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#stupid six songs all being bops >:( /j
donnieluvsthings · 3 years
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if the last minute and a half of “all you wanna do” would get out of my head i would rly appreciate it
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aeipcthys · 3 years
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╰ ❛   💉 — › lucien laviscount. cis-male. he/him.  ╯ have  you  met  elijah wells  yet  ?  this twenty seven year old  leo  has  been  living  in the seattle  area  for  six months.  he  makes  a  living  as a surgical intern, which  is best suited for their outgoing,  resourceful,  ignorant,  and arrogant personality. tipsy by j-kwon  is  one of  their  favorite  songs.
trigger warnings: death, alcohol, drug mention
full character page here
BASIC INFORMATION
Full Name: elijah james wells
Nickname(s): wells, ej when he was a high school douche maybe
Age: 27
Date of Birth: july 23, 1994
Hometown: boise, idaho
Current Location: seattle, washington
Ethnicity: mixed (african-antiguan, white)
Nationality: american
Gender: cisgender male
Pronouns: he/him/his
Orientation: heterosexual, heteroromantic
Status: single
Religion: nah
Political Affiliation: he’s the type that doesn’t pay attention you know
Occupation: surgical intern
Living Arrangements: he has an apartment (a roommate????)
Language(s) Spoken: english
Accent: american
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE
Face Claim: lucien laviscount
Hair Color: dark brown
Eye Color: dark brown
Height: 5'11 (lies and says he’s 6′0)
Build: fit
Tattoos: yes, stupid things tbd
Piercings: none.
Clothing Style: fuck boy asdfsdjf
Usual Expression: 
HEALTH
Physical Ailments: none.
Neurological Conditions: we’ve got some childhood trauma
Allergies: none. 
Sleeping Habits: when he’s out he’s out
Eating Habits: he eats a lot, literally whatever he’s not a health nut
Exercise Habits: he works out never misses leg day
Emotional Stability: lol come on...why else would he be here
Sociability: he’s social 
Body Temperature: 98.6 F
Addictions: none.
Drug Use: yes
Alcohol Use: yes
PERSONALITY
Label: fuck boy is that a label
Positive Traits: humorous, outgoing, resourceful, confident
Negative Traits: ignorant, greedy, arrogant, selfish
Fears: ending up alone/without anything of substance
Hobbies: video games i’m sure
Habits: smoking, being an idiot
FAVOURITES
Weather: sunshine babeyyy
Colour: dark colors idk yet
Music: bops only
Movies: movies are long he only likes stupid ass ones
Sport: this dude likes NASCAR can you believe it
Beverage: beer probably, always enjoys a beveragino
Food: all
Animal: he has a beta fish
FAMILY
Father: idk i forgot to ask angie
Mother: lily wells (deceased)
Sibling(s): rebecca goldmann (half-sister)
Children: none.
Pet(s): none.
Family’s Financial Status: lower class
EXTRA
Zodiac Sign: leo
MBTI: enfp
Anything Else:
BIO
Elijah James Wells was born to a couple of teenagers in the summer of 1994. Despite his father being in another relationship with another woman, Lily was essentially his rebound girl. His rebound girl that, of course, quickly turned into the woman carrying his child. Lily didn’t know at the time that the man she had hooked up with was *also* having a child with another woman in Calgary. Lily had only been visiting Canada on a semester abroad when she became pregnant, opting to return to her home in Idaho following it. She wasn’t sure, at first, if she wanted to keep the baby, being so young and all. But the thought of having a child grew on her, and eventually, she decided to keep him.
At first, Elijah’s father had no intention of being apart of his life. Lily knew that if she decided to keep the baby, she would most likely be raising him on her own. But, that was alright with her. She’d have her older sister to help her out. As far as she was concerned, Elijah’s father was off the hook. That was, until, there were complications during Elijah’s delivery. Complications that ended up claiming Lily’s life. At that point, Elijah’s father felt an obligation to take custody of Elijah, even though he had no clue what being a parent entailed.
Elijah grew up living with his father, but he wouldn’t consider him to be the man who raised him. His father was in and out, unsuccessfully trying to balance being young and having a young child. Lily’s sister Pamela stepped up, being in her mid 20s at the time Elijah was born. His father definitely took advantage of her, relying on her more than anyone to take care of Elijah. Pam even financially supported them from time to time when he struggled to hold down a job. And because of this being one of the only constant presences in his life, Elijah gravitated to Pam. Hers being the closest relationship he’s ever had.
As Elijah got older, his resentment towards his father grew. He had no problem being vocal about the lack of *fathering* the man had done. And just like many other troubled kids, Elijah began to act out. He became the kid who was often sent to the principal’s office. So much so, that his father stopped showing up when they’d call him, forcing Elijah to wait there for hours on end. This only angered Elijah more. His behavior continued, stretching through to high school where he fought to raise his social status. He thought even if his life felt like crap on the inside, he would put together an attractive exterior. So he did, hanging out with the jocks and attending high school parties. Drinking, smoking, all of it was part of his weekend routine. And he fought with his dad about it. Constantly. Elijah didn’t even care about school…that was, until his father told him he would end up just like him. That made Elijah want to do better just to spite him. And what was the most impressive thing he could think of? Being a doctor. So that’s what he would do.
Elijah wasn’t any impressive kind of smart. He was average, but thanks to some connections, his aunt was able to get him into a pre-med program in Atlanta. Elijah went to school and did a lot of the same crap that he had been doing in high school, only on a bigger scale. He was the guy at frat parties, different girls coming and going from his dorm room at all hours. He was a nightmare of a roommate *and* a student. Elijah really had to scrape his way by, by whatever means necessary. He wasn’t above cheating or doing the bare minimum just to get by. He tried his best in the important classes. At least, that’s what he would tell you.
Elijah continued on to medical school by the skin of his teeth. His program had a high acceptance rate, and if it wasn’t for that, he probably wouldn’t have gotten in. He was lucky in that way, and although he tried to keep up, even there Elijah found himself falling behind. He constantly had to rely on other people to make his work look better. Sometimes this worked for him, sometimes it didn’t. But it became clear to him if something didn’t change, Elijah wouldn’t have a hope of finding a good match for his residency. So, he did what he knew how to do. Found a way around the system.
