding the whine that escapes when he places a hand on the wall next to you and leans in with a smirk.
"However, sweetheart… " 
You catch his line of sight dart off to the left and your heart plummets, the fear of being left high and dry (wet) setting in. "Josh — "
"You'll have to forgive this rich boy's schemes. You see, I've always been very spoiled and just have to take what I want right away. And you're much too irresistible…" 
He speaks casually. Like your jeans weren't suddenly unzippered and he isn't currently running a tantalizing finger on the fabric below the waistband of your panties, causing them to soaken further down. Way more than they already had and almost where you need him but also not even close in the slightest. 
"Though as a rich boy," he continues, "I'm more than familiar with providing a small courtesy here and there. Would this club's filthy bathroom offer enough privacy for you, gorgeous?"
"… Only if you make sure I'm presentable enough to get down there… and back up here after, for when I have to leave with my friends."
Joshua's eyes widen before he's throwing his head back and laughing, bright and cheery like he's not going to rearrange your guts. "So you don't expect to go home with me? Maybe I won't be such a walking red flag to you."
"Doubtful. Now fix me up, Doctor." 
"With pleasure." 
It's not like there are as many people milling about as in the main area. Still, it's good to be conscientious. The same adept hands re-fasten your top undergarment efficiently. When he ducks his head to kindly fix your pants — which is sort of hot — you take the opportunity to whisper in his ear for shit-and-giggles to gauge his reaction.
"You know there's a front clasp too."
He glances up from where he's eye-level with your covered breasts, eyes darkening. Bingo. 
"What a little whore we have here, hm?"
The nonchalant, degrading question and burning desire in his gaze makes your knees weaken, arousal skyrocketing. Enough that you almost throw all caution to the wind for him to fuck you. Right here, right now. But then he's pulling away, offering a palm you can't seem to refrain from taking a hold of. And ever the true picture of being a gentleman — helps you descend down the dark stairwell.
Your killer heels really do nothing for you physically (besides the threat of rolling an ankle) because it doesn't matter how tall or short you end up with them on. It's the confidence and ego that are heightened exponentially, which is all that matters. 
That's why you follow Joshua Hong into the sketchy bathroom, let him lock the door, and bat your eyelashes with a coy smile. Leaning against the sink and fussing with your blouse as he approaches like a predator eyeing up its prey. Greedily drinking in the bare skin revealed by each button that's undone until only one is still fastened — right across your tits — that the man can unclasp himself if he so chooses.
Barely anything stopped him before anyways.
And that's what also fuels you to put your arms around his neck, pressing your bodies close together. Even closer by hooking your right leg across his hip, the point of your heel digging intentionally into the back of his other thigh. It's hot and hard — the dick bulge that keeps growing pressed tightly into the snug warmth of your core — and Joshua lets you grind down and dampen his khakis for a few moments longer than expected.
"Desperate, aren't you? Didn't wanna fuck in public 'cause you're freakier behind closed doors?"
"Just a little." You fight back the urge to whimper or admit anything to him. Like you aren't humping his length that only swells more and feels achingly thicker the harder you rut against it, eyelids fluttering the few times it's able to deliciously spread your pussy lips just the slightest through your clothes. "I'm so wet — "
"The more of a mess you leave on my pants, the longer I'll have to edge you while waiting for them to dry." Joshua grins cockily at you trying to force your hips to stop themselves only to struggle pathetically in vain. "Think you'd like that. Haven't even gotten to fuck this hot little cunt yet and I'm already certain I wouldn't mind being buried in there for hours. But don't know if your friends will stick around for that long…"
"J-Josh, ah — Shua… mhm!"
"So I think you'd better behave if you know what's good for you," he stills your hips hard, "fuckin' slut."
You mewl at the hard, rude thrust that bumps your clit as if he was actually fucking you. Like goo, you let him manhandle you around so you're bent over and facing the smudged mirror, hands gripping tightly to each side of the sink basin. Aided by the reflections, you witness how he shamelessly ogles the tempting ass that's been rubbing all over him all night. And of course that means you have to perk up and wiggle your hips, giving him quite a show.
The small distance between you clears the lust cloud and you throw a smoldering glance over your shoulder. "If you fuck me with my heels on, I'll give you a chance with them off."
Joshua swats your ass — not very hard but you release a yelp of surprise. "Wasn't aware that you were running the show, sweetheart."
"It's my backside you're looking at."
"Knew you were mouthy the minute I saw you. You're aware of how kind I am, so let me give you a choice." He's anything but kind as he sighs and leans his weight over top of you. Despite the bracing strength of his arms, you feel suffocated by just being caged in between them and the overpowering scent of his cologne. "I shut you up with either my fingers in your mouth or around your throat."
Oh… decisions, decisions! Long fingers that would surely feel best deep inside your pussy but that wasn't one of the options. You purse your lips in thought and arch up, balancing the heavy cock supported by your ass and unconsciously pouting. Joshua has the audacity to look at the time while brushing back his hair and clicks his tongue.
"Wow, I'm letting you choose between sucking on my fingers like a slut or being choked like a whore and you still can't decide? What a high maintenance toy."
The urge to scoff is extremely strong. "Sucking it is then, Doctor Hong," you say sweetly and then add with a sneer, "like the perfect slut that I truly am."
"When your friends all said you were nothing but a gentle soul, I knew they were duped. Only one was partially truthful in saying you could be sassy which doesn't even come close. Little do they know there's a bratty cockwhore with quite a bite underneath all that charm."
"Haven't fucked any of them, that's why. No plans to either."
"Yeah, what was it you like — oh right, good boys?" He laughs — low, mean, and degrading. "Then what am I, sweetheart?"
"A doctor who's full of himself and needs taken down a few, ha, pegs."
"Ah, there it is." Joshua undoes the final button, slipping a curious finger beneath the bra's front hook pulling your tits together. You shiver when it snaps against your skin after he retracts, pointer finger tracing a lazy line up your throat to its final destination. "The attitude."
You willingly part your lips, lolling your tongue out mischievously to match the roll of your eyes. "Someone gets off on it."
"Is that so?" He smears the lipgloss on your lower lip by pulling it down before releasing it. "Do you think this is all a coincidence, darling?" Meeting the hardened gaze in the mirror, you shake your head. "The minute I saw such a sparkling gem on Wonwoo's story, I just had to have it for myself."
It's not hard to guess what he's referring to. A couple weeks ago, you wore enough scraps of fabric to just cover your nipples and the areas between your legs. Drinking far too much and hanging off of the WonGyu duo's broad frames while the whole gang partied it up together at Vernon's. You had even asked them to send you the videos and pictures after because damn, you did look hot as fuck.
Who knew it would be bait for an entitled pretty boy? 
"At least you waited to find me when I wasn't drunk."
"Much more fun to break someone sober."
"Glad to know consensual exists in your vocabulary."
"How about it — will you let me destroy this little pussy of yours and ruin it to keep you crawling back to me for more?"
"Sure, if you ever stop talking and actually do something — "
Joshua's quick to shut you up, almost cracking your jaw with the harsh thumb that's jammed in the corner of your mouth to prop it open. The following two fingers are thrust cruelly inside as a replacement so it can move to keep your chin steady. They're able to reach so far when pinning down your tongue, ending up wedged near the back of your throat so you're already gagging around them. 
"Most sluts behave the second I drop the nice guy act. But boy oh boy, it only makes you act up more, eh?" 
He finally does away with your bra to allow those gorgeous tits to spill out and casually rips the garment from your body like it's personally offended him. Maybe it has. Shoving it away into his back pocket and then urgently tugging your jeans down. The binding position you're left in helps keep your shaky legs in place while you cling to the sink like it's a lifeline. Upper body supported only by the cruel hold he has on your face until he yanks it back so you're flush against him instead, the cool baby-blue silk of his shirt set ablaze by your shared body heat. 
"Next time, wear something that has easier access. Or better yet… maybe nothing at all or I'll be forced to rip it off." A piercing set of eyes attempt to glare into yours that roll back delightfully despite what's likely some snark ends up sounding all jumbled. "Oh yes, there will be a next time, sweetheart. I have to train this cunt to yearn for my cock — and you don't think you'll get it that easily, right?"
Joshua chuckles darkly knowing you can't reply. But liking to be full of surprises, you relax your upper jaw while his fingers trail across your pelvis and close your lips around the ones in your mouth. Suckling and swirling once the tension in them relaxes despite the naughty thought of biting. That doesn't eliminate the occasional graze of your teeth as a threat, responding to his words in your own way.
"Just look at yourself, slobbering all over… bet you suck cock like a champ. And prolly like it real messy. How well-trained you'd look trying to balance on these pointed heels while I fuck that bratty mouth."
You moan at the visual he's painted in your head. 
"That's right, darling." There's a mean pinch to your clit followed by the man's groan at the ruined fabric squelching between his fingertips and how the covered little nub was already begging for friction. "Now tell me how long your cunt's been warming up and soaking these drenched panties?"
"Since the beginning…" you admit once he's freed your sore mouth and chooses to bully your breasts next. "When you looked at me."
He snickers, pushing your underwear to the side and petting at the bare slippery folds. Just able to barely see a small glimpse of where his actions play with your lower body in the mirror. At least your expressions make up for what he misses seeing.
"Aw, this soft pussy started drooling the minute I laid eyes on you? While I was imagining all the things I could do to these tits," the hand on one of them palms at the rounded flesh hard. "This ass," his pelvis grinds in a slow circle against it. "Mhm, and of course, this hidden gem." 
At that, a thumb brutally rubs at your clit while plunging a finger inside the warm, wet walls that eagerly pulse around it. You weren't wrong about how good the digit would feel inside, the length and stretch of its bony knuckle feeling good enough to substitute as a mini-dick when Joshua starts a slow and methodical pace with it.
"Thought about having you spread out in the backseat of my Bugatti La Voiture Noire, you'd look like a vision laying across its leather seats. And the best thing? No one can see inside so you'll get your much desired privacy while being right out in the open."
Then he's adding another finger, longer than the first. And finally one more with an additional push in and out of the others. Clearly his experience on how to work a pussy is more than helpful. Alternating between stuffing your hole full of all three or changing up the pace and number each turn. 
And of course, your chest is attended to as well. Both nipples tugged in iterations to match the rhythm of each finger spearing into your cunt, the pendant of your necklace bouncing in time. Without fail, he hits the bundle of nerves with a deadly precision that has you going slack against him.
"Maybe we should do that 'cause," he mumbles in your ear, "this filthy hole is awfully good at convincing me to spoil its owner like no one else. Let's see if it can tell me how much it'll want me to fill it up one day."
Your ears ring with the devastating screams of white noise at the sudden stop. The moans you were letting out trail off into a dissatisfied growl. His hand falls away from your upper body while the one in between your legs merely sits nice and snug, still inside but not moving. Far too relaxed, limp even.
"Joshua!"
"C'mon, weren't you listening? Convince me."
"Fuck you," is what you spit out, glaring at the challenging and impossibly smug reflection of the menace behind you. 
"You didn't say fuck off, so… I'm waiting." 
Another check at his watch like he's bored infuriates you enough to move your hips. Whining at how his fingers fail to stiffen and only follow your pitiful motions back and forth. Out of protest, you reach behind and take a harsh hold of the hard length you're able to grab.
"Watch it, darling!" Joshua flinches and the way his cock twitches dulls the venomous words that come next. "Or I'll leave you here all needy and by yourself, waiting for some other pathetic dick to hop onto in order to satiate just a little bit of this wet and slutty pussy's behaviors."
Well, that idea doesn't appeal to you whatsoever so you lean on the sink with a huff to do what needs done. It's a struggle to stay balanced on your heels while grabbing at his wrist but a small part of you knows he won't let you fall, a bicep supporting under your breasts. Revenge comes sweetly by digging your nails into the tense muscle of his forearm and leaving scratch marks that have him hissing.
And now you know for sure —  despite the doctor's incredibly huge ego and big talk, Joshua Hong's no better than a painslut.
"Hah," you breathe out and start to slowly rock your hips. "Disrespectfully, go to hell."
Ignoring the abrasive insult — because he's a demon anyways — Joshua focuses on the wet suctioning sound growing louder the faster you move. The feeling of your tits and necklace hitting his arm to the beat of your hip bounces and enjoying the view of how his fingers disappear beyond the jiggle of your asscheeks. Up into the tight heat of velvety walls as you force his hand to behave and serve your needs like one of your dildos, though they've never been this uncooperative.
"That's it. Yeah, there we go… just like that. Go ahead and make yourself cum riding my fingers, beautiful. Uh-huh, now who's using me like a little whore to get off?"
You're already losing yourself. Waiting for that rising wave to crest because despite his annoying mouth, Joshua's fingers are more than skilled enough to hurl you into a delightful climax. As long as nothing interrupts it.
"Answer me — or I'll make you choke yourself."
"Mhm…"
He likes seeing how your face contorts, moans getting louder. It's too addicting which is why he growls out, "Do it." 
It's a feat to let go of the sink but the reward is to move his arm around your bra-line to your throat, making his hand envelope it. The visual in the mirror is depraved — limbs all wrapped and tangled with each other — and your half-closed eyes taunt the searing gaze in the mirror, repeating his words right back. 
"Why not do it yourself, Doctor?"
"Are you some sort of succubus or what?" He spits out the question like it's the germs on the toilet seat next to you. Freeing himself momentarily from the grip of your hand and your cunt, the man's at least nice enough to assuage the pissed off whine with a consoling lick up your neck and tugs impatiently at your pants. "Take these off."
"Go fuck yourself," you mutter darkly with half the mind to walk out of there. But you do as he says, quickly shimmying them off while your clit buzzes and twitches angrily at the neglect of stimulation again. 
Joshua's eyes don't look away, his hands steadying your hips and your pussy aching when you hear how he slowly slurps on his fingers to clean them. Once you step back into your heels, he throws the jeans over his shoulder. 
"Careful with the phone," you threaten. 
Joshua snorts and bends over to secure a strap for you — sucking harshly on the skin of your thigh as a "you're welcome" but pulling away before your hands can tangle in his hair and keep him down there. 
"Wrong thing to say to someone who likes broken and expensive things. Shouldn't you be warning me not to break something else?" Suddenly, your other shoe dangles precariously off your foot when he uses a strong hand to lift and support your leg onto the sink's surface. "Like this poor pussy?" 
The straining burn in your muscles and the added chill of the porcelain is all alleviated by harsh rubbing at the tender skin of your entrance. Middle and pointer finger eagerly prying sloppy pussy lips apart once again.
"Ah, but I might enjoy that." 
A clear glob of arousal drips from your hole fluttering and clenching around nothing. Joshua leers hungrily past your shoulder at the mirror's erotic display of your exposed cunt and the wetness shining under the buzz of the bathroom's fluorescent lights.
"Dirty and yet it's such a pretty little jewel. Sparkling and glistening so, so lovely that I can't wait to watch it shatter while playing with it."
Finally, all three fingers from before work in tandem to scissor repeatedly inside of your tight warmth without forgiveness. This time, the devil has nothing but good intentions to send you over the peak of pleasure. His eyes can't stop feasting on the raunchy way your greedy hole gobbles up his fingers. The loud squelches accompanying his motions echo around the small enclosed space, mixing with the warm breath hitting the side of his cheek from your gasping moans.
Joshua thinks it's mighty cute how puffy your outer pussy lips grow and struggle to spread around the thick and long digits shoved inside plus the onslaught of his thumb bullying your clit. The angle shows the slightest bulge of them relentlessly stroking the bundle of nerves that has your leg twitching from the sheer pleasure.
He focuses on bringing you there, all on what you're feeling rather than his own pleasure because you have the most convincing cunt ever that deserves to be ravaged by a large, girthy cock. A shame it has to wait because he cannot give in so easily. But you're definitely a piece of work. Joshua likes that. 
"Gonna keep making a mess on my fingers, darling? Leave 'em all sweet and wet enough for me to wrap around my dick later and pretend it's your pussy instead."
