#the fact that my body is still going despite.... everything is a miracle | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

choochooboss · 2 months

Text

Introducing your station master & Magma event host!

Since there's already a lot of passengers visiting this station and I haven't spared much time to get to know my fellow submas fans over Tumbrl yet, an introduction would be in place!

I'm Jun, nice to meet you! *offers a hand for for a shake* I am a devoted submas artist & a monthly Magma event host! I go by ChooChooBoss everywhere (Twitter/Bsky/Twitch/Ko-Fi)!

This will be a long post! I will write a short intro as well which you can just skim through but here is a more in depth view how I got into submas, my other interests and life in general, in case you'd wish to know more about your conductor on this silly train!

How did I get into submas in the first place?

PLA. I met this certain mysterious & cool fellow time traveler and got curious! After the cave scene I went to read his Wiki, found out about Emmet, and... yeah. The emotional impact blasted me right out of a miserable cycle I was going through back then and set my soul on fire!! A month later I set up my first art account on Twitter, and the rest is history. They've become my greatest source of strength and inspiration and I enjoy drawing them every single day!

I love both twins very much! I tend to vibe with Ingo a little more than Emmet, but I draw Emmet more. People say I remind of butler Ingo the most, hehe. I certainly don't mind because I'm a big fan of butlermas!! In fact I got into submas & started playing Pokémon Masters EX in April 2022, a week before butler Ingo banner rolled in, so they truly got a special place in my heart ahah! (pssst draw more butlermas for me pls pls pls-)

However I don't draw warden Ingo as much as I would like to. I still get pretty emotional over his fate ahah, I can't draw him without a single tear! This sweet & kind man leading a good life and being an inspiration to others has been torn from literally everything he had for seemingly no reason apart from his name, clothes and the muscle memory and even those are barely intact. It seems like a miracle he's still standing and breathing after put through everything judging by the wear and tear on his uniform and body. Despite all that he carries a positive attitude, assists everyone in need, and does his best to help people and pokémon understand each other, unconditionally... Oh, my face is wet again...

My other interests besides submas?

Monster Hunter! Zelda! Genshin Impact! Super Mario! Trine! Crash Team Racing! And many many more! My favourite genres are platformers, kart racers, and action games, with a side of rhythm games. I'm a big fan of co-op games! I also watch my sis play JRPGs!

Monster Hunter is the dearest to me out of all. I've been hunting for well over a decade starting from MHFU. The games have charmed me with their incredibly satisfying combat system, world building, creature design, great attention to detail, character customisation and the games being nearly fully co-op!!

Other things I do:

Pokémon is practically the only turn-based game I enjoy, mainly because of the characters and collection aspect. However!! I adore Pokémon Colosseum (the first pkmn game I ever played!) and it's double battle focus, so The Indigo Disc has been a delight after the long starvation for double battles, coming up with different combinations makes the battles much more fun to me!!... I sound like Emmet here do I ahahah! We also share the fact we are both left-handed!

Shuffle dancing, daily pull-ups, and expanding my ever growing VGM collection! I also enjoy traveling and taking photos to keep as a diary! I've played piano in a music school for 9 years, and I can also play kalimba. I've done casual boxing, gymnastics, horse riding and medieval swordfighting. I used to read comics/manga and watch movies and anime but nowadays I barely do that, I just rather use that time for drawing instead of just sitting and watching, unless I have company!

I share the apartment with my anxious brother and our two sweet female cats, Laku (11, stubborn and cuddly) and Kalevi (21, demanding and full of love) in a city center. My parents are both entrepreneurs and run a farm in the countryside & I have 4 siblings with me as the middle kid!

Where can you meet me?

I am a game artist by profession, with 4 yrs of studies and roughly 7 years of EXP in the field doing game art, UI design, character/prop design, in mobile games as well as PC titles, 2D and 3D. At the moment I am looking for work; I keep up the motivation and learn new skills by running my art accounts while looking for new opportunities.

I hail from the land of darkness, snow, salmiakki, metalheads and renownly reserved people, Finland! (UTC+2)

Despite having my roots here I am pretty much the opposite of a typical Finn in almost every sense ahah! I'm a small guy who's not afraid talking to strangers and laughs a lot. And I dislike coffee for the contrary, it's very popular amongst finns.

With the inspiration from submas I've finally stepped into the world of cosplay so you can usually meet this small and excitable Ingo in the biggest local conventions, Desucon and Tracon! Come say hi!

About my social battery:

I'm both social and socially anxious ahah! I love making new friends and talking to all sorts of people and writing comments, and gathering together with my mutuals to do cool stuff together! However my social battery is very small... I often struggle with my AD(H)D and anxiety issues, so my replies can be extremely slow. I'm easily overwhelmed when life gets busy and I deal with it by withdrawing to minimise the the stimuli and then sorting my stuff out one by one. This is a frustrating shortcoming, but I'm working hard to find a balance I can maintain without getting exhausted. Please be patient with me! If you don't hear from me in a while, please don't take it personally! In fact, it makes me really happy if you contact me, for any purpose!

Which pronouns do I go with?

I go by they/them! I am also aroace, so if I appear to show any sort of romantic interest, it's definitely not that. I love meeting new people and am quite interested in people in general so I'm excited to get to know you better, but the thing is... I have been confusing people on several occassions for saying things that could be taken as flirting. I am terribly sorry for that, that's just the way I show how I care!

I don't really identify myself by any specific gender either, but rather by my roles or interests (Magma host, submas fan, game artist etc.). Submas encouraged me to enjoy dressing formally even if I'm just sitting at home, because I love formal clothing in general and wearing them makes me feel confident and stand taller! I usually wear collar shirts and black or white slacks.

More about my AD(H)D:

I don't have an official diagnosis but deal with the same problems as AD(H)D people do; poor work memory, dissociation, hyperfocus (drawing and people), sleep deprivation, impulsiveness (juggling too many things and going with the wind), getting sensory/information overloads, and feeling like I don't fit in. I figured it out after I finished school & lost my job for that I am unable to handle big tasks without anyone giving me directions. It has taken a while but I've figured out things that help me manage my daily life as well as have a medication that mainly boosts my capability to get things started which is another great struggle ahah.

How do I manage to keep myself on track?

I use a Pomodoro timer to keep up a good flow and remember to take breaks! This is what I use the most:

I should set it up on my tablet as well. I think it's really cool to see how many hours I have actually put into drawing! Last year I clocked in well over 3k hours, ahaha!

How to catch me?

Right now I have great difficulty managing replies, but usually you can reach me by DMs! I check Discord and Twitter the most often! However I must ask you to respect my current DNI status. It means I am really overwhelmed so I wish nobody comes asking for my attention until it has been lifted, unless it's really necessary. I really love talking to you all but I also have to accept and deal with my own limits strictly like this or it won't work out.

What am I working on at the moment?

Besides the holiday set I have several short comics under works as well as one big comic (100+ pages!). That one is my personal greatest goal! I started working on it in June 2022 and I have currently 40+ pages sketched and 60+ thumbnailed.

I was afraid of starting any comic projects before submas, but the sheer excitement over them carried me over that personal wall ahah!

The story's beginning and end are looking good and somewhat functional but there's still a lot to work to do and holes to fill in the middle before I dare to start fleshing out the pages. I have little experience in writing or comic making so I hope you forgive if some things don't make sense or the dialogue is a little on the nose so to say ahah!

The story will be packed with action with the overall tone being on the darker side, but it sure won't be lacking in humor! The project's main goal is to make it a celebration of all things submas & to prove to myself I can handle a big scale project despite my shortcomings!

This train has reached the terminal!

Thank you for riding my silly submas train!! I adore reading all your tags and comments! They brighten up my day & fuel my passion even more!! I hope to bring many more fun things for you to look forward to!! See you again soon!

ALL ABOARD!!

#Personal #Introduction

51 notes · View notes

faeryarchives · 1 year

Text

So This is Heartache

azul ashengrotto x gn!reader

azul would never thought that one of his fears would eventually come true and he is not ready to let you go yet.

note: angst during christmas eve is what santa would like don't worry it gets better in the end i think i am not that evil 🤓 spread the azul agenda !!

Everything comes to an end, Azul of all people would come to know that fact as it is how it goes with his contracts. whether be it raising their grades, helping people get their crush to notice them or pass an important alchemy exam - it will all go back to the way it was. He knew it all too well.

'Can you help me raise my grades up i really need to pass!' Of course this would be the typical wish of a high school student.

'I messed up my project and it is due tomorrow!' Accidents are sometimes too scary but one day maybe I can predict one.

'So there is this person, can you help me get together with them?' Would (Name) love me forever?

The prefect of the Ramshackle Dorm, the one he once deemed to be a competitor but ended up being his beloved. His life totally became more lively as he has you around - a safe place where he can let his guard down.

"Azul? What if one day we get separated by the inevitable string of fate?"

"Huh? What kind of nonsense is that? I wouldn't let anyone take you away from me, even if it I am on my last contract." You let out a laugh, leaning on his head which is on your shoulder and held his hand tenderly. "

"Yeah, as if we are going to be separated just like that!"

Hanging out with you along with the twins and Grim is chaotic in a way but it is still fun, not a boring day with you and your creative mind around. But his mother's saying would ring in his head from time to time.

'One day, you will meet someone you will love with all of your heart. But be careful - it may only lead to a heartbreaking end.'

One day, the dorm leader was waiting for you in the Mostro Lounge as usual and you came with the biggest smile in your face as if you just discovered a miracle. A smile from you is everything to him - his treasure. What he didn't knew that the next thing that would come out of your mouth could turn his world upside down.

"Azul! I think we just discovered a way for me to go back home!" Maybe it's because your words also caught the twins attention leading you to getting questioned that you didn't notice how Azul's smile dropped and his whole body turn stiff. All he can hear is his own heartbeat, drowning other sounds out.

'...that means, you are leaving him?' Azul clutched his hold on the pen while trying to contain the tears trying to escape his eyes. 'So, is this the heartache? Mother told me it would hurt but not this much.'

"Oh, Th-That's wonderful news darling! I am so happy for you."

"I know right? I can- Azul?" Everyone in the room stopped after you gasp - seeing tears run down your lover's face despite him keeping up his smile. "My apologies it seems like a dust got caught in my eye. Please give me a minute, its a huge amount of dust I wonder where it came from!" Seeing how the vibes changed, Jade quietly grabbed Floyd and Grim out of the restaurant leaving you and Azul alone.

He can feel your hand trying to wipe his tears away but all he want to do now is crawl into his octopus pot, hiding away from you.

"(Name), love - I would really appreciate if you give me some space."

"Please look at me in the eye Azul, I know what you are thinking right now. I want to say that, I will not leave just yet." The dorm leader keep backing up until his back hits the wall, accidentally letting his guard down as you grab both of his cheeks to force him to face you.

"Finally you are facing me. It wasn't that hard right?" And you gave him that smile, breaking down all of his walls causing him to let out the cries he had been holding on to every time the thought of you just leaving him behind comes up. His head buried in your shoulders, and you couldn't help but give him a hug, patting his hair softly.

"I am not ready to lose you yet."

"Yes, I know."

"I thought you were going to leave me all alone." Seeing how broken he sound, all you can do is whisper apologies over and over again while giving him small kisses on his temple.

"You were scared weren't you? I won't leave, until I can find a way for the two of us to visit each other's place." Pulling away only to stick your foreheads together causing your noses to touch.

"I was supposed to ask you if you could help me find another way but I chose the wrong wordings. I am so sorry for that."

"... you owe me cuddles later. I thought I would go crazy again for a moment." You stared at each other before bursting out in fits of laughter, you spent the whole afternoon discussing about the discovery with the dorm leader peering over your shoulder and his arms around your torso.

'Maybe, there are some things that do last for some time.'

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland imagines #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland headcanons #twisted wonderland scenarios #disney twisted wonderland #azul ashengrotto x reader #azul ashengrotto #twst azul #a.octavinelle #disney twst #azul x reader #twst scenarios #twst imagines #faeryarchives

202 notes · View notes

ok-sims · 6 months

Text

Things in Good Omens 2 I still find weird after maaaaany rewatches - Part II

Hey everyone! First of all, sorry for my spelling mistakes in the first post 🙈 Somehow I was able to misspell the misspelled word, but I give my word as an angel that am I not a demon. Also, I loved to hear yout thoughts on some of the topics! There were quite some things I hadn't noticed, like Miss Cheng's resturant on Aziraphale's list. Now that I had some more time to think and rewatched the show 2 more times there are some other things I still don't quite understand:

👩Nina and Maggie being immune to Aziraphale's miracles🛡️

Obviously they aren't immune to the miracle he put on the bookshop during the Jane Austen ball, since we can see they are being made to dance, despite their will, and Nina herself comments that something is forcing her to feel different emotions (she was sad after her breakup, but suddendly didn't feel sad anymore). But when Shax's legion of demons tries to break into the bookshop, Aziraphale tries do do some miracle on Nina and Maggie so they agree to leave the bookshop with the rest of the humans (Maggie is acting like her weird self again and wants to stand there and fight????, which falls into Maggie acting off the whole season), but the miracle does not work. It is clearly intended to show that Aziraphale is casting a miracle (he does the hand gesture and the miracle sound effect plays). But it is also made clear that it did not work (including Nina's comment, "are you trying to hypnotize us?"). Another scene that corroborates with their "immunity" is when Crowley scorts out of the bookshop, when the Hell and Heaven gangs arrive after Aziphale blow up his halo. When they are outside, Crowley says that Nina and Maggie should forget everything that happened that night (he told the same to the others humans who attented the ball, and it apparently worked - check Mr Brown's quick convo with Mutt outside of the café). What the feck is going on with Maggie and Nina?

