#that's not even a thing that's just. how i feel because vague is the only way i can describe it all

[beenbaanbuun]

hi! i wanted to ask something about yeosang

since he's a werewolf, would he change in full moon? would he have ruts? how would the family take care of it?

now, yeosang may not transform when the full moon hits, but he certainly acts more primal. even after he’s grown used to being around the family and coddled by darling, he can’t help himself when it comes to that time of the month.

the day before, he’s always a little grumpier. seonghwa can’t ruffle his hair without yeosang snarling at him, hongjoong can’t make a snarky comment without getting a snooty remark in return, and darling can’t irritate him as much as she usually does without him pinning her to the floor like a disobedient pup. not that she particularly minds being pinned; it only adds to her fun when he’s leaning above her, anger racing through his expression as he reprimands her.

but the day of the full moon is when the three of non-werewolf residents really need to watch out. if his mood is bad leading up to it, it’s absolutely foul when it actually hits. yeosang will go back to his old biting habits, baring his teeth if anyone does anything even vaguely in his vicinity. if seonghwa accidentally steps on that creeky floorboard whilst walking to his favourite spot on the chez, yeosang will snap his jaws. if hongjoong puts a chess piece down a little too loudly, yeosang will snarl. if darling dares to touch him, we’ll, let’s be real, he won’t do much more than pin her and bare his teeth, but it’ll still be much meaner than usual. the scolding will actually feel real for once, even more so than those empty threats he chucked her way during the first few weeks he was there. safe to say even she tries to avoid him when it’s that time of the month.

as for ruts, yeosang does experience them but it’s nowhere near as painful and violent as media makes it out to be. sure, it’s unpleasant to have a permanently hard dick for a week, three times a year, but he’s not bed bound or anything. he can still get up and move around and interact with the rest of the family without jumping darling’s bones. he’s just a little more… desperate… in a way that makes him completely and utterly submissive. like sure, he wants to breed but he’ll beg for it first. and yes, he wants darling to be in his arms 24/7, but if that means he needs to act as her personal teddy bear for a week then goddammit he will. he hates his ruts for this specific reason; he can hardly pretend to be the big bad wolf when every bone in his body is telling him to do whatever it takes to have his precious pup curled up nice and safely in his arms.

and hongjoong and seonghwa let him have what he wants, if it suits them. during the day when they’re both busy, he has to be good; keep his dick in his pants and stick solely to cuddling her by the fire. of course, yeosang will obey. in the state he’s in, he’s so desperate to keep darling with him that he’ll listen to whatever it is seonghwa and hongjoong tell him.

but as soon as one or both of them are free to monitor that he doesn’t go too far, and providing darling is okay with it, yeosang has free reign. the poor thing is so desperate that he barely lasts long, but it doesn’t really matter because it’s just as much about getting his partner off as it is himself. he explained it as ‘proving himself’ when hongjoong had asked why he was so desperate to make darling cum too. the man supposes that’s as good of a reason as any…

#ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #opposites attract universe #yeosang x reader #matz x reader #seonghwa x reader #hongjoong x reader

[weebsinstash]

I'm sorry but I'm going insane for your idea of Lilith and Luci getting a sinner pregnant together can we please have more of your thoughts on this idea 🙏

Absolutely because I'm a dirty little heathen and Season 2 isn't just about to magically pop up out of the ground and I've had SOME THOUGHTS and also this post is way longer than it should be 💀

I was sitting and I was thinking of the concept of the Hotel having communal breakfasts or having at least one day of the week where there's food served and everyone (typically) eats together, not only as a bonding/unity sort of thing but also simular to how real hotels can have complimentary breakfast as part of your stay, and like, yeesh this is actually an entirely separate fic idea in of itself but you're talking with Alastor and you're saying something along the lines of "oh yeah, well, I was actually starting to think a lot about motherhood before I died, but, raising children is so complicated, not to mention society right now is so genuinely hostile and dangerous to children, and i wouldn't have been able to afford it anyways, and, well, you know, NOW i literally can't have them down here"

AND FROM THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE END OF THE TABLE

COMPLETELY UNPROMPTED

HERE'S LILITH, "Oh! It wouldn't be impossible at all! You and Lucifer could still have a baby :)"

RECORD SCRATCH SOUND EFFECT AS EVERYONE LOOKS TO THE QUEEN OF HELL. She seems completely unbothered while her husband is A TOMATO, he can barely even look in your direction, he's just tugging on her sleeve, "L-Lili, cmon, don't say things like that 😳🥴" and awkwardly laughing, maybe even asking to speak to his wife in private (I feel like its a regular occurrence for these two to dip out of a room and reappear and Lilith is reapplying her lipstick as she re-enters followed by a kiss covered Lucifer lmao)

Can you even imagine going to Charlie, "hey um, this is awkward, your mom keeps like. Jesus please don't kill me I'm not a homewrecker but your mom keeps making comments about me having a baby with your dad and she sounds completely serious about it and shes been bringing it up for like two weeks" and you could not be saying this in a more obvious "hey girl this is weird and I don't like it, can you chat with your parents for me to stop this" kind of way BUT, the actual way Charlie is responding ALSO THROWS YOU OFF. I can see it already, Charlie all but LIGHTS UP WITH EXCITEMENT and she, takes a breath, "oh!! I mean!! You don't have to do anything you don't want to obviously, bbBUT UH THAT BEING SAID oh gosh that sounds like it would make you really happy, aaaaand and I know you wanted a family of your own and, hey isn't this place about new beginnings and" GIRL WE AREN'T HAVING A BABY WITH YOUR DAD TF?

You know how I made that post "hey Lucifer kind of appears to have these vague Master Of All type powers down in Hell, what if he could manipulate your dreams and made you dream about being a kid because he's wanting to heal your inner child/adopt you". I also started thinking recently about Lucifer AND OR Lilith using these powers to make you dream about 1) being with them in general and more specifically 2) motherhood and i started mentally deep diving for that shit. Like. It could genuinely actually get so fucked up actually. Could you imagine you're just, VULNERABLE with the Queen of Hell and you're drunk and you're crying and you're just, SPILLING EVERYTHING, she's getting your entire life's story, and she's petting your hair as youre way too drunk to realize youre telling her way too much, amd she's just thinking "oh you poor thing, human society sounds absolutely dreadful now" and like. Think of it from a hypothetical fantasy psychology perspective. It's not like Lilith has never been part of modern society, she's been a member of Hell forever and has only been out of contact for 7 years, BUT she also exists from a time predating all of that AND she built Hell with Lucifer, so like, imagine she actually starts forming some um Strong Opinions on how, it sounds like all these complicated modern things are really dragging you down, both as a person and as a free spirit, and comes to a consensus that your life needs to be a little... simpler

I'm serious, I'm talking "Lilith makes you dream about being In The Actual Goddamn Garden Of Eden Itself with her and Lucifer and you're ALL naked". Just completely controlling your dream. You're naked as the day you were born and so are they and you can't control your dream at ALL. Lilith is wanting to like, watch you peacefully frolic around, I'm talking she wants to see you having your Hot Nymph Summer where you're napping in beds of flowers and you're having birds land on your finger and you're gasping at all the pretty flowers and wanting to explore and, experiencing the beauty of being alive without all these messy modern nuances and it's like NO MAAM I DONT WANT TO PICK BERRIES FROM THAT BUSH, YOU CAN SEE M Y BUSH AND I CAN SEE YOURS AND YOUR HUSBANDS---

Alastor is over here thinking he's hot shit, "oh I do so wish we could return to simpler times without all these modern trivial problems!!" MEANWHILE LILITH IS LIKE. ACTUALLY GOING THAT EXTRA MILE. Alastor is like "boo cellphones are bad and women dont dress modestly enough, people these days spend too mych time with technology and not with family" meanwhile in "the garden" a completely naked Lilith is braiding your hair and weaving flowers into it while an also completely naked Lucifer is feeding you berries by hand as they discuss the idea of having a nice fun swim in the lake passed the glade, like you guys really are frolicking and fucking around like a bunch of fairies and it's. It's peaceful and fun but also you miss your cellphone and having underwear 😩 like miss queen of hell can I PLEASE get some boob support--

Moving on, I was thinking of the Fake Garden in of itself, as its own idea, but like in this poly baby raising context, it would be essentially Phase 1 of the plan to normalize their presences to you and make you more comfortable around them and then skipping into Phase 10 of "oh hey by the way you're gonna have a dream about um sleeping with the King and Queen of Hell and it's Totally Not Real and you're Totally Definitely Not Actually Like For Real For Real Legitimately Pregnant Now ;)" like. First off before I get any farther in this post can we just like acknowledge the like HEINOUSNESS of you not knowing everything is "real dreams" and LiliLuci using this to their full advantage to ask and find out anything about you because basically to them, they think you're just being boggled down and negatively influences by modern human society and you're like an onion they have to peel some layers off of first to expose those juicy inner tender bits

Just. Ok. Like. High level fantasy horror concept ok, here we go I'm gonna cook here:

It eventually does move on to you having dreams about living in an actual home with Lucifer and Lilith, sleeping with them in you know, All Those Ways, basically in what you think is some weird imaginary throuple that while you do find yourself enjoying it like actually, you can't wake up from it, and these dreams can feel WAY too long sometimes. You're dreaming of some, "am I a man dreaming I am a butterfly or am I a butterfly dreaming i am a man" shit where you hit the pillow in Hell and Dream You is waking up, seeing your husband and wife get ready for work and you're basically a pampered stay at home spouse. I honestly can't decide what dynamic would be cuter: both of them having jobs, you and Lilith having jobs while Lucifer is the house husband, only Lilith having a job while you and Lucifer do dumb shit at home, or Lucifer being big daddy and bringing home all the money while you and Lilith lounge by the pool and she takes you to the spa and pampers you all day and is sending texts and photos of how cute you are to her husband while he's working

You're probably thinking "wait but weeb this is actually kind of cute, where is the horror" and for starters it just kind of, mentally wears your energy down over time to 'never shut your brain off' and have true rest, like Lilith and Lucifer intentionally 'trade' you being alert in reality to you being more conscious in the dream world, so, you're not as present when you're around ACTUAL people as you are when you're in their little, fucked up pocket dimension.

