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#subjectively as in........ just the vibes and feelings i get. lol when you get to know someone‚ there's a bunch of different impressions
fourteenthz · 6 months
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Every time I open my shakarian playlist I get more ill but also I need.... need more old sad songs... i need to collect them all.... where are they
#yeah my playlist is filled with Out of touch + Two of us + Mayonata no door + and stuff that sounds like that (night we met for exemp)#and i have to both have this feeling and make it made sense with shakarian which is hard bc they are not toxic just difficult. hard times.#which is kinda good bc old songs normally have that feel but like 90% of mitsik songs feel off for me in that sense#BUT I NEED THEM FOR THE VIBE... GOD.... can u tell I take playlists seriously? and they aren't even public???#i saw that when I have like 3 mitski songs there but I try. also I REALLY don't line Lana but man if summertime sadness isn't about them.#“i think ill love you forever” part is GENUINELY SO THEM and no one else. i swear.#like 10% of the songs on that playlist are from artists i like and usually listen to but that mostly bc im not a moody sad old songs kinda#of girl and i just caN NOT choose anything else for shakarian. like i swear I can picture shepard showing that kind of songs for garrus#and garrus listening to most of these on thr 2 years gap even before they get together..... bc he heard her listening once#in the normandy and it stuck with him bc... u know... reminds him of her... im gonna throw up#“smoking gun's hot to thr touch” from out of touch reminds him of their meeting like the night we met entire song#but it doesnt gets him more than “none of you” from the chorus. and by the time me3 comes they are sooo Local Natives coded#When am I gonna loose you + I saw you close your eyes ESPECIALLY#its also insane how I can go into akiangel playlists and get songs from there tbh... i never watches csm and NEVER WILL bc really not my#thing. but man akiangel stans know how to do playlist and they are the exactly same feeling i get with shakarian#sorry for the akiangel playlist makers who I have liked the playlist and listened to it on repeat. i was thinking abt shakarian while doing#sorry for the SUDDEN txt post about my spotify playlist.... i spent the morning doing university work and I accidentally#changed from my xiv playlist to the shakarian one and it went downhill from there........ anyway miss my babies..... enough rambling now#ALSO theres this thing were skip The night we met bc its my go to ardbert song LOL but THAT'S LIKE... ANOTHER SUBJECT ANYWAY#kelly says#dl#i forgot to mention For the first time by mac de marco which i like... ultimate shakrian song with Out of touch..... ANYWAY ANYWYAYA
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allylikethecat · 7 months
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i just got in to reading your fics and omg can i just say (sometimes) hurt so good!! i’d love to see how you’d interpret fictional george comforting fictional matty once matty recovers more and they talk things through and have a productive conversation, no pressure though! keep up the good work 😁😁
Thank you so much for reading! I'm so happy to hear that you have enjoyed my fics! (Sometimes) in particular is my precious baby, it was hard to write, but I was (and still am) extremely happy with and proud of the finished product. I have toyed around with the idea of writing either a sequel or a companion fic and exploring what a physical and mental recovery would look like. I have even gone as far as outlining it and adding a few paragraphs here and there to the notes app on my phone (where all my fics start their lives lol) however at this time finishing it is not on the top of my metaphorical "to write" list. I'm not saying I'll never write a sequel or companion to it, just that if I do it's not going to be anytime soon. I'm so glad that you enjoyed it though, especially enough to reach out about a companion. 😊 As I said, it is a piece I am proud of, and I am happy to see that it resonates with others and that they are enjoying it despite the heavy subject matter. Thank you so much for reading and I hope you have a wonderful day and continue to enjoy my other works! I will (hopefully) have the next chapter of the A&E fic up tomorrow!
❤️Ally
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portgasdwrld · 5 months
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★ Hickeys
ೃ⁀➷do they suck (lol) at hickeys, giver or receiver?, how? all answered down below by your beloved Tomie✨
ೃ⁀➷Psss this is a head-canon, take it lightly~
ೃ⁀➷ Suggestive, implied f!reader, NSFW language
ೃ⁀➷ monster trio + Law+ Ace
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: ̗̀➛ Luffy
He’s the type to receive them more than to give
When he realizes he has hickeys, he’s just gonna wonder how it’s even possible and if smth hit his neck during a fight💀
Probably gonna bug Chopper about it, until he brushes him off mentioning it’s nothing
Then when you’re making out and you linger on his neck, it clicks into his mind. He yells a « ooohh, It was you! » after realizing that, it surprises you and you almost bit his skin-
He’s down to try it when you explain that you want them on you too
« You want me to suck your skin a little until it bruises? A bit like when you bruise after a fight? »
« Ugh… not the same but you got the spirit? »
He’s dense, but he tried and he didn’t do as bad as you thought
: ̗̀➛ Law
LMAO?? Wouldn’t he be the type to lowkey hit you with a scientific facts that hickeys can kill you if done wrong🤓😭
Ik he would. Im so sorry😮‍💨
On another note, tbh I feel like he’s just sooo into it, when his mind is fogged by lust. He will be making out with you and damn, he’s now leaving wet kisses all over your neck. That itself, just awaken some type of possessive strike and you’re left with hickeys a bit everywhere.
Will quietly eye them when y’all are cuddling after sex. He won’t comment on it beside if you point them out.
“They look great.”
It would be the most reaction you will get out of him. He’s so hot though- intrusive thoughts but they are real 😔
He doesn’t mind at all if you leave some on him fr. Like if it’s done within the right vibe and y’all are just kicking it and you’re riding him or y’all in lotus position, he might even groan and moan a little louder and curse under his breath.
: ̗̀➛ Sanji
Oh his mouth is ALLL OVERR your body. He’s kissing, praising, leaving hickeys all over your body. On you chest, between your thighs, on you collarbone.
He’s almost in a trance while he loves your body and mark it. He’s gotta to enjoy his pretty lover and you bet he’s gonna make it known that you are his and he’s the lucky man who has you!!
He’s so sweet about it, with sweet compliments, but it’s a bit messy too. Wet patches, mumbles from his muffled lips.
He’s SOOOOO down if you wanna do it on him. He gets very excited and can’t stop smiling and touching your body.
“Yes of course I’m down! Wanna try it rn? We got time yk..”
Best boy 🤧
ೃ⁀➷ Zoro
His neck always has some hickeys from you. He thought he hated it, but he quickly got over it and finds it hot now.
He doesn’t care too much if someone stare at them, but he will throw a curse out with a deadpan expression, if someone made a snarky comment.
He also has this possessive strike, so you bet you’re gonna have some type of bruises-hickeys on your body after y’all are done. Because he doesn’t go easy on you, he will be thrusting deep into you, while silencing you with his fingers deep in your mouth. Along with that, his mouth is nibbling on you neck and all your sensitive spots.
It’s an overstimulating mess.
He smirks satisfied when he sees you marked up, moaning his name and completely lost into his touch.
ೃ⁀➷ Ace
Oh, this man here has the biggest possessive strike out of all the men here.
I touched on the subject a little on my NSFW head canon, but he definitely love giving them. He whines when you do, because he’s apparently allergic to shirts and get slightly annoyed when each of his friends on the ship makes some jokes.
He loves that everyone knows you’re his. Because he gets to have one person for him, that actually feels love toward him and someone he can trust??! That’s the life prize!
Every time he fucks you, he makes sure that hickeys are created everywhere on your body.
He will shower you with attention and cocky comments as he sucks on to your skin.
It’s his specialty😮‍💨
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itgirl-111 · 6 months
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OFFENSIVELY ATTRACTIVE VAUNT
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Why do I have to be so offensively attractive? Everything about me from top to toe is perfection. You've never seen a face as pretty and flawless as mine. No cause why do I have to look this hot? I'm fr the hottest girl on the planet. Everything about me from top to toe is pure perfection, my individual features are perfect and flawless but when they come together they are so harmonious? Like everything just fits my face so fucking perfectly like it's meant to be there. Every inch of my face and body is gorgeous and flawless. I am a walking masterpiece, I'm a work of art. Everyone is obsessed with me the first time they see me, I am so drop dead gorgeous that people literally double take and gasp once they lay their eyes on me. I mean, I'm always the center of attention because why wouldn't I be? I high key give off real main character vibes, it's like I straight up walked out of an anime. It's near impossible for someone to look this humanely beautiful but I do because I'm just too damn stunning. I literally take everyone's breath away. I am so offensively attractive, people find it difficult to not look at me, I swear all eyes turn only to me because I'm literally the most beautiful ever. It's only once in a blue moon that you'd get a chance to see a person as attractive as I am, Im once in a lifetime afterall. I get complimented every single day, I hear everyone call me beautiful more than my own name. I am too painfully attractive, it's indescribable. I'm the typa girl who you see once and never forget. I literally got everyone feeling some type of way they never felt before. I am literally so utterly mesmerizing. I got everyone simping for me fr. I'd be literally breathing and everyone would be down bad for me, Literally down bad. I got universal sex appeal, meaning everyone regardless of sexuality is down bad for me . I am so sexy people genuinely cannot get over it and everyday I just get 100x trillion times hotter. I am just sooo damn fine like I've got too pretty of a face and even more powerful vibe. I believe in my supremacy fr. Sometimes it's just so hard to grasp the fact that a person as attractive as I, is living on the same planet as everyone else, everyone is damn lucky to be born in the same generation as I am. It's ridiculous how many simps I have, like damn I really got everyone down bad for me huh. I am the pinnacle of God tier beauty and charisma.
There's something about my vibe which is just so uniquely mine, like my vibe and energy is so one of a kind, everyone can feel my vibe even before I walk into the room. I give off an expensive, powerful, hot girl vibe who straight up walked out of an anime I swear lol. My energy is way too magnetic and irresistible, it speaks volumes. My presence is literally out of this world. The way I carry myself, the way I talk, the way I do things, the way I think, the way I look, my energy, my mannerisms, my habits, all of it is way too unique to be replicated. Everyone wanna study me like their favourite subject. It's impossible to mistake me for another one, I stand out and outshine literally everyone with my beauty, charisma, and interesting personality. The fact that it comes to me so naturally and effortlessly? Even better. I've got such amazing wit and humour, I'm so personable that people genuinely love to be around me even though I may seem intimidating at first. I always know how to spark interesting and amazing conversations, I know when to speak and be quiet, I got that perfect balance between loud and quiet confidence. My intelligence and the way I keep learning new things so easily? Even hotter!. I am an ICON. My energy is actually so magnetic, I have that little something, that is just so insanely attractive and captivating that it cannot be described in words, only felt. I truly believe in my own supremacy.
