#the fic will be rated M or E depending on how i decide to go about the last scene because that part will get Seggsy

[0nelittlebirdtoldme]

Birdie's Prompts Etiquette - Masterlist

Since I have been getting a lot of prompts lately, both on here as well as on Ao3, for which I am so thankful, I decided to re-make my original post on my writing limits and type the whole thing out in closer detail. No type of judgement of course🖤

Where should I leave you prompts?

I am taking prompts only on Tumblr. All prompts which are left in the comment section under one of my works on Ao3 will be in the future ignored and/or deleted.

My ask box is always open, and you can send me a prompt at any time, both anoymous as well as openly!

What type of prompts can I leave?

Please always state the fandom/pairing the prompt is for. If this isn't given, I am taking the liberty to decide for myself who I want to write about.

Simple One-Word Prompts

Longer formulated requests

Anything in between

What type of content are you willing to write?

Definitely:

T-M rated content

M/M Pairings

Angst, Creepy Fluff, Fluff, Slice of Life, Romance, Hurt/Comfort etc.

Fandoms I am currently writing for on Ao3.

Maybe:

E rated content

M/F Pairings

Whump and general triggering/dark content

Smut

Topics requiring these Archive Warnings: graphic depictions of violence, major character death, rape/non-con

Fandoms I haven't written for before

No:

F/F Pairings

Gen-Category Fics

Underage

Crack Fics

Glorified or fetishized unhealthy/abusive (canon) relationships. Yes, some of the couples I write for a questionable, but I am always aware of the dark nature of their relationships. I probably won't write whole-hearted, sweet "UwU, they are so cute together"-content for these type of ships, unless I go full AU.

What can I expect from you?

Any form of a Drabble (simple, double, triple, collection etc.)

A shorter Ficlet

A Oneshot

What should I keep in mind?

I am not taking any Long-Fic requests currently

I take the liberty to decide for myself which prompts I want to write about, and I sadly cannot promise you, that your prompt will be filled

You are free to send me several prompts, but please do not hand in the same prompt multiple times - I can assure you, I got it the first time around

Please remember the human 🖤

In case you are not sure about something, you can always leave me a prompt, and whether or not I answer it depends on how comfortable I am with the topic/fandom etc. Or just message me privately! I won’t judge you either way!

Thank you so much for all your interest and prompts, they really do mean a lot!

-- Birdie 🖤🦇

#my fic #tumblr prompt #birdie's prompt etiquette masterpost

[n7punk]

It’s kind of a shame that your most popular fics are the more expkicit ones. I mean, I get it, but still! All your fics are great, you can just really see where ppls priorities are in the hit counts lol

this is super long sorry i had Many Thots.

honestly that could be a false correlation. at the top of my views are my long form AUs, and a lot of those are explicit (the non-explicit ones being ditm, the greys, 3m2, lotd, wdtfd, mnohl, tdhfy, & reflection - and only 3 of those are T, with the rest being M). long form fics get recommended more and they naturally have a higher view count because for one person to read to the end of one with 10 chapters, they have to view it 10 times. a lot of my T-M AUs are shorter (longest being 7 chapters) than my E AUs (the longest being 23 chapters....) so they get less views.

additionally, i think all of those T/M AUs except ditm, the greys, & maybe 3m2 were posted after ao3 changed how it counts views (only counting them from logged in users, not guests), so all fics posted after that date have a lower view count because a lot fewer are registering. i dont remember exactly when this happened, but thats a factor. a lot of the lower rated stuff is newer, so it has had less time to rack up views (not to mention the number of engaged fans in the catradora fandom naturally shrinking some as time passes from the end of the show).

for all these reasons, i would mostly look for correlation when it comes to one shots. There, you do see a lot of the explicit fics near the top, but i think you see something interesting if you sort by kudos instead. one shots are put on more even footing with long fics and you get an idea of how many individual people liked a story (now, you no longer get an idea of how many times they went back to reread it, which is a factor in enjoyment, and there's still the "sharing" bias for long fics, but i digress).

if you sort by kudos, you suddenly see a lot less bias for explicit ones (in fact, i would say its gone, given like a third of my fics are explicit). for instance, 3m2 becomes my 5th most popular fic.

this kind of leads to my final theory, which is that people are more likely to "reread" an explicit fic. because, well, they already know the plot, so they are less likely to randomly decide to reread that, but they are drawn back to the smut when they want to... be horny. anyway, ive suspected this is a phenomenon for a long time and looking at the view counts now, i definitely feel it has weight.

this makes the explicit fics seem more popular, and i guess you could argue they are, but if somebody is coming back just to read the smut, i dont know that really counts as them "rereading". its possible they'll then be like "oh yeah, i like this" and reread the whole thing, but it all depends what you put weight in personally.

so yeah. fic popularity is hard to rate. i kinda went off there but tldr, i don't think it's so much a correlation in popularity as it is in hit count.

now (i know, more after the tldr, i have a lot of Thots), i will say i think there is a bias in writers (me, at least) to make long form things explicit. i know for a fact there are people who look at an 80k fic that's rated T and go "why am i gonna get that invested and they dont even fuck at the end", so they skip that fic. this can be solved by including just one smut scene and not a bunch of them, but i also know for me personally, i would rather have multiple or none, because it feels like a waste to rate it E for one scene knowing that's also boxing out the people who dont like to read smut.

I'm also not so interested in writing "smut for smut's sake" so i usually only include it as part of a larger narrative where the plot just happens to include fucking (or it allows me to explore the characters in a new way). In general, i've really been feeling M fics lately because I feel like I can write whatever I want and still get most of the plot impact of smut, but I don't "have to" actually write it, which I just haven't been interested in.

I dont know if people who dont want smut also filter out M fics (i know before i started posting myself i didnt know the difference between M and E), but as i've said many times, i'm writing for myself, so how much i care runs out there if they do lmao. the fic that's upcoming is T, to be clear, this is just where i am generally.

#ask #anon #also im mostly making asks not rebloggable #because people would always reblog the weirdest random asks and it just made me go ?? #asks are usually a lot more of me just talking and not usually intended to be shared outside of my audience/readers #so that was always kind of weird to me because i was like who cares about this except the people who follow me? #ficmeta #fic rambling #all fics

[mightbewriting]

Hi mbw! Love you works sooo much.I was wondering how do you determine how smutty the piece you’re writing is? In W&H the sex scenes are written more akin to poetry but then reading some of your one shots etc, you also can write some that don’t shy away from being more tangible and detailed. Also, when writing fanfics vs original works, is there anything you find yourself changing in re: to smutty scenes?

hi anon! please pardon the meandering answer, i went on a bit of an adventure thinking about this.

the short answer to this is: i do what i want. which sounds glib, but there is quite literally a 'what do i feel like doing' kind of vibe that goes into that decision making.

however, the long answer (and the rest of the decision making) is that it very much depends on the story. and i would actually argue that my one shots have the most range in explicitness (vs my novel/novella length stories that are almost exclusively M/E).

for example:

there's some G rated nuggets with no sexual content (which certainly does not mean there's no romantic tension) like in rendezvous receipts (nottpott) and a taste of peppermint (nevmione).

there's T rated fics with more obvious romantic/sexual tension, kissing, and some implications of off screen sex like in overwhelming evidence (scorbus) and scone strategies (dramione).

there's M rated one shots (which is probably my favorite way to write smut) with less explicit language in the on-page smut, partial scenes/fade-to-black, and an emphasis on the emotional experience in fics like hippogriff homewrecking (dramione) and lie with me (dramione).

and then there's the E rated ones with explicit sexual language, an emphasis on the physical experience, and the smut as a pretty central component of the story like in well said, hermione (dramione) and sixty minutes (remione).

how i decide which of those one shots will be explicit and which ones won't be is heavily influenced by the plot, the pov, and those unquantifiable ~vibes~ i'm feeling. part of the reason most of my novellas end up rated E (see: intimate transations [sirmione], love in other places [dramione], and season pass (to this ass) [dramione]) is because their plots usually involve sex as a key part of story. like when trading physical intimacies for emotional ones or dating a himbo quidditch player specifically to have good sex for the first time. (which, i find it easier to write smut-centric things in slightly shorter form bc i think its difficult to maintain effective, non-exhaustive tension the longer it goes).

so with well said, hermione for example, both the plot and the pov lend themselves to a more explicit writing style. we have a hermione who discovers she has a very specific voice kink and likes hearing draco recite shakespeare, and we have a first person draco pov who is very, very into that. compare that to something like overwhelming evidence where we still have a first person male pov, but scorpius is a nervous, rambling little mess and the plot is very much about them getting together, rather than them being together.

with the example of w&h, pov played a huge, huge part in it. that hermione pov was looking at and thinking about sex in a fairly anticipatory, romanticized way, so it didn't make sense to me for her internal monologue and the way she experienced sex to include explicit language and to focus so heavily on the physical mechanics of what was happening. compare that to b&e, where draco's pov is much more (forgive the wild generalizations) horny young dude (tm) definitely thinking in explicit terms. compare that again to s&s where we again have a male pov but theo has ~so much shit~ going on (and is definitely a Romantic, capital R) and therefore the smut in that story leans much more M rated. all the smut i write is heavily filtered through a character's pov, so how it's written/experienced needs to make sense to me for who they are.

so i think this all kind of boils down to a combination of what i feel like doing and what makes sense for the story i'm writing.

an aside worth addressing here is that there's definitely a lot of pressure when writing in fandom to write explicit smut and to write a lot of it. there's a very high demand for porn in fic and therefore a high incentive to supply to that demand because the higher the rating, the more hits, very broadly speaking. and this can be super demotivating for a lot of folks who either don't want to write explicit smut, don't feel comfortable (for whatever reason) writing explicit smut, or who are writing non-explicit things and seeing much less engagement as a result.

and i think this is why i weight doing what i want so heavily. if i feel like writing explicit smut that's great, awesome, i'll do it because i want to. if i don't feel like writing it, i just won't. and that works for me because i weight my enjoyment of my writing process and my final result more heavily than the engagement i ultimately get out of it. which isn't the same for everyone; some people might prefer to have more engagement and so they're going to intentionally include smut, and that's totally cool.

as for original works, explicitness comes down to the audience i'm writing for and what i think a market/publisher might want. like with fic, there's a whole range of explicitness and it really just depends on what genre i'm wanting to write in.

i hope this was....moderately helpful at least? we meandered a bit but i think it was fairly coherent in the end lol. thanks for the ask, friend! i had fun thinking about it at the very least!

#anonymous asks

[daredevil-podfic-community]

Podfic Listener Preferences: Choosing a Fic

Do you ever feel like you’re making wild guesses at what podfic listeners want?

Well, it’s fair to say that you can’t please everyone all the time, but our next few posts will present data from our Podfic Audience Survey (please take the survey and share it with your followers/friends!) that may give you more confidence when making decisions about how to produce your podfics.

This data is as of April 24, 2022 with 123 responses.

1. What length of fic are you looking to record?

1,000 words can correlate to anywhere from 3.5 to 8 minutes, depending on reading speed, and recording and editing time is usually at least 3 times the length of the finished product. Recording a longer fic is a big commitment.

However, if you’re looking for readership, longer may be better. Only 9.8% of respondents said they “usually look for” podfics of less than 30 minutes. This makes sense, since nearly 70% of respondents say they are always doing something else while listening, so they may not want to stop to click to the next story.

While 22.8% of respondents look for “Epic” (>3 hour) podfics, don’t feel like you have to commit to 9+ hours of recording and editing time just to get listeners. 28.5% look for podfics between 90 minutes and 3 hours, and the largest proportion of respondents, 39%, think the sweet spot is 30-90 minutes.

2. Should you record that explicit fic?

Obviously, the answer to this question first depends on your comfort level. Some people just don’t want to go there, and that’s fine!

When asked to select all fanfiction ratings (based on AO3 ratings) that they “listen to most often,” our respondents showed that you will find listeners for podfics at any rating! In fact, in the most popular response pattern, 38.2% of responses selected all four ratings.

G-rated fics had a significantly lower percentage of responses (58.5%) compared to Teen, Mature, and Explicit, which ranged from 73.2-78%.

15.4% or responses were looking for some spice, preferring E or M fics. Interestingly, an equal number of people said they would listen to anything but G as those who chose anything but E.

3. What relationship categories do people prefer?

If you’re familiar with AO3 demographics, these responses probably won’t shock you. There’s a massive preference for m/m slash ships, with 92.7% of responses selecting this option. Of those who listen to M/M, 36% prefer M/M exclusively and 21.1% prefer M/M or Gen only.

Gen was the next most popular category, though after a large margin with just 48.8% of respondents choosing it. Of those who chose Gen, only 5% prefer it exclusively.

Multi / Poly came behind Gen with 31.7% of responses, but none selected that category exclusively. 22% chose F/F femslash, 11% of those preferring it exclusively. M/F ships are the least popular category, with just 13.8% of respondents choosing that option and none choosing it exclusively.

4. What genres do listeners like?

The results of this question, I think, are a snapshot of the wonderful contradictions of fandom. Take a look:

Romance (83.7%) is the clear leader, but behind that you have ties between Fluff and Hurt/Comfort (69.9%), then Angst and Humor (65.9%). Next up was Fix-It Fic (55.3%).

Action/Adventure should actually be at 34.2% because it was added after a consistent number of write-ins brought to our attention that it should be a listed option. As such, its numbers might have been slightly higher with prompting early in the survey.

Mystery (29.3%) and Horror (16.3%) brought up the rear of the prompted genres. Among non-adventure write-ins, case fic was the most common.

5. What fandoms have good listenership?

Fandom is the hardest data to wrangle from our survey, and chances are you already know what fandoms you want to read for. But for those trying to decide if you want to start reading in a certain fandom, here’s what we’ve got:

When prompted with a list of the 14 fandoms with the most English podfics, 26.8% of responses indicated they listened to Marvel podfic, 26.8% to Supernatural, 22% Harry Potter, 18.7% Men’s Hockey RPF, 17.9% Good Omens, 15.4% Merlin, 13.8% Teen Wolf, 12.2% The Untamed, 11.4% Star Wars, and 10.6% Sherlock.

