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accio-spaceman · 5 years

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VORTEX Magazine - Issue 122

(April 2019)

Download PDF version for FREE on the Big Finish website

Partners In Time

At last! The Doctor and Donna are back!

[Above Cover for “The Tenth Doctor Adventures Volume Three”, featuring (l-r, top-bottom) Catherine Tate, David Tennant, Jacqueline King, Bernard Cribbins, and two Judoon.]

The Doctor and Donna Noble are arguably one of the most popular Doctor and companion pairings ever, and their adventures in space and time continue in The Tenth Doctor Adventures Volume Three. David Tennant and Catherine Tate reprise their TV roles for a second run of audio adventures from Big Finish.

(Full Article Under Cut)

Producer David Richardson says: “I actually got very nervous in the weeks before recording, as I did on their previous box set. You are just so aware that you are going to be working with two of the biggest stars in this country, and you want them to have a brilliant time and for the whole thing to run smoothly.

“The night before recording I just told myself, forget the nerves, treat it like any other production and it will be great. And actually by the time David and Catherine arrived at Moat Studios, the nerves had totally evaporated.

“David and Catherine don’t behave like stars – they walked in as two normal people who get on with everyone. When you’re sitting having a cup of tea with David Tennant talking about The Avengers or whatever, you’re really just chatting to a lovely human being.”

It was director Ken Bentley’s first time directing David and Catherine, and before recording began he admitted to Vortex: “I’ve not had much time to think about it as we’ve been extremely busy through August and September. I only just managed to squeeze in the time to schedule it!

[Above (l-r) David Tennant and Catherine Tate]

“I’m like any fan, dying to hear what the Nobles, Wilf and The Doctor get up to. What a dream cast!”

– Russell T Davies

“I always get excited about working on a new range. The bit I love the most about directing is working with actors, and to work with actors new to me is always something I look forward to.

“In my line of work it’s the rehearsal room and the recording studio where the magic happens, and it’s always a treat to watch professionals bringing roles to life.

“All actors work and respond differently. Part of my job is to quickly figure out how an actor likes to work so I can help make the recording go as smoothly as possible for them – and for everybody else. It’s a challenge I enjoy and I like to get it right. So it’s exciting for me to work with an entirely new team and to figure out what makes them tick.”

[Above Cover for “No Place” by James Goss, featuring (l-r) Bernard Cribbins, Catherine Tate, David Tennant, and Jacqueline King.]

The first story in the set is No Place by James Goss. Script editor Matt Fitton says: “We knew straightaway we could bring the wider Noble family into it by having Donna and Sylvia together, so we gave James that brief. It meant it had to be set on Donna’s contemporary Earth, since her mum isn’t aware of her space and time travel yet.”

Former Doctor Who showrunner Russell T Davies, creator of Donna, Sylvia and Wilf, tells Vortex: “I’m so excited about the return of the Noble family. I put in a request to Big Finish never thinking they’d actually pull it off. But, I might have known, they’re unstoppable! Marvellously, I haven’t heard the adventure myself yet, so I’m like any fan, dying to hear what the Nobles, Wilf and the Doctor get up to. What a dream cast!”

Jacqueline King was delighted to be back as Sylvia.

She says: “Since we finished on TV I’ve seen David a couple of times, and I keep in touch with Bernard because he’s so gorgeous! He and I did the quiz show Pointless. And Catherine was in a play which Bernard and I went to see together, so that was lovely. We’ve just not been all together so there was so much to catch up on. I felt desperately maternal towards Catherine, wanting to know how she was!

“I was very jealous that David and Catherine were going on to do more stories over the next couple of days without Bernard and myself. Bernard and I were joking, asking, How can you do that? That’s just disloyal!

“It was lovely, and if we could have carried on I would have but it was just one day. It would be heaven if we could do more!”

Matt continues: “James came back with this ‘haunted makeovers’ idea which was great, and as it was being developed we asked James to keep in mind a role for Wilf in case we were able to get Bernard Cribbins – perhaps just a cameo role. As it turned out we learned fairly early on that we could have Bernard for the whole day, so it all worked out perfectly and Wilf was fully included in the episode at the storyline stage.”

In a similar vein to what the TV show did at the time, No Place taps into the zeitgeist of what is currently popular on TV, which in this case brings in the feed of ghost and home makeover reality TV shows.

“If you’re a fan of either Buzzfeed Unsolved or Homes Under The Hammer you’ll find lots to love in this.”

– James Goss

James explains: “Honestly, when you think about it most horror films are home makeover shows! Family moves into house on haunted graveyard. Tries to do it up. Ends up running away screaming/being dead/finds out they were always dead so probably shouldn’t have bothered wallpapering the downstairs bathroom. This was inspired by that. Imagining a horror film but with Kirsty Allsop following our screaming family about. And making the screaming family the Doctor, Donna, Sylvia and Wilf.

“If you’re a fan of either Buzzfeed Unsolved or Homes Under the Hammer you’ll find lots to love in this. We’ve got a ghostbox, we’ve got replacement light fittings, we’ve mysterious voices, we’ve endless discussions about plumbing. The one thing we couldn’t do was Hammer’s endless, appalling punning music track. (Presenter: ‘They really do love this hopeless place.’ Music: ‘We Found Love in a Hopeless Place’)!”

Producer David Richardson adds: “I’m struck by how creepy it all sounds. Some of the sequences in the old house are really unsettling even without any effects or music, which is a sure sign of how great the writing, performances and direction are.”

