#the brat brigade

[absolutepokemontrash]

Happy Father’s Day with the Half Demon Kids!

(Including the Hell Timeline kids! Yay!)

Genre: Floof

Warnings: None

••••••••••••••••••••

“Bah humbug.”

“It isn’t Christmas, Lord Darius.”

“I know, but bah anyway.”

Darius sat curled up on one of the many plush red love seats in one of the palace’s sitting rooms. Barbatos was behind him, vacuuming up the carpet and straightening up a few bits and baubles on the tables.

“What has you grouchy today?” Barbatos asked, with all the godlike patience in the world.

“Everyone’s been actin’ so stupid lately.” Darius mumbled, wrinkling his nose as the whirring of the vacuum got louder and louder as Barbatos began to clean the area closest to the couch.

“Pardon me, Lord Darius,” Barbatos said, his voice raised. “But I can’t quite hear you.”

“I said,” Darius gritted his teeth, sitting up and turning to face his father’s butler with an indignant frown. “EVERYONE’S BEEN ACTIN’ STUPID LATELY!”

“Oh dearie me.” Barbatos mused as he switched off the vacuum and admired his handiwork. “I wonder why that could be.”

“You know something…”

“I know many things.”

“Stop being like that, Barbatos! I order you to tell me what you know!”

“I know that Mr. Fuzzy Cuddle Bear is in desperate need of a wash.”

Darius flushed as red as his hair and quickly sputtered out a reply. “N-not that! About today! What’s happening today!?”

“Hopefully Mr. Fuzzy Cuddle Bear’s bath.”

“DAH!” Darius threw up his hands and hopped off the couch, he stormed out of the sitting room without a second glance at the chuckling butler. “Fine! I’ll find out on my own!”

Barbatos took an unbutlerly moment to quietly laugh about his “victory” over the young prince. Poor Diavolo though…

“Ah, Father, there you are.”

Turning his head, Barbatos saw his hoodie-clad child step into the room, a red velvet cupcake with a smear of white frosting in his hand.

“Tulsi, did you need something-“

“Happy Father’s Day, Barbatos!”

Bursting out from behind Tulsi, Cecilia and Luke thrust a nicely wrapped, thin box into Barbatos’ hands. ‘From Circe, Cecil, and Tulsi’ was written in Cecil’s near-perfect handwriting.

“Yeah, what they said.” Tulsi said with a lopsided grin as he gently placed the cupcake on top of the box.

“Why, thank you both.” Barbatos said, a genuine smile managing to spread its way across his face as he sat down on one of the armchairs and opened the box. His eyes widened when he saw the cover of one of his favourite death metal albums in original record form. Oh how well the children knew him… it almost brought a tear to his eye…

“How did you three manage to get this?” Barbatos asked, gently turning the object over in his hands.

“Found it at a pawn shop a month ago.” Tulsi said with a shrug, but the little grin on his face spoke a million words. “Glad you like it.”

“Yeah! Luke and I helped make the cupcake! Try it! Try it!” Cecilia urged, rocking back and forth on the balls of their feet.

The cupcake was almost expertly made, a not-too-sweet cream cheese filling, pleasantly rich in flavour, and a nice soft cake to boot. Delicious!

“Mmm…” Barbatos mumbled with a nod. “Very nicely done, Cecil and Luke.”

“Yes!” Luke whispered, trying to discreetly fist pump.

“Not to break up the conversation, but wasn’t Darius lounging around in here?” Tulsi asked, noting the empty loveseat.

“Ah, right. Young Lord Darius appears to not know what day it is. What a pity.” Barbatos said with a borderline sarcastic shake of his head, the smile he clearly had to muscle through giving his mild delight at the situation away.

“Oh no!” Cecil’s hands flew to their face and clasped their cheeks. “Poor Diavolo isn’t going to get even a cursory ‘happy Father’s Day!’ I have to go tell him!”

“Why even bother, he’s mean.” Luke said, rolling his eyes. “He probably wouldn’t even plan to say anything to Diavolo if he knew…”

“I wouldn’t go that far, Lukey-Pookey.” Tulsi said with a pinch of one of Luke’s cheeks. “Dare looooooovvvvves Dia. Just give him some time. He’ll figure it out, right Father?”

“We can hope,” Barbatos said with a smile, “we can hope.”

—————————

Lucifer was working in his office at RAD, as usual. The room was significantly less comfortable and quiet than his office at home, and completely unsupplied with Lucifer’s Demonus collection, but he managed to muscle through it.

As his hand glided over the papers, he briefly pondered the date of one of the sheets. June 18th…

A light scoff left Lucifer’s lips as he remembered Venus’ seeming lack of memory of the date. Ugh, was he going to have to quote Mulan again when Venus rushed in for comfort about forgetting the day again?

The door to Lucifer office swung open, and speak of the half demon and they shall appear, Venus stood proudly at the entrance, a present bag in hand.

“Father~, father~, faaaaatherrrrrr~,” Venus said in a sing-song voice as they practically slid towards his desk. “I didn’t forget this year~.”

The corners of Lucifer’s mouth twitched up into a half-smile as he took the bag from Venus, a partly exasperated sigh escaping his lips. “Aren’t I a lucky demon?”

“Damn right you are~,”

“Having a child who remembers a date that repeats every year for once.”

“Just open the present old man~,”

They were really keeping up the singing, huh? No matter, Lucifer opened up the bag and pulled out a… piece of printer paper. It was awfully wrinkled, and also blank. The demon of Pride raised an eyebrow and held up the blank piece of paper.

“What’s this supposed to mean?”

“Oh shit, that was the result of a paper jaaam~, oh fuck it.” Venus dropped the singing bit and pushed their glasses up the bridge of their nose. “We’re going on that factory tour you wanted to do, tomorrow. Diavolo and Darius are coming too. Not that Dare knows, he’d put up a stink.”

Lucifer chuckled softly and expertly tossed the blank, wrinkled printer paper into his trash can. “Thank you very much, Venus. I appreciate it.”

“Ah!” Venus’ face noticeably brightened as they finger gunned Lucifer’s face. “That slight tension in your cheeks, that little raise of your eyebrow, you’re mega-happy right now~!”

“Perhaps.”

“Perhaps pershmaps! I knocked it out of the park!” Venus mimed swinging a baseball bat as they turned and skipped out of the room. “Move it motherfuckers! I won Father’s Day!”

“LANGUAGE!”

——————

Percy fumbled with the box in their hands, the sloppily wrapped gift-box was weirdly bulky and heavy for what was inside. The half demon knocked on their father’s door, an excited smile spreading across his face with every thump against the wood.

“Daaaaaad! It’s meeeee!”

“What’s the password?”

Oof, ice cold… undeterred, Percy smiled and began to recite the latest iteration of his father’s passwords. “The Lord of Shadows wished upon a star,”

“That one day his enemies would leave his land,”

“And the star that came crashing from the heavens was his hero,”

The door opened, and Percy stepped into the messy blue tinted room. “Hi dad! Hi Henry 2.0!”

Henry 2.0 did not reply. He was a fish.

“What is it, Percy?” Levi said, taking off his headphones and pausing his game. “I’m in the middle of-“

“I got you something!” Percy said as he plopped down on the beanbag chair next to his dad, a beaming smile on his face. He pushed the box forward into Levi’s arms. “Happy day celebrating people who aren’t virgins!”

“WHAT?!” Levi shrieked as he toppled backwards out of his beanbag chair and onto the chip-bag and Gatorade covered floor.

“What?” Percy tilted their head and blinked a few times. “It’s what Ash calls it.”

“It’s… it’s…” Levi’s hands scrambled for his DDD, and after some frantic tapping, he shoved the screen into Percy’s face. “Father’s day! Not… that!”

“Oh.” Percy said, then shrugged and pushed the box forward again. “Open your present!”

Levi hesitantly took the box and tore off the wrapping paper, then squinted as he tried to see the pictures on the box in such abysmal lighting.

“Should I turn on the lights?” Percy asked, getting up to do just that.

“No!” Levi snapped. “Do you want to blind me, Percy?”

“N-no, but Lucifer says it’s not healthy to only have the aquarium lights and the lights of your electronics in your room…”

“Mmm…” Levi clearly wasn’t paying attention, he held the box up, and it caught the perfect light from the aquarium, and the Avatar of Envy shrieked in delight. “CATBOY HEADPHONES! The real deal, too!”

“Yeah! Do you like them?!”

“Yes! Yesyesyesyesyesyesyesyes!” Levi repeated over and over as he tore open the box and placed the headphones on his head, the blue cat ears snapped upright, and began to twitch.

“They connect to your real emotions! Just like a real cat’s ears!”

“HSJSMREMSJNDRNSNSNSNSNDSLSKDNEKS-“

“How’d you make that sound in real-“

Percy was cut off by Levi picking them up and crushing them into a hug. “I love them so so much! And they’re the real high quality ones too! Thank you, Percy!”

“Eheh!” Percy’s adorable dimpled smile could have lit up the room. “Great! I knew it would make for a great Not-a-Virgin Day gift!”

“Don’t call it that!”

———————

“Pop, pop, popcorn!” Ash slid into their father’s room with barely even a knock, causing Mammon, who was hunched over his pool table trying to take a shot, to flub his technique.

“Damn it, kid! Can’t ya knock?!”

“Nope!” Ash said with a cheeky grin, they grabbed one of the pool cues that were lying scattered on the ground and twirled it in their free hand. “Up for a game, old man?”

“Old?!” Mammon snapped, levelling the pool cue at Ash like he was holding a sword. “I’ll show you old-”

Ash laughed as they held up their cue to block the downward swing of Mammon’s. The battle was wonky and ridiculous as the two stepped over and around old cups of ramen, dirty laundry, and wrinkled up rescripts while whacking their pool cues against each other.

“I don’t think this is how pool is played!” Ash said, shifting his weight so the plastic bag with Mammon’s present inside was clearly visible, but juuuuuust out of reach.

“Oi! What’s in there?”

“You’ll have to kill me for it!”

“HAH!” Mammon threw back his head and rolled his eyes, his tuft of white hair was an absolute mess from the fight and was ever so slightly brushing against his eyelids. “I’ve fought with pirates, Ash, there’s no way in hell I’m gonna- OW!”

Ash swung their pool cue down on Mammon’s knuckles, causing him to drop his cue right to the ground.

“Gotcha! Guess you really are an old man!”

“Ah shaddup…” Mammon said with a light tint of redness to his cheeks.

“I’m feelin’ all generous today,” Ash held out the plastic bag. “For you, old man.”

Mammon greedily snatched up the bag, and pulled out a box of… dice. Nice looking gold dice, but just dice.

“Huh,” A smirk appeared on Mammon’s face as he inspected the box. “Nice, kiddo.”

“You don’t think those are just plain old dice, do you?” Ash snickered. “What do you take me for?”

“Eh? What do ya mean?”

Ash snatched the box out of Mammon’s hand and shook it, the dice inside rattled. “These are special dice. You can put some of your magic into them, and they’ll land on whatever numbers you’re thinkin’ of. Perfect for throwin’ off people who think you’re cheating!”

Mammon stood still with his eyes as wide as quarters, and Ash felt their stomach drop into their gut. “D-do you not like-“

“I FUCKIN’ LOVE IT!” Mammon suddenly snatched the box back with one and and then hooked an arm under Ash’s shoulder blades and swept them up into a spin. “EVEN BETTER THAN LAST YEAR’S GIFT!”

“Aw what?” Ash said after sighing in relief. “Didn’t like last year’s sunglasses?”