Then you've got. The baby. You're pregnant ONLY in the dream. You have THE ACTUAL PAINFUL EXPERIENCE of giving birth, BUT THEN you're waking up and you can't hold your child, show them to your friends, have the, SANITY AND COMFORT OF KNOWING YOU ACTUALLY HAVE ONE. You're waking up DEVASTATED. Where's your baby? 🥺 oh right.... They're not... actually real... like it fucks you up psychologically

I just picture, if I were to put it in an order of events. You go from 1. Lilith and Lucifer are just your casual acquaintances, Charlie's parents that you know through her 2. They start getting closer to you as you stay longer at the Hotel 3. Ok we get along and have fun moments and even sing songs and we have fun times with your daughter ^^ 4. Ok you're getting maybe a little comfortable, am I tripping or are you a little too comfortable 5. You're Bush Out in Fake Eden 6. You accidentally slip up and get more cozy with them in reality because Ok Maybe The Stupid Garden Bullshit IS Fun And Maybe A Little Soul Healing 🙄 7. You're getting banged in the Garden 8. Being in reality is awkward now, suddenly you're avoiding them less, so you're dreaming about them more, having them push themselves closer to you in response to you trying to pull away, like even if you're spending entire days outside of the Hotel you can't escape needing to sleep eventually 9. Suddenly you're like, not in Eden, you're in a hospital getting an ultrasound w Lili Luci holding your hands as a doctor tells the three of you you're pregnant and oh no you're actually really happy and excited about it 🥺 10. crushing crushing reality. You're single and not pregnant and you're beating yourself up for these fucked up dreams you're blaming yourself for having, as if they're some self conscious desire and you're kinkshaming yourself for having them 11. Dream You is having your baby, everyone is so happy like it's actually so perfect, even when you're stressed as a first time parent you have so much love and support to keep you strong 12. You wake up and it's nothing but DEPRESSION DEPRESSION DEPRESSION where is my baby and my wife and my husband who love me and I love them DEPRESSION DEPRESSION DEPRESSION 13. Lilith and Lucifer HAVE TO to spill that Hey Our Baby Is Real because you're like going near insane with "grief" like youre like actually wanting to try and end your life or constantly self harming because Where Is MY CHILD 14. You're so fucked up at this point you don't care to ask questions when they hand your Very Much Real Baby to you looking exactly how you remember them from your dreams. You're just happy your baby is real and now you can be with them all of the time and you don't even care that um This Was Such A Fucking Ethically Dubious Conception.

Do you think the other Hotel residents would have a sliding scale of being ok with this. Like you just SHOW UP WITH THIS LITTLE BLONDE BABY IN YOUR ARMS and Lilith and Lucifer are all but glued to you and they're all fucking confused because WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN??? you barely even spend time with these two, or so they thought??? When were you PREGNANT??? HOW??? I feel like realistically if they aren't all, you know, as Equally Crazy For You, that they would find this extremely manipulative and fucked up MEANWHILE CHARLIE DOESNT CARE and may have been in on it.

Also "something something what if Reader being able to get pregnant also turned out to be like God Himself being like 'hey lucifer lilith here's the deal I'm throwing you a bone right now, ok, this is for you, to keep things chill between us mk' and there are added layers of Oh Shit You Were Created To Be With Them" as if your ass wouldn't have an impossible enough time escaping as is 😭💀

But like... the concept of Reader falling so deep into "grief" that it gets so bad that you're basically not eating or sleeping, Lucirer and Lilith were always gonna tell you but they're forced to do it abruptly because you just breakdown and can't stop crying. Or it's even Charlie disobeying her parents and running up to you with your baby who stops crying the moment they're in your arms

I also just... as a final note..... just as a cute palette cleanser there's one specific idea I keep thinking of... you have your new baby and you're showing it to all your Hotel buddies and you give it to Alastor to hold because your baby was giggling and gurgling at him and you're just, death grip on his shoulder, "alastor please hold my child :) they're excited go meet you, say hi" and while you're like, vaguely threatening him to interact with this baby which he has Extremely Valid Reasons To Find Abhorrent, his deer ears move or twitch, and your baby is just looking up at him with their big eyes, watching those ears twitch, and, poof! Your baby has their first Lucifer/Lilith related shape-shifting incident and suddenly your baby has twitching little red ears and they're looking up at Alastor with these big cute eyes and here you are, "alastor :) aren't you going to praise my baby :) they just had their very first shift and it's for you :) tell them what a good job they did :) you're not trying to make my baby uncomfortable are you :)" and. Ok Maybe this does win Alastor over a bit being the narcissist that he is BUT THE TRUE REWARD is Lucifer scrambling into the room after you call out in excitement, dropping to his knees and all but wailing, "NO, WHY IS MY BABY HAVING THEIR FIRST SHIFT FOR Y O U AND I MISSED IT" and you just have Alastor being an ABSOLUTE SHIT, suddenly oh so cozy with your baby, "well talent recognizes talent! This little one clearly has potential! Why, look at how clearly they ALREADY ADORE THEIR DEAR UNCLE ALASTOR >:)" and from then on you can't leave these two men alone with your baby or they'll be having nonstop contests to "win them over" and prove who the best role model/caretaker is

Ok. Lastly. Lastly lastly lastly. THIS BABY SPECIFICALLY IS RUINING MY LIFE. Look at those STUPID CHUBBY cheeks and those big eyes and how attentive and focused she is like oh my godddddddd if LiliLuci handed one of those to me "this is yours" i would just die like 🥺🥺🥺 man, I'll have to tell you guys later about my idea for "Reader wants to see if Rosie will let them adopt a Hellborn baby and Alastor helps vouch for you and lowkey becomes your husband/the child's second parent" or "Reader finds an abandoned imp baby and all the shenanigans/protective possessive feelings from your yandere/s that follow once you begin your motherhood journey "

#yandere hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer x reader #yandere x reader #yandere hellaverse #hh #sinprompts #hhhhrrrrrrrrr I KEEP HAVING ALASTOR THOUGHTS THOUGH

[frogserotonin]

overthinker- lars pinfield x reader

a/n: short one bc im still in a slump rn many sorries. also sorry lawl this fic is so disconjointed and i’m really unhappy with it but whatever 😭 warnings: nothin proper i don’t think, most ooc lars to ever ooc, unedited; tell me if i've spelt smth wrong 😁

“Would you want to go out to get some lunch together on our break?” Your fingertips bounce off of the sides of your legs as you try to remain composed. You're so high-strung right now, you almost expect him to laugh in your face. Nerves and the effects of having slept a fitful two hours last night override your usually rational brain and you feel the need to just run away without receiving an answer bloom in your chest.

“I thought you usually brought lunch? If you forgot to bring some you can have some of mine, if you want.” Lars doesn’t even look up from what he’s working on, just adjusts his glasses and uses a vague jut of his elbow to point to his locker, where you know his bag is. Your heart simultaneously drops and stutters. 

“Oh, it’s okay, I just felt like going out to eat, thank you though.” You try to make your words seem more upbeat than you feel, unsure of whether or not to take his words as a rejection.

“Oh. Okay then.” It must be your imagination, but his words hold a hint of disappointment. You open your mouth again, then close it, and silence re-envelopes the room. Turning, you make your way to your desk and begin to work away, dejection slumping your shoulders forward and making time drag on. When eventually the lunch break arrives, you grab your bag and rush your way out of the lab.

A squeak of shoes on the concrete floor behind you almost has you looking back, but your brain is so addled you almost believe you’ve made it up.

Like a fool, you don't talk to him when you come back, or when you leave, the time you spend alone and in silence building up an anxiety in the back of your mind. The idea that he's all too aware of your feelings, and is made uncomfortable by them and your advances overtakes you completely. That night, you stay awake, tossing and turning, over analysing every interaction you've ever had with him, trying to make sure you've not overstepped and made a complete and utter fool of yourself.

In the morning, you consider it a miracle you leave the house at all, with how tired you are. The thought of calling in sick crosses your mind, but by the time you get up your body automatically locks itself into its usual routine, and you mindlessly get dressed and make your way to the Ghostbusters facilities. Through your drowsiness, the realisation that you’re at your desk and doing absolutely nothing sets in and you jolt. 