📙A.Z. Fell's diaries✒️

While it is pretty clear to me now that all the flashbacks in this season (officialy called "minisodes") are told from Aziraphale's perspective. In episode 2, the minisode seens to be Aziraphale remembering his and Crowley's encounter with Job, and getting so lost in this memory, that Gabriel points out that a long time has passed and Crowley even had left the bookshop by the time Aziraphale is done, making it clear we are getting Aziraphale's take of the Job story. In episode 4, the minisode starts right after Shax is able to "trick" Aziraphale, and the minisode storyline revolves around an incident she mentions during their conversation. Crowley is not even in this scene, despite being a central topic of their talk, and of the minisode itself, so it is safe to say we are getting Aziraphale's take again.

But the other minisode is "triggered" in a different way: it starts with Aziraphale writing in his diary (btw it is the first time he having a diary is ever mentioned!), and he states that there many volumes of these diaries. Funnily enough, his diaries are not mentioned again. Of course, once again we can clearly see the minisode is from Aziraphale's perspective (it could not get any more "in your nose" than that). But the fact that these diaries are not brought up again, even if it would have made sense in context (for example, the other two minisodes could have used the diary as a narrative device as well) is kind of odd to me. My best guess is that the diaries will be important in S3, while Aziraphale is way in Heaven, and Crowley/Muriel/a secret third character happens to find them/needs to find them for some reason.

🍷The toast after Wee Morag's death 🪦

This one might be a little silly, but I can't really wrap my head around it. In The Resurrectionist's minisode (as told by Aziraphale in his diary), Crowley and Aziraphale are having a date in a graveyard happen to stumble on Elspeth stealing buried bodies to make some money. We see the minisode unfold until Wee Morag tragically dies, and Elspeth can finally get some cash (albeit less than expected), so she steals some laudanum, buys wine and, for some reason, returns to the mausoleum were Wee Morag died to have a toast with Crowley and Aziraphale.

Why is she meeting with them again? How did they know how/where/when to find her? Since only Elspeth and Mr Dalrymple apper in the scene she steals the laudanum, I'm pretty sure Aziraphale and Crowley weren't there with her, and when the toast scene begins, they are shown entering the mausoleum again (so it is not like they were waiting inside the Mausoleum for Elspeth to come back and make a toast). I'm not sure if the minisode takes place during only one night (Aziraphale explicitly states Crowley wanted to meet him at midnight, so the minisode starts around this time), because it seens like a little too much to be done in such a short time, and when the minisode ends, it is still nightime (when Crowley is dragged to Hell), but the point is: why and how would the angel/demon duo get back to the mausoleum to have a toast with Elspeth? I'm not saying they wouldn't want to do it, but the logistics seen a bit off to me.

Once again, please let me know your insights on it! I was very pleasantly surprised with the interactions with the previous post, I'm glad to not just be shouting into the void, and I loved hearing everyone's perspectives!

#good omens #good omens meta #good omens 2 #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #elspeth #wee morag

27 notes · View notes

nicktremblaywayfu · 1 year

Text

The Goddess tied our fate (2/2)

Chapter 2 : At Last We're Finally Together

Author Note : I want Arthur and Ammit to wreck my ass at the same time so there you go Ammit fucking you using Arthurs body and somehow lowkey forced you both into an intercourse. Also Post-asylum Harrow

Summary : Your Internship has ended, adding a worth experience note in your work cv. Despite all the treatment you gave to Arthur, including fulfilling his lust almost every night, his goddess wasn't still satisfied.

Rating : 18+ (Adults Only !)

Pairing : Ammit/Reader/Arthur Harrow

Characters : Arthur Harrow, Ammit, You (reader)

Tags and Warning : Dubcon, Body possession, a hint of Ammit wanting the reader in THAT way, the reader is early 20s, Porn with semi-plot, Older man/Younger woman, age differences, height differences, power play, emotional manipulation, hair pulling, using threats, trespassing, yandere coded, possessive, fingering, oral (female receiving)

Words : 4045

Available on Ao3 as well

—

You packed your stuff in your room, one of the few last things to do here. Your internship was over and the hospital was satisfied with your work. Especially in handling Arthur and had calmed his episodes of misery, they praised you for your hard job. The fact that they have no idea how you do that was a miracle. He was declared to be legally sane, though you doubted that. Somehow you wondered if they manipulated his data to cover up the true suffering he had deep inside. He was still sick, but he was good at masking it. He may look fine but the reality was the contrary. He was still far from being okay.

However, considering at least half of the hospital staff were his followers, judging from them having similar sigil on their wrist, maybe they would handle him even if he was away from the hospital. You decided to let them do their job, it would make your head dizzy thinking how complex it could be. Besides they must need their goddess inside him. Just for both her and his sake they took them away from the public world.

No fund was needed in his treatment, as two men were generous enough to pay. In fact, it was them who put him in this hospital for his well-being. Although strangely, you only saw one man despite him filling in two names. Perhaps for his friend that was shy to show up ? You wished you could know these generous men better.

The farewell was not big, but the staff were kind enough to give you a small farewell gift. A necklace with golden scarab pendant, lapis lazuli sphere decorating the center of it. Too fancy for a little gift. Must be from their beloved leader that was for sure.

But you can't resist the beauty of it. It fitted perfectly on you like it was meant to be

You took a last glance at the hospital before driving home, and the next thing you need to know is finding a real job to fill your stomach and pay the bills.

Oh to think it must be nice living in Harrow's cult. You called it a cult, he called it a community. But technically it was still a cult, even if it was too nice to be called as such. They didn't need much money in their wallet as almost everything was produced in their own village. Vegetables, meat, some of them even able to build their own energy source. No need to work from 9 to 5 for a minimum wage, just living happily and helpful.

The road was busy with the sunlight temperature being mild. Not as cold as fall, not as hot as summer. A perfect temperature. People minding their own business, their jobs. Parents walking down the street with their children, couples hugging each other after long time no see. A thought of your mind picturing Arthur sitting on the passenger’s seat striked you.

You shook your head, you doubted that your feelings were involved. Yes you had done countless sexual activity for him but that was for his sake to be given mercy by whatever creature inside him. Your farewell with him wasn't filled with teary eyes anyway. Just casually bidding a bye as he was picked up by his followers.

Although one stranger did ask his whereabouts, a man with a similar face with the one that funded his treatment. He drove a limousine, like picking up a world-level celebrity. The hospital staff were suspicious about him, lies were emitted hoping it would save their leader from that man, whoever he might be. He glanced at you for a while before going inside his limo and left without any words.

And just like that, the only thing left in front of you was the gust of wind dancing with the fallen leaves.

After what you felt like a long journey on the road filled with busy humans, you finally reached your house. It was not big, but enough to put your head under the roof sheltering you from snow or rain. Series of clicking unlocked the door, and a poorly lit room greeted you with a little bit of sunlight as its main light source.

You inhaled, air coming inside your lung filling the emptiness inside of you. You would definitely miss the crowd of the asylum.

And you were not the only one missing something right now.

You freezed like a cold cobblestone statue in the winter, looking at the sight served in front of you.

A man that is no other than Arthur Harrow himself, sitting on a small sofa. Book of your personal journal opened in his hand, the witness of whatever he did in your house.

“I just couldn’t stop thinking about you.” His blue eyes felt like speaking as well.

“I- we just couldn’t. We couldn’t just let you leave like that.” He slowly stood up, putting your journal on the coffee table.

“And what does that mean by all this? What are you doing in my house?” Your hands snaked to your pocket, looking for your card knife.

“No no, wait, please, I don't mean to hurt you.” He marched towards you and wrapped around your body with his hands, hugging you tight as your card knife dropped from your hold.

“I’m sorry I have to come like this but I promise you, we meant no harm.”

“Arthur Harrow, you just trespassed someone’s house ! Tell me a reason why i shouldn’t call the police for you action-”

“BECAUSE IF YOU DO, HE WILL BE THE ONE SUFFERED ! ” Thundering voice shocked you to the point your body met the surface of the floor.

Your breath was shaky, eyes widened with what you saw. A fury on his eyes, hands opened acting like a claw. And you thought she was calmed after all you did for her human.

Within a second, his expression changed. Anger turned into worry, fuming reddening face has faded with a drop of tear fallen.

“Are- are you alright ? I’m sorry, I'm terribly sorry.” Arthur helped you to get up, making you sit on the sofa comfortably.

Your legs felt like jelly, you even needed to hold on the table to stand before. Mouth even too weak to say something for a moment.

“Listen, I know you won’t forgive me for this, for trespassing your house, I know and I understand. But I need you to know that I can't just leave you.” He tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, it would be sweet if there was no demon inside him.

“You’re not healed yet, Arthur. How could you even declared as legally sane was still beyond my understanding.”

“Because she was not an illness. She is a goddess. My goddess. She was truly trapped inside my body. Please, listen and believe me.” He pleaded, voice cracked as he was about to cry.

“Then prove it. Last time you told me she couldn’t show up fully because the world could no longer know her whereabouts, nor her existence. Now, there’s just the two of us.” You gave him a sharp, serious gaze. You really meant it and demanded proof.

Arthur looked down for a moment, sighed then looked upon your eyes.

“Please be gentle with her.”

He was not talking to you.

He steadied his breath, stroking your hair softly. Only for a few seconds later the soft gentle strokes turned into a rough, hard grasp tugging at your hair.

“After these times, you still doubted me, mortal ? If I wasn't trapped in this disgusting flesh prison, I'd show my fangs close enough for you to see that I am , in fact, real.” The Goddess inside Arthur tugged your hair hard enough, forcing you to face the ceiling above.

“Oh I hope this was proof for you because I do not wish to punish your fragile human body. But justice still needs to be served and I need to know your fates as well your sins before I can officially declare you as a good person.” She chuckled in a sinister way. Letting go of your hurted scalp from the tug, she grabbed both of your hands and put both on Arthur’s.

Both of you looked at the swinging scales on Arthur’s wrist, scaling your fates, your sins, as well your good deeds.The more you struggled to let go, the tighter she held your hands.

Seconds felt like minutes, minutes felt like hours, finally the scales have decided.

A deep, dark green hue shown on the scale. The color of good deeds. The color of balance.

“Well deserved, even though you doubted me before.” She smirked widely, then let Arthur take control of his body again.

The way he looked, reminding you of a sad, lost puppy in the middle of rain. He looked at his scales, still in green hue.

“I know you are a good person. I never judged you before, because I just know from my deepest heart you never meant any harm especially to us.” He smiled at you, a hint of sadness behind the curve. You were still in shock, not knowing what to do nor to say. Perhaps you shouldn't take the internship program in that damned asylum. Maybe if you never knew him, you would never be dragged into this kind of shit show.

“Don’t leave us. Please.” Arthur held both of your hands tightly.

“Not with my life being threatened, Arthur.”

“I know, I promise that was the last time. Please, I'm begging you.”

“Please. Please, I'm begging you. Please, stay with me.” He bowed his head down to your hands.

“I’m sorry. Please, I'm begging you right now.” His voice was shaking, as you felt your hands getting a bit wet.

You sighed, giving time for your mind to decide. It was not like you couldn’t take care of him. It was what inside him that worried you.

“Do you truly have a heart to refuse his beg? This man right now genuinely enjoins you, mortal.” Wrists were painful as she took control of him for a moment, grasping you mercilessly.

“Very well. I will. I will stay just for you.” You leaned in, kissing Arthur’s hair softly. His hair was softer now, although it didn't smell like fragrant shampoo nor smell bad. Just smell like him. The scent that you were familiar with.

Arthur brought his head up to see you. Pitiful red eyes with his cheek turned into a river stream of his tears. You furrowed your brows as well pressing your lips together, hoping you won’t regret this life-time commitment.

“Thank you. Thank you, I owe you everything.” He stood up a bit to hug you so tight that you struggled to breathe a bit.

He was once ambitious, some even called him a ruthless man. Now he was completely broken. Living as a live prison for a damned goddess. He sat next to you, calming his weep. You stroked his back, trying your best to comfort him. Never in your life have you seen this man so emotional. So fragile. Fragile like a thin porcelain that was broken, now forced to hold itself with just a drop of glue.

He leaned on you, head resting on your shoulder. There was silence for a few minutes, a space for your both minds. It was far from awkward silence, yet you couldn’t say this is a comforting one as well. Just silence.

“I hope you liked the gift from me.” He glanced at your golden shining necklace.

“I do. I really love it. Thanks, Arthur.”

He smiled softly.

“The necklace was found in 334 BC. It belonged to a high priestess in that era. Forged by the best blacksmith and given to her as a gift that she has helped Ammit gathered hundreds of her followers. Wise and charismatic, the necklace was the witness of her kindness.”

“And now, it was bestowed by you.” he lifted his head to face you fully.

“We want you to have it. Your soul truly reminded us of her.”

He pulled his face closer to you, an inch away from your mouth.