“Oh screw off, ya know I love those.”

“Tsk, anyway,” Ash straightened up their shirt after they were set down and fixed their hair, pushing it back into its normal slicked-back appearance. “Happy Not-A-Virgin day, Pops.”

“Wait what-”

———————

Beel grit his teeth and pulled himself up once again, with just one arm. Ever muscle from his deltoids down to his forearms burned from the strain, but he was strong enough to push through and keep going.

“You’re doing great, dad.”

“Faster! Faster!”

The two little ankle weights, Pepper and Cane, were latched onto Beel’s legs and were shouting out encouragements and orders, much to the Avatar of Gluttony’s appreciation.

“Sorry Cane,” Beel grunted as he pulled himself up again, relieving his right arm of the strain and beginning to do pull-ups with his left. “Can’t really move any faster than this right now.”

“Aw man…”

“I still think you’re doing good, dad.”

“Thanks Pepper.”

Eventually, after a few more pull-ups, Beel eventually let go, and began to knead at his exhausted muscles.

The twins unlatched from Beel’s legs and looked up at him with a level of reverence the demon hadn’t seen from even his most devoted fans and followers. And Beel was the centre demon of actual cults.

“How do you feel?”

“Feel buffer? Feel stronger?!”

Beel let his hands rest on either twin’s head and ruffled their hair. “I feel like my arms are jelly.”

The demon’s stomach suddenly growled, which caused two more smaller growls to echo from the twins.

“Oh! Right!” Cane snapped their fingers and began to tug Beel out of the RAD gym and into the hallway.

“Where are we going?”

“We made a Father’s Day feast for you in the cafeteria.” Pepper said, calm as ever as they took their father’s other hand and also lightly tugged him forward.

“Mmmmm,” Beel was already drooling. “What’s in this feast? Hellfire roasted pulled pork? Hellmato soup? Mmmmm…”

“You’ll see~!” Cane said with a conspiracy laden grin.

The twins threw open the doors of the cafeteria, and Beel’s jaw dropped.

Cheeseburgers… as far as the eye could see… perfect and still steaming, the heavenly smell entering the Avatar of Gluttony’s nostrils and nearly making him pass out and ascend right back to the Celestial Realm…

“D-dad?” Pepper’s voice piped up.

“Come on! Snap out of it!” Cane lightly slapped Beel’s hand a few times, trying to break him out of his stupor. “I think we broke ‘im, Pep.”

“You two…” Beel said, slowly stepping forward. “This is… amazing!”

Beel grabbed both twins by the hand, soreness in his arms forgotten, and an absolutely massive purr began to rumble in his chest. “Let’s eat together!”

———————

Surrounded in a plane of comfort unknown to most humans, Arien slept soundly and peacefully, without a care in the world. The young half demon of sloth was snoozing away in a bed piled high with the most high quality of pillows and blankets, with a humidifier going strong and a fan for white noise. All was perfect…

Until they suddenly felt an extra weight on their napping spot.

The half demon’s eyes snapped open, not that they could see much through the mountain of pillows and blankets they had over them. They gave the air a few cursory sniffs, then frowned.

“What do you want, You old bat?”

“Where’s my Father’s Day present, offspring of mine?” Belphie’s soft and sleepy voice asked, as almost always, there was a twinge of mischief to his tone.

Arien felt Belphegor stretch like a cat from… somewhere on the bed. He couldn’t exactly tell through all the blankets and pillows.

“You’re getting nothing and liking it.” Arien snapped, sleepily rubbing at his eyes. “Now shut up and let me sleep.”

“Tsk, little brat.” A pillow thwacked Arien right in the face. “Show some respect.”

“No.”

“Well then, I guess I’m just going to have to take a present myself then.”

“Eh- hey!”

Arien found themselves flipped onto their back and staring up at Belphegor, who had a borderline devious smirk on his face.

“What the hell do you- HEY! PFFFFFF- HAHAHAHAHAHAHA-”

“What the hell do you think I’m doing?” Belphie asked, tilting his head as he mercilessly tickled Arien. “What the hell you do think you’re doing? Not giving me anything for Father’s Day?”

“Screw- HA- OFF!”

“Hold on just a minute,” Belphie said with a mischievous smirk. “You set all this up? This entire little pillow Fort, all for yourself?”

“YEAH! Now get- HAHAHAHA-”

Dodging a few flailing kicks, Belphie kept up the pressure. “Really now? It seems way too big for just one person. It could fit four more, even. Planning on inviting me, Beel, and Cane and Pepper?”

“N-NO!” Arien lied through almost painful fits of laughter, all the while kicking and flailing every which way.

“Huh…” Belphie said with a shrug. “If it’s not for me, then, I’m making it for me.”

The Avatar of Sloth suddenly stopped his onslaught of tickles, flopped to Arien’s right, and trapped them in a cuddle-cage.

“Night, brat. Happy Father’s Day to me.”

“Hmph…” Arien wrinkled their nose, but shifted over slightly to get comfortable and let their eyes flutter shut. “Night, old man.”

———————

“Screw off, Darius.”

“Just tell me what day it is, Lyssa!” Darius snapped as he trailed after the half demon of wrath. The girl was dressed in a black leather jacket, a white tee shirt, a pink tutu, and black and green striped knee socks, safe to say, her fashion sense was as bad as her father’s.

“I have stuff to do, dammit!” Lyssa hissed back, dropping a giant, brown, cardboard box on the dining room table, and taking out various pieces of gold metal work, and what looked like scale models of the planets.

“Is it some kinda… space day..?” Darius asked, squinting as Lyssa’s nimble fingers began twisting and snapping pieces of the model planetary system together with a level of expertise that the prince couldn’t help but marvel at.

Lyssa spared the time to glare up at Darius, her cartoon cat hair pins that helped her black scrunchies hold her long blonde pigtails in place seemed to be glaring at him too. “Are you perhaps, an idiot?”

“HEY!” Darius was prepared to smack a hand down on the table and admonish the kid, but held back. This was Lyssa, and If Darius made her upset or triggered her in any way, he’d never forgive himself… mainly because Satan would have committed regicide and tore him limb from limb. “Just… tell me what the fuck is going-”

“Father!” Lyssa suddenly sprung from her feet, the model put together in an expert amount of time. Satan had walked into the dining hall and was quickly tackled into a hug by Lyssa. “I made something for you! Happy Father’s Day!”

“FATHER’S WHAT NOW?!” Darius shouted, bursting out of his seat with his eyes wider than saucers. “FUCK I GOTTA GO!”

Satan and Lyssa both watched, completely bewildered as Darius suddenly bolted for the exit.

“What was his problem?” Satan asked, gently setting Lyssa down on the floor.

“No clue.” Lyssa shrugged. “But look what I made you!”

Satan allowed himself to be tugged to the dining room table where the model sat, each planet was expertly crafted and set to scale, they all gently rotated around the sun, all the parts moving in harmony.

“You… made this?” Satan asked, staring down at the little contraption before him.

“Y-yeah…” Lyssa said, suddenly beginning to twiddle her thumbs. “I mean… you gave me that book on outer space a while back, and I really liked it, I just wanted to show that your money didn’t go to waste on me or any-“

“Lyssa, Lyssa,” Satan slowly raised his hands to quiet the child, then gently rested one on her shoulder, careful to make sure each of his movements were perfectly choreographed so Lyssa could see what was going to happen. “I love it. Did you make it all by yourself?”

The half demon seemed to visibly deflate with relief, then nodded. “I painted the planets, and using the parts of an old metal chandelier that I found in the trash outside of RAD, I just had to fit everything together and make it move. I used this old motor from a toy robot that Luke said I could use, and attached it to the bottom, here.”

Lyssa slowly pointed out every little connecting piece and part of her little contraption, and Satan hung onto every word. He was sure to interject with compliments every now and then. He had a very clever child after all, and he needed to make sure that she knew it too.

“So um… yeah…” Lyssa scuffed her feet on the dining room carpet. “Happy Father’s Day, dad…”

“Thank you, Lyssa,” Satan, gentle as a kitten, pulled Lyssa in for a hug. “What do you say we go to the planetarium sometime and you can show me what else you’ve learned?”

————————

“Aaaaah,” Asmo sighed in contentment as Solomon filed his nails. “This is the life…”

“Yep, definitely.” Cecil said with a tense grin as Circe sat across from them, her eyes narrowed as she aggressively filed Cecil’s index fingernail down to a useless nub. “The life for sure…”

“Come on Circe,” Solomon chided. “Be gentle.”

“I am.” Circe said, as monotone as ever. “I thought Father’s Day was just supposed to be between you and me.”

“We’re a happy little family though, aren’t we?” Asmo cooed, leaning over and pinching Circe’s cheek with his free hand.

“Sure.” The girl replied. She acted a lot older, and a lot more bitter than most ten year olds… Cecil thought to themselves.

“So about that crazy weather we’ve been havin-”

“CECIL!”

The door to Asmo’s room was practically kicked open by Darius, who stood wide eyed and frantic at the door.

“Oh! Darius! I was looking for you earlier but I couldn’t-“

“CRAM IT! WHAT DO YOU GET SOMEONE FOR FATHER’S DAY?!”

“Uhhh…” Cecil pursed their lips and shrugged. “Spa day..?”

“Fuuuuu…” Darius growled. “What’d the chihuahua get Simeon?!”

“Pastries I think…” Cecil murmured, suddenly flinching when Circe began to sloppily apply pink nail polish to… seemingly everywhere except Cecil’s nails.

“You don’t know for sure?! Solomon! You live with them! What happened?!”

“I’m not sure either to be honest.” Solomon said with a calm shrug of his shoulders. “Before I left, Luke was being bathed with holy light, and I didn’t really want to talk to the old man upstairs, so I let him be.”

“Fine! Food it is then!” Darius then turn tail and booked it down the hall.

“So uh…” Cecil nervously giggled. “Happy Father’s Day..?”

“Happy Father’s Day!” Asmo and Solomon repeated.

“Yeah yeah… happy…” Circe chimed in with gritted teeth.

————————

After grabbing a cupcake at Madame Scream’s and running at top speed back to the Demon Lord’s Castle, Darius kicked off his shoes and into the throne room, intent on getting to his father’s office before it was too late.

“Ah, young lord Darius-“

“DAMN IT BARBATOS!” Darius skidded to a halt and pointed an accusatory finger at the butler. “You didn’t tell me it was Father’s Day!”

“I didn’t realize that was in my job description.” Barbatos said with a shrug.

“JUST- JUST- UGH!” Darius turned and sprinted towards the hallway.

“Darius, watch-!”

The prince slammed into someone, hard, and sent them both rolling down the hall, until Darius landed directly on top of both them… and the cupcake box…

Venus, now covered in cake and whipped cream, wiped the gunk off their glasses and glared up at their step-brother. “Good evening to you too, bitch.”

“No, no no no no no no!” Darius pushed himself up st the floor and opened up the crushed cupcake box… it was absolutely obliterated. “DAAAAAAAGGGHHH!”

“What the hell’s your damage Darius?!” Venus snapped. The prince glared at them, then reached up quick as a flash and yanked them upwards by the front , slamming them against the wall.

“You idiot!” Darius shouted, ignoring the multitude of kicks that were getting levelled at his gut. “That was for my father!”

“How’s that my fault that you went and splattered the cupcake everywhere because you weren’t watching where you were going?!”

“I fear I may have let my pettiness blind me to what actually matters, how unbecoming of me…” Barbatos said as he gently pulled Darius off of Venus, allowing the half demon of Pride to drop back onto the safety of the ground. “My apologies, Lord Darius, but I recommend going to your father and explaining the situation rather than fighting with Venus.”

