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#the cow onesie will return...
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More Than This // Chad Meeks Martin x Reader x Ethan Landry*
request: none!
prompts: none!
summary: ethan landry is completely and totally hopelessly in love with you. the only problem? you're in a happy relationship with his roommate and best friend, chad.
warnings: language, a shit ton of angst, crying, smut, a wee bit of voyerism, masturbating (m), cumming in pants, yelling, ethan having impure thoughts about reader
word count: 3.1k
a/n: reader is referred to as girlfriend, but there's nothing specifically mentioned about gender other than that. no description of reader, other than being mentioned as shorter than chad. chad and reader are dating. there isn't any relationship going on between reader and ethan. no ghostface au. also this is my first time writing smut in a while so i hope it's alright!
part 2 part 3
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I'm broken, do you hear me?
I'm blinded, 'cause you are everything I see
I'm dancing alone, I'm praying
That your heart will just turn around
Ethan frowned as he looked over at you and Chad. The two of you were dancing together with your matching cowboy and cow onesie costumes, and you couldn’t have looked happier. Your arms were wrapped around Chad’s neck and his hands were placed on your waist. Ethan watched as Chad whispered something to you that made you giggle, and he felt his heart ache. He wanted to be the one you danced with, the one to hold you close, the one who would make you laugh.
But you were dating his roommate. And Chad was Ethan’s best friend, he’d never want to hurt him, but all Ethan could think about was you. He could never escape you. Even if he wasn’t thinking about you, you were still there. You and Chad went almost everywhere together, and you were always over at their dorm. Just constantly seeing you and Chad being happy together made Ethan’s pain that much worse.
And as I walk up to your door
My head turns to face the floor
'Cause I can't look you in the eyes and say
Ethan stared at the text he had written to you, his finger hovering over the send button. He kept writing the same message over and over, pouring out his feelings to you, but he could never bring himself to send them. He was too scared. He knew there was no way that you could possibly return his feelings, and telling you how he felt would only set him up for more heartbreak. You were with Chad, and you were happy. Who was Ethan to get in the way of that?
And besides, he couldn’t do that to Chad. Sometimes Ethan felt that Chad was the only friend he had, he didn’t want to risk losing him over his stupid infatuation with you. Ethan sighed, deleting the text and shutting his phone. He huffed, leaning back against the pillows on his bed, deciding to wallow in self pity instead of fucking everything up by confessing. 
When he opens his arms and holds you close tonight
It just won't feel right
'Cause I can love you more than this, yeah
Ethan heard the door to his dorm open and shut, giggling and whispers following the noise. Great. You and Chad were back from your date. It was nights like these that Ethan couldn’t be more grateful that his dorm had separate bedrooms. At least he wasn’t forced to see you and Chad being all lovey dovey, that would just feel like the two of them rubbing salt in his never healing wound. 
The door to Chad’s bedroom was flung open, and Ethan heard you laugh again. He smiled slightly to himself, the beautiful noise cheering him up a bit. But that newfound happiness was short lived, because he knew what came next. Walking over to his desk, Ethan searched for his noise canceling headphones, but they were nowhere to be found. He cursed to himself when he remembered he had lent them to Anika so she could focus better while trying to study. Just great. Now he had nothing to block out the sounds of you and Chad. This was going to be a long night.
When he lays you down, I might just die inside
It just don't feel right
'Cause I can love you more than this
Can love you more than this
Ethan laid on his bed, staring at the ceiling, willing himself to fall asleep. Unfortunately, he was still wide awake. He didn’t even know how long it’s been, but you and Chad were still going at it like rabbits. Chad’s headboard continually slammed against the wall, the banging ruining any chance Ethan had of sleeping. But that wasn’t the worst part. The worst part about Ethan’s current situation was you.
The walls in their dorm were incredibly thin, allowing for sounds to be heard from the other side easily. Ethan could hear you moaning out Chad’s name over and over again, along with your other whines and whimpers. It was all Ethan could focus on. You sounded so… hot. Usually he had his noise canceling headphones on, blocking out all the sounds you and Chad make. But now that he could hear you, he regretted ever using those stupid headphones in the first place. 
Before he could even realize what was happening, Ethan was hard. He whimpered softly as he felt his throbbing erection continue to grow each time you moaned. He felt guilty about feeling like this, especially since you were currently fucking his best friend, but his overwhelming need made his guilt almost disappear. 
He pulled the blankets off of him, and brought his hand down to his hard on, grinding his palm against it. He whimpered in relief at the feeling, speeding up his movements, practically humping his hand. Was he really doing this? Getting off to his best friend’s girlfriend’s moans? He felt dirty. Perverted. But somehow, that made this all the more exciting.
Ethan continued, grinding his palm down against his clothed cock, while his hips bucked up in tandem. He closed his eyes, imagining that you were the one touching him, and that he was the one getting you to make those incredible noises. Ethan bit his lip, struggling to hold in his moans. He was getting closer and closer. Then, he heard you through the wall.
“Oh, fuck! Fuck, m’ cumming! Fuck…” you trailed off into a high pitched whine.
Ethan opened his eyes when he felt a growing wet spot on his hand. He looked down and saw that he just came in his pants from hearing you finish. Great. Just great. He was supposed to be getting over you. And this was definitely not helping. 
If I'm louder, would you see me?
Would you lay down in my arms and rescue me?
'Cause we are the same, you save me
But when you leave, it's gone again
“Hey Ethan!” you said cheerily, sitting down next to him in the cafeteria.
“Hey…” he mumbled, his face flushing red as he looked away from you, the memories of what he had done last night still present in his mind.
You scrunched your face up in confusion when you saw how red Ethan looked. You immediately placed the back of your hand on his forehead, concern present on your face.
“Are you feeling alright? You look really red,” you asked, gently touching his forehead and cheeks to see if he had a fever.
Ethan felt himself blush even harder, the feeling of your hand on his face making his skin tingle and his head spin. He quickly shook his head and pulled away slightly, not wanting to develop another situation because of you. 
“No, I’m- I’m fine. Maybe just a little sunburnt is all.”
You pouted. “You really should wear sunscreen, Ethan. It’s not healthy if you don’t.”
Ethan nodded. “Uh, yeah. I’ll keep that in mind.”
Ethan was about to say something else, when Chad approached and sat down next to you, instantly taking your attention away from him. You smiled widely at Chad, pulling him into a hug and kissing his cheek.
“Hi baby! I missed you,” you said, a lovestruck look in your eyes.
Chad smiled back, looking equally infatuated with you. “I missed you too babe.”
Ethan grumbled to himself, the display of affection the two of you shared only making him long for you even more.
And then I see you on the street
In his arms, I get weak
My body fails, I'm on my knees, praying
It was movie night and Sam and Tara’s place, a weekly tradition that Mindy forcefully makes everyone participate in. Ethan sat by himself in a chair next to the couch, while you and Chad were curled up together in the loveseat across from him. Everyone else had piled onto the couch, or the floor in front of it. Mindy grabbed the remote and excitedly started some horror movie that she’s been adamant about making everyone watch. But Ethan could barely bring himself to pay attention.
He kept his gaze on you and Chad, squished close together as Chad buried his face in your neck. You wrapped your arms around him, holding him close and trying to comfort him from the scary images on the screen. Despite how scared your boyfriend was, you couldn’t help but smile at how adorable he looked, your six foot tall boyfriend clinging to his much smaller girlfriend for protection.
Ethan tried to watch the movie, he really did, but all he could think about was how badly he wished it was him that you were holding instead of Chad. No matter what he did, Ethan couldn’t get over you. He had almost given up on trying at this point. He was hopelessly in love with you. And he would just have to deal with that. 
When he opens his arms and holds you close tonight
It just won't feel right
'Cause I can love you more than this, yeah
The movie finally ended, and Ethan managed to force himself to pay attention to the second half of the movie. He was definitely confused about the plot, and had absolutely no idea what happened, but at least he stopped staring at you and Chad like some creep.
“Aw, guys look!” Anika said, pointing to the loveseat you and Chad were on.
The two of you had fallen asleep, Chad curled up in your arms. The sight of you and Chad sleeping together so peacefully, so happily, it just made the heartache and longing he felt for you that much worse. Because he knew he would never get to be with you like that. He would never get to be the one to fall asleep in your arms, the one you protected from scary movies, the one you held close. No matter how badly he wished and prayed to be yours, he knew that it would never happen.
Sam stood up from the couch and grabbed a blanket, placing it over you and Chad. She smiled down at the two of you warmly, the sight just so incredibly adorable.
“They’re so cute together,” she said, smiling to herself as she walked back to the couch.
“I know!” Tara added, swooning over how perfect you and Chad looked together. “It’s like they were meant to be.”
When he lays you down, I might just die inside
It just don't feel right
'Cause I can love you more than this
Ethan couldn’t take it anymore, seeing you and Chad sleeping in each others’ arms, hearing all his friends fawn over how cute you and Chad were. It was all too much. He felt his heart shatter and his eyes welled up with tears. He blinked forcefully, trying to stop them from falling.
Ethan stood up, starting to head towards the door. “I think I’m gonna head back to my dorm for the night. I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”
Anika frowned. “You’re not staying? I thought we were all sleeping over here tonight?”
“Yeah, you always stay. What’s going on?” Mindy added. 
“Nothing. I just don’t feel like it tonight.”
Quinn furrowed her brows in confusion. “It doesn’t seem like nothing. Is something bothering you?”
Ethan huffed in frustration. “Nothing’s bothering me. Just drop it.”
Before anyone could respond, he was already out the door.
I've never had the words to say
But now I'm asking you to stay
For a little while inside my arms 
“Hey, man. Where were you last night? Mindy said you left early and that you seemed all upset about something,” Chad said, sitting down in the desk next to Ethan.
Ethan shook his head. “She’s overreacting. Nothing’s bothering me. I… I just had this paper to work on last night that I forgot about. That’s it,” Ethan replied, hoping his excuse didn’t sound as shitty as he thought it did.
Chad looked skeptical but brushed it off. “Alright. Well, hope you got it done in time then.”
“Thanks,” Ethan said, a forced smile on his face.
Chad looked like he wanted to say something else, but their professor walked in and began talking, gaining Ethan’s attention. Chad wanted to press for more, he felt like there was something Ethan wasn’t telling him. But now probably wouldn’t be the best time, especially since he seemed so tense about whatever it was. Maybe he could get you to ask Ethan about it later. Ethan always seemed so much calmer when you were around. 
And as you close your eyes tonight 
I pray that you will see the light
That's shining from the stars above
And I say
“Ethan! Hey, wait up!” you shouted, running to catch up to Ethan who was on the other side of the quad.
Ethan’s head perked up when he heard your voice, and he stopped walking, waiting for you to reach him. A few moments later, you stood by Ethan’s side, your hands on your knees and you panted from your jog over. You held up a finger to Ethan, asking him to give you a minute as you caught your breath. 
“You alright?” Ethan asked, a smile growing on his face.
You nodded, slowly beginning to breathe normally. “Yep. Just wasn’t prepared to run that much. I’m- I’m fine.” You finally managed to calm your breathing, and smiled at Ethan to prove you were really okay.
“So, why’d you just sprint across the quad? Did you miss me that much, or did you need something?” Ethan asked, laughing to himself slightly.
“Uhm, yeah actually. I needed to talk to you. It’s about last night.”
Ethan’s smile faltered. “What about it?”
“Chad wanted me to ask you about what happened. He told me that you said you forgot about a paper, but I know that’s not true. You’re too insanely organized to forget an assignment. So, what happened? Why’d you bail?”
Ethan shook his head, turning to walk away. “I’m not talking about this right now.”
You huffed and grabbed his shoulder, forcing him to turn around. “Ethan, I’m worried about you. We all are. Just talk to me. Tell me what’s wrong.”
