gotta drag the bard out of trouble yet again! and pretend you dont have a massive crush on him, nope, not at all.

♥️ | full version

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JJBA Headcanons

La Squadra x GN reader

Crack/suggestive/Fluff

La Squadra Sleeping Headcanons

TAGS/CW: Insomnia, anxiety, cuddling, fluffy romance, poly relationship (Sorbet and Gelato)

Risotto

Suffers from insomnia so when he does get sleep it's very light, so you've learned how to sneak around the room so you don't wake him.

It took you a very, very long time getting used to opening your eyes and seeing him sit up next to you, red eyes aglow in the dim moonlight. (You've accidentally mistaken him for a sleep paralysis demon before and screamed, he didn't take offense but likes to tease you about it.)

Sometimes you curl up on his chest while you're asleep. He thinks it's the cutest thing, but never talks about it.

He's almost always awake before you so he'll have your favorite cup of tea/coffee in hand.

Sleeps like a vampire, tucked tightly under the blanket. He'll use his stand to his advantage, lowering his blood pressure and controlling his oxygen so he barely needs to breathe. You constantly need to remind yourself that he's not actually dead.

Prosciutto

Never lets his hair down until you mention that it'll make him bald.

Only the finest of silk sheets for this king, along with matching pajamas for you.

I wrote a drabble about this before, but I feel like he does a nightly skincare routine to keep himself looking fresh and young.

May or may not wear a sleeping cap like Scrooge. If you say anything he'll rip it off and sulk for hours.

Likes to read a chapter or two from his favorite book before he dozes off.

(It's giving Mr. Big from Sex and the City.)

Illuso

Like Prosciutto, you need to yell at him to take out his ponytails. Most of the time you just end up putting it into a loose braid because when he sleeps he'll roll over and it falls into your face.

I like to think he sleeps recklessly, hands and legs thrown all over the bed. Definitely a blanket hog.

If it's too loud in the house, he'll bring you to the mirror world for some peace and quiet.

Medium to heavy sleeper, won't wake up if you move his arm off your face, but will snap awake if you shake his shoulders.

Formaggio

It's a nightly fight for dominance between you, him, and his cats. They'll curl up right where you're about to sleep, and it usually ends up in scratches and cursing from Formaggio.

He finally gave in and bought them their own beds, giant mattresses which he shrunk down for them so they don't feel left out.

He likes his midnight snacks, so you'll hear him munching on his side of the bed. You yell that he's gonna make a mess and cause ants to come, but that's what the cats are for! They'll eat all the little crumbs like a vacuum.

That being said, he's a big fan of breakfast in bed. You agreed on a rule that whoever wakes up first is in charge of cooking. It usually ends up being him because he likes to show off his culinary skills

HEAVY SLEEPER. You could push him off the bed and he still won't wake up. Sometimes he'll snore too.

Ghiaccio

Oh boy. You better learn how to sleep like a log or beat it. He gets annoyed by every little movement and makes a big deal out of it.

Takes off his glasses and freezes them to the nightstand. He's been pranked by the gang before, and it didn't turn out well.

Always gives you a goodnight kiss to resolve any disputes caused throughout the day. More romantic and softhearted when he can finally be alone with you. Waits until he's sure you're asleep to wrap an arm around your waist.

Lightest sleeper next to Risotto. If you wake him up too early in the morning you're more or less signing up for your death.

Melone

His room is super messy and disorganized. He always gets distracted on his laptop and his experiments that he forgets to clean.

You were hesitant to sleep in the same bed just because there was so much crap on his blankets. Books, science instruments, vials of god knows what. You only caved in when he finally cleaned up, basically wrapping his blanket up and throwing it all inside the garbage.

Medium sleeper. Wakes up like a possessed doll. He'll stay in the same position but open his eyes and stare at the ceiling, then slowly turn to you with a big smile.

He forgot to mention his sleepwalking, so the first time you woke up and found him trudging to the bathroom with his eyes closed you panicked.

Pesci

Warning: he sleeps naked.

You CANNOT tell me he doesn't have his bed overrun with pillows and stuffed animals. When he first showed you his bedroom he was blushing super hard, embarrassed of his obsession.

You don't mind it though, it's always super squishy and comfortable.

Is always suuuper nervous to cuddle with you until you take initiative and snuggle him from behind, rubbing your head on his back. He doesn't mind being the little spoon.

Light sleeper due to anxiety. He's been ambushed in his sleep before, so if he's feeling really paranoid he'll have his stand positioned at the door so he'll know if someone is coming in.

Went from light sleeper to heavy once he began getting more comfortable with you. He likes when you wake him up by squeezing his arms.