Darius glared up at Barbatos, then stomped off down the hall to do just that.

The door to Diavolo’s office was imposing as ever. Darius briefly wondered if this was what it was like for children who went to a normal school, he wondered if they ever felt this numbing nervousness when going to talk to the principal, or a teacher they desperately didn’t want to make angry…

That was all the life experience Darius had, really. Just wondering. Having his eyes glued to the television and wondering if that was what the real world was like…

Before Darius could even properly knock, the door swung open to reveal Diavolo, who looked just as startled as his son.

“Darius!” Diavolo reached forward to ruffle the boy’s hair, but stopped short when he noticed he was still covered in cupcake residue. “What… happened?”

“Cupcake… Father’s Day gift… I’m sorry…”

“What on earth are you sorry for?” Diavolo asked, kneeling down to Darius’ level as the boy hung his head in shame.

“I forgot about Father’s Day… and it was my first one here… with you… I messed up your present and spent all day running around like an idiot… I’m so so sorry, father…”

The moment the last words left Darius’ lips, he was crushed into a hug so quickly it nearly knocked the wind out of him.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for, I’m not angry, Darius, not even a little.” Diavolo pulled back, and gave Darius a winning smile. “The greatest gift you could possibly give me, is being here, and being my son.”

“Aw… father…” To his own horror, Darius felt himself get choked up.

“Are we just going to ignore that Diavolo basically quoted Mulan?”

Both Diavolo and Darius snapped their heads towards the source of the sound, where Venus, Lucifer, Tulsi, and Barbatos stood at the end of the hallway.

“Mulan? What’s that? I haven’t seen that.” Diavolo asked, tilting his head slightly.

“And,” Venus continued. “Are we just going to ignore that this is literally a repeat of what happened with me and my dad on a different Father’s Day?! The cupcake got smashed and everything!”

“Oh hush now, Venus.” Lucifer chided. “Don’t ruin the moment.”

Lucifer then looked expectantly at Darius, who raised an eyebrow.

“What? I don’t recall it being Stepfather’s Day.”

“Okay you little-”

“Why don’t you hush now too, Lucifer.” Barbatos offered.

“Yeah, listen to my dad.” Tulsi added with a sleepy smirk.

Diavolo abruptly stood up, his eyes flashing in that way they always did when he had a bright idea. “Why don’t we all watch that Mulan thing you all were talking about, hm? A lovely family activity to end off a family based day!”

“I’m always down for a movie.” Tulsi said with a shrug.

“Can we have popcorn?” Venus asked, already bouncing on their feet.

“I’ll find the movie.” Barbatos said, lightly beginning to brush past everyone, only for everyone’s actions to be halted by Lucifer clearing his throat.

“You know, I never did ask, but why are three of you covered in cake?”

••••••••••••••••••

Author’s note

…all hail the queen of procrastination.

That’s all I have to say.

#obey me #obey me! #obey me! shall we date? #obey me shall we date #obey me Lucifer #Obey me Mammon #Obey me Leviathan #Obey me Satan #Obey me Asmodeus #Obey me Beelzebub #Obey me Belphegor #Obey me Barbatos #Obey me Diavolo #Obey me Solomon #Obey me OC #Obey me fic #Obey me Fanfic #Obey me fanfiction #Obey me fankids #the brat brigade #obey me fankid

[strawberryfairi]

Tokyo Rev NSFW Headcanons 💖

The backshot kings:

Draken, Shuji, Keisuke, Taiju, Wakasa, Kakucho

The size kink brigade: Taiju, Kakucho, Shuji, Draken, South, Benkei, Hakkai

The tease masters:

Wakasa (so heavy with him), Ran, Sanzu, Izana, Mikey, Kazutora, Mitsuya, Hakkai (unintentionally)

The rough squad: Hard Doms

Shuji, Rindou (when he wants to be), Sanzu, Taiju (if you ask), Smiley, Izana, Keisuke (at times)

The ones that mastered how to make you squirt:

Draken, Ran, Shinichiro (unintentionally), Wakasa, Kazutora (unintentionally...or so he says), Kakucho, Taiju, Shuji, Koko, Hakkai (unintentionally)

The ones into that bondage sh*t:

Mitsuya, Izana, Koko, Shuji (I feel like he's up for most things really), Chifuyu (he'd let you do it to him too), Sanzu

The overstim addicts:

Shuji, Rindou, Sanzu, Kazutora, Wakasa, Mitsuya, Chifuyu, Ran

The ones that are always horny:

Kazutora, Shuji, Shinichiro, Chifuyu, Smiley

The ones that love to hear you beg:

Sanzu, Mikey, Keisuke, Ran, Draken, Mitsuya, Shuji, Wakasa, Kakucho, Izana, Shinichiro, South, Koko, Smiley, Rindou, Taiju, Benkei

The ones that are excellent with their tongues (and fingers):

Wakasa, Draken, Keisuke, Sanzu, Shuji, Mikey, Kazutora, Kakucho, Inui, Chifuyu, South, Koko, Shinichiro

The ones that like it soft and sweet:

Hakkai, Angry, Chifuyu (at times..he a freak on the low don't even play), Kazutora (most times)

The public/semi-public, thrill-seeker gang:

Shuji (I see this so heavy with him), Rindou, Wakasa, Sanzu (heavy for him too), Smiley, Shinichiro (he’d try it in his shop then realize how much he really loves it)

The ones that like to be called "Daddy":

Draken, Kakucho, Shuji, Benkei, South, Taiju

Car sex addicts:

Wakasa, Smiley, Ran, Sanzu, Draken, Shinichiro

Soft Doms:

Hakkai, Rindou, Inui, Kazutora, Wakasa, South, Benkei, Draken, Mikey, Mitsuya, Koko

The ones that love eye contact soooo heavy:

Ran, Taiju, Angry, Mitsuya, Izana, Rindou, Kazutora, Shuji, Wakasa, Draken, Hakkai, Keisuke, Shinichiro, Chifuyu, Smiley

The ones that love to brat tame:

Keisuke, Wakasa, Draken, Mikey, Ran, Kakucho, Taiju, Shuji, South, Mitsuya

The ones that love to grab and smack your ass any chance they get:

Shuji, Draken, Wakasa, Keisuke, Ran, Mitsuya, Kakucho, South, Shinichiro, Benkei

#Tokyo rev headcanons #smut headcanons #wakasa imaushi #shuji hanma smut #keisuke baji smut #shinichiro sano #draken smut #Hakkai shiba #smutty thoughts #wild thoughts #black fem reader #izana smut

[emo-batboy]

thoughts on battinson with his like seven kids and they have to suffer through everyone wanting to fuck him cause have you seen him??

Alright so this response kinda works in a competely separate realm of canon than what I usually post. I’m gonna preface that right now, but BOY do I have thoughts :D

So when I think of Battinson and his (non)accidental orphan acquisition, I see Battinson as being on a much more even playing field emotionally than most other iterations. He’s not really as stoic and put-together, so having kids (especially multiple) would cause a LOT more chaos and drama. So in this case, I like to think that it happens at a very rapid rate. (Again, I’m saying this because this require straying from the film’s canon to a much larger degree than I usually do.) SO by the time he’s 32, he has an 11yo Dick, a 9yo Jason, and an 8yo Tim. And they probably grow with him much like teen parents do with their kids. He’s not as authoritative as most parents. Instead, he starts out as like half older brother, half dad, then graduates to the roll of batdad after his whole vengeance era.

THAT ALL BEING SAID!! BECAUSE THEY’RE SO MUCH OLDER AND BRUCE IS YOUNGER, THEY DEAL WITH A LOOOOTTTTTT OF CREEPY LADIES TRYING GO GET WITH THEIR DAD. (AND THEY ARE VERY. SMART. FOR THEIR AGE)

Dick, older brother and the leader of the “Save Dad and Our Childhood Innocence” brigade teaches the three everything there is to know. He is the most experienced with these awful public events like galas and charity auctions, so he is in control.

And it is SO much easier to get the creepy suitors to back off when they work as a team

Dick talks everyone’s ears off. He’s the golden boy (getting perfect grades and gold medals in his school’s gymnastics team) so he EASILY gets away with distracting people

Dick will insert himself into adult conversations all the time, and Bruce always lets him, which allows Jason and Tim to wreak havoc on whatever target they chose.

Whenever it isn’t too obvious or it’s late enough in the night, Jason will fake a cold or a headache sometimes (he’s prone to falling sick) and Bruce will insist that he take his kid home and tuck him into bed himself, very fatherly

Tim uses his Youngest Child points to woo the nicer ones and direct them away from Bruce, but it doesn’t usually works on the gold diggers (and thank god because Tim HATES acting cute) so he’ll use it on Bruce instead

When those three plans don’t work, the three gremlins start getting Creative TM

Jason, taking a swig from some wine glass and proceeding to spray it all over Vicky Vale’s white dress: “This isn’t grape juice!”

Tim, resident iPad kid and (despite popular belief) The Most Evil of the Three, sees some lady touching his batdad so he finds her phone number on an online directory and prank calls her every time she gets too close

Suitor: “Your father is very handsome.” Dick: “My father’s dead :(” “…” “Oh wait, you mean Bruce! Yeah, he’s nice.”

One lady starts hanging off of Bruce, but he needs to run off to say hello to an investor. Jason appears from nowhere in his dapper little tux and the lady just says, “So uhh, you like the Wiggles, right?” Jason: “Nope! Have you ever read Crime and Punishment? :)”

Dick “accidentally” slaps some obnoxious guests with his wild hand gestures “Oh no! I’m so sorry :(( Let me get you an ice pack” and pulls them away while the other two hide their laughter

One of the ladies who is WAY too comfortable and forward when flirting with Bruce is forced to sit down with Tim and he goes in head first “what are you doing with my dad?” “oh you know what adults do, honey. Messing around, having fun” and he’s like “well My dad doesn’t look interested” “of course he is! who knows? Maybe we’ll hit it off and make another one of you one day” which gives Tim intense psychic damage, but he’s a horrible little brat so he doesn’t give up. He hits her with the innocent doe eyes and asks in the cutest fucking voice “Where do babies come from?” she BOOKS IT (they never see her again)

Anyway, to answer your question: they are little terrors. and Bruce knows they’re little terrors, but he doesn’t care because he hates the creepy attention even more than they do, but this way it comes with a show :D

#battinson #bruce wayne #batman #the batman 2022 #the batman #batman 2022 #batdad #batfamily #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #dc universe #you get ‘em kids

[poke-me-with-a-stick]

Chapter 26 of 'Artificial Wingman!'

For the full story on Ao3, click Here!

Enjoy!

---

Danny hissed as the wire he was soldering zapped him. His fingers healed almost immediately, just the lightest pink any indication that he had been hurt, but the electricity flowed up his arm, making his litchenberg ache. He rubbed his arm before tuning it out, turning back to the gun with an annoyed grumble.

Seconds later the same thing happened again, making the halfa hiss again. His core stuttered at the feeling, making an uneasy warbling sound as the current spread slightly further up his arm. The teen brought his fingers to his mouth, blowing cool air on the tingling appendages. Once they were sufficiently numb, he went back to work.

The wire he was soldering buzzed threateningly as he melded it to it's proper circuit. Finally, the darned thing stopped, it's excess electricity funneling into the board. New wires lit up, popping small sparks as energy flowed through. One such wire right under Danny's wrist, hitting directly on the edge of his death scar.

