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freetobeeyouandme · 2 years

Video

Mike’s Monologue (Actually Romantic Version)

Hey y'all! So, a lot of the analyses I've seen about the monologue and things I noticed about it myself as to why it sucks ass were kind of just easily fixable things related to the editing of the scene. And because I have an editing software and thought it would be a fun way to practice...I fixed it. So here's what Mike's Monologue could have looked like if they had wanted it to be actually romantic.

Notes and process under the cut.

- Everything I used (except flashbacks) is from the original ~4 min sequence from them pulling El out of the water to her sending Henry flying (I’ll reblog with a link in a second)

-My version is ~3 mins long, shaving off a whole minute from the og. I did that by cutting out everyone else who intrudes on the scene, which is Will and Max but also shots of Lucas, Hopper, Eddie and Dustin in distress after the bulk of Mike's speech

-The ending is super interesting because El looks at Max and then frees herself, but as she does so we leave the mindscape and Surferboy’s: We cut to Max irl, getting her bones broken, Lucas beating Jason to go stand and look at Max dying, a shot of Hopper with a snarling demodog on top of him, Eddie getting eaten and Dustin calling out for him, and then back to Max and Lucas. Only then do we cut back to Mike still yelling "fight!" and El falling off the wall sending Henry flying. Which imo emphazises that this isn’t the kind of romantic love saves the day scene that it should have been if it was meant genuinely. It’s El remembering Max is in danger that pushes her to fight, not Mike, which is why we see all of her friends in danger as she frees herself. It’s not just Will between them in this scene, it’s everyone.

-Cutting all that was relatively easy because at this point Mike just keeps repeating "fight, El" so no dialogue was lost and I didn't have to futz with the audio

-Similarly cutting Will's prompting Mike was also so easy to cut, which just shows how unnecessary it was. Which, in turn, just hammers home how suspicious it is

-I simply covered Will and Jonathan's reactions to "hurt more" with a reaction shot for El, eliminating further intrusions on the scene by others

-The montage includes 15 different clips of memories, which is more than El has when she restarts Max's heart (10) and about the same as Max during Running Up That Hill (16).

-Making the montage made me realize how jarring the constant back and forth between Mike and El becomes, especially towards the end of the monologue, after that first memory: During Running Up That Hill we focus solely on Max after the boys put on Kate Bush, only cutting to them once when Max starts to float and even then Max is still in the picture, because we're in her head and need to see how she feels and how she's escaping. I tried to imitate that with my montage, but it's interesting that in the real version we get dragged back to Surferboy's and see Mike talk, making the scene not just about El and her fight to escape but also about Mike performing (when he should become just a guiding voice like the song)

-El's reaction in the montage except for the laugh after the t-shirt mention are all from after the monologue

-The most immediate and drastic change imo was when I changed the background music. Even without the montage the cut already works so much better with "Unambigious True Love" playing instead of "You're The Heart"

-I didn't have to do anything fancy to make the new song work. I simply underlaid UTL so the track lined up with the fade to black and it fit basically on the first try. The length spans the entire monologue, slowly building up and then cresting during the montage and falling as Mike calls for her to fight and the vines fall away. It would literally have been the perfect track to use instead of making up a new one and then naming it after Will's feelings.

-There are still a couple of things about the monologue that I couldn't fix, such as lighting, shot composition (Will is still visible over Mike's shoulder for example) and the actual text, which is still a bit weird, but overall doing this was very interesting because it made me think about what we should have seen if they wanted this to be genuine and the difference between what I ended up creating and what we saw on screen is stark.

In conclusion: They’re bones

#Byler #anti mileven #stranger things #stranger things 4 #mike wheeler #eleven hopper #video edits

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sevnation · 16 days

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my redacted top ten! (listener edition)

1. angel, all i post about on this account is angel. theyre just like me fr and i have so many plots and headcanons for them (theyre a stoner, theyre from a hunter family, blah blah blah) but i also love the way they interact with david, perfect match imo.

2. sweetheart, whats not to love about sweetheart. sassy, break in master, most powerful stealth in the redactive universe to date, and they’re dating milo!

3. fool!freelancer specifically. fool!freelancer is so attractive i was literally acting like gavin the whole video. if fool!freelander walked up to me in a cafe we’d be in the bathroom in 20 minutes

4. doc. i love doc. theyre so morgan coded its insane and they treat hush with such gentleness (hush, the serial murderer)

5. lovely. NOW DONT GER ME WRONG. i love lovely so much, theyre my baby and they deserve better. however, i cant listen to the vincent audios without crying. my baby gained powers after almost being killed, losing said powers and ACTUALLY DYING, and is now living life as a dead person. me and vincent wouldve been scrapped

6. darlin. same as lovely, cant listen to sam’s playlist beyond the ‘alpha and mate have a talk’ because it makes me break down into tears.

7. starlight. avior and starlight COME HOME ITS BEEN 2 MONTHS AND 1 WEEK. but anyway, theyre not low because i dont like them, theyre low because i like everyone else more. starlight my sassy king

8. baabe. NOW LISTEN PLEASE LISTEN DONT GRAB ME PLEASE. i love baabe sm theyre so sweet but ASHER HAS LITTLE TO NO AUDIOS. I DONT KNOW PLS. i love baabe and ash tho my bbs

9. bestie. STAND UP. STAND UP NOWWW. this made is a CULTIST AND YOU KISSED HIM. YOU GOT CULT COOTIES.

10. asset / cutie. no explanation.

#redacted asmr #redacted angel #redacted audio #redacted david #redacted baabe #redacted sweetheart #redacted darlin #redactedverse #redacted hush

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chrollohearttags · 4 months

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Cherry, I want to ask you something, but idk if this is appropriate for your ask but I'll ask you anyways...