“I can’t!” Ethan said, his voice slightly louder.
When he opens his arms and holds you close tonight
It just won't feel right
'Cause I can love you more than this, yeah
‘Cause I can love you more than this, yeah
“Why not? I’m here for you Ethan, we all are. Just let me in. I want to help you.”
Ethan turned his head and looked at the ground, not wanting to look into your eyes. If he looked into your eyes right now, he knew his resolve would crumble, and all of the feelings that he’d been holding back would all come spilling out.
“I can’t tell you. You wouldn’t get it. You can’t help me,” Ethan said, his voice growing quieter as he felt your gaze stay trained on him.
You placed your hands on his shoulders, trying to make him look at you again. What was once just a minor concern about whatever happened at the sleepover now grew into a full blown panic. You had never seen Ethan like this. So small, so fragile. He had seemed so put together, having everything under control. But seeing him like this, you couldn’t help but feel your heart break. He looked so sad. So scared. And you hated it. 
“Try me. Please. Let me in. Whatever you’re dealing with, you can’t do it on your own. Don’t push me away. I know we aren’t the closest, but I do consider you a friend. And I care about you. So please, just tell me what’s wrong. Don’t let yourself suffer by trying to deal with it all on your own.”
When he lays you down, I might just die inside
It just don't feel right
'Cause I can love you more than this, yeah
“Fine, you want me to tell you?” Ethan said, finally looking into your eyes.
You nodded. “I really want you to.”
Ethan huffed, rubbing his eyes with his fists in frustration. “I- I want to tell you. I really do. But if I say this, I can’t take it back. I don’t want to ruin everything. I don’t want to lose you.”
You frowned, stepping closer to him. “You won’t ruin anything. Just please, tell me. Let me in, Ethan.”
“I’m in love with you, okay?!” Ethan shouted, squeezing his eyes shut, terrified of how you would react.
“What…?” you asked, your eyes wide in shock. 
“I’ve loved you since the day I first met you. Which sucks, because you’re with Chad, and I know you don’t feel the same. But I’ve been suffering every single time I see you with him. I wish that was me. I want to be the one that you love. I want to be the one you’re with. And I know it’s wrong, I know I can never have you like that. But- I- I just-,” Ethan trails off, his rambling cut off by his own panic. 
And then Ethan does the unthinkable. He kisses you.
When he opens his arms and holds you close tonight
It just won't feel right
'Cause I can love you more than this, yeah
Once he realized what he had done, he pulled away. He was too panicked to realize that you had kissed back. You looked up at Ethan, your eyes wide in shock and confusion. You had no idea what you were feeling, emotions swirling and exploding inside of you. But Ethan interpreted your expression as disgust and hate. He looked at you guiltily, slowly backing away.
“I’m sorry. I- I shouldn’t have done that. I don’t know why I- I’m so sorry,” Ethan said, his eyes wide as he took another step backwards.
“Ethan…” you said, your expression softening when you saw how terrified he looked.
“No- I- I shouldn’t have…” Ethan said, turning around and running off, not wanting to have to face you another second. 
“Ethan, wait! Ethan…” you called after him, but he didn’t turn around. 
“Wait…” you said softly, trailing off when he finally faded from view. 
When he lays you down, I might just die inside
It just don't feel right
'Cause I can love you more than this
Can love you more than this
tags: @wenvierismycomfort
if your name is crossed off, it means i can't tag you!
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kodaiki · 2 years
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꒰ HOW YOUR RELATIONSHIP GETS FOUND OUT ꒱
↳ note ⨾ repost! ↳ genre ⨾ fluff ↳ feat. iwaizumi, bokuto & kuroo
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ʚ IWAIZUMI ɞ
it wasn’t planned...your relationship with iwaizumi was to stay under wraps at least until the season was over so no distractions would occur within the team. please, the last thing they’d need is to find out their precious manager was dating their own ace.
all sorts of chaos would ensue!
but it seems as thought the universe likes meddling with your plans...
of course, it was oikawa who found out about it.
on one of the rare days you’d been cleaning up the gym alone with iwaizumi – you were certain the rest of the boys had started walking home – while iwaizumi takes down the nets and sweeps the floor, you return the volleyballs to the cart in the corner of the gym. just as you finish plopping the last ball into the cart, you feel a pair of arms snake around your waist.
you let out a squeal when iwaizumi effortlessly swings you in a circle before settling you down. you spin on your heel to swat his shoulder. “haji, you scared me-!”
“how’d i do today?” he asks, lips tugging up on one side, amused by your flared expression. 
scrunching your nose up, it still baffles you how easy going he could be around you without the others around. still, you find it endearing.
“amazing, as always,” you roll your eyes, stepping away from him only to be pulled back into his embrace with a jerk of his arm, making you laugh at his affection. he turns his cheek to face you, patiently awaiting a greeting kiss, something you can’t do around the others. leaning up, you press your lips to his cheek, smiling slightly.
really, you thought you were both alone. 
but, oh how wrong you were. the loud shriek of a gasp makes you spring away from iwaizumi’s cheek you were pecking and with a turn of your head, you came face to face with a bewildered oikawa. it becomes a stare off between the three of you, oikawa averting his eyes every second to you and iwaizumi until a satisfied smile graces his lips.
“about time!” he announces before scurrying out of the room, surely to share the news to the others. don’t worry, though, because iwaizumi is already running after him, shouting angry threats his way.🏃🏻‍♂️💨
“hey makki! mattsun!! we were right!!”
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 ʚ BOKUTO ɞ
it’s the cutest thing tbh... you're a student at nekoma hight and you met bokuto at one of the training camps! you were testing the ropes of being nekoma’s manager and you like to say that that trip was the sole reason you decide to seize the position. and it’s definitely not because of the cute ace on another team that practically begged to see you again sometime...
so! you get to talking and soon enough, feelings arise between the two of you and you decide to take your friendship to the next level.
the only people who don’t know about your relationship yet was nekoma! this is only because bokuto told the rest of his time before you could even register and give him a warning (he's an excited baby ok?) no worries though! his team could keep a secret. bokuto would love to randomly text kuroo about your relationship but to keep things calm between the teams (nekoma treats you like their baby), you’re adamant on keeping things quiet until you’re absolutely sure yamamoto they can handle it.
unfortunatly for you, the secret doesn’t last very long. on one of the nights you’re hanging out with bokuto at your place - it was movie and pamper night - you get an unexpected knock at your door. as you swing open the front door, lo and behold, kuroo and kenma are there.
kuroo gives you a big grin! “surprise!”
they explain that they wanted to hang out but at your quick denial, kuroo raised an eyebrow. you never turn down a game night. before he can ask about it, a familiar voice went, “who is it?”
bokuto, in a cow onesie (can y’all imagine that, i’m soft🥺), appears behind you and his eyes widen owlishly when he sees kuroo. kuroo purses his lips together and bokuto is sure he’s about to be yelled at. but then kuroo bends over in an explosion of laughter. “oh my god, what’re you wearing and what’s all over your face?”
bokuto turns defensive real quick, telling kuroo the importance of skin care, reciting exactly what you told him when he asked an hour earlier. the night goes on with you and kenma playing games while kuroo and bokuto argue over who's a better skin care tech🤡
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 ʚ KUROO ɞ
you think you’d be good at hiding a relationship. especially the one you share with kuroo. you don’t speak to each other too often during school or practice. hell, you hardly even look his way when you’re in the same room as your friends. however, this only seems to increase suspicion on the two of you. it’s almost weird how often you avoided each other at all costs.
one day after a practice, the team corners the two of you, keen on receiving answers for your odd behavior. the questions you got a problem with y/n, kuroo?, what’s so bad about our captain, y/n? and you got some sort of rivalry we don’t know about? are thrown at you both.
the two of you deny everything, looking absolutely shocked and flustered that they noticed so quickly.
the team doesn’t buy it. they think aloud, recalling the times you never interacted nor acknowledged each other. and just when kuroo defends the both of you by saying your paths don’t cross much so you don’t have too many chances to talk, yamamoto cuts him off, “something’s off about you two, though. y’all got history or something? that’d explain it.”
the rest of the team nods, suspicious looks dropping to more serious expressions. again, you and kuroo deny it all, sputtering out no way’s and that’s ridiculous! 
“that’s not it,” kenma deadpans, without bothering to look up from his switch. “they’re far too flustered to have bad history. they’re probably dating.”
a collective gasp fills the gym. the rest of them immediately begin agreeing and nodding as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“me and tetsu are NOT dating!”
a silence falls as soon as the words leaving your lips. every pair of eyes turns to look at you and you furrow your brows as they all blink at you. their faces, they’re all so blank. it isn’t until you avert your eyes to kuroo who’s grinning at you, looking at you expectantly.😀
“tetsu,” huh? his face says clearly.
“oh... oops."
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acaplaya-musings · 2 months
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Voiceplay Visuals: This Is Halloween
So obviously I'm not the only one who loves talking about Voiceplay and analysing their content, but I wanted to do something a bit different from the kinds of analyses/reactions that other people do, both on here and on Youtube (and music theory isn't really my forte anyway). So I'm planning on making some posts just focusing on the videos (and Geoff's as well, eventually), rather than the music arrangement or vocals or anything like that. My credentials are being a Drama Kid during my high school years, and experience with this sort of analysis from my time in other fandoms. I'm not planning on doing every single video, and though I'm gonna go chronologically from mid-2017 onwards (why not earlier? Because Reasons). However, since I yesterday finished a fanfic based on Voiceplay's cover of This Is Halloween, (which I studied a fair bit to get details right), I might as well start there!
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Oogie Boogie pumpkin just outside the front door! (And a Jack Skellington one on the other side I believe?) These pumpkin also shows up in the spooky Halloween realm the group are transported to after eating the candy.
Credit to one of the comments which said that Earl is wearing a cow onesie and Eli is wearing a rooster onesie, which more likely than not is a callback to their (extremely hilarious) Chicken Song performance. (J is wearing a CatDog onesie, I think Geoff is wearing a giraffe onesie? And I'm not sure what Layne's onesie is meant to be)
Again credit to a commenter (different one), pointing out that Eli deadpan elbows Layne in the back, pushing him down after he eats the candy (likely a not-so-subtle acting cue or something like that, but still very funny once you notice it)
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The return of the Jack and Oogie Boogie pumpkins, along with some other creatively-designed Jack-O-Lanterns! Peep the one on the far right, a little more towards the back; its 'eyes' say VP, and its mouth is the Voiceplay logo!
Also a little bit of foreshadowing, whether intentional or not: when Layne wakes up, one of the first things in his line of sight is the axe resting on the hay bales...
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First of all, how many pumpkins were carved just for this video? Because a lot of effort went into making all those different designs for sure (and no, I'm not part of Voiceplay's Patreon, as the tier that lets you see behind-the-scenes stuff is like $8.50 AUD per month, rip). And second of all, this is a decent shot of how the group starts out upon waking up. J None is wearing a yellow plaid flannel quite similar to The Wolfman in Nightmare Before Christmas, and Earl is wearing denim overalls, like the behemoth character. Eli's outfit is of course representative of the Mayor of Halloweentown, but no spider bowtie or "Mayor" rosette (would've loved to see it, but eh no biggie). Layne I will get to in a moment, and Geoff a little bit after that.
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I can't be bothered getting a better picture of it but Eli's half-concerned half-weirded-out face after J's helium-like vocal line is very amusing to me
On the "eyes glowing red" line, Earl's eyes (which are white at this point) flash red for a very brief moment, basically blink-and-you-miss-it.
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The colour-change on Eli's left eye is so subtle that at first I didn't notice it at all, and then I only noticed it later on in the video, and only now, doing this analysis and taking a dozen screencaps, do I realize that it happens way earlier than I first thought (which explains why he takes his glasses off at this point I guess) (so uh, that's a minor inconsistency in my fanfic but it's fine)
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Shoutout to the makeup/SFX people who helped with this video honestly, they did a super good job, genuinely!