The survey has primarily been distributed through tumblr and Discord, so it’s likely that it hit “pockets” of certain fandoms, leading to over-represented results. However, the results for fandoms above 10% are generally in line with the number of English podfics in each fandom, with some skewing likely related to fandom age (Sherlock has fewer reported listeners but more podfics, vise versa for The Untamed).

But if you’re thinking about a small fandom, fear not! There were forty-one write-in fandoms on our question “What fandoms do you listen to podfic for most often?” and when asked what fandoms they wished there were more podfic for, respondents provided seventy-four fandoms - and that was combining related fandoms, like lumping all of Marvel and all of DC together! The vast majority of these fandoms had just one write-in response, so while audiences for fringe fandoms may not be large, chances are good there’s at least one person out there, waiting to hear from you.

The top write-in responses for both questions, if you’re curious, were Schitt’s Creek, The Witcher, and DC.

#fandom survey #podficcing #podfics #fandom data

[safyresky]

Real talk, is ao3 better? Should I remove my story from ffnet and post it on ao3 instead to get better traction?

Honestly, it's really hard to say! I certainly don't have a definitive answer for you. Personally I think the whole ao3/ff dot net situation is very much up to each user's personal preferences, so I'll share my thoughts and maybe that'll help you make a decision that you're happy with?

I will say, that though I am crossposting, I am NOT going to be taking down my stories from ff dot net. Unless I make them original work and then have to bc LEGALITIES or whatever, lol.

See, the thing is people do still use ff dot net! And a lot of stories exist there that don't exist on ao3! And a lot of people don't use ao3! That's why I keep mine up there and have been updating on both platforms as best as I can :)

In terms of which is BETTER, that all depends on user experience, lol. For posting, I'm finding that I really like ao3! I'm a HUGE FAN of how the update interface works--the separation of Notes from the actual text, the tagging system, and how easy it is to pop in and edit post-posting a new fic/chapter/whatever :)

For reading, while ao3 is easier on the eyes and has 0 ads, I have a very hard time dealing with the huge amount of filters. ESPECIALLY since the sections for media also include the crossovers. I like the ff dot net separates the crossovers from the regular non-crossover fic automatically!

Of course, this is a LITTLE pet peeve of mine lol and the first thing I do in any category when searching for fic is filter OUT crossovers, and then the more intense M rated tag-esque stuff that I personally am not a fan of (though some people do like that and that's a-okay! What's gr8 about ao3 is that there's no like, ban on what you can write. It's not censored, that's the word I'm looking for! Another pro to ao3 if you wanna write some nitty-gritty angst or dark fic or what have you). Quite frankly, the amount of tags and filters going on is gr8 for stories and curating your reading experience! Lots of text just hurts my eyes, but I've been adjusting!

In terms of traction, ao3 may have a better platform for a wider audience. For starters, their stats aren't broken right now, so that's a pro! ff dot nets legacy stats are broken, so hits haven't been showing up, though comments and updates are coming through--just not the e-mails if you've opted out. Which they automatically do now bc of a gnarly spam problem the last few years. And the comment system is a lot more robust than ff dot net's PM replies and the like.

Overall, ao3 is easier to use and offers more in terms of categorizing your fics! I'd recommend posting to ao3 100% :). I know that my older fics won't get as many numbers as they did on ff dot net and that's okay! i keep them up on there for those that prefer it still over ao3, and for me to go back and see the reviews and the like.

If you do decide to take everything down from ff dot net, save save save! Backup the stories you have, download them, and take snapshots of any reviews you like, bc once they're gone, they're gone, and idk about you, but I LOVE going back and reading the reviews I have over on ff dot net!

tl;dr: both sites have their merits; ao3 has way more staff, and more opportunities for engagement, as well as easier layouts for posting and commenting. FF dot net isn't going anywhere, but has a much smaller staff and has changed some things about notifications, so definitely double check your e-mail settings. If you take stuff down from ff dot net, save your work first! And any reviews you're fond of, too!

But overall, deffs try ao3 before jumping ship. It may not work for everyone; I avoided it for YEARS bc it was hard for me to get used to and it has been a VERY slow crawl for myself in learning how it works, but BOY is it hella customizable and easy to use and I like it!!!

#dani answers #anonymous #i am very against mob mentality/doing what everyone else does tbh #for lakc of a better phrase/term #i am very much you curate your own experience; nobody can decide which is better for you but you #so poke around a bit; maybe crosspost one or two over and see how the feel/vibe is #and how engagement feels for you and such #and then decide from there #BUT NO MATTER WHAT. IF YOU DELETE WORKS OFF FF.NET. SAVE THE STUFF YOU LIKE! INCLUDING REVIEWS!!!! #I'D BE DEVASTATED IF I LOST SOME OF THE REVIEWS I'VE GARNERED OVER 10 YEARS OF STORIES SITTING IN SMOLL FANDOMS #DEVASTATED! #hopefully this helps a bit anon. sorry if it's rambly1 I'm running off to lunch lol #ask box shenanigans #anyone else wanna chime in??

[bethanynanowrimo]

Yellow Wood

Summary:

Reggie Peters doesn't know where he's going in life or what he wants from it. He unfortunately has to confront it when assigned to write an essay for English class about where he wants to be in ten years. Reggie is stuck at a crossroads in life, and has no idea which way to go. Which road will he go down, and what lies down the other path?

Rating:

As of right now, I am planning on sticking to a T or M rating, depending on how graphic I want to go with some of the subject matter. HOWEVER, I may decide to add smut at some point, which would obviously crank the rating up to E, but as of now, I just don't know.

WARNINGS:

Right now I know the story will deal with the following subject matter: child abuse, drug use, homophobia, miscarriage, and polyamory

Pairings:

I will tell you that this fic is gonna be pretty all over the place, so there's gonna be a few pairings, but if you know me, and what I write, just know that I am going to touch on my big 3, and there may be background Willex and Flarrie, but they will be very minor to the story.

[ao3commentoftheday]

Hello! I'm still struggling with the ratings on AO3. I know there are some explanations, but is there a way for you to further explain them? I'm sorry, I just don't seem to understand how to use the ratings properly for my stories. I just never know whether they should be general or for teens and all! Thank you so much!

Ratings on AO3 are at the author's discretion, although you should try your best to rate your fic accurately. Look for the little bubble with the ? in it for the definitions and examples that AO3 provides to help authors decide.

As a general rule, G and T are one side of the rating spectrum and M and E are on the other side. Stories rated G and T will be generally "family friendly" in the way a lot of TV shows are. Stories rated M and E are more suited for "mature audiences."

Where the line gets drawn between G and T is going to depend on your own point of view and the way your fandom generally rates things.

For me, if it's a G rated fic then there's no swearing, no violence, and physical intimacy would be holding hands, hugging, and brief kisses. I'd tag T for swears, mild violence (a fist fight, but not a gun fight for example), and physical intimacy where no one removes their clothes and any clothes-on shenanigans aren't described in a lot of detail.

The way you interpret those ratings and where your fandom(s) draw the line might be different from where I do, though, and that's okay. But to give you some more data to work from, let's see how everyone else differentiates G and T.

#asks and answers

[admiral-alby]

bob fic recs galore

here’s the fruits of my labour. a working fic rec master-post containing multiple bob ships and many, many amazing fics. the writers in this fandom are absolutely incredible and their talent astounds me every time I read a new fic. all the kudos to y’all. keep on keeping on!

this is a long post. recs and some general notes are under the cut :)

(04/13/21) I’ll do my best to keep this list updated... or I’ll make a part 2 depending on length. if anyone has any recs that are not already listed in this post, please please message me! this is no way an exhaustive list and I’m sure I missed some fantastic fics out there - to get started I mostly just plucked from my bookmarks. I’d be happy to add on new fics for ANY pairing, rare-pairs included. I don’t really have much for rare-pairs in this rec because I haven’t read much yet but that will change soon when I have some more time on my hands to get into them  :)

if you are an author on this list and you would like your work removed from it, please just message me. no explanation necessary I will take it off asap.

I’ll make the disclaimer that while I tried to include some general information about each fic, I did not include tags/warnings. so if you choose a fic, read the tags and proceed at your own discretion.

 @capsparkyspeirs   you’re a lovely human being and this is probably not what you were imagining when I said I’d be happy to rec some fics for you. I admit it got a little out of hand but there’s so many great fics out there I couldn’t stand to choose just a couple to send your way... so you get them all! you inspired me to do this, so this is for you and anyone else who wants to read some great fics but doesn’t know where to start <3

WINNIX (RICHARD WINTERS/LEWIS NIXON)

Long Ago and Far Away (Canon Winnix) by churchkey (Series) Rated T-E / Canon Era / 18013 Words (Total) / 4 Parts / Not Complete

Summary: “A few scenes exploring how Dick and Lew became the timeless cosmic lovers they were born to be.“

*Each part can be read as a stand-alone!

It Happened One Night by raquelelpillo Rated M / Groundhog Day AU / 7704 Words / Complete

Summary: “ Nixon gets the chance to do the day before the big jump over and over and over (or, Every Fandom Needs Groundhog's Day Fic).”

Finding Our Way in the Dark by rilla Rated E / Canon Era / Soulmate AU / 8477 Words / Complete

Summary: “After Dick and Lew share their first kiss in Austria, they open their eyes to find a golden thread binding their wrists together.“

Mutual by miss_grey Rated G / Canon Era / 2105 Words / Complete

Summary: “Dick couldn’t help wondering to himself when exactly Nix had decided that Dick’s personal space had become their mutual space.“

Let Me Be Close by armyofbees  Rated G / Canon Era (Post-War) / 8679 Words / Complete

Summary: “Five things Nix loves about Dick, and one thing Dick loves about Nix.Or,The thing about Nix, Dick is beginning to learn, is that he doesn’t love in halves. Nix loves with everything in him, and sometimes that means moving to the middle of nowhere in Pennsylvania for Dick. Sometimes it means making spaghetti with him because Dick came to New Jersey and planted tomatoes, of all things. Sometimes it means telling without saying.”

Let’s Start the New Year Right by slightlytookish Rated G / Canon Era (Post-War) / 10523 Words / Complete

Summary: “Nix had always been able to pick Dick out of a crowd, even when he was lying on his belly in the dirt two hundred yards away, squinting through binoculars at an entire company of men wearing identical uniforms. It was easier to spot him in the crush of people inside Penn Station, even out of the familiar uniform: the same tall figure, the same bright hair, the same way he always seemed to find Nix just as easily and turn towards him, like an arrow on a compass.”

Lancaster County by raquelelpillo Rated T / AU / 31500 Words / 17 Chapters / Complete

Summary: “Nix is born later. Dick is there. (AU). Set in the summer of 1942 in Lancaster, Pennsylvania.”

**It is part of a series with the other works being small ‘extras’ set through the story. This is the main work. It ends a bit ambiguously.

SPEIRTON (RONALD SPEIRS/CARWOOD LIPTON)

The Desolate House by Howling_Harpy Rated E / Canon Era (Post-War) / 26672 Words / Complete

Summary: “It's been fifteen years since Carwood has last seen or spoken to Speirs when they reunite suddenly at an Easy Company reunion and have both recently relocated back to the US. Carwood has promised to his mother to finish packing and cleaning the family's boarding house that's about to be put up for sale, and on a whim invites Speirs to help him. He didn't expect him to actually show up.”

and you on my mind by seabright Rated E / Canon Era (Post-War) / 11081 Words / Complete

Summary: “’You say that you don’t want any of Easy to know that you’re in Boston but you give me your address.’  Following a relationship through the end of the war and beyond.”

Of Soldiers and Secrets by nanuk_dain Rated E / Canon Era / 62988 Words / 26 Chapters / Complete

Summary: “A series of moments in the life of the Easy men, from Foy until after the war, focussing on the development of the relationship of Carwood Lipton and Ronald Speirs.”

Erasure by Howling_Harpy Rated M / Canon Era (Post-War) / 15255 Words / Complete

Summary: “Carwood takes time off from work to visit his mother to get away from his lonely life in Boston. Ron is deployed to Korea and has been for a long while, and after spending a year alone and even longer lying to everyone, Carwood is not sure he wants to live like this anymore.”

Fluences by masongirl (Series) Rated T-M / Canon Era / Soulmates AU / 12818 Words (Total) / 5 Works / Complete

Summary: “ Soulmate AU in which soulmates can sense each other's emotions if they are close enough.”

**Mainly Speirton centric. Part 2 is Winnix & Part 3 is Shifty/Tab.

A Thousand Kisses by Arwen88 Rated T / Canon Era / 1993 Words / Complete

Summary: “ A late night in Hardigny brings Carwood to the room where Ron is dealing with paperwork, but even with a comfortable bed, he can’t find his peace. Late night chats have Ron showing a side of himself that Carwood had not expected.”

stop the world by languageofthebirds Rated T / Canon Era / 3001 Words / Complete

Summary: “The way his hair fell in mussed waves over his forehead made Carwood want to reach out and run his fingers through it. He was sin personified, in that moment.”

**Did I throw in a shameless self promo? Sure did.

WEBGOTT (JOSEPH LIEBGOTT/DAVID WEBSTER)

rivers always reach the sea by bitchbutter (Series) Rated E / Canon Era / 40790 Words (Total) / 2 Works / Not Complete / Last Updated March 17, 2021

Part 1 Summary: “Joe breaks things off with Web in Austria. Of course, nothing with them is ever that simple.“

Part 2 Summary: “The end of the war could be the end of a lot of things. If Joe could let it be.“

if i know you at all, i know you’ve gone too far by starblessed Rated T / Canon Era / 2654 Words / Complete

Summary: “How many stars d’you think there are, Web?” Joe asks after a moment.David has no damned clue. “A lot,” he answers confidently. “Millions.”“Millions,” echoes Joe. The glittering stars are reflected in his eyes, like black pits sending each beam of light back outward. It’s almost hypnotizing, the way they flicker. If he stares too long, David knows he will get lost in them...  and that doesn't seem like the worst way to go.”