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n3tworksucks · 11 months
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Hey babe! Could you do like a NSFW alphabet headcanon thing for Carl Gallagher?
Ily🤍🤍
HIII BBY OFCC ILYT🤍🤍 (UPDATED!!)
word count;1430
warnings; nsfw n stuff sooo..... do what you want with that💀(an- i updated it because it wasn't too accurate and it was finally starting to bother me so i hope i made it a little more accurate😘)
A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)
he'd probably already have like a towel and water or something so when yall are done he could just quickly clean up then probably cuddle, or smoke and talk or both.
B = Body part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
I'd say he likes his upper body(like idk how to explain lmao) so his torso and arms and stuff because like he could do a lot with his arms and stuff ;)
and for you, probably your boobs or thighs because he likes leaving hickeys on them and he love going down on you, so I could definitely see him growing some extra love for your thighs, and it doesn't even have to be sexual too, he just loves every part of you.
C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically)
loves cumming inside, like if you're on the pill or hes using a condom, but if not, I feel like his pull out game if pretty strong, so hed like to cum on your lower stomach or back. and for you, he'd love it if you came anywhere lol, like him just knowing he made you cum just makes it better.
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
I feel like he'd wanna talk to his friends about his sex life not necessarily to brag. but also doesn't because he doesn't wanna risk any information getting out and you getting upset or something. but he'd probably tell a little to Ian if the subject came up somehow, but no details.
E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
oh god do I even have to answer💀? yes he is. I think we all know lol.. but mostly from like research from when he was younger, because he's not a virgin, but he definitely knows how and what to do in general, but the more you go at it, the more he learns your body and what it takes to pleasure you.
F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying.)
hes got a few for different places, but his mains are missionary but maybe with one ankle on his shoulder, or dogy, and if you have a favorite he'd most likely try it.
G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)
I mean, not all the time. I'd say 50/50. like there's times where its not a need to be serious but thats mostly the vibe, like it was an important date night or something. then other times like if you're both high or a little out of it then I'm sure there's a few giggles and jokes.
H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)
doesn't focus too much down there, but he'd probably trim when he feels like it or wants to look nice lmao.
I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 
yess, he loves the feeling of being close to you and to him it feels like it just builds the bond more, like even if its angry sex, he'd still kiss you lovingly and stuff like that.
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
sometimes yeah, like you're not able to see each other for a while, he'd probably jack off a few times, but doesn’t wanna do it often because he wants to wait for when you get to be with each other again ;)
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
he'd probably be into tying or holding your hands together, maybe a blind fold here and there if you're feeling frisky, and he'd probably be into smoking a joint or something too, like shotgunning.
L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)
mostly the bedroom, but, if you both were horny enough, probably a public bathroom, either in a stall or he'd lock the bathroom door and fuck on the counter. or anywhere, he doesn't care.
M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)
it doesn't take much, but he's better at controlling now, but what would get him going now is when you'd just physically love on him, like rub his thigh a little, kiss his neck, tell him you love him. if you do all those, he'd probably drag you away from everybody and go somewhere private. and idk why… but I can see this turning him on too, like when you're sweaty and stuff, I think if he thinks of another reason for you to be sweaty, that would probably get him going.
N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
definitely a no to anything that could hurt you and make you uncomfortable. no knifes, no major rough kinks and stuff, he'd hate to see you get hurt even a little with stuff like that, like wouldn't be too into harsh degradation, and doesn't wanna make you try unless its tears of pleasure.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
loooves going down on you all the time, like, he gets pleasure out of it too, he gets pussy drunk a lot of the time, but also loves a good blow. but he mainly gives first, knowing you give back eventually.
P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)
if its just normal casual sex, probably at a slight faster speed just because. not rough, but if its special or you both have some time on your hands, he'd go slow and sensual
Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)
not his favorite, but sometimes you both just need a moment, or just need to be quick with it. he's definitely good at quickies though if you need to be fast.
R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
he doesn't mind experimenting with things youd wanna try, or something he saw on the internet or something. and he doesn't care about where, like a public bathroom or in a car. in a way he likes the feeling, but doesn’t necessarily wanna get caught.
S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)
oh god, after military school he could probably go forever lmao, but obviouslyat some point there's rest. but I think he could go at least 3+. whether thats in the same time or same day, but i think after rounds, there'd be a break then he'd be back at it.
T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
now… I think at some point, you both would talk about it, like maybe he ask about it after he passed that one aisle at a cvs💀 but if you did end up using toys at some point, they'd mainly be for you, like a vibrator or something, but wouldn't wanna use them all the time, because he wants to be the only one that can make you feel good yknow?
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
he'd tease a little, mainly with his words, but even if he was unfair, he'd let you get back at him sometime to even it out.
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
if he's on top, he groans more, maybe let's one or two moans out, but its mainly heavy breathing. but if you were on top, he'd moan more, and act more subby. especially if he's he's pussy drunk, he'd moan while eating you out.
W = Wild Card ( a random headcanon)
so kinda back to like how to get him going, I feel like he's sensitive to certain touches and words/tones with you. like only if you're trying to get him going, and he can tell the difference between you being horny and you being affectionate, so if you touche him like that, you know he's sighing, closing his eyes, and leaning his head back
X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on under the belt)
I'd say.. about 6.5-7 inches. I'm not gonna go further💀
Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
pretty high, but can control his thoughts a little more, and by that I mean from 70,000 times a day to probably more times a day lmao
Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
he'd wait for you to fall asleep, and even when you're asleep, he'd still probably be awake not doing anything but laying with the love of his life.
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honeytonedhottie · 3 months
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becoming an academic weapon challenge⋆.ೃ࿔*:・✍🏽
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this is a fun little challenge i created that'll hopefully help u to build good academic habits that'll improve ur grades and help inspire you to pursue excellence in ur academic life.
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STEP ONE : ROMANTICIZE THE HECK OUT OF SCHOOL
when u learn to enjoy going to school, your going to be motivated to do well in school. because school is so IMPORTANT not only for ur education but also ur future. so take school seriously. and if u wanna become an academic weapon for the long term the best thing u can do is learn to make the best of, and enjoy it.
some ways to romanticize school :
create a school playlist that embodies the school vibes that u wanna have : i have lots of new jeans in my school playlist : i rly like the songs cookie, ditto and hurt for when im at school
ur appearance : if u go to a school where u dont have to wear uniforms, i strongly recommend getting dressed and getting ready meticulously bcuz when u look good, u feel good, and therefore u perform well. if u do wear uniform, wear accessories or hairstyles that make u feel and look pretty. i wear leg warmers with my school uniform and my signature is hair clips and barrettes.
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read at school : i always walk around with a book bcuz i like to read a lot but if reading isnt ur thing, listen to a podcast about something that interests u (i rly like true crime)
take pride in ur notes : invest in cute stationary! i swear, sometimes i dont feel like studying but since my stationary is super cute and pink i get motivated to study just by looking at it lol. invest in quality stationary that u love and make ur notes look pleasing to you, and also effective. effective + aesthetically pleasing.
doing homework/studying in the library : or at least changing the scenery and location that u do ur homework from time to time. do yk how boring it is to do work in the same place every single day? give urself a break from the places u see all the time and spend time studying or doing homework outside of ur home. in a cafe or in the library, inside or outside, just change the scenery a bit
start a video diary : i started a little video diary with my friends so that we can remember our school memories. i just think its rly cute and a great way to bond with ur friends, make memories, and romanticize school.
STEP TWO : CREATE A STUDY REGIMEN
every single day study (at least for a little bit) ofc this will vary depending on ur personal schedule but the goal is to do a little bit of studying everyday, and if that isnt possible, designating 3 days a week to a thorough studying session.
the way that i divide my time with a study session is 40 minutes of work time and 20 minutes of downtime. during the 40 minutes of work time u need to LOCK IN. lock in on whatever assignment needs to be complete or lock in on whatever material it is that ur studying. ofc this'll differ between all subjects but dont study all subjects in one night!! thats ambitious, but i find it'll just burn u out so stick to studying for 2-3 subjects max.
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STEP THREE : ADVOCATING FOR URSELF
this step is for everyone who feels a bit shy during school but u need to raise ur hand and ask questions!! dont focus on simply learning the material, the goal is to understand the material. understand it enough so that then u can explain it to someone else. thats how you can know when you've studied enough.
dont feel bad for asking a bunch of questions, its literally the teachers job to help you. so advocate for urself, if u need extra classes or a bit of extra help make sure that u get that for urself bcuz at the end of the day the only one responsible for ur grade is you.
STEP FOUR : THE RULES OF THE CHALLENGE
complete every assignment as if it was for a grade - dont half ass ur assignments, give every assignment 100%
study a little bit everyday or have thorough study sessions three times a week
romanticize school
ask one or more questions per teacher
FURTHER RESOURCES :
how to study consistently without burning out - by me
studying tips from a straight A student - @universalitgirlsblog2
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lovewithmary · 6 months
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(not) moving on — a max verstappen x stark!oc x charles leclerc series
★ fc: madison beer ☆ summary: evangeline "evie" stark is in love with her best friend, max verstappen, but he tries his best to keep her at arm's length. but what happens when she starts to get close to his fellow drivers in the paddock? ★ note: idek why i like creating stark ocs, but it’s fun. This is purely for my own entertainment but I don't know if I'll continue it. It depends if people actually want to see more of this. (realistically, I might continue it because I want to see it lol) btw how do people do the subtitles?? like I'm so curious I want to do those
schat = darling in dutch
next series masterlist
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liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, and 20,492,182 others
eviestark: life lately 💜
comments
user1: MY WIFE IS IN A RELATIONSHIP???
user2: she’s actually living the life rn
user3: SCHAT??? ANG???
user4: the random tony stark jumpscare in the photo dump LMAOOOO
user5: who is the guy with tony stark in the 7th photo?? ↳ user6: i’m pretty sure that’s peter parker, an employee of stark industries??? he’s started out as an intern in high school but he’s rumored to be the COO once evie becomes CEO of stark industries
user7: WHO TOOK THE 2ND PICTURE
user8: not the single guys from the f1 grid in her likes 😭😭
user9: THE WOMAN IN THE BACK IN THE 7TH PICTURE IM CRYING
user10: the first and second picture giving me 'boyfriend took these for me' vibes
user11: she looks so pretty and happy in the 4th picture <3
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"You're playing with fire by posting our text messages, Ang," Max said, his voice shushed as he walked around the paddock.