Sorbet and Gelato

It's a warm comfy sandwich when you're there, that's for sure. Sorbet will have you smushed between him and Gelato for an extra layer of protection.

Most weekends you'll have to wait up for them, coming home late and drunk after a night of shenanigans.

They have pretty normal sleep patterns, and they're used to each other's presence so they're not really bothered if you wake up and have to leave the room.

Hungry? Thirsty? Don't worry about a thing, they're here to cater for you. You deal with their craziness on a daily basis, it's the least they can do.

Dang, our first suggestive post on here. Alright.

[Hehe take that art thieves you ain't getting your body pillow money]

In reality Yes Man isn’t flustered by the dancing, but rather by all the nice compliments the Gomorrah gals give him

ignore me i just like meme redraws

just saw about #goromiweek !! dunno if i trust her alone in the kitchen...

[10:45 am]

a/n : i just want to make out with jaemin… he seems so kissable and so sweet…

jaemin ran his hands along your sides, face buried in your neck. he pulled your hips against his and left a soft kiss under your ear. “jaemin~” you hummed. you felt him smile against your cheek. “yes love?” “that tickles.” you giggled. he started kissing that spot again and you leaned back against his shoulder giggling harder. your giggles turned to moans when he started kissing along your jawline. “j-jaem.. don’t..” “why not?” he sucked at one spot making a small bruise. “i..” you got cut off as he placed his lips on yours, pulling you tighter against him. you groaned onto his lips, turning to wrap your arms around him. “there we go,” he said with a grin. you slapped his shoulder and shook your head before pushing your lips back on his.

frog for sonokido

Janus and Remus have a proposition for Logan…. https://www.instagram.com/p/CUSEvvdIWEP/?utm_medium=tumblr

I don’t know why but this broke me out of my art block, also don’t ask me why I decided to do this I have no idea

Reference picture is Shaun Morgan

((thanks i’m going to be thinking about this for the rest of my life))

cw: suggestive themes

also the handcuffs did NOT swap hands somewhere in the middle of me drawing this what are you talking about

damn well knowin what he gon get now

Chubby Jasper appreciation

Take a Picture

Did some prompt writing with a friend recently, and ended up with this. Managed to include all 5 prompts, which were: frame it, fancy pants, car keys, the glance, morning sunrise

A bit of suggestive Good Omens ineffable husbands fluff. 545 words

- - -

An angel and a demon were in a cozy bedroom, somewhere in Devil’s Dyke. The angel was snug under warm, soft blankets, and the demon was tapping a booted foot against the floor as he gazed out the window.

“I could take a picture and frame it,” Aziraphale said, making a frame with his fingers and peering through it appraisingly at Crowley.

“Picture of wot?”

“Of you, dear. In your fancy pants, holding your beloved car keys, the morning sunrise in the background.”

“’S hardly morning, Angel, it’s quickly approaching midday! Get a wiggle on, would you?” He wrinkled his nose like he’d sucked on a lemon as he realized what he’d just said. The angel’s ridiculous turns of phrase were creeping insidiously into his vocabulary more and more these days.

Aziraphale smirked up at him from his position in bed, still snuggled under the covers.

“But I don’t feel particularly tempted…”

“Oh for—” Crowley started in exasperation before cutting himself off. Aziraphale looked at him coyly from beneath his lashes. Crowley sighed, then prowled forwards, crawling onto the bed and overtop of Aziraphale’s body until they were face to face. The angel’s breath quickened. Crowley slowly lowered his head to nuzzle behind Aziraphale’s ear, then whispered into it. “If you don’t get a move on, they won’t be serving brunch anymore.”

“Oh, alright!” Aziraphale huffed. “Insufferable demon.” He unceremoniously shoved Crowley over and flipped off the covers, rolling out of bed in his plaid flannel pyjamas and shuffling over to the closet.

Crowley stood up and straightened his clothes. “If we missed brunch then I wouldn’t get to enjoy the obscene noises you make when you eat.”

Aziraphale’s cheeks reddened as he shot a look over his shoulder. “Crowley, really!”

“For such a prim and proper, stuffy angel, it’s really quite indecent,” Crowley said with a grin.

Aziraphale sputtered. “There’s nothing wrong with enjoying good cuisine!”

“Indeed, nothing at all,” Crowley drawled.

“Your mind is what is indecent,” Aziraphale huffed as he started pulling on clothing.

“Mmm, you should punish me later, then.”

“Quite right, I should,” Aziraphale asserted.

“I’ll look forward to it.”

Aziraphe turned to Crowley as he finished with his bowtie. “As will I,” he said, a mischievous twinkle in his eye. He gave his demon a peck on the cheek before turning to the door. “Everything in its time though, dear. I find I’ve quite worked up an appetite.”

