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hitsmelikeasteamroller · 9 months

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Runaway Thoughts

Carmen Berzatto X Reader

Warnings: Smut, Language, Anxiety, Drinking, Slightly drunk sex

Word Count: 3,051

Summary: After a mishap in the kitchen, Carmen takes it upon himself to cheer you up.

A/N: This is my first Carmen fic and I hope everyone likes it bc I am definitely starved Carmen content lol. This is not proofread sorry not sorry <3

When your brother begged you to join him working at The Bear, you would have said no if you knew what it entailed. Richie pulled you into the job by calling me over and over, complaining about other candidates and how they “didn’t fix the napkin” whatever that means. You gave in, becoming a server for the restaurant, and managing front-of-house affairs, training the servers on anticipating customers’ needs and wants, and improving their overall experiences at The Bear. The tense atmosphere of the back of house staff doesn't often carry to the front of house workers, but when it rains, it pours.

Tonight was one of those nights. Focaccia courses were behind, pushing everything else back, and causing Carmen Berzatto to lose his shit behind the kitchen doors.

“Where the FUCK are the seven fishes for table 42?!” Carmen screams at Tina.

She attempts to explain that the last batch got undercooked, and she had to cook some of the ingredients a bit longer when Carmen cut her off, snapping “Just get it done, chef. Every second counts.”

Tensions have been high all night and only continue to rise as servers poke their heads in and out of the kitchen to ask where their missing dishes are. Nothing pisses the chefs off more than this.

The flames between the servers and the chefs are stoked with every backed up dish, and every question, a fact you are overwhelmingly aware of as the servers decide to come to you as a front-of-house manager. You’ve finally had enough of the complaints, and you stomp through the restaurant in search of Richie. He would know what to do, his gruff and snarky exterior being able to bridge the gap between front and back-of-house, with his sister in front and Carmen in the back. Unable to find him in the front, you push open the doors to the kitchen and begin to make your way to the back doors, behind which you assume Richie is standing smoking a cigarette. In your haste, you forget to yell ‘corner’ as you crash directly into one of the dishwashers, who just so happened to be holding a freshly clean stack of salad plates. You watch in slow-motion as part of the stack tips off the top, crashing and shattering on the kitchen tile.

“Oh my God, I-I’m so sorry, here let me go get the broom, I’ll-” you begin to panic, rambling on about cleaning the plates before you look up and meet the eyes of the person you crashed into. It’s one of the new guys, you haven’t talked to him before, making your mishap all the more embarrassing.

In the middle of your rambling he cuts you off.

“Are you too fucking stupid to say ‘corner’?!” He barks. “What the fuck is wrong with you?! Do you not know how a kitchen works?! Now we’re gonna be fucked over for the rest of the night because we’re short fifteen plates! And it’s your fucking fault.”

You apologize profusely again as you grab the broom and the dustpan, attempting to sweep what you can to avoid any risk. The man finally walks away as you sweep, muttering more about how he hates you and how you fucked the kitchen for the night. You go silent, retreating from your current situation into your head and thoughts. Are you stupid? You couldn’t solve the server’s problems without running to cry to your brother. You empty the dust pan into the trash. You’re awful at this job. You don’t deserve to work here. You smooth your shirt as you walk back to the front, not looking at any of the chefs you walk past. You’re an obstacle. You don’t help all you do is hurt. You tell a server to deal with their backed up tables by themself, continuing to walk past the rows of tables, to one you know is waiting on their food. Thoughts continue to plague you as you offer them all free glasses of wine as they wait. You wouldn’t have to give away free drinks if you could control the servers. You’re costing the restaurant money. You’re gonna fuck everyone over.

Your night continues like this, nitpicking yourself as you try to do your job, unable to fully be in the moment. A faraway look sits on your face as you complete your cutwork. You roll silverware in fabric napkins, placing the complete bundles into a crate for tomorrow as your thoughts haunt the back of your mind. Richie’s gonna be so fucking pissed. You roll another. Carmen’s gonna fire you. Another. The chefs all hate you now. You reach for another fork, and realize you’re out of clean silverware, signaling your ability to leave.

Checking your phone, you realize it’s much later than usual, you must be moving pretty slowly tonight. The kitchen getting backed up must’ve been your fault.

You arrive at your locker, swapping your non-slip work shoes for regular sneakers. You hear footsteps as you grab your bag.

“Oh good you’re still here. I need to talk to you.” It's Carmen. You’re fired. He hates you.

“I was actually just about to leave, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for what happened earlier too, I didn’t mean to knock into him, I understand if you don’t want me back, I totally fucked up the whole kitchen I’m so sorry.” your words escape you before you can think about what you want to say.

“No. No no no, you’re not fired (y/n). You’re like the most reliable one here. I just need to know what he said to you.” Carmen looks surprised that you would have thought he would ever fire you. “Plus I think Richie would kill me if I fired you so…” he laughs, trying to lighten the mood.

“Oh. Sorry. I just kind of assumed-” you trail off before you begin to tell Carmen the awful things the dishwasher said to you, not letting the tears that were welled in your eyes spill down your cheeks.

Carmen looks at you with an upset empathy in his blue eyes, he reaches forward to brush a stray tear from your cheek, then takes your hand in his as you finish telling him how the things the man said to you had echoed in the back of your head all night. ��I’m sorry, I know it shouldn’t affect me like it does, I should just move on, grow up.” You dryly laugh, attempting to brush your insecurities off as a joke.

“No, (y/n), I expect that from my chefs who have gone through culinary school. They have those words drilled into them for years and they learn to deal with that in a learning setting, not a professional kitchen like this. That is not in your job description and should not have happened, as the owner I can not apologize to you enough.”

Carmen’s words make you feel reassured and safe. You’ve never heard him speak like that in all of the years you’ve known him.

“It’s not your fault Carmy, I think- I think I just need to go home and sleep off the day.” you brush a strand of hair behind your ear as you bend to grab your bag again.

“Here let me call you an Uber, you don’t really seem to be in a place to deal with the L.” Carmy grabs for his phone, opening the app. “Where do you live?”

You tell him your address and he snaps his head to look at you

“Are you fucking with me?” he asks. You shake your head. “Oh my God you live like a block from me.” He laughs in surprise.

“Oh shit, are you leaving soon? We can just share the Uber to our shithole apartments.” You laugh back. It’s definitely not the nicest part of town but at least Carmy can share your pain.. You’re shocked Richie never mentioned that you live in the same area as Carmen, but Richie is kind of fucking stupid.

Carmy agrees to split the Uber, grabbing his things while you wait for the car to arrive.

As the two of you walk to the car, Carmen opens the door for you, allowing you to slide in before he takes his own seat and slams the door shut, briefly exchanging pleasantries with the driver. It’s a 20 minute drive through the traffic spent exchanging stories of Richie, remodeling The Bear, and finding line cooks doing drugs in the alley. As you pull up to Carmy’s building, he licks his lips nervously, and turns to look at you. “Hey uh, do you want to maybe come in for a drink? I can walk you to your building later if you want?”

“Only if you have tequila.” You respond. He laughs and you follow him out of the car to the doors of his building.

You sit on his couch with a drink in your hand. He sits beside you, picking up your earlier conversation.

“Richie was always an asshole but you were so nice and polite, I didn’t believe you were related when you first came to Christmas.” Carmen is leaned back against the couch, feet up on the coffee table. The arm holding his drink is propped up on the arm of the couch. He looks delicious. It’s then you remember to respond.

“I think I was on my best behavior because your family is terrifying.” You laugh. “Like is Cicero in the mafia or like what is the deal with that?”

Carmen’s face drops “Oh babe, we can’t talk about that.” His voice is hushed and your heart drops. You dumbass you fucked it up. Carmy's concerned look cracks into a smile.

“I’m fucking with you.” He laughs and you let out a sigh of relief.

“You’re awful.” you laugh in response, softly swatting his arm. It's then you realize how close together you are really sitting. You can smell him, hear him breathe. As he finishes laughing, he meets your eyes. It must be the alcohol talking when he says “You know I used to have the biggest crush on you, I was too scared to talk to you that first Christmas because of it.”

You’re taken aback. Fucking Carmen Berzatto just admitted that he had a CRUSH on you.

“No you’re fucking with me again.” You can’t believe him.

“No I promise you I’m not. I honestly don’t think it ever went away, and I probably shouldn't say that but I’m a little drunk right now and there’s a beautiful girl on my couch.”

You can’t say anything. Your cheeks heat up as you lean into him meeting your lips with his. As your lips meet you feel him sigh in contentment, he’s been waiting for this and so have you. Your lips move against each other heatedly as you intensify the kiss. You’re leaned over him so you can kiss him as he is leaned against the back of the couch. Your arm meets his side of the couch to prop yourself up across him and he breaks the kiss for a moment as his arm meets your lower back, encouraging you to set yourself on his lap. Your legs wrap around his waist as you continue to kiss, his tongue entering your mouth as his hand pushes itself under your shirt, rubbing your back. Your hands make their way to his head, you have one hand on his cheek, one tangled in his hair as he moans into the kiss. You feel his hardening cock underneath you as you sit on his lap and you trail a hand down his torso towards his hips.

You pull away from his lips as you whisper with a soft laugh “Carmy I think I owe you for the Uber.”

You take yourself off of his lap as he frees himself from his pants, his hard cock rests against his stomach as he lays back on the couch. You place yourself between his legs, taking him in your hand. You run your hang along him a couple times before taking him in your mouth.

“Oh my God that’s so fucking good babe, Oh my God.” Carmen moans as you move your head up and down.

He threads his hand into your hair as his head falls back looking towards the ceiling, consumed in the pleasure you are giving him.

He begins to rock his hips to meet your mouth, your hands run up and down his thighs as you continue to suck him off.

Suddenly he pulls you off his cock, keeping his hand in your hair as he pulls you to his lips, heatedly kissing you.

“Can I please fuck you, I need to be in you.” Carmen almost whines.

“Please.” is all you respond before he lays you down on the couch, pulling your shirt off and throwing it somewhere into the abyss of the living room. His kisses from your neck down to your stomach, unbuttoning your pants. Your pants come off next. They meet the same fate as your shirt, thrown to the side. Carmen continues to kiss along your hips, pulling your panties down. He slides two fingers through your heat as he leans back up to meet your mouth with his. “So wet babe. Is it all for me?” He knows the answer, he just wants to hear you say it yourself.

“Yes Carm, all for you.” you moan in response, giving him exactly what he wants.

“Oh babe.” He lines his cock up with your entrance, pushing in bit by bit to give you time to adjust. He kisses up your neck, right under your ear as he begins to thrust into you, causing you to gasp and wrap your hands around his back.

He moans as he fucks you, your hands running down his back. He feels your nails dig into his shoulders as he angles his hips up, hitting the perfect spot inside of you. Your head is thrown back, whimpers escaping your lips as he continues at that angle.

“Oh yeah that’s the spot isn’t it?” Carmy muses, confidence dripping from his statement as he watches your reaction to his actions. It's driving him crazy. He fucks you harder as he feels himself about to finish.

“Oh Babe, I’m gonna cum, you’re so good, so tight oh my God.” He is rambling as he fucks into you, trailing his hand down your front, stopping at your clit, rubbing small circles as he continues to fuck you hard and fast.

