#thank GOD im going to the office tomorrow because the shit that just went down… ABSOLUTELY fucking unbearable. i am so tired of this

[pepprs]

tess pepprs current moment in time moodboard

#thank GOD im going to the office tomorrow because the shit that just went down… ABSOLUTELY fucking unbearable. i am so tired of this #purrs #delete later #like i literally do not have a workspace in which it is quiet and clean and comfortable and also in which i can get all my needs met. i am t #the only person in the house who is working for which this is true. pain and suffering and pain and suffering and pain and suffering #i literally don’t think my p*rents are normal. like normal people don’t act like this lol <3 #the sonic and spatial warfare of it all 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

[hrts4hanniehae]

clutch || three

there are written parts :)

note that the timeline or educations may not add up but just ignore it because i don't have the brain power to sync up THIRTEEN + 1 's education schedules

also!!!! the story begins in the christmas period of 2022!!!! IF THERE ARE YEAR ERRORS IM SO SORRY!!!! i legit can't change it omfg

okay if we were being very honest, e/n was an attractive guy. well-liked by everyone, especially yn's parents -- mother. he had a good office job, loved the idea of starting a family and was rather... old-fashioned in his thoughts.

e/n had asked her out 2 years prior. she agreed because she was desperate to please her mother. but it wasn't as if she didn't like him. she did. just... not as much as she would have preferred. he was all those good things, but he didn't let her be free. he always talked her down when she brought up her art or passions. but he made her parents happy. so she suppressed it.

when he cheated on her, she didn't feel any sadness. not much resentment either. but when he stole her apartment from her, she lost her shit.

"what do you mean i can't take my apartment back? MY NAME IS ON THE LEASE!!"

"i did not sign that! that's a forged signature! how many times do i have to tell you, i have no recollection of EVER signing my apartment off to him! god why won't you even investigate the signature!"

not only did she have to deal with this bastard's theft, but now she had to deal with him at work too.

"do you know where's the bathroom?" (random museum goer)

she kindly pointed her in the direction of the nearest bathroom.

"oh yn! I didn't know you worked here." - e/n

"hi e/n. what do you need. and where's your side chick." - yn

"she went to the bathroom. i wanted to see you." - e/n

"when the fuck are you going to leave me alone? you already stole my house. what else do you want?" - yn

"yn, you're being ridiculous. just come back to me. i'll ditch her for you. i just wanted to try someone new. you're not exactly a... fun partner you know? fun in that way." - e/n

"leave me alone. i already have a new apartment. just please. i don't fucking like you anymore. just leave me alone. stop harassing me, okay? your idiotic excuses and reasonings don't make ANY sense at all. just go." - yn

"so why haven't you told your mom about our breakup? hm? do you really not like me anymore?" - e/n

"i've told you time and time again. i don't talk to my mother. at all. if you care so much, just tell her yourself. why we broke up. hm? or do you want me to get byeongho to tell her. because I will. i'm not telling her because i'm trying to help you save face. if i tell her, your father will know. and he will not be happy. i'm trying to do one nice thing for you despite you fucking another girl in OUR BED." - yn

and just like a saviour, minghao was running up to her.

"yn, your boss told me to look for you about managing my exhibit. oh. hi e/n. get lost, thanks." - minghao

"mind your own business, [redacted slur]" - e/n

security kicks him out.

"thanks, hao. my day has been ruined because of him." - yn

"i'll buy you lunch? i don't think you've had lunch yet." - minghao

"thanks but i'm good. i don't usually have lunch anyways. i'm going to head home. my shift is over." - yn

"did wonwoo tell you our friend was staying over at your place today?" - minghao

"huh. who? he didn't tell me." - yn

i guess he forgot - minghao

"lee chan, or dino. the soloist. so don't be too shocked if you see him walking around." - minghao

"right. i'll see you tomorrow for lunch, minghao. go hang out with jun." - yn

"he's filming a movie right now. how am i supposed to go see him?" - minghao

"figure it out!" - yn

she forgot about dino and walked into the bathroom not knowing he would be there. luckily, he was half-clothed.

ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

synopsis: wonwoo is a popular streamer known for his incredible gaming skills and good looks. He turned heads. but he hates the attention. he just wants to play games and earn money. one day he receives a letter. his apartment’s rent has almost doubled. no warnings at all. his current paycheck from streaming can’t shoulder those bills. he has no choice but to rent out his spare room. to who? a fresh art university graduate who has… 1. a stable job ✅ 2. talent for art and sculpting ✅ 3. many friends ❌ 4. social anxiety ✅ 5. no filter ✅ when his iconic cat logo gets copystriked, she comes to the rescue with a new logo for him. when his apartment’s walls start peeling, she fixes it. whatever he used to struggle with… the empty space... was now filled by her. so what does he *last player standing* do when her ex *enemy spotted* tries to take her back? heh. *clutch* he clutches.

inspired by wonwoo's gam3bo1 streams, falling into your smile & gogo squid (has hints of valorant)

pairing: streamer!jeon wonwoo x fem!artist!reader (ft. jeongcheol, soonhoon, junhao, seoksoo, verkwan)

genre: fluff, comfort, slowburn, comfort, pining, bestfriend!minghao

warnings: stalker ex, toxic ex, mentions of abuse, guns (game), cursing, hate comments, panic attacks

started: 28.12.23

ended: ?

taglist: join from my masterlist

main masterlist

smau socials

previous I next

tags! @fairyofhour @megseungmin @sun-daddy-yoriichi @woozixo @euphoric-univers @christinewithluv @haowonbins @ocyeanicc @asyre @cynthiaaax13 @superhoshisvt @bangantokchy @chimmy-bts @angelarin @daisawa @writingbarnes @jeonghansshitester

@belladaises @wonwootakemyheart @wonwooz1 @luchiet @kookssecret @caratsland @peachescreamandcrumble @thepoopdokyeomtouched @isabellah29 @leah-rose03 @yandere-stories @coupshour @heesbees

#caratsland #wonwoo #wonwoo x reader #jeon wonwoo #wonwoo smau #seventeen headcanons #wonwoo fluff #seventeen imagines #svt fluff #wonwoo scenarios #svt x reader #dino x reader #dk x reader #hoshi x reader #jeonghan x reader #joshua x reader #jun x reader #svt #svt masterlist #svt smau #jeongcheol #seoksoo #soonhoon #verkwan #junhao #gameboy #kpop #masterlist #about me #biaslist

[nque02]

While I’m in the mood to lay shit bare, ig I’ll get this off my chest.

I’m calling it now, I am going to work myself to death. Just a slow inevitable decline of my health, patience, and my sanity. I keep feeling sudden sharp pains in my side, I get random pains in my bones, back, knees. Sometimes my chest just hurts for no reason. Im not even 21, I can’t buy a drop of liquor and I have back pain. The worst part is that I wouldn’t be the first in my family to die from overworking themself if it were to happen.

My father is working himself to the bone, even now on his vacation. I’m gonna go fishing with him tomorrow, but he isn’t healthy. He has no energy, he eats a lot of crappy food, energy drinks, etc. His wife(my stepmom) doesn’t help, she’s insistent that she will get on disability for her mental illness(even though she was able to hold down several jobs in the past) and is making him support her and my autistic brother.

My mother literally died from working too much. Mother of 3 and a single income household. She had no time to sit down and decompress. She would come home, eat something, watch some YouTube, go to bed and wake up for work 5 hours later. She was a saint, she was way to patient and forgiving. My two sisters lived with her, and they let the apartment fall to shit. I can’t blame Autumn, she was 16 and was way too overwhelmed to make any progress. Maddy however. She was a 23 year old, grown women, living in her mothers house rent free. Refused to help clean, barely left her room. Did fuck all to help mom. I know she regrets it but I’ll never forgive her. Mom passed away from undiagnosed diabetes. She barely had enough money to pay the bills, let alone any medical bills. She just ignored her failing health, and kept pushing to support her children. God I miss calling her and listening to her talk. No matter what if she was awake she was happy to talk. We would drive for hours just talking about work, life, just. Anything. I was planning on moving back in with her so I could help get everything under control. Maybe if I took the lead and cleaned the apartment, Maddy and Autumn would help. Mom could relax, and I could help pay her bills so she wouldn’t have to worry so much. She passed away two weeks before my planned move in date. Her heart gave out while she was asleep. I found her laying there. She was resting her head on her arm, she clearly fell asleep, but something was wrong. You could tell by looking at her. I went up to her to try and wake her up, but one touch of the arm and…

Well she was cold. I called 911, they told me to lay her on the ground and to start performing CPR. The ground. God was it a mess, not a clear spot to be found. I couldn’t just lay my mom down in filth, random objects stabbing her back. So I quickly cleaned the area I’d lay her down despite what the operator said, and got to performing CPR.

I could slowly feel the warmth coming back to her as I did it. Her lips were slightly blue when I started, but by the time the paramedics got there they looked healthy and I thought there was a chance she’d be alright. That she’d wake up, and insist that she was fine. The officers who came with the paramedics got my dog from my bedroom, and thank god they did because about a minute later they told me she was gone and that there was nothing they could do. God bless that beautiful dog, he was there when I needed him. Normally he’s a little hellhound that refuses to behave, but he knew something was wrong. He just let me hold him while I cried on our stairwell. After that I tried calling my older sister, but she didn’t pick up. It was Halloween at 2 am after all, the night before she got drunk with her friends and was asleep at that moment. I called my aunt, and let her know mom passed away. She immediately got out of bed, got dressed, and was on her way. I also told my dad, and he did the same. He got Maddy from her friends and came to moms to pick me up. One thing your never prepared for is to see the man, the pillar in your life shaking. Not out of anger or frustration, because… well I don’t even know. I don’t think he knows. They were divorced nearly as long as I had been alive, but he was shaking when I hugged him.

I’m scared he’s gonna work himself to death like mom did, and I’m worried I’m going to do the same. It’s what we have to do to survive after all in this hell scape.

Anyways anyone who reads this. I’m sorry you found your way to my trauma dump. I can’t afford a therapist, and the next best thing is to scream into the void at random strangers

#trauma dump #vent blog #personal vent #cw vent

[simonsrosebud]

maybe 3, 16, or 18 on the angst ones??? im in a mood

NOT CANON IN THE KALTON AU

it’s may when dalton breaks up with kevin.

it’s right before their practice of the year when kevin catches dalton’s call.  he stops in the hall on the way to the lounge to answer it.  “hey, what’s up?  i’m about to go change out, but want me to come around after?”

“um, i think, maybe, it’s better if you don’t, kevin.”

and he frowns.  “why, what’s wrong?  are you okay?”

“i just, i’m going through some things right now, and i just think it’s better if i were to do it alone.”

“oh... well, you know i’m always here.  just call me later?”

“kevin...”

kevin’s heart starts beating faster.  “yeah?”

“i don’t just mean alone for a day.”

kevin leans back against the wall.  “what... what do you mean?”  he whispers.

“i mean alone as in, um... without a boyfriend.”

no.  “dalton, whatever it is, i-i’ll do better, i promise.”

dan is the only other person at the stadium yet, and stops in the doorway to the girls locker room when she hears the conversation.  she doesn’t want to pry, but if she’s right, and what’s about to happen really happens then she doesn’t want to leave kevin here alone.

“i’m sorry, kevin-“

“no, hey, please-“

“i-i gotta go.”

“dalton, please!”  but the line is already dead, and kevin doesn’t mean to, but he drops his phone in the process of turning and pressing his forehead against the wall.

he tries holding everything in, but he can feel himself starting to panic, and when dan turns him around with a gentle “it’s okay” he nearly crumples because it’s not okay.  he doesn’t know what’s going on.

dan drives him over to dalton’s apartment, and thank god kevin has a key, but when he gets inside it’s still and quiet.  and the coffee maker is gone and the closet is open and near empty.  the chargers next to the bed are gone and that’s when kevin drops to his knees and presses his hands to the floor because dalton up and left for the summer without warning.

he’s gone, and kevin can’t do anything about it. 

he lets out a sob, followed by heavy breathing and a weight so deep in his chest that he can’t get up.  his hands are shaking over his mouth, and his vision is blurry before he squeezes his eyes shut.

he takes a deep breath, but his exhale is a sob, and he leans forward with his arms around his stomach.

he can’t breathe.

dan comes to find him a few minutes later, and when she tries putting her arms around him he sounds like he’s in pain.  she pulls him upright to lean on her instead.  he clings like his life depends on it, hands clenched in the back of her t-shirt.

when she gets him up enough to get him back to the suite, she makes him promise he’ll be okay before making it to the stadium.  she’s a little bit late for practice, and by the time she gets onto the court neil already started.  it’s supposed to be a captains practice, so she gives him credit for taking over as vice captain.

“where’s kevin?”

“last minute appointment with betsy.”

neil nods.  he knows better than to want to ask.

dan checks the time every ten minutes it feels.  she needs this to be over.

meanwhile, kevin’s lying on the sofa, staring at the ceiling.  a weight back in his chest and tears silently crawling from his eyes.

he just wants to feel numb.

he looks to the kitchen.

kevin drinks.  he drinks so much that he throws up.

he wants to be numb, but it’s not working.  which is why he drinks some more.

wymack comes by at the end of practice and calls dan over after watching everyone shuffle out.  “kevin?”

she hesitates.  “um, dalton broke up with him right before practice, and up and left for the summer before we could get to his place.  he-he was a mess, coach, he could barely function.  probably on the verge of a panic attack.”

and that peeks his attention in a different way that the first thing did, because he curses under his breath and turns.  “you left him alone?  at the tower?”  she nods, and he curses again.  “come on, fast, danielle!”  she doesn’t usually see coach running for no reason, which makes her high tail it to his car.

wymaca rambles a bit on the way there.  “every time i’ve seen that kid have a meltdown without dalton to rely on it was before they were together, and it always ended with alcohol.”  his fingers tapped on the wheel.  “i don’t fucking care if he breaks sobriety so long as he’s not dying of fucking alcohol poisoning right now.  i know him.  i know how much he loves that fucking kid.  he can not be alone right now.”

and dan can’t tell if he’s seething or worried out of his mind, or both.  but either way, she hasn’t seen him like this since neil went missing and kevin told them it probably wasn’t an accident.

womack has keys to all of their suite’s for emergencies, but kevin’s door is open.  andrew and neil were straight on their way to columbia from practice, so he’s the only one there.

wymack bursts in, and kevin’s drunk out of his mind sitting on the floor against the cabinets.  he shakes his head when he sees his father, and stands.  dan doesn’t think he could make it across the room if he tried.

“m’fine, m’fine!” he leans back against the counter.  “s’probably my fault, anyway.”

he reaches for a bottle of vodka on the counter, and when wymack beats him to it he tries grabbing it.  “come on.”

“no-“

“please!  dan, i-“

“no, kevin!”  wymack is holding him back, a hand on his chest and the other around him to try and keep him still as he pushes against wymack.

“just don’t wanna feel!”  kevin cries out.  he goes limp against wymack and starts to crumble.  “hurts so bad, i just- i just wanna be numb from it all.”  his voice is weak, and he sinks to the ground.  he covers an arm around his face.  “please just take it away.”  he begs.  “please, please, help.  i-i can’t, i can’t,” he sobs.  dan drops beside him and pulls his head to her shoulder.  “i love him so much,” he whispers.  “i dunno what to do.”

she casts a pleading look to wymack, because all she knows to do is rub his back and try to shush him to calm down.

“hey, look at me.”  wymack takes kevin’s chin, gently.  dan backs off.  “this is going to suck.  but you’re going to get up tomorrow, and you’re going to call him up and demand an explanation.  i don’t care if you have to fly to his house, dammit, you’ll do it.  because after your mother left there wasn’t a day i didn’t regret not going after her, okay?  cause look what she left me, kevin.”  he raises an eyebrow.  “you.”  he sticks a finger to kevin’s chest.

kevin nods.  “i want him so bad.”

“then you’ll go after him.  whether it works out or not.”

kevin sleeps on wymack’s sofa that night.

and in the morning, he’s woken up by knocking on the door.

kevin’s head is pounding, but he already threw up everything he could last night.

he trudges to the door, but the person behind it makes him take a step back.  he wants to jump forward and hug him, but it hurts him too much to actually want to go through with it.

“what are you doing here,” he whispers.  he crosses his arms.  he probably smells like alcohol and vomit.

dalton looks desperate, and he falters on what he wants to say, so kevin jumps in again.  “can i just… can you just tell me what i did wrong?”  he bites the inside of his cheek.  he knows it’ll be easy getting him emotional what with just waking up.  “i know i’ve got baggage, but just-just tell me why.  cause i just woke up and i’m all torn up and hungover, so i-i just need to know.  please.”

dalton frowns.  “i… you promised you’d stop drinking-“

“and you promised you wouldn’t hurt me!”  kevin’s voice cracks.  “any other lies left to tell me?”  and he takes a deep breath.  “please, dalton, i just need to know why you’d fucking do this to me!”  he messily wipes his eye with the cuff of his sleeve.

“you left without explanation, and-and i… i feel like i’m always going through something, but you’re the reason i’ve come out just fine!  i just wanna be that for you, but instead you thought breaking up would be the better option?  how-how do you think that makes me feel?  to think that my boyfriend doesn’t think i can comfort him?  that he’d rather be a-alone?”  he’s starting to get worked up, and wipes his eyes again.  he takes a deep breathe.

dalton has tears in his eyes.  “i’m sorry,” he whispers.  “i’m so, so, sorry.  that wasn’t… i didn’t mean that.  that’s not what i think, i didn’t mean to leave you thinking that.  and,” he looks away for a second.  “can i just explain?  from the beginning?  i-i want you, i don’t wanna ruin this, and i hope i haven’t already.”

you haven’t.  i just want you.

but kevin lets him in.  he doesn’t sit, but he at least lets him inside and closes the door.  he’s sure his father is hiding out in his office or bedroom.  he’s a light sleeper, and they weren’t exactly being quiet.

dalton starts.  “um, my grandmother died yesterday morning, and my grandfather was admitted to the hospital almost right after, and-and my family doesn’t know why,” he says.  “and i was a mess, but i knew you had practice- i would’ve gone home right away regardless, but i-i didn’t wanna put all my family problems on you, cause you’ve already got enough.  but, i, um, i was almost to maryland and i wanted- i knew i had to turn around, cause i was a fucking asshole, but it was already late and i probably would’ve fallen asleep at the wheel, so i stopped home to sleep for a few hours and now…”  he meets kevin’s eyes again.

“i just can’t lose you, and i was stupid and a dick, and you don’t deserve to be treated like this.  kevin please, i’m… i’m so sorry.”  kevin notices how dalton holds back on reaching out to him.  “is there any way i can fix it?”

kevin looks to the side, arms crossed.  “you’ve probably dealt with so much fucked shit with me and my family,” my foxes, “family problems don’t scare me, d. i love you so much that i sat on my knees in your apartment having a panic attack… i… i don’t wanna do the whole thing where i take a few days away from you,” he says.  “i can be there for you like you’ve done for me, i swear, but you just, like, you have to talk to me. cause i can’t do that again.  so many things went through my head that i can’t go through again.  i-i can’t be left so broken that it makes me wanna be numb enough to drink.”

this time, he lets dalton wipe a tear under his eye.  he speaks quiet.  “i’m humiliated by that.  i never want to break my sobriety again.”

dalton nods.  “i’m so sorry i broke my promise.”

“mine too.”

“no.”  he shakes his head.  “that’s different.  and i should’ve talked to you, told you why i did what i did, even if it was stupid.”

kevin nods.  “can you hold me?” he whispers.

dalton doesn’t waste time, and wraps his arms around kevin, who sinks into his embrace.  “i’ll make you a new promise.  one i can keep.”  dalton speaks into kevin’s hair.  “i promise to communicate better and talk to you, no matter what.”

kevin slides his arms around dalton’s neck.  “i promise i’ll call someone if i ever get the urge to drink alone again.”  and then, “i’m sorry about your grandmother.”  he knows which one it is, too, because his grandmother on his mother’s side passed when dalton was a child.  this one kevin met a few months back, even.

he pulls back, and cups dalton’s face.  “i’m here for you, okay?”

dalton nods, and he tilts his head into kevin’s hand.  “i don’t think it’ll hit me for a while.  the funeral is in three days.”  he pauses.  “you don’t have to, but-“

“i’ll be there with you.”

dalton cups his hand around kevin’s on his face and brings his knuckles to his lips.  “i’ll make all of this up to you.”  kevin kisses his forehead.  “i love you,” dalton whispers.

i’m now realizing i forgot to include angst #16 aka “you’ve changed” but it’s probably better for my own sanity that i didn't bc that one just makes me think of “they break up and run into each other months/years later” which i can NOT do to my boys LOL

#kevin day #bisexual kevin day #the one where someone doesn’t know who kevin day is #OC: dalton miller #dalton miller #kevin day x dalton miller #exy #aftg #all for the game #the foxhole court #the foxes #palmetto state university #palmetto state foxes #dan wilds #andrew minyard #neil josten #david wymack #kayleigh day

[yikesharringrove]

I both really want to read a conversion camp fic and really fucking DONT lol but I trust you to do it well and not absolutely destroy us so... I am asking for you to write the conversion camp fic please.

Oh, my plan is to absolutely destroy you all with this one.

This is modern bc it wasn’t gonna be but then I wrote a part and it kinda had to be lol

TW: religion, homophobia, transphobia (nd Steve), conversion camp, anxiety, depression, physical abuse, the word r*pe is thrown around, suicidal ideations, basically, it’s a DOOZY

Seriously, this shit gets DARK. I have A LOT of untapped emotions.

But it has a happy ending, don’t worry

-

Steve’s hands were shaking as they dug through his bag.

They had already pulled out the eyeshadow palette he had tried to sneak in, needed something to make himself feel okay in this inevitable Hell.

“Did you receive our guidelines?” They had found the lipstick he had shoved in one of his shoes. “We specifically outlined prohibited items.” He took a shaky breath. “Your perversion is much deeper than anticipated, Mr. Harrington.” He just nodded.

He was shuffled about, led to a cold blank room.

His first meeting with a conversion specialist.

“What is your infatuation with women’s things?” The man’s voice made Steve feel like there was cold water dripping down his back.

“I just like pretty things.”

“Why do you deny your manhood?”

“I don’t.”

“You say that, but you do. Every time you pretend you’re a woman-”

“I don’t pretend I’m a woman. I just like makeup and stuff.” He gave Steve a disgusted look.

“By denying your true self, you have turned your back on God. You have allowed the devil to infiltrate your soul, to convince you that these perversions are okay.” He looked down at the paper in his lap, the forms Steve had been forced to sit and fill out with his parents. “You were not close with your father, were you?”

“Um, no. Not really.”

“So you pushed away your male role model?”

“He pushed me away, more like.” The man pursed his lips.

“A father does not push away his son unless there is something evil within him. A father can always tell when there is something wrong, something disgusting in his offspring.” He stood up, towering over Steve.

“You are disgusting, Steven Harrington. You are perverse and foul. You turn your back on your Creator. But you are not without a savior. You can be saved. Denounce the devil that tempts you to this life. Follow your savior, and He will lead you to safety.” He held out his hand. Steve took a breath, and shook it.

-

Steve’s first day was a fucking nightmare.

He was led to his room, a small room with two bunked beds and no doors. He was told he’d have three roommates, and if they were caught touching one another, the punishment would be painful.

And then it was group therapy.

He sat in a circle with ten of the other boys from the program. They were forced to discuss every attraction they had ever felt to anyone besides women. They were forced to discuss sexual encounters they had had with men, and call themselves disgusting.

And as it was Steve’s turn, and he talked about wearing panties, and fingering himself, and sucking Tommy’s dick, and he felt disgusting.

At dinner he met one of his roommates, and his heart sank.

“Where’d they scrape you up?” The guy was fucking gorgeous.

“Indiana.”

“And you just a homo? Or...?” The guy’s voice trailed off as he looked Steve up and down. “You one a’ them crossdressers, too?” Steve flushed deeply.

“How, how did you know?”

“Because you look like they got to you already. Means they got something on you. Make you feel real bad about yourself.”

“How, how long have you been here?”

“Long enough. Seen plenty a’ boys come and go. Some cured, some just a lost cause.” He was so nonchalant about the whole thing.

“Why, why so long?” He grinned at Steve, sharp and beautiful.

“Because I’m immune, Pretty Boy.” Steve’s breath hitched. The guy licked over his teeth. “Can’t beat the gay outta me if they tried. And they fuckin’ have.”

“But why, why don’t you want to change? I mean, they’re, they’re right.” His blue eyes went cold.

“They got you deep. Damn, you might be the quickest turn around I’ve ever seen.”

“I just, I don’t want to be wrong anymore.” He leaned closer to Steve.

“You have never been wrong.” Steve felt like he was gonna cry.

A firm hand clapped down on Steve’s shoulder.

“William, I hope you’re treating our new guest nicely.” William’s face fell immediately.

“Yes, Father.” Steve looked up to see a priest holding onto him. His hair was greying and neat. His eyes were cold and dead.

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to take Steven with me.” Steve followed him, eyes downcast, all the way to his office. “Steven, my name is Father Andrew. I’m here to help you.” Steve didn’t like his smile. “We’re going to meet everyday at 8:30 pm for your therapy.”

He pulled out a folder from the bottom drawer of his desk. He placed a photograph in front of Steve with a flourish.

It was porn.

It was fucking gay porn.

He stood in front of Steve, leaning against the desk, off to the side of the image.

“Tell me what you see here.” One of the men had dark hair. He was being taken from behind by the other man, his blond hair and bright eyes stirred something in Steve.

“Two men. Having sex.”

He didn’t see Father Andrew’s hand, just heard the crack of it against his cheek.

His eyes watered, his cheek burned.

“What do you see?”

“Two perverts.”

“What are they doing?”

“Defiling one another.”

“Good, Steven. You’re learning.”

He placed another photograph down. This time, the man being fucked had a full face of makeup, tears making the dark eyeliner run as he was on his back, hands cuffed to the bed. The man fucking him was smirking at the camera, tongue between his teeth.

“How does this make you feel?”

“Disgusted.”

“Why?”

“That they, they would touch each other like that.”

“Do you have fantasies like this? Of being tied up by another man? Raped by another man?”

And the answer, the answer was technically yes. He had plenty of fantasies of being tied up, taken rough, taken dirty.

But rape. That’s a strong fucking word.

“No, Father.” Another crack. Another slap.

“Lying is a sin, Steven.”

“I, I don’t want to be, to be raped.” Another slap.

“Lying is a sin, Steven.”

“Yes, yes Father. I have had fantasies.”

“These are not fantasies, these are perversions planted in your mind by demons, by the devil trying to pull you away from Christ our Lord. Do not let these demons lead you astray.”

He pulled out another picture.

Steve’s heart fucking stopped.

It was a picture of himself. A nude he had taken for Tommy.

He was wearing pretty lingerie, pouting to the camera. He remembers taking it, remembers putting on his makeup, posing over and over until he took one he liked. They must’ve gone through his phone, through his texts.

“Why do you dress like a woman?”

“Be-because I’m disgusting.” And the thing is, Steve had been told plenty of times that day that he’s disgusting, and he had begun to believe it.

“Good, Steven. You are disgusting. Do you believe you’re a woman?”

“No, Father.”

“Then why have you been experimenting with women’s things?”

“I believed I wasn’t a man.”

“And are you a man?”

“Yes, Father.”

“God made you a man.”

“Yes, Father.” Steve still didn’t like his smile.

He switched the image.

And it was another one of his nudes. This time he was in a skirt, kneeling with his back to the mirror, one hand spreading his cheeks, showing off the silver plug in his ass.

He even remembers the text he had sent with it.

Tommy had been studying for a test, so Steve sent that picture and said but im lonely :( and Tommy had replied I’ll be there in twenty.

“Why do you have an obsession with your anus?” Steve could feel the blood drain from his face.

“I, uh, it feels good.” Another slap.

“How does spitting in the face of your Heavenly Father feel good, Steven? Sodomy does not feel good.” Another slap. Steve’s face felt like it was on fire.

“I’m sorry, Father. I am vile, and disgusting.” Steve was sobbing, felt so fucking pathetic, trying to look anywhere but the printed image of himself.

“I think that’s enough for tonight. I expect you here tomorrow after dinner.”

Steve fucking ran back to his room.

The other boys were asleep. He climbed into the top bunk, curling into himself.

He felt disgusting, he felt foul and wrong and bad.

He tried to stifle his sobs into his pillow, the scratchy case muffling his panic attack.

“Hey, Stevie.”

“I’m sorry. I’ll try to be quiet.” There was a sigh, breath fanning over his face.

And then the boy from earlier was swinging himself into bed with him, curling against him.

“They said-”

“I know exactly what times they patrol. I’ll leave your bed before then.” He sighed. “First night’s always the hardest. You just gotta get through. Tell them what they wanna hear, but remember that they’re fucking wrong. You are valid, and real. Being gay is not disgusting.”

Steve curled into him, letting himself be comforted.

“Thank you. Thank you, William.”

“Oh, Christ. Call me Billy.”

“Thank you, Billy.”

-

As time passed, it was easy to retreat into himself.

He met with Father Andrew every night, got slapped and hit when his answers weren’t condemning enough.

But each night, Billy would crawl into bed with him, would hold him when he broke down.

The kiss was inevitable.

It happened after Steve had an extreme day, the beating he received when he had admitted to being nonbinary, that he had asked his friends at home to use other pronouns.

And Billy had said you’re perfect the way you are, Sweet Thing.

And Steve kissed him.

And Steve wanted to die.

-

“Forgive me, Father. For I have sinned.” Steve took a shaking breath.

He was kneeling in the small confessional.

They had Mass every three days, and confession each Friday.