“Stay with us, and we shall guarantee you will be treated much even better than how the high priestess treated in royalty. With this necklace as a symbol that you belong to us only. Be at our side. Be with us forever.” Arthur then put your hands together and kissed your knuckles gently.

“And I swear to Ammit your stomach will always be full, your head will be sheltered from rain, and your body will always be covered in excellent garments. What do you say?” Oh how could you say no with him then calling your name, whispering it like a magical chant.

“My answer remains the same. I will stay with you.” The space between you two was getting smaller.

“Forever?”

“Whatever you wished, Arthur.”

Felt like you were hypnotized answering it.

“Then so be it.” He leaned in, forehead touching each other. You closed your eyes as well with him, trying to learn that now you have to love him.

And suddenly, Arthur striked your lips with his. Hands on your cheek, forcing you into a deep, passionate kiss. You struggled to breathe with the sudden kiss.You tried to pull out from his kiss, only to hear an animalistic heavy growl from him.

“What the fuck are you doing Arthur ?!” You slapped him, then rubbed the spit he left on your lips with your sleeve.

“That- that wasn’t me.” He stood up, trembling with fear.

“I would never force you to do that.” His expression was too genuine to be faked.

“That was me, coward.” His body stiffen with veins showing on his neck. eyes shone purple for a second.

“You have laid with her many times yet you were scared even just to kiss her right now. I did not let you live just so you couldn’t initiate to achieve your dream. It was always me who made the first move. Might as well take her as my lover if you keep being this coward, Harrow.”

You were practically cornered in your own sofa, body sinking like hoping you could escape into nothingness.

“You were a coward, but I shall be generous enough to let you speak and see it by yourself.” And just by that, Arthur gained his consciousness once again. Except all his limbs and his body were lost from his control.

“My goddess, please don’t hurt her.” He pleaded as his body moved against his will.

Ammit didn’t answer as she kept holding the wheel steer of his body. His hand involuntarily cornering you more, trapping you in your very own house. All of what Arthur did to you was never truly out of his control despite it being his body. In another word, you were about to be fucked by two person at the same time in one body.

He then bit your neck, putting you in a choke hold both metaphorically and literally. Your neck being devoured would surely leave a deep red mark, with his hand now creeping under your shirt. You tried to push his hand away yet his bite only got harder.

“Stay still.” His voice was mixed with a godly lady heavy and hoarse voice.

“ I’m sorry.” Now his voice was what you usually hear from him. His real voice.

It was easy to tell apart who was who speaking to you.

His hand creeped inside, finding the bra you were wearing. He unclasped it on your back, lifting it inside your shirt and started playing with your breast.

“Arthur-” You almost choked on your own spit as you felt your nipples hardened.

“Forgive me. I truly didn’t want to hurt you.”

“Oh you’re lucky to be controlled by me. I know how to please her more than you thought.” She let out a deep, velvety animalistic chuckle. Like how you would imagine a crocodile laughing.

She continuously rubbed your nipple slowly, letting it pop on each stroke of Arthur’s thumb.

Still in Ammit's control, Arthur kept assaulting your neck with his mouth. He could not deny that he enjoyed it, but not the way that you were threatened. Yet what can he do anyway? The fact she let him get his full consciousness was more than generous enough.

After what felt like hours, he let go of your reddening, almost in purple hue hickies. His drool streaming down to your collarbone. Arthur started to unbutton your shirt, so eagerly like the goddess inside him couldn’t wait any longer. He tossed your shirt as well your bra to the floor, leaving your chest bare and hanging as a view. Despite the number you have been doing with him, he never ceases to be amazed with your body. It always felt like the first time.

Like a hungry crocodile hatchling, he clinged his mouth to your breast, with his hands supporting his weight and the other paying with your other breast. His growls matched your pant, trying to endure the sensation. He sucked on your breast like always been yearning for it.

Lips pressed firmly against your sensitive nipples as he sucked and licked them. His tongue sliding along your hard nipple until you screamed loudly as his teeth sank on it, biting you slightly. A loud moan escaped your lips, causing him to suck harder, and then he bit you deeper.

"There's no need to resist you two mortals. None of you could lie to my face." Involuntarily, Arthur grabbed your throat and choked you.

The strength of his arm muscle mixed with the force of Ammit made your head get lighter. He then kissed you again, having no choice but to succumb and let her enjoy your mouth using his body. You gave up, limping as Arthur devoured your lips. Tongue dancing to each other as he kept eating you.

After it was satisfying for the goddess inside of him, Arthur pulled out the kiss. String of saliva connected both of your tongues, showing how you have mixed your mouth fluid with his. You inhaled deeply, exhaling with relief that you could breathe.

Arthur reached your pants eagerly, with you stopping him.

"Ammit, I need to talk to you." You looked at Arthur's eye sharply.

"Do you truly wish to resist furthermore, human?" She spoke.

"Do we really need to do this? I have done enough for Arthur and the promise was you to let him live in peace. Is this what you call peace?" Just after you finished your words, she laughed loudly and tilted Arthur's head.

"Oh dear, are you really thinking I'm doing this solely because of my wish? Tell her, Harrow. Tell her the truth. Tell her why you couldn't stop thinking about her so that you came here." His expression dropped as she gave him control again.

He closed his eyes for a moment, pressing his lips.

"I'm sorry. What Ammit said was true. It was my wish to make love with you again." Arthur softly stroked your cheek.

"But I didn't wish to end up like this. Do I really have the choice to disobey? She has my body and now I can't even move my own limbs. Please, tell her if you wish to stop. I'd deal with the consequences just for you to be safe, you don't have to worry about me." His eyes began to tear.

"I will be fine." Sometimes the whisper of gossip that he was manipulative was true or not.

You did not answer for a moment. Rather, you took off your pants completely, spreading your legs for him to see your vagina bare and whole.

"You could've told me from the beginning, Arthur." You gestured to him as an invitation.

Arthur truly couldn't lie to his lust. He swallowed his spit looking at your pussy, wet and slick with the juice dripping. Like knowing as he rubbed it with his thumb, his fingers gently caressing your outer lips. You mewled as he began pumping you with two of his digits, deep against your inner canal. But he saved it for his mouth.

You saw Arthur closing his eyes as he placed his tongue on your opening. He sucked, moving his mouth, now tongue dancing with your clit.

"Arthur- Fuck !" How do you tell Ammit that she does really know how to please you using his body?

He kissed, ate, and licked your pussy. Your lubricated vagina was mixed with his spit. His whole tongue covering your lower lips, licking it whole. Oh it was just the beginning and he was drunk like you were an alcohol for him. He put his tongue inside you again, licking you clean insides while his finger continued to rub your clit mercilessly.

This is exactly how he wished to do after last night's wet dream he got. He did not have the courage to ask, but Ammit did not care about his doubts.

He kept sucking your pussy as his tongue went inside you, teasing you. At the end you wanted more and more. So much more than just his tongue. You moaned so loud, feeling the pleasure of your orgasm coming up, ready to burst.

And when he felt it, he pulled out of you. He carried you from the sofa, putting you on the large coffee table causing mess and everything fell from the surface.

Arthur looked at you, in a form of mix between sad, lust, and eagerness. he pulled his pants down, letting his cock revealed in full glory. Throbbing and veiny, ready to meet your entranceHe lifted your knees, positioning you at the entrance. He put one leg over his shoulder as the other being held, guiding himself to your hole. He let go both of your elevated thighs, placing both of his palms on top of your hips, pushing you deeper into him.

Both of his arms holding your waist as he pushed himself into you, your hands forming a fist enduring his girth. Your breathing became more shallow, and your heart beating faster.

He leaned closer, supporting himself. He looked at your face, reddening cheek with tears falling down. He swore to Ammit that this intercourse felt like the first time.

“Oh my goddess-” His chest puffed and collapsed as he tried to adjust his breath with his lust.

As he rocked in and out of you, his hips thrusting in a fast pace. You panted and moaned loudly, some of them were half emitted curses Some of them were pleas. All of them were filled with ecstasy. The fact that you were being fucked mercilessly on your coffee table was the least thing you expected today. The sight of your tits bouncing from the pace only to make both Arthur and Ammit eager to fuck you harder and rougher than before.

"Arthur" You tried to speak between your breaths.

"Slow down, i'm gonna-" You couldn't speak a whole sentence fully.

Instead, he held your waists and fastened his pace. He was destroying your pussy, head thrown back with mewl turned into short screams.

Finally, you let yourself out. Shaking and trying to gain your full consciousness after being wrecked by him. You were caught off-guard with him suddenly rocking you again, for Arthur to reach his climax. He snaked his arms behind your back for support, hugging you as he let himself out filling you inside. He caught his breath, feeling how his seeds were spilling from your hole. He pulled away, releasing his grip around you.

You limped on the table, energy drained by the intercourse. You probably needed assistance to walk properly for a few hours.

Arthur fell on the floor, gaining his full control once again. He looked at his hands, then looked at you.

“What have I done..” He pulled some tissue that the box fell on the floor, rubbed you clean from his own seeds.

He carried you, letting you lay on his lap. You were really tired, exhausted that you couldn't say anything.

As you looked at Arthur, you heard the familiar whisper.

“You belong to us forever, mortal.”

—

#arthur harrow #arthur harrow x reader #moon knight fanfiction #marvel villain #x reader #moon knight #mcu #ns/fw #reader insert #self-insert #arthur harrow fanfictions #ammit #ammit x reader

53 notes · View notes

moprp · 2 years

Text

im no baby, im a big brave girl! (and big girls dont cry!)

Eyy I’m finally done! This fic is dedicated to our dearest (and my favorite) authors, @wikluk and @adabofblessings!!! Since this is for said authors, I added small easter eggs for each. If u know, then u know ;)

Summary: Following her disastrous gift ceremony, little Mirabel thinks she isn’t allowed to sleep in the nursery anymore because she had her fifth birthday and that’s when the kids leave the nursery. Since there’s no other (her own) room for her, she feels the need to leave Casita, so she packs her things and tries to do so but she’s caught by Julieta/Agustin/both of them. Read to find out ;)

Word Count: 7178

(pls view the tags, they’re at the end of the post)

Happy reading! (constructive criticism is welcome!)

...

As soon as her big and pure eyes welled up with shiny tears, Julieta practically snatched Mirabel away, swiftly taking her to the nursery as whispers emitted from the courtyard. Something unexpected had happened; her door had dissipated into nothing, leaving a confused five-year-old looking to her parents for guidance. The event had shocked the whole Encanto at that very moment, and Pepa may or may not have thundered a couple of times, Julieta didn't notice, however, as her focus was locked on her youngest and her youngest only.

People are going to talk and she knew it, all of them did. But Julieta couldn't bring herself to care, all she could bring herself to think about is her Mirabel – her sweet and precious little mariposa that deserved every ounce of happiness.

As soon as she shut the door behind them, the tears that hung in Mirabel's eyes suddenly burst out, her body wracked with sobs as she cried into the fabric of Julieta's clothes. She clenched her mami's dress like a lifeline, her tiny knuckles turning pearly white. Julieta chewed at the inside of her cheek as she held her baby close to her chest, walking over to the bed meant for toddlers.

Mirabel, being a premature baby – although it's still slightly concerning on Julieta's part – had its perks. Fortunately, one of the said perks is being able to cuddle with her mamá on a single bed because of her smaller size.

As Mirabel and Julieta curled up together on the nursery bed, muffled sounds of Alma coaxing everyone to leave could be heard as well as what could possibly be the next hurricane started brewing, the temperature dropping significantly. Soft and barely audible squeaks were heard beyond the door and por dios, who knows what kind of nonsense rumors Dolores was currently hearing. The little voices of Isabela and Luisa bombarding their papá with questions about their hermanita made Julieta's heart constrict by an inch or two.

No one had answers right now.

Not that she minded, chasing Mirabel's sadness away is her mission at the moment.

"Mami?" her raw voice broke the older woman out of her thoughts as she sniffled quietly.

"Yes, mi vida?"

"Why didn't I get a gift? Did I do something wrong? Is Abuela mad at me?"

She ignored the feeling of her lungs ceasing to function. Just the fact that her hija's mind is currently raising with such thoughts gave her an unsettling sensation in the pit of her stomach.

"I have no idea, corazón. Your Abuela could never be mad at you, she's simply just as surprised as the rest of us are." she stroked her curly locks with her fingers, eyes never leaving her glossy ones.

"I thought maybe Abuela's angry with me and that's why I didn't get a gift."

Mirabel and transgression do not mix. How could a toddler be capable of committing a horrible mistake for the miracle to reject her? It's simply implausible, especially when she seems to have a special connection to Casita more than anyone else in the family.

"You did nothing wrong, amor. You did everything you were told. Your papi, Isa, Lulu, and I are so proud of you for being brave out there." she booped Mirabel on the nose, making her tears momentarily halt as she gave a small smile.

Good.

She's still smiling despite the circumstances.

"I was?"

"Sí, mi vida, you were mi valiente bebé!" she gave her daughter a tight hug, driving out some giggles from the toddler.

"I'm no baby, mamá! I was a big brave girl out there!"

"Ay mi vida, bebé or not, you're still our brave little mariposa." she attacked the young girl with smooches to the face, eliciting loud and hearty squeals.