“Oh my God Carm please don’t stop that I’m gonna cum, oh fuck.”

“Fuck babe, cum with me, please, fuck.” Carmen continues his actions as your orgasm washes over you, causing you to tense as he pulls out and finishes onto your stomach. Moans fill the room as you ride out your orgasms. Carmen, still above you, leans his forehead against yours, breathing heavily. You tilt your chin up to meet his lips, capturing each other in a sweet, heavy kiss.

Finally Carmen stands to grab a towel and clean you off. He finds his boxers and pulls them back on as he walks away to throw the towel in the laundry. You wonder if you are going to sleep here, or complete the walk of shame back to your complex down the street. Your questions are answered when Carmy tosses one of his shirts to you, cocking his head in a ‘follow me’ signal towards his bedroom.

“Uh, there’s a shower in there if you want, you can sleep here with me, or I can walk you home. No pressure.” He kisses your temple and moves to his dresser to find a shirt.

You make your way to his bathroom to take a brief shower, still feeling a little gross from your shift earlier. Washing yourself with Carmen’s soap, you’re lost in thoughts about how you just fucked your boss and family friend, and it was fucking awesome. You dry yourself with a towel, putting the shirt Carmen gave you back on. He is sitting on the edge of the bed, writing something on his phone when you open the bathroom door. He sets his phone down to look at you. You sit next to him and lean your head on his shoulder.

“Hey.” is all he says.

“That was so good, Carmy.” you simply respond.

“Fuck yeah it was.” He softly laughs. You turn your head and meet him in a soft kiss. “Do you want to stay here tonight? I can make you breakfast in the morning.” He offers, speaking into your hair as you lean against him.

“Yeah, I think I’d love that.” you respond. You crawl into the bed, settling under the covers as he slides in next to you.

He pulls you to him as you wrap your arms around him. “We probably shouldn’t talk about this in front of people.” He says softly.

You breathe out a laugh as you think about what Richie would say if he found out about this. “Yeah, probably not. Just act normal.” you respond.

“Just act normal, huh?” he laughs. “Act like I didn’t just have the best sex of my life with you?” He teases.

“I don’t know, Richie and Sydney would love to hear every detail of this, I’m sure.” You counter playfully. He sighs as he begins to rub your back. You close your eyes as you are hit with a wave of exhaustion from the day, head growing heavier against Carmy’s chest. He kisses the top of your head, whispering a soft goodnight as he turns off the lamp, plunging the room into darkness.

...

After a delicious breakfast, Carmen walks you back to your building so you can get ready for your dinner shift. You smooth your shirt, trying to get rid of the wrinkles caused by it sitting in a heap on Carmy’s living room floor. Just act normal.

You walk into the restaurant, clocking in and walking past the chefs cleaning up lunch. You meet Carmy’s eye and hold back an awkward laugh. Sydney and Tina exchange a suspicious look and Carmen tells them to get back to work as he watches you pass through the kitchen doors to the front.

#carmen berzatto x reader #the bear x reader #the bear #richie jerimovich #carmy berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto #carmen berzatto smut #carmy berzatto smut

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theorphicangel · 1 year

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𝐰𝐢𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐦𝐞 | levi ackerman x reader |

tags: no warnings, fluff, established relationship, gn reader, suggestive end but not explicit.

This was probably the last place on earth Levi wanted to be.

And he didn’t hesitate in letting you know that this was his own personal version of hell.

Bright neon lights, way too many people hustling about in one area, loud, obnoxious screams from the fairground rides along with the mixed scent of sweet and sour beverages from a wide variety of stalls.

The large crowd of strangers, who clearly had no fucking idea what personal space was, swamped the festival.

All Levi wanted was a quiet Friday night in. You and him on a couch, you laying on his chest with his arms wrapped around you as you both watched a good old classic movie. Not being dragged to a fucking clown fest. Although he did warn that if any clowns did ever come up to him you agreed that the two of you would leave straight away.

You walked through the sea of people each in their own little bubbles, the scent of popcorn lingering around as you passed a group. You tightly held onto Levi’s hand, his fingers intertwined with yours as you dragged him through the crowd. Your eyes scanned over the different stalls each one as unique as the other with different games, foods and rides. Your eyes glew with flashing lights around you, a wide smile across your face at the scene.

The same couldn’t be said for Levi as he stumbled behind you, your ears picking up on every mutter of questioning of why he was in this crappy place and why there were so many people all here right now at this exact moment. Knowing that he was out of his comfort zone you quickly pulled away to a game stall away from the crowds that all gathered in the center of the ground.

The two of you stopped in front of a colorful stall, stereotypical funfair music blaring from the large speakers above, fairy lights along with neon lights flashing, tempting people with the sign ‘Have a go! Only two tokens!’

Your mouth opened in awe at the sight of multiple fluffy toys hung from the sides and above, all different sizes. Your eyes practically burst out of their sockets at the sight of one big brown bear that stood out from the rest.

“Look, that bear’s bigger than you!” you pointed above, failing to stifle your mouth from laughter.

He looked up and then turned to you with a deadpan face,“Oh fucking ha ha.”

You laughed, giggles erupting from your mouth, “I’ll even win it for you just to prove it.”

The last you hear is a “Fuck’s sake” before you disappear away to exchange your two tokens.

You reappear by Levi's side in no less than a minute and this time, instead of your two tokens you came back with three medium sized coconuts.

“What, you have to hit them all to win?” Levi said, his head motioning towards the tin cans stacked upon one another; three on the bottom, two in the middle and one on top.

You nodded, “Uh-huh.” you took your stance, in your winter coat and scarf, cheeks numb from the late December cold as warm vapor leaves your mouth.

Your tongue pokes out of your mouth as you throw your first shot. It didn’t aim where you expected it to but you managed to hit off the top can.

Taking your second shot you miss and pout in annoyance. You take your time with your last shot making sure that you're aiming exactly where you want it to end up.

To you, you were being precise and evaluating your chances.

To Levi, you looked stupid.

The last coconut leaves your hand and hits two cans in the second row, leaving three on the bottom.“Damn it.” you say as you lost your final chance, “What a rip off.”

Levi scoffs, “You were the one who gave your tokens away.”

You nudge him in the side with your elbow, “Yeah only because I really wanted that bear.” you say, looking up, “It would go great in the corner of my bedroom.”

“I thought you wanted to compare its size to me?” Levi asks, raising a brow at you.

“Yeah, that too of course.” you add on, huffing in defeat.

Levi lets out a sigh, this time a cloud of vapor expected form his mouth, “Gimme two tokens.”

“Why?” you ask dumbly.

He rolls his eyes, “So I can win it for you idiot.” he said, a hand outstretched in front of you. You give him two tokens without hesitation. He leaves but swiftly returns, faster than you did and with three identical coconuts in his hand.

You stand back watching, as Levi leans forward ever so slightly, raises his hand back and throws the coconut, hitting the middle with one shot. You smile widely as the clang of cans hit the ground.

He has two bottom cans left, one on the right, one on the left.

“Can you do it?” you say out loud, a mere ‘tch’ comes as your reply.

To some it may be seen as impossible and for sure they would’ve left empty handed, calling this whole thing a scam. But levi? No, he was going to make sure you both left with something, anything. Even if he has to spend his own money just getting you that fucking bear.

He throws again, aiming for the right side and successfully hits the can. You whoop in cheer beside him.

One more. One more fucking stupid can and he can go home with you, put a movie on and lay next to you all night long.

Levi fixates his aim on the left can now, wavering his hand in anticipation.

And he throws.

And of course he hits it.

The bell above digs as the stall owner declares a winner. You practically jump on him in astonishment, “You fucking did it!” you shout, placing a kiss on his cold cheek.

A small blush reaches his cheek, feeling the eyes of others at the stall fall on him.

He merely mumbles, “Of course I did.”

After asking what prize Levi would like, he merely points up at the big brown bear and fucking hell a kid with all the candy in the world couldn’t be any more happier than you.

You squeal with laughter as you squeeze the big brown bear in delight, “It’s so soft Levi! And look!” you raise the bear next to him, “I was wrong, it’s not bigger than you.”

“How unfortunate.” he replies in a dry tone.

The two of you stroll away from the stall letting others have their turn but you bet none of them would have as much luck as Levi did.

“Anything else you wanna see in this fucking shit fest?” he asked, silently hoping you were more than satisfied and ready to go home.

You look down at your watch, which looks fucking ridiculous as you’re grabbing the bear with two hands. It takes all of Levi not to laugh at the way you waddle, carrying the big stuffed toy across.

“Hmmm-I heard there was a clown show at six later on.”

Levi’s face drops.

“And the circus.” you add, tapping your lip before you look at him and almost burst at Levi’s expression. You wait for a second and watch as his frown deepens, a crease appearing between his brows.

“I’m kidding! Let’s go home! .” You giggle, walking toward him and linking your arm with his own.

“Never fucking do that again.” he mumbles, looking down with slight embarrassment that he fell for your stupid prank.

“m’sorry, I’m sorry, I will never do that again.” you promise as the two of you leave behind the crowd and head towards the car park. The obnoxious screams and crowds of people slowly fade into the background.

“Good because I was about to take that bear for myself and cuddle with that tonight.”

“Without me?”

“Definitely without you.”

You feign a gasp, clutching your chest, “You never.”

“I will if you don’t hurry your ass up so we can get home and you can join in…maybe.”

“Maybe?”

“Maybe.” This time his lips twitched into a smile as he leaned towards your ear, “ I need to decide a way to make you pay back for that, sweetheart.” he whispered.

taglist: @notgoodforlife @youre-ackermine @lovolee3 @the-milk-anon @evas-leslas, @imkumichan @levi-supreme , @leviismybby @bejewelledd @searriously @luvjiro @secretmoneybearvoid @idkks4m

to join the taglist click here !

#angel writes #levi ackerman #levi ackerman x reader #levi attack on titan #levi x reader #levi x you #aot x reader #attack on titan

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usagichuu · 10 months

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university!dan heng x reader oneshot

a/n: a continuation of the university!dan heng headcanons! it’s been a while since ive properly written so please bear w me, not proofread so also plz bear w me

genre: sfw, first kiss, gn reader

notes: i actually do a lot of archival research in uni irl and hence this scenario has crossed my mind many times but for context for those who haven’t been around uni libraries before: to maximize space many libraries will have their shelves packed together in one huge block of shelves, so you can’t actually access the shelves by walking between them. in order for you to access the shelf you’re looking for you need to turn a wheel on the corresponding shelf to push the adjacent shelves aside and open up a pathway for you to walk between the shelves (does this even make any sense?). but you need to be careful! because if you aren’t paying attention, someone in another row may be trying to get a book and when you open up yours you might squish them :( anyways! context so this makes sense.

It’d been a few weeks into the semester since you first met him at the library, since those steely gray eyes that peered over at you from the front desk seemed to puncture right through your defences. It’s funny how one day of forgetting your laptop charger could turn into a new daily routine of dropping by the library, requesting to rent one just so you could be struck again. Charger rentals quickly turned to him asking you about the books you’re reading to chats about classes. Then one day he started leaving you cups of tea on your desk for your late night sessions - and always when you have your head down for a power nap so you can’t ever thank him. But the teabag in your cups are always the same brand as the ones you see dangling from his thermos, though he will always deny it.