It's involving maturbating so yeah you've been warned 😅

So recently, I got me a rose and a dildo right😩 cause I'm a virgin, and I just wanted to see if I could get turned on or not, so I basically putting the rose I my 🫘 and it feels nice or whatever but u don't get wet 😗 so I'm just like 'ok maybe I should try the dildo' so my dumbass is just sitting over here baby oil on my dildo trying to insert it in my hole but I can't barely put it in :( mostly because I wasn't horny. So then I turn on

🌽orn and stuff and I watch a couple of videos, but nun of that turns me on, even tho what they were doing in the video looked nice but like I just wasn't getting turned on, like no wetness between my legs at all ☹️ so my question is

Is something wrong with my body, or am I just not attracted to men and women sexually?☹️😭😭😭

I'm doing this anonymous bc I'm afraid ppl will judge me :\

hey sweetness!! trust me, ur totally fine! (my ask box was looking like a sexxy red comment section a couple weeks ago so it’s all good 😭) but no need to be embarrassed or afraid, we’re all grown over here and this is a safe space so we should be able to talk abt these things. Trust, big sis Cherry got you! First thing, baby oil is like the huuuugest no no! never EVER use that as lube bc it will cause all types of infections and nobody wants that. As far as the rose or any vibrator for that matter, it’s not, at least imo, meant to stimulate you but rather add to the pleasure. So in other words, if it’s not already feeling like Niagara Falls, don’t even bother with it cause it’ll just feel like burning rubber. (sorry for the graphic but yeah! 😭)

and there is not a single thing wrong with you!!! please don’t ever feel like you’re not doing something right because you’re not in the mood at the moment. Nobody walks around horny 25/8, and if they are..well idk. The best thing you can do is not force it. Sometimes the thought may be there but the urge is not and when you’re not mentally and physically synced, it’ll just make it that much harder to enjoy (and make it painful!) also, those videos are incredibly staged and just viewing it sometimes doesn’t do it so my suggestion: try audios!! asmr, guided stuff, etc. for me personally, it helps soooo much more. Because idk about you, but it’s hard for me to watch two ppl I don’t know and get turned on. The sounds do it for me because I feel more connected. The best advice I can give though is RELAX, take time to learn your body, learn your ticks and dislikes, don’t force it and just have fun. Focus on other parts of the body (nipples, skin contact, etc) Always clean your toys and use water based, SAFE lubes and always ALWAYS go to the bathroom after using them to not get UTI’s. From one virgin to another, sis, wishing you well and that it gets better for you! 🫶🏾🥰

#cherry’s asks 🍒#nonnies 🍒🌹#love you nonnie <333 #wishing you the best

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hamletthedane · 24 days

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I’m a big Hamlet fan and I am curious as to what your favorite movie/for screen rendition is? I’ve been working my way through a lot of them, gone through about 7, so far Hamlet at Elsinore with Christopher Plummer is my favorite. I was just curious what yours is !

What a great question!!

Hamlet at Elsinore is definitely my favorite filmed version of the play. I feel that Christopher Plummer does a fantastic - and frankly critically underappreciated - job of portraying the more nuanced and complicated aspects of Hamlet's character while still giving a straightforward performance that's highly accessible to any audience. Notably, he doesn't treat the performance as his ~*~epic, defining role of a lifetime~*~ or ~high artistic theater~ (*cough* Branagh and Jacobi), but instead focuses on telling a deeply compelling, very moving story about the complex nature of grief and revenge. I also like that this version embraces the more "postmodern" elements that exist in the written text of Hamlet: the complicity of the audience, the inevitability of the outcome, Hamlet's genre-awareness and genre-defiance, etc.

[Not to keep hating on Branagh, but in contrast: Branagh's Hamlet in particular seems to go out of its way to avoid including the more interesting proto-postmodern thematic elements of the play - at times not seeming to recognize that they're even there. He instead focuses his time and energy on inserting new cinematography-based visual themes that go nowhere and at times stand in OPPOSITION to the actual tone and themes of the original text. Because apparently Hamlet the play is too boring and instead of lame elements like "themes" and "compelling characterization," we need a swinging chandelier sword fight scenes and Freudian weirdness. Truly the Joel Schumacher Phantom of the Opera adaptation of Shakespeare films. But I DIGRESS-)

Plus it doesn't hurt that everybody aside from Plummer in Hamlet at Elsinore is also fabulous. Obviously, Michael Caine's Horatio is the single best and most definitive version of the character in film, but I also love Robert Shaw's Claudius and Muller's Ophelia.

If we're talking favorite filmed versions of the STORY of Hamlet though, that's Asta Nielsen's silent film from 1921. It's so beautifully filmed and wonderfully told. She's what I picture when I picture Hamlet.

Other than that....I like Tennant and Stewarts' RSC filmed version well enough. It has a number of very strange choices and I don't love the re-ordering of the scenes, but Tennant does a great job with the character and I think it's a very approachable performance. A few other filmed stage versions are also excellent, though with a few similarly weird elements - I'd put Maxine Peake's version on the same tier as the RSC version. I do NOT like Branagh's version at all (if you couldn't already tell...). Jacobi's and Gibson's are slightly better, but they're still too focused on the prestige of the performance rather than the actual story being told imo. I think they fall under the same criticism as Holden Caulfield's scathing review of Laurence Olivier: "more like a general than a sad, screwed-up type guy." (Yes I know this line is an in-text authorial critique of Holden himself but also: he's right and he should say it.)

If you haven't already, I do highly recommend listening to the BBC Radio 4 audiodrama version of Hamlet, starring Jamie Parker. Despite being a audio version of a stage play, it somehow blows every filmed version of Hamlet (except maybe HAE) out of the water. I listen to it at least once a year.

