#that i didn't have to be like Dean or jensen to be a man

[k-slla]

Like A Wrecking Ball

Gif is just to get your attention- this is not a Demon!Dean fic- I hope I won't disappoint you! 🔥🤭

A/N- had a dream yesterday, listened to THIS SONG and voilà- here you go! 🫣🤭

Pairing- Jensen x Fem!reader

Warnings - 18+ ONLY, semi-public/public fingering, hair pulling, unprotected PinV, breeding kink, dirty talk - if I missed any, let me know:)

W/C: ~1.7 | My Masterlist

Not proofread (only once, instead of my usual 5 times😅)/mistakes are mine! Enjoy!

To some, it might have seemed rude of you to steal Jensen from his party, but he for sure didn't seem too mad about it. How much small talk does one have to make on his own birthday anyway. They'll forgive him for ditching the dinner with you.

You didn't plan this night to end this way. At least not this quickly, but you only had yourself to blame for that. Hadn't you started playing footsie with him during dinner, he probably wouldn't have pulled you to the bathroom either. That's where it all went down. Or in his case, up. But you wouldn't have liked to get caught by someone, so you kept the action in there short. It would have been a thrill for sure, but having both of your parents at the party, the risk of being busted was way too high.

Now you both sat in the backseat of a taxi, panting hard between your kisses, unable to keep your hands to yourselves. Jensen's fingers slid up your thighs under your dress, where you had already drenched your panties. You had to bite hard down on your lower lip to keep your moan under control, when he slipped one finger past your lace underwear, pushing it into your cunt. You grabbed onto his wrist to stop him, even though it was the last thing you wanted to do, it would have been too hard for you to keep quiet if he'd kept going. “Please, Jensen.”

You looked into his eyes. Desire had darkened them almost black. “No, sweetheart.” He laughed at you.

“You know the order. First my fingers.” He whispered, kissing down your neck, and slipping his hand back into your underwear. His lips moved up to kiss the delicate skin under your ear. Tickling of his beard made you pull your shoulder up and squeaked lightly. You didn't let him get away with the teasing, and swiftly unzipped his dress pants, and locked your hand around his cock over the boxers.

Neither of you cared what the driver thought of you two. It was too late for that. This definitely wasn't the first time for neither of you to make out, and even more, in a taxi.

Feeling your hand in his pants, Jensen gasped. “Fuck.”

“You didn't finish telling me the order, babe. Cat got your tongue?” You teased close to his lips as you saw how hard it was for him to get a word out.

He slid his tongue past your lips, claiming what's his, and stealing your breath with the kiss. Jensen pulled his fingers out of you and settled on rubbing your clit through the thin lace cover.

“You know what's coming after my fingers.” He smiled darkly, making your imagination run wild.

Of course you knew the order. The same one he had set in the beginning of your relationship. The order always remained the same.

First he'd use his hands to make you cum on his fingers, depending on his mood, he always didn't let you finish the first round. Jensen loved to see you beg for him until you were in tears.

Then he'd take sweet sweet time to eat you out. That man loved your pussy more than breathing, and when eating you out, he was always generous, making you finish on his face for him to lap up your juices like he was saved from the desert in thirst.

And finally, after all that teasing and torture, he'd finally claim you as his and that was always the sweetest release you waited for the most. Your bodies were just made for each other, you swallowing every inch of him, Jensen always filling your cunt to the brim with his seed. Simply put, starting a family was the next big step in your lives, and both of you made sure that you'd enjoy the journey to the destination to the fullest.

You didn't know how much longer you could hold on. The drive home seemed just infinite. Suddenly Jensen pulled away from you and drew back to the opposite side of the backseat.

Your mind was completely fogged, thinking only about what was waiting for you at home. The need you had for him right now was unbearable. But you didn't have to suffer for long.

The car pulled to a stop in front of your and Jensen's home, and you tried your best to keep your composure getting out of the car. Neither of you touched each other while Jensen unlocked the door. As soon as it closed behind you, you were both at each other again, not bothering to find your way to your bedroom.

You began to quickly peel off layers from Jensen, starting with the jacket while he worked on his pants, until there was nothing left on him. You took a step back, looking up and down on him, feeling the arousal pool between your legs from hunger at the sight of his hard cock. “Jesus, how are you real....” you muttered, holding your breath. He closed the distance between you and grabbed your face into his palms, pulling you into a heated kiss, before he whispered into your ear.

“Was your dress expensive?”

“What? No.” You whispered and pulled away in confusion.

But Jensen's arms around you kept you close to his body and before you knew he had ripped open the back of your dress, making the buttons from the back of it fly across the room.

“Jensen!” You yelped, completely surprised by his action.

“What?” He laughed and his ‘not-so-innocent’ innocent laugh brought a smile to your face, too. Jensen removed your dress, leaving you only in your underwear and thigh high stockings. Running his hands over your ass, he pulled you back into him.

“Fuck, you're damn gorgeous, you know that?” His fingers locked in your hair, pulling on it and making you mewl in the pleasurable pain, moving forward slowly so you'd back into an old oak dresser decorating the hallway.

The sloppy wet kisses he left on your neck tied your tongue. “Jens- please.”

“You're thinking what I'm thinking, babe, hmm?” You knew exactly what he meant and nodded eagerly. Step number two was definitely going to be skipped tonight. Immediately he curled his thumb under your panties and pulled them down.

“Oohh, fuck..” you let out a shuddering breath when a slight coldness touched your wet pussy.

“Up.” Jensen said and helped you onto the dresser, pulling your legs open for him. He didn't waste any time and in a quick move he sheathed himself inside you. Your head fell back in silent scream and nails dug deep into his muscular shoulders. “Oh…oh, fuck...yes...” you breathed out heavily with each of his deep thrust. He picked up speed and it was harder for you to control yourself.

“Don't you hold back now, love....I want you to be heard to the end of the street..” he gently brushed away a strand from your face that had fallen out of your hairdo.

Jensen loved when you couldn't keep quiet. He just enjoyed hearing you cum, the louder the better, whether it would happen on his fingers, all over his face or on his cock with him when he fucked you. He enjoyed all you had to give to him.

You sat up, bringing Jensen's face closer to yours, kissing him hard and pulling his hair, drawing a deep groan out of him. His fingers dug deeper into hips, holding you in place for him to keep pounding harder into your pussy.

Jensen's moves and words started to clash with each other. From his moves it seemed like you were just an inanimate toy for him to rut into, but he still spoke sweetly against your lips. Showering you with affection and praises, softly caressing the rest of your body, that wasn't getting used by him.

“Fuck..love you, baby..love your little pussy..gonna put my babies into you.” his eyes were completely fixated on yours, keeping you from looking away, his moves not faltering yet. “You'll take my babies, won't you?” He breathed out harshly, thumb brushing over your plump lips.

“Yes! Please, babe..Fuck.. I'm getting closer..” you cried out. “I need…ah…” Jensen groaned deeply when he felt your pussy clenching around his cock, trying to keep him inside of you.

Without another warning, you suddenly snapped. “Oh, god, Jensen! Yes!” Your head fell onto his shoulder, completely overtaken by bliss as Jensen kept driving into you.

“You're so good for me, baby, coming on my cock just as I like it.” He gently lifted your head from his shoulder. “Aren’t you a good girl?” His green eyes looked for an answer in yours, but all you managed was to nod.

Just as you, Jensen was breathless. “I’m getting close, sweetie, but I want you cum again..with me. Can you do that?”

“Yes..” you shuddered, and bit your lips, already feeling it build inside you.

Your hands draped over his shoulders, pulling him flush against you. Jensen's nibbed on the delicate skin on your neck. It didn't take long for you to fall apart for him again. But now you were just a soundless mess, waiting for him to cum and fill you.

With a hard groan, he stopped inside you, spilling his seed into your womb. “Oh, god..I love you, Jensen..” you whispered in the crook of his neck.

He pulled away slightly to take a look at you, but your bodies stayed connected. “I love you, too.” He pressed a soft kiss on your swollen lips, relishing the taste of the little bit of gloss that was still left on your lips.

You held onto his face, not allowing him to pull away from the kiss. Although you were satisfied, very much so, the stubble under your fingers made you now miss the feeling of his tongue and his tickling beard between your legs.

“Hmm, what did you say?” You asked with a grin on your face, enjoying the confusion on his. “You're still hungry? Mm, yeah, me too..”

He started laughing and lifted you off the dresser. He tugged on your hair and a little slap landed on your ass before he turned you towards your bedroom. “Go. You know the position I want you in.”

He let go of you and you quickly went to your bedroom to wait for Jensen to follow you. Laying on the bed you let out a big sigh. You had no regrets on leaving the party, and were quite sure neither did he. Your anticipation was high when you heard him walking into the room.

The night was still not over for you.

Tags: @jackles010378 @nescaveckwriter @cevansbaby-dove @deanwinchestersgirl87 @winchesterwild78 @anundyingfidelity @suckitands33

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

#jensen ackles #jensen ackles smut #jensen x reader #jensen x y/n #smut #jensen ackles x reader #jensen ross ackles #spn cast

[815superwolf]

why is jensen ackles so toxic?

i have been a supernatural fan for over ten years and i have known for a while that jensen has never been a fan of destiel, which would be completely fine if he didn't always react uncomfortable and downright disgusted every time someone mentions it and / or the possibility of dean being queer. i have seen him become very defensive and even hostile when asked questions about these things at conventions. to this day jensen (& jared) STILL vehemently call castiel's confession "platonic" and "brotherly" while the writers, showrunners and misha explicitly called it a romantic confession of love.

my problem with jensen's behaviour is that it seems to be rooted in very toxic masculinity and the fragility of it. he has called emotional writing "unmanly" and "effeminate" and "something dean would never say to another man"; he was glad that dean didn't share many scenes with castiel in season 9; he desperately wanted destiel "to go away" and something else that really irks me: so many times when destiel was talked about, he brought up wincest, as if that is in any way the same. he seems to associate queerness with unmanliness, weakness and something to be uncomfortable about.

i can understand that destiel extremists have insulted his wife, insinuated ridiculous things happened between actors etc but this is no excuse for his downright homophobic comments and behaviour. he can also imagine dean however he wants and i know he thinks he understands dean better than anyone but it's so sad to me how much he seems to limit dean in who he could be TO OTHER PEOPLE. who does it harm if a bunch of bi people see themselves in him and his behaviour? i thought jensen understood just how much dean hid from everyone. it makes me sad that he seems to want to forbid other people from interpreting dean differently than he does.

he should really take some time to reflect if dean winchester's non-canon sexuality is really worth coming across homophobic for.

EDIT: i'm not saying jensen can't have his opinion on dean and his sexuality or anything like that, i just wish he didn't react with disgust at other opinions.

#dean winchester #jensen ackles #supernatural #misha collins #castiel #jared padalecki #sam winchester #destiel #deancas #spn

[deangirlsstuff67]

Catching His Eye

Jensen Ackles x Reader

Warning: dry humping, fluffy Jensen

Summary: His distracted and you're the reason.

Authors note: I love Jensen and his family. I mean them no disrespect. This is set in set in a world where Jensen is single. This is a work of fiction for nothing more than entertainment.

---------------------------------------

Life had kicked your ass in every way possible. You still haven't recovered from you two year long relationship ending when he cheated. Not only did he cheat, but with your best friend.

You decided last minute to purchase gold passes for a convention to your favorite show. Supernatural had saved you when you hit rock bottom. Seeing Dean Winchester on your screen always made your bad days better.