Today you actually did need his help, though. You were looking for a specific book that was not in the regular library shelves, and needed someone to guide you through the labyrinth that was the archives. Luckily for you, Dan Heng seemed to know them like the back of his hand.

“Sorry to take you away from your job like this.”

“I work at the library help desk. You are asking for my help,” he says matter-of-factly, “This is quite literally my job.”

The archive stacks lay out before the two of you, with stacks on stacks of shelves stretched out for what must be all the way from East to West campus. With the archives located in the library’s underground level, it was entirely plausible. The archives room was lit by large fluorescent panels on the ceilings, which seemed to hang low compared to the tall shelves. It was crazy how in a room that loomed this large, they still had to stack the shelves together to accommodate all of them. Each shelf had a great big wheel on its side, which you knew you had to turn to roll the adjacent shelves aside, allowing you passage to the shelf of your choice. With the smell of finely aging books curling yellow with the years wafting through the room and these great big contraptions of shelves, being down here almost felt otherworldly. You looked to Dan Heng - how long must someone spend down here to sift through the shelf labels as algorithmically as he did?

“May I?” Snapping out of your awe, you found him holding his hand out to you, expectantly. Wait - what?

“Huh?”

“Your phone. I forgot the call number.”

Oh. You hand your phone over. This deep into the archives, with the fortress of shelf stacks in front and behind you, the ceiling lights could only reach so far. So when he opened your phone, the light of the screen gently illuminated his face.

“Interesting background.”

“Don’t you have a job to do?”

“Friendly banter is an effective way to make a friendly atmosphere between library staff and visitors.

“I didn’t take you for the bantering type.”

Just before you swear you could detect an almost imperceptible smile. But just as quickly as it came, the light of your phone was snuffed out.

“Here it is,” he set both hands firmly on the wheel, turning and rolling what must have been eight stacks of shelves aside, which gave way with a creak and the crackle of plastic-wrapped books. A space opened up between your two target shelves, just wide enough for one of you at a time to pass through.

“Looks cozy,” you say, taking a step inside. But you knew this was the farthest right he could push the shelves, and you didn’t want to trouble him to push aside any more. “Let’s go find that book.”

You two work silently, scanning the bookshelves row by row: you on one side and him on the other, meeting in the middle. You would be lying if you said you didn’t feel a little flustered when you two bumped shoulders as you finished the first row, him just silently turning to you, shaking his head. It’s not on this one. And then you two proceeded to the next row.

You went on like this for a little bit, occasionally accidentally brushing hands as you two closely watched the book spines, only for you to hurriedly draw your hand away. But row by row, shelf by shelf, he started to move his hand to yours first, your hands lingering, skin to skin, for just a moment as you both pretended to be carefully observing the last book. Never daring to look the other in the eye lest either one betrays the look on their face. First a brush of the knuckles, them the backs of your fingers, then-

The shelves began to close together with a heavy groan. They must have been so quiet, else must not have realized you two were there, and began to close up the stacks, and they were closing in quickly.

Dan Heng immediately put himself between you and the incoming shelf, bracing himself on the shelf behind you. “Excuse me!” He shouts to the stranger, and the shelves ceased.

The stranger called back. “Sorry! I’ll be done in a sec!”

The momentary shock settling down, you realized the position you were in: the two of you, pressed dangerously close together, Dan Heng with one arm above you to steady himself on the shelf behind you, looking down at you. Your faces were so close as you turned your head up to look at him, you felt a lock of his hair brush your forehead.

“Are you alright?”

You open your mouth to say something, when you realize that with his body pressed to yours he could feel your heart beating wildly in your chest - and was that his thrumming in response? Must the adrenaline from saving you from the shelves be getting him this worked up? Why was your own heart still fluttering if the threat is over? And… Why did your face feel so warm?

“I’m…” You look into his eyes for the first time since you two entered the shelves - he’s handsome. Devastatingly handsome. The faint ceiling lights cut through the shelves, offering a window of light for you to look at him, him to look at you.

“Sorry… Is this too close?”

You shake your head. “No, it’s… It’s fine…”

Your eyes wandered - could he see where they were looking? Down his face to his lips, and you tried to focus on something - anything - to distract you but all that was before you was him, his eyes gray like winter above you, his heart thumping through his jacket and against your chest, and his lips, god, his lips.

You two stand in silence as you try to peel your eyes away from him. But then he gently puts his free hand under your chin, tipping it back up to look at him. You can’t hide it now - you cheeks flushed pink, the way you’re looking at him. Your foreheads are touching now, his eyes searching yours as his gentle breath fans across your face, a few locks of hair on your cheek stirring. You quietly whisper.

“Is teasing me also part of your job description?”

A flutter of his eyelashes. Yours closing in response. Your hearts, drumming up courage in you both as he lowers his face and you bring yours up to meet his.

And then the gentlest, gentlest of kisses. Your arms wrap around his neck, pulling him closer, and his hand under your chin drops to your waist in response, drawing you near. His kisses are long and drawn out, then punctuated: short, sweet like haiku syllables, playing out on your lips, writing you to life.

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.

a/n: thanks for reading yahoo!

writing masterlist

#hoyoverse #honkai star rail #dan heng #hsr #honkai star rail x reader #hsr headcanons #hsr x reader #honkai star rail fanfic #honkai star rail fanfiction #mine

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ang3lv3rm1n · 12 days

Text

I know it probably isn't an odd thing per se, but something that I just connected the dots on was the correlation between me getting to fly on a plane and me realizing I'm a therian or other-kin or alter-human. But I didn't really know what the feeling was then. It was this...almost overwhelming feeling of peace and serenity and belonging. Like I was meant to be in the sky, soaring through the clouds. It was such a strong feeling that I wrote a note down on a phone I don't have anymore about how I never wanted to land. I'll continue with more details below the cut, I don't want to take up anyone's dash.

When this happened, was December 2020, I had been experiencing an awful lot of mental health crises and I was flying alone as my first time ever on a plane. I was 15 years old, I had teal hair and stupid looking chunky black glasses. I was tired because I had woken up so early, normally airports are kinda scary but at the time, the closest airport to me was incredibly small. The airport in Cody Wyoming. There weren't very many other people getting on the tiny plane with me, I do remember two of the people being a grandmother and her gran-daughter who was maybe 11? They were both sleepy as well. I think I only remember them because the grandma complimented my mask. It was a grayish periwinkle sort of color and had white silhouettes of bears as the pattern. My mom had gotten it for me earlier in the year from the local pharmacy where one of the employees liked to sew in her spare time and had been making masks with different patterns on them. I felt lonely, being the only one of my family going on the flight because my mom and dad had to work and my Nana was paying for my ticket so I could come see her back in Mississippi for the holiday.

Once the plane arrived, and I had boarded, the sun still hadn't come up yet, and I thought I would just sleep on the plane ride because I anticipated being anxious the entire time. It was the kind of flight where you get on in one place, land in another, and get on another plane, and repeat until you get to your destination. I forget what it's called, but anyways, I got the row all to myself because there were so few people even on the small plane. And after the pre-flight introduction to plane safety and all of that, I was still worried about how I would feel once the plane was off the ground. That was until we actually were flying, and then suddenly the feeling I described earlier hit me. If I remember correctly, I cried a little bit because of how overwhelmingly at peace and how happy I felt. It was something I don't think I had ever felt before, and If I had, I hadn't felt it in a very long time.

I miss it alot. Even running through the airports and sitting around waiting, It was strangely comforting to me. I wish I had the money to fly everywhere, If I had the chance I would just to be in the sky again. To get to see the sunrise perched in the clouds where I'm meant to be.

#Therian #Otherkin #Alterhuman #ang3lv3rm1n #Dragonkin #Wingkin #angelkin #plane #long post #dragon therian #moments in my life #I hope I get to fly again someday #It would be wonderful

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set-phasers-to-whump · 7 months

Text

maybe

prompt: animal trap

whumpee: eddie diaz

fandom: 911

hi! here's the first of three eddie fics in a row, which i have just realized i wrote as i'm typing this. get ready for a barrage of me beating up my favorite (fictional) firefighter :)

Eddie doesn’t like this place.

It’s an old house, half-collapsed and completely abandoned, sitting in the middle of a large, yellowed yard that is filled with various pieces of debris - old car parts, scrap metal, and the like.

It is also on fire. So far, the flames have not engulfed the entire place, but it’s a matter of minutes. And then, there’s all the dry grass, and beyond that, trees.

He’s in front, pulling the hose towards the house, trudging through the overgrown grass and kicking aside the occasional gas canister or piece of rotted timber.

He doesn’t even see it, it’s buried so deep in the grass, likely having laid there untouched for at least a decade.

He doesn’t know what’s happened, at first, and thinks he’s just twisted his ankle. He stops walking and looks down, and then the pain hits him at full force.

There is a bear trap, rusted but very much functional, clamped onto his foot. Its teeth have punched right through his boot and into his flesh, and it fucking hurts.

He sort of sinks to the ground with a strangled yelp, his right leg stuck out from his body at a strange angle in an attempt not to jostle it.

“Hey, guys?” he calls to his team, who are already hurrying towards him. “I might need a little help over here.”

Hen gets to him first.

“Is that a bear trap?”

He nods and then sucks in a sharp breath as her fingers touch the trap embedded in his foot.

“Jesus,” is Chimney’s contribution. “Who puts a bear trap in their front yard?”

Bobby and Buck hurry past them, picking up the hose Eddie’d dropped as a loud popping sound reminds him that there’s still a fire to be fought.

He focuses on watching the flames and watching Bobby and Buck attack the fire from the outside. Hen and Chim are stabilizing his foot, and it hurts. Every slight movement sends a wave of pain up his entire leg.

He watches Bobby and Buck enter the building, and doesn’t look away until they’re back, the house behind them smoking but no longer aflame.

By the time Bobby and Buck return to them, Hen and Chim have gotten Eddie onto a backboard, prepped for transport in the ambulance they had not expected to be making use of on this particular call.

They get situated in the ambulance, and Eddie reluctantly allows Chim to give him a small amount of morphine. Every second that goes by makes his foot hurt worse. He can feel it throbbing in time with his heartbeat, which is already too fast.

He wants the damn thing off of him, although he knows that they can’t remove it now without potentially causing more damage. But he can feel the teeth digging into his skin and it’s awful and he wants them out.

Chim notices his discomfort, places a hand on his shoulder.

“We’ll get this thing off you in no time,” he says. “How you holding up?”

Eddie shrugs. “Been better, been worse,” he replies, trying to keep his voice even. Fuck, this hurts.

“It’s only a few more minutes. Sure I can’t talk you into a little more of the good stuff? It’ll help, you know. There’s no point in making yourself suffer. It’s only us here.”

“Fine,” Eddie relents, because it does really hurt, “but only a little.”

Chim pumps his fist like he’s just won a prize, and injects a small amount more of morphine into Eddie’s IV bag.

It helps, of course. The pain recedes in his mind, just a little bit, but enough to make a difference.

“What did I tell you?” Chim asks. “We carry this stuff for a reason.”

