#talk of pride

[bellqmione]

wheelchairs and canes and glasses and hearing aids and every single other disability aid should be free btw and if you disagree i hate you

#disability #wheelchair #cane #hearing aids #disability pride #🕸️ #elbow/knee/etc. braces included #contact lenses #and i'm not talking cheap shit #i'm talking FITTED WHEELCHAIRS and HIGH QUALITY HEARING AIDS #and glasses with the perfect prescription #HOW is is that we have to PAY to live fairly

[fella-lovin-fella]

"there are only two sexes, it's literally third grade biology!" and pronouns are taught in kindergarten and you dont seem to understand those either

#lgbt #lgbtq #queer #queer pride #pride #lgbt pride #gay rights #lgbt rights #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #trans #transgender #trans pride #nonbinary #nonbinary pride #intersex #intersex rights #dantes talking again

[canonically47]

“there is no straight explanation for this” neither is there a gay one. there is however an aromantic one

#fandom stuff #fandom talk #fandom takes #aro #aromantic #aromanticism #arospec #aspec #actually aro #actually aromantic #aro pride

[deancaskiss]

rb to have a super gay 2023

#this was a hit last year so lets do it again for 2023 #here’s to being even more gay next year #gonna make 2023 the gayest year yet #also my 2022 post worked for so many people. including me ;) #bex talks #lgbt #lgbtqia #gay #bisexual #lesbian #transgender #asexual #queer #intersex #pansexual #pride #txt #txt post #text post #text

[valleyfthdolls]

You can bend over backwards trying not to be one of “those” cringey queers who wears pride everywhere and goes by arson and has they/it/fluff/pixel/boo pronouns on a catgender pin they wear everywhere and suppress everything “extra” unlikable about your identity and pass as a “normal” cishet and mock everyone who dyes their hair for pride and wears rainbow nail polish and guess what? Conservatives will still want you dead. There is no appeasing them. Stand by your community. Maybe you’ll find that arson (they/it/fluff/pixel/boo) is going to be the best goddamn person to have in your corner when the republicans you’ve given up your life to placate inevitably turn on you and try to sentence you to death because any amount of queer is too damn queer. Maybe you’ll find that we are a community for a reason. We’re all equally degenerate in the eyes in conservatives and equally worthy of joy and life in the eyes of the “weird” queer community you shun.

#onyx talks too much #lgbtq #pride

[teleportzz]

hey guys do the allos know that they can have qprs too? like do they know that being alloromantic doesn't mean they can't choose to be in a qpr anyway? because qprs aren't "romance-lite" for aros, they're an entirely separate kind of relationship that anyone can have. you can do this with fictional characters too. you can put characters that aren't aroace or are even canonically dating in qprs with each other just because you think that would be a cool way to play with their dynamic. it's actually very cool and you totally should.

#i don't think they know this guys #we should tell them #milo talks sometimes #aromantic #arospec #aroace #alloromantic #qpr pride #qpr positivity #qpr stuff #qpr #queerplatonic #queer community #queer #alterous relationship #alterous attraction

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[whetstonefires]

You know what I realize that people underestimate with Pride & Prejudice is the strategic importance of Jane.

Because like, I recently saw Charlotte and Elizabeth contrasted as the former being pragmatic and the latter holding out for a love match, because she's younger and prettier and thinks she can afford it, and that is very much not what's happening.

The Charlotte take is correct, but the Elizabeth is all wrong. Lizzie doesn't insist on a love match. That's serendipitous and rather unexpected. She wants, exactly as Mr. Bennet says, someone she can respect. Contempt won't do. Mr. Bennet puts it in weirdly sexist terms like he's trying to avoid acknowledging what he did to himself by marrying a self-absorbed idiot, but it's still true. That's what Elizabeth is shooting for: a marriage that won't make her unhappy.

She's grown up watching how miserable her parents make one another; she's not willing to sign up for a lifetime of being bitter and lonely in her own home.