You'll be the death of him when your head rolls into the crease of his neck, drool dampening the skin as you mouth senselessly at the vein protruding beneath. There's a sharp sting — the certain kind he hasn't felt in a very long time. A telltale warning of a hickey, the beautiful colors of red and purple already rushing to the surface and decorated by little nips of your teeth after you soothe the pain with your tongue.
No one marks up Joshua Hong. Sure, he's had lipstick stains before but those can easily be swiped off with a handkerchief and washed away in the shower. He can't help but smirk though, knowing when he eventually wipes your sticky lipgloss off, something of you will remain for a bit.
However you can't go without a little punishment. If you can even call it that when he returns to wrapping a hand around your throat. Anyone else who dared to leave a mark would be walked away from. But you — you simply lose enough oxygen causing your head to spin more pleasantly than it already is. 
And you claw at his forearm, scratching it up ten times more to serve as a further reminder for Joshua to look at. You're by no means urging him to stop but to earnestly keep going while simultaneously searching for something — anything — to anchor you down as you float into an almost unconscious state of pure ecstasy. 
It's by far the strongest, most intense orgasm you'd ever experienced. Becoming nothing but a bag of bones in his arms as your walls pulsate around his fingers and the fruitful expenditure of your release drips down his wrist.
He stays in that position, unable to move anyways with the vice-like grip of your spasming cunt cramping his fingers. Instead, drawing out the pleasure as much as possible by squeezing and releasing the pressure on your throat over and over again. The true picture of debauchery — heaven and sin mixed in one — and he kind of wishes for a third arm to take a photo for a keepsake. 
Everything in your body aches deliciously. You feel both refreshed and exhausted when you finally come to and even then Joshua supports your weak body as you try to regain control over your wits and whereabouts.
"Pants," you croak out and wave him off when he tries to gentlemanly assist. Which he still kind of has to when you almost topple face-first on legs that feel like jelly. "Bra." 
Joshua's a little less enthusiastic to hand that over, bitter sarcasm lacing his words. "Wow, won't even grant me a souvenir?"
"Boo-hoo," you gripe back and pretend not to notice the eyes glued to the way your tits bounce when adjusting the garment around them. Turning to look in the mirror, you work on dulling the "just got fingered in the bathroom" appearance. "It's not like you need one and it seems even less likely you'll keep anything from a stranger, especially lingerie."
"Hm, I like how well you read me."
"Of course you do, fuels that large privileged ego. Don't get used to it. But, want me to do something about that one though?"
He coughs at the rather suggestive insult, shifting his pants and shirt that does absolutely nothing to hide the messy boner you're referencing. "Guess I did a great job if you're begging for it already."
"Oh, for goodness sake I'm being courteous."
"Cute." 
Joshua admits it almost like he's startled by the words that escape his mouth. Further surprising both of you with a clumsy, sloppy kiss to the cheek when he leans over to fasten the top button of your blouse. As if embarrassed, he's already halfway out the door when he remembers to mention, "I'll be thinking of you darling, look forward to your call!"
You're left staring at the saliva spot reflected on your cheek in shock. And then, you wipe it off with the rest of the accumulated sweat to make yourself a bit more presentable and then head back to the club as naturally as possible.
Dr. Hong is seemingly nowhere in sight as expected. You figure it would be hard to return with a raging boner despite the low lighting and he probably left through the back exit to likely jerk off in his ridiculously expensive car. The visual of white ropes of cum streaming past the steel band of the Royal Oak around his wrist haunts your mind, making your aching core buzz to life again and your sticky panties even grosser.
Out of pure spite, you hope he stains his shirt too. 
Luckily, Seungkwan is still at the bar when you wobble over in search of him. He shouts your name in mock shock, assessing your appearance with pursed lips and eyeballing your figure dubiously. 
"You look like hell."
"Yeah?" you laugh it off as nonchalantly as possible, unaware of the phone in your back pocket lighting up with a returned text message from a newly saved number and a scandalous picture attached. "I just got back."
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onlyseokmins: July 2023 ©
771 notes · View notes
mercurygguk · 1 year
Text
if it’s not you · kth (m)
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↳ summary; Kim Taehyung grew up watching his parents fall more in love for each day that passed and he always longed for that great, passionate love himself. But if it’s not you? Then he doesn’t want it.
pairing; taehyung x f. reader
word count; 8,582
rating; 18+
content; exes to lovers!au, smut/angst, a bit of fluff
warnings; making out, dirty talk, nipple play, oral sex (f. receiving), hand job, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, cream pie, possessive/jealous and slightly insecure taetae <3
chapters. part one | part two
↳ listen to the playlist here.
author’s note; it’s here!!!! the taehyung fic i’ve been wanting to write for SO long ughhhdjsk i really hope you like it and that you enjoy it despite all the hurt and angst heh – please let me know what you think! comment, reblog, send me an ask – whatever you feel most comfortable with!! everything is greatly appreciated <3 thank you sm for reading muah
ps. a big thank you to @kookingtae​ once again for beta-ing for me and for helping me brainstorm for the smut scene <33 ur the best ily thank you for your support and help!
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Kim Taehyung is not sad.
Sadness is not what he feels when he goes out with his friends and spots two people all over each other, happy and in love. Sadness is not what he feels when he sits at home, watching a movie by himself. Sadness is not what he feels when his friends tell him they’re engaged and are having an engagement party to celebrate.
No, Kim Taehyung is way past sadness. 
If anything, what he feels is most likely something more akin to a feeling called ‘I don��t care anymore’... a certain, unexplainable emptiness. He doesn’t care that everyone around him is falling in love and getting engaged, he doesn’t care if two strangers are all over each other when he’s at a bar. He doesn’t care that all of his one-night-stands give him a nasty look when he tells them to leave in the middle of the night after having emotionless – I don’t care who you are or what your name is – sex with them.
Taehyung just doesn't care anymore. Or that’s what he thought, at least.
He thought that he wouldn’t give two shits when he saw you walk through the door, arriving at the engagement party his friends are currently throwing. He also thought that he wouldn’t care that some unknown guy was trailing right behind you, his hand tightly wrapped around yours.
But Taehyung should’ve known better. 
He should’ve known his mind would play tricks on him and pull up flashbacks to the day he lost all belief in love.
Two years ago…
“Kiss me,” he pleaded, voice barely above a whisper as he spoke. He begged you, the unsteady tone of his voice giving away that he was on the brink of breaking down if you didn’t connect your lips with his within the next few seconds. He was desperate, breathing heavily as he tried his best to keep the tears from welling in his eyes.
The last few weeks had been absolute hell. The apartment has been empty beyond measure, most of your stuff gone by now. You haven’t been in the apartment since the day you left and the only reason you were back tonight was because you forgot a few things. Taehyung knew you’d come, you had texted him to let him know just so that you wouldn’t be barging in on him at a random hour. One thing he didn’t realize though when you texted him was how much he genuinely hated all of this until you stood in front of him with a small, sad-looking smile on your face.
How you ended up in the bedroom, cuddling and now almost kissing, was unbeknownst to him and you as well. Taehyung had been sitting on the edge of the bed, watching as you packed your remaining things in utter silence. When you were finished and wanted to give him one last goodbye hug, he had made the first move to urge you onto the bed with him. It’s not that he had bad intentions with it. He just needed to hold you one last time before you’d move on for good. Cuddles then turned into him pulling you on top of him to straddle his waist, begging and pleading for you to kiss him.
“Taehyung…” You softly let his name fall from your lips in a sigh as you looked down at him from your straddling position on top of him, “we shouldn’t-”
“Please, ____,” he tried again with pain laced in his words, sitting up with you still perched on his lap, “please, just kiss me.”
[end of flashback]
Two years since he last saw you and talked to you. Two years of losing every ounce of belief he had in ‘the great love’ of life. Why continue to look for love when he already had the love of his life and lost her?
In Taehyung’s head, there was no reason to look for love when the person he loved more than life itself left him with only half a heart to live by two years ago. Even if he wanted to find another great love, it simply wouldn’t be possible. He lives with only half of his heart and you can’t love someone with just half a heart.
Not when someone else has the other half.
“Hey, isn’t that ____?”
Taehyung is pulled from his thoughts by Jimin, his best friend since high school and the only person who would be able to recognize his ex-girlfriend from miles away – even after two years have gone by.
“Yep,” Taehyung curtly replies and brings his drink to his lips, taking a long sip. The heavy, dark taste of whiskey burns his throat on the way down but he welcomes it, suddenly in desperate need of feeling something that isn’t the tug on the strings of his half heart.
Jimin’s face scrunches up in confusion, “who’s the guy?”
I don’t know, Jimin. Does it look like I’ve stayed in touch with her since she walked out on me? Do you think she’d be across the room, in another man’s embrace, if I had stayed in touch with her?
Instead of saying that, Taehyung shrugs ‘carelessly’ and takes another sip of his drink, eyes following you as you and your date move towards the newly-engaged couple. 
He can’t take his eyes off you.
You look so different and yet the exact same. 
Every move of your body and expression on your face twist in the most beautiful, hypnotizing way as always. Your hair is shorter, he notices, but it suits you. You’re glowing from across the room and your smile lights up the entire apartment when you throw your head back in laughter.
It travels across the room and reaches Taehyung’s ears, cutting straight through the music flowing from the stereo. The pretty sound causes his chest to fill with a familiar warmth. Except this time it isn’t him who’s on the receiving end of your smile and gentle touch; your date is. As much as it bothers him, Taehyung can’t stop watching you as you talk with the hosts, wishing them congratulations on their engagement, and handing them the gift you brought along. And then you introduce the man next to you, a bright smile on your face as you watch them shake hands. 
Something vile rises within Taehyung at the sight. He knows he has no right to feel like this but something about the way you’re introducing this random guy to you and Taehyung’s shared friends doesn’t sit right with him. It used to be you and him, attending every get-together together. You always arrived hand in hand, all smiles and good vibes because nothing could stop the two of you from touching each other, from being attached at all times – from being in love.
“Jia didn’t mention anything about a new boyfriend,” Jimin mutters from next to Taehyung. The annoyed glare he shoots at his best friend causes Jimin to shrug innocently, “I mean – I think, of all people, she would know if ____ was seeing someone.”
Jia is a shared friend between you and Jimin. While Jia is one of your best friends, Jia and Jimin are more than friends but not quite enough to be considered a couple. They will get there eventually – Jimin just needs to get his head out of his own ass and ask the poor girl on a date instead of only showing up at her doorstep for some fun in bed. Jia is waiting patiently for him to make the next move but Jimin isn’t that smart when it comes to serious relationships.
“Don’t you have something else to do rather than talking my ear off about my ex and her date?”
The bitterness on Taehyung’s tongue feels odd but he can’t help it. He hasn’t seen you once in two years after you left that night and now you’re here, looking beautiful as ever with another man by your side. 
Jealousy has never been something Taehyung cared much for. He never had a reason to but as you let your date wrap an arm around your waist to pull you closer, the jealousy washes away every rational thought he’s had since he saw you walk through the door.
Jimin mumbles something under his breath before he disappears from Taehyung’s side, leaving him to stand there while rolling the glass of whiskey in his hand, dark and glaring eyes shooting daggers at the man you brought along tonight.
However, it seems his glare from across the room also grazes you as you turn your head to look around. Taehyung’s breath hitches in his throat when your eyes meet his and he can tell you let out a gasp once you realize just who exactly you’re locking eyes with. Your date asks you if something’s wrong and you shake your head in response, telling him it’s nothing.
Taehyung’s body heats up with a familiar tingling feeling that feels all too normal and yet it’s a strange sensation. He hasn’t felt what he just felt in two years, the different women he’s slept with or been out with have never once caused warmth and excitement to spread through his entire body as the ones he just felt. Not a single woman has managed to trigger Taehyung’s interest in more than just a one-night-stand.
But, of course, it’s you.
Who else would light a fire in his soul but the same woman who blew it out a few years ago?
The irony almost makes Taehyung huff out an unimpressed chuckle. He fights it and pushes it back but it's no use as you decide to raise your hand and give him a small wave, a hesitant smile on your lips as you do. Taehyung lets the chuckle leave him, shaking his head in disbelief, watching your smile falter into a soft frown.
You left him.
You walked out of the door two years ago and dropped off earth’s surface until tonight. Taehyung only knew you were alive and well thanks to social media and your circle of shared friends, not that it was much help. His so-called friends weren't very cooperative every time he’d ask about you. Especially when he would visit Jimin and Jia would be there – that woman kept all the news about you behind locked lips whenever Taehyung was around.
So, when it really comes down to it, Taehyung has no idea what you've been doing for two years. All he knows is that you went overseas to live and work there, making the distance between you and him bigger than he’d expected when he watched you walk out of the home you once shared. Taehyung doesn’t understand why you bolted out of the country as soon as you could – what you went looking for, he doesn’t know. Probably no one knows – except for your parents maybe. 
All Taehyung is hoping for is that he wasn’t the reason.
Thoughts like ‘how long have you been seeing this guy’ and ‘did you even think about me once while you were overseas, living a brand new life’ fill Taehyung’s head as he downs the rest of his drink. He steals one last glance at you, catching your eyes for a split-second before heading towards the kitchen of this penthouse apartment he currently finds himself in. He can feel your eyes on him as he slips his way through other guests but he keeps his own eyes focused on the whiskey bottle he spots on the kitchen island.
Once he reaches it, he uncaps it and pours himself another glass. He takes a swig of the brown liquor, sighing deeply as he feels the strong and burning sensation in his throat. 
“Slow down there, tiger.”
Taehyung freezes in his spot, his glass of whiskey halfway to his lips to take another slurp when a familiar voice fills the kitchen. His chest tightens for a split-second before he turns around to face the person he’s been thinking about non-stop since she left. 
You’re flashing a smile at him when he turns around, one that doesn’t really reach your eyes as your real smile would. He notices because he always notices. It’s one of the many things you can’t hide from him. No matter how much you try to plaster on a fake smile, he’ll always know when it’s real or not. 
When he doesn’t reply to your teasing comment, you pull your lips into a thin line as you cautiously step closer.
He can’t stop staring at you. 
When you left your shared home two years ago on the worst night of Taehyung’s life, he had no idea when he would see you again. Back then he had hoped you’d regret your choice of moving out and come back to him, tell him that you made a mistake, that not being with him was the only thing you couldn’t get yourself to do.
But it never happened – and two years passed.
“How have you been?” You ask, voice small and careful as if you’re afraid he’ll scream at you and throw all his pent up anger at you as the first thing.
Taehyung finally manages to take his eyes off you, shifting them to look at the glass of whiskey in his hand. He swirls the liquid around a few times before looking up again, a faint and slightly sad smile on his face.
“Okay,” he responds. “Given the circumstances, that is.”
He can tell that you know exactly what he means, the frown on your face giving it away. It makes a short chuckle leave his lips because it’s kind of comical how you haven’t seen each other in two years and the first time you meet again is at an engagement party – the type of party you were both so sure you’d throw sooner or later had it not been for the fact that the universe wanted it differently.
“You brought a date,” Taehyung breaks the silence hanging over you.
Your lips part in surprise. You did not expect your ex-boyfriend to ask about your date, but then again, you should’ve seen it coming. 
“Uh, yeah, he’s–” you begin, not sure what or where to start. Taehyung watches you intently, curious to hear your response. You feel a strong urge to explain yourself to him, why you don’t know. “It’s nothing serious– it’s very new, so…”
“I see,” Taehyung hums and takes another sip of his whiskey, the alcohol still burning and strong on his tongue.
“Hey, about–,” you begin but the shake of Taehyung’s head causes you to stay quiet.
“We don’t have to do that,” he simply says. You frown deeply as he glances over your shoulder at your date. “I’m over it and it seems you are too.”
“But–”
“It’s good to see you again, ____.”
With that Taehyung grabs the half empty bottle of whiskey off the table and leaves the kitchen, a breath of relief escaping him. It’s gonna take a lot of alcohol to get through tonight with you being in the same room, so close yet so far – not his to touch or hold, the only thing that is his are the memories of doing exactly that in the past.
And nothing has ever left a more bitter taste in his mouth before.