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(In which the frame-by-frame scrubbing technique comes in real handy)
An interesting choice to have Layne go through a sort of "half-transformation" stage, where he has a horn and red eye on one side of the face, while the other side of the face is normal. I like it though!
People have said that Layne is meant to be the devil (who is in fact another Halloweentown resident, but honestly I think he's meant to be Lock, or at least a combination of the two, because this what the two characters look like:
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See how Layne resembles Lock more? In the outfit choice if nothing else (Also he's kinda sorta got the right face shape for Lock imo). Also, Lock wears a red trick-or-treating mask with horns on top!
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Earl is really distressed about his hair falling out (not that I can blame him, really)
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This shot/moment is probably one of the ones that stands out to me the most (other than Certain Other Ones for Other Reasons that I will get to in a moment), because J comes across as pretty mournful here, like he knows what's happening but he's feeling really sad/regretful about it? (Also I only just noticed Eli's face in the background and I'm not sure what to make of it 😅)
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"pog" is not a word in my vocabulary 95% of the time, but this is basically just Pog faces right? (Geoff and Layne probably have the most fun of the group in this video ngl)
(Also I haven't yet touched on Geoff's transformations but I love the contouring work on his face!)
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My god this video is comedy gold when it comes to pausing/taking screenshots
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I daresay Eli ends up one of the least recognizable of the group by the end of it (other than J), and I wanna know how long that took to do
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Geoff is the only one in the video who gets an outfit upgrade (Good For Him)
They didn't bother being movie-accurate with Geoff's vampire appearance, and honestly I'm definitely not complaining. (they made him hotter)
Layne did the music arrangement, but Geoff was in charge of the video production. How much say did he have over his own costume/appearance I wonder?
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Visually speaking at least, nobody is even paying attention to him, they're just like "yeah that's just Geoff, normal behaviour, nothing new" 😆
I can't get a decent picture of it but shoutout to Layne doing a silly little run around the pumpkin stack, love that for him
Another small moment that a screencap wouldn't do justice: even as a vampire, Geoff still does his little self-conducting hand motions, which you might notice as he walks around the pumpkin stack, in the shot right after his "filling your dreams to the brim with fright" line
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Also love Geoff's little almost-Elvis-like moves in the background for a brief scene. I know multiple commenters have mentioned it, but I'm yet to see a reactor notice it
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Suddenly Layne is Concerned(tm) about Geoff's vampireness it seems?
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Also for someone who very much adores this guy, it took me an embarassingly long time to realise that Geoff's face at this point had become paler and his hairline had changed (and actually now that I type it up here, I think that might even be a wig? Oh dear)
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I don't really have anything to say about J's full transformation, but it would be unfair of me to not include him as well, and it's definitely a *very* impressive costume. Almost like one of those rubbery fully-covering-the-head costume mask things, but like it's his actual face?
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Is that tattoo real or fake, because I literally have never noticed it in any other Voiceplay video, but it's very realistic! (For that matter, what aobut Earl's upper-arm tattoo that kind of looks like a ring of barbed wire?)
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I basically watch the This Is Halloween opening scene from The Nightmare Before Christmas every October, and same with the What's This scene in December, but I had never actually watched the movie in full until December last year. So basically when they had the axe-in-the-head moment in the movie I was like ohhhhhhh so that wasn't just a random moment that Voiceplay dreamed up for the video! (I had a similar moment with the Mr Hyde character and his Mini Mr Hydes in his hat in the movie, but in relation to Voiceplay's Kidnap The Sandy Claws video)
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When Elizabeth Zharoff/The Charismatic Voice reacted to this video, she said that the kid at the end (Layne's nephew, apparently), was "adorable". Meanwhile Mortius' reaction to the end scene was "oh I didn't like that! It makes me feel like I'm next!" 😂
Also suddenly just realized that the "real world" scenes are in a different aspect ratio to the "spooky dream realm" scenes? Possibly intentional, but also possibly just due to them using two different types of cameras for the shots.
And that's a wrap! I was hoping to get this done and posted last night but it took longer than expected. Hope you enjoyed it, as I'm thinking of writing up at least one or two more now, and scheduling them for daily releases. See ya!
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prismaticpichu · 2 years
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Ideas for Zack & Sephiroth friendship fics?? My imagination hasn’t returned from the coffee shop and my boredom has reduced me to watching a horror flick about killer jeans.
Birthdays, sleepovers, common colds, homesickness, and snowball fights are all stories sitting in my dusty trophy case of a series! Sephiroth’s sheer existence means some angst here and there, though that’s where the best friend magic comes into play (No, I haven’t grown up yet *sips cocoa in cow onesies*).
I’m a desperate bean and I’m proud of it!! Thank you!!! ❤️
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god-whispers · 10 months
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jun 2
friday headlines
Pride Month 2023 Launches To A First-Ever Major Pushback As Glamour Magazine Features ‘Pregnant Man’ Logan Brown On Their Digital Edition Cover Pride Month 2023 officially started today, and to quote the movie ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’, it’s ‘shaping up to be a squall!’. Glamour Magazine is featuring ‘proof’ of a ‘pregnant man’ on the cover of its UK digital edition which is emblematic of what the true problem really is.
Elon Musk’s Neuralink Gets FDA Approval to Study Brain Implants in Humans Neuralink, Elon Musk’s neurotechnology company, recently obtained approval from the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) to conduct a clinical study of brain implants in humans. This marks the first in-human clinical study for the company.
Criminals ‘Can Find Everything’ About You, Warns Surveillance Expert Artificial intelligence (AI) has advanced to such a level that criminals can now surveil and know “everything” about their targets, including predicting where the targets could be at some point in the future, experts warn.
Shocking New York Times Review of The Little Mermaid Complains the Children’s Film Had Insufficient ‘Kink’ The review, perhaps correctly, noted that the film “reeks of obligation and noble intentions,” but lost most people when it continued to say “joy, fun, mystery, risk, flavor, kink — they’re missing.”
Synthetic biology aims to replace natural life forms with something that is man-made Several years ago, leaked FEMA documents described that people would be put into FEMA camps for, essentially, re-education.  That concept “is old,” Celeste Solum told Maria Zeee.  The plan has been replaced by a “posthuman” ideology.
Now or Never – Israel and Iran’s Nuclear Weapons Program Iran is busy building new, impenetrable nuclear bunkers and developing advanced ballistic missiles. What is Israel waiting for? There are all kinds of developments that indicate Israel is getting closer to direct action against Iran.
‘Surveillance over every citizen on Earth’: Devious group looks to rule entire world The World Health Organization has set its sights on establishing “a platform for global governance through health care.”
Fears Satanists have returned as lamb’s throat slit and has Bible placed on dead body A coven of Satanists could again be stalking the New Forest, locals fear, after a slaughtered lamb was found with a bloodstained Bible resting on its body. There were concerns raised in 2019 after evidence of Satanic rituals was found in the forest. Pigs were found with their hearts ripped out and sheep and cows were also killed and mutilated.
REVEALED: Target tells employees only ‘extremists’ are concerned with sexualization of children As Target faces backlash, resulting in monetary losses over its Pride collection, the company has sent an internal memo stating that those who worry about the sexualization of children are extremists. The line includes clothing and accessories for children, including shirts that read “Queer! Queer! Queer!” and onesies about how trans is beautiful.
Thousands Of Roman Catholics Flock To Worship At The Dead Body Of ‘Miracle Nun’ Sister Wilhelmina Lancaster Whose Body Did Not Decay The ‘miracle nun’ Sister Wilhelmina Lancaster whose exhumed body showed nearly no signs of decomposition four years after she died is drawing thousands of Roman Catholics hoping to worship her corpse
Biden’s ex-nuclear official played key role in blasphemous drag ‘nuns’ group The disgraced former Biden administration official, Sam Brinton, reportedly used to serve as the principal officer for Washington D.C.’s chapter of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence…Brinton was also present at an explicit Easter Sunday event in San Francisco in 2019, where scantily clad men mimicked Christ’s crucifixion and poll-danced on a cross.
EMA admits COVID Vaccination causes Infertility The European Medicines Agency (EMA) has finally admitted that Covid-19 vaccination can have an adverse effect on female fertility. The admission comes months after it was revealed in confidential Pfizer documents revealed that shedding of the Covid-19 vaccine is possible by skin-to-skin contact and/or breathing the same air as a vaccinated person, and can, unfortunately, lead to menstrual cycle disruption among women and miscarriage among pregnant women.
Disneyland Hires Man In Dress to Greet Little Girls At Bibbidy Bobbidi Boutique A video that was uploaded on Twitter by Jason Jones shows a grown man wearing a dress at Disneyland’s Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique. In the video a man who clearly has a mustache is wearing a dress and greeting little girls as they walk into the dress boutique.
satan Has Become One Of The Hottest Spiritual Figures In America Should we be surprised?  As our society comes apart at the seams all around us, Satan and Satanism are becoming extremely popular.  Videos featuring Satan are getting millions of views on TikTok and YouTube, millions of Americans are watching shows that feature Satan as a main character on Netflix and other streaming services, and the Satanic Temple has become one of the fastest growing religious organizations that the United States has ever seen.
Warning on Upcoming Disney+ Show About a Girl Carrying satan’s Baby The family-friendly entertainment organization MovieGuide is sounding the alarm about an upcoming Disney+ that features a teenage girl’s love affair with satan.
You Say You Want a Revival? We also see no evidence of a major revival in the End Times. If anything, we expect growing apostasy and more virulent rebellion against God. That is why Jesus asked rhetorically whether the Son of Man will find faith on the Earth when He comes again (Luke 18:8).
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astaroth1357 · 4 years
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The Demon Brothers got Hexed and now They're Babies. Good Luck, MC!
Lucifer
Both adorable and bossy at the same time.
If he wants something it has to be NOW or he'll fuss incessantly.
Attempts to order his brothers around still like they're his minions, but since none of them can form words very well it's just him assertively speaking near-gibberish in their general direction.
Unsurprisingly, his “orders” get completely ignored by everybody for once in his life, including his caretaker. Gets very frustrated when not listened to and will throw a mini-tantrum but will tire out very quickly and just take a nap wherever he's at.
Likes to try and boss MC around the most but it’s pretty easy to cave because he gets so dang giddy when someone finally does what he wants. Smiling baby Lucifer has to be one of the most precious sights in all the Devildom.
If you don’t think Diavolo is going to take it upon himself to act like his big brother through this whole thing, you’re wrong. The dude is loving this and will play with Luci all day if someone doesn’t step in to stop him.
After everyone is better he will demand that any and all pictures/videos of him get chucked into the sea. They won't be but, hey, he tried.
Mammon
Is there really any difference? 😆
Jokes aside, he's one of the clingest of the bunch and has to be held for a little bit every hour or else he gets grouchy.
Keeps putting shiny things in his onesie and ends up dragging them along behind him wherever he goes.
Pretty much will not share anything that's he's taken a liking to, be it toys, food, or people. The MC especially. He will try to physically drag his brothers away from what’s his if it comes down to it.
He's somehow everybody's favorite playmate and seems to know it too. If one of his brothers gets sad then he'll be right over to comfort them into playing again.
He's the only one who can wake up baby Luci from his naps without him getting too grouchy.
He's gonna sell a pretty penny on all the pics of his adorable little self. He also stole most of the footage of baby Lucifer playing with Diavolo to do the same. Hope the Grimm will be worth it when he finds out 💀
Leviathan 
Cries. So. Damn. Fast.
One of those skittish kids that scares pretty easily and doesn't feel very comfortable around new people. Will be clinging onto somebody at all times and standing behind the MC’s legs is a favorite hiding spot.
