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heartorbit · 6 months

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Ur last posts tags spoke to me personally. Like magical girl, swan lake, and little prince gachas? Yes, yes, and yes! Ive been rotating these in my head for so long.

"It is your own fault," said the little prince. "I never wished you any sort of harm; but you wanted me to tame you..."

"Yes, that is so," said the fox.

"But now you are going to cry!" said the little prince.

"Yes, that is so," said the fox.

"Then it has done you no good at all!"

"It has done me good," said the fox, "because of the color of the wheat fields."

^ this is SO wxs like oh my god. I’d love to know what role u think they’d be in the story

And idk much abt the other stories you said but I trust they would also slap as gachas

oh i love you. listen

i could honestly make a case for any wxs member in any role but i think the best fits for their characters are emu as the little prince, rui as the narrator, nene as the fox and tsukasa as the rose. or perhaps it's my emu favoritism talking

i'm not even sure how to justify or explain myself for each decision. source: trust me bro. emu has held on to her whimsy but lives in loneliness and rui has had his creativity stomped down throughout his life and nene's timidness gives way to her earnest desire to connect with other people and tsukasa cried and threw up because he's not special. does anyone understand me

again i think there's argument to be had for other roles, i think they could all potentially fit as the narrator in some way or another. or like, tsukasa as the little prince or nene as the rose or emu or rui as the fox could all work too. come into my inbox and send anons saying im super wrong so i have an excuse to talk about it more please.

OK wxs swan lake i will wait for until my final breath like they can't just make one of emu and rui's cheerful carnival team names "the duck and the crow" and expect me to NOT make this about princess tutu. you're joshing me colopal. though i think rui and nene would pass away doing ballet i know they are not doing their stretches sorry

#ask #anon #this ask sat for a week bc i Had to draw smth for this but well. heh. My midterms #thank yoy anon.#i wub you.#nene as the fox is kind of exploding me now its a short appareance bit the more i think about it the more i 🎺💥#and this quote specifically reminds me of her our happy ending card... cry together #you didnt ssk for all this but well actually you did. my bad #DONT GET ME STAAARTED ON WXS SWANLAKE the event in my mind it is crazy. its necer leaving my mind but just trust #i think emu and tsukasa realistically would be the only ones who could pull off the sctual ballet the prima has to do #but also nene or rui as odile would kill me 1000 times. I know traditionally ofette + odile is performed by one prima. but. the Themes #ok thats enough out of me adios #god bless adding read mores on mobile

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padfootastic · 2 years

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thinking of toddler harry who’s very, very attached to his godfather sirius (as he should be, really) and gets pissy whenever he goes for work. (yes, sirius is a 9-5er here. suspend all disbelief, folks)

so, to get a handle on the tantrums, sirius dresses harry in his own little formal clothes, robes and over cloak and silver clasp and fake wand holder and all.

‘look, siri, im just like you!’ harry says, every morning like clockwork. once they look absolutely alike, hair combed and tied neatly (little butterfly clips in sirius’ curls, ofc), they set off for the day. sirius conjures a little size-appropriate desk for him that he can sit at, gets him a briefcase and all. when u open it, it has all sorts of colouring materials, beads and strings and charms for DIY, and a little notepad with a pen for Serious Stuff.

throughout the day, sirius gets his work done while harry carefully does his own stuff. whenever he gets too fidgety, sirius sends him out on a ‘mission’—going out and evaluating how the rest of the employees are doing their work. harry, of course, takes his task super seriously and tries to emulate sirius’ Grown Up Face very diligently, walking with his hands behind his back and an adorable little frown on his face. of course, he’s so short he can’t actually see what anyone’s doing but everyone’s accommodating enough that he has enough information to relay it back to sirius in his office.

at the end of the day, both of them take their cloaks off the hanger, simultaneously sling it over their shoulders, and wave a goodbye to the remaining members in the office. when they get home, harry is still meticulously copying sirius’ actions so he neatly sets his shoes to the side, hangs his cloak on the rack, and falls face first into the sofa with an exhausted sigh of relief.

‘being a adult is hard, padfoot,’ is the last thing he says before drifting off to sleep.

#harry potter #sirius black #good godfather sirius black #i know i haven’t interacted w this side of the fandom in a hot sec #but man i haven’t had an original thought in weeks lol #hoping to slowly work up to writing fic again #i can’t decide if this is a jily lives au w third parent sirius or a canon divergent au where sirius raises harry hmmm #both work really #and ykno i’m always a sucker for more james #but yah. this one’s just our fav boys spending some quality time together #i’m just imagining harry dressed up exactly like sirius #and sirius going to his super professional job with kids hair accessories and glitter on his kids #his eye lids* smh #also yes harry is an unnaturally well behaved child here but that’s the beauty of fiction 🥰#sirius’ job is not specified for a reason #being that i couldn’t decide what it was lol #i was thinking lawyer? but yeah it’s irrelevant #also didnf know how to end this. guess we’re back on our bullshit 🥰#pen’s notes

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thedreadvampy · 5 months

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My housemate is moving out in January

She told us this a week or two ago, when she sat down and, after sitting with us watching TV for over an hour, said "hey so I bought a house and I'm moving out. We agreed on 2 months notice so I won't move until the end of January."

The last time she talked in the immediate terms about buying a house was in 2021, when the sale she was working on fell though and she was unemployed so it was a "when I'm back in a position to look I'll start looking again." Since then I've occasionally asked her how she's doing on the house buying front and she's been like "oh I'm getting there financially" but hasn't mentioned anything concrete.

She didn't tell us she was looking at places. She didn't tell us she had put in an offer. She told us when the offer was finalised. A week AFTER she emailed the letting agent about getting out of her part of the lease. And, it increasingly feels like, only because the letting agent's response was that we had to agree to change the lease.