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As the party carries on, Taehyung has been drinking more whiskey. He’s not drunk per say but he’s definitely tipsy and it shows as he stands in a corner alongside Jimin and Namjoon. He’s not paying attention to their conversation, too busy watching you and your date mingling. 
Taehyung is not much for admitting it but he’s been keeping an eye on your date all night, watching how he acts around you. He’s not afraid to touch you, that’s for sure, the constant placement of his hand on your lower back is a giveaway. However, he hasn’t seen the two of you kiss or anything of the sort ever since you arrived. It’s odd because, of all people, Taehyung knows that you’re not one to shy away from PDA. You were never big on it but you never despised it either.
“Tae, stop staring,” Jimin’s voice penetrates his focused thoughts. Taehyung tears his eyes from you to look at his best friend. Jimin gives him a look, one he can’t help but laugh at. Taehyung pushes himself up from his leaning position against the wall, standing to his full height. Jimin grabs his arm. “I’m serious, whatever you’re thinking, don’t.”
“Relax,” Taehyung smirks. “I’m just gonna introduce myself, that’s it.”
Namjoon shakes his head, taking a sip of his drink, “sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.”
“Exactly,” Jimin pointedly agrees with him. “Don’t ruin it.”
Taehyung shrugs off Jimin’s hand, shooting his friends a glare, “I’m not gonna ruin anything.”
Before his friends can try and talk him out of it again, he wanders off towards you and your date – a dark-haired guy who seems friendly, boring even, and nothing like the type of guy Taehyung had imagined you’d go for.
You don’t notice Taehyung’s presence until he’s standing right next to you, offering a hand to your date. Your eyes widen in surprise, eyes shifting between your ex-boyfriend, his offered hand and your date for the night. You can’t help the small sliver of panic within your chest as you watch them interact.
“Hey man, I don’t think we’ve met before,” he greets him, “I’m Taehyung.”
“Jinyoung,” your date replies, giving Taehyung’s hand a weak shake without much thought. “It’s nice to meet you.”
“Likewise.”
Taehyung smirks, eyeing Jinyoung up and down for a moment, wondering where on earth you managed to run into this guy and why you thought of bringing him to your friends’ engagement party. The majority of the people here know you and once this guy isn’t part of your life anymore, you’ll spend your energy explaining why at the next event.
“Taehyung is, um…” You begin, turning to Jinyoung to provide some information as to why he would suddenly come over and introduce himself like this. “He’s my, uh–”
“Ex-boyfriend,” Taehyung finishes for you. He watches in satisfaction as Jinyoung’s eyes widen in surprise, the faint hints of intimidation evident in them. “We broke up two years ago.”
“Oh, well, I had no idea there was an… ex-boyfriend,” Jinyoung trails off, glancing at you in confusion.
Your attention, however, is aimed at Taehyung, “Tae, can we talk–”
“Did you know ____ fled the country after breaking up with me?” Taehyung lets out a sarcastic laugh, watching how Jinyoung almost squirms in discomfort. Bet he didn’t sign up for a meeting with the ex-boyfriend when he said yes to join you tonight. “Is that where she met you or?”
Your jaw tightens as you place a hand on Taehyung’s arm, catching his attention. He glances at your hand and then you, eyes meeting yours. He notices the desperation in them, the grip you have on his arm.
“Can I talk to you under four eyes? Now, please.”
He smiles at you, a tipsy smile but endearing nonetheless.
“Absolutely,” he tells you before glancing back at Jinyoung. “If you’ll excuse us for a moment.”
Jinyoung looks confused and awkward as Taehyung flashes him a fake smile before allowing himself to be dragged away by you. It isn’t until you’re in a secluded corner of your friends’ penthouse, you let go of his arm. Taehyung leans against the wall, a small smirk on his face as you stare at him for a moment before your face morphs into disbelief.
“What the hell was that all about?”
He shrugs, “I was just introducing myself.”
You let out a chuckle, crossing your arms over your chest, “oh, is that what it was? How silly of me to think you were trying to measure your dick with his!”
He huffs out a scoff, rolling his eyes, “oh, sweetheart, I don’t have to and you know it.”
Your mouth falls open at his cocky behavior. Whoever this man in front of you is, you don’t know him. He is not the man you broke up with two years ago, he’s not even a shadow of the man you were hopelessly in love with once. 
Taehyung watches your expression fall as if realization hits you square in the face. His ego covers it up perfectly but it hurts seeing the realization on your face, his heart sinking to his stomach as he realizes himself what you just realized –neither of you are the same people you were two years ago. And for some reason that realization hurts more than he thought it would because change is supposed to be good, right?
“Maybe breaking up with you wasn’t a mistake after all,” you tell him, eyes filled with disappointment and hurt. Taehyung frowns as the words leave your lips. “You’re an asshole.”
“____, I–”
You shake your head before turning on your heel, heading back to Jinyoung who’s been watching the two of you with worried eyes. Taehyung catches Jinyoung’s gaze over your shoulder, the judgemental look he shoots at him bruising his ego. However, the sight of your hand slipping into Jinyoung’s bruises his heart as he watches you and your date bid the engaged couple goodbye before leaving the penthouse.
Hand in hand.
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Loud knocking wakes Taehyung up the following morning. He squints an eye open, the bright light coming from the morning sun hitting him straight in the face. He lets out a low groan, dropping his head back into the softness of his pillows. He forgot to pull the curtains when he came home last night. It happens too often after a night out – a bad habit, really.
The knocking disappears for a moment before it returns, more persistent this time around. With a sigh, Taehyung gets himself out of bed, slipping on a t-shirt and sweatpants before sauntering towards his front door.
Who in the world could be rapping their knuckles on his door this early on a sunday morning? 
He glances towards the kitchen, eyes squinting to read the red numbers on the oven. His eyebrows lift in surprise. It’s not morning anymore, it’s past noon and someone is very persistent on the other side of the door. Once he reaches the door, he sneaks a peek through the peephole, breath hitching in his throat when he realizes who’s on the other side. His forehead connects with the surface of the door as a low ‘fuck’ leaves his lips.
Inhaling sharply, he grabs the door handle and pulls the door open.
“What are you doing here?” He asks.
Taehyung sees no point in greeting you first, the question flying from his mouth before he can process it properly. He’s surprised to see you on his doorstep after what happened at the engagement party last night. When he came home and plopped into his bed, he had been thinking about whether or not he should seek you out to talk things through. He never got the chance to think further about it before sleep overtook and pulled him under.
“We need to talk,” you tell him, pushing past him, shoulder bumping his.
Taehyung closes the door after you before following you further into his home. You stand by his bookshelf, several feet away from him. He watches you as you look around, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants to keep them from feeling restless. 
“How do you know where I live?” He decides to ask after a moment of intense silence.
You turn to face him from your new spot by the big window, the view from it being of a park with endless rows of trees and bushes, the colors of them ranging from green to brown to orange to yellow. 
“Jimin told me,” you tell him, “but that’s not important – what the hell was your problem last night?”
Taehyung shrugs, “nothing… I was just introducing myself.”
A sarcastic laugh escapes your pretty lips, a look of amusement on your face.
“Bullshit, Tae,” you protest. “We haven’t seen each other in two years and you pull a stunt like that? It’s not like you.”
He can’t help but scoff.
Not like him? 
It’s not like him to spend two years watching women come and go in his home. It’s not like him to let the woman he loves leave him and not do shit about it for two years. It’s not like him to not care about love at all. It’s not like him to lose all faith and belief in the great love of his life but he did and it’s your fault. You made him what he is today. You up and left, leaving him because ‘things weren’t the way they used to be’. He accepted what you wanted because you were so certain that was what you wanted at the time. He shouldn’t have but he did because he loved you and he’d rather love you from a distance than keep you in a place that didn’t make you happy.
Blaming you isn’t right but it’s always easier to blame someone else than yourself.
“I pulled a stunt?” The anger that’s starting to boil within him laces within his voice as he moves closer. Your eyes are locked with his as he slowly moves across the room, nearing you. “You’re the one who brought a fucking date, _____! You knew I would be there and yet you thought ‘hey, let me bring a date and introduce him to everyone there while my ex is in the same fucking room’!”
You let out a frustrated groan.
“It’s been two years, Taehyung! For all I know, you could’ve brought someone too!”
The frustration is seeping through his veins as he steps closer, only a few feet from you at this point. You’re close and he can touch you if he just reaches his hands out to you but you’ve never felt farther away. Had he known two years ago that it would come to this, he wouldn’t have let you walk out of the door that night. He would’ve fought for you, told you that you would figure things out together. That he would do his utmost best to make you happy – no matter the sacrifices he would have to make.
“Do you know how fucking miserable I’ve been for the past two years? Do you know how many times I’ve asked about you only to get no answers from anyone?”
The guilt is evident on your face as he takes the risk and steps even closer. He can feel the warmth radiating off your body now, the close proximity doing nothing to calm his thundering heart.
“Have you ever, just for a second, thought about how fucking hard it’s been after you left and fled the fucking country?”
You let out a shaky breath, “I didn’t–”
Taehyung can’t fight the dry laugh leaving him, “I begged you to stay, ____. I was begging you but you left anyway and for what?”
He watches as you shrug helplessly, mouth opening and closing while you try to decipher what to say, how to explain. He would appreciate an explanation – ‘things aren’t the way they used to be’ isn’t enough anymore.
“I… I had some stuff I needed to figure out,” you mutter.
“We could’ve figured it out together!” He argues, hands thrown out in pure frustration.
The shake of your head has Taehyung frowning deeply. You look away, unable to watch the way his face falls as the words leave your lips, “I couldn’t love you the way you deserved. I had to leave. It was what was best for us back then–”
“No,” he mutters, voice soft and filled with sorrow, “you don’t get to decide what’s best for me.”
You feel him step back, taking his warmth with him. He sits down on the couch, running a hand through his hair as an exasperated sigh leaves his chest. You cross your arms over your chest; the act doing nothing to comfort yourself but doing enough to keep yourself warm after he removed himself from right in front of you. 
Unsure, what to do, you sit down on the window pane, watching the man you used to be inseparable from. He looks tired and not because you forced him out of bed by knocking on his door. He looks like the past two years have been nothing but hell for him – and you believe it. Leaving him was one of the hardest things you’ve ever done but it was necessary in order to find yourself.
“I didn’t tell you everything,” you quietly tell him, eyes dropping to look at the wooden floor instead of him.
You feel his eyes on you, heavy and filled with longing, hurt and love.
“I knew you’d never let me go if I told you everything,” you continue when he stays silent. “I lost myself, Tae… And I knew as long as I wasn’t at peace with myself, I wouldn’t be able to love you the way you deserved.”
You take a chance and look up, your eyes meeting his in an instant. You feel your heart skip a beat, a pain so strong it’s almost unbearable shooting through your body. Taehyung’s eyes are glossy as he watches you make your way to where he sits on the couch. You kneel in front of him, your hands finding his in a weak attempt to comfort him but you know nothing could possibly remove the two years of pain and anger he’s been through.
He stays quiet, eyes skimming your face as you sit in front of him.
“Leaving you is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do,” you softly tell him and feel a tightness in your throat. You bite back the tears but your voice betrays you as you speak up again. “And while… While trying to figure my shit out, I realized that you and I–”
Taehyung’s hands engulf yours, fingers slipping through yours to intertwine them. Pain is etched onto his face as you sniffle, one of his hands reaching up to wipe away the one teardrop that managed to escape just now.
“I realized that you and I were the only thing in my life that actually made sense but it was too late.”
“Baby…” Taehyung begins, the nickname leaving him before he can think about it and the appropriateness of it.
You shake your head, “I left you, Tae. I left and, like you said, I fled the country like a coward when all I had to do was talk to the people around me and find another way.”
The tears won’t stop coming at this point and it’s then Taehyung realizes that it was never about him. It has always been about you and how you felt; not your feelings for him but for yourself. If only you had talked to him, reached out to him and asked for help – he would’ve stepped in and done whatever it would take to make you happy again.
“I’m really sorry for all the pain I’ve caused you,” you cry, the sheer realization of just how much unnecessary pain you’ve caused him seems like the worst thing you ever could’ve done. You hurt the man you love and now it’s hurting you – well-deserved one might say. “God, you must hate me so much.”
“No, hey,” Taehyung calls softly, cupping your face and wiping your tears away. You look up at him, tear-filled eyes meeting his glossy ones. He smiles at you through the build-up tears in his dark brown eyes. “I don’t hate you. I could never hate you.”
“But–”
He shakes his head, “sure, I’m pissed at you for leaving. But I could never hate you, _____.”
The way he says it with such tenderness and softness makes your bottom lip quiver, fresh tears coming to the surface but it’s not an issue – Taehyung wipes them away with the pads of his thumbs, smiling softly at you. Why he’s comforting you rather than kicking you out of his home is a mystery to you, one you probably won’t ever solve. But you’ll take it, the feeling of his hands touching you again similar to the feeling of finally drinking water again after spending days in the desert. Or when you finally get to sleep after a really, really long and stressful day.
Comforting. Healing. Loving. 
“I’m sorry,” you softly say, voice so quiet and soft as if the atmosphere would break into a million pieces if you spoke any louder. Your heart is beating hard, thundering at 110 miles per hour. Taehyung is leaning closer, a magnetic pull between him and you causing him to do so. It’s impossible to stay away, especially after you sat down in front of him.
Taehyung huffs out a soft chuckle, the air brushing your lips. He whispers, “stop apologizing.”
“Sorry,” you whisper, causing Taehyung to let another chuckle escape before softly, carefully pressing his lips to yours. 
The world stops spinning and your heart stops beating for a second, the feeling of Taehyung’s lips on yours so familiar you might start crying again. It’s like returning home after years of chaotic traveling, the familiarity of it so comforting and perfect. You sigh deeply, melting against him, hands gripping his forearms as if to support yourself. Then a soft moan escapes you and Taehyung tilts his head to deepen the kiss, tongue brushing your bottom lip before slipping inside and touching yours, warm and wet and so addicting.
In need of more, you get up and push him back on the couch. He welcomes you onto his lap, pulling you closer, hands gripping your waist tightly, fingertips digging into your sides. The kisses you share are soft, passionate, and filled with words and affection you’ve kept inside for two years. Things you never got to say and affection you never got to show – all of it being poured into the kisses, deep and scorching hot.
Your arms lock around his neck, pulling him so close your noses are squishes together. He moans against your lips when your hips sink down on him, grinding against him. He feels himself grow harder, blood rushing to his cock in seconds as you continue your movements. 
“Tae…” You whimper softly when his hands slide underneath your top, warm palms sliding over the expanse of your back, nails digging into your skin. “Need you– please…”
In reality, you’re not his to touch and kiss. You haven’t been for two years. When this weekend is over, you’ll both go back to your everyday lives, return to reality – realities where neither of you are in each other’s. 
“What about Jinyoung?” Taehyung can’t help but ask, pulling away just enough to look you in the eyes.
“He went back home this morning,” you tell him, your words causing a sliver of hope to appear in Taehyung’s chest. You smile softly, fingers playing with the curly strands of black hair at the back of his neck. You shrug with a sigh, “he asked about us, I told him the truth. He left.”
“What truth?”
The question is careful but Taehyung needs to know.
“That I’m still in love with you,” you quietly admit.
If you can’t feel the harsh beating of Taehyung’s heart, you surely must be able to hear it. It’s pounding against his rib cage, making it hard for him to breathe as he stares at you. A million thoughts are running through his mind but the only thing he can focus on is the overwhelming urge to kiss you like the world is ending, worship you and make up for lost time.
“I don’t blame you if you can’t forgive me for what I did,” you softly say. “But I hope you’ll give me a chance to-“
Taehyung cuts you off by crashing his mouth to yours; desperate, needy, eager and rushed. A whimpering moan escapes you and travels into his mouth, goosebumps rising upon his skin at the pretty sound.
“I forgive you,” he says between kisses as he pushes your jacket off your shoulders. You help him get rid of it, lips never leaving his as you continue to kiss. You have two years to catch up on – two years equals a lot of kisses and a lot of making love. You inhale deeply when he pulls away, hand gripping your jaw to make you look at him. His eyes stare into yours, dark and filled with so many emotions you can barely keep track. “Don’t make me regret it.”