Eddie raises his hand in mock surrender. Chimney has a point, though Eddie isn’t sure that he wants to admit it. But what’s the point in suffering needlessly? In not accepting something that can ease the pain?

“Maybe you’re right,” he admits.

Maybe there is nothing to be lost from accepting help. Maybe there is nothing to be lost from admitting to pain.

Maybe.

thanks for reading! hope you liked it, love youuuu <3

#whumptober2023 #no.11 #animal trap #911 #fic #eddie diaz #bear trap #medical #my writing #i say things #no good way to tag this i think...#love weird injuries for the pain hate them for organizational purposes

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yutasbimil · 8 months

Text

Anomaly

vyn x fem!oc | tears of themis ff. (psychology major!lead) ✦ (3/~) [series fic] !!! also posted on my ao3 acc! { here } tags: angst, fluff, hurt/comfort cw: heavy on the (self) angst; mental anguish; mentions of anxiety and depression // smut is moved again, oops + supposedly this is a 'x reader' fic but got too heavy eventually, I apologize truly ;; word count: 3.5k

part 1 | part 2 | part 4 | part 5 | part x

do not repost © yutasbimil (2023)

cont.

With all that she's going through right now, Yule knows this is beyond 'normal' or expected of a person. Also, with her views and treatment towards herself, she ought to know that her state turned brittle with little to no regard she feels towards greatness.

She deserves more. But she can't quite get there yet to love herself again. No wonder she feels disquieted, she's her own immense pressure crushing her.

She's not able to breathe freely since.

It has been the third night in a row she's struck awake so suddenly.

It's as if hairs are directly plucked out of her skin all at once, the exchange still lingers on her mind. But his “nice” treatment irked her the most. She’s not used to being attended to, nor brought any interest– his level of keen engulf-ness towards her was unsettling.

No one ever looked at me like that with such focus or care.

But she likes it.

To be frank, she’s scared. Like, is she able to handle this?

For most of her life, her belief is that she’s too much of a mess to keep her relationships intact. That’s what her mother always says. That’s her warning. It’s too painful. All men are pricks. She wouldn’t even be able to maintain responsibilities as she’s helpless as fuck. And it’s always her who has a hell of a personality.

Although, as “awful” as she absolutely is, she’s expected to be a ‘good girl’.

She feels disoriented, she’s neglected most of her time. You shouldn’t do this. You shouldn’t be like that– She’s been warned and reprimanded when she’s showing behavior that dismays them, but they’re showing and doing said ‘bad actions’ as well?

She’s confused.

Yule felt her throat dry, itching for some hydration. The sign of pools of sweat alarmed her to wash off her night terrors.

Her mess of hair reflects what she's going through internally.

Yule recently just moved to Stellis.

She’s not used to the silence of the space. The neat array of items also makes her more disoriented. She’s used to chaos.

Although now, she’s breathing more properly as she’s not much strangled by the shackles of her household. However, she wasn’t ready for the gravity of how it was heavier and bringing her down this much.

The burden of not living on the same roof anymore, makes her feel more lost and disarray.

Its effects remain consistent and persistent.

The sound of the door ringing signaled her senses awake back to reality. A package that she would take in a bit. Her mind shifts again. Add more as her eyes crossed the envelope mocking her line of sight at the kitchen table. Her results just came from her previous clinic, and she requested a physical copy of the psychological assessment. (In case she goes berserk, she can quickly burn them). It seems expected that the words bear weight, despite her previous assumption.

She’s diagnosed with BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder).

“Figures,” she whispered as if with contempt.

She almost tossed the contents back to her desk to make space for her preparing breakfast despite her lack of appetite.

Also with last time, she's pushing people away as much as she's growing attached. She’s quick to erase people off her life at one slip up, or more on directing the blame onto herself when she fucks up. Even almost turning down every opportunity that comes her way now that she's living independently.

What's wrong with me?

At least now the answer slowly unfolds itself to her up front.

Nevertheless, it's still quite difficult to swallow, it’s quicker to swallow her whole first than her comprehending any of this.

She’s late on their appointment, or to say their ‘date’. Yule still can’t seem to accept they’re dating, although starting it slow.

“I'm sorry, Dr. Ritcher.” she huffs, and then sits in her usual space in the tranquil garden of Vyn’s house. She drifts back to her thoughts of this morning, throat dry making it all harder to sink into her system the fact she has a disorder. No amount of water can quench the desert of her discovery.

This should be an easy step after knowing.

Her case is mild so to say, she’s fine on the fact she’s still keeping her close relationships intact as other cases have it worse.

Like her case, it's a good thing, by the looks of it, and she's managing.

But it can't erase the fact that she's having a difficult time.

Yule just gawks, staring into space and Vyn had noticed her presence elsewhere for the last minute.

“You're okay?” Vyn’s low voice snaps her out of her dissociating state. “You haven't touched much of the sponge cake I made.”

Was it served too sweet? Vyn ponders as he retastes his portion.

“It's exquisite actually.” Yule is nimble to regain her ‘usual’ persona, it seems convincing as her avoidance was unnoticed. The cream on her face stole the spotlight.

“You've got cream by your—”

“Oh, I'll get it,” she’s quick to beat Vyn ahead to wipe it off, blushing as Vyn chuckles at her timidness.

She took this chance to ask him, blurting out the thoughts that have been occupying her.

“What would you do if your loved one got diagnosed with a mental disorder?”

“As if they have any other choice as well?” Vyn voiced, concern visible in his tone.

She flushed.

Right, it's his job.

“It's just… what if they did you wrong and is a horrible person, would you leave them?” Yule conceded. It sounded all concluded and sorted out, with no means of being refuted.

Vyn had to look at her directly to check on her expression. It was troubled.

“Not everything is black and white.” Vyn prompts, though, he pauses to articulate his thoughts more. His tone sounded a tad bit reprimanding. “That depends on the whole picture for me to properly assess and answer your question, dear.”

That’s another way to put it.

Yule is so used to thinking of people as ‘absolute’; good and bad. And that of course leads to a disastrous way of thinking.

Though, this was only as of recently. She ponders more.

On Vyn’s end, he tries to objectively view her behavior just now. By the looks of it, it is also safe to convey his view and what he ought to respond to in these instances.

It should be pointed out that people can make mistakes and not everything could be perfect. Not everything could be easily tossed away just because it has some shortcomings. Falling short does not equate to inadequacy. One can have lapses of discrepancies and surges of outbursts. But that does not make them a completely horrible person.

She could only explain it at a surface level for now though.

“I thought at first, it's "mere" Impostor Syndrome when the underlying problems stem from something greater, also this may be the price of being a ‘perfectionist’.” She manages to vent out, her body language helps her express her distress.

Vyn unconsciously mirrors the state she is in momentarily.

“I'll say the same thing for myself as I oftentimes still have left judgment in that regard.” Vyn implored, intriguing the person he was conversing to to further elaborate.

He seems so well put together, with no neurosis, whatsoever. A sound-minded person, unlike me–

Yule still can’t comprehend such displays of tolerance. “Why so?”

“Of course, if I happen to care for them, I'll try to stay by them and understand their complexities to the best of my ability,” he responds, though the slump in his shoulders broads beyond what he’s trying to convey at the moment. “If it was a year ago, I'd say it differently…”

Yule finds it familiar, as if déjà vu.

“Rosa said the same thing, are those her words?” She waits momentarily for him to nod before she speaks again. “Working in the legal field does open you a lot.”

“I don't think that's the case.” Vyn postulated, his fingers meeting his lips as he spoke. “It's how we're raised as well that gave us this factor…”

“Hmmm…?”

It was more thought out loud, but it’s also out of character for him to utter out unconsciously. A Freudian slip.

“Nothing.”

The hesitance was evident minutes ago. As if they’re tiptoeing on what’s supposed to be laid out for the moment, but they’re sure they’re not ready to open up the shadows and etches of the past just yet.

But the tone they deliver gave them a glimpse of both their past. They may be a bit similar in that aspect.

“Is anything wrong, Yule?” Vyn tries to stir back on their supposed route of conversation. Yule heaves in a breath, as in fact, there are many things wrong in her head at this very instance. She just picks honesty to guide her through this.

“Do you happen to know anyone?” She starts out slow with her speaking. “Or residing here at Stellis where… I could get treatment?”

Vyn’s eyes are dilated for a moment before turning distant to think.

“Why can't you choose me though?” Vyn blunts.

“We… we know each other, Vyn,” Yule responds, stating the obvious, but also the fright it gives on violating such ethics in the field.

“Right…” Vyn replies dryly, as if already expecting a response from his intended error. It was indeed bad humor. Though, it isn't like him to let a detail like that slip off his mind.

“And…”

“And?” Vyn’s eyebrow perked up at her.

“It's against the ethics and protocols if you know, or happen to be falling for your psychiatrist— Horney?”

“Pardon?” Vyn blinks, (he heard it differently), unsure as he turns to her again for confirmation. “Hmmm?”

“Uhm no, I don't want the same case with her and Fromm.” Yule clarifies, it then clicked a familiar content atop Vyn’s head.

Before he could add anything else, Yule cuts short his curiosity and advances to ever create a teasing atmosphere.

“Do not give any mind to what I am saying, Dr. Richter.” she ends the topic there.

Vyn just chuckles, he just picks to put a different cake on her plate, smiling. “Okay, focus back on eating. Find another time to compose yourself. By then you can give me the needed documents sometime soon so I can easily refer you.”

Yule sighs, finally able to feel the sweetness of the cake he baked seep over her. “Thank you so much, Vyn.”

"There’s just some distinct smell in hotels I can easily tell." Yule pauses as her eyes darkened scanning through the area. The apparent smell of the casino is filled with smoke in the air. It still tingles her nose as they pass by.

The smell of mixed lemon and ginger filled her senses, it made her itch to the skin.

She and her family almost always check in her teenage years, more on their background and her privileged godmother who almost always seemed to have an extra room to spare for them to stay in distinguished hotels.

And all that went down the drain, the same as the crap-ton of bile that used to be in her system. Depression almost always kills her mood at that time along with the mundane, shallow atmosphere. This is all at naught.

All is not worth it with the cold feet and sleepless nights as she's not comfortable sleeping that's not her own bed.

“You’re quite accustomed to it?” Marius asks, turning her back into reality.

“More on familiarized enough…” she heavily sighs, the exorbitant glamour of the displays almost blinds her, even grazing over it feels burning to the touch. All this, she’s willing to give up for peace of mind.

Or at least she already let go of the moment she moved here at Stellis.

Though, of course, the past can still creep in ways unexpected. Its traces cannot be easily removed, much like a trailblazer, and it can consume one’s senses, going through your memories uninvited. It rummages unwanted thoughts.

It reminded her of the time she spent being hung up on a person. It was truly a dark time for her back then.

The topic shifted as they changed selections on branded bags. Yule merely drifts off with her story. “And now he’s famous, too far for my reach…”

Of course, Marius being Marius, he’s getting cocky.

"Maybe I can contact them?" he starts. Even going along patting his pants pocket for his phone as an easy access.

She snickered at the taller male. "You're only saying that to ease me." She moves through another display of leather belts, her eyes shifted to an array of colored ties, the hues reminded her of her bleak past. "He doesn't even know me to begin with." Her tone was as muted as the peacock blue accents of the tie.