Oddly fascinated by toilets and seeing how much he can flush down them. If it fits in the bowl, it ain't safe. Someone keep an eye on Henry…
Absolutely loves bathtime. Few things on this planet can claim to be happier than a little Levi buried under some soap suds. His grin could power the Devildom AND Las Vegas with some left to spare.
His tail is juuust starting to grow. He bawled his eyes out for hours once when Belphie "accidentally" yanked it (the little shit…)
Mammon is lowkey his emotional support friend.
Will likely be mortified later by the sheer amount of his own figurines he tried teething on. Thankfully, he was usually stopped before causing lasting damage.
Satan
Lil'brat #1
Is he the sort of kid who will push buttons just to see the reaction? The answer is yes, yes he is.
Does he throw the most ungodly temper tantrums ever known to demon kind for seemingly no reason at all? Yes. Yes he does.
Is he probably the reason that manners aren't just enforced, but fucking inventing? Absolutely.
Will he quiet the fuck down the second someone shows him a cat; real, picture, or otherwise? Oh yes. Right away.
More or less best dealt with by giving him a tablet with cat videos. He’ll settle right in and coo at the screen for hours. Otherwise, their father have mercy on your patience (and breakables).
Will apologize for all the trouble he caused when the hex wears off… (but he remembers all of it and fucking relishes that he got the chance to be That. Nasty. with no long-term consequences. Good times…)
Asmodeus
That one kid who doesn't get the concept of stranger danger at all.
Super adorable and friendly but prone to wandering off and trying to make friends with anything that moves.
That includes bugs, Henry 2.0, Diavolo, Barbatos, the angels, Solomon, that guy down the street, his hungry looking hellhound… Any time he makes a new “friend” he has to excitedly show them to the MC like they’re his new favorite thing ever.
Basically the reason those leashed toddler backpacks were invented.
Can be easily distracted by his own reflection in a mirror. He'll watch himself in rapt suspense for way longer than he really should.
He and Mammon fight over shiny things. While Mammon just stockpiles them, Asmo will try to wear them as hats.
Is going to be incredibly pissed if there's not at least an entire album's worth of pictures of his little baby self when he returns to normal. It's a one-in-a-lifetime Devilgram opportunity here!
Beelzebub 
Will eat anything. Literally. Anything.
You think having practically no teeth will stop him? He has the jaw strength of a crocodile!
Can't be left alone in nearly any capacity because he will try a bite of whatever he gets his hands on. Tables, cushions, chairs, toys, remotes, nothing is safe...
Teething toys are a must for him, but he's going to go through a lot of them pretty quickly. Open up your wallet, MC, before he takes a bite out of that too.
Eats far too fast for his own good and gets food everywhere. It's best just to feed him without clothes on then hose him down afterward.
If he's not eating (or trying to eat) something then he's looking for cuddles. About the only thing that he doesn’t try taking a bite out of is MC, though it might be best to keep him fed so we don’t have to test that.
Doesn’t mind the photos, but might be a little disappointed that he doesn't remember tasting the couch… It always has reminded him of marshmallows...
Belphegor 
Is either the easiest child to deal with in the world or Lil'brat #2. There is no in-between.
One of those kids who will gladly put themselves to bed and sleep through a hurricane if left alone.
Is also lowkey pretty aware that this means there’s a lot less attention on him and he will cause mischief when bored.
Obsessed with "drawing" on walls. Mostly portraits(?) of either himself or Beel, but occasionally one looks like the MC. Wherever he keeps finding the markers is a complete mystery.
Will also instigate fights with his brothers. Takes Mammon's favorite toys, throws Satan's tablet, pulls Levi's tail, etc. Tries to look like all cute afterward but he knows what he did and so does everybody else, the stinker. 😖
Nap buddies with Lucifer and they can often be found sharing his, now oversized, cow-pillow together.
Afterwards, he'll enjoy hearing the stories of his reign of terror but also kind of misses having that great excuse to nap all day.
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soulless-strangers · 3 years
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Bubble bath
Caregivers oikawa and Iwa and little Ushijima
((Mentioned baby Kageyama))
🏐💜💙🐮
Oikawa was kneeling on the bathmat as he bucketed warm water over the tipped back head of Ushijima.
“Good boy.” He cooed, dark eyes meeting his with a light shine in them. “I told you I wouldn’t let any soap get in your eyes.”
The little returned his gaze to the bath water, his knees up to his chest.
“Thank you Mama.” He hummed quietly.
This was good. Washing his hair had been the perfect distraction while Iwaizumi washed his highland bull stuffie.
All previous attempts had resulted in tearful begging and pleading and as harsh as Oikawa could be, there was no way he could put his little though that.
“Can you face me baby and I’ll give your face a scrub?” The giant of a little nodded softly, eyes turning back to his caregiver as he shuffled himself around.
Bringing up a soft cloth that had been run under warm water (he was not going to dunk it in the soapy bathwater and risk tears) he began to wipe away the smudges of dirt from the days activities.
He and Tobio had slipped at the same time while he and Iwaizumi had been watching a movie, so the two of them took the littles into the back yard to let them play with a volleyball (seriously did these kids ever think about anything else?).
This, unfortunately, had resulted in both of them getting incredibly dirty. Iwa had bathed Tobio while Oikawa had gotten his bed room ready to let the littles nap and heated a bottle for the younger.
Tobio was, hopefully, sleeping peacefully while Iwa washed Ushijima’s stuffie and fixed him a sippy cup of warm chocolate milk.
“Sorry got all dirty Mama...” Ushijima’s eyes dropped to the edge of the tub, sniffling slightly as he raised a balled fist to scrub the tears from his eyes.
Carefully, Oikawa pulled the fist away from his face, smiling gently at the younger.
“Oh baby, don’t be sorry. Getting dirty is half the fun. Don’t be afraid to cry if you want though.” He placed the wet hand back into the water, not wanting Ushijima to rub soap into his own eyes and cause more tears.
He watched the little bottom lip begin to quiver, eyes falling back to his fingers he was fidgeting with.
“Mamas not mad?”
“Of course not sweetheart.” He hummed, swiping the cloth across the other boys cheek. “See? All clean. No harm done.”
Oikawa was very silently hoping that Highland was finished in the dryer so Ushijima could be put to bed. He knew breaking the littles routine would definitely upset him.
Toweled off and dry, Oikawa helped him into his soft pyjamas, a big soft cow onesie with button removable socks and mittens. Oikawa decided to leave them on.
“Mama? I is tired.” The little yawned, finally rubbing his eye with his mitten covered hand.
“How bout we go find Highland, get some choccy milk from Iwa and we’ll get you to bed with Tobio? How does that sound?”
“Mm s’good mama.” He mumbled, making uppie hands at the older.
“Hey baby come lean on mama and we’ll go to my room for a nap ok?” He hated that he couldn’t lift Ushijima.
Iwa could for a short period of time but he was about the only one.
Entering the room he was glad to find Tobio asleep, wrapped up in one of the weighted blankets and cuddling against Kyebear with their paci in their mouth. A half finished bottle of milk sat on the bed side table.
“Mama? Youse said I can have Highland?” Ushijima whined as he was tucked under a soft blanket.
“Did someone say Highland?” Iwa sung quietly from the doorway with a soft smile.
The little bought his hand up under his chin, making little grabby hands as an excited stim.
Oikawa let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding.
The stuffie was placed in his arms, Iwa helping to sit him back up as he handed the sippy cup to Oikawa.
“Careful. Don’t drink too much.” Oikawa cooed as Ushijima scarfed down the chocolate milk.
“Good boy.” Iwa hummed as he took the now empty sippy cup from the little and helped to settle him against the pillow again.
Oikawa stood, walking over to his desk to retrieve Ushijima’s black and white paci, carefully placing it in the littles mouth with a soft smile.
“Good night Baby.” He hummed, the sentence echoed by Iwa as the two slipped out of the room quietly, Ushijima’s eyes dipping closed as he snuggled against his bull stuffie.
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fluffy-papaya · 3 years
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reasons why the HWF will always be one of the funniest episodes to me:
1. “Hey guys, get dressed in some wrestling gear!” one dude shows up in naruto cosplay. another shows up in a flash onesie.
2. Cub keeps throwing milk buckets at people, insisting his friends are ‘the cream of the crop’
3. The source of one of the most infamous s7 clips, Grian’s “are you ready to RRRRRUMBLE?”
4. the whole premise behind it; like, okay, so this guy steals your pet cow and demands 64 diamonds (which you can easily provide.) do you a) pay the bribe and have your cow return safely? or b) contact your bestie the mafia boss and set up a wrestling tournament so you can pop some steroids and beat the kidnapper into the ground? (you win the fight but your cow still dies a couple of days later.)
5. “Are you ready to ru- ready to rumble?!” “I want a sandwich.”
6. yeah speaking of cub, he wasn’t gray anymore. hair dye? natural hair color is brown? who knows, not me!
7. please. please just watch the HWF episode, it is legit one of my favorite episodes from s7 ever
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specialmindz · 3 years
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“Mmm *POMP!* this some good milk, Snas,” said Papyrus, shuffling around in his brother’s makeshift backpack. It wasn’t very comfortable, but as long as he didn’t have to crawl…
“eh, i prefer hot chocolate myself,” replied Sans. “glad you like your milk baby bro, i was worried about how it’d do in the microwave cause’ of all the chemicals, but you’re not dead yet so…”
“Daddy say is okay to put mah super milk in da’ mikeywave…or is I baby guinea pig?” Papyrus narrowed his eyes in suspicion.
“guinea pigs are cute pap!”
“…”
Sans blew on his hot chocolate for what seemed like the sixth time. He didn’t put his drink in the microwave like Papyrus’s, he preferred to use boiled water as the cold weather of Snowdin usually cooled it off without him having to do anything.
Today though, they weren’t going to Snowdin, plans had changed.
Alphys had always had a messy workspace, but the Nursery, according to her, was in worse shape. FAR worse shape. She didn’t mind the broken toys scattered everywhere seeing as it wasn’t her room, but the fact that the toys came from the Dump meant they smelled terrible. Sans and the rest of the family were either nose-blind to it, or simply didn’t care, but Alphys couldn’t stand it. She complained weekly about the stench, claiming it was getting worse and worse, seeping from underneath the Nursery door and distracting her from work, but no one would do anything about it.
Today, SHE took the initiative and decided to spray the Nursery with every air freshener they had, making it impossible and even dangerous to sleep in the room; that meant that not only did they have to find a new place to sleep, but Baby Papyrus also missed his nap.
Not good.      
“You an idiot,” mumbled the cranky infant, unhappy to be a baby guinea pig.
“whatever.”
“Lazy idiot stink head with stupid broke gloves…”
“heh ha! they’re not broke pappy, that’s how they’re SUPPOSED to look. these are fingerless gloves,” explained Sans, hoping to laugh away his irritation. Papyrus wasn’t having it though.
“Your gloves dumb like you.”
“they’re not dumb! i think they make me look cool…”
“They make you look homeless. I half aspect you to be shaking a tin can around, asking for monies.”
“Screw you, Papyrus.”
“Is I your bindle, big Buther? You’s supposed to carry me on a stick…”
“SHUT UP, PAPYRUS.”
“Can you do da’ har-mon-ica? Pay a song for the baby.”
The young comedian quickened his pace towards the Resort Area. “i’ll pay you a beating, you keep mouthing off,” mumbled Sans under his breath.  
“Ooooh, Buther think he tough now cause’ he gots biker gloves! Nyeh heh heh, what gang you from, Snas? Pussies of Anarchy? Renegade Rejects?”
San didn’t reply, he merely pushed open the doors of the Resort and went inside, not wanting to travel all the way to Snowdin’s hotel or teleport whilst carrying his brother in a bag rather than his arms. He knew for a fact that anything touching his body would travel with him, but what about the things that weren’t? Or the things he wasn’t holding on to purposely?