[Above Cover for “One Mile Down” by Jenny T Colgan, featuring (l-r) David Tennant, a Judoon, and Catherine Tate.]

One Mile Down by Jenny T Colgan continues the Doctor and Donna’s adventures when they find themselves in an underwater city and encounter the Judoon.

Matt continues: “In terms of using new series monsters, the Judoon are one of the most recognisable and the Tenth Doctor has some history with them, meeting them several times during his era.

“Because of what’s been established on screen there are certain monsters he’s meeting for the first time, but with the Judoon he knows what they’re about and how they work. They are not power-crazed evil monsters, they are mercenaries working for other people, and their agenda isn’t always immediately clear. It’s nice to have that bit of potential uncertainty – are they an ally? Are they a threat? We get to play with that in this story.”

“We have individuals in the Judoon ranks which we’ve touched on before. There’s the trainee, Klo, who starts to side with the Doctor and Donna, realising they can do some good during the story, which is a fun thing to play with.” The story’s setting lends itself to a good soundscape, with a city beneath the waves.

Matt explains: “In the TV episode Smith and Jones, the first thing we see the Judoon do is control the rain and send it upwards with their H2O scoop.

“That means we can make use of their technology which lends itself perfectly to an audio story.”

Of course, Donna has also encountered the Judoon on TV, and Matt adds: “Watching Donna in The Stolen Earth, we get a reaction from her to the Judoon, but when we checked with Russell he watched it back and felt there was no reason why Donna couldn’t have met them before.

“What’s clearly a surprise to her is the Doctor speaking Judoon, so we were very careful not to have him doing that in front of her.”

[Above Cover for “The Creeping Death” by Roy Gill, featuring (l-r) David Tennant, Catherine Tate, and Lauren Cornelius dressed in 1952 London period-costume, holding a torch.]

Concluding this series is The Creeping Death by Roy Gill.

David explains: “We asked the writers for short pitches – I think they might have sent in three ideas each. I’ve actually been keeping a list of things I want to see in a Doctor Who story, one of which was ‘The London Fog of 1952’, so it was a no-brainer when Roy pitched that one!”

Roy was delighted to be able to write for David Tennant, a fellow Scotsman, as well as Donna.

He admits it was: “Hugely exciting. They’re one of my Doctor Who dream teams, really. The Doctor and Donna are best friends, they’re fast and funny, they wind each other up but most importantly they make each other stronger and better. Their dialogue was a joy to write – and yes please, if the opportunity ever comes up, I absolutely want to do more!”

Roy travelled from his Edinburgh home to attend the recording at Moat Studios in London, and has plenty of happy memories from the sessions.

Roy adds: “Oh, loads! David asking, ‘Is that a Scottish accent?’ as soon as he met me – and then me kind of over-explaining where I’m from (sorry, David...). Catherine cracking up over her lines about ‘bad air’ and cheese and onion crisps… How quickly all the big, exciting scenes flew by in the recording booths.

“Stephen Critchlow talking over lunch about the classic Who he’d been watching with his daughter. Lauren Cornelius telling me she’d loved her character and the story so much that when she got the script she read it from cover to cover then immediately turned it over and read it again! Theo Stevenson saying he’d watched David Tennant’s Doctor when he was about 10 or 12. He was thrilled to be in a Doctor Who – making us all feel ancient!”

Producer David adds: “This story is brilliant! Just a character piece about a group of people lost in the fog and there’s something really nasty out there… David has some terrific speeches, Catherine gets to play out some lovely relationships with the guest characters, and the whole thing feels like it was on TV back in 2008.”

Director Ken Bentley was relieved when recording was complete after three successive days in studio – which Big Finish rarely do.

He explains: “It’s great to know we have a complete box set in the bag! These days availabilities are such that we’re squeezing in recordings as and when we can, sometimes over quite long periods of time. It’s rare to record three days straight and know you’ve got it all, but given the schedule we’re all on it’s a huge relief!”

“The whole thing feels like it was on TV back in 2008.”

– David Richardson

Responsible for music and sound design is Howard Carter, who says: “I’ll usually go through and work out if there are any background or atmosphere tracks that reappear throughout the play, or any individual recurring effects (specific vehicles or weapons, for example). If so I will create these in advance and add them to the project library so they are ready to drag and drop in when I’m working. I’ll record the foley sound as I go and layer up all the relevant backgrounds and effects scene by scene. Once the full play is assembled I’ll send a draft off to the director and move on to the score.

“I will usually spend a couple of days scoring a play although if there’s more time I will always spend longer (I’m a composer by trade!). At this point I know the play well so will have a sense of the mood, style and pacing.

“If I’m working on a completely new play I’ll create a template and start adding instruments and sounds as I see fit in order to start with a completely fresh palette. Every play is different so I don’t have one fixed approach. There are scene breaks which usually need a cue, and there are sometimes musical directions in the script, but otherwise a lot of the process is instinctive. A play may need a lot of music to keep energy levels up and maintain a sense of pace, or it may need the music to really take a background role and just glue certain elements together. Each one is unique.”

– VORTEX Magazine, Issue 122, Pages 4-8

THE TENTH DOCTOR ADVENTURES VOLUME THREE IS OUT IN MAY ON CD AND DOWNLOAD.

The Tenth Doctor Adventures Volume Three is out in May on CD and Download.