Julieta internally smiled wide as Mirabel stopped crying, her focus was now on her dress, tiny fingers tracing every detail of embroidery on her clothes. She had always been interested in these kinds of things, the healer couldn't help but wonder if her youngest would grow up to be a tailor, just like her papi. Once Mirabel began dumping her mamá with questions about yarn and such, she released a breath she didn't know she held. Her hija was here, she was fine. She was able to chase the sadness away this time.

The failed gift ceremony would awaken something else within the family, she knew. Based on mamá's reaction alone, it had already started. The way her warm expression flashed multiple emotions in such a short duration could make anyone who had witnessed it stutter. Warmth, confusion, horror, stone-cold, professional, it was almost terrifying. She kept her gaze on Mirabel and wished the stars that she wouldn't be faced with any more burdens. She may have dodged the burdens of having a gift, but she knows it won't stop there. This time, she’ll be forced to carry the heavy weights of being giftless.

All alone too.

Because she is the first. The first to be centered in an unimaginable light. She's the only Madrigal who was born into the family only to not receive a blessing from the candle. Had the candle deemed her unworthy? Did they simply have to retry the whole ceremony to get a gift? Or did the candle truly just have other plans for Mirabel?

Too many questions and none to be answered, sadly.

"Mira?"

"Yes, mami?" she looked up to her madre, an innocent glow in her eyes.

"Promise me you'll be my strong amor. Stand tall and be proud of who you are, be brave no matter what happens. Because gift or no gift, you're just as special as anyone else in this family. Do you understand?"

Mirabel smiled brightly, the twinkling of her irises unfading at the newfound strength. "Of course mami, I promise!" she held up her pinky and Julieta followed as their fingers curled against one another. "I pinky promise!"

Her heart swelled with affection and she couldn't hold back the maternal instinct that flooded her entire being at that moment. For the millionth time today, she showered Mirabel with kisses as she squirmed. "Bien. ¡Ay, te amo mi cosa linda!" she exclaimed between the spray of smooches.

The toddler's squirms died down as soon as Julieta hummed her a soothing lullaby. She'd always favored this tune, even when she was an unborn baby living in her womb. She recalled Mirabel was a restless baby, always making her mamá's heart flutter with each movement she made. Whenever she heard the voice of someone she liked, she'd kick and maneuver with double enthusiasm. Once, Agustín had been talking to a very awake Mirabel as Julieta lay resting on the bed, listening to the conversation her esposo started with the baby about how chocolate is created. Out of nowhere, Mirabel unknowingly kicked Julieta's spine and had her bedridden for a good week, but her hija didn't need to know that. She followed her soft singing with gentle strokes on her back, hoping to ease any remaining traces of pain her mariposa was feeling.

As if on cue, the door to the nursery echoed with a soft knock, followed by a creek. Agustín peaked his head in the small crack, followed by Isabela and Luisa. "Hey mis amores, are we interrupting anything?"

Mirabel perked up, eyes wide and clear with excitement. "Papi! Isa! Lu!" she gently released herself from her mother's grasp before speeding to the door, letting all three of them in.

He chuckled as he watched all of his hijas hold each other in tight hugs, their chubby cheeks colliding together from the side. "I'll take that as a no." he ruffled Mirabel's hair as she giggled. "Doing good, Miraboo?"

"Yes, Papá!" She moved to hug his legs and was surrounded by her sisters in a second. She let go and faced them, only to bring them both into another embrace. The sweet display warmed the parent's hearts, possibly faster than some of Pepa's mood swings. Julieta stood up and regarded Agustín, hand automatically reaching in to hold his big and warm one as they looked at the scene before them.

"We were worried about you, Mira." Isabela quietly admitted and with a wave of her hand, she created Mirabel's favorite flower as she tucked it between her brown strands.

"Yeah, I thought something bad happened. I was ready to fight for you!" Luisa said, pulling her little sister off her feet and setting her on her shoulders while securely holding her thighs, making Mirabel shine bright and squeal in surprise.

"I'm okay, hermanas. Mami said I was a big brave girl out there!" she said with as much smugness she could muster. She glanced at her mother with a smile before diverting her attention back to her sisters.

"Mami said I'm brave too, you know." Isabela piped in with a playful roll of her eyes.

"Uh-huh, were you brave when you found an ant living in one of your flowers?"

"Hey! At least I didn't scream as loud as Luisa did when a butterfly landed on her finger!" she retorted.

"I want no part in this conversation." Luisa inquired with raised eyebrows.

"You don't like butterflies, Luisa? You make me sad." she feigned offense.

As the light-hearted conversation turned into some ordinary sibling bickering, Julieta instinctively squeezed Agustín's hand tighter as the latter reciprocated the action. She hoped this bond between their girls wouldn't change despite the events earlier.

At some point in the night, the girls had somehow squeezed themselves into Mirabel's bed without one of them falling off as they drifted into a peaceful slumber together.

Julieta looked on, her tilted head slightly; she couldn't help the toothy grin and contented sigh that slipped out.

Agustín bumped her hip with his. "We raised tres niñas pequeñas properly, didn't we?"

She hummed in response, her eyes never leaving the relaxed expressions of their daughters. He's right; Isabela, despite sealing herself off ever since her gift ceremony, is still the same bebé they had held in their arms after her birth, always so thoughtful and sweet. And Luisa, oh their adorable niña. She'd had unfortunately taken her overworking habit after her madre, though that didn't stop her from being equally loving and caring to everyone. Lastly, Mirabel. Ay, this child, such a young soul, and yet she's already gone through too much for her age. But even after being rejected by the candle, she kept a brave face. The way Mirabel's eyes welled up with tears as she looked longingly at her parents. The way none of those tears spilled until she was alone and in her mother's arms is a sight Julieta wouldn't forget anytime soon. The image will be permanently drilled into Julieta's skull, as well as Agustín's, despite his absence during the first half of their little get-away circle in the nursery.

It was getting rather late, however, Agustín didn't want to have to leave their side, especially not so soon after what had happened. It seemed like Julieta read his mind, for she felt the same, the idea of leaving her niñas right now could fall down a well, for all she cared. Suddenly, an idea popped up in her head and she glanced around the room.

"Casita?" the wooden floor flipped in response.

"Could you fetch me a double mattress, pillows, and a blanket por favor?” Julieta asked, “We would like to sleep here for the evening."

And just like that, with another flip of the wooden floorboards, a mattress came into frame, along with the pillows and blankets she'd asked for. Considering everything had come from under the floorboards, Julieta was utterly surprised when she noticed that none of the items were dusty or molded. Their magical casa truly works wonders, as her mamá said.

She smiled and patted the wall, hoping to convey the message that she was grateful. "Gracias, Casita." The house repeated its earlier actions, but this time, it bounced a roll of blue yarn up and down in response to Julieta.

They both settled down, pulling one another close as they pondered today's happenings. Today had been hectic indeed, from making sure the food and decorations were well-prepared, to fretting over Mirabel, the parents were expecting a perfect day, but today was far from perfect. Instead, they got themselves a bittersweet day.

They weren't blind to the misery of the Madrigals, no. They could see it in themselves, but also others. The way Pepa would walk around with a looming cloud threatening to spill water, almost like her own tears. The way Félix would follow his esposo around to bring comfort and whisper sweet nothings to her ear. The way Dolores winces when someone claps or shouts, hell, she even approached Julieta to ask for something that'd make her sensory overload fade. Camilo is still in the early stages of being a Madrigal, eventually, he will have a crisis too, despite their dismay about it. The way Bruno would shy away from basically anyone in fear of being called ‘Bad Luck Bruno’ like the town claims him to be. The way Isabela looks to her Abuela for approval, when, in fact, she doesn't need it. And finally, the way Luisa could never just say no. Behind closed doors, the miracle is both a blessing and a curse. It's tied to every Madrigal, unfortunately.

"I'm scared for her, Agustín. I'm afraid of what she might experience just because she's different."

"Lo sé, me too. All we can do is be there for her, amor." he ran his long fingers through her thick and curly hair as she stifled a yawn. This, however, did not go unnoticed by Agustín. "Sleep now, corazón, you need energy for tomorrow, we'll take it one day at a time."

Right, one day at a time.

~~~~

As Mirabel opened her eyes, she noticed one figure cuddled up next to her, Isabela. She knew based on the flower scent and the soft snoring alone, though as she looked to her left, she frowned once she noticed Luisa was gone.

Ay Lulu, Mirabel figured she was probably already in town overworking herself and as she slowly sat up, she climbed off the bed, careful not to accidentally hit Isabela and wake her up. She took her green glasses and gingerly put them on, watching as the world around her sharpened. Only then had she realized that next to the bed was a huge mattress where her papi slept alone, snoring softly against the pillows. Her mamá was nowhere to be seen, probably already in the kitchen cooking breakfast for the family. Her insides jumped with glee at the idea of getting to spend the morning with her mami, despite it practically being a personal ritual for the pair. Everyday since she could walk, Mirabel would wander into the kitchen and babble to Julieta nonstop until the food was fully prepared. Today was no different as she quietly exited the nursery and silently walked down the stairs, intending to surprise her madre as soon as she entered the kitchen.

However, instead of the soothing sounds of chopping and light sizzling, the voices of Abuela and her mamá were heard and none of them sounded happy.

Mirabel knew eavesdropping isn't good, in fact, she was about to turn around and give them some privacy when she heard her name in the conversation. Why are they talking about her? Is it because of her ceremony? But as people say, curiosity killed the cat, she couldn't help but listen in.

"Mija, have you perhaps talked to Mirabel about redoing the ceremony? She was originally supposed to get her gift, however, it failed." Abuela said, her voice laced with worry.

"What are you implying, mamá? That Mirabel isn't perfect without a gift? She'll do completely fine without one." Woah, she wasn't expecting her Mamá to have such a thick and aggressive tone in contrast to her usual voice, which was the exact opposite; soft and comforting. If her mama sounds upset, it must be bad.

"That's not what I meant, Julieta. I asked because the nursery is meant for Madrigals before their ceremony, not afterward. Shouldn't she have her own room instead of the nursery?" Abuela tried again, though Julieta was having none of it.

"Nothing's wrong with mi hija staying in the nursery, we can decorate it according to her desires" she said sharply as sounds of something being swiftly chopped made itself audible to her ears.

"Julieta, I know our magic is strong. It wouldn't just reject Mirabel so easily."

Julieta sighed, she seemed to want to bite back with something else, but held her tongue instead, almost as if she sensed another presence listening in on their conversation.

"Mamá..."

"We have to redo the ceremony, mija. I've asked Bruno for a vision. He still hasn't come up with something, so it's better to act now, just in case."

"No Mamá, I will not have my Mirabel do it again."

"What if it works this time?"

The healer said nothing. Yes, normally she'd let things slide when it comes to her madre, however today, she had hit a sore spot that made Julieta jump into action with zero hesitation. Mirabel wondered what could've been so sore about redoing the whole ceremony. Abuela was right, there's a chance it would work the second time! But since she'd eavesdropped, she could only wait for one of the adults to approach her with the idea to avoid being outed for listening in on someone else's conversation.

Then, it dawned on her: big girls don't sleep in nurseries after their ceremony, that's when they sleep in their new room.

But since she hadn't gotten her new room, where would she stay? Her mami and papi's room seemed the most appealing, although she couldn't bring herself to burden her parents. Besides, she's a big brave girl that can take on anything, as her mamá had said! Being brave meant keeping your burdens to yourself, and so, she did. She'd find a way around the issue eventually, for her familia.

What broke her out of her little daydream were heavy footsteps approaching the main area of the casa. She scurried away from the kitchen, ducking behind a giant vase that towers over her. She peeked around the corner just in time to see Abuela muttering a prayer of some sort while walking up the stairs, shutting the door behind her. Once she knew the coast was clear, she hurried to her mamá and greeted her with a warm smile.

"Buenos días, mamá!" she hugged her legs from behind, earning a soft chuckle from the older woman.

"Buenos días, mi amor. Did you rest well?" she watched as the five-year-old carefully climbed on the stool provided next to her.

"Sí, papi and Isa were snoring," Mirabel said with a fake pout, Julieta couldn't help the sudden urge to pinch her chubby cheeks. As expected, Mirabel grimaced and attempted to wrestle out of her mother's grasp to no avail.

"Don't let Isa catch you saying that."

"I'm not scared of a few cacti and a flower punch to the face, mami!"

At that, the healer momentarily paused before resuming her task of cutting vegetables and laughing lightly. "Ay Mira, do you think more gray hairs would do your mamá any good?"

Mirabel vigorously shook her head and gave an innocent smile as she watched Julieta continue with her work with a contemplative look on her face.

"Why don't you wake the rest of the familia up? Breakfast is almost ready."

With a quick sí mamá and a peck on the cheek, Mirabel rushed out of the room to fulfill her newfound task. She slowly trotted up the stairs and scanned her surroundings. Taking in the exchange between Abuela and her mami from earlier, it did make sense to her. If not the nursery, then where would she sleep tonight? She pondered her options: mami and papi's room is the most appealing idea, but she's a brave girl! And brave girls don't sleep in their parent's room. Isabela's room? No, it smelled of too many flower scents, it was almost nauseating and Mirabel wouldn't be able to handle it for long. Luisa's? Maybe. Based on the four times she had been in her hermana's room, she knows there's a huge pile of stuffed animals that resides in one of the corners. She could use that as a bed, although her room is known to be cold during the evening and slightly damp in the wee hours of the morning, and her mamá would fret over her if she catches something as small as a cold, so maybe not. Camilo's room? Too many mirrors, it's enough to give anybody a headache. She wonders how her primo manages to stay in his room without his head spinning. Dolores' room? Too soundproof. Besides, Dolores' room is her safe haven where no noise could be heard, so having a sleepover with her prima would be a nuisance. Tia Pepa and Tio Félix? If Mirabel has been observing them correctly, there hasn't been a day where her Tia Pepa hasn't drizzled at least once. The idea of wet clothing at some point in the night made Mirabel quickly throw the thought away. Anyways, she wouldn't want to be a witness to something possibly gross, especially when Tia and Tio seem to always be making those goo-goo eyes at each other. She grimaced and moved on to the other options. Tio Bruno's room is full of sand and stone, her little feet wouldn't be able to take walking up and down for meals and chores. Abuela's room is naturally off-limits, so scratch that.

Huh.

She frowned once she noticed the options weren't in her favor. If not inside their Casita, then...

She'd sleep outside! Where? Maybe in Señora Guzman's place. Wait no, if she went to anybody from town and asked to have a little sleepover with them, someone in the family would know about her top-secret plan and she couldn't risk her cover being blown, so she quickly erased the woman from the picture.

In the forest? Yes! She remembered the countless camping stories from her papá that the outside world of the Encanto was beautiful, full of plant and animal life, not to mention the number of butterflies and animal species that have yet to be discovered! The comfortable grass and giant banana leaves would do as bedding, she'd just have to bring a blanket and a lamp to scare off any predators. She could be resourceful with what she had!

Forest it is, then.

With her mind set on her big girl plans, she spent the rest of the day contemplating the best way to execute her plan flawlessly. From picking out the bag she'd use, to the amount of food she'd have to steal as midnight snacks (she internally apologized to her mamá for the sin she was about to commit), to how many stuffed toys she'd bring with her. It's just one night though, she'd come back in the morning with gifts for her familia!

Evening rolled around and greeted them with a cold breeze through the dimly-lit casa. Mirabel snuck out of dinner as soon as she devoured all her food and stayed in her room, the next step to her plan calls!

The whole day, she'd held her tongue, knowing if she did as much as mutter it, Dolores would hear her and tell everyone. Big brave girls don’t let their top secrets be known to others! In her mind, the plan was perfect. However, if anyone else from the Madrigal family found out – excluding Julieta, she'll probably go into a frenzy – they would shoot her worried glances and whisper to one another because, in the eyes of others, this plan is less than ideal. Worried glances and brave girls don't mix, in Mirabel's vocabulary.