“Good morning.” If he didn’t sound so concerned, Lars would sound thoroughly amused. “You alright? Look a bit…off.” Your face flares, and you go to stand up, only to stumble and almost fall on your face. Hands out, you stabilise yourself, and then face him.

“Yeah. Morning.” You can only hope that he backs off, because his concern seems too genuine for your feelings to not expand exponentially the more he stands before you looking like he cares. “M’feeling just peachy, you?.” Belatedly, you realise your words are clearly not convincing because he doesn’t move an inch, simply studying you. He then sighs and shakes his head, chuckling a little bit, just softly under his breath, taking a couple steps closer to you. 

“When’s the last time you slept?” His voice is too gentle, too un-Lars-like, that you’re almost convinced you actually did fall asleep last night, and now you’re dreaming. You open your mouth to respond, but find yourself nodding off as you do so, the last thing you process before fully passing out is the feeling of arms around your chest and shoulders. 

When you come to, you sit up quickly, and slowly become aware of what had happened. Muttering cursing to yourself under your breath, you take in your surroundings, finding yourself slung over the small couch situated in the room reserved for taking time off from work briefly. Hurriedly, you rush out of the room towards where you assume Lars is working, apology already on the tip of your tongue. You approach him quickly and loudly, a fact that can be gathered from his head immediately snapping up when you enter the room. He starts to speak, no doubt to rattle off reasons why you were irresponsible and stupid for coming to work while being aware you weren’t at your fullest capacity, but you cut him off.

“God, I’m so sorry. That was humiliating, and I’m so, so sorry that it happened, it won’t happen again.” You bow your head, refusing to look him in the eye, but quickly look up again when you hear him laugh. 

“It’s fine, really, you just scared me a little bit.” His smile is small, but sincere and you remember fully the reason you were in the predicament in the first place. “Are you feeling better now?” 

You probably look a bit crazy with how vigorously you nod, but you barely care anymore. 

“Yes, thank you so much, really, I’m sorry that it happened.” He laughs again, and it sounds like heaven.

“You don’t need to thank me or apologise,” Lars’ eyes sparkle a bit behind his glasses when he properly smiles, and you can feel warmth rush to your face. He hesitates, like he’s calculating his words, then gently says “I-uh. I care for you a lot, it really meant nothing for me to make sure you were okay.”

#lars pinfield #lars pinfield x reader #ghostbusters frozen empire

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Am I the asshole for not noticing I hurt my friend's feelings?

I (24F) had a somewhat close friend (24F) whom I've known since highschool but only got closer to recently. I've had a friend crush on her forever and apparently she did too. We share a lot of interests and we're both neurodivergent (I'm diagnosed with adhd, and we're almost certain she has autism). We also sort of bonded over a shared trauma -- basically we got two-timed several years ago by a really abusive asshole.

Anyway something happened a couple of months ago and I feel our friendship has gone downhill since then. It was multiple occasions really: what would happen is that I would say something impulsively, and she would misinterpret it and get sensitive about it, we talk it out, I apologize, and we move on. But one time it was a bit too much that i burst into tears while texting her because I felt I really hurt her and I felt that all my friendships will go downhill because whenever I get comfortable with someone I just completely lose my filter and end up hurting them. What happened that day was that we were hanging out and a guy apparently told her something sexist but I didn't hear him. She came to me to complain and I sort of brushed it off because from the way she said it happened it just seemed he was vaguely pointing out something but I later understood that I was just wrong. Then her dress had a tiny hole which I pointed out to her in front of my boyfriend rather impulsively and she got really upset about that. Later on I was telling her about a book I'd read that had great autism representation that didn't have the character just be -- and here I did the dinosaur arms thing (no offense whatsoever to people who do that; I know full well it's a common thing, I was just saying the character had more to him than just that). The problem is that she didn't hear the part where I was talking about a book character because we were changing tables in a crowded cafe and I was just talking non-stop because that's what I do and she thought I just did the dinosaur arms out of nowhere and got offended but didn't say so except over text later and just looked unwell for the rest of the next half hour before she suddenly excused herself and left. That day she texted me about all of these things and we talked it out and I pretended that I was not literally having a meltdown all while apologizing (but not before I tried to plead my case a bit). This all happened on the same day, but before that there were other occasions too. One time she would be talking about something, then I change the subject, then she'd say I know you didn't mean to but I wanted you to give a reply to what I just said. Another time we had a particularly bad exam which I did okay on, but she was telling about how she botched it. I couldn't tell from her face how serious it was and I gave her what i thought was a sympathetic smile (which she later told me was a weird smile) because I really didn't know what to say and then turned away to look for my boyfriend to check on him as well. She told me that day that she felt that I brushed her off when she was having a difficult time and didn't console her enough.

It's just multiple things that made me feel that I need to be more on guard around her for her sake. She moved to another city recently and even before that we were texting less and less. I even asked her if she was upset about the cafe day and she said no since I apologized and we talked it out, but I could feel something in our relationship changed. It just felt like such a shame because I felt a great connection between us and I have massive difficulties when it comes to making friends. She was sort of my last friend that I felt close to aside from my boyfriend, and now I can't help thinking that the problem has always been me.

Sorry if the post was too long and sorry for the sob story lol

#aita #am i the asshole

[tibby]

i think it's partly bc of rerecording her albums and having fans love the vault tracks that she now feels she cant leave anything on the cutting room floor just in case

i definitely think that's part of it, but - and i say this as someone who likes a majority of the vault tracks - i think it was a good thing that they were initially left on the cutting room floor. including them originally would have detracted from what the albums were trying to say.

speak now and 1989 are the best examples of this. the point of speak now was two things: taylor wanting to prove she could do it on her own, and each song referencing a specific person or scenario. with the exception of when emma falls in love (the weakest of the lot imo) and castles crumbling (which has a feature), the SNTV vault tracks are more...vague in who/what they're about. and sure, if they'd been released on the original album with the secret messages we might have more context, but that isn't something we can say for certain. speak now is the only album that's about multiple people and we can pinpoint who or what each song is referencing (except maybe sparks fly which was included for the fans, and haunted but that could be because i've never cared enough to investigate if it's about john or joe).

as for 1989, i think the vault tracks are definitely stronger than some of the songs that made the cut (as much as i love WTNY and HYGTG, they're not her best work), but i don't think they would have fit into the story she was trying to tell. whether taylor successfully made an album that is about independence and not love is up for debate, but she claims that was her intention. IION and say don't go aren't great fits for that story, especially since it was one she was trying to tell within the secret messages.

i think red's biggest problem is that it was already too long of an album (which is also part of speak now's problem). i think the red vault tracks fit the theme of all the varying degrees of love, but red TV clocks out at over two hours. it's possible that forever winter in particular was too raw a song to release at the time (has she played it live yet? i haven't kept up with eras tour that much).

and while i love the fearless vault tracks, i do wonder if including them would have earned it less acclaim. they're good songs, but fearless is by far her most polished album imo. even the deluxe tracks, which i also adore, kinda take away from how well rounded the standard album is. it's very possible it's only capped at 13 tracks because cds back then could only hold so much, but i also think that it was a better decision for the marketing of the album itself.

but now, with ttpd and the eight million versions of midnights, it's harder to find the good shit because it's surrounded by so much filler. and yeah, part of it is that some of the songs on those albums are just...not good (bejeweled my deepest enemy), but i think a culling would have greatly benefitted them. ESPECIALLY with ttpd. taylor's always been songwriter who releases stuff that could be diary entries, but at least before it was like...you at least edited this. now it just seems like we're getting every single journal entry as is. and it's tiring. 31 songs is too much. hell, 16 songs for lover was too much.

ultimately i think it comes down to the fact that she no longer gets any push back from the people she works with, and fans are both willing to accept quantity over quality and (for many swifties, but not all) there's just a refusal to criticise her work at all. and i think taylor's desire to constantly release new content (which i think is a combination of a constant need for relevancy combined with the fact she's always writing) combined with being surrounded by yes men and adoring fans is impacting her work negatively. which has been the case since lover if not earlier, but i think midnights/ttpd are her most glaring examples of it.

anyway lmao sorry this got long. sorry for never being on here and then finally showing up to have opinions about taylor swift. do you guys still think i'm hot.

#ask #anonymous

[runawaymun]

I'm sure you'll get/have gotten other asks about this same thing, but I would love, love, love to know more about your ideas for a messy kidnap fam fic. :)

(also, accidently unfollowed when trying to hit the ask button. it's finally happened)

Ask me about my not-yet-written-fics from this list

The Messy Kidnap Fam Longfic

Under a cut for length

It all starts with Mae and Mags finding Elrond and Elros in Elwing's wardrobe post-oath-induced-rage fugue.

Elros and Elrond put up a hell of a fight to Not Get Taken and are absolutely convinced that a) Elwing has been murdered and b) they're also about to get murdered.

Maedhros gets bitten by Elros >:3

Mae and Mags have a debate about What To Do With them. I feel like maybe Mae initially is like "Put Those Back Where They Came From or So Help Me" at Mags, but the only idea they come up with is maybe leaving the twins at the edge of what's left of Sirion in the hopes that they'll be found (because if they tried to drop off the twins in person they'd get attacked on sight by Gil Galad and Cirdan). But Mae can't stop worrying that they'll die of exposure that way (he still feels awful about what happened to Elured and Elurin at Doriath).