Friends and family said you were obsessed, they just didn't understand. Jensen Ackles brought you a character who stole your heart, made you smile, and laugh. So of course you had a crush on the green eyed texan, who the fuck wouldn't.

That's how you ended up here. Arm stretching high in the sky, hoping they will pick you to ask your question. You hated public speaking but couldn't give up a chance to interact with Jensen.

Jared picked you out of sheer luck. An older lady brought you over a microphone. Jensen wasn't looking at you, in his own little universe there on stage.

Clearing your throat you stand up and just speak, "my questions for Jensen." He looks up at the spund of his name. Deep green eyes lock on your y/e/c ones. Your knees threaten to collapse right then and there with just one look at him.

"Umm... I'm just curious what you like to do when your having a bad day. What's your go to to make yourself smile?" There you asked. Shyly smiling you never look away from his gorgeous face.

He's just staring at you. Eyes running all over your face. Jared snaps his fingers in front of his friends face bring him back to the present.

"I'm sorry sweetheart, what's that?"

Jared and the audience laugh. Jensen has an embarrassed smile on his face when he realizes he was too distracted by you to actually hear what you said. Repeating your question for him, he gives you a breathtaking smile before answering.

You sit back down after he's answered you.

-------------------------------------------------------

For the rest of the day you wander around the vendors room. Sit in on different panels. Even make conversation with some amazing people. This is truly the only place where everyone understands your way of thinking and obsession with these characters.

Halfway through the day, you find yourself looking for a restroom. You've managed to take a wrong turn down a hallway and are now completely lost.

You hear him before you see him. Large arms wrap around your frame, pulling you into a dark room, "you're very distracting you know that."

Spinning you around you come face to face with the guy of your dreams. The man whose been there for you without even knowing it. The guy you thank every day exists.

"I never do this. But I can't stop thinking about you and those beautiful sinful lips sweetheart."

Oh shit.

Then he kissed you. Soft and gentle. Testing the water with those soft lips on yours.

Breaking apart, you can see the nervousness written all over his face. Scared that he's crossed a line.

Smiling, a sense of bravery comes over you, and you reach up to drag his face back to yours, capturing his lips in another kiss.

It turns heated quickly. Jensen backs you up against the door. Strong hands rest on your hips. His thick thigh wedge between your legs, resting tightly on your soaked core.

Without thinking you begin to dry hump his leg. Moans slipping past both your lips as you rub yourself closer to an orgasm.

The need for oxygen breaks your kiss. Jensen hooded eyes watching you as your take your pleasure from him.

"That's it baby. Get yourself off on my leg."

Nibbling his way from your throat to your ear, "soak my pants baby."

It's all you need to get you over the edge. Your head knocks against the door as you scream out his name. Cocky grin plastered on his face as he watches you cum.

"Fuck. Sweetheart, that was sexy as hell."

Shyness takes over now. You drop your head to avoid his eyes. He won't have it though. Reaching his hand under your chin he moves you face so you have to look at him.

"Don't hide from me y/n. You have no idea how hot that was."

You gasp when you feel the large, hard bulge he has nestled him his tight jeans. His hand leading yours as he rubs himself with it. Groaning he kisses you again.

"I have to get back before they come looking. Can I please see you again?"

"Yes." It's a whisper, but Jensen hears you. With one more kiss and squeeze of his perfect dick, he sends you in the direction of the bathrooms before disappearing back to his handler.

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Part two coming soon...

Taglist:

@syrma-sensei @yvonneeeee @nancymcl

#jensen ackles #spn fanfic #jensen x you #jensen ackles smut #jensen ackles x you #jensen ackles x female!reader #jensen ackles x reader #jensen ackles x y/n

[lucidlivi]

Chosen For Pleasure (XIV)

Series Masterlist/Warnings

Tag List: @ladysparkles78 @suckitands33 @little-x-wolf @stoneyggirl2 @creative-writing92 @jc-winchester @mrsjenniferwinchester @lessons-of-red @jamerlynn @deans-spinster-witch @kazsrm67 @deans-baby-momma @willow-sages @ritz-hell-hotel @perpetualabsurdity @mhessellund @itzabbyxx @chriszgirl92 @abbybarnesstuff @larrem88 @commonsenseishard @impalaspixie @notsogoofyjelly @hzllxhoundxx @taylortots-world @k-slla @heavenlyackles @spnfamily-j2 @buckybarnes-1917 @foxyjwls007 @spnbaby-67 @readingsins @lauraashley93 @antisocialcorrupt @anixiiee @jackles010378 @alternativeprincess @rosecentury @lelilw1 @cevansbaby-dove @cutedisneygrl @djs8891 @bakugouswh0r3 (thank you to everyone who's been here since the beginning, thank you for always hyping me up and for loving this story! If you want to be added please let me know! It's only going to be a few more parts, so get in while you can!)

I hid a quote in here from one of my favorite tv shows, besides supernatural of course... see if you can catch it! If you can, let's be best friends!

gun violence and mental illness talk at the end of this chapter, please read with caution if it is triggering to you in any way.... if you are struggling with mental health, please reach out! I love you and I'm happy you're here!

"is this really necessary?" I asked Jensen, my eyes befalling the large man in a suit standing next to him.

"yes, until they catch Riley, I'm not risking your safety... besides Mark's a professional, he knows how to be discreet, you won't even know he's around." Jensen said kissing my cheek.

I highly doubt that.

A big burley security man following my every movement.... yeah they'll never see him coming.

I sighed deeply, knowing I'd never be able to talk Jensen out of it.

I stood on my tippy toes connecting his lips with mine. It was a short brief kiss, but it was all I needed to get my heart racing.

"I should go, don't want to be late for my first day as Chief Editor." I said leaning in to Jensen's warm embrace.

"I'll pick you up after work, we have some things to discuss."

"things to discuss, what sort of things?"

"you never answered my question." Jensen smirks knowingly before departing.

It's been a hectic few days, my mind has been on overload. I'm lucky I even remembered to put pants on today. Of course I haven't been able to think about Jensen's proposition of moving in with him yet. I definitely needed to talk to Stella first.

"Mark." I said nodding my head at the tall man.

Mark starts to follow me in to the building quietly.

"who's the big dude?" Stella says as soon as we get inside.

I let out a sigh, so much for being discreet.

I roll my eyes as my coworkers glance at Mark, who's right on my tail.

"Mark.." I answer shrugging my shoulders.

I walked past everyone, going to my new office. I was surprised to see it was completely different than the last time I had been in here.

"I uh redecorated, I thought it would help ya know, so you didn't think about it." Stella said from the doorway.

I looked around the spacious office, every trace of Gray had been erased.

"I love you Stell." I said, a tear in my eye.

I engulfed my best friend in a hug. We stood in each other’s embrace, smiling.

"Sooo do I have to call you Ms. (L/N) now?"

"Oh god please don’t!" I laughed.

I took a deep breath, a comfortable silence fell between us.

"this is crazy right, I mean your life has done a complete three sixty."

I let Stella's words sink in, she was completely right. A few months ago if you'd told me this would be my life, I would've laughed in your face.

"it totally has... sometimes I don't even know how to keep up." I admitted glancing at Mark who stood outside my office like a soldier.

"okay what's up with Mark?" Stella giggled looking at the large man.

"I'm afraid Jensen insists, just until they catch Riley."

"ah yes, the crazy."

"Stella, she's not crazy, she's mentally ill."

I could see Stella noticeably roll her eyes.

"why are you defending her, she literally wants to hurt you (y/n/n)!"

I chewed on my bottom lip nervously as her words sunk in.

I didn't know what Riley's intentions were, but from the damage done to my car, I gathered that we wouldn't be talking over a cup of coffee anytime soon.

"I’m sorry, I know things have been crazy for you, and I just want you to know that I'm here, to listen, to talk, to eat our feelings away with chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream... whatever you need." Stella said giving me a warm smile.

"Jensen asked me to move in with him." I blurted out, the thought weighing heavily on my mind.

"oh my gosh, that's great!" Stella squealed.

"it is?" I question, surprised by her reaction.

"it is if that's what you want?" Stella questions.

I look at the pretty brunette sitting in front of me. I didn't know what I did to deserve her friendship some days.

"I really love him Stella." I whispered.

"then you should do it."

"but I'll miss you.."

"please, you can't get rid of me that easily.."

I engulfed my friend in another hug, squeezing her tightly.

"am I interrupting something?"

I let go of Stella to see David, the owner of the magazine standing in the doorway.

"no, I’m sorry sir." I said smiling.

"just wanted to see how you were settling in, and ask if you made any progress on finding me some new voices?"

I smiled widely at Stella.

"yes sir, in fact this is one right here! Stella is the best journalist we have." I said pushing Stella forward.

Stella nervously smiled at him.

"Stella is it, well why don't we go have a talk then?" David said reaching out a hand for her to shake.

I beamed with pride as I watched them leave the office to settle in the conference room.

I could never repay Stella for how much she does for me, but this was a start.

I heard the office phone start to ring, snapping me out of my daze.

"Ms. (L/N)" I answered.

I heard Jensen chuckle on the other end.

"Ms. (L/N), sounds incredibly sexy when you say it." Jensen purred.

"oh please, I thought I was going to come undone, the first day you said my name." I shot back.

"I was just calling to see how your first day as chief editor is going?"

I felt the smile grace my face.

"good actually, it's kind of making me nervous.." I said picking my nails.

"why is it making you nervous?"

"have you ever heard the term regression to the mean?"

"no.." Jensen said sounding confused.

“It means that life can’t ever be all bad or all good. You know, eventually, things have to come back to the middle.”

"I'm not understanding baby."

"I mean that everything's been okay lately, you know, we're okay, the jobs okay, Stella and I are okay.. the middle."

"so you mean things are about to get really good.." Jensen started

"or really bad." I finished cutting him off.

"sweetheart I think this whole Riley thing has you worked up, everything will be fine, okay, nothing is going to happen." Jensen reassured.

He was probably right. I mean this whole Riley situation did have me pretty worked up.

I just felt it was something more though, like there was something looming over us and I just couldn't figure out what it was.

It could've been my conversation with Elle too. I couldn't get her words out of my head... I just want to know who my competition is.

What did that even mean?

Was she going to try to steal Jensen away from me?

I guess it would be steal Jensen back, considering she had him first.

I didn't realize how quiet I was until I heard Jensen's smooth voice through the speaker.

"baby talk to me, what's going through your mind?"

"I think you're right, I'm just a little overwhelmed, I guess Mark wasn't such a bad thing." I said staring at the man who hasn't moved from the entrance of my office.

"see I told you..." Jensen said in a teasing tone.

"I don't have to take him everywhere do I? He's not coming home with me!"

I heard Jensen's hearty laugh boom through the speaker.

"he's definitely NOT going home with you.. he's just for when I can't be with you to protect you."

"my hero.." I swooned.

Jensen laughed again.

"I miss you already." I whispered.

"oh god I sound so needy." I added quickly.

"I miss you too.."

"so I uh talked to Stella about your proposition." I said biting my thumb nail.

"oh yeah? and how did that go?"

"good.." I answered being vague in my answer purposely.

"and do you have an answer for me?"

"yeah..." I whispered not being able to fight the smile on my face.

"well get on with it then, c'mon woman you're killing me here." Jensen whined.

"I mean, I'll have to get some things from the apartment." I said.

"so that's a yes?"

"yes Jensen, I'll move in with you."

****************************************************

"Are you going home? I'm going to grab some things and stay at Jensen's tonight." I told Stella as we gathered our things, the end of our day approaching.