The special edition release comes complete with exclusive production notes, storyboards from Mike Tucker and costume designs from June Hudson.

For full details visit www.bigfinish.com .

(Edited to include Lauren Cornelius’ name in the image description of “The Creeping Death” cover.)

#vortex magazine #big finish #doctor who #the tenth doctor adventures #david tennant #catherine tate #bernard cribbins #jacqueline king #the tenth doctor adventures: volume iii #no place #james goss #one mile down #jenny t colgan #the creeping death #roy gill #becca posts #article #issue 122

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david-tennant-news · 6 years

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FREE DOWNLOAD: Vortex Magazine from Big Finish Feat. David Tennant & Billie Piper

FREE DOWNLOAD: Vortex Magazine from @bigfinish Feat. #DavidTennant & @billiepiper @BriggsNicholas

Are you ready for the new release of The Tenth Doctor Adventures Volume 2 audio dramas from Big Finish? November is approaching and Vortex has a little sneak peek for you.

The November issue of Vortex from Big Finish is featuring behind the scenes of the Tenth Doctor (David Tennant) and Rose Tyler (Billie Piper)’s latest adventures. It also gives us a sneak peek from executive producer, Nicholas…

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#Big Finish #David Tennant #Doctor Who - The Tenth Doctor Adventures Vol 2 #Vortex Magazine

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markgatissappreciationsociety · 2 years

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Mark Gatiss in Big Finish’s Vortex

Big Finish has put all the issues of their in-house promo magazine Vortex online, so of course I spent an afternoon going through them for Mark Gatiss references. These are the key issues I found:

Issue #86, April 2016 - Mark’s Doctor Who novel Nightshade is adapted. “I think it’s still pretty good. It’s a good idea, I think (they’re rare beasts) and though I think it’s a bit rambling, there’s some good scary stuff in there. I was writing the version of the show I wanted the series to be at the time and I think it holds up okay.”

Issue #87, May 2016 - A feature on voicing Dracula for the adaptation of the same name. (Look at those freckles! Not usually a feature of the character.) “It’s just a wonderful, scary story and, in Dracula, you have one of the great villains. Ancient, infinitely wise, infinitely corrupt – yet finally destroyed by the ingenuity of a few dedicated friends.” “I knew I wanted to give him a Hungarian/Romanian lilt but not do the ‘full Lugosi’ as it were. I was doing a play at the National Theatre at the time of the recording so my voice was very deep and gravelly which worked nicely. I wanted to do the whole thing very close to the microphone.Powerful people don’t have to raise their voice...”

Issue #90, August 2016 - A mention of Mark playing the Master (as Sam Kisgart) for a Bernice Summerfield project. (Where the chair picture comes from!)

Issue #103, September 2017 - Another Bernice Summerfield release, again with quotes from Mark as the Master, against David Warner as the Doctor.

Issue #132, February 2020 - A feature on Dracula’s Guests, starring Mark. “I missed having the whole cast this time as I had to record most of my new bits alone. But it was lovely to be back at Big Finish in its anniversary year – 20 years after first recording The Sirens of Time and Phantasmagoria!” Ian Hallard also has a role in the project.

Issue #138, August 2020 - A feature on Dracula’s War, completing the trilogy. No quotes from Mark, just the picture above, which reminds me of a mug shot.

Issue #145, March 2021 - Mark is part of the Dalek Universe box set. No quotes, just the home recording picture above.

Issue #148, June 2021 - Working on The Box of Delights. The director says, “It was only when I was chatting to Mark Gatiss about something entirely unrelated and discovered he was a monumental The Box of Delights fan that the decision was made: Derek [Jacobi] would play the good wizard and Mark the bad. Their performances are the bedrock of the story and they both excelled themselves.”

From Mark: “There’s something special about The Box of Delights, it is so beautiful it makes your hair stand on end. The whole tale and the ideas in it have such magic to them. And Abner’s a great part. The idea of a corrupt magician posing as a clergyman... it’s weird and mystical and then also villainous. What can I say? It’s why you do it!”

#mark gatiss #big finish #mark gatiss audio work #mark gatiss as dracula

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greendreamer · 2 years

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Context below

Big Finish has barely released any info on the 2022 range of the Torchwood monthly release. What little info we have is contradicting each other. The Vortex Magzine has given us titles for No 58 and 59 (which were quietly added to the website hours after the magazine came out). Plus confirmed releases for March and April. Whereas the website still says that no. 60 will be coming out in April.

It's weird seeing what's coming out this month from Big Finish, and just having this blank Torchwood entry (stock image and all)

#Torchwood #torchwood meme #big finish #big finish audios

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batnbreakfast · 3 years

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For your Zoom, Booze and no Doom, I wonder if any of you have checked out Big Finish's Vortex magazine they released online today?

Hi anon - I have to say that I was thinking more about questions like "Is it okay to join in with my camera off?" or "I've never took part, is it weird to start taking part now?", so your question seemed a bit unusual in regards to the Zoom.

But... anon? Anon?? Thanks for making me look at the magazine. I didn't even knew it existed and now I found this:

And I'm very happy about that.

For everyone wanting to read an article on UNIT and look at a cute Jemma picture? You can find the magazine for free right here.