They both realize at the exact same time that Elwing and Earendil Might Want Their Kids Back and Might Be Willing to Do A Lot to get them back, and so Elrond and Elros would be excellent hostages who could potentially be ransomed for a Silmaril.

So Elrond and Elros are very much hostages at this point. Mae and Mags do not really interact with them at all (save for Mags poking around in their minds to try and get some information out of them. Which Mae disapproves of but doesn't care enough about to stop him. He's in a bad way rn. Like his last other baby brother save Mags just died and he himself just participated in a massacre and he doesn't feel particularly good about it. They didn't even get a Silmaril and their own forces are fragmented post Sirion. My boy is barely keeping things together. They're together with duct tape and string at this point).

The twins are carted along the road back to Amon Ereb but kept under too heavy guard for them to be able to escape.

Also absolutely nobody in camp understands how to look after Peredhil. The twins do not get enough food to start with and they probably get sick from the elements, and this does go unnoticed for a WHILE.

They get back to Amon Ereb and are promptly put in a horrible little white room with a lock on the door. Again, Mae and Mags are not much interested with interacting with them at this point. Mags is a bit more interested but that's mostly because the twins remind him of Ambarussa and he's also emotionally unstable.

Mae sends ransom demands to Elwing, Earendil, and Gil-Galad, and they wait.

The twins are still hungry and sick, and convinced that they're gonna die. Also Mags keeps interacting with them and it's scary.

(They do get a window because keeping elves or elf adjacent beings away from view of the stars is unthinkably cruel, even for Mae and Mags. But they also still continue to be pretty neglected, and there is really nothing to do in that room. Elrond goes pretty catatonic at this point and Elros starts trying to tear holes through the drywall).

At some point it occurs to Mags and Mae that the twins are in poor condition and that's not really good when it comes to trying to ransom them.

They don't really know what to do though and so they consult some humans in their service, who are understandably like "uhhhhhhhhh they need more food and some medicine probably boss. Also it's kind of cold for them actually like sure it's fine for an elf but these are actual half-human babies).

Cue the twins finally getting some basic help. I have a vague idea that they bond with a human nurse that's sent in to look after them because Mae and Mags just cannot be bothered to Think About It.

Mae especially is pointedly staying away because it's too painful to be around the twins because a) they remind him of his brothers and b) they remind him of everything awful he's ever done and he can't handle that guilt.

Things continue to be Bad For A While.

Also I forgot to mention that Elrond and Elros have a poor grasp of Quenya at best, and so they really don't understand anything being said around them. They're picking it up fast though. Especially Elrond.

Finally a rejection of the ransom demands comes back.

What the fuck.

Mae absolutely goes into a rage over this because he literally does not know what else he can do. Because apparently Earendil and Elwing are on a boat somewhere with his father's Silmaril.

"What are we doing with the twins?"

Elrond and Elros are more convinced than ever that they're gonna get killed.

It's agreed that the twins should be dropped off somewhere to be found by Gil-Galad, and that trip begins. They likely send a letter to Gil-Galad announcing that they're returning the twins.

Gil-Galad has absolutely no reason to believe that the twins are alive and smells a trap. He does not come to pick up the twins.

Mae and Mags do watch (or have someone else watch) from a distance to make sure the twins are collected. The twins are not collected. The day wanes on into night. It gets really cold. The twins start bawling because they really think they're going to die now.

Mae really can't bear that and also at this point he's mad at everyone and everything.

They recollect the twins and decide that they're just going to have to look after them now until they're old enough to go back to Gil on their own.

Cue a very long tiptoe process of Mags getting attached to the twins and Mae refusing to (he's actually a big softie though so eventually he does).

I have way more ideas about later stages but this is already getting ridiculously long, sorry.

TLDR: (but I can elaborate more if people want me to): Mae and Mags finally start to get a grasp on Peredhil needs but wow is the damage done.

Elrond and Elros are veeeery slow to trust.

Super codependant relationship forms, with Elrond especially terrified of being left again because Mae and Mags are the only people who seem to want them now. Elrond starts emotionally regulating Mae and Mags just as much (if not more) than he used to for Elwing.

Mae and Mags get very attached to the twins and use them to cling to the last remnants of their personhood. This is not a good thing.

There's obviously more here I've thought this out very thoroughly.

Love grew between them but it was fucked from the start, essentially.

Also um something something the twins losing their Sindarin and not being raised in their Sindarin culture and essentially getting unintentionally completely colonized by Mae and Mags :/ icky and unavoidable.

#elrond #elros #maedhros #maglor #kidnap fam #do I think they loved each other? yeah #do I think they had a healthy relationship between the four of them? absolutely not #do I think that it permanently messed up Elrond and Elros? Yeah. #they carry that trauma the rest of their lives in subtle and not so subtle ways #Elrond does not fully regain fluent Sindarin until the second age #and his accent is permanently altered

[iheartsebastianmichaelis]

Stress.

⚠️: minors dni, sensorial uncomfort and corporal pain description, AFAB but gender neutral reader, fingering, mirror sex.

you have been very tense the last few days. social gatherings among the aristocracy did nothing but put you in a bad mood and stress you out when you lost track of the insignificant and trivial conversations among the nobles. you only attended for education, potential business partners, and the luxurious and unusual food they served, which clearly did not compare to the art that Sebastian had the luxury of creating in the kitchen.

on this occasion you were returning from a party with a baron whose name you had already forgotten because it seemed so irrelevant to you. maybe you had wasted time, but at least you could cross off one more item on your to-do list.

when you got out of the carriage and entered the mansion you were a mess: your hair felt sweaty, your suit was worn out, and your shoes had gotten dirty because of a clumsy waiter who tripped on you at the party. you sighed heavily, walking up the stairs towards your room while Sebastian followed behind you.

"your grace, i will prepare the bathtub with hot water to help you relax your body, in the meantime please wait in your room."

"okay, don't take so long."

"as you wish."

you entered your room and lazily began to undress, the cold of the night gave you a chill due to the abrupt change in temperature, giving you goosebumps. even with good weather setting your night, you couldn't get the frustration out of your body. so unbearable it was that even a slight pain in your temple appeared without warning.

a gentle knock on the door brought you back to reality, you knew it was Sebastian and with that an idea came to your head.

"master, may I come in?"

you were almost naked, only wearing your underwear but that was just a part of what you had in mind. with your head clear of doubts you nodded at yourself.

"sure."

Sebastian opened the door and his eyes widened in surprise. he never had seen his authority figure in such detail before, so it was only natural for him to ask your reasoning.

"good grief", he sighed "although I came here to inform you that the bathtub is ready, i can notice you weren't. i apologize if that's the case, i think it would be better for me to leave the room to give you more privacy."

"no, stay here. i wanna ask you something."

"how can i help you now?"

"i read on a book that people use to release stress with their bodies, do you know something about it?"

"i've certainly heard of that, your grace, humans usually can find relieve stimulating their bodies."

you sighed heavily as you placed your hands on your hips.

"I want to try it."

"oh? may i ask why, your grace?"

"are you seriously that much worried about wasting the bathtub water, Sebastian?" you asked teasingly, playful smile on your face. "there's no need to explain such easy understanding things, don't you think?"

he only chuckled.

you cupped his face with your hands and looked at him seriously.

"it's an order, destress me."

"yes, my master."

...

after a passionate making out session with your butler, you sat on the edge of the bed in front of your mirror, him before you and caressing your cheek with his hand.

he suddenly positioned himself on his knees in front of you and asked permission, with his exploring hands Sebastian waited for your response. a slight nod of your head was enough to give him the green light to continue. he made his way to your intimate area, leaving a trail of wet kisses, stopping right at your mound and giving a light bite to your thigh before retiring your panties. now, his sinful tongue began to trace a slow and pleasant up and down pattern on your slit. your mind felt foggy, his tongue was slightly making you feel more and more impatient when he thrusted vaguely into you or sucked on your clit vehemently. as time passed by and your moans became more loud he knew you were close to your climax so he stopped dead, surprising you and making you pout.

"i don't remember telling you to stop, Sebastian." you said frustrated.

"and I won't, excellency." he said with a calm, smug face while removing his gloves.

Sebastian then moved behind you, cradling you in his arms and slowly sliding them to your wet, sweet spot. starting with two fingers, he massaged your clit, giving gentle strokes and moving it in circles. your head was now tilted back and resting on his shoulder, soft whines leaving your mouth.

"oya, oya. someone's acting so eager already, aren't you dear?"

"s-shut up."

the clear and humiliating expression reflected on your face in the mirror was enough to motivate sebastian to tease and mock you.

you hissed and bit your lips every time he increased the speed or his strength in his movements between your folds. the moans you let out did nothing but invite him to continue taking them out of your mouth.

two of his long, thin fingers made their presence felt inside your wet interior, he thrust into you with confidence and strength, but not to the point of being painful or overwhelming. Just like he had said, you were excited. your hips moved back and forth, seeking to bury his fingers to your sweetest spot if that was possible.

"please keep going like that, haah."

