#the fucking mpreg joke

[koscheyyy]

Fuck everything else we learned in the Intermezzo, i wanna know who got Kayne pregnant

#malevolent spoilers #malevolent podcast spoilers #malevolent podcast #malevolent intermezzo #intermezzo spoilers #kayne malevolent #been waiting a whole fucking month to make this stupid joke #mpreg canon in malevolent

[monwogi]

i really pushed it this time…

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel fanart #hazbin hotel lucifer #lucifer morning star #mpreg art #LOL #can you fucking believe this #yeah it’s a joke

[mittysins]

What happens when the old abandoned android you found and decided to restore happens to have a mind of their own?

Teach them all they want to learn about being human, obviously. While also giving them some sweet upgrades!

Meda doesn’t know who made Drew, but he DOES know that Drew is incredibly unique. They have little recovered memory of their life before their shutdown, and they aren’t quite sure what their purpose is, but Meda told them that not everything needs a purpose. Some things can just be.

#mpreg #tmpreg #it’s not incredibly obvious but Meda is definitely pregnant in the second image #Drew is sitting on a tattoo chair by the way #Meda felt really weird having them laid out on a table to be worked on once they woke up so he obtained one by totally normal means #Drew doesn’t need the neck pillow for comfort #Meda just gave it to them once as a joke and they liked that he found it funny so they’ve used it since #they don’t fuck btw #they get. kind of intimate but it’s under the guise of educational purposes #so I’m sorry to disappoint but the robot is not somehow the other parent 😔 #m draws

[steelthroat]

One thing that surprises me is that there are countless fanon and canon ways that explain how new transformers are born, no one decided to steal the "build-a-baby" idea from the Robots(2005) movie.

Seriously, are you telling me that mpreg is a canonically better idea than that one???

#transformers #maccadam #steel rambles #shitpost #maccadams #I honestly think that movie is a masterpiece #it was my childhood #I lost the dvd but I almost remember every sentence #I should watch it again #also I feel like there's more to be said about this and transformers #especially after watching a very interesting video analysis about it #but I should really rewatch it before doing so #also idk honestly I applaude our fandom for coming up with various and increasingly weird ways to make children #I may joke about mpreg but honestly I don't mind #it's just that I hate children in fiction and any depiction of anything resembling a pregnancy #so imagine how thrilled I was about reading some of the tf comics #fucking pregnancy metaphors everywhere I'm telling you #lol

[jefferythejelly]

"foolish i feel like you would have an easy pregnancy"

#i went back in the vod expecting there to be context but no she just said this near unprompted😭😭😭😭😭 #chat Was making pregnancy jokes (foolish got mad abt smthn inconsequential and they were making pregnancy hormones jokes) so i assume it wa #s from that but like she did truly just say all this unprompted😭 #foolish gamers #tinakitten #kkatamina #abe #i never know how to tag for abe. like his twitch user is just abe but thats so nonspecific. ah well #my clips #actually the crazy thing is i agree with her bc i have thought about this before for various au's #but also crazy as fuck that tina of all ppl is validating my mpreg au headcanons like where am i. what are we doing here

[fogsy-feel]

Baby Mine

The baby (because that’s what it is, he keeps reminding himself. A baby) Is this ugly wrinkly thing in his arms. This tiny, freak of nature that ripped it’s way out of his stomach and tore up the world. The doctors tell him he should hold it shirtless. That skin on skin is important. He tries not to look at where it lays on his chest and refuses to look in the mirror. It would probably be all too familiar. Deathly pale skin, black circles he knows will take weeks to sleep away. Weeks he doesn’t have. Not with the baby.

He let’s the dad name it. Him. It’s a boy, whatever it is. Derek say’s he’s probably a werewolf. Stiles doesn’t really now what that means. He knows it’s Derek’s though, however that happened. Those bright little eyes. Derek said he’d take it  look after him. For a little while. While Stiles sorts things out. 

He never quite recovered from the madness of the nogitsune, and the baby is nothing but a reminder of it. He can feel what they share with the fox. The link connecting them. Like if he looks down, that same madness will collapse between them both. A spill from him to the baby, and the baby to him. He tries to smile. Derek is just so happy. It’s everything he ever wanted. A family. A proper family. Stiles should feel proud that he gave him that. But all he wants to do is leave the thing on the side of the road, in a box and a blanket. With a little note and the words beware. It feels dangerous to hold. The weeks go by, and the idea becomes more and more tempting.

Dad says it’s just the stress getting to him. That when he goes to the shops and leaves Eli in the car it’s just and accident. He’s tired. That’s just it. Then he forgets to feed him, and Derek say’s maybe he should take a few days off/

He dreams of the baby. Of fire, and darkness. He dreams that it isn’t real. That it’s a changeling, tunnelling it’s way into their lives. It’s just dreams. But Stiles has thought that before, and he has to make sure. They tell him later that he’d lost touch with reality. Again. That he was hallucinating, and that’s why he did what he did. Eli was fine, thankfully. A real boy it turns out. They tell him it was because of the birth. Postpartum- blah blah blah. It doesn’t matter. He Isn't supposed to do this. He isn’t supposed to carry, or raise or anything. Derek doesn’t understand.

