#the audacity!

[kneelingshadowsalome]

On my knees BEGGING for more of off the grid!König.

This is sooo self indulgent you wouldn't even believe 🥲🌲

He doesn't need to keep himself in shape, splitting and hauling wood all day does the job + he hikes a wide perimeter around your cottage to check the traps. Fixes everything from your old Jeep to the roof of your small house that luckily stays warm even during winters because the logs he picked are extra thick.

You still beg for more cuddles in the morning, not wanting to leave your warm nest of a bed. König sometimes has to rip you off him because seriously, Liebling, he has so much to do – only, his Achilles' heel is you, so the giant beast of a man tumbles back to bed to squeeze and tease you more than a few times before strolling to prepare some coffee on the stove.

Finally, he can walk around naked when there's no neighbours... The only "con" is that you're still teasing him about it, and bullying – when it comes from you – has a tendency to make him hard. Now look at what you did, woman... Can't a man even brew his coffee in peace? How is he supposed to get anything done with a boner like this??

If you throw a pillow at him – he's the one being indecent here, waving that horse dick around and almost poking someone's eye out with it! – he catches it and marches back to the bed to punish you. The punishing session makes you cum so loudly he has to kiss you silent, saying you're going to make him deaf one of these days, but you know that he's only pleased. In a quiet, calm place like this, your screams are only the music of angels to him, evidence of how good he is at keeping you warm, fed and satisfied.

After fucking you nice and tame he can finally start his day without distractions, whistling by the time he puts on the sturdy workpants and searches for his shirt. It's just so typical, him accusing you of distracting him while walking on cloud nine right after dipping his dick in you... But you're not complaining: still lying in the bed, happy as a worm after rain from what he did to you.

It's unfair that he's walking around like lovemaking was only another job scratched off his to-do list while you feel like you just got hit by a bear. Nasty man, who's in far too good shape compared to you... But then the nasty man brings you coffee to bed, and calls you a spoiled princess – living off the grid was supposed to be hard work but here you are, lounging on your soft down pillows like a queen while he does all the chopping and fishing and fucking :)

You know the man is more than happy when he feels useful and needed, and you do your share too in the garden that is simply flourishing this year, but you still blurt out that he should be grateful for having a woman to keep him warm. No sane girl would ever come to this secluded place and live with a horny nudist like him...!

König just kneels next to the bed and whispers in your ear: "It's a good thing you're not sane then..."

#the audacity! #he gets thrown with a shoe next! #off the grid!könig #könig fluff

[ghostlyarchaeologist]

Leverage S03E01 The Jailhouse Job.

#leverage #eliot spencer #christian kane #he's so offended someone would even think about firing a gun in his presence #the audacity! #ghostly'sgifs

[the-dormant-ocean]

Not Rei insinuating that Kazuki has no stamina as if he didn't carry him and Miri while he was full-on sprinting.

#the audacity! #buddy daddies #buddy daddy spoilers #buddy daddies ep 9 #kazuki kurusu #rei suwa #kazurei

[kanafinwe-makalaure]

A little snippet from a random wip i probably won't finish:

Nerdanel’s third son was ill-received upon his birth. For fairness’ sake, it must be said that he came into the world three weeks late, and so, of course his mother was not to blame for screaming at the midwife to “get this giant thing out of me or so help me”, nor was Maitimo to blame for having his important exam that day and finding the baby’s timing incredibly inconvenient. It was, after all!

However, the poor child’s physicality was no-one’s fault at all. Not only did he bear an unlucky resemblance to his grandmother Míriël, which put both Fëanáro and Finwë into some sort of mood, but, perhaps even more unluckily, he was not a sister. Makalaurë wept and wept and could not be consoled.

Fëanáro sat down with him.

“You said you wanted a little brother or sister,” he reminded him.

“But I knew in my heart that I wanted a sister!” Káno bawled through tears and snot. “I only ever wanted a little sister, and not a stupid little brother!”

“Now, now, that’s not very nice! We don’t know yet whether he will be stupid.”

“We know! He’s already stupid because he wanted to be a brother when I wanted a sister! He’s stupid and mean!”

Káno broke into even more violent sobs, then; Fëanáro simply pulled him onto his lap, where the poor child clung onto him as if for dear life. He rubbed soothing circles on his back until he relaxed, going all limp from the exertion, and began to hiccough.

