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swordheld · 8 months

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how did u choose your username?

oh, this is a fun one!! i think i considered being swordtold at first, for that very ancient myth vibe of the sword being this narrative tool for adventure and structure and physical time, the parable being passed down through the centuries until it meddles into modern day rhetoric and ideology – a kind of fantastical tool, a spark of magic, of possibility.

i like the arc of the story of a place being physical / having it be held by time and hand alike, wearing with the years and having it become something different to each holder, each reader, each experience fantastical and individual.

having that kind of physicality to it; swordheld is the action of taking up and holding the sword yourself, choosing your own narrative, leading your own story. self-identity has always been something i struggle with (a novel concept i know, i know), so it felt right for this blog, since most of my older blogs before this one have been just me silently reblogging and never really posting anything myself, and i wanted this to be the change to that.

i've always had trouble wranging my social anxiety, esp. on the internet, and previously thought that keeping my words to myself helped keep the timeline cleaner, in a way, no messy thoughts for others to sort through, especially ones i believed no one would want to read anyway? but it never felt right, keeping myself apart from it all, esp. not in the way i so avidly enjoyed reading others' posts and additions, keeping their words close to my heart.

i wanted it to reflect that this was a space i was holding for myself? and i'm a little slow on the uptake sometimes, but this - this i think i got right. i love being here, on this blog, and the joy that it brings me. everyone else enjoying it too has been a wild ride that i never expected, and still surprises me, one that brings a little extra thrill to my heart whenever i think about it.

i had other urls that i liked, but i didn't want this blog to be tied directly to any of my fandom/story interests, since i wanted it to really just be a sort of archive of artistic inspiration and resource, like a little library or museum. i use them now as lil sideblogs of more niche interests now, which is rather lovely.

it hasn't always felt like it fit perfectly, the way that i'd like, but for some reason i can't think of really wanting to change it anytime soon. it feels mythic yet modern in a way that feels like puzzle pieces finally slotting into their place, something my own and inspirational to me, like a lantern i'm holding to make my way by. my own kind of light, if that makes sense – a star i know by name.

#q&a.#birdsong.#all of this is truly just a way to say: it's your blog! it's your party! do what you like if it makes you happy!! (and doesn't hurt anyone!#live your dreams!!!!!! do your own thing truly it is worth it. which feels silly and cheesy inspirational talk vibes but u kno. it's right #thank u for ur question tho !!! it's been so long that i don't really remember exactly what the beginning of it all was?#it wasn't always my url for this blog esp. in the beginning but i've forgotten what that was ghjk so sorry dear anon !#like little flashes of a story in my memory i have to make out / like steam or fog on a window pane. blurry and unclear?#but now it feels more intentional / almost like watercolor! something that mixes itself into a new thing; bright and bursting w/ it all.#i hope this answers ur question nicely all the same tho <3 #i always on habit write out lantern as lanturn so this is an unintentional shout out to one of my fav pokemon love u lanturn !!#some of these things i truly do just write out bc i know it'll make me laugh later if i ever come back to it. lil joys for ur future self !#and that IS a reference to the dickinson poem ' i am out with lanterns looking for myself ' it is in my brain always ! ! thank u ! !

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dementedspeedster · 1 month

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Alright here's my thoughts on a way Thad could have essentially a 'redemption arc' Post-FMA and post death. (Actually in retrospect Post-Rogues Revenge to be specific. I just lump that with FMA. Though I don't accept what happened with Josh Mardon).

This post started as a response/add-on to @radioactive-earthshine's post here, so a bit of its phrasing is in conversation with that post. Though i have done some editing since my first draft of this post.

Please excuse my rambling as I love thinking of Thad from a perspective of post-FMA and post-death and having come back to life for a second chance.

***

Notes:

General Note (before or after you read this post): I guess my big caveat with this idea is that at least some people have to be willing to give Thad a BIG chance and let him try to prove himself in order for it to really work. People gotta be cool with

*1 - Why post Thad's death? - I see Thad's death as a catalyst for him to change or be open to some change because death is such a huge consequence of his actions, but also because 1. Since he's a speedster he's not dead in the traditional way thanks to the Speed Force essentially housing speedsters. And 2. It also gives hm time away from other people and the influence of the Thawnes in order for him to think. He can look at his life and reexamine his own thoughts, feelings, decisions, and essentially his entire life and for once reflect on his own without having to confront someone else, prove himself, or defend his choices in that moment. He can just reflect. Though that won't fix everything. Instead, it is an impetus for Thad to change. (Also just from a comic/visual medium perspective I think it would be cool to delve more into the speedsters who are 'stuck' in the Speed Force. But that's a conversation for another day.)

***

By looking at Thad’s actions post Mercury Falling as being due solely to him and his feelings and desires such as a sense of bitterness, a desire to prove himself, and as a way validate his own existence such as through killing Bart, I can see Thad (preferably post his death)*1 realizing that his previous actions were never going to lead to his own validation. Thad killing Bart while it might have felt good in the moment, ultimately meant nothing and was a bittersweet endeavor because after that moment he loses all purpose and drive with his victory over Bart. He realizes that he was just falling to his own bitterness and the teachings of violence and hatred from the only life he knew.

With the realization that his past actions weren't right, that they didn't truly bring him happiness or validation, he can progress from where he was before. He would no longer be reliant on his hatred toward Bart to propel his life, but instead he would live for himself and live his own life for the first time. He would be free.

