#that was the last in my ask box pls send more guys!!

[bunnybubae]

(M)🚦Red Light: The Allure | Ch3 [JJK]

👉🏻[Series Masterpost]

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader (GymOwner!JK/MotoRacer!JK/Biker!JK-TattoArtist!OC)

Genre: S2L - Smut - Fluff - Angst

Summary: Jeon Jungkook never lets any distraction take him away from his motorcycle or his gym for more than one night. He just wants to speed around the track and feel the adrenaline rushing through his veins, the sex he gets thanks to his charm, is just a side dish to his life. A tough past brought him on that Ducati that he learned to love, a past  you’ll uncover, as you slowly seep in under his skin. It’s a hell of a ride, in all senses, as you try to escape your own hell in the meanwhile.  Where will this ride bring you? Will it be worth it in the end?

Chapter Warnings: mention of the toxic ex (again, unfortunately), still a lot of teasing and heavy flirting, JK in black CK undies yes, it is a warning, brief mention of weed,  alcohol consumption, brief thigh riding, rubbing in public environment, dry humping, oral sex (M/F receiving), praise kink, protected sex, one (1) slap on the ass, rough sex.

Wc: 11.7k

A/N: Hello there! I hope you guys still want to read this story, cause CH3 is finally out! As always, I'm sorry if there are some grammatical mistakes, english isn't my first language and I don't have a beta, so pls bear with me! 🫶🏻 Let me know what are your thoughts about the story, my box is always open! - Joy 🐰

December 8th, Friday

You're glad it didn't pour down all day.

The night sky is clear and the smell of rain permeates in the air. You look through the car window covered in droplets as Hani chats with the driver.

You're too busy looking at scattered puddles on the asphalt reflecting the surrounding lights to pay attention to whatever the uber driver is saying.

The only thing troubling your mind right now is the last message you received. You had already blocked Ray's number a long time ago, but no one else would ever dream of sending you a similar message. The scumbag must have changed it.

You check your phone screen once again, almost hopeful that the content of the message is now different or even better, gone.

Unknown Number:- Have fun tn.

You tighten the coat you're wearing around your figure, as if that would be enough to make you feel safe.

Three words were enough to disgust you to the core. Well done Ray.

His intent is clear: he hopes to ruin your evening with this message, he wants you to feel out of place and you know pretty well that behind those seemingly innocent words there is much more hidden. His passive aggressive stalking exudes from every pixel of the screen. 

You wonder how he knows your plans for the evening, you hoped he had finally stopped spying on you, but clearly, this dude is unweary.

A hand suddenly rests on your shoulder, drawing your attention and making you flinch at the unexpected contact. Your thoughts must have poisoned your features judging by Hani's tone of voice, gentle and concerned.

“Y/N, are you okay?”

You mechanically put your phone back in your pocket and look at her with a hint of a smile, hoping that she doesn't notice the tornado of thoughts that swirl behind your eyes.

You don't want your worries to ruin your evening, that's exactly what that asshole would want.

Much less, you want Hani to decide it's best to take you home. It would be a defeat on all fronts.

You're going to go to this damn party and have fun. Ray has no power over you, not anymore. To let this message get under your skin would mean allowing him to manipulate you once again. You have to use it instead to do the exact opposite, to free yourself tonight and allow your wounded soul to dance.

Your face softens a little more as you manage to regain control of your thoughts.

"Yeah, it's all good. How long will it take to get there?"

Hani tells you that you'll arrive in a few minutes. She doesn't seem entirely convinced by your attempt to reassure her but you're glad she doesn't ask anything more when you start a barrage of questions about this kind of parties and the moto races.

Tae and Jungkook are waiting for you inside, she says, apparently they had to deal with some organizational issues related to tomorrow's qualifications, that's why they went earlier.

Hani is particularly thrilled, you can tell by the way she describes in as much detail as possible all the competitions and parties she's already attended. A little of her enthusiasm makes its way through you and you find yourself smiling genuinely as you listen to her.

A few minutes later, your driver parks next to the curb and once you get out of the car, you are amazed to notice the huge group of motorbikes parked in the lot next to the venue.

They're all well parked, resting under the light of the street lamps which highlights all their beautiful colors and shapes.

You reach the entrance guarded by a guy who looks like he could fold a motorbike in two. His menacing presence actually calms you further. You sigh without realizing it as your chest feels a little lighter.

Hani greets the big boy, who reciprocates, while maintaining a serious demeanor. He lets you in without even asking for documents or such, Hani is really well known by now.

The interior of the place has been well decorated for the occasion and the music is not excessively loud, the atmosphere is pleasant. You were expecting something more frenetic considering the adrenaline that motorcyclists are used to, everyone seems to be having fun but with ease instead. Which doesn't bother you at all.

Hani leads you to a small room filled with some sort of lockers to take off your coat before you could finally start your night.

It doesn't take long to find Tae, sitting at the bar, right next to the dance floor.

As you get closer, you notice that he's with a dark-haired guy and that they both seem deep in conversation.

"Here you are finally! Hoseok, Y/N, Y/N, Hoseok"

Tae gestures with his hands between you and the guy next to him. 

"You can call me Hobi!"

He says with a beautiful smile and holding out his hand.

The handshake was a bit embarrassing for you, you're no longer used to this type of introduction. Usually, the customers who come to the shop know you through Instagram or through friends, and it is easier to establish relationships which, in that circumstance, are limited to work.

"Nice to meet you, Hobi."

Tae offers everyone a round and the alcohol seems to loosen your nerves a little more.

Despite the initial awkwardness, the conversation between the four of you continues smoothly. You laugh out loud when Hobi tells an anecdote about Tae and Jungkook, you find him funny, both his way of storytelling and the emphasis he puts on details. He is definitely a sunny and extroverted guy who is able to drag anyone into conversation and put a smile on their face with his energetic ways.

Speaking of Jungkook,  you wonder where he could be, considering he was not here with them when you arrived.

Hobi continues his tell tales while Hani chuckles and Tae intervenes every now and then

"That guy over there," Hobi points behind you, "That one over there has been the champion for two years in a row!"

You turn to see where his finger is pointing only to realize that the champion he's talking about is Jungkook himself.

Tae laughs mockingly, determined to annoy you today as well, clearly. "Oh, they know each other very well!" and he exaggerates a wink.

Luckily enough, Hani seems to be on your side tonight. She elbows him on the side to shut him up but that only elicits a half-laugh from Tae.

"Yes, because I joined his gym." You respond casually, purposely ignoring Tae's innuendos.

Hobi starts waving his arm in the air trying to get Jungkook's attention from across the room.

Jungkook is talking to a couple of people, you look at him as he smiles and nods at something his interlocutors said, then he notices Hobi's attempts to call him.

He waves back and seems to want to return to the conversation with whoever is in front of him, when he notices you next to his friends.

A small smile forms on his face and his gaze remains fixed on you, almost as if he were challenging you to a staring contest. 

You decide to playfully stick your tongue out at him to which he, in response, reacts with a damn wink.

You turn around and try to douse the heat you feel by taking a large sip of your drink. The alcohol helps, but the warmth in your cheeks becomes noticeable.

Your friends continue to chat peacefully, you're relieved to see that no one has noticed this little exchange with Jungkook, with the exception of Hani of course, her smile speaks clearly.

You try to focus on Tae and Hobi's talk, but they're talking about some modifications their mechanics made to their bikes for the race, details too mechanical for your alcohol-clouded mind.

Hani's smile is different now when you look at her, and the tilt of her head confuses you further.

"Here he is, the champion graces us with his presence!"

Hobi says all of a sudden.

You realize that Hani was trying to let you know that Jungkook was on his way.

He stops next to you and it's strange to meet him in a context other than the gym. You felt more or less the same feeling when he gave you that lift that evening, but now you have the opportunity to see another aspect of his person and the way he is dressed is proof of that.

Jungkook seems like an outgoing and sociable guy when it comes to training his members at the gym. As you watch him now though, he seems slightly embarrassed, keeping his hands inside the pockets of his baggy jeans.

Tae takes Jungkook's arm as he responds to Hobi's statement "Technically, I'm not the champion yet."

“Will you let us win any races this year?” Tae asks in a teasing tone.

Jungkook tries to free himself from Tae's grip by pinching his side. "Ouch." Tae chuckles, placing a hand on the pinched spot, while Jungkook rearranges his hair, moving it away from his face.

"It's not my fault that Ducky is the fastest bike on the track."

"Ducky?"

You ask out of curiosity, before you even realize.

Tae and Hobi start giggling in the background as Jungkook's gaze falls on you. He appears surprised by the question, as if he thought you knew. Then, he seems to remember that he never spoke about his bike nor his races with you and his expression changes.

"My Ducati." he replies, playing with his piercing, a habit you think comes when he's pondering or embarrassed.

"Did you give your bike a name?"

Jungkook tells you that many people give their bikes a nickname, explaining that the reason he chose Ducky it's due to the similar sound with Ducati.

You smile in recognition that Jungkook definitely looks like an intimidating and strong guy, but that you became aware of a more thoughtful and playful part of him starting from the night he brought you home on his motorbike. Even this small detail about the moto's name fits perfectly with the Jungkook that you got to know till now.

An interesting mix that is also reflected in the ducati he rides.

“It's cute, I think it suits her!” You chuckle softly.

You notice something in Jungkook's eyes, but it doesn't last long due to Tae's comment.

"No please, don't tell me that you also think it's a suitable name for a motorbike!"

Tae babbles distraught, while Hobi laughs loudly, shaking his head.

"Look who's talkin, the one who called his bike Sonic!"

Jungkook huffs mockingly, rolling his eyes. 

The bickering that takes place in front of you makes you laugh lightly, Hani and Hobi join you as Tae fiercely retorts.

"At least it's related! And it's blue like Sonic! Your bike is not even yellow!"

“Wow bro, so original!”

Jungkook pretends to be overly impressed by his friend's explanation. Tae gulps down the last sip of beer while he wraps his arm around Hani.

"And by the way, have you ever seen a duck run? Those tiny little things are pretty fast!" Jungkook concludes.

At this, even Tae bursts out laughing, almost spitting out the beer from his nose. Everyone has seen at least once in their lifetime a video about little ducks chasing their mother or caregiver. Jungkook evidently emerges victorious from the argument, he chuckles along with all of you and the moment couldn't be more wholesome than this, you think.

The evening unfolds like this, next to the bar, with laughter and some small bickering between the three guys. You notice from time to time that Jungkook's eyes wander towards you while he speaks and he catches you looking at him sometimes as well.

The alcohol in your system definitely doesn't help make it any less evident.

"Another round? It's on me this time." Hobi shakes his empty beer, starting to move towards the bar when Jungkook stops him by placing a hand on his shoulder

"Just a coke for me, please."

Hobi nods as he appears to reply something like, "I know" before smiling tight-lipped at him.

You watch Jungkook's profile the entire time as he smiles back at Hobi before letting him walk towards the bar.

He looks like one of those smiles that takes over his lips when you catch his mind wandering, back at the gym.

A light smile that seems to hide something more.

When Jungkook turns back to bring his attention back to the conversation in progress, your eyes meet for the umpteenth time and his weak smile widens into a smirk.

He leans towards you slightly, while Tae and Hani continue to discuss something you don't quite listen to and his face gets dangerously close to yours.

“Are you going to keep looking at me all night?”

Jungkook speaks close to your ear, he doesn't whisper but he still makes sure you're the only one to hear him.

The sudden closeness of his body allows your nostrils to immediately capture his scent, the one you've had on you thanks to his motorcycle jacket and as the memory of that evening returns to your slightly alcohol-influenced mind, you smile mischievously.

“How can you say I'm looking at you all the time?”

Jungkook shifts his head slightly so he can look at you better as he says

"Because every time I look at you your eyes are already looking at me,"

You sigh, his voice far too calm to cause such turmoil within you. You try to ignore his usual attempt to make you blush, failing miserably when he continues, “You look like you want something.”

This man right here, damn. He knows, you know he knows the effect he has on you. It's clear.

You feel hotter but you manage to retort.

"And what about you? Why are you looking at me so often?"

The liquid courage you have in your body is enough to make you ask straight away, basking in the feeling of his body so close to yours.

Jungkook's eyes watch you intently and a gleam of amusement adorns his deep irises.

He moistens his lips and the movement of his tongue doesn't escape your gaze, but right as he is about to answer your question, Hobi returns, but empty-handed.

“Sorry guys,” Hobi interjects, his face darkened with worry compared to earlier. "Some problem came up with the registration documents and they asked me to help check." He says hastily as he apologizes once again.

Tae offers to go with him and solve the problem at hand but Hobi shakes his head,

"There is no need, I don't want you to ruin your night with bureaucratic bullshit. See you on the track tomorrow! It was nice meeting you Y/N!

"Pleasure is mine Hobi!"

You reply, giving him a smile.

As you watch him go, you realize that you have just met this boy, and yet you feel that you have made the acquaintance of a genuinely beautiful person.

It's so rare nowadays.

“So guys,” Hani exclaims loudly, catching everyone's attention.

"Tae and I are planning a relaxing ride next Sunday."

Jungkook nods.

"Where were you guys thinking of going?"

You watch your friends discuss the details of the itinerary and realize that you're actually considered part of the trip only when you notice that at the idea of the four of you going on a ride together, Jungkook seems relaxed, almost as if it were obvious to take you around on his beloved Ducky. Maybe your mind is wandering a little too much, but it makes you blush a little.

“It can be done, as long as Y/N agrees.”

The pronunciation of your name draws your attention, refocusing you on the group.

"Mh?

"I said if you feel like getting the necessary moto gear, we can go."

Jungkook repeats, Hani and Tae are looking at you as you try to seriously focus on organizing the aforementioned ride.

"Yes, no problem, but I don't know where to buy what I need."

"I'll take you to the store where I bought mine!"

Hani exclaims with a smile.

“I can get you some gloves but as far as helmet and jacket, make sure you get stuff that's the right size for you.”

You shake your head, saying that you will take care of getting everything you need with Hani.

"Oh, yeah I forgot how small your hands are, it's definitely better if you try them on at the store."

Jungkook evidently can never stop himself from teasing you.

His comment causes a mischievous smile on Tae's face and a very satisfied one on Jungkook's.

Hani purses her lips, trying to hold back a laugh, or whatever she was about to say.

Your eyes roll in mock annoyance as you playfully push Jungkook.

"Okay, it's decided then!"

States Hani, who sports a satisfied smile as she continues, “Oh, I forgot something in the car! Come on Tae.”

She grabs Tae's hand and before you can even point it out, he anticipates you by saying, "But you came in an Uber!"

Hani glares at him, "Just come."

Jungkook laughs, shaking his head at the obvious attempt to leave you two alone, while you watch them go in disbelief and slight embarrassment. You want to curse her, but you know it's what you really want too. You want time alone with him, you want to take advantage of the courage you feel inside this evening to understand a little more this tattooed and lip-pierced mystery.

The dance floor is full and you can no longer see the bartender behind the bar due to how many people are waiting to receive their drinks.

You don't even remember the last time you attended a party like this, the only thing that comes to mind when you think about it is Ray almost causing a fight with a guy who mistook you for his friend, the fight that came of it once you left the party and the tears you shed because of his sharp words, is the only memory of that last party you attended.

You return your gaze to Jungkook as anger and sadness from past events threaten to make their way onto your face.

There is no need to dwell on the past, past parties are in the past, Ray is not here and nothing stops you from enjoying the evening and putting off your worries about your ex and his passive aggressive messages until tomorrow.

Jungkook watches the dancing crowd, moving his head to the beat of the music as he's leaning against the wall.

You admire him so much, he always seems to have everything under control, no matter the shadow that darkens his face every now and then, he seems to always manage to return to reality and enjoy the little things.

"Want to dance?" You don't give your shyness time to reconsider the invitation that the words have already left your mouth. You hold out your hand as you invite him to join you. 

He looks at your hand briefly before replying with a soft smile, “Why not.” and join his hand to yours.

You clasp your hand around his and lead him through the crowd.

You feel boldness fill you, you hadn't even considered the possibility that he might refuse and happy that he didn't, you reach a spot that isn't too crowded, the volume of the music is louder here and you feel the effect on your skin as your heart follows its own rhythm.

Thanks to what you drank and the need to let yourself go at least for tonight, you let your body feel the music.

His movements are loose and yours adapt to his almost immediately. Jungkook watches you the entire time, paying attention to every movement of your body, as if he wants to imprint them in his mind for later.

When you look up and meet his gaze, this time you hold it, smiling mischievously before turning your back on him.

You continue to dance filled with a wave of audacity, your every movement is seductive for him, who can't take his eyes off of you.

The line of your back is far too attractive to keep at a distance so, all of a sudden, you feel Jungkook's body move closer to yours.

The closeness causes a leap in your chest, but what he says is the cause of the heightened blush on your face.

You feel like your cheeks are perpetually burning because of him.

"What happened to the super shy girl who showed up at the gym a while ago?"

His voice is almost a whisper as you feel his face close to your ear.

You tilt your head back, resting it on his shoulder before answering confidently.

"She has learned to dare more." and with that, you decide to lean against his body completely.

Fuck shyness, fuck fears and comfort zones. If tomorrow you have to deal with the consequences of Ray's reappearance, you want to enjoy this one night to the fullest.

You hear Jungkook chuckle softly as a tentative hand finds its place on your hip.

He caresses you flat and softly from your hip up, his palm just grazing the edge of your bra as you wonder what it might be like without your clothes in between.

"It's clear that you're not that shy tonight, either."

You retort as you roll your hips against his. You feel his hand get slightly heavier on your hip as he presses you gently until your body is completely attached to his.

His other hand reaches for your shoulder and brushes your hair away to reveal your neck.

The gesture causes heat in your lower abdomen, you swallow unconsciously at the unexpected reaction of your body. Maybe it's been too long since someone touched you like this or maybe it's the power that Jeon Jungkook has over your body now, but you feel that at this rate you run the risk of melting in his arms.

“What makes you say that, princess?”

His breath tickles you as he whispers the words directly into your skin. His lips don't even touch you once and you wish they would.

You push your hips against his a little more as you continue to move languidly. His fingers mindlessly caress the curve of your neck and you close your eyes as you enjoy the feeling.

“The way you're touching me now.”

You reply in a small voice as your hand reaches for the one resting on your hip,

you hold it as if it might disappear if you don't.

You shiver slightly when his hot breath teases the thin skin of your exposed neck again and the grip of his hand under yours grows more and more.

“I can do more and better, wouldn't you like that?”

You feel the effect of your movements directly against your butt and it gives you even more confidence.

You feel completely intoxicated by his touch, nothing to do with the alcohol that undoubtedly contributed to you finding yourself in this situation, everything you are feeling now is the work of his touch, of his body against yours and of his words.

You're dying to fuck him, to feel his hands all over your naked body as he whispers dirty things in your ear. But at the same time you don't want this to ruin your friendship, you don't want there to be misunderstandings between you. You can always enjoy the pleasures of sex without unnecessary feelings being involved, right?

You don't feel ready yet and you hope Jungkook is of the same opinion as you, that he also wants to have sex with you without strings attached.

You spin around and your hands rest on his broad shoulders. You look at him for a moment, his eyes dark and full of longing as you whisper in his ear, "As long as it's the only thing you want too."

When you look back at him to decipher his reaction, you notice that Jungkook initially seems surprised by your statement, then a pleased smile forms on his plump lips and his hands suddenly become bolder, moving down from your hips to the small of your back. You barely hold back a moan when you feel the hardness of his member and the firmness of his hands on you.

Jungkook holds you close and you don't know when exactly your bodies stopped following the rhythm of the music. He firmly squeezes one of your buttock while you caress the locks of his nape.

You watch him move closer to your neck once again and this time, you feel his wet lips brush against you just below your ear.

"Are you really the first girl I don't have to give the usual speech to? Am I dreaming?"

His deep voice reaches the parts of your body that you never thought would be affected by a simple voice.

"What speech?" You sigh when you feel his hands move up your back.

"The one that makes my intentions clear."

Jungkook looks back at you, as if wanting to make sure he hasn't misunderstood anything.

"It seems we want the same thing, then."

You state in a rush, feeling the places he touches completely on fire.

"Do we?"

Jungkook tilts his head slightly as he holds you impossibly tighter. You feel completely enveloped by the warmth of his body when his thigh slides and finds its place between your legs.

A soft moan escapes your lips and it seems to trigger something in him, you hear him breathe deeply before asking in a low voice.

“What do you want, Y/N?”

From the tone of his voice it is clear that he knows what you want, he simply wants you to confess it freely.

His thigh twitches between your legs, rubbing just right against the place you want it the most.

You follow its movements, completely enraptured by the sensations you are experiencing.

There is no room for shame right now in your mind clouded by the burning desire for him.

The only thing you can think about is his leg repeatedly teasing your clit and the caresses of his hands along your back.

Your hands tremble slightly with pleasure as they involuntarily grasp the strands falling at the nape of his neck.

Jungkook hisses through his teeth but doesn't resist, in fact he seems to like this little gesture from you.

You look at him for a moment and his adam's apple is so inviting that you can't resist the temptation.

You move his head to the side to get more access and lick the surface up to his jaw.

You would continue to enjoy this lewd moment as long as it lasted.

You thought you would tease each other for a while and then go back to your friends, but no.

Jungkook is just as involved as you are.

The groan that vibrates in his throat reached a part of your brain that is now completely short-circuited.

"I want to fuck you."

The words come out with frightening ease and are enough to make Jungkook look back at you through lidded eyes.

“And I don't want anything more than that.”

You know you're not ready to take that leap, but the uncertainty hidden in your voice reaches somewhere in your chest.

It hurts something when you watch him smile widely at your latest statement.

A fleeting pain, overtaken by the strong desire caused by the hardness of his member, throbbing against your thigh.

“Yeah, we definitely want the exact same thing.”

It was already quite clear, but hearing you say it is something else.

Jungkook moves away from you, leaving your body to the cold void his hands left. 

Then, he grabs your hand, leading you past the crowd and towards the other side of the place.

You look around, convinced he wants to take you to the bathrooms, but you realize that with every step you take, you are getting closer to the locker's room.

"Where are we going?"

You ask loudly, as Jungkook continues his zig zag through the people holding your hand.

"At my place." he answers.

“I thought you wanted to do it in the bathroom, haven't you been drinking?”

You know that driving under the influence of alcohol is a terrible idea.

Jungkook stops in his tracks for a moment noticing your hesitation in continuing and you hear him chuckle before answering.

"I shared a joint before," he looks into your eyes, as you inspect them, "And then, you saw me drinking a cola, I don't drink alcohol."

Jungkook continues to look at you, though his eyes avoid yours now, lingering on your lips.

You want to ask him more but before you can, he leans in close to you to whisper, making your legs tremble in anticipation.

“Besides, why would I take you to a public bathroom when I can make you scream in the comfort of my own bed?”

He knows all too well that he has the upper hand and is taking advantage of it.

Damn Jeon Jungkook and the effect he has on you.

The heat spreads again in your belly and when you look at him you just want to bite that plump lip, tease his piercing and let that mocking smile get lost in moans of pleasure.

“Or maybe you feel more comfortable doing it at yours?”

His tone of voice lacks malice this time, after all, you have now understood that Jungkook is a caring person and therefore he wants to avoid making you feel uncomfortable.

You nod and smile at his consideration.

"At mine."

Jungkook tightens his hand around yours again, smirking.

You quickly reach the exit after collecting your things from the lockers.

And there she is, Ducky.

You will climb on her for the second time, soon there will even be a third, you can't help but smile at the thought.

Strange how different reasons are leading you to get on a motorbike so often, not that this is a complaint, far from it.

You tremble at the thought of experiencing certain sensations once again, this time even, with the prospect of sleeping with Jungkook.

He invites you to wear his gear once again, but you strenuously refuse to deprive him of his jacket this time. Even though he was annoyed at first, Jungkook had to give in to your determination.

December cold is unforgiving.

In order to compromise, you wear his helmet, unable to argue with its importance.

You reach your apartment complex after a while, Jungkook was driving the entire time at a speed well under the legal limit, allowing you to hug his body to shield yourself from the cold as much as possible.

Once you reach the building's underground parking lot, you get off Ducky and take off the helmet to hand it to him. You smile brightly and hear Jungkook chuckle to himself as he shakes his head.

"You really like to ride, huh?"

You look at him while he's fixing his disheveled hair and it's a vision that you didn't think could affect you so much.

You think Jungkook would look sexy even wearing a battered potato sack, but seeing him in these clothes, you think, will always turn you on.

“Oh trust me, I love riding Ducky, but I can't wait to ride you.”

You haven't felt this lustful for someone in a while.

Surely the drinks you had before are not supporting you to keep certain thoughts to yourself.

Jungkook sighs visibly impressed by your bluntness and you could swear you heard him curse.

"Can't wait for you to show me."

Seeing Jungkook now, in the flesh, inside your apartment is something.

You watch as he places his helmet near the entrance door and places his jacket on top of it before taking off his shoes.