#zoom booze no doom #kind of #jemma redgrave #thanks for the ask anon! :)

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thenightmaregrrl · 2 years

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Orion's Body- A Transformers Shattered Glass Fanfic- Chapter 9: Killing Bots

The next day, authorities found the body of Swindle. A funeral was held for him in the local cemetery, his roommates, the Combaticons (as they like to call themselves) were sitting, wearing black to show they’re mourning. On the other side of the casket were Swindle’s econ class buddies, all wearing sharp dressed suits fit for a business meeting.

“We gather here to celebrate the life of Swindle. Who was plucked from the prime of his youth.” A priest was speaking.

Soon a Combaticon, Vortex got up from his seat, “Swindle! Take me with you! I belong down there! In the Darkness!” He sobbed out, he was not all there in the head it seems. Another one named Blast Off got next to him.

“No, Vortex, these are just his earthly remains, he’s among the dark ones now. Fly, Swindle, fly up on your wings of flame.” He spoke, then choked out, “Swindle wouldn’t want this.”

Soon another mech, a senior named Onslaught got up, “You think so? Yeah, you’re right, I’m pretty sure our brother wouldn’t have liked being eaten by a fucking cannibal and buried before his 18th birthday. Wow, you two must have known him so well,” Another Combaticon tried to stop him but shrugged him off.

“By the time they found Swindle in that Primus-forsaken house, he looked like lithium lasagna, with teeth. I’d know, I had to identify his remains. Our brother… isn’t in the realm of the undead. He’s not flying around in the firmament on magical wings of flame. He’s in an overpriced rosewood box that is headed six feet downtown.” He weakly kicked the casket and broke down. Megatron watched the exchange unfold from a distance.

At school, they held a big memorial service for Swindle and a whole presentation on the buddy systems and curfews. But it seemed like no one really cared anymore, they just moved on, thinking that would be the end of it. But Megatron knew it won’t be. He went to the library to do research, paranormal research.

His digits gently traced the spines of the books, feeling the old worn plastic and leather binding. He grabs one and pulls it from the shelf. And begins to read.

The book was about demons, demonology, and the occult. The book was dusty and barely used, but it was certainly useful.

“ ‘Offering a virgin to Unicron’.” He read out loud to himself in a hushed whisper, seeing illustrations from illuminated manuscripts, paintings, and statues around the planet.

“ ‘If the sacrifice is impure…’.” He muttered.

“ ‘Human and demonic relations’.” He ignored the librarian occasionally glancing at him.

“ ‘Destroying a demon. Demons are weakest when hungry, but a blade to the spark is the surest way to kill the beast’.” He soon closed the book and went to the librarian to check it out. And made a beeline to the locker room.

In the locker room, students were washing themselves off after gym class in the showers, mechs were using the towels provided. The hot water fogging the washracks a little bit. In the back room, Orion was putting on his armor after changing out of his cheer uniform. He was sitting down on a bench, and soon finished getting ready, he looked up to see Megatron standing there.

“Maybe there’s a way to reverse the curse.” Megatron said. He sounded hopeful. He watched Orion grab a magazine he brought from home, ignoring him, Megatron tried again, “To save you.”

Orion merely shrugged.

“Being on the cycle is a curse,” He said nonchalantly, “Having a limp banana dick like the basketball coach? That’s a curse. This isn’t a curse.”

Megatron was shocked, “How can you say that?” He lowered his voice so the others wouldn’t overhear, “You’re killing people!”

Orion snarked back, “No, I’m killing bots. Specifically bots with spikes, those guys are just placeholders. They come and they go.” He punctuated the end of his sentence with a subtle shrug.

Megatron soon became desperate, “You’re my amica, and I want to help you, but I can’t let you kill again.”

Orion soon stood up from the bench, “That’s a lose-lose. Cause if I lose me, and you lose me, then Megs, you have nothing.” He soon gave a small cocky smile.

Megatron frowned and looked down at his amica, the size difference visible, yet standing up to his amica who is currently possessed by a cannibalistic demon is making him feel rather small.

“That’s not true, I have Starscream.” He pointed out, causing Orion to scoff and roll his optics.

“Oh please, I have more important things to worry about,” he grabbed his bag, “Like, which lucky bot is gonna have the first dance with me.”

Megatron glared, “I will finish you if I have to.” He tried to sound intimidating.

Orion merely tsked, “Okay, you can barely finish gym class.” He soon slung his bag over his shoulder and left the room.

“See you at the dance!” He said rather cheerily. Leaving Megatron all alone.

Out in the hallways, students were getting ready for the spring dance, banners were being hung up on the walls, streamers were dangling from the ceiling. Megatron sat on a bench, glancing around the room, he saw mechs talking to femmes, other mechs, or by themselves. Then he saw open wounds on the faces and necks and chests, torn open armor, energon oozing out, dull gray optics. He looked at Orion, who was talking to a femme, they hadn’t really talk since that night in his room or the spat in the locker room. Orion seemed to notice him and smiled slightly. Megatron drew a breath and blinked, he soon saw Orion smiling widely, pink energon dripping down his mouth and chin, like he just ate someone.

Soon Starscream walked in front of the smaller mech, seemingly snapping Megatron out of his nightmare.

He waved his hands in a jazz hand like motion to get his attention, “Hey, just bought our formal tickets. Did you make reservations at Blurr’s?”

Megatron looked at him, “Starscream, I can’t go to the dance with you.”

Starscream was shocked, “What? Why?”

Megatron answered, “Look, just trust me. You shouldn’t go at all.”

Starscream was now confused, “What’s going on? Are you breaking up with me?”

Megatron ignored his question, “Please, Star! I just need to show you something!”