When it came to take Step 2 of the United States Medical License Examination, Elijah payed someone else to take the exam for him. That combined with a good essay about his upbringing resulted in Elijah’s match at the SGMW surgical residency program.
CURRENTLY
Elijah knows very well that he is not unto par, but he feels like he’s cocky enough to distract from it. He’s just scraped all of his life, so what’s to stop him from doing that now? He needs to become a surgeon, both to show up his father and give back to his aunt. There’s no other alternative for him. 
Although he’s serious about making it, that doesn’t mean he won’t have a little fun while he’s in Seattle. Elijah is an arrogant, fuck boy type, who won’t hesitate to hit on anything that moves. He’s just here to have a good time…unless someone insults him, because that would probably piss him off.
Just like finding out that he has a half-sister (aka Rebecca Goldmann) might do. But only time will tell.
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blackhakumen · 4 years
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Mini Fanfic #432: Ace Pop-Offs (Phoenix Wright)
Apollo Justice
Theme of Voltron Plays.......
Apollo: (Cheers Triumphantly from his Seat) YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!! I am Apollo Justice, The Champion of MARIO PARTYYYY!!!
Ema: (Rolled her Eyes) Calm down, Justice. It's just a video game.
Apollo: (Begins to Blush a Little Once He Finally Starts Calming Himself Down) Right..... (Chuckles Awkwardly) Sorry about that...
Klavier: (Chuckles Lightly) Goodness, Herr Forehead. I had no idea you had all of this much energy of excitement in you.
Wocky: Yeah, man. You alright?
Apollo: Yeah... It's just that....This is literally the first time I've ever beaten anyone in an actual Mario Party game that aren't the CPUs.
Ema: (Starts Smirking) Did you kept getting into Last Place or something?
Apollo: ('Scoffs') No! I got in Last Place only one time.
Ema: (Raised An Eyebrow)
Apollo: ('Sigh') Okay, fine. Maybe I got it four to five times....But I mostly get Second!
Klavier: (Chuckles Once More) Well, either way, I, for one, am happy for victory, Herr Forehead.
Wocky: Yeah. Even if your Pop-Off Theme is kind of Trash.
Apollo: "Trash"? Dude, this is the Theme of Voltron!
Ema: A Nerdy choice of a song if you ask me. We can think of a better Pop-Off Song than that.
Apollo: (Crosses his Arm) Yeah? Well, whenever either of you three win a game of Mario Party, you can try picking one of your own.
Ema: (Gives Apollo a Competitive Smirk) You're on, Justice.
Klavier Gavin
Guilty Love (Klavier's Theme) Plays......
Klavier: (Playing his Guitar A Little More Victoriously)
Apollo: (Unamused) Okay. Who idea was it to let Klavier play his own theme song as his Pop-Off Song?
Wocky: Better question is who let this man play the guitar in the house?
Ema: C'mon, you babies. It ain't that bad.
Apollo: (Raised an Eyebrow Towards Ema) You know, I'm surprised you're actually taking a liking to this, Ema.
Ema: (Shrugged) Hey. When you're dating a Prosecutor/Rockstar 24/7, you tend find "some" appreciation from his work.
Klavier: (Smiles Brightly) Well, Well, Well, my beautiful losers! How are you liking the performance so far?
Apollo: (Rolled His Eyes) It's Half Decent....
Wocky: (Annoyed) That shit been playing everywhere I go! It's already starting to get old, Gavin!!
Klavier: (Chuckles Lightly) Oof. What a tough crowd, indeed.
Ema: Eh don't worry about them, Fop. (Smiles Very Lightly) You're.... doing great so far.
Klavier: (Smiles Softly as he Gently Holds Ema's Hand) I humbly thank you for your undying support, Fräulein Skyes~ (Kiss the top of Ema's Hand)
Ema: (Blushes Heavily While Turning Her Hand and Herself Away from her Boyfriend) J-J-Just Finish your Pop-Off already, you stupid Fop!....
Klavier: (Chuckles Lightly at How Adorable His Girlfriend is Being Right Now) As you wish, my dear~ (Continues Rocking Out to his Theme Song)
Ema Skyes
"All I Do Is Win!" By DJ. Khalid Plays.....
Ema: (Relaxingly and Triumphantly Bop Her Head to Her Pop-Off Theme)
T-Pain: All I Do Is Win Win Win No Matter What! Got Money on My......
Apollo: (Rolled his Eyes, Unamused) You know, this might be the most inaccurate song about you I've ever heard. You only won one game of-
Ema: (Have One Finger Towards Apollo) Shhhhhhhhhhhh......
Apollo: ('Sighs Heavily') .....Mario Party.....
Ema: Apollo.
Apollo: What?
Ema: Don't take offense or anything, but....You guys lost. (Gives Apollo a Smug Smirk on Her Face) And Losers don't complain.
Wocky: (Shrugged) She has a point, man. Won't do any good if we complain.
Apollo: ('Sighs in Defeat') Fiiiiine....
Klavier: (Chuckles Lightly) Oh, don't be like that, Herr Forehead. Ema won the game fair and square. The least we can do is let her enjoy her little victory for now.
Ema: .......Hey, Fop.
Klavier: Hm?
Ema: (Got up From her Chair and Made her way to Klavier) There's something I need to tell you.
Klavier: Oh really? Well, what ever could it be Fra-
Before he can even finish his own sentence, Klavier gets pulled into a Quick Passionate Kiss from his Girlfriend, Ema Skye's, before she starts pulling away.
Ema: (Took a Deep Breath) There....Now we're even.
Klavier: (Chuckles Once More) Honestly....You never seize to amaze me, my dear.
Ema: (Look Away from Klavier While Blushing) Whatever......
Wocky Kitaki
Apache by the Sugarhill Gang Plays.....
Apollo: Are we seriously doing this right now?