~~~~

Mother's intuition, they say.

Julieta attempted to shake off the growing uncomfortable feeling in her stomach as she rinsed the dishes clean, her sleeves rolled up and several hair strands escaping her loose bun.

Something seems off about Mirabel.

The way Mirabel had acted today was incredibly suspicious; very unlike her. As she was preparing breakfast, the way her brows scrunched together in deep thought for a good 10 minutes caused her to frown slightly. Usually, her little mariposa would be talking about nothing in particular, each passing minute with no brakes. Every moment with her is never silent, especially for more than five minutes. Even the way she walked up the stairs seemed unusual. Her steps were slow and faint, very brow-raising for her normally bright and loud self, typically running up the stairs in fits of giggles – cackles even.

Once dinner had rolled around, instead of dishing up right after the prayer, she focused her attention on her youngest, who sat directly across the table with Camilo to her right, and Luisa to her left. As the rest of the family took their fair share of the meal (except Camilo, since 7 arepas had already been stacked on his plate), Mirabel's eyes locked with hers. Her eyes held fear for a split before being replaced with the brightest of smiles. Julieta returned a warm grin, taking a personal note to check in with her hija later in the evening. In all her years of living, she could tell the difference between a genuine smile and a masked smile. Hell, her eldest and middle child have been wearing it ever since their ceremonies. Mirabel's was uncharacteristically incomplete, lacking the glimmering effect in her eyes that's present each time she shows her baby teeth.

She did find it somewhat comforting to watch Mirabel gobble up all of her food, like a hungry wolf that hadn't eaten in days, ever so slightly muttering a gracias mama.

At least her appetite is favorable. It's only been a day since the failed gift ceremony, and that, without a doubt, drained Mirabel out. Maybe she's just imagining things, she'd have more time to observe other changes in the days to follow.

Healing the pain on the inside is her ideal wish, even if it sounds like such a pipe dream. If only her gift worked in her favor, allowing her to heal literally anything then she wouldn't have to worry much, wouldn't have a bunch of gray hairs at the unripe age of forty.

Actually, that's a lie, Agustín would probably force all her hair to go white before she even hits sixty, with all his accident-proneness.

She completed the dishes and wiped her hands on her apron, more than ready to head upstairs and give out smooches to her bebés. As if summoned, slender arms snaked around her waist, locking her in place as the scent of someone familiar entered her nostrils.

"Good evening, mi amor." he placed a gentle kiss on her cheek, nuzzling her hair and inhaling the unmistakable smell of herbs.

"Hello, to you too, mi vida." she chuckled and cupped the side of his face.

He hummed as they remained still for a while, sulking in the comfortable silence that befell them. Taking in the state of his wife; her hair is messier than usual, forehead lines are more defined, and her eyes look distant as if her head is far, far away. Somehow, an unspoken language was heard on his end.

"You're concerned," he concluded, "What about?"

She released a shaky sigh. "It's Mirabel. Something seems... off about her since this morning, I'm confused as to what it is." Agustín hummed, he seems to have the same thought, at least she knows it isn't all in her head. "If she had caught infection, it would've been healed since breakfast and lunch, but she still seems quiet. I can't wrap my finger around it, Tíno."

"You're right about that, Juli.""Have you checked on her?"

"Not yet, I thought I should get my wrist healed before doing so." With that, Julieta whipped her head around only to be greeted with her husband's beat-up sight. His hair was ruffled, his head bruised in some areas and just like his description, his wrist was broken and swelling red, she'd been so caught up in her thinking that she hadn't even noticed the limp hand dangling around her waist! "Mirabel wouldn't want to see her papá in such a state."

"Ay, Agustín." Exasperated, she snatched a hidden supply of arepas from her apron and shoved it into his mouth, patting him on the cheek like she always does. With a gracias corazón, she spoke again. "What happened to you?"

He gave her a sheepish grin. "I slammed face-first into a wall."

"How did that break your wrist?" she sputtered at the absurdity.

"Your guess is as good as mine."

She raised her hands in the air and turned, walking to the kitchen door. Agustín internally cursed at the loss of contact from his esposo. "I'm going to check on her."

She took a step, two–

"I'm coming with y – ACK!" he tripped over – literally nothing in particular, just the air – and landed with a hard thud on the concrete floor.

She turned and sighed, hands on her hips. It's not even 10 in the evening yet he's gotten into 6 accidents tonight. Walking over to his frame, she assisted him in standing upright, not even bothering to see his injuries over. She handed him another snack before taking him by the hand, anything to ensure this silly man doesn't get himself hurt again, and shutting the kitchen lights off.

Ay.

Unexpectedly, the tiles under their feet began to shuffle as Casita ushered them out of the kitchen faster. The casa seemed determined to complete its mission, so she didn't protest. Instead, she made sure her esposo wouldn't fall flat on his face again as they glided across the floor.

"Casita?"

~~~~

In the five years Mirabel has been living in Casita, wrestling with the house isn't one of the things she ever thought of doing over a packing session. At least her prima had already turned in for the night, so she didn't have to worry about being heard as she caused a ruckus in the nursery.

"Casita, I'm about to go on a trip tonight. Help me out!" she huffed when the house bounced her back on her bed, hiding the items she'd been secretly planning to take with her.

Her bedro–the nursery is currently in such a messy state, clothes strewn everywhere rooting from her–the dresser, tiny shoes scattered and missing pairs, her blankets hanging atop some of the tall furniture to keep her from leaving.

"Casita, this is for the best! I'll return tomorrow morning and the days to come will be filled with surprises for mi familia! That way, everyone will be happy with me again.

"The house responded by moving the windowsill disapprovingly.

Mirabel bit her lip as she thought of ways to convince the casa to set her free.

Camilo!

Even before his ceremony, he's got one of the best convincing skills out of everyone in the whole Encanto! She remembered the way he'd showcase his adorable puppy eyes at Tia Pepa, scrunching his brows and pouting, resulting in him getting his way, or when he'd use his words to manipulate her mamá into giving him another serving of his favorite food.

Tia Julieta, would you want your sobrino to go hungry? I'm a growing boy with growing needs!

To which her mamá would respond with a just one, don't tell your mamá then she'd ruffle his hair and send him off as if nothing had ever happened. Maybe, just maybe, it'd work with their live casa too.

"You wouldn't want me breaking the rules, would you? The nursery is for babies, and I'm no baby! I'm a big girl who can handle herself, especially after my gift ceremony.

"Another low shuffle, but this time, of the floorboards.

"Abuela said I can't sleep here anymore. Shouldn't we follow her orders?" She tried her best to impersonate Camilo's cutesy eyes at the house, internally crossing her fingers that it'd be enough to convince the house.A beat of silence.

Before she knew it, her bags were being pushed out from the walls and set neatly at her feet with everything she had packed inside. She smiled wide and kissed the wall. "Gracias Casita!"

It actually worked.

She made a mental note to use this method whenever she wanted to play with Isabela or Luisa, or if she wanted her papá to continue with another song on the piano, if she wanted her Tia Pepa to make another rainbow or if–She shook the distracting thoughts off. Focus is what she needs! Focus!

The house, although incredibly reluctant, responded with another shift of the wooden floor as Mirabel carried on with her packing. She wouldn't need much, just the necessities for one night. Blankets, socks, a small pillow, extra clothes, and of course, her butterfly stuffed animal. All she needed now were healing snacks. Of course, finding them wouldn't be a problem. The only issue is that her mamá is known for staying in the kitchen to clean up and prepare for the next day, even late in the evening. Dodging her will be a challenge, knowing her mami would freak out if she ever got caught and found something suspicious in her mannerisms.

Her eyes gleamed when a small hatch in the wall opened, revealing a little box neatly packed with arepas and jugged milk. "Gracias!" she squealed, before shoving said box into her bag.

Now, all she had to do was ensure nobody was outside, and slip outside the front doors. Easy.

Is this considered running away? Well, maybe. But it’s different because she’s coming back! Besides, she's doing it for a good reason! Abuela had a point; Madrigal children aren't supposed to stay in the nursery after their ceremony. Sadly, getting a darn gift was the only way to make her Abuela proud, and yet it had failed, she had failed in making her familia proud. Yes, she's a little terrified of leaving at night, especially when her mamá repeated to her time and time again not to, since that's when mosquitoes are most active and she might get bitten by a bug carrying some sort of disease. But this little camping trip could be another way to make them happy after the public humiliation they had faced during her ceremony, to fulfill her promise to her mami of being a strong and brave girl! She inhaled deeply.

For la familia Madrigal.

With that, she ever so gently creaked the door open and peaked left, then right.

Clear.

No sounds were heard, except the loud echoing of crickets around the house. Shutting the door behind her, she camouflaged herself with the teal and lavender flowers Isabela had grown a while back, looking down into the courtyard for any figure to avoid. It was dark, only being lit by a handful of candles in the corner along with the welcoming moonlight. It was on moments like these when she'd thank her mami for giving birth to her early because that resulted in her small size. If not through vision, the only way to spot Mirabel is through sound, easy enough. Casita moved some tiles as if to tell her to be careful.

"I'll be okay, Casita. I'm a big girl now," she whispered as she quietly slipped down the stairs, mindful as to not make a peep despite the coast being clear. She's super close, she can't mess up now! Not after her huge mistake the previous night.

Finally, finally, she reached the front door. Her ears ringing with bells, she thought about what the next morning would bring. This is it, when she comes back the next morning, her family will be here to greet her and cheer for her bravery. Tomorrow, she'd be given a tight hug from everyone with proud faces instead of concerned and anxious ones. She can already feel the sweet taste of victory coursing through her veins, giving her a giant sense of control. She wasn't able to control herself during her ceremony, but now, with this big decision, she's able to! With her slowly widening smile, she reached for the golden doorknob and felt a rush of déjà vu, like when she touched her doorknob. The single action that could've given her a gift, if done right.

"What do you think you're doing, young lady?"

~~~~

Gripping her now healed husband's hand with great determination to prevent him from tripping, they exited the kitchen as the tiles underneath suddenly came to a halt at the side of the courtyard.

It's either her eyes were playing tricks on her or she's just incredibly exhausted, either way, she's pretty certain that a ball of curly brown hair appeared in her peripheral vision to her left for a short moment.

She craned her head in the direction of where she thought the weird encounter was and froze, squeezing – maybe even breaking – his hand as she clutched him tight. Agustín thankfully didn't react and seemed to sense her instant rigidness.

"Amor?" he softly called out to her, his facial features writing concerned and matching her vibe as he turned to what she had her gaze on.

Then, he saw it.

Their five-year-old hija carrying a bag half her size and reaching for the door. On any day, this wouldn't seem irregular, mainly because their little Mirabel loved playing outside and chasing mariposas with some snacks from Julieta. The sight would never stop melting their hearts. Still, it doesn't change the fact that everyone in the family has a curfew. Nobody is allowed to leave their casa after dinner, to avoid wild animals and diseases being transmitted. But seeing Mirabel slowly turn the knob – with no lamp to scare off possible predators – snapped them out of their little awe-struck moment, Julieta was the first one to recover.

