#student jimin

[darkjimxn]

Chapter 3: Stalker [M]

Summary: “A manwhore and a junkie… it’s a match made in heaven.”

Pairing: Park Jimin x Reader

Genre: High School au, angst

Word Count: 7.4k

Warnings: 18+, substance use disorder/drug addiction, PTSD, child abuse, sexual content (not explicit), additional warnings might be added as story progresses.

A/N: Sorry for taking so long to update, my motivation has just been so bad because of uni. And now with exams coming up, I can't really promise anything, but after my exams are over I'll definitely be more active!

“God, I want you to absolutely wreck me.”

The bedroom suddenly quieted, its dim lighting beginning to wrap around the walls and furniture of the room to form an uncomfortably suffocating atmosphere. Or maybe Jimin was just projecting his own deteriorating feelings onto the innocent space. He was well aware that his mind shouldn’t have latched onto the words of the innocent woman he currently had pinned to his bed, shouldn’t have started picturing her wishes in his head, yet he couldn’t stop it. He’s never been able to stop it. But that didn’t stop him from trying every time. 

The more he envisioned the actions, the more he could feel those familiar ghostly hands crawl up his spine. His mind grasped at something, anything else to focus on. 

In his desperation, his unsteady gaze dropped to the girl beneath him. She was the epitome of conventionally attractive, with long, light brown hair sprawled around his mattress and dainty facial features. Modelling agencies would probably die for this girl if she gave them a chance. 

But at the moment she was just a distraction. Or at least she had been, until she had opened her mouth. 

The logical part of him tried to remind himself that her words were just that: words. She was just a horny girl expressing her preferences. It made sense, considering what they were about to do. And if anything, Jimin appreciated it when women told him what they wanted. It made his life a lot easier. 

But those particular wishes churned uneasily in his stomach as he felt the hands continue to travel up his spine, finding a cosy spot on his neck. His heartbeat, which had been racing for an entirely different reason, now thumped painfully in his chest as it quickened in pace. 

This can’t be happening right now, he thought with a mixture of frustration and desperation. 

Jimin pushed the impending, but familiar, feeling aside, choosing instead to focus on Emily.

That had clearly been a mistake.

“Like, tie me down. Choke me. Use me like a freaking slut. I swear I haven’t been railed in weeks,” she continued while running her fingers through his hair, completely oblivious to Jimin’s deteriorating state.

The feelings he had shoved aside pounded against his poorly constructed dam, fueled by the implications of Emily’s words. He could feel the ghostly hands press harder against his neck, labouring his breathing in the process. It was a telltale sign of the panic that had become so familiar to him. He knew now that there was no escaping this episode, no matter how hard he tried to steady his breathing and calm his nerves. 

What he needed to do was get out of here. 

“Those are a lot of demands to cover in one morning,” he said with a forced chuckle, hoping his voice wasn’t as shaky as he felt, “give me a minute, I’ll be right back.”

Before Emily could protest, Jimin slipped off the bed and half stumbled into his bathroom, just barely managing to lock the door.

And just like that, the dam broke. 

Jimin collapsed onto the tiled floor, desperately trying to get some air into his lungs as memories started to flood his mind. They flashed before him like a montage, nightmare after nightmare stealing his ability to breath. At first, he was back in his childhood home, watching his father push his mother down a flight of stairs while screaming at her like a madman. Jimin could feel his heart racing in his chest as he wondered if she was dead. 

But before he could run to her, his memories moved onto the day his father found out his wife had left. Jimin hadn’t even registered the fact that he’d never see his mother again before his father was on him, shouting at him while his hands enclosed around his neck harder. 

Then he was in his old bedroom, watching the bat in his hands crash into his father’s head as he heard a feminine scream. There was blood everywhere, in the room, on his hands. He tried to wipe it off frantically as it burned his skin, but it didn’t matter. The more he wiped off, the more it spread up his arms. 

All he could do was sit helplessly on the floor of the bathroom, head between his knees, as he shook uncontrollably and gasped for air. But the air wouldn’t come. It was like the ghostly hands had finally succeeded in crushing his windpipe and he could no longer fill his lungs. 

Jimin lurched forward suddenly, feeling his heart hammer painfully in his chest. He swore this time was different. 

He swore this time he was going to die. 

His hand slapped desperately against the counter before it made contact with smooth metal. Relieved, his fingers wrapped around it, pulling it upwards until he could hear the faint sounds of water rushing out of the faucet. He tried to aim his attention to the sound of the water spewing out of the tap, listening intently to the way it sputtered out of the circular piece of metal. Then he focused on the water splashing against the smooth marble sink, running against it momentarily before it was swallowed up by the drain. He could hear the water crash against the pipes under his sink as they whisked the water away. 

It took him what felt like hours to really focus on the sound, letting it sooth him as much as it could. Jimin imagined his memories and panic seeping down the drain alongside it, the black plastic pipes guiding them far away from himself and his house. His breathing started getting a little easier with every passing moment as the memories of his father began to seep back into the locked portion of his mind. 

With small pockets of air now able to enter his lungs, Jimin managed to bring his hand down to the floor. He dragged two of his fingers against it in circles, focusing on the cold of the tile seeping into his fingertips and the rough line of grout between them. He inhaled as his finger met one half of the circle, stalling there for a moment, before exhaling as he completed the round. 

When Jimin finally felt himself calm, only the remnants of a few mild tremors left, he let his back drop against the glass side of his walk-in shower with a sigh. A lingering soreness was spreading throughout his chest as he felt his sweat-soaked shirt stick to his back. Although he was more than familiar with episodes like these, he couldn’t help but wonder why this one had been so particularly bad. 

Either way, the “attack” had left him exhausted, to the point that Jimin almost considered skipping school today. It was especially tempting, considering how much Taehyung had been bothering him recently about the therapy and whether it was working. Jimin had to remind him that he had only gone to one session, though he didn’t mention just how much he had hated it. 

But Jimin knew that there were a few concepts he needed to clarify in his first class, so ditching school was out of the question. 

Not to mention, Jimin’s second period had gotten a lot more interesting when the school had decided to transfer him to a different class because of a few scheduling issues. Particularly your presence had intrigued him, because he was so confused as to how he’d never noticed you before. Sure, Jimin had only been attending this school for the past two years, but he still found it hard to believe that the two of you had never crossed paths. He’d have definitely remembered if that were the case. You were, without a doubt, the most attractive woman he’d ever met, there was no way he would have overlooked a face like that.

Jimin stretched forward, just barely managing to close the faucet without having to get up from his position on the floor. You were fun to tease, and definitely something during sex. Jimin didn’t think he’d ever enjoyed sex as much as he had with you. 

His gaze dropped as he remembered the bottle that had been clutched in your hand that night at Taehyung’s house. It had been a shock to him that you were using, even though technically he was well aware he didn’t know you at all. He wondered if your addiction stopped at Adderall, or did you do more than just that? He hoped you didn’t, for your sake. 

Jimin had wanted to say something about it when he had dropped you off, encourage you to choose a different path for yourself. But he couldn’t seem to find the right words. He had used them all up when his father was still alive, none of which were successful of course. So instead he had walked away, guilt nibbling away at him with every step. 

“Jimin?”

Jimin’s head snapped towards the door as Emily’s muffled voice passed through it. He had practically forgotten that she was still there, too wrapped up in his panic and then his thoughts to remember that she’d probably been waiting for him to come back to his bed. He knew he couldn’t do it. She clearly wanted things that he just couldn’t give her. The prospect of having to explain some lousy excuse to her suddenly made him exhausted all over again. 

But thankfully Emily spoke up again before he could reply, “look, my first class starts soon and I can’t miss it. I guess we’ll have to do this another time.” 

He could hear the disappointment in her tone before he listened to the sound of her footsteps as she walked out of his bedroom, followed by the sound of his front door shutting quickly. When he was sure she was gone, he stood from his spot and made his way to his bedroom, picking up his phone to confirm the time. Emily wasn’t wrong, his first class was starting soon. He would have to get going as well. 

Jimin walked back to his bathroom, standing in front of the mirror above the sink. His gaze scanned the damp, rust-coloured hair sticking to his forehead, and then the beads of sweat travelling down his neck. He grimaced. First, he needed a shower.

-

-

-

Jiwoo was in a mood. 

You had begun to suspect as much at the end of your first class, when she had kicked your bag while stomping out of the classroom. Although Jiwoo was always pulling stunts like that, she’d usually accompany it with an irritating taunt or mocking expression. But it wasn’t until right before second period, when she had purposely bumped into the open pencil case on your desk to scatter it all over the floor, when you became certain.

Jiwoo was in a mood. 

You watched her drop into her seat near the front of the class with an angry huff, uncharacteristically not even bothering to spare you a fake “oops.” Normal Jiwoo was far from a saint, but god did annoyed Jiwoo unlock a different type of rage in you. Her irritation made you wonder how her parents’ divorce was going. Probably not great, if her mood today was anything to go on. 

With an annoyed sigh, you slipped off your chair and lowered yourself to the floor to focus on collecting your things, trying to calm your raging heartbeat and shaking hands in the process. You weren’t sure whether it was because of Jiwoo or the Ritalin. This was your third day on Ritalin even though you had vowed to never take the stuff again. You didn’t really have much of a choice. There was still no news on Yoongi, which meant you were still out of Adderall. And although Ritalin made you crazy with nerves, it still somehow managed to help you focus on your schoolwork. Not to mention you’d much rather be a jittery mess than the dead zombie that your Adderall crash had reduced you to.

Unfortunately, until you could get your hands on some Adderall, Ritalin was your only option. 

You shoved the last of your supplies into your pencil case, brows furrowing when you noticed that you were missing your eraser. But one scan of the floor showed no sign of the white rubber. 

You checked under your desk and then your chair, wondering where it could have disappeared to.

It wasn’t until a pair of black dress shoes and grey dress pants appeared in your line of sight when you realised where your eraser had gone. 

“Looking for something?” Jimin asked in a teasing tone, holding out your white eraser between the tips of his index and middle fingers. 

Your gaze reluctantly travelled up to his smug face, the feeling of annoyance a natural response to his presence at this point. 

“Stealing my car wasn’t enough? Now you want my eraser too?”

Jimin’s head tilted for a moment before he rested a hand on your desk and leaned forward so that his next words could only be heard by you. 

“Why would I want anything more when I’ve already got you on your knees for me, kitten?”

You rolled your eyes, ignoring the tempting view of his sharp jawline, before grabbing your pencil case and pushing yourself off of the ground. Leave it to Jimin to turn every instance into an opportunity to flirt. 

“Weren’t you the one that said I had to ask for sex the next time I wanted it? What happened to that?” You asked with a low voice before taking back your eraser. 

“I never said I couldn’t be tempting.”

Then, to your surprise, Jimin dropped into the empty desk beside yours instead of his usual seat behind you. It took you a second to register the sudden change, and then another to eye him weirdly. 

But before you could ask him what he was doing, Mr. Kim walked into the classroom just as the bell rang. The students rushed to their seats to bring out their textbooks, some of the girls swooning over the alleged new shirt he was wearing. You took your seat quickly, sending Jimin a glare in the process. 

Taehyung hurried into the room just after Mr. Kim, slipping unnoticeably past him before dropping into his usual seat. His eyebrows furrowed for a moment when he noticed Jimin wasn’t sitting next to him, and then they furrowed even further when he realised where he was actually sitting. 

“Come on man, what happened to bros before hoes?” He muttered under his breath. You almost laughed at his sulky expression.

Mr. Kim began writing the lesson on the whiteboard, “please turn to page 245.”

You turned to the page alongside the rest of the class as Jimin did the same, distantly noticing your leg bouncing up and down unconsciously. 

Mr. Kim turned back to the class, beginning the lesson by explaining the concepts on the page he had instructed everyone to turn to. He was one of the better teachers, so you were easily able to understand the seemingly complex concepts.  

That was until Jimin started annoying you, just like he had been doing in class for the past few days. It was always small things, like sneakily drawing random doodles in your notebook when you weren’t looking or stealing your pencil every so often. It took everything in you not to throw your eraser at his face. Instead, you dragged your notebook and supplies to the other side of your desk with a huff.

That just made him laugh, one he had to muffle with his hands so Mr. Kim didn’t call him out. 

The class went on like this, a mixture of evading Jimin’s antics while simultaneously trying to understand the lesson being taught by Mr. Kim. You honestly had to applaud the guy for being able to escape Mr. Kim’s gaze for so long. He was notoriously known for being an observant teacher, and because of that you were sure he knew a lot more student secrets than he let on. 

However, Jimin’s antics had to come to an abrupt end when Mr. Kim placed his whiteboard marker down and faced the class, seemingly finished with teaching the lesson. He called up two students, handing them both stacks of papers to hand out to the rest of the class. 

“Your next assignment will consist of a presentation closely resembling a seminar, where each group will be expected to accurately teach the class on an assigned topic,” he explained, characteristically professional and thoughtful with his words, “since the goal of this assignment will be to facilitate understanding, I will be expecting the incorporation of some creative elements in order to keep the presentation engaging in addition to being informative.”

One of the students that had been handing out the mini booklets finally reached you and Jimin, handing the two of you one each before moving onto Taehyung. 

“The booklets in front of you go over the details pertaining to this assignment. Therefore, I expect you all to read through them thoroughly to avoid losing marks over small mistakes.”

Mr. Kim suddenly smiled, “although, with this being your senior year I doubt you all require such a reminder anyway.”

You watched Jiwoo’s hand shoot into the air as you tried to keep Jimin’s hands off your booklet. Mr. Kim nodded towards her before she spoke, “will we get to choose our own groups?”

“No, I will be assigning the groups, as well as the topics,” he replied, earning him a number of whines and groans. But Mr. Kim merely chuckled, amused, but not willing to change his mind. 

He then turned to the first row of students, grouping them in pairs based on their seating. You groaned inwardly when you realised the pattern he was going by and who, in that case, would end up being your partner. 

“Jimin and Y/N,” Mr. Kim grouped, but then paused when he noticed Taehyung sitting without the deskmate, “and Taehyung.”

“Mr. Kim,” Jiwoo said once again, but this time you rolled your eyes knowing what she was going to bring up, “isn’t it unfair that one group has three students? That will lessen their workload compared to everyone else!”

You noticed Jiwoo send you a mocking smile for a moment, clearly trying to incite you.

Witch. 

“You may rest assured, Ms. Kim. I will ensure everything is as fair as possible,” he reassured with a small smile. But Jiwoo just slid down in her seat, annoyed that her plan to make your life harder had pretty much failed. 

You wished she turned around so you could send her your fakest smile. On one hand was Jiwoo, the most annoying witch in existence, and then on another hand was Jimin, the most annoying jerk in existence. 

What has your life come to?

When the bell finally rang and Mr. Kim dismissed the class, you crumpled one of your rough pieces of paper and threw it at Jimin’s face with a glare. 

It wasn’t much, but boy did it make you feel better. 

“What was that for?” He asked, failing miserably at stifling a laugh. 