Wocky: (Got into Position to Dance for his Pop-Off Song with Everyone Unhappily Joining in) We are going to dance into the entire song! My Pop-Off, My Rules!
And just like that, once they start shaking their hips six times, the gang starts dancing around to the music. (Except for Ema, who starts doing a pretty lazy Robot Dance)
Wocky: Happier! I wanna see you dance with a smile on all of your faces!! Smiles!!
Klavier: You know, I'm not sure if the Sugarhill Gang really sang that song-
Wocky: Are you still talking, Gavin?!
Klavier: Well I mean-
Wocky: You lost, remember? Losers don't complain! All they do is dance!!
Klavier: (Chuckles Lightly While Rolling His Eyes) Okay, Herr Kitaki.
Apollo: (Whispers to Ema) You know, I have no idea Wocky would be that interested in dancing.
Ema: (Whispers Back to Apollo) I'm surprised he even knows how to dance at all...
Wocky: Less Talking, More Dancing, 'Losas!!!
???????
Rainbow by Songbird Plays......
Trucy: (Cheers Triumphantly From Her Chair) WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Trucy Wright. is. The CHAMPION!!!! Woohoo! YEAH!!!
Wocky: Damn.... She's even louder than you are, Justice.
Apollo: ('Sigh') She is my sister after all...
Ema: Can't believe your own sister beats us in Mario Party....
Klavier: (Smiles Sheepishly) Come now, you guys. Fräulein Wright won fair and square. Might as well let her have her moment.
Ema: (Glares Lightly at Klavier) You're only saying that because you didn't have to play.
Klavier: (Chuckles Lightly) I mean.... You're not entirely wrong on.
Trucy: 'Thena!
Athena: (Pops Up from the Kitchen) What's up?
Trucy: I Won!
Athena: ('GASPS') (Made her way to Trucy) Oh my God... Seriously?!
Trucy: (Excitedly Nodding Her Head) I'm the SUPERSTAR!!!
Athena: Holy Crap, Trucy!! (Gives Trucy a Big Hug) Congratulations!!
Trucy: (Giggles Softly) Thank you!
*Door Opens*
Maya: Hey, kiddos.
Pearl: Ummm.... What's going on here?
Athena: (Turns to Maya and Pearl) You guys, our girl Trucy just won a game of Mario Party!!
Maya: ('GASPS') NO WAY!!!
Pearl: (Smiles Excitedly) Is this really true?!!
Trucy: It's the Truth, Pearly! I, Trucy Wright, has become the SUPERSTAR!!!
Maya and Pearl excitedly make their way towards the duo and join in on the triumphant Group Hug while Squealing in Pure Joy.
Ema: (Getting Irritated by the Ladies' Squeals) God, this is worst than trying to dance to Apache.....
Wocky: (Glares at Ema) Hey! That song is a legend! It's deserve the respect it earns!!
Apollo: (Facepalms while Sighing) This can't get any worse than this......
Trucy: Oh, Polllllly!~
Apollo: (Slowly Turn his Head up to a Smirking Trucy) Yes, Trucy? What's wrong?
Trucy: Oh nothing~ I was just wondering if you still remember our deal or not.
Ema/Wocky: Deal?
Klavier: What is she talking about, Here Forehead?
Apollo: Uhh.... Nothing! It's nothing. Really. I mean.... (Chuckles Awkwardly) I don't even know what she's talking about here, ya know?
Athena: (Raised an Eyebrow Towards Apollo with a Playful Smirk on her Face) Pollo~ Come on now~ Don't try worming your way out of this one, 'hon~
Apollo: (Starts Sweating Bullets) Uh you know? (Got up from his Seat) Maybe it's time for us to get some snacks don'tcha-
Ema: (Grabs Apollo's Arm with a Smirk on her Face) Hold on there, Justice. I wanna hear what they're talking about here.
Wocky: Yeah! Us too!
Klavier: (Simply Nodded in Agreement)
Maya: Welllllllllll, you see.... Yesterday, all of us here made a bet to see which one of these two kiddos would win in Mario Party.
Ema Really now? And what, pray tell, did you guys beat on?
Pearl: (Giggles Softly) It was simple really. For you see, if Polly were to lose the game, he would get........
Trucy: A nighttime of Snuggles and Cuddles with his Loving Family!!!
Athena: Us!!
*Silence*
Wocky: (Burst Out Laughing) Pfft HAHAHAHA!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Ema: (Snickering) Holy Shit, Apollo Justice. What the hell did you gotten yourself into?
Apollo: (Blushes Bright Red) I don't know, okay?! I-I mean....I didn't know Trucy would actually win the game!!!
Klavier: (Smiles Sheepishly at his Friendly Rival) Maybe. But you do realize that anything can happen in Mario Party, right?
Apollo: (Facepalms while Groaning Once More) Now you tell me.....
Maya: ('Sigh') Polly, I don't even know why you're starting to get embarrssed now.
Trucy: (Pouts at her Big Brother) Yeah! You love our Cuddle Time, remember?!
Pearl: (Rapidly Nodded her Head while Pouting at Apollo as Well)
Wocky/Ema: Pftt AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Klavier: (Chuckles Lightly) Herr Forehead! I had no idea you were a fan of Cuddles.
Apollo: Y-Yeah? Well....I like it, okay?! It's nice! I-It's Comforting and Relaxing! P-Plus, I get to do it with the people I love! So honestly, it's technically a win-win for me!!! S-So, Suck it!!
Trucy/Maya/Pearl: (Starts Giggling at How Adorable Apollo is Being Right Now)
Ema: (Smirks at Apollo) Spoken like a true Cuddler, Justice!
Wocky: (Snickering) Uh-Huh!
Apollo: (Groans Once More in Annoyance)
Athena: (Pulls Apollo into a Loving Hug) Ignore them, 'hon. There is absolutely nothing wrong with Cuddling with the ones you love, Pollo. (Gives Apollo a Loving Kiiss on a Cheek) I promise~
Apollo: ('Sigh') Yeah.... I know. Just.... Trying not to let it bother me too much, you know? (Smiles Softly towards Trucy) But in all seriousness though, Congratulations on winning, Truce.