"understood." he placed a kiss on your neck, making you tremble.

when he could deduce that you were close again, he moved his fingers faster and his thumb got busy giving soft and pleasant half-moons on your clit. your breathing became faster and your mouth got rid of all shame, letting out loud, pleasurable moans into Sebastian's ear.

"that's it, just follow what your body leads you to." he whispered into your ear before kissing and licking it.

suddenly you felt a chill and an energizing spasm run through your entire body, your back arched and your tongue slightly stuck out of your mouth. your legs were shaking and your chest was rising and falling: you had reached your orgasm. with your face burning with embarrassment you looked down and noticed the mess that was dripping onto his fingers that were still inside you. He gently gave small thrusts trying to prolong your ecstasy, you only hummed and moaned his name in response.

when Sebastian considered it was enough, he took his fingers out of you, kissing your neck and jaw, trying to massage your chest and collarbones with his clean hand, in order to help you relax your body.

"and... did this help you, your grace?"

you nodded frantically, but then noticed he got up from your behind and your back was surprised with the messy and warm sheets.

you looked up at him, noticing how he started to unbuckle his belt.

"I can try another method to destress you, excellency. just say the word, say my name and allow me to do the rest."

A/N: hii sorry for dying lol but happy season 4 for everyone LMAO!! I literally screamed and fell to the ground seeing profesor Michaelis 🤭 anyway, listen: i TRIED so bad to write actually smut but i swear i need to go bit by bit cuz i just suck 😭😭 sorry if this is so messy 💀

#Kuroshitsuji #black butler #sebastian michaelis smut #sebastian x reader #sebastian black butler #sebastian kuroshitsuji #sebastian michaelis #sebastian x reader smut

[eveningrainstorm]

my take on teenage raz and lili!

some design notes under the cut:

They're intended to be about 16 here! I didn't go for anything too drastic in terms of changes -- these are largely just what I'd consider natural evolutions of their canon designs

For Raz, my main focus besides just making him look older was to add a bit more resemblance to the other Aquatos in his design, since his relationship with them wouldn't be strained like it is during canon

Raz is shown with very straight hair in canon, but since most of his family's hair is more wavy or curly I tend to imagine he styles it that way on purpose as part of his Sasha Nein cosplay or whatever. He wouldn't still feel the need to do that at this point, though, so for this design I wanted to make it more curly, similar to Augustus or Frazie, while still similar to his canon style. This turned out to be incredibly difficult and I'm still not entirely happy with where I landed, but it's good enough

I didn't think he would still wear the helmet but I didn't want to discard it entirely, so the goggles were a compromise. I meant to give them some visible scratches and wear and tear since they're presumably the same goggles he's been wearing since he was 10, but I forgot. rip

Obviously the most notable change to Raz's outfit is the scarf -- I wanted something that would tie him visually to the other Aquatos while still fitting with his general look. I imagine they gave it to him as a gift, sort of an acknowledgement that even if he doesn't perform with them as an acrobat, doing his Psychonaut work is his own way of being an Aquato

Raz's outfit here is honestly very similar to his PN2 outfit. This is because in my eyes "long coat and turtleneck" is Peak Character Design and cannot be improved on. (Hence why I may not be the best person to redesign Raz.) He has an actual coat rather than just an oversized blazer this time though, so that's an improvement. With the turtleneck I was was vaguely intending for it to be color-wise something of a middle ground between the Sasha-style green striped turtleneck and the Aquato blue/green and white stripes, but it ended up basically just being the PN1 stripes with the PN2 color. which, you know, that works

I went back and forth on what their heights should be -- I thought it would be kind of funny if Raz ended up short and Lili ended up taller than him, but then I decided to just make them more in line with their families, with Raz being tall and lanky and Lili being average verging on short. Except then I accidentally made Lili tall anyway because I was only vaguely considering her height relative to Raz. I guess Lili's probably taller than her dad now? good for her ig

Most of their facial features are just slight variations of how they look in canon -- slightly smaller eyes and so on. the only real specific change is that Lili has a more defined nose now, similar in shape to her father's

Lili's outfit here is more different from either of her canon outfits than Raz's is, but there's still not much that really requires a ton of explanation. The goal was to make her look vaguely cool and fashionable, although as I am neither of those things I cannot guarantee I was successful

I tried a couple different hairstyles for Lili, and I'm still not entirely set on this one -- Originally what I settled on was to give her two braids, which I did like, but I kept doing sketches of her where I just drew the top part of the hair and was like "ngl this kind of works on its own" and so I ended up going with the short hair. I also briefly tried an asymmetrical haircut but I couldn't get it to look right. I think this one suits her though

Lili's tattoo (on her left wrist) was a later addition to the design, and even in the later stages of drawing this I wasn't sure whether to keep it. I like it conceptually I just haven't figured out a consistent design for it yet, only that it has to be of plants

god these notes got way longer than I meant them to be I am so sorry. Uh basically I'm still figuring out the details of these designs but for now here's Raz and Lili, they're teenagers now, thanks for reading

#still not completely set on these designs but i think i've mostly gotten an idea of what i want from them #i'll probably revisit them in the future. i'm happy with these for now tho #razputin aquato #lili zanotto #psychonauts #psychonauts 2 #my art

[andreal831]

I feel guilty: In some ways, I feel Hayley and the Mikaelsons set up Hope to fail. Now, with canon included, I think Hope did find her way - but ironically feel like her story should have been "Klaus, Hayley, and Elijah are what the remaining family tied to Hope but with the three dead - Hope is on her own, and having to navigate a world where she loves her dad but everyone is just as entitled to hate him and come into conflict with that". (Sorry, that's a long one). Basically because of how morally dubious the TVD gang (+ Dorian) could be - it makes sense that they know to separate Klaus's actions from Hope - but what about those who did not have that luxury and only remember a monster that was Klaus? I would use Tyler's story, but in a vague gesture: Hope needs to earn someone's trust after her father (or other relatives) brutalized them and has no way to defend or justify it. Essentially getting someone's trust for her as "Only Hope" and not the surname she's connected to. Or the more common arc, Hope realizing just because she loves her family doesn't mean she can overwrite the centuries of cruel history they left behind.

I'm not saying the Mikaelsons didn't love Hope, but Hope is unique (not just as a tribrid but the only living blood relative who hasn't been alive for a millennia) and had pressure on her that shouldn't be there. Hayley loved her, but should have warned her that living in a town that still had - living - people her dad fought with and hurt should have taken precedence over keeping a torch lit for their relationship. Klaus had his chance to be someone in this world, now Hope has to live in it and make something of herself - in his name or by herself.

(Sorry if this comes off anti. While I have anti thoughts and do like Hope, I think she could have stood to have a better characterized arc.)

I'll start by prefacing this and say that I haven't seen much of Legacies, I only know a lot of the show from edits.

But I agree that the show did a pretty terrible job with really diving into the cycle of trauma and pressures that were put on Hope since before she was even born. They were so focused on making Klaus redeemable and centering Hope around Klaus that they didn't allow for her character to have the development she needed.

I really like what I know about Hope's character and I even look past the wild hoops the writers had to jump through to make her existence possible. But for a show that centered around a magical, miracle baby, they sidelined her character a lot. The writers were so focused on setting up Legacies that they forgot to give the characters the development that was necessary for it to get there.

People love to say that Klaus broke the cycle of abuse with Hope, but he didn't. It just manifested in a different way. He never physically harmed her, but he neglected, abandoned, and emotionally harmed her repeatedly. This trauma is something that Hope doesn't even get to work through.

Hope at 7 years old seems more or less well adjusted. I think Hayley did a good job protecting her from everything. She missed her family in an abstract way because she didn't truly understand what she was missing. She had Hayley and Mary. Klaus allowing himself to be captured and held prisoner was the best thing he ever did for Hope. She was able to live for seven years safe and loved. I may get hate for it, but Hope was better off living as a Marshall away from the Mikaelsons.

I don't necessarily think Hayley was wrong for letting Hope grow up believing the best in her family. At that point, Hope was very isolated. She deserved to have a childhood without it being taken away by the Mikaelsons. But I do think Hayley should have had more conversations with her as she got older, especially if she was going to a school where it was likely to come up.

As soon as she is back with the Mikaelsons, her life once again revolved around what she can do for Klaus. I'm not saying they all didn't love Hope, but she was never allowed to just exist. The fact that she used to keep points when she was "good" or "bad" shows just how much she felt it. She had to be perfect because if she wasn't, she wouldn't be worth their sacrifice or Klaus might slip back into a terrible person.

I've talked about it before, but sending Hope to the Salvatore School made no sense to me. She was safer in New Orleans. She had her mother's pack, he vampires would protect her for Josh and Marcel, Vincent wouldn't let anything happen to her, and she had her mother. Hayley sending her daughter away to boarding school for most of the year made zero sense. I watched the first few episodes of Legacies before TO and I genuinely thought they all died when she was a child because of how she acted with Alaric and the twins. She desperately wanted a family, something Hayley had done a great job providing in the past, but sending her away to school made Hope feel neglected. She was already being neglected by Klaus, she didn't need to feel abandoned by both parents.

And, as you said, she is sent to a school that is run by a man who hates her father, in a town full of people who hate her whole family. She had to listen to people talking about how awful they were, and it was all warranted, which makes it worse for her. She didn't get to attempt to process that on her own. She had to do it while constantly being compared to her family. Alaric was always using it as a way to punish her. The adults clearly were not mature enough to separate Hope from what her family did and they had no business being in charge of her.

