this zine may not be about you. for a long time these thoughts were in my brain but only to lovingly yell at my friends. this zine may be about you but not helpful to you at this time. i hope it's helpful to some though.
if you like this zine you may also like the body neutrality movement. and the song "can't go back" by the crane wives, which i kinda quoted as well. leave the rest behind.
this is part of my project to make a zine a day in april
some things that didn't fit in this zine were:
you gotta learn. you gotta learn that learning doesn't mean feeling bad.
it doesn't help you act right to feel bad about previous things. guilt is useful to a point. that point is reached when you know what you did wrong
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How To Support People
Sometimes, when someone is struggling, we default to giving or offering what support we would want in that specific situation. We don’t mean to, but it can cause harm to someone who we are trying to help.
So what can we do instead?
I would ask people: “How can I support you?” But it was often too open-ended. My loved ones didn’t know what they needed.
Mental, emotional, and physical are support types that can be used to give personalized offers for support! Sometimes, people need specific offers of support, usually a mix of types.
Mental support could be:
Facts
Wisdom
Constructive feedback
Solutions
Advice
Solutions
Resources
Mentoring
Guidance
Pros and cons
Advocacy
Reminders
Logical steps
Planning
Some examples can look like:
- “I complied resources for you”
- “Let’s make a support plan together”
- “When I was in a similar situation, I did…”
Emotional support could be:
Validation
Venting
Commiseration
Solidarity
Affirmation
Listening
Check-ins
Distraction
Space
Comfort
Praise
Motivation
AITA?
Some examples can look like:
- “Tell me what’s bothering you”
- “I think it’s reasonable that you feel this way”
- “You got this!”
- “Do you need space?”
Physical support could be:
Housework/chores
Physical touch
Mutual aid funds
Body doubling
Acts of service
Gifts
Flowers
Food
Cards
Transportation
Some examples can look like:
- “I finished your to-do list for you”
- “I made you your favorite dinner”
- “Let’s do this together”
- “Can I make a fundraiser for this?”
We all have various needs and capacities, but I hope we can all find creative solutions to help support each other. Keep caring.
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July 30, 2023 (filmed), February 14, 2024 (released) -
We finally have a BB of Jk’s Inkigayo stage performance! A smiling Tae arrives to support him -
Timestamp 2:33
Tae, at first, stands over Jk. Jk knows who’s entered the room, even with his eyes closed. He clearly was expecting Tae, and he “greets” him by asking, “What?” It should be noted, as others have pointed out, that they didn’t greet each other with the standard “Hello” or “How are you?” This is another indicator of how close they are and how much time they spend with each other to skip these formalities.
There’s then a noticeable cut, with Tae now air-straddling Jk. The subsequent interaction between them is so incredibly domestic! Jk is adorably pouty as he twice asks Tae, in a soft voice, where he’d been.
Timestamp 2:40
Tae explains in an equally super soft, low tone that he had been practicing. Jk repeats in an inquiring, yet still soft tone, “Practice?” Tae further explains that he was at dance then violin practice, before working out.
Timestamp 2:50
https://x.com/v1230mp4/status/1757708423280640268?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Translation -
https://x.com/tcnckclnsmaek/status/1758376772562010549?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Also something to point out is that when Tae stood over Jk, Jk’s legs lay flat on the ground -
Once Tae’s legs were encased around him, Jk lifted a leg up so that he could reciprocate his touch.
CT to Eve for the observation - https://x.com/evexece_kthjjk/status/1758339565239099456?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
And it’s super cute how Tae seems to have left his glasses on Jk’s luggage while they talked -
In the next clip, Jk starts boxing while Tae looks on.
Timestamp 2:51
We then see Taekook playfully boxing together.
Below is a close up of Jk’s soft, fond stare as they box, complete with his adorable dimple on display (and he was focused on Tae the entirety of them boxing, not their hands and movements!)
https://x.com/tcnckclnsmaek/status/1757731117128679917?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
https://x.com/jeonjkloops/status/1757709108927439093?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
https://x.com/kveline_/status/1757721535119274154?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
https://x.com/dionyxxsustkx/status/1757741281340494321?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Of course, this isn’t the first time this precious duo have boxed together. Tae uploaded a video of them boxing on Jk’s birthday, September 1, 2022, posting the video as soon as he landed in Seoul from NYC.
Tae’s post - https://x.com/bts_twt/status/1565075044703019008?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Recap - https://www.tumblr.com/taekooktimeline2022/694602961670766592/we-finally-got-the-taekook-sparring-video-tae
And while it’s not the exact same thing, I also thought of Tae boxing on Jk’s abs in ITS season 1, episode 3. Remember, this is a sign of closeness, as all Tae said was, Today were working on abs,” nothing further, and Jk understood context and lifted his arms to expose his tummy.
Recap - https://www.tumblr.com/taekooktimeline2020/632423882773676032/may-26-2020-filmed-soop-episode-3
And we also got to see this PTD boxing moment between the two -
https://youtube.com/shorts/eRGSXEwaEKw?si=7fHDWS5gv5ztEAWS
Jk looks back and watches Tae as they practice the choreography for his record breaking song, “Seven.”
Timestamp 3:04
Tae confirms a dance move with Jk -
They practice once more, with Tae exclaiming the choreography is hard.
Tae gives Jk encouragement and support, attempting to massage him as he softly speaks to him. I also want to note, as others have, that the staff didn’t react in any way to Tae massaging Jk, which indicates that this is habitual and a common occurrence between the two.
Timestamp 3:22
Translation -
https://x.com/tcnckclnsmaek/status/1757723740887306298?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
https://x.com/v1230mp4/status/1757708897417400325?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Tae playfully receives Jk’s congratulatory stash (“Seven” won first place at Inkigayo!) -
timestamp 4:08
Jk imitates Tae’s 2020 “Gidaryeo gidaryeo” at the end of his “3D” segment of his M countdown prerecording -
Timestamp 7:47
https://x.com/bangtannieslayy/status/1757714312607773013?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Remember, during Jk’s February 3, 2023, live, he twice imitated Tae’s “Gidaryeo gidaryeo.”
The fact he’s so endured by this adorable moment (shown below) that he imitates it even 3+ years later is so cute.
https://x.com/taesmug/status/1621513590330261506?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
https://x.com/koovarbie/status/1621506463335329795?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Recap of this 2023 live here - https://www.tumblr.com/taekooktimeline2023/708525777682038784/february-1-2023
Prior recap of Jk arriving for Inkigayo - https://www.tumblr.com/taekooktimeline2023/724383250492145664
Prior recap of Inkigayo - https://www.tumblr.com/taekooktimeline2023/725289352690843648
Recap of Jk’s live the day after Inkigayo - https://www.tumblr.com/taekooktimeline2023/724837237671575552
Raw - https://youtu.be/WvU6SWsg0_4?si=KmBs-hgA84Jk5bJL
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