Putting her hands on her hips, she channeled her rarely-used inner strict voice and spoke. "What do you think you're doing, young lady?"

Mirabel jumped, turning in their direction in an instant and accidentally dropping her bag. The piece of fabric hit the tiles with a soft thud as the well-packed food escaped the folds, exposing the other items within her sack. Their eyes traveled over Mirabel, then to the scattered things on the floor, then back at her. Piecing together what could be their worst nightmare.

Mirabel? Running away?

Agustín almost choked up at the mere thought and without even looking over, he could tell Julieta was willing herself not to cry.

They understood now that she had been trying to get away, to somehow correct the non-existent mistakes she made during her ceremony, the regret creeping in like snakes slowly slithering behind their prey. It further confirmed their suspicions when a box with Julieta's specially baked food slipped out, revealing the additional goods stuffed inside the sack Mirabel was carrying. The items that she’d bring to her dangerous voyage outside and at night.

As they stood frozen in silence, Julieta was the first to break it, transitioning from a strict mami to a comforting mami. She ran over to Mirabel and enveloped her in a tight embrace as Agustín joined them in a millisecond. "Ay, mi vida, you don't have to leave just because you're different."

That seemed to hit a sensitive spot, as Mirabel collapsed into their warm arms, her sobs muffled by Julieta's thick apron. "I'm s-sorry m-mamá, papá. I thought I w-was making you p-proud." she heaved and shook, clutching onto both of their clothes.

"Mira, we're already proud of you. You have nothing to prove." Julieta held her in a death grip, hoping she wouldn’t accidentally crush her mariposa.

"But Abuela said that I shouldn't sleep in the nursery anymore because I'm a big girl and I already had my ceremony and that I should sleep somewhere else and you said I was brave so I thought I could sleep outside to be your big brave girl!" she practically rapped and sobbed, dropping the forgotten bag on the floor.

Ah, so she had heard.

"Mi amor, listen to me." Julieta pulled back and stared straight into Mirabel's puffy red eyes as Agustín remained unmoving, still clutching her despite the shift in motion. "Being brave – which you already are –" she emphasized her point by lightly tapping her nose, earning the smallest of smiles. "doesn't mean running away and endangering yourself. We don't do those two things, okay?" a nod. "Not everything your Abuela says is right, she's human too, she has moments where she's wrong. Venturing into the wilderness to search for your own room isn't a good idea, corazón. Since you didn't receive your own room, the nursery is all yours. Do you understand?"

Mirabel looked up at her from under her eyelashes as her lower lip wobbled again, water gathering at her eyes once more. "Lo s-siento." she dove back into both her parent's loving embrace and let all the emotions pour out, all the stress, all the pent-up emotions in just one day.

She's got a long road ahead.