I didn’t let myself known to him, thinking highly of him as out of my league.

"Is this different from the previous one you mentioned to me in class?" Marius confirms, eyes elsewhere on the male accessories, he’s looking for a more… lighter, more appealing blush sheen to be given as a gift.

Yule hums, following along in his stead. "Yes. Again, it's not worth it as they don't even know me." she clarifies, emphasizing for him to no longer bring too much effort into talking about this matter.

"So? You don’t know the power of von Hagens…"

"Bro, I do know but I won’t abuse it… besides that was years ago…" Yule brushes off his offer once again, her voice fades the same as the faded colors they’re looking at, a wide variation of bags.

“And the one I mentioned back then… She now has someone, she’s… " Yule looks at the baby shoes in the aisle across theirs. The immense pressure kicks in on the present day, of milestones or supposed achievements in her age.

‘I’m unemployed, didn’t even bother taking boards, just starting my master's studies, now as alone as the big whale in the vast ocean.

I feel I could be eaten alive by the harsh reality anytime.’

Yule swallows as it stacked more and more on her seemingly empty list in her head.

She redirects her focus, now eyes locked gazing at a Coach bag, comparing it to the mint with hints of yellow accents… Yule feels a tinge of guilt, reminded of someone.

But she feels blown away by the presence near her, she further sees the gap between them.

“Stop moping around and I’ll get that for you.” Marius notices her empty glances, he is quick to swift his hands to gesture to the sales clerk.

Before she could refuse, he already called the lady.

Yule glared, hissing sharply, almost in a whisper. Attempting to hide her flared cheeks behind her hand, she leans into the navy blue-haired man. “Marius von Hagen, don't you dare!”

This doesn’t even reach half of her paycheck tuition to grad school!— Yule torments over the flashy price tag.

“You and Rosa really are friends, come on don’t be shy.” Marius doesn’t have a hint of remorse in his cheeky face, it’s as rosy as the thought of the Rose he had in mind.

“How easy for you to say that with a straight face to an ordinary person like me?” Yule rolls her eyes, mocking as if on the verge to faint (she will if she were to pay this here and now).

Marius brushes his fingernails, riding along her humor. “What can you do? You’re friends with a celebrity.”

“I’m constantly reminded, thanks.” So smug, so full of himself but she can’t help but be bashful keeping her mouth shut.

Yule holds back her timidness. She could only sigh in defeat. “Make sure to contact me if you need anything, not that your connections aren't as sparse and vast already…”

“I’ll just need help with Rosa,” he says, diverted with his focus as he found a bag he had in mind. As if on cue, he lifted a rose-embroidered bag.

“Oh wow, it’s as if you aren’t making progress already in sweeping her off her feet.”

Marius looked at Yule, shocked as if any reciprocal interest wasn’t shown to him. But her wide-eyed expression is more on slipping a vital secret. She’s still left mouth agape, to herself like: Gurl, oh shit! She might’ve said something she shouldn’t.

“That is valuable information— important for you to keep it a secret,” she gestures a zip your mouth at him, distancing herself now. She could only cling to her life, as seen clearly by how she’s clinging too much to the bag.

“Also, she kept that picture you did of her in her room?” No, not another slip-up— she continues salvaging the conversation. “Maybe a painted customized bag instead. I think that is what she’ll appreciate a ton loads especially how “every brush stroke is filled with your feelings” or whatever you artists try to encapsulate…” Yule brushes it off casually, ‘barely satisfactorily successful’ if she may add. But her mind is then weighted by something else seeing her reflection.

Man, the gap suddenly pressured her. Rich ass money.

As much as she’s trying her best, knowing they’re at a similar age, she's older than him even (same age as Rosa), yet he has a lot achieved already, considering he’s talented af outside of his responsibilities.

Yule stops herself there from further spiraling, breathing in, she pulls herself together.

No, it disregards his effort, and his background on how separate that is.

Now she has too much freedom thinking all of this now independent and alone, far from her hometown and family. From everything else holding her back.

It is peaceful in comparison.

The comfort of daily life, and considering she also cut her connections… to nothing.

But at what cost? Crap, her pride is even eating her up to ask for help in finding a job. Again, even the connections all got cut. All her damn resources. Nothing.

Alas, one cannot eat pride.

She can at least bite her tongue not to spur sarcasm at this dude. Riches and all, he's still as normal of a guy, annoying even.

Yule could only swallow further with her much-held pride with the next words that came off his mouth.

"Vincent just informed me. Wait tomorrow morning or so, you'd have a call interview coming up." Marius stated, quickly putting back his phone in his pocket. She’s been trailing off for the last minute, they’re already walking out of the shop.

As if at cue, Yule's phone buzzed, indicating an email of the job offer. She has been waiting for a vacancy at any of the von Hagen's businesses. And as much as it was a joke, she knew he's got too much on his plate to even accommodate her, let alone give her a favor in the likes of her. She can't believe he even remembered that minor mention of her job hunting.

So it was a genuine reaction, eyes popping out of surprise as she almost tackled him in gratitude.

"You’re a lifesaver, Sir von Hagen." Yule tries to suppress her mirth. She handshakes firmly instead. She almost hugged him out of glee but it isn't appropriate out in the public eye. She repeatedly bows as Marius shakes his head with a feeble smile.

This means a lot to her, especially as she's starting from scratch.

She’s fucking glad she made friends with his dude. But more on witnessing the push and pull with Rosa, they’re as amusing as watching a Korean drama. Yule keeps a giggle to herself.

"Oh, come on, don’t treat me like I’m a saint." Marius brows perk at the title, waving his hands side to side. "And Vincent took great care of background checking you, I think you've got lots to offer me instead."

"Of course, none of that would slip by you, huh?" She kept a small smile to herself. Her family is known in the business industry, and although not like any of the top-rated ones, it sells well.

Marius gave her a keen look before settling into a nod. Best not to question her further.

"If ever you don't pass, I'll have a list of openings that are hiring, I'm sure one of them would best fit you. Though, HR Assistant best suits you, hmmm?"

Saying as if he's sure she doesn't need to although, just in case. She appreciates his helpfulness, she won't take any of it for granted.

"I wouldn't even face you if I failed any of this, Marius."

"So you better not." He even shots her an encouraging grin.

Finally, none of his overconfidence.

Though, she takes it as a compliment and warmth in her chest as he's able to be this cheeky around her. They both know they've had enough of the CEO mask crap he's putting up 24/7. It might be a similar and close age, but at the end of the day, Yule sees where Rosa is coming from. Marius is Marius.

※ my masterlist | #enjeiwrites ※

#vyn richter #mo yi #tears of themis #tot #vyn x reader #vyn: paradox series #enjeiwrites

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by-soleil · 2 years

Text

good person

Pairing: Lee Haechan x Female Reader

Word Count: 1k+

Genre: more angst😔

Warning: One-sided love (from both sides lmao), Oblivious bestfriend(s), like seriously wake up you two.

This fic was inspired by "Good Person - Lee Haechan"

a part two of this fic >>> "if we were a movie"

•••

You exhale loudly as your shoulder rolls forward. Completely ignoring the constant warning thrown at you about the importance of having a good posture by your mom.

Another date ends with you excusing yourself, can’t bear the pain throbbing in your chest any longer. The pain of knowing that the person sitting across from you at the dinner table is some random guy you said yes to and not Haechan.

You like Haechan—no you love Haechan. A feeling that you didn’t realize was even there. Having start with a sweet innocent friendship since grade school that developed into a strong bond over the years. Hence why now the both of you have each other’s number listed as emergency contact.

You used to believe that the story between you and Haechan would end up with the both of you yielding and finally come clean about the feelings the both of you have been harboring for each other. Just like what you saw in movies.

But after years sitting front row on every shenanigans Haechan indulged himself in with girls upon girls, you realized that not every movie has a happy ending.

“Hello?” Haechan’s sleepy voice answered your call, making you glance at the watch circling your wrist. 11:23 P.M. Great.

“Were you sleeping? Shit, I’m so sorry.” you apologize, feeling bad for waking Haechan up for some ridiculous favor. Not that he would mind, he never minds when it comes to you.

Haechan lets out a chuckle, a heavenly sound you wish you could drown yourself into every night. “I’m awake now.” Haechan’s voice suddenly turns after hearing the vague traffic noises in the background. “Where are you?” he preses.

“Downtown… Just had a bad date,” you lie. The date wasn’t bad and the guy you were on a date with was a total sweetheart. It was the realization that it will never be Haechan sitting across from you, holding your hand sweetly that ruin the night. It was you who ruin the night.

“Don’t go anywhere, stay somewhere crowded and send me your location.” Haechan semi-shout, you can hear him fiddling with the blanket looking for his keys before the phone call ended.

This is the problem. You don’t know what is it with Haechan, you never do. Is he doing all these for the sake of being a good friend? Or is there something more? Oh, you fucking wish there is.

•••

Haechan’s body goes rigid the second he spots you sitting on the sidewalk with your head buried to your chest. A mix of emotions coursing through his veins, making him gritting his teeth.

“Hey, are you okay?” Haechan’s warm finger squeezes your shoulder before taking off his jacket and draping it over your freezing frame.

Haechan would never say it out loud, but he wishes you would just stop agreeing to every date offer coming your way.

“Were you crying? Did that jerk said something awful to you?” Did he break your heart? Haechan continue asking but left the last question unsaid.

You shake your head weakly. Afraid you might shed more tears with the sight of Haechan looking mad worry over your well-being.

“Will you tell me what’s wrong this time? Cause I can’t stand looking at you being this sad over a date.” Haechan pleas, one of his hand fly to your back and start moving in soothing circular motion. Meanwhile his other hand pushing the warm chamomile tea he ordered earlier to your hands.

“Thank you, Haechan. You are such a good person.” you finally speak.

And with those words, Haechan’s first smile for the night appears.

•••

“You two should date. Wait, why aren’t you guys dating?” Jeno nonchalantly ask as he munch on his nth bag of jellies.

A round of hums was heard a second after, agreeing with Jeno.

“Definitely, you guys are always together anyway. I really thought you guys were a couple at first.” Renjun adds, pulling a nervous laughter from you.

A laugh that would haunt Haechan’s mind as he stay up all night, smiling, staring at the ceiling. Wondering what it would actually be like if you guys were a couple. Overwhelmed with happiness with just that thought alone.

Haechan is a popular guy. He’s no mean a popular athlete, nor he is a mega rich brat that throws the best parties. He’s popular because he’s simply who he is. Because he’s Haechan.

Haechan always have girls lining up for him. Be it cheerleaders, overachieving know-it-alls or even the band geeks. Everyone is just waiting for their time to be noticed by him. Everyone including you.

Haechan was always fine with being alone. He never cared, having you around him most of the time was enoug for him. It’s your nagging about his habit of brushing girls off that finally snapped him into going on dates after dates with girls he barely care about.

The more it goes, going on dates with random girls have turned into an escapism for Heachan. Something to get his mind off of the fact that you always say yes to guys asking for your time.