"It's fine, Maxie. They'll probably connect me to a random famous person who is Dutch and then it'll blow over in a week," Evie dismissed.
"It doesn't really help that the guys are in your likes constantly," Max grumbled, and he heard Evie laugh.
"Some of them are pretty cute, and I think some even tried messaging me but I never saw them until it was late," she responded.
"Who?"
"Aww, Maxie, are you jealous?" Evie cooed, her tone sweet yet mocking at the same time.
"No... I just never expected them to be brave enough to message you," Max said.
"If you must know, I think it was Charles and Lando who tried. There are probably others, but I haven't seen them,"
"Did you respond to any of them?"
"Of course not, I'm loyal to you and only you,"
"Schat..."
"I know, I know, you wouldn't touch me with a ten-foot pole like that," Max could practically hear her rolling her eyes.
"You know we're just best friends, right?"
"And I'm saying I'm loyal to you and only you as a best friend."
"Are you doing anything soon?" Max was quick to change the subject, feeling as if he didn't, awkwardness would settle in and he hates it whenever Evie doesn't speak since he's fully aware that he loves hearing her talk considering how passionate she gets about things.
"Stark Industries' Gala is happening and Pepper's making me get a date for the event,"
"Why's she making you?"
"Something along the lines of I have to be seen with someone that isn't MJ, Peter, Ned, and Shuri," Evie sighed.
Max laughed at her situation, knowing that while Evie knew a lot of people, there were only a few that she could trust completely. And luckily for him, he was one of them. He was probably the first, considering they've known each other since she was 6 and he was 8.
"Good luck trying to find someone,"
"It's not even trying to find someone I'm struggling with. It's trying to find someone that's decent enough to spend my night with,"
"Who were you going to ask?"
"Well, I was going to ask you, but since we're best friends I don't think me bringing you as my date to the SI event would be something best friends do,"
"I'll go," Max said, shrugging.
"Wait, seriously? Like you going means you actually have to dress up,"
"I know,"
"The dress code is black tie. That means you can't wear your Redbull uniform like you're a walking billboard,"
"Do I really wear it that much? I saw people that were shocked when I wore a white t-shirt,"
"You're a millionaire who wears the same thing every day. So basically, every millionaire man,"
"I'm going to wear Redbull head to toe to the Gala now that you said that,"
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shoddynomenclature · 3 months
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Honestly I’d beg for prompt 4. Is Tav the one in bed? What’s the vibe lol
BG3 x GN!Reader : “Stay in Bed, Please?”
I try to make the vibe a little bit different for all of them. There are certain characters who definitely sleep later and certain ones that are consistently up before sunrise.
Featuring Shadowheart, Lae’zel, Karlach, Minthara, and Jaheira
I’m really feeling this prompt right now, as it is impossible to get out of bed and go to work so early when the weather is so cold and the bed is so warm.
Shadowheart
You really do try and make as quiet an exit as possible. Shadowheart is a light sleeper.
Regardless, you don’t even make it off the mattress before you hear her precious little whine.
She turns over, sleepy eyes barely opened, looking into yours. Her hair is down and you almost giggle as it covers large parts of her face. “Stay in bed, please?”
It’s a tempting offer, you must admit. But you promised Lae’zel you’d train with her this morning.
You kiss her on the forehead and tuck her back into the blankets. “Go back to sleep, princess. I have to go.”
“My lady gives us a few more hours of her precious moonlight. You would take her gift for granted?” She teases, still not satisfied with your answer.
You roll your eyes and chuckle. “Well, I suppose I don’t want to upset your goddess.”
“Then you best crawl your way back under these blankets, lest you face her wrath.” She lifts the blankets, beckoning you back underneath.
You sigh, curling up back under the sheets. Looks like Lae’zel will be training alone this morning.
Shadowheart curls up into your chest. You feel the smug little smile grow on her face.
Lae’zel
Beg and whine as you wish, Lae’zel is not staying in bed.
She’s got shit to do, people to kill, laps to run.
She’s always up before you are. She sees the time as crucial training hours. By the time everyone else is up she’s already ready to go.
Some mornings she’ll have you get up with her. She has some really interesting of waking you up though.
Most of the time she just stares at you and slowly moves her face closer to yours until you finally stir.
As much as you love her you explain that awaking to someone bent over staring at you isn’t your ideal morning.
Her other methods include holding a knife to your throat, or pouring water onto your face.
One day you’ll learn the importance of these crucial morning hours.
Karlach
It isn’t impossible to sneak out of bed with Karlach, as long as you’re quiet and you replace your place in her arms with a carefully arranged Clive.
You think you’ve succeeded, lacing up your boots sitting on the edge of the bed… until you feel a tail curl around your waist.
You gently stroke the tail, coaxing her into letting you go. It only makes her tighten her grip and pull you closer.
“I know you’re not about to try and sneak out of here before the bloody sunrise,” she mumbles groggily.
As she pulls you closer to her body, you feel the warmth radiating off of her.
How could anyone be expected to subject themselves to freezing winter morning when they have a comfy furnace of a girlfriend begging them to stay in bed?
You sigh, kicking off your half-laced boots and burying yourself back into her embrace.
She yawns and stretches, pulling you back against her chest as she relaxes.
You used to be a morning person, but gods be damned if you’re ever going to crawl out of bed before sunrise again when this is the alternative.
Minthara
Minthara only trances for a couple of hours, so it’s very rare that you get to spend time sleeping, cuddled up to her.
She manages to sneak out of bed impossibly early, and settle down across the room to read a book by candlelight.
She hardly notices when you get up, all groggy and still wrapped in blankets and ask her to come back to bed.
“You can bring your candle and your book and whatever. It’s just so empty over there without you.”
She stares at you a moment before closing the book and grabbing the candle.
You smile and jump back into bed. You were honestly kinda shocked that it worked.
Minthara sat against the headboard, allowing you to rest your head against her stomach and wrap your arms around her thighs. She rested the book on your back and continued reading.
You feel safer and more comfortable than ever as you drift back to sleep. Maybe if you ask really nicely, she’d let you do this more often.
Jaheira
You manage to catch Jaheira before she can get out of bed. You wrap your arms around her, clinging to her and preventing her escape.
“I must go cub, the sun is rising. But you may rest for a little while longer.”
You know she would not put up with your whining, and she’d probably make you get up now if you started. Still, you couldn’t help but at least try to plead your case.
“Just a few more minutes?” You ask, looking up at her with the most endearing eyes you can muster. You keep your mouth and nose buried in her stomach.
She smiles and strokes your hair. How is she supposed to resist that precious little face?
“A little while longer and you get up with me,” she bargained.
“Deal,” you agreed, pulling her back into bed. It was no fun to be in bed without her anyway.
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austinsastrology8991 · 11 months
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Uranus and why your life is a ShiT ShoW > URANUS IN Yer HOUSe <
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Uranus in the FIrst - You are the most unpredictable little fuck-head that everyone loves. They always change > there clothes, there direction in life > their hair colour. they thrive in change unless you try to change them, they are the ones changing and dont you dare change them, thats all they have left ;( Uranus in the Second. - Crazy self esteem issues. these people think they are the greatest then the worst person, also same applies to their income because they dont think they are worth much, until they invest into bitcoin and think they will be the next warren buffet. honestly the only thing stable about you is the perception of your value changing. But they love change, something to look forward to i guess Uranus in the Third your brain and communication skills are kinda fucky you know that dont you. you always know how to say something shocking, and extremely good at changing the subject of a conversation, like you dont have to say much, but what you do say just made everyone go huh what the fuck you say? its amusing tho we appreciate you Uranus in the F4urth - Emotionally avoidant, dependent, and attached personalities. They cant make their mind up on how they feel, so they experiemnt with every feeling to see if they vibe with that. mum was probably very unpredictable, and they wanna be like her. they just trying their best to forgive her <3 Uranus in the Fifth - Okay this one is the genius. This one people actually think your onto something when your showing off because you break free of every social convention, and archetype, but in the most perfect way. everyone believes your special, and you can change the vibe of a room like dat Uranus in the Sixth - what a fkn mess your life is. I had this one friend who would have 10 different drinks in his room and he would drink each one sparingly (they were all warm too). he had some serious health issues, and lets not get into his mental health okay. but yall have crazy lives and you make it that way Uranus in the Seventh - Im not a player i just fuck a lot. they choose their partners based off how interesting they are, if you can satiate their curiosity you got em. but if your boring or not worth figuring out yeah g-bye. also they just come off strange so everyone is extremely curious. they get projected on a lot but they dont mind its a good way to find out something interesting lol Uranus in the Eighth - Freaks who will do anything.... and im not just talking about sex, if they want something they'll find any way to get it. masters of attainment, even if its probably not healthy for them, they don't care if they want it they get it. then the object of their fixation changes as soon as they do get it. they are like obsessed with 'progress' but its hard to call it that sometimes Uranus in the Ninth - Clever minds who are always skipping segments of a speech, or a video to find the juicy parts. They have very quick minds that are so easily bored, but if you talk to them, they'll never not have something interesting to talk about. also when change does occur its a LOt Uranus in the Tenth - why are yalll like this. just baffling people like they know how to make an entrance and when everyone starts loooking at them, they decide to make fun of everyone by doing something a lil bit too shocking, almosst making fun of you for looking at them. gets off on shocking ya Uranus in the Eleventh - They wanna change the world, but not in a way that is practical. until it is. They have a million friends because they have a knack for understanding people, but when you ask what they want or what scares them. it just makes you rethink why your even friends with them in the first place. 12 - your crazy. and its endearing but everyone is this close to calling the cops on you or locking you up in a psyche ward. maybe tone down your retardation. we all got something going on but you take it to a whole new level.
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Domestic Adonis (Steven Grant x Reader)
Author’s Note: I mean really, this fic kinda came about because I couldn’t get this gif out of my head and wanted a way to use it somehow. He just looks so damn fine and Daddyᵀᴹ (I literally hate that I just said that but there is no other way I can put it) therefore proves I’m a slut so🫣🤷🏻‍♀️ C’est la vie, non? And we just love to see Steven confident, comfortable, and adventurous😏Enjoy! :)
Summary: Steven gets some new reading glasses that make your heart skip a beat and make you think of something. One night in bed as the two of you read, you voice this opinion to him. When you get back from a work trip one week later, boy are you in for a treat.