Starscream then asked, with a tiny bit of annoyance, “Is this about Orion?”

Megatron answered, “Yes!” He reached for his bag, rambling, “But I promise you this is the last thing-”

Starscream cut him off, “Megatron, I care about you. A lot. As a person, not just some guy I made love to for four minutes the other night. And I’m scared of what’s happening to you. You’re acting really fucked up.”

Megatron looked at him, now holding the book he got from the library, he seemed desperate, “Please just let me show you.”

Starscream sighed, “Okay.”

Megatron began, “Orion’s evil.”

Starscream nodded, “I know.”

Megatron shook his head, “No, I mean he’s actually evil, not high school evil. I’ve been through the occult section at the library five times.”

Starscream muttered to himself, “Our library has an occult section?”

Megatron nodded, “Yeah it’s uh, it’s really small. You have to read this.” He opened the book to a page he bookmarked with a sticky note.

“Demonic transference. It’s something that happens when you try to sacrifice a virgin to Unicron without using an actual virgin. The femme and her band tried to sacrifice him in the woods. But what they didn’t know is that he hasn’t been a virgin since junior high. It all makes sense, read this. ‘If the Cybertronian sacrifice is impure, the result will still be attained but the demon will forever reside in the soul of the victim. They must forever feed on flesh to sustain the demon.’.”

Starscream nodded slowly, “Okay…”

Megatron exclaimed, “He’s eating bots! They make him really handsome and glowy… and his paintjob looks amazing. And then when he’s hungry, he’s weak and cranky and ugly. I mean, like, ugly for him.” He saw Starscream staring at him.

“Don’t you get it? The dance. It’ll be like an all-you-can-eat buffet!”

Starscream then said, “Megatron, I think you need help.”

Megatron’s optics widened, “Oh my Primus, you don’t believe me.”

Starscream shook his head, “It’s not that I don’t believe you. I just don’t believe this!”

Megatron was exasperated, “Primus! This is a nightmare!”

“Well what about the dance?” Starscream asked.

Megatron looked at him, “Who cares about the Primus dang dance, Star?”

Starscream answered, “I do! I ordered your corsage! It’s an orchid, it was like 12 dollars.”

Megatron sighed, “I’ll be at the dance, I just need to keep an optic on Orion. Promise you’re not gonna go.”

Starscream bit his lip, “Megs, I-I’m not your guy anymore?”

Megatron looked down, “Star, it’s not safe for us to be together right now.”

Starscream got up and left without saying another word, leaving Megatron all alone on the floor, sitting with the book on his lap, looking defeated.

#NightmareWrites #nightmarerants #Orion's Body #jennifer's body au #transformers shattered glass

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pers-books · 1 month

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We have a release date!

Repeat! We have a release date!

This is NOT a drill!

Big Finish have finally provided a release date for the first of The Fugitive Doctor boxsets!

January 2025.

According to the letters page of the most recent Vortex magazine, where someone was enquiring about this very issue, the delay was down to their 'friends at BBC Studios'. Which COULD (but only could!) mean that the Fugitive Doctor is coming back this year.

I sure hope so! It'd be a joy to see two Doctors who're not White on screen together!

(I am SO glad I took a look at my 'forthcoming' audios page on the BF website this morning after I downloaded today's release, otherwise I wouldn't have known.)

#Big Finish #Fugitive Doctor #Jo Martin #Doctor Who #Audio Drama

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thatlastdanceofchances · 2 years

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The Grey Mare

The Grey Mare is finally up on the Torchwood EU website with a content warning for pet death.

This is a very well written creepy tale!

It's not the heaviest on character work but there are enough small character moments to make me happy and they are really well done. Speaking of characters, I absolutely adore Annie and she works really well as a co-protagonist to Ianto.

Some more thoughts (but with spoilers) under the cut below.

Next month: No idea! There is some information in the Vortex magazine that is contradictory to what’s on the Big Finish website for the remaining three audios of this series so I guess we’ll see. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Ianto takes a gun on vacation. That man doesn’t know how to relax. Then again, he’s proven right...

I found the idea that rift energy sticks to Ianto very interesting (and it validates some fix-it fics ;-) ).

The music at the end during the phone call made me very emotional. Right in the feels. Well done, editors!

The trend continues: Ianto is not only adopting aliens but grannies - and sometimes alien grannies (looking at you Pat...).

#torchwood #big finish #the grey mare #ianto jones #torchwood eu project #impromptu opinion

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honeycombwerewolfe · 3 years

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I guess no one on my dash has checked out the new Vortex magazine from Big Finish...

(Oh I saw a post about it the other day and have it on my list of things to check out later if when I finally have some time and energy to do things that take any sort of concentration lol would have thought it had made it's rounds through the fandom by now =P)

#squirreltalk

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kathyprior4200 · 3 years

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A Villainous Meeting

“Good morning, my fucklings!”

Verosika Mayday, the pink succubus, strolled into the room, wearing her high heels, heart-shaped sunglasses, short black and white dress and her faux pink scarf. She blew a bubble of pink gum before spitting it out in a nearby trash can. The fellow employees sat at a cracked black round table with bloodstained high-backed chairs with eyes on the tops. The Wrath Ring imp Striker merely smirked and nodded as he fiddled with the wheat stalk in his mouth. He wore his usual gray and brown cowboy gear with a hat and boots. Fizzarolli, the robotic jester imp, looked around eagerly at the small office room decorated with circus posters and porn magazine covers. Verosika was shown in a seductive pose with her gang on one poster, while another poster showed a sinister Fizzarolli with handcuffs advertising a “Loo Loo Land’s Fizzy Buddy, Brand New Vibrating Toy, Use At Your Own Risk!” A few pictures here and there displayed Striker riding his black hell-horse BulletProof through the desert with a mane and tail of fire. Finally, Vortex, the dark grey hellhound bodyguard, stared at his phone, wearing all black clothing.