That’s okay. He’s good at this. He’ll be fine without him. Eli will definitely be fine without him. And they are. For fifteen years, they handle it.

-

Then Derek had to go up and die, and suddenly Stiles was supposed to be a parent again? “You don’t need me kid.” He reminds the boy.

“Yes I do!” Eli barged through the door with a scream. He’s in pain. His dad’s dead. Everything hurts, but this pain? This rejection from Stiles? It’s a pain he’s known since birth.  “I’ve always needed you! Especially now! Because Dad’s gone and-”

Please don’t say it.

“-you’re my Mom.” He says it with finality. Like the sad fact it is. “You.” He whispers. 

They both wish it wasn’t true, but it’s pointless. They’re connected. Through a bond they’ve tried to deny Eli’s entire life. But they are unquestionably linked. By the madness of the nogitsune. By the familial bonds of motherhood. By the grief that premeditates the air. Stiles remembers a five year old boy, telling him the exact same thing. He can no more deny Eli’s declaration now, than he could back then.

He has Derek’s eyes.

#Sterek #Sort of #Stiles #Eli Hale #Angst #cw mpreg #fanfiction #drabble #Sterek fic #teen wolf #Derek Hale #Yeah I said I wasn't going to write this but Ao3 is still down #i think #And I have nothing better to do #I just like mommy issues Eli Hale #Because that's like the worst way a kid can be fucked up lol #ok not really but let me joke #Derek can get resurrected or whatever #Don't take his too seriously Ao3 was down I was in the trenches

[jerseymuppet]

maybe the culture cringes at me. have we considered that?

#cringe culture is DEAD FR #<- about pulling up into a mutuals dms and asking them to beta mpreg fanfic about MIDDLE AGED FILMBROS. FROM MILWAUKEE #they said no 😎👍🏽 #and it’s like? didnt I used to have anxiety? #I don’t even mind.... #this sertaline no fucking joke dawg #tbf I’m not writing it for me I’m writing it for my bestie because I love them and will go anywhere for them. including milwaukee apparentl #jude.txt

[liesmyth]

👀do u have any f1 fic recs 🙈

I obviously do, ty very much for asking. I actually made a rec list just yesterday for a friend with no specific preferences, so enjoy a variety of ratings / pairings / etc — Here u go! I reserve the right to add more to it as I keep digging into the kinkmeme rabbit hole. Make sure you're logged in because most of it is archive-locked as god intended

#I have made this joke before but. I think archive locking F1 RPF is a necessary measure to protect the mental well-being of Sharl Leclerc #who's way too fucking online for his own good #and god forbid he ever found the RPF... he would die #not because of the shipping or the knots or the twinky crying mpreg. #but because of the sheer number of fics about him leaving Ferrari #I do believe he'd cry fr #ask #f1 #f1 rpf #<- for blacklist #f1 fic rec #f1 fanfic #fic recs #anonymous

[minthe-lover]

can we talk about WHY rachel basically threw in mpreg in her series?????? and why the baby was born from zeus' thigh?????? i mean from what ive read(sorry if this is wrong) dionysus is born from zeus and persephone or zeus and semele(sometimes demeter's kid) and yet rachel thought mpreg via thigh was the way to go and it was clever??????? am i the only one who finds that aspect really fuckin weird????????

So a few things that Imma have under the cut cause it all spoilers

So Zeus giving birth via the leg is something in the original myth... And from my weakish understand of Greek myth it's.. decently close besides one big thing.

So in lore Olympus we have Semele and Zeus have a long term on and of again relationship. She gets pregnant goes into labor way to early then dies. Zeus then has dio sown into his leg so he can finish growing.

The main difference from the myth is that hera is the one that tries to kill Semele... I'm pretty sure, but in lo hera is just not mentioned and it's all natural causes. Obligatory I'm not an expert but the thigh birth thing is something while weird does have a bases.

Also smallish side note..... I don't really mind the whole mpreg aspect... Like it's not as activity transphobic as I feared, it's joked about but more cause of the leg stuff then the man giving birth. While like pretty much all the time it shows up in media it's either a joke or transphobic... I honestly kinda want a story about a man that gets pregnant and it's treated seriously... Lore Olympus is definitely not that but far from the worst case I've seen...

Plus like... It's not really the whole mpreg kink stuff, it missed alot of the shit it's more known for... Like he's not even visibly pregnant in anyway. It just doesn't really fit as much as shit like the foot fetish stuff.... Like come on there isn't even one mention of breeding Zeus it's barely qualifies as mpreg.

