#sw angst

[anakinskywalkerog]

My Very Soul (Chapter 28)

Anakin Skywalker x Jedi!Reader

Link to Chapter 27

Warnings: canon inconsistencies (general warning #1: just going to say this here—I'm not planning on following clone wars plots in this at all, so just go with it haha), mentions of death/grief, implied spice (still and always rated teen!) (plus general warning #2: the chapters that are coming will be heavier/angstier as the war progresses, so...tread carefully)

*temporarily using Lorenzo gifs for the "short curls" effect*

Summary: You struggle to master a new skill, all the while being plagued by new nightmares; a sweet reunion is interrupted

Word Count: 3.6k

"This is useless," you grunted, wiping sweat from your brow and pulling your saber back into your favored defensive position.

       "Imagine where you would be," Master Yuma said in her annoyingly calm, even tone, "if you gave up each time a skill proved difficult to master." You sighed.

       "No skill has ever been this difficult," you complained, watching Master Yuma hold her green blade up in front of you. "I think we might need to admit we've finally come upon the limits of my ability."

       Master Yuma cocked her head, then clicked the button to switch off her lightsaber. The training room was now illuminated only by your saber blade, its green light still alien to you. You'd lost your lightsaber—the one you'd made yourself, as a youngling—on Geonosis. When you'd undergone the process again, you'd found yourself with a different colored blade. This had worried you; could this perhaps be indicative that your powers were changing? That perhaps you were losing some of your ability? Everyone had told you not to worry about it. You'd heard stories of Jedi who had forged different colored blades at different points in their training, you reminded yourself. And, of course, Master Yuma's saber blade was green. Surely the color didn't mean you were less powerful now; Master Yuma was one of the most powerful Jedi you knew. Still, while you swung your new blade around, something felt off. Different.

       "Maybe we should try a different approach, today," Master Yuma said, exhaling slowly. You followed her lead, switching off your lightsaber.

       "What do you mean?" you asked warily. Master Yuma gestured for you to follow her over to the meditation chamber adjacent to the training room. In here, the light was even lower, and the fabric-covered walls muted the sounds of the traffic outside. You couldn't hear the passing speeders from this room—all was quiet.

       "Sit," Master Yuma instructed, and you let the air out of your chest, trying to push out your frustration.

       "Master, it's been six months, and we haven't made any progress. Don't you think—"

       "No," Master Yuma cut you off, putting her finger to her lips to shush you. You felt your eyebrows pull down into a frown. Master Yuma had insisted, after the Battle of Geonosis, that you learn greater control of your empathic abilities before you be given the task of commanding a battalion of clones in the war. At the time, you'd agreed, wanting to pacify your Master, and thinking that it wouldn't take long for you to learn the skills necessary to make sure no dark-sider was ever again able to incapacitate you through the Force. However, though you'd put all of your effort into it, you just couldn't seem to turn your intuition off. Together, you and your Master had tried everything. Still, you couldn't help but read in Master Yuma's presence now her patience, her understanding at your frustration, and, above all, her intense worry for you. You could even feel the presences passing by outside in the Temple hallway. Though you had been working to turn off your ability to intuit what others' were thinking and feeling, it seemed like all of the work you'd done had had the opposite effect. Your powers were growing more sensitive. It was like a bunch of hushed emotions were passing around you, all the time. You had to actively work to ignore them, to focus on the moment.

       If you were being truthful with yourself, your eagerness to become a general had nothing to do with a desire to help the war effort. When you thought about the war, you felt an odd, displaced feeling in your middle. It was like taking a bite of  something that didn't taste the way it should—something was just a bit off, but nobody else seemed to notice. Of course, you wanted to do your part to help preserve the republic, but you knew your desire to get onto the battlefield had more to do with joining him in the trenches than it did with becoming a soldier.

       Anakin, now the leader of the 501st clone battalion, had been off-world more and more as the war had progressed. You longed to join him, to fight alongside him, to make sure you could protect him from harm. Above all else, you missed him terribly. When he was gone, thinking of him felt like physical pain. It felt as if the walls of the Temple, once your safe haven, were closing in on you, like you were trapped here.

       You tried to wipe the scowl from your face as you sat on the meditation ottoman facing Master Yuma's. You recognized that she had felt where your thoughts had turned, and you breathed, pushing out your anger and frustration. You knew it wasn't anything but care and protectiveness that made Master Yuma so hesitant to let you join in the war effort. You knew this, and you knew also that, as a Jedi Knight, you weren't beholden to her judgement the way you had been as a Padawan. Though you'd thought about appealing to the council, about trying to convince them it was time for you to join in the fighting, you'd decided that you couldn't betray Yuma's trust like that. Not after everything she'd done for you.

       "Okay," you said, breathing evenly now, your thoughts calmed. "What did you have in mind?" You felt the answer swirling in Master Yuma's thoughts, and you frowned.

       "It won't be pleasant," Master Yuma began, looking at you with apologetic eyes.

       "Shocker," you said, the sides of your lips pulling up in a small grin.

       "I've been wondering for some time, now," Master Yuma explained, ignoring your sarcasm, "about the proper motivation. About how to make you want to shut out the presences of those around you." You held your breath, waiting for her to continue. "If you are willing..." Master Yuma paused, watching your face.

       "I'm willing. What do you want to try?" You asked, impatience slipping into your presence once again.

       "Instead of thinking of certain things, trying to distract you in combat," Master Yuma explained, her eyes lowering, "I want to try to...enter into a meditative state, with you. I want you to see if you can find a way to keep my presence out."

       "And you want to motivate me to do so...by thinking of things..."

       "That I believe you will find unpleasant. Yes." Master Yuma's eyes softened, showing her concern.

       "Let's get on with it, then," you said, breathing out through your mouth and closing your eyes, flipping your palms to face them upward in your preferred meditation pose. You heard Master Yuma breathe out as well, and felt her discomfort and guilt. You pushed out with your feelings, trying to encourage her. Couldn't she see that your frustration wasn't with her? That your impatience had nothing to do with her training? You hadn't seen Anakin in over—

       It began quickly. You felt yourself descending into Master Yuma's presence, feeling with her into the depths of her mind, into her memories. It was all so much more real in meditation than it was when you read her passing thoughts during combat. You felt as if you were experiencing Master Yuma's memories, as if you were there, seeing with her eyes. She was meditating on you, as a small child, watching Dallum push you down in the courtyard. You'd scraped your elbow, and started to cry. Yumi stood nearby, laughing with the others. You flinched, slightly, but it wasn't a bad memory, really. Not anymore. You wondered where Dallum was now. You remembered, though, that you were supposed to be blocking out Master Yuma's presence, and you began trying to extricate your mind from hers.

       The memory shifted quickly. You felt with Master Yuma another memory, this one less familiar. It was a memory you weren't present for. Anakin and Henry were staring at each other murderously, the ground of a senate apartment littered with debris and shards of glass that were rumbling in the Force. Obi-Wan said something to calm the situation, and you watched as Anakin's face turned away, his angry façade falling into a pained expression. This tugged at your heart strings a bit more. You hated to watch him in pain.

       The memory shifted again before you could get your bearings. Here was Anakin, again, charging at Count Dooku, trying to take him alone. You gasped. You watched in terror through your closed eyelids as Anakin was quickly overtaken by Dooku, watched as the love of your life screamed in pain, watched as the lower third of his arm was cut from the rest of him. You balled your open palms into fists. Master Yuma replayed this memory, and you worked in your mind, trying to pull each of the fibers of her thoughts away from you in the Force, trying to push away Master Yuma's memories, push her entire presence out of your head. It wasn't working.