They were located somewhere in the Lust Ring under a pink sky in an abandoned building that looked like a warehouse from the outside. Spray-painted in red were the words “D.I.C.K. Headquarters,” on the door to the office.

“Remind me why you choose “dick” to be our name?” Striker muttered to Verosika.

“It’s spelled D.I.C.K. It stands for Demonic Immediate Crazed Killers,” Verosika replied. “Figured it described all of us well, because we do what I.M.P. does, only better.”

“You and your sexual innuendos,” Striker began, and then winked. “I like it.” Fizzarolli giggled.

Verosika cleared her throat. “Do any of you fuckers know why we’re here?”

“Because I took this job after you and I got drunk and did a one night stand?” Striker asked with a smirk.

“No!” Verosika bellowed in anger, though she knew it was true. She then blushed and stepped back. “I drank too much beelzejuice after returning back from Earth, alright? And you happened to be there staring at me with lust in your eyes with a bottle of Inferno 66 in hand. Let me tell you, sucking prisoner dick with your gang is worse than eating shit out of a toilet. Besides, I needed some time to recover after having to walk around after Blitzo took my parking spot. When we were together, he left me to pay for the hotel room, rang three rings around Wrath and maxed my credit card...”

“…on shitty horse-riding lessons, yeah yeah, I got it,” Striker said with a wave of his hand. “You told us the story like five times.”

“Is it because that imp was so jealous of my accomplishments at the circus that he set all of Loo-Loo Land on fire and allowed my robotic counterpart Robo Fizz to get eaten by a dragon?” asked Fizzarolli.

“How did you hear about that?” Vortex asked without looking up.

Fizzarolli turned nervous. “My boss Mammon heard about the incident and was furious. He said that unless I helped boost sales, fix the theme park and capture him…”

“Yeah, I know how you feel,” Verosika sighed. “My gang and I got a bunch of warnings and threats from daddy Ozzie.”

“You mean Asmodeus?” asked Vortex.

“Yeah. He wasn’t very happy that I nearly exposed the humans to the existence of demons. We go topside in disguise to feed on their lust every spring. If Blitzo hadn’t kept that fact secret…well let’s just say Valentino pales in comparison to what Ozzie can do to you.”

Everyone shivered at the prospect of the Ring Overlords’ plans.

“To answer your question, Verosika, it is because I failed to kill that pompous owl prince Stolas?” Striker asked. “I was this close to finishing off that wimp imp and persuading Blitzo to join me. He’s a formidable fighter, and he’s half succubus.”

Verosika crossed her arms. “There’s nothing special about him. He just pushes people away when they get too close and only cares about his job, murder and his stupid horses!”

“Hmm…he’d be a fun little toy to play with,” Striker mused as Fizzarolli smirked. “We can all agree on that, right?”

Everyone but Vortex murmured in agreement.

“Yes,” Verosika called, shoulders square. “That is the reason why we’re all here. Because of them!”

Verosika pointed to the whiteboard which had pictures of Blitzo, Moxxie, Millie, Loona and Stolas pinned on it. Several knives were stuck inside the pictures and scribbles in red on the white board read “Fuck I.M.P.!” “Striker Is Better Than You!” “Fizzarolli Was Here!” and “Verosika, Call Me For a Good Time!”

“And I’m gonna led this shit!” she added.

“What makes you the leader?” Striker inquired with a raised eyebrow.

“I’m not the leader per se. Stella organized this group and Striker recruited us,” Verosika explained. “Though I’m technically higher than imps, sinners and hellhounds, so I say the position is a good fit.”

Striker scowled. “We get treated like scum in Wrath enough as it is. I ain’t gonna play nice if you don’t show me some respect.”

“Prove to me you’re better than that scumbag Blitzo.”

“I already did…in bed at the club, remember?”

Fizzarolli laughed much to Verosika’s disgust.

“While I will admit it felt amazing, that’ll be the last time I ever sleep with an imp. And I certainly don’t need some rogue cowboy to get in the way of my revenge.”

“Need I remind you, missy,” said Striker, “That I’m the one who recruited you and the jester in the first place? After you were getting over your hangover, you told me to fuck off or else your friends would have their fun with me.”

“Yeah, and?”

“I then noticed your heart tattoo on your shoulder with “Blitzo” crossed out. Then I asked, ‘Having imp problems, too? Wishing to see a certain imp?’”

“And I said ‘no, none of your damn business, imp.’”

Striker continued, “But then I told you, ‘I’m on a covert mission to take down a worthless royal…and to meet up with I.M.P.s leader. Perhaps I could offer you my services to you, monetary and otherwise, if you could tell me more about him.’”

“Yes and I did,” she said. “I remembered Robo Fizz back when I worked in the circus with Blitzo and figured he’d be a good person to talk to.”

“Hmpth,” Fizzarolli interrupted. “His business may be impressive, but his jokes were utterly pathetic! I got to be the star of the shows while he got to be alone and unloved! Ha!”