“After you, Angel,” Crowley said, giving Aziraphale a swap to the buttocks as he followed behind.

“I’ll add that to your list of crimes for later.”

“You’re only encouraging me, Angel.”

“It’s hardly my fault that you’re a delinquent.”

Crowley could hear the smile in his voice as they walked down the hallway.

“You like it. Naughty Angel. Always said you were a bit of a bastard.” Crowley grinned as he dropped his arm over Aziraphale’s shoulders.

“I suppose your demonic influence has had some effect after over 6,000 years.”

“Not sure I can take all the credit for that, but I’m proud of any impact I may have had. The results are reward enough, no need for a Commendation.”

“Enough of your cheek. You won’t tempt me into punishing you before I’ve enjoyed my brunch.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it, Angel.”

- - -

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A Walk in Jurassic Park

Pair: Tsukishima Kei x gn!reader

Genre: crack, fluff

Content: suggestive, cursing  

Word Count: 1.4k

Summary: Tsukishima Kei finds himself in a forest in Jurassic Park.  He’s a paleontologist who is off to survive on an island full of dinosaurs.  However, everything doesn’t go as planned. 

A/n: Happy birthday to this boy hehehehe. This is unedited lol. The moment I finished it, I immediately scheduled this for a post on his bday itself lol. This is for @laineeey00 and @risumu . Here you go lol 😁

“What the fuck? Where am I?” 

Gasp 

“Is...is that a brachiosaurus?” 

Yup. Those are the first words of Tsukishima Kei when he suddenly found himself...in a forest...of dinosaurs.  He doesn’t know how he got there in the first place.  He’s already mesmerized by absolutely everything - or rather the field of herbivore dinosaurs right in front of him.  He doesn’t know what is going on, but he absolutely LOVES this situation. He tends to be rational about all the things, but this...this just completely blows his mind. 

Though, a nudge on the shoulder is the only thing that cut him off from his amazement.  He turns to the source and sees you - his girlfriend - perfectly dressed for situations like this. Shirt, open polo with the end tied up, knee length shorts, and boots.  A perfect clothing for a paleontologist. 

“Gotta focus, Tsukki,” you snap him out of his thoughts once more. 

It is only then he finally looks down on what he’s wearing.  It’s a similar style of polo, shirt, and pants, then boots.  It’s as if he is actually prepared as a paleontologist.  A sudden rush of adrenaline came to him as he had a gist of what’s going on .  Or maybe not. 

“This is so cool,” he mumbled. 

“What do you mean, Tsukki? We have to go to the other side of the field and probably get back to the main building and get some help,” you frown. 

“Ah....right,” Tuskki finally hides his enthusiasm and excitement. It only occurred to him that they are indeed in danger (despite the fact he has no idea how they got there).  If there are herbivore dinosaurs across him, then there might be carnivores around as well. 

“Alright, let’s go,” He said nonchalantly.

You and Tsukki walk across the field avoiding the big plant-eating dinosaurs.  The heat of the sun envelopes your exposed skin.  Sweat eventually drips down from your forehead and Tsukki’s as well.  It was silent between the two of you.  Tsukki looks at you as if contemplating whether to ask how you two even got here in the first place.

However, before he could even decide to do so, a dinosaur comes running as if it's trying to escape something.  Then, the other dinosaurs come running in herds to the same direction.  You two finally see the source. 

“It’s a tyrannosaurus,” 

As much as Tsukki wants to be in awe at the fact that he’s seeing a live tyrannosaurus, he wants the two of you to live.  Therefore, before you could react, he pulled your hand and ran through the crowd avoiding getting stomped.  He looks back seeing the t-rex focused on eating a few smaller dinosaurs.  He takes this time aiming for the other side of the field and gets through the herd to reach the forest side. 

And, when you two are finally on safe grounds right behind a big tree, you two take a breath. 

“Shit! That was close!” You said with a panting breath. 

“Yeah,” Tsukki chuckled. 

When the two of you finally managed to catch your breaths, you two continued on with the walk down the forest this time.  The forest emits this beautiful chime of leaves moving, and insects sounds.  Their boots make cracking noises as the two of you walk.  None of you talk at all which then gives Tsukki time to think about all this and answer the question…

How did I even get here? 

He got the idea that he might have fallen somewhere and forgotten all of it. He died and this is last memory before finally passing on to the afterlife.  Or perhaps...it’s a dream?  No matter what he does, he can't remember anything. 

However, before he could even think of anything else some heavy entity pounced on him.  He blinks, and above him is a freaking...big...velociraptor.  His eyes shot wide almost to the point of his eyes bulging out from the sockets. 