       Master Yuma's mind shifted again. You'd been here before. You stood, now, in the arena on Geonosis. You watched yourself kneeling over Eha, screaming for her, watched her dead eyes staring into nothing. You clenched your teeth with the effort, trying in vain to push Master Yuma's presence out of your mind, but you couldn't do it. It felt like each mind fiber of connection through the Force needed to be carefully disentangled—but the problem was, there were millions of fibers, and even as you used your effort to pull back two or three of them, more grew into place. You just couldn't sort through the mess enough to dispel Master Yuma's presence from your mind.

       And, truthfully, there wasn't anything Master Yuma could show you that would motivate you in the way she was suggesting. She didn’t know that you were already plagued by visions much worse than the ones she showed you.

       You hadn’t told anyone about the nightmares, the visions that came for you every night when you went to sleep. When you closed your eyes after a long day of training, you already saw unpleasant, terrible things. It started out like a fog, like some kind of cold darkness descending after you when you were alone. It felt like an echo of what Count Dooku had done to your mind, on Geonosis, and part of you worried that the Sith had infected your mind, somehow, that they'd left their mark on you. Whenever you were alone, if you closed your eyes to sleep, you saw all of it, every horrible vision Master Yuma could think of and so much worse. Anakin killing and maiming every member of that indigenous tribe on Tatooine; little Leve, unmoving in the Geonosis sand, her limbs splayed out from under her; Dallum’s screams as Eha stared into the black nothingness of death. Not Yuma, not even Anakin knew what you saw when you closed your eyes at night. You saw other things too, things that hadn’t happened. Things you hoped never would: a war torn galaxy; people fleeing from huge ships and men in white armor, men that didn't look like clones, men who were attacking people at will; a coldness seeping across the universe, into everything. You sucked in a breath.

       "It's not working," you exhaled, opening your eyes to find Yuma staring at you.

       "What was all that?" Master Yuma asked, her eyes narrowing. You felt your stomach drop. You'd forgotten to pull your presence back into yourself, in the effort of trying to wade through the tangle of Yuma's memories.

       "Nothing," you said unconvincingly, looking down at your hands.

       "That didn't look like nothing." Master Yuma's voice shook. You sat in silence for a moment, avoiding her eyes. Suddenly, the door to the meditation room opened.

       "General Ohno," the clone stated, walking through the door and nodding to you and Yuma. You broke your meditation pose, flexing your fingers, sore from being balled into tight fists.

       "Marlo," Yuma greeted the commander of her clone battalion. "What is it?"

       "You're wanted in the council chambers, General," Marlo reported, all business. "It's urgent." Master Yuma nodded, and quickly stood up.

       "We aren't finished with this," she mumbled under her breath, giving you a severe look before turning and following the clone out into the hallway. You groaned, watching her retreating form.

You walked through the halls of the Temple and back to your quarters slowly, lost in thought.

       You couldn't pinpoint the exact reason for your unease. Was it that you weren't making any progress? New skills had always come easily to you, and you could admit that the difficulty you were facing now, in trying to halt your intuitive abilities, had you feeling a little downhearted. But—no. It wasn't that.

       Was it the war? The general emotional atmopshere of the Temple and its inhabitants had changed drastically in the last six months. You knew this better than anyone, being able to sense the feelings of those around you. But that didn't seem right, either.

       Was it restlessness? This was the longest you'd gone without a mission since you were a youngling. You knew the long days of training in the Temple, and the days of studying strategy while Master Yuma was away, were starting to wear on you. But—no. You knew that wasn't it.

       The feeling inside of you now felt heavy, dark, and empty. It was like your insides could contain an echo—there was too much space. It frightened you. You were feeling lonely, you realized. You felt alone, very much alone. You couldn't share with Master Yuma all of the things that troubled you. You'd lost your best friend, you'd lost some of your other old friends, and you barely ever saw any of the friends you still had in the Temple. When Anakin was away, it felt like you were alone in the universe, the center of your own very empty galaxy.

       You sighed. There was nothing you could do, you realized, but bear this feeling the best you could. There wasn't a way out of this emptiness. You simply had to endure it.

       You pushed the panel on the wall and entered the opening door into your Jedi apartment, kicking off your boots. The apartments afforded to Jedi Knights were simple, but comfortable. The one-bedroom unit had a spacious living room with seating and a table, attached to a kitchen that contained all of the basic fares and necessary appliances. The bedroom, too, was comfortable. However, as of late you'd found the big bed too empty. Sleep had been torturous, whenever you'd been able to sleep at all.

You flicked on the lights and glanced out the window at the setting Coruscanti sun. The best part of this new apartment was by far the windows—they were much larger than those in your Padawan dormitory. You loved the natural light. You stood, for a moment, admiring the view, allowing the pangs of your empty feeling to overwhelm you, wiping a quick tear from the corner of your eye.

       It was only then that you felt the disturbance. Faster than lightspeed, you pulled your presence back into yourself, assessed your surroundings, and tensed your muscles, readying to strike with your hand on your saber. In this millisecond of preparation, you reached out with the Force, trying to sense what the danger was. But—

       "Oh," you breathed, feeling the Force presence in the air and almost collapsing as you turned, quickly, and reached out for him.

       "You're usually more difficult to sneak up on," Anakin said in a low, quiet voice, his smile illuminated by the golden sunset streaming in through the blinds.

       "Ani," you sighed contentedly, putting your arms around his neck and holding yourself close to him, allowing his presence to wash over you, bathing you in the feeling of rightness and peace.

       "I missed you, too," Anakin said, a little louder, putting his hands on either side of your face and pulling you back so he could look at you. "More than you know," he continued, leaning in and holding his face inches from yours.

       "What happened on Florrum?" you tried to ask, but Anakin was pressing his lips to yours, enthusiastically, without restraint. He lifted you up into his arms and placed you on the counter in the kitchen.

       "I'd rather discuss that later," Anakin whispered hastily, slyly sliding your knees apart with his hand and stepping between them.  

       "That sounds reasonable," you agreed breathlessly, completely amenable to his desires. You felt Anakin's shoulders move as he laughed, then felt him press his hands more firmly around the sides of your neck, kissing you with reckless abandon. You loved Anakin when he was like this—when the passion of your reunion took away some of his politeness, when he was just a little bit less careful with you, when he couldn't help himself. He grabbed onto you now, his Force presence blaring his joy into the air, and didn’t let go.  

       You woke up the next morning with the feeling that you'd slept longer than usual. With Anakin next to you, your nightmares had evaded you, and you smiled, your eyes still closed, reaching out for him through the sheets. Your hands came up empty. Your eyelids blinked open.

       You saw the light of the morning through the blinds on the bedroom window, saw from a distance the traffic passing by outside. You saw the sparse room and soft white sheets mussed. But you were in this room alone.

       Panic struck your heart quickly, and your eyes widened. Surely Anakin couldn't have left already? Surely he wouldn't be gone again so soon, leaving you alone here, with your feeling of emptiness, your impossible training, your nightmares—

       You got out of bed, breathing a little too quickly as you walked, barefoot, into the kitchen.

       Here you let out a slow, relieved sigh. Anakin stood with his back to you, working the caf machine, his tunic tied sloppily, the hair on the back of his head messy from sleep. You glided over to him, wrapping your arms around his middle.

       "Good morning," he said quietly, and you felt him grab your hand and pull it up so he could kiss your fingers. You stepped back as he turned to face you.

       "I like your longer hair," you smiled, reaching up to run your hand through his new, short curls. Anakin smiled back, the praise causing a slight pink to grace his cheeks.