You shake your head, “I won’t. I promise.”
“Good,” he whispers before pulling you back in for more, unable to stop for long.
The next clothing items to go are your top and his t-shirt as you tug it up and over his head, throwing it to the floor along with your jacket. Taehyung lets out a breathless moan against your mouth when you slide your hands up his abdomen, fingertips brushing over his chest and nipples. He groans as your nails dig into his skin, hands tightly gripping onto your thighs in a wordless response.
“Lay down,” he tells you, voice raspy from making out.
With one last soft kiss to his lips, you do as told. You lay down on the couch, watching him as he gets up on his feet, getting rid of his sweatpants. His eyes roam your body, grazing your skin and curves, taking it all in while feeling a wave of memories washing over him. It brings a feeling he can’t quite pinpoint to his chest, heart tightening as you offer him a soft smile.
Home.
That’s what he feels.
He finally feels at home again after two years of feeling like he didn’t belong in this new apartment of his; an apartment he found a few months after you left. He couldn’t stand being in the one you used to share because it didn’t feel like a home anymore. It’s when you sit up on the couch, your hand reaching for his to bring him back to you, that he realizes that no place will ever feel like home unless you’re there.
You’re his home – he belongs with you.
And you belong with him.
“Come back to me,” you whisper softly when he crawls onto the couch, hovering over you. His eyes shift between yours, three words he hasn’t said out loud to anyone but you at the tip of his tongue. “Tae…–”
“I love you.”
Your words get trapped in your throat, heart beating wildly in your chest as the three magical words bring a new kind of warmth to your entire body.
“I love you too.”
The rest is a blur – the way he kisses you deeply and passionately like it’s the last time, the sound of your pretty moans reaching his ears like a melody he’ll never get tired of, the feeling of his hands on your body, caressing you, taking you in and remembering everything about you; every dip and curve of your body. Every uneven texture of your skin, every dimple and small spot that makes you you.
“You’re mine,” he rasps against your chest as he trails it with kisses, your bra no longer covering you, giving him free access to all of you. His lips brush your nipple, another delicate moan escaping your lips at the feeling. “You’ve always been mine, haven’t you?”
“Yes– Oh my god,” You gasp, surprise shooting through you as he wraps his lips around a nipple, sucking. Your back arches into him as one of his hands cups the other breast, squeezing and caressing it in the most caring way possible.
That’s the thing about Taehyung – he can be rough both verbally and physically but he knows how you like it and he never strays far away from it. He’ll caress your body and worship it like you’re a goddess while arousing you with his words, dirty words falling from his lips without a struggle. It’s the perfect mix of everything; the best of both worlds basically.
You whimper softly when he tugs at your nipple with his teeth before letting go, leaving it wet and swollen as he moves further down your naked body. Your legs spread automatically when he reaches your core, his mouth hovering above your heat as he glances up at you. A small smirk spreads across his face as he watches you run your hands over your stomach and all the way up to cup your own breasts. You bite your lip, eyes closed as you await his touch.
“Tell me, baby,” he hums, leaving a soft kiss on your hip bone. “Did you miss this?”
You hum in response, fingers pinching your nipples as you feel his breath on your core.
“Words,” he reminds you, “I need your words.”
Your eyes peep open to glance down at him, the sight of him between your legs, messy and curly hair and swollen, plump lips twisted into a teasing smirk enough to cause you to let out a soft moan.
“Yes,” you tell him, breathlessly. “I missed you, missed your touch– please, Tae…”
The sound of you begging for him to touch you causes a feeling of pride to fill his entire body, the smirk on his face turning into a grin. He hums in satisfaction, leaning down to press a soft, careful kiss to your folds. You whimper softly, the hints of whine following.
“I’ll be honest,” the air from his words brushes your soaked core, a shiver running through your body. His hands tighten around your thighs as he brings them over his shoulders to pull you closer to his face. “I missed having you like this, too.”
Before you can even think of a response to his confession, his mouth is on you. You gasp in surprise, hands reaching for him to grab his hair, the couch, his hand – anything. Taehyung offers one of his hands, locking it with yours. Your fingers slip between his, your grip tight as he eats you out, his tongue licking your folds. You’re whimpering above him, the feeling of his tongue flicking your clit over and over again before he sucks it causing your moans to become higher and more whiny as he works you closer to the edge.
“Fuck,” you cry, thighs trembling as you feel your orgasm coming. Taehyung keeps your legs spread open with his free hand, his grip on you so strong you’re unable to escape the overwhelming feeling of an orgasm. “Tae, I’m close– fuckfuckfuck–”
An immense wave of pleasure washes over you, a guttural moan leaving your pretty lips as you tumble over the edge, abdomen tightening as you come. Taehyung moans against you as he continues to help you through it, licking up your juices, the slurping noises lewd and explicit enough to bring a heat to your face.
You’re trying to catch your breath, a smile on your face as Taehyung crawls back up. You sigh deeply as he leans down and presses a row of kisses onto your jaw and cheek, one of his hands sliding up your thigh.
“You feeling okay?” He asks, face inches from yours as his eyes meet yours.
You nod, smiling, “I feel great.”
He smiles softly as he leans down, connecting his mouth with yours. You’re able to taste yourself on his tongue as it brushes yours, the taste arousing and dirty but so hot, you might lose your mind.
“Wanna be inside you,” he groans as he grinds against you, the only thing keeping him from slipping inside being his boxers. His cock twitches in its confinements, eager to be let free, eager to be buried deeply within your warmth. “Wanna make love to you, baby– show you how much I’ve missed you…”
“Do it, Tae,” you urge him on, hands reaching for the waistband of his boxers, “show me.”
With his help, you manage to free his hard cock, his boxers ending up on the floor with the rest of your discarded clothes. Your hand wraps around his length, a soft groan escaping his lips as he drops his head to your shoulder. You pump him a few times before guiding the tip to your entrance, softly gasping when you feel it nested between your folds.
Taehyung takes over, replacing your hand with his own. Your arms snake around his neck, pulling him closer, lips catching his in a kiss. He takes this as his chance to slip inside, pushing against your entrance until he’s past your folds. You both moan against each other’s mouth as he sinks inside, the length and girth of him stretching you out. He moves slowly, sliding further inside inch after inch, carefully.
“Fuck, baby,” he groans once he bottoms out, every inch of him engulfed by your warm walls. His breathing is ragged as he stays still for a moment. “I’ll never get used to this.”
You smile at his comment, wrapping your legs around his waist. 
“Well, you better,” you tell him. “Because this time it’s forever.”
His heart skips a beat in his chest before he huffs out a strained laugh, the feeling of your walls tightening around him making it difficult for him to get words out.
“Is that a challenge or a promise?”
You shrug and smirks playfully, leaning up to kiss the corner of his mouth, “a challenging promise.”
He scoffs in amusement but doesn’t say anything in return. Instead he pulls out, leaving just the tip inside before thrusting back inside of you, hard and precise. The action leaves you gasping, back arching as he hits a sweet spot within you. He continues the action, pulling out and thrusting back in over and over again, fucking you hard but slow, his shaft brushing against your clit for every thrust.
“Fuck– feels good,” you whimper as he hooks a hand underneath your leg to change the angle of his thrusts. Your mouth falls open as he slides in even deeper, his tip hitting that sweet spot repeatedly.
“Yeah?” He watches you nod, teeth digging into your bottom lip as you suppress a moan. “Did he ever have you like this, huh? Did he ever make you feel like this?”
Taehyung knows expecting you to not have been with anyone since you broke up is a long stretch. The only thing that bothers him is if you’ve been with the one man he met and talked to last night. The thought of you and him together brings a bitter taste to his mouth and he just needs you to deny it.
The sudden possessive tone of his words has your heart beating faster. He doesn’t have to mention any name for you to know who he’s referring to. Like you said when you first talked to Taehyung at the party, you and Jinyoung’s relationship was nothing serious, very new and not intimate at all. You had barely kissed him properly – something held you back every time it would take a turn into something more.
The look in Taehyung’s eyes tells you he needs to know. He needs to know if you ever gave that part of yourself to Jinyoung.
“No,” you tell him, keeping eye contact as you answer him, hoping it’ll give him the peace of mind that he needs. Taehyung’s face softens as he lets his forehead drop to yours, his breath clashing against your face. You cup his face, thumbs brushing over his jawline where faint stubble is starting to appear. “He didn’t.”
The relief that runs through Taehyung’s body is evident in his kiss as he connects his mouth with yours, his free hand reaching up to grab one of yours. He intertwines your hands, bringing it above your head as he returns to the task at hand – getting you both to the edge. 
The constant touch of his tip to a certain spot within you has you reaching another orgasm faster than you’re prepared for. It washes over you in huge waves, running through your body with such force your walls tighten around him. Taehyung moans deeply, his thrusts becoming uneven as he, too, reaches his high. Soft words of encouragement reach his ear as he drops his head to your shoulder. Your fingers slide into his thick, black hair while your other hand tightens its grip around his.
He lowly groans as he stills within you, spurts of hot and white cum painting your walls as he comes, “shit–”
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Hours later you’re watching Taehyung’s fingers play with yours as he holds your hand up in the air, both of you watching it as a comfortable silence surrounds you. It’s nice – to be cuddled up with him again after so long. You didn’t realize just how much you had missed him until you saw him last night. But despite the blissful atmosphere, there’s still an underlying tension of something that you need to talk about. Whether it’s your guilt for leaving or his regret for not fighting more is unknown.
“I wish I could go back in time,” you suddenly break the silence.
“Why do you say that?”
Taehyung brings your hand down, intertwining them instead as he leaves them to lay on top of the blanket covering your naked bodies. You continue to stare at your intertwined hands, wondering how it’s possible to match so perfectly with someone only for you to leave for two years despite them being where you belong.
“I wish I could go back and do it differently.”
Taehyung stays quiet for a moment before speaking up, “you can’t change the past, baby.”
His voice is delicate and soft, comforting.
“I know,” you sigh. “I just hate that I caused you so much pain. It was unnecessary and uncalled for. I should’ve just talked to you about it instead.”
“I think a lot of things could’ve been avoided if we had just talked about it but like I said… You can’t change the past,” he carefully grabs your chin to make you look at him. “Besides, we found our way back, right? We got a second chance at this, at us. Let’s make the best of it, yeah?”
A smile spreads across your face as you lean up and kiss him, the kiss soft yet deep and filled with the things you still haven’t said; apologies, I love you’s, promises and everything in between.
Taehyung sighs deeply against your lips, cupping your face, “I missed kissing you.”
You can’t help but grin against his mouth, “keep doing it then.”
“Oh, I’m planning on it,” he tells you, a squeal escaping you as he rolls over, trapping you beneath him. He dips down and kisses you again, this time with more force and eagerness.
That great love in life that everyone keeps talking about is really not worth much if it’s not with the right person. Taehyung used to believe that there was only one true love for everyone. Two years ago, he lost all belief in that. There was no point in looking for that great, true love because he already had it and he lost it. And even if there is more than one true love for everyone, he wouldn’t want it if it’s not you.
It seems his beliefs have been restored.
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all rights reserved © mercurygguk, 2022. copying and/or reposting any of my work on any platform is NOT allowed. translations are NOT allowed.
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plus-size-reader · 2 years
Text
Dating Steve Harrington HC
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~Steve, as he is right now, is the best boyfriend anyone could ever have
~He loves completely and totally, without exception, and there would be nothing that would keep him from showing you that love, every hour of every day
~Unlike Robin, who prefers to keep her physical love more private, Steve can’t get enough of PDA and loving on you all the time
~It doesn’t matter who’s around or what the context is, If Steve wants to hug you, he’s going to hug you. If he wants to kiss you like it’s the last time he’ll ever get the chance, he’ll kiss you.
~Steve is a relationship man, even if it took him a long time to realize it, and there is nothing more he wants than to be in a committed loving relationship for as long as he can
~Playing with his hair, and messing around with it, putting it in different styles and tormenting him over it just because you know that you can
~Loves to look at you, to stare at you and take in your ever detail as if it’s the last thing he’ll ever have the privilege of seeing
~Even if it’s a little creepy sometimes.
~”You’re staring at me, again”
~”I can’t help it, I’m just pretty sure you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen”
~Late night phone calls.
~It doesn’t matter if you’re talking, or if Steve’s talking, you’ll both stay on that line until the sun comes up, just chatting about whatever comes up
~Steve loves drama
~He may not be King Steve anymore but there’s a part of him that is a huge fan of being in the center of all the hot gossip. Though, as of late, your hot gossip has been talking to Dustin about Suzy and the science fair
~The topic has changed, but the energy your man brings to the table has not.
~Steve would do absolutely anything to make you laugh, and I mean absolutely anything.
~Once, when you were having dinner at your favorite chinese place in town, he stuck chopsticks so far up his nose you actually thought you’d have to drive him to the hospital, just on the off chance you’d find it funny
~Play fighting, and picking fights over the stupidest things all the time, just because you can. Steve’s favorite ‘fight’ to have, is who loves who more, which can go on for hours.
~”I DEFINITELY LOVE YOU MORE”
~”NO WAY, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. IT’S NOT POSSIBLE FOR YOU TO LOVE ME MORE THAN I LOVE YOU”
~Steve is easily jealous, and doesn’t even bother hiding it. Somebody gets too comfortable with you, or oversteps some invisible boundary he doesn’t even know he has, and they’re going to have him to deal with.
~Not that he’s all that scary, when it comes down to it.
~There isn’t anything Steve wouldn’t do to protect you or those kids, but that doesn’t mean he’s aggressive or violent, and he doesn’t have it in him to be.
~Steve is basically a teddy bear in a windbreaker and you’d never have him any other way.
~He just loves you so much
~Driving around in Steve’s car, all the time, for any reason, because that is about as close to perfection as he thinks he can get. He loves feeling the wind on his face as you crudely sing along to Paula Abdul at the top of your lungs.
~Steve is the kind of guy to match his partner, and you will never convince me otherwise. Whether you’d color coordinating or just wearing matching sweaters or shirts, he’s all for it.
~He’ll all for lots of things when it comes to you, things like game nights with the kids and dinner with your parents, all dressed up in a button up and slacks
~Just to make you happy
~Because, at the end of the day, Steve would do absolutely anything if it meant making you happy
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littlemessyjessi · 2 years
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"Mummy Calzones": Billy Hargrove and his Goth GF
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Billy Hargrove and His Goth GF
Billy Hargrove of Stranger Things 
Billy x PS Reader, Billy x Goth GF 
Pre-established relationship 
.
10/10 treats as you as his little dark queen. 
Doesn't matter if you're little or not. 
You're his baby batling and he'll accept nothing less. 
And so like maybe you have to take Home Ec.  Idk, maybe it was required (it was the 80s) or maybe you just wanted like an easy class.  Idk. 
But like maybe one day you have to make something for the whole class concerning bread.  And maybe you decided to make calzones because they're bread and you can fill them with delicious fillings.  And maybe you decided to make them mummies because it was the perfect opportunity to try the braiding technique. 
And then… nobody would even try them in class.  You're teacher gave you a weird look and your classmates made fun of you because you're the goth kid.  And because 'who makes mummies?' 
And like, you're kinda bummed because you worked really hard on them.  And so you just kinda drag your feet out to the parking lot at the end of the day because you know Billy is out there waiting to take you home.   
And he spots you standing there all dejected with your little tupperware container in your arms and a sad look on your face.  
Naturally, this will not stand.  So he ask you about it and you tell him because it's Billy and you know he's not gonna stop until he has found the source of your unhappiness and remedied it.   
And he's quiet for a moment but then he just takes it from your hands and places a kiss to your forehead.  
"Fuck them, baby.   More for me." he said and rips the lid off.  "I'm fucking starving." 
And homeboy just tears into them, complimenting you on your skills because they are admittedly fucking delicious.  And he tells you how he loves how you think out of the box.  And how creative you are.  And how these are clearly superior to regular calzones anyway. 
And you fall in love all over again because damn it, he's good. 
And it's like that alot with Billy because he knows what it feels like to be singled out. 