As you do the same, taking off your coat and shoes to put them away, he looks around, taking in the appearance of your apartment. 

The foyer is small but well arranged, with a large mirror and a shoe rack right beside it.

You lead the way to reach your couch in the living room and as you walk, his eyes land on some of your latest sketches scattered around on a counter, one of it appears to be a pair of boxing gloves and he finds himself chuckling like an idiot.

As you do the same, taking off your coat and shoes to put them away, he looks around, taking in the appearance of your apartment. 

The foyer is small but well arranged, with a large mirror and a shoe rack right beside it and the little hallway that connects your entrance to your living area is decorated with pictures, plants and some of your favorite sketches.

You lead the way to reach your couch in the living room and as he walks behind you, his eyes land on some of your latest sketches scattered around on the counter of your kitchen, one of it appears to be a pair of boxing gloves and he finds himself chuckling like an idiot.

"Why are you laughing?"

You're puzzled by his sudden reaction. 

"I like your apartment, it fits your vibe."

He answers quietly and you smile shyly in appreciation, suggesting him to make himself comfortable on the couch.

"Want something to drink?

 You ask him, walking behind the counter to reach your fridge.

"Just water, thanks." 

He replies as he sits comfortably. You get some fresh water and when you get back you offer him the glass.

Jungkook sips from it and you join him on the couch.

Your heart always beats so fast in his presence that by now you're almost getting used to the constant hustle and bustle in your chest.

"You really don't like alcohol."

You say lightheartedly as you gather your legs up on the couch and turn to face him.

You curse your damn mouth when you realize that your comment made Jungkook tense up.

You just wanted to make him feel comfortable but before you can think of something to recover, Jungkook takes another sip of water before replying in a low voice.

"Yeah. I prefer weed, even though I rarely smoke anymore."

His eyes look at you for a brief moment, dark as pitch or a moonless sky.

They then move to the coffee table in front of you to put the glass down.

"I'd say you don't need it anyway. You don't need it to boost your confidence, like me."

Something moves in his eyes when you say this. His hand on your thigh pulls your attention away.

You watch it as it lays on your thigh softly. 

The tone of his voice, his firm aversion to alcohol and his troubled eyes makes you ponder, but you can't formulate any sentence that doesn't risk making him even more gloomy.

Jungkook taught you many things in the gym, undoubtedly to throw good punches, but also to have courage in general, to dare and not to let fears stop you.

He was able to free that part of you that you have always adored, the one that made you achieve your most ambitious goals, despite having to sacrifice a healthy relationship with your family.

And he was able to get you there, easily, without even having to tell you openly what to do.

Despite his tacit support helped you regain a little confidence, you feel like he doesn't need the same. Like he needs you to voice your thoughts with him, even if it's not always as easy as after a few drinks on your system. 

You've always sensed that something keeps him anchored to a remote island in the back of his mind and you don't want him to take refuge there right now.

"You are right,"

Your voice is sweet, it matches his from earlier and with one movement you lift yourself, moving one leg to take it beyond his.

You sit on his thighs and place your hands gently on his shoulders.

Jungkook looks at you smugly and pleasantly surprised and you're happy to notice that island receding in the mirror of his eyes.

They slowly fill with lust for you, as they observe your body so close to his.

“Even though I drank a little, I'm sober enough to say that everything I did tonight, I've always wanted to do.”

Jungkook feels the weight of your body and the weight of your words right on his.

You're sitting directly on his growing member and his hands find their place on your hips as he pulls you closer.

“Wait until you see what I've always wanted to do to you.”

With that, his mouth takes over your neck.

He tastes your skin like he's finally testing a drop of water after a walk in the desert and you're the only source he wants to put his mouth on.

You moan as you tilt your head to let him taste you as he pleases.

Jungkook takes the opportunity to bite you a little, leaving a small blush on your skin and licking it to soothe the stinging spot.

You try to control yourself as his hands venture up your back.

“You have a condom on you?” You whisper all of a sudden.

Jungkook keeps kissing your neck, hesitantly moving one hand from your body only to pull a condom out of his back pocket.

He hands it to you and then grabs the hem of your sweater, stopping his assault to help you take it off. A shiver runs up your spine, realizing you're now in your bra in front of him, the cool air of the room brushes against your hot skin and his hands promptly return to your hips and back.

You squeeze the little silver package between your fingers as he pulls your body against him, your hips move almost automatically as you feel his member getting harder and harder. And in return you get wetter and wetter.

You're a complete mess in his arms as you buck your hips, panting slightly at every movement.

When his hands press you more against him, a loud moan leaves your lips and with it, the last bit of restraint you had.

You grab the hem of his sweatshirt, urgently undressing him.

"Someone is impatient." He chuckles breathlessly as he lets you undress him.

"Your fault." You reply as you move to undo his jeans.

"Yeah? And what are you gonna do about it?"

The aroused expression on your face is something he hopes to keep in mind for as long as possible.

You drop down to help him take off his jeans completely and Jungkook remains in his black Calvin Klein briefs. The outline of his hard member held with difficulty in the confines of the fabric, making you salivate at its sight.

You stand up and take the opportunity to remove your pants in front of him, while his gaze is glued to you.

If his eyes could touch, you would feel their stroke everywhere right now, like a dry brush on a virgin canvas.

They eagerly study every single curve, every movement you do is carefully followed as you reveal your panties and legs to him.

“You're so hot Y/N…”

You hear him breathing heavily and only after adding your pants to the pile of clothes do you turn back to look him in the eyes.

He's touching himself through his underwear at the sight of your body and despite everything that already happened, you're still blushing.

You are engulfed in the flames of pleasure, yet the blush on your cheeks is caused by something deeper.

You ignore this thought immediately, setting aside that thing that tries to push to make itself some space and focus on the need that screams between your legs instead.

You climb on top of him again, leaning on his shoulders.

"Jungkook,"

You whisper in his ear, looking him in the eyes right now would mean exposing yourself too much, paradoxically.

What a strange contradiction though.

You're already almost completely naked in front of him, but the idea of letting him look you in the eyes while you say the next words makes you feel too vulnerable.

"If we do this, I want us to agree on a few things."

As you try to regain your courage, you lick his neck, moving down towards his collarbone to reach his pectorals.

"I'm listening."

He sighs as he lets his head go back, as if wanting to give you total access to him, basking in the feelings your tongue is giving.

Jungkook is completely engrossed, he seems to enjoy every little thing without thinking too much while you're struggling to let yourself go completely.

The friendship that has developed between you over these months is something you care about and you wouldn't want to ruin it for simple sex.

Even if you're dying to enjoy these moments you've been craving, you're afraid of ruining everything.

"We're just friends who are going to fuck, right?"

You ask tentatively as you continue to leave a trail of saliva with your tongue and lips across his toned chest.

"No awkwardness after."

You're not sure why you're saying this when you can't even look him in the eyes right now, but at the same time you're saying it precisely to not let your fear stop you.

Maybe you're just trying to convince yourself that nothing will change and that you can let yourself go, or just to make sure you both are still on the same page, but Jungkook doesn't seem to notice your inner conflict right now, too distracted by your ministrations probably.

"This is not going to ruin our friendship if that's what you're worried about."

He states between breaths as he wraps a hand in the middle of your hair.

“The fact that we both know what we want from each other and what we don't, won't cause any problems, don't you think?”

He pulls your hair slightly to expose your neck, and you close your eyes unconsciously when you feel his lips on your skin once again.

"No awkwardness after."

His whisper makes you shiver with pleasure and almost as if you needed to have this confirmation from him, you open your eyes and move to finally be able to lower his underwear.

His penis rises free from the confines and you are a little surprised at the size. He throbs in front of you with the tip red and moist as you observe the succulent veins adorning its surface.

"So we're gonna be ride buddies and friends who fucked once."

Jungkook holds his legs open as you get on your knees in front of him to pull his briefs completely off.

"Let's see if you still want it to be once after I fuck you just right."

You smile sensing Jungkook's usual way of doing things, his classic way of provoking you while he smiles with confidence.

"Bold are we?"

You snicker as you pump your little fist around his shaft a couple of times.

He hisses.

"You've got the lead for now, wait and see when it's my turn."

He says through gritted teeth as he clearly tries not to give in to your touch too shamefully.

"We'll see."

You move closer, gently placing your lips on the side of his cock as you continue to move your hand slowly.

The intense teasing served to make him super responsive.

Jungkook squirms a little when you carefully spread his precum on the sensitive tip.

You hear as he tries to limit his sounds.

You look up momentarily when your mouth finally settles around his moistened tip, only to see his reaction.

Jungkook instinctively brings his head back and his mouth opens in a silent moan of pleasure.

He sighs heavily as his hands grip the fabric of the couch he's sitting on.

The vision of his naked body exposed to your will causes a shiver down your spine and with your free hand you move down until you reach the most sensitive part of your body.

You give yourself pleasure as you move your mouth and hand finding a rhythm that could be pleasant for him.

You listen carefully for any reaction that might let you know that you are doing the right thing as you keep your eyes closed, completely letting yourself go to the small sounds he makes.

When you twist your wrist slightly and let go of his cock with a pop to catch your breath, Jungkook lets out a throaty moan and he is breathing noticeably faster now.

You're so wet now that you think he could fit inside you without too much effort, you continue to tease your clit while jerking him off at the same speed.

You leave a trail of little kisses along his member, from the tip to the balls.

You look at him again and unexpectedly meet his gaze.

You feel your confidence waver for the briefest of moments when you notice his eyes looking at you intently.

His pierced lip is caught between his teeth as he breathes deeply through his nose.

He's trying in every way possible to block any sound that might come from his mouth and it's almost annoying to notice the effort he puts into it.

"Let me hear."

You say softly between small kisses.

“I want to know if I'm doing well or not.”

You tickle with your wet tongue from bottom to top, once again reaching the sensitive tip.

His cock throbs in your hand and you smirk satisfied.

You don't need to hear his moans to know that he's completely into it, but you still want to hear them because of you, it's almost a visceral need at this point.

"You're doing great,"

He responds in a deep voice.

He moves the hair that has fallen in front of your eyes with a finger as he tries to steady his breathing.

A soft gesture that makes your heart skip a beat, but you keep your focus on your movements.

Your hands continue to move in unison as you moan, kissing and licking his cock. You purposely avoid taking him fully into your mouth, teasing him every now and then when you feel the sounds getting stuck in his throat.

You feel pervaded by the power that these circumstances can give.

Jungkook watches you the whole time as you work on him and yourself.

He evidently noticed the effect his words had on you, his little praise gave you more confidence, allowing you to let go a little more.

Jungkook suddenly stops you by placing a hand on your shoulder just when you thought he was enjoying it a lot, or at least it seemed like that from his persistent and muffled groaning.

“Y/N, let me taste you please..”

You hear the desperation in his voice and you can see it in his face when you lean up to look at him, a little bit of saliva wetting your chin.

His eyes are completely dark, full of the longing that you know he can see in your eyes too.

He moves to stand up, forcing you back onto your feet before picking you up.

You yelp at the sudden motion, holding onto his neck for support as he helps you wrap your legs around his hips.

“Where is your bedroom?”

Jungkook asks as he latches onto your already battered neck.

"Down the hallway, second door on the right."

In no time, Jungkook transports you following your directions. He pushes the door open with his foot before entering and letting you lie on your soft bed.

He watches you bounce once on it, then looks you up and down with an unreadable look.

Being in your apartment, on your bed, almost completely naked in front of him, definitely makes you bolder, feeling more comfortable.

You just realized how far you've gone with him, that you can't go back now.

Not that you want to, honestly.

You observe him, majestic in front of you, the faint glow of the moon that leaks into the room illuminates his skin deliciously, accentuating every muscle of his toned body.

Your eyes do their best to capture every detail and imprint it in your memory.

Jungkook bends over you, caging your legs with his powerful arms.

You remain propped up on your forearms as your breathing becomes increasingly labored.

His hands rest at your sides and with a firm but delicate movement, he pulls you towards him.

He bends down to let his tongue leave a wet trail across your belly, to the edge of your panties.

The passage of his mouth so close to your core, feeds the fire in your belly.

"Can I?"

He asks softly as his thumbs hook your panties on both sides.

He looks at you, patiently waiting for your permission.

Or your refusal.

You see a hint of hesitation in his gaze, as if he doesn't want to go any further against your will.

You can feel this small detail slowly infiltrating under your skin. You feel it brings to the light something that you would have preferred to remain in the dark, especially in this moment.

Ray.

Why did he always assumed he could take everything without ever asking?

Why doesn't Jungkook take without asking?

These are questions you can't answer. Deep down you know you don't want them, that answers would only cause you more pain.

You swallow, trying to shut off the bitter taste of the past.

"Please…"

You can't say anything else, you whisper this simple word that encompasses everything you're feeling right now.

Please do it.

Please make me forget all the bad things for tonight.

Please take me.

His eyes light up and his skilled hands easily remove the fabric that covered your most intimate part.

Only now you do realize how uncomfortable and annoying the wet fabric you were wearing was.

You feel the cool air hit the moist and hot skin of your pussy and you sigh when his hands return to you after leaving the newly removed garment somewhere on the floor.

He gently places his hands on your thighs, spreading them just enough so he can observe your dripping wet pussy.

Seeing the glisten of your juices makes his blood burn in his veins.

You gasp when his soft lips lay on your clit.

Jungkook is humming delightedly, then he starts to kiss it with delicacy, allowing you to adapt to the stimulus while he lets his tongue tease you slowly.

You close your eyes and try to relax your legs.

His lips are more insistent, until he ends up making out with your soft wet pussy.

You can't hold back your moans and you lie down completely on the bed as you let him eat you out.

Just as you had done earlier, he maintains a slow but precise pace, as if he wants to take revenge for all the teasing and savor your flavor at the same time.

Unlike his, your moans follow one another and you can't stop yourself.

They gradually become stronger and more intense as Jungkook continues to make out with your pussy.

He holds your hips, soothing the skin right beneath his thumbs with circular motions.

It's a sensation you've never felt before, you feel your orgasm building slowly, so slowly that you almost think you'll lose it at any moment, only to change your mind when with precise movements you feel the pleasure accumulating, like waves that add to each other. One after another, before reaching the coast in one large, powerful wave.

He moves his tongue with a constant rhythm and when with a faint voice you warn him that you are about to come, surprisingly enough, Jungkook maintains the same rhythm, he doesn't speed up, he doesn't press his tongue more forcefully against your already very sensitive clit.

With pleasant surprise, you notice that he keeps this pace and it is clear that he knows what he is doing.

He doesn't go crazy trying to catch it, when he already knows where and how to find it.

The only difference is the intensity with which he makes out with your pussy, kissing and licking it passionately, drunk on your juices.

You moan louder as your body tenses more and more like a violin string, until with a delicate but firm movement of his tongue, your orgasm hits you violently.

With his gentle and precise gestures, you didn't expect such an intense and violent orgasm, your body writhes in ecstasy while a string of profanities and panting breaths leave your lips.

Your legs try to close as they tremble from the stimulation, but Jungkook firmly separates them again, enjoying the taste of you for a little longer. You hear him groan and at a quick glance you notice his frowning expression.

You whine from the overstimulation and it's the only signal that seems to stop him.

He pulls off while still remaining in front of your throbbing and swollen pussy and his labored breathing tickles you gently.

“Sorry,” he states, licking his shiny lips for a moment. “You taste so sweet I couldn't stop.”

You look at him while you feel a constant pounding in your chest and your breathing doesn't want to calm down.

His hair is disheveled, his cheeks are flushed and his eyebrows are still a little furrowed.

You prop yourself up on your elbows again, one hand reaching for his hair, letting it sink into its messy locks, as if wanting to tidy them up a bit.

"I wanna ride you now."

You state decisively and perhaps a little too pretentious, you add,

"Can I?"

Jungkook looks at you as he stands up, offers you a hand while you observe him in all his beauty, naked and with his erect member that you can't wait to welcome inside you.

Tonight you got to immortalize every detail of his body in your memory.

His totally tattooed arm, his sculpted body and his face, at times so sweet that you couldn't believe it is capable of contorting into those expressions of pleasure that you saw earlier.

You accept his hand and let him pull you onto him while he says "How can I say no when you ask it so nicely."

You smile mischievously and take the opportunity to accompany him, pushing him by the shoulders onto your bed.

Jungkook takes place where you were laying, he sinks into your sheets as he settles in.

You reach him with your legs still shaking and climb up until you're almost sitting on his thighs.

You pick up the condom that you had previously abandoned on the bed next to you, but before you can open it to let him put it on, you can't resist the temptation to put your mouth back on his inviting cock.

You give a provocative lick, spreading your saliva all over the surface you trace and you understand how much he too wants to finally be able to feel you when his hips suddenly move upwards.

"Fuck-"

You continue to lick slowly for a few moments while you stimulate him a little with your hand.

When you look at him, he's already looking at you and it doesn't surprise you, his mouth is slightly open as he tries to regulate his breathing.

He looks so sexy right now, you can see in his expression the immense heat burning in his irises. The need he feels to possess you.

"Stop teasing me."

His voice is strained and his face speaks clearly: if you continue like this he won't resist much longer, he can't wait to see you jump on his cock.

The mere look in his eyes makes you clench your walls in anticipation and with a little effort you finally get him to wear the condom.

You move to finally be able to position yourself on his erect member and begin to lower yourself. A shiver runs through your limbs, the small tingling you feel as he penetrates you is almost immediately replaced by pleasure.

Jungkook is big, but you're so wet that he can slide inside you with ease.

You support yourself with your hands on his chest as you close your eyes to fully enjoy the sensations you're feeling. You continue to move down until you are completely seated on him. You feel full, his hands resting on your hips and squeezing you lightly.

When you reopen your eyes, you look at him and get lost for an infinite moment in front of what you see.

Jungkook looks at you through eyes half closed in pleasure, he's been looking at you the entire time, as if the scene in front of him is the key to understanding the entire movie.

If memory had any capacity, this moment would take up most of the space in Jungkook's mind for a long time to come.

After a few moments, you feel like you've gotten used to his girth and can finally move up and down.

Despite your legs still shaking from your previous orgasm, you manage to move at an increasing pace.

You moan without caring about the sounds you make, music to Jungkook's ears as he lets you do what you want with him, accompanying your movements with his hands.

You move messily as your legs start losing strength. You alternate your motions by rubbing your clit on him, moaning loudly when you feel your little sensitive nub stimulated like this and the squelching sound of your pussy fills the room. 

Jungkook hastily moves his hands behind your back, pulling at your bra to unclasp it. He doesn't take it off of you completely though, finding it more sexy the way he jumps up and down following your movements. 

"Fuck yes.."

He groans as he watches hypnotized your breasts bouncing out of your bra.

Then he tilts his head back onto your pillow as his arms flex with the motions of your body.

You bounce on his cock the best you can, tracing the side of his throat with your thumb, right above a little red spot you sucked on his skin.

The vision is enchanting.

The sounds he makes, addicting.

You're breathless, the muscles of your legs are burning from the effort but you keep bouncing and humping as you feel you're close to the second orgasm of the night.

"I-I'm clo-"

You're so close to the point of no return but suddenly, your legs are failing you and just like that, you tiredly collapse on his body.

Jungkook is quick to react, grabbing your hips tight enough to support you and adjust his position under you as he starts to thrust up.

Your moans are broken by every thrust as he diligently hammers your pussy up just right.

"You're so hot Y/N. So fucking hot."

He groans softly, pulling you impossibly closer.

You feel strange, like you're burning alive and flying at the same time.

You comfortably lay on his body as you let him lead you to the peak of your pleasure, licking and kissing his neck and ear lobe in the meantime.

"Fuck yes- yes!"

You moan his name as the fire explodes all of a sudden and the extreme pleasure you've built till now, crushes hard on you. And just like that, you feel your legs shake and your head light like a leaf blown by a gentle breeze.

Jungkook's thrusts slow down a little, milking your orgasm slowly till the very end. He only stops when you start whimpering, knowing you're probably super sensitive right now.

He pulls out and you whine to the feeling of emptiness, your walls slightly pulsing as you already miss the sensation of his cock deep inside of you.

"Are you ok?"

He asks you as he tries to stabilize his breathing.

Your body is still glued to his, your breathing is as ragged as his and you let the beating sound of his heart soothe you for a moment longer before you nod.

You slowly get up hissing a little and you look at him.

"Cum on me."

There's no longer space for filters and your brain is so fucked out that it doesn't even care how needy you sound right now. Even after your two orgasms. 

You're craving his touch, his sinful sounds, and you wanna know what it feels like to have his cum on your skin.

He smiles amused, chuckling a little.

"Yeah? And where do you want me to cum?"

His voice is husky and you feel your body reacting to that.

You buck your hips on his cock, blocking it between you and his stomach. 

Are you even sane right now? Did he fuck you out of your own brain?

"On my ass."

Yes, you're totally gone.

You're totally gone for this man.

You watch him as you keep moving on him, you see he swallows a moan as your wet pussy keeps rubbing on his member.

"Aren't you sensitive right now?"

He asks lowly.

"I can handle it."

You sit up, your battered pussy is still recovering from two orgasms but you know you can take it and you just want to show him how badly you still want him inside of you.

He laughs mischievously, looking at your fucked out beautiful face with pride.

"Lie on your belly for me, then."

You willingly obey, throwing your bra out of the way completely and resting your figure on your belly, just as he asked.

You can't see him from this position, you only feel his hand reach for your leg, bending it so that you're able to turn a little to the side.

He now has the possibility to keep looking at your body from this perspective. He has your ass, the side of your breast and your face at his mercy and he can't wait to enjoy your every expression from here.

"Stop me if it's too much."

You feel the weight of his firm body lay on you as he whispers, and when you turn your head to nod you meet his face, dangerously close to yours that you can feel his hot breath caressing you.

You're spread under him, fresh out from the two orgasms he just gave you and totally naked, yet there it is, the look you wanted to avoid earlier, the one you knew would make you feel really, really vulnerable. 

The mixture of his cares, his soft voice and his piercing dark eyes are sending danger signals to your brain as it feeds something deep in your chest.

You try to escape, diverting your eyes from the magnetism of his by nodding.

Jungkook pulls a little away, positioning himself right at your entrance.

You can hear him spit and the next thing you feel is his lubricated cock slowly pushing in.

You never felt like this, never had multiple orgasms and still wanted to fuck. The sensitivity is still there, you feel the heat spreading to your nerves as he slowly but surely bottoms up.

It's only when he starts moving that you feel a peak in your pleasure, like he is able to touch all the right spots at once.

He finds a rhythm, grabbing the flesh of your ass and pulling you to meet his hips.

Your breath is irregular, just like his, and you start pushing your palm on the sheets as every thrust is pushing you up the bed.

Jungkook has a better idea though.

He lets go of your ass completely as he swiftly grabs your arm and blocks it behind your back.

Feeling restrained like this by him causes a moan to escape your throat, followed by another one when he uses your arm as a grip instead of your ass to keep you in place.

"You like that huh"

He says through gritted teeth, the angle allows him to see the profile of your face as he fucks you hard and steady. 

Your sweet innocent face, contorted in pleasure is an ethereal vision to his eyes.

And the fact that it's him causing you to feel this good, makes him feral.

You say yes a couple of times between your moans and heavy breaths.

He speeds up his pace a little more, always cautious of your reactions, not wanting you to feel any discomfort.

But what he hears from you next is what makes his balls tighten dangerously.

"Slap my ass, please-"

Your voice is broken but firm as you say it and something about it makes him go completely insane.

Perhaps the "please" part, or the way in which you're voicing your desire right now, mixed with your sweet moans and submissiveness.

He slaps his free hand onto your buttock hard enough to sting, and listens to the smacking sound and the throaty moan you let out resonate in his ears.

"Oh fuck-"

He lets out, pure ecstasy laced in his raspy voice as he soothes your skin.

His thrusts are becoming sloppier, more erratic, and he's louder than before as he's chasing his own orgasm now.

You're addicted to the sounds he makes during sex, that's clear by now. Every time a throaty moan escapes his lips, you wish you could record it and use it when you'll be alone.

Suddenly, he frees your arm and pulls out. You assume he's taking off the condom as you try to regain some strength to push your hair away and look at him over your shoulder. 

You watch him pumping fast his cock as his free hand strokes the reddened skin of your ass.

His eyes are shut tightly and you keep watching him moan loudly as spurs of his hot cum land on your ass.

He keeps pumping till the last drop then he slaps his cock on your cum covered skin and you've never seen something hotter than what just happened.

When he comes down from his orgasm, he smirks at you, tired and satisfied.

You chuckle softly, covering your face with your arm without even noticing.

“Fuck, that was-”

"Amazing. Yes"

It was, it was indeed amazing.

He finishes your sentence in a small voice as he tries to steady his ragged breathing, still remaining where he is.

You feel his hot seed slowly dripping down your skin and when your breath is stable enough you move to the side of the bed to get up.

“I'm gonna take a quick shower, if you don't mind.”

you say, moving to get to your bathroom.

“Not at all, go ahead.”

When your shower is over and you feel refreshed and relaxed, you return to your room with only a robe covering you, your skin still a little damp under the fabric of the robe.

