#that ive been followed around by the same benign ghosty spirit since my first apartment

[deadmomjokes]

Me: *only marginally believes in ghosts and hauntings*

Also me, when the baby monitor starts static crackling for no reason: "Begone, Spirit, go hop in the fridge or something, it's been a hot minute since you made the gurgley sounds and we're trying to sleep here." *crackling stops* "Cool thanks, Spirit, happy kitchen cabinet rattling or whatever just keep out of the bedrooms k night night 😘"

#the blub blub monster #keep it happy #followed #i have this running inside joke thing #that ive been followed around by the same benign ghosty spirit since my first apartment #started as #which was the ominous sound our water heater would make before our pipes would back up and barf raw sewage into our kitchen #so we started appeasing it with goofy offerings #and would talk to it regularly to so it would barf in our aink #then it me home to become a buzzing and gurgling noise in our freezer #then back to ominous pipe aounds in another apartment #and my first apt with my husband it was in our heater #and we would chat to it while making dinner cuz it was in the utility closet right there #then a creaky mystery noise in my in-laws place #abd now it's phantom crackles and taps on the monitor #but only one #even tho they both relay from the same base #and it's always whichever one for the room we're in #it was creepy at first #but since we decided it's just The Spirit #it's like whatever #but man it gets awkward when i talk to The Spirit in front of guests who are panicking about spooky phantom taps and scrapes