The teen couldn't stop himself from jerking away with a loud yelp, practically falling out of his seat as he cursed under his breath. "Fuck!" He muttered, rubbing his wrist. His arm tensed and twitched as he tried to massage the pain from it, fingers spasming as his scar buzzed. It took a few minutes for the feeling to pass, and a few longer to flex the soreness out of his fingers. When he could comfortably make a fist again, he turned and leveled a glare at the damned scientific abomination.

His glare faltered after a second, his shoulders drooping in exhausted defeat. "Why couldn't Mom and Dad have been, like, dentists or something?" He questioned quietly. Danny would rather have lectures on proper dental hygiene than have to deal with this. Sighing, he sat back down and pulled the gun towards him again. 'Better just to get it fixed.'

From across the room, Robin stood up from where he had been leaning against the wall. The teen stalk across the space separating them, coming to a stop just in front of Danny. The halfa took his eyes off of his work to look up at him, being careful to rest his hands decidedly away from the live wires. ". . .You good?" Danny asked after a minute of nothing but Robin's intense, searching stare.

Robin stayed silent, giving Danny no warning as he carefully pushed the gun away. Before Danny could ask what he was doing, the teen grabbed his wrist and pulled him up, all but dragging him from the room. It was Danny's turn to be quiet, though his silence was more because of shock and less because of... whatever was up with Robin.

Danny decides that it's too much trouble to try and form a coherent question. Instead, he just lets Robin lead him down the hall, turning and coming to a stop at a closed door. Robin knocks, then takes a step back and waits. Jason opens the door moments later, leaning against the frame as his eyes rake over the two of them.

"What's up, brat?" He asks, his gaze meeting Danny's over Robin's shoulder, conveying a silent question of 'What's this about?'. In response, the teen shrugs, sending back an 'I have no clue,' look. Jason rolls his eyes slightly before focusing his attention back on Robin. "Did you need something?"

"Danny needs to take a break." Robin states bluntly. Danny lets out a protesting "Hey!", but is ignored by the brothers in front of him. "I merely intended to let you know that we are going out. So that you do not worry needlessly about us being gone." With his piece said, Robin began to turn away.

"Hold it, Hell spawn." Jason stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. "You just gonna run around in your suit?" When Robin didn't immediately respond, the man shook his head. "Come on, demon brat. I'll give you a change of clothes. It's a miracle that the bat brigade hasn't already tracked us down yet." He dipped back into the room, leaving the door open as he searched around for something for Robin to wear. "Speakin' of which, did you turn off all the trackers in your suit or something?"

"No, I haven't touched any of the trackers." Robin told him through the door. He tugged Danny closer, his thumb feathering over the pulse point of his wrist. Danny let out a sigh at the action, the rhythmic motions chasing the last bit of pain away. "In fact, I had a rather odd experience with my comms earlier this week. They were filled with static when I attempted to use them to contact Oracle. When I was unable to get through to her, I had to retrieve one of the spares from the safe-house." Jason hummed as he returned, clothes in hand.

"You think the same might have happened to your tracker?" He asked as he handed the clothes over. Robin had to drop Danny's hand to take them, and Danny tried not to pay attention to the sad whirring noise his core made in response.

Instead, he turned his attention back to the conversation. "Oh, that? It was probably me." He admitted a bit sheepishly. They both stopped and turned to look at him. When they didn't say anything, he began to ramble. "So, uh. It's kinda a ghost thing? Ecto beings and extremely contaminated liminals tend to radiate ecotplasm, which messes with electronics and, well, technology in general. So, it might be my fault that some things aren't working right?" He let out a nervous laugh, his hand coming up to massage the back of his neck.

Robin was the first to break the silence. "That does make sense." He admitted. "It would explain why we had such a difficult time tracking the Joker's location when you were taken, and why your sister had such an easy time of it finding you when she gave it a try." Behind him, Jason gave a nod, accepting the explanation given, before letting out a laugh.

"Ah, no one in this family ever dates a normal person, do they?" He snorts again before stepping out into the hall and letting Robin into the room.

"Hey!" Danny groaned in fake indignation. "You already knew that I was Spook-tacularly abnormal before this!" Both brothers froze for a minute before groaning themselves at his amazing (horrible) pun.

Reaching out, Jason plants a heavy hand on Danny's head to violently ruffle his already messy hair, electing a yelp from the teen. He laughed as Danny swatted his hand away, pushing the teen slightly so that he stumbled back a step. "We need to keep you and Dick-face as far apart as possible. If you two meet, we're all doomed."

Danny opened his mouth to retort, planning on saying something about this Dick guy having great taste in wit, but was cut off as Robin swung the door open again and stepped out. Turning, he gave the teen's new outfit a look. An old band tee that was slightly too big, a pair of worn jeans that bunched slightly around his calves, a pair of sneakers, and the sunglasses that Danny had gotten for him. All in all, it fits perfectly with the 'average teenager' theme that they're going for.

"Where did you get the sunglasses?" Jason asked, looking the teen over as well. Robin didn't respond to him, instead grabbing Danny's wrist again and leading him to the stairwell. "Be safe you two!" He called after them, "I'm serious! If you get into any trouble, bat related or otherwise, give me a damn call!" Danny glanced back at Jason as he was pulled along, waving at the man as he rounded the corner. The teen couldn't help but smirk at the exasperated look on the man's face as they disappeared from view.

Danny didn't speak as Robin led him down the stairs and through the parking garage. He was content to follow the teen as they continued on, coming out of a maintenance tunnel and stepping into the street. Weak sunlight broke through the ever-present smog, warming the two of them as they walked. It was only when they were about half a mile into this walk that Danny finally broke the silence.

"So, where are we headed?" He asked. Robin stopped abruptly at his question, causing him to bump into the teen's back. "Oof- Robin? Hey, what's-" Danny looked around for what could have made the teen freeze, until something gave him a pause. He looked back at the teen, who was now staring pensively at the ground. A bashful yet thoughtful look on his face. "Oh, I know that look." Of course he knew that look. It was the one Jazz, Sam, Tucker and Dani always described when he did something impulsively. "You didn't plan that far ahead, did you?"

When Robin didn't respond right away, Danny couldn't help but to chuckle. "Glad I'm not the only one who makes split-second decisions." He jokes, smiling at the teen. His smile slowly falls when all Robin does is flinch and frown. "Hey," Danny starts, his playful tone dropping into something more gentle. "It's fine, Robin. I wouldn't mind just wandering around for a few hours." He felt a blush threaten his face as he let a small, mischievous smile tug at his lips. "Especially when I'm wandering around with such amazing company as you."

The cheesy line did the trick, just as Danny was hoping it would. Robin's frown evened out, his expression going back to that look of resting apathy that it usually was, but Danny had spent the past week with him. He could see the slight blush, the way the corners of his lips twitched ever so slightly. He didn't say anything, but Danny could tell that he was pleased, at the very least.

They started walking again, though at a more sedate pace than before. They passed stores, apartments, small vendors, not stopping once but enjoying the calm atmosphere of the city during mid-day. The pair kept away from any alleyway's, though. Just because the city seemed peaceful out in the open, that didn't mean that there weren't crooks and robbers hiding out in the shadow-y, secluded places.

Sometime during their stroll, Robin had loosened his grip on Danny's wrist, his hand trailing down the halfa's arm until their palms were touching. This time, Danny didn't ignore the way his core buzzed and purred at the contact, instead basking in the warm feeling it sent resonating through his chest when their fingers intertwined.

Eventually the two had to come to a stop, their stomachs demanding they find somewhere to eat. The solution to that problem was relatively easy, as they only had to backtrack a little bit to find someplace decent. A Bat Burger seemed to be calling them from across the street, the smell of fast food wafting from the door as it swung closed behind a couple.

Ordering and settling at a booth was a relatively simple affair, and soon they were sitting across from each other once again. Neither of them spoke, neither of them really needed to. Both of them were just relaxed, reveling in each other's presences. They hadn't really left each other's sides since the love potion took effect, excluding certain pesky clowns of course, but something about this time was different than all the time they had spent together before. 'It might be that I'm finally not ignoring everything I feel now,' Danny thought, a smile crossing his face again as he stared at Robing from the corner of his eye.

"Thank you." He said it quietly, but Robin heard him nonetheless.

"For what?" Robin asked, his head tilting to the side.

'Cute,' Danny couldn't help the thought. "For pulling me out of my own head. I can kinda take after my parents when it comes to projects. Especially important ones. My friends and Jazz usually have a hard time convincing me to take a break, so it's kinda nice to have someone not afraid to yank me out by my foot." He chuckles, his hand raising to rub his neck again.

Robin catches it before it makes contact. Bringing it across the table, he places a gentle kiss on the knuckles before setting their interlaced hands down on the tabletop. Danny fights his blush as Robin smirks at him. "You'll find that I am more than capable of interrupting, should it be necessary for you to take a break." Quieter, he mumbled "I's not like I haven't had plenty of practice with Drake and his horrible habits."

Danny perked up, his blush fading as he focused on something else. "Who's Drake?" He asked.

Robin froze for only a second before responding. "Drake is one of my adopted brothers." He admits. "He has the same habit of delving deep into a topic and completely forgetting about the world around him. It takes the whole family to keep him from dying of his own ignorance to his body's demands." The irritation in his tone is tempered by a small amount of fondness, and Danny can't help but to smile knowingly at him.

"Is he really that bad?"

"Yes. Out of all of my siblings, the most self-care rules have been put in place because of Drake. Not that they're followed half the time, but the evidence does speak for itself." He huffed, letting his chin lower to rest on his arm. "If not for our family, Drake would have long since worked himself into the grave."

Danny smirked, sitting up straighter. "You just made a pun!" He accused, his smirk widening into a smile at the look that crossed the other teen's face.

"I did no such thing." He denied, sitting up as well.

"You so did!" Danny giggled, rubbing his thumb across Robin's knuckle. "Don't worry, I won't tell." He winked at Robin, before looking away. "But, back to your brother. That sounds tough."

Robin sighed, but let it go. "Yes, forcing Drake to take proper care of himself can be a very demanding job at times. But, sadly, he's family. And as such, it is my 'moral' obligation to make sure he doesn't perish."

"Yikes. That sounds like a soul-sucking job." Danny tried to tease.

It fell flat when Robin looked him dead in the eye and nodded. "That statement is more true that any of my family would care to admit." Danny choked, his mind wildly trying to think of how to backtrack. Then Robin cracked a small smile, a light and airy laugh leaving him, and Danny knew he had been played.

"Your evil," He grumbles half-heartedly at the vigilante, fighting back a small smirk of his own.

"Trust me," Robin's smile turned slightly devious. "I can be a Lot worse."

Their order was called before Danny could even try to snark back, 'Flirt back? Was Robin flirting with him?', and Robin disentangled his hand from Danny's quickly, hurrying off to get their food before Danny could protest. Leaving said teen to deal with the blush that now encompassed his entire face.

By the time the teen made it back with their food, Danny had managed to wrestle his blush from a full cherry red to a warm pink. Thankfully, Robin didn't mention it, instead just pushing Danny's meal towards him and digging into his own. Danny followed in suite, pulling the wrapper from his burger taking a bite.

They two teens ate in silence, content with the cozy, comfortable atmosphere that surrounded them. But they were only half-way through their meal when the quiet was broken, but not by either of them. A hand slammed down on the table between them, startling both teens. Pausing mid-bite, Danny turned and looked at the hand, before following it up to it's owner's face. Unsurprisingly, it was someone Danny didn't recognize. But a quick glance at Robin made Danny certain that he knew who this was.