The letting agent's response (which our housemate obviously didn't copy us into; we had to follow up separately and they copied us into the email chain) also includes that when we change the lease, they're empowered to change the rent, quote, "no cap". Rent was already going up in January - there's no possibility of Sam and I paying her share of the rent.

The really fucking upsetting thing is we're not strangers. This isn't a casual "housemate we found on flatshare" thing. She and Sam have lived together literally their entire adult lives. Me and her have known each other well over a decade. I lived in her and Sam's flat when I was homeless. We were the first people she came out to as trans. We're not super close but I thought we were fucking friends. And she's literally gone out of her way to not talk to us about this for what must have been months while the sale completed - which means she's lied to my face at least once cause I've asked her about her finances in that time (cause she's in a job she hates that she only took to get the house money, so it's like. when we've been commiserating about work stuff I'm often asking 'are you almost free?'). she literally went out of her way to talk to the letting agents before talking to us about putting us in a situation where we could lose our fucking home.

And she keeps. trying. to pretend nothing's happened. Every time I've seen her since then she's not mentioned anything or apologised or anything, she just keeps chatting away and offering hugs and fistbumps like nothing's happened. Like we're still fucking friends.

All it would take for us to still be friends and to be happy for her would have been one fucking sentence in the groupchat like "hey, just put an offer in on a house" or "I'm looking at properties, just so you know, that might happen in the next few months". Like nobody begrudges her for buying a house! It's very cool for her! She's 31 she's worked really hard to get the money I would love to be happy for her! Unfortunately she decided avoiding conflict is more important than giving the people she fucking LIVES WITH (who btw fronted her a month on the rent here while she was unemployed and agreed to take on a larger proportion of the move-in cost back in 2021, if we're still holding ourselves to shit we said 2.5 years ago), so no, you are not entitled to our friendship or to going back to normal.

like if she'd been honest with us it would have been something to process but we'd have had time to figure out our next steps. instead she's left us in a position where we have to find a new roommate before she gives her one month notice, which means finding someone by the end of December, which oh look that's the middle of the fucking Christmas holidays. and she didn't tell us anything until the START of December, or copy us into her conversation with the letting agent, meaning we still don't know what the rent on that space will be so we aren't yet in a position to advertise it. Has she offered to help find a roommate? Has she fuck. Has she offered to help out by moving her move-out date? Nah, she's moving as soon as she gets the keys because, quote, "that means her finances won't have to change". SOUNDS LOVELY. NOT HAVING YOUR FINANCES SUDDENLY CHANGE. I THINK THAT SOUNDS LIKE A REALLY REASONABLE FUCKING GOAL.

Thirteen fucking years she's lived with Sam. Four fucking weeks over Christmas she's left us to figure out a way to not turbofuck our living situation. And she's got the fucking nerve to try and pretend we should be interacting like nothing's changed. Jesus Christ. What a fucking unhinged way to treat...anybody, honestly. never mind the friends-your-entire-adult-life part. literally cannot imagine a scenario in which I would buy a house without telling the people I lived with.

(haha actually this is what my parents divorced over so apparently it's not unusual. although at least my dad had the decency to tell the woman he shared finances with at the point he put in an offer not the point the fucking sale went through.)

Like we'll be fine. It's a huge city centre flat with decent rent and queer housemates, hopefully even when the rent goes up it'll be an easy sell in a city with a huge housing shortage and big queer community. We've got a couple of people interested already, sight unseen - worst case scenario we have to live with someone we don't get on with. And it's given Sam and me a push to look at our own finances and as of today, we've got a mortgage decision in principle and can start looking at flats in the area - mind, we'll be transparent upfront and tell any prospective housemates that yeah, we're looking to buy and move out in the next 6-12 months, and we'll tell them if we put an offer in, because we're decent fucking people who aren't going to spring that on someone out of the blue.

But it's been I think 2 weeks and I'm so fucking angry I could spit. It's such a fucking betrayal. And frankly you know selfishly like. I just had a breakup a couple of months ago, I'm in the middle of moving jobs, both me and Sam have a history of housing instability and this has been the first decent, stable, safe, not-mouldy not-freezing home I think any of us have had, and this is so fucking triggering and upscuttling I could just start biting. like I was talking to my friend about it last week and it's just like. Can I have One Fucking Thing of the three main tentpoles of survival - home, work, relationships - that are fucking stable right now? because shit has been In Flux lately. and at least the work and relationship stuff has changed because of my decisions. going through all that work to make myself short-term unstable to gain long-term stability has been really hard and draining and then just as I was reaching the crisis point with work stuff BOOM, IT'S HOUSING INSTABILITY WITH A STEEL CHAIR. fuck. seriously fuck this and fuck her. we're going to make something good come of it but what a deeply, unbelievably shitty thing to do.