Sure, he knows he's hot when it comes to high school. 
He knows he's attractive and it would be easy for him to get what he wants in that crowd. 
He knows he can easily fit in with the popular crowd because he slaughters in basketball, is great in the pool and kills any keg stand competition there is. 
But he also knows what it feels like to be ridiculed on a personal level.  For literally doing nothing.  He knows that kind of pain. 
And he hates it.   He hates it even more because he loves you so much. 
You're his happy place and he couldn't care less what anyone thought about it. 
He knows that he can't change the opinions of others.  
He can't change the past or the hurt. 
However, he knows that he can act in the moment and let you know just how much you mean to him. 
So he does. 
Every chance he gets. 
Hey, loves.  Damn.  I'm fucking soft ok.  Nobody touch me.   Anyway, I would love to know what you think of Billy and his goth gf and if you want to see more of them, please just let me know.  Because, ugh,  I'm so soft for them.  
Love, K 
@toomanyfictionalboyfriends
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@blackirisposts
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b1mbodoll · 7 months
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how can u say bull hoon like i’m in a crisis now. just thinking about beefy hoon being brought into a new farm and immediately becoming obsessed with the sweet little farmhand who’s in charge of collecting his seed. everyone’s always talking about how impeccable the quality of his seed is and how they’re gonna have to have him breed with the cow girls. but why would hoon go near those girls when he can just dump his load into his pretty little farmer and make her carry his calf :( just thinking about her all round and swollen with his baby has him pumping load after load into her
pairings: park sunghoon x f! reader
warnings: hybrids + courting + oral + scent kink + strength kink + begging + jealousy + pregnancy
💌: help u sent me !!!! into a crisis im going to think about this for literally forevwr like i cant rn omfgkfsoskkfjfkskdnf i need him ps it doesnt matter what u look like i promise bull! hoon is large and in fucking charge!!!!!!!!!
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bull! hoon is no stranger to sex. sometimes farmers would slap a wad of cash on his handler’s desk n he’d be sent to the field where a scared little cow hybrid was waiting for him to take what he wants, but he never did. instead he’d stay away from the heifer n do his own thing until her owner would get angry n snatch their payment, cursing sunghoon as the pair leave because how dare the bull not seduce his hybrid!!!!!!
his handler gets fed up with the constant failed breeding attempts n sends him your way, tired of dealing with such a stubborn bull. when sunghoon lays his eyes on you it’s like his personality does a complete 180. he’s no longer cold and distant n is so careful with you because ur such a tiny little thing in comparison to the buff bull.
when you try introducing him to ur sweet cow hybrids sunghoon is so distraught because he’s been courting you for weeks n this is the final nail in the coffin, he can’t keep pretending like he doesn’t wanna pound you til you’re crying. completely unaware of the bull boy’s feelings you leave the pair alone, tending to your other hybrids in the meantime.
sunghoon’s snorting and stomping his feet because he’s so angry!!! he doesn’t want to fuck a cowgirl he wants you!!!! wants to stuff you full of cum n make you a slut for his dick til all you can think about is getting bred :( sends the cowgirl back to her pen n waits for you in the pasture
when you return to check on them you’re surprised to find the bull alone, slipping into the fenced in area with him before asking, “hi hoonie, what’s wrong? did something happen?” he nearly caves at the sound of your sweet voice laced with worry, but he maintains his composure. “what’s wrong?” he snorts angrily, “what’s wrong is i’ve been tryin’ to show you i’m worthy of being your mate but you won’t give me the time of day!” the shock is evident in your face and hoon cant believe you really didnt know his intentions. “wha? hoonie i can’t be your mate! you don’t know what you’re talkin’ about, y’just haven’t met the right cow!” you continue making excuses for him and he’s had enough, biceps flexing as he shoves you facefirst into the dirt.
the display of strength has your cunt dripping and you can only pray he doesn’t notice. but he’s a top hybrid, the best of the best and his sharp nose instantly picks up on your arousal. “stay down” he grunts, making sure you’re properly presenting for him before making his way behind you and tearing your shorts off with his large hands, leaving you clad only in your tiny tank top and cotton panties drenched in your juices.
your bull stuffs his face between your thighs n shoves his nose right up against your cunt, inhaling deeply and becoming obsessed with how good your pussy smells. “if y’can’t be my mate then why are you so wet, human?” you’re so embarrassed n your hole clenches around nothing at his words. “‘s normal sunghoon! what else do you expect after treating me like this?” he ignores you completely n rips your panties off, throwing them to the side before digging in, mouth slurping at your pussy like he’s fucking starving.
his tongue is so fucking long and he’s so skilled, it’s not long before you’re creaming. “you’re ready.” is all he says before lining his dick up with your sloppy cunt, filling you in one quick thrust. he moans so loud you’re sure the entire farm can hear him, feeling sorry for your hybrids because you can’t bring yourself to make him pull out. “you wanna cum again, sweetheart?” you nod your head like crazy, wanting nothing more than to milk his dick for all it’s worth. “then fucking beg.” sunghoon is a dirty pervert and you’re just as bad, begging instantly with no hesitation. “please hoonie! wanna be your breeding bitch, need your thick cum inside now! wanna cum with you n feel you impregnate me, please!” he’s in fucking heaven, cums so hard n so much it’s no wonder he’s a prized bull, fills you up so well it makes you black out.
after he makes you cum again sunghoon carries you inside, tucking you into your bed before taking his spot next to you. when you wake up the following morning your body is so sore and you still feel so full because sunghoon is insatiable and couldn’t resist fucking you til he passed out from exhaustion. as you make your way around the farm to check on your hybrids you can’t help but notice how they’re staring at you, jake, your sweet dog hybrid is even outright glaring at you because how could sunghoon get to you first? it’s only fair if he gets a turn because he was here before that damn bull!
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nhularin · 8 months
Text
you dont even know my name do ya?
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PAIRING uni student! jake x barista! reader GENRE fluff, strangers to lovers, whipped jake WARNINGS not proofread OTHER just me, a barista, being absolutely delulu with jake WC 0.7k
series masterlist PERM TAGLIST @avocarua @misokei
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February 26, 1998
jake found himself in the busy yet strangely comforting café near campus. It was a place where he could focus on his studies (well, technically he wasnt studying, just looking at his screen trying to look as smart as his friend heeseung, without distractions. and it didn't hurt that you, the cute barista had quickly become a highlight of his visits. he didnt know your name, but it didnt stop him from spending hours at that crammed coffee shop just to admire your form. jay told him to just stop being a weirdo and drop his unrequited admiration, which he just ignored
But wait a minute while I make you mine, make you mine
you were vibrant and kind, always greeting him with a warm smile as he ordered his usual drink ( a taro milk tea with peach bubbles and cheese foam). he'd admire you from afar, secretly harboring a crush that seemed to grow with each passing day. But he didn't have the courage to tell you how he felt, fearing rejection or making things awkward. he didnt want you to think that hes a weirdo, or worse, like sunghoon.
every day, he would visit the shop, hoping for a chance to exchange a few words with you, mostly talking aboit his annoying professor and you questioning his choice of beverage. he would spend hours at a table, pretending to work on his assignments while secretly stealing glances at you. just hearing your name leave your coworkers lips makes him feel giddy
I'm all nervous 'cause you're on my mind all the time
on a seemingly mundane monday, he entered the café, his mind preoccupied with you instead of his upcoming biology exam. as he approached the counter, his heart skipped a beat. there you stood, smiling at him and beautiful as ever with your cute green apron draped around your frame. he couldnt stop the scenarios of you two cooking together in his apartment form in his head
"hello my friend! the usual again?" you have asked, shaking your head with that intoxicating smile "you know, you should start drinking something else, its going to mess up your bowls. we dont want the fiasco from last week repeating, do we?"
all jake could do was lower his head in embarrassment. he remembered telling you about how he shat his pants in the middle of his anatomy exam, excusing himself to the restroom where he found brown spots coating his jeans.
"yeah i think thats a great idea" he muttered out with faux confidence, good job jaeyun "just give me whatever you like. i know you have great taste" (in men, please date me)
I'm usually pretty talkative, what's wrong with me?
after he paid for his drink and definitely overpriced sandwich, he made his way to his regular table by the window, where he could peacefully enjoy his meal and fantasize about you without any disturbance.
but he noticed something different. there, written in a messy yet delicate handwriting, was your name and number. his eyes widened with surprise, a mix of excitement and nervousness flooding in his veins. he gazed at the cup for what seems like hours, a chaotic mess of thoughts swirling in his mind. could this be an accident? was this meant for someone else? he was going to kill that lucky asshole if it was. or was it a genuine invitation? were you flirting with him? THE yn?
"hey stranger! i know we dont really know each other but i'd love to invite you for a drink outside of this shop <3 here's my number, i hope it doesnt sound weird :( +82-XXX-XXX-XXX
ps: please start studying instead of just gazing into the distance"
a smile spread across jakes face, and a surge of joy filled his heart. he took a deep breath, his whole body trembling with excitement and nerves. with a mix of determination and hope, he quickly pulled out his phone and saved your number 'ynie <3'
oh how jay was wrong
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lovechar · 2 months
Text
Silver Necklace.
pairing; Regulus Black x Potter!Reader
summary; after being paired with regulus black in potions class, you manage to slowly become friends. he steals your heart and it’s only a matter of time till he breaks it.
warnings; overall just angst, bits of fluff, mentions of sex (just asking about it, no smut), making out, enemies to lovers-esque
notes; fem!reader, mean-ish(??) regulus at start, no use of y/n, kinda long fic so not proof read, ps. i know sirius is 1959 but it works out better if he’s 1960 so don’t come at me, also, i read atyd for this .. (so this is kinda influenced by that)
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Every passing day, you swore your heart ached more and more. Every glance you cast over to him in the halls, passing by as if strangers when not even a couple months ago you had been laughing and confiding in each other like idiots.
He had become so lifeless in such a short amount of time. You felt as if your grasp on your once joyful life had slipped through your fingers like coarse grains of sand.
Sooner than later, you had found yourself conflicted. Battling between wanting him by your side but having your beliefs clash. Then it was revealed and all was lost. You just wish you had the strength to go on as if he didn’t exist, like you used to.
It had all started during your fifth year at Hogwarts. You normally kept to yourself, only really talking to your friends and of course the boys: James, Sirius, Remus and Peter. In all honesty, you forgot Regulus existed most of the time.
That was till you two were paired for a potions class. He was very intelligent, you must admit. But also quite snarky.
“You will each be assigned a partner and then I would like you to work together to brew a specific potion,” your Potions Master, Professor Slughorn babbled on. “You will be given a maximum time period of three weeks to complete the potion then will be graded on it.”
You sort of tuned out after that. The professor kept talking, listing out names and assigning the pairs a specific potion. Your head snapped back in his direction when he called out your name. “And . . . Regulus Black.” Your eyes met his stoic grey ones. Merlin, he looked so similar to Sirius yet so unique, you thought, holding the same dark hair and high placed cheekbones. You must admit he was very good looking.
“You all will be making a Polyjuice Potion, which you can find in page 57 of your books. The lacewing flies, I have already stewed for each of you to save time. I advise you also check your potions some evenings to make sure they’re going well. ” Walking over to a table as Regulus Black followed, you pulled out your potion making book. The boy beside you watched as you flicked through the pages, looking for the Polyjuice potion, still not uttering a word to you.
Finally, you found it. “Aha!” You mumbled as the corners of your lips quirked up slightly. After sitting in silence, you had decided to spark up conversation.
“Here’s the ingredients list. Could you get the cauldron ready while I gather the other ingredients?” Your eyes once again looked up to meet his as he muttered out a gravelly response and did as you asked.
After twenty minutes, the bell had rung commencing the end of class. You turned to Regulus to say something to him but he had already left. With a sigh, you gathered your things and headed to your next class.
You were now sitting with Lily in the Great Hall, waiting on your brother and his friends. “I’m stuck paired with Sirius’ brother for Potions. He’s barely said a word to me at all, don’t you think that’s a bit strange?” You asked the red-haired girl, while casting a gaze over the Slytherin Table. Lily had replied but her words went through your ears as you studied the black and green robes. Your eyes flickered over to Regulus Black. He sat chatting to Evan Rosier.
“There they are,” a familiar voice came, before the person owning it plunked down beside you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. “Hi Sirius,” you gave him a tight-lipped smile. James sat across from him, beside Lily, and Remus had took a spot on the opposite side of you. “Hi Moony,” you had said when the brown haired boy ruffed your hair. “Hello to them but not to your own brother,” James frowned. You rolled your eyes playfully, “Hi James.”
The group made small talk and you (once again) tuned out. You sort of had a habit of that. Glancing around the Great Hall, your eye connected once again to your potions partner. Surprisingly, his were already set in your direction, glaring at the back of James’ head, then across to his brother. Then the grey-toned orbs clicked with your own. Hurriedly looking away, your cheeks burned at being caught staring at him. Weird, he was already watching us, you had thought. Shrugging off your thoughts, you decided to just forget about that embarrassing moment.
Trudging through the halls to potions class, you had arrived with a few minutes till class started. It was when you were gathering your things again and setting it down to the table that Regulus Black stepped over and took a place beside you. You were reminded of catching him watching your group yesterday, but quickly dismissed it.
“Hi,” you said while gathering the Polyjuice ingredients, not bothering to lift your head up to the boy. You glanced up to him with furrowed brows when you were met with no reply. He gazed down at you with a condescending look on his grey, dark eyes. “Right . . well, we should start. There’s 4 parts; we should have this done by the last class till it’s due.”
Regulus stood in front of the cauldron and you held the book in the crevice of your elbow. “It says here: Add 3 measures of fluxweed.” Grabbing the container of fluxweed, he added what was needed into the cauldron. “I don’t need you to read me out everything, I am not illiterate,” the Black brother grumbled, laced with an irritated tone. His voice was smooth and pronounced and you would’ve wished for him to speak a little more, had his words not been so unkind. It reminded you heavily of his elder brother’s; aristocratic and noble.
With a scoff, you threw the book down onto the table to the right of the boy. “Well, what do you suppose I do if you’re going to make the potion?” Regulus ignored you, not having a response to your question.
“Move.” You pushed Regulus out of the way of the cauldron, following the next step in the guide. “What do you think you’re doing?” His brows were angled down and his colourless eyes narrowed into a glare. “Well, if you won’t let me help, I’m not going to let you brew the whole thing. Who says you wont fuck it up?” “I would mess it up? God, you Potters are so obnoxious,” he spat.
“Mister Black, Miss Potter. Do we have a problem?” Slughorn asked the two of you. “No, Professor,” Regulus answered as quick as it was asked. He had reciprocated your actions, shoving you out of the way and taking control of the potion again. He grabbed your wrist in a tight, iron grip that it was almost sore. “Shut up, and do not cause another scene.” He glowered at you before finally letting go of your wrist. There was a red ring in the tracing of where he grasped your arm so roughly. You wouldn’t be surprised if it bruised.
The Marauders and you had sat in the Gryffindor common room along with one of your dorm mates, Marlene McKinnon. “Merlin, Sirius. Your brother is the biggest git I’ve ever met.” Sirius, who sat on the ground beside the fireplace, gave you a puzzled look. “Why? What’s he done?” You had explained the situation that had occurred during potions. Sirius had only replied with an ‘oh’. You rolled your eyes at the dry response but had left it at that.
Marlene spoke up from beside you on the couch. “Did you lot hear, Lucius Malfoy’s planning on joining the Death Eaters?” Her soft voice echoed through the empty common room. “He’s hardly actually going to join,” James spoke up, doubt written all over his face, “He barely left school. Only a couple years ago.”
“He was a Slytherin, them lot are the type. Horrid,” Marlene spoke again. The Death Eaters were starting to gain more members but you hadn’t thought people you knew would start joining.
Rising from your seat on the couch had caught Marlene’s attention. “Where are you going?” The bright blonde questioned you. “Just goin’ to check on Slughorn’s assignment. You want me to check yours? James, I’m borrowing the invisibility cloak.” You didn’t bother waiting for an answer before taking it.
