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reiderwriter · 4 months

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Unhappy Holidays

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Summary: You're unlucky enough to run into Spencer Reid at holiday celebrations four years in a row. In the New Year, you're resolving to rid him from your mind forever, but you never were one to stick to resolutions 👻🦃🎄🎆

Warnings: SMUT 18+ minors dni, enemies to lovers, low-key work rivals, semi-public sex, car sex, hate sex, fingering, thigh riding, creampie, unprotected sex (no condoms but contraceptive mentioned), slight spoilers for s4 of Criminal Minds (but not really).

Prompt Request: #50"You're so fucking obsessed with me.” #82"Really? Because your pussy is saying something different, sweetheart.” #93"Use my thigh. You've been staring at it all night anyway.”

A/N: This is my first submission for @imagining-in-the-margins November/December Office Party writing challenge! I'm sorry I've been so busy recently, but the holiday season really does take a lot of effort to get through at work lmao. Hopefully, I'll be able to post more over my vacation! For now, enjoy some very unserious smut~♡ (as if I write any other kind).

Here's a link to my masterlist, where you can find all my work!~☆

Working with the FBI was no walk in the park, which, from your desk at the opposite corner of the bullpen, Spencer Reid sure made it look like.

Working on adjacent teams for the last three years had become gradually infuriating. You were forever in the man's orbit, stuck dealing with the other women on your team sat giggling about him and his many stupid haircuts, and wondering just how far you'd fallen to have to stare at his stupid face 5 days a week.

If you were unlucky. His team did happen to be out on cases a lot more, whereas yours handled correspondence and consulting cases, a cushy and safe job.

It annoyed you to no end that you had multiple field-based qualifications, extensive fire arms training and were top of your class at the academy only to be relegated yo desk duty whilst boy wonder with his doctorates was allowed to trip over his own feet catching actual killers.

Other people wondered where your dislike of the man sprang from, and you could only let out a disgruntled squeak and tell them your horror stories.

A few months into your job, your been fresh faced and bushy tailed or however that saying goes, and overly eager to take any assignment that came your way. Even if the assignment was baby-sitting an injured Doctor Spencer Reid. He'd been shot whilst out on a case whilst trying to talk down an unsub, and you'd jumped at the chance to get to know him.

He was an office legend, of course, though those days it was more for his characteristic lack of social graces rather than the beauty he'd grown into. You'd been so eager to get to pick his brains, find out how he'd managed to score the position on the BAU at such an early age.

Reality had hit you square in the face when he'd spent a week ignoring you, making you run around like a headless chicken searching for hard copies of documents the FBI had digitised a millennia ago, and hadn't so much as spared you a glance.

The straw that broke the camel's back came as you were running back to him triumphant with a document he'd requested eight hours before and had let yourself into Penelope Garcia’s office quietly, only to hear him bad mouthing you.

“She makes me uncomfortable. I've had her out searching for useless files all day because I don't know what to do with her.”

“She's trying to help, Spencer, it's her job right now, cut her some slack.”

“Her job is currently getting in the way of mine. I even tried writing my own doctor's note so I could get rid of her, but Hotch wouldn't allow it.”

You'd dropped the file loudly on the table, watched the two spin around with horrified looks and turned silently and left the room.

He hadn't once tried to find you after that, and you let your apprenticeship under Doctor Reid quietly fizzle out as you got back to your regular work.

Your resentment still burned though.

Each time you'd been caught in the same elevator with him, you'd ignored him to an almost insane degree, enjoying the way he squirmed and tried to make small talk.

You'd been in contact with JJ and his Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner as well, through cases you'd recommended, but always maintained your cold shoulder.

The one place you could not ignore him, however, was a Penelope Garcia party.

After you'd slammed the file down on her desk, Penelope had guiltily sent you a gift basket filled with sweet treats and books, and had hounded you for a week to make sure your feelings weren't too damaged by her friend's stupidity.

You actually liked her, and found at least one silver lining to the storm that was Spencer Reid ripping through your life.

In the three years since the “incident,” you'd found yourself at three parties where Penelope in all of her heartwarming ways had tried her best to force a reconciliation between the two of you, to disastrous results.

The first was a Halloween party, and you'd been incredibly proud of your Princess Laia costume when you'd arrived. Only until you'd gone to the kitchen to top up your drink to hear Spencer Reid boring some guest or the other about how Star Trek was more advanced, and had a richer plot line.

Penelope had stepped into the kitchen just as he'd caught a glimpse of your (rather skimpy) outfit - yes, you'd chosen swimsuit Laia, yes, you were going to own it - and had immediately jumped into introductions, as if you weren't already intimately acquainted.

“Spencer! This is Y/N! She loves Halloween, too, she makes all of her costumes. You guys should talk.” She'd led the other guest away and left you there with Spencer as you'd awkwardly looked upon his own costume.

“Are you the Tenth Doctor?” You asked begrudgingly, noting his pin-striped suit and the shorter hairstyle he'd chosen.

“Are you a fan? I prefer the original show run more than the current stuff, but David Tennant has really been doing a wonderful-”

“I'm sorry, let me stop you there. I don't watch Doctor Who. I guess I prefer something with a… How should I say, richer plot?”

He'd snapped his mouth shut and didn't have chance to open it again before you turned dramatically and walked away from him.

The second party you'd been cornered into was just over a year later.

Having been stuck in the office over Halloween, Penelope was determined to get in one last celebration before Christmas steam-rolled every other holiday, and thus you'd been invited to her single-people-only-friendsgiving-potluck, and you'd found yourself having to navigate knocking on her door with a casserole dish in your hands.

Luckily a large hand had appeared from behind you and knocked on the door for you. Unfortunately, the sudden shock from the silent appearance of a man right behind you startled you so much that the dish fell straight from your hands anyway.

Penelope opened her door upon hearing the crash and you whirled on your would-be attacker.

It was Spencer again, eyes round in shock, hand still curled into a fist.

You took a calming breath as you gathered yourself, trying not to bite his head off. You wanted to scream and shout and rip his head out but you didn't, instead letting the fury drip into your voice as you finally opened your eyes again.

“That dish took me four fucking hours to make.” You huffed in anger once more as Penelope guided you into the apartment and poured you a glass of wine before you moved back to the entry hall to clean it up again.

Needless to say he didn't care to converse with you after that.