“You know what.”

Ignoring Jimin’s amused glance, you packed your bag as your classmates began to chat with each other and started making their way to the cafeteria. You wouldn’t be heading there, though, since you usually spent your breaks in the library studying. It just felt better to get all your work out of the way so you could go home and just sleep for hours. 

You walked out of the classroom, thankful that you could finally get away from the annoying thing known as Park Jimin, and then began walking to the library. The hallways were full of students relaxing and playing around with each other, making you think of Namjoon. He was away on some trip for a maths competition. Or maybe it was for a science competition? Either way, he was off doing his nerd stuff, so you couldn’t invite him to hang out after you finished studying. 

You made it to the library’s front desk, sending a smile to the main librarian who returned it sweetly. 

“Hello, have the study room schedules been made yet?” You asked. 

She answered your question with a nod and, after giving her your name, she began searching the computer for your schedule.  

Since the demand for the very limited number of study rooms in the library was so high, the school had decided to come up with a schedule system for the students that wished to use them, because a first come, first serve approach would be much too “barbaric” for a private school of course. Each student was given a schedule for which study room they were assigned to and when they could use it. 

“Hi, can I get my study schedule please?” A voice asked, “my name is Park Jimin.”

Your gaze snapped to your side, finding Jimin standing right next to you. 

Seriously?

“So you’ve resorted to stalking me now?” You asked, causing Jimin to turn to you with a surprised expression. 

When his gaze fell on you, he grinned. 

“How come I’m the stalker? You could very well be the one stalking me,” he said. 

Before you could reply, the librarian walked back to her desk and handed you and Jimin your printed schedules. The two of you thanked her before walking over to the library’s elevator while looking them over. 

Thankfully, you were scheduled for a study room on Wednesdays during break, so you didn’t have to find somewhere else to study at the moment. 

You eyed Jimin when he followed you into the elevator, watching as he pressed the button to the floor you were also going to. The two of you seemed to be finding yourselves in each other’s presence a lot lately. It made you groan inwardly, knowing that the semester had only just begun.

It was like having a second Jiwoo since you and her were usually thrown together a lot due to your familial ties, but at least Jimin didn’t kick your bag or slap your pencil case to the ground. That earned him at least a few more points in your book.

The book’s name? “The Most Annoying People in Kim Y/N’s Life,” of course.

The elevator door dinged as it revealed the hallway of the second floor. Jimin walked out of it first, unfortunately taking a right into the hallway, which was the same way you were going. 

You followed him reluctantly.

“Who’s following who now, kitten?” He said with a smirk, an eyebrow raised at you. 

You simply huffed, “shut up.”

You didn’t bother to come up with a better comeback. All you had to do was make it to your study room, then you could finally get rid of him. This day had been filled with way too much Jimin, and you were actually looking forward to doing homework in a nice and quiet room over having to deal with his annoying butt. 

Jimin continued through the hallway until he stopped in front of the door to the farthest study room from the elevator. The action made your eyes widen.

“No,” you denied immediately, stomping over to him before grabbing his schedule from his hand, “no way. There’s no way.”

Your mouth fell open as you took in his schedule, almost exactly identical to your own. The only day in which your and Jimin’s schedules didn’t align was Monday. Only one out of the five days of school in a week would you be free of him. No way. There was no way this was possible. Of all the insane things…

While you were distracted, a confused Jimin took your own schedule from your hands, looking over it curiously. It only took him a second to figure out what your issue was, but when he did, he couldn’t help himself. 

Jimin burst into a fit of laughter. 

“Stop laughing, this isn’t funny,” you whined, smacking the paper against his head. That only made him laugh harder as he fell to the floor with a hand clutching his stomach. 

“Guess we’re stuck with each other now,” Jimin managed through his laughter. 

You rolled your eyes, choosing instead to walk past him into the room. Fine, if you were going to be stuck with him, then you were just going to have to ignore his presence completely. It was the only ray of hope in your seemingly continuous misery. 

You dropped into a seat at the large table, spreading your work out as you opened your laptop and began typing furiously against the innocent keys. 

After a few minutes Jimin walked into the room, closing it behind him before he thankfully dropped into a chair away from yours and brought out his own work. You risked a glance upwards, catching a smirk on his lips that made your blood boil. 

Your eyes stayed glued to your screen after that. 

You expected him to annoy you the same way he had during your second period class by stealing your pencils or throwing a paper plane at you, but instead he remained focused on his work for a full half an hour straight. That came as a surprise to you because you honestly hadn’t been expecting him to be very studious. Maybe it was because he had annoyed you during class. Or maybe it was because you had unintentionally believed in the stereotype against guys that slept around. Either way, it was surprising when you managed to get through half an hour worth of work without any disturbances. 

After half an hour, though, Jimin sighed, leaning back in his chair as he stretched his arms behind him. He’d taken off his blazer, so you could see the defined lines of his muscles stretch under his dress shirt. Your straying gaze quickly shot back to your screen, but not before Jimin had noticed your curious eyes. He smirked. 

You were able to work for a few more minutes before Jimin suddenly leaned forward, eyeing you curiously. 

“So,” he said, causing you to turn your head towards him questionably, “how did your dad end up reacting?”

 You furrowed your eyebrows, “what?”

“After the party, when you came home after midnight. I’m surprised he wasn’t already standing on the porch with a shotgun ready.”

You snorted, unable to imagine your dad doing that, “my dad’s not like that.”

“Oh, so he was cool with it and everything?” He asked. 

You shifted in your seat, “no… I mean, I don’t know. He wasn’t home that night.”

Jimin nodded, “business trip?”

“Kind of. He’s a truck driver,” you explained, a little weirded out by the suddenly normal conversation but still appreciating the unexpected break from your work, “he’s usually only home on weekends. Otherwise he’s out driving across the country.”

Jimin’s eyes widened, “so he leaves you alone during the entire week? And sometimes he doesn’t even come back on the weekends?”

You shrugged, finding it odd how surprised Jimin looked, “yeah? I’m not a kid, it’s not that big of a deal.”

Jimin’s gaze dropped to the table in front of him, seemingly deep in thought. But you noticed a slight scowl in his features. 

Weird. 

You shifted to face Jimin, a question coming to mind, “but why are you only asking about my dad?”

Jimin didn’t look up from the table, “I heard what that girl said about your mom last Friday… I just kind of assumed…”

The room quieted into what felt like an awkward silence. You had the feeling that something you said had cut the surprisingly normal conversation short, but there was nothing you said that could have offended him so you didn’t really understand why that was. 

You turned back to your work, brushing against the touchpad to light up your laptop’s screen once again. After sending one final curious glance at Jimin, you went back to your work. 

But Jimin was clearly lost in thought. 

-

-

-

The first thing Jimin noticed when he walked into the room was Lauren, who was sitting on one of the beige sofas situated next to the glass coffee table. She had been looking down at the binder she had shown him in their last session, reading over something intently before the sound of the door opening had her looking upwards and then smiling. 

“Hello Jimin,” she greeted, to which he gave her a curt nod. 

Thankfully, Lauren had already situated herself on the sofa facing away from the door, allowing Jimin to sit on the one that gave him a view of both the entrance and the window at the same time. Even in his sour mood, he was able to appreciate the gesture. 

He knew Lauren was studying him, taking in his sudden attitude, but to his surprise she didn’t call him out on it. Instead, she closed the binder and placed it beside her on the sofa, bringing a much thinner notebook onto her lap in its place.

“Did you complete the Impact Statement worksheet I assigned in the last session?” She asked, to which Jimin nodded. 

He had avoided starting it until the last minute, something he knew Lauren wouldn’t approve of considering she had given him that big speech about avoidance and how it wasn’t helping him. He just couldn’t help it, he’d spent years trying to rid his mind of that night’s memories. Anything that reminded him of it was discarded, any person that reminded him of it was avoided. Even the house had been sold the second it was passed down to him. So doing this Impact Statement? Something that would not only remind him about it, but make him think about it to a deeper extent… it had been hard. 

“Could you read your Impact Statement out loud?”

Jimin’s eyebrows pulled together at the random request, confused as to why that was necessary. He wasn’t in kindergarten anymore, where they would make his class take turns reading various children’s books to each other. 

He shifted in his seat, clearly uncomfortable with the request. But he couldn’t make a fuss about it. He needed to give this therapy thing a genuine try, especially considering the enormous attack he had this morning. 

Jimin brought out the statement from his school bag, unfolding it slowly. He cleared his throat before finally following along the hastily written words. 

“This traumatic experience happened because I was stupid and did something horrible. I knew that my father wasn’t himself, I knew that he was under the influence, and yet I still ended up murdering him, my own father, like some kind of psychopath. Saying that that makes me a horrible person feels like an understatement, because being a killer is one thing, but being able to kill your family? That must make me even worse than a murderer. I feel like I don’t deserve anything good because of it. If anything, the world should bring me my karma and just end it already. I think that sometimes… that because of what I did, someone is just silently watching me and waiting for the right moment to get back at me. I feel like I’m never safe, like I constantly have to be on guard whenever I’m out. I feel like people should think the same about me too, they shouldn’t trust me either. My past is evidence enough that I might just lose it and hurt someone. I would hate to do that to Taehyung especially, the only person that’s genuinely been there for me. But anyways, the gist of it is that I’m not a good person. I make bad decisions. I feel unsafe all the time, especially when I’m around other men. Sometimes when I’m out I can imagine every grown man that looks my way hates me the same way my dad did, and that they’d go after me the first chance they got. I don’t want to get close to people because I feel like if I build any kind of genuine relationship, I’ll end up hurting them. That’s why I don’t think Taehyung should have a friend like me, that he deserves better. I don’t know how to make things better. I don’t think I’ll ever be normal again.”

The room fell quiet as Jimin set the paper down on the coffee table, wanting it away from him immediately. He was relieved that he was finally done with this assignment, though he hadn’t noticed how much he had ended up writing despite the limited amount of time he had to complete the worksheet. 

“What did it feel like to write and then read the Impact Statement aloud?” Lauren asked, an expression of complete neutrality. He couldn’t help but feel grateful that she wasn’t disgusted by him. 

Or at least she wasn’t showing it. 

“It was hard,” Jimin admitted, gaze travelling everywhere but her, “honestly I didn’t start the worksheet until just an hour before I came here.”

Lauren surprisingly nodded, “the good thing is that you completed it nonetheless. It is difficult work, Jimin, and you were able to get through it. That takes a lot of strength.”

“But I should remind you that avoidance only helps in maintaining PTSD symptoms, right?”

Jimin nodded. 

“How do you feel after reading the Impact Statement?” She asked. 

“A little less anxious,” Jimin replied, though it was more the fact that he was relieved it was over than anything else. Whether his improved feelings were because the Impact Statement had actually helped or because of the relief he felt from it being over, there was no doubt that he felt better now compared to the anxiety he had been feeling when walking into this room. 

“If doing the assignment in this way made you a little less anxious, then I wonder what it would have been like to have completed the assignment earlier in the week?” Lauren wondered out loud, but she didn’t dwell on it for long. She was clearly keen on changing the topic. 

“Now, earlier it seemed that you might have been upset about something. Could you explain to me why that was?”

“It’s nothing,” Jimin said, shaking his head as he leaned back against the sofa. But he could feel his blood begin to boil once again, his thoughts from earlier apparently the flame. His anger simmered to the surface and, before he knew it, he was blurting everything out. 

“It’s just… I was talking to this classmate of mine earlier today, just a normal conversation, and she told me something about her dad that kind of pissed me off.”

Lauren tilted her head, “can you tell me what she told you that made you so angry?”

Your words from earlier filled his mind once again, bringing the anger along with them. He had been furious throughout the rest of the school day, and all throughout the ride here, with your words and their implications repeating over and over in his head.

Jimin suddenly stood up and walked over to the window, his anger making him want to move around. 

“The thing is, she’s actually this girl I hooked up with at a party last Friday,” he started to explain, not realising that he had begun pacing around, “I’d ended up taking her home that night because she didn’t really seem like she could get there on her own, so I just casually asked her about how her dad had reacted to her getting home so late. She started telling me about how her dad hadn’t been home that night because he’s a truck driver. In fact, she said that he usually wasn’t home at all throughout the week, and sometimes he didn’t even come back on the weekends that he’s supposed to.”

Jimin spun around towards Lauren, who had shifted so that she was still facing him, “can you believe that? What kind of father would leave their kid alone for weeks at a time? And does he even know what his own daughter has been doing in his absence? She uses, you know. I bet he has no clue.”

“But of course he doesn’t,” Jimin scoffed, “just one of the millions of examples of a grown man being absolutely useless and incompetent as a father.”

He turned to look outside once again, trying to focus on anything that could calm down his racing heart. 

“Do you feel that way about your own father?” He heard Lauren ask from behind him. 

“Obviously. He beat my mom, and then he beat me. That didn’t exactly make him father slash husband of the year. Nothing could justify his actions,” Jimin reasoned. 

“Do you feel that your actions that night also can’t be justified?”

He paused, the question catching him off guard. Slowly, Jimin faced Lauren once again, “well yes, I’m not different from him. If anything I’m worse. He beat people. I murdered him.”

Lauren’s gaze bored into him in an almost unnerving way before she spoke, “‘murder.’ That’s a strong word.”

“It’s appropriate in this context.” 

“From what you’ve told me, it seems like you killed your father after he had begun to hurt your girlfriend-”

“Ex,” Jimin said, his gaze not meeting hers, “ex girlfriend.”

“Ex girlfriend,” Lauren corrected, “your actions occurred in a very specific place and time, and under certain circumstances.”

“Yeah, but he still died. And I’m the one that killed him.”

“Yes, he died, and it seems, at least in part, because of your actions. Does that make you a murderer?”

“Yes,” Jimin answered straight away, not comprehending what was so hard to understand, “I took a bat to his head, and then he died. That’s murder. And that’s worse than anything he had ever done to me.”

“Really? You think it’s worse?” Lauren asked, her voice suddenly quieter. For the first time since these sessions started, Jimin thought he might have caught a little sadness in her expression. But the moment he caught it the expression disappeared, tucked back under that blanket of neutrality that he had become so used to. Distantly, he wondered if he had imagined it or not. 

“On one hand, people were hurt. On the other hand, someone was killed. Obviously both situations aren’t good since people were hurt either way. But I killed him, he didn’t kill anyone.”

“It is true that the outcomes are different,” Lauren agreed, “but it’s the context that I wonder about.”

Jimin’s brows furrowed, “what do you mean?”

“Do you think what the intention was in those situations matters, regardless of the outcome?”

“No,” Jimin replied firmly, pulling back on the frustration in his tone,“in one case someone was killed. In another, no one was killed.”