Ema: (Nodded While Smiling) Yeah.
Wocky: (Smiles Brightly) Nice one!
Klavier: You did a wonderful job winning , Fräulein Wright.
Trucy: (Smiles Brightly) Thanks, you guys. NOW LET THE CUDDLING COMMENCE!!!
After Game Night was over with, The Everything's Wright Family begins to watch a movie while forming a Cuddle Pile with one another. And even though he lost a game of Mario Party earlier today, Apollo is still admittedly enjoying every moment of it with the people he knows and love.
@apollo-justice-for-all
@keyenuta
@cyber-wildcat
@26shann
@albion-93
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insphoeration · 6 years
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Her [Kim Namjoon]
Fandom: BTS ARMY 
Pairing: idol!Namjoon x fan!Reader 
Summary: Reader bumps into BTS while they are on tour in her hometown. And their faithful leader can’t stop thinking about her.
Warning: USING STAGE NAMES AT FIRST - until the character gets to know then. Cheesy and stupid because I’m now bangtan trash.
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It started when your cousin took the aux cord. She asked if she could play a song and you said yes, the two of you had similar music so you knew she would play something good. She looked over at you eagerly as the music flowed through the speakers. You smiled and bopped your head to the music when you heard the beat. 
“Who is this?” You asked, when you couldn’t make out the words. 
“BTS.” She exclaimed excitedly. You narrowed your eyebrows at her, you eyes only leaving the road for a second. “It’s k-pop!” 
Your eyes widened and your mouth dropped. “No way!” That song and the other songs of the group she played was nothing like what you thought k-pop was 
That night you went home and did some research. It took a while before you learned their names and their most popular songs. Your life became quiet after that- other than being consumed by videos of the boys being dorks. It helped when your mom was in the hospital and all you could do was sit next to her for hours while she slept. 
It kind of seemed like fate when your cousin texted you that BTS was coming to your town, you knew how much she liked them and offered to go with her. By this time you knew how big they were and that getting tickets would be impossible but of all places they were coming to your hometown, that laughing stalk of your state, so you picked up a couple of extra shifts at work to be able to afford the tickets. 
It took you a while to actually buy them, there were more things you could have used the money for but you knew you would need something to look forward to for the next couple of months.  
The day that felt like it would never come finally arrived, you knew the area where the venue was in fact, you have been there too many times to count. You didn’t need to camp out because you bought seated tickets but still arrived early. You stood in line talking to some of the other fans, feeling slightly embarrassed that you were older than most of them but your cousin took your mind off of things. 
The concert was better than you imagined, the crowd was insane, so enthusiastic. Some of the girls around you gave you looks when you didn’t know the lyrics to some of their songs but you and your cousin still had a good time. The concert ended pretty late and everyone went home but you were full of energy, the walk to your ‘spot’ was not far and the weather was beautiful. Buzzing, you walked to the tea shop, giggling about how good your biases looked. 
The two of you sat down, drank tea, played cards and scrolled through social media before you knew it, the shop owners were telling you they were closing early tonight. You got up, confused, this time of year the shop is open until 3 am. You apologized hastily, if you knew you were running out of time you would have been out of their hair a while ago. 
Because the shop was closing, you weren’t expecting someone to be on the other side of the door. You head was turned, saying goodbye to the owners when you bumped into someone, sending you stumbling back. A hand reached out for you but just missed, your cousin stepped forward to grab you, catching you at the last minute. 
“I am so sorry!” You exclaimed, the hand reaching out to help you up. 
“You’re the one on the floor and you’re saying sorry?” Your breath caught in your throat. You knew that voice. You looked up to see none other than your bias in the flesh. You cousin looked up, dropping you in shock but thankfully RM had his hand around yours, able to hold you up. 
“I- uh- Yeah. I mean I didn’t see you there. I wasn’t paying attention, I’m so sorry.” You blurted, making him chuckle. 
“Let me buy you a drink as an apology?” He asked. You nodded, turning to walk back into the shop, your cousin’s mouth was still open, her eyes nearly as wide. You walked to the table you were just sitting at, everyone squeezed around as best they could even though they could have just joined another table. “So whats good here?” RM asked. Your cousin looked at you and the both of you giggled grabbing a menu. You have brought countless new people here so you had explaining the menu down to a T. 
“Where are you from?” J-hope asked slowly, you smiled at his effort to converse. 
“Here.” You said simply. 
“Really? So that means we’re at the good spot right?” He asked, some of the other boys nodded, the rest smiled, not really understanding. 
“Best place in town.” You grinned. You wanted to give them kudos on the concert but wasn’t sure if that would make you sound creepy, but your cousin beat you to it. 
“Great concert!” She blurted. You looked at her with wide eyes but it was already out there so you just nodded. 
“You guys were great.” You added. 
“You come to concert?” Jungkook asked. 
“It was amazing.” You smiled. They thanked you and you asked them if they had the chance to explore the town. It may have been your states joke but it had some beautiful spots. RM explained that they drove around a bit yesterday but they’ve mostly been practicing and after they relaxed a bit they were going to bed and around again tomorrow during the day. They had another show in your city two days from now and they they were leaving. You offered to show them something but the boys looked wary. You promised that not only was it not far but you would not get them into trouble. RM, Jungkook, and J-hope agreed, the rest were tired and went back to the hotel which was only a short walk away from both the place you were now and the place you were going to show them. 
It was a university building, because it was for students, it was open 24 hours a day however some of the classrooms were locked and there were camera’s and guards everywhere. When you walked into the main lobby, the security guard stood to question you but smiled when he saw what was in your hand. You handed him the cup of his favorite tea and he grinned. 
“12?” He asked and you nodded. He sat back down and you made your way to the elevator. 
On the twelfth floor there was a wall made entirely of glass, and from there you could see the entire city, sparkling with lights. The guys wowed in awe, making you smiled, you’d hoped you would get that reaction. 