Teller of Tales; Song of Songs by thedastardly Rated E / Canon Era (Post War) / 8352 Words / Complete

Summary: “He hopes that he dreams about the mountaintop tonight. He isn’t in the mood to dream of the water, the shore, the everything after, again.”

the only noise beating out is ours by lakehymn Rated M / Canon Era (Post-War) / 3470 Words / Complete

Summary: “Over the next couple weeks, Webster realizes that Liebgott has effortlessly invaded every corner of his life. Even on the days when he barely sees Liebgott at all, he can always find comic books or packs of cigarettes lying around somewhere. It’s almost disconcerting how ordinary it’s beginning to feel to stumble upon someone else’s belongings in his own house.”

push and pull by LT_Aldo_Raine

Rated T / Modern AU / 4115 Words / Complete

Summary: ““got hands like an ocean, push you out, pull you back in” And David Webster never could resist the ocean. OR: Webster snorted, a sardonic sound that echoed across the hotel room. “You don’t know the first thing about what I need.””

hang in there, baby by rilla Rated M / Modern AU / 3116 Words / Complete

Summary: “Written for the Kisstober prompt 'upside down Spiderman kisses'. '“I don’t know what I was expecting when I asked you what your top fantasy is,” Web says, “but it wasn’t this."'”

In His Wildest Dreams by Impala_Chick Rated E / Canon Era / Dream Sharing AU / 3891 Words / Complete

Summary: “While David is in the hospital, he starts sharing dreams with Liebgott.“

Black Ink on Some Blue Lines by thelastfig Rated E / Canon Era & Post War / 10185 Words / Complete

Summary: “It’s been sixteen years since the letter was written, but it never found its way to the one it was intended for. The thing about secrets is they eat away at you, not all at once but slowly over the years, and you begin to wonder, to play out the what if scenarios in your mind. Instead, David buried it away and pretended like it never existed. He should have killed it, he thinks to himself, not buried it while it still had breath in its lungs. In which David remembers his evolving relationship with Joe over the course of the war and decides to deliver a letter.”

LUZTOYE (GEORGE LUZ/JOSEPH TOYE)

The best laid plans by masongirl (Series) Rated G-E / Modern AU / 52652 Words (Total) / 15 Parts / Complete

Summary: “Modern AU in which Joe and George find each other as college students and build a life together.“

each and every day (of the year) by bruce_the_shark Rated M / Modern AU / 21630 Words / 2 Chapters / Complete

Summary: “Joe grins, lifts his hand from George’s hip to grip him by the chin, twists his face around to catch his lips in a bruising kiss. George relishes in it, likes how the taste of Joe’s preferred brand of liquor mixes with the taste of his own on his tongue. He grins against Joe’s lips, knows it’s going to be a good year.”

Babysitting and Other Rationales by aces_low Rated T / Modern AU / 3267 Words / Complete

Summary: “George Luz is a god damn saint, or at least some kind of kid whisperer. And Joe's just trying to keep his head on straight.”

who let the dogs in? by starblessed Rated T / Modern AU / 1869 Words / Complete

Summary: ““And he heard me shouting and I guess it inspired him or something, cause he full-on charged at me, Joe, and before I could even slam the door, he was just —“ George cuts off with an incoherent noise, gesturing grandly to their front door. “In! And then he was running, and sniffing everything, and exploring our shit, and he peed —““Not on my damn couch,” Joe growls.“No, on the nice carpet. Marking his territory, y’know? Except it’s our territory, but I guess it’s his now, because he won’t freakin’ leave.”

BABEROE (EDWARD HEFFRON/EUGENE ROE)

Call me sweetheart, please? by mariamegale (Series) Rated G-E / Modern AU / 95865 Words (Total) / 12 Works / Complete

Summary: “A not-relationship in the making.”

**Each part could be read as a standalone I suppose... But it’s so worth it to read the whole series!

between the walls by CountlessStars Rated M / Canon Era (Post-War) / 2275 Words / Complete

Summary: “ Eugene decides to paint his living room. It should be easy, it really should, but it doesn't go as planned (in more ways than one).”

Walking Wounded by papersky_pencilstars Rated G / Canon Era / Magic AU / 3501 Words / Complete

Summary: “Prompt: Canon-era; Either Gene or Babe have magic, or both. Maybe magic is known or maybe they need to hide it.”

JOHNNY MARTIN/BULL RANDLEMAN

they don’t know about the up all nights (they don’t know I’ve waited all my life) by PotofCoffee Rated T / Canon Era / 22010 Words / 3 Chapters / Complete

Summary: “ Johnny and Bull throughout the war, in a slow meandering dance you might just call love.”

All My Love to Give by Muccamukk Rated E / Canon Era / 8852 Words / Complete

Summary: “ Johnny wants to screw around to pass the time. Bull wants to show Johnny how he feels without having to risk saying it”

The Red String by Arwen88 Rated M / Canon Era / Soulmates AU / 1834 Words / Complete

Summary: “He had to wrench his gaze away from the sickening sight, from the machine that was probably moments away from killing his soulmate. He would’ve thrown himself under that tank if that meant saving his lover, but he couldn’t do it. He had to take care of his men, and so he forced himself to stop looking, to order his men to retreat, to see that they did what he was screaming at them.“

Over Where You Began Muccamukk Rated E / Canon Era / 2949 Words / Complete

Summary: “ The way Bull saw it, Johnny was mad at him now, and Bull had no idea what he'd done wrong. Maybe it was better to just let it lie, let Johnny come out of whatever angry mood he was in on his own, instead of kicking an ant's nest.”

Simple as a Glass of Chocolate by ThrillingDetectiveTales Rated E / Canon Era / 2600 Words / Complete

Summary: ““It was supposed to be syrup,” Johnny muttered darkly. “Says right there on the can!”“Reckon it started out that way,” Bull shrugged, biting his lip against a smile when Johnny narrowed a glare over his shoulder.(In which Johnny and Bull try to sweeten up their sex life and it doesn't go exactly as planned.)”

CHUCK GRANT/RONALD SPEIRS

to Babel, in ruins by captainkilly Rated T / Canon Era (Post-War) / 5114 Words / Complete

Summary: “Chuck knows recovery isn't a linear event. Knows there are times when words will leave him and the night will place him back beneath the dirt. Knows there are things he just can't speak about.Captain Speirs hears him anyway.”

pulse by captainkilly Rated T / Canon Era  / 4706 Words / Complete

Summary: “ Ron Speirs knows how to kill. Knows how to hurt, how to twist, how to maim. He doesn't think he's figured out how to love, not really, not where it counts the most, but the touches he reserves for Chuck Grant beg to differ.. “

AUTHORS

there are so many authors on this list that have written tons of amazing works for one or multiple pairings. as much as I would have loved to, I couldn’t rec all of their works... I had a hard enough time keeping it down to 3 or less works from the same author! similar to fics, I’ve only linked authors that I am familiar with/know have written multiple fics, so feel free to send me more people to add to the list :)

churchkey - is a sweetheart. has multiple amazing winnix works. she has recently gotten into super rarepair toye/malarkey. godspeed I’ll see you there when I read those fics.

ThrillingDetectiveTales - writes for multiple pairings. all of their works are fantastic! every time I see their name as the author I go !! and know it’s going to be good.

Howling_Harpy - has written so many fics. many different pairings. lots of speirton. they’ve ripped my heart out and made me cry but then gently kissed my forehead and put my heart back. I think that’s praise of the highest order.

masongirl - another fantastic author who has written so many amazing fics. tons of speirton and other ships too. also has made me cry and then quietly wiped my tears away.

mariamegale - baberoe queen. that’s all I have to say. I was tempted to just rec all her baberoe fics. check them out!

Muccamukk - another multi ship, multi works writer. i had a hard time only choosing a few of their fics to rec. they’ve got so much to offer!

Impala_Chick - writes lots of great webgott and other pairings too!

captainkilly - if i could rec all her fics I would. there’s some rarepair pieces that are fantastic. I didn’t list it here because it’s more of a character centric piece with an OFC and a little bit of ron/chuck dashed in mostly at the end, but read her form & void series. seriously. read it. I have nothing else to say because her work speaks for itself.

Arwen88 - another writer for multiple pairings with multiple works! love to see it. some great rarepair stuff and also fantastic popular pairings.

LT_Aldo_Raine - love their work! they write for multiple pairings.

#band of brothers #bob #fic rec #winnix #speirton #webgott #baberoe #luztoye #richard winters x lewis nixon #carwood lipton x ronald speirs #joseph liebgott x david webster #eugene roe x babe heffron #george luz x joe toye #charles grant x ronald speirs #bob fic rec #i did it #i only cried twice in the making of this post #or rather remaking x2 #thanks to tungle.com #but i persevered #j posts #long post #i'm so happy #when I work on this instead of my assignments #shhhh #I sure hope all the links work properly #😅😅

[potteresque-ire]

Concerning the incredibly far and deep reach of CCP’s propaganda, the narratives the government can spin and call the truth; does ‘the common normal populace’ actually know what’s really going on?

Hello everyone!!! Happy Chinese New Year!!

I’m grouping these asks because if I hear them correctly, they’re all related to this question: how much do people in China know about the atrocities committed by their government, and why don’t they do something about it?

It’s a difficult question, isn’t it? A potentially upsetting one too, just to think about. My answers are more opinion-based, more personal this time. Since there’re no polls about what people know, they have to be based a little more on my own impression, which has more chances of error. Please bear with me and proceed with caution ...

As with people in most countries, what people know is hugely dependent on individuals. Specifically, re: politics, I can think of at least three reasons why people don’t have the facts

1) they have limited access to information 2) they’re being lied to about what they know 3) they’re not interested in current affairs.

1), of course, is what most people think about when it comes to China. You’re right, Anon(s), that VPN use is indeed rampant in the country and is essentially an open secret; there’re no official numbers but surveys have estimated the number of users can be up to 100 million, most of them being youngsters. They use it to do exactly what most of us would imagine: gain access to things they don’t have otherwise. Instagram has been (sporadically?) blocked since 2014 September and so while users may have set up their accounts while being overseas, it’s indeed, (very) possible, that they’ve set up and maintained their account under VPN use.

Wait, you may ask, so you mean the Great Firewall of China doesn’t exist?

That’s exactly the official stance. Not because of private VPN use, but because individuals/companies can apply for a license via their telecommunications company to visit all internet sites. Hence, the government’s claim that the Great Firewall doesn’t exist—you’ll be let through as long as you ask (and we’ll watch your every step)! There are also no explicit laws prohibiting the use of private VPNs; only a handful of arrests associated with private VPN use have been made and only since 2019, and the punishment is considered light—no imprisonment, just fines. It is, in contrast, against the law to *provide* private VPN services, and while companies have been shut down, the crackdown has still been incredibly sluggish by Chinese government’s standards, especially when the Xi regime has made its intention of banning VPN known and directives have been issued for that in 2017.

Why has VPN continued to enjoy this “grey existence”? Because without VPN, a lot of foreign businesses would leave—some, for example, require the most efficient online tools developed outside China to track the foreign markets, and talents have rejected job offers in the country when they realised they couldn’t get on their favourite social media. The science and tech sectors also rely heavily on VPN—programmers relying on Google to search stackoverflow, for example, to find known solutions to bugs. 

VPNs have also served political purposes—Hong Kong, Taiwan, and Chinese Communist Party (CCP)-critical communities all over the world are all painfully aware of the Chinese government’s practice of hiring its own collection of internet commentators (”50 Cent Party”), and at times, mobilising their youths (gamers, fan circles) to scale the Firewall and astroturf, throw insults at the “CCP enemies” and bomb message boards with pro-CCP messages.

Also, a significant fraction of VPN companies, both in China and overseas, have been reported to have Chinese ownership, by companies with government connections. These VPN services provide a false sense of security for those who do not enjoy having big brother peeking behind their backs while acting as surveillance tools that extend beyond the country.

(Please be careful about free VPNs).

The next question: If until now, users of private VPNs only rarely get into trouble, what’s holding them from scaling the Great Firewall and learning the facts?

It is this: the law isn’t about “climbing the wall”, but what one does outside the wall.

Article 6 of the 2016 edition of Cybersecurity law states the following: 

第六条　国家倡导诚实守信、健康文明的网络行为，推动传播社会主义核心价值观，采取措施提高全社会的网络安全意识和水平，形成全社会共同参与促进网络安全的良好环境

Article 6: The State advocates sincere, honest, healthy and civilized network conduct; promoting dissemination of the core socialist values, adopting measures to raise the entire society's awareness and level of network security, and forming a good environment for the entire society to jointly participate in advancing network security.

What this article implies is this ~ legally, Chinese citizens are bound to the Chinese government’s rules of good internet conduct, regardless of whether they use VPN to get on the internet. As with many Chinese laws, however, the vagueness in wording invites more questions than answers. Is it getting on Twitter, a banned website, “sincere, honest, healthy and civilized network conduct”? Obviously, it’s illegal to interact with other users about the Xinjiang’s internment camps, but what if one only goes there to talk about their favourite stars, because on Weibo supertopic they can’t even mention the stars’ name, can’t ahkgkhagjkfaskjgdf about their favourite fics? What if one goes there to discuss a M- or E-rated fic? Where is the line drawn and given its vagueness, will that line move tomorrow? How?

Most people, therefore, have opted to simply stay away from VPN. After all, China offers its own version of many of the fun websites out there (Weibo-Twitter; Instagram-Oasis; Tiktok-Douyin; Youtube-Bilibili). For those who do use VPN, they tend to stick to websites that are unlikely to cause issues (such as Instagram; Instagram became an issue when Hong Kongers started to upload information about the protests on there).

Now, let’s proceed to 2): People don’t know the facts because they’re being lied to about what they know.

There’s a difference between having access to facts and knowing that they’re facts. This is among the most painful lessons, perhaps, for those who followed the politics of the United States in the last few years (please forgive me for the US-centric-ness of the following few paragraphs!). Even with equal access to identical information, people can vary a LOT in their understanding of what are facts and what are lies.