Lauren paused for a moment, seemingly studying him with her characteristically neutral expression. When nothing was said for a few seconds, she clasped her fingers together before resting them over her lap professionally, “while it is true that your father died, and that your actions played a role in it, I think we might slightly disagree on the definition of the term ‘murder.’ It is apparent that his death has been a very difficult thing for you to accept, and that you are trying to make sense of that. From what you’ve told me, the sense that you appear to have made of his death is that you are a ‘murderer.’ I believe this is a good example of one of the stuck points that seem to have prevented you from recovering from this traumatic event. We’ll definitely be spending more time together on understanding your part in his death.”

Lauren then began to explain something about how important it was to be able to identify and label his emotions and thoughts, but Jimin’s thoughts were too stuck on her earlier words to pay any attention. He wondered about how intentions might or might not matter in the context of whether a death is considered a murder or not. When a person participates in an action that ends up with another person dead, he was pretty sure that classified the situation as a murder. He couldn’t really understand where the nuances existed in a situation like this. 

But then again, Lauren’s suggestion hadn’t been too crazy of a thought either. If a person didn’t intend to kill the other, then would it still be considered a murder?

Had he intended to kill his father that night? Jimin wanted to say no and deny such a thing, because he really hadn’t wanted to do that. But he had taken a wooden baseball bat straight to his father’s skull, what other outcome had Jimin been expecting? Maybe intention did matter in general, but in Jimin’s case he concluded it made no difference. 

“How do you feel about the death of your father?” Lauren asked randomly, catching Jimin’s straying attention. He had no clue what the context behind the question was since his thoughts had been elsewhere while she had been explaining it, which had caught him off guard.

“Um,” Jimin paused, having to think about it for a moment, “I know he did horrible things to me, like I’m aware his actions were wrong, but… a part of me felt a little saddened by his death. Maybe not because of losing him as a person, but losing him meant that I had lost the last of my family. It does make me feel sad when I think about it.”

Lauren nodded encouragingly, “and that is a completely natural reaction to have when you feel that you’ve lost something. It’s good to feel that sadness and let it run its course.”

Jimin let a breathy chuckle escape his lips, though there was no humour behind it, “feeling sad isn’t exactly something I enjoy- actually I prefer to avoid feeling anything at all. It’s just easier that way.”

Lauren crossed her leg over the other, continuing to focus on Jimin as she brought her clasped hand over her lap once again, “have you ever allowed yourself to feel sad?”

He shook his head, explaining that he’s always preferred avoiding anything and everything that had to do with intense feelings like that. Even the frustration he had shown earlier was a generally rare occurrence. 

“Then if you’ve never allowed yourself to feel your emotions, how do you know that it would be easier not to feel them?”

Jimin was silent, processing the logic behind her words once again. He was starting to realise that therapy was a lot more logical than what he had initially thought.

“From what you’ve told me, avoiding your feelings hasn’t helped you very much so far. Maybe allowing yourself to feel the natural feelings associated with the traumatic event may help you recover from what happened?”

“Maybe…” He relented, knowing that her reasoning made sense to him. 

But Jimin still couldn’t help but feel anxious at the thought of feeling his emotions. He didn’t even know if he’d ever truly felt them before. With a father that had been beating him for as long as he could remember, it really had just become easier to numb himself to the pain. He was scared of revisiting that pain, he realised. The pain that he’d been trying to run away from his whole life.

Lauren opened her binder to bring out a few sheets that were similar to the Impact Statement worksheet she had given him in their last session, except they clearly had a different purpose. She called them “A-B-C” Sheets, which again reminded Jimin of kindergarten, and explained how to go about completing them properly. She also explained how they were meant to help him begin to identify the things he was telling himself and his subsequent emotions before they had exchanged pleasantries and Jimin had walked out of the room.

Unlike the last session, where he had rushed through the door at light speed, Jimin took his time walking through the hallways and out of the building. This time his mind was filled with questions of murder and intention. He thought about feeling his feelings, and how long it had been since he had lost the ability to do so. He thought about you and your dad. He thought about everything.  

There was just so much to think about. 

So much to think about indeed.  

#jimin high school au #jimin fanfic #jimin x reader #bts x reader #jimin fic #bts au fic #bts au #jimin #park jimin #bts jimin #jimin bts #high school student jimin #bts fic #jimin angst #jimin smut #jimin x y/n #bts series #jimin series #jin #yoongi #namjoon #hoseok #taehyung #jungkook #seokjin #suga #rm #jhope #v

[zzzzzestforlife]

day 29 of 30 // 행복하자~ 🐰(let's be happy)

so close to the finish line!!! 😁 i feel like celebrating but i don't know what to do 😂 i think i've become a little addicted to making progress, especially with language learning and my health — i don't feel like prioritizing anything else even though i have to 😅

today's accomplishments 💯

🧠 aced psych quizzes (2x)

🥰 physiotherapy exercises (morning set)

🥰 arm workout (while watching ~3m of a calm interior decorating vlog which sounds like it shouldn't work, but it did)

🙊 Japanese lesson (2x)

🙊 Chinese lesson

🙊 Korean lesson

❤️ went for a drive with my family ☺️ (and i had aux privileges so we basically listened to Chinese, Japanese, Korean Seventeen and BTS songs the whole time hehe)

🙊 Exclusive Fairytale clip

🙊 CYZJ cont'd

🙊 Yuri on Ice cont'd

📚 read The Housekeepers (focus time: 20m)

🥰 rowing (4m song)

🥰 physiotherapy exercises (evening set)

❤️ 금일일기 (today's diary) + Chinese and English translations under the cut if you're interested ☺️ have a lovely day 🍻

이거는 내 찰렌지의 마지막 주입니다. 난 설리다! 난 많이은 것들 배우서. 그리고 이 주말 너무 쉬워서, 난 너무 놀랐다! 조금, 하루하루게 난 개선입니다!

这个我的挑战的最后一周���我很兴奋了！ 我学了很多的东西。而因为这个周末很简了所以我很惊讶了！一点一天一天，我改进了。

This is the last week of my challenge. I'm so excited! I learned many things. And this weekend was so easy, I was surprised! Little by little, day by day, I'm improving!

💌 translating notes: Korean and Chinese basically don't consider the subject of the sentence to be necessary a lot of times, so i could go without saying 난 or 我 all the time, but my English-speaking brain won't let me 😂

#studyblr #langblr #bts #bts army #jimin #zesty's life #astudentslifebuoy #student life #study motivation #study inspiration #korean langblr #chinese langblr #30 days of productivity #100 days of productivity #100 days of studying #100 days of self discipline #studyspo #study aesthetic #cozy aesthetic #self development #self empowerment #self improvement #self care #self love #psychblr #bookblr #currently reading #japanese langblr #study blog #day in the life

[xoxiu]

autumn outside the post office - jin x reader

chapter four table of contents masterlist join the taglist

≪ how long will beautiful things last? ≫

summary: it wasn't your fault that dr. kim was the most beautiful man you've ever seen. falling for him was entirely your fault, however. first semester at college and you're already dreaming of a student/professor relationship- so naughty and against the code of conduct. you like the thrill, though.

tags/warnings: smut, teacher!jin, college au, cute yet forbidden romance, daddy dom!jin, love triangles, frat boys jungkook and taehyung, age regression, age play, ddlg, spanking, eating disorders, mental health, first love, exhibitionism, lots of blowjobs, age gap

taglist: @severecatsheep

"Today we're going to be starting our first novel, Our Twisted Hero."

For once, you stared outside the window during literature class, looking at something other than Dr. Kim. You felt too guilty, uncomfortable, and dirty after what you did. He was your professor, and you kissed him.

And you liked it.

What made it all worse is that you wanted more. You wanted to be absolutely destroyed by this man, and then lovingly cuddled immediately after. You wanted him, nothing but him, and all of him.

"y/n?" A voice called out your name- it was Dr. Kim. You snapped out of your thoughts and turned your focus back on the class. Seokjin smiled as you did so.

"Thank you for rejoining us." You blushed out of embarrassment- you had been caught daydreaming.

The class continued with no other distractions. Still, you were in a dazed high from yesterday. Nothing felt real as you jotted down assignments in your planner. Just like that, you were distracted again. Little hearts covered the empty spaces of your planner as you mindlessly doodled on.

"y/n!" Dr. Kim scolded this time, slamming a book against the desk. You jumped in your seat, sitting up straight and giving your full attention to the professor. A blush heated your face as everyone turned to look at you.

"Since some of us don't want to pay attention, class is over now. Remember to have up to page 20 read and your study guide done for Monday." He looked back at you, solely addressing you, "y/n, I'd like to speak with you for a moment."

You slowly began to pack up your backpack as students filed out of the classroom. Dr. Kim made his way to the back of the class towards you, his eyes burning holes into you. He smirked as you kept your head down, refusing to look up at him.

"You really can't keep me off your mind, can you?" He teased, putting a finger under your chin, forcing you to look at him. His stare soon turned cold again, "Look at me when I'm speaking to you, hun."

"Yes, sir," you blushed at the pet name. Looking down, you noticed a growing bulge in Seokjin's slacks.

"My eyes are up here, y/n." He gripped your chin forcefully. "See something you like?"

You opened your mouth, but no words came out. Seokjin released your face and reached behind you to close the blinds. The room grew significantly darker, especially in the back where a fluorescent light above you had burnt out. Wetting your lips, you couldn't keep your eyes off the professor as he leaned against the back wall.

"Knees, now."

Without hesitation, you kneeled on the floor, shuffling closer so you were closer to Dr. Kim. He smiled down at you, running a hand through your hair. You leaned into the touch and closed your eyes.

"Such a good girl, so obedient for Daddy." Seokjin tugged at your hair, forcing a small gasp out of you. Your panties grew wetter from his words. Not a single thought was running through your mind except for Dr. Kim.

The man chuckled above you. "I'm not sure if you deserve this after not paying attention in class. Or was this exactly what you were thinking of?" All you could do was let out a pitiful whine, looking back and forth between his bulge and his face.

"Hmm? What's that? Not as brave as you were yesterday, huh?"

Kissing him felt like nothing; you had kissed guys before this. However, not once were you so close to another person's private area, teetering on the edge of sex. It felt exciting, yet intimidating.

"I-I don't know..." You mumbled, feeling a lot more shy and exposed. You looked away towards the door, anxious that someone may come in. Seokjin seemed to pick up on your worries.

"No one has this room reserved for another hour, don't worry. It's just us." Another hand ran through your hair, gently stroking it and placing a stray strand behind your ear.

You weren't ready for this. It felt wrong. As your eyes darted around the room, you anxiously bounced on your legs. Leading the professor on like this was a horrible thing to do, and for what? All you had was a little crush and now look at you, kneeling in front of your teacher with soaked panties as he palmed his hard-on.

"Maybe you're not ready for this cock, is that it?" You nodded your head, embarrassed tears glazing over your eyes. Your hands came up to cover your face from any more embarrassment or shame.

Seokjin picked you up and placed you on the table next to your bag. You moved your hands away from your face, allowing him to deeply kiss you. Kissing him felt so easy, and when he tugged gently on your bottom lip, you went crazy. Your hands wrapped around his broad shoulders, pulling him deeper. His tongue found its way into your mouth, and your eyes shot wide open. You pulled away from the kiss, not liking the feeling.

"What's wrong?" Dr. Kim asked, his face full of concern. Biting your lip, you stared at his beautiful, full lips, now tinted red.

"I don't like tongue," You felt ashamed to admit, "Sensory thing..."

He giggled at your bashfulness, placing a gentle peck on your lips.

"I'll try to remember that."

————

The Korean Cultural meeting took place in the library. You decided to skip your meeting at the last minute, deeming it pointless. Classes had been going well, better than well in fact, so you saw no point in attending.

As you approached, Dr. Kim sent you a smile. He pulled out an empty chair for you right next to him. All eyes were now on you. You tensed up as you took a seat, looking around the table with a wavering smile.

Jimin and Taehyung sat across from you, hyping up your arrival. 'There she is!' 'The party can start now!' 'As beautiful as ever!' You blushed at their cheers, desperately wanting them to just shut up. They were so nice and friendly, maybe a bit too much, but it always made you smile.

There were many people you didn't know. They stared at you with confusion, questioning who you were and why Jimin and Taehyung acted so excited to see you. At the end of the table sat Cara with another boy. She was all over him, her legs over his lap and arms embracing his neck, basically sitting on his lap. The boy looked mighty uncomfortable and tired until his eyes landed on you. He looked you up and down, smirking.

You couldn't help but notice his shirt with 'TKE' on it in giant letters. Oh, he was in Tau Kappa Epsilon with Taehyung. Upperclassmen had warned you about them, and how they were the unruly frat house constantly on the verge of being suspended from Greek life. Taehyung made you believe the rumors were all exaggerated lies, but one look at the boy across the table only confirmed the stereotypes. He looked like trouble.

By the time the meeting start time came around, roughly 16 students were in attendance. Once the table capacity was reached, Seokjin gave up his seat next to you, opting to stand between the tables the club was using. There was another professor you didn't recognize who lead the meeting, with Dr. Kim commenting every once in a while.

You felt eyes on you at all times. From the boy at your table to Dr. Kim, you knew you were being watched. You tried your best to ignore it, listening to the speaker, but you couldn't help but take quick glances.

The boy looked you over as if examining you closely. He looked impressed by you, making you feel small under his gaze. His eyes watched your every move, focusing a bit too much on your chest area, as if you were a theatre act. He didn't want to miss a moment of you.

Dr. Kim's eyes were softer, more welcoming. He looked almost proud of you for showing up tonight, thankful that you came. You didn't miss his wink as your eyes met, making you blush and quickly look away.

The meeting concluded sooner than you thought- only lasting a solid 15 minutes. A packet was passed out to everyone, detailing upcoming meetings, events, and a study abroad trip to Korea.

Led by Mr. Kim.

You were the last one remaining at the meeting, logging the meetings and events into your planner. A hand on your shoulder made you jump- you swore you were alone.

"Thank you for coming tonight," Dr. Kim looked down at you with a smile. Smiling back, you closed your planner, giving Seokjin your whole attention.

"I'm sorry about earlier," he said, looking genuinely remorseful.

"It's okay, you didn't know."

Seokjin checked the time on his watch. "I think the buses stopped for the day by now. Shall I drive you home?"

Flustered, you stammered out gibberish. You knew the buses hadn't stopped their routes yet, not until 10 pm. Dr. Kim was lying to you, trying to persuade you into getting into his car. Hesitation flooded your thoughts. You knew that if you got in his car, this relationship would cross the boundaries of a professional relationship. Leaving campus with a teacher was a major red flag. There would be no going back.

"Sure."

#bts fanfic #seokjin x reader #kim seokjin #teacher/student #bts smut #college au #kim namjoon #min yoongi #jung hoseok #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #bts #autumn outside the post office

[belle-keys]

Korean Language

정말 해야 할 목표가 있다면, 뒤돌아보지 않기 주저하지 말고, 망설이지 말고, 일단 도전하는 게 중요합니다. If you have a really important goal, do not look back. And do not hesitate, do not doubt – but for a start, just try, start.