Warnings: Fluff, smut (doesn’t the gif say it all? LOL. Oral–f/m!receiving, penetrative), swearing, mentions of babies
Other Characters: Marc Spector (It’s a primarily Steven x Reader fic, so where Marc does make an appearance and it is a Steven x Reader x Marc kinda deal, but where he’s just there for a bit is why I’m classifying Marc as an “other character”)
Word Count: 3,058
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You honestly don’t know how long you’ve been staring at Steven. You usually sneak glances when you read together before bed. The face of concentration that he has as he reads makes your heart flutter—a mix of contentment and fierce interest. Steven usually sneaks glances at you when he hits a section break or a new chapter, and you can’t help but blush when you both look over at the same time. You love seeing him and knowing that he has chosen you just as much as you have chosen him, and you’re positive that Steven feels the same.
And his glasses. You love his readers. The rectangular specks make him adorable, but he got new glasses, and it has been putting dirty images in your mind since. You don’t know what it is about those specs, but you simply cannot stop looking at your boyfriend of two years.
“What are you thinkin’ about, love?” he says with a small smile as he pulls his attention from the pages in his book to you, his chocolate eyes sparkling in the moonlight that comes in through the window, the beams clashing with the warm lamplight. Incoherent sounds escape your lips. How do you tell him what you’re thinking without sounding like you’ve always wanted it? Because it isn’t true. It’s just with the curls of his hair, the vibe of the new glasses . . .
“You,” you hum simply.
He gives you a tired smile. “Anythin’ beyond that?”
You shrug. “Don’t get mad?” you ask.
“At you? I don’t think I could, but, okay.”
“Have you ever thought about growing a beard?”
“What?” he asks with a lithe chuckle. “A beard?”
“See? Silly question,” you say, trying to return to your book. “Forget it.”
“Hey, hey, stop,” he continues to chuckle, pushing down your novel by its spine. “You think I could pull one off?”
“You don’t think you could pull one off?”
“Not without lookin’ like a ragamuffin, I don't.”
“I don’t know. I was just thinking, I mean, you have great hair on your head all pretty curly like that, and the, uh, t-the glasses . . .” you trail off, swallowing hard and providing him with a gentle shrug. “It could work, that’s all.”
He gives you a soft smile. “I’ll talk with Marc about it. It’s his face too, after all.”
“No, really baby. You don’t have to—It was stupid of me—.”
Steven plants a kiss straight in the middle of your cheek and then on your lips.
“Nothin’ that could ever come out of your mind or mouth is stupid,” he tenderly chastises. “Just different, that’s all. And sometimes, different is bloody brilliant.” He dog ears his page and places his book on the nightstand. “Now, I don’t mean to change the subject, but since your flight leaves while I’m at work tomorrow, I want to make sure my girl’s got everythin’ she needs. I know you have clothes and shoes and jammies since I helped you pack all that earlier, but you have your computer?”
“In my crossbody by my luggage."
“Brilliant. Passport and ticket?”
“In my center purse pouch, all zipped.”
“And your phone is chargin’?”
“Affirmative, captain.”
“Jacket?”
“By the door.”
“Well, that’s all I can think of.”
“Well, I can think of one more thing. I’m going the need . . .” you purse your lips to the side and playfully tap your chin. “Eight kisses from you before you leave tomorrow morning.”
“Eight?” he beams.
“Eight,” you confirm.
“That many might get you somethin’ a little more than you hope for, love.”
“It’ll just be a bonus, then,” you smile. “Unless, you want to preemptively secure that bonus now?”
“You see, as much as I would love that—and I really, really would—I feel if we do that tonight or tomorrow, I’ll only miss you more when you go.”
You look at him with nothing but adoration. “You are just too sweet. I swear, one day, you’re gonna give me a cavity.”
“I’d hate myself if I ruined that smile of yours,” he says with a playful smirk.
You can only smile at Steven as you pull him down for a kiss, moving your head to rest on his chest afterward as you each resume you reading until you both fall asleep.
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“Hi hon!” you greet as you push the apartment door open.
“You’re back early!” you hear Steven call from the kitchen, something sizzling in a pan.
“Yeah, well, turns out all the flight switches from the airline worked out in my favor,” you tell him as you put your luggage next to the table by the door and hang your coat up. When you see Steven, you lose all control of your mouth. It hangs open with a shocked, Cheshire Cat smile as you look at your boyfriend. He stands there in the living room, wiping his hands on a cloth towel with his hair slightly disheveled and a luscious beard on his jaw. He looks like a domestic Adonis. It takes all of your willpower not to rush over to him in this moment and jump his bones. Holy shit.
“Surprise!” he says.
“Oh my,” you giggle as your cheeks begin to hurt from smiling so big. “I didn’t think I was gone for that long.”
“This is almost a week’s worth of me not shavin’,” he blushes. “Do you like it?”
“Oh wow,” you repeat as you move towards your boyfriend. “Do I like it? You look so handsome! I mean, you always did but . . . Well, I mean, do you like it? It’s on your face!”
“It’ll take some gettin’ used to, but, it does make me look quite distinguished, don’t it?”
“Can you . . .” The words catch in your throat as you feel a blush and heat spread throughout your entire body.
“Can I what, love?”
“Can you put on your reading glasses for me?” you ask sheepishly.
His brows furrow momentarily as the corner of his mouth pulls into a confused grin before he moves over to the desk and slides them on.
Boom. Right there. Panties flooded. 
Steven was always undeniably sexy to you, but seeing him like this elevates him into another category of hotness. He looks like an older, sexy professor that everyone has the hots for.
“Just give me—,” you say as you hold up a finger, turning around briefly so you can let out a silent scream before you turn back to him, more composed this time.
“You know I saw that in the mirror, right?” he chuckles.
“I’m sorry, but this is really doing something to me and for me,” you breathe, still stunned at his appearance.
“Ooh,” he coos as he walks over to you with a spring in his step, placing his hands on you waist. “Someone is in a cheeky, saucy mood, isn’t she?”
“Uh, she was before she came home and now she really is,” you nod, draping your arms across his shoulders. Steven leans down for a kiss, and it sends your head into a spin. You knew the beard would probably tickle, but you are slightly taken aback at how soft the hairs are. You moan into his mouth and do what you can to deepen the kiss. Steven’s hands roam down your sides and squeeze the flesh of your hips. Your fingers comb through his long hair and tug at the roots, your body needing to get as much of Steven near you as possible. He grunts as your noses smush together and his hands move up your torso, scrunching up the cotton of your sweater in the process, the cool London air in the apartment tickling your skin. Steven’s fingertips graze the band of your bra, teasing you as you embrace and act on your desires.
“Mm,” you moan, your fingernails raking against his scalp. Put a baby in me.
After a beat, Steven’s hands unbunch the fabric of your sweater, pulling a whimper from your lips as he moves away.
“Is something burning?” you ask, trying to glance over to the range. You completely forgot he was cooking—he must smell something you don’t.
“No, no,” he says, his fingers gently pushing your gaze back toward him. “What did you just say?”
“If something was burning?”
“No, before that.”
“I don’t know. What did I say?” you ask genuinely.
“You said ‘Put a baby in me.’”
You look at him with wide eyes. “I said that out loud?”
“You didn’t mean to say it?”
“Um, not out loud, no,” you blush profusely. “I mean, I’ve thought about it, but, we haven’t really talked about it seriously or in-depth about it past the ‘Our kids would be so cute’ or ‘I want our kids to have your eyes’ stage. Marc and I haven’t really talked about it, either.”
Steven looks at you so tenderly you could fall apart. “I want to have a family with you,” he says softly. He looks over to the mirror, letting out a breathy chuckle as he grins and nods. “So does Marc. But we both agree that the beard might have made you a bit loopy and want to know if you’d be okay with delayin’ that for the moment.”
You smile and nod, bringing your lips back to his for a tender kiss. “Yeah, we can do that part later. When we talk about it more and decide if and yes, I’ll get off the pill and we can go from there.”
“Yeah,” he says warmly. “Yeah, we’d love that.”
“But, until then, uh, I do think you should turn off the stove and come to the bedroom.” You create some space between you as you remove your shirt. “The seats on the plane were really uncomfortable, and I have knots all over my body that need to be worked out.”
Steven’s eyes light up. He moves so fast across the apartment, you’re afraid he’s going to crash straight on his face. As Steven rushes back to you, his hands snatch your waist and lift you up and onto the mattress, his body serving like a cage has he hovers over you. You slip off his glasses and put them on the nightstand before his lips attach to the sweet spot on your neck, eliciting a moan from you. Not only does he know what that spot does to you regularly, but the sensation of his beard drives you wild as the hairs scrape against your skin. 
Like well-rehearsed actors in a play, you shed each other of your clothes, your hands caressing each other’s body while Steven’s lips take extra liberties along your skin.
“I missed you, too,” you breathe as Steven’s lips latch onto your breasts, worshiping the supple, fatty flesh. You squeak as his teeth nip at the sensitive skin, giving each boob careful and devoted attention before his lips place sloppy, wet kisses down your stomach. Steven spreads your legs open, places alternating, lingering kisses on the inner flesh of your thighs before he reaches your middle.
“Tap my hand if it feels uncomfortable, alright?” he tells you.
“I promise,” you affirm.
You take a sharp breath in as his tongue licks along your folds before his lips capture your throbbing nub as he sucks on it. The beard isn’t as uncomfortable as Steven probably anticipated—his hair is just so soft, it feels nice and plush, ticklish at most. Your body is too focused on other sensations to process the tickle, as your hips squirm at the movements of his mouth. The way that Steven moves from increasing his pace to slowing it down makes your head spin, and he leaves you on edge the entire time, pressing one fat kiss on your throbbing clit as he moves away.
“Oh, damn,” you chuckle breathlessly as he slides up from between your legs, the evidence of my extreme arousal glistening in his beard. Just as you think he’s hovering over your body to kiss you and let you taste your arousal, he flips you over, his hands on your hips as he guides your ass into the air.
“Steven!” you giggle, completely surprised by the action.
“I’m trying somethin’ a bit different tonight, love,” he tells you, and you can hear the smile in his voice. Steven leans down over your back, kissing a line right down your spine from your neck to your tailbone. You can hear him drag his hand across his mouth moments before you feel the tip of his cock press against your entrance.
“Ah,” you moan as he begins to press into you from behind. Every inch he puts in feels better than the last, and once he has bottomed out, he leans forward and peppers kisses all along your back and your shoulder blades.
“You look so lovely from this angle,” he praises, his hot breath and beard sending goosebumps all over your body. “So beautiful.”
“Steven,” you groan as he begins to rock into your body. “Oh my God.”