“It has been one week since my last confession.” He took a deep breath. He needed to get this of his chest, needed to get the punishment he deserved. “Father, I, the feelings have not gone away. There is, there’s a boy, and I, I love him. And I try not to. I try not to look at him, to remember the devil is leading me astray. But Father, I think about him. I think about him often.”

“This is an extremely grievous sin, my son.”

“I know, Father. Please help me. I want to, I want to be pure. To be free of this sin, this temptation.”

“I offer, as penance for your sins, to pray a rosary for each time you have had an evil thought about your fellow man this week. As you ponder the Mysteries of the rosary, consider how God created you, how Jesus died for you, and you wipe your feet on their love.”

“Yes, Father.”

“And our meeting will be arduous tonight, Steven.”

“Yes, Father.”

“Now please, recite the Act of Contrition.”

Steve’s hands shook as he recited the prayer, finishing his confession with Father Andrew.

-

“Now, Steven. You discussed having impure thoughts today.”

Steve’s knees ached from praying the rosary so many times earlier today. He hadn’t eaten, had gone straight to the Chapel after his confession.

He wanted to pray, to cleanse himself.

And he didn’t want to risk seeing Billy.

“Yes, Father.”

“And you mentioned that you love another boy.”

“The devil is trying to make me think it’s love.” Father Andrew smiled his empty smile down at Steve.

“That’s right Steven. Because love cannot exist between two men. Love is a beautiful thing created and given to us by The Lord God.” Father Andrew leaned over Steve, made him shrink back in his seat. “Which is why you are unlovable as you are. You are foul and vile. You may be loved if you change.”

He grabbed Steve’s hair, holding his head still as he slapped his face.

And Steve let him.

He was foul, he was vile.

He deserved the pain.

-

Two months.

That’s how long it took Steve to “graduate”.

He left the facility in clean khakis, a nice sweater his mother had sent him to wear home.

Billy had left a week and a half prior.

He was deemed a lost cause.

Steve’s mother was there to pick him up, hugged him tight and told him how happy she was that he was fixed.

He was quiet as they drove, watching the shadows the summer sun cast on the side of the plain flat road.

“Your father will be pleased. You’ve made such wonderful progress. Free of all those delusions.”

They passed Tommy’s house.

He felt sick.

-

The first thing Steve did when he got home was destroy all his make up.

He took everything feminine from it’s hiding spot in the back of his closet.

He scraped out the eye shadow, smeared the lipstick all over his dresses.

He cut up his lingerie, shoved everything into a black garbage back, driving into town to toss it in the dumpster behind the gas station.

He wanted it away, he wanted it gone. He wanted to be pure.

-

His hands shook as he zipped up the suitcase.

He didn’t have much in there, was planning on taking enough to get him through a little while, then maybe buying some things, some pretty things.

His parents were asleep downstairs, he was planning on being long gone by the time they woke up.

He put on his backpack, taking his wallet and tiptoeing down the stairs, his shoes in his hand.

He had a plan, would drive to the bus station, leave his car there.

Someone will find it, and at that point, he’ll be long gone.

He bought a bus ticket to Chicago, paid in cash and gave a fake name.

He was fucking out of here.

They were fucking out of here.

-

“As I live, and fucking breathe.”

Steve startled as a hand came down on their shoulder.

They startled again when they turned around, came face to face with a ghost from the past.

“B-Billy?” Billy’s hair was longer than it had been at the camp. His smile was lazier, his eyes brighter. Steve’s gut gave an excited little flutter as he looked them up and down.

“You look fuckin’ gorgeous, Pretty Boy.” Steve flushed, adjusting their dress. It was new.

It had been three years since the camp. One year of Steve living in pain, until they packed their shit, and moved to the Golden Coast. They left in the middle of the fucking night, ran away like a scared child, never looking back.

And here was the love of their goddamn life, in some hole in the wall coffee shop in San Fransisco.

“It’s uh, it’s not Pretty Boy, anymore.” Billy’s grin got even wider.

“Thank fuck.” He swung himself into the seat across from Steve’s, upsetting some of the papers they were working on.

“What happened to you, Billy?” Billy’s smiled slipped, just a little.

“My dad was tired a’ paying for that joint if I wasn’t getting better. So he said if I wasn’t fixed in like, a month, he would stop paying, and I would be kicked out. Stayed true to his word. Haven’t seen the bastard since.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. Getting kicked outta that place is the best fuckin’ thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“I graduated. Went through the whole thing. Took me a year to realize how fucked up it was.”

“Jesus. They got you deep.” Steve shrugged.

“I’m okay now.”

“Yeah? What’re you doin’?”

“Goin’ to school. Gonna be a counselor. Hopefully work in an elementary school, or something.” Billy’s eyes were bright.

“That’s amazing. Gonna tell all the little queer kids that they’re valid and all that?”

“That’s the goal.” Billy grinned. “What are you doing now? You with anyone?”

“I own a bar, actually. Kind of a dive, but it’s a good time.” He looked at Steve through his lashes. “You should come by, sometime. Be good to see you.”

“I’d like to see you too.”

“And to answer your question, I’m not with anyone. Not right now.” He smirked. “But I could be.” He leaned over the table, drawing one finger down Steve’s hand. “I like seeing you happy. Feel like I only ever saw you cryin’ in that joint.”

“Well, spent a lot of time crying there.”

“For good reason.” Billy took their hand. “It’s really good to see you.”

“Y’know I told Father Andrew I was in love with you. Got beat black and fuckin’ blue for it.” Billy’s face was grave.

“Why’d you do that?”

“Wanted to be fixed. Took me a year to realize I didn’t need that.”

“You stop lovin’ me in that year?”

“Not even in the two after that.” Billy took a shaking breath.

“You know, I uh, I love you too. Always did. It broke my fucking heart to leave you in that place. Was gonna wake you up that night, get you to run away with me. But they took me out, uh, forcibly.”

“Bet you put up a real good fight.”

“Broke Father Ryan’s nose.” Steve let out a burst of laughter, clapping one hand over their mouth.

“I was wondering about that. He had a splint for like, a month.”

“Yeah, well, bastard kept tryin’ to exorcise me. Headbutted him right in the face.”

“Good for you, Bill. Sometimes I wish I could light the whole place on fire.”

“Me too.” Billy took their hand, pressing a kiss to the back of it. “I gotta head, but I wanna see you. Soon. Later today, if you can.”

“Yeah, uh, I’m just doing some homework, but I could stop by the bar tonight? I don’t have shit to do tomorrow.”

“Lemme pick you up. We can go to dinner before I take you to the bar.” They smiled softly at him.

“I’d like that.”

#oof #this was a lot to write #i got halfway through and realized how much damn Truama the Church has given me #big yikes #I've been really fucking scarred by TWO religions #how fun #yikes writes #tw homophobia #tw religion #tw conversion #tw gay conversion #steve harrington #billy hargrove #steve harrington x billy hargrove #billy hargrove x steve harrington #harringrove #harringrove fic #harringrove ficlet #harringrove drabble

[kiegosbby]

hawks x f!reader

chapter 8 I think. I’m sorry guys itll get better I promiseeee

word count: 1.6k

warnings: drinking, and just making poor decisions

✁- - - - - - r- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

when you finished your work you left quickly trying to avoid talking to him any further.

You stopped at a liquor store. This wasn't your best idea. But In the moment, you needed it badly.

you never really drank before, not knowing what to buy so you bought vodka. People drink that straight right?

she bought her bottle and put it in a paper bag, having to keep her hero appearance.

she flew home and sat down on her couch. She popped the cap off and chugged it. It burned as it went down. She thought it would be worse it tasted like medicine. Kind of.

She looked across the room and saw her phone. She was now slightly tipsy, she stood up and walked over to her phone. Picking it up it was slightly cracked but it still worked. You turned it on and while you waited, chugged some more because why the hell not?

as your phone turned on you saw all the messages hawks had left you.

10+ plus new messages from: Birdy ❤️🐔

"Tch.."

Birdy ❤️🐔

Hey baby bird I'm sorry about last night I probably seem like a dick.

Birdy ❤️🐔

I had to help endeavour on a case and I couldn't say no. Please let me make it up to you

Birdy ❤️🐔

I still owe you ice cream even if you don't wanna go out anymore

Birdy ❤️🐔

Don't forget that you have to come to my agency tomorrow and fill out some paperwork and set your office up

Birdy ❤️🐔

Angel where are you? Your 10 minutes late

Birdy ❤️🐔

Angel I'm starting to worry it's been a hour. Please just let me know that your ok

Birdy ❤️🐔

Y/n please text me. Im worried and I swear if anything happened to you I'll kill someone

Birdy ❤️🐔

Don't make me go to your apartment. I will don't test me.

Birdy ❤️🐔

angel please reply

Birdy ❤️🐔

Angel? Please..

Birdy ❤️🐔

I'm about to go to your apartment. I don't know which numbers yours but I'll go through the whole building if I have to.

well now you felt like a bitch.

It was still mean for him to do that to her. But maybe she should forgive him. he apologized and he seemed like he actually cared.

You decided to call him and talk to him. Maybe apologize? Ask him what his favourite drink is. Alcohol is good you should do this more often.

you pressed the call button and took a big swig of your drink getting ready to talk.

"Angel hello?"

"Hey hawks" you slurred your words slightly. "I wanted to call you because it's so difficult to type! The buttons are so little and I keep messing up. Now I know what your thinking, she's drunk right? Well no actually I'm just a little tipsy. Oh! I forgot to say what I was calling about. I wanted to apologize, I was being a total bitch don't you think?" You took a quick swig and went back to talking "but you were kinda mean to me. But I liked you! I even bought a fucking dress for you. And I don't do dresses. Believe that? I got all dressed up for you. And you never showed. But hero duties are more important than anything" you took another swig "damn this shit is strong!"

He sat there trying to take in everything she had just said. To be fair it was a lot to handle. " Y/n your drunk why are you drinking?"

"Because why the hell not?" She said and laughed

"You want to apologize I want to apologize to face to face."

"Come over them Birdy I need some company I can't finish this big bottle all by myself." At this point you really couldn't think straight. This was 100% a bad idea but did you care? Absolutely not.

"Y/n your drunk we should talk tomo-"

"No come over nowwww pleaseeeeeeee" you whined

he sighed "Ok leave the balcony open I'll land there."

"Yay! I'll be waiting for you im so excited!"

You quickly hung up and went to wait for him on the balcony. You sat with your legs crossed and kept drinking. You got up and looked over the ledge. Damn that was a farrr drop. You stumbled a little leaning a little to far, and almost fell until you felt a warm pair of hands wrap around your waist. "Are you fucking crazy kid? Do you have a death wish?"

You started laughing "oh my god I almost fell good thing I have wings. You saved me! Your like my knight in shining armor" you smiled and went to take another swig only to have him take it away from you.

He looked at the bottle. "You drank almost half of this already! Are you crazy? Oh my god come on" he lead you inside trying to figure the layout of your house. He went into your kitchen and got you a water bottle from your fridge.

"Here drink this your gonna need it. Let's go sit down ok?" He lead you to the couch, you almost fell a couple times but with his help you made it.

"Hawksssss"

"Yes angel" he looked over to you, you were both now sitting on the couch, and he was trying to make sure you did nothing stupid.

"Thank you for coming I was sooo lonely. And I'm sorry for this morning I was being a big poopy head" you said and at the end you stuck your bottom lip out and gave him puppy eyes.

"It's no problem angel. I would always help a friend in need more matter what. And you don't have to apologize it was mostly my fault I was being a dumb bird and messed it up." He said looking at you with guilt. You felt bad honestly. But what stuck the most was when he said he would always help a friend..

"I wish we were more then friends I really liek you.." you slurred and went on "your really cute to. And your wings are so pretty I just wanna touch them. Can I touch them?" You asked already reaching out to them

"Of course baby bird just be careful you have wings to so you'll know how it feels." He pulled his wings further out so that you could reach them easily. He was a little scared only a few other people had touched his wings. And they had never been drunk before. His wings were quite sensitive, he was touch starved and that made it feel amazing when someone touched his wings.

You leaned in and touched the middle of his wings first, slowly running your hand over them. You face lit up like a kid opening his presents on Christmas. You raked your hands through his feathers.

"Your feathers are so soft! How do you get them so soft!?" You asked excitedly. Your feathers weren't as soft as his, they'd been through a lot and due to some harsh training were trying to recover still.

"There just n-naturally soft I guess are yours not t-this soft?" He asked as he was trying to keep back his groans. Your fingers felt so good rubbing against his feathers.

"They were but after bad training there not as soft anymore. Want to feel?" She asked excitedly, taking her hands away. He tried to hide his disappointment, and shook his head yes.

she pulled her wings out, giving off a soft glow as her quirk made her. He reached out to his hands. He softly touched the tip of her wings. She sat back and relaxed feeling calm at the touches he was giving her. It was way better then the little kids that tugged on her wings when she had them out.

"What kind of training did this? There still soft just seem like they've been through a lot.."

"Well it was a really rainy day. And they were working me so hard. We were in a empty field and I was paired with one of the higher ranks, so I had to try my hardest. They thought I was weak so they pushed me a little to far, until my wings were covered with mud and all the nasty shit on the ground."

He had a apologetic look on his face as he continued to stroke your wings. "Who's they?"

"I-oh I don't really tell many people but when my parents had found out I had wings, they had to report it to the government, who wanted to put me in intense training from when I was just 4. I knew how to kill someone before I knew how to write my own name correctly. I've heard you went through the same if I'm correct?" Y/n was almost surprisingly sober now.

"Yeah it's not something I like to talk about. I'm sorry they put you through that. Me and you are more alike then we seem arnt we?" He asked while taking his hand away from your wings.

you internally sighed in disappointment when he took his hand away. "I guess we might be. C-can we watch a movie or something?" She asked hoping he would stay just a little longer.

"Only if I can still take you to get ice cream soon?" He asked testing the waters to see if she was still mad.

"Of course you bird brain." She grabbed the remote and turned on  {favourite movie}.

"Oh I love this movie!" He said with excitement as he got comfortable next to you.

You smiled looking at him. You were no longer mad but thought if this went on would that happen again? Would he handle it differently? As the thoughts were running through your mind, you felt the heaviness of sleep washing over you. You closed your eyes and let it involve you.

Hawks POV

I turned to check on y/n, and as I turned she was just falling asleep. Her head slowly made its way into my shoulder. I blushed slightly. Y/n was beautiful. Even with her hair a mess she was still pretty to him.

As he was admiring her, she moved in her sleep, grabbing his arm and hugging it as she slept.

'God she's perfect'

#hawks x reader #hawksbnha #bnha hawks #hawks #mha hawks #hawks x y/n #hawks x me #hawks x you #90s anime #minecraft #tabletop #steam games #sports anime #shoujo #sailor moon #pc games #overwatch #nintendo #bnha au #bnha angst #bnha fanfiction

[mackeydoodledoo]

Two Different Types of Musicians

Pairing: Jesy Nelson x (Fem!)Reader

Summary: You're a musician who plays instruments, so you are a renowned Guitarist, Bassist and of many other instruments however, mainly guitar and bass. Jesy Nelson is most known for being in the British girl group; Little Mix. In Little Mixs' upcoming tour, their managers and producers want to pick the best of the best musicians to help them with this tour. One of them happens to be you.... 

Warnings: Past Trauma

A/N: This is in 1st person

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

As I step out if the gate, I grab some food. I grab my big suitcase and my guitar and begin making my way to the exit of the airport. I hail a cab to head to the O2 arena and I pay with the money I was able to convert for England.

"What’s the occasion you're here for?" The cab driver asks

"For a Tour," I answer, trying to not have the guy ask too many questions

He doesn't ask many more, thank god. And so I step out as soon as I grab my guitar from the trunk and take out my "Tour member" pass. However as soon as I close the trunk, I recognize one of the Little Mix members outside. I saw a swarm of fans beginning to form around her; security guards trying to keep them back. I slowly begin snaking around the crowd however, more people just keep on coming. However once I make it through, she spots me and smiles and walks over. She takes my hand and rushes back inside.

"How was your flight love?" Jesy asks

"Oh it was pretty laid back," I start, "But I am absolutely slap-happy!"

Jesy turns to look at me, confused at whatvi said.

"Slap-happy is a band term back home," I smile

She smiles with me and continues to lead me to the stage area. There I see Perrie, Leigh-Anne and Jade. If im going to be honest I didn't think I'd get to go on tour with Little Mix. Or any type of band for that matter.

"So you're the one excellent Guitar player our manager hand picked?" Jade comes up to me and gives me a hug

I give one back and to the same to the rest of the girls and I get introduced to the live band.

"So what do you have for us to show off your amazing skills?" Perrie asks

I smirk and click my tongue and gently place my guitar case down and proceed to take her out. Her name is Shelby Toro. Her body color is a Silver Base with medium to large sparkles and a Deep Ocean Blue racing stripe vinyl. She's a Fender/Squier Jazzmaster. She has a Squier body/hardware and a Fender Jazzmaster neck. She has a black woven designed strap. I plug in my wireless system transmitters and play a C chord and begin tuning her. As soon as she's tuned, I call out to the sound system people and tell them to play "Bulletproof heart" by My Chemical Romance. I put in a headset that also plays the song so I can listen to the lyrics. Because I already have the riff memorized. Everyone begins making their way to the audience and begin watching me.

Gravity

Don't mean too much to me

I'm who I've got to be

These pigs are after me

After you

Run away

Like it was yesterday

And we can run away

If we could run away

Run away from here

I begin to play the power chord and begin jamming out to the music and begin getting into it. I notice everyone has their jaw on the floor. Especially Jesy. I kneel down and begin making eye contact with her. I could see the sparkles from my guitar in her eyes. I couldn't help but smile at her.

I gotta Bulletproof Heart

You gotta Hallow point smile

We had our run away scarves

Got a photograph dream on the getaway mile

I wanted to hold her hand as I sing to her however, my right hand is strumming and my left had is making the notes. So, I give her a wink and a kiss, feeling in the moment of the music. I stand up and begin to close my eyes, letting the music take me into my place, both of my hands instinctively playing the lead guitar riff, letting the song sing itself out. Once the solo arrives, I turn myself around and begin backbending. Letting my back bend me as far as it'll go without me falling backward. As the solo begins to end, I bend myself back up and put my foot on one of the floor lights as I ring out the last note of the solo. Once I ring out the last note of the song, I watch Perrie, Leigh-Anne, Jade and Jesy run up on stage as I put my guitar on a stand. Jesy practically jumps into my arms and I stumble back.

"That was amazing," she says, "How did you do that with the backbending, and the part where you closed your eyes and began feeling the music?"

"Been playing for years now," I smile, "Perks of being a band kid."

I settle myself into the back with all of the other live band members and they all begin congratulating me on a really great performance.

Once rehearsal ends, we all head back to the airport to Paris, France for the opening night of the tour.

"Y/N, can I talk to you for a minute?" Jade says

As I lock my case and stand up as I loop the case strap around me.

"I saw how Jesy looked at you during your initiation performance," Jade starts, "I'm supposed to sit next to her but I think she'll have a great time on the plane ride next to you."

"Thanks Jade," I smile, switching our tickets

I catch up to Jesy.

"Hey love," she says, "Would you wanna grab food when we get to Paris?"

"Oh for sure," I smile

I unintentionally hold onto Jesy's hand as we begin trying to sweep through the crowd to get to the cars. But I follow Jesy closely as she begins signing as many autographs as she can give.

"Is it true you two are going to go steady?" A fan asks

Jesy blushes as I look at them confused. And I remember our joined hands.

"Um no," I stutter, "We literally just met today."

However, I feel a pair of lips press lightly on my cheek. I look at her and she gives out her signature witch laugh. I blush. Not because of the light cheek kiss, but because of her laugh. I really enjoyed listening to it when I watch a compilation of their funny moments. The fans screech and cheer as Jesy drags me to the car to head to the airport.

"What was that for?" I ask

"Just for giggles," she laughs, "besides I think you liked it too. Seeing how red you went."

"Shut up," I laugh, gently nudging her in the shoulder.

I watch the city lights go by as we drive tk the airport. However, I feel Jesy lean into me. She must've had a long day.... Same here love. I gently wrap my arm around her to give her a more comfortable pillow as we wait.

We finally reach the airport, again, a handful of fans try to get photos with them or want autographs. I catch up with the rest of the live band and we head inside of the airport, no one really paid any attention to us. As we wait inside, I scroll through my phone when I feel a pair of hands slowly coiling around my waist. I almost jump and accidentally elbow Jesy in the face.

"Oh, God you scared me," I laugh, "How'd that go out there?"

"Chaotic," Jesy laughs

I laugh with her and we make our way to our gate to go to Paris. I put Shelby Toro with my suitcase and pay the extra whatever it costed. I hold onto Jesy's hand again as we continue to our gate. As we sit in the terminal area, I yawn.

"Jet lag?" Perrie asks

"Well I'm just tired in general Perrie," I crack my knuckles

Jesy gently rubs my back and I'm going to be honest.... It was therapeutic. Especially when Jesy rolls her thumb against my back.

Once we finally get on the plane and land in Paris, Jesy hails a cab for us two and get breakfast somewhere. The show didn't start until the day after tomorrow so we had a little bit of time to chill.

"So.... I understand you've been having rough times," I start, "We don't have to talk about it here or in general if you don't feel comfortable."

"Somewhere else would be lovely," Jesy says

"I don't mean to hop right into that but, I understand how you felt, or even still feel to this day," I state

Jesy looks at me, not like Stop Talking but as if she's interested in my story.

"Well," I clear my throat, "it started when I was in high school. It was my second year and i am thriving with some new friends I've made. They were new to the school and so I was like 'oh they're cool I wanna be friends with them!' And we hit it off well and when I started showing them how I usually am. Especially with the high school marching band, they stopped talking to me all of a sudden. In a panic, I was trying to ask them what was wrong, if I made them mad or if I did something wrong. One of them told me I did nothing wrong but then proceeds to block me. Next day I couldn't talk to them and then I get called to the counseling office. I'm ushered into a small office space just to be told, how I act around my trusted people was wrong and that I should have stopped.-"

I clearly begin feeling slight tears forming into my eyes but I try my best to not show how much it hurt around Jesy.

"And I sobbed in that confined room and I wanted to leave but the counselor didn't let me," I continue. "So I forced myself to stop crying and I left. The next few months I felt really depressed and.... I-it was the first time I had suicidal thoughts. That's all I've been thinking about and no matter how many times my close friends tried to comfort me I always revert back to being depressed and wanting to no longer feel the pain I felt."

I feel a thumb gently wipe across my cheek and her other thumb gently stroking the back of my hand.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry that happened to you," she says

"However, I am doing better than I did at that time," I state, "But more important question, are you okay?"

Jesy just looks at me.... I was about to open my mouth when Jesy opens hers.

"I'm quite alright," she answers, "Thanks love."

"I really should be thanking you," I say, "Thanks for listening to my whole shit show."

"I don't want anyone going down a dark path love," she says, "I'm here for you."

We make eye contact and I was about to make a comment before I heard a phone ring. It was Jesy's. We were requested back to the rehearsal venue and we take a taxi to the venue.

The two of us walk in and I already see the drummer setting up my guitar.

"Thanks dude!" I call out

He gives me a thumbs up and goes back to his drumset.

"Did you two enjoy your date?" Jade asks, teasing me

"Yes we did it sweetheart," Jesy answers but in a joking tone

Knowing myself, I'm oblivious if someone likes me and is showing me by flirting or they're just being nice. I nod along and I walk over to tune my guitar.

Tour goes amazingly, crowd is always awesome and the girls tend to give us the spotlight. Every other night the girls would want us to play a couple of songs. And mostly for the encore we all agreed to just have a little mix out on stage. We're fine with that as we need a break too. We were in the final show, which was using the UK, easy for the girls to go home.

"You alright love?" Jesy comes up to me

"Yeah," I answer, stretching out my wrists, "I never thought I'd be touring with any sort of band. So cross that off my bucket list."

Before I leave to warm up with the live band, I tuck hair behind my ear and plant a gentle kiss in Jesy's cheek.

"Good luck love," I say, mimicking Jesy's accent

"That was really good actually," Jesy laughs

That damn laugh again.... She might have it but I love it. A natural laugh is the best kind of laugh to hear. The both of us part ways for now.

#jesy nelson #we love you jesy #little mix #jesy nelson x reader #little mix imagine #jesy nelson imagine #female guitarist #lm imagines #leigh anne pinnock #perrie edwards #jade thirlwall #rock music

[hollyxqx]

lover, leaver  //  jimin  //  03

↪ PAIRING: Reader/Park Jimin (initally reader/Jungkook) ↪ SUMMARY: There’s only so much cheating you can take from your boyfriend when he’s on tour before you take matters in to your own hands. ↪ WORD COUNT: 8.5k

↪ WARNINGS: lots of infidelity | substance (alcohol & drugs) abuse | heavy angst | characters are quite flawed (who isn’t) | rockstar!jungkook | soft artist!jimin | mentions of abortion/unwanted pregnancy talk | smut 

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | FINAL

You go home to change out of your work clothes, having been in them for far too long. To your surprise Jungkook is there, albeit sitting in almost complete darkness. You jump in shock when you flip the light on to reveal him slumped on the sofa, unconscious, a glass half filled with whiskey tilts dangerously in his loose grip.

You swear softly with a sigh as you make your way over to him. You check to make sure he's breathing, knowing his propensity for drinking heavily. The last thing you would ever want is him to drink himself to death. To your relief he is; small, shallow breaths but breaths nonetheless.

You move the whiskey glass to the coffee table and arrange Jungkook so he is laying on his side, in case he vomits in his sleep. From the kitchen you retrieve a bowl for him to throw up into if he needs it and some water. As you pull the blanket that rests on the back of the couch over him he stirs.

"Baby?" He slurs. It's barely coherent but he's called you it enough times for you to be able to understand what he's saying. You've also heard him call you that wasted hundreds of times. He reaches out for you and you notice his knuckles are bruised. There's dried blood on them too.

"Shhh, just go to sleep." You coo, moving some of his hair out of his clammy face.

"Stay." He mumbles.

"I'm staying." You're unsure if he means stay in this exact spot with him or stay in your apartment. Before he can clarify he's out again, eyes fluttering shut and body limp. You watch him for a few moments to make sure he'll be okay. When you're at least marginally sure he won't die in his sleep you head to bed, exhausted from the past few days.

At some point a slightly soberer Jungkook crawls into bed beside you. You feign sleep as he wraps his arms around you. When he kisses your cheek and whispers that he loves you it becomes hard not to cry. "Jungkook we need to talk in the morning." You whisper.

"I know." He whispers back.

Somehow, you both manage to fall asleep, despite everything.

***

It's undeniably awkward the next morning.

You sit opposite each other at the kitchen table but your eyes bore into your - now cold - mug of coffee. Jungkook finished his long ago but you can't seem to stomach yours.

It's quiet. The two of you have exchanged maybe a handful of words the entire time, aside from forcing some pleasantries. You can barely take the tension any longer. You encourage yourself to meet his gaze. "I saw what you did to Jimin." You say quietly. You're angry (well, only mostly at yourself)  but you're more so hurt on behalf for Jimin than anything.

"He deserved it." Jungkook replies bluntly, crossing his arms across his chest. "Fucking snakey little shit."

"Don't direct the entirety of your anger towards him. I'm the bad guy here."

"If I direct it at you then I'll never want to look at you again." He sighs. "I don't want that. I don't want to lose you."

His words rip at your insides like a knife. You hadn't anticipated this reaction from him. Normally he was always so fiery and passionate. To see him acting defeated, broken even was heart wrenching. "Don't you think on some level you've lost me already?" You ask quietly.

The hurt that flashes across his face is instant as if you've slapped him. "No." He replies defiantly.

"Jungkook," You're trying to be gentle, the risk of the situation escalating is high enough as it is. "I'm sorry for everything I did. It makes me a fucking horrible person - it does. But if our relationship was perfect, it would've never happened. On either side."

He scoffs. "Nothing's perfect."

He stands, the chair scooting loudly across the tiled floor and opens the cupboard. You already know what's about to happen before it does. The next moment he's fixing himself a drink. Of course. Jungkook has always been self destructive when he's hurting.

"Kook, it's 10.30am."

"So? I've got nowhere to be today." He downs the liquid in one before going in for seconds.

"This is exactly what I'm talking about!" You exclaim. "Getting drunk during the day is not normal. You never used to do that!"

"Yeah? Well I also never used to have the amount of pressure on me I do now!" He's yelling now and you flinch. You hate seeing him angry. "You think it's easy to keep it together when I have a manager, a record label, sponsors and god knows who else pressuring me to write music I don't want to?"

"I didn't think about it like that. I'm sorry." You look down.

"There's a fucking entire world of people who have expectations from me. You don't know what it's like." He runs a hand through his hair, exasperated. "I was just trying to cope. Maybe have a little fun. Sue me."

"You're good at hiding how you feel, Jungkook. You've always been."

"Everyone thinks I'm just this happy, easy going guy with no feelings." He mutters. "Even you. That's why you went running to Jimin."

"I went running to Jimin to deal with the pain of you relentlessly cheating on me." You correct. Jungkook tosses back his drink.

"Did it work?" He mumbles, rolling his eyes.

"Honestly?" You ask with a scoff. Jungkook nods. "Sometimes."

He stares bitterly at the empty glass, swirling the remaining liquid. "I keep trying to remember times where I thought you were cheating, but there isn't any. Not one." He laughs but there's no humour to his voice. "You waited for me to go on tour didn't you? Smart."

"You don't cheat when you're at home. Why should I?" You say, shame burning your cheeks. It sounds absolutely absurd to say it aloud. He walks over to you and stands behind you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as you sit.