Surprisingly you find him fully dressed, you sure didn't expect him to stay longer but you at least wanted him to take a shower before leaving.

"Are you sure you don't wanna take a shower too?"

You ask him as you approach.

"Yeah don't worry." you watch him as he brushes his hair out of his face and fixes his clothes.

You remain silent after that, it feels strange and a little heavy.

Should you ask him to stay? 

Will it be awkward from now on? 

Was it a mistake from the beginning?

You don't want him to think you're kind of kicking him out. The unhealthy overthinking starts pestering you and you don't even notice you've walked with him to the door of your apartment.

He gathers his helmet and jacket from the floor and turns to you with a little smile.

"I better go. Don't want Ducky to get jealous."

It makes you laugh lightly and you can't keep yourself from playfully rolling your eyes at him.

It's still him, the Jungkook that loves to tease you and makes silly jokes.

You probably needed this to get back on earth and realize that you should stop overthinking.

"Oh! Of course we don't want that!"

You emphasize and your fake concern makes him chuckle. 

It won't be awkward from now on after all.

You open the door for him and when he comes out he zips up his jacket, ready to leave.

"Let me know when you're going to the shop to get your gear."

He smiles, one of those smiles that make the drums go crazy in your chest.

"I will. Drive safe."

And for a moment you smile at each other, probably knowing that from this exact moment, it won't be easy to keep your hands away from each other.

Tonight marked an important step for you, not only the boost of confidence that you sported, but you can tell with certainty that your past is still bothering you, from time to time, but it doesn't have your present in its claws.

The decisions you made tonight could bring you to another disappointment, to another loss. Especially when this sensation on your chest keeps going off almost as a reminder, telling you 'Hey, in case you didn't notice, I'm right here!'

It will probably pass if you just ignore it…

It will go away as fast as it came… Right?

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[keeksandgigz]

roll for initiative (part two of lessons in alchemy)

barista!eddie munson x fem!barista!reader AU

summary: You venture into your new position at Eddie's cafe, but you seem to be having a hard time. Eddie gives you hell for refusing to be trained. The confrontation comes to a head after you say something you shouldn't have. A heated game of DnD leaves you wondering about the purpose of this place. Things heat up after you and Eddie close the store alone.

cw: 6.8k words, swearing, modern setting, Eddie and reader being mean to each other, shitty description of a DnD game, teeny bit of angst (sorry), horny sexual tension, smut, spanking, choking, not quite piv yet, fingering, denial this is 18+ minors dni!!

a/n: Surprise! One day early because I'm an impatient little shit. i dunno how to play DnD i'm going off whatever my boyfriend tells me. also kill em all IS the best metallica album, argue with the wall. Debated on making it a two- parter but i wanted to get to the smut <3 pls like and reblog! feedback always appreciated and my ask box is always open if u wanna talk!!!

baby taglist: @corrodedcoffincumslut, @sleepy-bunnie,, @crybabyddl (let me know if you want to be added!)

Eddie's right.

You're indeed crashing and burning as you make those stupidly named lattes, but the rest of the crew is nice enough to help you along the way. Virginia really is coming into her own, quickly mastering every drink that is thrown her way.

Yet you can't shake off the feeling of Eddie stalking towards you, his hot breath on your face. How it didn’t scare you, rather, it excited you. You enjoy picking fights with him, ripping him apart and him doing the same to you. It's not healthy, but it helps with your anger.

“Those were three pumps of elderflower. I believe you need four for a large, sweetheart. Crashing and burning so soon?” he comes up behind you, startling you. 

“Get the fuck off of me before I throw this scalding hot drink at you” not when you're working. You cannot take his taunts while working. 

“Just checking up on you” he shrugs “maybe you might have changed your mind about me training you. I know these are not the dumb little detox drinks you do at your cafe. Which is really what makes the store much more interesting and attractive, doesn’t it?” 

“Eddie I swear to God” it becomes more than taunts. He seriously wants to fuck with your brain. 

“Jeff” he snaps his fingers towards the guy “I’m gonna go take my lunch, you’re in charge ‘til I’m back” his attention diverts away from you for a second, then back to you. “Could you be a dear and make me an extra hot flat white with almond milk? Add a couple pumps of Irish cream syrup in there. I’m expecting a white dot, after all if you’re so perfect you don’t need training that’s gonna be a walk in the park for ya, huh?” he leans against the counter and he’s so condescending it makes your knees tremble. 

“Yeah, duh. I’ll spit in it for ya too. Sounds good?” you panic a bit. Flat whites are not your forte. 

“I knew you’ve been spitting in my drinks, sweetheart. Kinda hot, to be honest. But that’s a violation, wouldn’t wanna get Jim involved, do we?” he raises his eyebrows at you, looking down at you, making you feel like a coffee bean on the ground. Kinda hot. 

“I was just joking, dickhead” 

“Hm. Better be. Another filthy word from you and I’m sending you home.” he whispers. “Alright, going on my lunch. Virginia, you’re off you can go home, Chrissy, take your last break in thirty minutes” and with that, he disappears to one of the tables, watching you make his drink.

That should be a form of cruel and unusual punishment. Just him staring at you, making sure you get his drink right. Pull two ristretto shots.

You aren't buzzing anymore, rather, your brain begins shutting off, drained by all the tension that has been building between you and Eddie. Two pumps of Irish cream. Maybe you actually aren't good enough to be here. Froth the almond milk. Maybe he's right, maybe you are meant to work in a mediocre cafe, making shitty drinks. Espresso first, then milk. You aren't good enough for this level of mastery. 

Fuck. No white dot. 

You tremble as you walk towards Eddie, sitting at his table, watching you bring him a cup of mediocre coffee. 

“No white dot” he says, looking at you with displeasure. 

“I’m sorry, I-”he interrupts you.

“You wanna get trained or are you gonna be a little know-it-all and then deliver me this?” he sips on his flat white. 

“Ok, fine. Train me, whatever.”Embarrassment overtakes you, wanting a hole to form under your feet and engulf you. 

He's right, he has been right all along. Tears begin to prick at your eyes.

“You okay there? Y’know I was joking, right? It doesn’t matter I just-” a spark of guilt lights itself in his throat, you look like you're about to cry. 

“Can I take a second?” you say, the knot in your throat threatening to snap any second. 

“Yeah, um go- go take your break” he breathes. Fuck, he's made you cry. 

You run off towards the back, wanting to disappear. Everything that has happened within those past two days begin to wash over you.

Your cafe is gone, the project you had worked on with your dad before he got sick, gone for the next year. And he’d likely not see it reopen.

Eddie being an asshole, holding a grudge on you because you took his customers, making your life a living hell. 

You sit in the back as you wipe some tears that fell from your eyes. Across the room, there's a door that you have not seen before, and it's ajar.

Curiosity gets the best of you, as you walk into a small, secluded room. It's full of beakers and jars of ingredients, really selling the whole alchemist thing. You look through the ingredients elderflower, rose, peppermint, honey, basil. Basil syrup sounds disgusting. 

You turn towards the work bench, noticing a bottle full of clear liquid labeled lavender syrup. You open it and immediately smell the astringent flavor coming from the bottle. You pour some on your finger and take a taste. Ew.

He needs a better lavender syrup recipe.

“The fuck are you doing in here?” Eddie’s voice makes you drop the bottle to the floor, shattering and spilling the astringent liquid on the floor. 

“Oh- shit sorry! I was just- i just got curious” 

“You can’t just come in here and act like you own the place. Curious my ass, you were trying to steal” he accuses, and that hurts you.

“You know I won’t fucking do that, I take my work seriously. Also your lavender syrup tastes like ass, and basil syrup? That sounds foul” you wince, stepping over the broken glass, to make your way back to the front.

He grabs your arm and stops you. “Aren’t you gonna clean that up? Broom’s in the closet” he says, offering you a smug smile. 

“Get the fuck away from me, asshole” you reply, jerking away from his grip. 

“Alright that’s it” is all he says before he slams you against the wall.

He's close. He's so fucking close. 

Your back slams against the brick, hitting a random canvas panel. You can feel his breath on your face, the smell of coffee and cologne inundating your senses. 

“You have been a fucking pain in my ass since you opened your dumb little cafe. You’ve been rude, unruly, untidy and down right mean towards me, and I’m fucking over it” he seethes, he has you caged in between his tattooed arms and all you can think of is tracing every line of his tattoos with the tips of your fingers.

“It’s been four fucking hours, y’hear me? Four hours and I’m sick of you. Y’think you’re cute? You’re a fucking brat, sweetheart, and I don’t like dealing with brats like you.” Your stomach feels funny, like you're taking on a challenge rather than a scolding.

“Clean your shit up and go home, I don’t wanna see your fucking face today. Come back when you have gained some common sense in that empty fucking head” he lowers his arms, but you aren't done. 

“Or what? You think you’re so scary, Eddie, with your stupid tattoos, your fucking stupid hair and your stupid satanic shirts. I don’t give a shit who you are, I’m employed to work here and you can’t fucking send me home because you don’t like me. I’ll fucking report you, freak” 

Freak. His breath hitches at that, years of high school bullying getting under his skin again, making him swallow hard at the unwelcome memory of being slammed against a locker on Monday mornings before class. He stiffens up.

“Alright” he swallows “clean this up and get back to work, I don’t wanna see you right now” you notice that his demeanor has changed, you visibly hit a nerve. Guilt pools at your chest.

“But what about- about the training?” you ask, voice hitching.

“I’ll get Gareth to train you, Virginia should have gone home already. That way we’re both happy. Take tomorrow off, I’ll see you Tuesday” and with that he leaves.

He keeps himself buried in his office until the end of your shift. He can't bear to stand the sight of you, not after you had called him a freak. That stung more than whatever stupid insult you could have flung his way. 

When you turn up on Tuesday, Eddie is nowhere to be found. 

“He took the day off,” Steve says. And you feel real fucking bad. You're scheduled for a mid- shift from three to seven.

“Hey” Jeff says “we’re closing early today ‘cause we’re doing a DnD campaign after. Since Eddie’s not here, would you mind taking over for me so I can start setting up? We close at six-thirty, so after that you can, like, sweep, do dishes and then you can go home” 

You aren't in the mood for a snide remark or a witty comment, so you just agree. “Is Eddie gonna be here tonight?” you ask. You’ve been trying to hound him to apologize for whatever happened the day before, it's clear he's avoiding you. 

He was supposed to be on the schedule. 

“Yeah uh” he replies “he’s our DM, so we kinda need him” he shrugs. 

“DM?” you froth a cup of oatmilk, turning towards him while he's making his drinks.

“Yeah. Dungeon Master?” he gives you a Isn’t that obvious? expression and goes back to his iced hazelnut macchiato. 

“Kinky” you retort, he laughs a bit. 

At six-thirty you lock up the store and you confine yourself to the back for dishes. Keeping an ear out for Eddie’s voice, hoping he’d show up before 7. 

Colette left with Steve to work on the Halloween menu and “I don’t fuck with that nerd stuff” said Steve, fixing his glasses after putting his coat on. 

“…no Henderson you don’t get it “Kill ‘Em All” is definitely Metallica’s best album, are you shitting me? …No don’t come at me with that “Enter Sandman” bullshit you’re so basic for that, you fucking poser” your ears perk up at that. It's definitely Eddie. 

You peek your head out of the back door to see him set up a big table, followed by a bunch of what look like  high school students as they sit down, with their spiral notebooks and pens.

A bunch of small figurines scattered on the cardboard mat as Eddie sits at the head of the table, pulling out a leather bound folder covered in stickers and a cardboard screen. 

They're serious about this.

You're too busy staring at the crowded table to notice Eddie running towards you.

"Daddy didn't teach you it's rude to stare?"

You press yourself against the green tile wall to let him pass, words caught in your throat as you follow him into his office.

"Apparently daddy didn't teach you that stalking is bad either. What is it? Need somethin'?" he spits out and you can feel the venom in his words.

"Yeah, I just" you clear your throat. Talking was hard. He cocks an eyebrow at you as he begins rummaging through his desk drawers.

"Well?"

"I just wanted to apologize for-"

"For being a bitch the other day? Took you long enough" he scoffs as he retrieves a small tin box containing what you assume are dice.

"Um- yeah. I guess that" you shrug and turn your feet to leave the door.

"I need to hear you say it, sweetheart. It's not a real apology otherwise, is it?" he has this ability to make you feel so incredibly small with only the power of his words. Like he's talking to a toddler.

"I don't think that's necessary, Eddie, I mean um- I have to get back to work" you protest.

"You can go back to work when you give me a full apology" he's ticking you off, gloating in his victory of you admitting defeat. The white banner you're waving slowly turning red.

"You're being a cunt, take the apology and go play your stupid nerd game" you snap, and you can see his lips curling in a wicked grin. Challenge accepted.

"All this talk of me kicking you to the curb for your filthy mouth really isn't sticking huh? Sorry sweetheart, can't accept an apology you don't mean" he shrugs, heading out of his office, you follow him suit.

"Eddie what the fuck?! Are you actually mental?" you want to strangle him, shove those dice so far down his throat he chokes and dies.

"I'd recommend you scrub those dishes really hard, I can still see the grime on the blenders. If you'll excuse me, I gotta lead my party through the rivers of Bagodan" he winks and then he walks over to his table, leaving you mortified.

You do a once- over with the dishes, while hearing Eddie's shrill voice screech and laugh every time one of his players miss. What's so fucking funny about a couple kids rolling dice?

"Looks like you've made it to the last river" he narrates in a solemn voice, deeper, hotter "Oh, but what is that? You hear shrieking from a distance. It's a sphynx. To cross the river you have to behead the sphynx and bring it to the king of Bagodan. Only then he will grant you access to the wings of Saurion the Elder, and you... will be... free" he says in a whispered tone.

"What do you do, my brave adventurers?"

"Shit" you hear one of the kids swear, he's tall with black hair. "We don't have enough hit points to kill the sphynx AND get through the king's palace guards"

"You’re astute dipshit, congrats!" says another, a girl, looking much younger than the rest.

"We would have had enough points if Dustin here, hadn't fucking sold his to the market for a stupid cloak" says Gareth, shoving the kid who you assume is Dustin

"it was aN INVISIBILITY CLOAK" Dustin yells. The room booms in laughter at the kid's tantrum.

It makes you think. About how you've never had a group of friends like that. Someone to share a common interest with. Sure, you have Colette, but you've moved to town just fairly recently, and you have lived and breathed work for the first two years. No friends to make when you're cooped up home buried in projects among projects. No friends to make when your dad is sick and you have to take him to the hospital on Saturdays for his treatment. You sigh a bit at that. Maybe your cafe exploding is the catalyst that is gonna bring you a new life, a new perspective.

Coming to a store that has unity as a top value really makes you reflect on how lonely your life has been so far.

"Alright children, let's take a break and you can talk strategy. Anyone want a drink?" He stands up from his chair and walks towards the bar. Startled, you go back to the sink and begin scrubbing.

"Y'know you can join us, right?" he leans against the green tile wall, looking at you.

"Join in on that nerd shit? No, thanks. My shift is over" you say putting the last blender on the drying rack and heading to the back.

He follows you "Okay, whatever. I just wanted to tell you it's gonna be me and you tomorrow. Chrissy said she can't make it. Something about midterms" and you roll your eyes.

"Fucking perfect. Tell me in what world does this shit always happen to me" you say exasperated, taking off your apron, which allows your shirt to rise just enough that it gives Eddie a peek of your tummy. Enough to make him gulp a little. Enough to distract him for ten seconds.

He shakes his head. "Listen, I'm not happy about it either, but let's keep it civil, okay? I do my thing, you do yours, we're outta here by 9 pm" he offers, leaning over the metal lockers.

You're not sure if it was the Dungeon Master demeanor he keeps on for the sake of his game or what, but he feels so tall. The thought of it makes you shiver. You put on your jacket.

"How you gettin' home?" he asks.

"Driving" you lie, your car broke down the day before, but you don't want him offering you a ride.

"Alright, I'll see you tomorrow for closing, then" he says, giving you a tight smile.

"Yeah, bye" you respond hastily, heading out towards the bus stop. Eddie keeps an eye on you through the store window the whole time.

Wednesday night at the "Mad Alchemist" is busier than you expected. Steve left for the evening, leaving you and Eddie to man the fort by yourselves.

Meaning you have to watch him flirt with every fucking customer. Young, old, boy, girl. His self assured demeanor is like a magnet to those coffee- hungry teens, the older women just blush and deliver him a meek "aw, stop it, Eddie" swatting the air and giggling.

Because you both have been so busy, it has not given you time to run your mouth and deliver him some snarky comment.

By 8pm, the store is closed. You have an hour to sweep, clean the counters, mop and do the dishes while Eddie counts the money at the register.

There is a tense quietness in the cafe. Almost as if you know that if one opened their mouths the world would explode. Or you’d start fucking, whichever one comes first. There is no noise aside from the register opening, the broom dragging across the floor and Eddie whistling.

After a day of talking, listening, screaming, shouting, the last thing you want to do is hear Eddie whistle. You let him do it, one minute, two minutes, five minutes in hopes he would get tired.

“Eddie, please” you whine.

“Helps me count money better,” he shrugs, beginning his atrocious whistling again.

You wait one, two, five minutes again. The noise of the sweep and the whistling and the money become too much for you, so in an exasperated rage, you kick the chair in front of you.

“Eddie shUT THE FUCK UP!”

The noise of the chair is the only sound in the building. Eddie stops counting, and stops whistling.

He's just staring at you. At the fallen chair. At the broom next to your feet. You find the floor to be really interesting.

“Pick it up.” Eddie’s voice is distant. A few seconds go by, and your eyes are still on the floor.

The sound of paper being put down and the stomping of heavy boots follow, until his boots arrive in your line of sight. You can't help but raise your head.

“What part of ‘pick it up’ does not register in that head? Hm? Do you kick chairs at home?”

Defeated, you shake your head.

“Do you call your daddy names?”

Another head shake.

“Do you spit in your daddy’s coffee in the morning?” his voice becomes a whisper, so, so close to your face. So close to your lips.

“I didn’t-” he cuts you off.

“I don’t appreciate liars, sweetheart. Did you spit in my drink?” he's cornering you, making you feel small.

You nod. “Only once, though” you defend yourself.

“Only once” he mocks, chuckling to himself “sixteen.” he mutters.

“Sixteen is the number of times, from the first time i stepped foot in your goddamn cafe, I’ve seen you spit in my fuckin’ drink” he seethes, no, growls.

“Now you’re fucking lying” you interject, finding a small crumb of courage within you.

“Don’t act cute, I’ve seen you. Pick the chair up” he says, his chin tilting towards the chair on the floor.

“I can’t pick it up if your stupid arm’s in the way, can I?” he grunts and moves his arm. You bend over and picked the chair up, breathing through your teeth. You're furious.

“Watch your attitude, here we don’t-”

You snap your neck around “You’re a fucking control freak, that’s what you are” you mutter. There's that word again. Freak.

“Don’t you fucking dare call me that word again” he's furious.

You turn around to face him. It's your turn to be close “Or what? You gonna spank me?” it's barely a whisper, looking at him through your lashes. A challenge.

He exhales, crossing his arms “You know what? That’s the best idea you’ve had since you’ve stepped foot in this place. Bend over the table” He whispers, and you freeze.

If there is a definition to fuck around and find out, you're it.

“Seems you might be a bit hard of hearing, sweetheart. I said bend over.” he says, more gently, yet keeping that domineering aura to him. He nudges your arm.

You quietly follow through.

“Now you’re following orders. Before I start I need to know you’re okay with this” he whispers, caressing your back in an almost soothing manner.

You nod.

He tuts “None of that shit. I’m not doing anything until I have your green light. With words”

“I-” words suddenly become hard. You swallow and breathe through your nose “I’m- I’m okay with this”

There is no denying you're extremely turned on, in addition to being revved up by your previous fight. It feels like wildfire spreading itself from every tip of your body, finding a home right between your legs.

“Alright, good. If you want me to stop we can stop at any time, just say ‘chainmail’” he says, looking around to check if the blinds had been lowered. He has a safeword. He knows what he's doing.

“O-okay” you say with all the power you can muster.

“You wanna act like a toddler, sweetheart? I’ll treat ya like a fuckin’ toddler” he says, before delivering the first smack right on the meat of your left butt cheek.

You’ve tried spanking before, with previous partners, but this is different. The smacks are calculated, like he knows where to hit. A yelp escapes you.

“Need ya to count” he says, caressing the area he just hit.

“‘Kay, fuck. One” you exhale, still feeling his handprint on your ass. The red hot sting from the impact leaving tiny pinpricks through the fabric of your jeans. 

Smack. Two.

“How ‘bout this?” he stops, speaking to no one, really. “How ‘bout I give you one spank for every time you’ve spit in my coffee, hm?”

That makes you tremble a bit. Sixteen slaps. 

“I dunno if I can, I mean I-” 

“Then you know what to say if it gets too much, right? Say ‘Yes, Eddie, I do’” his voice makes your knees give out as his other hand, the one that isn't squeezing and groping your ass, makes its way into your hair and pulls. 

“Ow- Fuck, Jesus Christ Eddie!” you yell, but the pull at your scalp makes you wish he’d drop the antics, pull your pants down and fuck you immediately. 

“Not what I wanna hear, sweetheart. Try that again” He smacks your ass again, pulling his hand out of your hair to hold your back down from the waist. 

“Three, fuck. Yes, Eddie, I-I do” you exhale and prop yourself up on your elbows. 

“Good girl,” he says. Good girl. He could easily smack you in the face and that is would shock you less. Where the fuck did he learn all this shit?

By the time you’ve reached spank number ten you think you're ready to tap out. Tears welling in your eyes, making your vision go blurry. You're turned on, but Eddie’s heavy hand is becoming too painful.

He notices you trying to squirm away from him with every hit of his hand, all he says is “You know what to say, don’t you, sweetheart?” 

But you let him keep going. Thirteen, Fourteen, Fifteen, Sixteen.

The last slap feels like the roughest, leaving in its wake the phantom of a heavy hand. His hand rubbing circles on your ass, almost like he doesn't feel ready to stop touching you.

You turn your head around, so you're able to see his face.

“Mmmm, so what now?” you ask, still hazy “Gonna take me home, Eddie? Finish the job?”it's like your brain has forgotten who you are talking to.

“C’mere” he says, sitting you down on the table, your ass rough and sore under the fabric of your pants.

You can feel the slick feeling between your legs through the seam of your black jeans, hoping he’d move you to keep going, take you home, his office, his van, anywhere. 

His body settles between your legs as his hands run through the expanse of your stomach, your back. Your hands make their way to the buckle of his belt, trying to quickly undo his jeans. Eddie inhales as if to convince himself to stop you as he grabs your wrists and pushes them to your chest, his belt left unbuckled “Not tonight,” he murmurs.

You pout in protest.

“Aww, you’re pouting” he mocks, a dry laugh escapes his lips. It brings a twang of embarrassment "pouting 'cause I'm not letting you take my dick in your mouth, sweetheart?" he taunts. 

“I‘m not pouting” you mutter, looking at the floor. His hands grab your chin, lifting your eyes to make you look up at him. He looks so tall standing over you like that, eyes still glossed over, pupils blown from the spanking he’s just given you. 

“You look at me when I speak to you, yeah?” Oh fuck. You know better this time. 

“Yeah” you croak out, nodding your head in case he doesn't get the message. 

“Yeah? You liked getting spanked? Being put in your place?” his demeanor never fails in making you feel impossibly small.

The hand that holds your chin travels down your neck and you lean into his touch, in the way his hand wraps itself around your throat, warm and rough. Who are you to say he isn't gonna strangle you and kill you? 

But the feeling of his hand around the column of your neck, covering its whole surface area feels too intoxicating, like you want him to make you stop thinking. Your breath hitches. 

“You’re lucky I didn’t have my rings on. With the way you’ve been running your mouth you would’ve more than deserved it” his grip on your neck going from resting to actually applying pressure to the sides of your throat. You gasp. 

He just watches you, eyes glossy and desperate while you try to press your thighs together to relieve some pressure. Poor thing. He almost feels bad for you. The way he sees you keen into his touch, labored breath, watching your chest rise and fall slowly. 

“We can’t do this here, Eddie. The health violations” you say,  barely a whisper, mustering whatever breath and thought you can. Your brain feels foggy and fuzzy with the slight pressure of air being constricted. He chuckles. 

“Didn’t you go to UCLA or something? Aren’t you supposed to be really smart?” his tone is mocking, you swallow at the embarrassment, hand letting up on your throat to grab your hand. He isn't here to be soft with you. He is here to make a point.

“Me choking you got you actin’ all dumb already?’M impressed. C’mon get off the table, we can’t be here” he says, making you stand up. 

“Where- where are we going?” you feel winded, and you haven't even done anything. He leads you through the cafe, the bar, the back of house, where the drying dishes sit abandoned on the rack. Right at the threshold to his back office, the cold green tile arch pressing against your back.