A few small parties in between had been blissfully Spencer-less and you'd lulled yourself into a false sense of security. That's when you accepted the Christmas party invitation.

As one of the unlucky few members of the FBI who had to stay out over christmas in case of some emergency or the other, you'd been grounded in Virginia, unable to travel home for the holidays. So Penelope Garcia's singles-only-Christmas-fun-time-Party was your last ditch effort to spend the holidays actually resting and eating good food.

Learning from last time, Penelope reassured you that there was no potluck, that she had prepared all the food herself, and all you'd need were a bottle of wine and a willingness to party.

You'd taken those recommendations as law and had immediately let yourself into a glass of mulled wine as you arrived, and - noticing that the party was Reid-free - had allowed it to raise your Christmas spirits slightly more than you usually would.

By hour two of the event, you were full of yuletide joy and swaying freely along to the tune of Silent Night.

Spencer’s late entrance really would have gone unnoticed by you had you not bumped face first into his chest as you spun yourself around in your dance, his hands quickly falling to your hips to steady you.

The few moments it took you to gather yourself were about as long as you needed to realised that he'd caught you in his arms underneath the mistletoe. And with your mind fogged by mulled-whatever-it-was-Penelope-mixed-into-that-punch, the part of your brain that objected to the very existence of Spencer Reid went silent, and the incredibly tiny and somewhat damaged part of your brain that instead saw him as attractive started shouting loud instructions.

Before your common sense could return, you pushed yourself up on your tiptoes to kiss the very warm, very close man holding you upright.

“Mistletoe,” you muttered as you clawed his arms off of you and took yourself straight to Penelope's bathroom to throw up.

So yes, your acquaintance with Spencer Reid had never been good, and you were perfectly fine with resenting him from afar, privately.

With three years of bad experiences under your belt, you weren't excited at completing your yearly tradition of horrendous interaction. Which is perhaps why you immediately and loudly protested Penelope’s New Years Eve party invitation.

“Y/N, it's a party. What's the worst that can happen?” She pleaded as she followed you down the corridors of the office building.

“I could see Spencer Reid. I could be forced to converse with Spencer Reid. I could get absolutely wasted and kiss Spencer Reid. There, three options, please accept my resignation from partying.”

“Y/N we both know you don't drink anymore, so at least one of those is unlikely to happen. And Spencer might not even come, he has tickets for an indie theatre from 6pm onwards, they're playing some Russian movie from the 60s that's like 4 hours long or something. So u retire yourself and tell me you'll come?” She had to take three or four steps for each of your own, not that you were so different in height but because you were practically marching in order to avoid the topic.

But you finally stopped and let out a sigh as you turned back to Penelope who stopped just before she ran into you.

“You're sure he won't be there?”

“I'm sure he RSVP’d no.”

“Fine. But I'm not drinking and I will still be expecting the Penelope Garcia virgin punch experience.”

“Bring the party poppers and you have a deal.”

“Done.”

–X–

Over the week since you'd accepted the invitation, you'd made peace with it. For the most part, you did love a Penelope Garcia production. There was something wonderful about your friend and her ability to brighten anyone's mood, an ability that was only heightened at holidays. She was like a glittered goddess gaining power when worshippers used her altar, except the altar was her house and the worship was a range of hallmark-induced holidays.

You arrived at the party at 10pm, and though that was the start time you'd been given, you weren't surprised to see a full house of Penelope’s team mates already in attendance. Derek Morgan, Jennifer Jareau and Emily Prentiss sat spread across the sofa in the living room area, and you noticed a few techie friends also grabbing drinks and chatting.

“Y/N, I'm so glad you're here! You remember everyone on the team, right?” She pulled you into a hug and then sat you down in the middle of the group, waiting for you to mingle and become comfortable before she ran off to more hostess duties.

“Of course, nice to see you guys.” You grabbed your promised punch and sat back comfortably, striking up a conversation with Emily about how bleak the dating scene had been recently.

“It seems like all the men around me are jackasses,” Emily muttered and you giggled along.

“I'm wounded,” Morgan shot back, a hand pressed to his chest in faux pain.

“Good. You're like a lion out there in the clubs stalking gazelles, it's like watching a nature documentary when you're out there.”

You almost snorted your entire drink up your nose as Emily finished, needing to compose yourself for a second.

“I guess the men on our team aren't great with romance,” JJ laughed and took a swing. “Hotch and Rossi have four divorces between them, and Derek here is a lost cause.”

“Our only hope is young Spencer. May he grow into a respectful young gentleman and break out curse,” Emily toasted.

“Oh that ship has sailed,” your laugh this time was bitter, your mood immediately growing sour with even the smallest mention of Spencer Reid.

“Ah, Penelope mentioned you had a problem with our boy wonder. Care to share?”

You opened your mouth to give your standard non-answer and move the conversation along, but you were interrupted.

“Yes, Y/N, care to share? I am slightly curious about that as well.” You turned around and there he was, and your stomach turned in disgust.

Just one time, just one party. You'd been having fun, and here he was to ruin it.

“What are you doing here?” you gaped up at him, unsurprised to see him still decked out in sweater vest and slacks even in his down time.

“I was invited.”

“You declined, Penelope said you had movie tickets.”

“Ticket, singular. And it was cancelled so here I am. What's your problem with me, Y/N?” His jaw clenched and he grabbed the back of your chair and leaned down. It was supposed to be intimidating, but you rolled your eyes. When he looked that attractive, veins in his arms popping out of the sleeves he'd pulled up, you couldn't see him as intimidating. His arms were distracting yes, but God that was nothing compared to his thighs. His pants were tight, and you thanked whatever Clueless tailor had sewn them, because you now allowed yourself a momentary lapse to enjoy the appearance of his lower body.

You tried to shake the thought of his attractiveness from your mind, reminding yourself where you were and in what company.

“I don't think I need to answer that. I think I'll enjoy holding it over your head instead,” you said, standing up and beginning to gather your things.

“Wait, Y/N, where are you going? New Year isn't for another 30 minutes.” Penelope scrambled over and grabbed your hand, pleading with you to stay.

“I'm sorry Pen, but there's just this very annoying bug buzzing around me, and I think I need to get away from it.” You said your goodbyes and excused yourself from the party, happy to have walked away relatively undamaged.

Fate had other plans, and as you stepped out of the apartment building ready to walk yourself home, a hand caught yours from behind as a voice chased you.