"No, Matt's taking me out to dinner to celebrate my new promotion, thanks for that by the way! I can't believe I'm the new lead journalist!" Stella squealed making me smile.

"I didn't do anything, that was all you."

"Still, I couldn't have gotten it without you putting in a word to David for me."

"It's the least I could do, you do so much for me."

Stella wrapped her arms around me squeezing me tightly for the third time this day.

I've been so caught up in all things Jensen that I realized I really missed my friend, and I was so lucky to have her in my corner.

"woah, that's my woman."

Stella let go, throwing a look to Jensen who now stood in the doorway to my office. I didn’t see Mark anymore, Jensen must have dismissed him.

"nice office..." Jensen admired.

"I redecorated, thank you very much." Stella piped up.

"so when I need any redecorating done, I'll know who to call." Jensen smirked.

Stella glanced at her phone quickly before meeting my eyes again.

"I think Matt's here, I'll see you soon.." Stella said squeezing my hand before going over to Jensen.

"Jensen, take care of her... if you don't I'll chop your dick off." Stella threatened.

"Stella!" I exclaimed mortified.

Jensen just laughed in response.

"You have my word Stella, I mean I would kind of like to keep my dick." Jensen said making me roll my eyes at the pair.

"see you tomorrow." Stella said with a final wave.

Jensen smiled at her shaking his head. He came over to me wrapping me in a hug.

“she’s something..” Jensen laughed.

“you have no idea… are you ready to go home?” I asked cocking my eyebrow.

“as long as I’m with you I am home.” Jensen said.

I rolled my eyes at his line.

“that was incredibly cheesy.” I laughed.

“I thought it was romantic… even a little bit?” Jensen pouted.

“okay just a little bit.”

Jensen smiled, leaning down to pull me in for a kiss. I took a shaky breath as he connected our lips. I felt electricity pulsating through my skin as his lips moved on mine.

“I love you.” He said as he pulled away.

“I love you more.” I whispered.

Jensen gave me another quick peck.

“Impossible.”

Jensen grabbed my bag with one hand, grasping mine with other, as he led us out of the office. Cole stood by the car waiting with an open door.

“Ms. (L/N).” Cole nodded as I slid in.

“You really need to give him a break..” I said laughing at Jensen.

“Cole doesn’t need a break, do ya Cole?”

“no Mr. Ackles.”

“Cole you can be honest I know this one’s a lot to deal with.” I said smacking Jensen’s chest playfully.

“between you and me ma’am.” Cole started giving Jensen a smirk.

I laughed at Jensen’s flustered expression.

Cole pulled up to our apartment, quickly getting out so he could open my door. Jensen shuffled out after me. As soon as we stepped out of the car, his phone started ringing. He pulled it out checking the caller ID.

“It’s Jared.”

“you can take it.. I’m just going to grab some toiletries and a couple outfits, I’ll be right back.” I said kissing his cheek.

Jensen offered me a grateful smile as he answered his phone.

I unlocked the door, before grabbing our mail and going inside. I would have to remember to reroute my mail to the new address. I threw the mail on the counter, wanting to pack my things before I went through it.

I grabbed my overnight bag throwing articles of clothing in it before going to our bathroom. I made sure to grab my toothbrush, hairbrush and the other essentials. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror breathing a deep sigh.

I was really doing this.

I threw the rest of my stuff in my bag, zipping it up and walking back in to the kitchen. I set my bag down grabbing the mail to sift through it.

I turned around, feeling my blood run cold.

It was her.

Riley.

I gasped at the sight of her dropping the mail.

I didn’t know how she got in, the door was still locked.

I could see from the look on her face that she was distressed. I was afraid, but I wouldn’t let her see. I needed to remain calm.

“Riley… uh Jensen’s right outside, we could go see him.” I hesitantly said, holding my hands out so she could see I meant her no harm.

I shuddered as she pulled a gun from her pocket.

“I came to see you.”

I shivered, her voice was haunting, like she was in grave pain. I didn’t take my eyes off the gun she held to her side.

“okay..” I breathed.

“Jensen told me what happened Riley, I know you’re in a lot of pain, and I’m so sorry.. Jensen talks about you still, he cares about you.” I said trying to diffuse the situation.

I flinched as a warning shot rang out. I could feel the breath getting caught in my chest as I feared for my life.

“DON’T LIE!” Riley yelled, bringing the gun up so it was now pointed directly at me.

“just tell me what you have that I don’t.” she cried.

“nothing Riley, I’m nothing.” I pleaded.

“but he kisses you, and sleeps in your bed.” Riley said.

I felt the color drain from my face.

“how do you know that?”

“I saw you, I watched you… I know you love him but I do too.” Riley said eerily calm.

I thought back to the night when Jensen slept over. I thought I had seen someone but chalked it up to my imagination playing tricks on me… but now I know it was her watching us.

“Riley why don’t you put the gun down.” I begged trying to maintain my composure.

“you don’t even know him, what he likes, you don’t give him what he wants, he’s just pretending with you and he’ll get tired of pretending!” Riley growled.

Suddenly Jensen burst in the door followed by Cole.

Riley didn’t move the gun from me.

I could see the fear in Jensen’s eyes as he glanced at me.

“Riley..”

Jensen pointed at himself, asking Riley to turn the gun on him. Riley glanced between me and Jensen before turning the gun his way.

“Jensen don’t.” I cried, letting a few tears slip out.

Jensen held his hand out quieting me.

“I know you don’t want to hurt me Riley.” Jensen said, taking a step closer to her.

Riley breathed a heavy sigh as Jensen reached out wrapping his hand around the barrel of the gun. He yanked it out of her hands, switching the safety on, and putting it in his pocket.

“come here.” Jensen said reaching his arms out.

Riley collapsed in his arms crying. Jensen held her stroking her hair.

“Cole get (y/n) out of here, take her back home.” Jensen said.

Cole took a step towards me, but I took a step back.

“I’m not going anywhere.” I said not wanting to leave Jensen alone.

“(y/n) for once just do what I ask!” Jensen snapped.

I felt the tears roll down my cheeks as I grabbed Cole’s hand allowing him to lead me outside to the car. He opened the door gesturing for me to get in.

I dropped his hand stepping away from the car. I gave Cole a look, and started to walk down the street.

“Ms. (L/N) please.”

“stop it Cole.” I growled walking away.

I didn’t know where I was going, I just had to get away. I felt the tears staining my cheeks as I walked.

It was too much.

It was all too much.

for once just do what I ask..

he’s just pretending with you, and he’ll get tired of pretending..

I covered my ears trying to drown out the loud voices that were screaming at me.

I collapsed on the sidewalk, bringing my knees to my chest and sobbing.

this is what I meant.

regression to the mean..

Author Note:

I’m sorry for breaking your hearts again! Part fifteen will reveal a lot, so make sure you stick around to find out! If you liked this part please indicate so with a heart, comment, reblog, or a follow! It really is motivating! I appreciate you all!

xoxoxo

Liv

#jensen ackles #jensen ackles x reader #jensen ackles imagine #jensen ackles x you #jensen ackles x female!reader #jensen x reader #jensen ackles fanfiction #dean winchester #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester x reader #jensen ackles preference #jensen ackles series #jensen ackles smut #supernatural #supernatural smut #jensen x you #spn #dean winchester x you #jensen ackles fic

[dean-winchester-is-a-warrior]

The Dangers of Hope Ch. 2

Series Summary: When Y/N shows up at Camp Chitaqua with her little girl in tow, her bloodshot eyes leave no doubt that she's infected. Or is she? Everything Dean has come to know for certain over the last five hellish years, is about to be challenged.

Pairings/Characters in the series: Endverse!Dean x Reader, Emma (OFC), Castiel, Sam Winchester, Lucifer, Michael, Zachariah, Risa, Johnston (OMC), Patrick (OMC), Theresa (OFC),other survivors and soldiers.

Series Explicit 18 +/Warnings: Show level violence, some gore, angst, smut, fluff all the usual for a series of mine. ❤️ Endverse!Dean (that's a warning for his anger and callousness as well as his extreme hotness. 😁) Each chapter will have their own specific warnings.

Chapter Warnings: Not too much. A mention of recurring nightmares, some talk of fears.

Word Count: 4,240

A/N: So, I've had this idea for quite a while. Basically since I watched The Last of Us. I loved Pedro in the role of Joel, but I kept thinking how incredible Jensen would have been. Which then made me think of how amazing he was as Endverse!Dean which then led me to this idea. Lol! I've stolen the premise of Ellie's storyline from TLOU, but made her a grown up, a reader insert, and a love interest for Dean.

If you've never seen TLOU, don't worry - you don't need to have seen it to understand this story. 😊

I've taken some liberties with the Endverse in my story, changed a few things from canon, but kept lots of things too.

I sincerely hope you enjoy the story. It will be ten chapters and I will do my very best to post one chapter every weekend. ❤️

A/N 2: Thank you SO much to everyone who was so kind and gave such a lovely reception to the first chapter of the series. I hope you enjoy this new chapter too! ❤️

Series Master List || Tag Lists

The dividers used here were created by @saradika .

The big, wide log cabin seemed so completely empty after Dean Winchester left, as though his presence alone was what had filled it.

The blue-eyed man - Castiel - ran after him quickly, shouting an order to a guard outside to let no one go in. 

So Y/N sat completely still, listening to the muffled sounds of camp life happening on the other side of the pine walls. Her exhausted brain was trying to comprehend what had happened, trying to piece it all together.

The first person she'd encountered had been the woman, Risa. She and another soldier had been guarding the border of the camp when Y/N and Emma finally stumbled out of the forest.

Y/N was fairly certain she would have been shot on site if Emma hadn't been there. Instead, their hesitation gave her the chance to swear up and down that, despite appearances, she wasn't a Croat.

The two soldiers had eye-balled each other and Risa had finally told the other guard to stay at the outpost. 

“The Boss is still out on the raid. I'm taking them to Castiel.”

She'd pulled the heavy chains and manacles out of the guard post shack, and brought Y/N, cuffed and bound, to see Castiel. She’d met with him in the big cabin, tying Y/N to the table and then explaining things to him. He'd seemed a bit out of it at first, but then seemed to sober up quickly when Risa explained the situation to him a second time. Then he examined Y/N and made her tell him the story again. His face got progressively more dumbstruck as she spoke.

When he was informed that the Boss was back, he'd told Risa to take Emma away somewhere safe while they all talked.

Now, in the big, lonely cabin Y/N had to shake her head. She’d been so certain, in the end, that she was going to die. But Dean had walked away and left her breathing.

Just another miracle that somehow kept her alive for one more day.

The evening wore on and the light began to disappear, leaving only a dusky blue twilight inside the cabin. She didn't like the night time and the dark. It was a fear that had started with the poltergeist when she was sixteen - when every time she turned off the light and closed her eyes, something evil emerged to cause her pain and terrorize her in the dark.

Before long, the very last of the twilight left the room, and unknown, unkind darkness loomed all around her, and she began to feel the panic rising. But suddenly, just before it could take hold completely, Dean strode through the door, carrying a bright lantern that banished the dark. She breathed a sigh of relief, thankful to see him in spite of everything.

He moved to stand directly in front of her, almost exactly where he stood when he’d elected not to shoot her. She looked up at him and gave a slight smile, not knowing what else she could do. Then she thought to ask the question foremost on her mind.

“Can I see Emma? I'd like her to know I'm safe.”

“No.” He said, shooting down the request without hesitation. He moved over to a metal folding chair that sat at the end of one of the tables and pointed at it.

“I'm gonna sit right here, all night, not sleeping. And if you so much as twitch? I promise I'll put you down.”