“I don’t know, but I really wanna kiss you right now.” and you feel like your breath has just gotten knocked out of you. He wants to kiss you?

"You wanna- huh?" he slams you against the wall, just t prove a point "Shut the fuck up" he says as he puts his lips on yours. Famished, animalistic.

There is no room for gentleness. No room for sweet caresses and soft praises. His hands groping and feeling your hips, grinding into him. The friction against his tattered jeans make a whine escape you. Too much and not enough.

His teeth clash with yours as you both open your mouths, the way he tastes made you dizzy. His mint gum and cigarettes inundate your senses as you pull at the hair tie that is keeping Eddie's unruly hair in place.

Reaching under the mane of hair, you pull at his nape, where his curls are smaller, more defined. He groans.

His nose skims your jaw and licks at the hinge between the bone and your neck, making you yelp. A small oh escapes you when his hands work to untuck your shirt out of your jeans, his cold hands sneaking past the barrier of clothing to touch at the skin of your stomach, the sides of your breasts.

His mouth is warm against your neck, tracing every ridge, every line, every mole, 'til he reaches the juncture between your neck and your shoulder and he bites.

"Eddie, you fucking freak don't bite me" you hiss, head thrown back as he lifts your shirt up, leaving it completely abandoned on the floor.

He moves you off the wall and into his office, mouth not stopping his assault on your neck, stumbling towards his cluttered desk. With one move, a space big enough for you to sit is created. His shirt comes off in the process. His pale chest, skinny, but toned and littered with tattoos, is the only thing you are able to pay attention to.

"I hear that fucking word come outta your mouth again I'll-" he begins.

"You what? More spanking? Consider me terrified" you interrupt, all an evil plan to egg him on. Blinking your eyes up at him. He is seething.

"God, do you ever shut up?" he asks, a groan leaving his lips continuing to kiss you, teeth and tongue and spit, his hands coming out from under your shirt to grab your chin.

You look up at him, hair wild and unruly, eyes blown out, a wicked glint in his eye, almost like he's plotting something.

“Open your mouth” he says, and you looked at him, a puzzled look on your face. He squeezes your cheeks in response, forcing your mouth open. “You fucking brat” he mutters.

You keep your mouth open, expecting his finger, something. Instead, a glob of spit makes its way onto your tongue. He spit in your mouth. You throb.

“Eddie what the fuck-” you begin, but he interrupts you.

“You didn’t seem to mind spitting in my coffee, did you? Consider this a payback. Swallow it.” he smirks against your lips, lightly tapping his fingers on your cheek, not quite a slap. You obey immediately for the first time that night.

His hand travels down to the seam of your jeans, your breath becoming more labored with all the building tension from the night.

“Eddie…please” you whine, arching into his hand, not wanting to pull back anymore. You want release, brain hazy with the feeling of being under him, the way his rough hands are touching you, exploring you, grabbing and groping at the curves of your body as you arch into him.

His hand begins moving back and forth, the heel of his palm making direct contact with the seam of your pants, forcing a strangled whine out of you.

You grind your hips in sync with his hand, as the other sits on your cheek, cupping it, moaning in his mouth at the small amount of friction he's giving you. “Can I take your pants off?” he asks, soft against your mouth. You’ve never nodded so fast in your life.

He quickly makes work of taking your shoes and jeans off, pooled at his feet while his hands caress and grope their way up your thighs.

“You’re cute when you’re not being a cunt, you know that?” he whispers against your mouth, hand ghosting over your panties, practically feeling the heat radiating off of you.

“Fuck you, Eddie,” you say through gritted teeth, motioning to hit him in the chest. He stops you, grabbing your wrists with his hands.

“I suggest keeping that filthy mouth at bay if you really want me to do something about that big, wet patch on your panties, hm?” he whispers, licking your bottom lip, his hand still keeping an iron grip on your wrists.

“How ‘bout you stop being a cunt and fuck me?” you’ve had enough of his teasing and taunting.

“Who said anything about fucking?” he chuckles, his hand moving down to grope at your ass. “No, see, that would be improper, don’t you think? Fucking your boss in his office. You kinky bitch” he delivers a sharp smack down to your ass, reviving the dull sting from the spanking earlier.

“You’re not my fucking boss, Eddie. Stop talking and- ohmygod”

His other hand begins massaging over the crotch of your panties, making direct contact with your clit over the fabric. “Made you this wet from spanking you? Think you might have actually been the freak this whole time, sweetheart.” He hooks his fingers on the sides of your panties “Lift.” He taps your thigh, you immediately lift your hips to let him take your panties off.

He laughs when he sees the mess that he’s made of your pussy.

“Fuck stop- stop laughing” you whisper out while his hands begin to spread your legs further.

“I think you secretly love me laughing at you. You think you’re so tough, bein’ all mean, callin’ me a freak like it doesn’t turn you on just imagining how much of a fucking freak I really am, huh sweetheart?” he skims your jaw with his nose, his words making you shiver as you clench around nothing.

His free hand sneaking its way around your neck, squeezing just enough to make you squeak.

Your hips lift off the desk, looking to find some kind of stimulation aside from Eddie’s cruel teasing touches.

He looks at you through his dark lashes “What is it, baby?” baby. baby. baby. The nickname makes your head spin.

“Eddie, I- fuck- please! I need-” your hips arch off the wooden surface as you feel his fingers prod your entrance.

“You need my fingers? Can you ask me nicely?” you want to kill him. He's reveling in the torture that he's putting you through.

“I f-ucking ah hate you” but you aren't really sure if you believe that yourself.

“You hate me sweetheart? I’m hurt. You won’t mind then if I just leave you here, do you?” he caresses over your inner thigh, the tips of his fingers coated in slick, clear arousal.

“No!” your hips lift once again “your fingers…please” His smile is pleased as one of his fingers enter you.

“That wasn’t so hard, was it? Good girl.” He's making your head spin, a choked noise leaves your lips as he pumps his finger in and out, finally getting the stimulation you need.

“More” you whisper, his other hand still on your throat.

“So greedy. Y’gonna thank me? Say ‘thank you, Eddie’”

At that point you can't even think about acting up. “F-fuck. Thank- thank you Eddie” and with that, he adds another finger.

God, you already feel so full and teetering the edge.

“Good girl. Now that I think about it, I believe you owe me an apology” he begins, his fingers working mercilessly inside you, while a string of breathy ah ah ahs are all the sounds you could muster.

“You were so mean to me the other day, I didn’t appreciate your tone while you were trying to apologize” he taunts, his fingers prodding deeper inside you. A small yelp escapes you.

“You were- you were ah” his fingers curl on your g-spot and your vision goes white.

“What was that? I was what, baby?” he begins to thumb at your clit, smiling like a maniac at the state he's reducing you in.

“Oh yes there” no idea how you're gonna finish your sentence.

“Feels good huh? Needa finish what you were saying, sweetheart, can’t have you going stupid on me just yet” his hand on your throat moves up to your cheek, delivering a couple light smacks to your face. You clench.

“Fuck, uh, you we-were being a oh god cunt” you say, mustering all the mental strength you can.

“Is that right? Funny how my fingers are in yours right now and you don’t seem to complain.” He laughs to himself, his thumb speeding up its assault on your clit.

“C’mon, sweetheart. I just need you to say ‘Sorry Eddie, I won’t be a bitch to you again.’ Can you say that or is your brain too fucking far gone to understand a single word i’m saying?” he teases, which briefly brings you back from the ecstasy of Eddie’s fingers working wonders on you.

“Fuck you, Eddie” you hiss through your teeth, immediately regretting it at the feeling of the coil in your belly beginning to tighten.

“Oh. It’s like that then. Alright” he simply says as he picks up his pace. Head thrown back as you revel in the feeling of nearing the edge of your release.

“Oh shit, get-getting close” you breathe.

“Apologize and I’ll let you cum” he smiles, a wicked show of bared teeth that only makes you both want to punch him and fuck him.

“Fuck n- Oh God- ‘m not apologizing for- for shit” you arch your back, trying to make yourself cum before he changes his mind.

“Fucking apologize” he insists.

“Fuck you” you say, followed by the unwelcome feeling of emptiness as he takes his fingers out. You really thought he was bluffing.

An empty ache grows in your stomach, feeling unfulfilled and disappointed. You sit there in disbelief, as he cleans his fingers off with a tissue.

“Pity” he shrugs “Get dressed, I’m taking you home” he turns around, heading towards the front.

You throw the box of kleenex at his head. You miss.

“You’re a real asshole, you know that?” you jump off his desk, ignoring the dull throb between your legs as you put your panties and jeans back on, following the trail of your clothes he left in his wake.

“Could’ve said sorry” he just says, closing up the register, while you put on your shirt and shoes “C’mon my van is around the back” he offers, grabbing his keys.

“I’m not fucking getting in your car. I can drive” you protest.

“Yeah, uh huh, you and what car, you fucking liar? Saw you at the bus stop the other day, and your car isn’t in the parking lot. You either let me drive or you can sleep in here tonight.”

You let him drive you home. The sound of Judas Priest blaring through the speaker only makes the stubborn silence between you two louder.

The ten minute drive to your house feels like an hour, as you itch to get off the dingy van and take care of what he left unfinished.

He finally parks up in front of your house, you quickly book it towards your door as he shouts “You’re welcome sweetheart” before you fumble with the keys and enter inside. He stays there until you do.

Your dad was asleep already, so you crack his bedroom door to check up on him. You sigh. Everything seems to be alright.

Once all the lights are off, you run towards your room. Still in disbelief of what happened with Eddie, you strip off your coffee- smelling clothes, wincing at the thought of Eddie’s hands sneaking under your shirt, his fingers hooking on the sides of your panties.

The feeling of hatred and arousal battling each other off while you recall his stupid smiling face as he removed his fingers from inside you. The dull empty ache as you came down from the euphoria of his touch and words.

That night, you kick yourself for not saying sorry to him.

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x you #stranger things #eddie munson fan fiction #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x reader fluff #stranger things fan fiction #eddie munson au #barista!eddie munson

[midnightsnyx]

girl at home | mat barzal | part 5

pairing: mat barzal x fem!reader summary: you’re eighteen when you find yourself pregnant after Mat leaves for hockey. nearly eight years later, Mat finds out about your daughter and you have to deal with the consequences of not telling him about her.

warnings: swearing, angst, food, fluff, not edited word count: 2.3k authors note: it's my bday tmw and i am going out of town for the weekend so i wanted to get this posted!! also, i have no idea how pr management works so i def got everything wrong so pls don't yell at me lol i feel like this chapter is just like a roller-coaster that went off the tracks and blew up and someones trying to put it back together with tape from the dollar store so im sorry but i hope yall like it anyway and don't hate me pls <3 send your thoughts or come yell at me about this story bc I LOVE hearing from you guys!! It feeds my writing soul. thank u all for the love on this story so far and lmk if you wanna be added to my taglist. also thinking about doing some smau for this fic and wondering if you guys have any ideas or suggestions?

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You didn’t think the situation with Mat’s statement could get any worse. You were already being pestered by your mom, your friends and even other parents at the day camps Nora attended. Mostly everyone knew that it was true that Mat was her father at that point so the statement caused questions to rise. Ignoring everybody’s opinions about it was easy but six simple words from Nora were what broke you. 

“I thought Mat was my daddy,” she said softly while eating breakfast one morning. She had been quiet since the day before but it continued when she woke up the next morning. You thought maybe she was just moody and tired but it ended up being much more than that.

It took you a minute to answer, trying to figure out where she might have heard or been told that. It wasn’t that surprising that she might have gotten the impression that he was her dad considering how much time Mat had been spending with the two of you or she overheard a conversation. Kids are very perceptive but you couldn’t see how anyone would directly tell her about the public statement and you had been very careful about what you said around Nora and told everyone else to do the same. 

Apparently someone didn’t get the memo. 

You had two options. You could lie to Nora about what was going on or you could explain it in the best way you could to her. Lying to your daughter was the last thing you wanted to do but figuring out the easiest way to explain it so she would understand was hard. How were you supposed to explain that yes, Mat is her daddy but he was a fucking idiot and told the world that she’s not even though he said he wanted to be in her life. It would have been so simple to take the easy way out but it wouldn’t have been fair to Nora so after she finished her breakfast, you sat her down. 

“You’re feeling a little confused, huh?” you asked, watching her fiddle with a loose string on her sweater. 

She nodded, still not looking up at you and not offering her thoughts. It was a bit alarming because she was usually a chatterbox, even when she was upset about something. She would let you know exactly what was wrong. 

“Who told you Mat was your daddy?” 

She finally looked up at you, and the tears threatening to spill from her eyes made you both angry and upset. You were ready to find whoever told her and scream at them but her answer stunned you.

“I heard you talking to Jaxy,” she whispered. “I wasn’t trying to listen but I was coming out to get some water and you said that you were mad at Mat.” 

She didn’t elaborate on what else she may have heard which was unnerving because you probably said a lot of things about Mat that night when Jax came over to talk to you about it. You hoped she didn’t stay long enough for your breakdown where you had cried for thirty straight minutes. 

She sniffled, wiping a couple tears away. “I don’t understand.”

Your heart broke but you still struggled with how to explain everything to her. Telling her in the beginning was probably a better idea but you were so caught up in your own thoughts and feelings, you ignored the person who should have been your number one priority the entire time. 

“Mat is your daddy, baby,” you said. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

I’m sorry I kept you a secret.

“How come everyone is saying he’s not?” 

Mat should have been the one to answer this question because it was his doing, but you hadn’t spoken to him since the night he was at your apartment and the two of you argued. He had texted you the day after but you ignored it because you didn’t know what you would say when given the chance.

“Well, sometimes people make mistakes and Mat said something he shouldn’t have,” you explained, hoping it was enough and it seemed to be enough at first but then she hugged you tightly.

“I love you mama,” she said and before you could reply, she quietly asked, “Do you think Mat loves me?” 

“I’m sure he does,” you told her and it took everything in you not to cry. 

. . .

Liana: dinner at our place @ 6. bring nora and don’t be late!!!

You’re tempted to decline the request and just stay home but you’ve been promising Liana and Nadia that you would actually visit instead of dropping Nora off and leaving like you’ve been doing. Avoiding Mat is becoming increasingly difficult. It’s been two weeks since he released the statement and a week since your conversion with Nora. She’s been asking a lot of questions, ones that you didn’t plan on having to answer so soon. You expected her to be angry with you for not telling her but she took your confirmation that Mat’s her dad with ease. 

So it didn’t come as a surprise when her first question was whether Mat would be at the Barzal household for this dinner. You hadn’t bothered to ask Liana, mainly because you knew it would definitely impact your decision to agree to go. 

“Did you know that Zoe’s mom and dad aren’t together either?” She says during the drive to the Barzal’s. 

You do know this but you humor her. “Really?”

“Yup. Zoe said she spends weekends with her dad and stays with her mommy during the week,” she explains and then moves on to a different topic. You’re a little curious why she would talk about her friends’ living arrangements but when you finally pull into the driveway, your question is answered. 

“Do I have to stay at Mat’s on the weekend?” She asks and if you hadn’t already parked the car, you would have hit the brakes. 

“No,” you say a little too quickly and sharply because she frowns. 

“How come?”

You don’t answer her question right away, getting out of the car and walking around to the other side. She’s already unbuckling her seatbelt by the time you open the door and she’s still frowning. 

“Just no, Nora.”

“But Zoe does!”

You can’t explain custody agreements to a seven-year-old so you say the first excuse you can think of. 

“He doesn’t live here,” you say, taking her hand and begin walking towards the house. She’s dragging her feet, clearly not happy with your response. 

“Do I have to call him dad?” 

“No.”

“Why?”

“Just ‘cause,” you say, stopping at the door and turning to her. Her arms are crossed and she’s giving you the look that says she won’t let up until you give her an answer she wants.

“Do you want to call him dad?” 

She pauses, looking down at the ground and frowning. After a moment she shakes her head. 

“No, but Miss. Jones says you’re not supposed to call your mommy and daddy by their first names ‘cause it’s disrespectful.” 

“It’s not up to Miss. Jones,” you say gently. “This is new, and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

After a moment, she mutters a quiet “okay,” and then: “do you think Nadia has ice-cream for dessert?”

“Guess we’ll have to go inside and ask,” you reply and raise your fist to knock on the door but it swings open before you can. Liana is waiting on the other side with a big smile on her face. Nora runs straight to her and giggles when the older girl picks her up and swings her around. 

“C’mon in,” Liana says, ushering you inside. So far there’s no sign of Mat so some of the tension leaves your body. After putting both yours and Nora’s shoes aside, you make your way to the kitchen. Nadia is puttering around, juggling a million things but she still smiles softly when she sees you. 

“Can I help with anything?” 

“You can keep me company,” she says and points to a chair. “Sit down and update me on what you’ve been up to.”

You know that you can’t argue with her so you sit and chat idly with her. She doesn’t bring up anything to do with Mat and you’re not sure what to think about it. You almost slip up and ask if he’s going to be here for dinner but decide not to. You haven’t seen him around since you arrived, so he’s probably out. Maybe with a girl. 

Not that you care, obviously. 

Mike eventually pokes his head in the kitchen to greet you and ask how you’ve been. He offers to set the table but Nadia shoos him out of the kitchen, rolling her eyes fondly. 

“Don’t get married, they’re nothing but trouble,” she jokes but there’s a smile on her face that lingers even after her husband leaves. You always admired their relationship, and were certain that you and Mat would be like it some day but it wasn’t in the cards. 

Soon, Nadia calls everyone to dinner. Nora immediately asks why Mat isn’t here and there’s an awkward silence until Liana breaks it.

“He’s busy,” she tells Nora and that must be enough because she just nods and starts eating dinner. Nothing else is said about Mat but just as you’re all finishing dessert, you hear the door open and close and there’s only one person you figure it will be.  

Mat walks into the dining room, clearly caught off guard by your presence. Nora hops off her chair and darts over to him, wrapping her arms around his legs and starts chatting excitedly. He’s trying to give her all his attention but his eyes keep flickering to you. 

When Nadia and Mike get up to start clearing the table and Liana asks Nora if she wants to go watch a movie, you realize that the three of them planned this. It’s almost like you’re kids again, fighting about something stupid and needing his parents to help fix the problem. 

Mat looks at you a little helplessly when the room clears and it’s just the two of you. There’s no way you can yell at him with his family and Nora in the next room and you realize that was also probably planned. 

“Can we talk?” he asks and you really don’t want to, but you realize that eventually you’re going to have to talk to him so you nod. You follow him out the back door and the two of you sit on the porch steps in silence until you finally break it.

“Why didn’t you come to me about what PR wanted to do? We could have figured out something together.”

He shrugs, looking at the ground. “I didn’t think to ask you about it. I just wanted to fix everything before it got complicated. I wasn’t thinking.” 

“Yeah, no shit,” you mutter. “That’s something you’re great at. You don’t think before you do anything.” 

You jump when he stands up suddenly and turns to face you. He’s angry but so are you.

“No, fuck that. You can’t just expect me to do everything right, when a month ago, all I had to worry about was hockey. I can’t be number one dad overnight! You didn’t even tell me about her for six years!” 

You’re a bit taken off guard by his sudden outburst but you can do anger too.

“That is the exact reason I didn’t tell you about her, Mat. Hockey is always going to come first in your life,” you snap. “And I didn’t ask you to be a number one dad, all I asked was that you be sure you wanted to be in her life before you committed to anything because this is exactly what I was worried about.” 

He falters a little, probably not expecting you to return the anger. 

“I didn’t want to post what they asked me to,” he says, sounding defeated. “But I didn’t know how to say no. When PR tells you to jump, you jump.”

You’ve no idea how public relations in hockey works, it’s possible that they would have posted the statement without asking Mat but you’re so damn angry. You’re angry but you don’t know who you’re even supposed to be mad at now. 

“You should have come to me,” you say again. “That’s how co-parenting works, you know.”

His mouth twitches. “That’s what we were doing?”

You can feel the anger slowly dissipating. Mat’s shoulders aren’t as tense and he plops back down on the steps so you sit next to him, letting your shoulders and knees knock against his.

“Well, you are her dad,” you admit. “And she is very concerned about her future living arrangements.”

He looks at you a little confused but there’s a small smile spreading across his face. 

“Does she know?”

“Yeah,” you tell him. “She’s smarter than you expect sometimes.”

“She gets that from you,” he says, poking your arm.

You roll your eyes fondly. “Well she had to get her brains from someone.”

He huffs but it sounds more like a laugh. You watch him look at the ground, brows furrowed and deep in thought.

“I fucked up, didn’t I?”

Here’s the thing that a lot of people don’t know about Mat: he doesn’t forgive himself easily. It’s something you learned the hard way when you were younger and dating. 

So you know he will beat himself up over this until you forgive him. 

“Yeah, but we both did.” You bump your knee against his until he looks up at you. “We can fix it, but we have to do it together.”

He holds out his pinky finger. ”Co-parenting, right?”  

You hook your finger around his and nod, letting yourself relax for the first time in weeks. It’s going to take time, hard work, and you’re both going to have to learn how to trust and communicate better again but you're sure you’ll get there.

“Together,” you agree.

tag list: @literatureluster @dasiysthings @barzyblogbabe @diary-of-jj @heatherawoowoo @fallinallincurls @topguncultleader @shadowsndaisies @lovinbarzal @whatthepuckisgoingon @alilstressyandlotdepressy @teapartydreams @keiva1000

#hockey imagines #allies writing #nhl fanfiction #hockey fanfiction #nhl imagines #hockey imagine #mat barzal x reader #mat barzal imagine #mat barzal fic #mat barzal fanfiction #mathew barzal imagine #mathew barzal x reader

[ashes-writing]

three stupid words | shameless ; l.gallagher

A/N ; I, uh... I dunno where this came from and more importantly, I do not know where this is going, if it's meant to be a one off thing with a fem!reader or there will be more in the future. But hey, it's here and I thought, ahhh.. why not.. i'll wake up and choose violence in the form of angst today. So here we fuckin go.

( By all means, if you guys want more to this pls... Encourage me and my fuckery. )

Pairing ; Lip Gallagher x Best Friend ! Fem reader.

Timeline / Other Stuff to Note ; This is set around the time that Karen was pregnant had Lip believing he was the father but the father turned out to be some other kid and they broke up. If I were to continue this, a lot of Lip's stuff on the show would arguably change. And I dunno that this would actually follow a lot of the canon plot or anything. So.. yeah.

Tag List ; There is nobody on my Shameless tag list. if you'd like to be added to my taglists for anything including Shameless, please let me know or add yourself -> here.

Warnings ; Angst. Friends to nothing to lovers. Alcohol + creepy asshole scenario mentioned, Kissing. Three stupid words. This one is tame.

Other Stuff ; tag list doc || my rules - fandoms and some characters I write for || requests are open (pls.. pls... send me things) but they're limited to headcanon asks + filth/fluff alphabet letters and I'm not accepting wrestling / wrestlers in my ask box. Any other fandom/character but wrestling that I happen to write for is fine and I beg of you -> send me things.

I do not consent to my work being reposted elsewhere or copied/reworked/rewritten and reposted here or elsewhere. You don't own this, I do. So like... don't steal my shit.

“And furthermore, Phillip,” you’ve got your hand on your hip, your chest is heaving and your nostrils are flared. All that’s missing is your hands gesturing wildly or the way you always seem to wind up invading each other’s personal space whenever you butt heads. It’s been like this since you were both around 6 and 7.

From the kitchen doorway, Fiona tries not to double over.

Lip takes a long sip from the bottle of beer he’s confiscated from Frank’s stash in the fridge. He’s calm. Smirking a little. “What, princess?”

Your nostrils flare just a little more. You step closer. “What did you just call me?”

“You heard me.” Lip smirks. Stepping closer to you. Vee, who has just wandered in and is observing this whole thing, nudges Fiona. “One day they’re gonna tie up and Lip’s going to kiss her to shut her up.”

Fiona laughs. “Nah. They’ll storm off like always. But she’s not wrong. She came by to check on him in the first place but naturally, he’s being a little bitch.”

“Not because of Karen.” Vee’s only half joking and at the mention of Karen’s name, Fiona rolls her eyes. Then she nods to you. “All she’s doing is telling my brother the truth.”

The two of them turn their attention back to the scene unfolding in front of them. By now, Lip’s back is against the door of the fridge and you’re listing off every single flaw Karen Jackson has one by one. You end with a breathy, “She’s a lying, cheating, selfish little slut, okay? I’m sorry you’re hurt, I really am. But we all tried to tell you there was a huge fucking chance the kid wasn’t even yours.”

To Fiona’s surprise, Lip hasn’t stormed off yet. And he seems to be taking it in. Staying calm. He takes a sip of the beer and drags the back of his hand over his mouth. “You about done, princess?”

You throw up your hands because you assume that nothing you’ve just said, not a damn word of it, has gotten through to the guy. “Yeah. I’m done. You accept the love you think you deserve, idiot. Think about it.”