The entire terrible legacy of the Mikaelsons was put on Hope's shoulder and the show just ignored that trauma because if they didn't, they would have to admit that Klaus wasn't redeemed, everyone just moved on. So then the people who didn't just move on look like the bad guys. Alaric had every right to hate Klaus, Tyler would have every right to hate both of Hayley and Klaus. They don't owe the Mikaelsons anything, but it is also not fair that Hope has to take the brunt of their anger because Klaus died and got away with literal murder. Hope was a child and shouldn't have had to work to prove herself. She deserved love and support and understanding, like every other child. She deserved to have the space and support to sort out her feelings toward her family, the good and the bad. She deserved to yell at Klaus for abandoning her, to be angry at Elijah for putting that pressure on her, to be angry at her aunts and uncles for abandoning her after her parents died. She deserved to figure out who she was outside of the legacy of pain and torment her family left behind, but as far as I can tell, she is never given that time. All of this would have given her character more depth. Coming to the realization that her family were terrible people but she still loved them is a hard pill to swallow, but it was something she needed to come to terms with. Glorifying Klaus and erasing Hayley, did very little for her development except to play on Klaus' popularity for views.

I love the Mikaelsons but each and every one of them were terrible at being family and terrible people. Hope suffered because of this.

Thanks for the ask! Sorry if I just went on a tangent and didn't fully answer your question.

#hope mikaelson #she deserved better #but her family did truly love her #they just didn't know how to be a family #not really anti mikaelson #but just in case #anti mikaelson #i love them #but my god they were terrible for each other #the show never gave them the chance to fix their relationships #i wish we could have seen that development #tvdu #the originals #the vampire diaries #tvd #the mikaelsons #hayley marshall #klaus mikaelson #anon ask #fandom asks #tvd anon ask #tvd ask #fandom answers #tvdu metas #metas

[cutiewutiepatootie]

An Opportunity to be Remembered

this was a request 😎

___________________________________________ tags: really none unless you count the ending as smut. I mean it’s not directly smut, it’s more of something for you to make up, but that’s just if you interpret it that way. Uh….there’s teasing lmao

notes: Not at all proofread so if there is grammatical errors just try to read past them😭. Ellie’s so cuteeeRAGAHAHAJEJWJWKDGDHSJ

You had invited to ur best friend, Ellie, over just to casually hang out after school. The two of you had been friends forever so just asking one another to come over and do the same five things you guys always did when hanging out wasn’t anything new. But it seems as today, a new addition of “activities” would be added to your list. This started with the two of you sitting on the couch just watching tv and chatting when the topic of sexuality came up, and now, you’re sitting across from each other on your bed.  You knew Ellie had a few girlfriends before today, and you knew that she was more experienced than you. You can vaguely remember her last girlfriend, Dina, they were pretty good together when you think about it, but it just didn’t really work out.

“Why are we on my bed again?” You ask while giving Ellie a confused look. “I wanted to play truth or dare,” Ellie says, smirking back at you. “Are you serious?” you ask in a slightly sarcastic tone. “Truth or dare??”

“Yes, I’ll go first”

You knew Ellie could make up crazy dares. Like dares that could probably get you arrested, so you mentally decided to chose truth, but what was going to follow up your decision was way past your expectations.

“Truth or dare?” 

“Truth.”

“Have you ever kissed anyone before?”

You are shocked to say the least but you didn’t let it show. You weren’t just going to lie though. The answer was no, you hadn’t kissed anyone before.

“No, I haven’t.”

“I can change that.”

You two just sat there, you sitting with your mouth hung open and more shocked than before, and Ellie, just sitting there starring off into whatever was outside of the window behind you.

“I mean, only if you’re ok with it, I’ll guide you through it.” Ellie noted, seeming like she had just now realized what she said.

“Yeah, I do want to; I’ll just follow the expert.” You replied while looking down at your blankets, not daring to look up at Ellie.

“Alright, just relax, and close your eyes, I’ll do the rest for you.”

You obliged, closing your eyes and trying to relax yourself. It was easier said than done to relax, I mean, she had done this before so obviously it was easy for her to say. So, you just tried to put up a front and act comfortable, hopefully that ease down the amount of teasing you knew you were in for. But what can you say, this is Ellie Williams, in what world wouldn’t she tease you? 

You sat there for a few seconds not even feeing Ellie go an inch closer to your face. 

“I didn’t feel anything.” You spoke out, slowly opening your eyes. 

“That’s because I didn’t even kiss you yet.” Ellie Williams said, giggling a bit at the fact she had got you to just sit with your eyes closed for a little under a minute.

“Are you serious.” You commented, letting out an irritated sigh.

“Ok, ok, I’m sorry, we’ll try this again, but you really need to relax more.”

To no surprise, she noticed, but you weren’t about to waste more time arguing with her so you just sat with your eyes closed.

After what felt like hours, she kissed you. It wasn’t super quick nor passionate but it was enough to be considered a first kiss.

“How was it?” Ellie questioned, looking pretty proud of herself

“It was nice.” your reply was pretty vague. I mean, to start, it was more than just nice, the feeling was unexplainable. Second, you were already embarrassed, so why embarrass yourself more trying to think of the right words to explain it. 

“That’s all, just nice?” Ellie questioned, she didn’t seem mad or confused, more so just trying to get a reaction out of you.

“I don’t feel like explaining it, do you want to stay the night, I’m tired.” You ask, finally looking at Ellie as you lay down on your bed.

“Sure, but you’re not sleeping until I get more of an explanation out of you.” She said cheekily while laying down beside you and moving some of your hair behind your ear.

“Whatever.” You replied, surrendering yourself to whatever she was going to do with you, educationally, of course.

#Ellie williams #tlou #the last of us #the last of us 2 #tlou2 #ellie Williams x reader #ellie x reader #ellie x fem reader #ellie Williams x fem reader

[autumngracy]

Hi, just a random question from a fan of AROS (for which I have no coherent words to decribe my admiration)- I'm sure you've been asked this a million times already, but I'm quite new to this fandom, so forgive me and feel free to ignore the question, of course- who did you base your Javert on, appearance-wise?

Actually I don't think anyone directly asked this before!

To be honest I didn't actually base him on anything or anyone in particular ... I think the reason for this is because I read the brick before ever seeing any adaptations of Les Mis, so the first Javert I pictured was just my own interpretation of him from the brick ...

And what's funny is I can't remember if I originally pictured him with short hair or long hair. I read the 1938 Heritage Press edition of the brick, which is the Wraxall translation + about 1500 Lynd Ward illustrations, and in those illustrations he has short hair. But, oddly, I didn't remember it as being short in those illustrations? I had to go back and look years layer to confirm. (Alas, my beautiful Heritage Press copy is lost somewhere now!)

So I don't know if the long hair thing was me originally picturing it that way despite the illustrations being otherwise (possibly because the illustrative style made it somewhat vague at first?), or if it was from me later getting brainrot from looking at all the post Terrance Mann Javert designs ...

Best I can say about the hair issue is, well ... I just really happen to like male characters with long hair ... idk why lol. I have a lot of male OCs with long hair and every time I make one, part of my brain goes "Another one? For real? Do we not have enough of these little bitches already? If you don't stop putting long hair on all these characters people are gonna start to think you have some kind of kink."

Which. Well. I'm actually asexual so idk lol I think it's just an aesthetic preference

ANYWAY

For his wardrobe, that's just the brick descriptions plus factual research into 1830's era menswear. The only anachronistic element of his appearance really is his hair, but I do get around that by pointing out that he could have simply picked the (older and naval oriented) style up while he was at the Bagne (which did in fact have a dress mandate for keeping long hair tied up, suggesting it was a common enough hairstyle among the guards) and just never dropped it even after it became unfashionable—because A) he doesn't seem to give two shits about being fashionable, B) keeping short hair means either spending money to keep it short or having an intimate enough relationship with someone that they will do it for you free—neither of which I can see him wanting to do—and also C) he appears to be a creature of habit, so keeping the same, easily self-maintained hairstyle over the years fits my understanding of him.

Also, I'm not even exaggerating his tools of the trade because there really is a line in the brick about him having some kind of sword, which I had to go back and reread several times because it surprised even me (but it's 3am and I'm too assed to look it up rn). And we already know he has 2 pistols and a bludgeon (which the brick says he holds tucked up invisibly in his sleeve, Assassin's Creed style, lmao).

On another subject—

Given his stiff and distanced way of interacting with the world, questionable of social skills (see him bluescreening when Fantine is pleading with him in the mairie by way of what may be thinly veiled sexual advances), as well as his black and white thinking, penchant for being distracted by his thoughts to the point of complete obliviouness, propensity to either give extremely short responses or to go into ranting monologues, with little in between—plus the idea that he hates reading but makes himself do it for self improvement reasons, and how he seems to start stimming when lost in thought—I could definitely see him possibly being Autistic or having ADHD.

Now then, about his race ...

I know originally I actually pictured him differently than the Javert I wrote for my fic—as more white, at least—the way he appeared in the Lynd Ward until I read people discussing how he was probably supposed to be part Romani. And when it came to me having to pick conclusive character designs for my fic, I thought it would be much more interesting if it was a Javert who was visibly Romani instead of white passing, which he seems to be in most everything that bothers to mention his background.