#red said #the other thing that bugs me about it is. ok and again this is old shit dredged back to 2021 when we moved in together #but i had my housemate. and Sam had her. and each of us were really close pairs who'd lived together a long time #and we tried looking for flats as a four but a) a flat with 4 good sized bedrooms in Edinburgh is hens teeth #and b) my housemate was pretty happy to live with me and Sam but increasingly felt like a 4 man flat was going to be a lot for him #and so in the end we talked about it. and through a combination of that and same housemate being in a pretty #unfavorable position housing wise. cause she was unemployed and had shit credit at that moment.#we agreed she'd move with us and Joe went and found a one bed #and in the end that's been really great for him tbh he's a lot happier and more confident and we were pretty sick of each other by then #and so we get on much better now #but at the time it was a real heartache i felt like I'd let Joe down i felt like our friendship was over #and honestly I have never been a huge fan of living with our current housemate. even before we lived here #like when i was staying with her and Sam too. she's incredibly messy and takes up a lot of space in conversations #I've always liked her as a person but she's exhausting and often unpleasant to share space with #and there's a bit of me that's like. we bent over backwards to accommodate you when you were precarious.#like it would have been WAY easier for us to look for a 2-bed during 2021. and if it was a 3-bed I'd have rather stayed with Joe.#but we moved with her for her sake. and she left Sam to clean up their old place (and there were Literal Rats)#and she got really pissy about driving the moving van even though a) that was her idea and b) she's the only person with a license #and c) i walked all MY shit over by hand anyway and the only reason she hired the van was to move her tv #me and Sam found all the core furniture. me and Sam sorted out all the viewings. me and Sam did all the planning. Sam set up all the bills.#we spotted her for rent!we took a bigger share of the costs! because we fucking cared about her and wanted her to have a fucking home!#and she can't even do us the courtesy you'd offer a fucking lodger you found on fucking gumtree

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hella1975 · 4 months

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there's a very specific kind of vibe that comes with living with your friends in final year that it just does not have in first year or even second year. like as a fresher it's usually the first time any of you have lived away from home let alone with SO MANY people your age and it's terrifying and exciting and randomised to boot so it's generally carnage for a whole year in the best and worst ways, and then second year you pick who you're living with and it feels like for the first time you're doing this adult thing PROPERLY. you have a place of your own now. these are the people you've chosen to live with. studying gets serious etc. but it's still fresh. it's still new. you still don't know how to navigate it. but final year? final year is when you actually get it right. you know how to manage your time better. you know what works for you and what doesn't. studying is the main focus and you've been out in the world for three years now and it's not loud and boisterous like it was in first year and you're not exciteable and awkward like you were in second year. you're comfortable. every single one of my flatmates has their own friend group and we mainly keep to our own social circles, but we'll still meet each other back at the house after a night out and sit in the kitchen or my room to do the debrief. sometimes i'll go days not seeing either of them despite sharing a house but every now and then someone will softly call up the stairs that 'the heating's on!' or one of us will sneeze and the other two will yell 'bless you!' through the walls. the lack of interaction isn't interpreted as dislike in ways it would have been even last year, because we're all just old enough to be past that now and settled enough in our friendship not to worry about it. idk. uni is very loud and unsettling a lot of the time so it's been really sweet to see how almost boringly comfortable final year is.

#like my day today was literally drag myself out of bed at 10am to meet my econ friends bc we're in a group together #and i spent two hours with them writing a fucking TRADE REPORT before coming home #and the rest of the day was kinda lost. i showered. i put a wash on. i had a nap. i mainly stayed in my room #which sometimes is the End Of All Things but today was quite nice #and i can hear in their rooms how my flatmates are doing the exact same thing. pottering about and getting on with uni #and we've barely spoken all day but earlier my one flatmate ran into my room all excited to show me her nails #bc she's been teaching herself to do gels and it took her 2 hours but im still one of the first people she wanted to show #and just now we all went to use the bathroom at the same time and it led to one of our Stair Sessions #where we all inexplicably just gather on the stairs and chat for no reason with a cup of tea #idk it's just nice. it's such basic shit but i can't belive in first year i used to spend EVERY DAY with these girls #and we were one single friendship group and that was all we had #and then in second year one girl branched off bc she lived in a studio and got into her societies #but me and the other girl lived together again and it was the same thing of she was a friend before she was someone i lived with #and weirdly that can actually be detrimental to a dynamic. but this year we're all just very solidified and confident in ourselves #and where we stand and yes we all have our own friendship groups outside of the house now #but there's still that love and simple comfortableness around each other that you only get with time and a hell of a lot of proximity #and a sense of being settled that maybe is just what happens as you get older #idk it's just really nice. if i had this exact same day in first year (doing economics and barely leaving my room)#it would've been a really bad depressive day for me so the fact i can find such contentment from it now is really heartening #i love my little life here im very proud of what ive been able to achieve :)#hella goes to uni #feeling nostalgic because SOME BITCH decided to ribs post

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taylorrepdetective · 5 months

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Since you like to say you’re always right, tell us what is next. You say you don’t make predictions, but you actually do, even if you don’t call them that.

Ok so I’m absolutely not always right. There have been some really big things I’ve been wrong about and a lot of small things too. And what I learned from that is to keep an open mind, and when I’m wrong about something, to figure out why I got it wrong and shift my world view in some ways to try to understand and guess better the next time. But it’s not even really about being able to guess. It’s about understanding when things happen. It is fun to be right on a guess though, when that happens.

The biggest thing I’ve learned, and luckily I learned it pretty early on in my time in this space, is that trying to figure out the timing something big will happen is absolutely a fools errand. And another thing to avoid is trying to come up with the exact, specific way Taylor (or others in her cinematic universe) will do something to get a point across. Like I can predict she will try to get a point across (set up a timeline, create a narrative, shore up a brand point) but I cannot predict exactly how or when she’ll do it. I also can predict she’ll set something up but then she never does. That’s because I think of lots of options. Some happen, some don’t. So this is the kind of thing I’m often wrong about. But I see them and always try to present them as options, not predictions. And if one of the options I think of happens, I have already spent time thinking about it, so it already makes sense to me.

I don’t know what’s next. She could drop TS11 at midnight. She could break up with Travis tomorrow, or announce her engagement next week. But I do not think any of those things is likely.