“Sometimes my friends and I come up here to talk, sometimes we just sit and watch the city.” You smiled, looking out smiling to yourself when you saw familiar buildings. 
Jungkook nudged his hyung, motioning his head to their leader. J-hope could only see his back but through the reflection of the glass he could see his leader smiling at you. 
They took a few photo’s then Jungkook’s phone pinged and he sighed, showing it to his brothers. RM ran a hand through his hair frustratedly. 
“What’s wrong?” You asked softly. 
“The others got recognized and now there’s a mob at the front of the hotel.” He groaned. You knew BTS loved their fans, they wouldn’t have given you a second look otherwise but you also knew how exhausted they were. 
“No biggie, I know a shortcut.” You smiled. RM’s head snapped in your direction. 
“Seriously?” 
“Of course! All these old buildings are connected. We can just take the tunnels.” 
“Tunnels?” J-hope stepped forward. He didn’t know a lot of English but he knew tunnels were sketchy. 
“It’s not that bad! C’mon.” You lead them back to the elevator. From the basement, it was a ten minute walk past mostly empty hallways to the basement of the hotel. 
“This place is crazy!” RM said, walking beside you. 
“It’s not so bad once you figure everything out.” You shrugged and smiled for what felt like the hundredth time that night. 
“Thanks for doing this- going through all this trouble, you didn’t have to...” 
“Y/N.” 
“Y/N.” He repeated, smiling. “Namjoon.” He said, you nodded already knowing. 
The doors opened to parking 2 and you and your cousin got out, you were on such a high you forgot to thank them. 
The doors were about to close when Namjoon stuck his hand between them, nearly getting his had crushed. Multiple gasps and exclamations could be heard as the door stopped then opened again. 
“Are you busy tomorrow?” Namjoon asked. Your jaw dropped and so did the others. J-hope and Jungkook had no idea why their leader just nearly injured himself or lept out of the elevator. “It’s just that we might need a tour guide and after tonight I don’t know if anyone is going to be able to top you.” He said shyly. 
“Wouldn’t your staff had taken care of that a long time ago?” You asked. He shrugged. You took a pen out of your pocket and wrote your number on the back of his hand. 
“Figure it out then give me a call?” You giggled pushing him back into the elevator.
Namjoon couldn’t stop smiling, he hasn’t felt this way for a long time. He put your number into his phone instantly. Jungkook and Hoseok told the others about what happened as soon as they got to their floor. Namjoon was almost ready for bed when the other members invaded his room. 
“Whats wrong?” He asked, a toothbrush hanging out of his mouth. But they all just stood and stared at him. He narrowed his eyes at his brothers. 
“Are you going to call her?” Jin asked. Namjoon almost choked on toothpaste. He shook his head, ducking into the washroom to rinse his mouth, coming back out to see the other six waiting for him. 
“She seemed nice.” V said. 
“You obviously like her.” Yoongi added. Namjoon opened his mouth but Yoongi was not done. “If you didn’t, you wouldn’t be smiling so much.” 
Namjoon let his smile drop, not even noticing that he was smiling. 
“There’s no point.” He sighed. “It would never work.”
“But you want it to work?” Jimin asked, “that means you like her enough to want something.” 
“Enough!” Namjoon exclaimed. “We’re all tired and we have a big day ahead of us tomorrow.” He shooed them out of his room, he was tired but he couldn’t sleep. He stared at your phone number for who knows how long, starting a text then deleting it then starting one again. 
You obviously like her. 
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deadcactuswalking · 4 years
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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 14/02/2020
This’ll either be a long episode, a very confusing one, or both. We have nine new arrivals, which might actually be our most ever, although it’s probably tied with one from last year unless we had something ridiculous like twelve new arrivals. Let’s just get this over with.
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Top 10
First of all, celebrating its second week at #1, we have “Blinding Lights” by the Weeknd stable since last week at the top spot. I love this song, so I’m definitely glad to see it here.
Speaking of songs I love, “The Box” by Roddy Ricch isn’t moving either at number-two.
In fact, much like most of our busy weeks, the top 10 doesn’t necessarily reflect that, as with some exceptions, there’s nothing of note to speak of here. “Before You Go” by Lewis Capaldi is stable at number-three.
The number-four spot has also stabilised; “Don’t Start Now” by Dua Lipa is there, and doesn’t seem to have any competition.
Neither does “Godzilla” by Eminem featuring the late Juice WRLD, unfortunately, at number-five.
Up two spots to number-six for whatever reason is “Life is Good” by Drake, then Future – this might rebound even higher next week due to a DaBaby remix.
“Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi is down a spot to number-seven, but it’ll be back in the top five once the BRITs have their impact. Delightful.
Our big story in the top 10 is the 13-space boost for “Roses” up to number-eight, meaning it’s Saint Jhn’s first ever top 10 single in the UK, and, yeah, sure, we’ll give Imanbek credit for that too, since his unauthorised house remix really blew it up all over Europe. Hence, I’m pretty sure this is the first Kazakh lead artist on a UK Top 10 single, and that’s pretty epic.
Billie Eilish’s “everything i wanted” is down two spots to number-nine.
And finally, to round off our top 10, is the non-mover, “Adore You” by Harry Styles.
Climbers
To my surprise, we do actually have a few notable climbers, and a lot more than I expected at that. First, there’s “You should be sad” by Halsey up five spaces to #12, making a pretty unexpected play for the top 10. There’s also “Lonely” by Joel Corry up 14 spaces to #16 off of the debut, and “Lose You to Love Me” by Selena Gomez inexplicably moving up six spots to #21. Maybe in the wake of a Justin Bieber album, there’s some stan revenge streaming? It’s a stretch but that’s honestly my only explanation other than it making another, more organic chart run. I do have a reason for Jonas Brothers and the nine-spot boost for “What a Man Gotta Do”: the second video as well as the One Show performance, which is still something millions of people watch here in the UK. “Better Off Without You” by Becky Hill and Shift K3y is up 12 to #24 off of the debut and finally, “Say So” by Doja Cat is up 10 spots to #25 also off of the debut (Not complaining about that one).