“Y/N, wait. I'll go. You go back inside.”

“And return with my tail tucked between my legs after making a grand exit? I'll pass, thanks boy genius.” You shook yourself from his grasp and made to walk away again, but he quickly matched your pace and stepped into your path, cutting you off.

“I can't let you walk home. It's like 40° out here, and your coat is more style than substance.”

“Get into a car with a stranger? I'm sure you of all people know how stupid that sounds.” You stuck a finger out and poked his chest, but he grabbed your hand and held it in place as he spat out his next words.

“I'm not a stranger, I'm the man you're obsessed with, Y/N. Big difference.” You laughed, mostly in shock at his indignance, but he stared at your face as serious as could be.

“Me? Obsessed with you? I'm not the one who followed a woman they're barely acquainted with out of a party filled with all of my friends. Sounds like you're projecting, Spencer.”

“Am I?” He questioned, stepping closer and grabbing your hip as he continued his questioning. “I wasn't the one who was sat there talking about me with all of my colleagues.”

“Well, I wasn't the one who turned up to a party I'd declined an invitation to.”

He was imperceptibly close now, hand gripping your hip so tight you wondered if it'd leave you with a mark.

“I certainly was not the one who initiated a kiss last year, Y/N. You need to face the facts, you're so fucking obsessed with me.” If his hands had you feeling dizzy, his words were completely knocking the sense out of you. Suddenly you returned to the person you'd been under that Mistletoe, and everything from his closeness to the rough edge to his voice begged you to do it once again.

“Go fuck yourself,” was about all the words you could manage as he finally let his lips fall down and crush into your own.

You should've pushed him away, but instead your traitorous body wanted to prove his point, opening up for him faster than you'd opened up to anyone else before.

His tongue flicked against your lips and you gladly let him explore your mouth, opening up to tangle your tongue with his.

He tasted sweet, like the punch Penelope had handed you earlier, only now you wondered if someone had accidentally laced it with how free you were being with your affections.

He resurfaced for air, but you didn't care if there was nothing in your lungs at all if it meant that his lips would engage your own in battle once again.

“Look how much you want me,” he smirked. “Look how needy you are after a single kiss, chasing my lips like that.”

“You and your big fucking mouth. I wish you'd shut up once in a while.”

“I'll make it my new year’s resolution.” His lips joined your own again, and you clashed hard, exploring as much as you could muster as he pulled you in the direction of his car.

“I'm not driving… home… with you,” you growled between kisses, trying not to put your teeth to his neck and bite down hard. You're not sure if that impulse was a murderous one or a kinky one.

“I'm not putting you in the front seat, Y/N, I'm putting you in the back. You should be familiar with the idea.”

Heat sparked between your legs, and you allowed yourself to be manhandled into the beat-up trash heap of a car.

He'd not taken his hands off you as he got you in, pushing himself in first and then pulling you by the hand that you'd unconsciously gripped hard. You immediately straddled his hips, skirt naturally riding up in the process. He noticed and looked curiously down at you, growling as you pressed your lips against his neck and grabbed you instead by the hair gathered in a ponytail at the back of your head.

“See, you're obsessed with me. Just admit it.” Without breaking eye contact, he dug his fingers into the material of your tights and pulled in opposite directions, leaving your underwear exposed to his wandering eyes.

“I'm not obsessed with you,” your voice needed conviction to land, but it came out as a lusty whisper, especially as he slipped his fingers inside your underwear and finally touched your aching cunt.

“Really? Because your pussy is saying something else, Princess.” He found your clit faster than you'd ever expected, rubbing slow circles into your skin as you began rocking your hips back and forth.

It was becoming hard to disagree with him, with each flick of wrist growing the heat between your legs. You attacked his neck again, hands practically ripping at his top buttons so you could muffle the sounds of your arousal against his neck, collarbone, chest, any stretch of that pale skin available to you.

He forced your hips to a stop with one hand as he slipped a single digit inside of your hole, gathering your arousal as he set a steady pace, thumb keeping your bundle of nerves occupied.

“Listen, Y/N, can you hear that?”

“I can't h-hear anything.” You had to grind your teeth together to get the words out with minimal interruptions of moans bursting from the pit of your stomach.

He leaned in close to your ear, nuzzling your neck and placing chaste kisses up towards your ear, finally pulling away just enough to whisper a single word in your ear.

“Liar.”

His hand stilled and pulled off you quickly and your eyes broke open, hands unconsciously fitting into his shirt as if you were worried he was going to leave you there like this, on the edge of pleasure but still so far away.

“Use my thigh. You've been staring at it all night anyway.”

“Jackass. You've only been here for like 20 minutes.”

“You can climb right out of this car if you want to, Y/N.” He tried to keep his tone light, but the death grip he had on your thighs, the very obvious tent pitched in his pants and the way his eyes couldn't go five seconds without undressing you told you you had more power in this interaction than he wanted to give you.

There was no way either of you were letting the other go unused tonight.

You relaxed your grip on his shirt and shifted your weight to one of his thighs. Lithe he may be, but lowering yourself down there was an unexpected strength there. He watched on curiously as you rocked experimentally against him. Back and forth you rocked, trying desperately to keep up his momentum or tempt him to help you out again.

It was time to let your voice back out, and you did, moaning without a care as you hummed his leg like a bitch in heat.

“You're enjoying this lot, huh, Y/N,” he muttered, and you watched as his hand worked his pants zip open, removing one of the barriers in the way between the two of you, as he began palming himself.

“What's that saying? Anything you can do, I can do better?” He growled at that response but didn't stop you. Instead he bought a hand down on your ass as you moved, so hard you jolted at the sudden pain. Your eyes shot open as your hips stilled, but you felt warmth grow between your legs.

“Yes, you definitely enjoyed that. Should I do that again, or do you think we should hurry this up and go back up for the countdown?”

You hesitated only a second before you pushed his hand off his lap, shifting your hips further towards his knees before letting your hand reach for where his had just been.

You didn't let yourself think about how big he was as you pulled his cock free, didn't let yourself wonder how he measured up against anyone you'd been with before. You didn't let yourself waste time thinking about how various office rumours were true, and definitely not a second was wasted feeling jealous about how those rumours were spread in the first place.

Instead you simply slammed your lips back against his, mouth opening to let your tongue engage his as you lifted your hips with his help and lowered yourself down on him.