This illustrates the power of propaganda—and propaganda in the US isn’t even centralised. Some media outlets and individuals (political leaders and analysts) have more say on what should be viewed as the truth, but parties without significant power—small foreign and domestic interests, fringe political organisations, conspiracy theorists, regular folks—have also made critical contributions to the “fake news” phenomenon in the US. There haven’t been apparent coordinations between these parties;  little concerted effort has been made to create one coherent story out of the many tales told.

In China, the propaganda effort is centralised, coordinated, free of distractions from competing story lines. The One Story the government decides on is repeated, over and over again, on newspapers, in shows, in textbooks, on signs on the streets, on social media. To put it another way, when it comes to political discourse, the country is designed to be an echo chamber with 1.4 billion people. Over time, the One Stories inevitably become firmly held beliefs—so firmly held that even if the people are exposed to facts, they no longer believe in them.

This is especially true when the source of the facts are countries with strong traditions of freedoms of speech and press, where the facts are often laid out with a critical eye to the administration and with vastly different opinions attached to them. While we view the latter as evidences that the values we embrace are alive and well—a critical eye to the administration means the Fourth Estate is doing its job, and the different opinions means freedom of speech gets to live another day—people who haven’t been exposed to these values tend to interpret these things as signs of weakness of the government. They may think the Chinese government is better than its counterparts elsewhere because no one is penning scathing criticisms against it. They may think the Chinese government is stronger because it unifies the opinions of their people—the failure of which, they’ve been taught, would lead to social chaos and economic free-fall.

The Chinese population has also been “immunised” against the truths that may be exposed about their government by a propaganda talking point used since Chairman Mao’s days—that the “Imperialist” western world, particularly the United States, is always scheming its downfall. The phrase often used is 美帝亡我之心不死 (”The heart (intention) of Imperialist US to bring us down will never die”). Unfavourable truths exposed must therefore be part of the “bring down China” scheme. This decades-old demonisation of the political apparatus of the US and Europe also prepares the people to accept what most would see as outrageous conspiracy theories: for example, in March 2020, the Ministry of Foreign Affairs claimed that the US Army intentionally planted COVID in Wuhan during the 2019 Military World games. “Foreign interference” becomes a frequent and convenient scapegoat for policy decisions gone wrong, sometimes to a (somewhat) hilarious effect ~ for example, a Taiwanese journalist calculated the cost required for the CIA to fund the 2019 Hong Kong Protests, as the Chinese government had claimed—and it turned out that the CIA was too poor to do it. 

(Many of us in the US would probably laugh at the idea that our government is capable of secretly paying 2 million foreign-language speaking strangers to show up together in one march.) (It can’t even get the COVID relief payments to its own people right over a period of months.)

(Fun trivia for turtles! As 美帝=“Imperialist US” is the synonym of a feared, imaginary super-villain—super organised, super efficient, super everywhere and super impossible to take down—c-BJYX, the indestructible No. 1 CP fandom in China, has been nicknamed “美帝 cp” by those not so enamoured with it.)

Finally, there’s the psychological factor. Once a set of beliefs becomes personal truths, listening to alternatives can be very upsetting (for those in the US: imagine the blue voting block made to listen to Fox News). Hence, even when people gain access to the facts later—for example, when they study/work abroad, even emigrate—they often don’t take advantage of the access. Instead, they remain logged in in the Chinese social media sites where they’re comfortable with not only the politics but also the language and the friendships they’ve built, and continue to immerse themselves in an environment heavy with CCP propaganda. They remain defenders of the Chinese government; some have even gone out and harass people who disagree with it, in the name of freedom of speech that their country of origin never offered to them.

Censorship, of course, is an important component of building a One Story echo chamber, and I should add a note about it: censorship in China comes in vastly different strengths. The restrictions on LGBT+ issues, for example, are fairly lax, relatively speaking—“homosexuality” remains a term one can find on their internet and a topic the administration continues to address, and while BL dramas are censored, their adapted versions, along with highly publicised discussions of their original material, have so far been tolerated. The strictest form of Chinese censorship would’ve allowed neither: any mention of the 1989 June 4th Tiananmen Square massacre , for example, is immediately removed, including any hints that the event may have happened. When the former leader of the Chinese government, Jiang Zemin (江澤民), was rumoured to have passed away, the censorship apparatus went so far as to remove all mentions of Jiang, which also happened to mean “large rivers”. Chinese netizens therefore joked that major rivers had ceased to exist in China that day, as one couldn’t find any information about them online.

(LGBT+ activists have therefore remained optimistic about the future of their campaign, despite the current state of affairs. To put it simply: the Chinese government has bigger fish to fry. Sexual minorities haven’t had major clashes with the administration, haven’t embarrassed the Chinese government with their demand for rights as the ethnic minorities—the Uyghurs, the Tibetans, the Mongolians etc did. Political dissidents, including the millions in Hong Kong, are also (far) ahead in the ranking of fish size.)

For most issues, the censorship effort sits somewhere in the middle and is often inconsistent over time. The people, therefore, often have knowledge that an event has happened — even when the event is considered, beyond the Great Firewall, damaging to the reputation of the Chinese government. However, critical information is often missing in their knowledge, or is heavily distorted. For example, overseas Chinese citizens have insisted that the motivation of the 2019 Hong Kong Protests was economic, echoing the longstanding CCP propaganda that Hong Kongers have been jealous of China’s prosperity (reality: China’s GDP per capita was $10,268 USD in 2019, and Hong Kong’s, $48,713—more than 4 times higher). They missed out a critical fact: while the fast economic growth of China has created some unease—Hong Kongers have always known the Chinese government has only tolerated them and their freedoms for their ability to generate wealth—what has truly ignited Hong Kong’s anger is the Chinese government’s violation of the 1984 Sino-British Joint Declaration, and the terms it had agreed upon to get back the then British crown colony. Hong Kong hasn’t been demanding autonomy and freedoms because it’s a troublemaker, but because these things were promised to the city as conditions of the 1997 handover. As residents of the world’s third largest financial centre, Hong Kongers are diligent drafters and executioners of contracts (which international treaties are) and above all, faithful believers of them. For an asker (the Chinese government) to claim a contract as “historical”  because it has received the goods (Hong Kong) and no longer feels a need to pay (allow Hong Kong 50 years of freedoms and autonomy) is offensive to the principle, the very heart and soul of the city. 

(Gg’s former boss was a Hong Konger, and his experience working for him was a rather accurate reflection of Hong Kong’s view on business. What made an impression to Gg—that the posters should be without rips and misprints, even if these imperfections were not the fault of the design company—is a no-brainer to the Hong Konger in me reading the interview. Delivering high quality goods and services isn’t an act of kindness but rather, of professionalism and respect for the contract.)

(This interview is a highly recommended read, for those who’ve missed it!)

(One more example of “conveniently missed critical information”: remember GG’s show on Chongqing? Did you know the underground bombing shelters were not built by the Communist government, but the Nationalist government that was still ruling China during WWII?)

Anyway, where was I?

Right. We’re getting to 3): People are not getting the facts on the political situation in China because they’re not interested in current affairs.

Some—well, many— people are not interested in politics.

Some of you may be thinking: well, I’m not interested either. I follow politics because it’s important.

Why is it important? Because political engagement means you can do something about the many ills of the society, speak for those who cannot, force the government to change by voting, by voicing your opinion, by going to marches and protests etc.

What if you follow politics and still can’t do most of these things? What if, if you do choose to do these things, the price you pay may be astronomical? Will you still follow politics or devote your time, your energy to something else, something you’ve got more control over, something that won’t be as saddening, frustrating because it’s something you can actually change?

3) is therefore intricately related to why people often don’t do anything, even if they manage to find out about the facts.

There’re no national elections in China. Marches and protests are practically banned because while the Chinese Constitution guarantees the freedom of assembly (as it does freedom of speech and press; Article 35), it also explicitly states that "Citizens of the People’s Republic of China, in exercising their freedoms and rights, may not infringe upon the interests of the State, of society or of the collective, or upon the lawful freedoms and rights of other citizens.” (Article 51) — ie. the freedoms and rights only go as far as if they do not stand in the government’s way. Social media and all communications platforms are under constant surveillance, and so only opinions tolerated by the government is allowed... 

And so, the fact, social ill that has broken your heart—you can’t tell for sure if it isn’t talked about because the government has censored it, how many people know about it and more importantly, how many among the people who know about it will agree with your take. If you break your silence and voice your concerns, how many people will have your back, even if you also conceive them as victims of the social ill? If the social ill is the lack of rights of a minority group, for example, will they appreciate your speaking out, or will your “rocking-the-boat” make things even worse for them? A heavily watched net means communications with the oppressed/vulnerable social groups are often filled with obstacles, if not outright impossible. You don’t know how these groups feel; you don’t even know how many affected individuals are there. You watch the and news and shows and they all talk about how wonderfully things are going; how everyone seems so hopeful and positive and happy with their lives—are you the only person feeling that way? Are you wrong? If you speak out then, will you be yelling into the void, or worse, yelling at the police who “invites” you for a chat in the police station? To speak for those who do not have a voice to speak, are you ready, willing to take the risk of also becoming one who no longer has a voice to speak? Is your family ready? 

To put it another way: the opportunity cost of “doing something” about the political situation can be astronomically high in China, compared to the opportunity cost of us doing something similar in our own country. 

If I want to support the LGBT+ population in my part of the US, for example, I can do so effectively with minimal investment and most importantly, with minimal risk. By pasting a rainbow flag on this Tumblr post, for example, I’ve already signalled to those who need support on this issue that I’m ready to give mine. And this “signal” of mine will join the hundreds and thousands on the site, collectively telling the activists doing the “on the ground” fighting that they’re not alone; that they have my vote of support. I pose no danger to myself in doing so; no one will accuse me of, arrest me for infringing upon the interests of the State and the Collective. The rainbow flag, a display of my stance, will not turn into a blurred blob the next time I look at it, transform overnight from a symbol of solidarity to a warning sign to those who may wish to join the cause. There’s no danger for me, even, to carry an actual, huge rainbow flag to Pride, perform my activism in person. I don’t have to worry about my phone already giving away my identity as a protester to the government, especially in post-COVID times. I don’t need to watch out for plain clothes pretending to be my allies. I don’t have to look at the many surveillance cameras present and wonder if I’ll get blacklisted as a troublemaker.

Am I still being tracked and taken pictures of? Possibly. But for this cause, at least, I’m not afraid that these information will be used to arrest me. If I were arrested, I know there'll be lawyers and activists who would come to my aid. LOUDLY. ANGRILY.

I’m not afraid. Period. I’m having fun. And I doubt I can say the same if I try to carry a rainbow flag to Tiananmen square and march there.

This vast difference in the opportunity cost of taking political action is the reason why I’ve refrained from demanding those who live under authoritarian dictatorships to stand up for their neighbours who’ve been oppressed / bullied by their governments. I’ve refrained from criticising them for looking away, minding their own business. Do I wish they’ve take action? Of course I do. Am I aware that their lack of action is potentially more harmful because of the frequent atrocities happening around them? Yes. But I also understand that going on a fight is far more frightening when one doesn’t even have a sense of how many will join their side of the fight; I understand that fighting for what one deserves—freedoms, rights, justice—should never equal martyrdom, and just because a regime has elected to put equal signs between the two doesn’t mean those equal signs should ever be there. I remind myself that, to ask the people in any authoritarian dictatorship to stand up for a political cause is to ask them to make sacrifices that we, as people in relatively free societies, do not need to make when standing up for the same cause. In a country where a father demanding the truth about the milk product poisoning of his own son got jail time for “eliciting social disorder”, to stand up for even a single issue, no matter how small that issue is, requires courage that I’m not sure I have.

I can’t ask anyone to do anything I may not be able to do myself.

And this is why I, too, have chosen to support these people, even if many of them are single-issue activists, even when many support the Chinese government on other issues that matter. For example, the late Dr Li Wenliang, one of the eight COVID whistleblowers in China who passed away from the disease, was an opponent of the Hong Kong Protest, but I still (greatly) appreciate, respect him for what he did. As long as they’re not actively helping the government to cause (more) harm to others, as long as their cooperation with their government falls within what is demanded of them as citizens, they have my support. Why? Because most people who speak out in China cannot afford to stand up for more than one cause before it becomes dangerous for them. Because even if it’s only a tiny vulnerable social group, one small minority that makes a tiny step towards more rights, more freedoms, more justice, it’s still a victory in a country where rights, freedoms and justice are luxury items for those with neither political nor economic power. Because those who’re not part of the ruling class cannot afford to cherry pick their allies, cannot afford to in-fight when the ruling class already holds absolute power. Because I still believe in pay-it-forward, that most people who’ve benefited from someone standing up for them, even for one small incident, one minor cause, is more likely to stand up for someone else.

This is, admittedly, not always an easy choice to make—not for me, at least. I do get frustrated, can’t help but think at times that those who subscribe to and spread propaganda are, to a certain extent, corroborators of the atrocities committed by their government. (So, to those who’ve felt this frustration, you’re not alone!). And the Hong Konger in me has every reason to be furious with everything about China right now—all I could think of, when I listened to Gg singing 異鄉人 Foreigner the other night, are all the Hong Kongers fleeing the city now, as refugees, because of their political beliefs.