       "I like your everything," Anakin laughed, tracing your face with his fingertips. You stood this way, looking into each other's eyes, for a long moment. The caf machine beeped at you.

       "What have I missed, while I was gone?" Anakin asked as he turned and started to pour the caf into small cups. The way Anakin phrased this question was odd—as if he were being careful, as if he were worried about the answer.

       "Absolutely nothing," you grumbled, taking the cup from Anakin and following as he lead you over to the couch. "Everything's been the same, here. Painfully so." Anakin sat next to you on the cushions and put his arm around you, leaning over to kiss the top of your head.

       "I doubt that," Anakin said, still careful.

       "It's true," you answered, staring straight ahead. The only updates were ones that you needed to keep to yourself. "I'm sure you have much more exciting stories."

       "When does Master Yuma think you'll be ready? You know, to join us—"

 "Tell me about Florrum!" You cut him off, avoiding his eyes. "You were there for so long—has the situation improved, at all?"

       "Well," Anakin said, grinning, leaning forward to put his cup onto the side table. You knew he was gearing up to tell you of all of his strategic maneuvers, all of his triumphs as general in the war. He truly was a natural at this, and though you admired his skill, as always, there was a part of you that felt a disquiet. Was it because you were envious? You didn't know. For now, though, you were happy to change the subject.

       "We had secured the western front," Anakin was saying, and you snapped your attention back to focus on his story. "Rex was—"

       But Anakin was cut off by a beeping, coming from the chrono he'd taken off last night. It sat on the kitchen counter, blinking up the codes from its illuminated face. Your heart sank so far, it seemed to you it had disappeared out of your body all together.

       "Not yet," you said softly, your eyes widening, your breathing fast. "You can't leave again already." Anakin kept his arm firmly around you, but you could feel his eyes on your face. You realized you'd absentmindedly grabbed onto the sleeve of his tunic with a vice-like grip. You loosened it, with effort.

       "We don't know what it is," Anakin said, his voice unsure, leaning over to kiss your cheek before getting up to check the chrono and read through his summons. "It could just be for a strategic meeting, or—" Anakin broke off, turning his head back toward the direction of the bedroom. It was only then that you heard another beeping sound. You got up quickly, going to the door.

       "It's coming from my chrono," you whispered, your panic turning to confusion. Anakin's face broke into a wide grin. You turned around to look at him, your eyebrows upturned, not understanding. "I'm...being called to the briefing?"

       "It's about time," Anakin said smugly. "We're back!"

************************************************************************

WE'RE BACK!! AND THERE's A NEW CHAPTER finally :)

divider credit to @racingairplanes

taglist: @iyoogi @cluelessgurl @layazul @annadastra @graciexmarvel @galaxiasy @organasith @indigoblues1207 @outoftheregular @katsukiswrld @prettyboyrryy @jellydodger @wildflower57 @padmeamidalaslover @em-asian @heavenseraph @iloveinej @leapofblank @sahverah @elsyyie @usuallyunlikelyfox @jadeonce @papadragun @dopejellyfishfury @stxrrielle @lilianashomaresparza @prettylittlecarstairs @deadunicorn159 @atoelicker @arelisskywalker @maythefloorbewithyouanakin @your-local-crzy-lady @dontmindme262 @xenochuguardian @cassiopeiashift @allihavenegativethoughts @hamiltonwc @1-800-nostalgiaaa @heyitsaloy @haydenchristensenluvbot @sunflwrsunnieshine @muthafuckingstargirl @window-to-nothing @shadowhuntyi @jedi-archives @inmourningforanakin @vivsmcdo @betrund @ahqkas @aquaamethyst96 @escapepoet @randomstuff2040 @kenjikishimotosupremecy @nycweb-slinger @anxlaufeyson @magic-magnoliaa @theezlife @unipugrose22-blog @anhsoka @lucyysthings @hopefulpursepeanutdeputy @captainson-of-coul @zelzablues @chrisevansslutttt2

#anakin skywalker #anakin x reader #star wars #hayden christensen #fanfiction #sw fanfic #anakin fanfic #anakin skywalker fanfiction #star wars fanfiction #anakin skywalker x reader #jedi reader #angst #fluff #sw angst #sw fluff #sw oc #jedi oc #reader insert #female reader #hurt comfort #my very soul #star wars anakin #sw prequels #x reader #fem reader #romance #attack of the clones #revenge of the sith #ao3fic #ao3

[vampiric-bruce-wayne]

i love anakin skywalker, he's in so much pain but he's so soft he's literally me he cares so much he's so scared i need to give him a hug he's lost everything he still had padme he lost padme he lost his children after years of losing anakin to vader he finally became anakin again he died with hope he died at peace he'll never reunite with padme since we see him as a force ghost is rotj he still misses her he loves seeing his children again he feels the weight of the world he was a hero he was a villain

#anakin skywalker #grayson rambles #grayson.txt #anakin.txt #anakin angst #prequels angst #star wars prequels #sw angst

[raphaerolo]

Get this man medical attention and a hug

#commander cody #i wanted to draw something bloody but i made myself sad #i wouldve drawn obiwan but i already have so many angst wips for him #so i decided to inflict pain on his husband i mean commander #star wars fanart #my art #the bad batch #tbb cody #if something happens to him i will cry #cw blood #tw blood #sw tcw fanart #sw tcw #illustration #fanart #digital art #star wars

[tyquu]

Just so you all know, I actually had some wholesome ghost crew doodles I was going to polish off tonight instead. But no. The season 2 finale happened, so not cute art for you.

#swr #star wars rebels #star wars fandom #star wars fanart #star wars #sw rebels #ezra bridger #kanan jarrus #star wars rebels fanart #angst #?? kinda #I’m not okay #swr art

[cosmicanakin]

anakin drabbles!

adult content / minors do NOT interact.

pairing. anakin skywalker x female reader.

contains. penetration, possessiveness, power dynamics, unprotected sex ( stay safe folks ), explicit language.

authors note. miss anakin terribly so i wrote this <3

divider creds @fairytopea / @pfpanimes

soft pants fill the air as anakin hovers above you, caging your writhing form beneath his solid bulk. intense blue eyes gaze down hungrily, taking in every gasp and mewl escaping plump lips parted in ecstasy.

"you're mine, y/n." he growls against the shell of your ear, nipping the sensitive flesh teasingly. whimpers turn to full-blown moans as he pulls nearly all the way out before snapping his hips forward in a sharp thrust.

"i'm yours, ani. only yours." you cry out, fingernails raking down sculpted back muscles unable to find purchase against sweat-slicked skin. a low rumbling chuckle greets this admission of submission to his masterful control over your trembling form.

grasping your wrists in a firm yet tender hold, he pins them above your head stretching your frame taut as a bowstring beneath his divine ministrations. his ruthless pace never falters, leaving you bereft of ability to meet each passionate roll of powerful hips locking perfectly to your own.

leaning down to claim your mouth in a blisteringly carnal kiss, he swallows each sweet sound of ecstasy spilling wantonly from your lips. the way his tongue curls around and plunders your own mimics his merciless plowing driving you ever closer to cliffs edge.