You didn't have to rid yourself of sinful thoughts after that as he purged every single brain cell from your head, filling you so contently that there was simply no space for anything but him.

You locked up on top of him, clawing at his shoulders as you whimpered at the stretched, falling so he was balls deep inside you. You wanted to move, to use him for your pleasure, but your walls tightened every time you even thought about it as he stroked your hair through it all.

It had been some time since you'd last had a sexual partner, and you needed the few minutes to overcome the first uncomfortable bliss of it all.

“That good?” he whispered, but the harsh tone of earlier was gone, replaced only by unsure humour to break the silence.

“Been a while.” He nodded, kissing you again to distraction as he shifted your positions.

Cradling your neck and securing your legs comfortably around him, he lowered you against the backseat, pulling out slightly as you adjusted to the new angle.

“Better?” You nodded quickly, because it was. There was no more pressure on your legs, and despite the cramped space in the car, you had enough space to lie almost flat.

“Yes… thank you.” Just as his cutting tone had escaped him, you also heard your own tone softening, the sigh of contentment slipping past your lips almost sweet. Almost.

“Are you going to fuck me now, or what?”

He let out a shocked laugh, but lent down to shut you up with a kiss nonetheless. Bracing himself against the car door, his hips softly rocked into you, pace increasing until you were back to the edge of cumming, nails pressed hard into his skin until you were sure he was going to complain.

He didn't though, but kept up his thrusts, until your vision suddenly darkened and stars exploded in them, rolled back in your head as they were.

“Shit, shit, shit, shit, where should I…?” He panicked, but you wrapped your legs around him, grabbing him by the tie and pulling him down to swallow his moan as he shot his load inside of you.

“Birth control.” You whispered when you finally let him go, gasping for air. “Contraceptive pill. No need to get the car dirty.”

He collapsed on top of you then, forehead resting against your own as you both caught your breaths.

The moment was silent, and you found the synchronicity of your breaths almost calming. Eventually you had to break apart, and he helped you up to a sitting position, but didn't break eye contact as fell back into his lap.

His hands stroked your back, dipping to your ass at times, but he didn't talk. Neither of you did.

The eye contact between the two of you was possibly the most pleasant conversation you'd ever had.

“I'm sorry.” He blurted, just as fireworks erupted into the night sky. Your heart shook, and you weren't sure of it was the shock of the sound, or the way the rainbow of lights illuminated his sincere expression.

“You don't have to apologise for cumming in me, Spencer.”

“Not that. Before. The casserole and the mistletoe, and the Halloween costume.”

“Wow. Um, okay. Apology accepted, I guess, though I'm not entirely sure why you're apologising now.”

He took a deep breath just as another set of fireworks went up.

“I pulled you under the mistletoe. It was Penelope’s idea, she knew how stupid I was being around you and sent me over. I saw it and took the chance.”

“Fuck. Why?”

“Because I was pretty useless at being chivalrous the year before.”

You climbed off his lap in a scramble and sat on the seat beside him, mind racing, trying to figure out where the hell he was going with this.

He turned to you, trying to keep your attention as he stumbled over the words.

“You couldn't knock on the door, so I wanted to help you, but I didn't think I'd scare you so much you'd drop it.”

“You didn't scare me it was a momentary lapse in my observational skills.”

“You shrieked,” a smile threatened to pull his lips up, they twitched as you flushed red.

“And Halloween?” You looked at him again now, trying to figure out what the hell was going on between the two of you.

“You refused to look at me for a year after we stopped working together,” he shrugged quickly running a hand through his hair and expelling a breath. “I don’t really know how to talk to women.”

“You just know how to piss them off?”

“Morgan says it comes naturally.”

“Yeah, well, Morgan is very wise.”

A brief silence stretched between you, or as silent as a night full of cracks, pops, whizzes and bangs could be.

“I don't get it. You tried your best to get rid of me when I was there to help you. I wanted to impress you, and you kept sending me on meaningless errands, and now you're saying what? You wanted my attention?” There was a quiet anger to your voice, but you were surprised to find it diminished and tired.

“I wanted you gone because you were distracting me, Y/N, not because I hated you.”

“Well, what's the difference, Doctor Reid? Please indulge me.” You huffed a little but kept your eyes on him, trying not to seem too desperate for his answer.

“I have an IQ of 187. Emily says when I'm around a pretty girl it's more like 52,” he fidgeted with his pants, forcing the words out.

“You're a pretty girl. We had a case to work and all I could think about was how to get you to like me. Hotch chewed me out like three separate times for being absent minded.”

He was looking anywhere but you, trying his best not to appear like a fool but you were locked onto him.

“Oh my god you're an idiot.”

“When you're around, yes.”

“And that means I'm equally stupid.”

“No, you just jump to conclusions and hold grudges. There wasn't anything really that stupid about your actions, though it could be suggested that not thoroughly thinking through the wording of the conversation you overheard-”

You cut him off with a kiss, pulling him down again mlby his tie.

“Oh my god, shut up,” you whispered as you broke apart.

“Does that mean we can do this again? Because I'd like to do this again?”

“Stop talking, start kissing jackass.”

He finally didn't argue with that, pulling you back into him as you sat under the stars in his car welcoming the new year.

#spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #mgg #spencer reid smut #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fandom #spencer reid x reader smut #spencer reid x self insert #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid criminal minds #dr spencer reid #criminal minds smut #cm writing challenge

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amazingphil · 6 months

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DAN AND PHIL SHOP IS BACK FROM THE DEAD!

Did you hear the news?! The hiatus is over - after a disastrous funeral involving a sexy priest and some choking, DanAndPhilGAMES has returned to the world! And for this momentous occasion, Dan and Phil Shop has returned too with a limited edition piece:

The Back From The Dead Longsleeve

They have risen! Celebrate DPG returning to life with this metal logo illustration longsleeve, perfect for spooky season or pretending Dan and Phil are an obscure metal band your friends haven't heard of.

To strangers, you'll just appear a cool person who likes edgy illustration, but those who spy the haircuts amongst the exposed brains and ribs will know - you were there when the hiatus ended.

This shirt is a limited print run and when it's gone it's gone, so grab one as soon as you can to mark the moment! UK, EU and Worldwide shoppers can get it from danandphilshop.com or for the USA us.danandphilshop.com

We want to thank everyone so much for all the excitement around the channel's return! You never know what will happen on YouTube after 5 years with all that "aLgOrItHm", so to see these first uploads bringing joy to so many people warms our hearts, or partially revives Dan's dead one.