#i could honestly do a while rant about the difference of mpreg. transphobic jokes. and just men who can get pregnant. #but i am way to fucking tired for that #and it would very much be a none lo related rant #anti lo #lo critical #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical

[monsterexer]

Not to be rude to the enthusiastic anon wanting to recommend a piece of media/content that involves mpreg in it, buuuut I feel like ranting a bit about how much I dislike stories that involve male pregnancy (subplots) as to just be some joke or shock value or horror :(

(Well, horror can stay I guess, that can sometimes become weirdly kinky in an appealing way lmfao)

The joke is to make the character be wildly OOC because of moodswings and cravings and aches/pains. Then the whole "Where's the baby going to come out? o_O" has me like im so tired y'all

Look, I don't mind there being moodswings and cravings, I think those are sometimes endearing and silly. But all too often it feels like these things are exaggerated and made to be gawked at. Like the pregnant man has his belly out because he doesn't think to get a proper fitting shirt (though in most cases with alien pregnancy things, the pregnancy progresses so fast so they don't have time to change clothes) or suddenly he's gorging out on pickles because pickles are the one thing that pregnant women people crave.

I'd be earnestly curious if there's ever been an mpreg subplot that was played more similar to the common place "normal pregnancy" subplot. I know there are maybe two, threeeee movies that involve a man being pregnant and they don't immediately jump to full flanderization of the character because it's what the movie is fully focused on, but even there the pregnancy comes about by scientific means and the pregnancy is a freak-of-nature or scientific-breakthrough-miracle, thus the antagonist force is to... kill... the baby..?? I don't actually know, but because it is not "normal" it is "wrong" 🤷

So yeah I'm sorry I don't mean to rag on someone's earnest and well meaning recommendation, I promise I don't want to make you feel bad over it 😞 I just have a particular standard of how I enjoy pregnancy content and it definitely is not fulfilled by typical media.

#literally anytime i hear that X thing has mpreg in it I just groan and scrub my face #if it has fpreg or ''normal pregnancy'' then i can at least expect something of value #but mpreg is the ultimate punchline that for some reason is still played for complete laughs #if not for a joke then it's the ultimate life lesson for why 'being a woman is so hard' #which is ANOTHER FUCKING MESS OF A SITUATION WHERE IT NORMALIZES WOMB=WOMAN #if you want my recommendations on some good pregnancy media that I've come by I'm happy to supply but none of it is mpreg sorry

[divine0]

If it was only asking to change a username, it would have fine, it’s just the way you handled things and other things that has popped up from you three has made a lot of people icky, but it’s not up to me to explain it to you, let the void news explain it

SORRY I DONT LIKE JOKING ABOUT SUICIDE AND MPREG AS IF ITS MY FUCKING FAULT !!

#as someone who has been suicidal i don’t think that making a very overt part of your blog about suicide #i don’t think that’s appropriate!! #and mpreg…. don’t even fucking get me started #are you just making a joke that men can get pregnant because the concept of a pregnant man is funny to you?? #do you also laugh when a trans man gets pregnant?? because that’s mpreg #is that fucking funny??? #sorry that i stopped being mature after a certain point #but tagging half the fandom here saying that i’m in the wrong along with my friends is EXTREEMLY INAPPROPRIATE #ask #anon #twomp

[dailykeiji]

(hi, unrelated anon here but i just wanted to make sure you're okay with the weird pregnancy/sex jokes since i know i wouldn't be)

i'm fine with it for the most part!! it takes a lot to make me genuinely uncomfortable honestly........ but i WOULD prefer if you guys didn't make jokes that involve calling me weird petnames haha

#if i was uncomfortable with all the mpreg/sex jokes for real i would've just told everyone to fuck off or something don't worry #everybody's just goofin.......... i mean i think anyway. are some of you actually into mpreg. don't answer that #ask tag

[piosplayhouse]

!! BINGQIU MPREG IDEA !!

Wgen binghe gives birth sqq weighs the baby and names it Seven Balls after the person who was the most influential to him and binghe getting toegther 🥰🥰

#fuck you #svsss #scumbag self saving system #scum villain's self saving system #shen qingqiu #sqq #bingqiu #lbh #luo binghe #svsss shitpost #tw mpreg #mpreg #obligatory joke tag

[thatoneautisticfnaffan]

i did not need to see the "William Afton Mpreg Tumblr Post" today miss autisticfnaffan. /nm. lighthearted, even. ( bottom line is im not upset lmao )

Don’t worry, it’s just a joke based on something one of my mutuals said. The "William Afton Mpreg Tumblr Post" isn’t real (for now anyways), it can’t hurt you.

#the fact that one of the FNAF books canonically has fucking Springtrap mPreg makes this joke even worse- #responses #professional-frights-fanboy #mpreg mention

[thatgamecake]

*clears throat* …ffmpreg

#ffmpeg #mpreg #joke #fucking stupid

[val-el]

joker mpreg isn't canon guys let's all calm down /lh

#this is a joke don't come for me #but for anyone who doesn't keep up with the man who stopped laughing comic #and is seeing about it solely through social media #the comics issues have a joke issue at the end #that's like a max of five pages iirc #the first one was joker x power girl #little joke issues #a joker type of joke at the end of the joker comic #and the mpreg was part of that #it was a fucked up joke at the end of the issue #not an actual part of the comic #so like #if you're freaking out because you think it's canon just know it's not #and laugh at the fact that dc included that at all if not #just wanted to say something because the amount of people who think it's canon djhfkdjfha #susch quin #joker #the man who stopped laughing