So here’s the closest thing you’ll ever get to me making a specific, timed prediction, because to me it seems quite clear:

What I do think is likely is that her jet will go to KC, ✅she’ll go to the game on Sunday✅, and her jet will then leave KC sometime between next Tuesday✅ and next Thursday. Why? Because it’s a home game, and she likes to go to home games and get the exposure and publicity that comes with that. She is working really hard at becoming an icon in KC, seem like her relationship is very serious for those who want to believe it’s serious, and she wants to shore up that relationship by spending time with him, his family, and his friends (also KC icons - the Mahomes mostly.)✅ All of this is so important to the story she’s creating. However, she won’t stay long ✅because that’s been her pattern. She also seems to be establishing that she also has her own busy, fabulous life✅ (she’s bejeweled and he lets her be✅) and when he’s busy with his football week (generally Tuesday-Sunday) he doesn’t have much time for her and she has her own life.✅This gives her the opposite option of the relationship being very serious. In other words it gives her an easy out for it to end. And Wednesday is her birthday. So she’ll either stay till Tuesday ✅and we’ll see or hear about birthday celebrations Sunday night/Monday, ✅then she’ll head out for further birthday celebrations with her other friends and family✅, or her jet will stay through her birthday, solidifying the seriousness of the relationship. But she will leave KC.✅ And then she’ll probably go to the game on Dec 17 in Boston✅. Why? Because it is a short hop from NYC, she has a huge fanbase there✅ and can expand it and shore it up, the patriots are bad so a win is likely✅, but they are a very popular team, so viewership (publicity) will be high✅. After that? Well she’s likely to spend more time in NYC✅/Nashville. Then she will probably go to the Christmas Day game in KC✅. This is a huge opportunity to “take the relationship to the next level” by spending the holidays together ✅, something the public absolutely loves to see and will further fuel the “engaged by the end of the year, after the Super Bowl at the latest” fire. Hopefully we’ll get something reputation-related for new years❌, so the extra publicity will help with that. Additionally all of this corresponds with the Eras film being released to streaming, another huge money making opportunity for her, and her attendance is an ad for the film.

After the new year, there will be some huge games with high viewership. They will be playing for playoff seeding. Then they almost assuredly will be in the playoffs✅. She will go to those games✅, which have even higher viewership, and will give her more free marketing for reputation and eras movie and anything else we don’t know about. After that, it will depend on how deep they go into the playoffs. They are no longer favored to be in the Super Bowl, but it is still a strong possibility✅. We all now know she can fly across the world after a concert to attend an event (she flew to the US during her time in SA, planned to a second time but couldn’t because of the events in Rio, and flew to London for 24 hrs for bey). The precedent has been set for her to fly from Tokyo to Las Vegas for the Super Bowl. ✅There is no bigger stage than the Super Bowl (outside of the World Cup final, if you’re thinking internationally.) The free marketing potential there is something that would be very hard for her to pass up. And if Travis isn’t playing, Jason’s team might be, and they can go together to support him. Imagine the potential of travlor in a suite together with mama and papa kelce cheering on a retiring Jason❌✅ . And even if neither of them are in the game, they could still all go together and stand in a suite as a big happy family in front of an audience of 115 million Americans. Why wouldn’t she do this?✅

Will all that happen for sure? Of course not. But you can see the logic, right? Will there be other things that happen that I haven’t thought of? Most likely.✅ I don’t actually have a crystal ball. What kinds of things could derail this? Well there’s always the possibility of the black swan, but a more likely scenario is they lose again against a team they should beat✅ and/or Travis has another bad game✅. There is a real danger of people turning on her as a distraction ✅and I think they have their fingers on the pulse of this very closely. As long as KC keeps winning, and there’s a good chance they will win the rest of their games, all will be smooth❌✅.

Also I am not even thinking beyond February. I have one interesting thought about it, but it’s just too speculative to even mention here. But as we move through the next two months, I’ll get clues to be able to guess at what will happen after she goes back on tour after the Super Bowl✅. And if I’m wrong about all of this, which I may very well be because she is notoriously unpredictable sometimes, I will simply take it as a learning opportunity to understand her better.✅

#I’m editing the tags as time goes on to note what I got right and how and adding checks and can writhing the post #People mag confirmed they celebrated her bday Monday in KC and he’s busy and she’s busy and she will have a party w/o him in nyc #and were sure to mentioned he is focused on football #and he’s gotten some criticism for dropping passes and that flop #he had a bad game vs patriots and hasn’t had a good game in weeks #she’s still doing fine other than the Mahomes continuing ick #Travis essentially confirmed she went to Gillette. decide of her strong fanbase. bad team means cheap tix for swifties to take over #don’t know for sure but looks like she wants everyone to think she’s in KC for the week #a big football analyst tweeted she’s a distraction after the Christmas loss #they didn’t win the rest of their games and they struggled at the end of the season there and Travis struggled but #he miraculously hit his act together in time to help lead his team to the Super Bowl cementing his place as the elite TE and saved the day #and happiness is everywhere because the goal (SB and adorable power couple of the year) was met #next Grammys and Super Bowl for her and him going to shows in Australia I’m guessing #got the kelce family plus Taylor importance right but didn’t mention the possibility of Jason not in SB but in suite with tay.#obvious but sonce I didn mt mention it I gave myself a partial green check #one thing I didn’t know was about TTPD instead of a new re-recording #we already got our People article that he is looking forward to joining her on tour in Europe

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notanotherinfjblog · 1 year

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Productivity

ENTJ: Do you know those moments when you’ve got so much to do that you have no idea where to even start and so you start making a list of things that are too unimportant to waste your time on right now? But at the same time you’re wasting time by not working on the things that actually are important. You’re just making lists of all the tiny aspects of your work that you can throw out just to make yourself feel like you’re doing something.

INFJ: No, I don’t know those moments. I’m less productive, you see. When I’m overwhelmed by all the stuff I have to do, I panic and stare at the wall for three hours.