- Park Jimin (2018)

#langblr #korean langblr #korean language #hangul #langspo #studyblr #studyspo #polyglot #bilingual #foreign languages #languages #south korea #korea aesthetic #park jimin #korean quotes #seoul #seoul aesthetic #east asia #student #lingblr #productivity #moodboard #han river #study motivation #hallyu #light academia #light academia aesthetic

[musicloverxoxo7]

Lessons with Professor Park – featuring Jimin

Biology professor!Jimin   x   fem!reader

Summary: Professor Park is one of the hottest guys you’ve ever seen. For some reason, he seems drawn to you as well. Can you stay away from him or will you fall for temptation?

Themes/warnings: AU, smut with a bit of plot, protected sex, fingering, nipple play, bit of fluff, age gap (about 5 years and both are over 21)

Wordcount: ca. 3.6k

Disclaimer: 18+, DO NOT INTERACT IF YOU ARE UNDER 18

I do not own BTS. They merely inspire me. None of this is related to their persons in real life.

You knew the young professor was trouble the moment you walked into his classroom on your first day of your second year in the Master’s program. A long strand of dark hair was falling into his forehead and his shirt was open one button too many.

But you tried your utmost to focus on the seminar he was teaching. Of course, it couldn’t be a huge lecture hall with a hundred students. No, it had to be only ten people.

Nine, now that one has dropped out.

At the end of today’s seminar, Professor Park leans against his desk and looks at everyone in turn.

“Any questions for today? No?”

It’s like he misses your raised hand on purpose.

“Alright then. Have a nice weekend.”

Everyone, including you, starts packing up. You know Professor Park waits around for a few minutes after the end of each seminar for the more hesitant people. So, you wait until everyone has cleared out and approach him.

 “Professor, I have a question about the paper for next month.”

He’s sitting atop the desk now, looking at you with slightly raised eyebrows.

“Please, do ask them.”

You come closer with the piece of paper which you’ve written your questions on.

“Also”, he continues, “feel free to call me Jimin. It always feels a bit weird when people just a few years younger call me Professor.”

Which is something he said during the first day of the seminar as well. Except, it still feels wrong calling him Jimin. You like to reserve first name basis for people you actually know.

It seems he only now spots the list in your hand.

“Exactly how long is the list?”

“Seven questions. Oh, am I keeping you? I can ask them next week just as well.”

He holds out his hand in a calm down gesture.

“How about you ask the questions while we walk to my office?”

“Of course, sure.”

He walks around the desk and bends down to pick up his briefcase. His tight suit pants show off his ass and thighs exceptionally well. Quickly, you look at your list, but you might be smirking a little.

“Okay, let’s go.”

The walk to Professor Park’s office isn’t particularly long. You’ve only gotten through 3 of the questions. He unlocks the door, turns on the light and walks in.

“Come on in. I have another five minutes to answer the rest of your questions.”

Hesitantly, you walk into the office. It’s clean, minimalistic and there are tons of books.

While you move on to question number 4, Professor Park puts his briefcase down on his chair and rifles through a neat stack on his desk. It doesn’t distract him from answering your question.

Finally, he finds the piece of paper he seems to have been looking for and slides it into his briefcase. While answering the next question, he puts on his suit jacket and looks around for something else.

He’s finished answering question number 6 by the time he comes up with a tie whose knot is a mess. Professor Park sighs.

He undoes the knot and tries to get it right, while answering your last question. He does not succeed.

“Uhm, professor, do you need help?”

“You can tie a tie?” He sounds so relieved you nearly burst out laughing.

“I can, yes.”

You put down your paper and pen and approach him. The tie’s ends hang loosely around his neck. You’d never noticed before how strong of a neck he has. Strong and muscular like his thighs and ass.

Somehow, you still manage to keep a straight, neutral face as you set to work tying a simple knot. Being so close to him feels exhilarating and forbidden at the same time. You love the feeling.

“May I ask how come you can’t tie a tie? I’ve seen you wear them quite often.”

“I don’t know. Ties and I have always been enemies. Feels wrong to now make them my friends.” His eyes narrow into a cute smile. “My mom still ties them for me whenever she visits. She says I should at least find myself a partner who can tie them.”

“Have you heeded her?”

“Nope.” The smile is still there. It’s a little less cute now, though. “She tries to set me up with lawyers, doctors, even an engineer, but I like it when I share a few interests with whoever I’m seeing.”

His voice is husky and low. You know you’re walking into dangerous territory. It’s just too alluring not to go for it.

“Interests like biology?”

“Among other things. Or dancing.” So that’s where he has these impressive muscles from. “Music. Sewing. Perhaps reading.”

He sounds like a dream character come to life.

“Any of those things you enjoy, Ms. y/l/n?”

“All of them. Well, except I can’t sew. I prefer knitting.”

The knot is tied and still you’re standing ridiculously close to him. You become even more aware of that fact when he shifts a little and his thigh touches yours.

“Thanks for answering my questions. I wouldn’t want to keep you any longer.”

“You’re welcome. And thanks for the tie.”

“If you have any tie emergencies in the future, I’m here to help.”

With a polite smile you take your notes and leave.

Of course, this wasn’t the only time. Two weeks later, Professor Park asks you after the seminar to come help with his tie. Which you do. Afterwards you sit together for over an hour and chat about biology, music and life while drinking tea or coffee. It becomes a habit. One you indulge in every single week.

He hasn’t made any advances towards you yet. It gets to the point where you think he’s just looking for a friend. To be honest, you want him to be your friend. He interesting, hilarious and attentive. Except that you can’t keep yourself from imagining how those thighs might feel under your palms.

This week, the Professor has scheduled your little meeting for two hours after the end of your seminar, because of some important meeting in between.

You’ve spent the free time in the library and have gotten a ton of work done. You knock on the door.

“Come on in.”

You push the door open and freeze.

Professor Park is standing in front of you with his shirt unbuttoned. You can see his well-muscled chest, abs that look like marble and a happy trail disappearing into his pants.

If he notices you looking, he doesn’t comment on it.

“Please tell me you’re the most practical person in the world and have a sewing kit with you.” His tone is slightly panicked.

Only now do you look at his face. He looks panicked too. Not like his usual, calm self at all. Your brain goes into helping mode.

“What’s the issue?”

“Two buttons came off. It’s the only shirt I have here. No spares, no jackets. I have a meeting in twenty minutes and no time to run home and get a new one.”

You close the door, take down your backpack and dig around in the front pouch. Finally, you come up with an emergency set. Not just for clothing, but for medical ones as well. All in one.

“Y/n, you are my savior. Thank you!”

You hand him the set. He takes off his shirt, sits down on his sofa and gets to work.

“I’m sorry that our meeting is so short today. I would have warned you ahead of time, but the big boss only scheduled it an hour ago.”

You lean against the inside of the door and watch him.

“That’s alright. I’ll just go back to the library and get some more work done.”

“Nobody waiting for you at home?”

“Other than my laundry? No.”

“Same”, he chuckles.

“You really are good with a needle”, you comment. And he truly is. But your eyes keep straying to his naked torso. He only hums in agreement.

“You must have done a lot of dancing to get those muscles.”

“I’ve been doing contemporary since I was about 10.” He looks up and smiles devilishly. “Thanks for noticing. And I’m sorry if it makes you uncomfortable. I don’t usually sit in front of students half-naked.”

“I’m sure most wouldn’t mind. For example, for anatomy class. How to better show certain muscles than with a dancer using them?”

He’s looking at you with those unreadable eyes of his. They’re always like a wall is built right behind them.

“I’d only do that for… special students.”

He lays aside the shirt and puts needle and thread back into your little emergency kit.

“Mh, what a shame that I got a hundred out of a hundred in anatomy class, then.”

Professor Park gets up and brings you the emergency kit. He stands so close that you can smell his cologne. It’s intoxicating. You look at his neck.

“Something wrong with my neck?”

“No, all good.”

“Why are you looking at it like that?”

“Just wondered what kind of cologne you’re wearing. It’s nice.”

You shrug your shoulders and try to act all nonchalant.

“I didn’t spray any on my neck.”

“No?”

You actually are perplexed. Professor Park’s eyes narrow in a way that makes you want to throw yourself at him.

“You can find out where though, if you want.”

He opens his arms and looks at you with a slight smile. The moment of truth. Your time to show you’re interested as well.

You take a step forward. And another. Now, if you jut out your chest, it will touch his. Your nose comes to his neck. He’s right. No cologne there. Only his own smell. Which makes you want to dig your nose into his neck and keep sniffing.

But you move on. To his jaw. His eyes are closed as you move your nose along it, his lips slightly parted. One of his hands comes to rest lightly on the small of your back.

“Mh, not here.”

 You take his free arm and pass your nose over it. He shivers at the light touch. Nothing at his wrists either.

“Professor, you’ve hidden it well.”

“It’s in plain sight, Ms. y/l/n.”

You turn back to him and place a hand on his chest. His eyes are still closed.

“Very warm”, he murmurs.

You bend your knees a little until you can run your nose over his chest. This is where the smell is coming from. His warm skin practically radiates the citrusy, light scent. You let your lips follow your nose. His head drops back, and he lets out a sigh.

You inhale a few more times before moving upwards, along his collar bone, over his neck to his jaw.

“Your time is up, professor. You have to go meet the big boss”, you whisper next to his ear. He groans.

“I’d much rather play with you some more.”

“That’ll have to wait.”

You pull back a little until you can look him in the eyes. He looks sleepy and very horny. As if the bulge in his pants hadn’t already given him away.

“Would you like to come to my apartment tonight? I’ll cook us something.”

“Gladly.”

You exchange phone numbers; he sends you his address and you agree on you coming over at 7.

Instead of more time at the library, you head home to prep for the night. You haven’t been on a date in months, and you look forward to it. You choose a black dress that shows off a decent amount of cleavage and has a swirly skirt.

A few hours later you stand in front one of the chicest apartment high rises in the city. You have to check in with a security woman at the desk.

“I’m Ms. y/n y/l/n. Professor Park should be expecting me.”

“He is”, she says after consulting with a screen. “Go on up. He’s on floor 17.”

Which turns out to be one of four penthouses. You know the professor salary at your university is decent, but nowhere near this good. You ring the bell outside his door and wait, nervously tapping your foot.

The door opens.

Jimin stands in front of you in a white apron, black slacks and a dark red shirt that looks like sin.

“Come on in. I have something on the stove.”

You walk in and take off your shoes. Almost instantly, you get enveloped by one of the most delicious scents you’ve ever smelled. Moments later, you join him in the kitchen. He looks right at home here, juggling pots and pans, adding a pinch of salt here and some pepper there.

“You can cook.”

“I can. My former roommate and I drew straws concerning who had to cook and who had to clean. I didn’t get the cooking one, but he nearly poisoned us twice. So we swapped and I learned how to cook a good meal.”

“That’s a good story. Can I help with anything?”

“No, thanks, darling. Everything’s done.”

He turns off the stove and turns to you.

“Now I can give you a proper greeting, if you’re okay with that.”

You’re perplexed for a moment but recover quickly.

“Sure.”

He steps forward and cups your cheeks. His face is less than 10 centimeters from yours.

“Thanks for coming today.”

“Well, you did say something about anatomy lessons for special students. And home-cooked food.”

His eyes nearly disappear as he smiles.

“Good to know you have your priorities straight.”

He moves in for a very gentle kiss, barely more than your lips touching for a few seconds. You look at his lips as you draw apart. They are so soft and plump.

You look at his eyes. He’s observing you with a fond smile.

You decide to risk it and move towards him again. Clearly, he’s more than willing to kiss you again. You gently bite into his lower lip, at which he moans. It gives you an opportunity to meet your tongue with his.

It takes a few more minutes and several passionate kisses before your brain starts working properly again.

“Food”, you ask.

“Huh? Oh, yeah, food. Let’s eat.”

It’s a very pleasant meal. He’s an excellent cook and the conversation only halts when both of you are putting food in your mouths at the same time.

You find out that Jimin, as you’ve started calling him in your head, had a startup with his former roommate. One they sold before he finished his PHD. Clearly, he earned a pretty penny from it, but he doesn’t talk about that, nor does he brag.

“And what is your former roommate doing now?”

“He’s a stay-at-home dad for his twin daughters. They’re one and a half years old and the cutest little tyrants in the world.”

“Does he have a PHD too?”

“Yes. But not in the STEM field. He was always the face, the creative person, the charmer, the salesperson and marketer of our company. Though he was pretty good with some of the tech stuff too.”

“So, CEO Taehyung and COO Park?”

“You guessed correctly.” He looks at you with narrowed eyes. “Are you imagining me as the boss of a big company now? Bossing people around and stuff?”

You smile at him.

“Maybe I am. Though I think you’d only let out the bossy side when you really have to.”

“Want to see for yourself if that holds true?”

The sexy eyes and slight smile tell you exactly what he means. You pat your lips with the napkin. Under the table, you squeeze your thighs together.

“Well, I’m finished with dinner. Thank you, by the way. It was delicious.”

“Come here, love.”

He pushes back his chair, patting his lap. You do so and take your time letting your skirt ride up until you sit on him. His eyes and hands run over your arms, thighs, sides. He feels like a starved man.

“Any place you don’t want to be touched?”

“No, you can touch me where you want.”

You catch his hands and put them on your boobs. He groans and buries his face against your cleavage.

“I’ve been trying all night to be a gentleman and not look at your boobs too much. This is heaven.”

As if to confirm his words, his dick twitches under you. Satisfied with the reaction, you grind your hips down on him. He moans into your chest.

“I wore the dress so you would look.”

“If I’d known I would have looked a lot more.”

“Plenty of time to do so now”, you say, keeping up the grinding. He’s grown fully hard by now.

But instead of looking, he uses touch, dragging his full lips along the line of your dress. That turns into kisses. You enjoy every second of it. He clearly knows how to savor.

“May I?”

His hand has moved to your zipper.

“Please, do.”

He unzips the dress and you slide out of the top part. It falls down around your hips and your chest is suddenly on full display. You ditched the bra on purpose. Before you can do anything else, Jimin’s lips are on your nipples.

Your head rolls back as you keep grinding against his hard length.

The man has mad skills with his mouth and tongue. He has you orgasming in under three minutes, clinging to his shoulders and your thighs squeezing his slim hips.

Once he’s done with one nipple, he moves to the other and repeats the process. You’re nearly crying by the time you come again a few minutes later.

You can see the smirk even through heavy lids and a film of tears.

“No, not another time. It’s my turn now.”

You meet his lips for a kiss and practically rip open the buttons of his shirt. His skin is smooth and warm, the muscles underneath like marble.

You take one of his dark nipples between your thumb and index finger and twist. His hands on your hips tighten. You do it a few more times until he breaks the kiss.

“If you keep doing that, I’ll cum, love. I’d much rather do that in you than in my pants.”

He pulls a foil packet out of his pants. You hold out your hand. He hands it to you, then opens his pants. No underwear. You wonder if he normally wears underwear. With a smirk you open the condom and roll it onto his length. He’s girthy, but after two orgasms you’re definitely ready.