"you feel incredible, so tight and wet. i don't ever want to spill myself anywhere but your hot little cunt." anakin growls roughly, never losing stride even as your walls begin fluttering wildly around his massive cock.

a litany of praise and possessive endearments tumble from his lips, fuelling your building orgasm higher with each scorching word. "that's it baby, cum for me. i want to feel you milk my cock - every last drop."

with a cry muffled against his shoulder, the blinding release claiming your senses sends colors bursting behind clenched lids. your entire being shreds to pieces impaled so deliciously on his long thick shaft, barely registering continued powerful drives through your pulsing walls gripping him vice-like.

anakin growls viciously, slamming into your limp pliant form a final few times before erupting in a scorching torrent shooting so deep you swear you feel it pooling low in your gut. emptying himself fully buried to the hilt ensures every molecule is branded solely to your greedy channel throbbing delicately around his now softening length.

taking his time to ride out the waves of bliss still crash through your joined forms, he peppers tender kisses across flushed skin comely sheened with a fine mist. lazily rocking gentle strokes ease you both down from ecstasy, words of adoration whispered like prayers against clammy flesh.

collapsing atop your sated form, anakin draws your pliant body flush against the masculine contours of his own painted vibrantly with afterglow's glow. tucking sweaty flyaways behind your ear, massive arms encircle your frame possessively despite tenderness flooding blue irises gazing down adoringly.

yours and anakin's souls remain joined closer than any physical melding, hearts beating as one to the rhythm of shared intimacy's melody. a perfection found solely with your lover, whose passion knows no bounds beckoning you ever higher ascending together.

#﹙ kari writes 𝜗𝜚 ﹚ #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker x female reader #anakin star wars #star wars anakin #anakin fluff #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin angst #anakin imagines #anakin drabble #anakin skywalker smut #anakin x reader #anakin smut #sw anakin #anakin #anakin x you #anakin fanfiction #anakin imagine #anakin skywalker x y/n #anakin skywalker blurb #anakin skywalker fluff #anakin skywalker angst #anakin skywalker imagine #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker fic #hayden christensen #star wars #star wars x female reader #star wars x reader

[sabictlali]

Can you imagine the twins carrying the koalas/dogs(? and Anakin nervous about they being bitten? Obviously while Obi Wan finds it funny how Anakin is a mother goose

#my art #obikin #obikin au #skynobi #anakin angst #sw anakin #anakin star wars #anakin skywalker #obi wan star wars #obi wan my beloved #obi wan kenobi #anakin x obi wan #luke skywalker #baby luke #obi wan and leia #luke and leia #leia skywalker #the tales of the jedi #leia organa

[to-proudly-go]

"...but it sounds like it's crying."

Based on this and it's ANGSTY y'all

Context: The Force grants Obi-Wan his wish to undo everything that happened to the galaxy and make Anakin happy, but the price is heavy. Obi-Wan chooses to pay.

In a galaxy far, far away, Anakin Skywalker is found and trained by Qui-gon Jinn. He doesn't fall to the Dark side, he marries his angel, and there is peace in their time. But what nobody knows is that all throughout Anakin's life, he hears gentle and loving whispers in the wind, guiding him and showing him the Light. There is always a protective touch on his back, and glimpses of sad but proud eyes in his periphery. Sometimes, he wakes from his dreams with tears in his eyes, a terrible melancholy that is not his own settling in his chest.

He wishes he knows the name of the being in the Force, but nobody can give him an answer. How can they, when the name Obi-Wan Kenobi doesn't exist?

#anakin skywalker and his ghost #star wars #sw #obikin #obikin fanart #obi wan and anakin #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #angst #my art

[rancidsugar]

Fan-art for the fanfic - The Ghost of Our Future

#star wars #art #fanart #digital art #star wars rebels fanart #star wars rebels #sw rebels #ezra bridger #darth maul #sith #I wish there was more dark side era stuff with maul and Ezra AHHHH #star wars fanart #fanart for fanfic #THIS IS MY APOLOGY FOR NOT UPDATING MY FANFIC FOR LIKE 5 months 😭🙏 #IM GOING INSANE #like my second time drawing Darth Maul so I’m very proud 😅 #Ezra Bridger angst #angst

[bloatedandalone04]

Back To You

➪the one where anakin is slipping away and needs you more than ever.

Part 1 | HAPPY MAY THE 4TH (had to get this out for today)

Warnings: self deprecating thoughts once again, anakin on the verge of turning evil, angst, fluff, insecurities, mentions of insecurities, mentions of death, urges to kill

Word Count: 4.3k

Do not repost this anywhere, reblogs are fine <3

Your reflection stared back at you, your own eyes looking at you with pity.

Poor, lonely Y/n. 

With tense shoulders, you shudder out a deep breath and avert your eyes to the marble of the countertop. 

You hated when your thoughts ran around in your head like this. It didn’t happen often, no, not anymore. You weren’t a teen anymore, you had no excuse to feel like this, yet you just couldn’t help yourself.

Taking deep breaths to calm yourself down, you miss the way Anakin appears in the doorway, his brows furrowed and his shoulders tense, matching yours. “Y/n,” it was as if he knew what was happening, felt the way your own body was attacking itself with a sense of hatred and burden. 

You look back up and meet his eyes in the mirror, a small whine of embarrassment leaving you. “I wish you wouldn’t see me like this,”

Anakin hadn’t seen you act this way in many months, not since you were on the verge of becoming an adult. Your shoulders shaking beyond your control, the crease in your forehead, the quiver in your voice. He hated all of it. 

“Wish all you want,” he said as he stepped into the room. “I still see you.”

Crossing the short distance, Anakin stands behind you, his height towering over yours as you look at each other in the mirror. “You want to know what I see?” You quietly ask him and he stays silent, his eyes giving you a look of warning that told you all you needed to know. No, if you see anything negative about yourself and voice it to him, he doesn’t want to know what you see. You say it anyway. “I see someone unworthy of love, of being cherished. I don’t see a powerful warrior like I’ve been told I am. I’m nothing.”

Ankin places his hands on your waist, his grip firm as he stares you down in the reflection. “That is not true and you know it,” his voice was stern and left no room for arguments. 

But you were far too stubborn for your own good, a trait Anakin saw in himself and one of the many reasons he fell for you in the first place. “But it is true, Ani,” you protested, looking at yourself with a hint of embarrassment and disgust. “Look at me.”

“I am,” his voice was the most serious you had ever heard it, something that makes you promptly stop talking. You weren’t intimated, no, Anakin would never put you in a situation in which he held his power and strength over you, but you were, however, intrigued. So much so you waited for him to continue, a ghost of a frown painted on your lips. “You are so much more than that. Your mind may betray you, but it doesn’t mean it’s right. You are strong and more powerful than you even know. One day you will save this galaxy, and you don’t even know it yet.”

Your lip quivers and you repress showing the chill that runs down your spine. “What if I don’t believe that?”

“You will,” he affirms. His arms wrap around your middle and he leans down so his chin is hovering over your shoulder. You rest your arms over his as you hold eye contact, your sight slightly blurred. “And until that time comes, I’ll be here to remind you just how powerful you are.”

-

One by one, all the happy memories Anakin had with you faded into nothing, his heart cracking each time he felt a part of him slip away. 

His body nearly gave up on itself as he stumbled his way through the temple. One of his hands shot out to catch himself, his palm pressing flat against the wall as he steadied his footing. “Get it together, Anakin,” he muttered to himself, taking a deep breath in hopes to relieve some of the pressure he felt was weighing him down.

It was then when Obi-Wan rounded the corner and saw his padawan struggling to keep himself up right. He was at his side in seconds, his hand wrapping around the younger man’s arm and pulling him into a standing position. “Anakin,” he said, worry lacing his words. “Are you alright?”