"I'm sorry I hurt you baby." He coos. All you can do is nod, arms limp by your sides. "I never thought of it as cheating, I'm a fucking idiot. I'm so fucking sorry."

He's nosing at your hair, kissing the top of your head, doing what he always does - shower you with so much love and affection so you forget the mistakes that he makes. It's worked so many times but you can't let it work this time, the cycle has to end. You nudge him off of you and he steps back, looking crestfallen. "I love you Jungkook but I can't do this anymore."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I can't continue to play dumb to the girls on tour. I can't do it. Not anymore. I don't think I'm fit to be your girlfriend. Maybe there's other girls out there who can deal with that shit but I can't." You're frantically shaking your head from side to side.

"Is this so you can be with him?" He spits, gesturing as if Jimin was standing in the room next door.

"No!" You stress. "This has nothing to do with him. I cheated on you Jungkook. I've never done anything like that before. This relationship made me a person who would do that. It's been a long time coming I think." You say sadly. Jungkook looks furious and heartbroken at the same time, hands balled into fists at his sides.

"I don't want to be apart. I love you." He almost hisses. "This is ridiculous. If was going to forgive you, why can't you do the same?"

"Because I know you won't change!" You burst out loudly, meeting his energy. Somehow you find yourself standing on your feet, the chair tips to the floor but you barely register the sound.  Jungkook yells out, throwing his glass. It smashes against the wall opposite you and you nearly jump out of your skin.

"You're really going to throw away two years like that?" He pants, chest heaving.

"I'm sorry."

"No you're fucking not. You're a fucking slutty bitch, is what you are."

He storms out, leaving you to clean up the shattered glass. The front door slams, leaving you in almost unbearable silence. ***

The doctor's office clinical sharp scent fills your head as you sit with Hyerin several hours later. She's nervous; foot tapping incessantly against the metal leg of the waiting room chair. You give her hand an affectionate squeeze as she lets out a deep breath. "Chill. No matter what happens, it's ok." You offer her the most hopeful smile you can.

"Thanks." She mumbles.

You weren't going to fill her in on your morning's previous events but Hyerin had begged you for a distraction. Anything to get her mind off her current state, even if it was just for a few moments. You'd yet to tell her about Jimin being a huge factor. That could wait.

"Good luck." You whisper to her as her name is called by a rather young looking doctor. You watch as she disappears through the double doors, worrying about your friends future.

to: park jimin hey. how are you doing? I can bring you food later, im not working today.

You don't really expect a reply but you're hopeful nonetheless. You still need to talk properly with Jimin and as awkward as it might be it has to be done. It's your bed, time to lie in it.

As you were about to put your phone away it vibrates in your palm. Jungkook's name appears.

from: jungkook <3 i'll be gone until tomorrow night. When i get back I want you and your shit gone.

It was his place after all, he was completely within his right to request such a thing from you. That didn't deaden the sting however. He was hurting and lashing out, you were aware of his tendency to do that but he had been your boyfriend for a long time, it was never going to be easy saying goodbye.

You sigh audibly as you mentally start making a plan to retrieve your belongings. Maybe you could ask Hyerin to help, god knows you two need each other in this moment in time. You wonder if she would let you kick it on her couch for a while until you find a place to live. The timing is hardly great, considering you have exams soon as well. Why couldn't Jungkook wait to cheat on you until after you graduated, you think dryly.

It's not long until Hyerin returns. Her face is flushed and you realise there's probably been a few tears shed since she left you some moments ago. She's nodding as she crosses the room, wordlessly confirming her pregnancy to you. "Come on," You say gently, looping your arm through hers. "Tell me all about it in the car."

She lets out a choked sob the moment your both in the silence of the vehicle. "I can't believe this is honest to god my life right now." She cries, slamming a fist onto the dashboard. "Fuck my fucking existence!"

"What did the doctor say?" You ask hesitantly. You want her to have her moment and vent her frustrations before launching in to the story.

"I'm 100% pregnant. 9 weeks." She sniffs, swiping a tear off her pink cheeks. "It's official."

"Shit." You don't know if you want to apologise or congratulate her, given her extremely upset reaction. "What now?"

She gathers herself as best she can before she replies. "Tell Namjoon, I 'spose."

"Want me to drive you to him?" You offer.

"Nah, I need to go home first. Look - " She's pulling something out her purse, that you quickly realise is an ultrasound. It doesn't look like anything much to you other than a gray and black blur.

"The baby has your eyes." You joke, a feeble attempt to lighten the mood. Hyerin laughs a little as she gazes at the print out.

"It didn't feel real until she handed me this." Hyerin mumbles.

"It is surreal. Next time use a condom, babe."

"I did!" She exclaims, scandalised. "It broke."

You both share a laugh despite everything that's going on with you. It feels just plain good to have a light moment, however temporary. You almost don't want to ruin it, but you feel as if it's necessary. "While you were in there Jungkook texted. He wants me out. By tomorrow."

"Jeez, that's intense."

"He's angry I ended things."

"You can stay with me if you need to. I have a spare bedroom." Hyerin kindly offers. You're touched that you didn't even have to ask, feeling closer in this moment to her than ever.

"You're an angel."

"You've been a good friend to me. I'm just doing what's right." She gives you a small smile as you start the car, ready to take her home.

***

Boxing and packing your things from home is harder than you expect it to me. There's so much of Jungkook entwined in nearly everything you own and a tiny, rageful, hurt part of you wants to just say fuck it and bin absolutely everything. Obviously you can't - but the wild impulse niggles at you.

A lot of the clothing you own is stolen from him. Mostly it's band t's and hoodies. You wonder if he would prefer that you left it behind. Maybe not, you think wistfully. Knowing him, he'd probably chuck it out anyway, unwilling to have anything that reminded him of you.

It's late into the night when you're interrupted by knocking at the front door. You hoist yourself up from where you kneel at the foot of your closet, next to a mountain of clothes and pad barefoot to the door. One look through the peephole reveals it's Jimin who is knocking.

You recall suddenly that you never heard back from him.

"Jimin?" You ask curiously as you peer round the door. Your heart aches when you notice he has a bag of takeout food with him. "What are you doing here?"

"Thought you might be hungry." He replies quietly. You realise that you are indeed, unable to even remember when you last ate. "Can I come in?"

You try not to gawk too much at his injured face as he crosses the threshold into your apartment, a pang of guilt shooting directly through you. It's your fault he looks like that. Somehow it appears even more gruesome as it's healing.

He doesn't ask where to go, instinctively heading for the living room where you ate before. You follow behind him, a flutter of nerves creeping up your chest. Jimin sits and immediately starts unboxing the food.

"It's late." You say dumbly, pointing out the obvious. "Why aren't you sleeping?"

"I spoke to Namjoon." Jimin states, eyes never leaving the food. You know what that means. It means he knows everything. There's no way Jungkook wouldn't have mentioned anything. You take a seat next to him and give him some help. "Thought you might need a hand."

"With packing? I'm almost done."

"Well yeah, but other things too. Sometimes it's nice just to have some company when shit hits the fan."

You notice he's ordered your favourite noodles. It's so gut wrenchingly sweet and you definitely don't deserve it. "Thank you." You say, feeling small.

It's quiet as the two of you eat, the only sounds that can be heard is that of noodles being slurped. The food is welcome and much needed.

"Where are you going to go? I'd offer my place but I'm almost certain you'd turn me down." He gives you a smile that never reaches his eyes. However he's right. There's no way you'd accept that offer. Not after the mess you've created. Part of you wonders if you run away now, just leave, at least him and Jungkook's friendship can be salvaged.

"Hyerin very kindly has offered me a place, don't worry." You inform him. "I went with her to the doctor today. There is a baby on the way. For realsies."

Jimin stops chewing, looking at you in shock. "Namjoon as a father is going to be a disaster."

You shrug. "True....but it's their lives. They'll work it out."

"And what about your life hm? What is y/n going to do now?" He set his empty carton of food down, turning a little to face you.

"I don't know," You almost whisper. As you look - truly inspect - his face your pained once more. The bruises are darker, more agonising to look at it. "How's your face?" You ask, changing the subject.

"Sore."

"I'm so sorry." You almost beg. "Do you hate me?"

"I don't think I could even if I tried."

You're unsure of what comes over you, but you're reaching out to touch Jimin's bruised face. A fingertip skims as delicately as you can muster over the purple blooming on his cheek. His eyes flutter shut at your touch. "Sorry." You murmur.

"s'fine." He whispers back. Your thumb trails over his full bottom lip and all you want to do is kiss him. Normally you would have just gone for it but after everything he's been through you don't.

"I wish I could kiss you."

"You can." His eyes are open once again, staring at you softly.

"I don't want to hurt you. Anymore than I already have." You say sheepishly.

"You won't."

He acts next, bridging the gap between your bodies. His kiss is far more delicate than you expect, tender and sweet as if he's afraid. You hope he's not and it's just because he's injured. That thought floats away as soon as a hand grips your jaw and the kiss deepens.

You know you shouldn't be doing this, instead mentioning to him the information that Jungkook shared with you, but you feel so much affection for him in that moment for being willing to take care of you that you can't help it.

The kiss ends abruptly when your hand touches his torso absent mindedly and he gasps in pain. "I'm sorry!" You say urgently, pulling away. He shakes his head, assuring you he's okay. "Please don't tell me that was Jungkook as well. What exactly did he do to you?" You plead.

"You know how strong he is. He just roughed me up. I'm sure you can imagine the kind of things he said to me. Believe me that was worse." Jimin says nonchalantly as if it's the most normal sentence in the world. "I'll be okay."

"Can I see?" You ask tentatively, tugging slightly at the hem of his shirt. He gives you a reluctant sigh but nods anyway. The shirt comes off and you gasp at his battered body. It takes a few seconds to really take all of it in, the sight of his pale chest covered in ugly marks.

"I bruise easy." He mumbles as if that makes any of this any less horrific.

"I'll never get you in a situation like this again I swear," You say solemnly. "I mean it."

"Stop blaming yourself so much." He sighs, taking your hand in his. He kisses the back of your knuckles. "I forgive you. There, now you can stop saying sorry."

***

It doesn't take long for you to be atop of Jimin's naked body while he lies flat on the sofa. One arm grips the edge of the sofa as you ride him, due to the nature of his injuries. His hands grip your hips tightly as you go, falling down onto his length as hard and as fast as your thigh muscles allow you.

His eyes never leave your breasts as they bounce with you. It makes him groan. He uses his feet for leverage to help you as best he can. "Butterfly," He whines, hands sliding from your hips to grope at your chest. "I'm so glad you're all mine now."

You can barely speak let alone protest his statement as your orgasm pulses through you. What you wanted to do was ask him what the hell he was talking about, but it felt too good - he felt too good buried so tightly inside of you and you lost it.

Jimin finishes deep inside with a guttural moan. As you slow you look down at him to find an utterly content smile playing on his lips. You go to clamber off of him but a throaty noise of protest escapes his throat. "Just let me feel you a little longer." He laughs.

He struggles to a sitting position as best he can so allowing him to press his mouth to yours. "My butterfly." He whispers against your lips.

Reality seems to set in suddenly, like a slap to the face. Jimin has incorrectly assumed that you would jump straight from Jungkook to him at a whiplash inducing speed. Not that you can blame him. How could he not? It probably felt like a natural step to him that you two would continue as you had been going. Now Jungkook was out of the picture,  the only apparent obstacle keeping you apart, you were his now. Right?

It doesn't feel right.

You say nothing as you climb off him, feeling uncomfortable as if someone has poured ice water down your spine. You don't want a relationship with him  right now. You're barely hours out of your last one for crying out loud.

Hastily you pick up your scattered clothing and scurry to the bathroom to clean up, mumbling something to Jimin along the way. He's quick to follow you.

"What's wrong?" He asks hurriedly, voice full of concern. Your words are lost to you as you shake your head. "I didn't hurt you or anything did I?"

"No," You say weakly, feeling like a coward. "It's not that."

Hyper aware of the fact that you're both naked you begin to dress. "Can we just clean up then talk?" You plead.

"Sure." Jimin has a combination of a hurt, confused look on his face. "Anything you want, just tell me what's wrong."

When you're both fully clothed and completely out of the carnal state that led you to fucking in the first place only then can you think clearly. "Are you angry? Did I do something wrong?" His voice breaks the uncomfortable silence.

"No, no." You sigh. "Do you think we're...together? Now that things have ended with Jungkook?" It doesn't come out as tactfully as you'd hoped.

"This is because I called you mine, right?" He says letting out a puff of laughter. It's humourless. "What else are we if not together?"

"Jungkook and I just broke up. Don't you think I might need a little space?"

"Please, your relationship with him was over the second you fucked me." Jimin scoffs. "Don't I treat you right? Aren't you happy when we're together?"

"You do. I am." You reply, softening slightly at his words. "I think I just need a break from relationships for a bit. I'm clearly not very good at them."

"So letting me in tonight and fucking me is the way to do that?" He spits sarcastically.

"One thing led to another, I wasn't thinking clearly. I just wanted to feel close to you." You reply, realizing how ridiculous you sound right now.

"If you wanted to feel close to me, let me be close to you." He says sincerely. Jimin steps forward cupping your face in his hands. "Tell me you don't feel anything when we're together. Tell me this isn't just messing around. Tell me you feel something."

He kisses you with as much intensity as he can muster, lips smacking hard against yours. You want to lie to him, push him away and suffer because you feel as if that's what you truly deserve. But you can't. The look in his eyes is nothing short of sheer want.

"Of course I do," You whisper, eyes still shut as you gather some strength. It's been an emotionally intense few days.

"But?" He asks if he can sense what's coming.

"But now is not the right time for me and you," You stress. "I've been really thankful for you Jimin. You've been here for me in ways you don't even realise. But I cannot just jump into a new relationship without dealing with my baggage from the old one. It's not fair to either of us. I've hurt you so much. I don't want to hurt anyone anymore."

He looks at you silently, brow furrowed, for what feels like eons. Deep down you hope he knows you're right, especially if he truly wants to be with you. He kisses you one more time.

"I love you, y/n." He whispers. "I'm in love with you."

You're quite literally left speechless. It's not exactly news to you given what Jungkook had mentioned but hearing it from Jimin is something else. It feels surreal, a strange dream you'll wake up from at any moment. You move your mouth but no sound escapes.

You finally get your breath but it takes a moment. "I don't think I'm there in that place with you, Jiminie." You say sadly, letting the boy who had been so kind to you down. You barely know what you're feeling right now. How can you admit something if you're not entirely sure its true?

You love Jungkook, you know that. But it's entirely different to what you feel for Jimin. It's established love, endured love. Painful love.

"I know. But I think you could be. One day. Maybe even one day soon." Jimin whispers.

He steps back a little so you're no longer in such an intimate proximity. The distance suddenly feels great. You badly want to reach out to him but you know it won't help anything. "Maybe," You agree. "I think if I have some time I'll know for sure. I don't want to lie. I'm sick of it."

"I understand." His voice is small. "I think I'm going to go. I'll give you some space y/n."

You nod, feeling entirely mixed up, emotionally drained and shattered. He gathers his things as you watch, it somehow feels all together too final. There's a chaste kiss on your cheek, a whispered goodbye and he's gone.

***

You awake early the next morning, like pre-alarm early. Not that you slept very much anyway, it's been only two and a half hours since Jimin left your apartment. Most of that time you spent dozing in a light sleep, odd dreams of Jungkook and Jimin plaguing your subconscious. There's a futile attempt to get back to sleep before you decide to get up.

You wash and get ready even though it's still a few hours before Hyerin is due to arrive to help you move. She insisted she was fine to do so and you'd argued back on forth about letting a pregnant woman lift anything, regardless of how far along she is. Eventually she'd succumbed and managed to rope in her friend Taehyung. You'd promised them pizza as a thank you.

As you stare into the mirror, the person staring back at you looks exhausted. You almost don't even want to bother with makeup but the bags underneath your eyes are telling you that you need it. When you're finished you look better, but marginally.

"You look like you haven't slept." Are the first words out of Hyerin's mouth the moment she see's you. Who you presume to be Taehyung hangs awkwardly behind her before you're introduced. He merely gives you a polite nod and a hello.

"I haven't. Not much." You sigh. "I really appreciate you both helping me out today."

Hyerin waves it off like it's no problem at all, even though it must be a huge inconvenience for her and especially for Taehyung who doesn't even know you. It doesn't take long for the three of you to load up Hyerin and Taehyung's cars and you're thankful you only have to make one trip. You're keen to be long gone by the time Jungkook comes back.

"You can ride with me, Taehyung will meet us at my place." Hyerin says as she closes the trunk of her car. You nod in agreement.

"One sec, I'm just going to grab my phone." You tell her as she gets in the car. You head back to your apartment for one last time.

It looks...sad. It's not entirely empty, Jungkook's items taking up a poignant amount of space but it looks stripped. Every little touch that said you lived there is gone. Reality weighs on your chest like a deadweight. You can't help but feel emotional and tears begin to well in your eyes.

There's only one thing left to do now, and that's to leave your copy of the key. If you had told past you one week ago this is where you'd be you wouldn't believe it. It's all very sudden.

You slip the key off your keychain and leave it on the kitchen counter, hoping it would be easy for Jungkook to find. It looks lonely lying against the countertop. An idea occurs to you and you grab a pen and paper from one of the junk drawers in the kitchen. You write a note to Jungkook.

Jungkook, I know you're angry, hurting and probably hating me right now. I get it. I never wanted any of this to happen, for us to end this way. Don't forget the good times we had, I know I won't. I really did love you Kookie, regardless of how much we both fucked up. - Y/N

It doesn't feel like enough, nothing ever would be, but your conscience urged to be alleviated, how ever slight.

***

In a way you're almost thankful that it's exam season for you. It's a welcome distraction from everything else going in your life. The last few days have been spent holed up in Hyerin's spare room under what can only be described as a small mountain of books and graphic designs. It's your final year, and the workload is the most it's been yet.

It's a struggle to keep Jimin and Jungkook from your thoughts as you attempt to focus. You haven't heard from either of them in the last few days, not that you were expecting anything at all but it doesn't stop you shedding a few tears every night before bed.

You hear the doorbell ring as you study and your ears perk up in interest. Namjoon was here. Today was the day that Hyerin was going to tell him she was pregnant. You offered to make yourself scarce but she was insistent that you remained, in case everything went disastrously. At least you would be there as shoulder to cry on.

It seems voyeuristic to listen in and you try your best not to, debating on whether you should put music on. Although, you're not really stoked on the idea of alerting Namjoon to your presence, having yet to face him or any other of Jungkook's friends since everything went down. The whole thing was just awkward.

You want to give them their privacy so you search for your headphones, their muffled voices already carrying down the hall. As you're selecting a song to listen to you hear Namjoon yell fuck loudly. He was loud at the best of times so you're not surprised you can hear him through the concrete walls.

Hyerin's voice is much softer so you don't hear her reply.

You cue up some songs and slip your headphones on, drowning out the noise. It's even harder to read your coursework material knowing god knows what is going on just a few feet from your bedroom door. It's only minutes later when a crash richochets through the apartment. The sound is so loud you hear it above your music.

"What the - " You gasp, pulling the headphones down. There's silence for a beat before you hear Namjoon again, this time he's practically screaming 'you've ruined my life'. Your heart aches for your friend who you know will be emotional anyway because of the pregnancy.

"Namjoon, it's not as if I did this by myself." You here her say. "Or on purpose!"

"Well you know what you have to do now, don't you?" He replies. You can imagine the sneering look of disgust that is Hyerin's face right now. Namjoon clearly wanted her to have an abortion, but did he have to be so fucking tactless about it? You don't know how your friend feels about that particular idea but you can imagine Namjoon's tone of voice helps nothing.

"Can't we at least talk about this rationally? This is not a decision that should be taken lightly."

"There's nothing to talk about!" Namjoon yells. "I can't deal with this! You were just a good fuck who is getting carried away. Nothing more!"

You physically wince at his words. You know it's a lie, you've seen them together and you knew Namjoon well enough to know he really liked her. He was the one who made the relationship official, no matter how much he's pretending now.

"Get out." Hyerin's icy voice is stern but shaky. It's obvious she's trying not to cry. If Namjoon responds you don't hear it. The next thing that can be heard is the sound of the front door opening and then slamming shut.

It's as if you're frozen in place, unable to move. On one hand you want to venture out of your room to see if your friend is okay but on the other you really don't want to reveal you heard every single harsh word exchanged. Before you can make up your mind the decision is made for you with three small knocks at your door.

"y/n?"

You wait a moment and then open the door. Hyerin is already in tears and she practically throws herself into your arms the instant she sees you. You hug her back as best you can. It's silent between you too apart from her sobbing. You doubt there's anything in the world you can say in this moment that can possibly make her feel better, so you just try and follow her lead and be there for her as best you can.

Eventually you break apart. "What can I do? Do you want some food or some tea?" You ask uncertainly. She shakes her head.

"I'm feeling too nauseous to stomach anything." She whimpers.

"Do you...want to talk about it?"

"No." She says but contradicts herself when she walks into the room and slumps down on your bed. "Did you hear him storm out?" You nod sadly as you join her. "Asshole." She mutters.

"Yeah, it's kind of a dick move. I take it he didn't react well?"

"That's an understatement." She scoffs. "He wants me to get rid of it. Just like that, without even talking about it."

"I'm not exactly his closest friend, but I do know him pretty well. He's probably just in shock." You offer. It's the truth, Namjoon was really similar to Jungkook in that way, both of them could be volatile when it came to negative emotions.

"And I'm not? He's only thinking about himself." She grabs the nearest pillow and groans into it with frustration. "What the fuck do I do now?" She looks at you. Her face is stained with tears and her make up is ruined. You feel for her. "Is it beyond crazy if I have this baby? Tell me the truth, y/n. Please."

You lick your lips and pause, thinking for a moment. Namjoon and Hyerin have only been official for a few months, for even mature adults in a faithful relationship that's far too early to have a baby. The whole thing was messy and ugly and you would feel just as conflicted if the shoe was on the other foot.

"I can't tell you how to live your life or make this decision for you, I think if it's something you really want, it's not crazy. This is going to sound harsh but you might have to face the possibility of doing it without Namjoon." You tell her gently. "But! That doesn't mean you'll be alone. You've got me, your family, your other friends I know will support you too."

"Do you think Namjoon would even make a good dad?" She asks. The question makes you flinch inwardly. "I've never even seen him around kids. I have no point of reference."

You recall a memory you have of Namjoon playing with Yoongi's nephews once at a garden party. It was cute, he was wonderful with them...because he was like a giant kid too. That doesn't necessarily qualify him as dad material. He was one of the most irresponsible people you knew.

"I've seen him with kids," You tell her softly. "He's great! He's the kind of guy to roll around on the floor and play like he's just as into the game as they are." She smiles a little at your words. "As far as being a parent? I have no idea. Some people crumble under that pressure. But sometimes, that pressure can bring out a side of you that you never knew existed."

Hyerin lets out a long, contemplative sigh and goes quiet for a few moments. "Maybe you're right." She moves to stand up. "Thanks for that y/n, that really helped. Do you feel like coming with me to tell my parents?" She laughs and you can tell she's joking. "Consider Namjoon a walk in the park compared to them."

"My limited therapist skills can only stretch so far, Hyerin." You joke.

"Worth a shot."

***

It's barely over two weeks later when you sit your final exam. You don't feel as if you've done particularly well even though you were as prepared as you could possibly be and it would be weeks before you found out the results. It's with an anxious mind you head home from campus to change into your work clothes. An eight hour shift is the last thing you feel like doing at the moment, but it's not as if you have a choice.

As you're rummaging through your bag for your keys you almost collide with Namjoon, who is waiting outside of the apartment you share with Hyerin. It's a shock, as far as you knew he had been avoiding her messages and calls entirely. Your mouth falls open in silent shock when you see him.

"Hi y/n," He says slowly and the awkward tension between you is palpable. Personally you haven't seen him since the night you caught Jungkook cheating on you. "I was hoping to catch Hyerin but she isn't home. I was just going to wait..."

"She's working, but she shouldn't be long." You shift uncomfortably. "You can come in and wait or...?"

"Yeah I'll come in. If that's ok."

You give him a curt nod and he follows you inside. Neither of you speak for what feels like forever but in reality it's only a minute or two. "You can hang out in the living room if you want. I have to go get ready for work."

Without waiting for a reply you hurry to your room where you change quickly into your waitress uniform and tie your hair into a bun. You hope Hyerin gets here soon so you don't have to make small talk with Namjoon but you have a horrible feeling you won't be so lucky.

When you're done you head to the kitchen to fix yourself something to eat. He's sitting on the sofa, looking bored as he lazily scrolls through his phone. He looks up upon hearing you walk by and your eyes meet. "Do you want something to eat or drink?" You can't help but ask, the polite hostess in you rearing it's head.

"No thanks." He mumbles.

You send Hyerin a quick text as you wait for your soup to heat up, letting her know he's here. Thankfully she's only a few minutes away, information which you relay back to Namjoon. He only nods.

By the time you've eaten and you're ready to leave Hyerin still isn't home. You saunter to the living room and sit opposite him, he watches you curiously. "About everything that's happened - "

"I don't want to hear it. I know what you did to Jungkook, I don't need to talk about it." He responds gruffly, taking you aback. You swallow dryly, that wasn't what you were going to bring up.

"Actually," You begin coldly. "I was going to talk about you and Hyerin."

"That's none of your business." He says equally as icy.

"Why are you being so rude to me? I was going to say I know it's a difficult situation but it's a good thing you're here and I respect you for that." You say, getting angrier. Namjoon looks slightly embarrassed, color slightly tinting his cheeks. "But you know what? Fuck that. You might not want this baby but have you ever thought this baby might not want you? You think a kid dreams about having an alcoholic, drugged up man whore for a father?!"

Namjoon looks away, jaw tense as he shakes his head in disbelief. "Jungkook was right, you're a fucking bitch."

"Why do you both think women that hold you accountable for your actions are bitches? Grow up." You stand now, knowing this can only go downhill from here. You need to remove yourself from the situation. As he is about to give you what is no doubt a scathing retort you're both interrupted by the front door opening. Hyerin was home.

Her gaze immediately flicks between you and Namjoon. "Hi..." She says cautiously.

"Hey," You manage to sound at least somewhat normal but the tension hands heavy in the room. "I'm late for work, I gotta run. Text me later?"

"Sure." She replies, a little bewildered, the only thing she can do is watch you hurry out the door. In your haste you forget a jacket, cursing yourself the moment you get outside.

***

The manila envelope arrives two weeks before your graduation ceremony and in it contains the written proof of four years accumulated hard work. You'd already checked your grades online that morning but somehow the visual of it in black and white on tangible paper feels more substantial. You were expecting to pass if you were truly honest with yourself, however you were not expecting to pass with a Distinction.

It's been a dream of yours since you learned how to draw in school and now that it's come true it doesn't quite feel real. Your hand twitches as you hold your phone, resisting the urge to text Jimin and share the good news. He would have wanted to know, the topic of your studies was something he always expressed an interest in, sweetheart that he was.

One and a half months had passed since that uncomfortable last night at Jungkook's apartment. Jimin remained true to his word, giving you space. Even if it sometimes felt like too much space to you. Absence really did make the heart grow fonder, you think dryly. You missed him. Not the sex, not the secrecy, the person.

You have half a mind to reach out to him but the worry that it would complicate things further stops you. You've spent too long being selfish, you can't continue to do so anymore.

The only thing in your life that doesn't feel uncertain right now is the college degree you've just earned. Your personal life may be a disaster zone but at least one thing fell into place. Already you've been looking at places to intern, taking a special interest in big cities away from here. Often you've caught yourself wondering if the best course of action was to just leave.

"The guys are playing a gig tonight." Hyerin's voice brings your attention to her. You hadn't even noticed her walk into the room. "I'm going."

She sounds reluctant, as if she didn't want to share that information with you. It makes you feel a little guilty, she shouldn't have to walk on eggshells around you or skirt that topic when it comes up. "Oh? Things are better with Namjoon?"

The past month had been...rocky for the couple. Hyerin had made the decision to have his baby and gave him the option to be as involved as he wanted to be. Initially it went exactly as you'd feared, ending in an argument. Lately however they had been spending more time together. You hoped things would work out for them, truly.

"Yeah, I think so." She shrugged. "He's accepted what's happening at least. We're just taking it slow."

"Good," You say, giving her a soft smile. "I'm glad. Where are they playing tonight?"

"That weird underground bar in Gangnam, I can't remember the name. Y'know the one that has the red door? You've been there, I'm sure. It's a one off show for the single release."

You know the exact place she's talking about, Jungkook had told you he loved you for the first time and asked you to be his at that bar. Poor naïve past you, didn't know what she was getting herself into when she enthusiastically said yes.

"Ah, yeah. Well I hope you have fun."

"I'll make sure and give Jungkook my best bitchy glare." She teases. You still hadn't told her about you and Jimin and as far as she was concerned, Jungkook was public enemy number one.

"I appreciate the solidarity, but don't do that. Just treat him normally." You tell her. "Seriously, I've made things weird enough without you joining in!"

"Ok, ok." She laughs. "I'll be nice."

***

The next morning you're awoken by a knock at your bedroom door. With no school or work you'd been counting on sleeping in but the universe had other plans for you apparently. You groggily sit up against the headboard, calling for who is obviously Hyerin to enter.

"Hey," She says quietly as she closes the door behind her. "Did I wake you?"

"Yeah, but it's fine." You say, stifling a yawn. "How was last night?"

"Uh..." She trails off as she sits at the foot of your bed, crossing one leg over the other. "I don't think there's a word to convey how much of a disaster it was."

"A disaster? Why?" You feel an impending sense of dread for some reason.

Hyerin shakes her head. "The entire night was just...chaotic. I know you probably don't want to hear it but it was because of Jungkook. He was a complete mess. I've never seen him so drunk."