Finally, my actual favorite versions of Hamlet have ALWAYS been those I've seen live (or seen bootleg filmed stage performances of lmao). If it's ever playing live near you, definitely go and see it. The play was meant to be seen on a live stage in front of you, and many of the jokes and themes only make sense in that context. In my opinion, the medium of live theater elevates the play so far beyond what a movie could ever achieve.

...sorry this answer is so long 😅 Really, it doesn't matter what my opinions on Hamlet films are. If any version of the play really speaks to you - even if it's the accursed Branagh version - that is so awesome and makes me really happy people are engaging with the play in that way! (But since you're saying that HAE is your favorite so far, I will add that you have excellent, discerning taste ;))

#hamlet #willy shakes #'not to keep hating on Branagh-' I say like it's not been the leitmotif of my blog for over a decade #I cannot help myself. any opportunity I am throwing down.#shut up e #shakespeare after dark #should we bring that tag back? I feel like we should bring that tag back

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rushingheadlong · 7 months

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Today is the 30th anniversary of Brian’s concert at the Palace Theater in New Haven, CT, USA. And since this is my favorite solo show Brian has ever done, I wanted to finally put together a proper post about the concert and why I love it so much.

First, a bit of background about the tour in general… For about 40% of the shows on the tour, the Brian May Band was not the main act at all. From late February to early July 1993 Brian was touring almost exclusively in support of Guns’n’Roses; they had some shows during this time where they were the headlining band but those were (generally) few and far between. It wasn’t until October 1993 that Brian set out on a tour that was exclusively his, with the Brian May Band as the only headliner and with no other support bands joining them.

It’s also important to remember that nearly everything about solo touring was entirely new to Brian, and while he can look back on it all with fondness now that ‘newness’ did cause legitimate issues during the tour itself. One of the biggest recurring problems was the new wireless system they were using for the Red Special.

(Brian, sans curly lead, at Brixton Academy)

The lack of cable meant that Brian had the freedom to move around that he needed as a frontman, but it also meant that they were dealing with constant signal issues and interference. And by “they” I mean Brian and a temporary guitar tech, because this tour took place after Jobby left but before Pete Malandrone came along.

So, with that out of the way… Why is this my favorite Back to the Light concert?

Well for one thing, it’s the best quality bootleg we have from the tour. Really the only video that’s in better quality is the professionally-filmed Brixton Academy show, and that one was edited for release to remove the explicit ending to Love Token and Brian’s cover of “God (Dream Is Over)”. In fact for the longest time the October New Haven show was pretty much the only source we had for “Dream Is Over” at all because it was never performed when they were touring with GNR.

So even though there weren’t any special one-off songs during the New Haven concert, this is really the only easily-available (i.e. on youtube) bootleg we have that includes the original full setlist and the complete encore. Some sections of video are missing, but they’re generally short moments between songs; very little of Brian’s actual performance is missing, and even better the audio quality is fantastic as well.

That's not to say that it's a perfect bootleg, or even a perfect show for that matter. The technical issues that were endemic to this tour are absolutely present here too, from Jamie’s guitar not coming in on his solo to major tuning problems with Brian's acoustic. But IMO that doesn't detract from things too much at all, because the band is far enough into this whole production that they know how to work around these things. You can see those moments when Brian gets frustrated but it doesn't get the best of him, not like it did in South America:

(Brian frustrated by technical issues in Chile)

By the time October 1993 rolls around the Brian May Band is a well-oiled machine. They know how to brush off the mistakes and cover for the inevitable problems that happen during any live show. And when things are going alright for the band and Brian looks more happy than not during shows, it's sometimes easy I think to forget how very not alright Brian still was on a personal level.

Because this final stint of touring kicked off less than two years after Freddie's death. The therapy that Brian found through Back to the Light wasn't in the making of the album, which was nearly finished before Freddie died, but in the touring specifically. Which means that by the time the band rolls into New Haven, Brian's been working through his grief onstage for less than a year. After knowing Freddie for over 23 years and spending 16 of those almost exclusively performing live with Queen.

Saying that Brian was still "not alright" in October 1993 is actually a massive understatement. The worst of his depression, anxiety, and grief is absolutely still there, but Brian keeps working through it - both literally, as he continues with the tour, and figuratively as he uses that tour as his therapy.

But as anyone who’s been in therapy can tell you, it’s not always linear. So when your therapy is performing with your band and you have a momentary backslide…

Well, you pretty much get this exact concert.

I’ve talked about some of this before, most recently in this post where I talk about Brian’s visible reaction to the audience participation in Love of My Life, but honestly I did that moment a disservice by stripping it out of the context of the rest of the show. Because yes, he’s reacting to the audience there (and I'll talk more about the audience later) but critically Brian has been off his game since the start of the show.

(Brian already looking Over It™ after only a few songs)

If you haven't watched (m)any of the BttL concerts, it can be hard to pick up on a lot of this without the additional context of Brian's behavior during other gigs. Brian has always been the most confident while performing and he's comfortable with this band now, so on first watch it’s easy to see him enjoying himself and think that the few moments of overt discomfort are outliers born out of Brian’s unfamiliarity with being a frontman.

But once you start watching more of his concerts, you realize that Brian only seems so comfortable because he’s avoiding going “off script” in his interactions with the audience whenever possible.

The first time this is really apparent comes at the start of Love Token. The introduction to the song is pretty standard across the tour, but what's missing is Brian talking to the audience before launching into things. He tells them, "You guys are great." but the rest of the typical chatter and comments about not having been to New Haven in a while are turned into part of the Love Token opening monologue.

(New Haven, before Love Token)

In contrast, a week later in Milwaukee, Brian does the happy-to-be-back bits entirely separate from Love Token and he explicitly mentions when he was there before with Queen. He's having a genuine moment with the audience outside of the music, and you can tell from his tone of voice and how he’s talking that he’s not doing this on autopilot.