"What are you doing here?" The teen growled. 'Yep,' Danny looked between the two, growing wary at how tense Robin had become as he glared at the... Man? He looked a bit young, but he wasn't exactly a teenager, either. Danny was gonna go with guy, then. 'He definitely knows him.'

"What am I doing here? What are you doing here? Why haven't you come home in the past week, or checked in with us at all? Do you know how stressed everyone has been, searching for you?" The guy crossed his arms, glaring down at Robin with that 'Your doing something stupid and annoying' look. Honestly, it was kinda eerie to see that look on someone besides a teacher. "You need to come home, and at least explain what the hell is going on with you."

Robin didn't respond, which seemed to annoy the guy. He groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance. "Seriously?" He asked, one hand falling to rest on his hip. "You're just going to ignore me?" Danny glanced at Robin from the corner of his eye and, sure enough, the teen was staring resolutely at the table as he munched on a fry. By all accounts, it seemed like the teen was ignoring the dude.

Danny knew it was an act when Robin caught his eye, tilting his head ever so slightly down. Danny followed, looking down at his hand. The vigilante lifted three fingers briefly, before letting his hand rest on the table, all his fingers flattening out except for one, which he scrunched up almost like he was pointing. But why was he pointing at the table? Was he pointing at the table? Or maybe...

A small tap, so quiet that for a moment Danny thought that he had imagined it. A few seconds later, another tap. It was only when he heard the third tap that he put it all together. Thinking fast, Danny ducked under the table just as Robin surged up from his seat, is fist making contact with the guy's solar plexus with a meaty thump. Danny couldn't help but wince in sympathy as the dude dropped to the floor with a wheezy gasp, but he didn't bother to check on the guy either. Instead, he slid out from under the table, snagging his burger as Robin grabbed his wrist. In seconds they were out the door and across the street, sprinting around the corner.

From behind them, Danny could hear the man stumble out of the Bat Burger, calling after them. "Wait! Damn it, come back!" He yelled. Danny was forced to bring his attention away from the man as Robin took a hard left. The teen yelped as he was pulled into the alleyway and behind a dumpster. His nose wrinkled at the awful smell, but before he could complain, Robin slapped a hand across his mouth. Danny glared grumpily at the teen, but Robin merely pointed towards the mouth of the alley.

Danny watched as the man ran past them, a strange sort of pride bubbling in his core when he heard the wheezy breaths of the dude ass he passed them. Secretly, he wondered if he could get Robin to use that move on him, one day. Immediately, Danny shook the thought from his head. 'This is no time for those kinds of thoughts,' he told himself.

Both of them stayed crouched down there for a bit, just until they were sure that the guy wasn't coming back. Only when the guy's footsteps had faded from Danny's enhanced hearing, did they deem it safe to venture back out. The halfa couldn't stop his sigh of relief to be away from the trash, taking a deep breath to clear his nose.

The walk back to the parking garage was just as quiet as before, but defiantly more tense. Robin kept to side streets, ducking away from lights and sidewalks that seemed crowded. Honestly, after the last time they were out and about, Danny couldn't really blame him for that one. It took way longer to get back, But Danny didn't complain.

In turn Robin didn't protest the way Danny kept close to him, practically back to chest. Occasionally, their shoulders would bump, or their arms would brush, and it took every bit of self-control he had not to grab Robin's hand. Not that the teen would have minded, with the state he was in, but Danny knew this wasn't the right time for that kind of thing. Not when they were trying to get back without being followed, and defiantly not when he was still trying to sort through his own feelings himself.

By the time they made it back, the sun was casting it's last rays on the city's clouded horizon, turning them various shades of purple and red. Once back at the top of the stairwell, Robin split from him, probably to tell Jaosn about what had happened. Danny stood there for a moment, before heading towards the living room. Settling back down, he gazed at the portal gun's tangled wires with a fresh set of eyes.

His gaze flittered over the circuits and plating, freezing on something he hadn't noticed before. There, hidden by a mass of tangled cables, was a little button. An OFF button. Groaning, he slapped his forehead before reaching out and pressing it. With a click and a beep, the wires made one last spluttering spark before falling dormant. "Of course," he scoffed, half bitter and half exasperated. "Why do my parents have the bad habit of putting an off switch in the worst possible place?" He asked the space around him. Only the silence answered him back.

Shaking himself, Danny sighed and focused on the now safe wires, getting back to work. Now that they weren't zapping him every five seconds, he might actually be able to make better progress with it.

- - -

Tim hissed as he shifted the ice pack on his chest, his breath wheezing just slightly. He had been expecting to deflect a knife, or some sort of thrown projectile. He had been braced and prepared for it, too. He hadn't expected the brat to actually punch him. And, like a complete newbie, he had left his torso unguarded.

He was glad that he was alone in the cave for the moment. Dick was back in Buldehaven, negotiating for time off so that he could better lend a hand, both in searching for Damian and covering for him while the kid was still AWOL. Duke was out dealing with the last of Joker's goons wandering around, Jason was back to ignoring all messages that were left for him, so either he had found something and wasn't in the sharing mood, or he was just being his usual, non-helpful self. Bruce had been called away to deal with a League matter, however reluctant he was to go, and was set to get back just before patrol. And Steph was upstairs with Cass, doing 'Girl Stuff' that they refused to talk about.

Part of Tim wondered if Girl Stuff included whatever Cass and Alfred had been working on. He was incredibly curious about what she and Alfred were up to in there, but had left it alone, more focused on their current predicament. He could investigate Cass's... whatever is in there, later.

Readjusting the ice pack again, Tim pulled away from his thoughts and looked over the security footage that Oracle had sent over again. The video played, just a corner of a busy Gotham street, but then it glitched slightly. Static overlays the clip for a few seconds, before clearing up again, revealing two figures on the opposite side of the street. One was obviously Damian, wearing clothes slightly too big for him, and the other was a teenager. Around the same age as the missing vigilante, and just shorter by an inch or two, there was no mistaking the fact that they were walking together. Tucked close to each other's sides, heads tilted close and holding hands, the two looked like a couple. It had been such an unexpected thing that Tim had questioned if Babs had sent him the right clip. But there was no denying that it was Damian in the video. So the question remained, who was the other guy?

When Tim had first received the video, he had posed that same question to Babs. Both Dick and Duke had seen him before, when they had confronted Damian at the mall, but there was no other real record of him. Running face recognition of the fuzzy, distorted images had brought up nothing, not even a slight match. It was almost if the teen didn't exist, which was not all that astounding in their line of work, but usually meant a lot of trouble.

Sighing, Tim leaned back in his chair, letting the video loop again. 'Just who are you, mysterious Snow-White?', he asked himself, rubbing his eyes. Groaning, he stretched as much as he was able with his new bruise before standing, shaking out the purposefully baggy shirt he had slid on to keep the ice from melting on it. He was trying his best to keep his new injury on the down-low, at least until he could figure out how to explain how their usually predictable, unpredictable wildcard of a little brother got the drop on him in the most unpredictable way possible.

Was it kind of hopeless to hope that Alfred wouldn't notice the odd attire? Yes. Did that mean the teen wasn't going to try at all? No, no it didn't. If Tim had his timing right, he might be able to slip right on up to his room, with no one any the wiser about his current physical condition. And with the abnormal amount of sleep he had been getting for the past few days, it probably wouldn't raise any alarms if he didn't come back out for a while.

Of course, Tim's perfect plan was shattered almost the minute he stepped out of the elevator, to find none other than Alfred himself re-arranging a stack of papers on Bruce's desk. The butler looked to him as he stepped out into the office, his sharp gaze raking over Tim with an intensity most hero's, and maybe even some villains, wish they had. The teen fought the urge to squirm under the man's gaze, and almost drooped alarmingly the minute he looked away.

Hope flared in Tim's chest when Alfred didn't immediately scold him with some witty quip, but it's embers were extinguished just as fast as they appeared when the man simply gestured to the chairs in front of the desk. Cursing mentally, he took a seat, careful of his now aching ribs.

"I would like to assume that you were not attempting to hide an injury from me, were you Master Timothy?" The butler asked, his tone not giving anything away.

Tim shook his head mutely, keeping his gaze fixed on the Superman paper weight they had gotten Bruce for Christmas one year.

"Good. Then I suppose you will have no trouble pulling up your shirt and letting me treat it properly, then?" Tim knew it wasn't a request, complying immediately. The butler let out a "Tsk," before getting to work, poking and probing the afflicted area to make sure nothing was broken before applying a layer of bandaged, then the ice pack, and one last layer of bandages. The cold was now pressed firmly against the bruise, dulling the ache with the cold that it radiated. Tim couldn't really help the sigh of relief that escaped him as the pain eased up.

"Thanks, Alfred." Tim sighed, leaning back in the comfortable chair for a minute before standing again.

"It was no problem, Master Timothy. But please, if you injure yourself, get it treated properly. A poorly placed bandaid will do a broken bone no good." With that, the man turned back to the desk, wiping some dust off one corner.Shaking his head, Tim sighed and left the room, headed for the kitchen. Despite all the sleep he had gotten, and the excess energy now in him, he really just wanted a cup of coffee.

---

(I know that there are some spelling/grammar mistakes, but it's okay because I tried my best!)

For the amazing person who made the prompt for this story, as well as all the lovely people who follow along!

@halfblackwolfdemon @manapeer @xxwintrynightzxx @im-totally-not-an-alien-2 @blu-lilac @academicpurposes @secretdestinywerewolf @passivedecept @naluforever3 @postit-nope @spiteismymiddlename @2t-productions @plague-daisy @feet-achy @bubblecookies16 @thesapphiredragon13 @justwannabecat @magicalcollecter @adeniumdream @amuseofminds @lupagrim @readerkayden @dr-syko-pharm-4 @ladythugs @angelheartgamer @markthespot68 @kyrianclawraith @michikoy-yuki @servasvictoria02 @your-emo-nightmare @vala-dreams @scarlett-green-rose @t1dwarrior-of-earth @charlie-the-frogie @akikoyuii @mysticalcomputerdetective @roseuniverse999 @im-totally-not-an-alien @thefearfullone @weird-droplet-309 @jaytriesstuff @raventao @jacquelynwinchester @dragongoblet @tlise21 @longlivethefallen @the-archer-goddess @temple-of-jalebi @adepresseddwightsblogofjunk @plainly-colorful @the-legalHe-shipper @49saltpeppershakers @igotafewbadideas @tumbling-darkling @sparklygardenbouquet @sarcastic-yami @blueneko9314 @starscreamlover @liedboutmurder @do3y @roze-realm @some-mildly-happy-human @yinari-uchiha @azuera @chaoticmistake @altairsarts @kawaiikenna @heartsong18 @thetoyboxs @tricksovertreats @mnemovoid @lim4b3ans @horribly-lost-and-gay @keimiwolf @dryeraseslime @joey394

#dc x dp #danny phantom x dc #batman x danny phantom #dead serious #danny phantom x batfam #danny phantom x damian wayne #love potion #miscommunication #dpxdc #dcxdp #long post #fic on ao3

[songmingisthighs]

[8.07] dad!mingi × baby!sumin × baby!seeun (ft. uncles!ateez, dad!hongjoong and baby!minjae)

⇀ mingi really is that dad. an enabler dad.

⇁ i ended up writing this after mulling over it for a long ass while (not really but still, long enough) and at this point brat brigade's spam section is my baby!xikers dumping ground. but lookie @flowerboykun i wrote this idea !