“Oh wow,” he pants, finding a steady rhythm. “Oh wow, you feel so good like this. Oh, you’re gonna be the death of me, love.”
His hands gently caress your waist, hips, and rear, unsure of where they should settle. Steven surprises you, keeping his left hand just above your hip bone as the other one gathers your hair in his fist. The slight yank at the roots of your hair is encouraging, causing you to tilt your head back just enough to arch your back and feel Steven in a new way. He must feel it too, because the groan that escapes his mouth is purely carnal. Letting go of your hair, he wraps an arm right under your bouncing breasts and lifts you up so your back is flush against his chest and he has access to the skin of your neck.
“Oh, Steven, yes,” you breathe, straining your neck to kiss whatever skin of his face you can find. “Right there.” The phrase turns into a chant, a chant into a prayer. With each utterance, he manages to hit deeper into you, and you relish the sensation. Sneaking his fingers down to your front, two of his fingers find your clit and begin rubbing tight circles over the bundle of nerves. You let out a high pitched moan as he kisses your shoulder. “Steven, I want to see your face. Please, baby, I want to see you when I come.”
Steven moves his kisses up your body until his lips hover just over your ear. 
“I’m gonna lie you down, okay, love?” he whispers.
You pant as you give him sort, quick nods. He pulls out and you feel empty, your body aching for Steven. He carefully puts you on the mattress, spreading your legs wide as he lines himself up to your entrance. He doesn’t push as slowly in you as he did the first time, but slow enough so he can admire how you look below him. One of his hands caresses your cheek, and you turn your face into it to press a kiss to his palm. Your moans harmonize as he bottoms out in you once more, leaning down to kiss you and rest his forehead against yours as he resumes the pace from the position on his knees. His hand slips in between your bodies, the pads of his fingers once more finding your clit and giving it a good rubbing. With Steven touching you like this, looking at you with nothing but tenderness in his eyes, and him looking like something straight from a fantasy is enough as you feel the band snap in your stomach, allowing you to come around him while he thrusts. Your grip and erotic cries encourage him to move faster towards his own release, and he continues to pound into you as far as he can as he finishes. You both stay like this catching your breath, how you always do after you find your release with one another. 
“I missed you so much,” he hums punctuating each word with a kiss.
“I missed you more,” you counter, pressing a long kiss to his plush lips.
Steven chases another kiss, a hand holding the side of your face to keep you there as he slides out and lies next to you.
“So, what do you think?” he asks, still panting slightly. “Is the beard here to stay?”
“If you want it to. The change is exciting, but I think I’ll miss that smooth jaw of yours eventually.” Steven presses a kiss to the juncture of your neck and jaw. “Although, if Donna ever gets that stick out of her ass and promotes you to tour guide, you might need to keep it. You ooze sexy academia right now.”
“Oh, is that it?” Steven laughs. 
“Mm, yeah,” you confirm. “You look so wise and smart and sexy and smart.”
“You said smart twice."
“Because you are. And I would have said sexy more than once, but I think by virtue of me being naked in your bed in your arms gets that point across pretty well.”
The smile that pulls on Steven’s face makes the corners of his eyes crinkle. Every time you think you can’t fall more in love with this man, he proves you wrong with things like this.
“I love you,” you tell him. “So much.”
“I love you, too,” he hums kissing you neck as he sharply inhales. “I second that motion.” Marc.
“Hi,” you chuckle as he continues to press kisses on your skin. “I love you, too.”
“Mm, I’m feeling a little more needy than that,” he whispers, and you can hear the smirk in his voice, dragging his beard along your skin in a way that he knows gives you goosebumps. “Did Steven tucker you out?”
You look over at his face, brushing the tip of your nose against his. 
“It’d be rude to reject the welcome wagon, wouldn’t it? Especially when it looks has handsome as my men do.”
Marc smiles briefly before his lips attach to yours, and the way that his hands grip onto your waist let you know that the welcome wagon will be making several stops with Steven and Marc as the conductors.
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strazki · 19 days
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School Bus Graveyard headcanons no one asked for but will still get 😤
Ashlyn has autism. Honestly pretty much canon at this point, considering what we've seen of her, but still
The whole group took a hot second to adjust, but they are now so accommodating to it
Obviously there's the noise issues, but they also recognize when she needs to be alone, and they don't bother her too much about her being so asocial
I’m projecting but I just love these guys
ANYWAY, on a completely different subject, I think Taylor is actually a really good singer! She's just very shy about it
I also think Aiden can definitely play drumset
Top that off with Tyler canonically playing guitar, all you need to do is give Ben a bass or something and then they're basically just a little band!
I think they would be called the Phantoms or some shit like that
Ashlyn can do backup vocals, and I love my boy Logan but he's giving stage manager vibes a little bit lol
Someone's gotta do it
Taylor and Tyler share their clothes all the time. We already see that they have the same room, which most likely means the same closet, and since the two of them have a relatively similar build (and thus, similar clothing sizes), they just don't really bother separating their clothes (probably why they're matching so often)
Aiden does so much stupid rich kid shit. Not obnoxiously, but just out of a lack of understanding
Probably says some shit to the others like "Wait, your parents didn't get you a car? I know we can't drive yet, but you can still like... take pictures with it."
Bro has no idea he's that rich
The twins absolutely love going over to Ashlyn's place to get self-defense training from Mike and Emma. With their father being gone for a while, and their mom being not all there (for lack of a better description), it's been a long time since they've had a stable parental figure in their lives
Ashlyn's parents are just so nice to them and treat them like their own kids. I just think it's something they needed in their life that they found in an unexpected place :(
Ben loves to paint! He took up art and drawing ever since he lost his voice, and finds painting specifically very calming
He's been working on portraits for each of his friends that are all lying half-finished around his room
Even when he finishes them, though, he probably wouldn't show them for a while because he's quite nervous about it
If he DOES show them, he would definitely give Taylor her's first, because that's who he feels closest to
She cries
I feel like Logan, with working at the flower shop and all that, probably spends a bit of time putting together little bouquets for his friends
Not as like a grand show of affection, but just little gifts to show his appreciation for them being around and caring about him
Probably personalizes them a LOT too. Not only does he coordinate them to match the favorite colors/flowers of the person he's making them for, but he knows all the symbolic meanings behind each flower
Like, for example, I bet he gets yellow roses for Ben to signify friendship, and pink roses for Ashlyn to signify gratitude, that sort of stuff
His love language is gift giving and he's never had friends as close as these guys, leave him alone >:[
Okay that's all I got right now send tweet
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doobea · 5 months
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DAYTIME SHOOTING STAR - REO MIKAGE
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synopsis: Being a college student sucks. Having a crush on your best friend also sucks. Your best friend having a crush on your other best friend is . . . kinda the worst. In which, Reo is hopelessly in love with you but you’re hard crushing on Nagi.
-> MASTERLIST. -> PLAYLIST.
contents: second lead syndrome feat. fem!reader & reo, heavy narration in the beginning as per usual whoops, also in an au where bluelock never happened LOL, grandparental meeting, reo x stardew valley vibes, of course y/n and reo get together duh, nagi's been shipping them together since high school word count: 3.9K a/n: FINAL PART OUT YAY :3 thank you for joining me on this journey hehe this was also my first time attempt of writing reo so hopefully his characterization went ok ;-;
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VEGA -> prev.
You get the feeling that Nagi is up to something, after a while.
Well, Nagi is always up to something — gaming and dozing off, to be exact. This time, though, all of his attention seems to be fixated on you.
“That’s not your sweater,” he says, pointedly, one day, when you waltz into their apartment with a handful of pastries. You decided to make a detour trip to a local bakery earlier in the morning, carefully curating the palettes of the two males because —well— after that happened you felt like a small offering would be needed in a way. 
Like how many others delegate, the kiss was rather… confusing to all. Nagi doesn’t bring it up when you three all return back to festival grounds, nor does he bring it up to Reo when you finally go home. Reo’s been texting you like all things are normal, and you guess it’s because he doesn’t really know what to do either. Though, he’s been more endearing than usual over text, which you take as a sign that something is progressing.
Let’s just say that it’ll be weird for you to wake up without a ‘good morning, did you eat yet?’ text from a certain billionaire’s son.
Backstory aside, Nagi’s not lounging around for once. He’s leaning against the kitchen counter with a freshly brewed cup of coffee in his hands from a brand you’re not familiar with. Judging by its fine print font and pastel color scheme, you assumed that Nana stopped by not too long ago. And his gaze isn’t leaving your sweater. Whatever, you’re probably not wearing it correctly anyway. Stupid rich people problems.
“It’s Reo’s,” you say, lightly, and scoot by him to place down the baked goods. “He accidentally gave me his sweater when he returned my things, that’s all.” 
It wasn’t an accident. Reo had made sure to spray that sweater with all the cologne he had. The sweater is warm, comfortable, and smells just like him. It’s nice.
Nagi gives you a look. It’s not a strong look, but it’s obvious enough to make your cheeks heat up. “Uh huh,” he deadpans before giving you a full up-down. “You’re wearing it, though.”
“Yeah, I am,” you shrug it off, trying to pretend that you don’t understand what the big deal was. 
Okay, yeah, your best friend suddenly kisses you and now you’re rethinking about your life choices since high school because you were so sure that you liked his other friend. And the fact that you kissed back? Was that supposed to happen? And you didn’t wear this sweater today in hopes of Reo seeing you, nope that’s not it. Reo doesn’t make you feel warm and fuzzy because this sweater does all of that. It’s a comfort thing and Reo doesn’t bring you comfort… right?
You apparently have some cheesy expression written all over your face, though, and that causes Nagi to pinch your cheek to snap you back to reality. “Suits you,” Nagi decides to end the topic before shifting to the main subject. “Reo’s out this morning.”
“I wasn’t trying to see him,” you grumble out, eyes narrowing as you fix yourself a latte and adding way too many shots of espresso to fight off your internal turmoil. You add a large serving of caramel syrup to balance out the bitterness and then top it off with a heavy serving of whipped cream, sighing happily as you get a mouthful of the sugary concoction within the first sip.
Nagi simply shakes his head and drains the rest of his drink in one go. “Well, he’s been talking about you nonstop, if that makes—” Nagi stops in his tracks when he watches your ears perk up. “—you happy…”
At this point, Nagi probably thinks everyone is in on a poorly executed inside joke, except for him. He doesn’t like it, but what can he do? His two best friends are now awkwardly pinning each other and neither of them are sparing him any details. Then again, he’s not sure if he wants all the details. So, instead of poking a dead fish around, he exits to the living room and throws on a weekly series that he’s been meaning to catch up on. These past two months have been quite tiring.