Anakin gave him a slow nod, his dull eyes focused on the stone of the floor. He thinks back to his last conversation with you, a full three weeks ago, and his eyes abruptly shut, your words repeating in his head before leaving his own mouth. “I fear I’ve fallen ill,”

Obi-Wan gives him a concerned look, placing a firm hand on his shoulder. “Take it easy,” he says, noticing the way Anakin refused to show him his eyes and the way his chest rose and fell with heavy breaths. “Relax, Anakin. You’re needed for the mission of protecting Senator Padmè and we can’t have you falling weak a few days before you’re set to leave.”

Anakin felt his ears begin to burn at the mention of Padmè, his jaw locking tightly as he lifted his head. He still refused to meet the eyes of his good friend, his shoulder raising quickly and making Obi-Wan’s hand fall off it. “I’ll be fine,” he muttered before walking forward and leaving the older man behind with a worried look.

His strides were quick, his chest heavy with a rage he had never felt before as he opened the door to his room with a rough shove. 

Protecting Padmè? The woman he had not spoken to since the night you left him? Putting his life on the line for the person who was the reason he hadn’t been happy in weeks? The one who helped him destroy the best thing in his life?

Not a chance.

Anakin’s shoulders tensed up as the door slammed shut behind him, his eyes flickering all over the near-empty room. 

He wasn’t as in control as he thought he was, and that much was obvious when he turned the entire place upside down a mere ten minutes after you walked out the door. 

He couldn’t help it, everything reminded him of you.

The thought of staying in this room that had always meant to shield you from the harsh reality by himself was one that kept him up at night. The dark circles that had formed under his eyes the day after you left him had become a seemingly permanent addition to his appearance. 

He almost didn’t recognise himself when he first noticed the deep and dark marks that shadowed his face. He assumed they’re from the lack of sleep he was getting, or not getting. 

He couldn’t sleep without you. He found that out pretty quickly.

After he had finished destroying every piece of furniture in the communal area of the room, he felt his bones ache with exhaustion. His eyes were burning and his hand was sore from throwing anything it could grab a hold of. Yet, as he made his way to the bed, the same one he had been holding you on - if only for a couple of seconds that he wished he could have back - only minutes prior, he discovered that he couldn’t fall asleep. 

His mind wouldn’t turn off, past memories with you flashing behind his eyes at a rapid pace. As he tried to get his body to relax and succumb to the darkness, he had no control over the way his hand twitched in the direction in which you always were, right beside him. Your side of the bed was cold, yet another thing he wasn’t used to as you were always there, for him to hold, for him to hide with. 

Now, three weeks later, and he is no better. He had gotten about five hours of sleep in total during the time he spent away from you, and it wasn’t something he had a say in. 

He wasn’t able to sleep in the bed, that much was obvious after his first failed attempt. After he rummaged through the dresser and grabbed onto one of your robes, he held onto the fabric with both hands. His face buried in it as he fell to the floor, his back pressed to the end of the bed. 

He fell asleep a few minutes after that, a death grip on your robe - one of the few things he had left of you. When he awoke half an hour later, he was met with the still dark sky and a pain in his lower back. 

It didn’t take him long to start tearing apart that dresser.

The few times he fell asleep after that were at random. 

While waiting for Obi-Wan to show up for a day of training, Anakin had fallen asleep against the wall of the meditation room. He was woken up an hour later by another Jedi who looked at him with concern and a bit of pity, something Anakin loathed. 

His sleep schedule consisted of quick naps in the most bizarre places, one being behind the wheel of his ship - that one nearly ended in a fatality for both him and Obi-Wan. Seeing as he was supposed to be the best pilot in all the galaxy, Anakin took Obi-Wan’s lecture without trying to defend himself as he didn’t even know what was wrong with him.

His sleep state wasn’t even a safe space. He had one dream about you, one where you came back and you held him and kissed him and told him everything he needed and had been desperate to hear.

The rest were nightmares. Or nothing at all. A void. 

Anakin felt like a ghost, a shell of who he used to be. 

He wasn’t happy, wasn’t consumed with excitement whenever he was set to fly, wasn’t filled with a sense of pride whenever he successfully completed a quick mission. 

He felt like his body was betraying him, and the fact that he hadn’t seen even a glimpse of you since you left didn’t help at all.

The temple was big, but he didn’t realise it was massive enough to keep you hidden from him for three weeks.

Three weeks.

Nearly four without you.

Anakin was sure that when the one month mark hit, his body would no longer function at his control. It hardly was now, so he was not looking forward to seeing how he would be in a week from now.

He turns right and enters the bedroom, everything untouched with the exception of the broken dresser beside the door. His eyes narrowed on the bed and he felt, what had to be, the hundredth sharp stab that pierced his heart in the past few weeks. 

-

“I’m nervous,” you nearly whispered, your hands running over Anakin’s bare shoulders. A single candle was lit and placed on the nightstand a couple feet from where his body hovered over yours on the bed. The flicker of orange made him look so innocent, so young and carefree, a sight you quickly decided was a blessing to see. “Will it hurt?”

Anakin leaned down and placed a kiss on your forehead, his arms tightening around your frame. “Maybe for a bit,” he murmured against your skin. “We don’t have to do this tonight. I don’t want you to feel rushed.”

You shake your head, your nose brushing against his as you did so. “I want to do this, I promise,” your words are quiet and the only sound that fills the dark room. It was just you and him, the outside world blocked by a door and the curtains that covered the window. You had never felt more safe. “I need this. We need this.”

It was true. 

Anakin would be sent away the following morning on what would be his longest absence yet. While you had grown used to his day long missions, this one was said to be no less than a couple weeks. He had never spent that long away from you and he wasn’t coping that well with the thought of leaving you behind. 

The decision to do this tonight was mutual. 

He needed something to hold onto until he returned to you, and you needed the feeling of being completely loved and wanted to get you through the weeks you’d spend without him. 

Anakin nodded, capturing your lips in a gentle kiss before reaching over and taking your hand in his. “Only for a bit,” he said again before the distance was closed once more.

-

Anakin felt the last good memory slip away from him and his eyes darkened, an ache in his jaw as he clenched it again. 

He was going to do the mission; the one where they would be counting on him to keep Padmè out of harm’s way and protect her with his life. 

However, what they didn’t know was that Anakin was now treating this as a form of justice, or, in other words, an assassination.

-

“Y/n,” Obi-Wan greeted as he entered the meditation room. “I’ve finally found you.”

His smile was kind but told you that he wasn’t here to talk about anything good. You return the smile as best as you could, sitting up straighter and holding eye contact with him. “Master,” you say back, brows furrowing when the smile was replaced with a frown. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

The man nodded, his fingers tugging on the sleeve of his shirt in a way that showed he was nervous but was trying to hide it. “It’s Anakin Skywalker,” he said and you quickly looked away. “Something is troubling him.”

Your eyes focus on the floor as you fight the urge to cry in front of Obi-Wan. It would give away the very real fact that you were well aware of what Anakin was going through, and the fact you were in a forbidden relationship with the Jedi. 

Anakin.

You hadn’t heard his name in weeks, cutting off any communication with him and anyone affiliated with him, including the very man standing in front of you. Guilt creeped into you, the same guilt that had plagued you since the moment you left the crying man by himself in the room you no longer felt at home in. 

The weeks you spent without the man you loved were brutal. 

You had been struck with an overwhelming feeling of guilt and you carried it with you every day. Your heart broke every time you heard the hushed whispers of fellow Jedi about how the supposed ‘Chosen One’ was failing to do the simplest of tasks and had become a weak version of himself. One that didn’t show up to important meetings, didn’t give his all on quick and easy missions, and looked like he hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep in months. 

The one who looked on the verge of falling to the dark side.