Well that figures. He always liked drinking after a set. Hyerin probably just wasn't as used to seeing him sloppy like you were.

"That's standard behaviour for him, unfortunately."

"No y/n. It was bad. Even the guys were concerned." Her eyes are wide with worry. She hesitates and you tense, awaiting whatever terrible thing she's about to say. "He arrived absolutely out of it. His pupils were the size of a dinner plate for god sake. Then when we couldn't find him before they went on he was in a bathroom with some stripper doing lines."

Ouch. A stripper. Already.

"Again, that sounds like Jungkook." You sigh.

"Namjoon says he hasn't seen him sober in a month. He thinks he's messing with hard drugs. Not just fucking around with weed and coke."

"Shit."

"Yeah. I know it isn't easy for you to hear this, but Jungkook seems to be on a one way spiral of self destruction. He could barely hold his drumsticks."

That was unusual for him, you've seen him perform before under the influence and he always nailed it. It was almost comical how functional he could be after too many drinks.

"That's the way he deals with things." You say quietly, inside you squirm with anxiety. You wonder if Jungkook is going even further off the rails because of you, because of what you did to him. "Did someone make sure he got home okay?"

"He disappeared with the stripper. No one can get a hold of him."

You close your eyes for a moment to try and still your thoughts, images of him overdosed on a random couch somewhere flash behind your eyes. "I hope he's alright."

Hyerin nods in agreement. "Me too."

It's silent for a few moments, the weight of the situation feels uncomfortable and heavy. There's an urge in you to try and fix everything but you wouldn't even know where to begin.

"Why didn't you tell me about Jimin?" She asks quietly after a while.

"I, uh..." There's no valid excuse other than to save yourself from embarrassment. It's not exactly something you're proud of.

"I asked where Jimin was last night and Jungkook went crazy. Namjoon had to explain why to me."

"I fucked up." You avoid her gaze, opting to stare at the bedspread instead. "I didn't know how to tell you. I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize to me." Hyerin says softly. "I was just surprised. I never would have thought you would do something like that."

"Me neither." You admit. "It started off as an accident, believe it or not. Remember when they went to Australia for the first time?" She nods. "That's when it began. I'd just had enough of Jungkook cheating on me. Jimin came over to get something and one thing led to another."

"Are you, like, a thing now?"

"No."

"Do you want to be?" She questions.

"I don't know what I want." You sigh. "Really, I deserve nothing. It feels greedy to want anything."

"Don't be so dramatic." She rolls her eyes with a smile. "Everyone makes mistakes. It's not the end of the world."

***

The graduation ceremony brings out the sentimental side in you. In the crowd you see your mom wiping away tears when you receive your diploma and you can't help but feel a little teary yourself. It's a big moment for you.

Afterwards you agree to join some of your fellow classmates for drinks. You make a quick pit stop at home to change but something on your doorstep distracts you for a moment. There's a colourful bouquet of flowers resting against the wood. You pick them up, feeling slightly perplexed.

They're beautiful, it's undeniable. The scent of them invades your nostrils as you search for a card, hoping to get the identity of the sender. The inscription on the paper is short but you know instantly who they're from.

Congratulations, butterfly x

You're not sure how he knew today was your graduation day (you suspect Hyerin has a role in that somewhere) but your glad to hear from him, even if it's indirectly. Jimin is thinking of you.

You take the flowers inside and put them in some water. The decision to call Jimin to say thank you comes naturally, that's what people do when they receive gifts. It's the perfect excuse.

The phone rings a little too long before he picks up and suddenly you feel nervous.

"Hi." He breathes into the phone and the nerves are gone.

masterlist

#bts ff #bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #jimin fanfic #jimin smut #jimin angst #jungle #jungkook #jungkook fanfic #jimin fanfiction #kpop fanfic

[fahhhhq]

Similar but Worlds Apart: Part 4

Fandom: Narcos + Kingsman: The Golden Circle

Pairing: Javier Peña x Fem Reader

WaRnInGs: Cursing.

Summary: Your heart aches for someone who no one has seen for weeks, but when you get new intel about their whereabouts, you’re stunned by what you find in Colombia.

If you’re new here, start hereee: Part uno, Part kinda dos, Part tres.

Note: Shit is going to start going down in this bitch starting next part. And I’ll post them more together since we’re all under lockdown, so timey off = more timey to writey.  Hope You enjoy, xoxo

When you and Javier got to the restaurant, the same lady that had tended to you the last time, just looked at you and Javier with a questioning look. She was confused when she sat you two down in the same table.

“So, what do you recommend this time, Mr. Peña?” you ask as you skim the menu, feeling yourself starving by the second.

You peak up from your menu and he has a small smile on his face, “I pretty much always get the sancocho or the arepas.”

You put the menu down, “I’ll get the arepas since I got the sancocho last time.”

He smiles, “Then I’ll get the same as you.”

“Or am I getting the same as you?” you question.

Javier chuckles and waves over lady. He tells her what we want and orders two beers, too.

You cross your hands and lean against the table. You just stare at him and look at the likeness he has with Jack. Wishing it was Jack there with you eating arepas, but at the same time, you're enjoying Javier’s company.

“So, where are you from?” You ask, trying to pry as much information out of him about his background, as possible.

He smiles, opens the beers that the lady laid on the table, hands one to me, takes a swig from his and then says, “Kingsville, Texas, you?”

You take a drink from your beer and love the way the bubbles and the bitterness graze your throat, “God, that’s a good beer,” you say then laugh. He laughs too and his eyes squint, which makes you feel weak in the knees. “I’m from Southern California, moved a lot, so there’s no specific place.”

“Oh, were your parents in the military?”

“Something like that,” you fake a smile.

He nods, “Ah…”

You take a bigger swig of your beer this time, “Yeah…so do you have siblings?”

“No, just a lot of cousins. And you?” Oh, interesting… you think to yourself.

You shake your head, “No, just me, too. I’d be cool if I had a sibling, though, I wouldn’t be alone.” Shit, you don’t know where that came from, you just shake your head and try to reiterate, “I mean, I wouldn’t have to deal with my parents alone.” You laugh it off.

Javier smiles, “I get it, trust me. I always wanted a brother to do crazy things with, or to fight with. I always got in trouble and I wish I had someone to blame.”

“Oh, that would have been fun! I always got in trouble when I was a kid, so I would just deny, deny, deny,” you laugh.

“And Im guessing your parents never fell for it?” he raises a brow.

“Hey, I can be a good actress…but no, they never fell for it,” you pout, but you notice the way he stares at your lips, like Jack did so many times and then would kiss you and leave you breathless. And you were positive Javier would leave you the same way.

Your food arrives and you both enjoy your arepas in comfortable silence. Every once in a while, you both agree on how good the arepas are and then other times you guys just people watch quietly.

“You OK?” you ask Javier. “We don’t know each other that well but you seem quieter than you normally would be.”

He just smiles and stares down at his food, “Work stuff got me stressed.”

You can’t help but to feel sorry and worried for him, “I mean, you work for the DEA in a country that is consumed by drugs and drug cartels, I would be fucking stressed, too.”

He laughs and his eyes shrink, “Yeah, well I mean you work for a super-secret spy agency, so you must know how it is to deal with assholes like the ones I deal with.”

“Exactly,” you exclaim. “So, is your stress the kind you want to talk about and get it all out or is the kind of stress where you just don’t want to talk about at all?”

Javier chugs the whole beer, “I’m not a huge talker. Especially about work.”

“Ok, so what do you want to talk about?” you ask.

He takes the last bite of his dinner and puts it to the side. He orders two more beers and looks at you, “What are you really doing in Colombia?”

Your heart skips a beat. His question catches you off guard, but you decide to be honest, “I’m looking for my partner. He went missing three weeks ago.”

Javier looks at you curiously, “Your partner? You mean from the super-secret spy agency?”

You chuckled lightly, “Yep.”

He narrows his eyes, “You really don’t want to tell me what you're doing in Colombia?”

You laugh some more and drink the rest of your beer then open the new one, “You don’t trust a lot of people, do you?”

“Not really. Its what I’ve trained for my whole adult life.”

“That must be tiresome, to be on guard all the time, wondering if they have bad intentions.”

His eyebrows burrow, “A lot of people have a lot to hide. Its my job to uncover whatever it is they’re hiding.”

“Did you ever think that maybe people aren’t as bad as you make them out to be. That maybe they’re not hiding any bad intentions, and are actually being honest?”

He grabs his beer and avoids your stare. It looks like he’s thinking over what you said. “In my experience, everyone I've met has had something to hide. Maybe its not as bad as the previous, but they still surprise me.”

“Not everyone has something hiding under their sleeves, bud. Maybe if you’d trust more people, you wouldn’t have to be a ho who sleeps with random girls because you can’t trust someone long enough to have a serious relationship with,” you say. And yeah, it might seem like you're being a hypocrite, but when did you lie? Until that moment, you had been honest about your job and why you were being in Colombia, except for the fact that the person who was missing had a damn twin, but you couldn’t control that fact.

Javier seems to be taken back by your statement. He lifts his eyebrows in surprise and chugs the rest of his beer with purpose.

You reach over the table and grab his hand, he’s surprised by your action, “I’m not lying, everything I told you about why I’m here is true. You can trust me.”

He rolls his eyes, still serious, “Fine, but I don’t like that you called me a ho.”

You laugh, “You are though, I know one when I see one.”

He chuckles, drinking the rest of his second beer, “Whatever.” He motions for another beer to a waitress. “So, what happened to this partner of yours?”

You think to yourself; you mean your twin brother who even has the same moustache?

You finish the rest of your beer and then you realize that if guys continue to drink the way that you are, you're going to spill the beans about Jack. But at the same time, you needed this. You hadn’t “let loose” it seemed in so long since Jack went missing, so relaxing and having a regular chit-chat with someone who looked exactly like him, how could you not want to continue to drink.

You look at him and try to tell him the whole truth, but with some white lies, “My partner went on what was supposed to be a simple mission, yes with dangerous people, but Jack, he’s not someone to get beat so fast and easy…we just don’t know what happened to him. One moment he’s talking to us over his earpiece and then, nothing.”

He lifts his eyebrows in surprise, “You're actually telling me the truth?”

You just smile, “I don’t like to lie, unless I’m working, but I’m being honest, Javier.”

He crosses his arms over his chest and sits back, “Why are you trying to convince me that you’re not lying?”

“So that you can trust me and not be so closed off when we hangout,” you say. “I mean, I don’t know how long I’m going to be here, but we can be friends in the meantime, and you don’t have to have your walls up so high that Mount Everest looks like the wall of connect-four.”

“Ok, I believe you,” he laughs. “So, your partner, Jack is it? How long has he been missing? Maybe I can help.”

You feel your eyes bulge, “No, don’t do that, please. You already have enough going on and I don’t want to burden you with my nonsense.”

“Doesn’t seem like nonsense if you're in Colombia and out of your element.”

You wave him off and wink, “Trust me, Agent Scotch, I got this.”

He laughingly throws his hands up in a protective manner, “Fine, Agent Vino, but I’m here if you need any help.”

“Thank you.”

After you both finish your fourth beers, you decide to head home. It’s past midnight when you both get to your building.

You speak first, “Well, thank you for taking me to dinner. I seriously didn't know it was so late, you saved me.”

“I saved you from starving to death.”

“Starving to death is a bit extreme, maybe from getting a really bad headache and getting ‘hangry,’ but dead, no,” you declare.

He leans against the doorframe of your now open door, “You always have an answer for everything, huh?”

“Of course, I wouldn’t be the agent I am if I wasn’t quick on my feet,” you feel weird saying that you're an agent because you're not completely sure he believes you.

“Right,” he says smiling, crossing his arms over his chest, his leather jacket stretching a bit because of his muscles. “I’ll leave you to continue to work or go to sleep. Dinner tomorrow?”

You feel your cheeks get a bit hot, “Yeah, we can do dinner tomorrow, and this time I’ll be ready.”

“Ok, goodnight,” He just gives a small smile and walks to his apartment. But you don’t go inside until you check him out and make sure that he doesn’t stand outside your door and listen to the call that you were going to make. Nice ass, you think before closing the door.

You walk over to your makeshift office in the kitchen and grab your cellphone. You dial and wait.

“Statesman Kentucky, the best Bourbon Whiskey in the world,” a young woman’s voice answers.

“Get me Ale,” you say.

After a pause there’s an answer, “Ginger.”

“Ginger, I need you to look someone up for me,” you say.

“Go,” Ginger responds.

“Javier Peña, he’s DEA.”

“Give a second here, ok, yes, Peña, born in Kingsville, Texas, went to college at Texas A&I University where he studied sociology and psychology, he was then hired as a Deputy Sheriff by the Webb County Sheriff’s office in Laredo, seven years later the DEA hired Peña as a Special Agent for the office in Austin.”

“Is that it?” You ask.

“Hmm, yeah that’s all there is. What am I supposed to be looking for, Y/N?”

“Just information. Does it show his picture?”

“Let me see…” then you hear a gasp. “What?! Wait, so Jack is going by another identity?”

You shake your head like if she can see you, “No, that’s his brother, Ginger.”

“What the fuck!” that was the first time you had ever heard Ginger Ale curse.

“Ginger, what the fuck am I going to do?” In that moment you just want to leave Javier behind and forget that you found him. In that moment you wish Jack was there and you could both go home and forget about all that had happened. But you couldn’t. 

You were in it, deep in it.

Taggity-Tags: @shikin83 @otherthingsinhead @batata-elegante @fleurdemiel145 @maryan028 @igotmadskills @just-add-butter @ghostofthebarricade @fatbottomedcurls @readsalot73 @stxriss 

#agent vino x javier peña #reader x javier peña #javier peña x reader #narcos #Pedro daddy Pascal #Take meeee #pedro pascal #max lord #agent whiskey #reader x agent whiskey #statesman #Kingsman

[50-percent-winchester-sister]

The Emo Phase

THIS IS MY FIRST SISTER WINCHESTER ONE SHOT PLEASE DONT HATE IT I CRIII

Dean: 26

Sam: 22

Y/N: 15

When you were 15, that’s when you had an emo phase, and Sam and Dean were NOT pleased

You had a short temper and a prissy attitude and they were not having any of it. You wore all black and according to Dean ‘slutty’ clothes, which made you more mad at him

You snuck out all the time and each time they got tired of you so Sam grounded you for 2 months

“What? You can't ground me what the fu-”

“I think I just did. Room. Now.”

And when Sam grounds you, you know you can't get out of it easily. Even so, instead of being a good kid and saying sorry, you slammed and locked your door.

You were so mad you balled your hand into a fist and shattered your mirror and threw the stuff that was on your dresser on the floor. Let’s just say, your room didn’t deserve the things you did to it.

About an hour or so later your energy drained because you were mad at Sam. Mad at Dean. Mad at yourself

You cried for hours and when you woke up you looked like a mess with red puffy eyes

Until it hit you. You woke yourself up, Dean didn’t come in and call you Princess, he hasn’t in a while…

You opened your door and walked to the kitchen doorframe to see Sam and Dean at the kitchen table, Sam on his laptop and Dean drinking a beer looking at the newspaper.

You just stood there silently for a minute until you decided to walk past them to get something to drink

Dean looks up and sees you saying “There’s our little ball of sunshine” sarcastically

“Bite me” “Hey I’m not the one who got grounded by Sammy”

“Whatever don’t talk to me” You grab yourself a glass of milk and go to your room to get dressed for school.

You walk into your room and “Wow...Did I do all of that?” You were so filled with adrenaline and hate you blocked out most of what happened last night after you got grounded

You got dressed and went into the kitchen to achieve your backpack, glasses and the ribbon your mom got you.

“Y/n your rooms a mess you’re gonna clean it up when you get back fro-”

“Yeah no shit, it's not like I’m gonna keep it that way, Sam”

You didn’t want to stay there any longer and decided to walk to school. Your school is a few miles away and one of your brothers usually takes you, but you could bare being near them right now.

You were already 20 minutes late to first hour and frankly, you didn’t give two flying fucks

You decided to skip 1st hour because honestly they're’s no point on going anymore

You skipped second hour because you hated the teacher and skipped third hour because that teacher always gives you a hard time.

In fourth hour (the hour you FINALLY decided to come to class) you got sent to the councilors office

“Are you Y/n m/n Winchester dear?”

“Yeah, why?”

“The principals have contacted your guardians to come to this school to pick you up, you’re suspended for 4 days”

“Wait for WHAT? What did I even do??”

“We’ll talk about that once your guardians are here”

Your back is turned away from the door and once you heard that door open you KNOW you’re done for. For the first time in a while, you’re scared to be near your brothers.

“Are you two Sam and Dean Winchester?”

“Yes we are, hello”

Sam on your left and Dean on your right, you can't leave even if you tried

“We have called you in here today to inform you that y/n has been suspended for 4 days due to breaking Sabrina Gillie’s nose and breaking Callie Monoys’ arm”

'Oh right… that’s what I did' you thought while trying to remain calm

It was silent for a few moments which felt like forever

“Thank you so much for telling us we’ll take the right disciplinary action”

You, Sam and Dean, walked out of the office and were walking through the hallways to get to the Impala.

You usually like quiet but right now you were going insane.

You hated the silence, it was digging into your skin like needles

You, Sam and Dean, were in the impala when the silence broke in 3...2...1...

"Y/n, what the hell were you thinking?" Dean says with venom in his voice

"Yeah okay, ask me what I was thinking and not what they were thinking, sure do that"

"Son of a bitch y/n I know you think you're 'so' cool now but dammit come on, you broke a girl's nose and another girl's arm"

"Fucking hell Dean it's not like I 'wanted' to do it, they deserved it!"

"No more out of you Y/n, once we get in the bunker you're going straight to your room and staying there, you got me?"

"No," you say like a calm but dark undertone.

"Excuse me?" Sam says looking back at you

"I said no, me, Claire and her friend Alex are hanging out tonight at Claire's house"

"The hell you are," Sam says "You're still grounded, missy"

"Do NOT call me missy you asshole, and screw you I can just sneak out"

"I'll lock your door"

"I can go out the window"

"you're room is upstairs"

"I have my ways, Sam"

"THAT'S IT!! Y/n, I'm tired of you acting like just because you're our sister you can get away with the shit you're doing!" Sam says as he wipes his face with his hands

"That's not-"

" No! I don't want to do this but Dean, you think we should send her to Jody's for a few days?"

"WHAT?" You say in a piercing, sinister scream enough to make Dean stop the car and look back at you

"I am NOT going to Jody's! You can't make me, Sam!"

"If you don't want to go to Jody's, then all this attitude of yours has gotta stop, okay?"

You three finally are at the bunker and you get out of the Impala before it fully stops and head inside and ran up to your room. You stayed in there for a good two hours cleaning up, but its because you wanted to, not because of Sam and Dean. It's 7:25 pm when you heard Dean call your name, reluctantly, you did as told. "Me and Sammy are going on a hunt, you need anything while we're out?"

All you did was look down and shake your head no and walk back to your room. no "Ill miss you two" or "Be safe, call me and ill be there," just....silence, and honestly Dean didn't know if he should be nervous or not.

You turned your phone off because honestly, you didn't want to be bothered by anyone, all by yourself with your thoughts. 'Wow I'm such a disappointment to them' 'Im such an awful sister, they want to send me away to Jody' 'God why can't I just do shit right for once?"

They left a note on the kitchen counter saying they will be back by later tonight so you thought of making them some pie, Karjalanpiirakka. Karelian Pie that Claire taught you how to make a couple of years ago

When it was finished you decided to clean up the kitchen, library and living room while you still had the time by yourself. When you were done, saying you were happy for yourself is an understatement, you were damn proud! It was 2 am by the time you settled down and watched Spiderman-Homecoming on the big tv screen.

About an hour later Sam and Dean enter the bunker and looked honest to god shocked on how clean it was.

"Sammy? Do you see this shit? Are we high?" 'Yeah I see it, you think she's okay?"

They see you sleeping on the couch, sitting up and Sam walks up to you and wakes you up, he says "Why don't you sleep on your own bed bugaboo, it's more comfortable there" "Its alright Sammy, I was trying to stay awake for when you two came back home to make sure you two were alright"

A smile was dragged across Sam's face when you said that, he like this, he liked this y/n, the y/n you used to be before all...this happened

You walked over to Dean and asked if he was okay and he said only a few manageable cuts. you nodded and walked to your room to sleep.

When you left Sam said to Dean "You think that Jody trick worked?" "That was a trick?" "Of course it was Dean, I know she loves Jody but even if she doesn't like being away from us for that long" "well I guess we'll see tomorrow."

When you woke up you ran downstairs to see your brothers in the kitchen, Sam making breakfast and Dean at the kitchen table talking to Sam. Sam notices you and smiles, "Mornin Sunshine. since you're still grounded you're getting waffles instead of pancakes." You look at him for a second and start to laugh. He looks at Dean, then back to you, "What?" "That's the best you got? pfft come on Sammy you can discipline me harder" you say during laughing fits. "Okay then, no breakfast?" "That's more like it"

You start to walk to your room when you turn around and asked Sam "Hey Sam?" "Yeah?" "I-" You realize if you asked him, you would cry in front of him, and you don't want that. "I- Nevermind its nothing. I'll be in the training room if you two need me" You turn around to walk into the training room and start working out. an hour and thirty minutes later you turn around to see Sam with his arms folded leaning on the door frame

"Oh, hey," you say out of breath

"Hey yourself. What were you wanting to say to me a while ago?" You looked a bit shaken up but you let out an "Its nothing I said, don't worry 'bout it." Sam looks a little bit worried but with everything that's going on with you, he needs you to talk. "Come on bugaboo, let's talk and Dean doesn't have to know unless you want him to" "Sam its nothing okay? Drop it" "y/n-" "Sam, dammit I said I don't want to talk" Sam jumped at the sudden snap of your voice. "I'll be in the library if you want to talk"

You're in your room doing fuck all since Dean took your phone and your tv when you hear a knock on your door.

"Its Dean can I come in?" "......Yeah"

Dean comes in and sees you laying down on the floor with red eyes.

"Talk to me, why did you go all 'hulk' on Sammy?"

"No, I don't want to"

"Sucks to be you, Princess, you don't have a choice"

"The hell I don't" you sit up and turn to him "You can't make me Dean"

"The hell I cant" mocking you "I'm not leaving till you decide to make this into a chick flick moment"

"I thought you hate chick flick moments"

"Yeah I do, now talk y/n"

"Dean I cant"

"What do you mean you cant?"

"Dean I-, I just cant"

"So you want Sam to take you to Jody's and keep you there?"

".....No"

"Then talk princess"

You high in defeat "It's complicated"

"Well you better find the right words hon, or its gonna be a long night"

Dean walks away and you feel like you just left earths void.

Dinner was grossly quiet, and you knew it was because of you. After dinner, Sam and Dean left to go to the library to read up on some lore and thirty minutes later you walk up to the library door frame and just stood there for a solid minute and they didn't notice you. "Hey." They jump at your voice and look at you "Hey y/n" they both said in unison. "I just wanna say sorry for the way I've been acting lately. I've been a total dick towards you guys when I know you two are just looking out for me. I bet I was hell to raise and pulling this shit is just adding more stress to you guys"

They both had a face of both shock and...relief?

"Y/n, come here," Sam says. You hesitate but you do so anyway "You have no idea how happy I am that you said that" He gives you a big moose hug and you hugged him back. "And yes you were absolute hell to raise" "Dean!" "What? She said it not me" You laugh and let go of Sam to hug Dean. "Sammy?" "Yes?" "No Jody's?" "No Jody's" you right in relief. "Not unless you start acting like miss priss again" You fastly stare at Dean "Call me that again and I'll show you a miss priss" Sam and Dean both laugh. "Am I still grounded?" Sam laughs and says "You got suspended of course you are" You frown and that's when Sam said "Two weeks." You turn to see him and smiled brightly. You start walking away when you say "God I love you boys" under your breath, but nevertheless they heard you and you know they'll be teasing you about it for weeks

#sister!winchester #sister!reader #sam winchester #dean winchester #supernatural #sam and dean #dean and sam #sam x sister!reader #dean x sister!reader

[captainillogical]

Devil’s Ballroom Ch.8

A year after the events from the earth’s final attack, Little Homeworld is finally complete, and there’s a new jazz bar where gems and humans mingle and drink. - As you’re typing back a reply, someone pulls the stool out next to you and takes a seat. You see a sliver of pink out of the corner of your eye as you try not to actually Look. Oh god. It’s her. God can’t help us now.

Spinel/Reader

collab with my lovely wife @firstofficertightpants​

(i’m sorry. i have terrible chapter pacing skills so the next one will be the last, not this one. thanks for all of ur patience p: ) 

Immediately you accidentally elbow Alex in the face as you try to get out of his grip, and he yells out in pain and drops you onto the ground.

"Wait! SPINEL!" You shout and run towards the direction she went, but you don’t see her anywhere. "SPINEL!!!" You shout again, eyes frantically roaming in every direction around for her, a couple of people stop to stare at you. She’s much faster than you, and could be leagues away by now.

You can't believe she would just run like that, without explanation. She was staring at you and Alex like.. did she seriously think that you and Alex.. oh god. She thought you were with Alex. 

Okay. You try not to panic as you stand there, awkwardly. You feel a hand on your shoulder.

"What the hell was that?" Alex says beside you. You can't speak for a moment, and when you do, your voice comes out hoarse.

"Er.. I think some horrible misunderstanding just happened." You say, defeated. You look up at him, and you're trying to not be visibly upset. He looks down at you, and makes a face.

"That was her? She could've said hi, sheesh.. she even left cookies here." He shrugs, looking at the spilled cookies on the ground.

"Dude. How are you so fucking stupid." You say, nearly about to smack him again. He gives you a confused look. "Are you shitting me? She came to give me those cookies in thanks for yesterday, and what does she see? You kissing all over my face." 

He still gives you a blank look.

"Ohhhh my god. You are such a fucking moron." You retort, staring at him for several solid seconds until a look of sudden realization hits his facial expressions.

“Oh. OHHHHHHHHHHHH.” He covers his mouth, and has the audacity to look mortified.

“Yeah.” You cross your arms. “Thanks for that.” 

“I uh.. man, I just wanted some Y/N love, I’m sorry. I just got so carried away.”

“I’m pretty sure she thinks I’m like, romantically involved with you.. Oh god what if she thinks I like men?” You cover your face in your hands, groaning into them. “I never told her that I liked just girls..”

“You told her about your crush on Harper though? What about that?” He raises his eyebrows in question.

“Yeah but I never told her about any of the other shit, and I haven’t exactly like.. given her any signals..”

“But you flirt with her all the time! And she flirts back! I know, because you’ve told me everything, multiple times.” He bends down and scoops up the container, and picks up the cookies and places them all back inside.

“Alex, I really hate to break this to you, but girls flirt with each other all the time. Most of the time, it’s over compliments, and sometimes it SEEMS genuine, but really, they’re just being nice.” You say. “Unless you’re super bold, with girls you basically have to be frank with them about your feelings and intentions for them to realize you’re serious. I myself prefer to kinda be sure that the other person likes me back, before I stick my neck out, you know? Because getting the ‘Oh, I thought we were just friends’ shit fucking hurts.”

“I’m pretty sure she likes you, dude.” He says to you like you’re an idiot.

“I’m not so sure about that.” You say, because you refuse to believe anything unless the cold hard facts are slapping you in the face.

“For someone so smart, how are you so stupid?” He sniffs one of the cookies, and looks like he’s contemplating taking a bite. You scoff. “You know what? Don’t answer that. It doesn’t matter. My point is, even I can tell she likes you.”

"Coming from you, that means nothing to me." He immediately looks up, completely offended. “What? I mean, seriously. Do I have to remind you of all of our middle school and high school years? That should explain itself.” 

“Okay when you put it that way, YEAH, I was stupid, but this is different. This is me absorbing someone ELSE’S love life, and even I’m not that much of a fool.” He sighs, and mournfully tosses the cookies into the bin closest to you. “I think you need to like, give her a call or something and explain yourself. She looked really upset.” 

“Yeah, I..” You pause for a second to pick your screwdriver back up. You don’t even want to work anymore. “You’re right. I’m just nervous.” 

“Just do it before you overthink it.” He replies.

“Ugh, okay.” You pull out your phone, swipe over to your contacts, and press the call button on Spinel’s name. Immediately, it goes to voicemail.

Of course.

You leave a voicemail for her to call you back as soon as she hears this, and you also shoot her a text.

“She’s not answering.” You say.

“Of course she’s not, I mean, I wouldn’t either. Give her a while and try again later, she probably just needs some time.” He says, and also pulls out his phone, typing something on it real quick. “Also, give me a minute, mom needs to call me about something for tomorrow.” He steps a couple feet away from you to take the call.

You stare at your phone, and for the first time in a long time, you really don’t know what to fucking do other than just stand there. What if she’s so upset, she never talks to you again? Will she give you a chance to hear you out? And are you ready to talk about your feelings with her? 

Lord.

You haven’t really thought about them too much yourself, if you’re going to be honest. You’ve been keeping this all super casual in your mind, because it feels irrational to grow feelings for someone this quickly, considering you’ve known her for less than 2 weeks. But.. you admit, the more you push the thoughts away, the more you understand that you might like her a lot more than you originally considered, and denying them will just cause you issues like that one time when you were 19.

You sigh out loud. Off to the side you can hear Alex arguing with his mother about some errands she wants him to run tomorrow, and for a brief moment you consider just going home, but then remember that not even Mr. Smiley can cover the rest of the shift. You have a good two hours left, you can survive, hopefully. You make yourself busy with fixing the part you were previously working on - but you’re having a hard time concentrating. After a couple minutes, Alex taps on the side of the wall, and you peek your head out to look at him.