It’s not like I’ve ever lost anything in my pockets when I take my shortcuts, but I still don’t feel comfortable with something so precious in such a flimsy bag…
“Harlem’s Asshats?”
Hm…maybe “precious” isn’t the right word to use for Pap.  
Sans grimaced as Papyrus continued to complain and come up with more insulting gang names. He himself was a complainer when HE didn’t get enough sleep, but Papyrus?
“Big-butted Bums of Bloomington!”
His brother REALLY sucked when he missed his nap. He was loud, angry, and mean. Babies weren’t supposed to miss their daily naps and baby bones already had hot tempers to begin with…
TA-TAP, TA-TAP!
The Receptionist, a monster with a giant hand in place of her head, tapped her red painted nails on the counter impatiently, a strange sight for those who weren’t used to seeing it. “Do you need a room you two?”
TA-TAP, TA-TAP!
“No, I needs a doctor cause’ Snas give me irradiated milk!” Papyrus tried to point his finger accusingly at his brother, but found it next to impossible in his current position, so instead he threw his bottle on the ground.
“NYEH!”
CAP, CAP!
It bounced along the tile floor, empty despite his whining, and rolled to a stop before a janitor, who kindly picked it up. “Ah-hawww, looks like you’ve got a fussy baby on your hands!” chuckled the employee, returning the bottle.
CAP, CAP, CAP!
“HAHAHAHA!”
“PAPYRUS! i’m so sorry sir-”
“Oh, don’t be, it’s what I get paid for after all! It’s best you get that little guy to bed though…”
“NOT TIRED!”
Sans took the bottle from the janitor and put it in his pocket. Even if his brother were telling the truth, he knew the Lying Font was still going to ACT tired, and a tired baby was a cranky baby. For Papyrus, a missed nap was all the excuse in the world to be a douche, and Sans would rather fork over 400g then listen to his crap.
Lucky for us, children get discounts.
TA-TAP, TA-TAP!
“STOP HEADBUTTING DA’ TABLE NAIL LADY! IF AZZY NOT ALLOWED TO, YOU NOT ALLOWED TO!”
“E-excuse me?”
“just ignore him, miss-”
“When Azzy be small like me, he used to headbutt the desk. You not remember Nail-Lady? You was all like, ‘STOP ATTACKING THE DESK GOAT-BABY!’ and Moo-Mom say, ‘HOW DARE YOU YELL AT MAH BABY LIKE DAT!?’ and then Fluffy Buns say ‘settle down now ladies, is not that serious,” said Papyrus, voice acting each line. He’d been doing that a lot as of late, trying to “perfect his mimicry for when he got big” and by extension, he ended up disturbing those unfortunate enough to hear him. Asgore’s loud booming voice coming from such a small baby was…eerie…and it was even worse when he decided to imitate Sans...
The receptionist doesn’t have a face, but I bet she’s as uncomfortable as I am right now.
How do I get bro to stop talking though?
“…Then you got all mad Nail-Lady and say ‘HE DO DIS ERYTIME HE HERE! WHY YOU CAN’T CONTROL YO’ KID? ERYBODY ELSE CONTROL THEIR KID! YOU THINK JUST CAUSE’ YOU THE KING YOU CAN DESTROY? NOT ERYBODY WICH LIKE YOU!”
“…I actually DO remember,” said the receptionist. “Someone, who used to do that. Yes…there was a small child with an entitled mother who used to headbutt and jump atop the furniture…”
Who was that?
“Yep! I’s there too with Chara, so I knows! You and the Moo Lady used to argue about discounts-”
“Oh my goodness, you’re right!” the woman suddenly remembered. “There was a woman who claimed she should only have to pay the regular 400g because you weren’t her child and THEN she got upset when I AGREED and asked you for 200g-”
“HOW YOU GONNA ASK A BABY FOR MONIES? BABIES SHOULD GET IN FREE! YOU DOESN’T EVEN GOTS CWIBS!”  
“That’s EXACTLY how it went, every single time. It was always the same argument.” The monster, who prided herself on her professionalism, could feel herself getting angry all over again, her old forgotten hatred bubbling to the surface. She couldn’t stand the Royal Family. The Entitled Mother, the Spinless Husband, the Destructive Child…and if she recalled, the human they adopted was an actual thief…
“Yep, and Chara was all like ‘don’t be a bitch, bitch’ and da’ Cow Lady say ‘I agwees, but I doesn’t ah-pea-ciate yo’ language my child,’ and Chara go ‘I was talking to youuuu-”
“hey pap-”
“Fluffy Buns smacked them right on the butt! It was funny.”
“Yes…Chara was their name…the thieving human who kept getting in trouble with security. They would go into other people’s rooms and take their things like it was okay and the mother-”
“She say, ‘Oh Chara just curious, you should be more patient wit yo’ customers! Da’ world of monsters be new to them ya’ know? They just a child…!”
“…”
Sans didn’t know how she was doing it, but he could have sworn he heard growling coming from the woman’s direction.
“ha ha…hey uh, bro? let’s just get us a room already, yeah? i’m sure the receptionist here is busy-”
“TWO WOOMS PEAS!” yelled the infant. “One for the baby and one for the Pussy of Anarchy.”
“damnit pap…!”
“Very well, that’ll be 400g then.”
Glaring over his shoulder, Sans forked over the money and headed to their room. “now bro, there are other people in this resort so try not to be a dick, alright? we need to be quiet-”
“WAIT SNAS!” the baby bones picked himself up out of the bag with his wingdings. “I gots to visit the fountain real quick.”
“Oh uh, please don’t urinate in the fountain,” said the receptionist raising a finger. “The rooms have toilets in them.”
“I’s not a gross peepee-baby Nail-Lady, don’t you know a cute widdle skelly when you sees one? I’s looking for coins-”
“Absolutely not!” cried the woman, her tone taking a sudden turn. “This fountain is a memorial to…someone. It is strictly forbidden to gather the coins within, read the sign!” The monster pointed at a sign that said “Stay Out of the Fountain.” Apparently, people were so desperate, they were stealing G from the memorial…
“I NEEDS EM’ TO PAY SNAS BACK!” yelled Papyrus, wondering how much 200g was.
“READ. THE. SIGN. THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE!” she replied, shouting just as loud. Clearly theft was a daily problem for her.
“heh heh, you don’t need to pay me back lil’ bro, thanks though.”
That was…unexpectedly sweet.
“I’s not a deadbeat big Buther…also, I can’t reads so dat sign don’t apply to me.”
“THAT’S NOT HOW THAT WORKS!”
“you do too know how to read, quit your lying pap,” said Sans chuckling.
“I’s not lying, I’s a baby and babies don’t read. Erybody knows that! Isn’t that right Nail- Lady?”
“I just told you what it said, get away from that fountain!”
“Babies also have poor memor-ies. I doesn’t remember what you said,” Papyrus used his wingdings to scoop up a handful of coins and deposited them into his onesie to count later. “I’s very sorry for da’ inco-venience.”
“PUT THOSE BACK OR I’LL HAVE TO ASK YOU TWO TO LEAVE!”
“uh, okay pappy this is getting serious, let’s just put the pretty coins back like the nice lady said…”
“Is serious? THEN WE SERIOUSLY WANT OUR MONIES BACK,” said Papyrus, angrily. Here he was being a good bae, paying back his big brother, (something babies did NOT have to do) and this big person wanted to yell at him?
CLEARLY, she was a baby-hater and didn’t deserve to have such cute guests staying at her gaudy hotel.
“We take back our monies and we go somewhere that ah-pea-ciates sweet babies such as ourselves. Your hotel ugly anyway…too bright, right Snas? We leave.”
“no no no, we don’t need to do that!” said Sans quickly in a panic.
“FINE, TAKE IT AND GO!”
WHAP!
The receptionist slammed the money down on the counter.
I’m so sick of serving thieves…
“wha-ho, lady! let’s just calm down alright? *sigh* geeze…” Sans scratched behind his skull. “why don’t we come to a compromise? that sound good?”
I CAN’T take Pappy to that inn in Snowdin again, I didn’t sleep at all last time!
The comedian winced, remembering the night he spent there with Papyrus. The infant didn’t like the snoring from the other guests in the room.
“Nyeh? Com-per-mize…? Waz dat?”
“it’s a negotiation,” explained Sans. “where arguing people get a little bit of what they want, so everyone’s happy…ish.”
TA-TAP! TA-TAP!
“Okay Snas, I do da’ com-per-mize cause’ I’s a good bae,” said Papyrus sweetly. Seemed he was done acting cranky for the day…or so Sans hoped.
“good boy, pappy! GOOD babies compromise allll the time.”
“No they don’t, but Imma make an ah-ception cause’ I doesn’t like the snoring baes in Snowdin. Remember them Snas? The snoring bunny baes?”
“heh heh, yep, iiiii remember.”
“You can’t tell a sweepy baby to shut the fuk up, cause’ they just babies, so we get no sweep and the Inn lady get all our monies for fee! Is a scam, I KNOWS it!”
“Put the coins back please,” said the receptionist, no longer interested in Papyrus’s stories.
“Kay’. Papyrus picked himself up out of the fountain and waddled over to the counter, his onesie jiggling with coins and leaving a wet trail behind him. I gots a good idea for a com-per-mize Nail-Lady.”
“I thought you were going to put the coins back?”
“Slow yo’ roll woman, we makes a commerize first-”
“compromise’ bro.”
Papyrus ignored him. “I’ll put the coins back like you say…and in return for being a good baby bones, I gets a fee room, kay’? Dat sound like a good commercialize?”  
“…No.”
“*pfft!* papyrus-”
“Why not Nail-Lady? It solve both our problems, yes? Why you so unreason-able?”
The receptionist sighed and hung her head, her energy for the day having been completely drained.
I forgot how terrible this infant was, all he does is talk and make things worse. Why is he even here? Doesn’t he have a mother and father to go home to?
Ugh, he’s still going...
“…Good babies get rewards Nail-Lady, is the law. Dat’s how we learns to be good people’s ya’ know? I do something good…then I gets a reward, then I be good again to get another reward. You see where I’s going with dis?”
“There’s a difference between a reward and a bribe, child-”
“I’s not a child, I’s a baby! How you gonna learn if you no listen? BIG people’s get bribes, BABIES get rewards-”
“bro, stop, it’s okay,” said Sans picking up his brother. “i’ll pay your way and if you really want to return the debt, you can pay me back with your OWN mon-”
“Except ugly babies like Snas, they get nothing.”
“…you know what? nevermind, you can sleep out here like the bum you’re destined to be." He put Papyrus back down.
“I can join your gang…?”
“no, we’re full.”
“Bums of Bloomington full?”
“yyyep.”
“Kick someone out.”
CA-CLACK!
The receptionist pressed the security button underneath her desk.
“why should i? you don’t have biker gloves and you’re mean.”
“Baby not mean! Also, I’s family and family comes first. Kick someone out.”
“no.”
CLANK, CLANK, CLANK!
The two boys stopped fighting and grew silent as a giant knight in black armor approached the counter.
“*Yawn* ………Is there a problem ma’am?”
“Yes, there is,” replied the receptionist. “That baby is stealing from the fountain…and apparently the other one is in a gang-”
“what? no i’m not! papyrus is lying!”
“Nope, is true all right. My big Buther a rebel! He drive his motorcycle around at night when is bedtime.”
“no i don’t, shut up papyrus!”
“……...Is this true?”
Sans gave the knight an irritated look, “why don’t you tell me? why don’t you tell me where i can ride a motorbike without filling the underground with carbon dioxide? why don’t you tell me where i can get one whose pedals i can even reach? where i can get one PERIOD-”    
“……...You don’t need to be a smartass.”
