Losing You - Bucky Barnes
a/n: i guess you could see this coming after all the gifs i reblogged recently, but i finally got around to catch up on the eps of TFATWS and now all i can think about is bucky... so here, take this cute little piece and enjoy some soft buck on this fine afternoon!
pairing: Bucky X Reader
warnings: TFATWS spoiler, blood, gunshot
word count: 1.2k
summary: You get injured when you try to save Bucky and he is mad at you for risking your life for him.
“You are so damn stubborn,” Bucky mumbles under his breath, slightly shaking his head as he focuses on the wound on your side. You hiss when he starts to stitch up your wound, the needle going through your skin over and over again as he closes the slit.
“I saved your life,” you grumble, reminding him that if you didn’t jump into action he would have gotten a bullet right through his chest. He might be a super soldier, but he is not immortal and he seems to forget about that a lot these days. He doesn’t answer, just shoots you a glare before his blue eyes return to the bloody wound on your side.
You had a pretty intense encounter with one of Karli’s people, he was big and bulky above already having the serum pumping through his veins. Bucky always tells you to leave the fighting to him, but the guy was about to end him when Bucky’s focus shifted for just a split second from his target. You were moving before you could even process what you were doing, pushing Bucky out of the way, earning yourself a battle wound as the bullet grazed your side, leaving a long slit on your skin.
A minute later Bucky won the battle and he would have captured the guy if only he wasn’t more concerned about you, groaning on the ground, holding your hand to your side. Now you have to listen to his scolding for at least a day about how you shouldn’t have gotten involved, even though you didn’t die and most importantly, he is still alive as well. In your book, that’s all that matters.
“There, all stitched up,” he sighs finishing his masterpiece. You roll your shirt back down as he packs up the bloody tissues and other equipment he used and as you sit up on the old sofa, your eyes fall on him. He avoids looking at you as he moves around in the room and you can tell he is holding a grudge for what you did, even when it’s clear you did it because you had to. He knows you would never let him die, not when you have the chance to save him, but now he is upset because you ignored his orders and put your own life at risk. But he always does the same, you can’t even count how many times he has been your savior, why can’t it be the other way around this one time?
“Are you really mad at me?” you softly ask, not in the mood to start another fight, you had that on the way home when he carried you in his arms while you were trying your best not to faint from the blood that was tainting your clothes more and more. You got into a kind of screaming match, both of you scared of the possibility of your wound being serious, but it was a relief when he checked it and saw that it wasn’t all that bad.
“I’m… not mad,” he mumbles under his breath, still not looking in your way.
“Then what are you?” you prompt the question, but you both know he has no answer. He is mad at you, but probably not for the right reasons.
“I’m upset, Y/N. You risked your life for me when you know you’re not a fighter! You’re here to help us with IT stuff, what were you thinking?!” he suddenly snaps, his bloodshot eyes finally find your frame and his eyes are filled with rage and… fear. “You could have died. If that bullet goes just a little bit more to the right, it would have gone through one of your vital organs and would have died right there, probably in my arms.”
“But I didn’t,” you tell him again, but it doesn’t matter. He is too hung up on the what ifs and he refuses to see the positive side of the situation.
“But you could have! And then I would have lost another person I love!”
You open your lips and then close, the raw emotions of his heavy words are clouding the room and you stare at each other as his chest heaves, hands curled into fists by his side, the veins popping on his neck.
It took him so much time to admit to his feelings about you. He was adamant whether he should allow himself this small piece of happiness in his tortured life and though at first he tried to fight it, he eventually realized he just can’t keep himself away from you. But now he is facing the consequences of letting himself care so deeply about someone for the first time in so long. He is not mad at you for not obeying, he is mad because you risked your life and he knows he wouldn’t be able to move on if anything ever happened to you because of him.
Pushing yourself up from the couch you hiss a little as you come to stand and he immediately reaches out to help you, but you just wave at him, doing it on your own. Stepping closer he stands still, staring down at you intently as he watches you reach up and cup his face in your palms.
“I’m sorry for risking my life, but I wasn’t thinking. You were being hurt and I had the chance to help. You would do the same for me, right? You would always take care of me and make sure I’m safe.”
“Of course,” he breathes out nodding shortly.
“I feel the same way. I might not be a super soldier or an excellent fighter, but I would do anything for the people I love. And that includes you as well.”
His eyes soften as he leans into your touch, closing his eyes for a moment, his hands finding your waist as he pulls you into his embrace careful not to hurt your wound.
“I just don’t want to lose you,” he whispers, his voice is so broken and full of fears. When his eyes open again they look at you with so much pain and fear in them, it hurts you to see him like this. He has suffered so much in his extraordinarily long life, he deserves just as much love as he gives to others.
“I’m still here. I’m tougher than you might think,” you joke, wanting to lighten the mood. He cracks a small smile as he leans closer and presses a kiss to your forehead.
“Of course you are,” he smirks and he is about to lean down to kiss you on your lips when the front door opens and Sam appears. Bucky texted him about your little encounter and he must have ran back immediately, his terror filled eyes are now scanning your body, checking if you have every part. Then he realizes that the two of you are kind of having a moment and he sighs in relief, but doesn’t miss the chance to have a snarky comment.
“You just faced death, Y/N, and you are already jumping his bones? You two needs to just fu—“
He doesn’t get to finish, Bucky cuts him off with a warning glare.
“Watch your mouth,” he growls, but you see the tiny smirk hiding in the corner of his mouth. Sam just laughs, walking past the two of you, giving you some privacy. “He surely knows how to ruin a moment,” Bucky mumbles rolling his eyes, but you just laugh, curling your arms around his neck.
“Where were we before he barged in?” you ask, tilting your head to the side with an innocent look.
“Mm, right here,” he hums before his lips finally find yours.
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