Y/N still couldn't help but appreciate the light he'd brought in for her, and the fact that she was still breathing, so she gave another half smile. “Okey dokey.”

He looked briefly taken aback by her response before his scowl returned. He plunked himself down on the chair and folded his arms across his chest, sitting up ramrod straight. It didn't look very comfortable.

But then, her spot on the hard floor, chained to the table, wasn't all that comfy either. But she decided she was grateful that the length of the chain allowed her to comfortably move her arms around. That was something.

She leaned back against the wide metal leg of the table and tried to relax. But soon her active mind was wandering and she stole a glance at Dean, wondering about how very different he was now. Of course twelve years was a long time in the best of circumstances. Twelve years spent fighting monsters and battling through an apocalypse was bound to change a person. 

As she stared at him he turned his head and caught her at it outright. She blushed slightly and decided to cover with a question. “Can I see Emma tomorrow?”

“No.” Dean said before going back to staring at the far wall.

His outright refusal was frustrating. But she worried that arguing with him might be considered “twitching”, so she kept her mouth closed.

The silence stretched out again and made Y/N antsy. She was used to Emma’s little-girl-babbling, her singing, and just her general five-year-old noisiness. The camp was mostly silent on the other side of the wall as well, only the crickets could be heard, playing their creaky songs.

Her eyes once again settled on the only interesting thing in the room, Dean. She tried to be less obvious about staring this time, but realized she’d failed when he spoke harshly without looking in her direction.

“Why are you staring at me?” His voice was full of annoyance.

“I’m not.” She said quickly and unconvincingly.

He finally looked at her and his face was cold and angry. She remembered that he used to have a really bright, beautiful smile. 

“Why can’t I see Emma?” She asked, aware she was probably pushing buttons she shouldn't.

Dean ignored her and slowly looked away again. Y/N huffed out an angry puff of air and despite her worries about riling him, decided to argue. “She’s my daughter. I just want to make sure she’s okay, and let her know that I’m okay too.”

He remained silent and Y/N’s voice became desperate. “Please!”

Dean swung his head back to look at her angrily. “Look, I’m probably going to end up shooting you. When that happens, do you want her to have to go through all of it again? Or worse, have her sitting in the room when you turn and I have to take you out?”

Y/N felt a lump form in her throat, but she shook her head. “No.” She said softly.

Dean lifted his hand and then dropped it, looking away again. “So okay. Then shut up about it.”

Y/N was only a little offended and sighed slowly. After being quiet for a minute she spoke with another frustrated sigh. 

“Okay, but do we just have to sit here? This is boring.” Her eyes lit up slightly. “We could play twenty questions.”

Dean looked back at her and his expression was finally registering as something other than angry or blank. He obviously thought she was nuts. 

She shrugged. “Just to pass the time.” When he just continued to stare, she shook her head. “No? How ‘bout the alphabet game?”

Dean’s perplexed expression fell back into his usual scowl but Y/N trudged on anyway. “The alphabet game is where you pick a subject, like countries of the world, or 80s action movies or something, and then go back and forth, each having to come up with something that matches the next letter. Like if I said ‘Action Jackson’, you’d say…’Beverly Hills Cop’, then I’d say-”

“Shut. Up.” Dean said succinctly. His mossy green eyes were dark, and quiet frustration oozed out of him.

Y/N slumped back against the table leg. “Sorry. I talk when I'm nervous, and when I’m bored. So, it’s a double whammy here. Hence the motor mouth.”

“Go to sleep.” Dean said in a clipped tone.

“I have too much adrenaline for sleep. I WAS almost shot today, after all.”

Dean’s jaw clenched before he looked away from her again and leaned back slightly in the chair. “If you don’t shut up and go to sleep I may change my mind about the ‘almost’ part.” 

Y/N bit her lip trying to suppress a giggle as exhaustion and adrenaline combined with her twisted sense of humor. The result was a loud snort that had Dean once again looking at her like she was nuts.

She smiled at him, wishing he’d smile back, and shared the movie quote that was tickling her funny bone. 

“Good night, Westley. Good work, sleep well. I’ll most likely kill you in the morning.”

When Dean just stared at her silently, she shook her head. “Princess Bride? No? It’s a classic.” 

She swore she saw his hand move towards the holster on his thigh and she raised her hands in surrender. “Okay. Sorry. I’ll be quiet now.”

Dean stared a while longer at her and she wondered if he really was contemplating shooting her, until he finally looked away and settled himself more comfortably in the chair.

She sighed. It was gonna be a long night.

***

Y/N was floating down a river in a little canoe. Emma was sitting across from her and talking to her, though she was still a baby. 

“We’re lost, Mommy.” She said and Y/N shook her head. She had to keep her baby safe and that included keeping her safe from the truth.

“No we’re okay, baby.” Y/N said as the river got choppy and sharp rocks jutted out, waiting for them around every bend. They careened straight towards one, and Y/N could do nothing to steer the canoe around it; the one oar she had was mostly turning her in circles. They smashed into the rocks and the boat began filling with water.

“Mommy, the water is coming up.” Said Baby Emma. “We’re gonna drown.”

“No, we won’t baby. I won’t let us.”

Y/N tried to scoop the water out with her hands, but it was just too fast. They were sinking. Y/N grabbed for Emma but the baby began to float away. 

“Emma!” Y/N called out to her daughter as she floated farther and farther away. But even though she was almost a mile away, Y/N could still hear her little voice right in her ear.

“You lost me, mommy. I can’t come back, I’m lost.”

“No! I didn’t!” Y/N cried out, jerking awake.

The cabin had sunshine pouring in through the east-facing windows. It was morning, she was alive, and so was Emma, she reassured herself, she was just out somewhere in the camp. Her recurring nightmare could be left in the shadows. She took a deep breath and looked over at Dean. He was staring intensely at her. She raised her hands.

“Sorry, not ‘twitching’, just a bad dream.”

Dean still didn’t blink. It was unnerving. “Did you really not sleep at all?” Y/N asked.

“Said I wouldn’t.”

Y/N took in his posture in the chair, straight and alert; he’d barely moved an inch all night. It made her smile and shake her head.

“Huh.”

Dean’s scowl was firmly in place. “What?” He questioned.

Y/N shrugged. “No, nothing. It’s just good to see that things haven’t changed much, after all.”

Dean scoffed. “Woman, everything in the world has changed.” He looked away from her. “And it just keeps changing every day.”

“Maybe,” Y/N conceded. “But yet here you are, all these years later, and you’re still protecting people.” 

His head swung back towards her and he seemed offended. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Y/N lifted a manacled wrist and gestured beyond the cabin. “You sat up all night, in what I can only assume to be the world’s most uncomfortable chair, to make sure that everyone in the camp was safe from a potential monster.” She shrugged again. “Because you’re still protecting people.”

“That is not what this is.” Dean said angrily, and Y/N raised an eyebrow.

“No?”

“No.” Dean reiterated. “I am the leader of this camp, and leaders do their own dirty work. If you turn, I’m gonna be the one to shoot you.”

“To save your soldiers having to do it.” Y/N said with a nod. 

“No!” Dean barked. It surprised her that he was so angry about what she was saying. It was obvious to her. The hunter she’d known may have turned into a soldier, may have gotten a little harder, but from everything she’d seen, he was still Dean Winchester underneath.

His face was a snarl now, though. “Look, I don’t want you thinking I’m some kind of benevolent nursemaid here.” Dean tried to explain. “Everyone in camp has jobs, has their roles. It’s how we’ve all survived so far. My role is to keep the camp guarded. And I do that so everyone else can perform their roles. It’s simply a matter of survival. If you turn into a Croat and start killing folks, that lowers our numbers, makes us all more vulnerable. That’s all this is. So don’t go thinking I’m some kind of bleeding heart. When the time comes, I will take you down.”

Y/N nodded slowly. “Okay.” She said calmly. She didn’t really believe a word of it. But she wouldn’t argue with his need to make her see him as deadly. 

“I mean it. I won’t hesitate.” Dean said coldly.

“But,” Y/N looked at him and gave a small smile, “you already did. Hesitate, I mean.”

Dean’s jaw ticked. “Are you taunting me?” His voice was low and very menacing. 

Y/N raised her hands, making the chains rattle. “No!” She denied vehemently. “I’m not taunting you, I’m thanking you. That hesitation saved my life.”

Dean’s glare was hot and angry. “Well, like I told you, things change real quick these days, so don’t tempt me.”

He turned away from her again and Y/N lowered her hands. His attitude was not what she’d expected. He honestly seemed insulted that she’d implied that he was a good man who made it his mission to keep people safe.

Silence descended again, until Y/N began shifting around, noisily rattling her chains. 

“Stay still.” Dean barked without looking at her.

“I can’t.” Y/N said, slightly embarrassed. “I…I have to…pee.”

Dean turned to look at her for a moment and then shrugged. “Go ahead.” 

Y/N’s face scrunched up in disgust. “Ew.” When Dean made no move to rectify the situation, she let out an annoyed huff. “Do you at least have a bucket?”

Dean continued to stare at her for a long time, before calling out. “Johnston!”

A thin man holding a rifle stepped in the door. He’d clearly been standing just outside. “Yes sir?”

“I need your help with the latrine.”

“Sir?” The young man’s face was confused and Y/N snorted out a laugh. 

Dean shot her a dirty look. “Shut up.” He ordered. She bit her lip to stifle her smile. 

He turned back to the soldier. “With her, Johnston.” He said, pointing at Y/N. “I need help taking her to the latrines. I’m gonna hold her chains, so I need you to keep a gun on her.”

“Oh!” The man was clearly very relieved. “Yes sir.”

Dean stood up and took a key from the inside pocket of his green canvas jacket, bending to unlock the padlock that kept Y/N attached to the table. He pulled her to her feet and she stumbled into him, her legs being slightly wobbly and asleep from her uncomfortable position.

“Sorry.” She said, suddenly shy as she stood so near him. She looked up into his face and was slightly mesmerized by his shining emerald eyes and the dusting of freckles on his cheeks. He really was remarkably beautiful, moreso today than when he’d come to save her all those years ago.

Dean just grunted and stepped back, holding her thick chains in his big hand easily. He took the lead, his long strides forcing her to jog along behind him or risk being dragged all the way.

The camp was still just waking up and she could smell coffee brewing around the campfires where people sat sleepily rubbing their eyes and then popping them wide open as the strange procession passed by them. She tried to smile at them, but the fear on their faces made her remember her bloodshot eyes, and she lowered her head. They probably thought their leader had gone crazy, dragging a Croat around on a leash.

After a few minutes of walking they reached a row of outhouses, plain but well built. Dean pointed to the one on the end of the row and Y/N went in. She stopped just inside the door, looking back at Dean.

“Are you going to let go of the chain?”

“No.”

She frowned and waved her hand at the wooden door. “I can’t close the door if the chain is in the way.”

Dean just shrugged in answer.

Y/N’s face was imploring. “Come on.”

Dean said nothing.

Y/N gritted her teeth. “Well could you at least look the other way?”

“No.”

Y/N rolled her eyes and let out a little growl of frustration. “For pete’s sake, I am in chains, and you’re holding on to them! Where the hell am I gonna go if you look away for a minute?”

Dean stared at her a moment longer before finally, begrudgingly, turning his head. 

“Thanks.” Y/N mumbled, trying to pull the door over as far as it would go with the chain stopping it. 

When she was finished, she came out with pink cheeks. There was no way both men hadn’t heard her peeing. There were definitely some real indignities involved in people thinking you were a monster.

