I think it's interesting to look at the 'Mr. Bridgerton' scene as a backdrop for the eventual mirror scene. Firstly, in the fact that I think we've kind of misinterpreted it.
So many people are of the mind that scene's purpose to 'drag' Colin, but really, that scene has 3 primary functions. The first is to inform Colin that Penelope is aware of what he said of her, thus opening the door to clearing the air between them and providing an avenue for which Colin can apologize. The second is to establish the ground that they are currently on: Penelope has given up on the dream of Colin Bridgerton, in particular the perfect prince that can do no wrong, and has made it clear to him. It also creates distance between them that they will bridge.
But the third, and to me the most wrapped up in the mirror and the inner workings of their relationship is that it reveals how Penelope feels about *herself*. It's not necessarily an echo of what the ton considers her as, after all, we have a lot of evidence indicating that, for all intents and purpose, people aren't *unkind* about her, but rather that they ignore her. Audience members recognize this as Penelope's own shyness being the cause, she is often sitting off on the sidelines or not really talking to much of anyone, in the books she's referred to as the 'one who doesn't speak', and her LW business takes her away from being a character in the action of the ton to a bystander, kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts that perpetuates itself. Pen felt unseen so she became LW to have some power, but then LW herself must remain unseen and Penelope continues to be by design of her own making.
No, I think what it really reveals is that Penelope has incredibly low personal self esteem. We as a fandom has lauded that scene as her dragging Colin, saying that he's cruel and calling him Mr. Bridgerton is absolutely meant to create distance between them, but I don't think she's dragging him.
Because the person she is *actually* dragging here. . .is herself. And it is a general theme in her life. In Whistledown. Aloud. Even with Marina, when she complimented her, she assumes that she's lying. When Edwina says she's wearing a pretty dress, Penelope puts herself down and doesn't believe her, even when the compliment is genuine. In truth, Portia is not seen as being particularly unkind to Penelope. At least, speaking as someone who's mum was *awful* about my size and weight and outfits, Portia is. . .overall rather mild. She's not KIND and loving, not by a long shot, but she's also not targeting Penelope only. She's plenty mean and critical to Prudence, too, even to the point where she foists her off to her own cousin as a pawn piece. Penelope has low self esteem because of a lot of reasons, she's bullied by Cressida (I think a lot of girls are, she was pretty mean even to Daphne in S1) and her family isn't very tender to her, and she's not being pursued at every turn, but part of it is also her own perpetuation.
Listen to what she says "Of course you would never court me" "I embarrass you" "I am the laughingstock of the the ton". She sees *herself* as an embarrassment. She puts *herself* down. Arguably, more so than the ton does. She's meaner to herself than anyone else is, aside from Cressida. And honestly? Looking at Colin's face there. . .he is HURT that she considers herself this way. That she's projecting that onto him. Yes, he's hurt that he hurt her, of course he is, he never wants to hurt her. And yes, he's ashamed that he said he wouldn't court her the way he did and that in doing so, he validated her fears that she is unloved and unwanted, but also because. . .she already feels that way about herself. She's felt that way for years. And it's painful to care about someone, to see them as wonderful, and realize. . .they don't feel the same about themselves at all. I don't think Colin is out here feeling so wounded over the fact that she called him cruel and won't refer to him by first name anymore, but that he's most hurt by what she says about herself.
Because he *doesn't* see her the way she accuses. She says she never expected him of all people to be so cruel, but he feels the same way. He never expected her to be so cruel to *herself*. He wants to go somewhere private, not because she is an embarrassment, but because he wants to have a private conversation with her. Maybe assure her. Maybe explain himself. Maybe hash it out. But god Luke Newton's acting. . .he is *aching* for her. And it feels like he's going to do those lessons not in atonement for what he said (thank god) but to genuinely help his friend who thinks badly of herself. To lift her up. It's not about him at all, not about earning forgiveness, but about elevating Penelope. And that's. . .fuck, I just find that's just so heart stoppingly beautiful.
You can see, in that scene, how much he cares about her. How deeply and genuinely he adores her as a person. And just how painful it is for him to know he has validated, whether on purpose or otherwise, how poorly she feels about herself. How low her self-confidence really is. She is giving him a glimpse into the cracks of her heart, and when he sees them, he wants to reach out with both hands and make it feel better. Make her feel better.
After she says 'even when I change my entire wardrobe', he looks so fucking crushed. So 'don't say that'. So 'you really believe that?'. So 'God, I hate that you think that way'.
Because regardless of it all, he does love her. It's not romantic yet. It's not sexual yet. But he genuinely, truly, from the bottom of his heart, thinks she's wonderful. That was evident even in the 'purpose' scene. Every time Penelope opens up and reveals a facet of herself, he likes it. He likes her barbs and her dreams, he likes talking to her. He likes her. And he feels awful that he hurt her. And he feels awful that she's hurting herself. He loves her. He wants her to love herself.