Verosika briefly stared at him. “You sure you didn’t get jealous because Blitzo left you behind and made more money killing people?”

Fizzarolli turned slightly red. “What?! No! How stupid are you?”

“Perhaps smarter than you think,” Verosika remarked, her boobs bouncing slightly.

“Get a room, love-fuckers!” Fizzarolli mocked to Striker and Verosika. “At least I was the first villain to appear in the show! First is the best! And my Ring is higher than yours!”

“Oh partner, even a sex bot like you…”

“I’m not a bot!”

“…could never handle what’s under these jeans.”

Striker smirked and continued the story. “Then I told slutty clown about Blitzo and he seemed to understand who he was,” said Striker. “I said, ‘A Goetia is giving me cash to kill a royal and that imp leader from I.M.P. What do you say we bask in riches, glory and chaos?’”

“I remember saying, ‘Is this a scam? Loo Loo Land must be fixed!’” said Fizzarolli.

Striker recalled what he said back to Fizzarolli,“’Mammon sent you off on a mission, didn’t he? Just like Asmodeus gave a warning to Verosika and what Stella did to me. All our stories and failures are connected. Connected because of what those imps did. If you can help me track down I.M.P. and that prince…no more worries for you.’”

“The show must always go on,” mused Fizzarolli. “It wasn’t like I had many other options. As long as my boss is satisfied…”

“And mine…” added Verosika.

“And mine…” added Striker.

“Indeed, we must all complete this mission, or else we’re all dead,” Verosika finished.

“Double dead,” Vortex corrected in a low voice, making the others shiver. “The Seven Deadly Sins do have angelic weapons. You’ll wish you were frozen in the Ninth Circle.”

“Hell only has seven,” Fizzarolli added.

“Shut up.”

“Loo Loo Land burned down, Asmodeus and Mammon got together, we took the Hellevator through the Ring portals and the rest is history,” said Verosika. “Now I’m stuck with an imp and a robot.”

“I’m an imp!” Fizzarolli protested.

“You’re just a robot,” Verosika replied.

“With partial robotic features! The model for all Robo Fizzs made by Mammon himself!”

“Still just a sex toy,” said Verosika.

“A useful one, nevertheless. One who Stella herself deems valuable, right Striker?”

“She did say to me, ‘I don’t care who you have to go through.’ Never thought I’d be dealing with a bunch of hooligans from other Rings,” Striker remarked.

After several minutes of loud arguments and hisses, Vortex barked loudly. “Shut the fuck up!”

Everyone then sat down in silence before Vortex stared at his phone again. “I never get paid enough for this shit,” he muttered.

“Somebody tell me any useful information about I.M.P. before I lose my shit!” Verosika barked, almost going into her demonic shadow form.

“The only reason why I’m here,” said Striker, his voice turning calmer and darker, “Is for my money from Stella. And revenge of course. Let me tell you where I think Blitzo will be at next.”

The villains crept closer.

“I came to the Lust Ring because I heard from Stella that this is where Stolas likes to “entertain” himself as it were.” His glowing eyes spiraled in yellow-green hypnotic circles. “Rumor has it that he goes to Ozzie’s place to cheer himself up. Heard he suffered quite a breakup from his dear hurt wife. And to have Stella potentially gain custody over his dear daughter…man that must’ve broken that bird’s heart.”

“Oooh what a charming little theater!” Fizzarolli remarked. “Stripper dances, pole dances, lots of lustful siren songs. Winged imps serve you food and other imps are in cages for display! Hahahaha! It is almost as good as the Big Top in Loo Loo Land!”

“Was, you mean,” Striker smirked before the jester seethed.

“I still perform there,” Verosika said. “When I’m not traveling around the Rings on tour. Lust is my home, after all.”

“Greed is mine!” Fizzarolli said.

“You already know where I’m from,” said Striker. “No one fucking cares.”

“Mammon and Asmodeus heard the news as well,” said Fizzarolli. “I heard Stella had a meeting with them at midnight last night. That was before we all got our orders to come here to Lust.”

Vortex looked up in concern. “It’ll only be a matter of time before Lucifer hears about this, too. Not just about the trouble I.M.P. has caused, but now that humans know of Hell…”

“Let’s focus on one problem at a time,” said Verosika with a deep breath. “We’re in no rush. It’s not like our leader’s gonna call us and demand…”

Just then, Verosika’s pink computer beeped and rang.

“Shit,” she muttered. “It’s her.”

Everyone straightened up as Verosika pushed a button. Stella’s angry white feathered face appeared on the Zoom/Doom screen. She scrutinized all their faces with pink glowing eyes, her face appearing on the screen.

“Striker,” Stella began, her golden crown shining on her head. “So this is the gang you recruited?”

“Yes ma’am!” he grinned.

“Hmm…” she pondered. There’s you…there’s some clown imp, there’s a fine-looking succubus…from who knows where…”

“The clown is Fizzarolli or Robo Fizz,” said Striker. “The succubus is Verosika.”

“Working for a queen, Striker?” Verosika asked. “How…”

“Long story, I already told you,” Striker said. “She’s desperate…”

“You bet that’s right!” Stella barked. “Then again, I’m…mildly impressed that you managed to get such a…diverse crew together.” She didn’t bother to hide her disgust. “Well done.”

Striker beamed with pride.

“But we’re far from done! You have no idea how long I’ve waited to properly unleash these feelings in me.”