(Milwaukee, before Love Token)

That's something that seems simple, but it still requires talking off-the-cuff to a theater full of people. And if you're already having a rough night, why put yourself through that if you can simply roll it into part of the song and make it a bit more routine for yourself instead?

Then we get into Love of My Life, and I know I already talked about some of this before but amazingly that moment where Brian physically curls in on himself during the song is not the only tell that this isn’t a good night for him.

Again, we have to take a look at Brian’s interactions with the audience because LoML is one of the parts of the show where he can’t avoid talking to them even if he wanted to. What he specifically says can vary wildly from one night to the next, but there are three main beats he usually tries to hit:

Asking the audience to sing along

Telling them that this song is for Freddie

Acknowledging that he wasn’t the one who originally wrote the song

I say “usually” because Brian doesn’t always mention that 3rd point. Often he just says that this is for Freddie and launches into LoML, without any commentary on the song not being “his”.

Sometimes he does mention it but leaves it a little vague, like in March 1993 in New York when he said, “This is something that I don't usually sing and to be honest I get doubts as to whether I should or not.” And sometimes he laughs it off a bit, like he did in Milwaukee in October 1993 when he said, “And it isn't because I was thinking that I have the right, it's just because I really wanna do it."

Regardless of how it’s said, Brian’s emphasis is still on the song being for Freddie. Any comments he makes about his “right” to perform it are almost always secondary to his assertion that he’s doing this in memory of his friend - but not when he gets to New Haven:

(New Haven, before Love of My Life)

In New Haven, Brian (accidentally) puts the focus on the song’s ownership. His slight hesitance and fumbling over his sentence inadvertently puts the emphasis on his own anxieties and mental state, so when he does mention Freddie his grief seems to come through stronger than it may otherwise have done.

Then Brian starts playing and although we have to acknowledge again that he’s having technical issues here, you can still tell the difference between his background emotional state on this night and his frustrations with his guitar. Because when Brian’s problems are external, he reacts and emotes to them externally - but when his problems are internal, he reacts by turning inwards on himself.

(New Haven, during Love of My Life)

Both of those gifs are from LoML. On the left he’s clearly frustrated by the guitar and/or his playing. He’s making a face, shaking his head, trying to adjust to fix it… He’s not exactly going out of his way to hide that there’s an issue there.

But on the right, when the audience sounds a bit too much like they would have with Freddie and their singing is starting to get to him, Brian’s reaction is to close off. He goes still, his face becomes blank, he turns the mic away from him so it can’t pick up any noises if he starts crying again…

(Yes, again, because I’m not going to swear on my life that that’s what’s happening earlier in the song…. but Brian does wipe something away from his face and sometimes that’s enough to make you wonder…)

(New Haven, Brian wiping his face during Love of My Life)

A few songs later and we arrive at Too Much Love Will Kill You. It’s another moment for Brian to talk to the audience, although he usually doesn’t say anything. At both Milwaukee and Brixton, Spike starts playing and Brian just comes in singing. But in New Haven, Brian feels the need to give the audience a little “warning” before they start…

(New Haven, before Too Much Love Will Kill You)

This is Brian’s anxieties coming through again, plain and simple. There’s no need to tell the audience that this part of the show “terrifies” him. If anything there’s a stronger argument to be made that the better, safer option would have been for Brian to say nothing rather than priming the audience to expect this to be imperfect.

Except the audience has already seen the imperfections. Even if they aren’t picking up on every little tell that Brian is having an off night, at this point they’ve already gotten through LoML. Everyone in that theater has already beared witness to his small come-apart during that song, and you know that Brian is absolutely still thinking about that moment as Spike starts the opening notes of TMLWKY.

Here he is, about to sing another slower and more emotional song, only this time he doesn’t have the familiarity of his guitar to fall back on or to hide behind if something goes wrong again. If he’s remembering LoML then surely the audience must be thinking of it too - and surely they must be waiting for him to fuck up again, so clearly the best thing for Brian to do is to preempt this song so the audience knows that this is difficult even on the best of nights.

That’s obviously all speculation but, as someone with an anxiety disorder myself, sometimes it just makes you want to apologize for everything. Whether you’ve actually done something wrong is irrelevant, because the anxiety will always find ways to make it feel like you’re “failing” in some way.

Brian can’t outright apologize to his audience. He’s stuck in his frontman role with a certain script to follow and he can’t break kayfabe to say “Sorry” without ruining the entire atmosphere of the show. What he can do is to admit to the things they should already know - in this case, that being onstage without his guitar is unusual and uncomfortable for him - and let them infer the rest.

He does nearly the same thing again when he talks to the audience at the start of the encore. He always thanks them for coming out to the show, but it feels a little more heartfelt at New Haven.

This part is impossible to gif but the first thing Brian says is, “Let me tell you, this is no bullshit, you guys are amazing. Because there's not that many of us here tonight and I appreciate you guys turning out and making that kind of noise.”

And I promise I’ll get more into the audience in a bit, but the fact that this wasn’t a well-attended show is SO important here as is Brian’s acknowledgment of that. This is really his last chance to say anything to the audience and he decides to specifically thank them for being loud enough to make up for the lack of attendance.

If that doesn’t say something about where his anxieties may have been focused - and what moments from the show struck a genuine chord with him - then I don’t know what does.

After that, Brian only has one more thing to say before he starts introducing “Dream Is Over”...

(New Haven, before the encore)

This is as close as Brian can get to saying, “I’m sorry but I’m doing my best.” He’s saying that he’s giving the audience everything he can and it sounds like an apology anyway. And then he has to steal himself to start the intro to the song, which he always has to do, but it hits a little harder when it’s preceded by that and not by something more like this:

(Milwaukee, before the encore)

And if you’ve made it through this nightmarishly long dissertation about every reason this show is heartbreaking and all the ways you can tell that Brian is having a rough go of it, you’re probably wondering “Rushing what the fuck is wrong with you that THIS is your favorite???”