You didn’t want to think about that last one, despite the numerous times you’ve heard it be brought up. Never did you ever think Anakin would become the worst version of himself, become a person he was so far from and forget about everything that made him the powerful Jedi he had been for so long now. 

There was no way it was because of you and how you left things. How could it? How could you mean so much to someone that they’d forget all they worked for, fought for, bled for, just because you were no longer a constant in their life?

It just didn’t make sense to you, but then again, the fact that you even had a sliver of Anakin Skywalker in the first place didn’t make a whole lot of sense, either. 

He was too good for you, too kind and caring and someone who deserved the world. Something you couldn’t give him, no matter how much you wanted to. 

You wanted to give him any and everything he asked for and more, but you couldn’t. And you would never be able to. 

You couldn’t even give yourself the time of day and dedication needed to progress in your life, so how could you possibly help Anakin in any way?

The question had you looking up and meeting the eyes of Obi-Wan once again. “What does that have to do with you looking for me?”

“If I recall correctly, you and Anakin were quite close not too long ago,” he said and you tried to ignore the way your heart skipped a beat and how you wanted to point out just how close the two of you had been. “Is that right?”

You nodded quickly, eyes focusing on the wall behind him. “We were, but not anymore,”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Obi-Wan gave you a look of pity before he continued, “Anakin is a good person, someone who I find myself looking up to. I’m afraid something has happened….something that could lead to his demise.”

That made you stand up, your brows pressing together as you stepped closer. “What do you mean?”

The man hesitated before swallowing harshly. “I’ve been observing him and I’m worried about what I’ve seen so far. He hasn’t been sleeping or focusing. Just this morning I found him against a wall, unable to hold himself up,” he says. “He wouldn’t look me in the eye. I can’t help but fear the worst.”

Your eyes flicker between his. “What are you saying?”

You share a look before he places a hand on your shoulder. “I’m afraid we’re losing him to something he should have never seen or felt,”

-

“Anakin!” Your hand turned the doorknob before you could even think about knocking first. Stepping into the room, you let out a quiet gasp at the sight of destruction. Not a single thing was how you left it, not even the side of the door that faced the inside of the room. It was dented and beaten in, hints of blood here and there that told you exactly what had happened to the wood. 

You stumble your way through the now unfamiliar room and head straight towards the bedroom, where you’re met with a demolished dresser. The rest of the room seemed untouched and you bent down to pick up one of your shirts, fisting the material in your hand. The rest of your clothing was thrown around the floor, some stuck on the corner of the bed that looked like it hadn’t been slept in since you left.

Dropping the shirt, you turn around after coming to the conclusion that the room was empty. You stand outside the door that led to the bathroom, your hand hovering over the doorknob. 

He had to be in there, and that thought had your heart beating rapidly. 

With a firm twist, your fingers press against the door and push. 

Standing in front of the mirror was Anakin, his eyes glossy and staring at his reflection. His shoulders were stiff, his whole body tense in a way that had you swallowing nervously. His hands gripped the marbled countertop tightly, his knuckles turning a few shades lighter as heavy pants left his mouth.

Pushing back a small ounce of uncertainty, you step into the room. He must have been deep in thought as he didn’t notice the door open or your smaller figure enter the room. You were afraid to ask what was going on in that pretty head of his. It had to be something awful to have him this out of it. 

“Anakin,” You say his name quietly, almost to the point of it being inaudible. 

But he heard you. Whatever daydream he was in was ripped away the second your voice hit his ears. His eyes moved from his own and met yours in the reflection, the crease in his brow softening as a shaky breath left his lips. The feeling of relief was short-lived. “You’re not real,” he muttered, not giving you a second glance as his eyes went back to being stone cold. 

It was then when you realised how much you truly meant to the poor boy. You really had no idea that you, of all people, could mean this much to someone, let alone the perfection that is Anakin. 

He was so messed up to the point where he didn’t even believe he was actually seeing you. 

You felt your heart break all over again. “What have I done to you?” You ask, holding back a dry sob as you take a daring step closer. “Anakin…it’s me.”

He only shook his head, his chin tilting downwards as he muttered something under his breath. 

You blink back a tear or two as you cross the room, your hand tugging on his arm. “Look at me,” you nearly cry out, your grip making him turn slightly. His eyes left the mirror and landed on you. The blue orbs softened just a bit and you watched as what seemed to be a million thoughts ran through his head. You reach up and caress the side of his face, your thumb gently stroking his cheekbone as well as the scar that graced his skin. “Look at me.”

The furrow in his brow faded away as his hands left the counter, his body fully turning to face yours. “Y/n,” he whispered, his hand reaching up to wrap around your wrist as he leaned into your touch. 

You let out a quiet hum to let him know that was really you and that you were here, with him. “I’m so sorry,” you say quietly, your thumb continuing to stroke his face while his stroked the skin of your wrist.

His eyes were still glossy and his whole being still seemed as if it was far away. Your other hand grasped his shoulder as you stepped closer, trying to think of what to do to get him to fully come back. 

A delirious grin formed on his lips as he looked at you, still not believing you were actually there. “I missed you,” he murmured, his eyes flickering all over your face before he began to turn back towards the mirror. 

You placed both your hands on his face and pulled him away from whatever trance the mirror held over him. Tugging his head down, you press your forehead against his. “I’m here,” you whisper, reaching one hand down to grab his and place it on your waist. “I’m here and I’m so sorry.”

 Anakin furrowed his brows again, his head shaking as his gloved hand tightened its grip on you. “It’s not…you’re not-”

“I am,” you cut him off, squeezing your eyes shut tightly as if it’ll help stop the love of your life from turning on everything he had going for him. You weren’t sure what to do at this point. Anakin was in denial, seemingly stuck in a very fragile state and balancing on a very thin edge of becoming something he swore he wouldn’t. A tear slips down your face as you brush your nose against his, an act you’ve done too many times to count. “Please….come back to me.”

Whatever had a hold on his mind seemed to let go as you said the words he had been craving to hear, the same ones you murmured to him in the first and only dream he had about you since you left - the same ones he said to you.

He pulled back just slightly, his eyes staring into yours as his face relaxed for the first time in nearly a month. His lip quivered and his eyes filled with unshed tears, his hand that wasn’t on your waist coming up to grip the back of your neck as he pulled you into him.

You wrapped your arms around him as your face pressed against his chest, a sigh of relief and desperation leaving both of you. 

“Angel,” the name falls easily from his lips, his arms tightening around you as if you would disappear at any given second - and he’d be alone again. “You’ve come back to me.”

“I never should have left you,” you say back, your voice muffled due to the sobs you were holding back. “I’m so sorry, Anakin. Please, forgive me.”

His hand slides upwards to cradle the back of your head as he quietly hushes you. “It’s okay, my love,” he says quietly, his mind becoming foggy at the fact that he had you back in his arms. “You’re okay.” He presses his lips to the side of your head, his hand refraining from pulling you back in when he feels you push against him.

“I’m not,” you shake your head, your hands fisting his shirt. “I haven’t been. I feel so bad, Anakin. I hate that I hurt you. The guilt has been eating me alive, I’m so sorry for everything I put you through.”

Your sweet voice was music to his ears and he brought his hand around to the front of your head, where his thumb brushes away your tears as he quiets you once more. “It’s alright, angel,” he says, pulling you close once again. “We’ve found each other again, there’s nothing to be sorry for. We’re okay.”

Before you could nod in agreement, his lips pressed to yours in a gentle yet firm kiss. The action made his own tears fall as he closed his eyes, begging to anyone listening that you’d still be there when he opened them again. “I love you,” you mumbled when you pulled away, your forehead resting against his cheek. “So much.”