Fizzarolli giggled and Striker elbowed him hard.

“That stupid prick of my husband thinks he can sleep all he wants with that assassin imp…in our fucking bed behind my back! If he stays any longer, my family will be a laughing stock. I’ll be stripped of my royal status and goodness knows what bad influence he’ll have on Octavia.”

Stella paused, brief hurt in her voice. She didn’t dare cry, though. “Sometimes I wish he didn’t have to die. That all three of us could be a good family again like we once were. He could’ve been a proper responsible father, kept the grimoire safe from the imp, and none of this would’ve happened.”

Fizzarolli cried tears at the rant while Vortex rolled his eyes. Striker yawned. Verosika, however, seemed to listen with a common understanding. She and Blitzo had been together and then they were broken up and fighting. Although she wanted power and revenge like Fizzarolli and Striker, she knew what it was like to get the short end of the stick in a relationship.

“Then again, I was forced into marrying Stolas millennia ago by my parents. It’s obvious I’d concern myself with status and wealth and hold my resentment inside.”

‘All that wealth, all that power,’ thought Striker, greedily. ‘Watch her talk on and on until the rug slips from under her feet…and the glory becomes all mine!’

“I love my daughter and Stolas…I really do…but…I must do what has to be done!” Right then, her regal imposing side was back.

She stared into their eyes, glaring at Striker in particular. “First of all, if any of you land a finger on my daughter, I’ll make sure your screams are heard by every Ring in Hell. She must not be harmed. But…if I have to use Octavia as leverage as a last resort to bring Stolas to his knees…then so be it. I don’t care what we have to do…I just want him dead. Do you all understand?”

“Yes ma’am,” said Striker. The others nodded.

“Good. Now to review the plan. Stolas and I recently had our breakup. He will be going to the same place he always goes to when he’s upset: Ozzie’s place. If you spot I.M.P., follow them, but do not attack yet.”

She continued. “Striker, your objective is the same: kill Stolas with your angelic weapons. Keep them safe in your hands at all times, but eliminate anyone who gets in your way.”

Striker already glowered at Fizzarolli and Verosika who were staring closely at his pistol.

“If you use it on anyone else important,” Stella said, suspicion already in her eyes. “I’ll fuck you with your own horns.”

Striker nodded, with the tip of his hat.

“Verosika, you will track down Blitzo and distract him inside the club,” said Stella. “Use any manipulative means necessary to catch him off guard. Fizzarolli, you and Asmodeus will sneak behind Moxxie and take down the other I.M.P. members. Verosika’s crew and some Robo Fizzs will also join in.”

She added in a sing-song voice, “You’ll all receive an extra bonus and royalty favors if you bring me their heads!”

Fizzarolli grinned. “This is gonna be so fun!”

“The rewards. Striker, you’ll be rewarded by me for killing Stolas. 10,000 souls or more. And a new home in Wrath for you and your family.”

Striker had to roll his eyes. He didn’t have a family anymore. He didn’t just want 10,000 souls. Now that he thought about it, he wanted much more.

“Fizzarolli, Loo-Loo land will be repaired and you’ll get to lead future productions in Lu Lu World. Plus money, your own brand and perhaps…” she whispered so only he could hear, “…freedom.”

“Oh goody!”

“Verosika…more tours, more sex and money for you. You’ll be the star of every Ring in Hell.”

Verosika grinned and fluffed her long pink-white hair.

Stella smirked in a manner unfit for a queen. “And to make things a little more fun…as a way to show Stolas what his infidelity means…a special prize for the first one to kill Blitzo for me…”

She playfully massaged her boobs under her pink dress. All the villains minus Vortex blushed in delight and shock as they knew what she was implying. Verosika’s gang in the far back of the room watched while eating popcorn. Vortex made a face of disgust.

Seconds later, Stella was regal again. “And you there, dog!” Stella called, making Vortex look up. “Verosika has a special assignment for you.”

“What?” he asked.

“Keep a close eye on that loony hellhound of theirs,” Verosika grinned deviously.

Worry was etched onto Vortex’s face as he nodded. Though he had a girlfriend, he had found Loona adorable at the beach on Earth. He couldn’t believe what he had to do now.

“I’ll keep you updated on Stolas’ whereabouts and when it’s time to move,” Stella finished. “Do not disappoint me.”

The screen went dark.

“Well, that’s a wrap folks,” said Verosika. “Meeting dismissed. Fuck around, get some sleep, we have a big day tomorrow.”

Verosika took out her phone and began texting.

“Who are you texting?” Vortex asked.

“There’s this pink southern succubus sinner named Martha,” Verosika grinned. “She says she leads an army in the name of Satan and they want blood after being killed by you know who on Earth. Ralphie and her two kids live with her there. She also wants this Mayberry sinner dead.”

“What does that mean?” Striker asked.

Verosika grinned. “It means…we have a potential ally in the Pride Ring!”

“Awesome!” said Fizzarolli. “Their enemies keep growing and growing!”

The villains laughed.

“With so many souls seeking revenge, I.M.P. won’t know what hit ‘em!” Fizzarolli cackled.

“Yes, but let’s focus on our main mission first,” said Striker. “Perhaps we’ll have the honor of getting to them first!”

The villains laughed again and retired to bed.

‘This plan better work,’ Striker thought. ‘Because Stolas’ blood will not be the only blood that’ll be on my hands soon enough…’

#helluvaboss #villains #legion of doom

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