Fiona and Vee share a puzzled look until something clicks for Vee and she gapes and promptly nudges Fiona. As she explains what she thinks you meant by the last comment you made before storming out the door of the Gallagher house, Fiona glances across the room at Lip. When she stops and really thinks about it, she’s not wrong. All the signs have always been there, Lip’s just been too blind to notice them.

Lip swings at the kitchen wall and then aggressively grabs his cigarettes and lighter before storming out to sit on the back stoop.

You stopped to take a few deep breaths, glancing back at the Gallagher house as you drag a hand through your hair. Your friends are right. Mandy was right. Maybe it’s just time to let the past -and your almost lifelong friendship with Lip Gallagher, go. Your next deep breath is shaky. You’re unsettled by what you’ve just realized. But you stand taller as if that’ll help somehow. As if it’ll make it easier to do what you’re about to try.

– ( almost three weeks later ; a block party in the South Side ) 

You haven’t spoken to Lip Gallagher in almost a whole month. It hasn’t been easy, especially given that Lip seems to linger, to pop up anywhere you happen to be. You weren’t planning to come out all day because of the block party going on in the streets down below, but Mandy Malkovich showed up with Ian Gallagher in tow and the two of them practically dragged you out of the house.

Now you’re out, wandering through the crowd. You’ve got a Seagram’s wine cooler in one hand and a bag of cotton candy you’re grazing on every so often in the other. You spot Lip up ahead and you immediately turn with every intention to walk away but when you turn, you find yourself body to body with an asshole named Henry who likes to pop up and corner you and every single time, it makes things uncomfortable ™ but Henry doesn’t seem to care.

You’ve got a bet going with Mandy about the jerk, he’s definitely in line to be the first incarnation of Ted Bundy or Richard Ramirez, there’s just something empty in his eyes that spooks you way too much. You gulp as Henry immediately pins you so that you don’t really have much of an escape, with your back against one of the local food trucks and his hips. As he opens his mouth to say something to you, the sour stench of beer and vomit makes you cringe hard and you roll your head away instinctively. You’re raising your knee when out of nowhere, something smashes against the back of Henry’s head and Henry slumps over.

Lip is standing there with the neck to the bottle he’s just broken over Henry’s head and he extends his leg, nudging the toe of falling apart Converses into Henry’s side and he does it hard. Then he leans down. “What’d I tell y’, huh? Leave her alone you fuckin fuck. I told y’ this was gonna happen next time you pulled your bullshit.”

You’ve done literally everything a girl can do to avoid Lip Gallagher at this point, even going as far as to find a whole new tutor and getting your schedule changed around at school just so you don’t go down any of the hallways Lip does.

That’s how serious you are about avoiding the guy. There’s no other choice but to avoid him because if you don’t, you’re going to lose your damn mind pining away while Lip chases whatever girl he’s putting up on a pedestal for the next few years til you can hopefully leave South Side behind.

You haven’t seen Lip in almost a month and somehow, seeing him right now has the exact effect you were afraid it would. Everything you feel comes rushing back all over again and there’s a tug at your heart, that empty space he occupied is gnawing at you now under the intent stare of glazed over baby blue eyes.

“I,uh.. Thank you.” you manage to get the words out and then you do the only thing you can in this situation. You bolt. You don’t run but you speedwalk away as fast as you can, putting a big chunk of drunken party goers between yourself and Lip.

Once you’re down by the corner store, you lean against the brick storefront and rest the back of your head against it as you take a few deep breaths and you fight like hell to keep from caving into the urge to go back to him and just… Pretend like nothing is wrong and your heart doesn’t break every single time he gets mixed up with a Karen or one of those preppy princess-y types he’s always oogling in the halls, the ones who only use him for his cock and then they’re done.

Because you can’t keep living like this.

And you’re so close, you’re almost free of the chokehold Lip Gallagher has on your heart.

– or you like to tell yourself you are. Deep down you know the truth and you know that you’ll probably never be free of it.

He’s shouting your name and somehow, he’s gotten both his brothers in on it too.

Ian knows you too well. So you’re not surprised when Ian finds you hiding out in the alley between the corner store and some old store with boarded up windows, smoking a cigarette as you finish off the Seagrams wine cooler you swiped from your mom’s fridge. 

“Just talk to him. C’mon..”

“Ian, I can’t.”

“But you can, though! This whole thing is driving him crazy, alright? I almost can’t live with the miserable prick lately.”

You bite your lip and take a deep breath. “Talkin’s not gonna do anything, Ian. Not when I’m the one with the problem. Look.. I love him. I can’t just sit here and watch him keep chasing the little princesses or the Karens and getting fucked over because it kind of physically hurts. He deserves better, I just.. I can’t deal with him until he finally realizes it.”

You don’t realize what you’ve just done until you hear the sound of glass shattering at the top of the alley. Your head snaps up and you find a very stunned Lip Gallagher standing there with his mouth open almost comically.

Ian goes to leave and you stand because this is not how you wanted things to come out. You’re in fight or flight mode, leaning heavier to flight. You never wanted anything you just admitted to Ian to come out of your mouth at all and yet, now it has. You know you need to run, to get the hell out of this.

Because let’s face it, Running is so much easier than standing here and dealing with the aftermath and the awkwardness you think you know will be coming.

“Ian, take a walk, buddy.” Lip fixes his gaze on his brother. Ian nods and the two share a look.

You go to leave with Ian but Lip’s arm shoots out, hand resting against the brick wall close to him for purchase. Forming a barrier so you can’t escape. “Where th’ hell do you think you’re goin, huh?”

“I-I..” you stammer around your words and finally shut your mouth because nothing is coming. 

For at least two or three minutes too long the air is heavy, filled with what you just confessed and a thousand other things unsaid that you’re a little too afraid to admit. You go to duck beneath his arm again but he refuses to budge. You glance up at him. “Lip, don’t.”

You tell him not to but deep down, you don’t mean it because you’re faced with losing him and now that you’re actually looking him in the eyes, you’re a little frantic. You don’t want it to happen.

But damn it, you can’t bite your tongue anymore, either.

“You’re avoidin me and I’m fucking tired of it, princess.” his eyes get a little stormy, they always do when he’s angry or upset, you know him like the back of your hand.

You place a hand palm flat against the front of his tee shirt when he steps closer just to keep a little space between the two of you because this is hard enough already and the closer he gets to you, the harder it’s going to be.

Blue eyes settle on the way your hand rests against his chest. Right over his heart.

But he doesn’t keep trying to get closer and invade your personal space. He takes a few shaky breaths instead. “What you said t’ Ian… Any of it true?”

You gulp.

“All of it.” you answer quietly, eyes trained on the word Fuck screenprinted on his shirt. You don’t dare make eye contact.

But Lip hates it when you won’t look at him, especially right now when he needs you to the most. All he wants to do is figure out why you’ve practically disappeared off the face of the Earth for the better part of three weeks because it bothers him because now he’s come to realize that he loves you and that seeing you around or hanging out -even when you wind up arguing, that was one of few things that kept him from clawing the walls.

So he grips your jaw and makes you look up at him. “I love you.”

You blink. This shocked haze settles over you and you’re barely listening to anything else he says because you’re still trying to process the first thing he says to you. Meanwhile, Lip has gotten desperate and this is what leads to him stepping up to you. Pushing you against the wall you’re both standing close to with his hips pinning yours flat as rough hands shakily skim your sides before squeezing your hips.

Your noses smash when he leans down and in towards you to kiss you and you pull away a little, holding your nose. Lip surveys your nose critically while muttering apologies over and over but then the words die away. And he’s focused again, he’s leaning in again with only one thought on his mind.

His mouth bumps yours clumsy and lazy and you’re about to pull back but you just…Can’t. Your mouth falls open ,welcoming the intrusion of his tongue as it drags over your teeth and massages yours and you feel yourself starting to come out of the daze just in time to realize what’s happening. His hand catches in your hair and he pulls your mouth in deeper, rough and thin fingers twisting and tugging at soft strands as he all but melts into you. You start to kiss back, you try to take dominance in the way your mouths meet but he’s quicker and he wants control more. You wind up wrapped around his body with your arms around his neck as your fingers rake his scalp and tug at curly hair before coming to a stop against the back of his neck. He shivers when you rub against him and melt into him just a little more and for a second or two, he nearly forgets to breathe.

The kiss finally breaks. His hand raises and it catches against the side of your face, his thumb dragging your cheek. “I’m sorry, I’m so fuckin sorry.”

“I’m sorry too. I just.. I couldn’t take it anymore, okay? Like..” you look down, you’re toying with the end of your shirt sleeve as it hangs over your finger because there’s a loose thread, “Even if you couldn’t… Love me… I couldn’t just sit back and keep quiet when you’re always letting yourself get hurt.”

“But I do love y’.” he answers quietly. He’s grabbing your face again, his forehead against yours with the warmth and the smell of cigarettes, beer and the fried pickles he ate earlier lingering on his breath, “I mean that. I always had, just..” he hesitates. Swallows hard. “You’re too fuckin good for me, princess.”

“Lip, don’t…” you take a deep breath. “Stop saying that!”

“It’s true.” he shrugs.

“It’s lies.” you pout up at him.

“Agree to disagree?” he questions and you both laugh quietly.

“C’mon. Let’s go lay under th’ tracks and watch the trains go over.” he mumbles with a laugh and then he takes off at a run with you and you’re clinging to him, laughing. Smiling.

Because maybe everybody’s wrong.

Maybe sometimes, there are reasonably happy endings. Maybe, you think to yourself, this can be one of them.

#lip gallagher #lip gallagher imagine #lip gallagher fanfiction #lip gallagher fanfic #lip gallagher oneshot #lip gallagher x best friend!fem reader #lip gallagher x you #lip gallagher x reader

[averyhotchner]

Avery's TopGun:Maverick recs pt.2

alrighty, almost 3 months later, here is my list of favourite TopGun: Maverick fics that no one asked for. like last time, it's mostly hangman, rooster and a bit of bobby boy. but i am slowly starting to fall for mickey and coyote.

please make sure to follow the age limit set by the writers!

jake "hangman" seresin

Fuck: The Universe (mini-series) by @roosterbruiser

okay maybe this is recency bias, because i did read this whole mini series yesterday and today, but still. it checks all the boxes, and of course i love the trope of jake is an ass to everyone but his girl, who also happens to be way better than him. also part 7 cracked me up.

real friends (series) by @starlightstories

i read real friends then found fuck: the universe, and i realized i really really really like the loverboy jake grumpy reader trope. i have no shame.

hey stupid, i love you (one shot) by @callsignseagull

okay this fic is very personal to me. i genuinely felt like the reader in this fic because i'm going through a very similar thing right now, and it tamed so many of my insecurities. i can't wait to reread soon!

loving you is... (series) by @demxters

guys frat hangman. that's all.

sleepy baby (series) by @discount-shades

the lengths at which this man goes just to find his princess, goals.

Where I'm From (one-shot) by @sometimes-i-write-good

sweet man jake, back at it again stealing hearts

Minimal Losses (series) by @ohtobeleah

this series and the rooster prequel NCIS ARE SO GOOD. im a sucker for this shit.

Sweet Nothings (series) by @sweetlittlegingy

yup! yup! yup! make sure you get your blood sugar checked before reading this because it's so damn sweeeeeet

Seeing Red (series) by @call-sign-jinx

picture this: its 2015, you're on wattpad and every single fic is a social media fic. but THIS? this is everything. the amount of work that goes into making a single text screenshot, not to mention the plot! its truly incredible and had be crying, laughing and sitting on the edge of my seat. i can't praise this series, and the other fics in this universe, enough.

yours (one-shot) by @theharddeck

this one... yeah its cute. but its down right sinful as well

bradley "rooster" bradshaw

I Will Always Love You (one-shot) by @amysteryspot

this one is short and sweet and honestly made me cry while eating my blt quarter pounder.

Pamper Night (on-shot) by @dagger-wren

okay this fic started as a cute little date night/self care night fic. BUT THEN, the ending had me falling in love with this dysfunctional squad. of course rooster and his girl are mom and dad, like who else.

Eat It, Twilight (one-shot) by @fandomxpreferences

okay i know this is a hangman fic, but i dont care. the rooster bff part was what i loved the most. also the plot is highlarious, and its probably because i was high when i read it, but still. chefs kiss.

Terms of Endearment (series) by @ohtobeleah

this series will be the death of me. each time a new chapter gets released im holding my breath on whether its gonna be all angst or all fluff. but either way i know its beautifully written.

And They Were Roommates (series) by @starryeyedstories

this. its hilarious and i cannot wait for more!

robert "bob" floyd

Christmas Gift (on-shot) by @call-sign-jinx

one of the most common bob fics i see is him with a teacher, and honestly i love it. who else would be as sweet and as patient as this man. i have the utmost respect for anyone who works in education, ESPECIALLY those who work with kids under 13. anyways, love this fic.

King of My Heart (one-shot) by @croimilis

dunk bob is the sweetest person ever!

Apple pie (mini-series) by @andorskenobi

the warning is very real, pls take it seriously <3

honorable mentions:

@sunlightmurdock @callsignvalley @toms-gf @make-me-imagine @callsignsaturn @madsnowstorm @jupitercomet @katsu28 @sehnsuchts-trunken @roosterforme (literally anything emily writes will be on a rec list i make)

i just wanna send my love to all the writers on this platform. whether you're just posting your first fic, or just finishing your 5th series, i appreciate you so much. i don't always have the time to comment and i'm dumb and don't understand how to reblog efficiently (working on it), but please know that all the effort and time you put in to making these works is truly admirable and i wish i was as talented as any of you.

okay thats all for now. i need to start making these more often cause theres so many i left out, i was just too lazy to scroll and find them.

#top gun maverick #hangman x reader #lt. bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #rooster x reader #jake seresin #jake seresin x reader #bob floyd #robert floyd #bob x reader #bradley bradshaw fanfiction #jake seresin fanfiction #jake seresin x y/n #jake hangman seresin #top gun imagine

[toxicsludgeyaoi]

Toxic Sludge Yuri Tournament: Submissions Open! Will close Feb. 14th (how romantic !!!)

I'm going to change up the banner and profile picture, among other things, for this blog but I figured I might as well start the submission process. Some rules and stuff that'd I'd really appreciate if you read before submitting:

Has to be WLW. It's Yuri guys

No antis pls. You all were so silly last tournament. Throwing up in my inbox only makes the ships stronger you know.

Can be from any kind of media. I will also accept submissions from problematic media, but I reserve the right to not include something for any reason.

No real people! No Taylor Swift x Katy Perry or whatever

If your ship is from a media with a lot of gore in it, please make sure the image you submit has minimal gore, especially if it's live action.

On the topic of images, I would prefer canon pictures but if there aren't any, feel free to send in fanart IF and only IF the artist consents to their work being used in this tournament, and you have proof that they know what their work is being used in and are fine with it. (Credit will, of course, be given in any post that uses the picture.)

Want your ship to get in, but you feel it's not popular enough? Make sure to write compelling propaganda ! Propaganda is a huge factor in who makes it to the bracket.

This tournament is capped at 64 participants. If we do not get 64 participants, we will do 32 with preliminaries if necessary. If we don't get 32, we'll do 16 and so on. However, we will do no more than 64.

This tournament focuses on toxic relationships. Your ship can be siblings or whatever, but that can't be the only thing going for it- they need to be super codependent, or try to kill each other, or something. So yeah, problematic ships are good, just make sure they're toxic too.

You can submit multiple ships, but please do not submit the same ship over and over.

I think that's it! Feel free to pop into my ask box if you have any further questions.

New here and want to see how the last tournament went? Here.

Tagging below:

@comshipbracket @toxichomestucktournament

Risking it all and tagging @tournament-announcer and @tournamentdirectory

#submissions form #toxic sludge yuri tournament #toxic sludge yuri #submissions #submissions open #link #google form link #tumblr tournament #poll tournament #tournament #not a poll #proship #proship safe #proshipping #toxic ships #toxic yuri #yuri

[deluluriddhi]

AYO YOU ALL!!!

I just noticed that the last one (my first requested one) got a lot of likes. Do you all want me to do more of these types? Please vote below and if any suggestions or requests go to my Ask box right away!

ANDDDDDDDDDDDD

Last night I got to know what a Anon is. So here Is a list of anon taglists!! Send me a message in my Ask box to tell me in which anon you wanna be in! Write your username + which anon pls!

⭐ Anon,

☕ Anon,

💝 Anon,

💌 Anon.

DON'T GO YET!! THERE'S MORE.

I got to know what taglists are too. So, Pin me in my Ask box to tell me in which post you wanna be tagged or in if there's any previous post or future (member's name) post you wanna be tagged in. Write your username + which post pls!

AND A BIG BIG THANK YOU TO ALL OF YOU FOR GIVE ME A SOLID ARMY OF 80 FOLLOWERS! I JUST LOVE YOU ALL GUYS SAUR MUCH!

When I first started this blog I NEVER EVER imagined to get so many likes and follows.

Thank you all again to keep sticking up to my once-a-week posts. Please keep supporting me till the end and Don't stop liking my posts, sending requests and following me.

LOVE YOU ALL💫 MWAH MWAH 💋🍓

- Riddhi 🍓

#deluluriddhi #enhypen #kpop smut #kpop hard hours #kpop hard thoughts #enhypen smut #enha smut #enhypen heeseung #enhypen jake #enhypen jake smut #enhypen sunghoon #enhypen scenarios #enhypen hard hours #enhypen jay hard hours #enhypen hard thoughts #kpop scenarios #enhypen x female reader #enha scenarios #enha smau #enhypen fanfiction #enha imagines #enha x reader #enha fluff

[fbfh]

rocks at your window pt. 12 - ricky bowen x reader

disclaimer: this series contains smut and chapter by chapter warnings, so as with all nsfw works, ricky is aged up to 18+!! ricky and reader are 18 and in their senior year. additionally, ricky begins to desplay more symptoms of mental illness and bpd but he does get therapy and has a good support system. Obviously I'm not a professional and this is for entertainment so while I have done my research pls take this with a grain of salt!! or several!! /lh

!! contains some spoilers for season 1 of hsmtmts, and previous chapters of this fic !!

wc: 5k

genre: mild hurt/lotta comfort, smut, feels

pairing: ricky bowen x (afab she/her) reader

warnings: post show depression, more backstory for reader, brief mentions of gifted kid burnout and rediscovering your love for theatre, more fake texts, ricky is down ba-a-a-a-ad, classic Hot Boy Climbing Through Your Window moment, heart to heart convos, smut, body worship, clit sucking n fingering, penetrative sex, emotional 'i love you' sex, ricky begging <3, possible cliff hanger?? (BUT NOT BAD I PROMISE)

summary: it's late at night and you're reflecting on your experience performing high school musical the musical with all your fellow wildcats when someone shows up, throwing rocks at your window, and thinking the exact same thing.

song recs: rocks - imagine dragons, end of all things - panic at the disco, I hear a symphony - cody fry, fuck it I love you - lana del rey, tell me that you love me - victorious cast, where do we go from here - amelie obc, I can't handle change - roar

a/n: this is the last chapter of rocks. I got so emotional writing this and I sincerely hope yall enjoy. also before anyone asks YES I'm planning a sequel about season 2 but it's curretnly tba. I hope you cry when you hear rocks by imagine dragons and get flustered as FUCK when you hear tell me that you love me by the victorious cast because Ricky Bowen needs to be told I love you to cum it's canon Tim Federle told me so. Fangz again to Cici for proof reading and fangz to you guys for reading <3 send in Ricky asks lol

tags @yesv01 @hopefullhearts @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @afidiofobia @aliyahsutherland @pikzel @demirunner @brinaslittlefreak @girlfriendwhoseawitch @matiere-detoiles @ifilwtmfc @uselesssapphickitten @nxstalgicnxbxdy @ggclarissa @n-slayaaaaa @stormi-ames @rainforest-daisies @sunshineangel-reads

The show is over, midterms are over, now it’s Friday night and you can’t sleep. It’s one of a handful of Fridays over the past few months that you haven’t spent at rehearsal, and no matter how many times they roll around, it still feels weird. You chalk it up to routine, muscle memory, but part of you still worries you’ll be late when you see it’s past 6pm. You miss the El Rey, you miss the auditorium and rehearsal room at school, you miss circle time with Miss Jenn and all your friends. Post show depression always sucks, but after everything that happened during High School Musical, how intense things got, the letdown is worse than usual. 

Even all the fun things Miss Jenn had planned to keep everyone’s spirits up until the next show gets announced are all over. You’d spent a week with your friends learning a song about winter Ashlyn wrote and Gina and Carlos choreographed so everyone could do a flashmob for the new East High theatre department’s instagram page. Miss Jenn got everyone together to make some content in advance to post before the break, but you finished your last take of the flashmob after school today. New Year’s isn’t until later this week, so you’ve finally reached the wasteland between closing one show and starting another. 

“Hey,” your mom says softly from your doorway, and you look up from where you’re sitting on your bed. You greet her quietly, flipping through your playbill from the show, still wearing your cast shirt. You have a few open hat boxes in front of you, adorned in light florals and other delicate patterns and designs. Each one of them is full to the brim with playbills, confetti, and other mementos from past shows, except the one in front of you, which still has some room left in it. 

Your mom walks over to you, watching your expression closely as you flip through your playbill, not wanting to put it away just yet. She rests her hand on your back, rubbing her thumb affectionately before tucking the tag of your shirt back into the neck. You both know what’s coming. You think back to the deal you made with her after your dad left. You didn’t realize until months after how much you’d been struggling with everything. Your mom discussed dropping out of the show you were in, even though you were so close to opening night, and you’d refused. You’re not the type to drop out of a show you’ve spent months rehearsing for just because of some struggles in your personal life. 

Your mom could see clear as day how you weren’t having fun like you used to, how burnt out you were going to get if you kept up like that. What kind of mother would she be if she just let you do that to yourself? Once you’d found a new house and a new job out in Utah, you came to the agreement that you’d take a break for the summer. After that, if you wanted to do theatre again, you could do a show at your new school - nothing high pressure, or competitive and catty, or overly professional. After that, if you still want to, you can return back to professional theatre after you graduate. 

“So?” she says softly. Your chest squeezes, and you’re so grateful that you’ve been able to feel and see and do and experience every single thing you love about theatre so much. There had been no high stakes, nothing riding on you and your ability to perform. It was just fun. Passion. A passion you don’t know if you’ll ever be able to let go of. 

“I want to do the next show.” You say, without a trace of reservation. She smiles softly, looking down at you. She hasn’t seen you like this, so much like yourself, in years. You’re glowing and at peace, and she has never, ever been happier to see it. After everything the two of you have been through, the divorce - and the events leading up to it - she remembers this is what she’s been fighting for, the goal she’s been working toward; seeing you happy and thriving. She had a hunch that high school theatre was exactly what you needed, and now she thanks her lucky stars she was right.  

You don’t talk about what you’re going to do after the next show, it’s not quite time to worry about that yet. There’s no need to rush anything, especially when it comes to stuff like this. You’re sure that when it comes time to make a decision, you’ll know in your heart what the right one will be. But even just from looking at you, even if you don’t know yet, your mom has another hunch that you’ll be back in New York, lighting up every stage on Broadway at some point. She presses a kiss to your forehead, rubbing your back again as you finally, reluctantly place your playbill in the open hat box in front of you. 

“Try to get some rest, sweetie.” 

She goes off to bed, and now you really have nothing to do. You sigh as you organize your hat boxes back on the top shelf of your closet, in the order you usually keep them in. You look around, deciding to clean your room. You run down to the kitchen to get a trash bag, then return to your room. You dig through all the scented candles you’ve been hoarding and pick out a nice smelling one to light, then put something on Netflix for some background noise. You start by folding your laundry, then pick up any stray trash. Usually cleaning your room gives you time to think, but you’re not really thinking much of anything now. You’re grateful for the break. 

You move from task to task, losing track of time as Netflix continues to autoplay. You pause what you’re doing for a second, trying to figure out why two characters are arguing. You’ve barely been paying attention, but are still managing to follow the plot for the most part. During that moment of stillness, you hear your phone buzz with a text. You pick it up, shocked at how late it is, how quickly the time got away from you. It also makes you wonder who could be texting you so late. It’s Ricky. That makes sense, you think. You wonder what he’s doing up so late as you open the message. 

You set your phone on the windowsill, then head towards your closet to try and make some sense of it. You’re not sure how it got to be such a hot mess - in all fairness, it’s not really that messy. You just need a project to work on. You straighten up your hanging clothes, refold all your jeans and folded sweaters, then reorganize it by color. Or maybe cut. You’re not sure yet. You make a mental note to rewatch Tidying Up with Marie Kondo later for more ideas. 

You decide to revisit that in a few minutes, instead turning to all the pillows and blankets hidden on the floor of your closet. You adjust them, remembering the first time you’d shown your nap hole to Ricky. Your mind wanders idly, recounting all the things that have happened since then. You really hope that in spite of everything, Ricky had a good time performing. A part of you really hopes he’s going to do more shows. He’s so talented, and he has so much natural potential. After what he’s been through, it would make total sense if he never wanted to do theatre again, but a part of you silently hopes that he’s grown to love it the way you do. 