Fallers
There were some pretty massive fallers this week but also not actually that many that were notable, and definitely ones that demonstrate a transition period between Winter 2019/2020 and Spring 2020, but these are also mostly hip-hop and rap, hence can be explained by streaming cuts, an arbitrary UK chart rule that affects nearly exclusively one genre for the most part. That’s not the case for all of them though; “Wake Up Call” by KSI featuring Trippie Redd is down 17 spaces to #28 because it’s a song by a YouTuber, and hence usually a bit crap. The rule did affect, however, “ROXANNE” by Arizona Zervas, down 24 spaces to #33, and “Memories” by Maroon 5, an exception to the rule seemingly, down 23 spots to #39.
Dropouts & Returning Entries
There were a hell of a lot of dropouts and actually two returning entries, for once. All of these dropouts don’t seem like they’re going to gain much traction after this week, and if they do, it’ll probably be some kind of fluke or special event that gets them back up there. I can see about three or four of these returning to the dregs of the top 40, but otherwise this seems to be the end of the line for most of these. “Bruises” by Lewis Capaldi is out from #15, “Pump it Up” by DJ Endor is out from #23, “Lose Control” by MEDUZA, Goodboys and Becky Hill is out from #25, “This is Real” by Jax Jones featuring Ella Henderson is out from #26, “Ride It” by Regard featuring Jay Sean ends its second run out from #29, “Gangsta” by Darkoo and One Acen is out from #32, “Don’t Rush” by Young T & Bugsey with Headie One is out from #34, “Ladbroke Grove” by AJ Tracey is out for what must be the fourth time from #37, “Those Kinda Nights” by Eminem featuring Ed Sheeran is thankfully out from #38, “Vossi Bop” by Stormzy is temporarily out from #39 but the BRITs will probably pick this one up and boost its numbers, and finally, “Big Conspiracy” by J Hus featuring iceé tgm is out from #40. The other two J Hus songs are somehow still in the top 40.
The two returning entries are, firstly, “Hold Me While You Wait” by Lewis Capaldi returning at #30, seemingly in a trade with “Bruises”, because, I guess two Capaldi songs in the top 10 isn’t enough. The second is “Pee Pee” by M Huncho at #40, and I just love how stupid that song is. It’s actually a pretty fun and arguably good song, but I also have so many questions about it, like why the album it’s from is called Huncholini the 1st. I’m glad to see it back here though. Anyway, before we get to the new arrivals, here are some songs below the top 40 that I could see getting here in a couple weeks, if that. Not all of them are good, not all of them are bad. We have “All I Want” by Olivia Rodrigo at #72, “No Judgement” at Niall Horan at #70, “Yikes” by Nicki Minaj at #69, “No Shame” by 5 Seconds of Summer at #68, “What if I Told You that I Love You” by Ali Gatie at #63, “Charades” by Headie One and Fred Again at #57, “Stop this Flame” by Celeste at #56, “Staqdo” by MoStack at #54, “Mya Mills” by Lil Pino at #50, “Run” by Joji at #46, “High Fashion” by Roddy Ricch and Mustard at #45, and finally, “Ourself” by NSG at #43. Now, for our new arrivals.
NEW ARRIVALS
#38 – “Ballin’” – Mustard and Roddy Ricch
Produced by Mustard, Justus West and Gylttrip
Okay, so this is a song I’ve been predicting would breach the top 40 for ages, mostly because it’s already been a massive hit in 2019 for the US, and hence is on my list of the best hit songs of 2019, which will probably be the last of one of those lists that I actually do. It’s #14, so it’s not that high, but I feel like I should talk more in-depth there since the list’ll be out as soon as possible, probably this month. It’s Mustard’s first UK Top 40 hit as a lead artist (Congratulations) and Roddy Ricch’s second – I love this song, we’ll talk about it more another day, that’s all.
#37 – “Suicidal” – YNW Melly
Produced by Z3n
Okay, so let me explain: Yes, YNW Melly, real name Jamell Demons (Fitting name by the way), is still in prison facing murder charges. This is the third album he’s released behind bars, obviously the others were released while he was incarcerated for less serious offenses, but it’s not exactly a new concept and hey, the label aren’t milking his death, at least, although they are milking the murder of two other people, so I guess that point’s out the window. It’s not impossible to make an album from prison but they’re probably just taking snippets of his SoundCloud stuff or unreleased demos and re-releasing it as new content. This is his second UK Top 40 hit after “Murder on My Mind” – if you go by just his song titles, this man is guilty as all hell – and well, it was never going to be any good, was it? The dull piano-lead trap beat isn’t emotive at all, and with the disruptive producer tags and clipping bass, as well as the generic emo guitar, it just feels emotionless, which is awful for a song called “Suicidal”, and YNW Melly is actually giving it all trying to replicate a typical emo-pop song with his voice that I actually love hearing most of the time, especially when it’s drowned in Auto-Tune like this; the vocal track here, despite oddly mixed, would sound great in isolation. Sadly, this beat is so boring, and he goes off topic so many times, with his structure-less flow and monotonous rambling about how he’s got his bag now and everyone’s wishing bad on him now (Probably because he’s facing murder charges)... yeah, this just does nothing for me, and it’s clearly an immature attempt at making a deep, powerful break-up song, even with some of the most pathetic inflections I’ve heard from the man in that “I’m drinkin’ Hennessey” bridge, as well as his heartbreak ending up being as deep as “I swear to God, I swear to God, you stupid bitch”. Yeah, no, this is not great at all, and way too long, by the way.