You raise your hips, push aside dress and underwear and slowly slide down on his length. Jimin’s head drops back as you do. He fills you nicely. You rock your hips back and forth a little until you’ve fully adjusted, before raising them up and dropping down again.

One of Jimin’s hands dives under your dress until he finds your clit and starts playing with it. With the right tilt of your hips, Jimin rubs against your G-spot repeatedly. You’re both panting within minutes.

“Can I – ah – take over from here?”

“Of course.”

Jimin picks you up and sits you down on a free space of the table. You lay down. He pulls both of your legs up until they rest against his chest.

Slowly, he pushes back into you. The rhythm he strikes up is smooth and deep at first, perhaps to give both of you a chance to regain your breath. You start playing with your clit.

Until he starts thrusting into you faster and faster. You go cross-eyed at the way that feels.

“Ahh, Jimin. Harder.”

So he goes harder.

You start spasming around him. The third orgasm hits much harder than the first two. You whine, clawing at the table.

Jimin follows moments later with a few more sloppy thrusts. He keeps holding onto your thighs, panting heavily.

Since you know that things can quickly get awkward during moments like that, you smile up at Jimin.

“Can I have a kiss?”

“Anything, love.”

You part your legs and sling them around his hips. Jimin bows down and you exchange some gentle kisses.

“That was… nice doesn’t seem like a good enough word.”

“Splendid?”

“Too posh.”

“Exquisite?”

“Hell yeah, it definitely was exquisite.”

Jimin smiles sleepily. You push a strand of hair out of his eyes.

“Do you want to watch a movie and cuddle on the sofa for a bit? In case you want another round tonight, I can tell you it’ll take at least half an hour for me to recover enough.”

“Sounds nice.”

That’s how you end up watching a comedy and snuggling together under a blanket. Jimin has changed into sweatpants and a t-shirt. You’re wearing one of his overlarge hoodies.

“Since you said I could have anything earlier, how about you cook me another meal soon?”

“On Friday?”

“Good.”

“I think you only like me for my cooking skills. And maybe my mouth and dick.”

He pouts. You laugh and then plant a kiss on those delectable lips.

“Actually, I liked you for your brain first. And maybe your ass.”

“If I hadn’t noticed you looking at it more than once, I would never have made the first move.”

“You saw that?!”

He only winks at you before pulling you into a drawn-out kiss. Looks like the half hour is over.

© musicloverxoxo7, 2022

Please do not copy, translate, or repost my work. Doing so will make you legally liable for stealing intellectual property.

#jimin smut #jimin fanfic #jimin x you #jimin x reader #pjm smut #bts smut #bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts imagine #female reader #students #bts au fic #pjm fanfic

[taechnological]

when i'm genuinely trying to study in class for once but some loud mouthed bish just won't stop babbling from the back row

#sorry too personal (i suddenly remembered my student days) #jimin #park jimin #bangtan #taechnological #bts

[chimmythicksfics]

Operation Love Masterlist

Pairings ~ nerdjiminxpopularreader

Synopsis ~ In order to get popular hot guy Jeon Jungkook to fall in love with her, Areum decides to befriend Jungkook's best friend and confidant, Park Jimin. Only there's a problem. He's the nerdiest guy in the whole school, a recluse, and he may or may not have a giant crush on her.

Warning(s)~ Maybe smut, angst, warnings will be specific to each chapter.

A/N ~ Hey guys this is the Masterlist for my first series Operation Love (name will be changed at some point. Send me ideas?). Just wanted to let you know I have no idea how many parts this story will have. This is my first time posting any of my writing so I’m working out a schedule still. I hope you like the story and please enjoy!

Part I - I Befriend a Nerd

Part II - I run away… again.

#jimin fanfic #jimin x oc #jungkook #college au #cute jimin #nerdy jimin #med student jimin

[lilprincegoo]

stuck somewhere in the middle by namuvoir

jimin/jungkook

Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Enemies to Lovers, Past Rape/Non-con, Healing, Alpha Park Jimin, Omega Jeon Jungkook, Blind Date, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Rich Park Jimin, University Student Jeon Jungkook, Artist Jeon Jungkook, Panic Attacks, Shy Jeon Jungkook, Eventual Smut, Park Jimin Being an Asshole

43k words

rating: E

when jimin, a self-titled rich bitch that refuses to be tied down to an omega, is sent on a blind date by his parents, he isn’t happy. then he meets jungkook and his entire world becomes tilted as he struggles with new feelings and admitting to himself that, maybe, jungkook is who he’s meant to be with.

#ship: jikook #au: a/b/o #enemies to lovers #omega jungkook #alpha jimin #au: fake dating #rich x poor #student jungkook #jimin ship #jungkook ship #ao3 #bts ficrec #bts fic rec

[chryblossomjjk]

wait why did nayeon and jungkook stop talking????

hi bby!! so they stopped talking a few weeks before him and oc started their lil schenanigans. they both agreed to a fwb no strings attached relationship so when nayeon started to catch feelings they came to a mutual decision that it was best to end things :) <3

#anon #fic: practice #after the party when he walked miss oc home #nayeon was like oof #y am i sad at the club rn lmao #but tis okay #shes dating law student jimin and they're much more compatible than her n jk #o.o #DONT THINK I FORGOT ABOUT LAW STUDENT JIMIN YALL LMAO #NO COME TF ON #LETS TALK ABOUT IT #YALL WANTED JK TO CRASH AND BURN DONT THINK KIKI FORGOT < #33 #oh what a time to be a fic writer lmao #p sure that energy w be back when dilf drops #eye- #bye

[darkjimxn]

Chapter 2: Busted [M]

Summary: “A manwhore and a junkie… it’s a match made in heaven.”

Pairing: Park Jimin x Reader

Genre: High School au, angst

Word Count: 8.9k

Warnings: 18+, substance use disorder/drug addiction, PTSD, child abuse, sexual content (not explicit), additional warnings might be added as story progresses

A/N: Sorry for taking forever to update, a lack of motivation and school are to blame :( On another note, thanks for that anon's kind words, comments like that really help to keep me motivated!

Jimin lurched upright as the sound of the door shuddering violently reverated around the room, his heart hammering wildly in his chest. For a fleeting moment, he was back in his childhood bedroom, watching his door be slammed against repeatedly while his father let out a string of threats from behind the wooden structure. 

But instead of his father bursting into the room, it was Taehyung, who looked exhausted and distressed. 

“Party’s over, get out,” he announced, pausing when he noticed who was sitting up on the bed, “oh, it’s just you.”

Taehyung looked into the hallway for a moment, shouting at someone to hurry up, before poking his head back into the room, “are you staying over? My parents won’t mind, you already know they love you more than me.”

Jimin chuckled, trying to mask his erratic heartbeat, “they won’t mind me, but what about her?”

Their gazes both dropped on you, who was still sleeping peacefully beside Jimin under the soft covers of the bed. He found it funny how Taehyung’s incessant banging hadn’t even caused you to stir in your spot. 

“Yeah no, definitely not. She needs to go.”

Jimin nodded, expecting as much, “I guess I can stay over tonight, just let me wake her up.”

“Great!” Taehyung declared, clapping his hands together, “but when you’re done that, sleep in the second bedroom, not this one. My parents would kill me if they thought I made you sleep in some random guest room.”

“Because I have parents!” He raised his voice suddenly so everyone rushing in the hallways could hear him, “I’m not one of those frat boys whose parents go on week-long business trips! Mine will be back in a few hours from a date, so everyone get out of my house!”

After watching Taehyung scurry back into the halls, Jimin turned towards your sleeping form. 

You were completely passed out as you laid on the mattress with the comforter covering half your face and a pillow fixed snuggly between your arms. The part of your face that Jimin could see was puffy from the few hours of sleep the two of you had managed. 

“Y/N?” He tried, repeating your name a few times. 

But the most you did was shift in your position, and even that had been at his last repeat of your name. With a sigh, Jimin shuffled closer to you, letting his hand rest on your bare arm tentatively while he called your name once again. 

It was only when he shook your arm when you finally shifted, “hm?”

“The party’s over, you have to go kitten,” Jimin answered. He felt you slipping back to sleep, causing him to catch your arm and pull you into a sitting position. 

The change in posture had you blinking lazily as Jimin’s figure appeared before you, top exposed and sitting up in the bed the two of you had apparently spent the night in. His orange hair was sticking out in multiple directions while his eyes were slightly squinted due to his sleepy form. 

The party’s over…

Party? Yes, party… there had been a party and then you and Jimin had sex and then the two of you had fallen asleep. 

Reluctantly, you turned to take in the rest of the room, which was still dark aside from the bedside table lamps and a sliver of moonlight which had escaped through the window. If the moon was still out, then that meant the two of you must have only slept for a few hours. 

“Hey,” Jimin spoke up after a couple of seconds, noticing your groggy form, “you good?”

You blinked a couple of times cluelessly, wishing instead to just burrow back into the sheets and sleep for days. Your body felt like an anchor: heavy and unwilling to move until a sturdy metal chain was ready to drag you out of the bed. 

“Did you come here alone?” He asked when you didn’t answer, assessing your state carefully. Your nod came after a few moments too long as your mind struggled to process his question. 

That made Jimin’s eyebrows furrow, “okay, I’ll take you home. It’s still pretty late in the night and I don’t think you can drive in this state.”

With that said, he pushed himself out of bed, the blanket falling to the floor to reveal his toned back as he began throwing on his clothes. It wasn’t until he was pulling his shirt over his head when you forced yourself to stumble to your feet and do the same. 

-

-

-

The cool air felt fresh against your skin as the two of you walked along the road quietly side by side. It had taken Jimin forever to get your address and car keys in order to drive you home, but once he had parked your car in front of your house, he only needed one look at the abnormally long distance between the separate driveway and the front door to decide that your exhausted form wouldn’t last two steps without him. 

Your house wasn’t like most, slotted between a row of other houses to form a crowded and organised community. Rather it was located far away from any neighbourhoods, and instead nestled between large acres of grassy land. Jimin would’ve guessed it was farmland, but in the dark he found it hard to make out any crops or barns with animals, so he couldn’t say for sure. 

That led to the two of you walking along a dirt-packed footpath, with Jimin keeping a firm hand on your arm to make sure you wouldn’t fall from exhaustion. It still irked him as to how you could still be so tired even now. Sure, you weren’t exactly running on a full night’s sleep, but the few hours you had managed should have been enough to ensure you weren’t a walking zombie. 

“Was it the sex?” He finally asked, “How can you be this tired?”

Even in your exhausted state you still managed to shoot him a withering glare. 

“If you had just let me take the Adderall earlier, I wouldn’t be like this.”

Jimin’s expression fell quickly, a sinking feeling in his stomach, “why? You don’t need it.”

“How would you know? I have a prescription,” you lied smoothly, “do you not believe in mental health, Park Jimin?”

You tried to remember what Adderall was actually used for to really sell your lie, but your mind was much too hazy to manage that level of thinking.

An amused scoff escaped Jimin’s lips, “really? What do you take it for?”

You almost groaned out loud as you went back to racking your brain. BPD? ASPD? IBD? Ugh, why did so many disorders exist in the first place?

“It doesn’t matter,” you finally huffed, giving up on the ability of your thoughts, “I don’t owe you my medical history anywa-”

Before you could finish your sentence, a pebble caught between the edge of your shoe and the dirt-packed ground, causing you to stumble. With how sluggish you felt, your face would have gotten some serious reshaping if it wasn’t for Jimin’s hand that kept you steady,

“The bottle didn’t have a prescription label with your name on it,” Jimin said, pulling you up, “you don’t have to lie to me.”

That made you groan, “if you’re going to tell me about the dangers of drugs and how I’m going to die alone I don’t want to hear it. I have no energy to deal with that right now.”

But to your surprise he didn’t say anything, even after the two of you had arrived at your front door. Instead, Jimin turned towards you, an unreadable expression evident on his face. Or maybe you were just too tired to make out the meaning of his facial features.

For a brief moment, his lips parted, hinting at an unspoken thought he might have wanted to express. But after a moment of silence, he ultimately closed his mouth, choosing instead to look away.

“Sleep tight, kitten,” he said finally, turning around and making his way back to the car without another glance, “I’ll see you on Monday.”

You watched him drive off, much too tired to think any more of the recent events. 

-

-

-

The next morning the shrill sound of your alarm was quick to spring to life, causing you to groan irritably. You slammed a pillow over your ear in a desperate attempt to block out the deafening noise, hoping that it would at least be enough to get you a few more seconds of sleep, but the soft barrier couldn’t do much to dampen the piercing screech. Frustrated, you threw the pillow off of you, letting it’s useless form fall to the floor. 

With the pillow gone, the first thing that hit you was the sunlight. It travelled into the room through your window, setting fire to your surroundings as if someone had accidentally brought the sun in here. It was too bright. Everything was too bright and too loud and too hot. 

Wishing for some semblance of peace, you finally turned towards your bedside table to pick up your phone and shut off the annoyingly loud alarm. It felt a little better, but it wasn’t enough. The sunlight was still so bright it hurt your eyes, while your body still felt heavy. And you were hungry too. So hungry you felt like you could eat a whole cow if you were given the chance. 

“God Adderall crash is such a pain,” you whined as you turned towards your bedside table and began rummaging through the drawers. You pushed past safety pins, hair ties, hairbrushes, some old papers…

Your eyebrows furrowed as you continued searching, but ultimately failed to produce a small white bottle that was your salvation at the moment. You just got a new bottle from Yoongi, where could it be?

You forced yourself to recount yesterday's events, ignoring your rumbling stomach and sore arms. The bottle had been in your pocket as you were leaving school, so it couldn’t still be there. Then you attended Taehyung’s party where you drank some beer and failed to find some drugs, so instead you had sex with Jimin-

You flopped back into your bed as the realisation came crashing down on you. Jimin. Park Jimin had taken your bottle and thrown it away. Your last tiny bottle of Adderall was now in a trash can in Taehyung’s house. 

Your body suddenly felt ten times heavier at the thought. The last time you were out of Adderall, you had to go through a week of fatigue, headaches, and an intense desire to eat everything in sight. You could not go through that again.

With newfound determination, you stumbled out of your room and down the stairs to enter the kitchen. Your goal had been to search the cabinets for some Adderall you might have stashed in the past for later, but the sight of the fridge had derailed that goal. You couldn’t help but grab yesterday’s leftover noodles and shovel them into your mouth as you simultaneously began searching the cabinets. You had to have at least one stash hidden somewhere in the house. 

Though the more you rummaged through the cabinets, the more frustrated you were becoming. They were filled with nothing but decade old spices and some granola bars you couldn’t help but eat alongside your noodles. 

Ultimately you huffed in frustration as you shut the last cabinet and collapsed onto the floor of the kitchen, still no Adderall in hand. Yoongi couldn’t contact you until the police were off his back and you didn’t have any other dealer you could go to. It had already taken you so long to find someone as trustworthy as him. What were you going to do?