"Está bien, mi bebé. Don't cry."

~~~~

As they tucked in for the night, Julieta glanced over to her right, where Mirabel had been asleep on the nursery bed for a good duration, snoring ever so slightly. Ay, the snoring from all her babies is definitely something they took after her esposo, without a doubt. But she wouldn’t change that for the world; she adores all of them equally. She thought about today's events and smiled once her hijas question echoed in her head again.

Can you sleep with me again, mamá y papá?

To which they agreed without a second thought. Another sleepover with one of their hijas? They wouldn't miss it for anything.

"What's your mamá going to think once she finds out you gave Miraboo full ownership of the nursery?"

"What is she going to do? Kick Mirabel out? She isn't that heartless, mi vida."

He let out a laugh. "You did it, Juli. You didn't even need my help when talking to our mariposa back there." Agustín held her hand from under the sheets, meeting her eyes with a soft smile before gently meeting her lips.

She smirked. "It was mother's intuition."

"Hey! What about father's intuition? I was the one that forced you to leave the kitchen just in time to catch Mirabel."

"Did you trip on purpose just to guide me out of the kitchen?" she looked appalled, her brows raised.

He gave a light-hearted chuckle. "Well, yes. It's what I've been doing since we got married. Besides, Casita indirectly helped me out too!"

"You're banned from setting foot in my kitchen, including my bedroom.”

Which is ironic. Julieta's room is basically a personal kitchen with extra comfortable furniture.

One, two, three-

"Amor, your room doesn't count!"

Ay Agustín.

...

Thanks for readingg

#julieta madrigal #agustin madrigal #mirabel madrigal #fluff #domestic fluff #family dynamics #hurt/comfort #mother/daughter relationship #father/daughter relationship #sibling bonding #pre-canon #encanto #wikluk #adabofblessings #AAAAA I LOVE YOU GUYS!#author wrote this instead of sleeping #how did this only take 3 days to finish-#tthank you to wikluk for the story idea #i hope this satisfies you aaaaaaa

139 notes · View notes

bearsinpotatosacks · 6 months

Text

In A Room Void of Colour - Whumptober2023

Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

In another universe, Nick Bradshaw didn't die during Hop 31. This doesn't automatically mean that Carole lives too.

For day 16 of @whumptober . Also on AO3

Words: 734

Nick had spent enough time in hospitals now to be sick of them. He hated the smell. The fact that there wasn't one, it was the absence of it that he hated. The absence of everything, smells, comfort, home. Life. It sapped everything away. It was why he’d wanted Carole to die at home. Comfortable, in her own clothes, her blanket on her body, their garden outside and their life they'd built together. Not here. In a room void of colour and joy.

Not that there would be much joy if they were at home.

"Nick," she whispered from the hospital bed. "Nicky, I'm cold."

Bradley shifted up on the other side of the bed. He hadn’t slept well at all recently. They were both glad it was the summer though, he didn’t have to sit through classes, and Nick didn't have to argue with teachers about why he wasn't going to be in school.

"Here honey, have my jacket,"

He shrugged off the big jumper he was wearing and laid it on her lithe frame. She already had the hospital sheet and a blanket. She'd lost so much weight these last few months, she almost didn't look like herself. Her hair all gone, skin yellow, jaundiced from where the cancer had spread to her liver. He hated it, hated it all.

She grabbed his hand and gestured for Bradley to come closer. "I love you, both of you."

His heart almost stopped beating. This was the end, wasn't it? He wasn't ready. He didn’t want to say goodbye to her yet. He wasn’t ready for his wife to die.

"You've got to look after each other, you hear?" She said, tears began to run down her face, gaunt from sickness. "I'll be there, watching down on you, looking after you all I can but you two have got to do that too."

Bradley nodded. Tears made his face shine as he held her hand against his cheek. Nick held it like a lifeline, as if him holding it would keep her alive. If he could just perform a miracle then everything would be okay.

"I love you so much, honey, more than anything, okay?" She said to Goose.

"I love you to the moon and back," he managed to say, his throat was clogged up from crying.

She then turned to Bradley, "And you, you'll always be my baby boy."

He nodded. There was too much emotion for him to reply. He was sobbing into her hand. They’d all kept this moment as a far off thing, something they would happen. Now it was here and none of them knew what to say.

"You remember that, my baby boy will always be there so you better look after yourself because I won't be able to."

"I don't want you to go," he sobbed.

"I don't wanna go either but it's just my-" she began to cough but forced herself to finish her sentence. "It's just my time."

She couldn’t hold back her coughing anymore. She sat up and the familiar sound of her hacking her lungs up took over. The sound still went through him, despite the fact that he'd heard it for months.

"Just sit back for a second, okay?"

Nick lent her back and knew by the look in her eyes that this was it. Bradley stood up too, still holding her hand with white knuckles. Goose stroked her cheek as she struggled to catch her breath.

"It's okay," he choked. "Just focus on me honey, you can go now, I've got you."

Her breath wheezed as her eyes flicked between him and Bradley. Fear and calm washing and melting together. She kept panting, the tubes in her nose doing nothing for her as her eyes began to unfocus and her breath get soft enough that he could barely hear it.

The heart monitor flatlined before he realised that her eyes had stopped on him, before he'd noticed the light go. Her last breath rattled against his face, cold. Her skin went dull and body limp as Bradley's knees gave way.

Nick moved around the bed to him and held him as the world ended. He grabbed his shirt as he sobbed into his shoulder, he felt it getting wetter with his tears and didn’t care. They were all they had now. He had to hold him while the world ended.

---

Sad :( . The last fic I'm doing for Whumptober is a follow on from this, and is equally sad. Also Bradley, my baby, he's just a sad, hurt kid in canon, all angry and I can imagine a hug from Carole would break all that anger and bravado and just make him cry. So here he is crying. Thanks for reading! @whumptober-archive

2 notes · View notes

showrunnerihardlyknowher · 2 years

Note

🤒 for characters of your choice!

Everything hurt. Their head, their chest, their throat – just about every battered muscle on their body was either throbbing with a dull ache constantly or sending sharp stings of pain when they shifted. Such an aftermath on their physical being was to be expected after the night of crime fighting Nano had the pleasure of experiencing, especially when they were severely outnumbered. It was a miracle, and a damn impressive one at that, that the hero even made it home in one piece despite taking on four artificially superpowered henchmen on their own. Sure, maybe they almost drowned after their six inch tall self was launched off the old boating dock into the freezing bay due to being winded, but they didn’t die and at the end of the day that’s all that mattered.

“You realize I could have killed you fifteen minutes ago.”

Well, if Nano thought they craved the sweet release of death before, they were practically begging for it now. They groaned at the unwanted intrusion and buried their face into the cushion of their hand-me-down couch. Fucking Negasonic. All Nano wanted to do after a crappy night of making the world a smidgen of a better place was to do absolutely nothing as they had no energy to spare. This was evident by the fact they hadn’t even bothered to fully undress themself from their soaked costume when they staggered home, only shrinking down to a few inches tall so that their well worn couch became a massive bed and tossing their helmet somewhere across it before conking out.

Sleeping in a cold, wet, dirty suit and not washing any of the gunk out of the wounds they sustained was probably one of the major reasons Nano felt twice as worse as usual. And because they were so pitifully useless and inept at taking care of themself, Negasonic’s ‘Dumbass Sense’ must have been going ballistic, prompting the supervillain to make an unwelcome house call to Nano’s humble abode. They hadn’t even heard him come in, not that he would have announced his presence or anything. He probably didn’t even knock, and Nano wasn’t a hundred percent sure they’d actually remembered to lock the door when they got home to begin with. Oops, that was probably going to be a lecture in and of itself.

Nano was going to say something, either something snarky or the more logical why are you in my home? but they were interrupted by a harsh coughing fit that made their chest throb with each labored breath. So much for trying to be a smartass.

“Good to know you’re feeling as terrible as you look,” Negasonic said after Nano quieted down to pained wheezing. “Was it worth getting your ass kicked?”

Of course it was. Despite the beating they had gotten as a result of the unbalanced scuffle, Nano single handedly managed to apprehend all four of the henchmen by themself, no backup needed. It was an incredible feeling of pride and accomplishment, a sense of justice coursing through them alongside adrenaline that made Nano want to get back out on the streets and clean up all the crime in one day. Unfortunately, their body was quick to protest once the high of success wore off and all their physical functions came crashing down. They’ll resume their plan of world peace in a week or so…

Rather than get into another debate over morals and human nature when they could barely hold onto a coherent thought for longer than a minute, Nano cracked open an eye to glare up at Negasonic. He was leaning over the back of the couch to idly stare down at the sick hero, unmasked but still fully dressed in his own uniform.

They swallowed down another cough which only served to irritate their throat. “Did you…come to my apartment dressed like that?” Great, because that was just what Nano needed, for everyone to see one of the most renowned supervillains walking into a shitty apartment complex and barging in to see a very specific occupant. To think Negasonic often got on their case for not being subtle enough when it came to civilian identities!

“I thought I’d drop by,” Negasonic shrugged, which was his way of saying he had just done something very illegal before paying Nano a visit. If their body wasn’t already racked with shivers, they were sure they’d feel a tremble down their spine. “I like your neighbors. They mind their business.”

They had to. You don’t live in these kinds of low rent apartments in the middle of one of the city’s worst crime capitals by being a snitch. You see something, you say nothing. Honestly, that was probably why Nano had been figured out sooner given how much of their superhero crap they kept hidden around the apartment. Nano groaned again when they felt something brush against their forehead, causing the ache behind their eyes to increase under the gentle pressure. When they pulled away from the touch, they realized it was Negasonic’s now ungloved hand that had been touching them. Though he usually ran hot, as courtesy of his sizzling energy power under his skin, the supervillain’s fingers felt like ice to Nano. It was kind of nice actually now that the headache no longer accompanied it.

Based on the frown Negasonic gave them, he didn’t agree. “Your fever’s gone up.” Which implied that Negasonic had checked previously for a fever as Nano hadn’t bothered to notice their spiking temperature.

Negasonic pulled away from where he was hovering above Nano and suddenly they felt the childish urge to call for him to come back. To come closer, to stay. It was rather pathetic that in the haze of sickness they were trying to seek out the need for comfort from a cold hearted supervillain, but sometimes you need to work with what you have. Besides, Negasonic had taken care of Nano before for an extended period of time. And also liked to swoop in and save them from dire situations. And in general stalked them even when they were both out of uniform to make sure Nano’s heart didn’t give out from living off high sodium instant noodles for nine days straight.

The man was a mother hen whether he admitted it or not, and then he had the gall to be surprised when Nano latched onto him like a baby chick.

“I’m going out to get you some acetaminophen before you get worse. Your first aid kits that I found should have enough pain killers to keep you from being a total pain in the ass.” Ah, Nano was getting really good at reading in between the lines of Negasonic’s vague statements. He rarely elaborated on anything because he felt he had already shared enough information necessary, which was something Nano had to learn firsthand during their weeks of healing from rib fractures.

This meant that while he was here, though Nano was passed out on the couch, he had rummaged through their belongings to ensure they had proper medical supplies on hand. Not only that, but if he was double checking that they had a good amount of ibuprofen to keep them from complaining too much, then he must be planning on sticking around for a little while longer until Nano was no longer at death’s door. That made them feel…oddly relieved. Not that they couldn’t take care of themself just fine on their own, after all it wasn’t the first time they’d come down with a nasty cold or flu while living alone.

The sharp snap of Negasonic’s fingers drew their attention back to the supervillain that was now standing on the other side of the couch. Huh. When had he moved? Wasn’t he just talking to Nano a moment ago? Christ, they must be out of it if they were already teetering on the edge of slipping back into another fever sleep.

“Kid, look at me,” Nano tried to comply as best they could. Negasonic was so big and dark and warm, all those thoughts urging them to close their eyes to sleep again. “I’m going to be back in twenty minutes. When I get back I want you full sized, out of your costume, and showered. Do you understand?”

Yes, Nano understood those words and their meanings, but the order itself was lost on them. That sounded like a lot of work that required an ungodly amount of stamina the tiny hero simply didn’t have to spare. Therefore, they would not be doing any of that. They were quite content to lie motionless where they were for the next three to five days.

“Mm…” was the answer Nano gave, which was definitely not the sir, yes, sir the supervillain was looking for.

Negasonic narrowed his glowing eyes. “Either you do it yourself or I’m going to do it for you.”

Nano was fumbling for their helmet before Negasonic was even out the front door.

#g/t #ask #bittykimmy13 #macro/micro #giant/tiny #gianttiny #g/t ocs #oc nano #oc negasonic #batman rip off #g/t writing #size difference #g/t fluff #my writing #sfw g/t #g/t superheroes

44 notes · View notes

the-walk-of-weary-souls · 8 months

Text

So I've had this idea of an Avatar fic in which the Sully Twins both make it to Pandora as well as arriving a lot younger than Jake does in cannon. Reading a fic that is almost exactly this same scenario just made this idea shoot right back to the top of my thoughts again. Unfortunately I have two main ideas that have been bouncing around in my head and I can't decide which one I like more so I turn to you. So for my story they were either born on Pandora or taken to Pandora while they were still pretty young.

(So sorry but I really can't resist making it m/m but that won't affect this summary/ idea pitch at all just warning those who are interested in possibly reading this if I write and publish it. Even if you're not interested in m/m feel free to read this and take inspiration)

(Option 1: Born on Pandora)

Army Nurse Camille Sully was only married to the love of her life for four months when tragedy struck leaving her widowed. Her husband however managed to secure her the opportunity to go to Pandora, a planet he'd enamoured her to with his constant gushing stories about it. Though it hurt to go alone seeing as she had planned to go with her husband before his demise, she couldn't bare to stay on this dead planet that had taken everything including her husband from her. Besides it felt wrong to waste her husbands last gift to her, or well as she would later learn his second last gift to her.

Thus she embarks on the long journey to Pandora sinking into a deep Cyro sleep completely unaware of the absolutely miniscule lives that had taken root in her belly. By some miracle the babies are perfectly healthy despite the six year delay to their should've been due date, though they are a little odd...

In this AU Jake and Tommy become the first human babies born on Pandora and are to be sent back to earth with their mother as soon as their bodies are able to handle the trip, only for the head of SciOps at the time to hear of them and get some ideas. Children are the most adaptable of humans after all. RDA quickly jumps onboard with this idea.

As an effect of experiencing cyrosleep at such a premature age the twins are a little bit like mediums. Not sure exactly how far I'd take this medium idea but it could be anywhere from connecting to eywa easier to literally seeing the dead, or being like natural shamans seeing the natural spirits around them. Once again not sure how far I'll take this 'sensitivity'

The humans utilise the young Sully's to try and get closer to/manipulate the Na'vi seeing how weak they are to children. Even making avatars that grow with the twins for them.

The RDA are really scummy and basically hide the fact that the twins even exist from Earth to avoid legal trouble and press backlash. Though they are confident that even if the twins birth is discovered they can haggle their way out of trouble eventually.

Their mother is not happy with them being used as basically science experiments but can't do much as they threaten to send her back to earth and have an 'accident' happen on the way back.

This story is definitely closer to cannon with Camille actually being the Sully Twins Mom (At least according to Wikipedia) but in fanfiction Canon should be played with so I don't really care that the twins base backstory varies so much from cannon in the second idea

(Option 2: Young Sully Twins go to Pandora)

Only thirteen years old The Sully twins are not in a good place. Orphaned and in a pretty awful foster home with way too many foster children in it. The two are practically only one step above homeless if not even worse off thanks to the ever rampant crime they face in their daily life.

They're desperate to get out so desperate in fact that when strange official looking doctors come to test all the people in the area and return to the twins with an offer a couple weeks later, they're less cautious then they probably should be.

By pure chance the first batch of Avatars candidates contains one candidate with a gene which allows them to bond with their avatar body with ease. RDA being greedy corporate Scum see this as the optimal way to avoid losing millions to the occasional dud avatar.

Tommy and Jake are 13 and living in a crowded foster home when they test positive for this gene, RDA greedy and corrupt as they are, aren't against coercing and practically kidnaping them to utilise said genes.

In this AU foster care has gotten worse and worse with clearly unfit candidates not only easily getting foster kids but also greatly financially benefiting from it and foster homes that easily slip inspection. The twins live in an overcrowded foster home with awful living conditions, disgusting and often non filling food, nausea inducing bathrooms, little to no helpful adult monitoring as well as the house being dead centre in the less desirable part of the city.

This story is a lot about the twins learning that not everyone want's to use them while still having an intimate understanding of the dark underbelly of humanity.

Eventually the twins (And maybe a few others) bond so well with their avatars that they are able to link even without machinery though there is still a limit to how long they can stay without ill effect. They have increased this limit drastically but inevitably they always have to return to their human bodies.

In this version the Twins harbour a muuuuch deeper resentment for the RDA because this isn't the only thing they know.

The humans utilise the young Sully's to try and get closer to/manipulate the Na'vi in this idea too, though in this version the Na'vi only end up horrified by the state of these two younglings and are sort of praying for the day where they can just yoink them and give them all the love an affection they deserve and more.

#avatar #avatar james cameron #na'vi #jake sully #thomas sully #tommy sully #avatar rda #sully twins #the rda suck #and not even in a fun way #not me an asexual making dirty jokes and giggling like a little girl

5 notes · View notes

trials-of-a-spirit-worker · 1 year

Text

Yet Another Lesson on Grief

Because it seems like the universe is hellbent on kicking the shit out of me right now...we get another lesson on grief.

Grief doesn't have to come after your loved one dies. Sometimes, you're in a position where it's hopeless and you have to watch the one you love, slowly go.

It can be a long and painful process and there's a whole new uniqueness in grief in this case.

Fortunately and Unfortunately, I'm no stranger to this feeling too. Fortunate for you, because I know how to help you in this case. Unfortunate because I'm literally bracing for the loss of my grandfather, working through tears and forcing myself to stay sober through it.

In these situations, it's better to prepare and accept what's to come. Denial and Grief are not anywhere close to similar despite them often coming together, but denial can act as grief.

What I mean by that is, many people tend to try and convince themselves terminally ill loved ones will get better by some miracle, almost as if they forget what a miracle is.