#36 – “Birthday” – Anne-Marie
Produced by Oak
So, if you forgot who Anne-Marie was, first of all I don’t blame you because so did I, but second of all, she’s a pop songstress who often hops on dancehall or house beats with a voice and delivery that treads the line between indie-girl mumble mouth and a fake Caribbean accent. This is the lead single from her second album, that actually debuted dangerously low—seriously, this is looking like it’s prepared for a sophomore slump ala Camila Cabello’s Romance late last year, although admittedly Anne-Marie’s chart presence, whilst seemingly omnipresent in 2018 and early 2019, has dwindled considerably. This is her tenth UK Top 40 hit, and well, I don’t exactly know what to expect but I’m guessing some fluffy, vaguely tropical dance-pop tune, but it could be a ballad for all I know. It doesn’t look like I’m too far off, but this one is particularly obnoxious, with a dated, beeping synth tone acting as the main melody, an aggravatingly static hi-hat pattern, a messy and out-of-place drum beat that sounds straight out of a shit Flume rip-off, some of Anne-Marie’s most obnoxious Auto-Tuned vocal inflections (And some of her most Kehlani-like, may I add), and vocal mixing that is questionably lower than the drums in the pre-chorus, even though they’re clearly not backing vocals. The chorus is hilariously trite, saying, “Goddamn, it’s my birthday”, and that people should give her money because it’s her birthday. Basically, it’s about a spoiled teenager on her 16th birthday being all rebellious and edgy to spite their parents but without any actual emotion or passion, and instead some pathetic vocal runs and disgusting, cluttered instrumentation... actually, that would describe a teenage birthday party pretty well. The little chuckle at the end in place of an outro is also really cringe worthy. What an awful song – it’s been a while since we’ve had a hit here that seems fundamentally broken, but this gets pretty close.
#34 – “Know Your Worth” – Khalid and Disclosure
Produced by Disclosure
R&B singer Khalid and EDM group Disclosure, two acts I happen to be very fond of whenever they appear on this show, have collaborated for the second time since 2019’s “Talk”, a song which I love but won’t be making an appearance on my best list for that year for one simple reason that’ll seem obvious once you read that list. This collaboration doesn’t seem to be for an album, though, and is instead an advert for Levi’s jeans. Nice. It’s Khalid’s thirteenth and Disclosure’s sixth (ironically excluding “Talk” as they weren’t properly credited as lead artist) UK Top 40 hit, and it sure is a Disclosure song, with their more modern EDM touches they’ve been picking up recently in productions like the aforementioned “Talk” and Mac Miller’s “Blue World”, but with some really sweet steel pans, the same stilted groove they’re known for, a quirky collection of beeping synths and a familiar yelling vocal sample that I can’t find the original source for anywhere. Khalid rides on the instrumental pretty nicely and smoothly but this really isn’t anything special, with the lyrics mostly being some kind of general motivation or self-empowerment, mostly directed towards a girl whose significant other doesn’t exactly treat her like she is worth, apparently to Khalid. I think Shawn Mendes is rubbing off on you, mate.
#32 – “London” – M24 featuring Tion Wayne
Produced by ETS
Hey, Tion Wayne! I like this dude a lot, and I was thinking about him a couple days ago, thinking that he’d had his time up on the charts, but he seems to be back with M24, another British rapper, for this new single. Tion Wayne is one of the main reasons “Options” by NSG is one of my most-listened songs of last year, and has since delivered excellent verses on “Bally” with the equally charismatic Swarmz and tried to lighten up the amazingly dull “Keisha & Becky” by Russ splash, who has since changed his name because of course he has. It’s safe to say he’s one of my favourite of the recent crop of London rappers, simply because of how fun his cadences can be. I was surprised when I saw him on a sharp black-and-white cover art with a song about London, which I assumed would be about the struggles of gang violence and poverty that Tion Wayne has since risen above, but instead, for his fourth UK Top 40 hit and M24’s first ever, we have a chorus that goes, “That gyal wan’ shock, one eye on her arse like, “Holy f***”, look at the arch, you know I buss, back up the arse like uh-uh”. That’s actually about what I expected from Tion Wayne to be honest. Looking back on all those songs that I mentioned, especially “Bally”, it has interesting, eccentric, exciting and energetic cadences, as well as some upbeat production that is sourly missing from people like Aitch and DigDat. That’s why while I was slightly disappointed by the more minimalist, dull, colourless drill production, which honestly actually kind of bangs, I was welcomed by Tion Wayne’s hilarious hook, especially the “UH UH” ad-lib, and his injections of humour into the verses, which M24 tries as well. Both M24’s more aggressive stuttering delivery and Tion Wayne’s more carefree flow work for this beat (which is unfitting for a song that’s supposed to be about attractive women by the way; this is in no way sexy), with Tion Wayne’s first verse seemingly carrying the theme of “beef”, and he likes a fight in prison because it’s “beef in a cell”... “like Beyoncé”? Huh? He kind of gets away with it though, as the next line is even funnier; his gun is like his roll-on deodorant because it doesn’t leave shells. He shouts out his designer-brand boxers then says that he will fight a man for his phone charger. You get why I like this dude, right? He’s kind of absurd. M24 and Tion Wayne trade bars on the second verse, with M24 even lightening up to say that his sex is so good that his groupies try to invite their mother. Lovely. They also share some clever worldplay about “ye” (drugs) and Kanye, both comparing themselves to Kim Kardashian in the process. All this is without overstaying its welcome, by the way, it’s less than three minutes. Wayne then, for a final few bars, adopts the “A$AP Forever” flow to shout out basically every woman in England, as well as saying this:
I f*** your girl from the back / I put my block on the map
These two events (hopefully) have no relation to each other, like at all. Never change, Tion Wayne.