“Yes, please. Thanks mate.” She flashed you a beaming smile and you exited your house’s common room.
It was late now and you were unsure if it was even a good idea leaving the common room at this time. The prefects were probably done their patrol by now, leaving just you and creepy old Filch wandering the halls alone. It was fine though, he wouldn’t be able to see you with the cloak on.
“Lumos,” you whispered, holding your wand out as the cloak draped over your lower arm. The tip of your vine wood wand came alight in a blue-white colour, brightening the hall for you to be able to roam freely with vision.
It wasn’t long till you navigated your way to the Potions class, carefully pushing the door ajar so that it wouldn’t let out it’s usual croaks. Upon stepping inside, your—well, James’ actually—invisibility cloak was thrown off and ditched onto the cold tiles of Slughorn’s classroom.
Stepping further into the classroom, majority of the room was dark, aside from a corner where your cauldron happened to be. An illuminating light, that appeared to be the Lumos charm, lit the crevice of the room. A dark figure stood with it’s back to you. Would it be too late to slip back on the cloak and run back to your dorm?
The answer to that was already decided when the figure spoke as it turned to your direction, “Who’s there?” It appeared to be the younger Black brother. When your eyes had met, his face quickly turned to a scowl.
“Oh, just you, Potter.” His voice seemed to be laced with venom when he had spat your surname. “What are you doing here?” You asked, cautiously stepping up to the cauldron and the angsty boy. Peering into the cauldron, your potion seemed to be doing fine. “What does it look like? Someone has to check on it, seeing as you don’t.” Regulus’ tone was harsh. You scratched the back of your head and walked over to another cauldron; Marlene and her partner’s. The boy just watched you as you checked if hers was going well.
“Sorry, I just forgot. You were the one who was so sure that you didn’t need my help anyway.” He just ignored your comment. “Listen, you can check on it on Thursday and I’ll check on it Saturday. We’ll keep watching it every two nights, taking turns. Alright with you?” He pondered for a minute over your decision before agreeing to it. “Alright.”
You walked into the great hall, venturing over to the Gryffindor table and taking a seat between Peter and James. “Morning,” you greeted, it being followed with repetition. “Big quidditch game this Friday; first of the season. You all coming to watch?” James asked to the group. “Obviously, when have I missed one,” you grinned up to him. You took pride in showing up to support him for his matches. He is your big brother, of course. “Who’re you playing?” Sirius questioned. “Ravenclaw,” James replied with a smirk.
“Pity, Sirius, that you got kicked off the team. You were probably the best beater we had, alongside Marlene,” you recalled. “I know, but I deserved it.,” Sirius groaned. A remorseful grin was evident on his face, recollecting the memory. “Of course, you deserved it after what you tried to do to Sev.” Lily had an angry frown on her face.
“Don’t know why you even hang out with that freak anyway,” Remus taunted. James joined the conversation again, “He’s pure evil.”
As Lily argued with the elder boys to defend her best friends name, you could feel eyes burning into the back of your head. You sat facing the Hufflepuff table, so the Ravenclaw and Slytherin tables were behind you. Glancing over your shoulder, you were encased in an uncomfortable sense of eye contact with Regulus Black himself. His eyes widened a little from their previous narrowed glare when yours connected but he glanced away just after.
The day had gone quickly. It was already noon, meaning it was time for Potions, seeing as it was a Wednesday. Marlene and you had headed together to class, arriving and taking your places at your own designated cauldrons. The black haired boy was already there.
“Have you started the next step?” You had asked, standing beside him and opening the textbook onto the right page again. “No, I need you to crush two lacewing flies.”
And, that’s how the rest of your potion classes with Regulus Black went. Just loitering alongside him and aimlessly following any instructions he would give you in silence. To your content, he hadn’t said anything patronising to you. But he hadn’t said anything to you, conversation wise either. That was, till the one today. You had been measuring out the bicorn horn, getting ready to crush it to a powder, when Regulus spoke up. “I’ve noticed how well Sirius and your little gang get along.”
You raised your head to look up at him with a ‘hm?’. “I’ve never saw him smile or laugh as much as he does with your lot in my entire life,” he continued. “Well, he is best friends with James,” you had piped up, slightly bemused on why he was bringing this up. He had refused to look at you, instead staring down into the brewing and bubbling potion. “Ah yes, I forgot about my replacement.” If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought he had a tinge of jealousy or resentment in his voice. Why would he be jealous?
“I wouldn’t call him a replacement. Sirius thinks highly of you, even if he doesn’t show it,” you had attempted to reassure him. This resulted in an irked scoff and finally, his eyes had met yours for the first time this whole class. “Thinks highly of me? That’s a proper joke. He doesn’t give a toss about me, seeing as he attempts to abandon me with our overbearing parents each Christmas and Summer. I’m sure he’s told you all about our loving mother.” His voice was edged with so much sarcasm and bitterness you could drown in it. His last words held a sardonic tone and made you feel tense. You didn’t know what to say, so you decided on not uttering a word.
It had been 2 days since your last conversation with Regulus Black. Luckily, it had been a Thursday, so you didn’t have to be in his grudgeful presence till Monday which was the last day anyway for this stupid project.
Once again, you had stolen James’ cloak, heading out after hours when all the prefects had already done their checks. It was your turn to watch over your potion. When Slughorn said that the students should look over their potions in the evenings, he probably didn’t intend to do it this late, but it was more fun like this. A twinge of excitement erupted in your chest thinking about it. You were nearly finished after weeks of begrudgingly stirring, chopping up and grinding ingredients and following orders.
Stepping soundlessly into the room, you crept over to the cauldron belonging to you and Regulus. You stirred the sludgy mixture with a tinge of disrelish, nearly gagging from how repulsive it was. You were unaware of the presence who joined you in the room mere minutes after; inching towards you, feet not making a squeak against the shadowy tiles.
After concluding that your assignment was going fine, you had turned to head back to the Gryffindor dorms. Your heart jumped and you let out a quiet, shocked gasp. A man stood behind you. Upon seeing his face, your shoulders relaxed and eyebrows twisted into a frown—although, not genuinely cross. The corners of his lips pricked up into a grin (which looked like he was attempting to conceal) before falling back to their normal, neutral position.
“Merlin, Black. Nearly gave me a heart attack there,” you lightly scolded. “Why’re you here? It’s my day to check.” He walked past you over to the cauldron, arms brushing and you felt a light rush of breeze. He was now standing to your right and you turned to face him once again as he spoke, “Couldn’t sleep. I decided to check on the potion, there isn’t much else to do in this bloody castle.”
You had replied with a mere ‘oh’. He gazed into the potion for a minute, then his eyes met yours. Embarrassingly, you scrambled to pick up your wand, then walked over to the door to grab the cloak that lay sprawled out on the floor.
“Are you in a rush?” His looming voice echoed through the room. You hesitated before replying, “No.” His next words had sprung some surprise in you, but you tried to not show it on your features; instead, aiming for a calm expression. “Would you like to go for a walk?”
After reluctantly contemplating the scenarios in your head of what he was trying to get at with this—possibly trying to attack you in a more secretive place, no one would catch him. No, that’s silly. If he wanted to attack you he would’ve already done it. Plus, he isn’t pure evil like ‘Snivellus’ Snape; and he would have no reason to ambush you—you agreed: “Alright.” His expression seemed to slightly change to a aplomb manner.
Following Regulus and sauntering through the halls together, some minutes in pure silence, some in light chatter, you both had managed to end up in the Hogwarts Astronomy Tower. The previously harsh wind settled to a leisurely breeze. Regulus had mimicked your actions, leaning against the metal railings of the tower. The whole atmosphere held a sort of serenity you felt that you’ve never experienced before; you were friends with the Marauders, of course, and nothing was ever tranquil with them boys.
Your gaze had flickered over to the boy beside you. His long, black hair was moving delicately in the zephyr. It reminded you of gentle waves moving through the ocean, but you then realised that was a silly comparison. You never really took your time to observe Regulus Black. His face was strongly chiselled—almost as if he was carved by that muggle, Michelangelo—elegant looking, really. He looked similar to Sirius, just younger and with his own distinctive characteristics.
Looking away as to not get caught staring like before, you realised you were both basking in silence for a few minutes. That was until you looked back to him and noticed Regulus’ dubious conscience to break it. Finally, he spoke. “I’m—Sorry for freaking out in potions the last day,” he blurted out in a weak whisper. “Wha-” I replied, confused for a second before speaking again—as so he didn’t feel sheepish. “. . It’s fine.”
‘Serenity.’ You could almost laugh if you were alone right now. How ironic, the thought of the once calm atmosphere being shrivelled up and thrown out like paper, replaced with this unbearably silent tension. “Sirius meant the world to me, growing up. He was like a hero, in my eyes,” Regulus’ voice was more clear now, and he let out an airy laugh in spite of himself. “Merlin, I don’t know why I’m telling you this, you don’t even want to—”
“No. It’s alright.” Your voice was firm, encouraging him to continue; and so he did. “I-We—We did everything. Now, he does it all with James. Wont even spare me a glance in the halls, during breakfast.” His voice trailed off and he went silent again.
His eyes haven’t met yours in a while and you were guessing they might’ve been glossy, and he’d have been embarrassed if they were. “Regulus. Your brother, Sirius. He loves you, so much more than you’d think. He just . . doesn’t express it well. He doesn’t know how to. It’s spiteful. He just feels different from you; always going on about how you’re the golden child and he’s the black sheep.” Black sheep of the Blacks. Ironic, yet again.
You both savoured the silence for a few minutes, settling on cherishing the midnight sky and how the starts shimmered like glitter. Regulus decided to change the topic, “Did you know, my family are all named after astrology, stars, constellations and all? Most, anyway; my ancestors must’ve been interested in sabaism.”
His appealing voice caught my attention and I turned to glance at him. “Really? Is Regulus one?” He adorned a small smile now. It was refreshing after being caught for days in his usual tempers. “Yes. My father’s called Orion. That’s a constellation. Sirius, the dog star. Orion’s dog.”
You listened attentively as he rambled on. “My cousin, Bellatrix, named after a star. Andromeda’s a constellation. I can go on further but we’d be here all night.” His silvery eyes shone in the night sky—it was majestic—and met yours, accompanied with a glowing smile on his sharp traits. You just returned the smile.
“You know, you’re quite alright, Potter.” This took you by surprise. Regulus Black (sort of) complimenting you? You’d have never thought the day would come. With a light laugh and smug but suppressed grin, you replied: “Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself, Black.” This persuaded a chuckle to slip past his pink lips. It was a deep, short laugh.
Letting a few more minutes pass up in the astronomy tower, you both had now agreed to head back to your common rooms. Now walking down the halls with the tips of your wands lighting the way, you had been making small talk with the boy.
How unexpected this whole situation was. If you had told yourself a week ago that you’d be wandering the halls past midnight with Regulus Arcturus Black, you would’ve been in disbelief.
James’ invisibility cloak was draped casually around your shoulders. The pale moonlight shone through the windows of the castle, painting streaks across Regulus and your faces’ each time passing one.
“You know,” you paused for a minute before continuing. “You’re welcome to stay with my family and I over Christmas.” You noticed the conflicted look on his face upon hearing your words, but nevertheless, kept talking. “I’m sure my parents won’t mind. James has Remus over each year, and Sirius when he can. You’d be able to spend more time with your brother.”
He let out a mockingly amused snigger. “I think my parents would go mental if they found out both their heirs have gone rebel.” You let out a small giggle with this but then your lips settled to a gentle, closed smile. Regulus seemed to mirror your actions and you had settled into a comfortable silence again.
Till, of course, that was broken once again. But this time, not by you nor Regulus. “Who’s there?” A gruff voice echoed behind you both from past the corner of the long corridor. Shit! You had completely forgotten about Filch. Giving Regulus a panicked look—to which he shot straight back—you quickly whispered: “Nox,” and extinguished the light from your wand. Regulus had done the same so now you were both lost in the dark halls of Hogwarts, only having the blue-toned moonlight as a source to see as it glimmered off your silver bracelet.
Unexpectedly, the cloak was stripped from your shoulders, leaving a slightly cold breeze in its place. “What are you—” You whisper-screamed to Regulus but you were interrupted when his dainty fingers wrapped around your face, his palm covering your mouth.
He gave you a stern look, as if to say, ‘just shut up and trust me,’ and so you did. He threw the cloak across the two of you, backing you up against the wall (nearly knocking a painting down in the process).
Under the cloak, it was darker than before and quite stuffy. You had never shared the cloak with someone else like the Marauders did, so you weren’t used to this. Your hands reached up and removed the hand splayed across your lips. Your position was also uncomfortable, being pressed up against the wall with Regulus towering over you. It seemed like all your senses were heightened.
One arm was just above your head, holding himself up and he brought the other in between you both to hold up his wand. “Lumos,” he said in a sotto voice. The light was dimmer than usual but lit up between both your faces.
Footsteps approached. Filch was drawing nearer and nearer. Your eyes connected to his and in this lighting, you had realised how small the proximity between you really was, causing a small pink to tint your cheeks. It seems as he noticed too, as the sharp corners of his cheekbones were softened by a dull rouge.
It was as if you were inspecting him under a microscope. All his features were so close to your reach; all displayed right in front of your eyes. Eyes. His had a thin lining of artic blue around his pupils which you only discovered by being this close to him. They stared right back at you and you felt the blush crawl all through the back of your neck and hung high on your cheeks. “What are you gawping at?” His tone was soft yet also appeared harsh. Guess he’s still the same Regulus. “Sorry.”
Merlin, time drove so slowly when you were waiting for it to go. You felt hot and self-conscious under Regulus’ gaze, but attempted to shrug it off. I’m sure he’s just as embarrassed of this situation as you felt. Thinking back to what you said earlier, elegant was an understatement; this boy was angelic.
After what felt like forever, Filch finally came creeping down the corridor. Your body made sure you were aware of your heightened rubatosis as Filch drew closer. Regulus and you had waited with baited breath as he passed. Your eyes followed Filch from behind Regulus but it seems his never left you. Luckily, he didn’t suspect nor notice you two at all—well, how could he when you were both under the invisibility cloak.
Once he had turned the corner, both of you had collectively let out a sigh (one you didn’t even know you were holding in). Regulus had waited a small bit longer—probably just incase Filch comes back—and then stepped away from you. The invisibility cloak fell to your feet, and you hesitantly disconnected the eye contact to pick it up. You were sure your cheeks were still rosy as you could feel the heat still burning from them.
The rest of the journey back was glazed over with a tense, suffocating silence. You didn’t know what to say after that and you doubt Regulus did either. Eventually, you had reached the changing staircases. “Goodnight,” you bid him goodbye as you treaded up the stairs to Gryffindor’s common room.
Turning your back away from him and following up the staircase, you had heard a small ‘goodnight’ come from Regulus. That night you had went to bed with ruddy cheeks and a buzzing in your stomach.
It was the day that your potion assignment was due and frankly, you were quite nervous about it. You had desperately hoped you’d get a good grade, seeing as you really had tried with this project, and the amount of time spent on it.
Marlene walked alongside you out of Transfiguration. “Godric, Professor McGonagall really has it out for me,” she complained, her brows furrowed and whiny. “What makes you think that?” Your blonde friend had nearly answered before you even questioned her, “She always gets cross when something goes wrong for me, but she just loves bloody Dirk Cresswell. Never gives out to him,” she sneered. You both made your way to the Potions classroom. “Think it’s because I’m half-blood.”
You let out a defeated sigh, “Marlene, you do realise Professor McGonagall is half-blood too . .” Her annoyed expression fell and Marlene just replied with an ‘oh’.
Slughorn was now going through the room, grading each potion. You heard a couple ‘acceptable’s, two ‘exceeds expectations,’ one ‘outstanding’ and even three ‘poor’s. Once your potion was graded, you were dismissed from the class.
You waited anxiously with Regulus standing beside you. Neither of you had said anything yet; you were far too nervous to, and still a little embarrassed from the other night. You would’ve hated to have spent 3 weeks on this just for it to turn out to be shit.