Could you get your bottle back from Taehyung’s house? There’s no way that rich kid with a bunch of maids wouldn’t have already replaced all the trash cans in his house, and there’s no way you’d find your small white bottle in all that trash after a party. 

You munched on one of the granola bars as you tried to figure out some other solution to your problem, but with your mind going through withdrawal, it was pretty much useless. There was no hope.

As you sat tiredly on the kitchen floor, biting at your granola bar and finishing up the noodles, your gaze suddenly caught onto a flash of white near your fridge. Confused, you scooted closer to it.

Your eyes widened in excitement as you noticed a small white bottle wedged between the bottom of the fridge and the counter. You knew it. You knew there had to have been one bottle left.

But as you grabbed at the small container, it became apparent even to your unfocused mind that the bottle of Adderall was completely empty. Not even one pill for you to at least get through the day. 

Tired, still hungry, and mind foggier than ever, you just wanted to burrow back into your bed and sleep for the rest of the week. And you were about to do just that until the sound of the kitchen door slamming shut behind you caused you to flinch. 

“Y/N?”

The mind that was struggling to form even one thought suddenly froze altogether at the familiar voice. Eyes wide and bottle in hand, you slowly turned to find your father standing near the kitchen’s doorway. There was a white plastic shopping bag hanging from his hand as he first scanned your form on the kitchen floor, the granola bar wrappers on the dining table…

And then the empty bottle of Adderall in your hand.

Crap.

-

-

-

When Jimin thought of therapy, the first thing that usually came to mind was a minimalist living room with two neutral-coloured sofas, a matching coffee table, and an intrusive woman that was hell bent on finding out ‘how he feels.’

The sofas and coffee table were definitely no stereotype, confirmed by the beige couch he was sitting on now and the glass coffee table standing right before him. 

The intrusive woman, on the other hand, remained yet to be seen. 

Jimin’s gaze jumped around the room anxiously as his arms leaned against his knees, taking in the tall bookshelf that he assumed was filled with self help books, an abstract painting filled with strokes of blue, black, and white, and a window displaying the vast view of the city’s many buildings. 

He had been so preoccupied with scanning the window that the sudden sound of the door opening made him flinch. His head snapped towards the door behind him, revealing a woman in her late twenties walking into the room. She was dressed professionally, with a simple white blouse tucked into black dress pants, while her straight brown hair flowed freely beneath her shoulders. 

“Hello Jimin,” she greeted with a smile when she noticed his seated form, “you’re early. That’s good.”

Jimin greeted her back politely as he watched her take a seat on the identical sofa in front of him. Her sudden entrance had only increased the anxiety he felt towards the fact that he couldn’t see the door. If someone else were to walk through it quietly enough, he wouldn’t even know. Anyone could just sneak up on him just like that…

“I’m sorry,” he finally spoke up, unable to contain his anxiety much more, “could we- um, switch seats?”

Instead of confusion, there was only understanding apparent on the woman’s face, “of course.”

He thanked her as they changed seats. With both the window and the door in his sights he felt a little less anxious. 

Once everything had been settled, the woman gave him a warm smile, “my name is Lauren, and I will be your therapist for the duration of your sessions.”

“How long is this going to take?” Jimin couldn’t help but ask. He didn’t want to be rude, he knew Lauren was only doing her job, but for some reason her presence made him anxious. He felt like she could see through him and reveal every part of himself he’d much rather stay hidden. 

“This, as well as your future sessions, will be around fifty to sixty minutes long. During this time, we will be focusing on your feelings in reaction to the traumatic event, but we won’t be focusing on that too much today since I’ll be doing most of the talking.”

Lauren held up a binder that was sitting on her lap,“I’ll have your treatment manual in my lap and will be referring to it throughout our sessions to ensure I deliver the psychotherapy as it was prescribed. Please don’t hesitate to ask questions as the session unfolds.”

Jimin simply nodded, eyeing the beige pendulum wall clock that had barely moved since she had walked into the room. Seeing as only a minute or two had gone by, he knew this was going to be the longest hour of his life. 

Oblivious to his apprehension, Lauren began to give him an overview of what would normally go on in their sessions before she explained the outline of their current session. It wasn’t until she had moved onto a different topic when Jimin’s straying attention was caught once again. 

“According to your CAPS score, you met diagnostic criteria for PTSD, which is a mental health condition that often develops after experiencing a distressing event. PTSD is characterised by three clusters of symptoms: re-experiencing, avoidance and numbing, and hyperarousal. Could you give me some examples of symptoms you experience that would fall under any of these clusters?

There was a moment of silence as Jimin shifted uncomfortably, “I get frequent nightmares- that would fall under re-experiencing. And last night, for a moment, I thought I was back in my childhood room and my dad was banging against the door. Sort of like a mini flashback.”

Lauren nodded, encouraging him to continue.

“For avoidance and numbing… I try to avoid thinking or talking about what happened altogether. I also kind of feel detached from others, but I couldn’t really explain that in detail even if you asked me to.”

“As for hyperarousal symptoms…” Jimin paused, “Taehyung always tells me I keep my guard up a lot. I’ve also noticed that small things tend to startle me as well.”

Lauren nodded, “re-experiencing symptoms, like your nightmares, are related to hyperarousal symptoms, like your hypervigilance. Both of these symptoms usually elicit a desire to either avoid, become numb, or both. Ironically, trying to avoid or numb your feelings ends up maintaining, or even increasing, your PTSD symptoms. Which is why the more you avoid or numb, the worse your condition gets. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah, I guess,” he responded, eyeing the clock once again as her words flew over his head..

“Everyone has existing beliefs that encompass how they see themselves, others and the world. When these beliefs are challenged by things like traumatic events, people respond in different ways. Some might change their perception of the event to make sense of it and essentially blend it into their existing beliefs. This is a process called ‘assimilation.’ Another reaction can involve a process called ‘overaccommodation,’ which involves an individual drastically changing their entire belief system to make the traumatic event fit. Trauma usually affects various areas of beliefs, including safety, trust, power or control, esteem, and intimacy.”

“Another important thing to note is that if someone already had negative beliefs about these aspects before the traumatic event, the event could further reinforce those negative beliefs. Make sense?”

Jimin simply nodded, not entirely understanding much of what she was saying; he just wanted the session to be over with faster. It felt like his brain was going to explode with all the new information that was being thrown at him and his distaste only grew when she asked him to describe his upbringing. 

Even though he knew talking was all therapy was about, he really didn’t want to talk about his crappy past. He’s done a great job of pretending it didn’t exist up until now. 

“My dad did drugs all throughout my life,” Jimin forced himself to say, reminding himself that he had to at least give this thing a try if he wanted to get better, “ they were really hard ones too. They would make him have these hallucinations where he was convinced my mom was cheating on him, or that she and I were planning his downfall or something.”

“Because of that he used to beat my mom a lot, so badly she’d end up in the hospital sometimes. He tried to beat me too, to ‘teach me a lesson,’ but my mom would always protect me by diverting his attention onto her. She did that for the first seven years of my life before she decided that she’d had enough of being my human shield and ran away. My dad’s drug use got ten times worse after that, and with no one to stop him, he began beating me instead.”

Jimin’s gaze dropped to his fidgety hands, “I wonder if my mom left because she had gotten sick of raising me as well. I guess I was a little hyper for my age, maybe if I had been a more quiet and obedient kid she would’ve taken me with her when she left.”

He noticed Lauren write something down in her binder, but decided not to voice his curiosity. When she finished, she looked up at him with sympathy evident in her eyes. 

“I’m sorry you had to go through that Jimin, you didn’t deserve what your father did to you all those years.”

Jimin merely shrugged, though his gaze wouldn’t meet hers. 

“Many people experience traumatic events in their lives, but not everyone develops chronic PTSD symptoms. This is because of a concept commonly known as ‘stuck points.’ Stuck points refer to certain ways of thinking about trauma and about oneself, others, and the world that act as barriers to healing and moving forward. These patterns of thought basically keep a person ‘stuck’ in their distress and contribute to the persistence of PTSD symptoms. This is why the main goal of these therapy sessions will be to figure out what prevented your recovery.”

“But in order to achieve this goal, we’ll have to explore your trauma. Could you provide a five minute account of the traumatic event you experienced?”

That made Jimin scoff, “I got beat up several times a month for years. How am I supposed to pick one?”

“Which of those events do you think about the most? Which event do you dislike thinking about the most? Remember it doesn’t need to be detailed, just a brief overview of what happened.”

Jimin’s dread intensified as his restlessness only increased. But the session was close to ending soon. The faster he got this over with, the faster he could leave. 

“I get the most nightmares about the night my dad died,” he recounted emotionlessly, the pace of his words quickening, “I was in my bedroom with my girlfriend when my dad suddenly started banging against the door. I let him in, but realised he was hallucinating some insane story which made him hurt my girlfriend. I ended up taking a bat to his head which eventually killed him.”

“You did a great job sharing that with me,” she praised, “how do you feel after sharing that memory?”

“Like I want to leave,” he said honestly. 

Instead of taking offence, Lauren simply nodded in understanding. 

“‘Natural’ emotions are feelings that are proportionate reactions to experiences that have occurred. For example, if we’re placed in a dangerous situation, it’s natural to feel fear. The diminishing course of these emotions means that allowing ourselves to feel these natural emotions will eventually cause them to naturally dissipate. ‘Manufactured’ emotions, on the other hand, are emotions that we contribute in making through the frequency of certain thoughts. For example, if a person tells himself he’s ugly again and again, he will likely feel more and more anger towards himself. This is why another goal of therapy will be to figure out how you have been manufacturing emotions that are unhelpful to you.”

“So to summarise, the three major goals of therapy will be to, one, remember and accept what happened by not avoiding those memories and associated feelings. Two, to allow yourself to feel your natural emotions so that the memory can be put away without such strong feelings still attached. And, three, to balance beliefs that had been disrupted or reinforced so that you can stop manufacturing unhelpful emotions.”

The mention of ‘feeling his emotions’ made Jimin want to crawl out of his own skin. 

Lauren then put up a strong case for how important it would be for Jimin to do the out-of-session practice she’d be assigning him at the end of every session, emphasising that not doing those assignments would mean that Jimin would only be spending 1-2 out of 168 hours a week on his recovery, and that doing the assignments would help him reduce his inclination towards avoidance. His nods felt automatic as his gaze stayed fixed to the wall clock, urging its hands to move faster. Recounting his past had left him jittery and all he wanted to do now was lock himself in his room, away from the world and especially away from the therapy that he was disliking more and more every minute. 

But seemingly satisfied with his response, Lauren handed him a worksheet anyway, “your first assignment will be to write an Impact Statement about the meaning of the event you recounted today. This is not a trauma account. Rather, it’s simply designed to get behind the meaning of the event in your life and how it impacted your belief systems.”

He took a look at the worksheet, seeing that it only reiterated what Lauren had said to write in more detail, before hesitantly taking it from her outstretched hand. The two of them then exchanged a few pleasantries as he rushed through the doorway. 

Jimin couldn’t seem to run out of that place fast enough. 

-

-

-

Your muscles stayed frozen as your father continued to stand in the doorway of the kitchen, glare directed towards the white bottle in your hand. You couldn’t believe you had completely forgotten that he was coming home today, your mind too occupied with finding a solution to your current Adderall predicament, and now here he was catching you in the kitchen with an empty bottle of Adderall in your hand. 

You were so screwed.

Your father finally walked deeper into the kitchen before snatching the bottle from your fingers and inspecting it thoroughly.

“Is this what I think it is?”

“Listen dad, I completely forgot you were coming home tod-”

“We had a deal, Y/N,” he interrupted, crossing his arms, “what do you have to say for yourself?”

You pursed your lips, unable to put up any defence. He seemed to study your form in silence as you pushed yourself off the floor and opted to lean against the dining table instead, still much too tired to even stand on your own. Whatever he saw must have been pathetic enough for him to simply sigh instead of scold your ears off. 

“Forget it,” he huffed before turning around and making his way towards the porch. 

“Come on, I brought some food.”

-

-

“God, you know I hate the smell of weed dad,” you whined, waving a hand under your nose like it would do anything to dampen the putrid smell. 

The two of you sat on the porch overlooking the vast acres of land that surrounded your house comfortably, making use of the white plastic table and chairs that were at least a decade old. Usually you would appreciate the beauty of the view, with its luscious green grass, bright blue sky, and fresh airy breeze that were completely absent in the city. 

Today though you were miserable with withdrawal, so the green grass and blue sky were much too bright for your eyes, and the fresh air was obscured by the smoke coming out of the fat blunt between your father’s fingers. 

“I already told you the smell goes away after a few minutes,” your dad responded, “here, take some. It’ll help you feel less crappy during your Adderall Crash.”

Normally you would decline. You weren’t a fan of smoking, even if it was weed, since it always made you cough your lungs out. But with your current Adderall withdrawal and the prospect of having to feel this way for the next week looming over your head, you uncharacteristically accepted your father’s blunt before taking a long drag of the thing. 

Just like always, you had to cough it out for a moment.

“Ah, I feel like I’ve failed you as a father for not teaching you how to smoke properly.”

“Most fathers wouldn’t let their kids near this stuff in the first place,” you deadpanned. 

Your father was much too high at that point to take any offence to that and instead laughed. 

“So,” you began, wanting to change the subject, “how was work?”

He took a moment to answer, “work’s work. I drive a giant truck here and then I drive a giant truck there. Drove a little farther away than usual yesterday. The view was incredible, like something straight out of Narnia”

You nodded, beginning to feel your mind and body relax from the drag you had taken earlier. You watched your father open the white plastic bag and bring out some takeout, announcing that he had gotten it on his way back home. He handed you a burger and fries as he brought out one for himself.

“So, care to explain to me why I found you on the floor of the kitchen with an empty bottle of Adderall in your hand?” Your father asked, taking a bite out of his burger. 

You threw a few fries into your mouth, chewing on the crunchy exterior while the inner softness melted on your tongue. Maybe weed wasn’t your thing, but even you had to admit that eating when high on the stuff was just another experience in itself. It had the power to turn even the worst fast food into the most delicious, five-star food known to man. 

“I’m out of Addy,” you finally admitted.

“Addy?”

“Adderall.”

“Right,” your father said, “I can’t keep up with the slang you kids keep inventing nowadays. But anyways, I figured that much. I meant to ask why?”

“I’m sorry dad, I know I promised that I’d get some for your friend since he’s been asking for it, but my dealer had to go in hiding because the police had been tipped off about him and now I don’t have any for myself much less your friend.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it,” your dad shrugged, not as annoyed by it as earlier. You weren’t sure whether it was because he’d gotten over it or because he was high. 

It was probably the latter.

“You wouldn’t happen to know anyone that could get some for me would you?” You asked hopefully, though the weed was making you feel a lot less concerned about it at the moment. 

Unfortunately your dad just shook his head, “my plug doesn’t really deal the small stuff like Adderall. I can give you some Ritalin though? I have a prescription for it for my job. I heard it’s basically the same thing.”