“…”
“………Please return the coins.”
“…”
“Why you gots so many ellipses in yo’ text Knight-Lady? You sweepy too?” The baby bones crawled over to the sleepy giant and gave her the coins in his onesie. “Here you go Heavy-Lady, now you can affords to sweep like us!”
“that’s very sweet, pappy-”
Papyrus turned to the receptionist, “NOW baby gets a fee room?”
“*sigh*”
Damnit bro…
“…No.”
“Nyeh? Why not? I WAS GOOD, GOD DAMNS IT!”
“Get out.”  
“NYEHHHHAAAAHHHH!!”
“papyrus, you don’t need to scream-”
KA-CHUR-GERGERGER!
Taking out a coin pouch, the knight poured some G onto the receptionist’s counter, “…400g right?”
“You don’t have to do that Knight Knight-”
“Yes, I do,” replied the armored monster, handing over the coins Papyrus gave her. “It’s a knight’s duty to help those in need…and we live in times where money is scarce…” She looked down at the skeletal children. “…Remember these words well…following the rules may make others happy and keep the peace, but if it comes at the cost of your or another person’s survival…ignore them.”
“…”
“…”
And with that, Knight Knight walked back to her post, leaving the receptionist alone with the two brothers.
The hand monster wasn’t angry anymore, in fact, she felt a bit guilty and embarrassed over her previous behavior. It was true that the coins in the fountain were people’s wishes…and it was part of her job to make sure people treated those wishes and the memorial with respect, but when looking at the big picture and thinking about WHY so many thieves were running about, well, it was clear who the bad guy was.
“I apologize for my previous behavior,” said the receptionist bowing low. “I’d forgotten that rules were made to help others, not act as bait for the desperate. There’s no point in a memorial if there’s no one left to honor it.”
How many people have starved to death for my job?
She winced and shook her head in an attempt to rid herself of such thoughts. What was done was done, all she could do now was change so it never happened again.
“Is okay Nail-Lady!” said Papyrus petting her back with his wingdings, “It’s your intentions dat count, not what you do.”
“that’s true. as long as you’re at least TRYING to do the right thing, you’re still a good person. mistakes are mistakes, ya’ know? you shouldn’t be punished for something you didn’t MEAN to do, ain’t that right pap?”
“Daz right big Buther! Now give us da’ key.”
“say please.”
“No.”
The woman handed the baby bones, who had taken the liberty of climbing onto the counter, the key to their room. “Please enjoy your stay.”
“YAAAASS! C’MON SNAS, IS TIME FOR YO’ NAP!”
“you mean it’s time for OUR nap, pappy.”
“NOT TIRED!”
As the boys headed to their room, the receptionist left her post and walked towards the fountain, removing the sign.
It was never put up again.
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monst · 3 years
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Wait. Did it have to be a disney song? If it has to be a disney song then I'd pick be a man from mulan 😝 the rest remains the same lol
You were walking aimlessly through the clothing section. You were incredibly bored, your friend said that this would be a quick trip but they were not, they just needed to return an item and Customer service absolutely needed to be hounded on this particular day. It was one hell of a line and you didn’t want any part in standing in it. You stopped to touch the plush pink udders of a cow onesie. Your attention from the onesie was caught by a tall man in green spandex and orange leg warmers.
Once he was out of your line of sight you continued your stoll. Passing by various articles of clothing you saw the famous outline of the most important mouse on earth. Next to Mickey were shirts with some of the Disney classics scenes printed in front of them. Bambi, Cinderella, Aladdin, The- “Ooo They have Mulan.” You smiled. With the movie now stuck in your head you began to visualize the scene to pass the time. It wasn’t long before you were streaming the movie soundtrack.
Your legs had taken you towards the toy section and a couple of poole noodles had caught your eye and it just so happened that the next song-
“Let's get down to business!” You began pool noodle in hand. A loud gasp stopped you from chanting the next line and you were met with excited brown eyes.
“To defeat the Huns!” He cheered while grabbing a pool noodle. You had accepted this random man’s challenge and held your noodle defensively “Did they send me daughters, When I asked for sons?”
He charged at you, floppy weapon in hand and thus your epic battle began. “You're the saddest bunch I ever met, But you can bet before we're through” You both grunted trying to get a good grip on the slippery poles. Your eyes glared into each other fiercely.
“Mister, I'll make a man out of you” You both ‘sang’ as you charged. Needless to say the both of you were having a blast and it seemed like one of the employees had a sense of humor as the song now played on the walmart speakers. You were panting and out of breath for the next couple lyrics as the two of you were now giving the shoppers a show. It was then that you had decided to drop your weapon and equip yourself with a foam sword and your sparring partner followed suit. It was nearing the end of the song and you were surrounded by a ring of people. You were all laughing out the lyrics in joy “Be a man! You must be swift as the coursing river, Be a man! With all the force of a great typhoon, Be a man! With all the strength of a raging fire! Mysterious as the dark side of the moooooonnnnnn”
You both fell ‘dead’ swords deep in the crook of your armpits. “...Seriously I leave you for a couple of minutes.” You heard your friend laugh. You turned to the man who did battle with you and noticed that he was already on his feet. His hand reached out to you and he pulled you up a grin on his face.
“Such wonderful youth! I am-” He posed, one eye closed in a wink “Might Guy! It is nice to meet you!”
You blinked owlishly at him and let a grin catch your lips. You looked to your friend. "Oh I like him, Sup I'm (Name)."
Some will say it was the start of a great friendship 😌
Might Guy! Naruto
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swiftmendeshoran · 3 years
Note
Do a imagine of this 😊
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I am not going to make this related to the video lol even though I just watched it again and laughed so hard. Happy Halloween everyone! 
WARNINGS: This is sort of smutty, but not too bad. Enjoy this little treat. Heheh.
You and your roommates had decided to attend the Halloween party at your university. You dressed up as a cowgirl, because let’s face it, you had everything in your closet besides the hat, and you were a broke college student. 
When you were all done getting ready, you piled into Rose’s car and headed to the party. You were nervous because they had other friends/ significant others to meet up with and you didn’t. You felt like they were going to ditch you and leave you alone with the drunk frat guys. 
You arrived at the party, which was already in full swing, and made your way to a table close to the bathrooms. Just as you had suspected after about 15 minutes, they ditched you for their significant others. You don’t even know why they invited you. They did this every time. 
But you wanted to get out, instead of spending the night studying for your History midterm. As your friends scurried off, you sat at the table, drinking punch, taking in the scenery. 
A guy walked up to you in an astronaut costume and introduced himself as James. After some conversation, he admitted he came up to you as a wingman for his best friend. 
“Hey! You want a cow?” James asked. 
James stepped to the side and another guy stepped besides him in an adorable cow onesie. “Baby moooo!” 
You laughed so hard, slapping your knee, spitting out your punch. 
James looked at the man, winked, and walked away. “Hi, I’m Niall,” he stuck out his hand. 
“(Y/N),” you said, returning the gesture. “That was, uh, quite the introduction.” 
Niall chuckled, putting his head down. “It was James’ idea. He was like it’s a great way to introduce yourself because well you’re a cowgirl and I’m, well...” 
“A cow,” you smirked. 
“Yeah,” Niall said, smirking. 
God, he was beautiful. 
“How come I’ve never seen you at these parties before?” you asked. 
“Oh, I just transferred here,” Niall told you. 
“Ah. How do you like it?”
“It’s ok. Luckily, I had James to guide me. We’ve been best friends since we were 8,” Niall said. 
“Aww. That’s sweet,” you smiled. 
“Not as sweet as you,” he booped you on the nose. 
You giggled, which caused Niall to clear his throat, adjusting himself in his costume. 
You bit your lip, looking into Niall’s eyes. 
He thought you were adorable and your laugh made him almost combust. “Not to be too forward, but do you want to get out of here?” 
You nodded, biting your lip again. 
Niall took your hand and drug you through the party, past the dance floor, and out the door. “My dorm is only a block away. We can walk it if you want.” 
“Sure,” you smiled. 
The night wasn’t too cold. You enjoyed the fresh air as you made your way to Niall’s dorm. The second you made your way inside his room, he pinned you up against the wall, kissing you. “Sweet as candy.” 
You moaned, your hands reaching up to cup his face. Niall chuckled, biting your bottom lip. You moaned even deeper and moved your hips into his. 
“Shit. You’ve got to stop that,” Niall said, still kissing you. 
“Sorry,” you giggled. 
He stopped kissing you, pulled his lips away, and stared at you. “You’re so adorable. Did you know that?” 
You blushed, biting your lip. 
Niall’s hand reached up and cupped your cheek. He smiled. “Did you want to move this to the bedroom?” 
“We barely know each other, Niall,” you said. 
“Oh, I’m sorry,” his head hung low. “We can just watch a movie if you want.” 
“No, no. It’s just-,” you bit your lip. “I haven’t done this in a while and I don’t know, I’m just nervous, I guess.” 
He looked up at you. “Whatever you want to do, pumpkin. I’m not going to force you.” 
You smiled at him. “You are not like other college guys, huh?” 
“What does that mean?” Niall asked. 
“You’re just respectful, that’s all,” you shrugged. 
Niall chuckled. “I try. Although bringing you back to my place on our first meeting could beg to differ.” 
“Most guys would have felt me up in the bathroom at the party so..” you shrugged. 
Niall shook his head. “That’s disgraceful.” 
“Yeah...” you bit your lip. You saw how hard Niall was in his costume. “I can help you with that, if you want.” 
“You don’t have to,” Niall shook his head. 
“I want to,” you smiled, slinking down. 
“Ok,” Niall said, unzipping his cow onesie. He didn’t have anything on under it and now you know why his bulge was so prominent. 
You grabbed his cock and he started laughing. You looked up at him, confused. “That’s a reaction I’ve never gotten before.” 
“No, no, I’m sorry,” he said. “I just thought of something, but it’s stupid. Go on.” 
You shook your head. Just as you were about to lip his tip, he laughed again. You sighed, letting go of his cock. “Tell me, Niall. Please.” 
“I just thought,” he laughed. “You know how if you ride someone it’s called cowgirl. Well you’re dressed as a cowgirl...” he couldn’t even finish what he was saying, he was laughing so hard. 
You were sitting on your knees, his hard cock in your face, Niall laughing above you. You stood up, pouting at him. 
“I’m sorry,” Niall said. 
“No, it’s fine, Niall. Don’t apologize,” you said. 
“Maybe we should try this another time,” he said. 
“Yeah, maybe,” you agreed. 
“How about that movie now?” Niall asked. 
“Sounds perfect,” you smiled. 
Taglist: @itsallyscorner @socialfake @niall-whoreans-whore
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@benice2trash
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Got u fam
I remember in the school library during lunch time trying to finish an essay (because I didn't have a home computer at the time) I hear some strange noises coming from in front of me and I decide to get up and see. A girl is playing animal mating videos on the computer in front of me telling to her friend next to her "when i'm mad at my family I play this at full volume"
It wasn't uncommon to see a group of kids, probs 10 naruto running through the lunch room. Probably twice during that hour.
So the cafeteria was also an auditorium. So there's a stage and lights and stuff. The place where you can control the lights is a small room upstairs. Idk how you get up there but you can see the little window to the room on the left side of the cafeteria. Anyways one kid figured out how to get up there and he was dumping popcorn from the window. Kids gathered underneath it like he was making cash rain.
Outside of the art class, they display some paintings on the wall. There was a tupac painting and someone stole it. They returned it after two weeks.
During a drama class we were supposed to act like soldiers dying or something. One kid was on the ground and someone came and took a shoe off his foot and started running away.
We were reading Julius Caesar in our english class and afterwards we got to watch a movie and one girl was acting disappointed and said "man I thought Caesar would be hot"
Also speaking of Shakespeare, lots of jokes about Caesar getting shanked. Also I usually have a working title for my essay so I don't lose it on a computer. Accidentally forgot to change it once before I hand it in so my Othello essay remained titled "art thou feeling it now Mr. Krabs?"