You eventually join him on the couch, body now running on full blast of caffeine and loads of caramel. “Sei, tell me everything that he’s said, please?” and you throw out your best attempt at puppy eyes because you know that Nagi has always been horrible at saying no to these kinds of things.
But maybe getting a girlfriend has changed him, somewhat.
“You’ll hear it from him, eventually,” Nagi simply answers, smiling.
Of course, regardless of how many times you repeat yourself, Nagi would spit back the same response. Since when did he start caring for Reo’s secrecy all of a sudden? Pretty lame. You zone out when an action sequence comes on the screen and begin texting Reo.
‘where are you’ You text over a character monologue in the background.
‘At some stores, picking up last minute gifts for later.’ Reo replies back with a series of emojis.
By ‘stores’, you would only guess it’s nothing but high-end designer stuff. ‘Gifts’ implying that he’s buying multiple for your family and relatives. ‘Later’ is when the two of you will depart on visiting your hometown for the weekend because it turns out Reo was actually serious about taking up your off-handed comment.
‘i told you not to get anything!!’ You send an angry emoji right after. 
Nagi is absolutely reading over your shoulder, too, and if looks could kill, you’re pretty sure you’d be in a million pieces, burning to bits on the floor. “Got a hot date with Reo, huh?”
“Well, you didn’t want to come and we’re not dating…” you huff before pushing him away. “And stop reading my texts!”
“Don’t text while I’m watching my show, it’s distracting.” Nagi shoots back, and you don’t really have an argument for that.
Though, you just glare at him until he eventually backs off and you go back to texting Reo, a bit more subtly, talking about various expensive gifts that he can get instead of showing up to your family doorsteps with diamonds and silk robes. You haven’t had anyone from the city come visit your hometown, so you’re a little nervous to say the least. Especially since someone accompanying you is several tax brackets ahead…though Reo wouldn’t judge you differently. Because he likes you, in more ways than one. Fuck.
You’re ignoring a lot of things happening right now, and bringing him over to meet your family is making you feel weird. Ugh, whatever.
In the end, Reo ends up returning half of his purchases because apparently designer bags and jewelry won't serve your grandparents that well in their everyday lives. So he opts to buy them expensive fruits instead. Fruits are already expensive in the country, so when Reo showed up with boxed grapes that costed more than your current outfit, you could've sworn your eyes were about to pop out of your sockets.
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Reo should’ve known better than to wear anything remotely formal when he agreed to come visit your hometown. Tailored suits are expensive and difficult to replace and, from what he’s experienced within the past hour, the mud that’s been splattered all over his dress shoes and pants haven’t gone away no matter how much cleaning reagent he’s used so far. But complaints are off the table, no matter how much he absolutely wants to point out the sweltering heat and the lack of air conditioning in your home. 
The plane ride over wasn’t any better. You blatantly refused to use his credit card for first-class seating upgrades regardless how many times he’d begged you.
“It’ll only be a two hour flight, Reo. Plus, economy isn’t that bad.” You reasoned. 
Oh, but it was.
He’s a gentleman and gentlemen should always let others pick which seat they want first. Window seat was a non negotiable for you, and he didn’t really mind. What he did mind was the random stranger seated to his right.
Screen brightness — max.
Volume settings — max.
Chewing noises — sadly, also max.
It’s a miracle that he didn’t flag down an attendant and leave you for first class. Well, flight aside, landing happens and, inevitably, comes the next part.
“Are you enjoying your stay so far?”
Your grandmother comes into view, coming to Reo’s rescue with a sunhat and a bottle of water, and the basket next to her was already filled to the brim with all types of vegetable assortments from the garden. Reo graciously takes the hat and sips of the water before glancing down at his own basket, which is very much barren. He thought offering to help with harvesting will win him some brownie points, but he should’ve known how dirty it would get.
“It’s definitely different from what I’m used to, but it’s nice here.” He’s honest about the last part. 
The city doesn’t offer much in terms of parks and recreational activities and, despite the fact he’s pretty sure his button up is practically attached to his skin and that there’s probably a centipede (or two) crawling in his shoes, the whole nature thing is pretty serene. Your parents’ old home is a cozy cottage right off the side of the country road, surrounded by rice paddy fields with a wide range of mountains in the backdrop. Occasionally, Reo would see truck drivers making pit stops out in the front to either pick up a small shipment or make small talk with your grandfather — it’s completely foreign to him given that he’s so used to the stuffy business world. Seeing all of this makes Reo understand why some would enjoy a life of simple living and solitude. 
Your grandmother laughs. “We were afraid that you wouldn’t like it here.”
To this, Reo digs his hands back into the soil and pulls out a set of carrots in hands. “Sorry, did I give off that impression?” Says the boy who’s currently dressed head to toe in formal wear. Idiot. 
“Our granddaughter has been…” she trails off for a moment, finger pursed to her lips and head tilted, before finishing. “She’s been blowing up the family group chat about this trip for a while now. Safe to say she’s been worried.” 
Oh. That’s news.
Reo wipes off the puddle of sweat from his face and straightens his back. “It’s beautiful and peaceful here, you wouldn’t be able to get this back in the city. Everyone’s been really nice and the food,” he points down to the field. “You wouldn’t be able to get these without them costing an arm and a leg for the sake of being ‘organic’.”
“Sounds like you want to move here.”
And for the sake of earning those brownie points, “Yeah, I can see myself doing that one day.”
“Imagine that. Can’t stay away from our granddaughter, right?” she teases, and it causes him to do a double take.
“W-What?”
She ignores Reo’s stammering and hands him a pair of gloves and a metal bucket. “Once you finish picking the rest, come meet me by the farmhouse, the cows need some attention.”
Reo might have to rethink his career path after this trip.
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“Can you tell your cousins to knock it off, please?” Your best friend is grumbling and hiding behind you for all things safety related.
One thing you forgot to mention, outside of the laborious work, is that your little cousins are an absolute menace to outsiders. The youngest one has been non stop terrorizing Reo around the house with a live grasshopper while the older one keeps throwing him glares and middle fingers. This has been going on right after dinner and Reo’s getting really sick of them and their chattering about how they hate seeing you with someone that needs ‘pampering’.
You huff and roll your eyes playfully. “You think I haven’t tried shutting them up?”
“Good point,” Reo groans from behind. He’s gripping your shoulders as if he’s on life support, shaking every time the youngest one raises the grasshopper closer. “Can’t you just give them an iPad or anything?”
“And what? So they can turn into those kids who stare at a screen all day? No thank you.” You tease, but you give your cousins a final stern look before getting to their eye level. 
Reo watches, silent but amused, as you pluck the insect out of the boy’s grasp and pinch his cheek with a light tug, not enough to shed tears but enough to cause him to yelp. You motion the older one over, who just grumbles under his breath but obeys anyway.
“Big sis, we swear we’re just playing together—” the older one starts, and you simply respond with a hard head shake.
“That’s not how we treat guests in our home. Last time I checked, you guys didn’t like it when I made you clean out the pig pen for fun,” you retort with a casual grin. “Time to head back to auntie’s place anyway, it’s way past your bedtimes.”
Both of them sigh in defeat, but that doesn’t stop them from throwing up a pair of middle fingers at Reo. Hey, down with the rich — they’re on the right track in life. And you know deep down they’re just looking out for you ever since your experience in high school, even if the hatred towards city folks is on the extreme side.
You’re stifling a laugh as the pair leave the house. Reo loosens his grip on your shoulders when they are out of ear shot and nudges your sides because you still have that damn grasshopper in your hands.
“Puke or cry in my house and I’m making you sleep with the cows tonight.” The threat is spoken casually, with a bit of affection to it, but Reo knows damn well it’s a valid threat.
“I’m not going to puke or cry,” he replies, haughtily. “And, for the record, I helped the cows earlier today so I’m practically their mother.”
“Oh yeah, thanks for that, you didn’t have to.” You gently toss the grasshopper out the kitchen window, making sure it landed on a patch of soft grass. “Grandma was constantly raving about you after you finished. Saying something about planning the next weekend trip together.”
“Yeah, might as well help around, you know?” Reo weakly chuckles and briefly looks down at his hands. What he doesn’t add is that his hands are going to be sore for the next few days and that maybe your grandparents think he’s going to move in with them in the future. Something of that sort.
“It’s not the worst idea,” You grin. The sun is down, and the stars in the sky are starting to poke through. You catch Reo trying to get a good look before an idea pops up. “My room has a pretty good view of everything, if you want to head up?” You would offer to lay outside but, considering that the ecosystem here offers much bigger bugs, you decided against it.
Unsurprisingly, Reo takes up on the suggestion.
Your old bedroom is sparsely furnished, and that’s intentional. Most of your personal belongings are currently at your college apartment. All that’s left is a full sized bed, an old boxy television with an equally old boxy stand, a couple of bookshelves stuffed full of children's books, and one of those large colorful beanbags by the window sill. 
It’s a nice bedroom, for all things considered. A lot more vibrant and has more character than Reo’s old bedroom growing up. From what he’s shown you before, his bedroom was almost a black and white minimalist’s wet dream. 
“It’s a bit dusty, hope you don’t mind.”
Your bedroom window has a nice view of the mountain side, and Reo’s quickly distracted by the swarm of fireflies and night stars as he quickly shoves his suitcase into the corner and settles on your bed without a second thought. 
“I like it,” He replies, in a careful, casual voice. And maybe it’s just your imagination, but you swear, your best friend sounds both anxious and excited, and maybe there’s a hint of nerves in there, too. Whatever it is, your stomach is back to doing those weird flips.
You try to think. You’re aware of several things right now. First, your best friend is making himself very comfortable in your bed. Second, he’s giving you a look, one that just screams some sort of smug superiority. Third, despite it being humid and warm in your room, you really just want to bury your face into his shoulder. Maybe you should climb in with him, look at the stars together, curled up and snuggling, maybe even run your fingers through his hair, and—
“So,” Reo interrupts and snaps you out of your strange reverie. “You’re sleeping on the floor, right?”
“Huh?” your voice is bleary, and your thoughts are kinda far off. Reo shuffles his way under your sheets and suddenly you put two and two together. “I saved you from those little demons and this is the thanks I get?” 
“I deserve it since I worked,” Reo sighs, dramatically, when you finally find the courage to sit down on the ends of the mattress. “Or did you want to share it together?” Tease oozes into his tone.