But for now, I’m hanging on. I’ve been able to tell myself that given the country’s political reality, given its tradition of collectivism (which tends to view confrontational dissent with scorn), the paths to freedoms, to equal rights and acceptance, will not be the same as what I’ve seen, what I’ve wished for. They’ll likely be slow; They’ll likely be long and winding, taking three steps forward and two steps back; they’d likely be unexpected in places, offer us surprises —

And since it’s Chinese New Year / Valentines and I’m feeling brave (irresponsible?), I’d venture a little bit of speculation and say this ~ yes, I’ve wondered if one of these many paths may be trodden, intentionally or not, by two beautiful male idols and their millions of turtles. Is it wishful, fantastical thinking? I’d be the first to admit the answer is yes. But the BJYX scheme has been so well executed as of now, so effective that I can’t help but wonder if it’s leading towards some sort of a goal, whether devised by the humans involved or by the gods/Fates who, as c-turtles have said so romantically, have been writing an original BL story with our favourite boys. The goal may be personal —simply two people being able to act more like themselves again under the spotlight—or a bit more ambitious…

… Because the sneakers + ice-cream post did catch my attention (will probably have to devote a post on that?). Another small incident that has caught my attention, unrelated to Gg and Dd but can significantly change the path they may be trodding, is this — in June 2020, People’s Daily, the state controlled newspaper, boasted its country’s increasing friendliness towards the LGBT+ communities on Twitter . While the tweet was met with skepticism and soon removed, the message it sent is this: the Chinese government may have figured out the the Western world (in particular, the younger generations) view LGBT+ rights as a measure of progressiveness. While I’m still leaning towards the government maintaining a tight grip on LGBT+ rights within its borders, with the strengthening call to boycott 2022 Beijing Winter Olympics because of the country’s poor human rights record, I can see a glimmer of possibility that the same government may do the unexpected and cater to the queer community for the sake of propaganda.  As I mentioned, the queer community hasn’t caused much headache for the Chinese government, and so it’s far more likely to be chosen as the “benefactors” of such a “we’re a human rights champion too!” propaganda campaign than, say, ethnic minorities and political dissidents. Promoting dissemination of core socialist values has always sat high on the CCP’s agenda list, and its target audience has always included foreign, non-Chinese populations; this effort is known as 大外宣—“The Great External Propaganda”. And who better to cast as leads of an international propaganda campaign on LGBT+ rights than two of its own stars who’ve already demonstrated loyalty to the government, who’ve already garnered international fame from a TV series widely viewed as queer, and who may actually be queer?

(And if—if!!!— this ever happens, may I ask everyone to please consider doing the following? Please do not feel a need to express gratitude. Please do not act as though it’s a gift. Celebrate as you would celebrate anyone in a free country exercising their birthright to live, to love the way they want — no less than that, no more than that.)

(For those who’ve asked ~ as international fans, not allowing the CCP to modify our expectations of how a government should behave may be one of the most effective ways to protect Gg and Dd.)

(I call this learning from the best: get the goods we want (more rights for the people in China), refuse to pay the cost (subscribe to CCP’s propaganda), and RUN! ❤️💛💚)

#pie metas #yizhan #bjyx #pie answers

[zkbigbang]

Hi! Sorry if this has been answered before and I missed it. How closely do authors need to stick to their initial summary submission? If in the process of writing & working with the team, the story changes substantially, is that okay? Thank you all for organizing this event!

Hey, anon! I don't think this has been asked or answered before, so thanks for the new question!

Like a few of our recent asks, I can't really give you a 100% solid answer—it really depends how your story changes. In most cases, changes should be fine, but keep in mind that your final fic still needs to meet the event requirements (so no switching it to a non-Zutara fic or something rated M or E, and you'll still need to hit word count minimums). Beyond that, make sure that you're keeping your team up to speed with changes to the original idea—for example, if you're writing an arranged marriage fic and you decide that you need to switch the reason for the arranged marriage, your team will probably still be comfortable with the project, but if you suddenly go from no content warnings and a happy ending to Major Character Death and a tragic ending (or vice versa), your team may not be as excited about the project as they were before the change happened. Changes to your story are certainly allowed—anyone who's ever written anything knows that plans sometimes change midway through a story—but if it's turning into a drastic change, make sure that you communicate with your team and city mod to make sure everything is still lining up with event requirements and that everyone is still on board.

- Mod SooperSara

#zutara #zutara big bang #zutara big bang 2022 #zkbigbang #zkbigbang2022 #zkbb #zkbb2022

[swashbucklery]

Fic writer review

I was tagged to do this by @amaltheaz​ 💕

1. How many works do you have on ao3? 140!

2. What’s your total ao3 word count? 612,575 which - is a lot of words, but also that’s spread across over a decade of writing.

3. How many fandoms have you written for? 19 on AO3, which is. . .fewer than I’ve written for overall, since some fics from my LJ years I decided not to migrate.

4. Top 5 fics by kudos?

please don’t ever become a stranger (Supergirl, Kara/Lena, E) by a country mile

A Teenage Girl’s Guide to Not Being Possessed by a Demon (Jennifer’s Body, Jennifer/Needy, M) my Yuletide magnum opus

you make a girl go (ooh oh ooh) (Wynonna Earp, Nicole/Waverly, E)

then why am i on your mind (Legends of Tomorrow, Sara/Ava, E) which I think was one of the first explicit-rated fics for this pairing on AO3

all the misfits and us (ho ho ho) (Legends of Tomorrow, Sara/Ava, E) which is also like. Super vintage early-ship Avalance

5. Do you respond to comments? Why/why not? I sometimes do! If I get a comment that really invites dialogue - either because it’s a really great comment, or because the reader has a comment that I want to respond to - I’m more likely to pop back on and respond. A lot of it recently is time; I try to respond back and thank folks but I get my comments via email and I’m not always reading my email on a device where I’m logged into AO3. By the time I get back to my laptop often I’ve forgotten that I’m meaning to reply to it lol. I definitely feel a lot of gratitude every time someone comments and appreciate every one, though. 💕

6. A fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending. Oh, I’m a softie. A big reason I write fic is to give my faves happy endings; if I’m writing angsty fic it’s usually because there’s a specific character angle I want to explore in more detail. i’m going to learn to dance if it takes me all night and day (Sara/Ava, M) is a good example of that. So is as subtle as a brick in the small of my back (Lena, M) which is character work that - fandom was never going to appreciate, but I’m still really pleased with it. That’s probably the darkest of my more recent work.

7. Do you write crossovers? Yes and I maintain that writing between CWverse shows is writing crossover fic I’M LOOKING @ YOU THAT ONE FIC CHALLENGE THAT DISAGREES WITH ME. I mean, within CWverse I’ve written a fair bit. More broadly it sort of depends; I’ve done it but it’s tough to get the universes and characters to match up. If I’m trying to cross over two things that are really disparate I’m more likely to turn it into an AU instead.

8. Ever received hate on a fic? Lol there was one super weird anon who had a vendetta against the Nora/Mona ship on principle and they left an anon comment calling me gross. Joke’s on them; they’re gross.

Otherwise, no. I definitely did get some hate for just like. Liking Kara/Will on principle, but I think the folks that were doing that got bored of me long before I posted that fic; people have been quite respectful so far.

9. Do you write smut? Do I write smut. My bread and butter is kissing with feelings of course I write smut.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen? If someone has they haven’t told me about it!

11. Ever had a fic translated? I have had a few requests; tbh I struggle because I’m so particular about my words and the way I communicate. Because my name is on it I get worried about things being translated in a way that changes my writing’s meaning, so I’m hesitant if it’s being translated to a language I can’t read.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic? Yessss and they are SO FUN. I’m still super proud of Within My Heart There Is Another Heart and also: band au.

13. All time fav ship? Oh you know I can’t pick. I love all my ships equally and I really do mean that; there are so many facets each time I love a pairing and I rarely OTP hard enough to stick to one at a time. Gossip Girl and Legend of the Seeker will always have warm fuzzy places in my heart because that’s where I met the fandom nursing home roommates; I loved Agents of Shield for so long but gosh has the MCU wronged me post-Endgame, Supergirl and Legends are holding special places in my heart right now but I am very very much into like. Twelve ships at a time, so I don’t think I can choose a favourite.

14. WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? You know, I’m not sure. I’m pretty good at letting go of WIPs that just aren’t working or just won’t be written. I do feel sad for some of the fic ideas that I’ve daydreamed about during this past year that hasn’t even made it to an outline because of how much/hard I’ve been working, but I’m trying to be gentle with myself in terms of how much creative production I can really expect of myself during a global emergency.

15. Writing strengths? Um, porn. Definitely definitely smut. And I say that as like - the thing I’m most proud of in my writing is that I’m able to infuse my smut with character development and details. It’s really important to me that if I am going to write explicit scenes, it’s advancing the emotion or the relationship and that you can see why it’s these two people having sex and not just any two people. I’m also very proud of my character voice and being able to connect with the characters I’m writing.

16. Writing weaknesses? I definitely have trouble being patient with myself to write endings. I don’t know why but that’s often the trickiest part of a story for me.

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic? I think my biggest worry would just be getting the meaning correct. I’m very comfortable with being articulate in English, and I speak French but like. When I am using French I can communicate well but the nuance and the idiomatic stuff is not there beyond the basics; there are lots of details I miss because it’s very much a second language for me not to mention the regional idiosyncrasies (I know a blend of Parisian and Quebecois French and they’re quite different when you get down to the details). I think single words here and there yes but with dialogue I’d really want to make sure I was getting the meaning right and I think that’d be a huge learning curve.

18. First fandom you wrote for? Buffy the Vampire Slayer and bless the internet for losing those stories to time. They were my very best work but also I was 13 years old and there are limits to how good a writer you can be when you’re that young.

19. What’s your fav fic you’ve written so far? All of them? I think each fic that I’ve written I’m proud of for different reasons. I’m quite proud of my more recent Wonder Woman fic, and I’m really enjoying sk8er Kara AU. I’d also love to quietly promote some of my non-Avalance Legends works; I’m very proud of them and they never get as much love as other ships do.

I’m not sure who to tag with this but if we’re mutuals and you write fanfiction I’d love to see your responses!!

#writing tag #memery #j swashbucklery mcinternetface: professional cryptid #fandom nursing home roommates association

[onlyanidala]

onlyanidala fic archive

These are fics with titles E-I.

A-D     J-P     Q-T     U-Z

searchable desktop version available here

more anidala fics can also be found in our fic tag!

the link for each fic can be found by clicking the title!

Title: edges of the world Author: glompcat Status: WIP/Unupdated Rating: T Summary:  Leia Organa finds herself stuck in a strange alternate/parallel universe where the Empire never came to exist. Meanwhile, trying to navigate a galaxy ruled by the Sith weren’t exactly the Jedi Trials Leia Skywalker had expected. Or: Leia from a universe where Anakin never fell and canon Leia switch places. Now the two of them - and everyone else around them - have to deal with the consequences of their dimensional swap.

Title: eros turannos Author: emerald-leaves Status: complete Rating: R Summary:  Love the Tyrant. Oderint dum metuant- Let them hate as long as they fear. AU set in time around the Clone Wars. Note: This fic has unfortunately been removed from Fanfiction.net. However, a PDF is available upon request. 

Title: the exchange Author: misslearn Status: WIP Rating: T Summary: The Daughter has a bad day and it irrevocably changes the fate of the galaxy, twice over. Or: ROTS Obi-Wan and Anakin are swapped with their younger, TPM, selves. It changes things, in both parallels.

Title: five weddings and a funeral Author: skywalkersamidala Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  Padm��'s feeling gloomy about her perpetual singleness, but everything changes when she meets an attractive stranger at her sister's wedding.

Title: flat tire Author: skywalkersamidala Status: complete Rating: G Summary: Who knew something as simple as getting a flat tire could change the entire course of your life?

Title: for a moment Author: shelivesfree Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  And, just for a moment, all the worries and concerns that troubled the young couple cease to exist. Fade away to just this. Husband and wife. Asleep. Dreaming of the sweet little life they will soon bring into the world and into their hearts.

Title: for a sith to love a jedi Author: silverdaye Status: WIP Rating: R Summary:  Jedi Knight Padmé Amidala, the Heroine with No Fear, has crash landed on a moon after a starship fight with Darth Vader. Now the two enemies are stuck on a strange moon with strange rocks that prevents them from accessing the Force. They form an uneasy truce to leave the other alone. Yet after Vader sees Amidala bathing, she keeps coming back to him and he can't keep his mind off of her.

Title: for you, i’ll risk it all Author: estrangedlestrange Status: complete Rating: G Summary:  Darth Vader was certain he had killed Padmé Amidala on Mustafar, but when a rebel broadcast reveals she is alive, he will stop at nothing to free her from what he assumes is captivity. Former Senator Padmé Amidala was certain her husband had been killed on Mustafar, but after seeing Vader across the room during a mission, she is sure that she had been lied to. Knowing the truth, she seeks out her husband, either to bring him back to the light or kill him, which ever was necessary.

Title: friendly competition Author: skywalkersamidala Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  Playing Quidditch is awfully difficult when you’re in love with the rival Seeker. Snapshots of Anakin and Padmé’s 7 years at Hogwarts.

Title: fruits of malice Author: therealthing Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  In an alternate universe, Anakin Skywalker was taken from his mother at the age of four. He was raised as Darth Vader in a loveless, brutal environment. His life takes an interesting turn when he has an encounter with a certain senator from Naboo.

Title: future imperfect Author: therealthing Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  A time travel story in which Anakin Skywalker is sent to the future to witness the consequences of his actions.

Title: fundamental force carriers Author: tanarill Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  The Sith Lord Darth Vader lived his life. He probably didn't live it well, but he lived it as well as he knew how. At the end there, he'd even managed to woman up and kill Sidious. But he was dying, and at peace with the past. The past wasn't at peace with him.

Title: getting home to you Author: irnan Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  Anakin always said it was Padme's fault, but he was the one who spotted that broom closet. Fluff.

Title: the girl from harvard Author: shelivesfree Status: complete Rating: M Summary:  Absence makes the heart grow fonder. It also makes it grow more paranoid. Padme is in her last year of Harvard. Anakin has just started at the University of Chicago. Though they won't admit it, their long-distance relationship is taking it's heavy toll. Will their love prevail or will the distance prove too much for both of them?

Title: give me a signal Author: stranestelle Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  When Padmé Amidala is unable to contact Coruscant while negotiating a loan on Scipio, the Senate suspects trouble, and sends Anakin Skywalker to go check on her. Of course, the resourceful senator isn’t really in any trouble – don't flatter yourself, Rush Clovis – but there’s definitely some brewing.

Title: hand in my hand and we promise to never let go Author: gemma Status: complete Rating: M Summary:  Anakin Skywalker was sent to build an elite Jedi team to help end the ten-year Clone Wars. Jedi Knight Naberrie trains hard to be selected and grows closer to the Jedi Master in the process. But with Jedi falling every day in battle, is it safe to follow your heart? Or will war take what's most precious to Padme?