“I love you,” he says in return, holding you close and inhaling the scent that only belonged to you - the scent that made him dizzy. “Take me back.” Let me live again.

You nod quickly, leaning up to kiss him again. “It’s you and me,” you say against his mouth, feeling the way his arms wrapped protectively around your middle. 

“You and me,” he agreed, kissing you once again. Forever.

-

Part 3

#anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker x female reader #sw anakin #anakin skywalker x you #anakin fanfiction #tcw anakin #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin skywalker imagine #anakin star wars #hayden christensen #hayden christensen imagine #hayden christensen x reader #hayden christensen gif #hayden christensen edit #anakin angst #anakin skywalker angst #anakin skywalker fluff #may the force be with you #may the 4th be with you #happy star wars day

[xylavie]

I’m gonna look for my tiny hux doodles. So in the mean time, have some of my angst classics lol.

#xylavie #xylavie personal #art #fanart #illustration #artists on tumblr #digital art #star wars #armitage hux #kylo ren #tw: death #force ghost kylo #kylux #angst #sw

[anakinskywalkerog]

yep this is a shameless advertisement for my fic My Very Soul

if you haven’t read it yet and this seems like something you may be interested in…😈😈😈

#hayden christensen #anakin skywalker #anakin x reader #anakin skywalker x reader #fanfiction #star wars fanfiction #sw fanfic #anakin fanfic #slow burn #angst #fluff #sw fluff #sw angst #anakin fluff #my very soul #enemies to lovers

[stargirl-writes]

promises

pairing : f! reader x rots! anakin skywalker

word count : 1k

masterlist | ao3 link

summary

ever since anakin had killed dooku, your anxiety has never settled. for you were watching him slowly lose himself in the war. and you lie late at night lost in the idea that maybe, being with you didn't make any difference at all. so, you watched him sleep, at peace, stealing what little time you could have with him.

tags : angst, comfort, love, flangst (?)

warnings : pretty much none, just angsty stuff to cry to hehe

notes : hello beautiful people! i finished the film past lives and there's this one line that just shattered me 😭 so i just wanna share this little imagine before i go to sleep :) hope ya like it 🪽🩷

likes, comments, and reblogs are highly appreciated ! (and fuels me hehe)

Anakin Skywalker is your secret.

Your beautiful little secret.

Here wrapped in these sheets, where everything softens. Hushed. Kissed by the gentle rays of the moonlight.

You have been awake for some time now. But you didn't dare move. Anakin was still deep in his dreams exhausted from the day before. Despite his slumber, his arms wrap around you protectively.

You placed your head on his chest, following his breathing and listening to the soft thuds of his heart.

Your gaze lands on his peaceful expression.

How can someone look so beautifu?

You thought, he looked like the people in the paintings. Like how an artist would imagine a being with the perfect proportions. And he'd move as if each stroke is intended with grace.

The force made him. You'd sometimes catch yourself lost in his eyes, staring, studying the way it'd crease at the ends when he smiles. Is he even human? You'd think to yourself. He is the galaxy made flesh. That has to account for his prettiness, you think.

You take a deep breath; the scales of the ongoing war are further tipped to the Republic's advantage after Anakin had killed Dooku.

It was so close. Even the air itself has shifted. You can feel it, the end. You can almost visualize it.

Maybe then, things will change...

Selfishly, you feel your heart ache by the little amount of time you could share with Anakin. You can't help it, you have always belonged to him, and for that, you have suffered.

He is the Jedi Order's first. Before you can call him yours. You're not even sure if he is his own's anymore. Because you've watched how this war takes so much of him.

Be smarter, Be more cunning, Be more ruthless. Offer yourself again and again and again.

There's so little of him that remains.

You blinked, sighing once more. You reminded yourself that you are here, tangled in his embrace. It was enough to know that here he lies, with you.

Anakin shifts and you hold your breath. You begged the Gods to not wake him, not yet, let me have him, just for now.

Anakin mutters something. Huttese, the language he grew up on. Your eyebrows furrowed, you never really got to understanding the language even after studying it.

His heart paces under your touch. You kept your gaze on his face, deciding whether you should wake him up or have him rest.

He has been having so many nightmares lately...

His eyes abruptly open and you lent your weight on your elbow to better survey him.

"It's alright, Ani, it was just a dream" You spoke softly, careful not to startle him.

Anakin's wide-eye terror softens at the sight of you, his chest heaves trying to catch his breath.

"It's alright" You coo once more, placing a kiss on his forehead.

He presses his eyes close, and his eyes are intent in yours as he follows your breathing.

You can't help but feel a sting in your heart. He is reaching his limit, and it worries you that whenever he's away, he is close to blurring the lines and crossing it.

Anakin presses his face to your clavicle, and your hands find a way to tangle in his hair. Noticing his silence, you spoke soothingly "What's on your mind, Ani?"

Anakin's breath felt warm against your neck. You used to be able to read Anakin's thoughts. Like he'd write it down in words on pages of a novel for you to be able to understand him. But now, he's been more distant, more incoherent, and you feel as though you have to decipher every little thing that he allows you to see.

"mmm—just tired" Anakin's voice was gravelly and of resignation.

Stop turning me away. You wanted to say. But you already know that the more you try to push him, the further he'll hide away.

You take a deep breath, wishing you could take away some of the weight off his shoulders. "You know you speak in Huttese when you're asleep"

"I do?" Anakin tilts his chin, his eyes are still half-asleep.

"Yeah, I could never understand it though" You managed a wan smile.

"That's probably good for you, Huttese is a very coarse language" He claims.

"Still—" You held back your tongue, deciding it would only drive him away if you asked about his dream.

"I fear that you dream in a language I can't understand"

The silence hung. Anakin must be asleep.

Your gaze moved faraway— deep in contemplation. Wondering if you being in his life made any difference at all.

"You know, I only ever feel like myself when I'm with you, right?" Anakin speaks, voice barely above a whisper.

Your cheeks flushed scarlet, realizing your force signature may have revealed your anxieties.

"I know"

Anakin shifts his head, eyes latched on to you like he was memorizing every detail of your face.

"Ani" you began, "If there's a life after it all, will you come with me?"

Anakin's eyebrows flashed at the suddenness of your question.

"What do you mean?" He places his hand on the small of your back, tracing small circles.

"Well, I'm only wondering, will you come with me, even then?"

Anakin's expression softens, recognizing your fears. You were losing him, slowly, bit by bit. And if you're bound to him in this life, why not in the other?

When you can finally feel like you're not constantly the only one holding on.

He doesn't answer for a while, you feel the need to ramble, to withdraw.

It was silly of you to ask, he is free to choose whatever life he wants to live after it all, besides, if he decides to want to rest, you won't take that away from him, if he ever wants to—

"I'll go wherever you go" he declares, halting the thoughts plaguing your mind.

His eyes drift away from yours "I can't... I know what my duty requires of me and I'm sorry if I haven't been here for you."

"But, I'll love you in a time that isn't stolen" he promises, tucking your hair away from your face.

You felt tears glistening in your eyes. You smiled, leaning in to tenderly kiss Anakin.

The hope of it all would be enough to keep you going.

Just a little while longer.

© to @cafekitsune for the borders as always !