“I’ve heard the same,” you thought for a moment. Honestly you were desperate for anything at this point, “I’ll take it then. Thanks.”

“No problem, sweetheart.”

The two of you sat in silence for a moment, your relaxed minds taking in the scenery before you. Unlike earlier, you were starting to enjoy the sight of the fields, with its soft green grass and glorious sky. The soft breeze felt fresh against your skin as you continued to bite into your delicious burger. 

“By the way, what happened to your car? Did you take it to the mechanic or something?” Your dad asked absentmindedly, “I didn’t see it in the driveway.”

“What? Are you sure?” You asked as your eyebrows furrowed. Your car should’ve been parked in the driveway since the party last ni-

You suddenly stumbled to your feet, grabbing onto the railing when you felt a wave of dizziness hit your head. You hadn’t driven your car back home last night, Jimin did. But he had left your house driving a car too. That meant…

A gasp slipped from your lips as you rounded a corner, scanning the empty driveway now standing before you. Aside from your dad’s enormous truck, your black compact Toyota was nowhere in sight. 

“He stole my car,” you realised incredulously. 

That bastard stole your car.

-

-

-

“Jeez Y/N calm down, you’re shaking the whole table,” Namjoon whispered, eyeing the teacher as she continued to lecture the class.

You were seated in your last period classroom, practically counting down the seconds as you waited for the bell to finally dismiss the absolute nightmare of a day you were having. When you had asked your dad for some Ritalin, you had expected him to hand you Ritalin. Whatever he had actually given you had to be far from it though, because there was no way anyone would subject themselves to what you were going through. 

Since the morning you’ve felt like a ticking time bomb, too much energy packed into a single human being. You couldn’t stop moving, which was evident in your persistently shaking leg and constantly fidgeting fingers. Technically you did manage to focus in class, but it had taken a lot more energy than you usually needed to compared to when you were on Adderall. 

At this point, you were just waiting for the awful effects to wear off, but you didn’t know whether your father had given you the extended-release form or the immediate-release form. You hoped it was the latter because you could not endure this for another 7 hours. 

“Are you okay, Y/N?” Namjoon asked, laying a hand on your finger. You hadn’t even realised you had started tapping against your desk anxiously. 

“God, I’m so jittery right now,” you admitted, willing time to go faster, “I shouldn’t have taken that Ritalin.”

Namjoon’s gaze narrowed as he let out a frustrated breath, “of course it’s the drugs. Why should I even bother thinking otherwise at this point?”

Choosing to ignore the comment, you tried to calm your shaky hands to no avail. As if you weren’t anxious enough, now Namjoon’s frustrated, and slightly worried, gaze drilled into the side of your head. 

Thankfully, the sound of the bell reverberated around the classroom a few minutes later, signifying the end of the period. The second the teacher dismissed you all with a wave of her hand, you were out the door, ignoring Namjoon’s inquiries about where you were going. You may have been the most energetic you’ve ever been in the past few years, but you still hadn’t forgotten that there was something important you needed to do. 

So you pushed past the hundreds of students beginning to crowd the hallway, searching through a sea of maroon and dark grey uniforms for a certain orange-haired menace. You’d seen him in your second period, taking advantage of his seat that was directly behind you by annoying you to no extent throughout the class. Then the coward had left class 5 minutes early so that he didn’t have to face your wrath after the bell rang. 

Your only option now was to search for him after school, which you did in the cafeteria, gymnasium, and a bunch of classrooms, but he was nowhere in sight. You were even debating checking out the principal's office in case the idiot had gotten himself detention. 

Fortunately you didn’t need to make a fool of yourself in front of any school faculty when you turned into a relatively deserted hallway and noticed a flash of orange. 

You found Jimin standing with his back towards a row of lockers, speaking casually with a frustrated-looking Taehyung. He looked really angry, though you weren’t close enough to hear what they were talking about. Despite his friend’s evident irritation, Jimin seemed completely nonchalant. The first few buttons of his uniform had been undone, revealing a sliver of his toned collarbone while his tie hung loosely from his neck. 

But you pushed Jimin’s good looks and Taehyung’s frustration aside, opting instead to march up to the man you’ve been searching for. 

When you were close enough, his gaze finally noticed your form, eyebrows raising for a moment before a smirk overtook his features. 

“Well, look what we have here. What’s wrong, ki-”

But you had no desire to entertain the jerk for any longer than you needed to. Instead, you grabbed his collar, surprising Taehyung who hadn’t even realised you were there, and dragged him through the hallway before entering the school’s only gender neutral bathroom. The door slammed shut behind you as you focused your glare onto him. 

Jimin merely chuckled.

“If you wanted round two so badly, you only had to ask, kitten.”

Maybe it was the Ritalin that was fueling your irritation, because the sound of that nickname had you a lot more annoyed than usual. 

“My car.”

Jimin leaned against the bathroom wall, crossing his arms as he scanned your form. 

“Come again?”

“You stole my car,” you spat, trying to contain your annoyance. You felt like you had so much energy, mixed with anger that was a dangerous combination.

“Your car,” he said finally, a hint of amusement in his voice, “I have it, yes.”

His nonchalance wasn’t helping either. 

“Just because you drove me home that night, doesn’t mean you have permission to steal my car. You think you get to have something like that just for being a decent human being? I could’ve called a cab if I wanted to you know-”

You paused when you noticed his smile widen, clearly amused by your anger. This jerk…

“I can call the police for this, Park Jimin. Just because you gave me a good time once doesn’t mean I’ll feel guilty for having you arrested for taking my car. Have fun in jail you as-”

“I didn’t take your car because I wanted it,” Jimin interrupted, pushing himself off the wall before making his way towards you. It was only then when you realised that he wasn’t wearing his blazer, only the standard white button up that struggled to hide his toned body. 

“I took your car,” he continued, stride ending right in front of you, “because I wanted you.”

That made you scoff.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

You hated the way his proximity made it so much easier for your gaze to travel down his neck and linger at his collarbone. It was bringing back memories from the party, so much so that you could practically feel his plush lips on your skin as you stared at him now. The ghost of his hand rubbing circles into your waist also did not go unnoticed by you. 

“It means that I wanted to see you again,” he reiterated, his own gaze dropping to your lips, as if he were having the same thoughts. 

You watched his hand disappear into his pocket and return with your car keys before placing them in your hand.

“Your car’s in the parking lot,” he said in a low voice, still focused on your lips, “you can go to it right now.”

But you felt stuck under his gaze, unable to rip your own away from the movement of his plump lips as he spoke. You remembered the feeling of them on your lips, how good it felt when they had brushed against the bottom lip roughly.

Seeing that you weren’t moving, Jimin let his arms trap you against the door, bringing his face closer to yours as he whispered, “or you could stay here with me. Would you like that, kitten? To stay here with me and see what happens?”

At this point, he was so close you could feel the heat from his body on yours. The images from that night were fueling your lust. There was no doubt that that night had been amazing, and now here Jimin was giving you a chance at feeling that all over again. 

Hesitantly, your fingers hovered just above his shoulders before you let them slowly travel down to his chest. You watched his muscles tense under your touch, an oddly vulnerable reaction from a guy like him.

You shouldn’t…

You really shouldn’t…

But why? Because Jimin is a prick that you can barely stand? Because the thought of giving him exactly what he wants makes you want to put yourself in timeout? He stole your car for god’s sake. He annoyed you during class.

But he’s so hot. 

How could you be expected to ignore the sharp lines of his jaw? The muscled expanse of his strong shoulders and chest? The deep resonance of his voice? You can’t. Not when all of it is standing right in front of you, shooting you with a gaze that could light you on fire. 

It’s not like you’re agreeing to date, you thought. Sex is just sex, and you’re sure Jimin has it with a bunch of other girls all the time. It would barely mean anything to him. It would definitely mean nothing to you. 

You felt your hand continue to travel up his skin until it stopped at his neck, waiting for you to make another move. You probably should’ve pushed him away. Told him you weren’t that easy. 

But instead your fingers wrapped around his already loosened tie and slowly pulled him closer until his nose was barely an inch away from yours. The words that left your mouth next had a hint of a whisper in them. 

“You’re a jerk, Park Jimin.”

That was the closest to a ‘yes’ he was going to get from you. You had to keep some semblance of dignity. The man stole your car after all. 

The bathroom reverberated slightly at the sound of a click as Jimin locked the door behind you before you pulled him closer, allowing him to finally catch your lips with his. 

Your stomach burst at the feeling of his plump lips gliding against yours in a heated frenzy, one hand holding your cheek steady as the force of his kiss pushed you against the bathroom door. It was clear that the Jimin before you today was eager and impatient, unlike the Jimin that had taken his time that night at the party.

Right now, you couldn’t help but like it.

The hand holding your jaw pulled your face closer to his, deepening the kiss, while his other hand travelled down, brushing delicately against your neck, before grabbing at your waist. In that moment, Jimin’s tongue slipped into your mouth, exploring the space with a hunger that only rattled the butterflies flying wildly in your stomach. You felt him trace the inner lining of your lips, caressing your tongue- the action causing you to yelp unexpectedly in his mouth. As surprising as it was, you wanted him to do it again. 

Jimin pressed you against the door once again, the rough surface hard against your back, but this time all you could do was pull him into you more, encouraging him to continue dragging his tongue across your mouth. You basked in the heat of his chest so close to yours, the feeling of his hand on your waist, the sensation of his tongue on yours. You couldn’t seem to get enough. He knew exactly what to do and how to do it. Every passing second had you regretting your decision less and less, no matter how annoyed you still were at him. 

Distantly, you felt his middle finger rubbing circles into your waist. 

Jimin broke the kiss for a moment, filling the bathroom with heavy pants as the two of you were allowed to catch your breaths. Your fingers hovered over the buttons of his dress shirt, desperate to start opening them for the view you knew wouldn’t disappoint. 

Jimin, clearly noticing your impatience, let a breathy laugh escape his lips, “relax, kitten. I’ll have you moaning my name like a broken record soon enough.”

That had you scowling, which of course only seemed to amuse Jimin even more. You huffed, knowing your next words would come out weakly before they even left your lips. 

“We’ll see about that.”

-

-

-

“You were such a jerk for that.”

You faced the bathroom’s mirror as you finished adjusting your uniform so that it at least partly resembled itself before you had walked into the bathroom. Jimin had, unfortunately, succeeded in his earlier promise and more, which had you too embarrassed to turn around and face said man who you knew was just a few steps behind you. He'd practically taken every ounce of dignity you had left, and you had given it to him on a silver platter.

If only dignity felt as good as him. 

As if Jimin had heard your thoughts, he replied, “I made it worth your while, didn’t I?”

You could see him in the corner of the mirror, a sly smile plastered over his face as he peered at you through the mirror the same way you were watching him. It didn’t occur to you until now just how good his face would look with a soap dispenser thrown at it. 

To your surprise, he didn’t leave right after he had fixed up his uniform. Instead, he walked over to you before slightly pressing into you, the heat from his chest spreading to your clothed back as he leaned his arms on the sink. You could feel his breath on your neck as his lips brushed against your ear. 

“But let’s make one thing clear, kitten,” he breathed as the words caught your attention, his focus intense even though he was still holding your gaze through the mirror.

“The next time you want to go a round, you’ll have to ask for it. No ambiguous sex bathrooms or calling me a jerk to imply you want some. Just you. Asking me. Using your big girl words.”

“Only in your dreams will I want this again, Park Jimin,” you shot back so quickly you didn’t even have time to wonder what the hell ‘sex bathroom’ was supposed to mean. The fact that he thought there was going to be a next time was laughable. 

You simply got caught up in him and his looks this time. That’s all. This was not going to be a regular thing. You’d never let that happen. 

But Jimin gave you a knowing look, throwing your earlier words back at you, “we’ll see.”

You watched him reach in front of you, grabbing a few paper towels from the dispenser, before drying the hands he had just washed with them and then throwing them in the trash. Once that was done he finally stepped away from you, walking towards the door of the bathroom. 

He glanced at your state momentarily before opening it, “until next time.”

And, just like that, he was gone.

“Jerk,” you muttered, the word starting to gain a familiar spot on your tongue. 

After fixing yourself in the mirror one last time you walked out of the bathroom as well. To your surprise, Namjoon immediately ran up to you not a moment later. 

“I’ve been looking everywhere for you,” he panted, readjusting the strap of his backpack on his shoulder. But then his gaze shifted to behind you, seemingly noticing where you had come from, “why’d you use that bathroom? The only time people use it is for sex, you know that right?”

You turned to look back at the bathroom’s door, only now realising what ‘sex bathroom’ probably meant. Did Jimin think you had brought him in there on purpose? As some kind of ambiguous way of saying you wanted sex?

Oblivious to your thoughts, Namjoon ignored your silence, “whatever. Anyways I came here to tell you that you’re coming home with me today.”

That had you snapping back towards him, “what? No, I just want to go home and sleep off this Ritalin.”

Namjoon was shaking his head before you had even finished the sentence.

“Nope, you’re coming home with me and we’re finishing this math assignment together. Come on.”

“Wha-” He grabbed your arm before you could whine anymore and began dragging you behind him.

“Namjoon!”

-

-

-

“Where have you been?” Taehyung asked frustratedly as he watched his best friend make his way towards him. He had no clue where you had dragged him off, and honestly? He was too mad to care.

Jimin, on the other hand, seemed perfectly untroubled, ignoring Taehyung’s furrowed eyebrows and crossed arms to instead open up his locker. The question floated aimlessly in the deserted hallway for a moment before he huffed loudly.

“Don’t you have anything to say?”

Taehyung’s eyes widened as Jimin brought a textbook out of his locker, closed it, and then began walking towards the school’s exit. 

“Dude?!” He huffed incredulously, trailing Jimin from behind, “I’m talking to you!”

“And I’m ignoring you,” Jimin deadpanned. Taehyung felt himself take several steadying breaths to calm himself down, trying for a less aggressive approach.

“We were having a conversation before.”

“No, you were being tenacious. And I was trying to ignore you.”

“You’re not fine, Jimin!” Taehyung suddenly exploded, secretly thankful that the hallway was deserted, “you think I can’t see it? You think I’ve been blind these past few months?”

That had Jimin turning around, eyebrows furrowed, “what are you talking about?”

“Don’t act oblivious,” Taehyung spoke sharply, “you haven’t been sleeping properly. You’ve been pushing me away. You haven’t been okay for months- wait, no. Who am I kidding, you haven’t been okay for the past 3 years. But it’s never been this bad, Jimin. It’s been getting wor-”

“Okay,” Jimin interrupted, holding up a hand, “where is this coming from? I’ve been sleeping fi-”

“I heard you that night. At the party.”

“Wha-”

“When you came back from dropping Y/N off,” Taehyung admitted, eyes softening, “I could hear the nightmares, all of them. It’s never been this bad, Jimin.”