⇁ disclaimer : the author is not forcing any ideas or form of relationship between irl characters. this fic is specifically for entertainment purposes

wc : 1.8 k

genre : fluff, dad!au, baby!au

When you first found out that you were pregnant, your first thought went straight to how much fun you'll have dressing your daughter up. Then you found out you were having a boy and Mingi immediately cried because now he can have his twin. Then the second time you got pregnant, you were still hoping to have a girl to dress in frilly clothes and shove the fact that now you have your own twin to Mingi's face. But that day, in the doctor's office, with Mingi and Sumin with his custom baby Gucci beret in his arms, you found out that you were having another boy. It wasn't like you don't want your children, it was just that you know having two boys means that Mingi's going to have so much fun coordinating both boys' outfits.

So now, when Sumin and Seeun reached 5 and 4 years old respectively, you weren't even surprised that Mingi had dedicated a whole Instagram page to document the daily outfits that he coordinated for them. As pissy as you were that you couldn't dress your daughter in pink tutus or sparkly tops, you have to admit that they looked absolutely precious in the outfit their dad had so passionately picked for them.

Sumin is almost always dressed in how Mingi would be dressed on stage, a muted version of his flashy fashion while Seeun is more often than not dressed as a sporty-casual Mingi. They have their own unique styles, of course, but Mingi would always make sure that whenever they go out, people will IMMEDIATELY recognize them as siblings. And now, he had (somehow) managed to rope you into coordinating outfits as a family which you (and Seonghwa as the eldest representative) had limited to special events only because people (Wooyoung) began teasing you both by using the pictures you posted on Instagram and photoshopping them on advertisements (the worst one was for a hemorrhoid cream) which annoyed you (you taking his old as fuck Bathing Ape jacket and threatening to rip it to shreds and use them to wipe your children's snots). Nevertheless, both brothers love being dressed up by their dads so much and you were absolutely grateful for the fact that they never fought over who gets to wear what when, it had always been civil between them and they even do this bit of commenting on each other's outfits just before they go out. It's safe to say that at ages 5 and 4, they can differentiate between Houndstooth and Glen Check, and which is Louis Vuitton and which is Gucci. Yeah, your babies are SPOILED by their dad.

Their taste develops at such a young age that nowadays, they have begun to accessorise themselves. Sumin has been quite into sunglasses lately, even at night, he'd try to wear his dad's sunglasses on top of his head that just ended up falling over his face so Mingi bought him his first Gentle Monster that he adored to pieces. Seeun, on the other hand, has been into hats as of late, particularly bucket hats. It started when you put one on him as he was going to the mall to have fun with his uncle Yunho and cousin Jinsik, and he came home buzzing with excitement and refusing to take his hat off, so he asked you and Mingi to take him to get more hats the next day (he took mostly buckets, of course).

Knowing how important impressions are to your boys, you were rather reluctant to leave them for their first day of pre-K and kindergarten because you were called to the newly established branch of your company in Gyeongsangnam-do. While Seeun cried freely into your chest, Sumin tried to pack himself into your luggage. Thankfully, you were able to compromise with the boys by letting them wear whatever they want for their first day in a new environment and that they would be able to send you pictures and videos as much as they wanted. You thought that there would be no harm done and Mingi would make sure that both boys can freely express themselves within the guidelines. With teary eyes and quivering lips, both boys spent a whole 15 minutes hugging you until you have to go.

So the next day, Mingi arrived with his boys in front of the school and as soon as they got out of the car, Seeun and Sumin rushed to the steps and posed, beyond excited. "Come on, dad! Take a picture!" Sumin called out as he adjusted Seeun's hat so the front flap doesn't cover his eyes. "Coming!" Mingi grinned widely and immediately crouched down a little bit farther away from the two boys with his phone aimed at them, "Now, give mommy a big, big smile and a big pose!"

Clad in blue and white, both boys were grinning widely, very much happy with the outfit that they were adorning. Keeping with the twinning theme, Sumin had a white long-sleeved shirt paired with knee-length light blue shorts, colourful crew socks that he picked out himself, and original white Adidas with black stripes. To top the look off, he had his sunglasses on top of his head as a fashion statement. Meanwhile, Seeun was wearing a white t-shirt with a light blue puffer vest, matching knee-length shorts and matching bucket hat, crew socks, and original black vans. To top it all off, both boys were wearing different black bags; Sumin with his messenger bag and Seeun with his backpack. Parents walking past them genuinely thought that the boys were celebrity children which was technically true since their dad is an idol but they themselves also seemed like tv personalities with how confident they were in front of the camera and they were dressed too fashionably for a day in school.

When Sumin and Seeun had their fill of posing and taking pictures, Mingi shot you a quick text with a picture of your boys before jogging to his boys who grabbed his hands upon contact. "Okay, it's a big big day for Seeunnie here, so please listen to your teacher for everything. That goes to you too, Sumin, Okay?" Mingi eyed the two boys who were staring up at him intently, "I can't have mommy getting a call saying that you stuck a crayon up your nose again like your first day in Pre-K," Mingi squinted his eyes at the eldest boy who whined and stomped his feet in embarrassment at the mention of his accident while his younger brother snorted at him. Some parents were rushing to get their kids in but the Song boys were enjoying their leisure walk as the family head told them how to conduct themselves. Seeun was looking up at his dad, listening carefully while Sumin was kicking pebbles along the path whilst maintaining hand-holding with Mingi.

Just as the boys were about to reach the entrance of the school, a teacher came approaching with a smile on her face. "Why hello there!" she greeted as she crouched down in front of the boys which made Sumin's smile drop and Seeun stepped back and hid behind one of Mingi's legs, "I see that you two are ready for school, huh? Look at your clothes!" The compliments she was giving made Sumin puff up his chest proudly as Seeun took half a step forward to look at the teacher curiously. "I love your outfits so much, however, we don't allow accessories like hats and sunglasses in our classes," the teacher's eyes peered up to Mingi as if seeking his help to remove the items from his kids and hopefully take him home with him.

Hearing that they couldn't wear their accessories, Sumin and Seeun whipped their heads to Mingi with the saddest face ever. Mingi, however, didn't even need the push from his sons to step up for them. "Why not?" he asked without sparing a second. The teacher seemed taken aback, not expecting that a parent would question the rules that have been established for a long time in the school. "Because... It's an accessory sir, it's not part of the outfit guidelines for the students," if she thought that would just drop it, she was sorely mistaken. Mingi looked around at the other kids that were starting to arrive and noticed some little girls with accessories on them which he pointed at with his chin, "I don't think I read anything about bead bracelets, necklaces, and earrings," he shrugged. To anyone who didn't know him, it might seem like Mingi was being annoying or unreasonable but in reality, Mingi was simply being inquisitive. The teacher seemed stunned because he did have a point but at the same time, no one has ever raised an issue or even just a question about female students wearing accessories before. "Uh... I mean..." Truly, she was stumped but she had to answer because she was supposed to have an answer, "W-well, the accessories the boys wear could be dangerous as things like your son's sunglasses could poke other children in the eyes and no one is allowed to wear hats in class." Hearing their accessories being mentioned, both children grabbed the items mentioned as if to not let anyone take them away. "Yeah, but... Why? I don't see any problem if my boys are not gonna distract any children with their accessories or disturb the class. If anything, those glass ball thingies in those girls' hair ties could potentially blind other children if they snapped or the necklaces they wore could break, fall into a student's drinking cup and choke on it."

Just as the teacher was about to answer, two people came and stopped where they stood still. She didn't know whether it was a good or a bad thing, though. "What are you guys doing here?" Hongjoong asked with an eyebrow raised, Minjae on his side on his iPad with his headphones on. Both Sumin and Seeun immediately beamed and rushed to hug their uncle Joongie tightly, greeting him with muffled voices. "The teacher said Sumin can't wear his sunglasses and Seeun can't wear his bucket hat," Mingi sighed, shrugging his shoulders in confusion. Hongjoong furrowed his eyebrows and planted his hands on his hips, "What do you mean they can't wear their sunglasses and bucket hat?" The teacher was about to answer when Mingi answered for her instead, "Well she said those items could hurt other children?" To which Hongjoong replied with a scoff and his arms crossed over his chest, "And those tiny catapults in the girls' hair couldn't?" In agreement, Mingi clapped his hands together, "Thank you!"

It seemed like both fathers were so into their conversations that they didn't realize the kids were looking at each other. Minjae pulled his headphone down and tucked his iPad into his bag securely before taking both of Sumin and Seeun's hands into his. He stepped up to the dumbfounded teacher (who looked like she was about to cry) and spoke, "We'll be getting to class first, miss, we'll be late," he smiled widely before bowing and walking away with Sumin and Seeun in tow, not even giving a chance for the teacher to tell him that he was not supposed to bring electronics into class and that Sumin and Seeun were still not supposed to wear their accessories.

This issue could be resolved, right?

taglist :

@yvnnieurl @kodzukein @phenomenalgirl9 @skzatzloveismonsterous @memorymonster @thesolarplanetarysystem @dreamlesswonder86 @maddiebabyxoxo @imababywolf @do-you-actually-care @marievllr-abg @ilsedingsx @wasteitonserendipity @bbymatz @noonaishere @honeyhwaaa @ateezourstars @yoonjunshi @yoongiigolden @camillelafaye @charreddonuts @jcngh0-hq @kpopnightingale @starryunho @atinct @mirror-juliet @hyuckilstan @jayb17 @kpoplover718 @imswitchbabemox @haatohwa @youngestdelacour @x-bluee @erinaimeexx @blackb3ll @mingiholic @angelicyeo @vampcharxter @meowmeowminnie @marvelous-llama @kawennote09 @hongjoong-lovebot @ming-ki @stopeatread @spooo00oky @asjkdk @shinotani

network :

@cultofdionysusnet @kflixnet

#cultofdionysusnet #kflixnet #ateez #ateez scenario #ateez scenarios #ateez imagine #ateez imagines #ateez timestamps #ateez timestamp #ateez fanfic #ateez au #dad!au #xikers #xikers scenarios #xikers imagines #xikers fanfic #xikers timestamp #xikers au #mingi #sumin #seeun #mingi scenarios #mingi imagines #mingi au #sumin scenarios #seeun scenarios #dad!mingi #smt scenarios #smt imagines #smt timestamp

[wonderful-little-hoebag]

[What type of parents they’d be]

Robin: Oh honey. Trying their best SO hard. Knows they can’t afford to give them the things other parents can and it makes them insecure.

Kylar: Forget helicopter parent, they’re a whole damn military brigade tracking their kid wherever they go. They’re so overprotective they’re damn near tempted to wrap their kid in bubble wrap.

Whitney: ohhhh bad parent. bad bad bad parent. Acts more like an older sibling tbh. Let’s their brat get away with EVERYTHING

Avery: WORST PARENT. Wants the picture perfect family, will have a fucking stroke if their kid so much as gets a D on a test.