Now, just this concept where Thad no longer shackled to his hatred toward Bart in itself could lead to so many different scenarios and paths for Thad as he builds a life for himself (and I could go into that), but specifically in relation to a 'redemption arc' it would lead more specifically toward the tribulations that come with self-discovery and building a life for himself now that he is alive again. Now, I say this specifically with a social perspective in mind with regard to this bit. Because Thad post death would be trying to build a life for himself while people/heroes/most of the Flash Family consider him a villain and still hold his past actions, like killing Bart, against him. It's gonna be hard for him to go through this 'redemption arc' and there are gonna be consequences for Thad's past through how people treat him, but despite that he's still going to try. It's a scenario of self-betterment, but also I think unconsciously he's also trying to make up for what he's done by being a better person than he was.

Setting-wise this arc would be set in the Twin Cities are. Either Keystone City or Central City, so he can't help, but run into members of the Flash Family. But these potential/chance meetings with other Flash Members allows him to make connections; good, bad, and just neutral depending on who it is in the Flash Family he meets and if they're familiar with him.

***

Regarding the topic of redemption when applied to Thad/how he would personally handle the process of redemption/changing:

I think redemption for Thad would be half him fighting his own 'inertia,' his resistance to change. Part of Thad would still be so ingrained in the idea that he is "bad," a villain, and a Thawne (even though he's abandoned the family in every way except name) because that is what he has known for so long and because that is what people are telling him definitively when they see that he's alive again. Thad believes these sorts of things about himself and is also unwilling to let go of his past because it is all he has ever know, so he is fighting the fact that he actually is changing as a person. And this would be further reflected in his actions. He would be consciously putting distance between himself and the Flash family, he would be punishing himself for his previous actions, and SAYING that he has not changed despite how actions would show that he has. Thad's stubborn, but I also think that he would be scared of change as well, and at this part of his life would very much be his own namesake, Inertia.

***

Briefly regarding what his actions would look like at this time as he finds himself and his own life:

I say in this scenario he would overall straddle a sort of anti-hero line though his actions skew toward more heroic, though not to the same degree as heroes. It's not out of a desire to do right for others, but it would be selective in a way and drawing from what he cares about. Like, sure, if he's in the area he will save someone who is in danger, but more specifically I think he would be real conscious of how younger metas are treated, so no one ends up being used like he was in his youth, that they can have a childhood he didn't have, so he would speak up in those kinds of scenarios. Regarding labels: Thad still would probably still stubbornly label himself a villain because of his unwillingness to consciously/overtly change himself as I previously mentioned, but also because of the perspective directed toward him by heroes. Though people can call him whatever they like, but he's still going to do what he think is best.

***

Forgiveness

I agree that forgiveness would be very difficult, but I also think that it would be possible for him to interact with the Flash Family albeit selectively. I think that people like Max and Barry would be the most willing to give Thad a chance and willing to understand that he was used, manipulated, and essentially a child soldier, but also willing to give him a chance and see that he is not the same person he was before if they ran into him again.

Max and Barry are my top contenders for giving Thad a chance because respectively Max understands Thad to a degree. He's experienced who he was a child and the thought he gave to being a hero and potential he had. I don't think he would try to force Thad to become a hero again, but would meet him with some understanding though it might need to be earned somewhat after knowing about Bart's death. I think Max would have to see a bit of a change in Thad for him to fully try to connect with Thad again. It would take a bit of work.

As for Barry, I think he would in general be more open to giving Thad a chance simply if Thad expressed it. I think, in part, it is due to how disconnect Barry sort is from a lot of major events that have happened to his family and in particular Bart. He would be taking Thad more at a face value because he doesn't know Thad or his past. He probably wouldn't know how Thad kidnapped Iris in his youth, and he might not know that Thad is the one who killed Bart (that would probably depend on what he's been informed of by the rest of the family).

Overall, this scenario regardless of who would be willing to give Thad a chance would mostly cause some discord internally for the Flash Family, as they all would have different perspectives of Thad, but also probably regarding perspectives of 'redemption,' whether people can change, and specifically whether Thad can change or if he even deserves a chance.

Ultimately, though what this all would culminate to is either Thad very very VERY slowly becoming sort of a part of the Flash-family or sorta absorbed within the Flash-family circle in the sense that some of the members are willing to give him a chance. (I think there's a touch of hilarity and awkwardness just at the thought of someone like Barry inviting Thad to a holiday dinner. I also think it's also a good way exploring family and the complexities of family and family dynamics when you add someone like Thad to the mix. Kinda like a relative you're not fond of or the black sheep of the family who has history. There's just so many themes that open up when you add Thad to the mix.) It's very much a black sheep scenario. Or that his 'redemption' allows for him to slowly make up for his past. People can feel however they want to feel toward him, they can distrust him still or think it's an act, but the fact he's make strides for himself and as a person slowly becomes undeniable in this scenario as time goes on.

I also think both "outcomes" would allow him to have future appearances and interact with members of the Flash Family as he goes through the process of trying to prove himself/make up for his past.

And that is basically how I would write Thad in a 'redemption' arc. It's not a traditional redemption, but instead it's more focused upon consequences, actively working toward being a better person that you were before, and focused more upon the development than the outcome.

If you have any questions feel free to ask and I'll try my best to answer.

#Inertia #thaddeus thawne #Thad Meta #Thad Thawne #Important #I need to find my other Thad meta posts and see if I've touched on this before.#But that's sorta the concept of this blog but also not exactly.#Thad finding freedom and living his own life/having freedom to make any decision he wants is one of the MAJOR themes of this rp blog.#also me while writing this: I love when society's perceptions of a character influence them.#\o/ i made it make more sense/less ramble-y. thank you subsection headers for existing.#radioactive-earthshine #long post #I am a bit shakey when it comes to Barry but I'm mostly basing this on how he treated Thad in Williamson's run that one time.#I also know I have like a different take on Thad's motivations. I do put more responsibility upon him post Mercury Falling.#whoof this was long idk if I forgot anything but -shrug-

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