I think she is very aware, in refusing Mr. Collins, that it's reasonably unlikely that anyone she actually respects is going to want her, with her few accomplishments and her lack of property. That she is turning down security and the chance keep the house she grew up in, and all she gets in return may be spinsterhood.

But, crucially, she has absolute faith in Jane.

The bit about teaching Jane's daughters to embroider badly? That's a joke, but it's also a serious potential life plan. Jane is the best creature in the world, and a beauty; there's no chance at all she won't get married to someone worthwhile.

(Bingley mucks this up by breaking Jane's heart, but her prospects remain reasonable if their mother would lay off!)

And if Elizabeth can't replicate that feat, then there's also no doubt in her mind that Jane will let her live in her house as a dependent as long as she likes, and never let it be made shameful or awful to be that impoverished spinster aunt. It will be okay never to be married at all, because she has her sister, whom she trusts absolutely to succeed and to protect her.

And if something eventually happens to Jane's family and they can't keep her anymore, she can throw herself upon the mercy of the Gardeners, who have money and like her very much, and are likewise good people. She has a support network--not a perfect or impregnable one, but it exists. It gives her realistic options.

Spinsterhood was a very dangerous choice; there are reasons you would go to considerable lengths not to risk it.

But Elizabeth has Jane, and her pride, and an understanding of what marrying someone who will make you miserable costs.

That's part of the thesis of the book, I would say! Recurring Austen thought. How important it is not to marry someone who will make you, specifically, unhappy.

She would rather be a dependent of people she likes and trusts than of someone she doesn't, even if the latter is formally considered more secure; she would rather live in a happy, reasonable household as an extra than be the mistress of her own home, but that home is full of Mr. Collins and her mother.

This is a calculation she's making consciously! She's not counting on a better marriage coming along. She just feels the most likely bad outcome from refusing Mr. Collins is still much better than the certain outcome of accepting him. Which is being stuck with Mr. Collins forever.

Elizabeth is also being pragmatic. Austen also endorses her choice, for the person she is and the concerns she has. She's just picking different trade-offs than Charlotte.

Elizabeth's flaw is not in her own priorities; she doesn't make a reckless choice and get lucky. But in being unable to accept that Charlotte's are different, and it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with Charlotte.

Because realistically, when your marriage is your whole family and career forever, and you only get to pick the ones that offer themselves to you, when you are legally bound to the status of dependent, you're always going to be making some trade-offs.

😂 Even the unrealistically ideal dream scenario of wealthy handsome clever ethical Mr. Darcy still asks you to undergo personal growth, accommodate someone else's communication style, and eat a little crow.

#hoc est meum #pride and prejudice #elizabeth bennet #charlotte lucas #meta #charlotte is a much less sociable person than lizzie #so avoiding her husband most of the time and not seeking out his company is more viable for her! #she also has more patience for people being wrong #partly i think because she kinds checks out and lets them get on with it which lizzie isn't too great at even with her mother #people have different needs like that's a thing okay #marriage #spinsterhood #pragmatism #like if elizabeth had to listen to collins talk for a few months straight she would be nearly insane with rage #he's not just a low-quality man he's a man designed to be the worst for her specifically #also note that because jane's marriage is elizabeth's fallback plan #darcy screwed her over personally by interfering between her and bingley #she ofc does not bring this up how could she #but it's intensifying the anger during the hunsford rejection i think

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 271

“Grandmother is visiting,” Damian suddenly said with no warning and with his usual not-quite demanding tone. 

“Who?” Tim wasn’t the only one to startle, seeing as Bruce had practically froze, a downturn to his lips in a silent show of confusion. 

Damian scowled. “Are you deaf Drake? Grandmother is coming to Gotham to, quote, make sure I am being properly cared for.” None of them had known that Ras was with anyone actually. At least Tim was pretty sure that would have been in the files. 