Look forward to all the fun stuff on DanAndPhilGAMES, from Sims to Spooky Week and even some surprises you may not expect for this channel! We promise not to accidentally make the merch shop look like a dramatic funeral like the YouTube channel again.

BYE - Dan and Phil

#dan and phil #dan #phil #danandphilgames

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neil-gaiman · 8 months

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hi neil, i hope your day was better than mine.

i got my hair cut today and i can't stop crying about it. it looks so bad. and it's right before school starts too. i'm not exaggerating when i say it looks like a 5 year old took scissors to my hair while i was sleeping. and it was done by a professional at a good salon! i don't know what happened but i'm devastated and maybe i'm just emotional/sentimental but i keep crying about it and i feel silly after because i know it's just HAIR.

anyways, you probably won't see this but i had to let someone know. and also, i think you would be proud of me because i have been in a reading slump for a year and last week i decided to do something about it. so i read coraline one day, ocean at the end of the lane the next, the graveyard book after, and lastly i took two days to read anansi boys. i'm planning on reading american gods next. the idea was to start off short and small and work my way up and i think it's working. thank you for your work and please never stop writing. and great job on season two by the way, it was beautiful.

please come to wisconsin soon so you're able to sign my good omens copy!

with love, ollie

Here. I will try to cheer you up with me in October 2016 as Hurricane Matthew is hitting Florida and I have just had a very strange haircut from the only barber who hadn't closed because of the incoming hurricane. The wind noise in the background is the start of the hurricane. The haircut was because I thought we'd lose power and I might have to fight zombies and shorter hair would help. To add insult to the haircut, it had a ducktail at the back.

The khaki jacket had lots of pockets and was hurricane gear too. (I slept in the bathtub that night. The howls of the wind got loud but I didn't lose power and I was fine.)

And it still wasn't as bad a haircut as the one I got when I was 16 when my dad took the hairdresser aside before the haircut and told him that whatever I asked for, what he was to do was cut it all off and give me a short back and sides. And he did. There are no photographs.

I hope this helps. I'm proud of you too.

#bad hair days

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sigmalaussene · 2 months

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Top ten weird ways Oswald Cobbepot gets called in Gotham

As I was rewatching Gotham, I decided to write down every name that people in the show canonically call Oswald Cobblepot aka the Penguin. It was a wild ride. Please enjoy

10. "Funny looking fellow"

(season one)

We start with a simple one. This isn't even an insult, it's just a fact. He is, indeed, a funny looking fellow. I'm pretty sure they say it more than once too.

9. "The Dapper Gangland Kingpin"

(season two)

This one it's just silly, especially since it was written on a newspaper. Just... that's weird ? Idk it's silly it makes me chuckle

8. "Yellow rat snitch"

(season one)

We start getting a little weirder. Why a rat? And, more importantly, why yellow???

7. "Stupid lame birdbrain"

(season four)

Just so mean. Especially since this scene it's his dumb husband making a room full of people chant it

6. "Golden goose"

(season one)

Right back to season one and it's incredible dialogue. This one is particularly amazing thanks to Oswald's reply to it, which was, of course: "Honk honk". I can't even start to describe that scene. It's a classic.

5. "Beaky nosed freak"

(season five)

Definitely the best nickname the last season had to offer. Like, you know that moment when a guy kills your bestfriend/girlfriend and you call him the silliest name you can think of? This is one of those times.

4. "Scaley faced bitch"

(season one)

This is the first one in the show, directly from the first episode. I am a firm supporter of calling men bitches when they deserve it, and he did, so I wholeheartedly approve this message. Adding the scaley face part just makes it more poetic.

3. "Sad little breadhead"

(season two)

This one from never fails. Imagine it delivered with the most condicending tone in the world. Just amazing. Makes me laugh every time.

2. "Fruitcake leprechaun"

(season two)

This. This is the one that started it all. It was thinking about this one that I decided that this rewatch I was gonna write down all the nicknames. I dont know if it has something to do with english not being my first language, so I don't have the background of the word "fruitcake" used as an homophobic remark, but this name is one of the funniest things I have ever heard in my life.

1. "Limping little chickenbutt second banana"

(season one)

This couldn't not be on the first place. I am obsessed with the writers of this show, i want to get inside their brains. Because like what does it mean? How did they come up with this? I need to know every thought that crossed their mind for them to write this. This is art. This is poetry. Incredible. Amazing. Absolutely insane. Kudos to the actor who played Maroni because if they gave me that line I wouldn't be able to say it with a straight face.

Bonus:

(For the fans, he is also called "the only thing Nygma cares about". Just... you know, in case you forgot)

Some recurrent nicknames are: "Pengy", "Ozzie", "freak", "cockroach", "punk", bird related names (bird/birdman, feathered friend, chicken, turkey...) and "little"/"tiny" followed by almost anything (man, friend, dirtbag, bastard, creep, twerp, freak, weasel...)

Edit: i realize i didn't mention "Major Crumblepot" and that's on me sorry guys

His haircut is described as "disco vampire hair" at one point (another classic)

He is also called "specimen", which is really funny, and "dewdropper"?? for some reason I don't remember but it was in my notes and I couldn't ignore it lmao

#ofc “penguin” is implied #i finished my latest rewatch!!! ajsnakak i love this little silly guy so much AND i made my brother love him too YAY #gotham oswald #oswald copplepot #ed nygma #nygmobblepot #gotham #riddlebird #gotham fox #show #tv show #top ten #top ten weird ways oswald cobblepot gets called #gotham fandom #scaley faced bitch <3 #fandom meme #gotham meme

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waywardmillennial · 12 days

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the new Watcher logo is full of easter eggs and I'm going to attempt to point out all of the images I saw, what they most likely reference, and how this means we'll get a Weird Wonderful s3!*

logs from Too Many Spirits

the (red) phone from Ghost Files

berry for the Berry Boys one-off

and is that Shakespeare?? the haircut looks like Billy Shakes

(Weird Wonderful World reference count: 1)

a plane, phone again, house, and passport??

hard to tell if the plane and house are general references or not. could be for an upcoming show. they do investigate houses on GF and there was the travel season of TMS, which could be why the passport

- Ghost Files logo (hi Gilbert!) - cheez balls from the foundation of Watcher aww<3 - jar of peanut butter - Mystery Files logo

then: windmill, jack-o-lantern, cloche, ostrich

the pumpkin has me stumped. maybe Spooky Small Talk? or love of spooky vibes in general and the cloche could be for Dish Granted, it could be for Steven's upcoming show. maybe all his food content in general. the windmill and ostrich are both from WWW - Solvang ep (WWW reference count: 3)

globe with plane: that one season of TMS or unknown/upcoming show

cocktails: either TMS or Worth a Shot (but I lean towards TMS)

the (OG) Professor!

meteor puppet from PH

roller blades from WWW Derby ep

walkie talkie from GF

(WWW reference count: 4)

jellybeans (ngl I thought potatoes at first)

maglite from GF

skull (not too sure)

bottle of soda from WWW Pop Pals?