“You know,” Fëanáro tried after a bit. “You may be disappointed now that you didn’t get a sister, but you do have a little brother now. If you go inside to meet him, and you hold him in your arms, your souls will meet and connect; you will be united as brothers. He will love you with all his little heart, and you will love him so much, too. Enough, surely, to forgive the fact that he’s not a sister.”

“Do you think so?” mumbled Káno miserably.

“I do think so.”

A deep sigh. “All right.”

#maglor #feanor #celegorm #silm fic #sons of feanor #nerdanel #maedhros #my writing #fic snippet #how dare baby celegorm #the audacity!

[stardust948]

We finally got Rosegarden in Vol 9 but AT WHAT COST?!?!

#and during rosegarden week too #the audacity! #rwby #rwby spoilers #rwby spoiler tag #rwby rosegarden #rosegarden #ruby rose #oscar pine #ruby x oscar

[wrestlezaynia]

Gable on Raw last night:

#How dare Sami celebrate his victory with his wife? #The audacity!

[giggly-squiggily]

Wow he really did just took all his anger out on Nezuko didn't he? ToT

How dare you hurt the baby Tengen!! >:((

He really said “F*ck your Nezuko!” And just YOINKED! 😭😭😭 Sanemi I expect it from- but Tengen???

I have a Chigiri one but I’m gonna wait and order a backup in case Tengen comes back 👀😅 If he breaks that one, I’m deeming him unflashy! 😤

#squiggily speaks #ask #fanfic-chan #friend :3 #Tengen pop socket chronicles #the audacity! #😭😭😭 #I’ll probably turn it into a pin maybe 👀 #get some hot glue and a few pins- stick it on my bag #that’s be cute 🥰

[formulaonedirection]

Never forget what Chelspurs is all about

Win or lose we are going for most violent no matter what 🙏🏽

#time for bed so i can get up at 4am #that hair pull genuinely makes me open mouth loudly CACKLE every single time #the audacity!

[lacallemojada]

Stefania's not hot. Danielle is so so so much better!

Anon, don't come into my house to tell me Stefania Spampinato is not hot. First, you shouldn't compare women, you like Danielle more? That's okay, you have your opinion and likes as I have mine. But the fact that you like her more doesn't make the rest less than her (at least physically speaking). Second, Stefania being hot doesn't mean that Danielle isn't hot, both of them are very very hot indeed.

And please, next time refrain from sending me these kind of messages. Thank you.

#ask #anon #THE AUDACITY!

[ryusxnka]

DEATH BY BASKETBALL / TYBW COUR 2 OPENING!!

#;My gifs #;The ash #;The burner finger #;The winter soldier #The audacity!

[necrofuturism]

being straight up admonished by my fortune cookies tonight lads

#the audacity!

[gemscales-and-tea]

I'M BEING NOMMED!!!!

#ooc #The audacity! #asks

[emeraldbabygirl]

Can’t believe the rampage went from dancing inside woman to dancing on top oF RETRO ASS FUCKING CARS HOW DARE THEY STEP ON THEM AND LEAVE SCUFF MARKS ON THE HOOD AND ROOF DO THEY NOT UNDERSTAND THE ARTS OF VINTAGE CARS DO THEY NOT UNDERSTAND THEY COULD RUIN THE CARS HOW DARE THEY MEN AINT SHIT AND SHOULD BE BANNED

#the rampage from exile tribe #exile tribe #how dare they #if I saw them dancing on #IT WAS A FUCKING EL CAMINO AND WHAT LOOKED LIKE A BUICK OR VINTAGE LINCOLN #ID LEG SWEEP THEY ASSES AND THEYD EAT SHIT #HOW DARE THEY 😠 #I’m only sort of joking #they cars can’t be real can they? #the pressure on the cars bro #if poom had to even his weight on a 60’s vw bus but this mfers get to waffle stomp on theirs #the audacity!

[rodismancave]

I’ve got a nice aft. Come on.

#cocking his hips. tapping his feet to the floor. #the audacity!

[community-stuff]

This is a buzz hickey hate blog btw

#community #buzz hickey #and the show acted like accidently ruining someone’s project is equally bad to handcuffing someone to a file cabinet #the audacity! #he sees his friends not purposefully triggering meltdowns as ‘walking on eggshells around him’

[yaoist]

genuinely I respect you so fucking much for HPosting on this site that has never heard of being normal about liking/disliking something and that has never known a shred of nuance

tbh its lowkey insulting people feel like they can tell me what i can and can't read

#the audacity! #also nothing can stop my brainrot