ENTJ: You’ve been doing that a lot lately, haven’t you?

INFJ: ... yes.

#i feel like it has to be said that we only had this conversation because entj didn't have the motivation to work anymore today #so he came to my office to make me procrastinate with him together for an hour and then he left to do the same to our estj co-worker #he's such an idiot i love talking to him #every time i meet another NJ (which happens like once every 100 years) i slightly lose it a little #because talking to someone else with Ni is like suddenly being allowed to breathe #suddenly there's someone who actually speaks your language and there's never just one second of silence because there's so much to say!!#(is that how people with more common functions get to feel frequently? like SPs meeting other SPs? SJs meeting SJs?)#also it's very funny to be on the receiving end of the Ni stare because all of us NJs do that #so whenever you see two (not romantically involved) people just staring at each other's eyes for two hours you've found two NJs #my intj brother has a problem with eye contact actually but he STILL DOES THIS just not when you're looking too #this has nothing to do with the post but you know me #maybe i'll do a more elaborate post about the ni stare at some point #also i'm gonna post the list with the writer interviews very soon took a bit longer than i had anticipated and i still only have one isfp #but oh well what can you do #mbti #mbti conversations #entj #infj

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crescentfool · 4 months

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with the year coming to a close, i hope that anyone who's reflecting about how the year went remembers to be kind and fair to themselves with how you evaluate the year as a whole.

i think there are definitely times when life throws things that are... Not So Great at you. whether if it's some external circumstance that surprised you, or maybe your mentality wasn't at it's best. i wish for anyone who's encountered those kinds of challenges to be able to triumph over them and be able to say that they got through it.

heck, it might still be a work in progress even though you've kept chipping away at it, and that's ok! the results will show themselves eventually as you work through it! and i hope that we can all remember to be patient with ourselves as we go through these processes (learning, healing, etc.), because damn, it can be frustrating when you feel like you're "not there yet."

knowing that life can be rough at times, i think it's unfair to yourself (and others) to discount and downplay any progress you've made this year- whether if it's something that you did for the first time, or maybe you came to a new understanding and insight that you didn't have in the previous year.

it's not to say that you should undermine the validity of your experience with hardship, but to take the time to remind yourself what makes life worth living. to recall what moments were the most satisfying to you- and use it to strengthen your resolve for the next year and beyond. no amount of hardship will ever take away from the fact that you deserve to have hope that things will get better.

i hope that looking back on the year, you don't leave out the things you cherish. that you can remember the good that came this year. whether if the small victories are things like meeting someone new, trying something out for the first time, or making some strides in a long-term project/obligation...!

i wish everyone a happy new year! may it be prosperous, and that your life can move in a direction that's close to what you want out of life. you're all going to do great! remember to congratulate yourself for what you did well! despite everything, you're still here, and that's wonderful. never forget that!

#lizzy speaks #hello everyone. i know that there are *checks calendar* still 20 days left of december and 2023 #but i've had a lot of strong emotions and feelings i've had to sort through as i've been thinking about how 2023 went for me #so a lot of what i've written here comes from the perspective of someone in their early 20s #it's like... a crash and burn from when you were a teenager thinking that you know everything #and realizing how big the world is and how many responsibilities there are #all while a feeling of overwhelm looms over as you try to sift your way through the world and adjust your understanding of it #for me i've definitely had an underlying thought that 'you should have your shit together by now why aren't you there yet'#and it's! not motivating! at all! to think that way. and it's made me more than ever want to be a friend to myself. to extend a patient-#kind voice to myself that reminds me that others are also trying to navigate these feelings and to accept that i'm not going to have an-#instantaneous understanding of how one goes about adulthood. and neither will they. even if they look 'put together.'#like... these people have also undergone similar stresses and along the way figured out how to navigate through that space #and personally i've found peace in knowing that there are people who are older than me. trusting that they've dealt with these things too i #some shape or form and that them living... being here.. is proof that we shall be fine in the end and that we will move past what plagues-#our mind. there's definitely been some... anger i've had this year that. school didnt teach me these things or skills!! i was so mad lol #but hey if we are little guys who are living on planet earth for the first time we shouldn't condemn ourselves to an unrealistic standard-#of going through life and being able to instantly do everything 'correctly' and know how everything works #i'm still working on improving that patience... and also trying to put in the work to understand these things.#in the midst of a very tough week for me i was tempted to say that 'nothing happened this year it was not productive'#but then i was like. that's. objectively not true if you just look at other things. also theres worth in life outside of 'productivity'#...i think i passed 20 tags at this point. but like. my favorite thing about 2023 was meeting so many cool awesome people!#who would've known that funny lil squid game could bring so many connections and friendships i cherish!#thank you so much! for being a part of my life and changing me for the better! for giving me many fond memories!#and i'm very grateful to anyone who supported me and my art this year... for sticking around even though i wished i could do more #it means the world to me knowing that there's proof that i exist and have touched someone's life in a positive way! thank you! truly!#ANYWAY. happy early new year. i hope everyone can nourish a friend in their head that extends acceptance and patience to themselves #as we try and make sense of the world together. there will be things that we don't understand yet! but one day we will! and it'll be like #wow! look how far i came! i'm okay! i'm alive! yipee! thank you for reading this post i made to get my feelings out! have a nice day!

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randomnameless · 5 months

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FE 25 :

Uwu:(...) I question the way in which our society is designed. No matter what strength a person has, it is the station he is born into that controls his destiny. And you cannot control where you will be born. Do you believe that a person of low birth should simply endure the curse of his station? I think not. If you are stronger than those around you, you should benefit from your strength. This is why I will use my strength to remake this world. Class and rank will not matter. Human and sub-human will not matter. The strong will possess everything. The weak will submit to their will. Is this not the meaning of peace? A subhuman: Are you saying that the lives of those without strength have no value?