“Look, I hate to do this to you right now, but mom wants me to go grab a few things from her office, and pick up an order from the print place before it closes.” He pushes his curly dark hair out of his eyes, half leaning on the wall next to you. “I can probably be back by the time you’re done with your shift.”

“Hmm.. alright.” You mumble, trying to keep your mind on more positive things. He leans closer to you, stretches out his arm, and pokes you on the cheek.

“Don’t hyperfocus on this. Shit will be fine, you just gotta give her some time to get back to you, okay hun?” He gives your cheek a little love smack and stands straight, heading out already. You watch him go.

“Super easy for you to say..” You say to yourself, and busy your hands.

Most of the rest of the shift passes quietly, and you receive no messages from anyone. You hate that you can’t do anything, not really, so you send Spinel another text. She still hasn’t seen the other one, and it’s been nearly two hours.

Y/N: Can we talk? Please.

You aren’t in the mood to text anyone else, so you put your phone back into your pocket, and start all of your closing duties. The next twenty minutes goes by in a heartbeat, the crowds of tourists long since dissipated. There isn’t a lot to do. Once you clock out and grab your things from the breakroom, you feel your phone vibrate so you pull it out quickly to see who it is. You try and fail not to feel disappointed that it’s just Alex.

Alex: she wrapped me up in some other shit so like, im runnin hella late

Alex: im sorry

Alex: its gonna be a while, ill let you know when im done and ill just come over to ur place

Alex: if thats ok

You type out a couple replies to him, and sigh out loud. It’s for the best really. You don’t exactly want him to talk to you about all this stuff right now anyway. You head out, lock up the place, and walk in the general direction of your home.

By the time you’re home and settled, Alex has given you an update, and it’s been nearly four hours since you saw Spinel with no response. You’re seriously starting to worry, because she’s never not replied to your messages like this. You go to send her another text, and realize that she still hasn’t opened any of your messages. You send her another inquiry, and pop up your chat with Steven.

Y/N: Steven.

Y/N: I need you to answer asap.

You see that he’s online, and you wait for an answer. It only takes him a minute or two to get back to you.

Steven: Hey Y/N, what’s up?

Y/N: Have you talked to Spinel in the last couple of hours?

Steven: Not since this morning, why?

Y/N: Can you call her just to check up on her? I’m worried about something.

Steven: Yeah hold on.

You wait for several long minutes for him to get back to you.

Steven: Her phone’s just going to voicemail, which is pretty weird. Maybe she accidentally let it die? I’ll let you know when she answers back.

Steven: Are you guys okay?

Y/N: Uhh, I’ll get back to you on that.

Steven: Hmm, okay. 

You go to lay on your couch face down, and scream into the cushions.

Apparently you fall asleep that way, because the next thing you know, you have to peel your drool covered face off the couch cushion. You blink away your sleep-heavy eyes, and blearily check your phone. It’s 5am.

The only message you’ve received is one from Alex saying he stopped by, but left since he saw you were sleeping. Okay wow, he could’ve woken you up into a better sleeping position. Your neck feels like shit. 

You’re trying to ignore the growing feeling of dread in your stomach, pointedly not thinking about how Spinel hasn’t texted you back yet, and how long it’s been. You grab a glass of water from the fridge, trudge up the stairs into your bedroom, and flop on your bed. You pass out again nearly instantly.

When you wake up again, the sun is glaring into your window, and you groan. You roll over and pull the covers over your head. Fuck the sun today. You grab your phone from your nightstand, and notice it’s almost 1pm, the fuck? Why the fuck did you sleep so long? You look at all your notifications, and pretend that you’re not looking for a specific one from someone. 

Spinel still hasn’t texted you back, and STILL hasn’t seen any of the messages you’ve sent her. You are starting to panic a little, so you shoot Steven a message.

Y/N: She hasn’t said anything to me at all, has she answered you?

You message your dad and friends back while waiting a few minutes for Steven to reply. It takes him a few minutes to get back to you while you're laying in bed.

Steven: Her phone is still off, and she hasn't replied to anything I've sent her. I'm gonna ask Lapis to check up on her since they live in the same building. I'll get back to you when I get an answer.

It's been like twenty hours since you've seen her, and you're worried. There's no point moping around though, so you get up and get dressed for the day. You make and eat breakfast, even if you don't normally. You need a distraction from your thoughts, so you give your dad a call to check up on him, and ask him when he's coming home this week. He talks to you about his long days in meetings after meetings, the silly shit he got up to with a coworker last night after drinking, and the new hobby he's thinking of picking up when he gets back home. You guys talk for a long while, and maybe it's something you really needed, because you momentarily forget about what you were so worried with in the first place, until your phone buzzes. It's ringing actually, and your phone screen lights up with Steven's name. You tell your dad you've got to go to take this other call, and answer Steven. You sit there, phone in hand for a moment, before putting it to your ear.

"Y/N?" You hear him ask, although a bit muffled.

"Yeah. Anything?" You reply, trying to keep the nervousness out of your voice.

"She's uh.. She's on homeworld with the Diamonds right now? Maybe they worked something out with whatever event they were planning." He says into the receiver, completely casual like this is no big deal. Like that answer didn't just shatter your morale.

"Hm, okay. I appreciate you telling me this." You want to hang up and cry. 

"Why didn't Spinel tell you she was going? I mean, she doesn't need to let me know since I go back to homeworld frequently.. are you guys okay?"

"Uhhhhhhhhhh." You say, unable to form an answer that isn't too revealing. "I'm not sure. But I'll let you know if anything changes."

"You know you can talk to me, right?" He says, gently. You appreciate that he cares, but it's best if he doesn't interfere.

"I know. Thank you, Steven." You reply, holding back any emotion that will give you away.

"I'll talk to you soon, okay? See you, Y/N." You say goodbye as well, and hang up.

You sit at your dining table for several solid minutes without moving, staring blankly at your phone, mind swirling with thoughts.

Okay. Alright. You can do this.

You refuse to cry, and you pinch your arm to get the prickling feeling away from the edges of your eyes. Fuck. Okay. 

So she just.. left. She left, when she was fighting with the Diamonds literally yesterday about something awful they said to her, so awful that she had an emotional breakdown over it, and couldn't even TALK about it with you afterwards. 

She left for homeworld to escape you. 

You, specifically.

Because of a misunderstanding.

You probably sit there for a good twenty minutes absorbing everything, weighing the gravity of the situation. Afterwards, you get up and distract yourself with chores. You refuse to put any more thought into this, and just figure you'll wait. 

At around 6pm, Alex comes over, and the two of you play Minecraft for the rest of the night, and he pointedly doesn't ask about Spinel at all. You're thankful that he's here in person, for once, because you don't know what kind of stupid shit you'd do without him here.

He spends the night and crashes on your couch, and you lay awake for most of the night, restless.

When you wake up, Alex has coffee and oatmeal ready for you, which is pretty funny because he never makes food. He's usually awful at it. He's sitting at the table sipping his coffee and drawing in his sketchbook, and he looks up when you make your presence known.

"Wow, you kinda look like shit my guy." He says, taking another sip of his coffee, and setting the mug down.

"Thanks. Had insomnia pretty bad last night.." You trail off and move to grab a mug from the cabinet and pour yourself some coffee. It's a black coffee only kind of day. 

You sit down on the opposite side from him, and slowly drink your coffee. It smells good. You're worried Spinel hates you and never wants to see you again. You pull the bowl of oatmeal towards you and take a bite of lukewarm mush.

"This is kind of awful but thanks." You say as you shovel more into your mouth, and consider adding more brown sugar to this.

"I ain't no Gordon Ramsay, but I try." He doesn't look at you as he shades the back leg of the deer he's sketching. You watch him bite his tongue in concentration, and you take another sip of coffee. It's kind of burnt tasting, but whatever. You've had worse. "What do you want to do today, anyway?" 

"Mmm." You eat another bite of oatmeal. "Can you please pick? Cuz I'm kinda braindead right now and I don't really feel like concentrating." He looks at you with mild concern.

"Last time I got to pick, you banned me from picking out what we do for a solid year." He furrows his eyebrows, twisting his pencil in hand.

"Yeah, well.. I don't really care right now." You shovel more food into your mouth.

"Fine. You said so, okayyyy, so no complaining later." He rolls his eyes and huffs, pencil scratching against the paper. Your phone buzzes several times on the table, and you reluctantly grab it. One message from dad, and.. two from Steven. You open up Steven’s messages first.

Steven: What did you do?

Steven: She doesn't want to come home.

Your stomach feels like lead. Alex notices you immediately.

"Uh. What's wrong?" He asks, leaning over. You tilt your phone away from him and you can feel the tears coming. You swallow, trying to get your face to cooperate.

“Um..” You feel your voice wavering, so you take a steadying breath. Looking down at your phone again, you struggle to form any kind of coherent words at all. You push your phone over to Alex, he reads what's on your screen, and looks back over to you with a serious face.

“For real? Are you kidding me?” He says, and you can hear the frustration in his voice. “I’m gonna give her a piece of my mind.”

“No,” The words finally find you. “Let me deal with this, please.” You give him a half hearted smile, and pull your phone back to yourself. With shaky hands, you text Steven back.

Y/N: Listen, I didn’t do anything, but..

Y/N: I’d prefer to get this sorted with her in person.

Y/N: I don’t want to play the messenger game

Y/N: I want her to hear it from me.

You don’t have to wait too long for his reply.

Steven: Okay well, I don’t know how well that’s going to work

Steven: Considering she refuses to talk to me about any of it

Steven: Let me know if you end up wanting me to do anything?

Steven: And I’ll message you if anything happens on my end.

Y/N: I appreciate that. Thanks.

You sigh and look up at Alex, who’s watching you with his chin in hand, leaning on the table.

“Anything?” He inquires.

“Nothing.” You say.

“Well, let me clean up the mess I made and let's go out. Mom let me have the car today, so we can go wherever. You said I can choose and no take-backsies, just give me a few minutes, alright?” He stands up and takes the both of your plates to the kitchen, and you watch him for a moment before deciding to get up and get dressed. 

You head up to your bedroom and open your closet, rummaging around for something cozy. You grab a soft long sleeve shirt, and sweatpants, because who gives a fuck honestly. You’re looking inbetween all your sweaters for your favorite one that you’d like to wear today, before realizing that Spinel still has it. Instantly, your eyes fill with tears at the reminder, and you let yourself cry quietly in frustration where no one can see you. 

After a few minutes, you wash your face in the bathroom and get dressed, settling for a different sweater. You take a couple deep breaths, and head downstairs to Alex.

You spend the rest of the day with Alex, and he takes the both of you to Empire City to browse the mall and window shop, and he buys the both of you dinner. You feel like he’s being extra sweet to make you feel better and you appreciate him so much for it, but Spinel’s on your mind literally all day and you can’t distract yourself enough. He gives you a big hug after dropping you off at home, and before leaving he makes sure that you’re okay. You’re not, not really, but he helped you not spiral further downwards today.

The next day you only work a half shift, so you get to sleep in and you take full advantage of it. It has now been three days since Spinel disappeared with no word since, and you’re beside yourself with worry. But you can’t let this stop you living your day to day life, so you do what you do best and keep on with your routine.

The fourth day goes quickly as you work a full shift, and you’ve got quite a few things to do before your dad gets home tomorrow. You’re excited to see him, as he’s been gone for nearly three weeks now. The house will be back to normal, and way less lonely.

Your dad comes home the fifth day and you spend the entirety of it with him, and you don’t think about Spinel at all. The both of you go to the movies, and then to the beach to have a relaxing afternoon as family bonding time. When you guys head home, you make him his favorite steak and potatoes and he talks about all of the things he had to do and how much he missed your company while he was gone. You think he notices that your mood has slightly been off today, but he doesn't ask about it.

The sixth day, Steven sends you a text about her still not being home, and you wonder why you even bothered opening the message. At this point you’re no longer despondent, you’re now just frustrated with the growing feeling of anger building inside you.

By the tenth day, you’re rightfully pissed. You gave her more than enough time to get over whatever feelings she felt - and she’s not taking any of your feelings into consideration. She left you to deal with the aftermath of what she assumed to be true, and never even gave you the chance to explain yourself. You haven’t sent her a text since that last one you sent over a week ago, and you think you’ll send her one more.

Y/N: Whenever (or IF, I guess) you decide to pop back in on earth, I’d like to have a chat. :)

Steven hasn’t said anything much in the last week, either. You kind of feel like he’s avoiding you because of this, but it doesn’t matter now. If she never wants to come back, that’s on her. 

Two more days go by - pretty uneventfully. You spend most of your time at work, or playing minecraft with Alex and the occasional Harper when she’s actually in a motel versus camping. The two of them haven’t asked about Spinel at all - and you know they’ve talked about it extensively in private. You’re secretly relieved that you don’t have to talk about her, though.

Two weeks pass, and you give up entirely. Life goes on.

One of these late afternoons you’re lying in bed after work and texting your friends, and for a moment you think about shooting Spinel a last message. You don’t think she’ll come back to earth at this point, but you want your sweater back if she ever visits. You swipe over to your chat with her to let her know this, and your eyes glance at the ‘seen’ icon at the bottom, timestamp dated nearly 36 hours ago.

Huh.

Wait. What the fuck.

You sit there for a moment, frozen in shock. Shock that quickly turns into boiling anger, and you find yourself texting Steven faster than you realize.

Y/N: So she comes back and you say nothing, yeah?

Y/N: Remind me to not do you any favors for a while.

Eyes stinging, you go back over to shoot Spinel an angry message, but before you can even type out half a sentence, Steven rapidly texts you back.

Steven: Hold on for a second, okay?

Steven: Let me explain something.

You don’t really care at this point.

Y/N: nah man.

You get up from bed, pocket your phone, and waltz downstairs. You put on a sweater, toe on the nearest flip flops, and head out the front door. Dad’s at work currently, so you lock the door and head over to little homeworld. You walk briskly over to the bar you met Spinel at, and after a small hold up with the bouncer, head in and move directly to the counter, facing Bismuth.

“Hey Bis,” You say to her, and she glances over to you from her current patron, and smiles at you.

“Y/N! It’s been a minute. How’ve you been?” She replies, facing you.

“I’ve been alright,” You lean a bit over the bar. “I actually just have a question, if you don’t mind.” Bismuth looks at you inquisitively, and you continue. “What’s Spinel’s address? She never gave it to me.” You smile sweetly at her.

“Hold on, let me get a pen and some paper.” She says as she sets down her glass, and grabs a pen and some receipt paper from the register. You watch her scribble something down, and she hands it to you.

“Bis, I ever tell you that you’re the best?” You take the piece of paper from her hand.

“Only once,” She grins. “But I could stand to hear it again.” You laugh at that, and pocket the note.

“Thanks for this. I’ll pay you back later, promise.” You wink at her, and turn to leave. You hear her chuckle and pick the glass back up from the counter.

“I’ll keep you to that!” You hear as you leave the building, pulling out the note again to glance at the address.

It’s over a mile away, and you figure now or never, and walk towards the general direction of her place. You try and fail on calming your nerves on the near 30 minute walk, and by the time you get to her apartment building, you’ve worked yourself up into a whirlwind of emotions. Also you’ve pointedly ignored your phone this entire time, and you’re pretty sure you’ve missed 5 calls and dozens of texts, but you knew that if you looked at any of it, you’d lose face and chicken out.

Spinel’s apartment is on the 9th floor, and you marvel at the technology side of the building for a bit. These gems really knew how to build stuff. You take the elevator up, and once you’re on the floor, you take a sharp left to the odd numbers side of the building. You reach her door and stop, almost touching the frame to knock on it. Although it’s pretty quiet in the building, you can hear a faint voice, or voices, coming from inside her apartment if you listen closely enough.

You take a deep breath, and let it out. You take another three, and consider leaving altogether. You steel your nerves, lift your arm, and knock on her door frame twice.

You think you hear the voice quiet down as you stand there, waiting. Several seconds go by, and you can hear your own heartbeats.

For a sec you think that she won’t come to the door, but after a few more moments you hear quiet movement towards the door you’re standing in front of. You make a point to step to the side, so whoever is answering the door can’t see who’s standing there through the peephole.

Very slowly, you see the door handle turn, and the door swinging open several inches. You watch Spinel peek her head out the door, her phone in her hand, and turn to make direct eye contact with you. She freezes instantaneously, like she expected it to be anyone else other than you standing there. 

Her hair is in a messy bun, and your eyes trail down to notice that she’s wearing your sweater. 

This pisses you off immediately.

#spinel #spinel x reader #spinel su #spinel self insert #steven universe #my fic #devils ballroom

[tslasvegas]

Episode 4: “I'm sorry Daddy, I've been very naughty.” - Keegan

Dan and JAKE! A WORD IN MY OFFICE PLEASE! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS.

Wow! Today was A Day to say the least. I feel like boo boo the fool with how things went down today, but hopefully, I can recover from that now that there’s a new tribe. I’m excited to get to know new people, but sad to see my old alliances have to come to an end. I guess we’ll see what happens

Finally a swap and golly 5 OG Palazzo! I really hope this works in our favor. Kinda nervous for Joey and Stephanie tho because now they are in the minority of their tribe. I do hope they’ll find a way to survive till merge

LMFAO IM... watching the tribal council for the other tribe and I'm SORRY??? Who the fuck is Jake S he is the most condescending man I've ever seen in my entire life YIKES. Anyways this swap is nice.. I think I've got a good group, I really hope we win the next few immunities because I 1) really dont want to see Rachael on this tribe and 2) i want to try and rebuild my um. tattered relationships. I did the best I could in the challenge for tonight, I'll try to come back tomorrow a little more renewed cus I'm kinda wiped out from today's events. Now that my tribal council cherry has been popped for this Org its time to go crazy woop

So good not to check Luxor anymore! 

Well last tribal went fine, I got to see what was in the Prize Vault which is awesome; now I have a better idea of the twist. Big problem though- Our swap put me in the minority. I was running Luxor and had a core 4, now they have 5 OG Pink so they can pluck us off, one at a time. I went from drivers seat to getting driven over. We need to win the challenge, so I'm gonna go ham in winterbells and hope to pull it out.

We swapped! I think I made a confessional already, but honestly I don't remember. I gave Livingston some of my chips so he can go visit the vault after the immunity challenge. We'll see what is in there and for how much, and maybe snatch up some real nice items to help us out. I've also got Andrew on my side, which is great and he's apparently quite tight with Pat, which is fantastic. Mo is a pretty decent dude and I've been talking with Jake a lot today. Things are going alright. I just hope we can win this challenge. 

Phew, while the swap was not ideal. I was really liking my tribe, we were kind of quiet but individually everyone was great and we also kicked butt at challenges! Anyway, the swap with numbers wise not great, but I know Xavi from a previous game and we have a solid relationship, I hope he and John and Joey and myself can build a solid squad to make it to the merge. The challenge was rough tbh, I am not great at video games, but I think I did ok... Jaiden got like 20 trillion points on a game so really I have no idea how I did. Hoping for the best!

I am losing my mind in my personal life so I am sorry that I have been mia. I appreciate the patience from the hosts and my tribe. It makes me still want to play even though I've been kinda invisible. I'm aware of that. I'll fix it. I promise. Otherwise, its been pretty good as a tribe so far. Andrew, Pat, and NIk and i are all really close from other games, so we're good and Andrew and Pat and I are together, which is just really unfair if you ask me. I can't wait to start scheming!

Uhhhhhh.................................... anyways........ yall hear somethin? Oh I hear something. It's the sound of Joey literally blowing himself up to me hardcore!!!! The narcissism and arrogance really jumped out on this one. So Joey had the idea of calling tonight to go over some stuff and honestly out of the 2 hours we spent, I think about 45-60 mins of it was rather nice and I do feel that I enjoy his presence, but omg... his desire for control is so noticeable and its kinda gross. Joey and I debriefed on what went down on Bellagio and I totally understand why there was the difference in us discussing tribe dynamics - I had to give up all my info while he kinda kept things more reserved. I want to assume this is because of the fact that I went to tribal and he hasn't until now. I won't judge him for that. However, after this he's kinda like dictating the fact that an OG Bellagio needs to go home. Ben is the easier person to throw under the bus since he didn't even bother to do the challenge/let us know what's up. Not a big fan of that, but aight. Then Joey starts suggesting we vote out Kailyn...?? Uh... not on my watch. I have to make it up to Kailyn at least a little bit so even though she's probably got a loaded gun pointed at my head rn, I want to defuse the situation rather than start throwing her out there as a potential target. Even if it isn't coming from me, I'm not here for that. The information that Joey did give up to me relates to the chips in the game. I've never paid much attention to the chips, but I guess it takes 10 to get into the vault and Joey's got between 11 and 15 (he changed his answer on the subject SEVERAL times). He says there are three idols worth 40 chips each, then a super idol worth I think 50 or 60 (can't remember). On top of that, there are nullifiers, vote advantages, and a legacy advantage, too. He seems fixated on the legacy advantage and really wants the chips to get it. Like.. ok do you but we NEED the super idol?? Does he not realize that thing has more power than anything else in the vault combined..? ANYWAYS. What really started to turn me off about Joey is that there was this sudden expectation that I'd be giving him all of my chips thus far. I don't care about them to begin with but knowing what I know now, it doesn't make sense for me to give him my stash just to fuel his hunt for... a measly legacy advantage... I put myself in a compromising position. I told him that once a host gets back to me on my exact total, I'd be willing to trade him my chips for I guess an allyship going forward. I mean that. I want to work with Joey at least through this vote, but I can't guarantee that it'll go much further than that. He is a very risky person for my game right now because if he's coming off this strong to everybody, it's only going to hurt me by association to stick with him longer than a vote or two. However, I'm going to try and divert the attention and just be like, maybe we need to use my five as a bartering piece for new allies at this point. I want to try and build meaningful partnerships right now, especially since that was the only reason I wanted to make it to the merge.. Rebuilding is crucial as well. Kailyn and possibly Nik/Rachael are not going to be fond of me once we all have "the talk" about last tribal. I put myself in an even more compromising position with them, but I'll find my way out of that mess. I think........ As far as this tribe goes, I think between Joey's WILD imagination/constant over-analyzing and the lack of direction this tribe has taken so far.. I'm doing okay. Nobody is really standing out besides Joey and I guess myself in a way, so if I keep him around it MIGHT even shrink my own target little by little - unless people find out we're together then FUK. 

......five seconds later

In terms of my other relationships right now, I love John Coffey but this is old news, I've been in love with this man since like 2016 and it's fine - totally fine - just fangirling a bit rn since I get to spend more time with him!! woohoo. Xavier and Stephanie are straight up non-entities which makes me SO scared of them especially since Stephanie's won an ORG before... how can someone be so irrelevant yet still win something? Hmm... Makes me think that she's secretly a ninja, you never even see her around. Nik has grown more and more quiet as the days go along and I wonder what's goin' on with that. Maybe they've decided since Biden won the election that moving to New Zealand is a bad idea? Lmfao. I dunno. Nik stresses me the hell out because I have no idea what they're thinking at any point in time even in the off-chance that we are talking. I think I might just have a personality they don't mesh with because I noticed on call forever ago that none of my jokes were particularly landing but Nik had a lot to say and a LOT to joke about there... rip. If it's a personality conflict - go off, I guess. I'll try on a couple different hats w this person to try and see if I can get things to go better than they have been. Kailyn.. like I said before, pretty sure she's after me but I am really trying to sell it to her that I like her a lot, because I do. I literally compare her to my best friend irl because they have very similar attributes and I consider Kailyn kinda messy but fun and quirky like my BFF so I hope that Kailyn did truly appreciate me making that comparison. Ben's inability to do this challenge is going to be his undoing. I think the only acceptable move is to vote him off this time because I HAVE to prove to Kailyn that I can stay the course, and I also need to whittle down Bellagio numbers to prevent people from targeting us and having everything go to shit that way. Let Joey control this, please dear god. Don't let me get blood on my hands. Let Rachael integrate herself well on this tribe. Let someone else blow themselves up in the process. Just not me plz and thanks. There is no fear in my soul tonight. Joey might be a fucking crackhead but so am I. I'm breaking down walls that I didn't think existed but Joey basically told me tonight that he thought I was confrontational, rude, chaotic, and all these other things but was impressed at how calm, optimistic, and outgoing I was. Love to hear it. He might think he overestimated me but he was right about the initial impressions... too bad he won't be around long enough to see that side of me :~) 

FIRSTLY, DeNara was robbed. Okay so I already wrote this a while ago in my host chat about how the fact jake and dan are praying for my downfall because after the swap i am the only og bellagio on a tribe with 5 palazzo and 2 luxor. so after I slowly blinked at my screen for a bit I was like okay how do we survive this if I go to tribal. Because I’m under the impression tribes are gonna stick together especially going into merge but since Luxor is already down so many members it’s kinda Bellagio Vs. Palazzo. but then I was like okay wait I’m the only member of bellagio on this tribe after coming from a tribal so I’m the only one who can say what happened and I can create what narrative I want to help me get through the next couple rounds. Because if I was like oh blah blah I was in majority im so fucked then of course they’re gonna target me to get me out. But if I play the victim card and milk the fact that I voted in the minority acting like I hate my og tribe maybe they’ll think to use me as a pawn. To take down others moving forward. Listen if I have to be labeled a goat to move forward then BAA bitch.

.....five seconds later

Things are going good, because not only am no longer in danger this round but that means Rachael is going to the enemy tribe which if she came to our tribe that might’ve disrupted the narrative I had going of me being against og bellagio. Also DeNara should still be here, don’t think I didn’t clock the fact that Ben scored a 0. I also found out from Andrew that Rachael and Ben are apart of the same Tengaged group which explains why Rachael was so set on Ben staying but like, listen, if I end up in a game with someone I’m friends with, and they’re not active and helping the tribe. Good riddance.

What the. We lost yet again. I have lost everything since the start of the game. It's crazy. There are 4 from Bellagio, 2 Palazzo and 2 Luxor. 2+2 seems like an obvious plan, but it looks like it is falling apart already (read: Joey). Sucks to be across the world, so instead of scheming, I'll be sleeping.

Forgive me father, for I have sinned. is the same as I'm sorry Daddy, I've been very naughty. 

The swap did happen. Expected it. Glad we won this first challenge in this new tribe tho in worried for Stephanie and Joey

Vault Shenanigans - Holy shit I did not expect this to be as powerful as it is. I was preparing myself for some sort of payment based search system, but being able to straight up buy the items I want, but its also the same for other people. I had a misconception at how generous the wheel was so I'm probably behind some people with the amount of chips, but I could very well start scooping up some of the steal votes and just say "see ya" to the idols, although getting a super idol would be very wild, it still seems risky to hold out that long to get it, even though there's a great amount of power associated with it. The other issue with a super idol is that I think that its very likely that if I get into a position where I need to use it, that I lose a lot of respect with the jury if it does happen. The only benefit from actually having it would be that I no longer have to worry about someone else whipping it out, so it'd be less for me wanting it, but more for others not having it. As of now, I think my optimal play is to hold on to my chips until around ~40, and then buy both vote steals at once, OR go all out for the super if someone has already bought an idol by that point, because I would be operating under the assumption that the frontrunner is already out of the running. Tribe Swap Shenanigans - This is a hell of a tribe swap. 5-2-1 is always a great spot to be in, I am already good within the 5 that I have so I don't have to worry about anything there, it should be relatively smooth sailing as far as getting to the merge. Mo/Jake are alright so far, neither particularly speak too much. Kevin has not reached out at all, probably will try to talk to him tonight for general purposes, even if he seems like he'd be an easy one to get out first should we go to tribal the next time. But generally I really don't plan on losing so it's kind of a wash. I'll take the smooth sailing, easy path to merge. Premerge is never as relevant as merge is when it comes to FTC as long as you have something to show for yourself at the merge. I've got all game to make my presence known, and I plan on using the entirety of the game to do so.

I feel super anxious today because even though I had a great conversation and built a good connection to Joey, there hasn't been any talk about the vote quite yet. I mean obviously names have rolled out but nothing solid is out there still, I think I just need to let go of the urgency for a name to start being spread early on and just let things be. Stephanie and I have been chatting a bit here and there today so I feel more comfortable with her and hopefully she sees things from a similar perspective as everyone else - the Bellagio foursome needs to get broken up right now. As long as it's not my name of course!!!!! Plz vote Ben @everyone. Or Kailyn tbh save me a little bit of trouble now. Talking to Xavier is SO HARD LMAO. He doesn't immediately contribute information into a conversation and as bad as I wanna get rid of Ben, I almost..almost think going for Xavier is the smarter move, since Xavier doesn't seem too motivated to actually get to know ME and work with me. I'm selfish that way. Kailyn doesn't seem like she wants to do Ben which is a little frustrating but I totally get it, if Ben stays he's going to go after her hardcore but like she needs to actually pitch me an alternative lmfao. I don't wanna go bending over backwards just to appease her right now so if she doesn't gimme a name.. sorry sis but then I think it's gonna be Joey's call on this one :/

I am being very cautious now. The 4 of us (me, John, Joey and Steph) are going to vote together. Now Jaiden wants to vote Nik. And Kailyn wants to vote Ben. Why can't we just agree on one?! And it always has to go down to the wire. Stick together, people!