“KEI!” You shout completely frozen from where you stand. 

Tsukki watches as the raptor hisses at him as if thinking of how to kill him.  

“Run, y/n,” he said, not leaving his eyes on the raptor on top of him. 

“What?! No! I am not leaving you, asshole!” you shouted back. 

“I SAID RUN! JUST RUN! RUN!” He shouted back at you completely letting the desperation in his voice escape.  

He glances at you and he still sees you standing there trying to find something to get the raptor off of you.  Though, he pales once more when suddenly….

“AHHH!” 

A raptor bites at your arm and at a fast speed drags you somewhere out of sight. 

“NO! NO! Y/N!” 

and...BAM! 

His eyes shot open.  He sits upright and pants his breath.  He could feel his heartbeat pounding against his chest.  After a few panting breaths he finally absorbs where he is.  

He’s in his bedroom. 

He looks down in his clothes and he is still wearing his shirt and pajamas.  

“It was a dream,” he said with mixed relief.  He rubs the back of his neck and chuckles. 

“That’s some dream,” 

He then hears a sizzling sound coming from outside of the bed.  He doesn’t hesitate and heads to his room.  As he does, he is met with a beautiful image of...you - his beloved girlfriend.  You’re in an oversized shirt and shorts probably underneath that shirt.  You stand by the stove cooking something for breakfast.  

Though, instead of a usual smile that shows in his face, he sighs in relief - glad that whatever happened in his dream wasn’t the truth.  He wouldn’t be able to live himself if ever that happens to you. 

He then walks behind you and immediately wraps his arms around your waist when he reaches you.  He nuzzles his head at the crook of your head and gives your shoulder a kiss.    

“Someone’s early,” you said with a smile. 

He doesn’t talk and simply wraps his arms tight around you.  

“Something wrong, Tsukki?” you turn off the stove and turn to face him.  A soft sweet smile plasters on your face as you gaze at him.

“Can you promise me something, Y/n?” he finally spoke. 

“Hm?” 

“When I tell you to run...run,” he moves his hands up your shoulders and gives them a small squeeze. 

“What? I don’t understand?” 

“If I tell you to run...run, okay?  I rather that you be safe than-” he sighs and closes his eyes.  

You, however, simply chuckle.  You raise your hand and caress his cheeks.  “I don’t know what this is or if you have a bad dream...but okay.  If you tell me to run, I will then.  However, you should know that I would do everything in my power to pull you with me to run,” 

“I will make sure I will not be in a state where I would not be able to protect you,” he cups your face with his long hands.  

“Did you have a bad dream, Tsukki?” You asked with an assuring smile. 

He doesn’t answer at all.  He pulls you into a tight hug as if in any second you’ll disappear.  However, you let him do so.  You hug him back and pat his back three times. You two let the silence linger for a few seconds.  Though, as you did, you can feel his hands travelling down lower to your waist...then he scoops under your thighs to carry you.  Later, you find yourself sitting on the counter across from the stove.  That is the only time he pulls away and his gaze catches yours. 

“I fucking love you so much.  You know that, right?” He tilts his head to the side and waits for your answer. 

“Of course, silly!” You give him a light push on his chest. “And I love you so fucking much too.  You know that, right?” you smile once more. 

He nods.  He then pulls you into a kiss.  His lips are soft against yours.  It first starts with soft and sweet little kisses.  Though, when you feel his one hand caressing your thighs and slowly up to a little spot that just lets a moan escape from you, the kiss becomes hungrier.  A little laugh escaped your lips as you definitely know where it's going. 

You pull away from him for a moment.  “I feel like I know the answer to this question, but I rather ask,” 

You catch his eyes shifting to a much lustful one.  You smirk. 

“What do you want for breakfast, sweetheart?” 

He in turn smirks back at you and leans forward with just a gap between the two of you. 

“You,”

NIA’S MASTERLIST 

europa, teasing, handing alexi cards: the virgin shuffles this time

alexi: ??? i am not? a virgin?

europa and callisto: WH

europa and callisto: WHAT?!

nalim, choking on tea: holy shit

europa and callisto: WHO DID YOU-?? WHAT THE-? WHAT? WHO? WHEN?

alexi: WHAT??? WHY ARE YOU YELLING AT ME??? I HAVE HAD ALCOHOL BEFORE??? YOU ALL HAVE SEEN ME DRINK?

nalim: oh. my god

europa: thank the traveler

callisto: alexi i love you. so much. please look up the definition of a virgin.

alexi: what is wrong with all of you. hang on.

...

alexi: i HATE english