Thunk. 

You turn your head suddenly, wondering if you’d imagined the small noise. You glance back at the window, and see you left your phone there. You figure it was a notification or something. When you press the power button to check, you’re met with the words no new notifications on your lock screen. 

Thunk.

Something moves in the corner of your vision, followed by another noise, then another.

Thunk- crack! 

Your brow furrows as you stare at the hairline fracture left in the glass of your window. You try to peer down, but it’s so dark you can’t really see anything. You open your window up wide, lifting the latch and popping out the screen. You lean your head out just enough to look down, but it’s still too dark. You turn on your phone flashlight and hold tight to your popsocket, angling the beam down, only to be met with Ricky. 

He’s holding a small plastic bag and a handful of rocks to throw until he gets your attention. He waves up at you awkwardly, and you laugh, covering your mouth to not make too much noise. It sounds beautiful. Everything you do is always so beautiful, he’s not sure why he’s still surprised when you take his breath away effortlessly. His stomach twists for a moment, and he hopes he gives you butterflies like you give him all the time. He looks up at you, and leaning down from your window like this, he thinks you’d make a really good Juliet. He’s not sure if you’ve done any Shakespeare before, but he makes a mental note to ask. 

You watch from above as he holds the plastic bag in his mouth and starts climbing up the tree next to your house. You lose sight of him for a moment, until he reappears on the lattice on the side of your house. He’s careful not to disturb the ivy slowly growing its way up in spite of the cold weather. You laugh in disbelief, watching him climb through your window until he’s standing in front of you. It feels like something out of a movie, and your heart is pounding in your chest. 

“You could have used the door…” you laugh. 

“Well,” he shrugs, “I wanted to shake it up a little.” He smiles at you, pulling something out of the bag. 

“I brought you coffee.” He pulls a to go cup out of the bag, handing it to you. He’s hopeful it will make you happy, and the way your eyes light up when you accept the drink is worth the stranger looks he got from the barista for ordering espresso at 11 at night. He takes out his drink, throwing the empty plastic bag in your garbage. You look up at him with those pretty eyes and his stomach flips. You move closer, pressing a kiss to his lips, one he leans into. 

“Thanks,” you say after pulling away, sending him the most blinding, dazzling smile. He’s been inside you more times than he can count, and your kisses still make his head all fuzzy. He lets out a soft laugh, feeling a little high from your attention. He sits on your bed, watching you as you sit backwards on your desk chair. You both sip your drinks, and it’s quiet for a moment. 

“Couldn’t sleep?” you ask. He lets out a breathy laugh, surprised at how well you can read him. 

“It… still feels weird not being at rehearsal.” he says, thinking out loud. You nod in silent understanding of everything left unsaid. You chuckle lightly.

“Yeah, post show depression will really kick your ass.” He laughs, feeling called out at your words. 

“Yeah…” he agrees. When Nini dumped him, he felt like there was a sinkhole in his chest. Then after that, when she left, when she just walked out on him and his dad, he felt like he was going to cave in. Then he met you. You didn’t make him stop missing her or Nini, but you gave him something to lean on. You helped him realize he had something else to think about - the show. Now he doesn’t think about Nini nearly as much as he used to; that wound is starting to heal. As for the other thing, long as he doesn’t let himself think about her or Todd, as long as he keeps moving, he’s sort of okay. 

But now he’s feeling a new kind of emptiness. He doesn’t like goodbyes, he never has, so even though he knew closing night would be hard, he didn’t expect it to hurt this much. He didn’t expect himself to grow so familiar with the soundtrack and the script, running lines and remembering blocking. He didn’t expect to miss being called Troy so much. 

“I didn’t ever expect to love theatre, or love you, as much as I do,” he muses. You glance down, face flushed from his words. He gives you butterflies so effortlessly, it’s really amazing. 

“I love you too,” you smile, taking another sip of your drink. He giggles - actually giggles - at your words. 

“So,” you continue, “you liked it? Doing the show, I mean. I know there were some ups and downs but-” 

“I loved it.”

He smiles, and you both laugh, light and bubbling over your shared adoration of each other and the experiences you just shared. 

"I really, really loved it." He breathes, distracted for a moment as he remembers it all. "I just… I didn't expect to be so sad after?" 

You spin a little in your seat, taking another sip as you listen. 

"Like, I spent so much time learning how to become Troy, learning all the lines and blocking and choreo and now I'm never going to get to do that again."

"Yeah," you agree, looking down. "I mean, that's the beauty of theatre; it's always fleeting, but there's always going to be another show."

You can see him soaking in your words, really letting them in. It doesn't mitigate his sadness, but you don't expect it to. You get up from where you’re spinning side to side on your desk chair and sit next to him on your bed, placing your coffee on the night table. You wrap your arm around him, resting your head on his shoulder. You don’t say anything, and you don’t need to. Your presence is more comforting than words could be. Maybe it’s the sweet smell of your peachy perfume, maybe it’s the way you’re so consistent in his life, but he’s reminded in a rush of the first night you spent together. Memories replay like flashbacks in his mind, and after a moment, he turns his head toward you. 

His face is so close to yours, and it’s obvious what he’s thinking from the bedroom eyes he’s giving you, flicking between yours and your lips. It happens so suddenly, your heart barely has time to pound before he’s pressing his lips to yours in a deep kiss. Ricky needs a distraction from the ache in his chest. He needs something else to do, something else to think about, something else that makes him happy. He can’t think of something better to focus on than you. He deepens the kiss as you hold on to him tight, loving the way you always melt under his touch. You sigh against him, giggling as he works your lips open, slipping his tongue into your mouth. 

He climbs on top of you as his hands move down. He takes his time, feeling you up, obsessing over every part of you until he gets to your thighs. He gropes your pretty thighs that he wants so badly to put his face between, not missing the way you were squirming a moment ago, already needy for some friction. He slots himself between your legs as he presses kisses into your neck, adoring the pretty sighs and noises you let out. He squeezes your thighs in his hands, before pulling you flat on your back with him hovering on top of you. The sudden change in position makes your heart race, and you can feel your cunt getting hot and puffy with arousal. The expression on your face makes it so worth it, he thinks, watching it grow even more flustered as he moves down. He pulls off your shirt and presses kisses between your tits. He plays with them, squeezing and running his thumbs over your hardened nipples in little circles. No matter how many times he sees them, it always feels like the first time, when all he could say was Wow. Oh my god. Wow. You let out a choked noise at the feeling, one he reciprocates, moaning into the soft flesh he has in his mouth.

“Fuck, Ricky…” you breathe, watching him closely as he moves down, trailing kisses along your stomach, squeezing your waist and hips, finally tugging off your bottoms. He trails his fingers over your panties for a moment, taking in how pretty they look on you, how much he loves to see that little wet spot growing bigger and bigger. He throbs as he takes them off, and you watch with wide eyes as he opens your legs a bit more. 

“There we go,” he says softly, and your pussy pulses in anticipation of his touch. He spreads you open, taking a moment to take in how pretty your pussy is, how nice you look all spread open for him like this. It’s a shorter moment than he would have liked, he just can’t resist you, he can’t wait to press soft kisses to your heat, to flick his tongue over your clit, to make you feel good. He won’t wait any longer, doing just that, listening to every noise that escapes your pretty lips like a breathtaking song. He traces a finger around your dripping hole, fluttering and desperate for contact. 

As he works his first finger in, he can't help but feel like he's home. You're so tight around just one finger, he wonders how you're always able to take all of him. The thought makes his stomach flutter with anticipation. He pumps his finger in and out gently, feeling you get wetter around him as you get used to the sensation. He continues licking and sucking on your clit, pulsing in his mouth, as he does. You taste amazing, and he wants more and more. 

"Fuck, Ricky…" you sigh, and it's like music to his ears. He pushes his second finger in, and moans against your clit as he feels your tight walls stretch and relax to accommodate him. You let out a sharp gasp, throbbing erratically against his tongue. He scissors his fingers, breath hitching as you stretch around him. 

“Oh my god,” you choke out in a breathy sigh, “Ricky…” 

He loses all his progress as you clamp around him, bucking into his mouth as you cum around his fingers. He pauses for a moment, dizzy from the sensation, that he did that to you, made you feel that good. You tug on his hair, and before you can even ask, he knows. You want more of him, want him inside you. He climbs up on top of you. You tear his clothes off, throwing them on the floor, not wanting to waste a moment. His cock throbs, almost painfully hard, and he can’t wait any longer. He needs to be inside you more than anything. He lets out a jagged sigh, pumping his cock in anticipation. He’s so ready, more ready than he’s ever been to be welcomed back into your wet, hot, tight embrace. 

He finally begins to nudge his cock inside you. He chokes at how easily it goes in, how you seem to pull him deeper and deeper inside you. You’re ready for him, even more so than usual from how hard he made you cum a few minutes before. He can feel you suck him up inside you, gripping and squeezing him just right. Each time you let him inside, each time you let him stretch out your perfect, dripping cunt, it always feels unimaginably better than the last. Every single time, he thinks that this, you, have to be the best he’ll ever have. And every single time, he’s right. You feel so good, so indescribably good, a part of him wants to cum right on the spot. 

“Fuck, I love you…” He chokes out, voice breathy. And he means it. God, does he mean it. He says it right as he pushes his cock inside you, filling you up in the most delicious way, knocking the breath out of your lungs in tandem. You try to say it back, you want to say it back, but his tongue is already shoved down your throat as he covers your mouth with deeper and deeper kisses. He’s insatiable, not ever getting as much of you as he needs to satisfy what he’s craving. 

He starts moving, unable to wait, unable to stop himself from pistoning his cock as deep inside you as he can get it. He drags his cock against your gummy walls, the friction already making you both dizzy. He keeps going, rutting his hips into yours, moaning into your mouth. He cages you in with his arms, resting his hands on your cheeks as he gazes into your eyes. He’s so in love with you, so fucking in love with you. You’re… his world. You’re his everything. Everything he does revolves around you; he’s not the main character in his story, you are. 

He would move mountains for you, overcome anything, travel any distance just for you, to be in your arms. He loves you so much it almost hurts, and he knows he’s never felt more relief than he did on opening night, when he finally, finally told you everything he feels for you. He was so sick of biting it back, of worrying about timing, if you would say it back, if he could even say it at all. He can’t remember ever being happier than he was when he finally said fuck it, and spilled his guts to you. Right here, right now, he can feel the little bulge he’s making in your tummy. He can feel where your bodies are touching and squishing together, and he can feel you wrap your legs around him to pull him even closer. He didn’t think he could be any more crazy over you than he already is, but all of this, all of you is driving him to even higher heights than he could imagine. 

It’s overwhelming, and he moans, long and low into your mouth. There’s no other way to express what you make him feel than through his beautiful moans, like music to your ears, or telling you that he loves you every chance he gets, with his last breath he’ll be telling you again and again. He presses kisses to your cheek, moving down to your neck, taking in your sweet scent. God, he doesn’t think he’s ever wanted anyone this badly. He doesn’t think he’s wanted anyone or anything as much as he wants you. He’s so attracted to you, drawn to you in an almost primal way that leaves him rutting his hips into yours, grinding into your clit to get as close as possible, moaning shamelessly into your neck. It sends jolts of electricity through you, lighting you up like a powergrid. 

His breath hits your skin in steady, warm puffs. He lets out another moan as you scratch your nails down his back. Your hand tangles in his hair and tugs it just right, making him throb inside you. He knows in this moment that no one can ever make him feel this good, no one else can do what you do to him. He can feel himself getting closer and closer as he sucks bruises into your neck, leaving constellations of love bites across your perfect skin. Even though he’s holding you as tight as he can, drawing noises out of you that no one else has had the privilege of hearing, and it makes his head spin, he needs more. 

He finally pulls away from your neck, resting his forehead against yours. You lean up to kiss him, and even though he’s aching for you, he doesn't kiss you. Not quite yet. Instead, he looks into your eyes so deeply, so intensely, with such a burning hunger that you feel like you’re being fused together. He’s still panting, this time your warm breaths fan over each other’s faces as he really soaks in everything about you, how pretty you look in his arms like this - and fuck, you’re pretty. 

“I’m close, peach,” he pants, sending even more heat to your core, making you squeeze around him as he presses a burning kiss to your lips; one you accept eagerly.  

“‘M so close,” he says again between kisses, “Can- fuck- can you say it for me? Can you tell me? Please, peach, I need to hear it, need to hear you say it…” he rambles, drunk on you and p=-

You’re trying your best, but it would be a lot easier if everything he was saying and doing didn’t render you breathless and unable to do anything but moan and writhe beneath him. 

“I love you, Ricky,” you choke out, desperate and sincere. You finally connect your lips, only for him to moan into your mouth. It’s loud and shameless and has you teetering on the precipice. “Love you so much, so fucking much,” you continue to babble as he buries his face in your neck, moaning so much he almost can’t register what you’re saying. He’s glad you’re saying it anyway. 

He can barely register how close he is before he cums. It’s hard and sudden, and he’s barely able to hear your sweet words over the blood pounding in his ears. You let out a noise he thought only existed in porn, following closely behind him. Your legs shake around him as you grab him as tight as you can, desperate for something to hold onto. You squeeze him in a vice grip as you let out the most beautiful whines and moans, and it’s enough to make him dizzy. Just your noises alone are almost enough to make him hard again - which he probably would be, if you hadn’t just milked his cock completely dry. You stay like that for a moment, letting yourself be filled up with him, letting himself be squeezed tight by your throbbing walls. He can feel your heartbeat in your soft cunt, and he lets out a shuddering sigh at the feeling. He mutters sweet nothings into your ear, rambling about every good thing he feels for you. He doesn’t think he could shut up if he tried - he usually can’t when it comes to you. He presses more and more kisses to your skin as you mutter sweet nothings back, rubbing your hand over the red marks you’d left on his back, playing with his hair. You take your time coming down from this, letting yourselves be right here and now, in each other’s arms. 

Eventually, he pulls out more reluctantly than he’s done anything. You manage to clean up enough to fall back into bed, into each other’s arms. In those few moments, you glance around at the several unfinished cleaning tasks you’d started earlier. You shrug them off, telling yourself you’ll finish them later. As you’re welcomed into Ricky’s warm embrace, you think this is way more fun than cleaning anyway. 

You settle into each other, getting comfortable as he holds you tight against his chest. You can feel the steady rise and fall of each other’s breathing, your heartbeats gradually slowing back down, the warmth pooling between you. In the quiet air surrounding you, you can feel the calm turn into a sort of melancholy. You trace your fingers over his skin as he takes solace in you. Everything about you is so comforting, he can’t deny that you’re what’s kept him as centered as he’s been able to be. 

“Where do we go from here?” he asks.

His voice is quiet, breaking ripples into the glassy silence surrounding you, but you can hear the emotion wavering through it. You’re quiet for a moment, considering. You’re not quite sure if he means him and you, him and his dad, or the next audition. It doesn’t matter, you realize, because you’ll have his back through all of it. And he’ll have yours. 

“I dunno,” you start gently, and he holds onto your words, cherishing them like heirlooms, “but I do know one thing. Miss Jenn is announcing the next show in a few days, on New Year’s Eve. So, we should probably start thinking about audition music.” 

Just the briefest mention of auditions has him smiling at the memories from a few months ago, bursting in late with his guitar. At the time, he had only ever expected to remember that audition as the day he won Nini back. He never could have predicted what a different, more significant weight that would hold for him now. The mention of New Year’s Eve brings something else to mind as well. 

“Ashlyn’s having a New Year’s party, right?” 

“Yes!” you exclaim softly, “I totally forgot about that…” 

Ricky traces his thumb over your cheek as you discuss carpools and if you should bring drinks or cupcakes. He never knew he could feel this way, this warm, just from listening to someone talk. He doesn’t know what happens next. He doesn’t know what’s going to change, but he thinks he can handle it if he has you. He’s so wrapped up in you, so invested in the quiet little conversation you’re now having about sheet music and party outfits that he doesn’t notice his phone buzzing in the pocket of his jeans, strewn across your floor. After a moment it lights up with a new notification. 

1 missed call from Dr. Robert (therapist)

1 new voicemail from Dr. Robert (therapist) 

#rocks at your window #ricky bowen x reader #hsmtmts ricky #ricky bowen #hsmtmts #hsmtmts x reader #is now a good time to remind yall that I love you guys?? #cause I do lol #<333 #also is anyone interested in a full rocks at your window playlist?? #I'm probs gonna make a masterpost with all the parts and add links to the chapters once they're all up #or like... any shoplook outfits I made for writing inspo #i am a polyvore bitch at heart #anyway let me know any bonus content you guys wanna see lol

[muzanswaifu]

Updates

Alright so I've got an update for you guys in terms of my writing progression and future ventures

In terms of requests, they are still going pretty slow but they're still going. I still have school going and have a part-time job now, so I don't have too much time for fics and only get a paragraph or so done everyday. outlines are pretty much done but the actual writing part is the hard part and that takes some time. I want these fics to be good so I don't wanna rush them out cuz the prompts deserve time.

But, I think I know a system that will keep both myself and you guys engaged while we wait so let me explain

Its going to essentially be a game for everyone to participate in, I am going to think of a fic idea, write the first few paragraphs, then at the end of that post will be a poll where you guys choose what the readers next action will (around 3 or 4 options). The poll for that will last a day and i will write the next section of the fic based on the winning option, then at the end of that resulting continuation there will be another poll where you guys choose what the reader will do. It will basically be a choose your own path except I am only doing one version based on the winners of the polls. After numerous polls of choices, I will determine when that fic is finished and combine all parts into a complete fic and upload that. So not only am i getting fics done in between requests, but you guys get to help me write them! The fics will also have smut in them obviously hehe

I already have the first prompt picked out for the first game, but if you guys have ideas for prompts - send them to @muzanswifey 's ask box. I am not guaranteeing that I will choose the one's you send me and Im not going to post the asks, but hey maybe Ill like your idea and use it. MY REQUESTS R STILL CLOSED. If you send me prompts, they should not be too specific since the audience will choose what happens next, therefore certain events are not guaranteed to happen. Also for the prompts - i would prefer they be... pretty dark. Darker themes are more exciting to vote for actions for lol

DON'T SEND THEM ON THIS ACCOUNTS ASKBOX PLS, send them to @muzanswifey

Anyway, that concludes the update, more to cum

#demon slayer #demon slayer smut #kny #kny smut #kimetsu no yaiba #kimetsu no yaiba smut #mha #mha smut #bnha #bnha smut #my hero academia #my hero academia smut #boku no hero academia #boku no hero academia smut #boku no hero smut #jjk #jjk smut #jujustu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen smut

[catgirl-yeji]

this shapeshifting vessel is a lie

hi and welcome to my corner of the internet. this blog is still under construction until I can add my about page ( did you know that you have to personally ask support to be allowed to use a page code with javascript in it? :)) well, you do now ) so beware of the construction tape!

I'm Autumn or Faon, I use they/them pronouns and I was born '95. ticked about all the boxes on the queer registration form and I'm currently in a queerplatonic poly relationship. central european & white. future linguistics student, and plant parent. I really adore vampires and I write original and fan fiction, as well as poetry. I speak german and english, and I'm studying french, korean, japanese and finnish. lover of bats, snakes, horsies, deer and cats, as well as sharks. 🦈 I sometimes draw cat ears or fangs onto idols and actors ( see: my icon ), if you'd like me to make you an icon, drop me a DM.

my hyperfixations and interests change over time — yes, mom, it was a phase! name a constant state of being, mom! — and I change my username every two or so years. currently I'm really into the quantum leap spin-off, the one piece live action show, and I'm watching a couple of k-dramas and such at the side. I play baldur's gate 3, vampyr and control, but also 2064: read only memories.

I was very active in the shadowhunters and the dragon age fandom as well an 00q shipper. I will reblog every single gif of spirit - stallion of the cimarron, it's my childhood movie;; also, Jin Oshiro from STRAY (2019) deserved better, thank you for your attention.

you may know me as leafmiilk, taehdenveri, fliederfuchs or thetevinterelf — and most recently @catboy-jaebeom ! 🌺

tumblr veteran and survivor of the mishapocalypse. I've been renting this space ( occupying, maybe, rather? skjsdlkgs it's not like I pay rent ) since 2012, and trust me when I say: this website is a hellsite, but it's our hellsite, so, I'll stay until the last person switches off the lights, probably. >< a lot of other social media networks just never grew on me quite like tumblr.

I have three sideblogs worth noting: @splittergheist, my writing blog where I post short stories and poems irregularly, and my secret and private miscecanis / omegaverse blog ( a lot more interested in the world-building, concept and lifestyle than the smut, but no hate! ) that I may give out if you ask nicely and privately. also, if you're interested in some tumblr rp, you can message me as well, I have an OC blog for that. 🐰

that said, I tag my posts extensively, so if you need me to tag something, you can shoot me an ask and I'll try to tag specific things for you! please be nice in my inbox or I'll simply delete your ask and block you. 💛 oftentimes I'll message you privately when you send me an ask that doesn't seem like it should be answered publicly ( unless you've sent it on anon ofc ) and while I do answer tag games, I'm too anxious to tag ppl myself unless we're like super close, sorry ><

I track #faon.tagged. if you make ( especially kpop ) content you think I'd like ( itzy, got7, nct & wayv but especially ten, xiaojun and yuta, red velvet, shinee, svt but especially joshua, mingyu and dk, skz but especially hyujin and felix, but also others! ) you can use this tag, I'm always happy to reblog pretty gifs and support you guys, you're the backbone of our and any community.

relevant kpop stuff can be found under the cut, as well as some 'reviews' my lovely mutuals wrote for me ( if you like to leave a review, hit me up in my DMs! ) thank u, ily 💚🌼

and thank you everyone else for reading this, may your days be bright, I think we could all use that at the moment;; I'd super love new ppl to talk to ( pls have your age or an approximate in your bio! while I'm fine with talking to minors, I'd like to know beforehand if I do ), so message me!!

kpop stuff

ult group: got7

other groups I like: nct 127, itzy, wayv, shinee, red velvet, seventeen, oneus, ...

soloists I adore: xia / kim junsu, taemin, ...

biases: lim jaebeom & choi youngjae; nakamoto yuta & xiaojun; kang seulgi; hwang yeji & lee chaeryeong; joshua hong & lee seokmin; choi minho & lee taemin; kim leedo & lee seoho; park seonghwa & jeong yunho; kanemoto yoshi; ...

wreckers: mark tuan & kim yugyeom; ten lee; kim mingyu & lee woozi; kang yeosang & song mingi; shin ryujin; ...

for as long as xitter still exists, I can be found under jaebueomgi.

blog reviews

@meant-to-be-a-hero wrote on november 22nd:

Shall I compare Autumn's blog to a summer's day? I shall not, because I am not a hack. Equal parts language jokes, kpop boys (and girls, but I don't look at those) and #bitter millennial blogging, there's something for everyone here at Autumn's blog. They are also one of the few people who still write funky things in the tags, a true dying breed on Tumblr. I feel like I'm reviewing a restaurant or something. Either way, click follow, thank me later, because you will. It's a good blog, Bront.

— ★★★★★(★★) [ 7 out of 5 ]

@klutenpetter wrote on november 22nd:

It seems I have misplaced the URL of the blog in question that I was supposed to review.

— ★★★★★ [ 5 out of 5 ]

#faon.own #faon.pinned

[mountinez]

💌Send this to the twelve nicest people you know or who seem to have a good heart and if you get five back you must be pretty awesome. 💌

When I say that I'm like Lady Gaga and want to shower you with: " talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before, unafraid to reference or not reference, put it in a blender..." except the last part I don't want to put you in a blender; you're too precious! You need to be kept somewhere safe and warm!

I don't think there's enough words in any human language that can describe how incredible you are. The way you think and express yourself is incomparable. I think you are a kind soul and the way you interact with others speaks volumes about your character and your kindness. I love the passion in which you speak, it doesn't matter if it's about F1, Football, neymessi, Brasil etc it's captivating bc how much you care! And I think I've seen you apologize a few times when you get in your feels and feel sad or bummed out about something,but I just wanted to let you know that there's nothing to apologize for 💚 the fact you feel so much is very beautiful and humane!