I do find it weird that he's seemingly been played by nothing but white guys except for Norm Lewis and David Oyelowo (that I can find). So there's never really been a Romani Javert in stage or screen adaptations ... However, there's still a decent amount of fanart that shows him as darker skinned/Romani, so at least there's that.

Anyway I find that a visibly non white Javert just adds a lot more nuance and depth to his character, even compared to a still Romani but white passing version of him. Because then it changes how he interacts with and views the world (and vice versa), and it changes or adds to his motivations for doing what he does. It brings his (very canon!) struggle with internal racism to the forefront, which a lot of adaptations downplay or completely ignore.

I think part of why this appeals to me is that in modern times we are very used to the idea of the shitty oppressive white cop who is approaching everything from a position of absolute privilege and authority (which is a very shallow and uninteresting archetype, character-wise) ... and brick canon Javert, regardless of whether or not he is white passing, is not coming from a position of privilege—and not just because he is poor. He is coming from a position of social insecurity and vulnerability, which (at least it seems to me) he is trying desperately to escape/overcome.

And this makes his motivations for choosing his specific job far more interesting than "shitty white cop that enforces the status quo because he gets off on exerting power over other people". It suggests a sort of willful mental dissonance and denial that also make a lot of sense in hindsight when we consider the effects of his derailment.

The idea of him snapping and realizing for the first time that most everything he was doing was morally corrupt (or at least highly questionable) is one thing (and a level of obliviousness/ignorance that is somewhat hard to believe, imo) ...

But the idea that he knew how morally reprehensible his actions were all along, and was repressing it on purpose? To gain the only foothold he could see on the ladder of a world he was born on the lowest rung of? And after decades, is forced by external factors to finally, finally look his decisions in the eye and confront himself about them?

Well, shit. That hits a lot harder, doesn't it?

And it certainly hits him pretty hard. Obviously (as I pointed out in the the fic) he did mentally store away notes of things he found morally questionable about/during his career over the years—he just didn't let himself act on them. But it implies he was aware of the injustices, even if he only relegated that awareness to his subconscious.

The brick talks about how he felt he existed outside of society and had only two choices in life—black and white thinking; criminal vs protector, etc.—and it spells out how this is pretty much the direct result of his internalized rascism—so, I mean ... I don't think it's unlikely that canon Javert knew from the beginning that he was sacrificing his his heritage, culture, and moral compass in pursuit of respect and recognition from society (and thereby, social safety).

And in a Post-Seine world, he's forced to reconcile with all of that.

I may have just spoiled a major upcoming plot point for AROS tbh but oh well I was dropping breadcrumbs of foreshadowing about it the entire goddamn time lmao

#A Reflection of Starlight #AROS #Les Mis #Les Misérables #Javert #Tell me why I just spent 2 hours writing an essay in response to a *checks notes* single sentence ask

[bewareofthenewphannie]

Hey sooo could u pls share the twitter essay here👉👈

context

thank you for the ask, I'm honored that you want to hear my thoughts on this, and thanks char for sending your anon over to me!

okay, you see the thing is, the reason I blurred it out is a bit anticlimactic: I have no actual clue what I was talking about.

I don't actually know too much about this topic of what the dynamics between dannies and phillies looked like in the past because I've only been here since november last year and have never seen someone really discuss this in depth, I've only seen it being mentioned in passing. So everything I wrote was assumptions I made based on vague posts and my general understanding of dnp's and the phandom's history. I feel like this was enough to get the gist of this across to someone who doesn't really know dnp (apart from my previous elaborate ramblings about them) but not enough to post it on tumblr.

so if somebody has any input regarding this topic please tell me! and if I'm saying anything that's wrong (which is very likely) please correct me, I'm genuinely curious to hear thoughts on this by someone who actually knows what they're talking about :)

I will put what I wrote, along with some commentary, under the cut!

(addition: as I'm writing this commentary I'm realising how little I actually know, so please don't take this as actual information but more as...an interesting case study of how a new phannie perceives the history of the phandom)

first of all some more background info:

the original question was "[are there any people who] only like one of them and hate/don’t care about the other one?".

some shorter messages leading up to the long one seen in the screenshot:

there used to be a dannie/phillie divide but afaik all the way back in like...2013. now there are obviously people who prefer one of them but not in a way that they actively dislike the other one. and within the phandom I don't think there are really people who feel indifferent about one of them cause yk the thing is, these days it's impossible to watch one of them alone. dan doesn't use his channel, we wouldn't even see him if it wasn't for phil and even when he did a live stream thingy for his solo tour, phil was there. and phil either includes or talks about dan in every video he makes. so I guess either you like both or neither, you don't really have much of a choice also, they make it so goddamn obvious how much they love and care for and apprechiate each other and what an important role they play in each other's life, it would be kind of weird to claim to be a fan of one of them and then hate the person they like the most, yk

this was asked in the context of us talking about why there's this phenomenon that if you have a group of famous people who are strongly associated with each other (for example boybands or actors that work together on a tv show), there'll often be one person that is "hated" by the fandom. Their hypothesis was that this happens when "the one hated is either problematic, doesn’t like the other(s), or is more successful than the other(s)".

okay first the relevant part of my answer: I think overall you're right. I feel like if someone's more popular an important factor for them being disliked is that it feels like they think they're better/more important than the rest of the group. or if they all started out together that they don't apprechiate where they've come from, which both obviously hurts people who like that thing this person dismisses. but this also goes the other way, the people who like that person who is more famous often dislike the others in that group for being "jealous"/"leeching" off of the more famous person's fame.

and finally the thing you actually asked about, the long messages froom the screenshot broken up into multiple parts with the afore mentioned commentary:

now the less relevant part which is just me yapping about dnp and why this didn't happen to them I can imagine that at the very beginning some people probably didn't like dan because he was just some random dude, just another fan, who suddenly was part of youtube and attached to phil.

did...did this actually happen? it seems plausible to me, and I obviously know about charlie etc but how did people really react to dan suddenly being part of the AmazingPhil universe? I know it was an entirely different youtube culture back then and everything happened on a much smaller scale, so it's really hard to estimate how people reacted to this back then. in fact, now that I think more about it, judging from old screenshots I've seen, even at the very beginning people mostly seemed to be quite supportive of them and I think dan got an overwhelmingly positive reponse to uploading his first videos?

can't tell you exactly what went down after that but I do know 2012 was incredibly difficult (long story). things were very tense and especially dan was reallyreally defensive during that time and he had his whole "we're two seperate people" phase.

okay, so if there was any time in the phandom where there was serious tension between dannies and phillies it must've been during this time, right? because from recent discussions I know that there was a point where especially phil wasn't exactly treated the best but I don't know when that was. I feel like it would make sense here though.

anyway, at some point dan surpassed phil's subscribers and I genuinely don't know but I would assume that strengthened that dannie/phillie divide.

Again, I don't actually know when this happened (I would assume some time around 2013/14?) and I have absolutely no idea what the actual reaction people had to this was. but if I know anything about fandoms, this definitely must've stirred up...something. I don't know how obsessed the phandom was with numbers but even if it wasn't that bad, I can't imagine this happening completely without drama attached to it.

but one thing you need to know is that phil was always incredibly supportive of dan and the other way round, dan never talked shit about phil.

correct me if I'm wrong, maybe we simply don't talk about this time that much (with good reason) and I know dan said and wrote a lot of things that were very dismissive about some stuff etc. but in the clips and old posts I've seen he still emphasised that they were friends and didn't hate each other.

and thennn they started their bbc radio show, their joint channel, released a book, went on tour in 2015/16, basically they fully embraced their DanAndPhil brand. this was their peak in popularity and from what I've heard people say that joined the phandom at that time this dannie/phillie divide was basically gone by then because yeah, people liked their seperate things but what really made them blow up was the things they did together.

this is based on something I saw the other day. some people who I know joined the phandom around that time were talking about how they luckily never experienced that dan vs. phil mentality. that's why I wrote the things before this paragraph based on the assumption that the worst bit of the dannies vs phillies thing was before that era and kind of fizzled out by the time tatinof came around.

thennn the hiatus of the gaming channel, coming out (soulmates etc.), dan disappers from the internet (phil's just always there chilling btw). okay the most interesting part comes now, dan eventually writes a book and goes on tour. alone. now if we look at our hypothesis this would be the perfect reason for people to start disliking him, but not with them. phil goes behind dan's back to promote his book, before dan leaves on tour they make this video (https://youtu.be/2M2dF_21ANc) [edit: this is dilm in case you're wondering] where they keep talking about ohhh we've never apart for longer than to weeks oooh how will we cope blah, disgusting. dan makes a youtube series promoting the tour which phil is heavily involved with. and yeah, dan has this "I'm a strong independent dan" thing going on, but it's mostly part of his tour persona. (and also he did have to figure himself out for himself because he's been attached to phil since he was 18, so literally his whole adult life.)