Which, valid. But it’s my favorite because I think it’s both incredibly important and, honestly, very humbling to see Brian like this.

This isn’t the Tribute Concert, where everything is still so raw and performing hurts as much as doing nothing at all. This isn’t 1992 in South America where Brian can channel his grief into his frustration and push it out on the techs every time something goes wrong. This isn’t an opening show for GNR, where Brian’s time is more limited and even if he gets emotional he’s (probably) not the reason everyone in the theater is there.

This is Brian, not quite two years on from Freddie’s death, still mourning and still extremely depressed and anxious. And this is what it looks like when Brian has to push through that and put on a show anyway. The ways in which he both pulls away from the audience and tries to open up to them give insights not just into the state of Brian’s mental health at the time, but how that affected everything else about him from the way he carried himself to his mannerisms to how he followed the script of his own concert.

The October New Haven concert is a stark reminder of the depths of Brian’s depression and just how much time it takes a person to claw their way out of that.

And the other reason I love this concert is that you absolutely can also see the progress that Brian has already made.

Because despite the 2,500 words dissecting all the ways in which Brian was not fine during this show, there are still plenty of moments where it’s abundantly clear that he was enjoying being able to perform his music with this band.

(New Haven, Brian looking happy)

He’s visibly delighted every time he realizes that Jamie has shimmied over to join him without him realizing. He keeps looking over to everyone on his right and grinning. Whenever he really nails a difficult guitar line you can almost see the confidence boost that it gives him.

Yes, Brian is depressed and struggling but when he’s onstage he’s still Brian fucking May. He’s in his element and he is nailing it, despite the technical hiccups and emotional moments and everything in-between.

I love this concert because you see the depths of who Brian is as a person: his musicianship and how he uses that as a crutch to keep himself moving forward, the love he has for both the friends he’s performing with and those who are gone, his fears and anxieties and moments of deep self-doubt, the guitar legend he grew up to be and the incredible frontman he didn’t realize he could be, and the tired person simply trying to find himself anew after 20 years spent as someone he can’t return to anymore.

And there’s one final, very important reason that I love this show so much: the audience. (I promised we’d talk about them eventually, didn’t I?)

Brian has always been someone who thrives on the atmosphere of a live show and by god was New Haven determined to give him everything they could. They were loud, they were enthusiastic, and you can see Brian responding to that.

(New Haven, Brian looking happy because of the audience)

Brian pulls himself back together after the audience starts cheering for him during LoML. During band introductions they applaud for him long enough that it bleeds into the next song, and despite himself Brian smiles at it. And every time they recognize a Queen song you can see Brian responding to something familiar to him again.

Do you know how hard it was to get even these three gifs? Not because finding the moments was difficult, but because this audience is enjoying themselves so much that their arms are blocking the view more often than not.

Look, I am stupidly biased about this show because I’m a CT native - not from New Haven, but this is still a “home” show for me. Brian walks out wearing that tank top and I get why he wore hometown shirts for the encores even though I fucking hate Yale. This show could have been the most run-of-the-mill, routine concert imaginable and I would still find some way to write 3,000 words waxing poetic about it.

But this wasn’t a routine concert - or maybe a better way to put it would be, this was an incredibly routine concert made remarkable because of far Brian’s mask has slipped and what that inadvertently reveals to us. It’s incredible because the quality of the bootleg means we can actually see the little details of expression that otherwise are often lost.

The October New Haven concert is my favorite from Brian’s first solo tour because it proves the entire point he was making with the album. It’s a performance that shows us that Brian was finding his way Back to the Light - and that even when he was still in the dark, he was “still the same old [him] inside” despite everything that changed.

#brian may #brian harold may #brian may solo #queen #queen band #text #long post //#ramblings #brian #HEY WARNING THIS IS 3200 WORDS SO CLICK THROUGH AT YOUR OWN RISK

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housewife-noire · 5 months

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Depression Master Post

I AM NOT A DOCTOR OR THERAPIST, JUST SAYING WHAT WORKS FOR ME

Tips that work for me:

♡Utilize your audio notes apps on your phone as an 'audio diary', talk to yourself like it's a podcast, interview, imaginary bestie etc

♡warm wet rag, toner (I use a bottle type and a spray type), moisturizer, Vaseline for a 'lazy' skincare routine. You can also use rose water to cleanse your face. This takes literally five minutes

♡modified stretches/workouts are your best friend, it's actually very easy to do stretches without getting outta bed or even moving your blanket!!

♡open up your blinds!!!!!

♡ensures and similar brands w/ extra protein for days you absolutely can't get out of bed

♡can't shower? No problem. You can get bathing cloths at any pharmacy otc (you can purchase with an HSA card as well!) Just add water to the pack no soap or rinsing needed

♡any food is better than no food!!!

♡90 minute rice + tuna packs are good 5 minute meals w/ some substance. You can add any add ins you want(I add fried egg and avocado)

♡download the finch app!! It's super cute and like a self care tamagotchi

♡allow yourself the time to rest

♡have a self love/feel good Playlist ready

♡rewatch your fave childhood show/movie. Anything that's been longer than 5 years since you've seen it works best imo

♡pedialyte AND water to keep hydrated, add a pinch of pink salt to the water

♡mix water, rubbing alcohol and essential oils to make an air freshner spray for bedding and clothing

♡if you're not on any medications, combine l-theanine and st John's wort supplements for mood health (can also add St John's wort, damiana, lavender and mint/catnip to a tea or smoke blend)

♡pure tart cherry juice before bed to help you sleep

♡download the I Am app and repeat the affirmations you see out loud thrice

♡can't brush your teeth? Get a water flosser and add a bit of mouthwash & peroxide to the reservoir to kill bacteria and remove stuck food