Title: the hardest path Author:  catiiasofia & misschrisdaae Status: complete Rating: G Summary:  Padmé does what she has to for her family. Series: Three Paths Not Followed

Title: heart of a sith Author: therealthing Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  Fourteen years have passed since the inception of the Empire. Darth Vader has been asked to go to Alderaan for an unusual reason, one that Vader soon discovers will change his life forever.

Title: heirs of light and darkness Author: skywalkersamidala Status: complete Rating: R Summary:  After escaping the Jedi purge two years ago made him the most wanted fugitive in the galaxy, Anakin Skywalker has at last been captured by the Empire. He expects to be killed, but Lady Padmé Amidala, the imperial heir, has other ideas.

Title: heretic pride Author: fialleril Status: WIP/Unupdated Rating: G Summary:  Like most Republic citizens, the Naberries have never spent much time thinking about the Jedi. But that changes with the birth of their daughter Ilaré. (Or, the AU where the third Naberrie daughter is a Jedi, Padmé offers Naboo as a sanctuary for runaway slaves, Shmi is a conductor on the Tatooine freedom trail, and Anakin jump starts a reformation. Or maybe a heresy. It all depends on your point of view.)

Title: hidden Author: disco shop girl Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  Anakin is woken from his dream before it can warn him of his fate. Without that fear hanging over him he feels a disturbance in the force, and chooses to leave before it can manifest itself.

Title:  high above the clouds, my love for you is eternal Author: rogue darth skywalker Status: WIP/Unupdated Rating: M Summary:  Modern Aviation AU. Anakin is a pilot, Padme is a flight attendant. When they meet for the first time he is captivated by her. But much to his surprise she has a young son. This is a story about how bonds are broken, how families are made, and how sacrifice is sometimes necessary to get people where they are meant to be.

Title: hold me in your arms and i’m home Author: gemma Status: complete Rating: M Summary:  It's the ten year reunion for students from Coruscant high and more importantly, a long awaited reunion for two former lovers.

Title: home Author: skywalkersamidala Status: complete Rating: G Summary:  In which "Darth Vader" is no more than Anakin's playtime alter ego (happy Skywalker family AU)

Title: hypnotic takin’ over me Author: gemma Status: complete Rating: R Summary:  "By the Force… Just how many times had he seen her like this in his dreams? How many times had he run his fingers over her skin? Filled his hands with her perfect backside? Yet, when he was, by some mercy or a cruel joke, granted true sight of her, he was oblivious."

Title: i do take two Author: skywalkersamidala Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  Thirty years after their clandestine wedding on Naboo, Anakin and Padmé decide to finally do the proper wedding ceremony they never got to have, with all their friends and family present.

Title: i know your type Author: shelivesfree Status: complete Rating: M Summary:  "Am I dead?" It slips out, accidentally. She turns her head towards me, a confused look on her face and tips her head. "Excuse me?" Flashing her an impish grin, I lean casually against the wall. "I must have died and gone to heaven, because you look like an angel." The look she gives me is far from impressed. "Do you use that with all the girls, or am I just lucky?"

Title: i wish i could rewrite the stars Author: gemma Status: complete Rating: G Summary:  Suddenly, forever felt like something that could be real. They could make it real, the two of them together and out of nowhere, tears stung at Anakin's eyes. It just meant so much. Padme loving him too was the stuff of his dreams; something he'd only just dared to believe was possible. But she did.

Title: if blood be the price Author: cadesama Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  Anakin promised to free all the slaves and it is a promise he intends to keep. Struck by visions of a slave uprising on Tatooine, he runs away to join the fight. Five years later, it his new alliance of former slave worlds that the Republic fears, rather than a Separatist threat. Enlisted to negotiate a peace treaty, Senator Amidala is dispatched to find Anakin, alongside Obi-Wan Kenobi, who only wishes to bring his former Padawan home.

Title: imperial obligations Author: skywalkersamidala Status: complete Rating: R Summary:  Padmé's advisors suggest that she get rid of Vader and make a politically advantageous marriage. The Empress is less than pleased. One-shot.Series: The Empress and Her Sith Lord.

Title: in his very soul Author:  catiiasofia & misschrisdaae Status: complete Rating: R Summary:  Ten years ago, the effort to liberate Naboo from Trade Federation control failed. Chancellor Palpatine managed to rescue the young Queen Amidala and two of her handmaidens, formally adopting her as his own. The new father and daughter quickly manipulated the Senate into granting him emergency powers and creating the Grand Army of the Republic, letting the Clone Wars begin. Now, assassins are coming for Padmé Palpatine, and her father has entrusted her safety to his mysterious enforcer, Darth Vader. While neither bodyguard nor charge is happy about this arrangement, there is an attraction they cannot ignore.

Title: in search of absolution Author: rogue darth skywalker Status: complete Rating: G Summary:  Padme bit her lip as she placed one last post-it that had the name 'Shmi Skywalker' written on it. She didn't speak. She knew he needed a moment to think - to process what she was silently asking him. 'Are you ready to accept her forgiveness'"She'd want to come to her only son's wedding," She said. He shook his head, "I don't think so. After everything…"

Title: in the past Author: silverdaye Status: WIP Rating: T Summary:  It's been two months after Bespin, and Luke Skywalker is trying to come to terms with the events that happened there. During a dogfight with Darth Vader, both of their fighters crash. When they recover, they both find themselves on Coruscant at the end of the Clone Wars. Vader still aims to claim his son, but Luke has been taken to the Jedi Temple where he meets Anakin Skywalker.

Title: it’s a dangerous love affair Author: gemma Status: complete Rating: M Summary:  Lies, masks, blood and sex. The criminal underworld will swallow you up and spit you out again. One wants revenge and the other wants peace. Can their affair bring the downfall of the two biggest gangs of the underworld?

Title: it’s like deja vu all over again Author: shadowsong26 Status: complete Rating: M Summary:  Three days ago, Padme Amidala closed her eyes for the last time in a sterile white room on an asteroid at the edge of nowhere. Three days ago, she opened them again on a sleek, chrome starship, watching Dorme putting on the finishing touches to Corde's headdress, her own weighted braids a comforting blanket on her back. Padme decides to change things, decides she can save Anakin (and the Galaxy) this time. Except, as time passes, she starts to realize things aren't happening exactly the way she remembers...

Title: (it’s not so bad) being dead like me Author: estrangedlestrange Status: complete Rating: T Summary:  Recently deceased Anakin Skywalker (killed in an taco truck explosion) finds himself not in the after life but recruited as the newest member of the undead, he’s become a grim reaper. He’s told that it’s his destiny but really he thinks it’s just rotten luck. Rotten except for the fact that one of his fellow reapers is Padmé Amidala, the most beautiful woman Anakin’s has seen, dead or alive. As he struggles to come to grips with his death and his new role in the universe, Anakin finds that taking souls isn’t the easiest job out there, he also finds himself falling in love. One-shot.

#anidala #fic rec #anidala fic recs #onlyanidala fic recs #star wars #sw #fanfic #sw fanfic

[washymylifeaway]

Haikyuu Angst fanfic recs

EDIT: I added in the ships for each fic LOL, prolly should’ve done it like that from the beginning smh my bad :’)))))

EDIT 2: I made a pt 2 linked HERE

No one asked me to do this, but I’m providing it anyway because we all need a little angst in our lives. Right? Anyway, this entire thing is going to be something you need to read warnings, tags, and summaries in advanced because everything here will be angst. Anyhoo, in no particular order, here comes the sadness... And also don’t come at me for putting fics I’ve recommended in the past,,,, it’s an angst post I have to put all of them.

WARNING: Almost all of these fics deal with either some sort of death, trauma, or mental illness so please I BEG OF YOU to proceed with caution. Also in NO way am I romanticizing any of these things, these fics recs are merely pieces I thought were written extremely well, and that portray major events from multiple perspectives skillfully. If you are struggling, please contact a hotline and get help, you are never in this alone!

National Suicide Hotline: [phone]

boiled frogs by reginagalaxia (E) 91.5k /MatsuHana/ is it possible to hate a character this much? I never realized how much hate/rage I had in me. Really. Like. Imma boutta fight this MF LIKE SQUARE UP. The way I tried to manifest a fake characters death like,,,, Anyway. If my RAGE doesn’t explain how good of a freakin writer they are, then idk what will. (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

In Another Life by LittleLuxray (T) 23k /BokuAka/ it’s a classic, what can I say? You into some BokuAka angst? Here’s the fic. Go right ahead. Don’t be shy :’)

the galaxy is endless (i thought we were, too) by cosmogony (T) 30.9k /KuroKen/ again, a classic. We do love a good soulmate AU tho :)))))))

^^ I didn’t write much here cause I wrote my general thoughts on a different post (linked here) so yea it’s not that I don’t like the fic, it’s just that I didn’t want to be more redundant than I already am LOL.

Oikawa's Last Wish/es by DanaiaCake (G) 5.1k /IwaOi/ this one, man it’s short but painful LOL. Proof that angst doesn’t have to be long to completely break you ahhahah. It actually has a sequel (which is less angsty), but yea if you like finish this fic and are like broken, read it for some.... glue?

The Sky and Guilt Are the Only Feelings I Have Left by oopsthisisqueertoo (NR) 267.7k /BokuAkaKuroo/ ngl I picked it up as a rec from someone else after misreading that it was THIS long haha. But like I kept reading, and the suspense omg. It HAS a happy ending, so if you’re reading it and you start to feel empty, push through (tho take breaks) and finish because it DOES end HAPPY. (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

Made to be Broken by todxrxki (T) 8.1k /KuroKen/ this one focuses more on the after than the build up, and it made me so sad (as it should cause this is literally an angst fic rec post smh @ myself). I usually don’t cry too much but this one made the waterworks turn ON. Sighhhhhhhhhhh. Bless Akaashi.

Even Though it All Went Wrong by plumtrees (T) 9.2k /MatsuHana/ THIS IS THE REASON THIS POST CAME TO BE. I love this fic with all my heart (or what’s left of it). Like LOVE as in, this fic really broke me beyond just breaking me. Like. When Oikawa says what he says to Mattsun after the thing (you’re sorry __ _____ __ ____) and the Iwa right after (we know __’__ ___ ______ to make you ____ __ ____) (if you’re wondering wtf I’m putting here, just ctrl F you’re sorry and you’ll see), you cannot believe how hard that hit. GOD. (I am okay if you’re wondering :’)) This is my #1 favorite angst fic of all time and if you are okay mentally and have read the tags and warnings and are fine with them, then please read it. (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

Better For Us Both by abrandnewheart (M) 15.7k /SakuAtsu/ THE MUG FIC. There was a sequel and when I saw that it took me another week to read it cause I was like,,, am I ready to have my heart break again? No LOL. But the sequel is actually not as angst, so if you want like a semi-broken whatever, just read the sequel LOL. It’s so sad and it made me physically hurt every time someone even mentioned mugs afterwards (LOL why am I so dramatic but it’s the truth :///). Go ahead and hurt with me.

Crumbling Foundations by Captain_Hughes_ZU, ToshiChan (T) 106.3k /MULTI/ I was debating whether or not to put this fic cause it actually doesn’t even have the angst tag (which I personally think it should). Honestly, it’s more a trauma fic than an angst fic idk I just wanted to put it somewhere because it’s written super well and although it was technically a ‘happy ending’ the interviews after prove else. Despite only being rated T, it’s got some intense TW so (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

arbitrary nature of thought. by wadingpool (NR) 5.6k /SunaOsa/ this....... ah... ahh.... The pain...... I really love the SunaAtsu friendship agenda. The ending was happy (I keep doing this LOL) but the build up to the break,,,,, AHHHH. Yea the ending was really heartwarming....... BUT THE BEGINNING. Yea it really jumbled me up..... JFLJDSFLKJHDLFHS

How To Be A Kick-Ass Brother: A Guide by Miya Atsumu by Egosdelirium (E) 25k /SakuAtsu + SunaOsa/ what personal vendetta do I have against Osamu? Nothing, literally nothing he just happens to always suffer in the fics I choose oops. This fic is one I really like, and it portrays the close outsider’s perspective on a horrific event really well. I was iffy on putting this in because it’s not really the angst type I was going for (more death less trauma?) but I really liked this fic, and while I was making my end note, I kept thinking about it so yea. Atsumu best boy. (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

You might be thinking, done already? Wellllllll there were a lot of fics where I decided against putting them on (cause I felt like it didn’t really match what I wanted to be recommending but idk what the theme was LOL oops but yea I would look at a fic and think well it is angst but not the right TYPE of angst y’know?) and I really hate reading angst (there’s a lot of days where I shouldn’t cause my mental health said no thanks LOL). Also I wanted like FULL angst fics, but most of them have like happy endings (which made some of these iffy and is good but also it wasn’t what I wanted to put :////) So yes, I may add to this post (we��ll see) but like it’ll depend on whether I can convince myself that reading angst at 4 am is a good idea LOL. (pls recommend me some too!)

#angst #angst fic recs #haikyuu fanfic rec #fanfics #fanfic recs #anime #manga #iwaoi #matsuhana #kuroken #bokuaka #sakuatsu #sunaosa #sunaatsu #karasuno #multiship #bokuakakuroo #kuroobokuaka #guys angst it up #anyway have fun crying #lol my bad #im sorry #but am I? #no lol #it's ok #i made myself sad making this #haha oops #i'm fine tho LOL #haikyuu fic recs #haikyuu!!

[mystickitten42]

AO3 Tag Game

Thanks so much for the tag @peachpety 😘 I thoroughly enjoyed reading yours.

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 27 (+ 2 in fests) 2. What is your total AO3 word count? 134,448 (But if things go according to plan, I’ll be adding another 50-60k to that in 2-3 months). 3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they? I’ve only ever published HP (all Drarry, except for one rare pair that’s part of an upcoming non-anon fest). But before I got into Drarry, I experimented with some dystopian Malec (Shadowhunters). 4. What are your top five fics by kudos? Potter’s Ravine (E, 23k)

Harry is undeniably numb. Still reeling from the sudden death of his godfather, he’s back at the Dursleys and everything seems hopeless. One day bleeds into the next. But, as they say, nature abhors a vacuum…

Draco is unimpressed. The Dark Lord and his infernal giant snake have taken over Malfoy Manor and he’s confined to his rooms. He feels like a prisoner and it’s just not right. He’s a Malfoy. Itching for confrontation he decides to go visit Harry Potter.