Sydney: Wants the picture perfect family, actually has the picture perfect family. So so SO HAPPY. Always worried though, they’re constantly asking Sirris for advice. Yeah no Sirris is going to be the one giving them the ‘talk’

#degrees of lewdity #dol #kylar the loner #whitney the bully #sydney the faithful #robin the orphan #avery the businessperson

[yaekiss]

Dehya, the type of brat to act all tough and strong around you and her brigade but not even 5 minutes later, is straddling your lap, arms around your neck while kissing your cheek all over while being all whiny and needy not a care in the world as she grinds her aching cunt against your thigh or that her brigade can see and hear what she's saying but don't bring it up since she can and has beaten up anyone who's brought up your relationship with her

Dehya: Can we go home now~ I need you in me so bad~

Y/n: In a bit, baby, just have to look over these battle plans for next week's raid

Dehya hates it when she has to wait. She's your girlfriend, so by default, she should have all your attention, not some stupid documents so it doesn't occur to her what kind of consequences she'll get once she slaps your important papers from your hand and onto the floor

Y/n:........dehya, bend down and pick those up.....now

Dehya: giggles, that's not happening, buuuut~ if you take me home we can Ah~

Dehya didn't even get to finish what she was "demanding" before your fingers found themselves stuffed in her cunt while your thumb presses against her clit

Y/n: You've been such a good girl this week~ why ruin it now~

Dehya doesn't answer as she whimpers and starts grinding her fingers on your hips while clenching her pussy around them as she lays her head in the crook of your neck and moan like a pathetic whore but her moans are cut short as you remove her fingers from her cunt and grab her face

Y/n: when I ask you a question you answer it....understand me~

Dehya: Yes daddy~ starts sucking on your fingers while grinding her pussy against the growing erection in your pants I'm sorry for being a bad girl but I want you to ruin me so bad~

Y/n: and you think being a bad girl will get me to do that~

Dehya: oh but daddy~ you and I both know i love when you punish me more then praising me~

Damn she was right, so well, she definitely got what she wished for as you hurriedly brought her back home and proceeded to fuck her like she was a toy, slapping her ass, pulling her hair, biting her nipples and leaving hickey after hickey all over her toned body felt amazing and when all was said and done........she wanted more

OMG A WHOLE FIC IN MY INBOX???

DEHYA......!!

#📜.qi chats #chats with ninjacomix! #genshin smut #sub genshin #dehya smut #sub dehya #top male reader #dehya is going to be on my mind for the next day or so

[booksandchainmail]

Hand on the chisel, or Song Ren's rigid, brittle self-control

From Pale Lights book 2

Chapter 2:

Song’s lips thinned, but she held her tongue. You are stone shaped by the chisel of life, she recited. Will it be your hand wielding the tool, or theirs? If she gave her anger to others, she relinquished the chisel – and that was unacceptable.

Chapter 8:

It was one thing to hold a member of her cabal, another to beat them. That would not be tolerated. Hand on the chisel, Song reminded herself, but wrenched open the door harder than necessary.

Chapter 11:

She grit her teeth. To say this was to insult their very contract, since she had asked to – Song smoothed out the thought, the rising anger. He did it, she knew, to get a rise out of her. But she would not fall for it this time. Song had prepared herself, meditated on the matter. Her hand would remain on the chisel.

Chapter 13:

Song could see them creeping across the checkered, cracked floor of the entrance hall. The god was everywhere, blind hands tugging and pulling at the insides of Scholomance like a child at play – moving this and that, just itching to smash it all onto something that would scream. Hand on the chisel, she reminded herself. Fear would do her no good in this place. Fear never helped anywhere.

Chapter 16:

Song, instead, calmly rose and faced as much as the wall as she could. She blinked, once, and breathed out. The sheer number of details was… Hand on the chisel, the Tianxi reminded herself.

Chapter 16:

“Trade on your own time,” Colonel Cao told the students. “We move on.” Song almost flinched. Hand on the chisel.

Chapter 18:

It smelled burnt. Swallowing thickly, Song looked down and saw that in her fugue she had left the chicken unattended too long. The top was still pink, but when she flipped the cuts she saw they had charred stripes. The Tianxi swallowed. If she cut them out perhaps it wouldn’t show? No, they’ll still see I cut out parts. Perhaps if she sliced every piece in two, then – no, idiot, they would notice the quantity was too small. One of them would ask. They would know. Hands shaking, tearing up like a fucking child, Song did the only rational thing she could: she put the pot off the fire, went outside with a shovel and dug a hole in a corner of the garden. She emptied the burnt chicken into it – she’d have to buy another to replace it from her own funds – and filled the hole. She had to hurry, they could be back anytime now. Song opened the windows to get rid of the smell and cleaned the iron pot before doing the recipe properly this time. When her cabal began arriving one after the other, Song was ready. She welcomed them with a smile and a meal and her hand remained on the chisel as they all sat together and ate. Like a proper brigade, led by a proper captain.

Chapter 21:

And he was right, she realized. It would be their word against his, and though she was confident they would come out ahead in the hearing the incident would be added to her record. She had shot a watchman from behind. Every superior officer she could ever have would know she had crippled someone wearing the black. Who would trust her after that? Who would let her stand behind them? Song had already seen how bad it would be, fighting against the tide, and now mere minutes out of that place she was somehow making it all worse. She had learned nothing, made all that pain and grief pointless. Crack. “-of your life,” the man laughed. “You’re fucked, brat, you-” Her hand slipped. It was not the blow of a duelist or a soldier: her blade hacked into the man’s face like a butcher knife. “You trash,” she snarled, ripping her blade out and hacking down again. “You relic, you-” Song screamed and struck again. And again, and again and again. He had cornered her, ended her career. Only when her arm hurt and her breath was ragged did the silver-eyed girl fall to her knees, choking out a sob, fingers closed around the chisel she had used to make a ruin of the watchman.

#pale lights #song ren #i love her so much #girl who is so so normal and in control of herself goes through a terrible horrible no good very bad week #and has a perfectly rational secret chicken meltdown so she can keep being Normal #and then things Get Worse and it turns out the alternative to self-loathing spirals is brutal knife murder! #(followed by immediately externalizing all of it so she can be normal again) #i want to force her to take a vacation

[absolutepokemontrash]

Wait wait WAIT,

Tulsi got something for Venus?

Elaborate please 👀

Tulsi gets things for Venus all the tiiiiiiiiiime, he’s in loooooooooove

Ash: GROSS.

But yea, the two of them are in that awkward high school students with their first love phase. It’s really sweet :3

Tulsi can be a little shit though, y’know, the old “pull the pigtails because I can’t express that I like-like you” method.

#asks #ask #anon #the brat brigade #obey me fankids

[houseoflibra]

Hunter vs shitty brat brigade

In the original strip, Thor complains that they're talking with a bad English accent, but that would be weird in an English translation, so there you have it... ^^;

Original tweet: https://twitter.com/tunakansuda/status/1722770078775820333

#saint seiya #rerise of poseidon #extras and stuff

[sacrificialsam]

dean pain is so annoying like yes dean has feelings but not everything is about him guys.

i hate it in the show obviously but the way it extends to fandom and dean fans will make everything about dean pain actually gets me angry. its an immediate block

recently saw a gifset about sams eating habits and some of the replies are insane!!!!

"sam is fussy because dean sacrificed and made sure he was never hungry whereas dean eats everything bcuz big bad john starved him uwu"

or even worse "sam thought he was a chubby 12 year old when he was "well fed" bcuz dean was so emaciated from being so underfed and he felt guilty about it :("

like????? you sound crazy and it says so much about what you think about people with eating disorders. im killing them with my mind powers. literally everything bad that happened to sam is just fodder for the "dean is a poor little victim" brigade

everything boils down to "sam is a spoiled brat who doesnt realise how much martyr dean has sacrificed for him" which is crazy cuz dean really hasnt protected him all that much, not in the show and imo, not as children

i completely understand you anon, i have like half of the fandom blocked on my main for almost this exact reason. the framing of dean being kind, punished, nurturing etc, while sam is selfish, evil, spoiled always feels like a thinly veiled attempt at deflecting from the actual heinous stuff dean does, especially to sam sometimes. it's all about making dean the victim, woobifying him in a way, and it really shows in people's headcanons about abuse as well, which it think is even worse than the already bad ones about eating disorders. malnourished dean specifically is such a wet dream for people who love woobifying dean, because we know comparatively little about their childhoods so headcanons are less easily disproved, and stuff that we do know (lack of money, lack of food) paint a very sad picture of it. i'm not saying you can't argue that dean has had issues with food in the past, but saying sam should feel bad for it, sam who was also just a hungry little kid, is ridiculous. i personally do not believe dean went days without food just so sam could have some more, he'd probably steal money or groceries before it came to that, or even go to charities. dean is self destructive, but he's not stupid. also the narrative of john maliciously starving dean is stupid as hell, why would you train your child to survive fighting monsters just to sabotage them by intentionally starving them? in a scenario when there wasn't enough food i 100% believe john ate less so sam and dean could have enough, but people love to pretend john was actually satan before they use their brains.

#ask #anon

[coffeetailor]

GTOber Day 7: Sweater Weather

(A/N: Yep, out of order and off date. Have some cute.)

Shang Hua, also known as Airplane Shooting Into the Sky, still couldn't believe his luck. Who would have thought that a single chance encounter with his biggest hater... would actually improve his life. starting with the improvement of his 'great' life's work. For being such a vicious little angry bean, the kid had a good heart. And enough spare change to not only pay his rent, but move him into a better apartment!

And without the risk of eviction and starvation on the table, he'd been able to stop pandering to the incel brigade that had made up so much of his paying audience, and actually take his time to write the story he'd wanted to at the start.

It was in visiting his old, long-buried notes, that he first saw the little figurine on his desk blink.

There hadn't been very much merchandise made from PIDW, and only a fraction of it actually featured his king, but he'd lived on expired noodles rescued from the bin for a month to get his hands on this one. Cast resin with a cheap paint job that he'd redone himself (why did they keep making his king's hair white? Yes, he was an ice demon, but he'd never described white hair!), he'd touched every inch of it. No part was meant to be able to move. Especially not the eyes.

But the figurine had blinked anyway. and then turned its head. And glared at him before threatening the author if he didn't release the 'spell' he had on him to seal his powers.

It took days to convince Mobei-Jun (alive! In his apartment! And as heartbreakingly gorgeous as he'd ever imagined in writing out his descriptions) that he hadn't actually done anything to him. At least not on purpose! By the end of that, the little figuring somehow got it into his head instead that Shang Hua was a god, and he couldn't be convinced otherwise. At least it meant that he could sleep without fear of the demon clawing his eyes out. It didn't prevent him from ordering him around like a servant, however.

So they'd come to a peace. The living figurine didn't get hungry, but he snitched from Shang Hua's plate every day anyway. And demanded a room stocked with ice all summer, which was made with an opened cooler left in the living room. By the time that fall rolled around, Shang Hua was almost used to his tiny roommate.

Which wasn't to say that Mobei was entirely used to Shang Hua or the world he lived in.

"What are you wearing?"

Blinking at his tiny roommate, Shang Hua looked down at his sweater, a big chunky thing that was two sizes too large, but was also one of the coziest things he owned. "This, my king? It's just a sweater. We wear them to keep warm in the colder seasons. We don't do so well as you in chilly weather."

Mobei-Jun frowned, studying his outfit with cat-like judgement before motioning him over to the table they'd set up his room on. Obediently, Shang Hua walked over and offered him a hand. The demon hadn't been particularly enthused about being carried at the start, but after figuring out that his teleportation powers were gone with the rest, he'd decided that the author was going to be his own personal carriage whenever he wanted to leave the desk.

Spoiled brat.

This time, instead of climbing up into his hand, Mobei grabbed it and pulled him closer, Shang Hua barely avoiding falling on his face by catching himself with his free hand. He was tiny and his powers didn't work, but that didn't mean that he wasn't still strong! "My king?"

Mobei-Jun poked at the cuff of his sweater, examining the fiber and the pattern like he was judging it. Which... he probably was. He'd already made his opinion of most of Shang Hua's clothes known (namely that they were strange and indecent, and this from a man who kept his chest bared to the world), so there wasn't much hope that the sweater would meet his standards either.

"What is this fiber?"