#31 – “Destined for Greatness” – Tobi & Manny featuring Janelle
Produced by Krunchie and Zdot
I knew this was going to be a tricky one once I realised that I know more about the producers than I do about any of the three primary vocalists here. Krunchie and Zdot are responsible for much of Bugzy Malone’s discography, especially the older stuff. Anyway, this is the first UK Top 40 hit for Tobi & Manny, a duo much like Young T & Bugsey or Krept and Konan made of two members or affiliates of the Sidemen, namely: Tobi and Manny, two brothers that joined KSI’s group of YouTubers, rappers, entertainers, FIFA players, what have you. They teamed up with their sister Janelle, who actually contributes very little to the song, no more than a short intro and backing vocals, for a kid-friendly motivational anthem – on a dark, menacing beat. Of course. Yeah, this is pathetic. Both Tobi and Manny have no interesting bars, and whilst it is mostly a story-telling song, there isn’t any passion in their voices about their come-up, so why should I care? Janelle doesn’t exist, and if she does, she’s annoying, joining in on the bland hook for a somewhat colourful addition to the shitty non-entities of Tobi and Manny, both of whom are just phoning it in, but I feel like this is them trying to be their best, to be honest. This is just corny, and aggravatingly so, with a boring beat to boot. I have no idea how this debuted this high, when it is this painfully amateur. “We’re controlling the game like Nintendo Wii”? Give me a break. Oh, and I listened to Tobi’s only other official single as part of the Sidemen on “The Gift”, and somehow he had the best verse.
#29 – “React” – The Pussycat Dolls
Produced by Will Simms, Johan Gustafson and Ivares
The Pussycat Dolls were a girl group formed in the 2000s, who were reasonably  big worldwide and massive here in the UK. They weren’t made by a British talent show, but they were similarly generic and basically just the sexier alternative to the more teeny-bopper groups, and hence I guess were made more for boys than they were for girls, in that respect, but even for today, despite being produced and directed by men for men and presented consistently in an awfully objectifying manner, they have kept that “girl power” schtick. You may know them for “Don’t Cha”, “Buttons”, “Beep”, “I Hate This Part”, whatever, they’re all garbage. After the group split only lead singer Nicole Sherzinger retained relevance and officially made the only good song tangentially related to the Dolls, with her (originally uncredited) feature on “Club Can’t Handle Me” by Flo Rida and David Guetta. I mean, it’s a low bar that you’d think they’d be able to ascend, but I can’t think of a single song from the Dolls that is better. Anyway, they’re all in their 40s now, and they’ve reunited for their eleventh UK Top 40 hit (and their first since 2010’s “Hush Hush, Hush Hush” peaked at #17), with massive comeback, television debut, high-budget music video and... a chart debut at #29. Yikes. Well, the Dolls were always dancers rather than singers, so people won’t purchase the single in the streaming era where you can choose what to listen to and you’re not having songs pushed down your throat by radio stations incessant label promotion (Well, at least not most of the time, Drake). I think the only reason the song is even in the top 40 at all is that the UK Singles Chart decided three years ago that YouTube streams counted for the chart. Listen, the song is manufactured plastic dance-pop that’s worth no-one’s time, with even the most distinct voice in the band, Scherzinger, sounding like a vocaloid. The chorus is a massive rip-off of the melody from the verses of Carly Rae Jepsen’s “I Really Like You”, by the way. Once I heard that, I couldn’t get it out of my head. Jepsen’s song is actually good, by the way.
#27 – “Power Over Me” – Dermot Kennedy
Produced by Koz
Remember “Outnumbered”? That was a pretty decent folk-trap hit, right? Well, Dermot Kennedy is back for his second UK Top 40 single, which was actually released far before his breakout hit but is getting the push now, “Power Over Me”, originally released in 2018. Now, it’s basically the same concept: Irish dude croons and belts over a guitar-lead pop song... but this isn’t a ballad, and instead has a real kick to it, figuratively and literally, but very little groove. The song isn’t bad at all, and I love the concept of a song of not him having the power in this relationship, but him finding himself subservient to this girl, who he paints as some kind of deity figure, and it’s convincing. God, I love how the drums sound in this song. The humming in the pre-chorus is just so sonically pleasing as well. The belting in the bridge and the mesh of guitar, on the other hand, isn’t really, but damn, the strings in the final chorus are genuinely gorgeous, and it’s catchy as hell, so for a good folk-rock love song, yeah, I can vouch for this one. There’s a MEDUZA house remix to this that hilariously misses the point of this song but sounds crazy good doing it, and might be a bit better than the original, if just for the blend of 80s post-disco and 16-bit chiptune bass in the drop. Either way, this is a good song, and reminds me kind of 2000s alt-rock, as did “Outnumbered”, to be honest. Maybe I should check out that debut self-titled album.
#14 – “Intentions” – Justin Bieber featuring Quavo
Produced by Poo Bear and the Audibles
This is the most 2016-sounding song that was released after 2017, and that’s just off the title alone. You guys want to add Chance the Rapper while you’re at it? God, what an anti-climactic end to our new arrivals. Justin Bieber and Quavo. I cannot imagine a blander, less interesting duo than Justin Bieber and Quavo. I think I’ve lived approximately five Quavo verses ever, the dude is so non-descript compared to the rest of the Migos, especially Offset, who, to be honest, I’ve become quite a fan of in recent months. It’s Bieber’s 46th UK Top 40 hit or something to that effect, and Quavo’s seventh but who cares, honestly? Who is listening to Bieber out of passion for his music or voice or whatever? Only his biggest, most loyal fans. The general public who casually listen to Bieber are listening more out of morbid curiosity than anything else, and for someone who seemed like the biggest star in the world at some point, that’s just depressing. Yeah, I have nothing else to say, and I’ll continue to ignore actually reviewing this dude’s songs, even once the album bomb comes next week, if it even does. I think the “(feat. Lil Dicky)” song might be even more dreadfully embarrassing than the “(feat. Quavo)”, actually.
Conclusion
All things considered, this was a below-average week but I had a lot of fun reviewing these songs, so at least most of them were interestingly bad or had intriguing stories behind them. Even if I didn’t review it, the Best of the Week is still going to “Ballin’” by Mustard and Roddy Ricch, with Honourable Mention probably being a toss-up between “London” by M24 featuring Tion Wayne, and “Power Over Me” by Dermot Kennedy. The Worst of the Week is undoubtedly “Birthday” by Anne-Marie, with “Destined for Greatness” by whoever that was by picking up the Dishonourable Mention. This could be one of two or three big weeks on the horizon, so watch out for that and follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank for my real-time reactions to said weeks, and more pop music ramblings. Thank you for reading!
REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020
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