“Oh?” Dick didn’t quite crouch to Damian’s height but it was a near thing. “She-” “He,” Damian corrected, interrupting him. They all exchanged a glance before Dick continued. 

“Is he coming to the Manor or…” 

Damian scoffed again, a tiny bit of a flush against his face. “No, Grandmother will most likely be staying with Akhi-”

Now wait one moment-

“YOU HAVE ANOTHER BROTHER?!” 

#DCxDP #DPxDC #Prompts #Deadly Decisions #Danny & Ras are the homoerotic rivals that no one knows if they’re flirting or attempting a murder #It’s actually both they’re just also both Immortal #Danny to Jason: You can become a crime lord if you finish college- you’ve said you wanted to get a degree this is ur chance #Dusan (nodding): Mother has made all of us finish at least our basic education nephew #Why yes this does mean that RH has just made the heads in a duffel bag debut & the bats have no clue it’s Jason #Normally Danny wanders the universe but RAS (affectionately derogatory) HOW DARE U TRY TO HIDE THE GRANDCHILDREN #Morally Gray Danny #He’s well over 300 and that has an affect lol #Also has some fun fae vibes thx to his ghost half & human half finally balancing out #Let Jason & Damian be brothers #Tiny Damian: Akhi look I found a frog :> #Jason (newly not brain damaged & has no clue who this small child is): …. That’s great #Tiny Damian: *GASP* Akhi you can talk now :D #Fuck it- all the Al Ghuls deserve fangs from ecto contamination #Is Danny actually Dusan & Talia’s mother? No one knows and no one wants to ask the probably immortal fae being okay #Danny brought Damian a ghost hound puppy & Jason an original signed Pride & Prejudice book #How come Bruce wasn’t aware of Danyal? Talia forgot to inform him that the mother she was speaking of is in fact still alive #He disappears for a decade sometimes longer she was using past terms how was he supposed to know

[bourneblack]

i’d rather have rainbow capitalism then living in constant fear of discovery. the woman in the pride flag disney t-shirt might be missing the nuance, but at least i know i can be myself. a street full of rainbow flags makes me more comfortable holding a mans hand. look. corporations aren’t your friend. they will sell to whoever will buy. but kids seeing gay everything every year is only ever a good thing, and a massive improvement in history

#unpopular opinion #lgbt #pride month #rainbow capitalism #queer things #bb unpopular opinion #notice how i never said i love capitalism #its the people who buy the flags that are the benefit #notice how i said it makes me more comfortable #and not everyone #because it's not true for everyone #but it's becoming more and more true over time #because despite the fearmongering #things are better than they were #if you can't recognize the fact that we are better off with corporate pride #than with being burned at the stake or being run behind trucks or getting mass fired and murdered and kicked out of home #then you don't need to be on this post #and don't talk to me about how corps and politicians are paying for those behaviors to continue #they've always done that #and now they are digging themselves into a hole #because we call them out and the public listens #the point #is to say there is value to having a seat at the capitialist table #having public opinoin on our side #it means we have more power to call out politicians and corporations for their hypocrisy #it means we have an audience who is listening #so shut the fuck up #trying to explain on this post what rainbow capitalism #the people on this post and I already know #and i'd rather use it

[trans-axolotl]

saw a post the other day that said that psych survivors were overexaggerating and fearmongering for saying that people should be aware that having diagnoses on your record can be a danger + impede your life. and the more i think about it the more annoyed i am. because i think people need to know that there are exceptions to health privacy laws that can make having psych diagnoses and psych hospitalization history on your record risky depending on your circumstances. diagnoses follow you through your health interactions-you do not have to consent to have your information shared between providers. judicial proceedings are also an exception to the HIPAA privacy rule, so for things like custody battles, guardianship, getting orders of protection--the court can petition for medical records. there's so many other situations where even if they can't legally access your information without your authorization, people will require you to disclose diagnoses, records, previous hospitalizations and refuse to give you services/hire you/whatever unless you share that information with them. for example in many states anyone (a provider, a cop, friends and family) can disclose that you have certain psych diagnoses like bipolar to the DMV which then might require that you undergo drivers license review as frequently as every 3 months. my university is actively trying to kick me out right now because i had to disclose my medical record, psych diagnoses, and hospitalization history to them as a requirement to stay enrolled.