(WWW reference count: 5)

just before the logo transitions out we get:

genie lamp!

Mystery Files projector

Overall that's five references to a show that's currently retired....hmmmm

*this is just my hope but I have been known to have the gift of Apollo at times

thank you Jared for the new logo! we love it!!

#watcher #watcher spoilers #watcher logo #watcherinas #comment the ones I missed #WWW S3 PLEASE 🕯️🕯️🕯️#I'm gonna need new glasses and carpal tunnel surgery after today let me tell you

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darklinaforever · 2 months

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I am convinced that there must be a story between Lilith and Eve, and probably even an identity exchange between the latter at certain times. Why, how, and when, I don't know, but I am convinced that in all cases, there was an exchange !

Here are the official character cards from the hazbin hotel games :

Lilith's seems quite strange. First, the card supposed to represent Lilith does not contain the name Morningstar compared to her daughter and her husband. Of course, this may seem like a simple little detail, but I am convinced that it is not insignificant.

Second, Lilith's haircut and figure (or at least assumed Lilith...), not to mention the smile she displays, are much more similar to the depiction of Eve in the introduction to Hazbin Hotel than to that of Lilith.

And on top of that, a crucial detail, Lilith's face is absent (even though we know it very well, a strange choice), beckoning as if to keep a secret. And once again, she has almost the same smile as Eve in the introduction to Hazbin Hotel and just like Eve, her face is absent. And when else is Lilith's face missing in Hazbin Hotel ? Episode 5, absolutely.

And removing Lilith's face doesn't really make sense, since once again we know it and we even see it in the episode through numerous portraits. Well, it doesn't really make sense, unless it's to point out that something is wrong with her. And once again, the silhouette looks much more like that of Eve than of Lilith.

All this may seem trivial but I am convinced once again that it is not ! To drive the point home, the Hazbin Hotel Twitter account published a photo showing us a little better the two portraits that we were able to see in episode 5 located in Lucifer's office, with a message explicitly saying that the devil is in the details and to look a little closer at the two portraits of the Morningstar family.

And what can we learn from these two paintings concerning Lilith ? She has her eyes open to one, but not to the other (I will also add that we do not see Lilith's eyes in the beach scene, since they are camouflaged by sunglasses). She is very close to her family on one and more withdrawn on the other. She wears her wedding ring on her left hand on one and her left hand is not visible on the other. Another small detail being that Lilith's left hand was also not visible during the flashback of episode 5.

Probably many will think I'm crazy, but I'm convinced that whatever is happening with Lilith, it must have something to do with Eve and that they must have swapped places probably several times for various reasons. Maybe it's not really Lilith we saw at the end of season 1, who knows. But even if it's her, there must be a reason she's here. I doubt that she simply abandoned her husband and daughter overnight to become the real big bad as many theorize. After all, Lilith has literally been with Lucifer since their fall to Hell and lived a family life with him and a visibly happy Charlie from the portraits. So it probably stayed for thousands of years before suddenly mysteriously disappearing for seven years. Also, all this crazy stuff that a lot of people have saying that Lilith is bad because she kept Charlie away from Lucifer… from the portraits it looks like bullshit. Lucifer obviously had his own insecurities regarding his daughter, no point blaming Lilith for that. Especially since, regardless of whether it was Lilith or Eve in the flashback of episode 5, she simply seemed to bring Charlie back to bed damn it ! Don’t hesitate to give me your opinions in comments !

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wheelerpilled · 3 months

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'forced conformity is killing the kids'

Mike Wheeler ST5 Theory/analysis

So we've all seen the new BTS of Finn Wolfhard on the set of Stranger Things dropped and OH MY GOD. THE DUALITY FROM LAST SEASON.

I have to TRY write about it ATLEAST...because wow I have a lot of potential thoughts, sorry it's once again unstructured, messy, and repetitive but stay with me please!!!!!!!!!!

I've seen ALOT of people happy we're getting s1-2 Mike hair back but guys .....it's not a good thing!!!!!!!!!! Mike is going THROUGH IT.

______________________________________________

In Season 4 it's acknowledged that Mike is finally coming into his own a bit, Eddie says he was wearing 'whatever his mom bought him' when he first came to highschool, but in episode 1 when we see him for the first time in S4, he's clearly been influenced by Eddie and has figured out what style he likes and what he's interested in, he's in a DND club, he's comfortable being known as an uncool nerd, he's growing his hair out (yes I DO believe it's because he idolised Eddie, I have more to say about that in a second)

basically: his hair and his outfits, aswell as pretty much the way he acts in Hawkins (NOT California- he goes back to pretending to be something else) in S4 represents the ideology non-conformity and his sense freedom in this new persona

he doesn't feel lost in highschool anymore, he's doing what he likes with his friends (DnD) and he's proudly wearing his hellfire shirt around school/Hawkins, basically, he's accepting that it's okay to enjoy 'different' things that aren't considered the norm, and it makes him happy, he feels comfortable!

_____________________________________________

But now in Season 5, from the pictures we've seen, it looks like he's fully reverted back into his shell, I guess I understand why tbh I don't blame him:

he comes back to Hawkins after everything and everyone believes he's in a satanic cult- townspeople probably treat him badly and Jason's team mates probably blame Eddie and the rest of hellfire for Jason's 'disappearance' (death). They directly connect him with all the horrible things that have happened to Hawkins as of late

...which is probably what the BTS of them walking towards Mike are about, they probably keep harassing him no matter how he acts and Mike just wants them to leave him alone, let's face it:

High school has probably gone full circle back to middle school for Mike and he's getting bullied/mistreated again. So he feels his only option is to remove himself from Hellfire and become 'normal'.