♡use pink or brown noise as your background for sleeping, you can find these on youtube

♡download MindDoc & Gratitude if you have the spoons to have prompts and questions to answer about your mood

♡digital coloring books!!! I use infinite painer and sketchbook on my Samsung tablet

♡if you scroll any app, pick the one you see the most positive or nontoxic feed (lemon8 and tumblr for me), this way your consumption is potentially bettering your life

♡charge your phone and other devices in a separate room/a few feet away from your bed to reduce scrolling and help promote getting out of bed to turn off alarms etc

♡daily shower spray cleaner, helps keep your tub clean. I spray after I get out

♡use Groupon to schedule yourself a moodboosting self care activity for the month (massage, tanning, filler, facial)

♡eat with a tray in bed

♡spray your fave body spray before bed

Hope these tips help someone!!! Add your own in the tags or reblog ♡

Happy House Spousing ♡♡♡♡

#black housewife #black women in femininity #homemaker #bunni boo babblz #cooking #high maintenance #skincare #mental health #good advice #self isolation #keyewed

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astrxealis · 1 year

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comin in ere just rq to say tldr (final. real.) fuuta !! i want him to be voted innocent/forgiven bcs i hope he can. make peace with himself. i think he's truly a good guy at heart even if that doesn't excuse all that he did (i think he's. some sort of victim too and he deserved better. by this i mean like w his friends?? some sort of pressure and all. also the fact all the blame got put onto him which sucks but also with context, if that context is right, is rather deserved ngl. also i'm worried if he gets voted guilty bcs something bad will def happen)

#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#⋯ ꒰ა milgram ໒꒱ *·˚#being a twitter user and chronically online did this to him /j #joking bcs yeah a bit of that maybe but i think the guy is kinda lonely. like. friends but there's the pressure from them too and all #yeah my thoughts are clearer now (phew!) i think i think too hard and too much but thinking so much was fun tbh #now i'm chill (listening to haruka's song on repeat as i try to do homework. keyword try)#he/milgram/viewers/es. the 'same'. and. agh. it is just so interesting and so so amazing to me (wow!)#but now i will try to chill (keyword try. it is 1 am i really should do my homework i hate chem)#i have more hw for the week still and then next week... i'll try to do my best and hopefully not get distracted #it's still kinda complicated bcs i want to vote 'what would be best overall' but yeah forgiving him aligns with that i think #as well as my own personal beliefs. so yeah #huh. i think i just thought way too much and confused myself (happens often bcs i try to understand all sides. oops!)#i like fuuta a lot. he reminds me of himself and that's another reason why i think forgiving him this time is for the best #and then ultimately forgiving him as well. but imo guilty first trial actually makes sense even if... at the same time idk #it kinda broke him uhh. made him unstable and all. yk the drama audio yeah. but it helped in making his beliefs better and all #i think milgram makes my brain go into overdrive. maybe even a bit too much #didn't realize how much time passed and i was just thinking and talking about milgram goddamn #hi more thoughts but yeah... he feels regret and i think hes starting to feel guilty. maybe? im not sure my head is sort of a mess again #maybe i just need to sleep. it is 5 am now. hmmm. but yeah hes definitely changed #he's heading towards improvment <3 !! fuuta innocent so true please #im still confused about whether the whole. Guilt thing #sometimes i forget what some words mean or use them as synonyms oops (metavoting and guilt oops!)

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badass-queer-couples-battle · 7 months

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Propaganda:

For Shadowpeach: "ok so, we all know from that one tumblr post that yaoi is two blokes doing fuckall and yuri is when there’s themes and shit? well these two (shadowpeach) have So Much Themes. they were super close friends for years and years (both immortal) before their epic breakup scene (wukong was trapped under a mountain and macaque refused to free him) (he wasn’t entirely in the wrong but that’s another story) (also wukong killed macaque there was that, that did happen) (its complicated)

from the Moment we see these two, all we know about them is that they’re the most divorced ever. as time goes on, we see the complexities in their relationship, and they introduce a lot of the overarching themes and motifs of the show (hero and warrior pairs, peaches being a symbol of their relationship, etc). also they’re both girls to me

tmnt theme song voice toxic codependent yuri!"

"theyre So So gay divorced and have an incredibly complicated and toxic relationship. also according to that one tumblr post yaoi is when theres two blokes doing fuckall and yuri is when theres themes and shit, and these two have So So So many themes and shit. theyve got motifs out the wazoo. peaches are a motif of their relationship and in the very end of the s4 finale wukong hands macaque a half-melted peach flavored (and shaped) popsicle. this is yuri to me"

"They used to be semi-immortal bff's, but then they fell apart and literally one of them died(bc of the other), then he revived, then got semi-consumed by revenge™ and tried to kill each other for a while, but they are cool now and they gave the sweetest little smiles when they finally talked- *fangirls* ok ok, look at it this way: it's a royalty au but it's canon."

"Well, they are toxic doomed yuri vibes, in my.most opinion. But also their designs are pretty gender I think.. mostly wukongs imo. And ik eyelashes aren't inherently feminine but theyre both some of the few(if not only) male characters in the show with visible eyelashes. Also if it counts, out of the relationships that I've seen compared to theirs, most are canonical sapphic relationships from other cartoons (catradora and bubbline notably)"

For Arthur and Linus: "THEY ARE SOO YURI!! OLD MAN YURI!!! LIKE!!! JUST LOOK AT THEM!!! THEYRE SO ADORABLE"

"A warm, loving caretaker of magical children who are orphans falls in love with the fat neurotic caseworker and changes his life for the better."