and i don't want to scare people or make people think that having a diagnosis on their records is automatically going to mean that it is weaponized against us. because i do know plenty of people who have never faced issues with their records. but i do expect that the community supports the people speaking out about the ways that we have been harmed by diagnoses creating barriers to accessing necessary parts of our life. instead of attacking us or saying that we're lying about things we are currently experiencing.

#personal #antipsych #antipsychiatry #mad pride #mad liberation #saneism #it's just like. i think we need to be realistic! and not deny people who are literally talking about things happening to them #and also allow people who have the option. to make informed choices about seeking diagnosis #bc for many of us that isn't up to us. but if you are considering seeking formal diagnosis. there can absolutley be some good and helpful #things that come from that! im not denying that at all! but there's also some negatives #and i think also like. if people refuse to acknowlege the ways this is structurally a problem #how are we going to make it better so that we don't have to deal with thsi stuff

[arataka-reigen]

👉🏳️‍🌈⁉️🤔

#a pride flag huh...... #namivivi #nefertari vivi #nami #one piece #gi talks animanga #1 #1k #b

[chrissy-kaos]

@void3d-souls this probably won’t help you compose yourself very much... 😈🥵🤤

#Chrissy talks to tags #mutuals #cutuals #tumblr crush #trans #transgender #trans pride #transisbeautiful #mtf #transgirl #mtf hrt #girlslikeus #maletofemale #transformation #😍 #transexual #mtf trans #this is what trans looks like #transsexual #actually trans #transition #m2f transgender #trans community #trans fem #trans experience #trans girl #trans women are beautiful #trans women #trans woman #trans positivity

[canonically47]

“can you people just let friends be friends!!” i shout into the mic. the crowd boos and throws tomatoes at me. “why, are you homophobic?” they accuse. i shoot everyone dead with my aromantic beam.

#fandom stuff #fandom talk #fandom things #fandom takes #aro #arospec #aspec #aromantic #aromanticism #aro pride #actually aro #actually aromantic

[wizardwomenwisdom]

happy pride month to chad and ryan, the lil gay cowboy and roman in the night at the museum trilogy, and every man who played volleyball in top gun (1986).

#yes i know their names are jed and octavius it’s a reference to the seminal pride post #chad and ryan #chad danforth #ryan evans #jedtavius #jedidiah natm #natm octavius #top gun 1986 #goosemav #icemav #iceman #mavrick #pride month #this is what happens when i talk to my mom for too long #i lie about posts existing then make them happen

[fellas-is-it]

got tired of all depressing and hating yourself for being aro vibes on legit any other platform besides tumblr (looking at you tictac app) so wanted to listen to positive aromantic playlists and legit could NOT FIND ANY??????

And the ones that were vaguely positive were made for aroace ppl. Which is great! But im not ace!!! So WHERE'S MY POSITIVE AROALLO REP?!?!?!

Anyways i solved this hyperspecific problem myself and made a POSITIVE AROALLO playlist:

Larger image of the playlist cover i made

#plz i am starved #if anyone has a positive aro playlist SHARE WITH THE CLASS #no hate towards us bonding over our share anger/grief at the world its important and we SHOULD talk about it #but not ALL THE TIME???? #it SHOULDNT be THIS HARD to find good vibe songs for us #ive BEEN thru the hating being aromatic stage I GET IT #but jesus christ we can LIGHTEN UP A LITTLE?? #aro #aromantic #aro problems #aro culture is #aroallo #aromantism #aromatic positivity #aro pride #aro posting #aroallo pride #lgbtq #arospec #aspec #aro discourse #pride #alloaro