That last bit makes your heart skip a couple of beats. Alcohol wasn’t in the dinner mix and, even if it was, Reo would never be this bold in front of you. Perhaps there’s something floating in the summer air.
“Stop pretending that you live here,” but you eventually settle yourself underneath the blankets too, just on the other side to put some good inches in between.
Reo’s smiling, and that’s all that matters. It doesn’t bother you when he manages to hog all the blankets and the limited amount of pillows. He’s a gentleman, but also has his needy side that he’s not afraid of showing. Not to mention that he looks good in the dim lighting, even though he’s only been wearing one of your grandpa’s old t-shirts after working in the field. It finally makes the strange fluttering in your stomach calm into a steady, present warmth, and that’s maybe more problematic, but you don’t give it any real thought.
Reo speaks up after a few passing heartbeats. “Can I… say something?” 
You swallow thickly. “Go for it.”
It can’t be just your imagination, the way Reo’s mouth parts, just a little, the way his tongue is dating out to wet his lips. You’re leaning forward, hand reaching down between. You can’t stop looking at him. 
“I want…” Reo tries to say, but his throat is a giant lump.
“Reo,” You breathe out in response, head tipping, “If you keep looking at me like that, then…”
It comes in swift moments, with Reo pressed close, with both of your hips bumping together, with arms slung over the other’s shoulder. There’s been those moments of laughter, where it feels as if the whole world has faded away in a blur beyond the gaze of your best friend. It’s cliche and dumb, but you feel, in a way, that you’ve been looking at Reo for your life. And you have, really, because he’s always been there for you.
There’s a lot of things that Reo could say. They’re burning on his tongue, building in his throat, getting stuck there. He should just push them out, just say it. Or, maybe, he should say nothing at all, because that wonder and those answers are all reflected in your gaze.
Both of you are so close that he can make out every strand of your lashes. He can see the subtle shift of color in your eyes, the dark band increasing around your pupils, that slight nervous glimmer there. It’s got Reo’s heart pounding in his chest, hammering to be freed. He’s got one hand pressed into the small of your back, stroking there, slow and affectionate. His other hand is trembling, just a little, and he steadies himself bracing it against your cheek.
It’s got you shivering, and Reo realizes that you’re both a bit terrified.
“I want to be yours,” Reo might be nervous as hell, but he steels his voice, and brushes your lips together, he’s so close, when he talks. “I can’t think about anything else when I’m with you. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing, but—”
“Reo,” you take the initiative here, shifting closer, and settling your lips close to his neck. “It’s okay. I want you too.”
You take another inch forward and Reo allows it. Maybe you’re both getting more comfortable with each other. Maybe getting brave and feeling more grown up. Likely, it’s a combination of everything, and a good dose of ‘fuck it’s, from being young, and dumb, despite it all.
You’re not sure who leans in first but, before it even fully registers, his lips glide over yours. There’s some awkward teeth clacking involved, probably from the fact both of you are way too full of nerves over this, but Reo fixes it and begins to trace his tongue over the small opening of your lips. You move your hands straight to his locks, still damp from the earlier shower he took and the scent of lemongrass and citrus invades your nostrils.
Reo's kissing you as if he wants to swallow you whole. It's hungry, desperate, and intimate in a way that made your heart swell triple in size. The sounds of your beating chest floods your ears as he's pouring his emotions into the kiss, making sure that he's leaving behind evidence that his soul is yours to claim. The heat radiating off his body pulls you in, like an invitation, and you sink further into his touch.
After a moment, you pull back, hands still entangled in his hair.
“Your parents, aren’t you worried about—”
“I don’t pay mind to that type of stuff,” he presses a firm kiss on your forehead. “And you shouldn't have to either. That’s a future thing to worry about.”
That sounds good, you agree, but you’re growing too sleepy to voice it. Instead, you shut your eyes, reaching over blindly to find the edges of the blankets, tugging it up over you two. There’s really no way to move, without cramming at the edge of the mattress. You don’t care, and Reo doesn’t seem to, either.
“Hey, Reo?” You mumble as you both slip into silence.
“Yeah?” He’s tried, but awake enough to shake past the exhaustion, enough to form vague words. “What is it?”
You sit up, just a little, and it’s enough to inspire Reo to force his eyes open. You’re watching him, eyes intent, shining bright with emotion. It’s almost — just almost — enough to have Reo saying those three special little words. They’re right there, on the tip of his tongue, and only then he realizes that he’s terribly in love with you. He’s hopelessly in love. It’s way too early to say it, but he is.
You laugh, burying your face in Reo’s neck again, pressing a kiss there. “I’m glad that you’re here with me.”
Reo has hesitated a lot, during the past months. It’s taken him a while to get here. For once, though, awake or dreaming, it doesn’t matter. He doesn’t hesitate. 
“I’m glad too,” he mumbles, and then, he’s dreaming, of endless what if’s and possibilities with you now in his life.
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© 2023 DOOBEA. do not copy any of my writing and translate/repost.
additional note: idk why it took me over a month to pump this out LMAO but i hope you guys like the ending bc i was mulling over this chapter so many times before deciding to end it as such... anyways, I WILL BE BACK INTO MY BLLK FIC GROOVE HEHE gotta focus on my milestone fics + that ice skating rin series next :3 i love you guys and thanks again for being patient with me ;3
TAGLIST -CLOSED
@celestair @kitorin @popponn @yoisami @anurst @katsukiiishoe @yuzurins @vitaniangel-blog @kunikame @miwafei @astruoise @faeroow @wooasecret @limerence-lu @jaynawayna @iloveblogging2 @futuristicxie @rinlvr @au-ghosttype @wavetokio @yuusami @phtogravi @funnibunneh @idontevenknow129 @startaee @darthvada @livelaughloveisagiyoichi
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7ndipity · 8 months
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Jealous over your collab
Tae x Idol!Reader
Summary: Tae can't help but feel a bit jealous about your dancing with someone else.
Warnings: Jealous Tae, suggestive at the end, not proofread(when are they ever, lol)
A/N: Thanks to the lovely anon who requested this! Sorry uploads are a little slower rn, this week's been kicking my ass, but we're getting through it.👍
Masterlist
Requests are open
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“Hey, whatcha watching?” Tae asked as he found you sitting on the couch with your laptop, staring intently at the screen.
“I’m reviewing footage from today’s rehearsal.” You said without looking up.
“Is this for your collab?” He asked curiously. Lately, you'd been working constanly on a
special dance piece for an upcoming award show, but he'd yet to get to see any of it.
“Mhm, you wanna see?” You answered.
“Sure." He plopped down next to you as you restarted the video.
Almost immediately though, he began to regret his decision.
He knew you’d been working on the dance performance as duo with one of your labelmates, but he hadn’t realized that your partner was a guy, or that the vibe of the performance was going to be quite so... mature.
As the video progressed, he could feel himself tensing up more and more, trying to be analytical about the footage as you talked about sections that you thought needed improving or reworked, but all he could focus on was the amount of roaming hands and lingering touches that were sprinkled throughout the choreo.
"So, what do you think?" You asked, turning to him, your smiling faltering as you noticed his flat expression. "What's wrong? Is it bad? Did you not like it?"
“No, it’s good, really good.” He said, clearing his throat awkwardly. "What do you want for dinner?" He asked, changing the subject abruptly.
No further mention was made about the video or your collab until later that evening as you got ready for bed.
“So, are you and him close?” He asked suddenly, in regards to your partner.
“Uh, I guess? We were trainees together.” You said as you finished your skin routine.
“Is he single?” He questioned.
“I don't know, why?”
“No reason, just wondering.” He said, folding his arms.
You studied him for a moment from the doorway before coming to sit next to him, wrapping your arms around him as you did so.
“You know the only reason I’m working with him on this is because we’re labemates, right?” You asked him, rubbing his shoulder soothingly. ”You don’t need to be jealous.”
“I’m not jealous! Why would I be jealous?!” He protested.
You didn’t answer, looking at him pointedly.
“Okay, maybe I'm a little jealous, so what?” He said quickly. “I’m your boyfriend, I’m allowed to feel weird about some other guy putting his hands all over you!”
“It’s just a dance though, it doesn’t mean anything.” You reassured him.
“I know, but still.” He grumbled.
“And it’s only a few more days till the showcase.” You promised him, pressing a gentle kiss to his jaw.
“You did look really good.” He admitted, still pouting slightly.
“Thank you, baby.” You said, leaning up to kiss his cheek. "You know, yours are the only hands I like on me, though."
"Yeah?"
"Mhm."
"Think you could teach me some of that choreo?" He asked in a low voice, turning to catch your mouth with his.
"Gladly."
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SORRY IM LATE TY FOR THE TAGS @lady-merian and @tsfennec!!
Are you named after anyone?:
my second name is from my late grandma!
When was the last time you cried?:
Two nights ago?
Do you have any kids?:
Nope! Haven't even had a romantic relationship yet LMAO
What sports do you play/have you played?:
honestly none LOL, my parents didn't really let me play sports because I have a heart condition. But I sometimes shoot hoops with my siblings, and I bike
Do you use sarcasm?:
Yeah, but honestly not as much as I'd like LOL. I tend to be more sarcastic when I'm annoyed tho
What is the first thing you notice about people?:
Their vibes?? I don't know how to explain it LOL, but like just the vibes they give off and whether I think we'd get along or not LOL
What's your eye color?:
Really dark brown! You need to see it in sunlight to really see how it looks though
Scary movies or happy endings?:
Scary movies are fun, but I'm gonna have to go with happy endings! And not just because they make me feel happy lol. I just have a deeper, more nuanced love for happy endings while scary movies are just for fun
Any talents?:
I mean, I think I'm decently musically gifted (and the only reason I know this is because I've never really had any lessons LOL). But I definitely think there's an experience aspect to it. I'd also like to believe I have some talent in writing and photography, although I'm more confident in saying that they're skills I have instead 🤣
Where were you born?:
Somewhere in a hospital in the Philippines
What are your hobbies?:
Writing, reading, photography, doodling, lettering
Do you have any pets?:
We have the family dog, a dachsund named Lila!
How tall are you?:
Short. Most adults are taller than me 😭
Favorite subject in school?:
English and literature
Dream job?:
Maybe a barista LOL, ooh or a candymaker for those hard candies. A baker might be fun too, or a teacher. A florist is starting to sound fun too! I don't think I can be a writer mainly sadly, but I want a job where I'd have time to do that still.