Hellfire might maybe even be blamed for the gates being opened. Last we heard, the townspeople were hunting down Eddie and the rest of hellfire, and the graffiti on Eddie's grave in the S5 pics shows that he's still very much hated.

Mike probably got harassed by multiple people who don't believe Eddie's dead, or believe Mike was in on it and are out looking for him, or think Hellfire contributed to some satanic ritual causing the 'earthquake' and thus Mike is also a target and it's dangerous for him.

So I think part of the style change and haircut is due to THAT, he doesn't wear his hellfire shirt anymore because he doesn't want any affiliation with the club.

As Finn Wolfhard has said in previous interviews 'mikes just trying to act as normal as possible' so by seperating himself from Eddie/Hellfire and becoming more conventionally 'normal' he won't be treated like an outcast.

He won't be assaulted, bullied, blamed, or worse if he conforms. He has a greater chance of everything becoming better/easier while living in Hawkins if he does this, he might have even given up DnD aswell- so yeah he's gonna be pretty MISERABLE in season 5

___________________________________________

Alot of people wanted to see his reaction to Eddie's death, I think we'll definitely be seeing the lingering after effects of it, and alot of Mike's arc will kick off because of the aftermath of the vilification of Hellfire.

Only few people know that Eddie died to try protect Hawkins, Eddie was a role model for Dustin and Mike, but they're grieving him in COMPLETELY different ways

Dustin decides to honour him by taking up a similar style and proudly wearing his hellfire shirt, and is also probably trying to sway the town's opinion on Eddie and prove him innocent.

....But Mike seemingly decides that he DOESNT want to end up like Eddie anymore: dead and hated, known as a satanic freak.

Someone he idolised is now deceased, he doesn't know how to properly handle that fact, it's intimidating that someone he looked up to do much could be so hated, and in turn has caused the reaction from Mike that is basically 'if my idol is treated as such a horrible outcast, and I wanted to follow in his footsteps, where would that leave me?' he's feeling lost and hopeless, especially with the state Hawkins is in, so he probably decides the best thing to do is just blend in. Be normal.

It probably scares him that even merely his interest in DnD and all these other factors immediately make him a target, as far as townspeople believe- Mike is one of the kids who was close with a brutal serial killer, they probably think he's just as 'messed up as Eddie the freak was' for staying friends with someone who'd do such horrible things

I think Mike just wants to hide as much as he can right now, he has ALOT on his plate and doesn't need the rest of the town out to get him.

so if anyone asks: he'll probably say things like 'I didn't really know Eddie! I would never join a cult like that, I didn't know!' or something to try seperate his name from the hellfire club.

Mike will end up picking protecting himself and hiding his true identity and values/traits rather then living exposed and vulnerable; yet true to what he actually believes is right....And that is the opposite of what Dustin is doing,

Dustin is a proud hellfire member and friend of Eddie, he's picking what he thinks is right over self-preservation from the town, he's still wearing his battered shirt, now HE'S the one growing his hair out, he still adores Eddie and misses him (so does Mike probably, but he feels he CANT outwardly publicly show support or stand up for him)

I do wonder if this will cause some sort of tension between Dustin and Mike, because Dustin is doing the opposite and becoming more like Eddie instead of distancing himself from the hellfire name, he might feel betrayed that Mike 'gave up' on Hellfire, and maybe accuse him of not even caring about Eddie or his death?? Idk!!!!!!!!!! I feel like Dustin will also be going through it this season 😭😭😭

_____________________________________________

I do also think Mike will try to be clinging alot to El this season (I mean, before they inevitably break up which I believe will probably happen kinda early on if it actually happens at all)

this is also because just the idea of having a girlfriend corresponds to his idea of conformity and being 'normal'. He just wants to be a normal guy, his life is nothing out for the ordinary, he's not interested in satanic things like dnd and hellfire, he's just a normal person. A normal person who is PROBABLY a target of Vecna in season 5 😓

I believe his arc for this season will be trying to breakout of these notions of conformity in exchange for things he actually likes and is interested in, we saw him sort of branching out in season 4, but I think THIS time it's happening for real, and he'll end up fully embracing his own views and interests after some sort of emotional arc-which will also probably be part of the M*lev*n break up (not censored because I'm against them/hate them I just don't wanna clog the tag for others 😭😭) OR set off by the breakup

Throughout season 1 he was told he liked El, or others assumed it, so I think he assumed it aswell, they just never broke up because El ALSO thinks having a boyfriend is normal and expected, and because Mike was the boy she was closest to she assumed it was romantic feelings (and he kissed her in S1 which probably contributed to her assuming they were romantic feelings)

Alot of the people around her are also in relationships, and she watched alot of TV with happy romantic couples so she thinks it's more normal to HAVE a boyfriend then to NOT have one, I think Mike and El kinda stayed together because they think they're SUPPOSED to by these social standards,

They obviously care about each other alot, and mistook it as reasons to just stay together, she wants to be a normal girl because only being a superhero isnt good for her, she needs to be 'Jane Hopper' and not '011'. I do think she definitely needs to be single for awhile and find herself, even if her and Mike are to be endgame, she NEEDS at least some time to gain some experiences outside of living her life as a superhero, (Mike also needs character development outside of being 'Els Boyfriend's)

Which is why it was vital that her time with max in S3 existed, so El could realise her value and that there is a life outside having a boyfriend- I think Mike needs a similar moment aswell, a wake-up call of sorts where he can take a step back and consider maybe rather than letting society dictate his actions, he makes decisions for what he wants for himself ('we make our own rules')

_____________________________________________

If m*lev*n is endgame then sure that's great for them, but I genuinely don't know what big character arc could be in store for Mike that doesn't involve a breakup and themes of non-conforming, it doesn't even have to involve Byler endgame at all (although I AM a byler truther)

I think Mike learning that it's okay to let go of that romantic relationship if he doesn't feel that way anymore is a big step for his character, or atleast taking a break so he can work on himself, anything along those lines of actual development on himself rather then on his relationship- El and Mike have been romantically paired from the start, he needs to learn that it's OKAY to breakup with someone if thats what he feels is right, (side note: I DO believe El would/will be the one to breakup with him 😭)