Uwu : If after all of this you believe the weak will still be weak, that is only because they are too used to relying on others instead of on themselves. A barbarian and potential subhuman lover : There are those who cannot live without their faith... and those who cannot go on once they have lost their reason for living. Your path will not be able to save them. It is the path of the strong, and so, it could only benefit the strong.

Uwu: That is the natural order. The only way for the weak to survive is to cling to the strong. Our discussion is over. Tell me, frail little bird who cannot fight; which do you choose? Submission? Or death? A subhuman: …Life proffered to me by your hand is something I would never accept! A barbarian and potential subhuman lover : (...) I finally understand…what you believe is right.

The context is different, Dimi has a special background with Supreme Leader and is her step-brother, so it makes sense trying to reach for her and at least try to understand what is going on in her mind, than Reyson, a frail and weak laguz by birth, trying to understand and reach out for Ashnard.

But are we really supposed to think Dimi's reply here is pretty different because he personally knew his Ashnard? Or because he isn't a weak and frail thing by birth, like Reyson, so he isn't as angry or as passionate in his replies?

I know this scene plays a role in Dimitri's arc - he tries to reach out for her (hand) when he earlier only wanted to end her life, because he isn't driven by revenge or vengeance anymore and wants to save people, even Supreme Leader.

So this convo is less about Supreme Leader and more about him.

And yet, imo, this always felt sort of wrong, because while Dimitri cannot do a thing for the people who are already dead (killing Supreme Leader won't bring them back, he has to think about the living now and not to avenge the dead) - Dimitri is still talking to someone who gave means and opportunities (and fodder!) to Izuka to create Feral Ones thus most likely knows there is a Gritnea Tower around, started a war and killed thousands, was involved (as far as he knows?) in the brutal killing of his family and has pretty biased views on Laguz.

Of course in the following scenes and maps, he resolves to put an end to the war thus defeat her, and we know Supreme Leader refuses his mercy and prefers to die - but the way this development is frailed is not a straight up rejection of her POV or her so called "IdEaLs", but it's framed as a tragedy because Dimitri couldn't "save" her.

No, kill that, it's even worse :

We have no choice but to destroy each other… Such is the destiny we were born to.

Now this fight - aka Dimitri wanting to put an end to Ashnard's war - is the result of fate, and not the will/choices both parties made to reach that point (which is, in a way, hilarious, because he mentions just after his line her "iron will", so pick your horse Dimitri, is this war the result of fate/destiny, or is it due to Ashnard's "iron will"?).

Ultimately, the themes and arcs of both games are different, so it's no wonder that the solution each Lord(s) offer is different - Elincia wants to avenge her parents and justice for her dead countrymen, Reyson wants to have the right to exist even if he is a weak thing by birth, Ike is out of the loop / Dimitri wants to accept Supreme Leader and "save" her because vengeance and justice drove him to a wall and got his close father figure killed, Dimitri now wants to protect the living, even Supreme Leader herself (or at least he tries).

So even if Ashnard and Supreme Leader share the same dubious ideals, keep a lizard in cage/captivity, used feral ones and started wars - the reaction to them is different, because the Lords have different character arcs and development.

That being said, even with all his character development, would a post-Rodrigue death Dimitri who, idk, is warped in FE9's Tellius, after befriending Laguz, witnessing racism, seeing Gritnea and the "wildlife experiments", witnessing Daein's army ruining civilians, learning about Lillia, Rajaion, etc etc, would that Dimitri still have reached his hand out to Ashnard upon his defeat?

If we want to stay in Fodlan, a Dimitri who befriends Nabateans (who reveals themselves to be Nabateans!), learns about the Relics, learns about Supreme Leader's goal to free the world from their existence because their race isn't allowed to have power over humans, seeing Gritnea or at least still giving fucks about the humans who were painfully transformed in Demonic Beasts (and maybe solving the question about who are they made from, random Adrestian civilians or war prisoners?), reacting to Ferdie's paralogue, learning about Rhea's zumba lessons in her 5 stars resort, etc etc, would this Dimitri still have reached his hand out to a Supreme Leader whose core belief (or least one of them) is Nabateans shouldn't be allowed to live in Fodlan, and Faerghus and Leicester should never have existed and should return to her?

Of course the game makes it so that we will never learn the answer to that second situation, because Hresvelg Tea and whatnot, but if we want to stay true to his character arc, then AM!Dimitri would still have reached out for her hand.

A Dimitri who becomes the kind of ruler Elincia is after her arc in FE10... wouldn't have at all.

#typing about the game's hresvelg grey made me think about this issue #to think the writers had the nerve to have Dimitri mention 'uwu destiny fault' when he took time to talk and understand Supreme Leader's PO #and 2 seconds later mention her own will #like you can see IS casually adding more tea in there bcs uwu maybe there's a path where everyone can walk together #plz cry it's a tragedy that you have to rekt Supreme Leader :(#no wonder why no one seems to give a fuck about her lizard prejudice it's not mentioned at all bar optional convos in SS and VW #or it's locked to her route #Baldo'n'Waldi? Who gives a fuck #sure Supreme Leader deflects the convo in the parley #but there's no fire against her uwu ideals #instead we focus on the personal tragedy between the two of them who cannot accept each other's reasoning #'i think a good nabatean is a relic they cannot exist in our world' 'wtf' 'agree to disagree' 'okay'#the writers knew it would look stupid and nonsensical so instead we get this scene #Supreme Reply replies yes to Reyson's question #and then the convo ends with Supreme Leader starting the 'ok agree to disagree let's fight later' and we have the dagger scene

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lesbianspeedy · 9 months

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i need people to understand that we are halfway through the intended length of GA 2023 and only 7.5 of the 17 (SEVENTEEN) characters on the first cover have appeared so far

#the .5 is for hal #i hope the rest show up in a montage in the end credits #as we go on…we remember…[black and white pic of mia fades in] all the times we…had together..#and as our lives change..[emi looks forlornly in the distance]…come whatever…#we will still be…[cissie looks directly into the camera wondering why she’s here]…friends forever…

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raeofgayshine · 4 days

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I wish I could go back and tell younger me that I would in fact find that place one day full of people that I adore deeply and who I know love me in return. Who make me feel wanted and cared for and appreciated in a way I never thought would be possible. And none of it required hiding, or forcing myself to be a person I’m not. And I still have that space even though I’m aroace.