At long last, Professor Slughorn stood infront of you both, peering into the small cauldron. “Outstanding, Miss Potter and Mister Black. Well done, you’re both dismissed.”
Your lips twisted into a proud grin, but you puffed out a small flow of air, trying to keep the grin in that just grew wider. Following Slughorn’s orders, you had rushed out of the classroom and headed a little down the halls from the class.
“Wait, Potter,” you heard in that oh-so-familiar voice. Turning around, you faced Regulus Black with a wide smirk. “Yes, Black?” He swiftly caught up to you, towering over in front of you again. “I just wanted to say, good job. Wouldn’t mind working with you again, as partners.” He let a smug grin adorn his lips. “Thanks. That wouldn’t be too bad, I suppose.” You flashed him a pearly-white smile, before turning back and continuing to walk down the halls.
It had been a few weeks since you were graded in potions and much to your content, Regulus Black and you had grown closer. You would even dare call yourself friends with the boy. Your brother was a little skeptical about the friendship—as well as Sirius, and the other two Marauders too—but you assured them it was fine.
Speaking of Sirius, his birthday had passed and Lily, James, Remus, Peter and you had arranged a little ‘Sweet-Sixteen’ birthday for him. It was a fun little get together, only consisting of a few friends.
The cool breeze flowed gently through your hair. “You know, I don’t really see why you’re friends with all them horrid boys. Like seriously, Barty Crouch, Evan Rosier, even Snape. Cop on, Black.” You both sat on the course ground of the Astronomy Tower. He let out a breathy laugh, “You think I’m friends with Snape? Not even people in my house like Snape. His only friends are Mulciber and Lily Evans.”
He continued to talk, defending his friends, “and, who do you suppose I be friends with? Xenophilius Lovegood? He’s an odd one.” You let out a strong laugh, tossing your head back before looking to Regulus. Regulus smiled back at you as you laughed. “Poor guy, he’s quite nice actually,” you backed up the Ravenclaw boy.
“Yes! Come on, James!” You screamed, throwing your arms up in celebration as your older brother threw the quaffle into a hoop, marking his third goal for Gryffindor. You didn’t mind all the judging looks you earned.
Gryffindor was currently in the lead against Slytherin thanks to James. The commentators voice boomed through the air as each player whizzed past, doing their part for the team.
“And another ten points for Gryffindor!” The crowed around you roared, cheering proudly for their team. “If we keep this up,” Lily said, “we’ll be in the final in no time.” You just nodded to her, eyes still following the quaffle being passed around.
Twenty minutes passed, Slytherin had scored two goals and Gryffindor, one. “What’s that?” The commentator asked rhetorically, “Regulus Black, Slytherin’s seeker has just secured their win, catching the Golden Snitch!” Once again, the Gryffindor crowd went wild, everyone being shocked seeing as how well we had this in our grasp.
Although you were from Gryffindor, you were still just as happy for Regulus being able to win the match. You would’ve even cheered for him—like you do when he’s not playing your team—but you probably would’ve gotten disowned from your own house.
‘James isn’t going to be happy with this,’ you thought. You made your way down and back to the castle, waiting for James and the rest of the boys in the Gryffindor common room.
After waiting for fifteen minutes, they all trudged in, tired and grumpy. You walked over to your brother. “Well done, James! You played so well, tough luck though,” you smiled to him, hoping he wasn’t in too much of a mood. “Thanks,” he ruffled your hair with his sweaty palm, grumbling the reply. “Merlin, you’re so sweaty. Get off me!” You playfully shoved him away, earning a grin from him.
You headed out from the common room and made your way through the halls. Eventually, you reached the Slytherin common room. Leaning against the wall beside the door, you were waiting for someone to head in or come out so you could ask for Regulus.
It took a couple minutes before you spotted Evan Rosier coming your way. “Rosier! Perfect,” you exclaimed as he walked up to the door. “What are you doing here?” His voice was cold but it didn’t seem intentional, instead genuinely asking why. “Would you do me a favor and get Regulus, please?”
He waited for a minute and contemplated his options. “He’s probably fairly busy with his win. But if I do?” You rolled your eyes. Merlin, are all Slytherins so greedy? “Really?” You puffed out a sigh, “I’ll . . do your Ancient Runes homework.” “Deal,” he replied with a grin, “Thanks Potter.”
The blonde headed into the common room and later returned with the dark headed boy a couple minutes after. Regulus wandered out past the door and you stepped up to greet him, Rosier heading back into the room.
“Reg!” You smiled to him, gaining one back. “Well done. I can’t believe you managed that, we were going so well.” You folded your arms across your chest and stood in front of him. “What can I say? Being a great seeker just runs in my blood.” That bit was quite true; his cousin, Narcissa Black was Slytherin’s best seeker, your generation was say so anyway.
“Oh, shut up, you snob,” you giggled. He just held a content smile on his face. “Also . . I have a proposal,” you started. His eyebrow quirked up suspiciously at this, “I’m not sure I should be scared or not.” You flashed a beaming smile again. “No, no. It’s not anything bad,” you reassured him.
He listened contently as your proposed your idea, “I was wondering . . if you’d be able to convince your parents to let you stay at Hogwarts during Christmas break? We could hang out more and you wouldn’t have to put up with them. ” You bit your lip anxiously as you waited to hear what he had to say. His expression didn’t reveal his reactions at all. It was nerve wracking.
He scratched the back of his head, furrowing his brows a little with an unsure smile, “Uh, I’m not sure if they’d let me.” Your face must’ve fell because his eyes widened a little and he quickly spoke again. “Not that I don’t want to—of course. I’ll still ask,” he smiled at you, trying to reassure you he wanted to stay too. “I’ll tell them there’s going to be extra quidditch practices and I need to stay.”
You smiled at him gratefully. “Thanks, Reg. You don’t have to if you don’t want to, you know.”“No, I do,” he quickly shot back. “No promises though.” You just chuckled, “Alright.”
And so, you spent Christmas break at Hogwarts with Regulus Black, instead of returning home with James, Remus and Sirius.
This was your first time spending Christmas at Hogwarts; there was barely anyone there. You noticed how empty the halls were compared to normal. It was nice though, calming.
The dull winter light shone through the windows of your dorm. It was extremely quiet. You didn’t think you’d miss how loud the girls would be in the mornings till you woke up alone in your dorm room.
It wasn’t long till you were dressed in your own clothes, happy that you had an occasion for not wearing your robes, and ready to head to the Great Halls. Upon arriving, you had realised that you were one of three students in Gryffindor who stayed at Hogwarts (or atleast, was awake and getting breakfast at the Hall).
You sat down at your house table and placed a slice of toast on your plate. The bench creaked as someone sat beside you. Looking up while taking a bite from your toast, you smiled, seeing Regulus sit beside you. “Morning, Reg.”
He greeted you back, grabbing some food for himself and placing it onto his plate. “This is the Gryffindor table. If one of your Slytherins saw you here, they’d never let this go,” you teased. He just shoved you playfully before stuffing a slice of toast in his mouth. “Not very prim and proper for a Black.” You let out a small giggle as he gave you a sidelong glance.
After making light chat to your Slytherin friend, it was a couple hours later now and you had been granted permission to head to Hogsmeade.
The ground was littered with light snow and it looked like a pristine, white blanket from a bird’s eye view. Your arms were wrapped around Regulus’ waist and your head lay gently on his back shoulder, peering down at the ground as you giggled and marvelled at everything. Regulus wasn’t talking much but, neither were you, instead being too busy gazing at the forests and rivers down below.
You landed down just a few metres away from Hogsmeade, Regulus letting you off the broomstick first before getting off himself. “That was fun,” you smiled. You weren’t used to riding your broomstick much, seeing as you don’t play quidditch so you didn’t have much use of it. “Yeah.”
The snow was crunchy under your boots as you both strolled into the High Street of Hogsmeade. “I need to get some things,” you told the boy, “I’ll catch you later. I’ll meet you at the Three Broomsticks.” He just nodded, carrying his broom by his side. “Alright. Half an hour sound good?”
Regulus went on his way as you trotted down to Honeydukes. You weren’t sure what to get everyone as gifts so you decided upon this. You already bought James a new quidditch set as the one at home was all battered and bruised up. You had bought Sirius some new cologne he had been talking about—that you assumed he only wanted because Remus had complimented it a while back—and you had got Remus a few books about magical creatures. Peter would like a box of chocolate frogs from Honeydukes, seeing as they were his favourite.
You had also got things for Lily, Marlene and the other girls. But you just couldn’t decide what to get Regulus. You decided to leave it and that you’d figure something out.
Honeydukes was a cosy little shop located in the centre of Hogsmeade. You entered the shop, alerting the shopkeeper with a small ring from the bell. Rows and rows of sweets were piled up all the way to the ceiling on teal-turquoise shelves. This really was a sweet tooth’s heaven.
“Ah, Miss Potter, how can I assist you?” The shopkeeper greeted. “Hello!” You sent him a charming smile, “Could I get a box of chocolate frogs, please.” The shopkeeper was lovely, helping you and even wrapping it up for you in a delicate, silver wrapping paper. You thanked him on your way out.
Now, time to find Regulus something. You wandered through Hogsmeade till you approached a shop supplied with quidditch items. Peering through the window, the newly released, Nimbus 1009 laying gleaming in its spot. A new broom, of course! You knew that being a Black meant he could probably afford as many of these as he’d like, but it’s the thought that counts.
It had now been half an hour since you last saw Regulus and you sat alone at a wooden table by the fireplace, sipping away at your butterbeer. A small bell jingled as people entered and your head raised, waiting for Regulus to come. You’d already bought a butterbeer for him, and it sat longingly across from you on the table.
Once again, the bell had rung. In entered your friend, taking a seat across from you. “Finally,” you huffed, “took you long enough. We said half an hour.” He rolled his eyes and grinned, taking a swing from the drink in front of him. A small cream moustache lay across the top of his lips till he licked them, then spoke, “Oh shush. I’m only five minutes past, thanks for this.” He gestured to the butterbeer, drinking some more.
After finishing your beverages, you and Regulus had headed back to Hogwarts. Regulus had flown you both back on his broomstick once again and you were back in no time; flying was much quicker than taking the path over to Hogwarts.
You woke up, rubbing your eyes and yawning—still slightly tired. Then you shot up from your bed. It’s Christmas! You hurriedly ran to get changed and rushed down to the great hall.
Regulus was already seated at the Slytherin table. Once he spotted you, a friendly smile broke out alone his features. You were quick to fire one back, darting over to where he sat. You plunked down across from the boy.
“Merry Christmas, Reg!” You cheered, feeling giggly and excited. “Happy Christmas,” he smirked back. He looked far more posh today than normal. His jet-black hair was swept back with more gel and he held a more presentable, Black family look today—if that makes sense.
You both shared light conversation over breakfast, agreeing to share presents tonight at the astronomy tower. You both had received letters and gifts from family, opening them together at the dining table. The whole day was spent with Regulus, but you didn’t mind, you enjoyed his company. ‘It’s so strange how I once thought he was an absolute prick—not even too long ago as well,’ you thought to yourself.
It was now half-past eight and Regulus was waiting for you on the astronomy tower, leaning on the rails holding a small box in his hands. You reached the top of the tower, finding Regulus standing which his back to you.
You walked up to him, the broom clasped behind your back—trying to conceal it, but that’s a bit hard seeing as it’s a whole broomstick. “Reguluss,” you purred, catching the attention of the boy. He turned around with a grin and you could say you were equally as excited as him. He also held something behind his back with one hand, not letting you see it.
“Open yours first,” you smiled, handing over the present to him. It was quite obvious what you got him. You weren’t the best gift wrapper. “I wonder what it is,” he sardonically chuckled, unwrapping it and seeing that it was the newly released broom.
His eyes met yours and his smile stretched up to the bottom of his cheeks. “Thank you, shit, I didn’t expect this one. This is brand new, Merlin’s beard, not even my parents would buy me something like this.” You smiled at him and he placed the broom to the ground before scurrying forwards, coming towards you.
You weren’t sure what he was doing till his arms wrapped around your waist and he spun you around. You gripped his shoulders, looking into his eyes. “Regulus! Put me down,” you giggled loudly.
After spinning you lightly, he placed you down, keeping one hand still on your waist—which made your cheeks heat up, but it wasn’t noticeable in the dim lighting—but bringing the other between you. On his palm, a small, forest green box. “For you, m’lady.” He held a small grin on his face, and you just let out an airy laugh at him. “Thank you, good sir,” you replied, picking up the box.
Unwrapping the thin golden ribbon around it, inside the box revealed a silver necklace, a charm on it that read your name. “Regulus . .” you marvelled at it, taking it out from the box. “It’s gorgeous.”
He smiled gently at you, taking it from your grasp and walking around you. You eyed him as he passed, feeling his presence right behind you. “Can you move your hair?” He asked, and you pulled it together and held it to the side as he wrapped the necklace around your neck with delicate hands.
“Thank you,” you murmured, a faint blush on your cheeks upon feeling his hand brush the rear of your neck. The stroke of his fingers sent goosebumps tingling down your spine. A strange eruption of tickles could be felt in your stomach, like butterflies.
He stood behind you for a moment before you turned around to face him, showing the necklace sitting high upon your collarbones. Your cheeks were still pink, you knew as you could feel the slight burn of them.
The distance between you both was thin, you could faintly feel his breaths. His icey, storm grey eyes peered down at you, flickering along the plains of your face. You felt small under his brooding stare.
He looked like he was conflicted, eyes switching from your eyes to down your face. You matched his actions unconsciously.
Before you knew it, Regulus leaned in, closing the gap between the both of you. Subconsciously, you closed your eyes and mirrored his actions. You felt his lips graze yours lightly, not fully touching. Oh, them lips. How soft and plump they felt.
And then, he pressed them against yours. It felt magical (which is ironic, considering you were living in the Wizarding World). Your lips moved in sync. Regulus’ other hand moved to hold the opposite side of your waist, pulling you a little closer to him.
Your hands flew up to place themselves on top of his chest. After a few more kisses, you pushed away, gasping for air but trying not to show it. “Reg—” You started but was quickly cut off by him. “Don’t say anything. I’m sorry,” your eyebrows furrowed at the boy but he wasn’t looking, instead looking down at his shoes.
“I shouldn’t done that.” One hand was brought up to his mouth and he slid his fingers across his lips, wiping them off. “Wha—What?” You asked. “No, it’s alright,” you assured him. “I . . . I liked it.” Your fingers fidgeted behind your back and as soon as his stormy eyes, whipped up to meet yours, you sent him a small, closed smile.
It was only now that you had finally realised how you felt about the boy. The way your heart fluttered every time he smiled at you. The delicious ache in your chest you got every time you laughed with him or he laughed because of you. You’d fallen for Regulus Black—and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
The proximity between you two had decreased as you stepped closer to him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, fingers settling to play with the baby hairs at the nape of his neck. You placed a gentle kiss on his lips once again; then one on each side of the corner of his lips. They twisted into a grin. But not a mischievous one, this time, an endearing one that made your stomach flutter.
Everything going on at this moment made your stomach flutter. “Would you . . . want to be my girlfriend?” Hesitation was evident in his voice. You could almost giggle at how cute you thought he was when he was shy. “Of course, Regulus.” You both shared a smile and the corner of his eyes crinkled.
This time, you leaned forward, initiating the kiss. Your mouths slotted together and his hands slid further across your waist till you were completely in his arms. It was obvious, feeling him grin against you with your lips pressed together and next thing you knew, you were being spun around, causing you to erupt into a fit of giggles.
It was now coming towards the end of June. Christmas break was now long past and you and Regulus had been going out for almost six months. You didn’t bother keeping it a secret, and Regulus’ pals didn’t mind so much—only considering you were pure-blooded. Not keeping it hidden doesn’t mean you went prancing around letting everyone know. Also, it doesn’t mean you wanted Sirius to find out on his own . .
You were sitting in the Gryffindor common room one night. The girls had already gone off to bed but you decided to stay up a little bit longer with your brother and his friends.
