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#the book i'll never write
aphroditesanxiety · 8 months
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The only person I ever believed when they told me it wasnt my fault was the devil who let tears fall over me. When a demon cries for you it is never out of pity. It is out of shame and sorrow. The angels praise you for making it out alive but the heathens cry with you when the nightmares come. The devil saw my pain. The devil does not praise my strength when he knows I never should have had to use it. We are not the only ones god abandoned.
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The love I Felt
I’m not sorry I fell for you 
or 
maybe I fell for the idea of you that sounds more accurate doesn’t it.
I fell for the love I think I saw that no one else did.
The sweet nothing that seems to pick and kiss at me like nothing I have ever felt.
I have always loved to much with all i have that was my problem not yours right 
Your sweet when you want but oh so bitter when sour like a greedy kid i keep coming back to you 
I don't blame you for making me fall in love with a  drought of a man nor do I blame myself for being the flood in your backyard.
I do however blame myself for falling for the idea of love and feeling loved
I fell quickly just like you wanted, my last love was horrid he made me feel things i didn’t want but yet he was amazing in his own way it brought me the understanding i’m not everyone’s cup of tea fuck it i’m not even tea i’m the black coffee with a lemon wedge a unique an acquired taste i myself am still learning to love.
When you admit to hating and loving me in the same night i knew i was just utterly fucked. You manipulate to see if I care or how far you can make me go. 
i ‘m not stupid but you don’t think i am just blind and young i guess you are my best friend but like so many others of my best friends we will one day be nothing more than passing strangers with ghost stories to tell of each other. I’ll see you happy with the family you always wanted and for a brief sec i’ll be reminded of what we had 
But happiness becomes you just like solitude will one day become me it's better that way don’t you agree.
I hope one day you look back in years to come  and tell your kids and grandkids about the girl that loved everyone so much she forgot how to love herself.
That my love would be the day I'll know you truly did love me as you would have honored me in the heights of my idols and  legends to be.
S.B
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vodkatales · 2 years
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For old times sake is actually such a heartbreaking and beautiful sentiment. Like, let’s do it for the love that used to be here. It is reason enough.
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“I believed you even when I knew you were lying.”
- S. C. C.
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threewordusername · 4 months
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i never wanted you to leave.
six-word poem.
d.b.a
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ninasdrafts · 1 month
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charmingwinds · 3 months
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I read somewhere that the act of peeling oranges for someone is considered love. I found it stupid.
Then one day, I was home after a tiring day and there were oranges sitting on the counter. I knew they had to be eaten that day, a day later, they’d be rotten.
I was just too tired.
I completed my chores, and the oranges were still there, colourful and nudging, hoping I’d pick them up.
I walked past, and found my bed. My head comfortably rested on the pillows.
Those damn oranges.
I got up, sat on the counter and peeled them grudgingly. As I ate in silence, I understood what they meant. It was love alright, not peeling oranges but being taken care of.
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leavemeslowly · 22 days
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“I want to take my heart off my sleeve, it has grown too heavy.”
-m.n.
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aphroditesanxiety · 9 months
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I miss you. I'll never say it. But I miss you.
I'll never forget you. I wish I'd said it. But I'll never forget you.
I love you. I wish you'd said it back. But I love you.
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Oh yes there are things worse than being alone but often it takes decades to realize this and most often when you do its too late there is nothing worst than too late
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vodkatales · 2 years
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How can we be allowed to feel so much for people who don't feel anything for us?
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vomitingwords · 1 month
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"I don't want to think about it now," one of my closest friends once told me. "I'll think about what I can do once I'm already in that situation," she even added.
Before we got into this conversation, I was ranting about my life. And why are things not happening the way I want them to? As if the universe is against what I want. These past few months have quite stressed me out, and I don't have anyone to tell these things to. Because, honestly, I never wanted to bother anyone. I am just a typical person who keeps things to herself. Especially if it's too personal for me to share.
Earlier, while I was traveling to work, this conversation struck me once again. And I just remembered that I also said that before to someone I know. I used to think that way. I used to tell other people the same phrase every time they asked me what I would do if I were in a certain situation. And you see, I used to not overthink too much. Yes, I am an overthinker, but not to the point that I am experiencing now. I just thought that my overthinking got the best of me. I'm on the verge of quitting everything that I'm passionate about. In short, I was so close to giving up and stopping everything that makes my heart feel alive. I haven't felt so genuine in a while, as if everything I wrote was nothing but mere words that have no meaning at all. Something I don't really feel like writing about. I stopped having a long conversation with anyone. I stopped listening to what they really had to say. And just think, think, and think until it's time for me to go to sleep.
But then I remembered who I was before. I remembered that girl who doesn't easily give up on things just because she's stressed out. I remembered that girl who loved to lift people up with her words. I remembered someone who would not let anyone stop her from achieving what she wanted. I remembered who I was. I remembered myself saying, "Let's see what I will do if I'm in that situation." Even if I am not sure what I can exactly do when that moment comes, even if I'm not sure if I'm still alive to witness that, I remembered how hopeful I was. And I remembered how much faith I have that things will always work out. And even if they don't, it just means that it wasn't meant for me at all.
I just want to tell you that sometimes you have to remind yourself of the old you—the you who have lived and survived in the past—just to get you where you are right now. And remember that if you don't like where you are right now, you still have a chance to do something that might change where you're going. It might be a tough road to walk on. But the most important thing is that you've done something. You've never abandoned yourself and just given up on what you really want to do.
Hello, I'm just dropping by // ma.c.a
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hipsternerd9 · 1 year
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My nights were filled with thoughts of why wasn’t I good enough for you.
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divyachamaria · 2 years
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I have a special love for those people who despite it all, manage to stay soft. Who keep their heart kind and their soul warm. It takes real strength to keep those qualities when life kicks you down.
— Divya C.
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