One kid comes to school in his pajamas everyday. It was a uniform school but he'd always come in a cow onesie. Or an adventure time blanket. Anyways he was smart.
One guy was selling USB p*rn in class casually. He was very very weird.
There was also a gambling problem in the school. There was an announcement about it. And it was happening while some kids were gambling in the library.
There was a kid who lived for controversy. Those edgy meme bros or whatever. You ever seen people get so mad over the argument if its okay to pee in the shower? All his power.
That's all I could remember off of my head! Hope you found them somewhat amusing.
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Once Bitten, Twice Stupid prt.13
Keith came out the shower doing his best drowned rat expression to date. With the towel around his shoulders, Lance wondered if Keith was protecting his neck, or preventing his shirt from soaking through. Having already showered, Lance had a glass of blood wine in one hand, and his phone in the other, dinner plans having gone out the window while he was busy playing with Keith
“Do you want the good news, or the bad news?”
Keith crossed his arms, Lance having to stomp down his compulsion to go dry the younger males hair off with a towel
“What?”
“Well, remember my friends from the other night, yeah, Hunk’s going to be here in about 20 minutes to pick us up”
“I’m not going”
“You don’t even know where we’re headed to”
“I don’t care. We’re not going”
It didn’t escape Lance that “I” had turned to “we”. He figured the hunter wouldn’t trust him to go out alone, and if he hadn’t been totally awol from his normal life he would have been turning down the invitation for some serious self pampering time
“Sorry, but you see, when my friends want to hang out, I don’t turn them down. You need to go get changed into something more bar appropriate”
“We’re not going. We haven’t finished talking. You turned me, and I need to know more”
With the number of times Keith had accused him, Lance felt like he’d know Keith far longer than a week and a bit... God, he couldn’t even remember if it had been a week, Keith’s idiocy was spreading
“And I hear I was thinking you’d finally gotten a clue. We’re going, because I’m invited. I’ll go on my own if I have to, but I had the feeling you’d freak out and think your prey was running away”
Keith’s emotions flickered across his face, obviously arguing mentally about the fact he couldn’t say no, and nor did he have the power to stop Lance
“Fine, but only so I can make sure you don’t turn anyone else. If you so much look like you’re going to bite someone, I will decapitate you”
“Excellent. I think I should have something in wardrobe that’ll fit. I’m guessing you like black on black”
“What’s wrong with my clothes?”
“You’re wearing a black onesie. Some people might be into that, but at a bar, that suit’s a crime against fashion”
“It’s not made to be fashionable”
“No, it’s made so you can be all “bump in the night”. Blargh. Go change already”
Keith told Lance at least several times that wearing his clothes had been forced upon him. Lance wasn’t sure why, when Keith had chosen his own wardrobe out of what was available. In ripped skinny legged black jeans and a black silk button up, Keith looked passable. Lance chalking up the weird sensation of wanting to pat Keith’s butt to the fact he too was recovering from being poisoned. Keith was soooo not his type, never mind the fact the guy was a freakin’ human, Keith hated him with a passion. Nope. Keith didn’t look good in his clothes, nor would he look better out of them. Lance was just... going through a lot. That was it. He was not getting suckered in by those piercing purple eyes, or the way Keith’s collarbones peaked out of the shirt. The blood in his body had enough to deal with, without it deciding it needed to make a trip down south over absolutely nothing.
Leaving Blue feeding her face on wet food, Lance headed for the door, back tracking to grab Keith by the wrist and drag him along behind him. Keith was starting to object all over again, but Lance wasn’t having it. If he had to socialise around drunks, then the punishment should be shared by Keith for being so goddamn hot and stupid... mostly stupid with a dash of stupidly hot sprinkled on top, kind of like unwanted chilli flakes. Lance was feeling pretty confident in his own outfit, blue jeans, white shirts and cropped tan jacket, but Keith had one upped him without even trying. Maybe Keith would get laid and lose some of his prickliness? The anger loaf needed to let that anger go, and turn into that beautiful emo butterfly hidden inside his cocoon of douchery. Towing Keith out the house, Lance left the alarm off in case Shiro came back. Explaining Keith’s presence seemed a hard enough challenge as it was, explaining why Shiro was breaking into his house... that was a whole other kettle of fish.
*
Lance had been lied too. There was no bar, they were in fact in Platt, running a rehearsal of Hunk’s date with Shay on the weekend. Picking up Pidge, she’d thrown herself into the back of the car, hand narrowly missing Lance’s junk in her rush. Oogling Keith, Pidge had elbowed him as she buckled herself in, all Lance could do was offer a shrug. Hunk’d already been shocked enough for the three of them, Lance lying his arse off saying Keith had offered to stay a few days and help Lance take photos of his house as he was thinking of repainting. The photos were for the online lab thingo where you could upload your rooms and pick colours there. Yep, those were the words he used too, technology was forever changing and he openly admitted he missed the days before social media... other than the cat videos and memes.
With Keith having no cash, Lance paid. Choosing gold class tickets meant the food was included, and the seating private. The hunter looked spooked by human interaction, Lance ordering steak dinners for the pair of them because damn if he wasn’t in the mood for some budget dead cow. Buying the biggest coke they had, Lance enjoyed the fact that the mix ratio was whack with more syrup than soda water, the straw ending up chewed on before they’d even made it into the screening room. Lance wasn’t sure about the movie selection but with Hunk and Shay going to see the one rom-com playing, Lance steered the group away from buying tickets for it so his bestie and Shay could enjoy seeing it for the first together.
Taking their seats, Lance wound up between Pidge and Keith. Pidge immediately started playing with the chair remote, and Keith sighed in annoyance. Leaning in, Lance kind of felt bad that they hadn’t wound up at a bar. Keith would have been able to have a few drinks and kick back, then find someone to take to the bathroom and work that aggression out. Just because he hadn’t done the do, didn’t mean Keith wasn’t a seasoned professional
“I’m sorry. I didn’t know we were going to see a movie”
“Whatever”
“I’m serious. I didn’t know. I would have dressed warmer if I did, and would have insisted you put a jacket on”
“I’m not a kid”
“I know you’re not. I just feel bad. I was hoping you’d be able to relax a little...”
“I don’t want to talk to you anymore”
“Okay, but I really am sorry”
When dinner came out, Keith poked at until he finally gave in, pretty much wolfing it down, half an hour later Lance had to excuse himself to the bathroom, finding Keith gone when he returned. Taking his seat beside Pidge, Lance leaned in
“What happened to Keith?”
“He said he needed the bathroom. Didn’t you see him?”
“No. How long ago did he leave?”
“Not long after you... Dude, what’s your deal with him?”
“My what?”
“Your deal. What’s he still doing here?”
“I asked him to take some photos of the house for me”
Pidge crossed her arms
“If you’re going to lie, at least make it convincing”
“Who said I’m lying?”
“You did. I know you, and I know when you’re lying. Something’s off with Keith, and you’re acting really weird”
“I’m not acting weird”
“Are you two dating? Is that why you’re being weird? You feel like you can’t talk to us...”
“No! No, no, no, no, no... ewww. No. I’m not dating him, he’s a stranger”
“A stranger you bring to a movie night with your best friends”
“It was either leave him the house or bring him with me”
“So he’s staying with you, like, staying staying?”
“Only for tonight. Shiro’s going to pick him up. I’m thinking of repainting the living room closer to its original colours, and I figured having a fresh set of photos would work”
“Why didn’t you ask me?”
Pidge’s words went right over his head, before looping back and slapping him in the face. Pidge had had her feathers ruffled by Keith “taking” what would have been her “job”
“Because, my Pidgeon legged friend, you would start hunting for ghosts in my house, then try to steal Blue as you left”
“You’re dodging the question”
“I’m not dodging the question. I only asked him because he’s a professional. You’re still my number one tech guru. I’m sorry I’ve been sick and haven’t been able to hang out, but I’ve missed my gremlin. No one can replace my little anger muffin”
“You’re a wanker”
“So I’ve been told”
“Has your cold when passed? You still look pale”
“Yep. Clean bill of health from the doctor. Just the usual take it easy for the next few days, fluids, sleep, platonic dates with your best friends, the usual post cold instructions”
“I’m still shocked you’ve got Keith staying with you”
“I’m shocked too. But I keep telling myself it’s only for a few days and soon it’ll all be over”
“Dude, he was wearing your clothes”
“And?”
“Lance, you know I’d never judge you for your sexuality...”
Lance laughed, him and Keith simply too ridiculous to even go there
“It’s definitely not like that”
“Are you sure? I mean... I’ve never seen you like this...”
“What? Invaded by a photographer?”
“No, not like that... I mean... like, he’s wearing your clothes, staying at your house... it’s not like you”
“Keith didn’t have any clothes that weren’t a crime against fashion, or acceptable at a bar, which I totally thought we were going to, thanks to a certain someone. Nah, he’s just staying a couple of days then Shiro is going to pick him back up and that’s that”
“Something still feels off”
“Pidge, I promise I’m okay, and I promise Keith and I aren’t in some whirlwind romance, or whatever that brain of yours has thought up. I’m actually pretty sure he hates me, if that makes you feel any better”
“Nope. It just makes it weirder... Should we be worried that he hasn’t come back?”
“Nah, I’ll go see if I can find him. Dude’s got the social aptitude of a rockmelon. He probably peopled himself out and is having a sulk”
“If you say so. Now go away, I’ve already missed part of this riveting plot”
The plot wasn’t riveting. It was badly thought through and designed for the masses. Like most things...
Keith wasn’t in the cinemas entrance hall, nor the bathroom, Lance heading outside to search for him. Not at the front of the cinema, Lance was starting to get pretty annoyed with his missing idiot. The last place left to check was the parking lot, where he found said idiot cornered by three men. Great... just... great. He took his eyes off him for two minutes and he’d already wandered off into trouble. Walking over to stand just short of the three strangers, Lance eyes Keith who had his arms crossed, scowling at the group
“Heya, fellas. Something wrong here?”
“Who the fuck are you?”
“You know, just a concerned citizen. You’ve got my friend cornered, so if you could just see it in your hearts to let him go...”
Lance stepped back, escaping being hit in the face as the stranger bared his teeth. What the fuck?! Was Keith dense as fuck? Or did he think he had the skill to take on three idiots
“Your wallet or you life”
“Seeing you’re getting neither, I suggest you run along home”
“What did you say to me?!”
They hadn’t even had to go to bar to find trash. Lance sighed as he pulled out his phone
“Well, we are living in the age of technology. This miraculous little device lets me call the police when people like you start messing with people”
“You won’t get the chance”
“We’ll see”
Avoiding being attacked was laughable. His attackers had like zero grace, they must instead rely on numbers to look “intimidating”. Each swing that didn’t connect made them madder, their “leader” pulling out a small blade, as Lance danced around them. Putting the phone to his ear, he made as if he was calling the police and not his home phone
“I’m going to kill you...”
Raising his pointer to his lips, Lance hushed the man
“Didn’t anyone teach you its rude to interrupt someone on a phone call?”
If someone was watching, the would have found the way the three morons were falling over each other hilarious
“Yes, hi, I’d like to report an attempted robbery at the front of Platt Pictures. There’s three guys that have bailed up two men...”
Dropping down to dodge the punch thrown at his face, Lance swept the leg of the leader, snatching his blade out his hand as the man’s eyes widened for the millisecond as he fell
“Yep. There still here... I’ll wait. You guys should probably run if you’re going to. Cops are on their way”
The look in the leaders eyes was something feral, spitting like it made him cool, the man wiped his mouth
“I’ll get you for this”
“I’ll be waiting, but I won’t be holding my breath. Also, I’ll be keeping hold of this blade of yours. Evidence and all that. It’s amazing this fingerprint technology...”