I know some people disliked dystopia daily (which is valid but just for the record, I will defend her with my life) and I know some people generally didn't like/were disappointed with what dan was doing during that era. however. I know that's not representative of the whole phandom and I don't think (look at me assuming things again) those people truly hated dan for it but more like wished that things were different.

and then and then! after the tour nothing...until *drumroll* the gaming channel is back! aka, phil pushed dan to start making dapg videos again and dan's actually enjoying it. and they're fully embracing their DanAndPhil brand again. tl;dr I think the reason why this divide isn't there between them is [because of] how vocally and explicitly they support each other.

THE END

if you've made it this far, congrats, you get a cat! ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

I genuinely meant what I said earlier, I would love to hear more "qualified" opinions on this! feel free to add to this post, completely unravel it...or ignore it if I was too offensively wrong about things :)

#misty says thing #dan and phil #answered asks #phan

[lonesome-witching]

You Shouldn't Be

Robin gets bullied in this one. I'm sick and tired and I have an early day tomorrow so please forgive me.

Do you have any prompts yourself? Or do you want to dive into what I wrote before? You can read my previous prompts or send me some new ones.

It wasn’t anything new. That didn’t mean it stopped hurting. Some things never stopped hurting. Some things like her mom telling her that her rambling was a flaw. Or her classmates shouting insults she told herself every night. She wasn’t sure how they had figured it out or if they didn’t even now at all. Maybe they just thought this was the worst insult in the world. To Robin it might have been.

So, she did all she could. She kept her head down, avoided confrontation, bit her tongue when she had to, and she had to. She did everything to become as invisible as she could. She did everything, and yet it wasn’t enough. Because those vile words were still thrown her way. She couldn’t walk through the hallway without being confronted with it.

Tommy Hagan was the worst one. He never gave her a second to breath. Jason Carver wasn’t much better. Robin sometimes wondered what they got out of it. Maybe it was overcompensation.

“There’s dyke Buckley!” Jason shouted as Robin exited the building.

Her eyes scanned the parking lot. She knew Steve was somewhere around. He always was. He always parked in front of the school, he always picked her up. She couldn’t see him now.

“What’s going on, Buckley? Are you upset?” One of Jason’s friends was laughing. It made him sound like a broken record.

“Don’t you know you are supposed to look at the people who are talking to you?” Jason stepped closer. Robin stepped away.

“I think they should kick you out of school. I feel bad for all those poor girls that have to get changed in the same room as you. Do you stare at them when they take their bra off, Buckley? Are you a freaking pervert? You are disgusting.”

“I’m not disgusting,” Robin whispered to herself. She wasn’t sure she believed herself.

“You don’t think you’re disgusting, Buckley? You think it’s normal to get off to the image of your friends?”

“I don’t­—”

“Oh, fuck off, Jason.”

Robin turned around to see Nancy Wheeler approaching, her bag hanging off her left shoulder. She was wearing a pink skirt, and a light blue blouse and Robin vaguely registered it should look ridiculous, but it didn’t. Nancy looked great. Even despite the scowl on her face. Possibly due to the scowl on her face.

“This isn’t about you, Wheeler.”

“Well, frankly, I think it is. Because me and Robin have gym together. Didn’t you worry about the safety of the girls who shared a locker room with her?”

“What?”

“I have to say I can’t complain. I would much rather share a locker room with Robin than with you and your goons any day.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, at least Robin has some decency. Can’t be said from you. How many times have you asked me to fuck you again? And that whilst you have a girlfriend. What does Chrissy think of that?”

“You keep your mouth shut to Chrissy.”

“You leave Robin alone and I’ll consider it.”

Steve rushed forward. Robin wasn’t sure where he had come from. “Jason, back the fuck off.”

Jason’s eyes were still boring a hole in Nancy’s face. Robin could only assume he was debating whether or not she was bluffing. Robin doubted she was. She had never caught Nancy in a bluff before, and she knew Nancy wasn’t a good liar.

“Back off,” Steve shouted, pulling Jason away from them.

“Don’t touch me,” Jason shouted back.

“You better stay the fuck away from my friends, Carver.”

“You’re pathetic, king Steve.” But Jason turned away.

“Are you alright, Robin?” Nancy asked first, placing her left hand on Robin’s arm. It felt far too intimate for a public parking lot.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. I’m used to it.”

“You shouldn’t be,” Steve chimed in.

“Steve’s right,” Nancy agreed. Her hand fell back down.

“It’s alright, guys. I’ll survive.”

Robin walked away in what she hoped was the direction of Steve’s car.

#prompts #ronance #nancy wheeler #robin buckley #steve harrington #my work #stranger things #fanfic #robin x nancy #nancy x robin #ficlet

[thecrowsart]

👁️🦎🎯

(crops under cut)

#natsume yuujinchou #matoba seiji #natori shuuichi #horrible exorcists #sorry i couldnt think of a caption i literally sat here for like 2 minutes lol #usually i use a quote from the scene or a lyric from a song but in this scene they're just Looking #anyway FUCK architecture #really though this is csp's perspective ruler's fault. i shoulda just done this by hand #but i made it work. since it wasnt super super complicated lol #ummm i feel like natori looks like a baby ceo but that is what he was wearing at least in the anime version of this scene #and midorikawa's kind of vague about clothes so i made it easy on myself #but why are you rolling up to the exorcist meeting in a navy blazer and tan chinos? #his uniform color is tan so ig the pants could be from that but the blazer...... #tryna represent the natori clan in front of the other exorcists ig idk #meanwhile matobas just in his gakuran lol #hes not the clan head yet so he can just be there as a kid #he even gets told off by takuma and called seiji-kun.....could you imagine like. #it's weird for him to not be matoba #anyway. um i completely kind of fudged the architecture because its hard to tell where exactly in the building this scene is and #i had a specific composition in mind #i only realized i messed up how the windows work like 3/4 of the way into lineart soooo #but thats the kind of thing only i would notice probably #btw i was originally drawing a different scene of them but i was faced with the reality of foliage. #and i remembered this romeo and juliet ass scene existed so #i chose architecture LOL #okay last thing. i feel like natoris haircut is too polished and nice but fr wtf is his canon hair #im doing my best LOL.........but boy #OKAY im done

[skunkes]

unsure how to word this but there is something about having ocs with unsavory events happening in their past where it's like. talking about it, even when asked, seems almost gratuitous and inappropriate. and i'd much rather describe it through the oc themself and/or draw Them saying it. which is like. fitting for the subject matter? like of course its weird to talk about somebody else's business...!

and falls back into humanizing em/exploratory writing and development where u consider the impact of words said/words unsaid/HOW those words are said etc etc

#because not all real persons would give u every detail of their trauma obviously #which makes sense but im an overexplainer but also it feels inappropriate to overexplain when it comes to dis #i hope that makes sense #talkys #i once described what went down with al as just directly as possible and it still felt weird. ykwim?? idk why. #well i do know why! i dont want it to seem gratuitous or like That Cheap Writing Element. fine line #same with talon so he'll just keep implying it thru text + dialogue which is how it should be ! #the only difference is i think with al i wrote it like he would've said it bc he has more access to that side of himself #and is aware of how it affected him #whereas characterwise talon absolutely would just speak in riddles about and around it #i don't even think he's conscious about the direct effects of it #(but i wouldnt know bc he hasn't made that known to me in my brain) #people respond differently to different things and all that #also im so sorry if half the shit ive said recently is so like. Well Duh. i havent made a new oc in a decade gimme a break LOL #also i realize the. irony? of me even vaguely talking about it in the way i did but 1. i think that's also realistic when you #dont want to do a whole deep dive on someone else's business and 2. people are becoming #curious about my oc(s) and im just thinking about well; significant events and how to handle not speaking about em #FOR them. <- weirdly #idk. they're real to me. #its just so much more interesting to leave it up to them! people can lie people can downplay

[milkbreadtoast]

ai is just so fucking bleak man it makes me want to end it all...

taking everything joyful about life... everything i ever wanted or loved or hoped for... and not just that, everything else too... no job is safe... the only way i can go on is to pretend it doesnt exist and just keep creating and trying as we always have done it haha but meanwhile it just keeps getting worse and im filled with sickening dread... the only hope I have is that people will continue to stick together and protect each other even as ai tries to destroy and take everything from us and our identity and our joy sorry to sound poetic and pretentious but i just need to get the vent out. its bleak man.

#im being vague bc im embarrassed to specify more but it just... the future seems so bleak bc of ai #and... this is just one small thing #everything about the current world and the future looks bleak to me #the only way i can keep going on is if i pretend everything is fine and the same as how it was #but the fact that i can even manage to do that shows my immense privilege #vent #delete later #sidenote i havent been glazing or art shielding my art (i never tried glaze) #because i just... i give up man. like im in denial. i want to just pretend like i can post it like normal and itll be ok #i want to blindly trust #its the same w me posting my art and blindly trusting that ppl wont repost #except ai is much worse than reposting.... #ha... the only meager protection ive been doing #is watermarking but not even obtrusively #and posting at a lower res (but ive been posting higher res on here...) #hhaaa... i want ppl to be able to see my hard work and tbe colors #and artshield makes tbe colors ugly #cries #unrelated but i feel like ive been estranged from my friends lately too #so thats prob also contributing to why i feel so sad #im too old to be having a tantrum like this but isnt this what blogs like tumblr r for? so i can vent here instead of irl... ha ha