Things don’t go according to plan.

The Time in Between (E, 42k)

Harry never wanted to be the Chosen One. Draco refused the Dark Mark. Together, they set out to create something new. But can they outrun their destiny?

~ or ~

The one where Harry sets everything on fire, Draco confronts the darkness within, and Narcissa will do anything to keep them safe.

Light up Your Lust (E, 1k)

All it takes is a Cornish Pixie, a spilled potion and everything becomes quite clear.

Malfoy sputters, “That’s ridiculous, Potter. I don’t want to – ”

“Then tell me to stop.”

But the only noise Malfoy makes is a breathy sigh as Harry dives back in and kisses his jaw, plunders his incandescent lips, before he follows the glowing path south…

The Naughty List (E, 2K)

In which Hermione takes Harry to an art class and the model is familiar, blond, and pointy.

Malfoy steps up onto the round platform and casually lets his robe slip to the ground. As he adopts a pose, Harry’s jaw drops. Draco Malfoy is a work of art.

“Close your mouth, Harry,” Hermione whispers, and Harry does.

When Death Comes Calling (T, 2k)

It’s All Hallows’ Eve and as Harry investigates a string of seemingly related deaths, there’s one he hopes to prevent. He looks over Harry’s shoulder and Harry turns too. They both see it, the dark translucent figure making its way to shore.

~ Or ~ Getting together in the face of Death. Literally.

5. Do you respond to comments, why or why not? OMG, I appreciate each and every single comment I receive. When I’m feeling down, I go back and re-read comments. I do try to respond to every one, but sometimes it takes a little while (depending on spoons, life, and writing deadlines). 6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? I love happy endings, so most of my fics end happily or hopefully. But I have one fic, written for My Bloody Valentine 2021, that does not have a happy ending.  You’re the Only One for Me (M, 1k, MCD, mind the tags)

After all these years, Draco's still the one.

7. Do you ever write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve every written? I have not written any crossovers... yet. I might. I might not. But I have contemplated Drarry with Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (I’m a big fan, hence the ‘42′ in my pseud), or with Lost Souls (by Poppy Z. Brite, a vampire novel set in New Orleans).

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic? I’d have to say any ‘hate’ I’ve received has been minimal (although it thoroughly bummed me out at the time). But I received a lot of support from fellow Drarry authors and took their advice (deleted the comments without responding to them). Many others have received comments far worse than those I received and it makes me sad. 9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Ha! You may have noticed 4/5 of my top five are rated E. I love reading and writing smut. I’ve mostly written M/M, but I do have some F/F in the works. I adore porn with feelings, and angsty, angry sex that leads to feelings.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge. 11. Have you ever co-written a fic before? I never thought I would (I’m too much of a control freak 😂) but I co-wrote two during Exploding Snap 2021, and I had a blast! It was so much fun, amazingly refreshing, and I would totally do it again. The Stars on the Calendar (T, 2k, with @anaxandria-writes)

Harry accepted there were many things he and Draco would always argue about. He just didn’t think sex would ever be one of them.

Midnight Rendezvous (T, 696 words, with @cequonveut)

The Fat Lady gets an eyeful while portrait hopping down the seventh-floor corridor.

12. What’s your all-time favourite ship? Drarry!!!!! But I also love Grudders, Roarmac (thanks Peach!), Jeddy, Scorbus, Charlie Weasley with pretty much anyone, and various poly ships. Outside of HP, I also have a soft spot for Malec and Jimon (Shadowhunters) and Steve/Ghost (Lost Souls). 13. What was the first fandom you wrote for? HP is the only fandom I’ve published in. But as I mentioned above, I have an incomplete Malec burning a hole in my hard drive. Maybe one day I’ll finish it… or maybe I won’t… 14. What’s your favourite fic you’ve written? As much as I adore writing drabbles and short fics, I really love to become immersed in my longer chaptered fics. All of them are my favourites. I’ve already mentioned my Old Magic series (Potter’s Ravine, The Time in Between, and I’m currently working on the third installment). But my other recent fav is my Wireless fic: Until It All Comes Undone (E, 38k). 

Following his confrontation with Voldemort, Harry returns from King’s Cross Station completely changed. He wakes up at Privet Drive with no memory of his past, the war or magic. Petunia, widowed and suffering from empty nest syndrome, is only too happy to turn Harry into Dudley 2.0.

But something’s not quite right. Plagued by recurring nightmares, Harry can’t help but feel something is missing. A bottle of his cousin’s LSD helps him to forget his worries… Magic may not be real, but the hallucinations and the hot blond he meets all feel pretty magical to Harry.

Having turned his back on his family, Draco is determined to start over and do the right thing. But he’s never made good decisions when it comes to Harry Potter. When Potter—presumed dead, but very much alive—unexpectedly returns, Draco will do anything for a second chance. Even if it means pretending not to know who he is…

This idea burned inside me for nearly a year and refused to be silent. Writing this terrified me, because I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to write it the way I wanted it to be written. Completing this story was an amazing journey and really taught me to believe in myself. (And, of course, I’m eternally grateful to my amazing beta, @peachpety 🥰)

I apologise in advance if I’m double tagging anyone (and, of course, no pressure!) @pennygalleon, @andithiel, @cequonveut, @anaxandria-writes, @eelwinks, @thesleepiesthufflepuff, @evaeleanor

#tagged #tag game #AO3 works #writing #my fic

[dindooku]

As a young student studying Criminology, Gotham was the perfect place to study the thoery of crime. But, that didnt come without it’s own risks. Without your intention, your life becomes intertwined with another’s; a life you had so vehemently tried to repress - and now it was within your grasp; the opportunity held upon a golden pedestal, just waiting for you to take it. In your own desperation to fend off the demons tormenting your soul, can you overcome the very thing your swore against? Or will you succumb to the darkness? When had being bad ever felt so good?

Rating: M/E (swearing, triggers, panic attack (not explicitly said) - alcohol abuse (OC isn’t an addict but doesn’t display healthy relationships with alcohol) - please read the tags. this fic is going to be very dark and twisted so please be warned in regards to further chapters

word count: ~5k

You needed this.

By fucking god you needed this.

You could blame it on your studies, your recent move to Gotham city to study your Masters in Criminology; the perfect setting really. And you could blame it on your stressful move; the house that you're renting not being anything like the photos you viewed online - the water-damaged walls and the odd-looking array of bullet holes in the front room, and maybe even the questionable red stain spotting along the cream-turned-brown carpet towards the bathroom.

But most of all it was this.

Moving to Gotham was the worst-best thing you have ever done. It'd do leaps and bounds for your research and personal evolution, but it was also becoming more and more apparent by the day as to why the little flat you lived in was so cheap; having an address with anything to do with Hell on it was probably a good indication.

Flat 221B, 36th, Hell's Kitchen, Gotham.

Yeah. That's why you fucking needed this.

It was an absolute shithole. You'd only been here for a week and you had experienced more crime than you had been privy to when studying at home. It was a catch 22, move to the most dangerous city you can think of and get 1-1 experience in crime, collecting data for your dissertation; or stay at home, go to a safe city and become some pansy police officer who refused to get their hands dirty.

You were always one for taking risks.

So, as you downed your last home-made margarita and stuffed your bits and pieces into your shoulder bag, you were off out the door.

Tonight was a field day; an excuse to go out and get absolutely trollied all in the name of science. It was just getting late, the sun had set a few hours ago and the Gotham nightlife brought the streets to life; ironically, considering the insanely high murder rates. Some would call you mad, a single, young, attractive woman walking unfamiliar streets at this time of night, in Gotham. And you supposed you were. See, the only reason you were studying crime was out of pure fascination. Fascination, yes. The theory of it, really - how the human mind comprehended such decisions and why you lived in such a society - who branded these rules? Desperation was a word you liked to play with. Its meaning subjective depending on your own reality, really. You had always seen the world differently... criminals weren't inherently bad people to you, they were just often misunderstood, brandished, acting out of desperation at someone else's greed. Obviously, you had the complete and utter fucking mentalists, but even then you could find an argument in their favour - like the Joker; he was misunderstood, torn and thrown around like a rag doll until he made a stand, a particularly violent one, but a stand nonetheless; a stand out of desperation to be heard, to be understood. And deep down you resonated with his actions, being driven to the extremes to be listened to.

You knew exactly how he felt. You had the scars to prove it.

Enough on that, though; you're here for a good time, right? Right. You're going out to forget about the stingy shithole you'll be returning to once the night bleeds into morning, to forget about the mountain of case studies you've yet to work through. It was all a bit overwhelming; thus solidifying your burning need to procrastinate and forget about it all, and what better way to do it than get black-out drunk in a bar you've never been to before?

You weren't an alcoholic by any means, you didn't rely on the sweet burn to see you through the days, but that didn't mean you couldn't revel in the double-ended spear of its toxicity - drinking so much to forget, but its effects only temporary. You were a student, after all, you had to live up to the stereotype?

You scoffed at the thought, murmuring out loud, "Fucking hell." Ok maybe you needed to slow down a little bit... you put the hipflask back in its pouch whilst you continued to walk to your third bar of the night.

You were on a pub crawl of sorts, embarking on your own little quest to scout out the best club in town for further investigation. You were just balancing on that fuzzy tightrope between bliss and blindness, the perfect haze to blur out the dangers of the night and warm your skin despite the bitter cold. You were in your own little world it seemed, and as a bright neon sign for a secluded back alley club came into view, you knew you had to investigate.

"Card." Came the burly voice in front of you. You had to crane your neck up to meet their eyeline, trying your best to pull a serious face and not laugh at the imaginary comedy sketch playing out in your mind.

"Card, you mean ID?" You ask, one eyebrow furrowing in question. You had all the relevant stuff, and deep down you'd be offended if they didn't ask, you'd only just turned 21, a few months ago in fact.

"No, Entry Card, VIP." He reiterates, crossing his hands in front of his chest. You scoff at the idea that a place like this required VIP cards to get in. 'Really? They'd have to pay me to not go in, ha' you humour to yourself, finding the joke a little too funny in your drunken state.

"What's so funny?" The man asks again, a bit more aggressively this time, like he knew you were mocking him in your head. And you were. You knew you shouldn't push your luck, his size easily outmatching yours. But fuck it.

"Nothin sweetheart, just surprised 'tis all," You tease, rolling your eyes as you put your ID away and prepare to leave the queue.

The bouncer can't help himself, "Surprised?"

"Mmm, yes, surprised, or disappointed? You choose." You smirk as you turn away, hips swaying in a drunken swagger that you would never normally possess. Something about you tonight just screamed fucking goddess - and 'don't fuck with me else it will be the last thing you do' - you didn't know why; you were in no state to start a bar fight and win. Maybe it was the tight, black faux leather flares and wrap around corset that filled you with a placebo pill of confidence; but by god did you have a stunning poker face, one that seemed to have caught the eyes of someone other than the bouncer you were antagonising.

A whistle stopped you in your tracks.

You stood on the edge of the pavement, back to the club, your hair flowing slightly in the wind. You tilted your head slightly towards the sound, your minimal movement the only sign of your acknowledgement. You really hated catcallers. It was one of the few things that would really wind you up, your short and temperate anger fizzing and popping under the surface.

"Let her in." Came a new voice. You turned around, eyes landing on an unfamiliar face. He was a tall guy, with an ice-white buzzcut and a sculpted face sporting scars; new and old - his brows knit into a harsh line and his piercing gaze instructing you with just his silent intention. You decide to play along, smirking back at him as you turn and saunter your way back to the entryway. As you walk past the bouncer you position yourself against him, slighting a faint touch of your body to his, sure to leave a whisper of your perfume lingering in the air as a sort of poisonous parting gift - a nicely packaged fuck you.

Your pupils instantly dilated to the sight laid before you. Ok, you take it back. This was no dingey club. Your skin was coated in an inciting shade of red; the coloured theme of the club. It was stimulating, the atmosphere - reigniting that previous cockiness you had been secretly harbouring through the night and twisting it into something still unfamiliar to you, the inner thrumming residing behind your naval indistinguishable from the music reverberating around the club.

The man who had whistled at you had disappeared, so you took this as your opportunity to grab a couple more drinks, to scout the club, of course...

You sauntered over to the bar and after a moment of getting yourself comfortable on the stool, locked eyes with the bartender. They didn't hold the same ferocity as the man before, and you felt your outer guard falling slightly at the soft tones lacing their eyes, their general aura giving off nothing inherently dangerous. They walk over, one hand wiping away at a newly washed pint glass with a rag.

"What can I get you?" They ask politely. They seemed young, too young in fact to be working behind the bar, but now wasn't the time for serious investigating - you highly doubted he was underage, just in fact sporting an inherent babyface. You smile sweetly back at the bartender as you purr your reply, "Whiskey on the rocks, please."

"Oh? Honey that's strong?" He questions, an eyebrow furrowing at your request. You giggle at his innocence.

"Mhm, make it a double." You smirk, and he only reciprocated, pouring a double and a little extra.

"You're new 'round here, aren't you?" He states as he passes over your drink, and you nod as you take a sip, soon following up with a further reply, "That obvious?"

"No, I just would've remembered a pretty face like yours if you'd been here before." He flirts, leaning down onto the bar, elbows sitting comfortably on the dark mahogany surface - it was a tactical move, you knew it, he was getting closer to you by the minute and you noticed his blatant interest the moment he locked eyes with you. You'd play along for a little while, it was good practice anyway, investigating.

You smile before replying, a brief pause between sips to sell your contemplation, "I can tell you're not one for wasting time..." You pause, implying silently for his name.

"Alex." He smirks, holding his hand out to you. You shake it, surprised by the dexterity. But as you thought things were going well, he pulls away sharply, his gaze dropping from you as he scurries back to the other side of the bar nervously. Your face scrunches in confusion, wondering exactly what you'd done wrong.

A firm hand around your waist answers your question.