“Forget it, lets scram!”
When the leaders two goons split, the man pushed himself up, running off like the coward he was. Lance giving them a little wave as they did. Ending the call to his house, Lance slipped his phone back in his pocket, before holding out the blade to Keith
“Here, a souvenir of our time together”
“I could have handled that”
Lance rolled his eyes
“Never said you couldn’t. Anyway, take it. You seem to like knives and I’ve got no use for it”
Keith frowned at the offered knife
“But the police...”
“Aren’t coming. Let’s just say I have a job where I need to keep my name squeaky clean”
“What the hell?!”
Lance sighed at Keith
“What? Do you want me to call them? I totally can, I remember all their facial features”
“You didn’t do me a favour...”
“Never said I did. Oh, you totally skipped out on movie night. Do I want to ask why you’re not inside pretending to be scared like everyone else”
“The movie was shit”
“Finally, something we can agree on. But, Hunk and Pidge are trying to be friendly with you, so leaving is kind of a dick move”
“They don’t even like me”
“They might if you’re not out here hiding. Also, Pidge thinks we’re dating, so come on darling, we’ve got a movie to finish”
Lance took Keith by the wrist. Socialising wasn’t about to kill him
“What the fuck is wrong with you?”
Dragging Keith’s along, Lance spoke as they walked
“Well, that’s a long story. You see a long time ago a little boy was turned into a vampire. He grew up to become a lawyer, living as human like as he could, as he tried his hardest to give back to humanity so no other little kids got hurt. He never fed from a single person, took a lover, or like harmed any one more than what you just saw... You could say things were going well for him and he was happy. That was until two hunters crashed into his little corner of the world. He was forced to drink blood from an actual person for the first time in his life. Which upset him, because he felt he’d lost a little of the humanity he wanted. Now he’s trying his hardest for a stranger who wants him dead, and refuses to listen to him, because he’s some disgusting, revolting, beast that deserves that’s not even fit to be on the bottom of your shoe”
“That’s just it, why are you trying?”
“I don’t know, and that’s what’s getting under my skin”
Dragging Keith the whole back to their seats, they got there in time for the heroic ending where the main character saved the day. Hunk was sobbing, Pidge had gotten herself some skittles and was attempting to catch them in her mouth as she made a mess around her. Seeing they’d mostly missed the film, he and Keith remained standing there until the credits started and Pidge called “time to bail”. Ditching holding Keith’s wrist, because he’d honestly forgotten he had, Lance wrapped his arm around Hunk’s waist
“Good movie?”
“She was so brave...”
“I know, man”
Pidge cuddled up to his side until Lance looped his other arm around her
“What did you think?”
“It sucked. There were so many plot holes. I want my money back”
“Aw, never mind Pidgeon. It’s over now”
“That’s 133 minutes of my life I am never going to get back. You and Keith are arseholes. You missed most of the film!”
“Are we arseholes, or are you cranky we escaped?”
“You’re both definitely arseholes”
“Now, to be fair, Keith hit his people limit of the day. You’d never know, for all his conversational skills, but he’s a lot like you, Pidgeroonie. He gets very tired of people fast, and cannot do the brain without the coffee”
“That’s because people fucking suck!”
Pidge’s loudness caused the people walking near them to stare, staring was awkward forever one involved, Lance didn’t want the night to end awkwardly
“Okay, that’s enough exposure to the public for one night. Why don’t we grab something and head home? I’ll even pay”
“Yay! I want a super sized slushie. I should have thought of it sooner. I wonder if that slushie place with the weird flavours is still open”
Hunk groaned
“You’re making me do city driving?”
“Dude, relax. It’s night time, meaning there aren’t as many people on the road. Consider it practice for your date”
Hunk blushed, Lance laughing happily
“Don’t be mean to him, I’ll drive. Pidge, you’re in directions. Hunk, music, naturally, Keith, you get to sit in the back with Pidge and make sure she doesn’t get up too much mischief”
“What? Why?”
“Because I said so”
*
Keith opted to stay in the car and be a buzz killer as the three of them rushed to the slushie store. Minutes from closing, they were those annoying customers that all retail staff dread. Pidge was in heaven as she eyed the walls of flavour, Lance paying and limiting her to two without added energy drink. Hunk went for bubblegum flavour, Lance for strawberry. Keith hadn’t come in, but part of Lance didn’t want him feeling left out. With all the scowling faces Keith had pulled since they’d met, lemon was ruled out as a potential flavour, instead he went for iced coffee labeled as being lactose free. Keith might not be the nicest person in the world, but that didn’t mean Lance was going to be a douche over something Keith couldn’t control. He knew the man liked coffee, so it was the most logical choice. Pidge ended up unable to decide. One abomination made of orange, pineapple and mango, the second strawberry, bubblegum and coke. Making sure he’d left the woman behind the counter a very generous tip, Lance ushered Pidge and Hunk back to Hunk’s car, a little proud of himself when he got Keith’s door open with his foot in the door handle. Glaring up at him, Lance beamed in pride
“I got you one”
“I don’t need one”
“Yes, you did. It’s iced coffee, lactose free. Consider it an apology for venting on you earlier, if you need an excuse to take it”
Handing Keith the drink, Keith eyed it in suspicion
“Dude, it’s fine. Legit went from the machine to the cup then out to you. Pinky swear and all that. If you don’t want to drink it, I won’t get offended. I just thought it’d be nice to include you”
“Whatever. Thanks and stuff”
“You’re welcome. Let’s get you back home away from all these people so you can take a nap”
Keith’s expression soured, Lance was sure he was going to have the iced coffee slushy thrown at him, so shut the door quickly. Keith wouldn’t be a big enough douche to ruin Hunk’s interior. Hunk was a human, someone Keith was supposed to protect, meaning hurting his feelings had to go against whatever code hunters were bound to. Being caught up in everything going on, Matt came to his mind as Lance opened the driver’s door, his heart sinking. He hadn’t thought about Matt all night. Pidge had probably spent the whole night missing her brother and wishing it was him at the movies with them instead of Keith. He didn’t want to seem down, but it was hard to perk himself up now that he’d remembered he didn’t know how to act around Pidge. Climbing into Hunk’s car only made his heart ache more as Pidge and Hunk bickered over her flavour combinations. There was a code of privacy within VOLTRON, so he couldn’t enquire into Matt’s status. He couldn’t do anything to help Pidge with her Matt situation except for maybe confirm he was alive, which Shiro had already confirmed. Goddamn Shiro. He was ruining his night and the man wasn’t even here.
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stevestonbike · 3 years
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When you can get outside, GO!
Oct 31 was sunny and dry here.  Yes single digit (C) temperatures, but that is what layers are for.  My test is if I can stand comfortably outside in the gear not moving much it is just right for riding.  The moving air cools you just the right amount for the work you are doing.  Three layers on top with a backup shell in my pocket just in case.  I almost needed it. My thick tights and booties and heavier gloves completed the ensemble.
I did a loop around Flatmond then up into Vancouver zig zagging through the city to get to UBC for the return dash downhill. 
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 67 km at just over 24 kph.  Cool air is thicker and all those layers are less aero so that is my excuse.  On the same route in summer I am over 25 kph comfortably.
There were many riders out. I passed some and I got passed a few times.  Once by a guy in a Cow onesie.  It was Halloween. His tail flapped around at 35 kph.  I would not have worn that just from the risk of getting it caught in the spokes.  Yikes!  Hey embarrassment is not an issue once you have paraded around all year in Spandex.
That closes out October.  I am 685 km from 6000.  That is within striking distance.  If I do just a little bit better than last year I will be there.  I am not going to commit and jinx the whole thing.
The fit bit is silly.  I think I have figured out how it calculates resting heart rate.  It takes an average of your pulse overnight.  For example it says my current Resting heart rate is 60. But if I look at the pulse chart from last night the minimum is 52.  The “technical” definition is for a pulse seated calm and awake.  I suspect they have a “study” showing a correlation, but it is not valid from a rigorous perspective.
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Rewatching KHR eps 27-33 and I have things to say
WARNING: Spoilers for literally the entire series. These are my first immediate thoughts. Can’t remember if there’s explanations for these things coming up, idk. In that case I will be pleasantly surprised when I get to those eps again.
·         Hibari chooses his own grade? How old is this kid
·         Has defo cherry blossom PTSD
·         Like it puts him off now
·         Shame baby
·         For how dumb Tsuna is, hes the only one who can discern Reborn’s disguises
·         Where would Enma we during this time  
·         My baby did not deserve this
·         MY baby needs screen time
·         They literally made an episode about Tsuna having to hide a body
·         And everyone’s so nonchalant about the corpse
·         Like wtf they’re 14 arent they?
·         Yamamoto: Calm down, you don’t remember anything, right? ;)
·         Gokudera: let me bomb the corpse just to make sure
·         Reborn: a doctor can help revive this guy defo
·         Shamal: I SPECILIASE IN THE LIVING. BYE
·         XD
·         Reborn: invites Hibari over because he’s the got-to body disposer
·         This brings up so many questions
·         But actually not
·         Tsuna puts him in a closet
·         A closet he’s luckily out of
·         Very important question: What does Lambo and I-Pin do when they get switched to the future???
·         Like, do Lambo and I-Pin actually know about whats happening in the future in real time?
·         Hana needs more screen time
·         Cant remember, but I think she joined vongolo later??
·         But Teen Hana likes Adult Lambo, and Baby I-Pin likes Teen Hibari
·         What a series
·         Adult Lambo still has a cow onesie confirmed
·         Adult Lambo in Baby Lambo’s body is the most disturbing thing about him
·         HE STAYED LIKE THAT FOR A WEEK?
·         BABY LAMBO WAS IN ADULT LAMBO’s BODY IN THE FUTURE FOR A WEEK?
·         I need to know what happened
·         What did he do
·         What did Vongolo do
·         Was like Spanner and everyone there like where are we in the timeline?
·         Did he fight in the future?
·         Did he meet his boxed animal?
·         Guys seriously
·         ‘Lambo was returned to the Bovino family’
·         Im sorry what
·         I-Pin and Bianci having their own empowering female squad is what I live for
·         Reborn inviting Nana to Mafialand is so sweet tbh
·         ENTER CONONELLO
·         So is maggot ‘kura’? ‘Coora’, ‘cura’? I know Japanese doesn’t work like that but asking for a friend
·         Reborn: ‘We were born and raised in the same place’
·         What an interesting way to state it
·         “Former member of the Italian naval sub attack force comsubin”
·         “Tsuna’s my toy – I mean, student”
·         “WARNING, ENEMY ATTACKING” Yamamoto: “Is an event starting?”
·         SKULL ENTERS THE PICTURE
·         The arcobaleno are my adopted kids yall
·         Skull is the Stig confirmed
·         I LOVE THE OCTOPUS
·         Skull is a dog for his famiglia, Karkassa
·         Karkassa sounds like carcass
·         Appropriate  
·         Tsuna cant swim
·         SHameeee
·         Actually, lets not talk about the pool episode
·         That whole thing was a nightmare
·         And after the ‘pool’ episode, was the mandatory ‘beach’ episode
·         The senior lifegaurds deserve death
·         They’re also literally wearing speedos
·         Quite flat I’d say
·         LeTs SwIm ArOuNd ThE iSlAnD
·         I swear that was in Assasination Classroom too
·         They legit tried to drown Gokudera
·         I swear this series
·         Actually, I swear Reborn just pays everyone to be a dick to Tsuna
·         Hibari just wants the $$$
·         “Bananas or death” – Gokudera. Beautiful reference
·         When does this fighting in his underwear thing finally stop???
·         Please
·         Hibari has a soft spot for I-Pin
·         And that concludes s1
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