When they got back to the cabin, Dean was locking Y/N back up to the table, crouched down beside her, when her stomach rumbled from hunger. He ignored it, double checking her manacles before walking out and leaving Johnston watching over her with his rifle.

A few minutes later though, a young girl, probably no more than thirteen, came in with a bowl of oatmeal and some canned oranges. She also had a cold glass of water on the tray and Y/N groaned out loud. She hadn’t realized how thirsty she was until she saw it there. Her groan seemed to startle the girl who was approaching Y/N with considerable trepidation.

Y/N tried smiling again, knowing there was nothing she could do to change her bloodshot eyes, but hoping she could still show kindness in them. 

“Hi.” She said softly. “My name is Y/N, what’s yours?”

“Theresa.” The girl said, as she came a little closer. “Boss told mom to make you some breakfast and she sent me to bring it.”

Y/N nodded. “Thank you so much. It smells delicious. Tell your mother I said thank you as well.”

Theresa nodded back and finally came up beside her to set the tray within reach on the floor. Then she scuttled away quickly and Y/N tucked into the food. The oatmeal was slightly stale and plain with nothing to go in it, but it was warm and filling and the oranges were sweet and juicy despite their slightly tinny taste. It was the best meal she’d had in well over a week and she was grateful to Dean, the man who didn’t care about anyone, for providing it for her.

She hoped Emma was eating well this morning too, and that she was somehow coping with everything. She closed her eyes and tried to send her daughter strength.

The next few days passed much in the same way. Dean would watch her every night, assuring her that he was watching for any signs she was turning. But a couple days in, she woke up in the night to see his head slumped onto his chest, exhaustion finally winning out over any remaining fears he had of her changing.

On her fifth morning, Dean was locking her back up to the table after a visit to the latrines (during which he now allowed her to take the chain in with her and shut the door), when he swore and grabbed onto her right hand. He pushed the manacle up further on her arm and examined her wrist where it had been rubbed raw on the underside.

“What the fuck? Why didn’t you tell me you were hurt?”

Y/N shrugged. “Didn’t hurt that much, and I figured you wouldn’t care, you know, if you were still figuring on shooting me.” She said with a teasing smile.

Dean gave her his usual dirty look. “Yeah well, I wouldn’t want you to die of sepsis before I get the chance.”

He called to Patrick whose turn it was to guard the cabin for that morning. When the red-headed man stepped inside, Dean told him to bring a first aid kit from the medical tent. When Patrick left, Dean pulled another key from inside his jacket and unlocked the manacle on Y/N’s right hand.

Her arm felt strange without the extra weight of the manacle and chain. Dean checked her other wrist, satisfied that she only had the one wound. When Patrick returned with the first aid kit, Dean began cleaning the raw spot on Y/N’s grubby skin. 

As he worked, Theresa came in with Y/N’s breakfast. She pulled up short when she saw Dean there, since he was usually gone by the time she came in. Y/N tried to encourage her forward. 

“Thank you, Theresa. Don’t worry, your boss is just fixing up a scratch on my wrist. You can still bring breakfast over.”

The girl hesitated before moving over to Y/N and setting the tray on the floor. “Have you seen Emma today?” Y/N asked. 

Most of the time, she tried desperately not to think about what her daughter was going through. If she were to dwell on it too long it would drive her mad. As it was, the nightmare of watching Emma float away from her, was coming two or three times a night now.

The girl looked afraid to answer with Dean there and kept glancing over at him, clearly nervous. “It’s okay.” Y/N reassured her again. “Please, how is she?” Y/N asked, aware that desperation laced her voice.

Theresa looked up at Y/N, her big brown eyes far too wise for a thirteen year old girl.

“Sad.” She said simply before standing and scurrying out of the room.

Y/N felt like a knife was twisting in her gut. She closed her eyes and tried to stop her tears from falling, but simply couldn’t. Two fat tears fell down her cheeks as she stared into her lap. Without saying anything, Dean tied a bandage around her injured wrist before tying more gauze around her uninjured left wrist, protecting it from the rough metal.

He cleaned up the first aid kit and left without a word. It was a few minutes before Y/N realized he hadn’t re-manacled her right wrist.

All that day it felt as though a heavy stone sat in her stomach. She barely touched her breakfast (an egg and some sliced fried potatoes) and didn’t have a bite of lunch. She felt terrible wasting the food and insisted Patrick eat it. It tasted like ash to her and she simply couldn’t swallow. All she could think about was Emma and how she was hurting.

Her ability to compartmentalize her pain and fear was breaking down as worry and heartbreak took over everything. 

That evening, Dean showed up earlier than usual. He walked right up to her and, kneeling beside her, unlocked her other manacle so that she was free of the chains at last. She gave him a quizzical look.

“What are you doing?”

Dean shrugged. “It’s been nearly a week that you’ve been here and almost two weeks since you got bit.” His usual scowl was highlighted by confusion in his green gaze. “I don’t know what the hell is going on here, but it seems increasingly unlikely that you’re gonna start foaming at the mouth any time soon, so…”

He stood up and moved away, nodding to someone outside. Risa stepped through the door and behind her, holding her hand, was Emma.

Y/N gave out a loud cry of surprise, too many emotions flooding her at once to articulate any actual words. She tried to leap to her feet, but ended up stumbling back to her knees as Emma launched herself at her.

“Mommy!” Emma’s tears and sobs soon choked anymore words out of her as well. 

Y/N wrapped her daughter up tightly in her arms. “Oh, baby, baby!” She buried her face in her daughter's long hair, squeezing her too hard, she knew, but she couldn’t help it. She’d been so terrified she’d never get a chance to hold her again, so she savored the moment briefly before turning her head to where Dean was standing by the door.

Her throat was choked, but she pushed the words out. “Thank you. Thank you.” It was all she could say.

Dean didn’t respond and just walked out the door.

Jensen RPF and Any/All Characters: @lyarr24 @lacilou @deans-spinster-witch @globetrotter28 @suckitands33 @akshi8278 @evznackles @jackles010378 @impala67rollingthroughtown @krazykelly @candy-coated-misery0731 @envyaurora95 @spnwoman @deans-baby-momma

Dean Fics Only: @roonthelittlespoon920 @slamminmine @zepskies @deangirl96

Any/All Fics Regardless of Character or Fandom: @kazsrm67 @slut-for-evans-stan @sexyvixen7 @nancymcl @waywardcheshire

Everything Incl. Fan Edits: @k-slla @leigh70 @eevvvaa @kickingitwithkirk @foxyjwls007 @notinthislife50 @roseblue373 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @avanatural @mrsjenniferwinchester @all-alone-he-turns-to-stone

#dean winchester #endverse!dean #endverse!dean x reader #dean x reader #dean winchester fan fic #dean winchester fan fic series #spn fan fic #endverse

[hologramcowboy]

https://www.tumblr.com/hologramcowboy/745395618485272576/am-i-being-extra-sensitive-or-was-this-a-rape?source=share

I hope I can vent here for a second. I genuinely do not understand why anyone gave him a pass on that one. Had that been someone like Joe Jonas, Ben Affleck, Henry Cavill, Mike Tyson, Pedro Pascal even, they would not have been given a pass and it would have been all over main news media sites. He wouldn't be making that joke if he knew any of the children that were sexually abused by priests for decades or what happened with the Boy Scouts. There are just some things you don't make a joke about. His Brendan Fraser The Whale joke he made was bad enough, as were some other jokes he made over the years, but in this day and age, there is no more excuse. I don't personally know anyone affected by the abuse people of those two institutions enacted, that I'm aware of I should say, and I would never ever make that joke. As gross as Misha can be, even he didn't make that joke. Even if he wanted to play along, he shouldn't, not after he was so vocal about the mass graves found in Canada and the atrocities committed by the churches up there against Native children for decades.

Any AA that defends that joke Jensen made is a heartless asshole that needs to get their heads checked as soon as possible.

Now, that all being said, I think he's saying worse and worse things lately for two reasons. The first is I think this is really him and he just doesn't give a fuck anymore. Like he'll still try to tell people what he thinks they want to hear but more and more lately, he gives a very no fucks given vibe. Whether that's due to what happened with The Winchesters or Rust or whatever, that's the vibe he gives off. The second is I think he says assholish shit like this at certain points because he's trying to give off a Soldier Boy vibe, sort of selling that character since a lot of people speculate he'll be returning for The Boys' last season. Sort of like he used to dress as Dean with the flannel and jeans, and then like Beau when Big Sky was airing. I could be wrong but that's the vibe I got when he went "oh, that's too far?"

I'm curious as to what your thoughts are. Not about the joke, we all know it was disgusting and highly inappropriate, but about why he presents himself like this sometimes. And why he always seems to get a free pass the more he ups the ante on being an asshole.

Jensen's self image is warped by his sychopant fans and his deluded wife. He has no personality of his own and instead tries to inject in himself the attributes of the characters he gets cast as because he mistakes characters for branding. Branding is who You are not who your character is. Branding is that unique essence you bring to your character.

Sorry to say but this is what happens when a man who lacks culture and studies gets hyper praised to the point where he loses his sensitivity towards others. Jensen has a one sided view in life, anyone who disagrees with him is automatically a bully. He is just like his sychopantic fans. He can't perceive the world in all of its layers and that's endlessly sad for someone who claims to be an artist.

He claims he wants to bring light to the world or whatever will earn him approval but then acts like a jock who is bullying his friends.

At the end of the day, Jensen is a subpar actor who lacks culture in an industry where people are now multihyhyphenated and multicultured. It would do him good to be more grounded and realize that his influence can help people when it is used with the intention to help, rather than when it is squandered on incredibly inappropriate jokes and behaviors (getting superdrunk at cons is a superbad example).

Being praised in a one sided way has clearly gone to his head. That terrible joke is not the first time he demonstrated a lack of empathy and self awareness. I really wish he had good role models around him but he's married to the queen of bullying so why are we even surprised when he acts like a mindless, self centered jock?

Jensen needs to grow up. A lot. Thank you for allowing me to vent, I have tears in my eyes as I am writing this, I am just so sad he's turning out to be such a disappointment on so many levels. You see, you are definitely not alone in your need to vent and thank you so much for expressing things in an honest, open way. AAs forget what honesty and having values means because they forego their own values and replace them with the perceived ones from Jensen. It pains me to say this because I saw so much in him but...Jensen is no rolemodel.

#jensen critical

[lets-steal-an-archive]

TV Guide: Can you briefly talk about Dean's new look? When he showed up in that turtleneck with that swoopy hair, I was like, "Who is this man?"

Thompson: Yeah, a big credit to Carrie, who runs our costumes and was on the mothership as well. She and her team create these incredible lookbooks, and Jensen had felt like Dean would try to fit in a little bit in the era, and because we were in a bus depot and we knew we were going to have other people there in military uniforms, I think someone had mentioned a merchant marine kind of a look. As soon as I saw it, because she uses stills from movies and I think it was a still of Robert Redford from the 70s, and I was like, "Oh my god, I can't wait to see that." That was the first thing we shot of him on the last episode, and again, I think a lot of people happened to have shown up that day for work that didn't need to do that just to see a very handsome Dean Winchester in a turtleneck and peacoat. He looked phenomenal.

it's been way too long since Robbie brought out Costumes

#the winchesters #robbie thompson #jensen ackles #spnwin s1 spoilers #spnwin spoilers #spnwin 1x13 #7x12 #8x11 #8x20 #and then the mark of cain happened

[lol-jackles]

Is it just a side effect of being somewhat disappointed in who Jensen presents himself in recent years, or is it normal that I find Dean's sad monologues less meaningful and more over dramatic the more times I watch supernatural?