“This is my bestest friend in the whole wide world.” you drunkenly blurt out as you introduce Haechan to the guy you’re currently dating. Calling him to pick you up from Haechan’s birthday was probably the dumbest thing to do. Given the annoyed smile plastered over Haechan’s face for the rest of the night. An annoyance you’re absolutely clueless about.

Haechan was never insecure about himself. He was raised so well, he never seek any validation from other people. None except from you. And now, looking at you all cozied up with your designer wearing boyfriend and his fancy watch that shines a little too bright under the dim light, he feels small.

So small, Haechan wishes time would just pass by until that guy eventually break your heart and you have nowhere to turn back to except him.

•••

more of my stuff on my masterlist🤍 & twitter🌞

special tags; @aedreamzy @eleven23

my taglist are open<3

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madisonbeersource · 1 month

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NO WAY HELLO U GOT ONE OF THE DISK?!?! u deserve it so much im so happy for u :')))

pls tell me how was everything, i want to know.

I CANNOT BELIEVE IT MYSELF I GOT THE FUCKING SIGNED CONFETTI !! thank you so much baby ): I swear I never thought that would happen!!

it was....surreal! I drove 4 hours and a half to Paris, near the venue, changed and I arrived at like 3:40 pm cause paris is SO COMPLICATED TO FIGURE LIKE THE TRAFFIC? A NIGHTMARE qsdfghgf but got to see where i was born anyway i was like i'll go to the venue even if I have to be there a lil later and god there were so many people already so i went to a line but it was the king of everything line so i switched and met a SUPER NICE GIRL there she was alone too so we started chatting in line, got some goodies from fans, then the KOE vip got in, then we did, got some merch and went to the actual venue and waited for her Q&A, SHE WAS GLOWING she was so happy to be there and she did not stop smiling, we chatted a moment, she answered some questions, a fan came dressed as the home to another one alien so she was so happy about that! she said that she was so exited to come to paris to quote her "the highlight i was waiting for the whole tour" AW :') bear my kids anyway.

then she went to get dressed while we waiting for the 1st and 2nd part, and i bought a seated ticket i was supposed to be seated but w the girl i was with we saw that there was still room front row like very front row !! so we rushed there and we were like okay we see her so well let's stay?? like, there was us, the lil space where the security is, was giving us water it was so welcomed qsdfghgfds and then the stage!! fuck the seated ticket i would be so close to her, and actually from the confetti canonball sdfghgfdi could almost reach it. First part was actually amazing, I LOVED JANN like I didn't connect the dots but i already knew him since i am OBSESSED w "gladiator" so i got pretty hyped to see him. THEN MY BABY WENT ON STAGE!! everyone was SO GOOD i never had such an experience we all felt like we knew each other we sung together held hands and screamed the lyrics, she was glowing her voice was SO HEAVENLY BEAUTIFUL she even played the piano while singing at your worst which she normally would play on the guitar but she told us in the Q&A that she had a surprise for us, so it was even more special, and SHE LOOKED AT ME STRAIGHT IN THE EYES WHILE SINGING DEAR SOCIETY !!!!!! (maybe she recognized me cause she saw me right when her life support album came out we could pay for a zoom meeting and i got ticket for that and since she easily recognizes people she maybe did IDK BUT WE SHARED A SACRED MOMENT) i was dying i couldn't even fathom what was happening and still can't to be honest!! i have a few videos that i took (51 total lmaoo) and i got to capture this moment and i will cherish it forever. the whole concert ended too quickly we danced, we cried, we held hands and we screamed, honestly it was so good she cried while singing king of everything i think the energy got to her and she was so happy that she shed tears, special thanks to mama beer who was recording for a while and her brother that played the guitar for ryder!!

the confettis canonball was magical and the perfect ending to this beautiful night, and like she held the 2 flags we gave her in the Q&A and then she got out and then went back to dance w us one last time, and then we got some music for the end, and while i was taking all the confettis out of my body cause mind you i was literally in front of it, the light came back a lil and looked over at everything and then suddenly on the floor, and then i remembered the black confetti, so out of naivety i looked at the floor like literally the second i looked i saw a black circle i was like no that is imposisble, i reached for it light speed qsdghgfds and turned it over and it was her freaking signature on it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was like OMGGGGGGG and some was like wtf where did you see it, and they took photos of it while i was over the moon w joy, the perfect ending of a perfect night ): i'll forever cherish it and i'll def go back to see her next time she comes to Paris!

you got the inside!! I hope it was clear for u, but i love you so much i wish we attended the concert together that would have been like a dream, but maybe someday<3

#ask #omg this gif is my favorite thing to look at

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randospuzzlecorner · 5 months

Text

Riddle

I've been asked if I've seen Ted-Ed's riddles, and I have! They actually inspired this blog. The riddle for today contains a couple of references to a few of their own riddles, so see if you can spot them. :P I've also chosen to emulate their style of narration this time, mostly for the heck of it.

As usual, if you want to try the riddle for yourself, the clues and options available in each category are listed down below, after the scenario, with the step-by-step solution under the Read More.

The newest game in your favorite series, The Fable of Hilda: Dongle's Difficult Dilemma, has just been released, but just as you enter the store to get your copy, you learn that someone has just taken the last one on the shelves. The cashier pities you and offers to allow you to purchase one of the copies they have in storage reserved for the rest of the week, but only if you can solve his riddle. He tells you that there were five customers present besides you today, and each of them bought a different game, paid in a different way, wore a different color, had a different snack on them, and had a different discount on their purchase. He gives you a list of clues you need to use to figure out who had what, along with the available options for each category.

"If you can figure out who bought which game, then I'll let you through," he says, before leaving you to your own devices.

Can you figure out who had what? You might want to get a pen and paper, if you want to try this yourself.

Options for each category:

Games (will use acronyms to make it a little less cluttered):

Diskymon Mythos: Arsauce (DMA)

Wicked Fighter Buddies Supreme (WFBS)

Nalvi and the Bygone World (NatBW)

Hyper Luciana Sisters Awe (HLSA)

The Fable of Hilda: Sobs of the City (SotC)

Payment Method:

Cash

Credit Card

Debit Card

Mobile App

Gift Card

Color of Clothes:

Blue

Red

Yellow

Green

Purple

Snack:

Chips

Pretzel Bites

Candy

Granola Bar

Gummy Bears

Discount:

10%

15%

20%

25%

Clues

The customer with the Chips was somewhere after the person who paid with a Debit Card

The first customer had a 15% discount

Wicked Fighter Buddies Supreme (WFBS) was bought with a 25% discount

The customer wearing Yellow came sometime between the customer wearing Blue, and the customer who paid with Cash, in that order

The customer who paid with a Mobile App is right before the one who bought Nalvi and the Bygone World (NatBW)

The first customer bought Hyper Luciana Sisters Awe (HLSA)

Diskymon Mythos: Arcsauce was bought somewhere before Sobs of the City

The customer who had Gummy Bears was not first.

Nalvi and the Bygone World was bought immediately before Wicked Fighter Buddies Supreme

The customer who paid with a Mobile App did not have a 5% discount

The customer wearing Purple was in between the customer wearing Blue, and the customer wearing Yellow, in that order

The 25% discount was either the first or last one used

(Solution below)

Solution:

Those of you who've seen me talk about the Einstein Riddle in a previous post might recognize what we're looking at to be a Zebra Puzzle. For those who don't know, a Zebra Puzzle is a type of logic puzzle where you must use clues in order to place assign the right attributes to the right column.

So, let's begin by making a table that has each of the categories given to us as the rows, and each customer as the columns.

To start, we can place the options given to us by clues 2 (The first customer had a 15% discount) and 6 (The first customer bought Hyper Luciana Sisters Awe), who respectively give the discount (15%) and game (HLSA) for the first customer.

From there, we can place the 25% discount as the fifth customer's, as clue 12 (The 25% discount was either the first or last one used) said it was at one of the ends, and one end is already taken. This also gives us WFBS, thanks to clue 3 (Wicked Fighter Buddies was bought with a 25% discount).

Next is clue 9 (Nalvi and the Bygone World was bought immediately before Wicked Fighter Buddies Supreme) placing NatBW in the 4th column, which in turn answers clue 5 (The customer who paid with a Mobile App is right before the one who bought Nalvi and the Bygone World).

There are only two games left, and we can get the position of both of them from clue 7 (Diskymon Mythos: Arcsauce was bought somewhere before Sobs of the City).

It's here where we run into a problem, however. None of the clues that remain (1, 4, 8, 10, & 11) give us enough information to deduce their placements, and not all of the options are even listed within a clue. It seems like we have nowhere left to go. Did the cashier just decide to give us a rigged puzzle that's impossible to conclusively answer?

As a matter of fact, there's a surprisingly simple solution to this conundrum. You think back to what the cashier told you, and that's when you realize something.

The cashier's words were "If you can figure out who bought which game, then I'll let you through." He didn't say you had to figure out where everything went, he only wants to know where each game was, and the only category that you could fully complete is the only one you need.

You return to the cashier, telling him what you've found.

He chuckles. "I guess I couldn't trick you, it seems. Alright, I'll let you through. Just remember, you still have to pay for it."

You leave the store with the game you were looking for, having solved your own Difficult Dilemma in the process.

As said above, I really tried my best to sound like the Ted-ED videos. If you can read this in the narrator's voice, then I consider that a success. See y'all for the next riddle!

#custom riddle #zebra puzzle

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dailyrandomwriter · 5 months

Text

Day 471

Today was both a chaotic shitshow, and a relief. It was stressful and anxiety ridden (the non-fear anxiety variety for those in the know), but at least I know now I’m not completely hopeless with the new database.

As expected the database launched with more than a few bumps. Between some features not being up and running, and the migration of data having a few glitches, it was no surprise that this was an overwhelming experience. Especially with everyone messaging back and forth with questions as they dove headfirst into the day’s work. It was a bit hard to stay on task as the team chat room kept going off with messages. I had to work hard to work on the task at hand rather than to look at them.

This has always been a constant problem, being distracted by emails and messages. A feature of mine that has given me glowing reviews from my co-workers for being very quick to respond, is also an awful bug that can cause me to lose track of what I’m doing.

Speaking of bugs and features, one of the really nice features of the new database is the ability to modify how you see things in the system. It allows you to show as much or little data as you need for things like contacts and service information. However, when starting out, the system will show you too much information until you pare it down. Being in the new system was like booting up a new computer for the first time; you need a bit to set things as you like it.

The other fascinating thing about the new system is that dealing with it gave me front row seats to my form of anxiety. I was anxious that morning because I couldn’t get what I wanted to do right away. There was catch up to do from not having the system yesterday, and not everything was working so I could get to booking. This was on top of knowing everything would take me longer to do.

But this wasn’t fear.

I wasn’t afraid of anything, there was no fear of failure, of not getting things done (which was very weird considering I go on vacation next week), and no fear of things falling apart. As time went on, it became more of a frustration that I couldn’t just do what I needed to do. It certainly nearly brought me to tears, but I wasn’t afraid during this process.

In fact I was very tempted to walk away and do some crafting instead to just calm myself down. The near tears were real after all. Perhaps an extreme reaction to the frustration of the day, because by the afternoon things were at least primarily working. I started reserving appointments and booking appointments. There’s actually a really nice workflow developing due to how I keep my notes and where the schedules are kept.