Also FNZHFXHFZFU dudeeee!! I love your analysis!!!! I eat those up like a box of cookies! I sent you the neymessi/kunessi ask and I can't wait for your response! (I mean it's oki if u dont tho! I know your inbox is blown like crazyy! Hahah) 💚

ok, i had to take a deep breath to answer this without crying.

literally what the fuck. you are so lovely, so kind to me in this. every single word here is like a hug :') i'm glad you don't think about putting me in a blender. i'm so tiny that i'd probably fit in those giant ones 😭 pls don't give anyone ideas. i'm fragile, haha!

but whats is not fragile is the love i feel right now. i feel my heart full with all this, and all i can think about is that i don't deserve all this kindness. anyways, i'm really so lucky to have met all of your guys;

talking about you, particularly. you are so amazing, i love your interactions and PLEASE your asks and the tiktoks you send me. it is like to have someone that really cares for everyone. you are important here for all of us. and please, you being this sweet and supportive towards me means the world :')

i wish i could be more present to everyone and make the life of each one of you better. y'all deserve it! you particularly deserves the world, bestie. thank u for so much love <3

(and pleaseeeee, i have that one saved on my drafts. i'll answer you for sure, don't worry! but it actually needs to be the perfect answer. wait for meee <3);

#kindness and love <3 #heart full <3

[capseycartwright]

Please let this Sleepover ask go through @ tumblr

I'm gonna have you do hot or not for some wrestling guys! And since media apparently was too much for your ask box to handle last time, you're only getting names. So:

Andrade el Idolo, Seth Rollins, Darby Allin, Kenny Omega

Sasha Banks, (Dr.) Britt Baker (DMD), Asuka, Toni Storm

hello frida i am glad this ask came through this time so here we GO

(frida has also sent me a carefully curated set of pics to judge from which i have pondered equally as carefully)

andrade el idolo, hot as HELL. i would let this man wreck my life and come back for more. 300/10

seth rollins. if he cut his hair he'd be hot. he's still hot to be fair, but loses points for the long hair but i think i could forgive it for one night. solid 8/10

darby allin. i would say its a not. he's not my type. gains back points for the abs in the pic u sent me though

kenny omega. no. no points. he looks like a republican, frida.

sasha banks. holy hell. i want her to crush my head between her thighs.

britt baker, ditto. she's hot and i'd like her to stamp on me.

asuka, also v hot, has fantastic hair in the pic u sent me.

toni storm. yes. i'd like to echo my previous crush my head between her thighs comment x 100000000. pls.

this has been a journey thank u frida

send me a sleepover saturday sunday ask

#in which i ramble #asks #leothil #frida tag

[onlyjaeyun]

hi my sweetest baby angel love🥹💓🌷 your replies to my asks made MY day even better and just reading those sweet words from you made me blush and kick my feet just like hoonie when jaeyun told him that yn was wearing the ring🤭

pls this new side of hoon is so so cute and the convo between him and yunie made me smile the entire time like they are the cutest platonic soulmate besties ever🥹🫶🏻 jaeyun is so fucking hilarious too like his comedic timing will never fail to make me laugh

also it’s not an onlyjaeyun fic if something major doesn’t happen at someone’s bday so i’m sooo ready to read what happens at won’s party👀👀 i need hoonyn to talk it out and heal not only theirs but also our broken hearts❤️‍🩹

omg a little update on the guy i’ve been spending time with, we had a little getaway with our friends a couple days ago and he was so sweet throughout our little holiday🥺 whenever we would go out to eat or something he always had his hand on my thigh and put food on my plate and also give me his jacket whenever he would notice i was getting cold like omg he makes me so 💓💗💘💕💖🩷💝 idk if i should bring up the “what are we?” talk bc although nothing is rlly official yet but how we are w/ each other is very much bf & gf just without the label so that’s what’s kind of having me on edge lately😭 i’m seeing him again tomorrow for brunch so idk we’ll see!

my baby doll zadie thank you for always making me smile and caring for me, i truly appreciate it so much🥹 i always want to be the same for you💗🧸 !! you deserve the world and more my love, pls take care of yourself! sending my love & a giant wave of kisses to you baby! 💋🩷🌷💖

- 💌

oh goodness my baby's ask has been burried all the way on the last spot of my i box and im SO sorry for being so late with my response angel love 🥺💞

firstly, thank you SO much for the love and support on cold hearts, you know your words means the world to me and ive missed talking to you so so much 😫😫

i cant wait for you guys to see more of that side of him tbh and i promise it's only one more angsty chapter and then its all love and fluff and just lots of cuteness 🤭🤭💞

omg omg omg that actually sounds super exciting babyc im so glad he's treating you well and thag you two get along so good, you deserve nothing but the best and i hope by now you guys have made things official 🤭🤭🤭💞

thank you so much for always checking in on me and giving me so much love, you truly are such a sweet soula nd im so grateful to have you 🥺💞💗💐

hope life's been treating you well baby, pls acceot all my kisses!💞💞💞

#; mailbox 📬

[ashes-writing]

just what i needed | stranger things ; t.hagan

A/N ;  This uh.. it may or may not have been a true labor of love for me -as is the one I have going for Billy, tbh. I started this telling myself that I probably wouldn't ever do anything with it and then an insane lack of reader fics for this goofy freckled bastard -and a burning desire to at very least fix friendships and meddle around with what could've been (in the case of tommy and billy and friendship) and yeah.. Here we are. I go into this fully aware that literally nobody asked for this and most likely, this will not be one of the series that a lot of people read, but.. I can't just not post it. I can't.

So, if you've been looking for a short lil Tommy x reader thing, here we are, babes.Sorry it's a reader insert, this just worked for me, idk.

Pairing ; Tommy Hagan x Good girl!Fem reader

Timeline / Other Stuff to Note ; this one is set around the point in season 2 when Tommy and Steve have their falling out. It's written under the pretense that Carol dumps Tommy for whatever reason and there will be so much billy and tommy friendship fuckery (Despite me own personal belief that Tommy loved both Steve and Billy but also wanting to like.. let other tommy fans insert themselves into the picture anyway..) There will be no upside down + it's unholy terrors here. Just the same as allll the others, this is a teen rom com / slice of life thing so there won't be anything but the normal here.

Tag List ; @musichealsscars is the only person on my stranger things tag list. I throw a tag out to @rampagewriting -bae, if this is not your cup of tea, you can totally skip this, it's fiiine. if you'd like to be added to my taglists for anything including fandom piece in question is for, please let me know or add yourself -> here.

Warnings ; Tommy coming to a lot of huge realizations. Underage drinking (and yes, a short drive bc this is the 80's) and a no parents house party situation. Lots of sexual tension, mentions of fuck marry kill being played, a very very drunk reader and a slightly less cocky version of Tommy bc he's going through a lot here and he's getting his head around it. Huuuge potential that Billy and Tommy are more than a little OOC here. I've been dying to write them but i miiight not be the best at it.

Other Stuff ; tag list doc || my rules - fandoms and some characters I write for || requests are open (pls.. pls... send me things) but they're limited to headcanon asks + filth/fluff alphabet letters and I'm not accepting wrestling / wrestlers in my ask box. Any other fandom/character but wrestling that I happen to write for is fine and I beg of you -> send me things.

I do not consent to my work being reposted elsewhere or copied/reworked/rewritten and reposted here or elsewhere. You don't own this, I do. So like... don't steal my shit.

“I think we need a break, Tommy.”

– when she said it, the first thing he thought was that she was just bored. She wanted to fool around with other guys and she’d come crawling back. That had been almost a month ago.

And so far? 

Carol Perkins hadn’t looked back a single time.

Tommy just wasn’t sure what exactly to do with himself. With Steve preoccupied with the situation with himself, Nance and Byers, Steve wasn’t in the right frame of mind to give him any real advice and they weren't talking anyway because they'd gotten into it for those exact reasons. Billy Hargrove turned out to be the one to notice his internal struggle.

Billy had taken him aside.

“Be dressed and ready at 8. You’re goin to Tina’s party with me tonight.”

Billy’s tone indicated clearly that he wasn’t fucking around.

So with the firm order, Tommy threw together a last ditch effort Halloween costume. A red bandana rolled and tied around his forehead. A sleeveless white tank top and some old oil-stained jeans he had lying around that had clearly seen better days. To give the outfit a little more realism, he even offered himself up to mow the lawn for his old man.

Around 7:45, he found himself standing in front of the mirror in his bedroom, the plastic Bowie knife strapped to his bicep. He laughed at how ridiculous it was, the idea that a stupid Halloween party was somehow going to fix the place his head was at lately. He knew it wouldn't, obviously. The problem was that this time, he just didn't know what the fuck to do to even begin fixing at least some of the problem.

He almost called Billy to call the whole thing off but right around the time he picked up the phone downstairs in the hall to do it, the loud rumble of the Camaro driven by Billy Hargrove came roaring up the street, an abrupt halt at the curb in front of the Hagan house.

Billy laid on the horn, half out the window, yelling out to him. “Get your ass in, Hagan. C’mon, we got shit to do.”

Tommy made his way down to the Camaro and got in on the passenger side. The drive was quiet at first. But Billy shattered the silence. “Remember my talk with Harrington? I’m gonna tell you the same thing so just fuckin listen, alright? Carol’s not worth it, man. Look, she was screwing around on you over the summer. You know it, I know it because you told me a thousand times. You weren’t really that happy either and she kinda treated you like shit, Hagan.”

“Yeah,yeah.” -but it’s hard to let go of an old habit and essentially, that was the perfect description of his relationship with Carol Perkins since as far back as 7th grade. The more he thought about it lately, the harder it was to remember why he’d even liked her in the first place.

She was blunt, rude, definitely spoiled. And while he always took up for her, she never seemed willing to do the same for him. They spent nearly all their time arguing -that is when they weren’t fucking at his house or hers or in his backseat.

Steve might have been onto something when he broke away from their usual girls.

Granted, he’d picked the worst one possible to experiment breaking away with, but  the fact remained… Steve did seem more at ease now that he wasn’t just amassing himself a body count.

“There are other girls out there, man. There’s other fish in the sea.” Billy said it with a shrug as he exhaled smoke and took the last drag of his cigarette. “Tonight, you’re gonna see that. You’re gonna see I’m right.”

Tommy laughed. “Doubtful, but whatever.”

Billy rolled his eyes. For whatever reason, Tommy felt the need to elaborate. “Girls don’t date the sidekick, Hargrove. They date, well… You or Steve. Not me.” Tommy said it with absolutely none of the bitterness or the jealousy this fact made him feel, just flat. As if it were something he’d come to accept. 

“I’m gonna smash your fuckin head against a wall, idiot.” Billy rolled his eyes. “Look. You’re not just the fuckin sidekick. You’re probably one of few actual friends I’ve got here. This is for your own good, man.” Billy’s Camaro pulls to a stop behind a red Mustang fastback that Tommy’s seen around the Hawkins High parking lot a time or two but never really bothered to pay attention to. When he caught sight of the license plate, he snickered to himself and nudged Billy, nodding to it. “TOOFAST, huh?”

Billy rolled his eyes. “Please. It’s Ford. The only thing it’s too much of is a pain in the ass when it breaks down on the side of the road. Ya know,” he rubs his chin and chuckles, “The driver’s this real cute little thing. Shy as hell, man. Her brother gave her the car.”

Billy could have told him that the driver in question was the same girl that had him stopping midsentence when he popped into the class BIlly just happened to have with her, but Billy wasn't about to do that, oh no. Where was the fun in doing that?

Tommy’s brow quirked. “A girl drives that.”

“Mhm. Like a little old lady out for Sunday brunch, but she drives it.” Billy laughs from the front step of Tina’s house as he looks back at Tommy who is still admiring the car. Tommy shrugs. “Not bad.. For a Ford, I mean. It’s red.”

Inside the crowded house party, you dangled your keys in your hands while nursing a heavily spiked cup of punch and somehow, wishing it was stronger. Parties were not your thing. People -especially the viper pit known as the cool kids at Hawkins High, were even less your thing. You only tolerated Hargrove because he wasn’t fake like the rest of the ‘cool kids’. And he knew your older brother, so you kind of had to tolerate him at this point. And maybe at some point, tolerance turned to an odd sort of friendship, and that odd friendship was the reason you were even here tonight. Sneaking out to a party which was not something you'd normally do. Neither was drinking but.. It was taking the edge off.

It was Billy’s idea to talk you into coming out to this alcohol fuelled open grope fest.

But you were annoyed. It was too loud. Too cramped. Just too much.

And Billy, the asshole responsible for talking you into sneaking out tonight, well.. He was running late as usual.

“Five more minutes. If he’s not here in five more minutes, I’m out.” you say it to yourself as you slam back the contents of the red plastic cup in your hand. You make your way into the kitchen. There are a few people in there but not as many as the living room or out back where the keg is set up, waiting to be tapped.

Madonna gives way to Ballroom Blitz and you bounce around on your feet a little, grinning.

 At least this isn’t more of that shitty pop music Tina and Carol have been playing on a heavy rotation all night. At least it’s… something.

You’re swaying your hips to the music as you dance around the kitchen, opening cabinets and just being nosey overall. When your eyes light on the bottle of vodka, you raise a hand and giggle. “This oughta numb the stupidity my eyes are beholden right now.” you muse as you scramble up onto the counter and grab for the bottle.

You’ve just uncapped it and taken a huge sip when your best friend Layla wanders in and gapes. Not only are you at Tina’s stupid party, you’re drinking vodka straight from the bottle. She nods to the bottle in your hand. “Pace yourself, lightweight.”

“Oh my god, fuck off, Lay.” you laugh a little. Your eyes flit around, taking in the drunken mass of teenagers at varying stages of drink or fuck. All that’s missing is a brawl. And you laugh as soon as that thought comes because with Billy supposedly coming out tonight, that’s a very real possibility.

“Is he here?”

“Who?” you answer, taking another sip. The burn of the vodka is starting to lessen. It’s starting to go down a lot smoother now.

This probably should’ve been your warning to stop but sadly, it won’t be.

“Billy! You’re the one who’s friends with him, God knows how that one got started..” Layla has that dreamy look. The one she always gets right before she does something so stupid it’s almost incomprehensible. It usually ends with her, crying in her room -or yours, while she talks about boys being dogs and insisting they don’t want anything but sex.

“Hey!” you pout and you find yourself glancing around. Billy isn’t here. But to be fair, Billy isn’t exactly the person you’re looking for right now, either. No, the guy you’re looking for is Tommy Hagan and the fact that you can’t seem to stop yourself from searching for him in a crowd frustrates you to no end.

Layla’s still going on and on about how neat it must be to be partially in-crowd when you zone back into the present and out of your daze. You laugh hysterically because it’s just not true. 

They’re royalty -supposedly, and you’re just.. Not.

You’re the quiet one. The awkward one. The girl who doesn’t really do well with others. People always assume you’re a sweetheart -and you are, but.. This comes with the nifty little annoyance that they also feel like they can just plow right over anything you say or any boundaries you set. And if it weren’t so damned hard to just speak up, to just let yourself get good and angry like you want to sometimes, if you had the spine to stand up for yourself, they’d find out real quick that you’re not the girl to mess with.

“Oh my god, did you see who Carol is here with?” Layla finally changes the subject. At the mention of Carol Perkins, you roll your eyes. “Nope.” the p lingers as you say it. Calmly raising the bottle of vodka to your lips to take another long pull. “Don’t really care, either.”

“Ben! She’s here with Ben.”

“So?” you shrug. It did sting a little, knowing the queen bitch of Hawkins High was at Tina’s Halloween party with your latest ex, the one who dumped you because you were “too boring.” Which was bullshit, it was guy code for “won’t just crawl into my backseat willingly.”. 

But then the stray thought crept in. Tit for tat.

You are real quick to shove this out. As if Tommy Hagan, with beautiful eyes and goofy smile -and admittedly, not a working brain cell in his head, bless his heart, and those goddamn freckles and that fucking dry sense of humor.. As if Tommy Hagan would ever look twice at you.

“So? You’re not upset?”

“She can fuckin have him, honestly.” you shrug and laugh as you take another sip, “And he can take a flying fuck on a rolling donut.” your words slur just a little and at the two times you say fuck in the same sentence, Layla glances from you to the bottle in your hand and she just laughs.

“Hey… Let’s get Isla and Dot… Maybe we can play a little Kill,Fuck,Marry or somethin.. Maybe make this bullshit party at least a little fun for us, the peasants.”

You shrug.

On cue, Isla rushes in and she’s all laughter and trying to grab you both to kiss your cheeks. She absolutely reeks of alcohol and she’s probably a good two of three sheets to the wind. Dot wanders in behind her, a cup of punch raised to her lips.

“Did you see who your ex is here with? He downgraded, girl. He downgraded so bad.”

You roll your eyes and shake your head no while shrugging. “Layla already told me and honestly, I don’t fucking care. Ben can go fuck himself.”

Dot blinks. Then she sees the bottle in your hand and she giggles. “Oh.” she laughs out. “Oh… so you’re actually letting the sassy side out to play tonight, hm? This can be fun.”

“Or it’ll be a complete fucking disaster, either way. I’m here. So.. are we playin or not?” you hop up to sit on the counter. There’s a radio sitting beside you and mostly to combat the pop bullshit in the living room, you turn it on and flip through the stations until you find your preferred one. 

After a little tuning -and a giggly smack to the back of the radio, Steveie Nicks  just barely picks up and you hum along with Dreams as you work the heeled boot off of one of your feet with the other. It’s just now that Isla seems to notice your lack of a costume.

“This is a costume party. I thought you were the living embodiment of spooky, bitch?”

You shrug. And with a roll of your eyes, you brandish the stupid cat headband you’d picked up last minute at the general store in town. “I wasn’t planning on coming here but somebody insisted.” you drawl out, laughing. “And then, naturally, the asshole is late.”

Isla and Dot share a look and Layla fills them in. “Billy.”

Their eyes light up and you roll your eyes. “Oh no. Nope. Absolutely fuckin not, alright? Look. he’s my friend and all but I can tell you with absolute certainty that he is… Not lookin.”

They all pout in unison. Layla slips up onto the kitchen island to sit and Isla hops up onto the counter next to you. Dot grabs a dining chair and drags it over, turning it so the back of the chair is pushing up her tits because of course she is, she’s also wearing a low cut pirate dress.

“Okay, when we left off last weekend in Kasey’s treehouse, it was your turn.” Layla smirks at you as she makes grabby hands at the bottle of vodka. You take a few sips and grimace. The burn is dull, but every other sip or two it sneaks back around to surprise you. You can feel it working, you’re lightheaded. Lightheaded and you can’t stop laughing.

Or saying wildly inappropriate things, as you’re just about to find out.

“Okay,” Layla is glancing at you with a wicked gleam in her eyes, “Kill, Fuck Marry… Steve Harrington, Ben or…” she glances around and rubs her chin thoughtfully as her eyes settle on someone just outside the room. “Tommy Hagan.”

You scowl and flip her off, laughing.

“Oh god.. Ben’s dead. And I’m reversing the damn car to make sure he doesn’t come back. Steve is.. Out entirely because honestly, he’s so…” you rub the bridge of your nose as you try to think of a word to fit the way you feel, your eyes brightening when you come up with the perfect one, “over-rated. Yeah.. yeah, that’s the word I’m lookin for.”

“You can’t–” Isla and Dot are about to argue that you can’t place one person into two categories but Layla shushes them. You don’t notice it, you’re swinging your bare legs against the cabinet below the counter you sit atop as you stare at the red polish on your toes, but Layla nods to Tommy, who just happens to be standing right outside the kitchen with an almost comical look of shock and awe on his face, at least a little invested with this little game of hypotheticals.

After all, how can he not be? His name was mentioned.

He’s hanging around because his name is the only one left. And the realization that this means for once, he’s been chosen.. Noticed.

And the fact that it’s you, well..

The poor guy is struggling heavily inside himself right now. But he’s listening because he just needs to hear you say it. There has to be a reason.

“We’re waiting.” Layla clears her throat.

You shotgun a generous sip from the bottle in your hand and pass it to Isla when she nudges you and nods to it. You burp and then you laugh, a snort coming that makes your three friends double over.

“Wait, whoa.. Let me get this right.. You can pick between Steve Harrington and Tommy Hagan and you’re picking.. Him..” Isla wrinkles her nose as it sinks in. “Okay, I’ll bite. Why?” she hands the bottle back to you. Dot reaches for it and you lean out and nearly faceplant the damned kitchen floor in the process and you would have if Isla hadn’t grabbed you by the arm to pull you back. You’re laughing as you lean your head back against the cabinet behind you. “Y-you asked for it.”

“Well?” Layla taps her wrist and she’s barely hiding a smirk. Tommy is frozen in the doorway, watching you like a hawk. Like it’s the first time he’s ever seen you before and he’s absolutely fucking… smitten. And Layla knows he’s standing there, she could easily tell you he’s standing there but honestly, she’s figured out a long time ago that you might or might not have just the teeniest crush on the guy. And she knows you’ll never say it without a little push. And a lot of liquid courage.

“Ugh, fiiine.” you raise the bottle to your lips. When the radio at your side starts playing Careless Whisper, you glare at it and flip it off. “Ew, fuck.” you grumble.

You’re stalling, of course.

“First of all,” you speak up after things have settled down a little. “Carol Perkins was fuckin lucky to have him, okay? Lucky. All the shit he put up with outta her and he protected her and stood up for her? Marriage material, bitches. Like seriously, just ugh…. Watching him stand up to somebody for her used to get me so damn hot. He deserves better, y’know. I mean, shiiiit.. Anybody is better than Carol no tits to speak of  Perkins…” you turn the cat ears over in your hand thoughtfully. Then after a second or two, you slip it onto your head. Crooked, but of course it is.

You’re laughing again, that same dreamlike look on your own face that you were taunting Layla for when it came to Billy Hargrove earlier. You sigh. “As far as the fuck verdict. Listen, if I’m going to..” you’re hiccupping and as you do it, you frown at yourself and a hand raises to your lips as if to stop the soft sounds. You’re not a drinker, not by any stretch.

Outside the kitchen, Billy’s noticed Tommy lingering. Watching you. He smirks to himself. He’d known it the second he got to know you somehow. Tommy Hagan would absolutely eat up the whole cute and quiet little thing you normally have going on. And when he got to really know you and realized that you have this sass, this fire that you keep hidden… Oh god.

It was the whole reason he dragged Tommy out to this party. Well, that and the fact that Tommy had to come into the class you have with Billy earlier in the afternoon before he asked you to come and when Tommy walked in, Billy couldn’t help but notice the goofy little smile. Or the way you were flushed and flustered to a point where you dropped your pen at least three damn times while staring and trying to make it seem as if you weren’t.

Oh and, he’d also noticed Tommy doing his own fair bit of sharing when you weren’t looking, when you had your nose buried in the magazine you’d stashed inside your textbook while you pretended to pay attention.

This needed to happen.

So when he hears the topic being discussed, he can’t help but chuckle and nudge Tommy. “I’m gonna go make my rounds, Hagan. Kegstands later, right?”

Tommy nods.

Fixes his focus back on you. Waiting. His heart is beating so loud he can feel and hear it in his ears.

And inside the kitchen, you speak up, digging the hole for yourself even deeper when you do it.

“Have you seen his hands? Y’know what they say about a boy with big hands or big feet…” you’re especially giggly at the thought, your skin burning hot all over, but you’re only going to keep talking. Keep digging yourself down deeper into a hole you don’t even realize you’re digging yourself currently. “All I’m saying is if I’m actually going to give up my virginity, I wanna be with somebody who knows what the fuck he’s doing. I just.. Look, you three can stop fuckin lookin at me like that, “ you pout, your voice a soft and lazy drawl because the combination of the alcohol coursing your system at the moment and just the… Thought.. Of the things you’d let Tommy Hagan do to you that you’ve kept hidden all this time, well.

You’re in a daze.

“I’m not like you, damn it. I can’t just hop in a backseat and just get it over with. I kinda..” you’re fidgeting with the sleeve of the flannel shirt you were wearing over the thin little dress you’d thrown on to wear for the night, “I want it to mean something and like.. I’ve liked him forever now, oh my god. The short answer here is Tommy fucking Hagan can absolutely wreck me, alright? Just.. yes.. Yes..” 

“Wait..” Isla gazes at you. “Was he?” she trails off, shaking her head. A little stunned because for some strange reason, she’d had the feeling it was somebody else entirely. 

Dot laughs and asks quietly, “So the guy you wrote all that stuff about for creative writing. The little shorts and the poems that had the goddamn teacher so flushed she couldn’t even read it out loud like she said she planned on doing to all of us last year…” Dot swings her feet and reaches out for the bottle as The Chain comes on the radio and you start to sing along, sighing as you shrug. “Yeah. They were about him, alright? Don’t start your shit with me, damn it. I know it’s stupid and I know I’m a sap. I don’t care.” you take the bottle back from Dot, leaning out too far again and laughing about it through a wild mess of hair as it swings down in front of you, your palms flat against the countertop to catch yourself.

When you sit back up and at least make an attempt to do something with your hair and the headband, you’re still hiccupping, laughing and your hand raises to your mouth.

“She’s soooo fucking drunk right now.” Layla laughs when she says it, giving you a little grimace.

“Girl? Are you gonna be okay?” Dot asks, snickering quietly.

“Oh sweetie.” Isla winces as she thinks about the headache you’re going to have in the morning and slips an arm around your shoulders to pull you into her side, “Your hair is gonna hurt. That’s how bad your hangover is gonna be.”

Your eyes widen, you’re starting to realize that you are well beyond the level of tipsy you set out for and you are now blitzed. Blitzed as in you’re suddenly not entirely sure if you’re walking out of the party later or you’ll wind up finding some way to con your older brother’s best friend Billy to carry you.

Layla clears her throat. “I’m going for a smoke.”