#anakin skywalker #anakin (ciella's ver) #anakin x reader #anakin x you #star wars #star wars anakin #sw #anakin #anakin fanfiction #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker x reader #star wars x reader #anakin skywalker imagine #anakin star wars #sw anakin #anakin angst #anakin fluff #anakin imagine #Spotify #—a.s. (ciella's ver)

[sheisagoddess]

𝙰𝙷🫦

#she is a goddess #anakin x you #tcw anakin #clone wars anakin #anakin skywalker #anakin angst #anakin x reader #anakin fluff #anakin and ahsoka #anakin icons #sw anakin #star wars anakin #anakin smut #anakin imagine #anakin and padme #obi wan and anakin #anakin fanfiction

[stars4anakin]

do not avenge me. —⁠ ANAKIN SKYWALKER

summary: when he held your dying body in his arms, you begged him of one thing, do not avenge me.

warnings: major character death, angst, (kind of) secret relationship coming out..haha

pairings: Anakin Skywalker x Gn!Reader

drabble ... MASTERLIST

You felt it coming, you felt his presence. It was dark, he was gone too far.

Maybe if you payed more attention to your own safety rather than Anakin's you wouldn't be on the floor, your head resting in the lap of your husband, tears streaming down your cheeks. God, why were you crying? You were not supposed to be weak.

Your attempt to move only prompted another cry from you, Anakin held you tightly, and his words barely reached you, He was yelling, but the words were distant and fragmented. He was crying, and you desperately wished he wouldn't.

"Stop crying, I'm okay-" you managed to whisper, but it only led him to hush you gently. His voice, despite the pain, was a nice sound, his voice made the pain go away, but you felt it, you were weak but his darkness was not. He felt cold, you felt the anger, the fear he's going to cause in the galaxy. You needed to get up, to reassure him that you were fine, but you couldn't, the pain persisted, relentless, excruciating. god did it hurt.

You turned your head to Obi-Wan, who had a knowing expression. The look he gave you spoke volumes, telling you what you already feared. You were fading away, you're dying.

Turning back to Anakin, you saw tears still streaming down his face. His hand slipped under your back, drawing you closer to his chest, his sobs growing louder, and you realized you couldn't escape the deafening sound. No, it wasn't leaving; it was intensifying, and it felt like it would never end.

"Ani," you choked, "Promise me, do not…" The pain was overwhelming, making it difficult to speak. "Do not avenge me."

There was no verbal response, just a gut-wrenching cry and his hand gripping yours even tighter. You continued, your voice weak, "You are good. Do not let me—don't let take that away from you."

Perhaps that was the moment he truly understood. You knew you were slipping away, but the transition was painless. What hurt more was hearing the distant screams of Anakin, his desperate pleas as you left your Anakin behind, forever.

a/n: djsfkjasenkdjfnjsakdfn Sorry I needed a cry!!

#꒰ ੭ 𓈒 ⊹ evana writes #star wars #sw anakin #anakin skywalker #anakin x reader #darth vader #anakin fanfiction #anakin skywalker x you #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin skywalker angst #star wars angst #angst #obi wan kenobi #palpatine #count dooku #obi wan and anakin #obi wan x reader

[cosmicanakin]

giving your nerdy bf hickeys.

adult content | minors do NOT interact.

pairing. nerd!anakin x female reader.

contains. smut w no plot, hickeys.

authors note. love my nerdy baby <3

you’re hanging out with your boyfriend anakin at his small apartment, curled up together on the couch. as usual, your boyfriend has been reading some textbook on hyperspace mechanics, totally absorbed in the dense theories and equations.

smiling to yourself, you snake your arms around anakin’s waist from behind and place a gentle kiss to his neck. “put the nerdy stuff away for a bit, handsome. let me have your attention,” you murmur, nibbling his earlobe playfully.

anakin shivers, closing the book reluctantly before turning in your embrace. “mm, you definitely have my attention now, angel,” he rumbles, voice already deepening with want. you grin, pressing soft pecks along his strong jawline as anakin practically melts beneath your touch.

brushing his messy hair back, you suck lightly at the tender place below his ear. anakin sighs airily, hands coming up to your hair as you leave a faint pink mark. a thought suddenly occurs and you pull back with a mischievous glint, biting your lip.

“ani...what would you think about me giving you a hickey?” you ask softly. his eyes widen slightly behind his glasses before his cheeks flush a dark rose. “i, uh...i don’t know,” anakin stammers shyly, ever-modest and innocent. “i’ve never had one before.”

you smile reassuringly, caressing his face. “i won't do anything you’re not comfortable with, baby. i just think you’d look so sexy all marked up...” anakin’s blush deepens impossibly but he nods, gazing at you full of trust. “okay, you can try.”

leaning back in, you kiss along the strong column of his neck with tender reverence before sucking sharply below his adam’s apple. anakin gasps harshly, fingers gripping your sides tightly as you work the skin with your lips and tongue. he tastes faintly salty, musky, all man.

it doesn't take long for the beautiful purple bruise to bloom under your ministrations, standing out stark against anakin’s pale skin. sitting back to admire your handiwork, you can’t help a satisfied grin. “looks incredible, ani. so hot,” you purr, cradling his face for a deep kiss.

anakin seems almost in a trance, tenderly fingering the mark almost disbelievingly. “i...didn’t think it would feel so good,” he admits shyly, delight dancing in his gorgeous eyes. you hug him close, stroking his hair soothingly.

“i'm so happy you liked it. you deserve to feel cherished,” you murmur in his ear, brushing kisses along his strong jaw. anakin smiles sweetly, cupping your cheek as an idea comes to him too. “can i...try giving you one?” he asks hopefully.

you blink in surprise before nodding eagerly, already melting under his rare confidence. shifting to straddle his muscular thighs, you offer your neck invitingly. “please do, handsome,” you whisper, carding fingers through his thick hair encouragingly.

anakin takes a shaky breath, hands settling warm and sure at your waist, before tentatively pressing his lips below your jaw. you sigh contentedly as his mouth works, less skilled than your own but filled with loving care. soon a throbbing point of heat forms under your skin, making you squirm deliciously in anakin's lap.

he pulls back to gauge his work, tentative thumb brushing over the fluttering pulsepoint. “is it okay? did i do it right?” anakin questions timidly, always the gentle soul. you smile tenderly, cupping his face between your hands.

“it’s perfect. you make me feel so good,” you reassure, kissing him deeply. anakin grins with boyish delight, pulling you closer still. as the afternoon wanes and shadows lengthen, you trade sweet nothings and marks of affection between giggling bouts until dark.

later, when you bid him farewell for the night, anakin can’t help a soft gasp seeing the artwork you did on his neck in the mirror. you smirk playfully, pleased by his reaction, before tugging him down for a last passionate kiss. “goodnight, honey. see you tomorrow,” you whisper against his lips.

anakin smiles dopily, eyes glazed and hooded. “goodnight, angel. sleep well,” he rumbles, squeezing you tight once more before reluctantly letting go. as you walk home glowing, already missing his arms, you can’t stop touching the faintly throbbing hickey upon your skin - a beautiful brand of anakin's care, his very first. you know this won't be the last intimate secret you two share.

#﹙ kari writes 𝜗𝜚 ﹚ #nerd!anakin #anakin #modern!anakin #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker smut #anakin smut #anakin x fem reader #anakin skywalker blurb #anakin skywalker x reader #anakin skywalker fluff #anakin skywalker angst #star wars #star wars x female reader #star wars x reader #star wars smut #sw anakin

[sabictlali]

I mean he’s not lying

#my art #obikin au #obikin #obi wan star wars #obi wan my beloved #obi wan and anakin #obi wan kenobi #anakin angst #sw anakin #anakin skywalker #star wars #star wars clone wars #clone wars #mace windu