The fact that things calmed down so much that I began to get sleepy, which is most likely due to doing something very mundane, means that I’m comfortable. A very promising sign indeed.

Granted, I still have gone out of my way to further calm (treat) myself. I have milk tea and a slice of lemon cranberry cake in front of me. I get to open one of my packages, which holds most of my new bear journal tapes and I’ll be spending an hour or two sorting those before going onto my chores.

And hopefully tomorrow will be much better.

#blog #just a blog post #daily blog

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literatigifs · 4 years

Photo

• literati alphabet: Crush

#literatiedit #literati #filmtv #tumblrusercassie #reputayswift #gilmoregirlsedit #gilmore girls #rorygilmoreedit #rory gilmore #jessmarianoedit #jess mariano #mine #made by angela #litalphabet #the first row looks awful I know but bear with me #that first scene is a deleted one in dvd quality #jess x rory

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dear-ao3 · 3 years

Note

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks!

Youguys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey

sticks,dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All

right,here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no!

You'redating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be

lunch formy iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former

queenshere in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see

how,by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but

thereare other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your

smokinggun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out

likethis. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But

isn'the your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see

anickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

- bee movie anon

#if i had to see this all you fuckers do to #not a tag #from saph #im not having a good morning and this made me cry thanks for that #the bee movie #long post

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bloodycassian · 3 years

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Reader x Cassian - Hellish Prompt: Reader is an assassin/spy that was caught and azriel has spent months torturing her for information and can’t get anything out of her and cassian eventually goes to see who this assassin/spy is and the mating bond snaps and cassian beats the $hitt out of az bc of the mating bond instincts and rhys has to intervene and break up the fight (i was thinking this could switch between azriel’s POV at the start and then switch to cassian's POV)

AN- this was SO fun to make. Please more requests like this!! I love the idea of unexpected mates!

TW -blood/ blades.

Drip, drip, drip. Copper smell filled the small room. Blood leaked down the drain in the floor. You wheezed a laugh bitterly and spat on the ground at his feet. Azriel's rage simmered calmly under his dark shadows. They coiled, ready to strike. Wanting to strike. The sound of your feeble laughs was practically the only sound Azriel had gotten from you for the first week of torture. The second week was worse, even for him. Truth teller revealed nothing when he gouged into your skin from the bottom up. Truthfully, he was impressed beyond measure. But that didnt mean that he could stop the job at hand. He had to know, and wished he didnt have to do this kind of thing to get the information from you. "Listen..." He sighed, cleaning his blade. He was always nervous whenever he had a back turned to an enemy, no matter how well they were restrained. But he trusted his shadows enough to tell him if something was wrong. "If you just.. Cooperate and tell me where the Queens are, we can let you go. No trouble, just releasing you back to Rask." He tried to keep his tone neutral, but he was nearing an exhaustion point. Torture every day for two weeks had its toll not only on the victim, but the dealer as well. His shadows seemed to be growing restless too, waiting for a chance to strike. He watched your reaction from the corner of his eye. Noted the way your head hanging loosely seemed to gain a bit more strength before you spoke. "Losing your touch, Spymaster?" You revealed a row of bloody teeth to him, and grunted when the chains at your wrists stung the magic that weakly attempted to help you. Azriel could have sighed. He could have laughed and bled you dry. Have a healer come and patch you up enough to keep you alive. The idea was tempting, but he didn't like having anyone besides his brothers see him in this mode of darkness. He could have brought Rhys down to attempt to break into your mind again. After the first attempt and Rhys' reaction to being blocked, he wasn't eager for that again. So he sighed, and brought out the potions laced with Faebane. + He was convinced you weren't a normal Fae. After months of his best torture methods he was a wreck. "She just-" He tried to hide his frustration, but his brothers knew him best. Cassian smirked by the fire, warming his wings. Rhys seemed a bit more concerned, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. Azriel had never been one to spend a long time on torture. Rhys saw the frustration flowing from him after every session with the stubborn Fae in the dungeon cell. "I dont know what to do anymore. She's the only one to have never broken." He ran a hand though his hair. His shadows seemed weak, exhausted like him. Rhys considered for a moment, looking between his two brothers. Cassian seemed to be enjoying Azriel's frustration. Maybe a bit too much. Rhys sipped his wine then, with a look of innocence, "Maybe we will have Cassian end it. Perhaps seeing the Lord of Death in front of her will knock something loose." Cassian's stare whipped to him, a silent plea on his face. "We should leave it to our expert Rhys-" Azriel laughed, cold and bitter. "The expert hasn't got a damn thing out of her. We either kill her or send her back to Rask with all the information she's collected about us. With nothing in return." Shame lined his features. The sense of failure to his high lord was a heavy weight to bear. "Cas...I expect you down there tomorrow afternoon. It will be her last chance." Rhys' no nonsense tone shut down Cassian's retort. His jaw locked with distaste. He hated the cramped cells below the house of wind. Hated the way going underground made his wings feel like they needed to stretch. The worst was when that stale air was laced with the rotting smell of dead mice or old blood. It made his skin crawl just thinking about it. "Come on Cas, dont you want to see the only one that's outlasted me?" Az asked with a mock grin. He couldn't give the same smile back. Turmoil spilled inside him at the thought of going so far below the mountain. + Cassian took a long time to go to bed that night. His restlessness about the next day made him wake up over and over, never having more than an hour of peace before being waken up. Azriel held up a mug of tea to him the next morning. "You look like shit." He handed his brother the mug with a small smile. Cassian glared at him, but took it anyway. He went to the balcony, his heavy wings needing to feel the fresh air. It was like taking a bath after being covered in grime. He sighed in relief, letting the late morning sun graze his body. The cold wind from Illyria was beginning to come in for the winter, and the familiar smell ignited something in him. He felt a draw, but shoved it to the back of his mind. He knew what he had to be this day. "Why the hell do we have to keep them so far down again?" Cassian complained. Around and around and around. Down deeper and deeper into the pit of the mountain that the house above was carved out of. Cassian felt like his lungs were collapsing the further they went. He tried not to let his nerves show, but he knew Az's shadows would pick up on it anyway. "Remember when you broke your arm chasing down that Attor?" Azriel could have laughed at that memory, but the story surrounding it made the experience soured. More shame on top of the guilt already there. Cassian hummed in approval, welcoming the distraction the memory brought. He tried not to focus on how each turn of the staircase got darker and darker. How the air seemed to compress around him. He locked his eyes on the scar on one of Az's wings. "And we spent a week fixing the top story of that apothecary?" He asked, keeping his voice steady. "Yes. Dont you remember how the Attor got out?" Cassian shook his head, and Azriel huffed a laugh. "I left the door open for just a second to get a new knife and..." He shook his head, part in anger and regret, part in shame. "It had escaped before I turned around. I dont know how it happened, to this day." Cassian stared at the back of the shadowmaster's head. The dark ripples around him seemed to spike. "It happens Az, you can't be perfect." "It's not perfection, its basic thought. After that we moved all enemies to the lower dungeons. No matter the threat. Rhys even put wards on the arches." He ran a hand over the walls, his fingers catching a few of the grooves that linked each spelled archway to the other. Cassian left the conversation at that. At least his brother wasn't brooding as much as before. The dim lights began to come into view, and his heart began hammering. Adrenaline singing through his veins. His polished siphons glowed, reflecting red off the dark stone ceiling. He had polished all his black armor the night before, when he couldn't sleep. Something poked, prodded at him all night. Keeping him awake. He figured he may as well make use out of it. "She's not going to talk to you unless you show..weakness first." Azriel said in a low voice. Cassian nodded, reaching the end of the stairwell with him. Cassian couldn't see the dark figure in the cell, but he felt the presence nonetheless. The dark draw that you demanded. He wondered how Azriel had dealt with that pull this whole time. The tantalizing draw to you. He shook his head, pushed the hair out of his face and nodded to Azriel. He opened the door, then began his ritual. At the start of every session he would toss a bucket of water over your body, then a bucket of salt. It made the wounds that handn't healed fully scream in pain. You jolted at the suddenness of it this time. "Good morning, shadowsinger." You ground out, voice rough with strain. Cassian watched in awe at his brother. Cassian was never one for torture. There was a reason Azriel was appointed to this position. Watching the calm cruelness of him was jarring, but Cassian kept his face straight. He stood behind you, watching the flimsy attempts to pull at the shackles holding your arms up. Lacerations dotted each arm, some light pink scars. Some were still scabbing over. A chill ran down his spine. "You have a guest today, would you like to see him?" Azriel's voice was cool, calm. Like he was speaking orders to a group of soldiers. He began slicing new lines into your arms, moving up to your neck. He had left your ears in tact, as a last resort if you refused to speak to Cassian. The pull Cassian felt was overwhelming. He walked a bit too quickly around you, plastered on a wicked smile for show, then crouched down. The smile faded when he finally saw your face. Your dripping hair was a horror on its own. Plastered to the skeletal cheekbones, and pale eyes. Those eyes were brighter than anything he'd ever seen. A field of flowers down the slope of Illyrian mountains. His world shifted, drawing the breath from him. "Mine." His mind seemed to roar with that alone, but in a thousand different variations. "Lover, friend, partner, mine mine mine. Mate. My mate." His lips quivered with the realization. With the way his heart soared, and the way he moved without realizing it. He choked a gasp, and fell forward on his knees before you. He saw the same astonishment in your reaction. Azriel dropped his sword, confusion and concern alert on his features. "Cas wh-" Before he could finish, before his shadows could detect that Cassian had even moved, his brother was on top of him. Cassian's knuckles stung with every punch. A new kind of rage flared inside him. It made his muscles yearn for violence. Made his teeth crave the flesh of those that so much as looked at you wrong. There was no mercy for Azriel, it was as if he was an enemy on the battlefield. Cassian held nothing back. You hung limply from the chains that bound you. Crunch after crunch sounded from Azriel. He eventually managed to push Cassian off of him. Then they locked together in battle again. Clashes of armor against armor were deafening. The snarls they ripped at each other were loud enough to make you cringe. Your heart squeezed at the sounds of Cassian's breath. At the scent of blood spilling. You pulled feebly at the chains, your mind roaring to protect him. Your mate. You tried to watch the battle, but the weakness in your body refused to let you turn more than a few inches. They were panting, Cassian fighting with a ferocity Azriel had never seen. His eyes flared with rage, like he was possessed. "Cas-" Azriel grunted, shoving his brother backwards. His back hit yours, pushing you down and digging those stone cuffs into your wrists. You hissed in pain. Cassian roared and lunged at his brother again, and again. The darkness that boomed outside the cell was jarring. The stone ceiling shuddered, small rocks and dirt falling from it. Cassian did not stop. He didn't hesitate, coming at Azriel with punch after punch. His fist crushed the wall behind where Az's head had been.

"Enough." The high lord's cool command was enough to make you still your weak attempts at looking at the two. Cassian's chest heaved as he tried lifting his arm to punch Az again. Pure fury in his heart was enough to make him disobey Rhysand's order.