For Thoschei: "i. why great

They are each other's narrative foils. They are archenemies. They were childhood friends. They might not have been married, but they are divorced. They call themselves best enemies. They are the "i can fix them"/"i can make them worse" duo. They've proposed to each other (to rule/travel across the universe together), but each declined the offer from the other. They've kissed. They've killed each other. They've killed for each other (the first to do so was the Doctor who is the protagonist and the hero, but this fact was revealed in an audio drama, not in the TV show). The universe's too small for both of them. "The cosmos without the Doctor scarcely bears thinking about" is a real quote from one of the episodes from the 1980s. They are war criminals. The Master commits atrocities to attract the Doctor's attention and admits it. They are not able to get rid of each other for good, nor they really want to. One of the showrunners literally spent the BBC's money to make his E2L I Can't Decide fanvid for them and make it a part of an episode.

ii. why guy:

They'd been in male bodies for more than 40 years…

iii. why yuri

…until one of them regenerated into a woman. After some time, the other did so too. Sadly, they haven't interacted in their female bodies on screen, but the fandom makes do with fan content.

in conclusion: this is The guy yuri if i've ever seen one"

#guy yuri round 1 #doctor who #lego monkie kid #the house in the cerulean sea #shadowpeach #thoschei #the doctor #the master #sun wukong #lmk macaque #linus baker #arthur parnassus #thitcs #tj klune #lmk #guy yuri poll #(this poll reminded me I've had THITCS on my to read list for months)#(need to get into it found family is my jam(

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dumplingsfordays · 5 months

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i'm your best friend, no?

pairing - best friend!roommate!thoma x reader

genre - fluff (comfort)

summary - after your (now ex) bf sends you some very... questionable texts, thoma, like the sweetheart that he is, lends a helping hand.

cw!: cheating, implied sex (between reader's bf and someone else), thoma being super duper sweet <3

note - couldn't pick a character bc I live for comfort fics so decided to do an (imo) underrated one 😭😭 haven't written for genshin in a bit so likeee might write some for it later

...

˗ˏˋ ★ ˎˊ˗

ping!

You opened your eyes lazily, with a sigh escaping your slightly chapped lips. Your phone on your bedside table was making noise. What time was it, even?

Reaching over to grab it, you felt your head spin a little and feeling the chap-ness of your lips, you gave them a quick lick before turning on your phone.

Who sends this many notifications at 2 in the morning?

You glanced at the sender. Oh. That makes much more sense.

39 messages from babe

"Ughhhh... it's way too early for this."

ping!

"Oh, fine!" you whispered angrily to yourself, opening the messages. "It'll be fine, y/n, he probably just wants to apologize for yesterday. Always does."

To your shock and disappointment, the messages weren't an apology. They were photographic (and even audio, which disgusted you infinitely more) evidence of him cheating on you with some brunette girl. The first thing you noticed was how pretty she looked - wide doe eyes, reddened lips... and then you saw the background and other details of the photos and almost vomited.

Almost immediately your eyes shot to the texts, praying that you would find an apology or at least an excuse.

were having sm fun baby, come join us ;)

What. The. Fuck.

All the other texts were written in the same fashion. There were no apologies or excuses - only sleazy, vile invitations and comments on how the brunette did everything so much better than you did. Was he trying to make you jealous by cheating on you? If so, it didn't work at all. You were positively horrified.

Diving under your blanket with record speed, you started to quietly sob. Fat tears formed at the corners of your eyes, threatening to roll down your cheeks, and your bottom lip trembled violently as you shuddered. How could he? Why? Were you not good enough for him? Were your eyes too big or too small? Were your lips too pale or too red? Was your personality annoying?

You knew what to do, but you didn't have the strength to do it.

And then, interrupting your thoughts, came a voice. Your roommate's voice, specifically.

"Hey, you alright in there?"

You didn't want to call out and pretend that you were sleeping, but alas, your brain chose otherwise before you could even decide.

"Y-yeah," you sniffled, "I'm good."

"No you're not, you're crying. I can hear it in your voice."

God, why did he have to be so insistent?

"y/n," he continued. "If something's happened you can always tell me. I'm your best friend, no?"

After a pause you reluctantly accepted. "Oh, fine."

You shifted, lifting the blanket and sliding your feet into the slippers beside your bed. They were unpleasantly cold, but you didn't really care - the floor was probably colder, and this was better than nothing. Slippers squeaking slightly on the floor, you made your way to the door and opened it to a very messy-looking, and very worried, Thoma.

"Hey, sweetie," he muttered as he furrowed his eyebrows, using that oh-so-familiar nickname. You smiled sadly in return. The blond reached out to you and pulled you in for a hug, and as you felt his arms loop around you, he sighed into your shoulder.

"C'mon, tell me what happened."

At this you couldn't hold in your tears any longer. They poured out of your eyes like a river, probably staining the white shirt that he had on, but he didn't seem to mind - in fact, he leaned in and let you hold on to him.

Deciding that it was best to let you lay down, Thoma scooped you up into his arms and carried you to your bed, where he placed you on the sheets, covering you with the blanket as you sniffled.

"My boyfriend," you started, grasping Thoma's hands in yours, "he- he sent me some texts just now and-"

You burst into tears all over again. Just say it, you thought to yourself, just do it! Why is this so hard for you, y/n?

"Oh, sweetie," Thoma cooed in return, leaning over to hug you warmly. "Do you wanna show me the texts or do you want me to wait a sec?"

You nodded weakly, plucking your phone from where you left it on the nightstand and unlocking it. You handed it to Thoma, whose eyes widened upon glancing at the messages. His brows furrowed as he scrolled further down, only raising in disgusted shock as he reached the bubble that finally made you break.

were having sm fun baby, come join us ;)

"What the fuck is your boyfriend thinking?" he whispered, looking back at your reddened cheeks and trembling lip as he finally laid down beside you.

"I don't know," you replied, sliding farther under the covers. "I mean, he did this before, but he apologized-"

"y/n, he did this before? And you didn't dump him?"