Jimin froze, eyes wide for a moment before he forced out a hesitant laugh, “you sure it was a nightmare? Because nightmares aren’t the only kinds of dreams that can have someone panting li-”

“Stop it,” Taehyung snapped, his voice nearing anger now, “stop using that mask on me. You can be carefree and flirty with anyone else, but we’re best friends. I know you better than that. Don’t insult me.”

Jimin let out a frustrated breath, very much tired of this conversation, “then what do you want, Taehyung?”

“What do I want? I want you to open up to me. Things have been getting worse, and yet the worse they get the more you shut me out. Just talk to me, man. Get some stuff off your chest. You can trust me. You know I’m not one to spill secrets to others.”

“I’m fine, Taehyung.”

“No, you’re not.”

Jimin ran a hand through his hair frustratedly. Taehyung has always cared about him so much, too much, for so many years. He gave Jimin a place to stay every time his dad kicked him out of the house. He never judged him for the bruises and scars littering his skin. He’s always made himself available for Jimin whenever he needed to vent about how crappy his life truly was. 

And he’s continued to help Jimin, even after his father died-

No.

After Jimin murdered him. 

Taehyung, of course, knows what went down that night. Maybe not every exact detail, because Jimin had just barely managed to tell him the watered down version of the story before he was a shaking heap of laboured breaths on the floor. But Jimin knew. He knew the look Taehyung had given him after hearing the story. 

Taehyung had judged Jimin. 

Taehyung had seen Jimin for who he really was that day. 

A murderer. A cold-hearted killer that had murdered his own father like it was nothing.

And yet, still, he’s been determined to stay by Jimin’s side. He’s always cared for him despite what his true thoughts of Jimin were. Taehyung’s heart was too big. And Jimin knew he was too undeserving of it. 

“As if the therapy wasn’t enough,” he mumbled, pushing the thoughts out of his mind. It was harder to push the mixed emotions starting to strain his chest.

Taehyung rolled his eyes, “as if you’re actually going to that.”

But Jimin’s silence had Taehyung’s eyes widening suddenly.

“Wait… You actually went?”

Hiding his hands in his pocket, Jimin nodded, feeling kind of vulnerable admitting that out loud. But he might as well let Taehyung know he was taking it seriously considering his parents were the only reason he could even afford to think about therapy. 

To his surprise, a wide grin suddenly replaced Taehyung’s prior frown. He rested a hand on Jimin’s shoulder, “that’s great, dude! I’m really proud of you, seriously. I’m sure it’ll really help.”

Jimin couldn’t meet his eyes.

He hoped Taehyung was right. 

Next Chapter...

#jimin high school au #jimin fanfic #jimin x reader #bts x reader #jimin fic #bts au fic #bts au #jimin #park jimin #bts jimin #jimin bts #high school student jimin #bts fic #jimin angst #jimin smut #jimin x y/n #bts series #jimin series #jin #yoongi #namjoon #hoseok #taehyung #jungkook #seokjin #suga #rm #jhope #v

[zzzzzestforlife]

this semester can kiss my ass goodbye

#studyblr #bumpy #i hate it here #finals season #finals week #bts #bts army #vmin #kim taehyung #park jimin #studying #student life #university life #university student #ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #i can't live like this #end me now #university

[xoxiu]

autumn outside the post office - jin x reader

chapter three table of contents masterlist

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≪ how long will beautiful things last? ≫

summary: it wasn't your fault that dr. kim was the most beautiful man you've ever seen. falling for him was entirely your fault, however. first semester at college and you're already dreaming of a student/professor relationship- so naughty and against the code of conduct. you like the thrill, though.

tags/warnings: smut, teacher!jin, college au, cute yet forbidden romance, daddy dom!jin, love triangles, frat boys jungkook and taehyung, age regression, age play, ddlg, spanking, eating disorders, mental health, first love, exhibitionism, lots of blowjobs, age gap

It was a downpour of rain while you waited for the bus. Everyone around you remained somewhat dry under their umbrellas, except for you. You were the dumbass who didn't have an umbrella. Alas, you had to brave the elements and hope you didn't get sick the next day.

The rain was so thick, you couldn't make out any of your surroundings. The post office across the street was just a blur, and the police office wall you leaned against was your only marker indicating you were at the right location. Car headlights shined brightly, reflecting off the water on the road. It was all quite calming, except for the fact that you were freezing and wet.

Thankfully, the bus came slightly before its scheduled time. You scurried on and took the closest available seat. Your sweatshirt stuck to your body as if it were glued on as you tried to remove it. Eventually, you managed to remove it, feeling less like a trapped wet dog.

The bus ride was 45 minutes to the main campus. Quickly, you ran to Hanson Hall with your sweatshirt over your head, trying to protect yourself from the rain. Of course, it did nothing. But it was better than nothing.

You arrived inside and immediately entered one of the giant lecture halls. You always sat in the back near the aisle for easy access to the exit. Chemistry was long and boring, so you took frequent 'bathroom breaks' whenever things got too slow.

Shuffling around in your backpack, you found your student ID for attendance. You went to the front of the lecture hall and scanned in, the teacher assistant smiling at you as you did so.

"Good morning, y/n," he said. He sat at the table where the card reader was, the professor standing at the podium only a few feet away. You liked the TA, Taehyung, and often saw him hanging out in your hall with Jimin. He always had an infectious smile on his face.

"Good morning!" You cheerfully replied before heading back up the stairs to your seat. You were rather early to class- students from the previous class were still piling out of the lecture hall. That didn't bother you too much, as you used the few minutes to catch up on emails on your phone.

One email caught your eye. It was from Dr. Kim, reminding the class about his office hours today. You completely forgot about stopping by to see him today. Thankfully, it was still a few hours until the designated time, so you didn't feel too bad about forgetting. As you scrolled through your inbox, you kept fantasizing about having that one-on-one time with Seokjin.

Class ended a few minutes late, at ten minutes to 1 pm rather than fifteen. That didn't bother you, it just meant less time to wait for Dr. Kim's office hours. As you exited the lecture hall, a loud crack of thunder echoed throughout the building. It was still storming outside. Lucky for you, you could get to Seokjin's office through the skywalks connecting Hanson Hall, the computing building, and the humanities building. It was quite the walk between the three buildings, so you would arrive perfectly on time.

You listened to your music as you walked through the buildings, trying your best to stick in with the other students heading for class. No one ever stopped and talked to each other in the busy halls, everyone rushed to the classes or stood along the walls waiting for the previous class to dismiss. It was nice, you thought, as it eliminated the bullshit that happened in the halls of your high school.

Finally, you arrived at Dr. Kim's office on the third floor of the humanities building. Taking a deep breath, you softly knocked on the metal door.

"Come in!"

You tried to tone down your happiness and excitement as you opened the door. Seokjin sat at his desk, staring intently at his laptop, wearing his eyeglasses. He gestured for you to sit on the chair opposite him, and you did as instructed. His office was filled with books- bookshelves surrounded his office that were filled with books amongst other knick-knacks. Next to your chair was a beanbag chair, and on the other side of you was a dog bed. Did Seokjin have a dog? He seemed more like a cat person. Another chair was located next to Seokjin's own, but it was currently stacked with papers.

"Ah, y/n. Thanks for stopping by," Seokjin leaned back in his chair with a smile. He stared you up and down with half-lidded eyes. You felt as if he was mentally undressing you. Blushing, you shuffled in your seat under his gaze.

"Hi, Dr. Kim. I just had a few questions about some things."

"Hmm, is that so?" You squirmed in your seat, mouth slightly parted in a pout. Seokjin was making it quite obvious- he was interested in you. Or maybe you were just projecting your own lust onto him. What you couldn't doubt were the wandering eyes as Dr. Kim looked you up and down.

"So, you, uh, mentioned that women wrote many works during the Joseon period. I was just curious as to what they wrote about," Seokjin nodded and smiled as you spoke, intrigued by your question. He cleared the papers off the chair next to him, placing them on top of another stack on his desk.

"Come sit over here. We'll look together."

You quickly moved over to the little yellow chair, desperate to get closer to him. He fiddled around on his keyboard, typing eloquently in Korean. You understood nothing that was on the screen, making you wonder why he wanted you to change location. Once he stopped typing, finding the website he was looking for, you looked up to see his face.

He looked very happy, almost excited to share his knowledge with you. It made you feel giddy inside- you were the one making him feel this way.

"Many of the women writers were royal and noble women. They wrote down details of their daily life, private thoughts, and personal situations. And then there were female storytellers. They didn't write down their stories, only told them orally. I found a few I'd like to translate for you."

You listened as he read off a poem in Korean. His voice sounded so soothing and beautiful as he spoke, so animated and passionate. Your heart fluttered with every word and syllable- and you thought you couldn't be more infatuated with him.

"Who'd say I'm not a beauty enough, and I'm good with a needle and loom," Seokjin began translating the poem, his voice just as silky and sultry as before. You felt him shuffle in his seat next to you, scooting his chair closer to you.

"But for I come from a poor family, no good matchmaker will see me," At this point, you weren't even paying attention to his words, only the cadence as he spoke. Looking up at him, you saw his beautiful dark brown eyes behind his glasses. They were so, so dark, but this close up you could see the tint of amber brown.

"Weaving without pause into the night, the loom sobs with cold clicks, the swathe of silk on the loom shall make some lucky lady's clothes," An arm snaked around your shoulders. Seokjin's hand rested on your shoulder furthest from him, embracing you in his warmth.

At that moment, your fate was sealed. In your heart, you knew Seokjin wanted you just as much as you wanted him. You thought back to your previous two class sessions with him, and couldn't help but remember the way his eyes would always linger on you a bit longer than normal. When you looked down to write your notes or read a handout, you felt his eyes watching you. It all made sense now.

"But with the scissors in hand, my ten fingers grow stiff this cold night-"

In a blaze of passion, you turned and held Seokjin's face in your hand, turning it ever so slightly to face you. You closed your eyes, giving him a gentle and passionate kiss on his lips. His eyes grew wide in surprise, backing away from the kiss.

You panicked- was this not what he wanted? Maybe he didn't like you, and he just had a very flirtatious personality. Fearful, your eyes widened as well as you lowered your hand. Apologies spilled from your mouth, only to be hushed by his mouth back on yours.

The kiss deepened, his hands reaching towards your bottom, massaging it roughly before picking you up. He placed you onto his lap, never breaking the kiss, and you now straddled him. Eventually, Seokjin pulled away, both of you breathless.

"Dr. Kim, I-" you spoke first, trying to further apologize as embarrassment overcame you. You sat on your literature professor's lap- this was not normal.

"God, you're fucking beautiful," he placed his forehead against yours, giving you another quick peck on the lips. "I've been waiting for this, y/n. I'm so glad you took the initiative."

He brushed a hand through your hair, admiring your soft curls from the rain. He took a moment to take in the sight of you. Your red face, plump red lips, and glassy brown eyes. Perfect and disheveled, just for him.

A knock on his office door made you jump. Both of you quickly turned towards the door, hoping whoever was out there didn't barge in.

"Just a moment!" Seokjin called out. He looked back at you with a smile, making no attempt to remove you from his lap. One last peck on the lips, and you removed yourself from him.

You straightened out your clothes and grabbed your bag, giving a quick goodbye before exiting his office. On the other side of the door was Cara, who looked equally as surprised as you.

"y/n, I didn't take you as the type of student to come to office hours!" Cara said, her voice leaking with fake niceties. "I guess you should be going, huh?"

The evil, jealous glare on her face was evident, hidden behind the mask of faux happiness. She knew what you were up to because she was trying to be the same way. She shoved past you, giving Dr. Kim a pretty smile.

As you went to close the door, you took notice of Cara's outfit. She wore a white button-up blouse with a little black bow and a black skirt that rode up to mid-thigh as she sat down. Her shirt, however, was completely wet. It was now see-through, allowing everyone to see her little pink lace bra, and how her boobs spilled over in them. You gave one last glance to Dr. Kim, who now gave his attention to Cara.

Dr. Kim was a hot commodity.

#bts fanfic #seokjin x reader #kim seokjin #teacher/student #bts smut #college au #kim namjoon #min yoongi #jung hoseok #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook #bts #autumn outside the post office

[indigoandochre]

So I’ve taken a brisk walk around - leaving my smial of opera, ELO, and 70s rock - and now I’ve come to a conclusion.

BTS is good music.

#BTS #you've got another one #like holy shit #I didn't think I liked R&B or rap #and now I'm here #I know who my bias is #I've woken up with a different BTS song stuck in my head every day #because they're all good #and they can do some wild-ass dancing #their technique is better than my fellow opera students #literally ever single one of those opera students #me included #Taehyung is a smooth Baritone and makes me feel like I'm underwater #Jimin's voice is like being above the sun-drenched cumulous clouds #Jungkook's runs make me jealous #And then we have the genuinely deep lyrics #and they're very politically outspoken! #they've put so much good into the world #I'm genuinely mad with myself that I pre-judged them so hard #Just because they're a boy band #and some of their fans are THE WORST #But nah It took being super depressed and making friends with a long-time ARMY #for me to see the error in my ways

[chimmyxkookies]

🔷𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑩𝒆𝒕🔷 🔸𝑪𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒆𝒅 🔸4𝗸 🔸https://archiveofourown.org/works/36454342 ❀ Jikook/kookmin ❀ Unrequited Love ❀ Hurt ❀ Angst

#BTS Fanfiction #Jikook Fanfiction #Jikook #Jikook FF #Chimmyxkookies #Chimmy_Loves_Kookies #Bad Boy Park Jimin (BTS) #Heartbreak #Heart breaker Park Jimin #University Student Jeon Jungkook #University Student Park Jimin (BTS) #bet #One-Sided Love #Painful Love #Angst #College AU #Students Jungkook and Jimin #Rich Park Jimin #Bitter sweat in a way #Happy Ending #Jikookau #Kookminau #Jikook au

[bangtanbapple]

Untitled Namjin AU (heart guy) By namjintellect (twitter)

Author description: where a guy in namjoon's class keeps pulling out hearts out of nowhere every time they make eye contact

Group: BTS Main ship: Namjin Other ships: Vminkook, Sope Chapters: 42 (Complete)

#bts fic rec #bts smau #posted on twitter #complete #mainnamjin #namjinau #vminkookau #sopeau #schoolsetting #student!namjoon #student!seokjin #poly relationship #poly!jimin #poly!jungkook #poly!taehyung

[changguscomet]

my students said they want to practice listening to more natural english conversations and one of them said she struggles to understand interviews between late night talk hosts and famous people so I was like bruh we can do that and now I'm looking for interviews that are good for their level and I'm finding a lot of them with kpop groups so like ... why not

#honestly the one jimmy fallon did with jimin is pretty good #like from an esl standpoint #and jimin's not a native english speaker either so it might make my students feel somewhat more confident #if that makes sense #idk I'm excited but like also scared #it's been a while since I've planned lessons out of my own brain #I've been using lots of premade online modules because I'm lazy #but this requires proper work and thinking and it might be difficult #but I think it'll be fun #I'm going to make them act out their own interview as a speaking assessment as well #personal