I think I am possibly leading the charge against Nik rn?? Joey told me he wanted Ben and then I told him I wanted Nik and now he wants Nik LOL take that Stephen 

Okay well I have no idea what's going to happen tonight, but I'm going into tribal not afraid of the vote I am probably going to have to make ... I think the best move is to just vote for Nik and be done with it, but it's going to cause a serious rift in a lot of my relationships if I do so. I've been super wishy-washy to a lot of people I think and right now it doesn't make sense to continuously do one thing when I mean another.. especially since there seems to be zero ground to move upon when it comes to getting the vote to turn from Nik to Ben. Nik doesn't even SEEM ACTIVE?? Why are we making this a bigger deal than it needs to be. Ben can't just walk around deciding what's going on and I think Kailyn would prefer to keep Nik around rather than Ben but it's like... so push for Ben to be the target hun! She's feeding into someone else's move no matter what she does, it's either Ben's agenda or John's agenda. Pick a side, but pick the side I'm on, too. Why don't we just vote for Kailyn tbh. lmao

[wh-yy-ou]

Familiar pt.4

The next day you woke up with a pounding headache as you felt MJ passed out next to you. You smiled, glad to have such a good friend. You yawned and got up, rubbing your eyes. MJ was a heavy sleeper so when you tripped but caught yourself on the door, she just shuffled and went peacefully back to sleep. You sighed and walked to the kitchen, a hair a mess, makeup smudged and clothes wrinkly. When you entered the kitchen Tony and Steve were sitting at the island, talking about some plans. They both looked up to see you and Steve's face saddened as Tony's looked confused since he didnt know what happened last night. "Hey kiddo, you look lovely this morning- actually, make that evening" Tony said before you gave him a cold glare while opening the fridge to grab two muffins, one for MJ. Steve elbowed him and told him to shut his mouth for once. Tony pouted, even more confused now. "Its fine dad" you said, then looking at Tony "Peter cheated on me and so we broke up" you said, your voice getting more quiet while you spoke. Tony looked surprised. Peter? Cheating? ON YOU??? But Peter loved you and from what he last saw, he still had that some lovestruck look on his face. Tony nodded, apologizing and then heading to his office to call for him. Your dad got up and hugged you, saying you could miss school for today. You nodded and thanked him, pecking his cheek before walking back to your room where MJ was looking through her phone, waiting for you. You walked in and MJ looked up, asking how you were as you start down next to her and handed her a muffin. "Could be better" you responded, taking off the muffin wrap and then taking a bite. She snickered and then told you to clean up since she was gonna take you out and get your mind off Peter. You nodded and MJ just went back on her phone as you cleaned yourself up, wiping the make-up off and taking a shower. Once you came out MJ had stolen your hoodie and sweatpants and was waiting for you. When you came back she then walked with you to the kitchen, telling Steve her and you were gonna hang for a bit and he made an exception. As you walked out, the fresh air made your headache hurt less. "Let's go to that cafe you like, whatever the name of it is. Then we can go to the mall and walk around, maybe go to the arcade". You looked at her surprised since she never liked going to the mall, especially with you since you loved looking at clothes. You smiled and nodded. "Ok!". She smiled and you guys walked down to the cafe. When you walked in, you saw the person working at the register. Liz. God dammit. You were supposed to have fun today, NOT think about what happened. But of course, being satan she is, she had to come and ruin it right when things were start to lighten up. MJ noticed your scrunched face and told you to find a table. You nodded and went to one of the tables next to the windows since you liked watching the world bustle around.(not in a creepy way of course). As MJ went up to the counter, another person entered. You looked up to see Flash. GIVE ME A BREAK.

"Hey cupcake, you're lookin mighty fine today, what're you doing here all alone?" He said, sitting in the sit across from you. Your eyebrow twitched as you just continued to look out the window. "Go away Flash, you know what happened yesterday, I'm not in the mood" you said in a more stern tone than usual. Flash just smirked and leaned closer to you. "Yea, Penis Parker pulled a real dick move. I'm sure you're not feeling the best which is why I wanna get your mind off him" he said, going to slide his hand onto yours. Before he could MJ slammed her hand down on the table and glared at Flash. "Screw off dickhead, (y/n) nor me want to deal with your shit right now". He just rolled his eyes and looked at her with annoyance. "You don't know how she feels, you cant tell her what she does and doesnt want". Flash being a dick was something you were used to. But today? Today you were NOT having it. You got up, walked around the table and then socked Flash in the face. He groaned, holding his eye and MJ just stood there, shocked. You huffed and crossed your arms. "Go home before I decide to have your eyes match jackass". With that, flash left. Once he left you shook your hand, your knuckles throbbing. "Ow...". MJ smiled and patted your back. "Look at you, feel any better?" She said with amusement. You shrugged. "A little, though now my knuckles hurt....". MJ just laughed and handed you your coffee, then walking out with you. "Well at least you got some of that frustration out. Maybe tomorrow we can go to that place where they give a bunch of shit to break. Or we can just go somewhere abandoned, either way, we should break shit". You snickered and rolled your eyes, taking a sip of your coffee. "Yea, maybe, just imagine it all being Peter's stupid face and kick the shit out of it"

You both soon arrived at the mall and walked inside, it not being really busy. You both just walked around, looking at stuff, buying a few shirts and pants and then going to the arcade. MJ beat your ass.

While you and MJ hung out, Tony called Peter and told him to come to his office as soon as possible. Peter knew he was in trouble. Once he arrived he knocked on the door and peeked his head in. "M-Mr. Stark? You want to s-see me?". Tony just nodded as he clicked away on his computer. Peter walked in, closing the door behind him before sitting down and twiddling with his fingers. Tony shut his computer off and folded his hands together, looking at Peter as Peter just looked down at his hands. "Kid, you know why your here. Why'd you do it? I know you still love (y/n)". Peter flinched at your name a little and shook his head, rubbing his neck. "M-Mr.Stark, I really didnt want to, but I h-had to". Tony just raised an eyebrow. "Is someone blackmailing you? Was someone gonna die if you hadn't?". "N-No.....". Tony sighed. "Then you shouldnt have done it, you guys were doing so well. Why?". Peter teared up. "Because im not good enough....." he mumbled, wiping away a tear. "What?" "IM NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR HER" Peter yelled as his hands clenched. "She's amazing and wonderful and-and just, a goddess......she deserves better...." Tony pinched the bridge of his nose "that doesn't explain why you cheated on her". Peter flinches again, remembering. "I-I knew if I did, she wouldn't reconsider being with me if I just broke up with her. She wont question and she can move on to someone better....". "Kid, for being a superhero and one of the smartest kids in your class, your really fucking stupid". Peter looked up at Tony surprised. "Dont look at me like that, you know that was stupid. You were feeling insecure, I get it, but you should have talked with her about how you felt instead of being selfish and hurting her like this". Peter sat there. Was what he did that stupid? Yea, it was. Peter just shrugged "Even so Mr.Stark, how could I fix it? She hates me now, she wouldn't even glance at me so having a one on one talk would be impossible". Ton sighed and stood up. "Give her time, she needs to heal. You really hurt her. Once she's doing better, figure out a way, THATS NOT STUPID, to talk with her, even if you dont get back together, you need to have that conversation so it's not dangling over your head". Peter just nodded. "Also your suit privileges are taken away for a few weeks". Peter's eyes widened and he pouted. "W-what!? Why!?". "For being stupid".

Note: howdy hi!! Hope you enjoyed!! A little short but ya know, wasnt really feeling it today (=~='). Pt.5 is in the works so stay tuned!

#peter parker ? reader #peter parker #peter parker × reader #spiderman

[velshie]

Kingfield Omegaverse

Dwight swore he could feel his heart going a mile per hour when he received the envelope in his hands. This is it, he’s just turned 18 and now it’s time for the school's mandatory secondary gender test.

Dwight had never really been afraid of these before. He came from a family of Beta’s, minus the fact that his older brother was an Alpha but with how almost painfully average he was, he never had that thought that he could be an Alpha or Omega. 

So then why was he so nervous?

He shook his head almost laughing at himself for his nerves and putting the results in his bag. The chances of him being anything other than a beta were slim to none and he knew that, besides he’ll open it later. Walking past the medical office he was in, he made his way to the foyer as he left the school and sat on a concrete block. Not too far from him were two bigger boys who were having a conversation loudly, not even noticing Dwight there yet. 

“I’m not even surprised we’re Alpha’s, it was kinda obvious.” His tone was casual, but it held a bit of pride in his voice. Dwight wasn’t much surprised either, but he was a little jealous. Alpha’s are top of the food chain after all. They usually have the drive and ambition to get whatever they want whenever they want. That includes-

“Yeah dude, me neither but think man, we get to have a cute little omega to claim.” He grinned at his friend and Dwight could feel his nose scrunch and disgust. He genuinely felt so bad for Omega’s, while they no longer are seen as property, they still have a long way to go to be respected. They are still over-sexualized and objectified by Alpha’s but at least there are laws to protect them. Ignoring the conversation, Dwight quickly looked at his phone. David should be finished up with a meeting with his teachers by now, so what’s the holdup?

“Hey Fairfield, what did your results say?” Dwight ripped his eyes from his phone and looked at the two guys asking the question surprised that they were talking to him. He knew Hunter and Eli from David, as they both play rugby outside of school with him, but they never showed much of an interest to really have a conversation with him. 

“Beta pretty expected.” The two nodded, not surprised in the least at his secondary gender. One of them looked at him and snickered and Dwight looked confused but braces himself for an insult. They have become pretty subtle with what they dish out given that David is his best friend and obviously the bigger Alpha compared to those two. Dwight would be surprised if his friend was anything else.

“Yeah, you being a beta makes sense, but for a minute there, I thought you’d be an omega.” Dwight was almost insulted but mostly confused. Curious, he leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees and leaning forward, his attention focused on them.

“An Omega? What makes you think that?” Eli snickered and elbowed his friend.

“Because you’re really weak, duh!” Dwight just gave him a flat look but didn’t say anything, not wanting to provoke the newly presented Alpha into handing his ass to him on a silver platter. However, the look Hunter, the one who inquired, gave him a look so intense it made his skin crawl. 

“You’re also kinda cute too, like a lot of Omegas. Soft and very...Submissive.” Dwight clenched his jaw, feeling almost physically gross. His friend also gave him a strange look and gave Dwight an uninterested once over. 

“I can’t say I agree dude, he looks pretty plain beta male to me.” Hunter’s look never wavered from Dwight. His eyes roaming Dwight’s body, looking like he’s itching to touch him and it made Dwight shrink into himself. 

“Oi, losers!” The boys look lost intensity as he was startled. The other alpha grinned and gave a wave and greeted the stronger alpha. Dwight felt himself deflate in relief as his best friend came down those stairs, giving him a friendly shove before greeting the other guys. 

“Babysittin’ over ‘ere I see?” Eli snorted, making playful banter and just roughhoused with him, making Dwight smile. He was glad that David could make friends easier then he could, Dwight was never great at making friends but thanks to David and knowing him since they were 6, he was able to still keep his friendship with David while he helped him make friends. 

And kept bullies at bay.

Dwight looked over at the other boy who caught his eye. The look wasn’t as intense but it was still full of intent that Dwight had an inkling it wasn’t innocent, given his little description about him when explaining his assumption. Hunter’s eyes darted to David, casually greeting him but not joining in on the play. 

“So dude,” Eli said, stopping their horseplay to look at him excitedly. “You got your results yeah? Alpha?” David gave him a playful but rough shove that Dwight was sure would break 99% of his bones if he were receiving it. 

“Obviously mate, what else would I be, an Omega?” He joked as the other two laughed, razzing him on how much of an ugly Omega he would make. Hunter glanced quickly in his direction once again and Dwight’s amusement at David’s antics died as the frequent stares and glances made him uncomfortable. He wanted to leave and fast, but he knew it was up to David and Dwight knew he couldn’t monopolize David’s time with other people. He had other friends then Dwight but god he wanted to avoid the Alpha’s darkening blue eyes. The stare made him feel dirty…

“Ready ta go?” Was what he heard before a large hand tangle into dark brown hair and knocked his head forward. Dwight feigned an indignant noise but his false outrage was obvious based on the grin on his face. 

“Been waiting on your slow ass this entire time!” He hopped off the concrete slab he was sitting on before taking his place next to David like usual, not bothered that the alpha towered over him. He outgrew him when he was 13, he stopped being bothered by the height difference a long time ago. David lightly hip-checked his smaller friend, not enough to make him fly but enough to move him slightly. 

“Aight, ya shit, let’s go.” He said placing a large hand on the back of Dwight’s neck, urging him to move. Dwight looked at his friend curiously, this is something he doesn’t usually to ever, but Dwight wasn’t all that bothered. He loved David, more than he probably should, so his friend’s touch was always welcome.

As David said his goodbyes, Dwight kept silent and didn’t look back. He didn’t want to know if those eyes were on him anymore but thankfully David came in at the nick of time and he didn’t have to think about it anymore. They were casually chatting like they usually did, nothing awkward or forced just their usual banter and enjoying each other’s company. 

“So, what was that all about?” David’s inquiry sounded confused and almost aggressive? Dwight looked at him with a quirked eyebrow, not understanding what he’s talking about.

“You’re going to have to be a little more specific because that came out of nowhere,” Dwight said, his tone was teasing but David only soured and the brunette couldn’t figure out what it was that changed his mood suddenly. 

“Th’ way Hunter was lookin’ atcha, kinda weird don’ ya think?” Dwight’s expression changed, he was hoping to forget about that whole exchange and couldn’t help but shudder a bit, wanting to shake off the stare. 

“No kidding, talk about uncomfortable. The way it all started too? No seriously, it was so weird!” David didn’t look at him like he didn’t believe him. His face was uncharacteristically serious, his expression was stony. To be quite honest it kind of unnerved him a bit, so he looked forward and just kept rambling.

“He was asking about my results, right? Then he was saying I looked like an Omega because I was cute and submissive looking.” He trailed off, not looking back at his friend but feeling so much better now that he was getting it off his chest. “Like who says that? Especially from Hunter. I know him and Eli don’t care much for me and are only decent because they’re friends with you. So when Hunter just said that, I gotta admit, it wasn’t expected and frankly I feel sorry for any omega he’s around.” 

Dwight glanced back at his friend and he was surprised at how furious he was. His teeth were clenched tight and his fist was balled up, knuckles turning completely white. Dwight always knew David was almost unreasonably protective over him and everyone knew that. But he thought he would laugh at something so weird then get aggressive over it. Then again, it could be because he just dissed his friend. 

“You good man? It’s not a big deal, it was just a really weird moment. He’s probably going into a rut or whatever. Apparently, after we present and get our result, we should be going through the worst of it something this month and he’s horny or something.” He didn’t know why he was defending Hunter’s actions, they really weren’t acceptable but he hated seeing David so angry. He also wasn’t going to apologize for what he said about the other Alpha, especially when what he said was true. 

“It’s fine, I’ll probably ‘ave a chat with ‘im tomorrow.” Was all David said before everything went silent. Dwight wasn’t sure what was going on with his friend. Sure this wasn’t a...Common occurrence but not enough for him to get angry about. After a couple of minutes, David spoke again, the anger has calmed down enough for him to start another conversation. 

“So, you got the test results back you said?” Dwight nodded and shrugged, he hadn’t opened the letter yet but he knew he didn’t really have to. He was going to open it, just to say he saw it and then chuck it out. 

“Yup, beta. Not surprising, but I would rather have that then be an Omega, ya know? Especially after the whole Hunter thing.” David frowned, and Dwight could tell that he was getting defensive. 

“Aw c’mon Dwight, yer not jumpin’ on that bandwagon are ya? I think Omega’s get shit on enough, you saw a fraction o’ what happened and jus’ look at what they say about me mum.” Dwight instantly felt guilty. He loved David’s mum and he would never want to say anything bad about her. Dwight knew it wasn’t what he meant though, so he scrambled a bit to find his wording.

“What? No! I have nothing against them. I just...I dunno. They have it so hard and I just don’t know if I could handle what they go through. Especially with Al-Entitled...People.” Dwight stumbled for a minute, choosing his words carefully so he didn’t offend his childhood best friend, who didn’t seem all that impressed. He clicked his tongue in irritation, firmly keeping his eyes off of Dwight.

“Nice save,” He said sarcastically, his voice holding a bitter tinge to it and the guilt weight even heavier on Dwight’s poor heart. He never wanted to insult him, but it felt in the moment nothing he said would have been positive. “But sure, whatever I guess.” They reached their neighborhood and David spread up, Dwight almost jogging to keep up with him at a quicker pace.

“Come on David, I didn’t mean it like that, I’m sorry!” David ignored him and Dwight could feel himself deflate. Once you’ve annoyed David, nothing will reason with him until he gets out of his mood and Dwight has been on that side of David’s temper before. “Alright… I’ll see you tomorrow I guess.” David just grunted, turning into the house across from Dwight’s and entered the house without even a goodbye. Dwight huffed in irritation and David’s dramatics and stormed into his own house, mood dampened. 

“Dwight? Is that you?” His mother called out, making him stop at the top of the stairway. 

“Yeah mom, it’s me. School was fine, going to do homework.” His voice was clipped and it was obvious that he was in no mood to talk to anyone about his day. David put him in a bad mood and now he just wants to be alone and unbothered. He didn’t wait long to continue heading back to his room, not waiting for his mother to answer him back. As he entered, he shut his door and chucked his backpack to the corner of his room between his bed and the computer desk. 

Whatever David overreacted and he’ll get over it. Dwight wasn’t going to expect David to wait for him on their usual walk to school together when David is like this, he gives Dwight the silent treatment all day and then will start talking to him again. Not the most mature solution but it was a David solution that drives him up the wall. Dwight huffed as he threw himself on the bed, crossing his arms with a pout. His eyes landed on the bag he threw in the corner remembering his test results and got up to open up in his bag.

All of a sudden, he felt his stomach twist with nerves. He hated anticipation, he knew what he was but...What if it was something else? Dwight took a deep breath and shook his head. No, he’s over thinking it and this stupid envelope was giving him anxiety. Besides, he would be one very plain looking Omega if he was. Dwight snorted at that thought as he ripped the top of the envelope open. Unfolding the results his eyes skimmed everything else before his eyes landed on the symbol. 

Dwight froze as he started to frantically read the rest of the paper. He didn’t see the italicized B with the elongated tail that he was expecting. Instead, the results showed an open O. There must have been a mistake, it didn’t make any sense. 

He couldn’t be an Omega. 

He let go of the paper and ran into the bathroom that was attached to his room. Throwing up all the contents in his stomach. After a bit of dry heaving, he removed himself and resting in the nook between the toilet and the bathroom, his breathing hitting hyperventilating levels. He didn’t know what to do or who to tell. Does he tell his parents? His brother? 

David?

He didn’t think he would be an alpha like his brother Jeff, but he showed no signs that he was an Omega. All the signs pointed to be like his parents, his aunts, uncles and his cousins. Beta. 

Dwight in his panic couldn’t hold his tears back but he did try to regain his breathing. He’ll tell Jeff, he’ll know what to do. His older brother always knew what to do. His hands shook as he took out his phone, going through his call history and pressing it flush against his ear and heard it start ringing.

“Come on Jeff, pick up the phone. Pick up the phone Jeff. Please, please, please-” 

“Hello? Dwight? What’s up bud?” Dwight was so relieved his brother answered that he just burst into another wave of tears, just sobbing into his brother's ear as Jeff let out a concerned noise, trying to calm down his brothers panic. Dwight wasn’t exactly a cry baby, but he was prone to anxiety attacks that evolved into panic attacks. It was concerning, but Dwight was always good at talking to someone before it hit this level.

“Shh shh, Dwight, it’s okay. I’m here, what do you need?” Dwight was always soothed by his brother's voice. For an alpha, he always had such a soothing voice that could help calm him down. It was so very, unlike the stereotyped Alpha that David seemed to fit into better. Jeff, even for his size and stoic looking nature was also riddled with anxiety and had been in Dwight’s place before but was always able to help his little brother in his time of need.

It only made Dwight wonder if Jeff had someone to help him through his moments. Who was his person when he needed it? Jeff leads him through some breathing exercises, calming him down through the phone. His voice holding no maliciousness or annoyance, but concern and familial love that left Dwight feeling calm, if not exhausted. 

“There we go, do you feel better?” Dwight nodded at first at the question before realizing that Jeff couldn’t see it. He took a shaky breath before confirming that he was better. 

“Good, I’m glad to hear I could help. But Dwight, what happened?” And Dwight spilled everything. The creep that had been eyeing him like a piece of meat, the fight with David and what he said to him to make him angry, the test results that sent him into a fit of panic. Everything. He completely spilled his guts to his older brother who let out a surprised noise at the fact of his little brother's secondary gender. 

“Okay, I’m almost home‍. I was going to surprise you with a visit but I think we need to figure out a plan. Have you told mom and dad yet?” Dwight shook his head before realizing he did it again and his brother couldn’t see him.

“No, your the only one who knows and I want it to stay like that.” Jeff let out a grunt that Dwight knew he fully disagreed on. Jeff was not the kind of person to spread information that was not his to spread and Dwight knew he would keep a secret if asked too, despite whether or not he agreed.

“I think you need to tell them, Dwight, it would be better for you if you do that. You already have me to back you up but mom and dad probably be able to help you more.” He paused for a second, Dwight could almost hear the thoughts going through Jeff’s mind. “Why don’t you talk to David’s mom? You don’t have to tell David yet, even though that should be done sooner rather than later too. But she would give you more valuable information than any of us.” 

Dwight processed the information and despite how embarrassing it was, Jeff was right. David’s mom was an Omega and she helped both Jeff and him for years, treating the two like they were an extension of her own family. She would always be happy to help and I’m sure she wouldn’t mind taking care of an Omega pup herself. 

“Yeah…Yeah, your right. But can we just...Keep it to ourselves for now.” Jeff sighed but agreed to keep it on the down low for now. As they kept talking about how art school was going for Jeff and how his band his doing, The oldest told him he had to get going if he wanted to make it to the house by tonight. Excited, Dwight hung up after their goodbyes, feeling a bit better but still anxious. Taking a glance at his phone, he saw there weren’t any texts from David as expected, and put it on the charger and went to take a shower. He needed some time to think and what better place then a shower?

-

After he was done, he checked his phone to see that it was still empty of messages but he went and opened up a message to David’s mom instead. He never usually texted anything to her unless Dwight gave her a heads up that they were going out and David was notorious for forgetting to text her which left her worried sick and had her pacing. He sat there, not knowing what to do or say but he knew she would be the best person to talk to. He decided against it and tossed his phone on the other side of the bed and covered his face with his hands. He wasn’t ready yet for anyone but to know, he trusted Jeff and he wasn't the type to blab. Plus, he was always close with Jeff, he couldn’t imagine not telling him something like this, it would be like not telling David.

Dwight paused for a minute. David. What was he going to tell him? He had told his best friend he was a beta, so what now? Would he think he was a liar? Would it be better to keep it from him? 

“No. No, I’m going to tell him.” He said to himself and looked at his phone. It didn’t feel right to text him about this on the phone, not something as big as this anyway. He’ll tell him tomorrow after school or something when he was ready to talk to him again. He picked up the test results again and really read it. The information really sinking in and that this was real. He felt exhausted, putting the paper down he curled up in his bed, ready for a nap. No one was waiting for him anyway so a nap couldn’t hurt ...He felt his eyes grow heavy before they closed. 

Yeah, maybe an hour or two won’t hurt.

—

Dwight almost jumped out of bed when he heard a soft knock at his door. His heart racing even though his eyes were still heavy. He looked at the test results that we chucked into his night table and put it into one of the draws, not wanting his parents to see just in case. 

“Come in.” He said, his voice still thick with sleep and the initial fright was gone. His door opened slowly before a man with long hair and a big, bushy beard poked his head in with a big smile. 

“Hey sleepy head, did I wake you?” Dwight could almost feel his eyes sparkle in excitement, jumping off his bed to give his brother a hug, who returned it just as fiercely. He didn’t see his older brother enough as it is, he was glad to see him back from Canada. 

“Yeah, but I think I’d be more pissed off if you didn’t,” Dwight said as he let go, letting Jeff walk into his room and they both sat on the bed. It was nostalgic, it reminded him of when they were younger and would talk and play video games when David would be in England visiting family. David was his best friend but Jeff was a close second. 

“You feeling better now?” He said casually and Dwight paused for a second before he shook his hand in a so-so motion.

“It...Has kind of settled in but I’m- I don’t know how to feel. I know what they have to go through and I’m...Afraid if what’s coming for me.” Jeff smiled at him sadly before ruffling his brother's hair.

“It’s not going to be easy Dwight but that doesn’t mean your life is over. The world isn’t going to go out of its way to get you because your an Omega. Yeah, you're going to have to...Ya know, Be more careful about...those, uh, biological urges...Dwight- Dwight stop laughing, I’m trying my best here and it’s awkward.” What started out as a giggle blew up into full-blown laughter, only making him laugh harder when Jeff hit him with his pillow. Jeff feeling awkward was something that never failed to amuse him, especially since most Alpha’s are shameless, so seeing such a humble Alpha who got weirded out by talking to his brother about normal body functions was hilarious! 

“I’m so-sorry, I’m sorry, s-stop, your gonna make me pee myself!” Dwight was barely able to get those words out through his mirth. He missed this, he missed having time with his older brother. When Jeff left to go to art school in Edmonton, Dwight couldn’t have felt more betrayed and abandoned. But Jeff always did his best to make sure he was still involved with his life and with David there, it made the separation a little easier. 

“Then stop laughing geez! You know how awkward I get when talking about this shit. With my little brother no less!” Jeff said exasperated, before he leaned back, running his hands through long hair. “David still having a good ol tantie? You would think at 18 he would get over having temper tantrums and talk like an adult.” Jeff rolled his eyes and settled himself against the wall. 

Jeff loved David like a little brother, but when David gets into these moods Jeff tends to get a little annoyed. When they were younger Jeff would always cold shoulder him and get defensive over Dwight. It always hurt his little brother when they didn’t talk and he was sure it still did, Dwight just got used to it now. 

“It’s...Just his way of needing a break to get over it. He always does. By the end of tomorrow, he’ll probably start talking to me again.” Jeff leveled him an unimpressed look but shrugged it off. That was David and as much as it annoyed both the brothers they knew it was just something they had to ride out. 

“Sure, whatever. Want me to pick you up tomorrow, maybe hit up a clinic before the weekend starts? One less thing to worry about.” It was a gentle prod and Dwight did his best not to get annoyed or defensive. Jeff was doing this because he knew he was the only one to know about his secondary gender and this was to help him keep it hush hush. 

“You can pick me up but...Can I see how I feel after school?” Jeff nodded in understanding a shrugged.

“Sure, see what you want to do. Personally, I think it’s better getting it out of the way, but if you want to wait a bit til Monday, we can.” Dwight smiled in relief, thankful for his brothers kind nature. He didn’t know what he’d do without him. Jeff yawned before he got up before he did a stretch, his spine and joints popping. 

“Anyway, dinner is ready, I’m exhausted, but I miss our family dinners. You coming?” He said, knowing the answer as he opened the door and Dwight got up before pushing his brother out of the way in a not so gentle shove.

“Last one there gets the smaller plate!” Jeff let out an indignant cry before chasing after his brother, not wanting to be beaten. 

“Come back here you little shit, I just came home after a long drive! After all I’ve done for you!” 

It was a good night and despite the news that rocked Dwight’s world like an earthquake, he felt better with a bit of normality. His family is together again during his time of need, despite only one of them knowing what he’s going through. But with all the laughter and light banter, Dwight could forget about it for the night and continue like he was normal. 

—

The next morning, Dwight woke up feeling groggy. He could easily crawl back into bed and sleep it off but knowing that he couldn’t, he got up to start his day. Jeff was already down there sipping on a cup of coffee and working on a sketch. He looked up, took a sniff then scrunched his nose in disgust. He turned to where his brother was and sent the look his way. 

“Dude, go take a shower, you stink.” Dwight blinked a little at that but shrugged. Maybe that will help him wake up more and maybe get that fog out of his brain. Trudging back upstairs he took a hot shower, feeling a little better but the feeling didn’t go. As he got back downstairs, he got his brothers approval that he didn’t reek anymore and Jeff made him a cup to maybe help him feel better.

It didn’t, but whatever. 

Jeff grabbed his keys and told Dwight to get in the car, they took a look to see if David was waiting and no David in sight. Dwight leaned into the window, not in the mood to talk or even do anything. All he wanted to do was listen to the radio and drift off. Unfortunately for Dwight, they got to the school faster then he had wanted and thanked his brother, who gave him a thumbs up before driving off. Dwight shuffled into the school and hung by his locker, grabbing the things he needed for class, zoning in and out. Was he getting sick? He felt fine yesterday despite his panic attack but other than that he felt like everything was fine.

As he walked to class he felt himself start to cramp. At first, they were little ones, then they got worse and almost excruciatingly painful. What is going on? He could feel himself start to sweat, his body feels like it’s on fire and it felt like it was too hot to breathe. Maybe he should go to the nurse, she’ll know what to do. He made his way down to the school nurse, opening the door to see the pretty redheaded woman going through some files before look up to send a kind smile to her patient before it dropped and she looked more stunned. 

“Dwight? Sweetheart come here, Your smell hit me like a train as soon as you came in.” She said, gently pulling him forward and closing the door, locking it in place as she urged him to lay down. 

“Everything hurts Mrs. Smithson.” Dwight panted out, almost groaning in relief when she placed a cool hand on his burning forehead. Hurt was not exactly the most correct term, overwhelmed would be closer. So many sensations that he’s never felt before all coming at him at once. 

“I know sweetheart, you're experiencing your first heat. It’s almost ironic being that you have just gotten your test results yesterday.” It was a joke, but Dwight couldn’t seem to get himself to laugh. Instead, he just listened to her soothing voice to help anchor himself from all the sensations.

“I-I don’t know what I did.” Mrs.Smithson gave him a sympathetic look, grabbing an ice pack and wrapping it in a towel before placing it where her hand used to be. 

“It’s nothing you did, it’s just your clock. Sometimes heats come at a different time and yours is right on time. Sometimes when there are Alpha’s around it helps speed up the process. Even just being near one can trigger the first heat and then you can be near one without going into heat as long as the Alpha is not in a rut. Where you near any Alpha’s lately? 