And that's where the mirror scene comes in. Because the mirror scene isn't about sex, not really. Not entirely, at least. The mirror scene is about *intimacy*. The mirror scene is about being seen. Not just her seeing him, or him seeing her, but for Penelope to see *herself*. In a way, through his eyes. Because hers are biased rather negatively toward herself, which is evidenced in the 'Goodnight Mr. Bridgerton' scene, and in so many little moments we've already gotten where she's literally looking down on herself, feeling down. She doesn't necessarily *like* what's in the mirror, but he does. Because he likes *her*. And he wants to show her that he does. Show her that he finds her beautiful and have her recognize that in herself.
The 'Goodnight Mr. Bridgerton' scene is about Penelope revealing how she sees herself. The mirror scene is about Colin showing her how *he* sees her. The Goodnight scene is about Penelope thinking she means nothing to him, that he thinks of her the way she thinks of herself, that this is how everyone thinks of her, and the mirror scene is a direct response to that: No, he doesn't. No, he doesn't think she's embarrassing. No, he doesn't think she's a laughingstock. No, he doesn't think she's unappealing. And he doesn't think she should, either.
And he's going to show her that. Not just tell her, but show her. The mirror scene is so often a focus on Penelope, so much of Polin is in Penelope's focus, but approaching it from Colin's perspective and his motivations is so fulfilling, too. It's a glimpse into them in conversation, and a demonstrate of how Colin loves her. How Colin loves in general, openly and earnestly and altruistically. How he encourages her to be braver and more confident in herself, bolstering her because he just likes her *that much*. How he finds the most fulfillment and satisfaction in caring aloud. The mirror scene is a demonstration of his heart in reflection.
When Luke Newton said the first word that came to mind with the word 'Mirror' was 'Exposed', he doesn't just mean physically. He means emotionally, too.
God this couple is so fucking good.
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Avatrice
The growth!!!
Uncomfortable hug from Beatrice who barely knows Ava, but, although hesitantly, still comforts her.
Beatrice’s absolute pride in Ava’s success
(bonus: Bea realizing her feelings)
The emotional support hug. They are grounding each other. They are each other’s person.
The we did it! The oh thank god you’re okay hug. Both Ava and Beatrice latch on so quick and tight. They cannot bear the thought of the other getting hurt at this point
The absolute relief from Beatrice that she did not loose Ava, and Ava so happy Bea is there to support her. (Bonus the little neck kiss)
And finally the kiss. Ava has been pining over Beatrice all season. Beatrice who is struggling with her feelings because of her vows. But Ava is about to go, and she cannot leave her love without letting her know she loves her and just how much she means to her. While also simultaneously showing how much she has grown because of Beatrice (“once you realize everything is not about you”, and then easily dodging Bea’s attack to pull her into her arms in the the smoothest way possible. Lastly, her new faith. She tells Bea “in the next”. After putting on the crown she realizes that there is something else out there, something that will bring Beatrice back to her when Bea’s time comes. She isn’t running, not like she did before, she is saving her sisters and her love despite knowing she is going to die). Beatrice made Ava better, but Ava also made Beatrice better. Beatrice opened herself up to get close to someone again, not just her sister Warrior’s who, even then seemed to keep them at arms length. Beatrice in the first season would do anything for the OCS. In this season, Beatrice would do anything for Ava.
So THIS, your honor, is character growth and slow burn at its finest.
Thank you, Warrior Nun.
In this life, or the next
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What I love so much about the loveybug au, is that it showcases the dichotomy to Marinette's character that we often seen ignored or overlooked by the more obvious example of Adrien's.
The truth is that Adrien and Chat Noir simultaneously exist as attributes within the complexity that is Adrien's character and psyche. While they are different, they are not opposites, they are compliments of each other, and the show does a great job of highlighting that.
Marinette on the other hand, is never really questioned for her alter-ego, she is Ladybug, plain and simple. Except, it's not so simple, Marinette's personality is actually close to being, if not as much, as complex as Adrien's.
Adrien often uses Chat Noir as an escape from the personality repression he faces as himself. Marinette on the other hand, is more repressed as Ladybug. She is focused on goals and on the safety of others and she cannot act on her emotions. She does not find it to be the time and place to let free, to truly be herself. But at least she lets herself be free as Marinette, right?
Well, it's actually not that simple.
Marinette has quite a bit that is keeping her from feeling free as herself. The claims that Marinette was the more free, the more open personality of the two never really made much sense, as Marinette is still pretty tightly wound, she is constantly reacting to and experiencing a level of anxiety that keeps her grounded and pulled together.
What I find so admirable about the Loveybug au, is that Loveybug is a direct response to what Adrien does as Chat Noir. Even Catwalker is not a complete reflection of Ladybug, for it isn't a true repression in the way Ladybug is, it's more of an imitation of his Adrien mask.
What Loveybug does is introduce a new method to analyze Marinette, in acting as a foil to the "Chat Noir persona", this alter-ego actually and explicitly exemplifies what Marinette would be if she really let loose.
The Loveybug au accomplishes the task of showing how deeply misunderstood Marinette is by so many people. In showing her at her most open, we can see what she is actually holding back as herself. She is not simply an optimist, she is not naturally brave. She, like Adrien with his persona, have to fight and struggle to keep their heads high and a smile on my face. The fact that this au can display this is part of the reason I love it so much.
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