"N-no, but-"

"Sweetie," he sighed as he put the phone back and hugged you again. "When your partner cheats on you, never stick around. Doesn't matter how much they shower you in praise or how many dates they take you on, 90% of the time they will do it again. You put your trust in him and he broke it twice. I'd say that's more than enough cause to leave him."

"But why did he do it? Are my eyes too small or big compared to that girl in the picture? Am I uglier than her? Is my personality worse? Am I a bad person, Thoma?"

His expression turned from one of perplexed anger to one of consolation as he spoke.

"No, no, you're a wonderful person," he said gently, "I honestly don't know either. You're gorgeous and stunning and every time I see you, you bring a smile to my face regardless of how bad of a day it's been. You're not a bad person and I hate to see you think of yourself that way."

His hands gave yours a small, comforting squeeze as you sniffled.

"Thanks, Thoma. I think you're a wonderful person too," you smiled softly, tears still running down your cheeks.

He chuckled quietly in return. "Of course. Now, are you gonna go to bed, or do you wanna stay up for a little bit and watch a movie or something?"

"A movie sounds nice. But we're watching it together, right?"

"Only if you want to."

"Yeah, I do."

Returning your smile, he sat up, still holding your hand, and as you grabbed a large blanket from your closet, you realized that you couldn't have wished for a better roommate.

#thoma #genshin x reader #thoma x reader #thoma x you #thoma x y/n #tohma x reader #tohma genshin #thoma genshin #genshin impact #genshin #fluff #thoma fluff #thoma comfort #the housewifeiest housewife of them all

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ebiemoon · 3 months

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finished the untamed and yeah... i loved that oh my god. though its unfortunate that some of my favorite novel scenes and much of the romance aspect had to be removed, i think even without it, the care/bond wangxian have was well portrayed and the story was followed pretty nicely? i highly recommend reading the novel first though- or else you'll be a little confused

xiao zhan and wang yibo make an excellent wei wuxian and lan wangji... their personalities really came through. im so enamored with xz's performance as wei ying- his cutesy mannerisms, his tears, his anger, and his pain were all so well expressed

the ending... i heard the special edition ending is better so im excited for that (at least my heart rests easy knowing the true canon novel ending exists hah)

but i will say the live action a-yuan "reveal" is the best of all the adaptations imo! i found myself tearing up- such a soft "father-son" moment

eventually i will listen to the audio drama which i am SO excited for!

#mdzs #the untamed #cql #nico stuff #trying to ignore my tiny crush on xz

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jadejedi · 7 months

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Fantasy Book Review: A Taste of Gold and Iron by Alexandra Rowland

JJ's rating: 5/5

How feral did it make me: 5/5

My book reviews

I’ve been reading (or listening) to a lot more books this year than normal, and I have realized that I need an outlet to talk about them. I considered making a goodreads account, but hey I already have this! So I will be reviewing the books I’ve read this year, and depending on how long it takes me, I might just start reviewing all my favorite reads. I'm probably going to add links to my blog to make them easier to find.

Let’s get into it. This book is so good. SO GOOD. I listened to it on audiobook, which normally means while I’m at work, driving, or at home doing chores, but I literally listened to the last 2 hours of this book at home doing absolutely nothing, just on the edge of my damn seat!

Here’s a quick summary: the very anxious Prince Kadou accidentally causes a serious incident that leaves multiple of his personal guards dead or injured. In the aftermath, he is assigned a new guard by the sultan who is known for being an uptight rule follower. As their personalities clash, they have to solve a mystery and learn to work together…

I want to preface this review by saying that this is definitely a romance novel with a fantasy setting. The world building, especially for the main country this novel takes place in, is great and extremely vivid without unnecessary info dumps. The main plot of the story is perfectly serviceable, if a tad predictable, but it 1000% does what it needs to do for the romance.

But, the romance. THE ROMANCE. This book was advertised as an “enemies to lovers slow burn romance” and it 100% delivers on both. Now, when some people think “enemies to lovers” or (even better imo) “enemies to friends to lovers”, they imagine that at least one of the parties involved is a horrible villain and the relationship is probably abusive in some way. I’m sure there are plenty of books out there where that is absolutely the case, but Rowland gets what makes that trope so good. It’s about two characters who are both good people, but initially clash. It’s the mutual hatred born out of a fundamental misunderstanding of the other’s character, it’s the eventual begrudging respect, it’s THE YEARNING. THE PINING.

Both of these characters are so wonderful. We get both POV’s throughout: Kadou’s anxious desire to do what’s best for his country and not fuck anything up, and Evemere’s steadfast, noble determination to understand what makes the prince the way he is.

I don’t want to give too much more away, but this book is filled with ALL the delightful romance tropes you could ever desire.

Can we talk about pacing?? Pacing is so, so important, especially when writing a slow burn romance, and this author GETS. IT. Sometimes if the romance is resolved too early, all the tension goes out of the story, because if it’s a romance novel, we’re here for the romance, not the plot. But in this story the whole novel is centered around the romance, and the pacing just works so, so well.

Also, the way that queerness is written into this story is wonderful. Third gender pronouns abound and same sex attraction is fully accepted, and it’s really refreshing. Also, there are multiple female characters who play significant roles in the story who are fleshed out characters, which I feel is sometimes lacking in M/M romances.

I have not been able to stop thinking about this book since I finished it like four days ago. I listened to the audio book, which had an excellent narrator, but have also ordered the paperback with my favorite version of the cover. Please, do yourself the favor and read this one. Also, if you do read it, the author published a 10,000 word fanfic epilogue on AO3. It’s called What spring does with the cherry trees, and it’s a goddamn delight.

#a taste of gold and iron #book review #fantasy book review #mlm #slowww burn #meet ugly #romantasy

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