The presence of another behind you makes you tense momentarily, their forward nature catching you off guard. A hand swirls around the small of your back, stopping at the natural curve of your waist, their palm sitting comfortably in the dip as their fingers latched into your exposed skin. The grip is tight, possessive - possessive for someone you didn't even know the face of. Your nervousness quickly turns into a tizzy, frustrated at the being behind you and their audacity to hold you so. You twist, turning your head to meet the side of their face, eyes rough with your bubbling anger.

The sharp-edged, stubbly profile of a man greets you, a little too close for comfort.

"Alex, two of whatever she's ordered on me, 'kay?" The man says. You roll your eyes at his cockiness, picking up your whiskey glass and downing the rest of the hot honey, burning your throat in the process - but you invited the pain, it's scorch momentarily masking the uninvited heat that was building elsewhere.

"I can order my own drinks, thank you." You scoff, sliding off of the barstool and away from his grasp, picking up your bag so that you can leave.

The man scoffs, using one hand to bring the red-tinted shades sitting on his nose sliding down, tilting his head to give you a better look. You turn and face him at the wrong time it seems, interrupting his very blatant scan of your form. You scoff at his actions, turning harshly to go, muttering to him as you walk past him and towards the exit, "In your fucking dreams."

Yeah - you tell him, girl. Too fucking right, that's what he gets for...that. Maybe you were overreacting, but the way your skin heated like wildfire at his unexpected touch, the way the previously dormant thrumming deep within your stomach tinged with a spark of something you hadn't felt in a long time, a feeling that was unfortunately not one of pleasure to you - you panicked. You'd never reacted like this, but something about his presence was just dominating your senses and you had to get away, to clear your head; maybe it was the alcohol, you didn't know - you didn't care, you just wanted fresh air and five minutes to get whatever the fuck has come over you out of your system.

"I see manners are not your chosen language," The man jokes, but he doesn't bother hiding the icy bitter frustration at your rejection. But you carry on, moving away from his ensuing footsteps.

"Neither are they yours," You retort, turning the corner towards the back exit. But you don't make it to the back exit. The scarred man from before moves from the shadows and grips your upper arm, swivelling you in one motion to face your incessant assailant. You don't give him the privilege of your attention, instead choosing to stare wide-eyed at the ground. Your bubbling anger evolves into something more pertinent, more feral, "What the fuck is it with you guys?" You spit, trying your best to yank your arm free. It was no good, every time you moved his grip on you tightened.

"That's no way to speak to a kind gentleman, is it darling?" The stubble-haired man chides, waving a hand in a dramatic swish as he talks.

"You and gentlemen is a bit of a reach, don't you think? And kind too, don't flatter yourself sweetheart -- hey! Let me go!" You scorn, yanking away harder. Your heart was starting to race now, the phantom ghost of familiar brutish hands that had hurt you before were blurring with your present reality. You couldn't go through that again, no. You'd moved away for a reason, even if it were disguised by your University Degree, the real reason was to get away from him.

Your change in body language seemed to shock both men, and soon the bearded man orders the other to let you go.

"Zsasz, let her go." He says sternly. As soon as his grip is off of you, you practically run to the bathroom, locking yourself in the stall. You close your eyes. You were trying so, so hard to help yourself, but it was just not to be. The last 12 months come crashing down on you, and you were helpless against the murderous gravity of it all. Your panic quickly turned into terror, and no matter how hard you tried to suppress the overbearing feelings blistering your heart, their clutch was now embedded into your conscious and they were working their way out, ripping and tearing, leaving nothing but devastation in its wake. It was brutish, the power of it all; how after all this time those short few moments held such a crippling power over you, a power no matter how hard you tried to overrule, decimated you each and every time. You're so caught up in your emotions that you don't hear the lock on the bathroom click, nor do you hear the faint rustling of a velvet suit making its way towards your stall.

However, you do hear the tap-tap of leather-coated knuckles against the door.

"Fuck off," You spit, not even attempting to mask the raspy panic between each word. The other person didn't say anything, and silence engulfed the room momentarily, only the occasional piercing sounds of your choked panic ripping the hazy-yellow neon light animating the bathroom. The clink of glass to wood brought your head up, your attention distracted and now upon the glass of whiskey being slid underneath the door.

"A peace offering," A familiar voice clarifies. You snatch up the drink and down it in one, desperate for a distraction; a controllable discomfort. You cough roughly at the strength, the new soreness from your rasped panic mixing distastefully with the burn from the alcohol - note taken; don't ever do that again.

You take a second to let the burn cool before speaking, "Thanks...for the drink." 

He doesn't bother with a reply.

Another few moments pass and you feel you have yourself under control. You take in a deep breath and straighten your clothes out as you stand, brushing the stray hairs from your face and trying your best to look presentable despite the absence of a mirror. You unlock the door and move to step out, hand holding the empty glass out aimlessly for the other man to take.

He doesn't take it.

You furrow your brows and pause in your movements, and it is only now you chance a look into his eyes for the first time. The moment your eyes meet his, you regret it. Not because you're scared or frightened, no; you regret it because you know those are eyes you will forever see in your dreams. This man's eyes told you similar tales of the navy shores from home that you had often resided to in search of peace, the lighter hues telling tales of the midwinter sky you would doze under; and the occasional slash of cobalt reflected the darker depths of his soul, mirroring the light of unnamed stars. His eyes painted your soul in a colour you'd yet to see, a colour only he could grace you with, and it made you weak.

You were transfixed, held stationary by his unspoken authority. He raised an eyebrow at you, his understanding all too clear. You broke from your haze and scuffed, a hot blush creeping over your tear-stained cheeks.

Embarrassed couldn't even cover it.

"Fuck," you whispered, wiping away once again at the drying streaks of once warm tears on your cheeks. "FUCK!" You shout louder this time, chastising yourself as you come back to reality. What the fuck are you doing? You're stronger than this?

"How about we fix you another drink, hmm?" He says. You chuckle as you pinch the bridge of your nose, the heavy daze from the whiskey starting to mount its assault on your senses. Fuck it, you came here to get blackout drunk, so you're going to get fucking blackout drunk - for free by the looks of it.

You roll your shoulders and pick your head up, holding it high. "Sure, ugh--?" You say, holding out your hand to shake his as you hint for his name.

He replies with a smirk before turning you towards the door, catching himself before he places a hand at the small of your back, "Roman, Roman Sionis."

"Well, Roman, how about a pitcher or two?" You challenge, "Ever drunk with a student before?"

He didn't reply instantly, but you didn't let him, storming confidently out of the bathrooms and to the bar. You honed in on Alex, and at first he looked excited to see you, but as you approached he saw the darkness in your eyes and instantly knew you were'nt to be messed with. He poured a double shot of Vodka and Coke as quick as he could; it didn't even reach the counter before its contents were emptied by yours truly and slammed back onto the mahogany.

"Another." You growl, and Alex doesn't hesitate, the next drink landing in your hands within moments. You sink this one like the last, face maintaining the deadly glare it had held since you entered the room. Roman was soon at your side, marvelling at your drinking abilities; it was scary actually, how you managed to down your alcohol with such ease, expressionless. His grin faltered on your fourth shot and he pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose, breaking your anamatronic trance and stealing your attention to him; that's better - Roman always got what he wanted, and he wanted you. He raised an eyebrow at your anger, wondering how he could capitalise on this and turn the situation in his favour. But for some reason, he hesitates; the thought of being cruel to you made his skin shiver in an unpleasent way - oddly. See, Mr Sionis was a criminal, a violent, feral monster who, if he did not get his own way, or was undermined or disrespected, made sure that those were the last things said person would inflict - for disrespecting the King of Gotham's underground was a penalty punishable by death. A slow, torturous death, courtesy of his own cynical ministrations. He was the Black Mask, and the Black Mask felt no mercy. Why should he sympathise when he could not receive such pleasures? Others can't have what he cannot, that simply is not fair, its preposterous. And like the narcissistic bastard he was, he reasoned with this part of himself, convincing the little golden figure sat perched on his right shoulder that he was doing the nice thing by not kidnapping you right now and keeping you for himself. Something about you was different, he could sense it - he recognised the brutal blaze swirling in the depths of your eyes. They reflected his own - murderous. And that's when the little red devil on his left shoulder made their attendance known, reinforcing Romans suspicions. This girl had the devil in her, the same devil within him.

"What?" You asked, incredulously. Roman had been staring at you for longer than was comfortable, and you knew he was deep in thought over something. His eyes flicked like an old VHS tape, his physical thoughts and their direction reflecting in the depths of his scrutiny over you.

Roman grinned at his plan. He had to have you, but he knew now that forcing himself was not an option - he had to wait for you to come to him. And what better way than to get someones attention by no longer wanting it? It was the ultimate power play he thought, his excitement at the idea of you being his under your own intention ignited a blistering fire of self admiration within him - Roman Sionis was a fucking genius he thought, no, he knew.

"Nothing Darling, ciao." He replied smugly, his lips stressing a shit-eating grin at his own devious plan. He waltzed away from you to find Zsazs, desperate to let him in on his incredible plan.

You scoff at your dismissal. The fuck was all that about?

Rolling your eyes, your turn to Alex. You take a second to allow the room to catch up with you, "Did you see that?" You ask Alex, moving your head slightly to the side in a nod towards the now retreated Roman. Alex scoffs, placing a pint of water on the bar in front of you. You cut him a look of displeasure but knew you should probably slow down if you wanted to get back safe tonight.

"That guy, my dear, is Mr Sionis." Alex said, lifting his brows as at your confused look.

"Mr Sionis...right, and he is...?" You say, waving your hands in a confused manner.

Alex looked stunted, but continued to serve a few orders before continuing his conversation with you, "Well, Mr Sionis is the owner of this club."

Your eyes widen at the realisation, "The owner?" You mutter.

"Mhm." Alex hummed, amused.

But the conversation took a new direction, a direction Alex was not expecting.

"Tell me about this Mr Sionis, Alex." You murmur, gliding into your soft, convincing voice you used to get information about men.

"Well, he's the owner of this club, and my boss. He pays well." Alex starts, trying his best to close of the conversation.

"Hmm, yes; but what about him? What type of person is he?"

"I don't think--,"

"Alex," you growl, darkly. Your face dropped the sweet smile it had held before and Alex visibly winced. He knew he couldn't say too much, and he didn't know much either, but he also didn't know you, and if living in Gotham had any perks; he knew those eyes - they were the eyes of someone you did not fuck with if you wanted to keep breathing. So, Alex moved across the bar, leaning in on his elbows so he could whisper to you over the loud music; where only the two of you could be heard.

"He, he has a particular personality - colourful, bold,-" Alex starts, his eyes shifting past your figure a few times to make sure he wasnt being watched, "-Possessive. He gets what he wants - always. And he will do anything to do so, there's no limits with the guy. You fuck up, you're done."

"Done?" You whisper back, leaning in closer to Alex, only a hairs breath away.

Alex stalls, trying to find a way to answer your question without sinking himself to that fate. But he doesn't get the chance to, as you're pulling away and turning towards an unknown figure behind you.

The next few moments were a blur.

The next thing Alex knew, there was a face being buried into the hard mahogany of the bar, and the loud crack of the mans nose being broken shook Alex from his trance.

You moved so effortlessly, your movements only so perfect through hours of repetition. You didn't even stumble, and with the effectiveness of your ruminations, practically no attention was drawn to the now escalating scene at the bar.

"On what fucking planet is it ok to grab anyone like the way you just groped me, huh?" You whispered into your assailants ear. They whined and coughed, shifting under the mounting pressure you were placing at their shoulder. You had grabbed them by the arm the moment you felt their hand sliding across your ass, and the quick pinch had you seeing red - moving through muscle memory and destabilising the man by using his own weight against him. He was now bent over the bar, head buried in broken glass, his shoulder ready to pop at any moment. He was at your mercy and your blood turned primitive. You'd had enough of creepy perverts tonight.

"The fuck is wrong with you lady? It wasn't anythin' bad," The man groans, blood pouring from his nose and staining the white shirt he was wearing.

You pressed harder, muffling the pop of his shoulder joint and his cry of pain with a loud laugh, "Say, Frank - how bout you walk out this club now under your own premise before I have you wheeled out in a bodybag?" You sigh.

"The fuck, how'd you know my name was Frank?" he growled, grunting at the pain.

"Not only are you incredibly rude, but you're also rather obnoxious too, you fucking loser." You sneer, shifting his dislocated shoulder further round. He screamed, but only briefly, as you soon shut him up with a face full of glass.

"Fuck off, Frank, and don't come back."

You release him and he instantly turns and scampers away like the injured hyena he was. Rolling your eyes you turn back to Alex, who's eyes are wide with shock.

"Alex..." You mumble, and he gulps, his eyes searching yours out of panic over what you'll do next, "Just fix me a drink and I’ll be off. Sorry for the mess." You say calmly as if nothing happened. And that's the way it seemed, as no one even batted an eyelid to the violent display from moments ago. Alex says nothing but does as he's told, making you up an extra strong rum and coke. You down the drink and place the glass down.

"Where's the emergency exit?" You ask Alex, and he points to the door behind the bar. You smile, sliding him a small tip - hush money - and exit the building.

You made it about five minutes down the road before things began to get weird - real weird. This wasnt the same type of blurry you got from alcohol, this was colourful, dazy.

"Fuck - that fucker drugged me!" You sneer, words merging together as you propped yourself up against a brick wall. You tried to run over the events in your head, wondering where you tripped up. And then it hit you, the pint glass - when you leaned in to talk to Alex, he’d slipped something in the drink.

"Fu-cckk" You mumble, eyes incredibly droopy now.

You needed to get back to your flat, safety - yes.

But you didn't, as when you tried to move your legs they gave out from under you. This was an incredibly dangerous situation for anyone to be in, especially a young woman on the streets of Gotham. But the drugs worked quickly against your system, and before you had any time to prepare yourself for your inevitable demise, you blacked out

#roman x you #roman sionis smut #roman sionis fanfic #roman sionis x you #roman sionis x reader #roman sionis #roman sionis fanfiction #black mask fanfic #black mask fan fiction #black mask x reader #black mask #ewanfuckinmcgregor #ewanmcgregor #ewan mcgregor