Dwight nodded, scrambling to find words as his body got hotter and everything was getting hazier. Cramps were starting to subside but suddenly he felt a wetness spread between his legs, slick and uncomfortable which made him give out a whine. 

“My brother is an Alpha, M-my best friend is too, we grew up together ya know? He’s mad at me, but I still think he’s the best friend anyone could ask for. I don’t know what I’d do without him, he’s amazing.” He started to babble, he knew he was babbling but right now, all he wanted was for David to be near him and to help him. He wanted David’s body to surround him and claim him.

Mrs. Smithson looked at him fondly. She knew that his thoughts were going more on the primal side but the way he talked about David was so similar to the way she talked about her husband. She knew heats were bad but she can tell a genuine fatuation just by the way he talked about him. However, he started to squirm and the most she could do was try and keep his head steady while she kept the ice pack on his forehead. 

“I’m going to call your parents okay Dwight? I’m going to see if anyone can come and get you.” Wild eyes looked up at her before shaking his head. His body starting to tremble. The first heat was always the worst, but he had it bad.

“Jeff! Call my brother Jeff, he’s the only one that knows that I- That I’m a- Just please, not my parents!” She hushed him and agreed. Asking necessary questions like if he was on his emergency contact lists, to which Dwight had confirmed he was. All of his family was on there just in case. She nodded as she had got up and grabbed her keys.

“Dwight, Dwight Sweetheart I need you to look at me okay-there we go, good boy. Do not open the door for anyone. Not for faculty, not for sick students, not even for David, okay?” Dwight gave out the most heartbreakingly distressed whine that she had ever heard and it almost made her wonder if…

“I know Dwight, I know. But I need you to promise me not to open the door for anyone.” Dwight nodded, letting the nurse place his hand to hold the ice pack, before she left, locking the door and making sure that it was locked before she left. Dwight felt nausea settle into his stomach from all the overwhelming sensation, he wanted this to stop, this hurt! God, he’ll do almost anything to make this all stop! 

That nausea got worse and he felt himself start to gag. But there was nowhere to throw up! Where were the trash cans??? There was no way he can throw up on the floor of the medical room! He stumbled out of bed, letting his ice pack hit the floor and he rushed as fast as he could to the door which he unlocked and ran to the men’s bathroom that was next door. Running to the stall with the only toilet, he proceeded to throw up the coffee and stomach acid that was in his system. He wasn’t sure how long he sat there, hugging the toilet to his chest as he dry heaved into it but he felt so much better when he did. 

Dwight felt to weak to stand, so he sat there in the open stall next to the toilet, his eyes hazy and out of focus. When was Jeff coming? He wanted to suffer at home, even if he was outed to his family. It could be worse, it could be-

“Huh, so this is what smells so good.” Dwight’s hazy eyes look up to see who was speaking. Isn’t that David’s friend? The one that was eyeing him? Dwight’s brain just couldn’t function, he didn’t know what to do or what he wanted to do. He felt uncomfortable though and couldn’t help the instinctive thoughts that came through his brain. This wasn’t his mate. This wasn’t David.

He felt fingers graze the skin of his cheek, startled, he flinched away from the touch but wasn’t able to move his heavy body away from him. The Alpha threw him a feral grin as he grabbed his face, it was firm and felt almost unbreakable and fear cut through the heat haze. He felt disgusted as the boy's eyes roamed his body and Dwight could tell the boy made a decision.

He was going to claim him. 

Dwight could feel himself panic as the boy started to claw at his shirt in a frenzy, ripping buttons off his shirt before his chest was exposed. The boy stopped for just a second, before sliding a finger lightly down his chest before sliding to the right and using his thumb to circle around the nipple. Dwight squirmed at the sensation, uncomfortable but could help his body from reacting from the pleasurable sensation. He tried to push the boy’s wrist away but it only made him angry, the hand on his face moved down to his neck, which gave a squeeze as a warning.

“I’ll break your pretty neck if you try and struggle again, you got that?” He snarled, making Dwight whimper in fear as the boy went for the button of his now slick soaked jeans. He let out a distressed cry as the boy’s hand went down his pants quickly, seeking out the source of his wetness. Dwight gripped the wrist as tight as he could, trying to stop him from going farther which made the boy tightened his grip on his throat and shoved his head into the wall. 

“You struggle, but look how wet you are.” He said, prodding his hole and feeling the slick coming out. “You want this slut. Or else you wouldn’t have come here smelling this good now would you?” Dwight shook his head his grip still firm and felt so disgusting, so violated.

“I don’t- I d-don’t want this, please let go of me!” He cried out, trying but failing to get him off of him by flailing. The boy took his now wet hand out of Dwight’s pants before tugging roughly on his pants. “Please, don’t-Don’t do this please!” He was desperate. Desperate to get him off him, to keep his pants on and save what little dignity he had left. Dwight started to cry, hyperventilating sobs wracking his frame as his pants and underwear were ripped off.

He was going to be raped and there was nothing he could do about it. 

He heard the boy’s zipper go down which only made Dwight cry louder and struggle harder. He felt his head connect with the wall again, making his vision blur and the pressure on his neck tightened to the point where he could cry anymore and saw black spots in his vision. 

“Shut the fuck up, you're ruining it for me.” His tone was menacing, feral and demanding. He was going to get what he wanted, whether Dwight wanted it or not. He could feel the boy’s dick near him and Dwight let out a sound that sounded like he was being murdered. He squeezed his eyes shut, not wanting to see all of this happen. His first time being taken by someone he doesn’t even like, let alone love. 

Suddenly, all that weight and pressure was gone. Torn off of him like a bandaid and he felt like he could truly breathe. He blinked the tears and blurry vision away to see the boy getting absolutely mauled. His brain clicked when he saw the bigger Alpha beating the ever-loving hell out of the other boy. 

It’s David. He came for him. His Alpha came for him. 

The other boy got a few good hits in but David was bigger and stronger and so much angrier. David snarled, teeth bared as he looked like he was going to rip his throat out with them. The smaller Alpha had obviously lost the fight but Dwight couldn’t help but wonder if he was going to lose his life too. 

Dwight whimpered, this was already too much for him to handle. He just wanted his Alpha, he wanted here to hold him.  David stopped to look at Dwight before he looked back at the smaller Alpha. 

“Ya touch ‘im again and I will gut ya like a fish, got it!?” The smaller whimpered before he was literally thrown in the direction of the exit in which he scrambled to get out while tucking himself sloppily back into his pants. There was silence now, but David didn’t pause anything as he took off his jacket to wrap around the Omega and zipping it up. He glanced at the shirt and pants quickly before giving a disgusted noise. Dwight’s clothes were beyond repair, the only thing that was safe were the slick soiled underwear. Dwight was smaller in stature but he was still all long legs, so while David’s clothes would look ridiculously baggy on his friend it wouldn’t help much in terms of cover. 

“Sorry Dwight, yer knickers need ta go back on.” Dwight looked almost disappointed, which made David balk a bit. He felt Dwight’s finger trace doodles on his arm and David couldn’t help the pleasant shudder. He wasn’t as unaffected as he seemed, Dwight smelled close to divine and keeping control was a struggle. With the light touches, wasn’t sure if he could keep himself from-

“You came for me. You always promised you would and you actually came.” Dwight never usually sounded like that. What should have been appreciation came out more seductive with a little bit of awe. 

“Yer my best friend, o’ course I would. I woulda killed ‘im too if ya hadn’t sounded-” like you needed me. David wanted to say but he had a good inkling that was the heat affecting him. He grabbed the soiled briefs, gritting his teeth as a strong wave of his smell came from them. He felt horrified with himself as he had a hard time calming down. His best friend was nearly raped and he’s sitting in front of him, hard as a rock trying to get his underwear on. 

What a friend he was.

His eyes snapped open when Dwight pushed him on his ass, straddling his thigh as he rocked himself into it. David’s breath quickened and swallowed hard. Dwight was never one to have any type of sex appeal but this? This was hot. Something he wasn’t sure his awkward but sweet friend could actually do. 

“David. I want you.” David nearly snapped when he paired those words with a roll of his hips. He looked into his friend's eyes and saw the heat haze had completely clouded his friend's judgment. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t do that to his friend who was unable to consent to any actions forward. God dammit it was hard but if he did anything, he was damn sure it would hit Dwight just as hard as that assholes assault and he would be no better than that pitiful waste of flesh. 

“Fuck mate, I thought you said you were a Beta.” Dwight practically purred when he said mate and his alpha instinct went wild. 

Claim him

Claim him

Claim him

David dug his nails into his palms, feeling the short, but sharp nail cut into his skin. He’s gotta keep in control, that’s his duty as a best friend and as an Alpha. He gently cupped Dwight’s face to get him to look him in the eye, The omega leaning into one of his palms as he looks at the alpha in affection.

“Not here. Not in a dirty bathroom where you almost- Let’s go home.” Dwight perked up in interest, mistaking his words for a promise of relief later to come. As he tried to get Dwight back into his underwear, Dwight had used every dirty tactic in the book to get him riled up. Trying to spread those long legs to give him room in between them, kissing along his neck and jaw. David was going to go into the shower after this and after a good wank he was getting himself a beer, his dad be damned. After getting his underwear on, he lifted his friend up. He almost felt bad that he was holding him like a girl instead of a man but throwing him over his shoulders like a sack of potatoes sounded like a horrible idea in his mind. He stopped for a second, his brain short circuiting. 

Where does he go now?

He wasn’t sure if any Alpha would be stupid enough to take him on if he walked to the office, but he also didn’t want to risk causing a rut. He could always talk to Sally, she would know what to do. Holding him close, he couldn’t help but thank whatever god was out there that they were right next to the nurses office. As he walked in he stopped, seeing a panicked Sally and more surprisingly, Jeff who looked like he was going out of his damn mind. They both snapped into the direction of the door and Jeff almost bristles at the state of his little brother.

“What happened.” Jeff snapped, which made David’s hackles rise. Jeff was big, a bit bigger then he was and in a fight he couldn’t take him on as he was now. He didn’t like the accusation coming from the oldest, but he had to remind himself that Jeff is in pack frenzy. Trying to not to shake at the not so innocent touches that omega in his arms was giving, he explained what had happened and how right now, Dwight needed to get home as he’s in the middle of his heat. 

Jeff came to grab his little brother and David almost wanted to growl but let him go as his Alpha instincts knew that he was no threat. Dwight whined, looking thoroughly distressed as he was taken from David, but Jeff’s strong grip didn’t let him move. 

“I’m going to let your mom know what’s going on. I think you need to head home for a bit after being...Exposed, to a heat. I’m proud of you David for keeping your cool and...I’m so fucking grateful for what you did for Dwight.” David nearly preened at the compliment of the older Alpha. He’s known Jeff for as long as he’s known Dwight and he’s always looked at him for acceptance from him and he feels like he finally got the verbal confirmation he wanted. 

“Thanks Jeff, just keep him safe, yeah?” Jeff nodded, trying to keep a struggling Dwight in his arms. Both Alpha’s were struggling for different reasons at the Omega’s reaction. David saw Sally grab Dwight’s hand and let out a soothing pheromone that made Dwight sink into Jeff’s arms and quiet down. Both Jeff and David blinked in surprise, they were soothed by the smell but not enough to turn them into a wet noodle.

“How did you do that?” David saw Sally’s sad smile and he wanted nothing more than to comfort the kind nurse. He always had a soft spot for Sally, even if she did chew him out good for all the fights he got into. 

“Every Omega mother is able to do this. I was given this ability even though my child was stillborn. Usually it’s used to put fussy children to sleep but it can work with an Omega too.” Jeff let out a noise, horrified that he even asked the question and scrambled to get out an apology.

“It’s alright, it was a long time ago. My husband and I have come to terms and we are hoping to try again.” She said as she gave the awkward alpha a pat on the arm. She turned to David and gave a smile that reminded him of his mum when she was happy with him. 

“I’m going to head back to the office and call your mom to let her know what happened. I’m sure she would be very understanding to your issue.” She said as her, Jeff and Dwight made their way out. David looked at Jeff who looked a little green and looking like he wants to vomit. 

“Jeff, ye okay mate?” Jeff nodded but it was very convincing. In fact he looked like he was about to be even more sick.

“Yeah….Yeah, It’s just-Ugh, Dwight smells awful.” David looked at him in disbelief and Sally let out a laugh, then started to laugh harder at the look on David’s face.

“He- You- What?” Dwight smelt amazing, how could Jeff be so repulsed by his scent when David was pretty much ready to put that smell as a fucking candle. Sally was able to knock her laughter down to a giggle.

“It’s a sibling thing. It’s an instinct to prevent inbreeding within the pack, so Alpha’s are usually repulsed by the smell of their Omega’s siblings heat pheromone.” David almost snorted, that was almost unfortunate. But it made the Alpha in him feel much better at the fact, despite knowing Jeff would absolutely never do something like that to Dwight, ever. There was a burst of Dwight’s smell that practically crippled David as he wanted nothing more then do then claim his best friend but that thought died pretty quickly when Jeff vomited all over his brother.

—

It had been a good 3 days before David was allowed to see Dwight. When his mother found out he was an Omega, her eyes practically turned into stars as she had an Omega pup to baby now. 

But David...Kind of just felt awkward now. He was so heavily affected by Dwight’s pheromones and his control had wavered and nearly snapped. He knew that maybe a talk would be best but that’s never been his strong suit. He’s never been the ‘sit down and talk about your problems.’ Kinda guy. He’s always just ignored it and hoped it got better or goes away completely. He didn’t know how he was going to do that without completely cutting Dwight of his life and that...That thought actually made his heart hurt.

Cutting Dwight out was like losing a limb, but after what happened, he didn’t feel like he could just go back to normal. There was a shift that he knew they both probably couldn’t ignore even if they wanted too. David took a deep breath as he tapped his pencil on the textbook, trying to ignore the thoughts that plagued him. He was finished, but his thoughts weren’t. He got up and went downstairs, seeing his mum do the dishes and belting out a tune so horribly off key that it was grating. 

“ ‘aving fun there mum?” He said, making her turn her head to look at him and she smiled at him cheekily. 

“Only if it annoys you.” She said, her accent was much more posh than him and his dad, but it suited her. 

“Good ta know. Maybe I’ll belt out a tune or two.” He saw her face turn in mock horror and it made him grin. His mum was a character, he couldn’t deny that. 

“For the love of god, please save my ears.” He snickered as he sat at the dining table they kept in their fairly large kitchen. The one here wasn’t as big as the one they had in Manchester, but it was homey and he couldn’t help but love it. 

“Will do.” He said, before he nervously tapped his fingers on the table. He wasn’t sure what to say or how to say it but he really wanted her advice, she was always good at it and he feels that this would be right up her alley in her expertise. “Mum, can I ask ya somethin’ ‘bout Dwight?” She paused for a second, putting down the hand towel she was using to wipe her hands after she washed them and sitting down across from him. 

“Sure, what do you need to know?” David swallowed a little, still nervously tapping the table as he got his barings together. He was never very smooth in his delivery, but his mum always got what he meant.

“Well...After-After the whole thing with Dwight, I-uh, feel kind of awkward. I kind of felt like, I dunno, like a predator or a pervert.” His mother gave him a sympathetic look before putting a comforting hand on his. Feeling more comfortable to continue he let it all out. 

“I feel like after all that happened maybe I should let ‘im go or somethin’. I always thought we’d be okay ‘cause he was a Beta but now that I know ‘e isn’t...I feel like, he’s more at risk being with me then without me.” His mum squeezed his hand before waiting a beat to see if he had anything else to say. When she realized he said his piece she said something.

“Why don’t you think of it from his point of view. What would you think is more embarrassing? The fact that your friend was protective, kind and even though he was affected, he still kept his cool as much as possible to make sure you were safe or the fact that you tried to seduce said friend into mating with you and practically molested him.” David almost regretted asking his mum when she said such a thing, he felt his face go red as he leaned back and his mother started to laugh. 

“He won’t think of you as a bad guy. Not after you saved him from a very real and mentally crippling situation. Then even though he wasn’t in his right mind, you still let him decide for himself whether or not he wants you when he’s coherent enough to consent. If you cut him off because you feel like your a danger without talking to him, he is going to blame himself and his biology all his life.” She ran a thumb on healing knuckles lightly as to not aggravate the bruises and scabs. “You two...Have a bond that is so very rare. I believe that you two thrive better together then you would apart.”

She stopped and something seemed to have fallen into place in her brain. She let go of his hand, seeing him reel it in to grip the edge of the table. 

“What would you do if I told you that Dwight mated with another Alpha that wasn’t you.” Suddenly, there was a loud crunch that sounded through the air and both of them looked surprised when David was holding a chunk of their table in his hand. David looked at the chunk silently his mouth gaped open. He didn’t mean to do that. Just the wave of Jealousy, anger and devastation that had mowed him down so suddenly just made him- 

“My table!” His mother cried out as she looked at the clean break. Looking like she was about to cry. “David, this is a marble table, do you know how expensive this is!?” David blinked at his mother’s antics. She’s more concerned that he broke the table then she was astonished that he broke a marble table with his hands! 

“Uh…’m sorry?” She gave him the nastiest glare he thinks he has ever received and placed the broken pieces on the table, slowly moving away from his distraught mother to the staircase. 

“Go to your room and think about what you’ve done. Think about the reason why you broke my bloody table.” She said in distress, trying to place the broken piece back but only making it worse as the piece started to crumble. 

He quickly made his way up and went into his room before he paused. Then it dawned on him and hit him like a ton of bricks. 

He was in love with his best friend. 

He groaned and collapsed face first into his bed, groaning even louder and longer into the sheets. 

What’s he gonna do now?

—

Later in the early evening did Dwight come over with the most delicate knock on his front door, embarrassed with what had transpired during the first day of his heat and having no issue if they didn’t hear him or weren’t home. But nothing passed David’s mother’s keen ears as she opened the door not seconds later. She looked peeved but pleased at the same time and looking even happier seeing him on her from porch. 

“Oh! Dwight Sweetheart, it’s good to see you again. Feeling better?” Her tone was light and non-judgemental, making Dwight feel a little better, even if he was embarrassed. He felt a little awkward because everyone and their mother were well aware of what transpired. He knew he could hide forever and if he did, the results would end up with him losing his best friend and he needed to apologize anyway. Dwight shot her an awkward smile, not to keen on talking about the most humiliating 3 days of his life.

“Yeah, it’s over now.” Jeff made sure to let him know and made him air out his room today. Jeff looked like he was going to cry in relief once his heat was done. This was the most humiliating heat he will ever experienced because he was assaulted, he tried to seduce his best friend into mating with him AND his brother threw up on him. Not to mention that he’s terrified to go back to school. They had a ‘zero tolerance policy’ towards Omega harassment but that was usually bullshit. Dwight couldn’t help but wonder ... would they blame him for what happened? 

She stepped aside and let him in telling him that David was in his room and also something about a broken table?

He made his was up the stairs and sat in front of David’s room for a second. Taking a deep breath to steal his nerves before knocking on the door. He heard some shuffling on the other side of the door before some footsteps and there was David. 

Handsome, athletic, perfect David. 

Dwight could feel the heat of embarrassment crawl up his neck, redness threatening to cover his face. David looked stunned before he snapped out of it. A little bit of red creeping onto his cheeks at the sight of him. 

“Ah, Dwight,” he said, he himself sounding a little awkward making Dwight feel a bit nervous, David has never felt awkward by him ever in his life. This is definitely a moment he is going to hope for the best but expect the worst. David stepped aside to let him in, this was a talk they had to have alone but Dwight couldn’t help himself in thinking it was a good sign that he still was okay with being alone with him despite what happened and accepted the invitation inside. 

“So,” they both started, grinning awkwardly at each other, and shuffling a little while pausing, giving the other a chance to speak. When neither of them spoke they both tried again.

“Look what happened-“ they both stopped, looked at each other and started to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. Both of them wanted to talk but neither could seem to get it out.

“Do ya wanna go first or me?” Dwight paused for a second, but was determined for David to hear his piece first before making a decision that could change their friendship. 

“I- let me- I should go first. I have a lot to say.” David nodded and sat down on his bed to make himself more comfortable, spreading his legs and resting his forearms on his knees and lacing his fingers together, making eye contact with Dwight so he knew he was paying attention. Dwight swallowed nervously, this was it.

“I...I am so sorry. What I- What I did to you was unacceptable and I couldn’t imagine how you must have felt and how much I humiliated you.” David looked shocked, appalled even, and Dwight inwardly cringed, this was worse then he thou-

“Dwight, you were in the middle of your heat! You weren’t even coherent by the time everything was said and done. Besides, I’m the one who should apologize. I nearly jumped you during your heat like a dog, It was so hard to pull away Dwight and I’m so-”

“You did?” Dwight felt almost giddy, sure, the pheromones are one hell of a drug and it pulls at the basic, most primal part of your instincts but you still have choices, despite that. To have David struggle to control himself usually means he is desperate for sex or he finds him attractive.

“...You sound a little excited for someone who was nearly about to be molested by his best friend.” David said slowly, not awkwardly but more stunned and confused.

“I wouldn’t mind.” 

What. What did he- He didn’t just say that. He didn’t just say that! He sounds like a creep! David’s face dropped in shock. Lips parted and eyebrows shot up to the hair line. Catching Dwight’s eye briefly before the geeky brunettes brown eyes avoided his and a blush turned his face red with humiliation. He wanted to run, just jump out head first out David’s window, bonus points if he broke his neck.

“I-I mean, I uh.” He couldn’t even save his own ass! Nothing was coming out and David still looked like he had been hit head on by a train. God, he really wanted to lose David today, he just kept ruining everything. 

“Say that again.” Dwight’s brain went to a screeching halt as he looked at his best friend who never in his life looked so hopeful. Something seemed to click in Dwight's brain and he couldn’t help but think ...Did he maybe..?

“I wouldn’t have minded,” Dwight said slowly, looking at David’s expression intently, looking for any signs of his face shifting. “If you wanted to mate with me. Especially if it’s you.”

There was a silence, but it was tense. Dwight knew after this, the relationship would change. He could just feel a shift and after that confession he didn’t think they could ever go back even if he wanted to. David moved, it was slow, like he was approaching a spooked animal  then his best friend. He looked like he wanted to touch him but hesitated, almost afraid too. So Dwight decided to do something so uncharacteristically bold of him and grabs his friends hand and he immediately grabbed back. 

“Is...It’s no’ just-” Dwight smiled when he couldn’t get the words out. It made him feel better that he wasn’t the only one that was affected. He wasn’t the only one that was unsure if his feelings were reciprocated. 

“No, it’s not just the sex or the fact that we’re Alpha and Omega. I’ve wanted you to look at me for a long time.” Was all Dwight had to say before a relieved smile spread onto David’s face and Dwight swore he fell in love with him all over again. Dwight however, didn’t expect David pull him into a breathtaking kiss that had blown any and all fantasies he’s ever had out of the water. Dwight returned the kiss fiercely, grabbing the back of his neck, trying to get as close as possible. He felt David’s tongue swipe at his lower lip and he was more than happy to let him in-

“David, I hope you know that table is going to cost m- Oh my god!” As soon as she opened the door she closed it almost immediately. “If I knew you two were going to snog, I would have knocked!” 

The two had practically jumped away when they had realized she had walked in, both their fair complexions going a fetching shade of tomato red and with her comment Dwight had practically turned purple and hid his face while David turned a darker shade of red.

“You should ‘ave knocked regardless!” David’s voice cracked as his pitch went hysterically high, which caused Dwight to giggle in his hands. In David’s embarrassment he shoved Dwight hard enough to where he fell but his giggling turned into outright laughter. It was the most embarrassing thing he was ever caught doing and he could officially say this was the most embarrassing week of his life and he just could help the hysterical laughter. 

“Why are ye laughin’!?” But he couldn’t help but join in the infectious laughter. It might be the most embarrassing week of Dwight’s life but at least he has David and he is going to suffer with him 

—

It had been months after the incident and school for Dwight had become much harder after the whole school found out about him being an Omega and the whole heat debacle. Some kids maliciously teased him, he was called everything under the sun when he passed by. He was humiliated, thankful that he was on the last month of high school and graduation was only a couple weeks away and he had David to come to his rescue. 

He had been waiting by David’s locker and on his phone, not really looking at anything. He was too nervous to look up and see eyes on him or to have someone approach him. However, when he saw sneakers come into his view, he felt his heart drop to stomach. 

“Heya slut, how’re you doing.” Dwight slowly looked up from his phone, trying to stop the obvious shake in his hands. Hunter was back  and unfortunately, only got a three day suspension because it was a ‘hormone based sexual assault.’ And therefore wasn’t ground to anything permanent. Eli and Hunter already didn’t want anything to do with him before but now they wanted him to be as isolated as possible. They had tried to convince David, but they were met with aggression.

“Kinda cute how you’ve been trying to avoid me. Especially after you got me fucking suspended when you were out here trying to get me to fuck you. Trying to play hard to get sweetheart?” Dwight looked at him in horror. Did he genuinely think that or was he trying to discredit him? Maybe trying to taunt him?

Hunter started to crowd Dwight’s space, making the brunette press himself against the locker. He was completely trapped, especially as he caged him in with his arms and leaned in. Dwight could only look up at him helplessly, brown eyes wide and not hiding his fear. He looked away, feeling sweat bead on the back of his neck.

Hunter reveled in Dwight’s fear, finding a fierce sense of power over the smaller boy. His smile was feral, grabbing the omega by the chin making sure that Dwight looked at him and realized who was in charge and who he should respect. 

“Oh no no, look right here sweetheart. It’s rude not to look someone in the eye while talking to you, don’t you know?” His tone was light, but the intent was there. Dwight didn’t know what to do, he didn’t know what Hunter was going to do. Was this just to scare him for getting him in trouble or was this going to be a more coherent part two of what happened a few months ago? His palms started to sweat and he tried not to hyperventilate. God he just wanted this to stop!

Suddenly he felt he could breathe again when Hunter stepped off. No, he didn’t step off, he was dragged off and thrown to the floor by a very, angry David. Dwight had seen his best friend turned boyfriend angry before but this was a different level of anger that he has never seen before.

And it was possibly the most terrifying thing he has ever seen. 

“Ya sure like ta push boundaries don't ya, ya shit.” David’s body was tense, ready for a fight and Hunter knew he had absolutely no chance as he backed away from the stronger Alpha, Scrambling as he crawled backwards. David grabbed the boys hair, who let out a cry as he scratched at David’s hands in panic not expecting to be thrown against the closest locker face first, Hunter’s head recotieting off the metal door as he fell back onto the floor, crying out in pain and holding his face. He let out a high pitched sob as David grabbed his legs and dragged him closer, only to grab him by the collar, wind his fist back and hit him straight into his already bleeding nose. A sickening crack echoed in the air and Dwight heard someone gag at the noise. Dwight looked around to see a crowd gathering, excited and terrified whispers and cheers mixed together, egging David on.

“I told ya once already mate ta stay away from ‘im.” he said sending his fist to the side of his face. “The second time I’ve ‘ad to drag yer fuckin’ body off o’ him but I guess I gotta give ya a reminder.” David hauled Hunter’s weak and sobbing body as he threw the boy into the lockers again, head bouncing off violently before going face first into the floor. Dwight felt queasy at all of the blood. He could feel himself shudder in disgust seeing the other boys head connecting to metal. 

“Don’t touch wha’s mine. Ya got it? Or I’m gonna do so much fuckin’ worse, I swear t’ god.” Dwight’s attention snapped to David at those words. Horrified and absolutely furious at even being mentioned as a thing. He wasn’t a possession, he wasn’t a prize to be won so why…? He paused, David won and he knew he won so why wasn’t he backing off? A light bulb went off in the Omega’s head as he really looked at him. The aggression, the over possessiveness, that wild almost animalistic look in his eye. How could Dwight be so stupid! Of course, he’s going through his first rut!

Dwight nearly ran face first into David’s chest as he stopped him from picking up the now unconscious Alpha and tried to push him back as much as possible.

“Hey hey, c’mon. I’m okay, see.” He smiled nervously as David stared him down, his intent still murderous and with such an intense, angry expression that bored down on him. He could feel himself start to sweat and for the first time in his life, he wasn’t sure that David wasn’t going to hurt him. “Please David, it’s over, he’s not even conscious. Y-you won and that’s enough yeah?” There was a silence all around. Not one person made a peep, to scared to even move, let alone talk. Not when David’s face was cold with such a bone deep rage that they were sure that David was going to maul his childhood friend/Boyfriend. Dwight could feel that panic creeping up his spine with full force, it felt hard to breathe and he could feel his eyes water. He wanted to believe that David would never lay a hand on him but David’s never looked at him that way before and he was so fucking terrified.

“David please. Your scaring me.” His voice was fragile, it cracked and Dwight almost felt ashamed for how much of a coward he sounded like. But he’ll think about it later, first he had to see what David’s next move was. David’s body didn’t quite deflate but he put his hand around the back of Dwight’s neck firmly and brought him closer to his body and keeping his hand there before guiding him roughly with his movements. He snarled at anyone who was close by and students quickly backed up to get as far away from the violent Alpha as they can. Dwight kept his head down, too afraid to look David in the eye in case it sets him off. He heard that first ruts could be rough and violent but this was an extreme. Usually during ruts, Alpha’s show more aggression towards other Alpha’s as a dominance and territory factor, but David was bleeding hostility towards anyone with a pulse. As they reached a classroom, it was majorly empty except for a few gaggles of Beta girl’s. They all stared at the two boys and while Dwight flushed in embarrassment, David bared his teeth.