Then Rhys' talons gripped him. Freezing his mind, stilling him. Rhys' face shifted to surprise at what he glimpsed at there. "Oh.." He breathed. Azriel panted, backing away from his brother, out of the cell. He locked the cell and wiped the blood from himself, his wings hanging limply behind him. "What- the hell." He panted, nursing his arm. Cassian's eyes locked to your small frame. How your muscles quivered, how your arms shook with the effort of holding yourself up. He felt Rhys' claws recede slowly from his mind, releasing each part of him one by one. He rushed to you. He picked up Azriel's sword and with a clean, masterful swipe, broke the enchanted stone that bound you. The weak sigh that came from you was heartbreaking. His eyes pricked with tears, and he caught you before you could fall to the floor into the puddle of dried blood. He didnt notice, or care that it was there. He sat there with you, cradled you and shook with you.

"Cassian... She's.. Cassian's mate." Rhys said slowly, astonished. He didn't take his eyes from his brother in the cell. Azriel froze in place. For a moment, the dungeon was completely still. Totally silent, as if the world waited for what was to come next.

Azriel turned on a heel and left, trudging up the stairs. Rhys dared not touch his mind. "Cassian...." He spoke, trying to get his brother's attention. He did not glance at Rhys, just curled around your body more. Protecting, nesting almost. Rhys knew the feeling too well from the weeks after he and Feyre's bond snapped into place. "We will check in tomorrow. Be safe, brother." Rhys spoke to Cassian's mind. It was nothing but an ocean of rushing thoughts. Cassian could have bared his teeth, could have tried to fight his brother through the bars of the cell. Hell, he could have probably broken through those bars with the primal strength flowing through him with the rush from the bond.

But he didn't. He stayed, his warm body pressed against yours. Those siphons glowing against your skin like a fire. He stroked your hair soothingly, his tears like rainfall on your body, through your bloodstained clothes. He didn't remember falling asleep there, but it was the most restful, peaceful night he'd ever had in his existence.

#acotar #acotar fic #reader x cassian #cassian fic #cassian #azriel mention rhys mention #cassian x reader

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miekasa · 3 years

Text

iced tea

+ pairing: levi ackerman x reader

+ genres and warnings: college au, levi is the best not yet boyfriend au, erwin would definitely be an insufferable project partner to have but you gotta love him au

+ summary: there are three rules of night class. come on time, come prepared, and come with snacks. you forget about rule number three. luckily, levi’s there to save the day.

There’s only one appeal to signing up for a three-hour night class, and it’s that you only ever have to muster up the will to attend once a week. It’s a sacrifice, but it definitely cuts down on the temptation of skipping like you would a normal, one-hour section course. Just one and done.

Plus, you have Erwin with you in this class. Is he a little bit of a professor’s pet and consistently overly chipper every class despite knowing he’s about to endure 180 minutes of lecture? Sure, but at least you don’t have to suffer alone.

Really, it’s not as bad as it sounds, especially if the course is interesting enough, or easy enough, and luckily for you, yours is both. Not to mention, your professor is brilliant, actually entertaining, and does her best to keep the class engaging—she’s funny in the dorky, lovable professor kind of way. And she gives you short, ten to fifteen minute breaks at every hour mark just to make sure everyone doesn’t completely lose their minds.

It’s a commitment, but you’ve grown to actually enjoy it. As long as you follow the three rules of night class: come on time, come with your notes prepared so that you don’t get upstaged by Erwin, and come with—

“Fuck,” you curse, watching as Erwin pulls out one of his many, tiny, organic, boxed juices. The ones meant for children with soy sensitivities that Erwin claims are packed with more nutrients.

“What’s up?” He questions, more shocked than concerned, at your sudden profanity as he sets his juice box in the right corner of his desk.

You pout. “I forgot to bring snacks.”

Come on time, come with your notes prepared so that you don’t get upstaged by Erwin, and come with snacks. Those were the only three rules of night class, and you’d completely forgotten about the most important one.

“Oh,” Erwin grins, pulling a chocolate bar from his lunch bag and taunting you with it, “Sounds like a you problem.”

You snatch a piece from the top corner, stuffing part of it into your mouth to spite him; but you regret your choices as soon as it melts on your tongue.

“What the fuck—is this mint chocolate?” you complain, swallowing the rest of the sweet with disdain.

“Yes it is,” Erwin huffs, grabbing the remaining stolen bit from between your fingers and popping it into his mouth, “And it is delicious.”

“You’re an actual menace to society.”

Erwin crinkles his nose at you, “A menace to society with snacks for the next three hours.”

His comment makes you groan, albeit a little dramatically, and you slump back in your chair to debate your options. Class doesn’t start for another twelve minutes; you could try and run to the student center quickly to buy some last minute snacks, but the line was probably already lengthy with students of similar trains of thought, meaning you’d be late if you stuck it out, which would leave you violating rules one and three tonight. Erwin makes you sit in the front row with him, and you were not willing to take the late walk of shame with an armful of snacks in tow.

You could wait it out until the first hour break, but they’ll probably be sold out of anything good by then, not to mention the race to beat out the line again. If you played your cards right, you could order food during class and time it so that it was delivered during your break, but that was risky.

Alternatively, you could try and sprint to the concessions stand near the library, but going there and back was so much further away than the student center; you’d probably end up late, too.

“Hey,” you call to Erwin, refraining from rolling your eyes as he sets all six thousand and twenty eight of his colored pens on his desk for the evening, “Is Hange still on campus?”

“No, they have work today.”

You groan. Why did Hange have to be so responsible and good with their time-management skills. They was your last hope. Unless—

“Do you think Levi will bring me Starbucks?”

“Probably,” Erwin shrugs, humming to himself; but then he thinks it over, replying again with a knowing smirk on his face, “Actually, definitely. If he’s still here, but he probably is. You know him.”

You pout, the possibility of Levi being home is high, but so is that of him being cooped up in his favorite library. Either way, he would likely be studying right now, and you’d hate to disturb him, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

[sent 6:47pm] you — leeevaaaaaaaaai are you still on campus

[received 6:47pm] leeevaaai — yes — why, what’s wrong

[sent 6:47pm] you — uwu — wanna bring me something from starbucks before class — i have my 3 hour lecture today and i forgot snacks :—( — and erwin won’t share his organic $1500 whole foods gummy bears with me

[received 6:48pm] leeevaaai — i told you i don’t like the smileys with the noses, they’re ugly — should you even be drinking coffee this late, you’ll be up until the ass crack of dawn

You scoff audibly, and Erwin takes this as an invitation to peep at your screen. Your comment about his snacks does not go unnoticed, as bitterly munches on his (yes, in fact, organic and gluten-free, as if it being mint flavored wasn’t criminal enough) chocolate bar.

[sent 6:48pm] you — that’s RICH coming from you mister

[received 6:48pm] leeevaaai — you’re being awfully rude to someone you expect to buy you a $7 drink

[sent 6:48pm] you — hehe sorry i loooove you leeevaaai — venti iced chai latte — light ice

[received 6:49pm] leeevaaai — do you think i don’t know your overpriced starbucks order by now

[sent 6:49pm] you — uwu :—)

[received 6:49pm] leeevaaai — but you’re getting a grande, i’m not made of money — and it’s punishment for sending another ugly nose smiley

[sent 6:49pm] you — un-uwu

“I don’t blame him,” Erwin chuckles, scrunching the wrapper from his now finished bar between his fingers.

You flick him away, ignoring the turning heads of your classmates as Erwin’s pens fall in the aftermath. It’s seven o’clock on the dot when your laptop pings loudly with an incoming message from Levi—and a subsequent groan from Erwin, who breeches your personal space once more to press the mute button on your keyboard.

[received 7:00pm] leeevaaai — where are you sitting

[sent 7:00pm] you — front row to the right — erwin’s idea not mine

Levi spots Erwin’s bright blonde hair before he sees you, scoffing to himself as he makes his way to the front of the room; a tray with three Starbucks cups, and a plastic bag in tow. Erwin sees him first, too, waving at him as he crosses from the left side to where the two of you are seated.

“Aw, Levi, you brought me one!” Erwin all but squeaks, reaching for one of the other drinks with grabby hands after you take your iced drink from the tray.

But Levi pulls one hot drink from the tray for himself, and pulls the remaining one out of arm’s reach. “As if,” he grumbles, bringing his own cup to his lips.

“You’re the best, Levi,” you smile, sticking your tongue out at Erwin. Levi only offers you a small nod as acknowledgement. He extends his left hand now, the plastic bag sliding off his wrist and onto your desk, silently.

Confused, you lean forward, setting your drink down to open the contents of the bag. Inside, there are two granola bars, a bagel, cream cheese, some kind of sandwich, and a small Nutella to-go cup with mini breadsticks attached. When you look back up at Levi, he simply shrugs, sipping on his drink again while a light pink dusts over the tips of his ears.

“You said you forgot your snacks,” he explains, “I knew you’d text me the whole time, bitching about how Erwin wouldn’t share his zero-calorie lemon rinds if you didn’t have your own.”

You take note that the chai he brought you was, in fact, a venti, and not a grande like he’d threatened, and that the granola bars in the bag are not only your favorite flavor, but from your favorite brand, too; and you find yourself smiling as you decipher the very clear message underneath Levi’s less than poetic words.

“What’s in the other cup?” Erwin asks, pointing at the remaining drink. Levi carefully lifts it from the tray, and sets it down on the other corner of your desk, a safe distance away from your laptop.

“Tea,” he says shortly, “So you don’t lose your mind after inhaling your coffee.”

“This is tea, too. Chai is tea, Levi.”

“Tea without milk or six kilograms of sugar,” Levi corrects you, “Or ice.”

“Iced tea is tea, you know.”

Levi doesn’t respond to that with anything but a glare. You smile at his stoicism. Erwin thinks the whole exchange is kind of weird, and wonders where you possibly get the gall to make fun of his taste in snacks when you can’t even realize you’re in love with a man who refuses to identify iced tea as a valid form of tea.

“I better go before she starts,” Levi speaks, a single hand referencing to your professor behind him, who looks just about ready to begin class for the evening, “Call me when you’re done, I’ll drive you two home.”

“Oh, you don’t have to, Erwin and I usually take the b—”

“Brat,” Levi cuts your words short, “Call me when you’re finished. I’ll be in the library.”

You throw daggers at him with your eyes, but your resolve is waning, once again, as you closely read at the implications of Levi’s promise. You accept, and Erwin is more than happy for the free ride.

Levi hums. “And eat the bagel before the Nutella.”

“You’re annoying.”

“I’m a saint,” Levi deadpans, placing the palm of his hand on the top of your head affectionately, “Call me.”

He walks away before you can debate again, just as your professor speaks into the microphone to grab everyone’s attention. You scrunch your nose, hands flying to your hair to smooth out the aftermath of Levi’s playfulness, before opening your notes for the evening.

“You’re really dense aren’t you?” Erwin asks, one eyebrow raised, but the overall look on his face is more than fond, “It’s kind of cute.”

“Huh?” you question, cheeks stuffed with food as you bite into your bagel, “Dense about what?”

Erwin shakes his head, turning back to laptop with an exasperated expression, the fondness in his eyes fading quickly. “Hopeless,” he mumbles, “The both of you.”

#aot x reader #snk x reader #levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #aot imagines #snk imagines #levi ackerman fluff #levi ackerman smut #levi fluff #levi smut #erwin x reader #eren x reader

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