Of course, Peter had already gone to bed as well as Remus leaving shortly after. They were so preoccupied with their exams and having good sleep for them. But, they were doing their O.W.L.s, so you understand why they were so stressed and pressured to do well. Sirius never bothered with exams, so he didn’t mind staying up. Naturally, he dragged James along with him to stay in the common room.
You lay, sprawled across the couch, legs sitting on top of Sirius’ and James stood by the fireplace. You were getting tired. Your eyelids struggling to keep themselves open in the cosy heat the fire provided.
That was till Sirius blurted out: “Are you shagging my brother?” As if it meant nothing. James’ head whipped over to look at Sirius as fast as yours did. Eyes blown wide and mouth gone dry all of a sudden, you stumbled over a response. “I—What.” Your cheeks were scarlet red and burning with embarrassment.
“You heard what I said,” Sirius shrugged nonchalantly. “Sirius! No, I’m not.” James hadn’t said a word, still staring at Sirius with a gaping expression. “Are you snogging Regulus?” He continued to pry with these personal questions.
You moved your legs off him, sitting up on the sofa and wrapping your arms around your knees, burying your head into your the crevice between them both. “Uhm . . . yeah,” you managed to squeak out.
Unfortunately, Sirius didn’t quite catch that, asking you to repeat yourself. “Yeah. Merlin’s beard, I was gonna tell you.” You ran your hands down your face with a discontent huff. “I’m not mad.” Sirius let out an amused laugh.
You peaked one eye past two fingers, looking at the dark haired boy. He held an entertained grin. Lowering your hands, you looked over to James who happened to have the exact same smirk plastered on his face. “Can’t believe you’ve snogged someone before our Moony,” James sniggered. “Oh, shut it.” Even though there was a slight harsh tone to your words, you sent the two boys a smirk.
“How fascinating!” You beamed at your boyfriend, lying on a slightly-damp, patch of grass as he flew not too high above you, using the broom you had gotten him. “Your birthday also happens to be our 6 month anniversary. That’s half a year!” It was two days before Regulus’ birthday.
He replied with a small chuckle. “Pity, I wont be able to see you for either,” you frowned slightly. Regulus returned to the ground, taking a seat beside you and relaxing back. “I know,” said Regulus, “but there’s nothing we can do.” You sighed, “Yeah, I guess so.”
Regulus’ birthday arrived. You hid a small, navy blue box under your bed so the other girls wouldn’t pry and nosy about. Finally, you were able to give him his present which excited you, hoping he’d like it as much as you anticipated.
And now it was time. You both decided to meet at your usual spot, the Astronomy Tower. You arrived first, waiting not too long for Regulus to show. You scurried over to him, meeting in the middle.
“Happy birthday, Reg!” You greeted him (for the tenth time today). You smiled brightly, the outer area of your eyes crinkling gently. “Thank you, doll.” The nickname made your stomach flutter delectably.
The box in your hands was brought out in front of you for him to see. He smiled to you, taking it from your hands and placing a tender kiss to your lips. “What’s this?” He asked, in which you replied: “Open it.”
He carefully took apart the bow you had done in it, lifting the lid off the box. Inside, a jar of green, shimmery powder was placed. Regulus reached his pale hands into the box, plucking the jar from it. “Floo powder,” grinned Regulus. You weren’t sure what to make of his reaction.
“It’s so—so you can see me during summer. And get away from your family, and do what you want with it, of course.” You stumbled over your words nervously and the black-haired boy placed a peck on your temple. “I know,” he said languidly, “thanks, sweets.” Another pet name he used frequently.
His dainty fingers lifted your chin up, pulling you into him and smirking against your lips. He kissed you gently, backed off after one kiss, then leaned in again, trying to get as close to you as possible. His arms wrapped around your waist, yours pulling at his hair gingerly.
You were both practically devouring each other, not even bothering to separate for air. You accidentally tugged hard, eliciting a guttural groan from Regulus. “‘m sorry,” you mumbled, lips still grazing his. He pushed further into your face, connecting them once again.
Finally, he pulled away again. Your noses were still abrading against each other and lips softly touching as well. “I have something for you,” he whispered against your mouth, breath coming out in small puffs.
You pulled away fully now, holding onto his shoulders. He brought out his wand with one hand, muttering an ‘accio’ but you didn’t hear what he was summoning.
A petite bouquet of blood red roses and pristine white baby breath came to his clutch and he handed them over to you. “It’s . . ehm, red because your Gryffindor, and the leaves—I guess, are green. Like Slytherin.” He chuckled nervously, hand immediately going to scratch the rear of his head once you took the flowers from his grip.
Before smiling at him, you took a whiff of the flowers. They smelled gorgeous and light. “Thank you, Reg.” You leaned onto your tippy toes and gave him a peck on each cheek, then a prolonged kiss to his lips.
Summer days drifted away with the wind. It had already been two weeks into your holidays. Regulus has visited you once so far, you both going on a walk through a muggle park. He sends letters regularly. They always came sealed with a family crest stamp, and written in elegant handwriting with obsidian-coloured ink.
You wrote back as well, sealing the end of each letter with a lipstick mark (partly because you wanted to be romantic, partly because you thought it looked nice). He promised to visit you soon, and soon would be today.
The both of you were now in your bedroom. Regulus was laying down on your bed, and you were atop of him. Your mouths fit like jigsaws and your tongues danced gracefully. Silent moans slipped from each others lips every once in a while. It was bliss, you thought. His hands were placed on your waist, sliding up and down it gently, causing your shirt to ride up slightly in unison.
Three booming knocks came to your door and you heard James scream your name from outside the oak wood. Your eyes shot open and you scrambled off your boyfriend. “Shit.” An alarmed expression lay on his sharp features and you wish you had time to laugh at him. He hurried over to your wardrobe, trying to shove himself into the cramped space. You stifled a giggle at him and shut the door for him.
“What?” You rolled your eyes at James standing at your door, giving him a harsh glare. “Where. Is. My. Invisibility. Cloak?” He interrogated—or more so, demanded. You pushed your palm to greet your forehead, sighing heavily. With an irritated tone, you replied, “I don’t know, James. You used it last, idiot.”
He groaned, storming back over to your door. “Fine. But if you use it without asking, I—you’ll pay,” grumbled James. “You only use it to sneak out to go drinking every once in a while. Don’t blame me again, or I might just snitch on you,” you sneered. James just sent you a look, slamming the door on the way out.
“Merlin, what a cunt.” Your mood was instantly switched when you looked over to the wardrobe. “Regulus, you can come out.” Muffled words were coming from the wardrobe and you burst out laughing upon realising he was trapped in. You let him out, of course, but only after a couple laughs.
That was the peak. After that event, all went down hill. A week following Regulus’ visit, Sirius had burst into your home, looking wrecked and in disarray. He explained to James that he ran away from home. They were pressuring him to follow a path he didn’t want to walk along. Your family (including yourself aswell,) welcomed him in with open arms.
Regulus’ letters slowed and they held a sort of edge to them that you couldn’t explain. He also hadn’t used the floo powder you gifted him to visit you. You speculated his parents might’ve found it and confiscated it, but there was no evidence for that.
But when you returned to school for your sixth year, nothing felt the same. And nothing would feel the same again. The war had caused a split between people. Most older Slytherins had joined the Dark Lord, bearing a mark on their arm to show their loyalties.
The first time you saw Regulus was at King’s Cross. You boarded the train with your brother, Remus, Sirius and Peter. Watching all the new first years bid farewell to their parents, your eyes scanned across the crowds of people.
Eventually, they landed on Regulus and the Blacks walking over to the train. He bared a stoic look with his parents. His face looking paler and sharper than ever. They didn’t say much to each other upon his departure.
Once you arrived at Hogwarts, you were too busy unpacking and greeting the girls to find Regulus yet. It wasn’t long till you were able to, sharing potions class again this year. The time whizzed by, and now you stood outside the classroom, waiting for your boyfriend to exit as well.
You noticed him walk out the doors. He immediately tensed when he noticed you standing there. “Regulus.” You tried to send him a comforting smile, but it was so hard these days with everything going on around you. “Hello, doll.” The name still made your chest squeeze and brought a push of confidence in you.
You were shocked to find out how cold he seemed this year. You hadn’t expected the drastic change in his behaviour, even towards you. But you attempted to ignore it, and the slight pit you felt in your stomach upon noticing it.
Over the months, your relationship with Regulus morphed into . . . a routine. Something that consisted of arguing, making up, then saying goodbye to each other without any other conversation. Your chats weren’t filled with laughter and smiles like they used to, instead replaced with this. He did seem to be trying to return to the old Regulus you had known, just struggling.
Your last straw was one unfortunate, February night. “I’m so sick of this! Regulus. Look at me!” You were screaming out at him on top of the Astronomy Tower, your usual hangout spot.
His grey eyes met yours, furrowed angrily and slightly glazed over. Rivers of tears were already running from yours and the skin around them was red and puffed up. “You’ve changed. And I want to help you, but you’re not letting me.” The distance between you both was slim.
You rubbed your eyes, your mind attempting to tear your hands off to prevent making them even more red and sore. At your disbelief, he took a step forward, wrapping his arms around your waist. Your arms crept around his shoulders, head buried in the crook of his neck and soaking his shirt with tears. This felt faintly familiar.
“I’m sorry, doll,” he whispered in your ear. Not moving from that position, you both stood their, relishing in each other’s presence. Aside from every other argument that happened this year, this one felt different. You felt like he might actually be coming back to you. “I love you, Regulus. But I need you to return to me,” you sniffled through weak sobs. “I love you too.”
In that moment, you felt happy. This was your Regulus. The one you had grown so fond over.
But happiness can only last for so long, right?
He pushed you back slightly, looking into your eyes. Under the dim moonlight, two small remnants of streams from his tears lay down his cheeks. His hand clutched your cheek, rubbing a soft circle with his thumb. “I—I have something to show you.”
All of a sudden, guilt and shame took over his features. He pulled his arm away from your face, using it to uncover his sleeve on the opposite arm. His skin. His pale, soft, smooth, oh lovely skin, was flawed and a Dark Mark was engraved in it. A skull and a snake in black markings.
A choked out sob forced itself from the depths of your throat. A pit formed in your stomach and you shoved him back, away from you. “I—” He started, but you shouted over him. “Don’t. No. I will . . I will not stand to be with a Death Eater.”
He called your name, pleading. The only colour on his face was the burning red of his puffy eyes. “Please . . I didn’t—”
“I’m sorry Regulus.” You were sobbing now, trying to control your shuddering words. “I won’t do it. I never thought you had it in you.” Your words were laced with venom. Each one you spat felt as if you dug a knife further into the pit in your stomach. “Please! You don’t understand,” he strained. “I ha—”
“We’re done.” He didn’t say anything else. Instead, he just stared into your eyes longingly.
That was a month ago. Now, your entire relationship with Regulus, the walls he held up that you took time breaking down, were now rebuilt and more durable than ever. Whenever you saw him in potions class, or in the halls, or even during meals, most time he’d be staring at you with guilt-filled eyes.
You felt aches each time you noticed his glances, but not the aches you used to love; this time they were sore, painful, heart-aches. But you tried to push through them.
Of course, you still loved him. It was hard trying not to. But you managed to slowly distance yourself from your feelings and continue the mundane routine of being a Hogwarts student.
Your brother, Sirius, Remus, and surprisingly, even Peter had all felt the change in your attitude. Not only had Regulus turned into a hollow shell of himself, but your split had also morphed you into a duller, less joyful version of yourself. It wasn’t shocking, that that would happen. Regulus was everything to you. He was what made you enjoy your classes so much, enjoy going doing to Hogsmeade, enjoy sneaking out past curfew. Now all them memories were just . . memories. Memories that you needed to forget.
Eventually, you had managed to overcome this downfall in your life. Stepping over it and being able to return to your old self. Not constantly thinking of the boy. Happy, old you, who hadn’t a notion Regulus even existed; only knowing him as ‘Sirius’ cold, younger brother.’ But oh, how much your heart used to ache everytime Sirius entered the common room with a playful grin on his face. He reminded you so much of when Regulus used to smile at you with twinkling eyes.
The wind was chilled, blowing softly through strands of your hair. You were sitting by the edge of the astronomy tower, leaning on the rail that stood strong in front of you. The floor you sat on was frozen cold under your fingertips.
Often times, you came up here and just sat on the ledge of the rails. You liked to watch the stars when you couldn’t sleep. It calmed you, seeing as there was a war going on around you, as well as just calming any anxieties you had.
To your luck, each time you came up here, you never stumbled across a certain boy you were wanting to avoid. Speaking of . . Regulus, you had noticed he tended to disappear recently. The Slytherins were always acting mysterious, going off places, missing classes. You had a suspicion on what they were doing but, you can’t just accuse people of that.
You sighed, it was getting late and you were already too deep into your thoughts. You really should be focusing more of your time on studying for the end-of-year exams, not wasting it up here, drowning in your thoughts.
Rising from your spot, your hands were gritty from sitting on the stone. You wiped them off on your clothes before turning around and walking over to the stairs. At the top of the stairs stood a figure. Regulus stood two steps ahead of you.
His eyes were red and he made no attempt to hide it. It was silent for a moment. He then broke the silence by calling out your name. “Regulus,” you replied, voice cracking slightly. Fuck. You really did think you were over him, but now here he was in front of you again and you were already about to keel and cry.
“What do you want?” Your voice was harsh, full of bite. It was a pitiful attempt to push back your tears and replace them with anger. But you weren’t crying yet; you were merely teary-eyed.
“I’m so sorry, my love. I know you don’t want to talk to me, and I only did what you wanted. But we must now.” Your eyebrows furrowed in both confusion and resentment towards the boy. ‘What is he talking about?’ You thought. You stayed silent, letting him continue, to which he took the hint. “I—I needed to see you one last time.” One last time? He was starting to worry you. Your expression turned from one of bitterness to one full of anxiety. “Reg, what are you talking about?” Your voice was strained.
He stepped towards you, taking your shoulders between both hands. Instead of being warm and comforting like you last remembered, they were now as cold as tiles. “You need to listen to me,” you nodded your head as he spoke, “I’ve defected the Dark Lord.”
“What?” You felt as if you were out of breath, panting as he towered over you. “I never wanted to join them. My parents, they pressured me into doing it—becoming a Death Eater. That’s why Sirius ran. That’s why he ran. But I’m not strong, like him. I couldn’t abandon them, so I joined. But it’s gone too far. He’s attacking hundreds of families. It’s not right.” His eyes were gloomy and seemed a darker, thundery grey in this lighting. “Regulus-”
He cut you off, “No. No, just listen. The Order would never trust me, so I’ve found a way to help. They wont know but I have to do something.” This time, you cut him off, holding onto his forearms, “I don’t—what are you saying, Regulus.” Merlin, the tears were flowing down your face already.
He sighed sorrowfully. “I’m leaving tomorrow. Voldemort—he,” he looked away from you. “Look, I found out about a scheme he has. I intend to end it. Attempting this will cost me my life, doll. I’m so sorry, for everything I’ve done. I just need to have you one last time.”
You looked deep into his eyes, his into yours. Long floods of tears streamed from your eyes but you didn’t do anything to stop them now. Regulus leaned in and kissed you. You let him, kissing back equally as harsh.
He pulled away, tears falling from his gorgeous grey eyes. “I love you, I always have and I always will.” “I love you too,” you weakly replied. Your foreheads connected, noses touching and lips curling into each other. You kissed him once again. Passionate and desirable; as if you would never see him again, but that seemed to be the truth.
That night when Regulus left, you fell to your knees, creating small cuts in your smooth skin, breaking blood. It was the last time you saw Regulus black.
After that treacherous night, Regulus went missing from school. Whispers around school started. People spreading around that he was ‘murdered by Voldemort’ or ‘killed by one of the Death Eaters for cowardly betraying them’. You constantly had searched for them stormy blue-grey eyes in the corridors, looking desperately for them on the Slytherin table, laughing with Evan Rosier, but to no avail. He was gone—presumed dead, the Order had said—and the pit in your stomach since that night remained as you packed your belongings, ready to return home for summer break. Fiddling with the last thing you had to remember him by, the dainty silver necklace he gave you on the day you two got together.
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