For me, many of the earlier ones hold up well, but him talking to his dad’s grave in What is and What Should Never Be just feels a bit silly now. Like, that’s not even your real dad’s s grave, dude. And the mirror scene in Regarding Dean feels a bit self-indulgent. Even him talking to Mary inside her head just seems like … too much? It’s like I can feel the show going, “Get ready for it … we’ve got a scene coming up where Dean is going to emote all over you! Cue up the one perfect man tear!" Or the whole over the top apology to Castiel in purgatory.

It could just be the natural effect of rewatching, but I often find the emotional monologues less impactful. Yet, I still enjoy watching Jared play soulless Sam, and looking at how different he is from normal Sam. Or seeing how he deteriorated during the trials era.

I guess I’m just wondering if I’m just biased now. Or if there is a more legitimate reason that Jensen’s emotional scenes loose effect on me while Jared’s characterization still fascinated me.

There’s a reason why I didn’t choose the scenes you mentioned for my "Jensen’s best acting" posts.

I suspect the main issue was the lack of organic build up so it felt slightly out of the left field. Look at the ~build up to Dean's emotional conversation to Mary in 12x22:

12x3 - Dean refuse to look at Mary when she tries to day good-bye

12x4 - Dean wonders why Mary isn't calling or texting him

12x6 - Dean wouldn't talk to Mary

12x7 - Dean is angry that Mary isn't calling or texting him

12x12 - Can't remember if Dean and Mary interacted while Sam was killing Ramiel.  

12x13 - Dean bans Mary from the bunker

12x15 - 12x20: Dean is mad that Mary isn't calling or texting him

The saving grace of Dean's speech in 12x22 was it was about how Mary's demon deal had destroyed Sam's life and her death destroyed the family. This speech was a long time coming and it need to happen, but the build up to it should have been better executed.

Dean's apology-prayer in 15x09 also didn't have an organic build up, which was why Jensen comes off as overacting.  They didn't spend any time showing why Benny was such a big deal, he wasn't even in the “Then” portion of the intro, so the general audience had no clue who this Benny is because he was last seen 7 seasons ago. Then this was supposed to be the build up to Dean's apology-prayer: 

Dean: I know you’re sorry about mom

Cas: I’m so over your dead mother. I was talking about Jack

Dean: *shocked pikachu face*

In contrast to 4x11 when Dean revealed to Sam about his time in hell and broke down into an emotional confession how after 30 years on the rack, he broke and took up torturing souls and he liked that.  That breakdown makes sense because the preceding episodes were building up to Dean’s breakdown and he earned the right to do so. 

#jensen ackes

[meatmandean]

jensen ackles' roles rated by their daddy issues (part 2)

jason teague (smallville)- 7/10 his dad cut him off and he did not have a good relationship with him at all. he only got a 7 though because he had MUCH bigger mommy issues.

jake gray (devour)- 10/10 he had a tense relationship with his adoptive father who was played by jensen's real life father. the layers there alone would give him a high score but then we also find out that jake's girlfriend is actually his biological mother who is actually satan. i don't know if that would make satan his mother or his father but nevertheless i think that gives him a perfect score.

boaz priestly (ten inch hero)- 8/10 if i remember correctly, he directly says something negative about his father at some point in the movie. but even if he doesn't, it shouldn't matter. the man has a dyed mohawk, multiple piercings, and regularly wears eyeliner. he hates his father for sure.

tom hanniger (my bloody valentine)- 7.5/10 he was estranged from his father but i'll be honest tom had some much bigger issues going on than just the daddy variety. that definitely took a back seat here.

jason todd (batman: under the red hood)- 9.5/10 his adoptive father is batman and he grows up to be a murderer and a crime boss out of resentment. you do the math. .5 deducted cuz i didn't get to physically see jensen cry about this.

dean winchester (supernatural)- 20/10 literally no character has ever been more defined by their daddy issues than dean winchester. literally everything he does can be traced back to his relationship with his father. he is the blueprint for characters with daddy issues.

bruce wayne (batman: the long halloween)- 4/10 i feel like batman SHOULD have more daddy issues but really he's just sad his parents are dead. which could count, i suppose. he had alfred as a positive father figure, though, so i think his bigger issues are everything else about him.

beau arlen (big sky)- 5/10 barely know this man yet but i'm giving him a preemptive half score because it's a safe bet this old fashioned texas cop man will have a few issues with his father.

soldier boy (the boys)- 10/10 jensen and kripke combine forces again to not only make this character HAVE daddy issues but we also actively got to watch him GIVE homelander brand new daddy issues for the first time! great work guys, thank you so much.

(part one)

#jensen ackles #hof*

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

Hey, Michelle! I'm a night owl, which is why I'm still up at 1 a.m. 🦉

I have a question for you, and it may be a tough one considering how many awesome stories you've written, but...

Which story are you most proud of? If it's easier, one series, one one-shot. 😆💕

I'm a night owl too! Which is why it's so unfortunate I have to start my workday at 7am 😂

Stories I'm most proud of, hm? Well that is definitely not the easiest question, especially considering the volume of them! So I'm going to cheat juuuuust a little bit and keep the list to under 10 (you may want coffee, wine and/or snacks cause this turned into a novel):

The Daughter!Reader Fic With More Timestamps Than Parts (😂)

Probably the one series I'm most proud of because of the impact it's had on my readers is A Place to Call Home (or APTCH as it's been affectionately dubbed around here). And it's a funny little story to me to have that special designation because it really shouldn't be so popular. It's a Jensen x foster daughter!reader story which is so niche in the first place. I don't really read daughter!reader stories myself so I really have no idea why I wanted to write this one. I held onto it for almost a year after it was written because I thought I'd get such a negative reaction to it for being weird, disrespectful, you name it. Yet, it's turned into this never-ending saga that I get told over and over is one thing: comforting. It's such a simple story, a girl who needs a family but has been so hurt she's given up on the idea of one and a man who will do whatever it takes to show her she's worthy of love. And it's that story over time from a scared 17 year old high school kid to a young woman falling in love, figuring out her own career, navigating her own family, her own adulthood and how overtime that relationship with Jensen grows and changes as it does for all of us with parents as we grow up. Having people who were actually in foster care/were adopted/are foster/adoptive parents themselves reach out and say it captures a lot of those real life feelings and desires is still probably the best compliment I've ever gotten. For every situation there is, good or bad, I've been told it's a pick me up by so many and for that I will always be proud of this one.

The Canon-esque, "Hey this is like a post-show movie"

Staying in canon is fun. Staying in canon at a point beyond the show? That's even more fun for me. Beautiful Loser was really my first crack at, "hey what could a post series finale pickup look like?" Bring in some kids, bring in good ole fashioned hunter paranoia, bring in a creepy little kid...this one felt like writing an episode of SPN and I'm SOOO happy with how it turned out! The lore, the ups and downs, damn it still gets me.

The Arranged Marriage Political Thriller

I mean, Unconventional originally was supposed to be a fun little ABO quirky arranged marriage story and then...then it became "this idea of being lesser is the shit women have to deal with even in the real world". I didn't intend to write that story but it ended up going there and I'm incredibly proud of the message it puts out there that change is hard, change requires sacrifice sometimes, but not everyone is bad and if you fight for it, sometimes you can make a real difference.

The Fast Paced Detective Story

39 Hours was the first story I ever wrote based on the aesthetic and one of the first cop!Dean stories I did. I wrote it like a good thriller mystery. The clock is ticking down faster and faster. The protector is a grump with maybe a soft side? The victim isn't weak and some threat is looming in the air. This was such a departure for me to write a long condensed story like this too but it broke open that avenue for me and I still consider this one of my favorite stories I've done.

The Body Issues One

It's such a trope of women having body issues but what about if the guy had them too? Because we know they do they do, they just talk about it so much. And we all always call Jensen that male model SOB so a model Dean was faaar too tempting. Now give the reader some physical scars from an accident Dean's own dad caused, a father who's disowned Dean for his career choice...we've got two people who very much seem themselves as broken yet can't see it in one another. This was a heavy topic on a lot of fronts to work in Broken Like Me but I'm really happy with the messaging that comes through.

The Jensen Shower Pics Inspired One

Thank god for Jensen Ackles cause this one wouldn't have existed without those shirtless late night pics. ABO has always been an interesting world I like to push the boundaries of but this was my first real attempt at going big, adding my own rules and boundaries. Coming up with the new science, adding the mystery elements, adding that growing sexual tension...yeah Feral is my favorite ABO story I've ever done hands down.

The Best RPF I'll Ever Write

RPF isn't for everyone but if you only ever read one by me, it's got to be If I Fell For You by a landslide. A Jensen x nanny!reader fic can be, let's just say, really easy to screw up. They can go down routes I don't like to go. But this story deals with so many themes that are worthwhile. Grief. Loss. Learning to love again. Parental love and when it's lacking. Forgiveness and pain. It hurts so good is the best way to put this one. And the safety net analogy I came up with in Part 4 is something I'm particularly proud of.

Making You Forgive The Asshole

I know you in particular will understand this Zep but writing a redemption story for Soldier Boy is fucking hard. It's really easy to watch the show and go he's awful but he's so cute, he can do whatever he wants. Throw in an actual reader and suddenly him being walking sin ain't gonna cut it. Writing character growth realistically can be hard. It can be ever harder when we got like a grand total of 15 mins of screen time with that character. I was nervous as hell to write Thunder In Our Hearts quite honestly. So when I got the reaction that I didn't screw it up felt so, so good. Now I can't wait to do it again with The Villain's Protector! 😉

I'm quite proud of myself for narrowing this down to 8 fics lol. There are many more I could list but these are the big hitters! And thank you for the trip down memory lane! 🥰

#fic rec #spn #supernatural #the boys

[eisforeidolon]

Jensen: How you doin'?

Jared: I'm doing well, man. I can't believe it's -

Audience member: Did you poop?

Jared: December of '23.

Jensen: [to audience member] What did you just say?

Audience member: Rich said he was pooping. So I said -

Jensen: Okay, alright, it's gonna be one of those shows. She's like, "Didja poop?"

Jared: Recently? I have in my life, yes. Have y'all? No? Oh, bull-

Jensen: Alright, okay.

Jared: Here's a question, here's an honest, like, weird trivia question. You know why they say that's bullshit, meaning that's not worth anything? It's because bull manure has no nutritive value. So you can use cow manure -

Jensen: [stares, drops his mic to his leg with a thwack]

Jared: C'mon! It's not a dad joke, it's a legit thing! So bull shit is useless. So when they're like, oh, that's bullshit, saying - It's been fun, guys! [acts like he's leaving]

Jensen: And that's Jared's last panel at Creation. Fun facts by Jared Padalecki.

Audience member: Love you, Jared!

Jared: I love you, too, thank you. Suck it, Ackles. She loves me.

Jensen: Well, that's - you've got one.

Jared: And that's not bullshit.

[More audience yelling affection for both]

Jensen: Okay, alright, that's worth - good.

Jared: [fake annoyed] What fun factoid did Jensen give you? None!

Audience member: I love your eyes!

Jensen: What?

Jared: [laughing] I love his eyes. [fans self] I'm right next to him.

Jensen: This is going off the rails and we haven't even started yet.

Jared: Let's get this train back on the tracks. Not gonna waste y'all's time, let's start over here. Howdy!

[...]

Question: If Sam and Dean had to go into the djinn - like got hit by the djinn again, what do you think their djinn dreams would be now?

Jared: Geez. Starting off hot!