No pressure tags!!!: @dont-do-rice-babes, @choasuqeen, @kenandeliza, @offendedteaspoon, @rose-red-ink @youjustfeelthemforever, @rainintheevening, @nerdywriter36, @brendadaaedestler, @ladyphlogiston, @darling-gemini, @the-laurenceboy, @theragamuffininitiative, @rumpletrumple, @madlybattymontague, @its-a-hare-pom-pom
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stillfrownyclownlol · 17 days
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@moonbiine got me with the Aiden bug
I thought a lot about how to start this and none of them were good so, here's this;
Frowny's Thesis on Aiden Clark having Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) based on the DSM-5 criteria, living with people with BPD (hi dad!), being...me!, and general vibes.
What is BPD?
Borderline Personality Disorder is defined by a prolonged disturbance of function marked by depth and variability of mood, pattern of unstable personal relationships, unstable self-image, marked impulsivity, and other symptoms. They can manifest in very different ways (the way it appears between my dad and my grandma for example is not the same), but generally includes this.
1. Fear of Abandonment
Nobody wants to be left behind, that's a given, but for people with BPD this fear can spiral into a paranoid phobia that impacts all their personal relationships. Because BPD is influenced by environmental factors, this often stems from children being abandoned in their youth (ex. My father was the child of a teen pregnancy and his parents couldn't care for him for the first few years of his life, letting him be raised by his grandparents. I also grew up alternatively without my mom and withouty my dad, and once for a time with neither of them)
It's been shown to us before that Aiden's parents are often absent from the house, for even months at a time. He seems very used to this and it's likely he grew up very isolated or passed around between different relatives. And I do think this shows in his attachment style; he is a very clingy and sort of "decides" to hyperfixate on a certain person (Ash *coughs*) in the hopes that they'll become friends, and he does this very quickly. Already so scared of losing Ash on that roof even tho he's only known her for like 3 months at this point. He really can't bear the thought of her not being with him.
On the subject of Ash he's idolized her sooooo bad she's so screwed. Pls the Angelic lighting filter he puts on her?? SHE CANT SAVE YOU AIDEN. YOU HAVE TO DO IT YOURSELF. (But i get it its hard) Ties back into how people with BPD see the world in strict black and white, he can't see Ash's flaws and that's how he defends her so much, she's literally like a savior to him and here comes the disciple complex.
He's been forced to move so many times, he's probably made friends who just couldn't keep up the effort of maintaining a long distance friendship and ghosted him, or even him doing the opposite, pushing people away just to avoid the sting of abandonment again. They can't hurt you if you hurt them first.
2. Unstable self-image.
He bleaches his hair end of story /j
No but really, tell me Aiden doesn't put up a persona- he's gone through the phases from quiet gifted kid to an impulsive extroverted mischievous mess. Don't you just look at him and feel the self-hatred coming off in waves?? Dyeing his hair, getting contacts, the ever present grin that must be painful at this point, it's like he can't...look at himself. Like he doesn't want to look at himself.
He can't even face his own problems; he literally paints a clown face on himself after dying cuz he doesn't want to process his feelings about it lol 🫠
Like genuinely, how exactly does Aiden want to be perceived? What is the point of this facade? For himself? For other people? I think he's just trying to shut away his past and start fresh without having to confront it, but...when the root is rotten, nothing healthy can grow, so he needs to get to the source of his issues.
3. Anger regulation problems
Unpopular opinion probably but he seems so angry to me. It's definitely WAY more present in the early chapters like when he goes tf off on Tyler, he was barely controlling himself there asdfghjkl- but I think it manifests more in him attacking the phantoms, it's obviously an adrenaline thing for him but I think he's taking out a lot of anger at the same time too. Even if some of this anger is coming from a righteous place; the desire to protect his loved ones (which ties into the abandonment too, you are still abandoned even when it wasn't their choice), because peope with BPD see the world as smth very...dangerous, I guess is the word? Even if maybe that doesn't apply to themselves
(Fastpass spoilers)
He's also not above taking his anger out on humans either considering he was about to take Alex's eyes out with that paintbrush and was gonna choke the life outta them-
(Done.)
4. Consistent feelings of sadness/worthlessness.
5. Self-injury, suicidal behaviour, suicidal ideation.
Aiden do be a sadboi even with all the smiley faces on his clothes. I think this is probably smth that was way worse when he was younger that led to that depression where he was locked in his room eating junk food and disassociating, and while he's probably coping with it differently it's still smth he struggles with. I mean shiiiiiit, because of his impulsiveness he does kinda cause problems but God he feels SOOOO goddamn bad about it lahdlsj, he was so guilty about the Ash situation, he probably beat himself up so much about that-
Emotions are very extreme, it's 'similar' to bipolar disorder with manic and depressive episodes, except they happen at a much quicker scale (in the same day for ex.) which seems to me how Aiden only lets himself experience positive emotions even tho he's in a deeply stressful situation (even tho there's good parts too like his friends) because he just can't handle having to fully experience those negative emotions.
Check, check, check! Aiden has zero self preservation instincts, he throws himself off walls, gets up close and personal with phantoms that could easily kill him, actually didn't give a fuck about dying?? Actually ENJOYED IT? But didn't wanna do it again because his Favourite person was worried about him and the absolute high of that feeling completely beat out anything else?? Okay man, we get it, you're living for somebody else at this point-
People with BPD suffer from chronic feelings of emptiness and pain is the best kind of distraction for Aiden (cue: him slamming his forehead on the table because he's bored)
6. Impulsive behaviors (aka a bunch of shit which can be summed up as addictions)
Well, for starters, he's an absolute adrenaline junkie, because he feels so constantly empty Aiden wants something to make him feel alive. And adrenaline is the flawless, biological, factual answer to this. Ergo all his octane hobbies and impulsive behaviors. Ties back into his obsessiveness, which, don't get me wrong this doesn't make him a bad guy or anything, we all get a little obsessed with things sometimes, that's just things humans do- but when you have bpd, it's very...difficult to just STAY happy, like an addiction, when the high wears off, they're empty again.
Maybe a bit of a stretch, but considering all the Ramen packets in his room when he was younger I wouldn't be surprised if he had some sort of ED or binge eats (Same bestie.)
Also for sure a reckless driver I'm 99% sure he crashed all those go-karts he drived before.
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I don't really know where I'm going with this. It's hard to live with somebody who has BPD, it's hard to live with it yourself, it's hard to see other people go through it even when it's hurting yourself. I hate pushing people away, but you get so caught up in your own thoughts, and it just...happens...and when it's done...you really regret it, but it's too late...and you just wonder if things are better like this, being alone and not hurting anybody anymore, cuz they're certainly happy on their own
I don't think anybody who has bpd is automatically a bad person, they just have things harder than normal. People with BPD....they can be amazing artists, or good with animals, or really very kind. They have very big hearts, thats why they feel so deeply. And I think Aiden is a good person, because he has so much love to give, but has never been given an outlet to express that properly, but you can see him making great strides in learning how, with the help of his friends 🧡
Might edit this later when I get my thoughts more clear it's midnight here lol
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prince-liest · 2 months
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Hi! About your staticradio series (which is PHENOMENAL omg😍) - I know you said Vox is kinda falling in love while Al will remain aro. Which is awesome, we love to see rep! But I'm wondering if they will end up as QPPs (who fuck, lol)? Or it'll strictly be FWBs? Gah it's diffifult to describe it bc labels are so subjective and often too limiting, but I guess what I'm asking is whether they'll have an emotional relationship too, however it might look with their orientations? Will Al in particular have any soft feels for Vox & be fond of their unique bond? Even if Vox is in love with him when Al himself isn't? (I worry that would scare Al away😭) An intimate emotional closeness regardless of the specifics?
Thank you so much!! I've been enjoying writing it enormously so it always brings me a lot of joy that other folks are, too. >:D Just a heads up, this post has turned a little long because it got me talking about Alastor and the way he handles his feelings vs his ego in general.
First: I think the answer to this depends fully on how you personally define a queerplatonic partnership! I don't think Alastor would ever go for, like, a committed relationship with Vox in any form, but I also don't think that this would necessarily be a sad state of affairs for Vox, who I obviously write as poly as fuck with his toxic yaoi husband. Maybe it's because I'm aro af, but I feel like from Vox's end, "Yeah, I get to fuck around with the guy I'm obsessed with and he's not, like, nice, but I think I Stockholmed him into giving a shit about me!" is not actually a state of affairs he'd dislike! Especially since it's got that shiny "I'm special!" vibe in the sense that Nobody Else Gets To Get This Far With Alastor.
As for Alastor's side of things...
I think that so much of their dynamic dynamic isn't just set by Alastor being aroace, it's also set by him being a fucking sadist and a narcissist, HAHA. Like, he is very much in the middle of developing feelings about Vox, which (if my favorite interpretation of his little breakdown in the finale is correct) is also where his character arc is heading with regards to the hotel crew in canon, too, but his friendship-and-trust arc is slowburn as all hell and not entirely linear.
Part of the fun in writing Alastor is the process of qualifying all of his feelings with his sense of superiority in a way that is protective of his ego. He is freely and openly fond of people when that fondness doesn't expose any kind of emotional vulnerability in him. For example: He feels a condescending but genuine fondness for Niffty and Mimzy, whom he protects, and that's safe! He's quirky friends with Rosy, who is a benevolent semi-equal who uplifts his ego, and that's safe! He... may or may not have started caring enough about the hotel crew to have put himself at risk for them, and that is not only dangerous to his physical well-being but also massively humiliating, which is arguably worse to someone like Alastor.
He has SO many ego-prioritizing defense mechanisms and it's fun for me to pay attention to because I, too, am someone whose cardinal sin is probably pride. Anything is permissible only as long as it can be framed in a way that doesn't insult his ego.
Anyway, the point is: I don't think "soft feels and fondness for their unique bond" is on the list of ways that Alastor is able to find himself feeling about someone like Vox. The whole reason their whole situation in 666: Live on Air! started is thanks to Alastor's awareness and amusement at how obsessed Vox is with him. He sees himself as above Vox, and knowing that Vox is more emotionally invested than he is is part of the appeal. It's just gone from (derogatory) to (fond). (Which is, guess what? Safe!)
(It also means realizing that Vox is falling madly in love or whatever just nets a reaction somewhere in the region of, "Wait, is that significantly different from what you were already doing?", lol, because the only thing that's changed is the flavor of feeling, not the level of exposed emotional underbelly that he thinks Vox is showing him.)
TL;DR: He likes Vox like a cat likes a favorite mouse.
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