For the first time ever, I see a future where I’m not alone. And I wish I could go back and tell my younger self it would happen. It’s possible to not be constantly lonely.

#ravenpuff rambles #I’ve been lucky enough in my life to make amazing friends several times #several of whom are still in my life now #but it’s only been recently that I’ve felt like I truly found my place #I don’t know how to explain it #I guess up until now I have always gone into friendships expecting them to end and holding back just a little bit #and this is the first time I don’t feel like I have to run because I don’t feel like these people are going to leave me #maybe it’s just because one of them is also aroace and we’ve talked a lot about those similar feelings of being left behind #never had someone quite get that before #and maybe it’s just I feel more willing to open my heart #admittedly this group of ours went through some shit together and that’s how the friendships really started forming #and so maybe that helps #but it’s like #Have you ever met someone who is so much like you in so many ways that its like the joke of ‘#‘can I copy your homework?’ ‘yeah just be sure to change it so no one knows’#It’s a weird thing of feeling so completely and totally seen by somebody sometimes without having to say a word #anyways #I’m really happy with this little place I found and I wish I could tell younger me #and also tell xem that no it doesn’t look like a fanfic dream #no im not their person but yeah they’re kind of mine but that’s okay #its nothing and everything like I always thought of #and for the first time in my life I don’t feel a crush sense of loneliness #yes I wish I could see them in person #but I can be okay with everything I do get

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sleepyagent · 2 months

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Its ok, I know the door is closed

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currentlyonstandbi · 1 year

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I am nothing in my soul if not obsessive.

#yeah thats right we now return to our regular broadcast of angst posting about this film after a brief interruption of textpost memes #did not realise there's only a 10 photo limit to each post lmao i've never hit it before until now #so i had to go back and turn the 3 sets of individuals images into 1 image to i could fit them all #fun times for me #🤡🤡🤡#anyway i finished the secret history just over a week or so ago and even though i've moved on to the song of achilles now it still haunts me #like minds #murderous intent #like minds (2006)#nigel colbie #alex forbes #tom sturridge #eddie redmayne #nigel colbie x alex forbes #the secret history #donna tartt #i think whatever inspired this post is diagnosable in the dsm-v #sorry if this makes absolutely 0 sense i think reading the book provides a lot of the context for it #putting all the scenes together really had me realising how many times nigel traumatised poor alex over the course of the film #and the colbie house incident isn't even here. no wonder he's evil by the end of it

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faebriel · 5 months

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hgs brainrot has returned due to tbosas .. speaking of hgs here’s an ask abt the hgs au: if things were totally different, and Wilbur were to be a 12 victor, what do you think a possible mentor-tribute dynamic would look like between him & Niki? I feel like it would be similar to Snow & Lucy in the way that he’s just going out of his way to cheat n help her

anon u have in fact struck jackpot because this is a concept i was spinning some thoughts abt before bee mentioned avoxes and we went OOOOH at that!!! so yes i have considered rainduo as a mentor-tribute dynamic and would love to talk about that concept too :]

so for this concept i think wilbur and niki would be close friends throughout childhood from 12, and then in their teens wilbur is reaped and, well, no one has particularly high hopes (he's a writer and a musician at heart, not a fighter) but through sheer trickery and dumb luck, he makes it to the end of the games. wilbur pulled some pretty fucked up tricks to win - when you can't use brute force, you have to use your brain - and partly due to the trauma of the games, partly due to his shame and survivor's guilt, he sinks into the capitol and relishes a new life there as a socialite. to him, the old wilbur died in the games and the new one has taken his place - to niki, and to his other friends in 12, whatever the games did to him made him into every vapid heartless capitol victor there is.

or. niki has her doubts. they all saw how horrible the games were, but surely there is some part of him left, some part that's hurting, even if it's buried deep?

anyway.

like og spin of the au, niki is reaped and this sucks - this time she does expect wilbur as her mentor on the train, and she expects some kind of warm welcome (maybe even an apology for leaving them so suddenly and silently? an explanation?) but she gets jack shit. wilbur is jaded and cruel and unrecognisable and niki entirely hates it. this is the part where i REALLY WISH we got some time of those two beefing with each other directly in canon (or at least interactions while niki was So Mad at him) but it's okay we fly blind. niki feels abandoned, lonely, thrown off of her kilter - she expected an ally in this place, but she doesn't recognise the person wilbur has become. she doesn't recognise his shallowness (...much), his ruthless advice for the arena, the way he doesn't seem to care for anything. she's scared and now she's lonely and it pisses her off - their mentorship is fraught. here are some thoughts from discord on that:

i tend to think of niki as a bit naïve before l'manberg or even doomsday - i think this is an au where this streak would come out real strong, and niki is stubborn that she can get through the games without losing herself. stubborn that she can stop things, that she can protect people. i don't think wilbur is cold enough (or, really, can bear to say aloud) to say that her odds in the arena are slim enough as it is, but he definitely tells her that she's making enemies and that her odds of survival dwindle with the more trouble she causes.