Question: This question's been brewing for a couple months, so.

Jared: That's amazing!

Jensen: If - what - in - like after, at this point in the?

Jared: I think probably the same. I think, I think so? [turns to Jensen]

Jensen: Yeah, I think that's probably the go-to thing, is for both, they always dreamed of this kind of slice of normalcy. Even though they know that that's not something that would have ever worked for them? I think they still hold that in their, kind of, idea of what they missed.

Jared: Yeah, I always thought also, recently, I feel like Dean, funny enough? Would have dreams about abandoned barns that didn't have rebar sticking through [makes violent poking motion with finger] - too soon? Do you know that bullshit has no nutritive value, to be used as manure? But that's my thought.

Jensen: Neither does this answer, [Jared laughs] so it's -

Jared: [to questioner] What do you think?

Question: I don't know, I think it could be the same. I think maybe, at least from my interpretation, I think it would maybe be different after they met their mom, because I always thought that Dean saw her in such high regard and then when he actually met her, it's not that it lowered, but it kinda gave him more realistic expectations of her meeting him.

Jensen: Yeah, I think that may have shed some light into what that relationship, what the history was behind that? But I still think Dean would have this, this wishful idea of what life could have been. [Jared nods] Even though he knew, or knows more, I think he still maybe held that as a bit of a dream. Even though he knows it would never really be like that, but still.

#j2 main panel #nashcon 2023 #long post

[lucidlivi]

Chosen For Pleasure (XI)

Series Masterlist/Warnings

Tag List: @ladysparkles78 @suckitands33 @little-x-wolf @stoneyggirl2 @creative-writing92 @jc-winchester @mrsjenniferwinchester @lessons-of-red @jamerlynn @deans-spinster-witch @kazsrm67 @deans-baby-momma @willow-sages @ritz-hell-hotel @perpetualabsurdity @mhessellund @itzabbyxx @chriszgirl92 @abbybarnesstuff @larrem88 @commonsenseishard @impalaspixie @notsogoofyjelly @hzllxhoundxx @taylortots-world @k-slla @heavenlyackles @spnfamily-j2 @buckybarnes-1917 @foxyjwls007 @spnbaby-67 @readingsins (if you would like to be added to my list, please send me a message or an ask!)

Fluffy Angsty Chapter! Also this skips around some, just bear with me... trying to get you guys to the juicy stuff! It all makes sense, just have to use your imagination to fill in some gaps!

"and his pass is canceled for the convention this weekend right?" Jensen spoke over the phone.

I was curled up on his sofa wrapped in a robe. At this point the tears have stopped, but the feeling of disgust was still present. I couldn't believe that happened. I was starting to wonder if I was giving him the wrong impression. Jensen assured me many times that it wasn't my fault.

I heard him grumble a few more words before he hung up. Jensen came over to the sofa, picking me up and cuddling me into his lap.

"It's over, he's done at the company, you won't have to see him again." Jensen said running a hand through my hair.

"he's really gone?"

"he's gone."

I took a deep breath and cuddled in to him closer.

"It's not your fault, you know that right?"

"did I give him the wrong impression?" I asked sitting up so I could look at him.

"no, absolutely not, it was him, you did nothing wrong, you hear me nothing." Jensen said cupping a hand to my cheek.

I realized Jensen was right. I told him no. I never gave any indication that I was in to him. It was him. It wasn't me. I just needed to accept that.

"thanks for lending me your robe, I couldn't stand to be in those clothes another minute." I said as I cuddled the material closer to me.

Jensen was a big guy, so this thing swallowed me whole, but it was undeniably comfortable. It was silent for a few moments before Jensen broke the tension.

"you know uh, if you wanted, you could move some of your stuff in here.......or like all of your stuff." Jensen said rubbing his hand along his neck nervously.

I choked on my breath at his offer.

"are you uh asking me to move in with you?"

"I guess I am....I just I was worried about you today, I couldn't protect you and that scared me. I want to protect you, I want you around." He rambled.

I felt my heart swell. I didn't think I could fall harder for this man than I am right now.

"can I think about it?"

"of course."

****************************************************

"didn't you guys hear Gray resigned unexpectedly last night?" A female coworker gossips to Stella and myself.

Of course we knew the truth.

If I thought Stella was mad about Jensen, she was furious about Gray.

I sighed walking in to his office, memories of yesterday replaying in my head. I wasn't sure if I was still going to have a job after all of this. Gray appointed me senior editor, but now I'm realizing that was just part of his sick ploy. If they knew the real reason he left, I was definitely a conflict of interest.

The head of HR Bonnie was frantically looking around his desk. She glanced up at me before quickly glancing back down.

"oh good, just the person I wanted to see." Bonnie said rummaging through papers on his desk.

Here it comes. I'm fired. I knew it.

"Gray resigned last night, no word why, he's got a meeting today with the owner of the magazine and you're probably the only one who knows his stuff." Bonnie said in a rush.

I felt a sigh of relief. They didn't know.

"so I'm not fired?" I blurted out, before I could stop myself.

"why would you be fired?" Bonnie asked stopping her searching to gaze at me.

"It's just uh, Gray appointed me this position so I didn't know if.." I started my lie, but I couldn't think of how to finish.

I was thankful that Bonnie was too distracted to break down what I was actually saying.

"quite the opposite actually, I need you to temporarily fill in for Gray at today's meeting." Bonnie said handing me a stack of papers.

I realized it was the draft for this months magazine.

"wait you want me to fill in?" I asked shocked.

"you're right that's too much and..."

"no I'll do it." I said quickly.

Gray stole a part of me, now I was taking it back.

I breathed a shaky sigh as I walked in to the conference room. All of the executives were there making small talk. I gave a small smile, informing them I'd be filling in for Gray today. I listened to the men talk over each other as they were discussing the essential items to put in this months magazine. I was a little timid, being the only woman in the room.

"maybe we need to be featuring some new voices." I spoke barely above a whisper.

Suddenly all eyes were on me.

"I mean people are going to get tired of the same stale material, but we have plenty of reporters who write amazing articles if we took the time to sift through them I think we could reach more people." I explained, suddenly finding my voice.

"that's ridiculous." one of the men said rolling his eyes.

"no, that's smart, I love it." David, the CEO of our company said.

I could feel eyes on me as the meeting wrapped up. I went to grab the papers when David stood in front of me.

"what did you say your job was again?" He asked.

"oh uh I was just filling in for Gray, I'm just a photographer, and I edited the photographs."

"hm, well how about you permanently fill in for Gray?" David said smiling.

"wait you want me to be the chief editor?" I asked, not believing what was happening to me.

"I do, and your first job is to find me some new voices." David said giving me a nod.

****************************************************

"to the new chief editor." Jensen said raising his wine glass.

"you didn't have anything to do with this did you?" I asked giving him a look.

"no sweetheart that was all you."

"sorry, it's just I don't really believe it myself." I laughed clanking my wine glass against his.

"well believe it, that was all pure talent from you."

"it's just that people are talking." I sighed.

"who cares, let them talk, because you earned it." Jensen smiled.

our waiter brought the check over to our table. I quickly grabbed it so he couldn't pay the bill.

"gotta be quicker than that Ackles." I laughed handing it to the waiter.

He shook his head before grabbing my hand and bringing it up to his lips to place a tender kiss on it. I felt the butterflies erupting in my stomach. I gazed at him lovingly, but suddenly something caught my eye.

It was her.

The girl.

"what is it?" Jensen asked, noticing my change in demeanor.

I took my eyes off the girl to glance at Jensen, however when I glanced back she was gone again. I felt like I was going crazy. I swear I saw her a second ago.

"uh, a couple days ago, there was this girl outside my work, she knew my name, but it seemed like she knew more than that." I said feeling a chill run down my spine.

"you know we should go get you a dress before all the shops close." Jensen said, avoiding the conversation.

"you know something don't you?"

"I don't know anything, probably just some crazy fan girl who saw you with me and is trying to get close to me." He shrugged it off, grabbing my hand and pulling me out the door.

"okay two things, one that was very pretentious of you, and two I thought we said no more secrets."

"It's not a secret."

"and you're a terrible liar." I glared.

He took a deep breath knowing he'd been caught.

"Riley..., we fooled around a couple years ago." Jensen started to explain.

He was hesitant to continue but I urged him on.

"what happened with her?"

"what alway happened, she wanted more, I didn't. I broke it off, and she was devastated....I mean she eventually ended up getting married, but her husband left her, and now she's convinced we were meant to be together." He said taking a deep breath before continuing.

"In uh California, the day on the boat when I took the call, she uh showed up to one of my ale houses and slit her wrists trying to get my attention, it nearly gave my patrons a heart attack, my guys have been looking for her ever since, the girl needs help she's unstable." Jensen explained.

"oh my god Jensen, you didn't think this would be something worth mentioning to me!?"

"I didn't want you to worry about it."

"I thought we weren't going to keep secrets anymore, this seems like a pretty major thing to be keeping from me!"

"I thought I was protecting you." He said putting a hand to my cheek but I moved back a step letting it fall.

"well you see how that worked out cause she's clearly found me." I said feeling a little frightened.

If she was that unstable, who knew what she was capable of.

"I won't let you get hurt." Jensen said pulling me in to a hug.

I let him, wanting his comfort.

"I'm not going to let her hurt you." Jensen said kissing my temple.

****************************************************

I looked in the mirror one last time, soothing out the silk midnight blue evening gown.

It really was beautiful.

I tried on many different ones before settling on this one. It was simple, but elegant, kind of how I would describe myself. I didn't need some thousand dollar dress, of course Jensen didn't let me pay anyways.

As the cashier was ringing me up, Jensen swiped his credit card before I could even get mine out.

"gotta be quicker than that (L/N)." He smirked mocking me from earlier.

I smiled at the memory.

It was the night of the ball and I was a bundle of nerves. It's been a whirlwind of a week, from being promoted to the new chief editor, to finding out there's a crazy girl out to get me.

"wow." I heard a voice call from the doorway.

I turned around to see Jensen standing clad in a royal blue suit. He looked breathtaking, the blue bringing out the color of his eyes.

"wow yourself." I smiled.

"you look beautiful." Jensen said.

I smiled, turning back towards the mirror. Jensen came up behind me, kissing my neck.

"so. fucking. beautiful." he whispered between kisses.

I choked back a moan, cocking my head to the side so he'd have better access.

"mm as much as I want to rip this dress off of you, I believe we have a ball to attend." Jensen smiled.

I let him lead me outside, but was shocked to find Cole standing in front of a limo.

"Jensen this is too much." I said laughing while offering Cole a smile.

"only the best for my lady." Jensen smirked.

Jensen and I sipped on champagne as we traveled.

Sometimes I felt like I was truly living in a dream, like one day I would wake up and find out that I had some serious head trauma from my fall and that none of this was actually real.

I didn't realize how quiet I was being until Jensen spoke up.

"what's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" Jensen asked, tucking a piece of stray hair behind my ears.

"just that all of this feels like a dream, you feel like a dream."

Jensen smiled, scooting a little closer to me. He placed a hand on my cheek, stroking my cheekbone with his thumb.

"It's not a dream, I'm real baby, this is real."

I stared at the handsome man before me, and before I could stop it, the words fell from my lips.

"Jensen I love you."

I could see that he was taken back for a second.

"I don't expect you to say it back, not until you feel comfortable, I just wanted to let you know." I quickly explained.

although I was dying for him to say it back, I wouldn't say so.

"(y/n) I..."

"HERE" Cole shouted as the limo slowed down.

Of course.