Shang Hua rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand. "Eh... I'm not actually sure. Probably some poly blend? All I know is that it was dryer safe so I don't have to wait for it to air dry."

Mobei eyed him. "You don't use the 'dryer' on this king's clothing."

"My king, you wear fur and silk! Which is absolutely not safe to use in the dryer! And even if it was, the stitching is so fine that I'd be worried about it getting torn in there! Besides, they dry a lot faster than a sweater does," he said, trying to shake the idea that his king was pouting. "I'm happy to keep washing your things by hand. There isn't much here to get them dirty in the first place anyway."

"Then we should leave this place," the living figure said, lifting his chin to stare the author down. Which would have been easier had he been taller than him.

Shang Hua had been about to protest that he had writing to do all day, when he remembered that he'd actually sent his last chapter off to Cucumber last night. And that he wasn't posting at breakneck speed anymore. Besides, with the colder weather, maybe his king would like to get outside.

Smiling, he once again offered his hand. "Okay. You'll have to stay out of sight though. I don't think people would react well if they saw you."

Not to mention that his king was so small... he could get hurt. Something that he knew would utterly break his heart if it happened.

He was wise enough not to mention that, however.

This time, Mobei stepped up onto his hand, using his arm as a ramp up to his shoulder from there. His hands when he touched the side of Shang Hua's neck for balance were ice cold of course, but how could he complain when having him there was just more adorable than he was willing to risk saying. But that didn't keep him from shivering when the icy little figure burrowed his way inside the collar of his sweater to lean against more skin!

"Comfortable, my king?" he asked, trying not to shiver too much and bother him. Powers or not, Mobei was perfectly capable of stabbing him in the neck!

There was a small sound of agreement from just below his ear and he smiled, grabbing keys and wallet before going for the door. Maybe if he thought about this right, it could almost be like a date. The idea of it, a date with his favorite creation, put a spring in his step. What a lovely, chilly day.

#writing #fanfiction #mobei jun #moshang #svsss #gtober2023 #shang qinghua #Coffeetailor is typing...

[stardestroyer81]

Pizza Tower features a wide variety of foes for Peppino to plow his way through, though if I had to chose my ultimate favorite enemy in the entire game, I'd have to go with the Bad Rat. I love literally everything about their animations and I always get super excited whenever I come across one!

It was when I first attempted to draw a Bad Rat that I realized the potential of taking one and making it into my very own Pizza Tower OC... enter Brat the Rat, the punkish and portly rival to Gustavo's right-hand rodent, Brick the Rat!

(Check under the cut for some insight on Brat's character as well as concept art!)

We all know that Peppino Spaghetti has his fair share of rivals, and while it's unanimously agreed upon that his ultimate foe is the villainous Pizzaface, I've always thought that the Noise made for a better fit as the Italian's evil double. I mean, they do hate each other with a passion.

But how cool would it be if Brick the Rat had his own rival (Gustavo doesn't need a rival, he's too precious to have one)? There's a distinct difference between Brick and the Bad Rats (I.E. tail color, ear length, messier whiskers, etc.), and I thought it would serve as a neat basis for a Pizza Tower OC!

Brat the Rat is the commander of the Bat Rat brigade in the Pizza Tower, and sent Brick out to dispose of the intruders of their domain. However, after Gustavo and Brick's eventual friendship, Brat takes it upon himself to disregard the incompetence of his inferiors and go after the true threat to the tower, Peppino, personally.

He is best described as a conniving though lazy figure of authority, and spends most of his time snooping about The Pig City or at home in the fittingly named sewer level. In spite of his mean demeanor and meaner intentions, Brat also has a seldom-seen (At least to anyone besides the Bad Rats) gentler side, and can be a complete and total cuddle bug if he trusts you enough.

I find that Pizza Tower sprites are easiest to draw if you sketch them out beforehand, and that's just what I did with Brat! I wanted Brat to be larger than the standard Bad Rat by a longshot, and that he'd tower over Peppino when sitting upright, so I made conceptual sketches of the such before going into spriting.

Honestly, it took me a little while to figure out Brat's body shape when he isn't laying on his front, but I've since perfected it and can safely say he is easily one of the easiest and most fun of my OCS to draw! Seeing how big of a hit he was to some of my mutuals outside of tumblr, I figured I'd show him off to y'all on tumblr as well! 🍕✨

#Star's Art #Star's OCs #Brat the Rat #Peppino Spaghetti #Pizza Tower #Pizza Tower OC #Sprite Art #Coolness #HE'S THE GIANT RAT THAT MAKES ALL OF DA RULES. #I've only had Brat the Rat for about two days and he is unironically one of my most beloved OCs #He started out as a sketch of a much larger Bad Rat though I grew attached to the concept more than I thought I would #Shrimp suggested I give him a hat so I gave him a beanie... and thus Brat the Rat was born! #One thing I wanted to save for the tags was the sprite I drew of Peppino #Let me say that again... #The sprite I— StarDestroyer81— drew of Peppino #That's right; the sprite of Peppino featured in this post isn't a frame of one of his animations... #... but instead one I drew specifically for this post from the ground up! #IT'S LITERALLY THE BEST PEPPINO I'VE DRAWN BY A W I D E MARGIN. #I think it's 'cause I'm finally getting a feel for drawing his face and body but IT FLAT-OUT LOOKS OFFICIAL #With that aside I do intend on drawing Brat some more very soon #I wanna see if I can do a piece where I'm hugging him because like #The man's hug shaped. That is a rat made for hugging. #Plus I really like him so I think it'd be a cute piece!

[octoberautumnbox]

Busan Brat Brigade when? 😅

GHOSTY HIIIIIII

actually the nice folks at the bunker might have an idea for that LMAO but it's definitely something I wanna try writing out as I think it contrasts well with Cute and Caring Noona from Apartment 424 and it's a trope I'm not into irl so I'm excited to see how it works :D

[xxdumbblondexx]

--- Additional Learning Support ---

9 - on fire and full of screaming kids

Master list --- Next --- Previous

You flapped a tea towel desperately around, trying to clear the smoke that flooded the whole down stairs of your home. If you found that little shit in this smoke, you swore you would kill it before your parents had the chance to kill you. 

All you did was turn you back for five seconds and she’d set fire to the kitchen roll. Then while you put that out, she set fire to the rug. Then the curtains. Then the actual cookie dough. 

As soon as you got a hold of her, you knew you had to shake her down to see if she was hiding matches or gasoline on her person. 

All the while, the two children ran about giggling. Like it was the funniest thing and that they weren't about to have the front seats to your FUNERAL. 

A knock against the front door and you were sure it was the fire brigade here to confiscate the child. Still, through the smoke you found the way to the door, coughing your lungs up in the process. 

“I know the fire alarm’s going off! I think I've put it out unless that brat has started another!” You shouted to whoever was on the opposite side of the door, hoping, praying that it was your big brother here to save your ass. 

You did not, however, expect it to be Albedo, standing there, stunned. 

A few seconds passed where neither of you said a word, only staring in surprise at each other. 

That was then spoiled by another fire alarm in your home beginning to scream out and the innocent giggling of Klee flooding out your house. 

“Klee!” Albedo shouted and, without invitation, charged inside your home.

By the time you regained the courage to walk inside the crime scene, you found almost every window in the building open and Albedo inside your living room. He knelt before Klee, holding both of her hands in his and staring into her huge demon like eyes.

“And what have I said about using your toy to start fires?” 

“Explosion inside city wall, grounded be thy woe.” 

“Right, so do you want to tell me why you still did it?” 

Klee gave him a one shoulder shrug before looking off sideways with a pout that even though you were mad at her, you couldn't lie,it was adorable. 

His reply came in a sigh as he stood up straight once again, running a hand through his dusty blonde hair. 

“I want you to sit on this sofa until I finish tidying this up, ok?” Klee nodded her head to his question although her mouth stayed in a firm line. 

He watched her as she plopped herself on the sofa, arms crossed over her chest in a strop. 

“You know that sofa is flammable as well.” You said as he came closer to you, on his way into the kitchen. 

“Yep, but she won't be doing anything without Dodoco.” He raised his hand to show you a keychain with fluffy rabbit plushie on it, along with a round bunny-like ball.

“And that’s what she’s been starting fires with?” You tried to suppress the laugh hogging up the space in your throat. 

“Yeah, it’s in Jumpy Dumpty. It’s where she keeps all the explosives I keep in my lab.”  

The laugh actually began to suffocate you as it jumped into something else. 

“Lab? Explosives?!” 

“Yeah…I’ve tried anything to stop her from getting them and somehow she still does.” 

“Wow…I don't even know how to process that.” You dropped yourself at the doorway of your kitchen, trying to process everything you’d just heard. 

“Let me help you clean up. It’s the least I can do.” He said as he evaluated the disaster Klee had caused upon your kitchen. 

“Yeah sure, but can you do me a favour.” His eyes shot back to you and you took a moment to realise just how amazing they were. They were gold, too gold to be actual gold. It was more like sunlight, warm yet cold at the same time. 

“Put a flammable warning on that kid. Like seriously, she looks all angel like but that kids a demon.” 

“That kid’s my sister.” His words sounded like a warning but yet a smile was on his lips, telling you something different. 

You stalled for a second, mouth moving but no words coming out. You couldn’t determine if he was offended by that comment or was laughing about it. That caused you to spit out the only thing you could think of as, 

“I mean I'm related to Childe so who’s really winning here?”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hiyaaa,

Last one for tonight. I think after this is will possibly be only one or two every 3-5 days because my stocks have started to run low.

I hope your enjoying this and if you have anything to say or add, feel free to.

Thanks for reading x

#aether x reader #albedo x reader #genshin impact smau #genshin smau #genshin x reader #genshin impact #heizou x reader #kazuha x reader #scaramouche x reader #xiao x reader

[ionlydrinkhotwater]

WIP WEDNESDAY

A sneak peek of my Carry On Prompt comic: The Wellbeloves

An au where the Wellbeloves adopt Simon as a young child and raise him as their own. Simon and his big Sis Agatha are best friends and spend their days hanging out with their other besties: Penny and Pippa but the siblings become rivals over one T. Basilton Grimm-Pitch

Unlike the Gift Box this one will be all fun and fluff

Here's the Four Friends taking a cliché pouty selfie together. Penny refuses to cooperate, Pippas serving FACE and the Wellbelove kids are making themselves front and centre like the spoiled brats they are.

Thanks for the tags and no pressure friends

@confused-bi-queer @palimpsessed @stillmadaboutpetra @bookish-bogwitch @tea-brigade @kohatenz @johnwgrey @aroace-genderfluid-sheep @pacey-bunce-loves-joey @tectonicduck @artsyunderstudy @aristocratic-otter @captain-aralias @stardustasincocaine @fatalfangirl @angelsfalling16 @annabellelux @dragoneggo @frjsti @mrskrementz @krisrix @urban-sith @prettylightsbigcity @henreyettah @carryonsimoncarryonbaz @skeedelvee @orange-peony @cutestkilla @messofthejess @martsonmars @facewithoutheart @ileadacharmedlife @ivelovedhimthroughworse @nightimedreamersworld @sailor-blossoms @maedhrosrussandol @whatevertheweather @bazzybelle @erzbethluna @yellobb @subparselkie

#simon snow #simon snow series #the simon snow trilogy #baz pitch #snowbaz #carry on rainbow rowell #simon and baz #simon snow trilogy #wipsday #wip #wip wednesday #simon snow fan art #simon snow fan comic #simon snow comics #pippa stainton #penelope bunce #agatha wellbelove