“Get th’ fuck out.” He snarled, making the girls scramble in their haste. When they all left through the door, David was quick to lock it. Dwight swallowed nervously, fidgeting with his hands, not prepared for what David had in store for him. To say he was nervous was an understatement, he was downright terrified as he has never dealt with David, let alone an Alpha in a full blown rut before. Dwight let out a strangled noise as his waist was grabbed and he was placed on David’s lap not expecting have David ...Nuzzling him?

What?

“I can smell th’ fucker all over ya.” Ah, he’s scenting him. That makes a lot more sense that he’s being more territorial than normal. Dwight thought back to the whole conversation and frowned. Now he was irritated, especially when he felt like he was being considered more of an object then a human being with thoughts and feelings. He understood that David wasn’t really himself but...

“You realize I’m not an object to be claimed right?” His voice held a heavy amount of annoyance which made David stop what he was doing and tightens his grip, nuzzling into his ear.

“No, no’ an object. But yer mine.” David nipped at his ear and tugged, causing a delightful shiver to go through Dwight’s body, the possessive tone not doing him any favours of calming himself down. 

‘Stupid virgin body with stupid virgin needs.’ Dwight thought as David kissed up his neck while grinding himself into Dwight. Dwight’s face went bright red as he felt David’s hard cock pressing up against his most sensitive parts and couldn’t help the needy whine that came from his throat.

“Not, ah! N-not here. Home.” David seemed plenty content to continue what they were doing right here but stopped when Dwight started to struggle.

“Fine.” It came out more of a grumble, maybe because he was going to get want he wanted and not in a place where there were so many smells of other people. As Dwight got up, David was quick behind him. David’s focused onto the back of his boyfriend neck, where his neck and his shoulder meet that was partially hidden by his shirt. That particular spot that he wants to dig his teeth into and- 

Bite. Mark. Claim.

Dwight hurried to unlock the door, trying to scramble out of there trying not to get caught in the middle of their haste and David following close after. As they got into the parking lot, Dwight turned around and opened his hand, Which made David looked at him in confusion and mild irrational.

“Your keys. You’re in no state to drive.” He heard David growl low in his throat, but this time Dwight was fully aware that David wasn’t going to hurt him, so to get what he wanted, he played dirty.

“Please Alpha?” Bingo, right on the money. David paused, his eyes darkening and crowding Dwight’s already limited space, pressing him against the car and planting a searing kiss against his lips while also pressing The keys into Dwight’s hand. He backed off as Dwight ushered him into the car, wanting to get home as soon as possible. The drive home was agonizing, especially when he had David trailing his hand up his thighs and fondling him through his pants. Large hands unbuttoned his pants and brought the zip down exposing black briefs which tented obviously. Dwight could feel sweat drip down the back of his neck, his grip on the steering wheel tightened as he tried his best to keep eyes on the road. They hit a red light and Dwight hit the breaks a little harder than usual when David snuck his hand down his briefs and grabbing his cock. As they waited, Dwight spread his legs, one hand white knuckling the steering wheel and the other on David’s wrist, trying to urge him to go faster. David smirked as his brain came up with the most devious idea, letting go of Dwight’s cock making the Omega cry out in dismay.

“Both hands on the wheel.” David demanded, trying to pull Dwight’s pants and briefs a tad bit further down, making the smaller male lift his hips slightly to help, complying with the demand.

“Don’t look away from the road and don’t you dare take your hands off the wheel.” Dwight was about to ask but the only thing that came out of his mouth was a loud moan as David’s mouth deepthroated him like it was his fucking job. Dwight tried to thrust into David’s mouth but his seatbelt limited his movements and fought the urge to close his eyes as the Alpha bobbed his head, taking Dwight’s cock deeper with no issue. 

‘Oh god, he doesn’t have a gag reflex.’ The realization caused pre-cum to hit the back of David’s throat, only to have him swallow around him causing Dwight to cry out, nearly cumming right then and there. God, he was going to run them off the road at this point, he was going to die with his cock down his best friends’ throat. 

David came up slowly. His cheeks hollowing as he came up and letting Dwight’s cock go with a slick pop. Dwight whined, not sure if he was relieved because now he could drive or disappointed because was desperate to cum.

Dwight nearly cried as he tore into his driveway. Switching off his car and putting it in park hastily, he stuffed his achingly hard back into his pants but didn’t bother to do them up. Knowing that no one was home, he shakily put his key and unlocked it, taking a little more time then it should as David ground his covered bulge into Dwight’s ass. When he was able to fling the door open, he practically dragged the Alpha inside, not bother to lock the door when David lifted him up and carried him to the bedroom. 

David threw Dwight down on his bed, wasting no time in taking everything off and settling between his Omega’s legs and ripping off his clothes. Dwight was wet-no, absolutely soaking, when David brought two fingers down to his hole, burying them knuckle deep into his boyfriend and finger fucking him at a brutal pace, making Dwight sob and beg him for more, the Omega spreading his legs as far as he could go. 

“God, I can’ wait ta fuck ya. So tight and wet get me. Fuck, do ya ‘ave any idea wha’ ya do ta me?” David’s voice was low, coming out as a growl and the words coming out of his mouth were down right sinful.

“’m gonna stuff ya good with m’ cock, fill you with m’ cum and knot ya real good.” He crooked his fingers upwards in a particularly brutal thrust making Dwight sob as he hit the spot inside him directly, making him see stars, crying out his name like a prayer.

“Mm. Tha’s right sweetheart, say m’ name.” David said, giving him a couple more jabs to Dwight’s prostate before taking his fingers out. He flipped him around, tangling his fingers into brown hair, keeping his head down and lifting the Omega’s hips up. Lining his cock to his entrance before thrusting in. Dwight keened as David set a brutal pace, thrusting hard into the spot that made Dwight see stars. Dwight feel tears leak out his eyes at the onslaught of overwhelming pleasure, glasses askew before he ripped them off his face and tossed them. He gripped the head board to ground himself as David fucked him, he couldn’t help the loud moans and cries spilling out of his mouth but it only seemed to spur David further.

“Pl-EASE David, FUCK! I need to cum, please let me cum! Please, please, please!” He felt the Alpha reach around to grab his cock, jerking him in time with his thrusts. “Yes! God yes, I’m so close! Cum in me David,  please knot me!”Dwight babbled, before screaming as he came hard onto his sheets. He could feel David’s knot swell before he felt him fill him up with his cum. The Alpha’s knot catching onto Dwight’s rim and he slowed his thrusts into shallow rut. 

David said something, but Dwight couldn’t hear him for a minute after being fucked stupid. 

“Hmm?” Dwight hummed lazily after getting his senses back.

“I said, Are ya alright luv?” Dwight shot him a sloppy grin, not quite yet able to form words. David gently lifted him onto his lap, making sure not to tug on the knot keeping them together, making Dwight hum again happily cuddling into the broad chest of his Alpha.

“I was pretty rough with ya, especially since ya never done it before. you sure you’re okay?” David’s rut was a lot more vicious than he anticipated. While he knew that Dwight enjoyed himself, he wanted to make sure that he’ll come back down to earth feeling taken care of. 

“Can we do that again?” Dwight said dazed, voice rough from his earlier screaming. David laughed, only to laugh harder at the dopey grin on his boyfriend’s face. 

“I thin’ that could be arranged. My ruts no’ over for ‘nother two days, so you’ll ‘ave yer hands full.” 

“You mean I’ll have my ass full.” David howled, not used to this kind of talk from Dwight and honestly, it was hilarious. David briefly wondered if he created a monster but he can’t say he regretted it. 

“Later. Fer now, we’ll wait till the knot dies down and we’ll ‘ave a shower and eat. Maybe take a short nap until my rut hits me again like a bag of bricks.” Dwight nodded enthusiastically, but felt a little disappointed when he felt the knot start to deflate and cum leaking out. 

“Good thing I’m on the pill, I like the feeling of being full.” Dwight felt a smug grin creep onto his face as he felt his boyfriends cock twitch inside him and hands gripping his waste tightly.

“If ya keep going like tha’, we might ‘ave to push that shower and food back” Dwight ground himself onto the hardening dick inside him, making the Alpha moan low in his throat.

“Or we can go at it in the shower?” David took a deep breath as he pulled the Omega off his cock, his boyfriend groaned unhappily, up on shaky feet as he gave a displeased look to his boyfriend, only to yelp as his ass cheek was slapped.

“Go run th’ shower.” It didn’t take long for it to click and Dwight just smirked at him.

“Yes sir.”

#Kingfield #David King #dwight fairfield #david x dwight #dbd #dbd dwight #dbdb david #SORRY FOR ANY SPELLING AND GRAMMAR MISTAKES #Not beta'd #...HA #Omegaverse #omegaverse dbd #Velshie writes

[madamsixx]

Beyond The Leather Chapter 28: I Want To Be Your Boyfriend

I was out shopping for gifts to buy for Tommy and Heather's wedding. I didn't know what would be a good gift. I mean I always thought to myself what do you buy someone who already has everything? I looked around in a jewelry shop and settled on a his and her watch.

I haven't spoken to Lisa since we had our falling out. I really missed her and our friendship. Maybe later on I will call her. I called Slash today because I wanted to talk to him about Nikki. He said he will pick me up with Duff. Nikki's call last night really got to me. I wasn't able to sleep at all and I feel like such a crappy person for how I treated him. But in my defense I'm just trying to keep my distance from the drugs. But as Lisa pointed out every body is doing. Slash is doing it and I'm meeting up with him today.

I walked outside the store and saw Duff pull up on the side. "Hey Mani your right on time." He says looking at his watch. I got up and ran into the car. The smell of wet socks and weed hit my nose right away.

"Jesus this car stinks." I say as I'm getting in and plugging my nose. "Whine down the windows."

"Well princess Iman you can always walk to our place." Slash laughs sarcastically. "So what did you get Tommy and his wife?"

"I just got his and her watches. I couldn't think of anything else." I shrugged.

"So what's on your mind doll?" Slash asks.

"Well last night Nikki called me and he sounded really paranoid. He said there were intruders in his home hiding in his closet, his washing machine, and even under his bed." I said with a worried voice.

The boys looked at each other and started laughing. "Iman look theres nothing to worry about he'll be fine." Slash laughed.

"No Slash theres nothing to laugh about. I was really scared for him. I mean he called me for a reason. And ok in London when he nearly overdosed he ask Andy McCoy from Hanoi Rocks to bring him to my hotel room."

"Oh did he now." Duff smiled." So what else did you guys do in your hotel room?" They both started laughing again.

"Saul." I grumbled. "Ok ok geez Mani when did you become such a prude." He groaned. "Look Sixx likes you and clearly he trusts you if he's running to you every time he has a problem. And to be honest what's there not to like about you. Your a good person when your not following what your manager is telling you to do."

"What's that suppose to mean?" I hissed.

"It means you need to live a little. You need to break out of the shell she's keeping you in. And your mommy dearest isn't here so you don't need to report to her like your a soldier and she's your commander." Duff buds in.

"Um who told you about me and my moms relationship?" I questioned Duff.

It goes silent in the car.

Slash takes a cigarette out of his pocket and lights it up. "The point is." He laughs hesitantly. "You need to live. Were going out tonight and your coming."

"Ok but I'm only staying-"

"Iman shut the fuck up! Your staying out till what ever time we tell you too!" Slash yelled.

We finally pull up to a complex it was really small. We got out of the car and walked into there home. Again I was hit with the smell of weed, booze, and sweat. Izzy was passed out on the couch and Steven was snorting up coke off of the table.

"Oh shit Mani what the fuck?" He looked at me shocked. "No one told me you were coming. I would have cleaned up." He looked at the boys.

"Hey Steven." I walked over and hugged him.

The place was filthy there were dirty dishes piled up in the sink, half eaten food was scattered on the table, the walls were peeling, and there were clothes everywhere. How could any one live like this.

"So wheres Axl?" I asked. "He's in his room. He's a bit pissed for some reason so don't bother him." Steven warns.

"Ok." I look down at the so called chair that they had in there living room. I didn't want to be rude but at the same time I did. I cringed when I saw a roach run into the inside of the cushion.

"Sit." Duff got up and pushed me onto the couch making me squeal and get up fast in fear that the roach got on me.

"What... what happened." Izzy woke up in panic. The boys started laughing and I was aggravated.

"Say while your here we need a womans touch. Can you clean up the kitchen and cook something for us." Slash asked kicking his feet up on the table while smoking another cigarette.

"Seriously." I laugh humorously. "I came for advice and your asking me to clean up and cook for you?" I crossed my arms.

"The advice you got in the car." Duff spoke up. "So you have to repay us back by at least cleaning the kitchen and cooking something for us." Duff walked over to the fridge and grabbed a beer.

I groaned and walked over to the kitchen. I opened the fridge and noticed there were no groceries in there for me to even cook anything.

"It would help if you guys had groceries." I pointed out.

"Go buy some we'll still be here. Plus were going out tonight. So when we pick you up, bring the groceries with you." Slash laughed.

I scoffed and started heading for the door.

"Uh doll." Duff spoke up. I turned to look at him. "The kitchen isn't finished being cleaned. Even princesses have to do dirty work." He laughed.

Ugh ass holes. I walked back to the kitchen and started cleaning it up for them. Don't ask me why?

Later on at night...

I started getting ready for the night I was going to have out with Guns. I was hoping that Lisa would be there too seeing as there was something going on between her and Axl. And well also I didn't want to be the only girl tagging along.

I put on a silver short dress and put my hair up in a pony tail. I wore matching silver stelletoes and put a small black jacket over my shoulders to finish up my look. Slash said we were going to the Rainbow. At first I was hesitant because Tamara had told me never to go back there again. And here I was getting ready to go there again. I called the office were Tamara was and told her that I would be out with Lisa. She expected me home by 11. I don't know if Slash would approve but theres nothing I can do.

I grabbed my little wrist purse and the groceries bags I promised to buy and headed downstairs. I waited in the lobby until I heard a knock on the door. I saw Slash waving for me to come out. I headed over to him.

"Here are your groceries." I said with a sarcastic voice holding the bags up.

"Thanks doll I'll put those in the trunk." Steven got out of the car and took the groceries from me and put them in the trunk. I got into the car and we took off.

"That's is not an outfit for the Rainbow Iman." Slash chuckled.

"Well that's too bad." I hiss. This dress was made more for a modeling event. But im choosing to wear it at the Rainbow.

"You are certainly going to get picked up by a fellow at the Rainbow." Izzy piped up putting his arms around my shoulder.

"I am not talking to any guys there and I hope they don't talk to me." I warn.

We got to the Rainbow and the boys were already a mess. They got drunk, did drugs, were loud, and grabbing girls left and right. But im not here to judge. But places like this were not my scene. And being here with out any girlfriends or friends was awkward. Especially because I don't drink alcohol or snort drugs. So I just sat randomly at the bar looking at people drunk or high.

"What's a pretty little thing like you doing in a raunchy place like this?"

I turned around to see a guy or could be a girl with wild long hair and plump lips looking at me. "I...I'm sorry what?" I stuttered.

"You don't belong in a place this." He leaned closer to me smiling.

"What ever." I scoffed drinking my cranberry juice and turning away from him.

He chuckled and got up to walk in front of me. "I meant that with no disrespect. I just mean if I was a guy taking you out I would take you to the most extravagant restaurant there is around here." He smiled looking me up and down.

"I'm not into fancy restaurants. And I'm here with my friends. Guns n Roses." I rolled my eyes.

"Oh shit really? I love those guys." He flipped his hair. "I watched them play a couple times down at the Troubadour."

"Are you a rock star?" I asked with raised brows.

"Not yet but I'm gonna be. And when I do become one and I'm making shit loads of cash. I'm going to take you out on a date." He spoke softly.

I scoffed, "I don't think so." I say with attitude and turn away from him again.

He chuckled and walked closer to me. "I think so. I'm a gentleman and ladies such as your self deserve gentleman's." He signaled for the bartender to come to us.

"I don't have a lot but how much is her drink?" He asked the bartender.

"No you don't have to!" I wave my hands.

"$5.75." The bartender spoke. He placed the money down on the table and the bartender took it.

"I could have payed for it myself." I looked at him with annoyance.

"I said I was a gentleman." He smiled.

He's actually really cute.

"My names Sebastian... Sebastian Bach." He smiled.

"Iman Darlington." I smiled back.

"God I hope I see you again." He took my hand and gave me a sweet kiss on the back of it.

I felt like I had butterflies in my stomach. He walked out of the Rainbow with his long hair blowing in the wind. Lord help me.

2:34 am

The boys dropped me back home and I couldn't wait to take off my heels and get undressed. I tip toed to Tamara's room and noticed she wasn't home. I was startled when I heard the phone ring. I walked back to the living room to answer it.

"Hello!"

"You were suppose to be back at the condo for 11!" She snapped.

I sighed. "I'm sorry I went out with Lisa and ended up seeing Slash. We came back late."

"Iman can't you make better friends. I mean really. Use your break to hang out with Rachel. Hopefully some of her stuck up attitude can rub on you." "Anyways I wont be back till tomorrow morning around 10. I can call Jess if you want her to-"

"No I'm good I don't need a babysitter Tammi."

"Ok alright honey call me if anything. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Ok good night." I hung the phone up walking away to my room when I heard it ring again.

"Tammi I said I was ok." I raised my voice.

"Mani."

I paused for a second hearing Nikki's voice. I was hoping he wasn't a paranoid mess today again.

"N...Nikki are you alright?"

"Can you please come over?" His voice sounded shakey.

"To your home? I asked.

"Yes."

"Nikki it's late I can't"

"I need you. Please!" He cried.

"Give me your adress?" ____

The car drove up to the front gate of the house. I couldn't see the house properly because all the lights were off and it was night time. I whined the window down in the back seat and pressed the buzzer.

"Who is it?" What do you want?" He sounded paranoid.

"It's me Nikki. Its Mani." I replied hesitantly.

The gates than opened and we drove in. I told my driver to wait for me because I wasn't going to be long. I got out of the car and headed up his stone steps. I knocked on the door several times but there was no answer. I twisted the door knob and to my pleasure the door was unlocked. I let my self in and the house was dark except for a little light that was beaming through one room.

I walked around the house. It was a single level home and I noticed there three bedrooms and two bathrooms. The house was interior decorated with red velvet hangings, gothic furniture, antiques and gargoyles that loom at you out of the darkness. It was creepy being in here.

I walked towards the light that was coming out of one of the rooms. I slowly opened the door and saw Nikki. He was holding his pillow sobbing listening to his answering machine. I walked closer to him and listened to the machine play two messages.

BEEP

Frankie this is your mom. I know that your busy being a big star and all. I'd just really like to talk to you sometime call me back.

BEEP

You must have gotten the selfish gene from your father. This is selfish what your doing. I just... I just miss you frankie. Talk to me please. Dammit frankie.

End of Messages

It was his mom, my heart was aching for him. I walked to the answer machine and deleted both of the messges.

"Don't listen to a single thing that she says Nikki. It's not worth it she's not worth it. She's not worth crying over." I calmly spoke.

I moved and sat down beside him and started brushing his hair with my fingertips. I felt guilty for the way I treated him when I was in Italy. I could tell now that he was a very hurt an lonely person. I didn't want to just leave him here by himself.

"Why the fuck did you come?" He sneered.

"Because you asked me too Nikki." I snapped back at him.

He scoffed. "So now all of a sudden you care about me?"

I furrowed my brows. "Nik I always cared about you." I whispered.

"No one cares about me!" He raised his voice. "Not my mom, not my dad, not my band mates. And you especially!" He says sobbing and squeezing his pillow tighter.

"Nikki I do care about you, that's why I came when you called. That's why in London when you nearly overdosed I took care of you. I care about you so it scares me." I mumble and look down at the bed.

He lifted himself up on his elbows and looked at me with his piercing green eyes that had tears all over them.

"What scares you?" He asks with confusion.

I stay silent and just stare at the sheets not wanting to look at him. He leaned and shuffled closer to me. He lifted my chin up with his finger for me to look at him. He leaned closer to face me with his lips barley brushing mine.

"What scares you princess?" He asks again.

"How I feel about you." I breathlessly reply.

He leans forward and kisses my lips. He wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me on the bed with our lips still together and lays me down beside him. I kick off my flats and pull my lips away from him catching my breath. He brushes the side of my face with his thumb.

"Mani." He whispers.

"Yes." I reply.

"I want to be your boyfriend."

#motley crue #nikki sixx #vince neil #tommy lee #mick mars #thedirt #model #chanel iman #bwwm wmbw

[shijiujun]

history3 ep 17 summary - we’ve been kind of robbed, but this was a good ep

okay first things first, this episode was fucking INTENSE like usually i’m laughing out loud and everything but today i was more or less silent even during the romantic scenes between jack and zhao zi - those were cute don’t get me wrong but there’s the underlying shady thing that jack is doing - in any case, you guys will both love and hate today’s episode, and if you wanna turn back now and wait for subs etc. to come out, this is the point to do it, otherwise: SUMMARY TIME BELOW!!

CWH + TY/SF confrontation aftermath

we start off first with the scene in the preview, where TY is facing SF while SF explains that LZ is his mother, and CWH, who’s standing a little bit further away with his back faced to them 

also: thank you line tv, for making hong ye totally disappear without you know, letting us know what happened to TY’S PRECIOUS SISTER WHO GOT KIDNAPPED YOU KNOW?! she literally just disappeared - what happened? where’s dao yi? did CWH get his lackeys to send her home by curfew? you know?!!!!

back to the scene - TY is catatonic and just staring angrily into the distance, and CWH is all: “you must be wrong, you must be lying to me, LZ wouldn’t have lied to me”

flashback to the prison visit by LZ and TGD - TGD turns up to visit CWH and CWH looks to be badly beaten up, and TGD obviously looks very guilty but trying to be smiley, he tells CWH that he cooked some of CWH’s fave dishes and brought it for him today and CWH is obviously pretty mad as he accuses TGD of getting the other prisoners inside the prison to beat him up - TGD tells him to calm down but doesn’t have a chance to explain himself, and one can probably understand CWH because i think he wasn’t expecting to be in prison for so long, and he asks TGD when he’s going to get him out, but TGD says that the other gang, Si He Hui, has a hit on him and it’s safer for him to be in prison, and CWH gets mad and yells: “you’re the damn boss of xing tian meng, don’t fucking tell me you have no way to get me out!” basically

that’s when TGD reveals that he brought LZ with him, and rmb that CWH when he decided to take the rap for TGD and go to jail in his stead, he told TGD to take care of LZ and not let him know where he is? WELL THAT DIDN’T HAPPEN OBVIOUSLY - CWH begs for forgiveness from LZ, saying that he didn’t mean to lie to her etc.... and LZ asks: “how could you lie to me?”

and then she says: “i’m pregnant”, and CWH is so happy, and then he looks to TGD who looks back at him with a smile and approving nod - and like 10 seconds later, LZ says: “i went for an abortion, you and i are from different worlds we can’t be together, it’s over”

then CWH goes ballistic and even TGD looks a bit confused and stunned, and LZ walks off and outside the prison she sobs and cries, while TGD is looking at CWH yelling and being dragged off

comment - srsly?!!! so many loopholes that are with this scene srsly

back to the present: TY thinks that SF is lying to him and that even if it was true this changes nothing - he still killed TGD, and he knows this because CWH was actually the one to shoot TY and he remembers it

TY back on that day, he heard two gunshots while he was waiting for TGD, and when he ran up the stairs, he saw TGD and LZ dead already on the ground and TGD holding a gun, and when he yelled for TGD, CWH shot him

CWH says he really wanted to kill them, but before he could do anything, he heard the gunshot, and the first thing he did was call out for LZ and run over to them both and they were alr dead

TY doesn’t believe him and now pulls a gun on CWH, and SF is so desperately holding onto him and trying to stop him - he reasons that if CWH really was the killer, then why would he be standing here like this? SF: “finding the real killer is more important than you venting your anger like this, right?”

so TY runs off, and SF calls TY a gazillion times but TY doesn’t stop and heads straight for the car - SF catches up to him outside of the car but TY pushes him back and shouts: “why are you doing this to me?!”

heart. break.

he gets into the car and drives off, locking SF out of the car (and this is really inappropriate but i wondered - this remote abandoned place does grab or uber or lyft even reach this area for SF to go home you know)

SF+TY - In the house scene where we hoped we’d get bed scene but...

and SF obviously managed to get a ride somehow because he turns up at TY’s house, yelling for him from downstairs and he finds him curled up in the bathtub

they struggle because TY is obviously mad at SF for doing this and he wants to be alone and the truth is hard to bear and he’s trying to get out of SF’s grasp but SF is holding really damn tight and refuses to let him go, he back hugs him and tells him: “shhh... it’s okay, i know how you feel, i really do” and he tries to calm him down, which TY does for a moment, but he struggles again, and SF kisses him to calm him down, and then TY gets on with the program and starts kissing back desperately, and SF is telling him not to do this to himself as TY kisses his way down SF’s body - and then he kisses SF on the lips again, and then he just... stops

and TY goes back to crying on the floor, falling to his knees against the bed as SF holds him

HEART. BREAK. FUCKING HEART BREAK.

Jack + Interpol Chief

jack passes interpol chief a thumb drive containing xing tian meng’s information and details and says that since this mission is done, they should move on to the next one, i.e. dismantling CWH’s drug network

interpol chief says that CWH’s network in cambodia is difficult to dismantle and at this point i think interpol chief is shady as hell and jack seems to be talking in rounds to him, i really don’t believe jack betrayed XTM and TY

and then jack says that now they can, because CWH just invited him into his group and he’ll take the job, and interpol chief and jack shake hands on it

so we get confirmation: jack is NOT a police officer, he’s a mercenary for hire and interpol paid him handsomely for this ‘job’ with XTM and TY in a sense

Zhao Zi + Jack

zhao zi goes home and sees jack’s motorcycle at his door but no jack in sign, and he looks so confused, and then jack was actually crouching behind the gate and pops up and says hi

ZHAO ZI’S face LIGHTS THE FUCK UP and he goes up to jack with his umbrella and im gonna gif this in detail don’t worry, so i won’t say too much here, but anyway he lets jack into the house and jack cooks for zhao zi

and yes, that preview scene happens here, and zhao zi doesn’t really give him an answer until when they’re inside

REMEMBER THE PHOTOS U GUYS WERE GOING CRAY CRAY OVER? we WILL GET THIS SCENE TMR I THINK!!!!

anw zhao zi more or less tells jack that ever since his grandma died, no one is waiting for him at home and when jack turned up earlier, he felt so touched that someone was waiting for him to come home

ALL YOU FIC WRITERS - YOU GUYS CALLED IT!!!!

so anyway tmr it’s likely zz will accept jack’s confession and then hopefully jack won’t just disappear you know!!!

TY+SF in bed, half naked or totally naked I GUESS WE’LL NEVER KNOW

yeah, so they’re in bed naked and okay i’m gonna do a separate post on this about what i think - in any case, yes, no bed scene, and SF and TY are awake, and SF leans over to hug TY

TY: “I’m sorry”

FUCKING BREAK MY HEART YEAH WHY NOT U DO THAT SCRIPT WRITERS

CHIEF+DAUGHTER+TURNING HIMSELF IN

so yes, this happens - i have to say i totally called this, because it really does fit his character, that he would be overridden with guilt and that’ll make him turn himself in 

the scene with his daughter and the daughter’s fiance was really sweet i think, and it really reflected the dilemma and conflict captain shi has with this entire thing, and @ctl-yuejie mentions this to me as well and i agree, and that is that i wish he would’ve thought about SF as well? because SF... i feel like he treats chief as his dad almost and chief dotes on him a lot

so yes, he also emo walks to the police station and oh god okay i really gotta say, i almost cried - chief you’re damn good

and the next day, jun wei runs into the office calling for zhao zi, and says: “shit’s happened, chief turned himself in!!!”

everyone: “WTF?!” except ah zhi, who literally packs up and leaves

Domestic TY and SF

SF comes downstairs in the morning and handsome TY has cooked breakfast for him, and SF looks cautious and apprehensive, but TY has obviously decided not to think about ytd’s whatever, and just insists on SF eating breakfast with him

totally NOT a healthy coping mechanism but what can they do? anw SF sits down to eat, and then he’s trying to convince TY to not go for revenge on his own and to pass the person to the police, and TY, cryptic, says: “you investigate on your side. i’ll investigate on my side”

and then jack comes in and says they’ve caught He Hang, the asshole dude from the episode before, and SF is all: “tang yi, no, you can’t-”

and tang yi compromises more or less on this at least: “once i’m done with him, i’ll pass him to you, promise.”

and then SF acquiesces for a moment, that is until his phone rings and he picks it up and goes: “what are you saying? chief has been arrested for dealing drugs?!”

tang yi looks up. THE END.

and you can feel the stress and tension and the foreboding sense from this interaction and i hope this does not mean anything bad for our beloved TY and SF!!!! in any case... we’ll probably get jack x zz tomorrow IF LINE TV DOESN’T CUT IT OUT YOU KNOW?!!!! and yeah SF gets shot tmr - we see shots of him in that baseball jacket in three scenes currently: a scene with zhao zi where he’s investigating something, another scene where SF’s in a restaurant/cafe and finally the shooting scene

very likely ah zhi is discovered as the culprit tomorrow - although my theory is that interpol chief is in on it as well!!! it’d make sense because now if u think about it, if CWH didn’t pay police chief off, then who did? it has to be someone higher than him in position and interpol chief has a standard bad guy vibe, and this would mean that jack is moving interpol chief into a trap as well!!!! LOVE IT

this was a frickin good episode i think. thank god it was 30 min. any shorter again i would have rioted. but all remains to be seen for tmr!!!!

#history 3: 圈套 #history3圈套 #history 3: trapped #history3: trap #history3 spoilers #this is long guys! #long ep #gifs coming in 20 min