How rare they are. How it only prolongs suffering and the inevitable. To deny is to forget.

And it's only temporary. Painfully temporary.

But it's so damn easy, which is why so many do it. It's easier to have foolish ideas of hoping for a miracle that everything will undo, or they'll be here longer, rather than to weigh themselves into reality. And I'm talking about where it's at the point of no return inevitable. If there's a chance—a damn good one of your loved one or friend coming back from whatever is ailing them, I truly hope they do recover. But it's still a good idea to brace for it getting worse, because that's always a possibility. Reality is hard. Dealing with the fact someone you love or are close with is dying right in front of you is fucking agony.

Preparing and Accepting is so ridiculously hard. And it's much better to start as soon as you can. Because it's a long process, a long, long, process to even make progress on it and you will find yourself backtracking on it.

You'll call it negative, cruel, stupid to even try and understand the fact that they are going to die. You'll find yourself believing you're harping on the fact and that it's doing nothing but hurting yourself.

It's not. You're just hurting because you care. And that's nothing to be ashamed of. You're preparing because you don't want to lose yourself to sorrow. You're accepting it so you can grieve in a healthier way. Both you and the person leaving you deserve your healthy grieving.

I'm not saying it's going to stop you from bawling your eyes out. Absolutely not. I've had to type this out in parts purely because I was breaking down in-between paragraphs. Although this will help you, it won't make you "stronger" in the sense a lot people think. I doubt you'll be the rock to keep everyone together when it happens, or even have it completely keep you from falling into possible bad habits out of grief. It's not a fix-all in the slightest.

Think of this like a seatbelt in a car crash. You still might be hurt in the end, but you didn't fly out the windshield.

I'm trying to tell you to prepare and accept it because nothing you do, will stop death from coming. Honor the life, honor the time you have left. Honor them. Embrace them. Cherish them.

Do it before you have to let them go. Kill the blow as much as you can. Then when the time does come, and eventually it will.

Let go.

Letting go doesn't mean you don't care. Not in the slightest. Letting go means accepting reality. Letting go means you've acknowledged the impact they had on your life.

Letting go is key to moving forward. For both of you.

Like I said in my previous grief post, the pain never goes away, it just hurts a little less over time. You never stop caring. You never stop loving them. And you shouldn't.

Death can't take your love you had for them. It can only take the body. That is another thing to accept and I found it's far easier to belief that and accept that than anything else.

Grief will come when it wants. But...I truly hope you can work with it and keep moving forward.

And hopefully, in the end....you'll be able to see them again, when your time is said and done.

Also, one last thing. And it's incredibly important:

You don't have to do this alone. In fact, you shouldn't go through this alone. Friends, other loved ones, hell a fucking therapist. Anyone can help you work through this. A lot of the preparing and acceptance is a mental battle and a struggle yes. But I can't tell you how beneficial it is to have someone to hold you through it. To have others talk about fun memories that dying person and all of you shared. To laugh recalling the life you had wit that person. To acknowledge the pain of that coming to an end.

In these cases, the person dying is also grieving too. If you both can handle it, work on healing and accepting together. Never deal with this alone if you can help it.

Be held, scream. Sob, work it out with those you trust. Just don't hold it in and don't suffer alone.

Call HOPE - tel:833-317-4673

Mental Health Hotlines:

It's UP to Us- Hotline tel:8887247240

Crisis Text Line - Text HOME to 741-741 in the U.S.

Pet Loss and Bereavement Resource Line (855) 352-5683

#death witch #dealing with grief #witchblr #witchcraft #advice #grief and loss #death mention tw #resources at the bottom

6 notes · View notes

lyxthen · 1 year

Text

I'm thinking about Princess Kaguya again. And how she left, how she got her eternal blissfullness, surrounded by her people, going home, to the place before life. She came to earth and she suffered, she suffered time and time again, she was broken, and at her darkest moment she begged to the moon and said "let me go back to that time before life. Let me have peace. Let me be free of my heart." And once she said that, her fate was sealed, and no matter how much she longed to live, how much she loved, she had to go. And they came for her, they came to her aid, and she was now heartless. Sorrowless and loveless. Cold. Indifferent.

Thinking about Eurydice. Thinking about her cold body in the snow, as Hades approaches her, and he offers her food and safety and a warmth. Thinking about how she never got that before. How much she longed "a nice soft place to land" and to "lay down forever" . How not even love could made her stay, how she willingly singed her life away. But even in death, she was restless. And she longed for the earth above, for her lover and for the sun, but even as he came down for her, her fate was sealed. It is a sad tale.

Thinking about Frodo leaving Middle Earth. Thinking about how he gave in, how he fell for the Ring, and he always knew he would. Thinking about the helplessness, the weight of the knowledge that you are going to die. And you are oh so sure you are going to die. How do you go on there? He knew he would claim the Ring for himself, he knew he would die chasing after it, in the lava, just like Maedhros before him. And when he didn't die, he was left so hollow, not even love could save him. And he left, because the world wasn't for him. And what was of him, in the Undying lands? How could he ever heal a wound so deep, without forgetting? And if he forgot the suffering he went thought, did he forget about his dear Sam, his Dearest? His Lúthien? The nightingale, the bird that sings in the dead of night, the one Persephone sang praise to.

Thinking of Gregor Samsa. He wasn't even a person, he was too broken to be loved. He was harmless, but useless, and is there a greater sin than uselessness? He died, to bring his family peace. To bring himself peace. To end their suffering, and his own suffering. He was too far gone, he too did not belong to the world.

Thinking about Shinji Ikari. Thinking about how it was his fault the world ended. Thinking about all the people that longed for connection and peace, to be one with each other, to get rid of the self and be part of the world, even of that meant they wouldn't be themselves anymore. All they wanted to know was eternity, peace, and the lengths they went through to achieve it. Thinking about Shinji helplessly stuck in his EVA, longing for that connection. Thinking about how it all came to an end. He was broken, and the world was destroyed, but even then. Even then he chose to live. Even then, he chose to stay. Despite the pain. Despite the isolation, the loneliness inherent to individuality. Despite the fact there wasn't even a world to come back to in the first place, even then he chose to stay. He chose to stay and suffer. He may never be happy, but he is willing to accept that, because life, life on earth is a gift that can't be thrown away. Self-awareness is a miracle. Even when pain is endless, to be yourself is just so wonderful. "Despite everything, it's still you"

It's me. I am still me. I am here. I am awake. I can feel. And this is the only chance I'll ever get. I may be broken. I may not belong to the world at all. But I will choose to stay time and time again. Even if its a tragedy. Even if I never know happiness ever again. I will stay, for the sake of myself.

2 notes · View notes

gareleia · 2 years

Text

Of lullabies and lost puppies

Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood

Word count: 2585

Relationships: Alphonse Elric & Edward Elric

Tags: Post-Promised Day, Hospitals, Fluff, Childhood Memories, Light Angst, Hopeful Ending.

Summary: Following the events of the Promised Day, Alphonse is stuck in a hospital. To cheer him up, Edward starts telling stories.

Read on AO3

"Hey, Al?" Ed whispers, in case he's dozed off again.

It's not that big of a stretch, considering that Alphonse doesn't usually stay awake for more than an hour at a time, and even then he's all quiet and groggy and tired and not all there. The doctors say it's not too concerning, that his body just needs to build up strength again and in a few months he'll be right as rain.

Ed still worries though. How can he not, when his brother lies there, all brittle bones and paper-thin skin? Every time he looks at Alphonse he has to fight the instinct to wrap him up in a bone-crushing hug and never let go. The only thing that's currently stopping him is the knowledge that with how fragile the boy is at the moment, he just might literally crush a bone or something.

And so, Ed refrains. Holds the skeletal hand with gentleness he never knew he possessed, places feather-light kisses on the hollow cheeks, whispers comforts and assurances when they're needed - and that is all too often, because in his years in the armor Al forgot how to deal with nightmares. For now, it has to be enough.

And it is. Honestly, Ed would be content simply watching from afar, basking in the glow of the wonder that is his brother, alive and breathing. The fact that he's allowed to be here, despite all his faults and sh-shortcomings, is a miracle. He's so fucking happy he could cry - has cried, multiple times, when he knew nobody was watching. He gets delightfully lightheaded every time he thinks of how it's all finally over.

They won.

"Brother?"

Al is looking at him with half-closed, clouded eyes and he does this adorable little yawn and truth this is all he's ever wanted and more.

"Still here" As if he's ever leaving his side again "How was your nap?"

Alphonse yawns again and stretches as much as his atrophied muscles let him. Ed wishes he had a camera.

"Wasn't sleeping. Just thinking. I'm bored."

"Sure you weren't" A grin. "We could read, if you want. They don't have any books here, which is weird, but I managed to negotiate a bunch of old magazines from the nurses. It's not much and they're mostly pictures, but we could make fun of old-people fashion. Maybe find something for Mustang's retirement party, he's so ancient that it could be any day now."

"Brother, be nice!" Al giggles, and he counts it as a win."

The day I'm nice to that bastard is the day I've finally lost my mind. If that ever happens, I fully expect you to spare us both the embarrassment and put me out of my misery."

"Ed!" His brother scolds and ouch.

"Sorry, Al. Too soon?"

"It'll always be too soon. Stop talking nonsense and tell me another story."

"Well, if you insist..."

They've been at it for days now. With Al too weak to do anything besides talking and sleeping, and Ed too paranoid to leave him alone for more than five minutes at a time, they didn't have much else to do to pass the time. Ed could get real books if he wanted - plenty of people who visited them brought gifts and care packages. But... It's selfish, he knows, but for now he wants to keep Alphonse to himself. In this little hospital room with just the two of them where everything is alright in the world and nothing else matters - not fights, not politics and not even alchemy.

"Actually... Do you remember the time we almost got a dog?"

"What?" Al chokes a little. "No! When did that happen?"

"Figures" Ed chuckles. "You were really young. Like, barely two? It's kinda fuzzy on the timeline, but B-Hohenheim was still there."

(He's so not unpacking that now)

"You were a really fussy baby, you know. It was like you had it all figured out already, what you wanted to eat, wear and do, and god forbid we got it wrong or happened to be in the way of your 'Big Plans' or something. You'd go all red and start screaming your head off until we managed to decipher which little thing offended your gentle sensibilities this time."

"Are you sure you remember right?" Al interrupts, cheeks flushed, "I think you're confusing us. I'm the quiet one."

"Yeah, right" Ed snorts. "You weren't very quiet back then. Babies are loud in general, but you took it to the whole new level. I'm pretty sure I learned how to walk just to get away from your wailing. All the neighbors knew when you were upset, and I'm sure the entire Resembool still remembers the Nappy Incident of 1901. Why do you think they're so nice to you all the time? Nobody wants a repeat of that."

He shudders. His poor baby eardrums. It's a good thing that Al mellowed out with age, because the world wasn't ready for two Elrics' bullshit, and Ed himself has no intention of cutting down on his own.

"Ed, the story!" His brother whines.

"Right. So. Where was I? Oh, yeah. You were a fussy baby. So one sunny day you decided that you weren't taking your naps unless either me or mom sang to you - you didn't want Hohenheim there at all, which made him depressed and pathetic until mom figured out you just didn't like his new cologne. And you wouldn't take just any song, it had to be a new one every time, or else you would start shrieking."

"Really?" Al mutters to himself, but Ed answers nonetheless.

"Uh huh. Spoiled brat." He smiles fondly and pats his head.

"So, a couple of weeks later we're running out of songs. You're in an especially bad mood that evening and it's taking me and mom a while to get you to sleep. Eventually, she has to run to the kitchen to check on the dinner and just leaves me there with my bloody siren of a brother, and I'm getting desperate. And then I remember a song I heard from the older kids, which I know you haven't heard before because it's sad as fuck. And, well, you're already upset, what do I have to lose?"

Ed sighs and runs his hand through his hair. As fondly as he remembers that day, looking back at it, he can admit it wasn't his brightest moment.

"What was the song about?" Al asks curiously. "Do you still remember it? And where does the dog come in?"

"I'm getting to it, Al." He insists. "And I don't remember the words, I was, like, three or so. But the gist of it was that a kid has lost his puppy and was looking for it. He didn't find the dog in the end, so. As I said, sad as fuck. You made it halfway through the second verse before bursting into tears. Seriously, I've never seen you cry so hard before. Of course I immediately shut up and so did you, so you'd think that all was good, right? Just forget about it and move on."

"Did I... Did I hold a grudge?" Alphonse's eyes are wide and it's the most lucid he's been in days. "Did I hold grudges as a baby?"

"You sure did," hums Ed. "But it's not what happened. As soon as I shut up, you started shaking your tiny fists and demanding I do it again."

"Why?!"

"I don't know!" He throws his hands in the air. "I didn't understand that either! I thought, maybe it was a fluke, and you cried because of something else, but as soon as I started singing you were tearing up again! So I stopped and you got angry and I said: "But you cry when I sing it!" And you insisted you weren't going to cry again if I sang, so I did and of course that was a fucking lie. So that's when I put my foot down and said I wasn't going to do it again even if you screamed. And, as always, you took that as a challenge."

"Why don't I remember this?" Al sighs faintly. "You weren't much older than me, so how do you remember it?"

"Well, duh, I was traumatized."

Al swats lazily at another headpat and Ed effortlessly catches his brother's hand between his own two palms. As he starts rubbing it carefully, Alphonse makes a pleased noise and settles down.

"So, mom rushes in with you screaming your little head off and she can't make you stop either. So she turns to me and asks what happened here in the two minutes she was gone and I do my best to explain, and she just. Loses it."

"Did she get mad?"

Edward grins.

"That's what I thought. But no, she just burst out laughing so hard she was crying. There were tears rolling down her cheeks and everything. I figured I was in trouble and began tearing up. And then you stopped yelling and started crying too. I'm sure it was a sight, all three of us like that. Dad sure thought so."

Alphonse's little squeak startles Ed out of the memory and wipes the stupidly wide smile off his face.

"What? Shit, are you okay? Did I hurt you?!"

He quickly puts Al's hand down and makes a move to get up and call a nurse, but freezes as he feels his brother's grip on his wrist. It's an objectively pathetic thing, barely tight enough to be noticeable, but it stops him in his tracks better than steel ever could.

For a second, he doesn't breathe. He knows it's irrational, but it's his brother, the most precious and important thing in the universe, and what if he hurt him-

Then,

"Ed", Alphonse says softly, almost whispers, and he sounds so heartbreakingly sad it hurts to hear. "I wish you stopped doing this to yourself. I'm okay. It's not your fault, you didn't hurt me. Please sit down."

Edward bites his lip and does as he's told.

"I'm not hurt, I was just surprised."

The interaction seems to have worn his brother out, but he still puts on a tired smile.

"Surprised by what?"

"It's nothing. Please continue."

"Fine, well, if you're sure. Just... Fine. Where were we?"

"'Dad.'"

"Oh, right. Also, I can't believe you still call him that, but you do you, I guess."

Ed crunches his nose at the thought of talking about their douchebag of a father, and Al's smile becomes even more tired and somewhat pained.

"Sorry, I'll shut up now. Anyway, Hohenheim walks in to check out the noise and finds all three of us in tears. The poor bastard looked so scared and confused. He just kind of stood there for a moment, trying to decide what to do, and then you got even louder, probably because of the cologne. And he started backing off, you know, like a coward, but then mom, who was still laughing, started making gestures at him to explain and then you threw a toy at himand holy fuck, it was glorious. His face was priceless. Eventually he just started frantically asking what he should do, what did we want from him. And you... you... oh, fuck, you just looked at him and went: "DOGGIE!"

Ed takes a second to steady his voice.

"And his face went all intense and stoic, like you just asked him to bring you the heart of a fallen star to grant you eternal youth. I swear, Al, in that moment he was a man on a mission. So he was like, "I see" and then he went out to take a breather. Mom calmed down shortly after and I don't remember how, but we finally put you to sleep. It was way past our bedtime and I was really tired myself, so I wasn't paying that much attention to what she did. And then he waltzed in with a proud smile and an actual dog under his coat."

Alphonse lets out a surprised laugh and Ed drinks the sound in, catalogs it neatly and puts it into the specific corner of his brain marked 'Reasons to live'. That box seems to be getting fuller by the day.

"I know, right? Mom was horrified. It was the middle of the night, and no one in the village has had a dog who recently gave birth, but there he was, holding a puppy and refusing to tell her where it came from. I don't remember how he managed to convince her to keep it, but in the end it didn't matter, because the next morning you woke up, saw the pup and freaked the hell out. I don't know if it was the song, or you slept funny, or you just felt like being a little shit, but you refused to tolerate her. And as much as I liked the dog, I loved you more, so it wasn't even a choice. Eventually even dad gave in and said it was best to get rid of the pup, so we gave it to our neighbors."

Al stares at him silently for a moment and he has that look on his face that Ed, to his shame, can't quite discern. Is it pity?

Still, he can pinpoint the exact moment the realization sets in.

"Wait, our father got us Den?!"

"Yup", Ed grins. "But I named her Carbon at first. Or, well, 'Ca'bon', 'cause I had trouble with the 'r'. Bonnie for short. Uncle Yuri insisted on the name change, which was dumb."

"You're dumb!" His brother sputters. "You can't name a pet after an element! Pet names are supposed to be cute! Like Fluffy or Snowflake or Sugarplum!"

Edward gives him a look full of fake pity, but he honestly couldn't care less about the god-awful names Al cooked up for his future cats.

"Nuh-uh. Pet names are supposed to be whatever gets the animals to respond and I'm telling you that Den still responds to Carbon. You can try it yourself when we go back to Resembool, and you'll see that I'm right. And when you do finally recognize my genius, you will beg me to name your cats for you. Just you wait!"

"I'm looking forward to it." Alphonse murmurs and curles up next to his arm, eyes already closing. "You'll complain about the fur."

"And the noise." He nods, smiling.

"'nd the smell."

"And it's going to be awesome."

And it is. Because they're together, and safe, and not dying, and they're going to stay that way. They're going to live long and happy lives, see the world, get married, have kids. Eat every last dish on Al's To-Try list. Rebuild their house. Die of old age.

It's an unfamiliar thought, but not an unwelcome one. Edward is a pessimist by nature, and he's not used to thinking about his own future as anything but a source of new pain, but. He could try.

For Mom.

For Alphonse.

For Winry.

For himself.

"We're going to be okay." He whispers, just to try it out, and he's in equal measure scared and excited to find that for once in his life he truly does mean it.

"We're going to be okay." He says, again - and then adds, just because he can, "Love you Al. Sleep well."

"Love you too, brother."

And if his eyes are wet, well. It's nobody else's business.

#fanfic #fmab #fluff #light angst #siblings #fullmetal alchemist #edward elric #alphonse elric

3 notes · View notes