“Me too.” Dot and Isla chorus. You almost say you’ll go too because shit, why not… you’re trying out the drinking and the stupid cliche house party, the sneaking out of your house bullshit that nearly got your ass broken when you underestimated exactly how much weight the trellis by your window could hold safely.

You almost go bopping right outside with your three best friends, but.. You’re not about to try to get off the counter and fall straight down to the floor and kiss the tiles.

“The floor is lava?” you question, palming your face and leaning your head back against the cabinet behind it as Layla, Dot and Isla leave the room. When the local pop station starts to dominate the airwaves and your chosen channel is nothing but a faint ghost in the background, you scowl at the radio and reach out, snatching the cord from the plug in.

Billy makes his way in. His brow raised at you. “Are you drunk right now, pint size?” he’s barely hiding laughter in the teasing accusatory tone he takes. You’re laughing to yourself and you hold a finger up to your lips. “Shhhhhhhhh!” you look around as if any second, somebody will pop out and you’ll be in trouble for drinking.

Billy plugs the radio back in but you glare at him. You shake your head. “Too loud.”

He chuckles to himself. “Why are you sitting on the counter when there are chairs, hm?”

“The floor is lava. It’s lava, Billy.”

“The floor is lava.” Billy’s trying not to howl in laughter and in effort to hold back, he’s nearly shaking.

Sweet Caroline comes on the radio and if Billy only suspected you were totally off the tits drunk before, he gets his biggest confirmation when instead of ba ba ba you find it hilarious to yell out fuck fuck fuck.

Loud. Louder than he’s ever heard you be before. And this includes all the times he was present at your place when you’ve chased your older brother down while yelling at him about eating your ice cream or leaving the toilet seat up or using your fancy conditioner because he likes the way it makes his hair soft. Billy wasn’t entirely sure you possessed the  vocal range you’ve just demonstrated until now, truth be told. And that thought has him laughing. Grinning in amusement.

Tommy is going to eat this shit right up. Guy has a bit of a protector kind of bend to him and Billy knows with no doubt that he has to go through with his plan now.

“Jesus christ.” he rubs his forehead. Then he catches sight of the bottle of vodka sitting at your side and he yanks it away. “Give me that shit! No wonder you’re fuckin drunk. How in the hell did you find vodka?”

You reach up and tap the cabinet door while snickering. “Climbed my ass up and got it, duh.” you stick out your tongue.

“I can’t right now, I fucking can’t. I’m gonna.. Let me go find you a babysitter, alright?” Billy gazes at you in concern. You’re one of the few people aside from Tommy he actually considers a friend and given that your older brother is one of the few best friends he has in this pissant little town he’s been plopped into, he feels like it’s kind of his duty to look after you.

It’s a task he’s about to relegate to Hagan’s quietly lurking ass. Because you’ve just gift wrapped yourself with a shiny red bow and suddenly, Billy Hargrove knows exactly how he’ll go about casually nudging you and Tommy Hagan together.

“Hagan! Yo! Tommy! C’mere, man!” Billy’s whistle draws Tommy out of hiding where he’d been sitting in the hallway just replaying your confession over and over again because his brain wouldn’t let him let go of it.

Tommy can’t help but laugh when he sees you, swinging bare feet off the edge of the counter and the cat ears perched on your head are crooked, sagging as if at any second they’ll just fall right off. 

“Yeah?” he finally manages to say something but he can’t stop staring at you and he hasn’t yet.

“Pint size says the floor is lava and she won’t get down, buddy.” Billy nods to your perch on the counter. Tommy drags a hand over his hair. When you hiccup a few times and you start giggling, Tommy feels a smile start to creep to his lips. It’s something he hasn’t really done a lot lately.

“The floor is lava, huh?” Tommy eyes you in concern. Swallowing hard when you’re staring right back at him. Everything you said about him comes rushing back and he tries to pull himself together. But he knows beyond all doubt that tonight only ends one way. He’s determined to get closer to you. Actually get to know you.

Because somehow, he knows that he’s fucked. If he tries to ignore what he knows it’s just going to keep popping up. And hearing you say everything you did earlier, everything he’s always wanted to hear, it’s just… He can’t just let you -or whatever this could turn into, slip through his fingers.

For as mouthy and vocal as you were when it was just you and the girls a few minutes before, you’ve clammed up again. It always happens around him and you feel like maybe it comes out as you being indifferent to him when the truth is, the way he makes you feel overwhelms you most of the time.

You manage a nod though, and Billy clears his throat. “ You’ve got this, right, Hagan?”

Tommy laughs quietly. “Yeah.”

“Awesome. I told some of the guys I’d go pick up some more alcohol. While I”m out I’ll find that one’s brother and let ‘im know he's gotta pick up his car.. Got it?” Billy is firm when he says it but Tommy agrees with no hesitation and then Billy is  gone in the blink of an eye and this leaves you in the kitchen of Tina’s parents house all alone with Tommy.

“C’mere.” Tommy steps closer. Your heart does that stupid lazy little flip. The one you always get annoyed with yourself over when it happens. Your filter is gone right now though, so when he beckons you closer, you lean in. Against him a little because you don’t trust your sense of balance and the room is spinning all around you.

“You’re not a drinker, huh?” Tommy questions.

You shake your head. Laughter bubbling out. You’re not sure what to do with your hands and he’s so fucking close to you that for some odd reason, the idea that comes first is to grab hold of the front of the dingy white tank top he’s wearing and just kind of melt against him. “Too much potato juice.” your voice is muffled and soft and Tommy barely manages to make out what you’ve said but then he spots the half empty bottle of vodka you’ve been slamming most of the night that Billy put out of your reach on the space between the top cabinets and the ceiling and he grimaces.

“Ouch. Yeah, that’ll hurt in the morning, princess.” Tommy’s staring again. First your eyes but then his gaze shifts down. Settles on your lips. They look so fucking soft. And you smell like apples and cinnamon candy, the realization comes when he finally just can’t fucking take it anymore and winds up putting his nose against the top of your head. The tension in the taller boy’s frame just kind of melts away, all the anger and the stress he’s been carrying around because Steve’s awol lately and then Carol decided to abandon ship too, it all just kind of  vanishes.

Your legs wind up around his waist and you breathe in deep. Because he smells like cologne and cigarettes, the cheap beer he’s been nursing all night and for some reason, fresh mown grass. It’s a combination that’s odd and somehow, it’s relaxing. “Oh man,” you hiccup out as you take a deep breath or two, “I-I’m g-gonna be i-in s-serious shit, for sure. Deeeep shit.”

Tommy gingerly grips your chin to make you look up at him. “Yeah?” he questions softly. “Why’s that, hm?”

Your hand goes to your mouth and you giggle. He reaches up to lower your hand and you answer, explaining that not only have you never really been a big drinker, you also snuck out of your parents house tonight to even come to this stupid party. And then Tommy realizes that when Billy tore off earlier it's because Billy had a plan in mind. You tell him that Billy conned him into coming to the stupid party in the first place.

At first, Tommy’s a little jealous. But then he thinks about the whole ‘other fish’ speech in the car on the way over. Billy’s not the most subtle. He kind of hinted around about you at one point, bringing up the fact that he caught you staring when he had to come into the class you’re in with Billy earlier in the day to get something he’d left in Billy’s Camaro.

And it hits him. Billy dragged him out to the party tonight because the shithead was going to play cupid. Or try to. And Tommy’s laughing to himself because it’s in that moment, something clicks  for him further.

Billy, a Camaro driving badass that everybody’s scared shitless to cross.. Billy actually does really consider him a friend. He’s not just a sidekick.

He’s not a sidekick and he was chosen. Noticed by a girl. You didn’t notice Billy or Steve, you noticed him. You wanted him. And Billy actually valued his friendship because Billy tended to keep a distance and not get personally involved in other people’s shit otherwise, he knew Billy Hargrove well enough at this point to know that. And yet, Tommy thinks with a genuine smile, he’s getting involved right now.

The shock of it all fades away and he locks eyes with you. “You wanna come outside with me?”

You nod quietly. “Not s’ sure I’m gonna be the best walker..” you give this cute little sheepish shrug when you say it. He laughs and shrugs too. “I gotcha.” he scoops you up to carry you out the back door and your arms wind up around his neck and you’re laughing because you can’t stop thinking about what you admitted to your friends during your little stupid game earlier.

Parts of you are tempted to just let it all slip out but the other parts of you, the parts of you that know better and know it’ll be a disaster, they override the overwhelming urge, thankfully.

You’re just kind of quiet, kind of content to take what you can get -fully aware that you’ll pretend this went further than it did later on when you’re all alone. The thought elicits a soft purr that tickles this one spot on Tommy’s neck that’s the quickest way to drive him crazy.

He has to tighten his grip because when he hears -and feels, the sound, it’s all he can do not to drop you because it goes straight to his cock. And the inner turmoil grows. Because now, he’s not only dealing with whether to sit on what he’s overheard or bring it up somehow but in addition, he’s dealing with the fact that it’s been quite a dry spell, this is the longest he’s gone without some kind of physical affection, even if it’s just a heated kiss to shut his former girlfriend the hell up.

So every little noise, every little shift your body makes against his, all of it… It’s really driving him crazy right now. He’s real riled up but… He’s determined to behave himself.

This needs time. You’re not in the shape right now and Tommy’s honestly just enjoying the night for what it’s turned into for once. He hasn’t felt this happy in a really long time.

Since 7th grade when Carol just sort of drifted into his life and Steve stood up for him with some asshole in their class who constantly tormented him about any number of things, from his teeth, to his freckles or the way he dressed back then.

He’s forgotten what it feels like and now that he’s being reminded, he just isn’t in a hurry for the feeling to end.

He digs around in the pocket of his jeans to retrieve a lighter and you’re clinging to him. “I’ve gotta be getting heavy to hold.” you gaze at him in concern and Tommy’s brow raises. “Are you kiddin me?”

“Well, I mean..” you laugh softly. “I’m not a feather, y’know.”

“You’re not a cow either, holy shit.” Tommy laughs and the laughter dies away. You don’t feel right clinging to him the way you are or making him hold you so you slip out of his arms. Tommy pouts a little to himself, the pout fading when you compromise by leaning against him. He lights his cigarette and takes a long drag. “Hey..” he nods to a lounge chair on the deck, “C’mon. Let’s get you sitting. Pretty sure everything is spinnin right now, huh?”

You giggle. Hold up your fingers and drawl that it is.

He situates himself in the lounge chair and pulls you down so that you’re sitting between his legs. You lean yourself back against him and before he can stop himself, an arm is slipping around your waist. He tells himself it’s just so your ex boyfriend will fuck off and leave you alone tonight, because he happens to be lurking outside and watching the two of you intently, 

But deep down he knows that isn’t the only reason.

You spot a cluster of stars. And you glance back at him. “I think that’s Cassiopeia.”

Tommy’s blank look prompts an explanation and about halfway through, you feel like maybe you’re boring him to death because you have to be, this isn’t gossip and that’s what he’s used to because he’s one of them, after all. You trail off and go quiet.

Tommy leans into you a little from behind. “What were you gonna say?”

You finish telling him about Cassiopeia and the way she was elevated to the sky along with Cephus and Princess Andromeda as a star but her punishment for boasting came in the form of embarrassment, she was forced to wheel around the North celestial pole and spend half her time clinging to her throne just so she doesn’t fall off.

Tommy chuckles quietly. “There’s uh.. One problem, princess. We’re probably a little too far away from the North celestial Pole for that to be Cassiopeia.” he tries not to but he winds up resting his chin on your shoulder and you laugh softly. “You’re probably right.”

The wind picks up a little and he rubs your arms. “Cold?” he asks the question with a laugh.

“Kinda. But it’s okay.” your teeth are chattering. His jacket winds up around your shoulders and despite telling himself not to do it, he winds up positioning himself even closer so that his chest is pressed completely against his back and both of his legs cage in both of yours on the side. You gulp and when you take a few deep breaths after, they all come out shaky.

You huddle into the jacket over your shoulders for warmth and all you can smell is Tommy. All the little things that make up his scent have you smiling like an idiot. And the warmth of the jacket, you make yourself laugh quietly when you have the thought that he’s an actual human furnace.

Across the patio, Ben is watching. Seething and fuming.

Furious because you barely let him touch you and yet you’re sharing a lounge chair with that idiot Tommy Hagan. Carol notices his attention’s drifted from her and when she happens to glance over to see why, she’s flooded with hurt and jealousy.

And anger because how dare him. He wasn’t supposed to get over her like this. It’s only been a few weeks.

Tommy happens to glance up just in time to catch both Ben and Carol watching you both and he tenses. Grumbles to himself about it quietly but decides right then and there that he’s not worried about either of them. If Ben wants to try something, he’ll start and finish whatever Ben attempts. 

Tommy isn’t the only one whose noticed the latest happy couple of Hawkins High as their gazes burn into the two of you.

“What the hell are no tits and no brains lookin at right now?” you mutter mostly to yourself. Maybe it’s the vodka or something else that leads you to do it, but you stare right back at Carol, sticking out your tongue as you roll your eyes. 

“Take a picture, holy shit.” you grumble and this makes Tommy laugh. Then he remembers that Carol used to tease you a lot when you were all kids. And he cringes at the mental replay because thinking about it now, it’s clear to him that she had to have been doing it because she was jealous, same as when she constantly gave Nancy hell last year when Steve started dating her.

When Tommy catches Ben glaring at him all he does is raise his middle finger. Unlike you, he’s loud. With a razor sharp tongue and sarcasm that knows no bounds. And he’s not afraid to say what’s on his mind.

“Keep lookin over here, Thompson. It’ll be your last fuckin mistake.” Tommy calls out to Ben.

“Have fun with your downgrade, Tommy.” Carol cozies up to Ben and smirks. Tommy is hurt a little, it does sting because you don’t just spend the largest part of your life with somebody and suddenly you can just turn off everything you felt at once, but.. The anger he  feels at her comment overshadows it briefly and he comes to the realization that Carol Perkins has always been this exact brand of miserable bitch.

And he’s starting to see that maybe he was getting tired of the misery and the fighting or the way that the only time they seemed to click was whenever they were making everyone around them miserable too. This leads to his final realization.

While Steve missed his point about Nancy Wheeler entirely, Steve hadn’t been wrong to say some of the shit he said to the two of them the last time they spoke. And he knows it’s gotta be tense for Billy because they were slowly starting to be friends and then the fight happened and the rift started. They’re all on the same basketball team and this rift has definitely caused chaos in the dynamic on the court.

Maybe if he was ready to cut ties and move on, maybe he needed to try. To offer some kind of olive branch to Steve, at least tell the guy he was right, that he had been an asshole.

He decides that he’ll go over to Steve’s in the morning and he’ll try to talk to him. In honor of turning over what he hopes will be a new leaf.

You decide to turn so that you’re facing Tommy and when you do, this causes you to put your legs over his thighs with your feet dangling off the chair. Tommy’s eyes catch on your lips again. He licks his lips and you swallow hard, your eyes following the way his tongue drags over his lips. 

When you blurt it out before you can stop yourself, you want to disappear, melt away through the the patio straight into another dimension never to return.

“You uh.. You have really pretty eyes.” you mumble quietly, your gaze settling on the way your bare legs top Tommy’s jean clad thighs. Tommy swallows hard and chuckles. And there’s this little rush, the slightest lazy flutter in the pit of his stomach.

“You do too.” he answers after taking another drag of the cigarette he’s nearly smoked to the butt end. He flicks the cigarette at a bucket nearby full of glass bottles, ice cream wrappers, other food wrappers and a few other cigarette butts.

Then he turns his attention back to you.

Across the way a little, Ben and Carol are both fuming about their respective losses. Carol smirks to herself as she decides that if she can’t have Tommy some little nobody like you is getting him either. She fully intends to make your life a living hell from Monday onward.

Maybe if she pushes hard enough, you’ll back off and Tommy won’t move on, leaving her behind.

And Ben agrees to go along with it simply because he’s an asshole and he genuinely can’t stand Tommy Hagan.

Billy arrives back at the party with an armload of beer that he dragged your older brother out of bed to get and you cringe when you ask, “So.. uh.. How much trouble am I in?”

“You’re good, pint size.” Billy shrugs and grins.

You raise a brow. Billy laughs. “Relax, woman. Just fucking like.. Enjoy tonight.”

You nod.

Tommy takes one of the cans for himself and gets one of the other guys on their team who’s heading back inside to see if Tina’s still got Sprite or something in the house.

“My girl’s kind of toasted, buddy.” Tommy explains to Eric with a chuckle. Eric gives him a thumbs up and glances from you back to Tommy. “Your girl, huh?” Eric chuckles again. “Sprite. Comin up, man.”

You blink a little but you don’t try to correct Tommy when he says it because deep down, you wish it was true.

Eric comes back out a minute or two later and he tosses the Sprite to Tommy. Tommy pulls the tab and hands it to you. “I don’t think you need to mix vodka with this shit, " he holds up the beer he's drinking and continues, "princess. Hangover’s already gonna be hell tomorrow, I think.”

Billy winces but he laughs. “And I’m going to come over bright and early just to be loud.”

“You, sir, are a dick.” you pout and stick your tongue out at Billy.

Billy shrugs. But he laughs. “Nah.”

You stick out your tongue at him.

Tommy chuckles quietly.

“I’m gonna talk to Harrington tomorrow. Try to clear the air, man. We’ve got that big practice game next week.”

Billy nurses the beer in his hand and nods. “Yep. We all need to be on the same page, Hagan. Guy needs to get his head in the game. So do you. But I think you’re gonna be okay… Right?”

Tommy laughs and nods in agreement.

Billy chuckles. “It’s about damn time, Hagan.” he tosses him another cold one after Tommy’s crushed the can of the one he’s just finished in his hand. “Chug, Hagan.”

Tommy laughs, but he starts to chug down the beer Billy’s just given him.

The party is coming to a quiet conclusion inside. Billy stands and stretches, giving a lazy yawn. “I think this party is dead now.”

“Totally dead.” Tommy agrees and all you do is yawn sleepily and give a thumbs up. Tommy snickers and then his gaze settles on you. Billy speaks up. “Pint size… You comin with us or what?”

“The car.” you start to speak up and remind Billy that you did drive your Mustang to the party tonight, but Billy shakes his head, shutting it down with a shrug.

“Your brother said he’d get it in the morning if there wasn’t a dependable DD to drive it. You realize you’re gonna owe him one though… Right?”

“Yeah.” you grumble about owing your brother one but you’re happy that he’s actually not going to rat you out to your mother because she’d have a small farm if she knew that you not only snuck out tonight to come in the first place, but you were also too drunk to really function for most of the night.

And the lecture you’d get, oh my god.

Tommy stands and this puts you wrapped around him. His arms caged underneath your ass and he’s holding onto you nice and tight so he doesn’t drop you. “I got the back seat, man.”

“Neither of you were gettin shotgun anyway.” Billy states, glancing from Tommy to you as he holds up the half of the case he’s got left. “Where else am I sittin my drinks, hm?”

Tommy laughs. The three of you make your way out to Billy’s Camaro and as it pulls to a stop a few houses down from your house, Tommy slips out and holds out his hand. “C’mon. I’ll help you get in.”

“Y-you don’t have to.”

“I want to though.” he insists. You can only nod and let him grab your hand and pull you out of the backseat. Then you’re being carried again, deposited on the steps by the back door.

Tommy’s hesitant to leave, so he’s lingering. Stepping closer to you as he leans in and one of his hands catches in the hair at the back of your head. Your noses bump clumsily and you both laugh. The kiss is sweet but awkward, your hand gripping the front of his shirt as you raise up onto your toes to close the distance between your mouths. When your brother finally drags himself down to open the door, he chuckles and sizes Tommy up.

As you’re about to disappear into your house, Tommy runs back up.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” he wants to kick himself because he meant to ask you if you wanted to do something the next day. Not tell you he’d see you. “Fuck.” he grumbles, annoyed with himself. “I meant to ask if you wanted to go to the Hawk with me tomorrow night. That uh.. The Terminator is playing, I think.” and again, he wants to kick himself because this is not something he’s used to at all. He laughs. “Or we can see something different.”

You giggle. Raise up to tiptoe to brush your lips against his as you place your hand against his shirt. “The Terminator is fine… Rambo.” you give him a little wink before vanishing into your parents house because you just can’t resist the urge.

Tommy grins like an idiot and as he bolts back down to Billy’s idling Camaro, he pumps his fist in victory.

Billy’s laughing as he watches Tommy race towards him. The Camaro speeds off and Billy smirks when he glances over at Tommy out of the corner of his eye as he drives away and casually repeats what he told him hours ago when they were sitting at the curb outside Tina’s party. “I told you, man. Plenty of other fish in the sea.”

Tommy chuckles. “Yeah, okay. Yeah you did.”

#tommy hagan #tommy hagan fanfiction #tommy hagan x fem!reader #tommy hagan imagine #tommy hagan oneshot #tommy hagan x fem!reader imagine #// if i go beyond part 1 there is going to be so much steve/tommy/billy friendship and shenanigans i s2g #// bc lowkey i kinda liked any of the three with each other #// but to write it oh god. i'd never fucking do it justice bc just trust me. #// so yeah. #// this is out there now. #// idk if there will be more or not. i left room to add if i choose. #// i just had to give my two babies ... something. #// so why not indulge everyone else too hm? #// so if you've been looking for an x reader thing with Tommy H... here ya go i guess.

[mey-rin-is-fabulous]

Greetings! Hi there! Pardon me for being this direct. But my little kitty needs your help, i know times are tough but please if you have some time to spare, kindly boost/share the post I pinned for her. It would be so meaningful to me as I’m hoping it would reach more people.. please 💔🙏 praying you’d consider, and pls kindly send me a msg for a response or answer the ask privately so I could atleast thank you for doing us a favor! Wishing you good health and peace! 🫶🏽

Hey guys remember those posts I reblogged about that scam going around look what just entered into my ask box.

Look I am immediately distrustful of any asks I get like this because these blogs have never interacted with me prior, I rarely if ever get asks and who sends asks to random blogs about donating to their pets anyway.

That and the one I got last time this scam went around also asked about boosting their pinned post.

Usually I'd block and report but I'm just answering so you guys can see the blog for yourselves. God no wonder ask culture is going downhill with anon hate and scams like these and of course asks getting eaten.

#thetreepoink #ask #scam

[dietcokeplease]

Bruh youre so fucking rude and if you hate me and my house so much just fucking LEAVE ALREADY

Also like nice job forgetting to remove me from the gc until AFTER you bitch about me

Like i fucking care, make me out as the bad guy to your friends as much as you want, i have receipts and im not the asshole here

This shit makes me wanna start a reddit so i can make a post on AITA and send it to yall lolol

"They treat us like squatters just cause we dont pay rent" UHHH number 1: not paying rent (or even contributing to the household in a positive way) makes you squatters lol, and number 2: we treat you like squatters cause you act like squatters

Like, youre not entitled to my kindness or charity, stop acting like entitled brats

I literally saved you from homelessness (by your own admission) by inviting you into my home rent-free, gave you your own spaces and helped decorate and shit and told you not to worry about money cause i wanted you to feel at home and be able to save money to get back on your feet, but also never imposed strict time limits on how long you could stay) and in return you treated my home like some shitty motel that you can just trash and not do anything to contribute to the household like you said you would

Nothing in this world is free, someone has to pay for it, so i end up paying for you to live here through utilities (which youve also raised significantly by never turning electronics/lights off and leaving the front door wide open all the time), ON TOP of buying you groceries, your medications, and a bunch of non-essentials like video games and shit cause you're depressed and apparently not being able to play the newest video game makes you actively suicidal

Ive also driven you to multiple dr appts on 3+ hour roundtrips, also on my own dime, and volunteered to give you weekly injections so that you didnt have to remember to take a pill every day

I put up with you being straight up rude to me (comparing me to your abuser all because i said i wouldnt go out of my way to fix a mess that you created, hello??) and this is the thanks i get??

Like, i even wrote out the nicest msg i could to be like hey pls stop being asshole roommates or you gotta go, with a detailed list of the shit you regularly pull, but i never sent it cause i was hoping that nicely asking about individual issues would be enough

Specific examples not included- REPEATEDLY using my nice steak knives as regular knives (for shit like peanut butter, cutting brownies, etc) and leaving them lying around dirty despite the fact that ive asked multiple times to AT LEAST clean them and put them away right away, vaping inside and allowing guests to vape inside despite knowing the STRICT no smoking rule, repeatedly using other peoples things without asking and not at least putting it back where found (perfume, toothpaste, cologne, socks, hair bleach etc etc), eating the last of other ppls food (one time i got a dozen donuts and ate two, then when i came back not even 6hr later, the entire box was empty and no one had said a word to me, i had bought them for my sister who was visiting, who didnt get to have any), using the last of the toilet paper and instead of letting someone know or getting more, using paper towels (like were you raised in a barn?? Paper towels cannot go in the toilet), losing the only garage key when you shouldnt have even had it with you in the first place, and more that i cant even think of rn

So if you "feel like [your] at war constantly" then maybe stop doing shit that you know is going to start fights, aka stop stomping all over my boundaries