beyond that... hm. niki's trust in wilbur is almost unshakeable until nov 16, even when she outright says she doesn't recognise him anymore. i think she'd reluctantly listen re: don't burn down any buildings, but she would grow bolder each day she had to stay in the capitol. she gets more honest in front of the cameras. she makes more friends in training, and not the ones wilbur recommends. she throws barbs at him every time he makes one of those callous, cold-hearted comments about other tributes and rankings and odds. and besides, she's going in the arena this time, not him. she needs to practice her bravery.

it's like... she hasn't given up on him. she thinks the old wilbur is in there somewhere. (she is wrong. that is not how trauma works.) but she won't hold her tongue just because she

for extra angst points could definitely play up the whole 'feeling abandoned' angle between them as niki goes into the arena - probably due to how fraught their friendship gets leading up to the games. niki wants to focus on them and their friendship, wilbur has stringently cut off (almost) everything from 12 and refuses to let her in; he tells her to behave for the cameras, she tells him she never will. i think the last point in that screenshot would also make for a super tasty argument where niki feels wilbur has gone astray, that he's abandoned 12, and that he'll probably do nothing but sit on his ass and watch her die and he can't even bring himself to care about her anymore, can he? just more fodder for the arena. and honestly, i think wilbur would passively agree with most of that - he values niki's opinion, after all, even now, and if she says he's rapidly descending into a lost cause then she must be right. and it's niki, so she will be fine, and he goes to his bedroom that night and tries to pretend he is sleeping perfectly fine instead of feeling paralysed with fear.

okay now onto the games - YES HE SO WOULD. or at least i think he would go out of his way to help. as for cheating - he's a recent victor for 12 and i think he would value tommy (no doubt a link to him... i think they'd be in touch in this au also) too much to risk the punishment falling onto him as well. i get the vibes this is a games closer to 74th than 10th, so there are far fewer opportunities to cheat and the consequences of getting caught are higher. but schmoozing up sponsors? making stupid ass radio interviews or whatever to talk up niki's odds? sharing anecdotes from their childhood - some real, some entirely fabricated - across capitol airwaves to stoke their sympathy? 100%. with less to lose in this au, i think niki would be far less inclined to play nice for the cameras - i hope you starve, she spits at one of them, and wilbur appears on a talkshow two days later as she scrambles for survival in the arena to talk up how she always saved loaves from the bakery for the poorest mothers and children in 12. he borrows and begs and swindles to the point where it feels like cheating. but hey, this new wilbur is capitol-branded. he knows how to play the game.

if anything he probably sinks into the game a little too much. self-preservation is not his forte. probably wracks up a few heavy debts and favours to owe, but those are not priority until niki is out of the arena, alive. as long as she wins, and as long as the family he has isn't in danger, he will manage. wow it would suck if at some point those two goals became impossible to co-achieve. anyway

i kind of see niki's victory in the arena being similar to the one in the main au - if only because planning out an entire games is hard for meee >-< . she walks in bolder and braver for sure, and with a less strategic pick of allies, but they all get picked off and she spends a few weeks so terrified she can barely sleep and then she ruptures some fuel line and sets the arena alight with a fire that burns brighter and more ravenously than it should. but she wins, and she's airlifted out of a filthy, muddy creek she had resigned herself to die in, and wilbur barges his way through as many peacekeepers so that he can actually see her with her burnt skin and hair and unfocused eyes and trust that what was on the screens wasn't a fluke, and that they made it. and then it's just a matter of surviving the after.

i'm sure there are some other random quirks or tidbits i can think of re: this take on a c!rainduo hunger games au but these are my base thoughts!!

#can i just say whatever the hell lucy grey n snow had going on in part 1 made me so berko btw. like congrats ur my means to an end youre my #symbol youre my buddy? should we kiss? i'll get you out of here / don't make me leave these people behind #BRIDGING OFF OF THE TBOSAS DISCUSSION. i think the thing with crainduo (or at least how i like to depict them) is that they care about each #other extremely deeply and value each other... without being each others number one priority at all times.#i don't think niki plays priority with people she cares for like that; see her relationships with like wilbur and eret in lmanberg #even her friendship with and offering ponk a place to stay in her city after manberg even tho manberg hurt her #as for wilbur: his priority is tommy. like always. if it was just him on the line he'd do anything to get niki thru but it's not #asks #hunger games au #they would truly be such a nightmare in this au like. wilbur's self loathing is SO HIGH due to survivors guilt and trauma and mental illnes #he thinks that niki is So Good and Has It Together meanwhile he is So Bad #and is a mess that she cannot possibly rely on him. she can't possibly need him. she can't possibly want him around #<- and this shit is INGRAINED like. it's not even an active thought pattern anymore it is carved into his brain like a groove #and so shes like. do you even care whether i live or die??#of course he does. but this is the capitol. he cant be vulnerable in a way that matters #and that alienates niki further and this rage and heartbreak is building in her with nowhere to go. and in the arena she thinks it erupts #nah uh. i think its AFTER the area when she has to face wilbur again that she would go full screaming meltdown #ANYWAY !! i really like aus where they have this friction esp because i think like.. idk i think sometimes our views of rainduo are too ros #wilbur kind of forgets about niki sometimes because his self hatred is that bad. niki doesnt get wilburs mental illness and takes it both a #a burden/blame AND a direct rejection of her and her friendship #and they hover just outside of each others spaces anxious and angry and almost self flagellating. GOOD FOR THEM !#anyway Yes this did unlock something within me. thanks anon feel free to add on if u had more thoughts esp re: tbosas and such bc i had suc #a good time watching that movie

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