Jensen smiled at me, as Cole opened the door offering me his hand. I grabbed it letting him help me out of the limo. Jensen got out after me, offering me his arm.

"your masks Mr. Ackles." Cole said opening a brief case revealing two masquerade type masks.

I gave him a look, the smile already finding it's way to my face.

"oh didn't I mention this was a masquerade ball?" Jensen smirked putting on his mask before helping me tie mine.

"no that never came up." I laughed.

Jensen finished tying the mask, once again offering me his arm. I linked his arm with mine, letting him lead me through the crowd of people. I noticed a couple guys in all black suits following us.

"I'm guessing these guys belong to you?" I asked.

"just extra security.. I told you, I'm not going to let you get hurt." He assured.

"you won't even know they're here." He added.

Somehow I doubted that, but I didn't want to ruin our night. I saw eyes glance our way as we made our way through the masked individuals.

"everyone is looking at us." I told Jensen suddenly feeling a little insecure.

"not us, you... you're the prettiest girl here tonight." Jensen flirted.

I rolled my eyes playfully slapping his shoulder.

It was elegant in here, everyone was dressed up, donning masks so we couldn't tell who was who. It was a magical moment, something I could only dream about growing up. A body stopped in front of us, and by the sheer size of it I could tell right away that it was Jared.

"I'm so sorry man, I didn't know she would be here." Jared quickly rushes out.

He turns around gazing in the direction of a blonde girl in a formfitting red dress. Even with a mask on I could tell she was beautiful. I glance at Jensen and notice that his entire demeanor has changed. He was no longer smiling, instead he looked like a lost, sad soul. I felt a burning in my chest as I asked the question that was weighing heavily on my mind.

"is that..."

"Elle."

Author Note:

I'm so sorry ya'll, I really be the annoying ass cliffhanger author. I have to keep you coming back for more though! I'm also sorry it's a shorter update, but we're really getting in to the thick of it now! I really hope you're enjoying, thanks so much for all the love already, please keep continuing to heart, comment, reblog, and follow, it makes us authors want to continue! I love you all!

xoxo

Liv

Part (XII)

#jensen ackles #jensen ackles imagine #jensen ackles x female!reader #jensen ackles x reader #jensen ackles x you #dean winchester #jensen x reader #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester x reader #jensen ackles fanfiction #jensen ackles preference #jensen x you #jensen and jared #jensen ackles series #jensen ackles smut #supernatural smut #supernatural #spn fanfic #spn #spn cast

[capnko]

This question has been on my mind a while now.

Would you have liked your favourite actor's performances as much if you hadn't fallen in love with your favourite character?

(Note that English isn't my native language - please tell me if I didn't formulate the question right!)

I, like most people, have favourite actors. They became my favourite actors by bringing my favourite characters to life.

Take Michael Sheen for example. I'll admit that I'd never heard of him until I watched good omens. I fell instantly fell in love with Aziraphale when I first read the book, and was ecstatic when I started the show. Michael Sheen did an incredible job, his performance made me love the angel even more than I did before, which I hadn't known was possible until it happened. The same thing counts for David Tennant's Crowley.

When I finished season 1, I watched every film and series with Michael and David as cast members that I could get my hands on. Takin' over the Asylum, Bright Young Things, The Good Fight, Mad to be Normal, Underworld, Bad Samaritan, Masters of Sex - the list goes on.

Here's the thing though.

Would I have enjoyed all these shows/films as much as I did, if I hadn't watched Good Omens first? If I had watched Prodigal Son before Good Omens, would I have gotten so excited when I saw Martin Whitly on screen? Or would he have been just another killer on a crime show?

Here are some other examples:

Would I have appreciated Mischa Collins' performance as Harvey Dent/TwoFace in Gotham Knights as much as I did if I hadn't fallen in love with Castiel in Supernatural? Would I have cared at all about Jensen Ackles' character Soldier Boy in The Boys if I hadn't cared for Dean Winchester? Would I have watched every comedy show, every film and series Rhys Darby acted in if I hadn't been obsessing over Our Flag Means Death, more specifically, Stede Bonnet?

Rhys Darby became my favourite comedian when I checked out his most recent special "Mystic Time Bird". It makes me uncomfortable to think about how I probably never would've laughed my ass off because of his jokes if I hadn't watched OFMD first.

Fucking hell, would I even find him as hilarious as I do if I wasn't absolutely gone for Stede?

I can't answer that question and it's really uncomfortable (at least for me) to think about.

There are all of these incredible characters that make so incredibly happy, all these actors that make me laugh, all these authors/writers who I'm so so grateful for.

And I'm not sure I would feel all these things if I hadn't stumbled upon them the way I had. If it hadn't happened in the order it had.

Does that make sense? I don't know if I'm just overthinking this or if I'm being overly emotional or something - I'm just, worried? I guess?

Idk man, thanks for listening (well, reading) to me rant ig. Have a nice day/evening/night!

#fandom #fandom questions #genuine question #fandom rant #good omens #our flag meets death #michael sheen #david tennant #crowley #aziraphale #stede bonnet #rhys darby

[dotthings]

"We had Wayward Sisters. I thought that should have really gotten a shot." -- Jensen Ackles at NYCC 2022

"I love this story...man do I want to help tell this story!!!" -- Jensen Ackles about Wayward Sisters, on twitter 5.13.2018

"This needs to exist." -- Jensen Ackles about Wayward Sisters (via Kim Rhodes, reported in hypable January 2018)

“Selfishly, I’m split. I’d love to see these girls go and tell this amazing story, and I’d love to help them do that. But at the same time, I want to keep those characters in our world. I don’t want to let them go; they’re amazing characters. They’re fan favorites and they’re cast favorites, so there’s a reason that they got that opportunity and I think it just goes to show how great they are and how valuable they are to us.” -- Jensen Ackles about Wayward Sisters (EW, 5.17.2018)

"I felt it was important because Dark Kaia’s promise to Dean in 14.09 was so loaded, and we never resolved it. (The plan was to do it in S14 but it didn’t happen.) That Jensen agreed it mattered gave me some steam to push for it." -- Robert Berens on twitter, 3.17.2020

---

A gentle reminder that Jensen liked WS and was disappointed in didn't get to series. He also recognized why it was needed, and you can see the impact of WS on The Winchesters. Centering female pov, inclusive casting, more room and space for characters to breathe and live and address their traumas, centering a group/found family...all earmarks of WS.

Also to correct some misinformation certain parties like to keep spreading: WS wasn't cancelled because of low ratings or because it was bad, and it wasn't because antis hated on WS. The support for WS was big. The reason it didn't get picked it was due to behind the scenes politics on the corporate level having to do with CBS and WB co-ownership of CW.

#Jensen Ackles #Wayward Sisters

[aborddelimpala]

"I don't know anyone who ships Wincest who are upset that people feel Dean represents their queerness. The distinction between canon and fanon is important because truth and accuracy matter. Saying Dean is *canonically* bi is not supported anywhere in the show. Canonically, Dean repeats that he doesn't swing that way, sleeps with a ton of women, uses the straight person app, and never even responds to Cas's declaration of love - or even mention it after it happens. The way he sits/speaks/stares is not canonical anything. Canonically, Supernatural is terrible rep. It deserves and should get no accolades for stuff it didn't do. It shouldn't go down in history as groundbreaking queer anything, because it broke no ground. Saying it did is rewriting history and misrepresenting the show. And that matters because we are still in an era where we are surrounded on all sides by people trying to rewrite history to be whatever they want it to be - politically, socially, in the media, everywhere. As a queer person, it's important to me personally to make the distinction between canon and fanon because if we insist that a man who never makes a queer move in canon is good rep, who says he's straight and only sleeps with women on screen, then that's what we'll get.

In fanon? I have no problems with Dean being bi, trans, gay, aromantic, secretly ace - however folks relate to him. Fanon lets you read between the lines all you want.

OFMD gave us canonical queer characters - characters who verbally or physical confirm their queerness. So did Black Sails, Interview with the Vampire, Sex Education, Euphoria, Supergirl, First Kill, Nimona, Owl House. Dean does not, despite repeat opportunities.

Saying that Dean's canonically bi feels like gaslighting. It doesn't matter how many times people say it - Dean was conceived of as straight according to Kripke, written as straight in dialogue and action in the scripts, and played as straight according to Jensen. On the other hand, canonically Cas is gay. He was conceived of as genderless originally, written with bi plots, and ultimately played and viewed as queer by S15 according to Misha. It is a legitimate queer journey, one many people have gone through. I would still argue that it deserved much more onscreen development and dialogue to be good rep - see OFMD and Black Sails, e.g. Queer Cas deserved better than he got, especially with turbohell seconds later. But that's the difference - queer Cas IS canon. Bi Dean is not.

And yeah, it's a fiction show, and 50 years from now not many people will care. But the truth should still matter. I've shipped Wincest, Megstiel, Destiel, Sastiel and a ton of others in-between. Megstiel at least got a kiss, which is more than Destiel got.

tl;dr I fully support everyone shipping all the ships, see yourself in any character you want, embrace all the queer fanon, write and art and vid and whatever. But Wincest isn't canon, and Dean - on the show, not in our heads - is not bi. And truth and actual rep both matter.

And time and time again, we've seen that the studios will give us the bare minimum. If we say a character conceived, written and acted as straight is good queer rep, they have no reason to give us characters conceived, written and acted as queer. And THAT'S what I care about."

This is the most mature and well written discourse I've read about Dean sexuality. I'm glad Casey allowed me to share it here.

#supernatural #fandom discourse #dean's sexuality

[hologramcowboy]

Jensen, i love you, but the fact that you lack the professional integrity, expertise and response-ability to admit that the product you created as subpar and are now trying to dupe people into saving an unworthy project makes me truly worried.

It seems I was wrong about you and you truly are vapid, clueless and egocentric. We all know the ONLY reason you created TW was to have it center on making Dean return out of egocentrism. We know this because even the leads that were cast were not leading man and lady type because you clearly wanted nothing and no one overshadowing Dean. You provided your actors with exactly zero onset coaches and that says everything. The entire script (deeply shitty script) was a means to an end. To make matters worse, you direspected the SPN legacy on every level including by playing Dean the wrong way (do you even remember what Dean is about? Have you even ever done script analysis? Do you know what character analysis is and why actors use it? Did you even stop to get at least one private coaching session before playing him again?) which showed us that, in the end, it wasn't even about Dean, he, like TW, was a means to an end. You wanted to get back in the spotlight but had zero respect for your audience and for serving people.

The audience loves quality, dynamic scripts and experiencing catharsis so they rejected your egotrip and your "show"(emphasis on the "your") got cancelled.

Yet, you still fail to acknowledge or take responsibility for any of it and are trying to push and extremely shitty show to other networks and that show me you lack professional integrity and are only in it exclusively for the money. Truly heartbreaking.

I am certain you don't even care about the actors on TW, a producer that cares and hires inexperienced actors will also simultaneously hire an acting coach, dialogue coach and so on. The ONLY reason you are now pushing to have it renewed is to be able to say "I tried. It didn't work out, guys." and then wash your hands as if its lack of success doesn't even matter, you played no part in it and anyone that dislikes the show is clearly a "bully". Sorry Jensen but you seem more and more like a narcissist to me, I always loved to keep up hope that you were different than Danneel, in some aspects, at least. I was wrong.

I wish you great success in your career but in a way that is ethical, in a way that involves integrity, growth, taking responsibility and putting in high quality work so that you may inspire many.

Disclaimer for those reading: Goes without saying but this is just my opinion/perception, please discard it if it does not match yours.

#jensen critical #anti the winchesters