I don't think he realises that he'll be able to stay friends with El, it's not 'shes my girlfriend or else she'll hate me for breaking up with her. No other options'

he doesn't want to lose her because he cares about her but he can't find a way to balance that romantic relationship alongside his other friendships. So I think for his character to develop they have to breakup, even temporarily, but obviously that's only my opinion if M*lev*n is endgame then oh well, it's endgame, but I think they would be a really awesome platonic duo and I'd like their relationship alot more if it was that way

______________________________________________

I think later in the season he'll realise that living this way not actually what he wants, and he doesn't want to give up who he is, or pretend to be something he's not- because he IS a nerd who likes DnD, and he does support Eddie, he cared alot about him because he idolised him, and i think season 5 is about him learning that that's okay and he doesn't have to feel so much pressure to conform by societal standards, bro needs a better grief process, forced conformity GOT HIS ASS 😭😭😭

What I'm trying to say is: all of this, and his new look is a safety net of sorts, he's still pretending to be something he's not because he feels he HAS to, otherwise it's dangerous for him in Hawkins because of hellfires reputation, but he's also acting this way because of other factors that I haven't really thought through yet LMAO

I believe season 5 will probably be him accepting those things about himself and embracing it, maybe also undoing his emotional repression along the way, I guess I would describe it as coming of age and I think if it's handled well it could be really beautiful in a way

OH MY GOD I RAMBLED SO MUCH AND IT ISNT EVEN A SOLID THEORY JUST A COLLECTION OF THOUGHTS😭

Sorry that was long and repetitive but uhhhhhhhhhhhh yeah..........anyways Mike Wheeler ily keep ur head up king please don't die in S5‼️‼️ stay safe‼️‼️

#PLEASE READ AND STAY WITH ME IK ITS LONG 😭😭😭#stranger things #mike wheeler #stranger things 5 #st5 #jane hopper #eleven hopper #el hopper #byler #st analysis #finn wolfhard #will byers #eddie munson

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larphis · 7 months

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!MAJOR OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH SEASON 2 REUNION SPOILERS AHEAD!

Okay so I don‘t know who needs to hear this but guys. I’ve cracked the code:

So as we all know this is a photo from the offical Warner Bros Press Release that says that it was taken from the second episode, right?

Now I want you all to look at the outfit.

In this VERY SAME episode we will have: the Lucius reunion. Don’t believe me based on this speculative piece of evidence? Just wait. There’s more.

In the same episode, they try to get on board of the Revenge.

And after Black Pete says he doesn’t feel like shooting the arrow for the improv zip line they sent sent Buttons.

But who is that covering up Buttons with his head and standing next to Black Pete? That’s right: Lucius

BUT THAT’S STILL NOT EVERYTHING.

The beard, the haircut, the outfit… Stede is having another gay on gay therapy session with Lucius before they execute the plan to enter the Revenge.

And well guess what? Guess what also happens in the SECOND (!) episode of this season?

Once they get on board… Ed and Stede reunite.

So let me recap this: We were all so scared that they would take 5 episodes to even see each other again but guess what? 2 episodes. 2 episodes until the crew of the Revenge is properly reunited.

(Of course that still leaves the storm that will probably happen that very next day and seperate them once more to leave us with some unresolved tension, but still. PROGRESS. So much progress already in two (2) episodes)

#ofmd #our flag means death #our flag means death theory #ofmd theory #ofmd season 2 #ofmd season 2 trailer #ofmd spoiler #ofmd speculation #ofmd s2 spoilers #gentlebeard reunion #gentlebeard #lucius is alive #lucius spriggs #Edward teach #Blackbonnet #ofmd s2 e2

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occudo · 1 year

Note

your season one Jon is the most season one Jon he could be, but what does your season 5 look like?

I'm team 'Jon got a haircut before the apocalypse started'

#tma fanart #jonathan sims #occudo's art

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skitskatdacat63 · 6 months

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2009 Reference Guide to Seb's Hair(Long post w lots of pics):

I would rate these but I love every version of him too much so I cannot pick 🤭, I'll add some commentary though. This took a horrible amount of time but it was also a great excuse to download and show off a truly terrible amnt of Seb pics(I was in tears half the time bcs of cuteness agression)

0. Testing(Jerez)(February 10th-12th):

Honestly such perfect Seb hair, I find this soooo cute!!! His hair is honestly always so perfect at Jerez testing every season. I love the length and style, he looks so incredibly pretty <3

1. Australia(March 26th-29th):

And now he is...bald. I actually kinda love this hair, he's my little kiwi fruit!! But I also can't help but mourn the Jerez hair. I'm just like: why did you feel the need to go bald, Seb??? It makes him look so young!

2. Malaysia(April 2nd-5th):

3. China(April 16th-19th):

I think the highlight of his bald era is how much he embodies the nickname "sunshine." Like the way his hair and eylashes glow in the sun??? Literally sunshine. Also it's cute to see his hair grow more fluffy

4. Bahrain(April 23rd-26th):

The texture differences are so interesting, I think this length looks its best when it's more fluffy like in the top right pic.

5. Spain(May 7th-10th):

It's funny how his hairline does that point in the middle, again: looks better when he looks unkempt

6. Monaco(May 21st-24th):

Weirdly shocked at how much his hair grew in-between Spain and Monaco??? Also I forgot that those fashion pics were from this weekend, and I was jumpscared by his mohawk look. I think he should keep away from hair product hahaha

7. Turkey(June 4th-7th):

Lego hair looking ass. Kidding kidding, just think his hair looks best all natural

8. Silverstone(June 18th-21st):

Lowkey kinda baffling to me how different his hair looks at different stages of the weekend. The podium hair especially is just soooo different, its very cute but yeah idk

9. Germany(July 9th-12th):

I did not realize he cut his hair again during this season?? Seeing these was very surprising to me, I had thought he grew it out for the entire season but I guess not! But I guess if he hadn't gotten a haircut the entire season, he'd probably have his angelic curls of 2010 by the end

10. Hungary(July 23rd-26th):

Kinda love the looks he was serving this weekend, it's just very spikey and cute(also the cunty sunglasses!!

11. Valencia(August 20th-23rd):

12. Belgium(August 27th-30th):

That garage lighting makes his hair look soooo much more yellow rather than his fair blond in the sunlight

13. Italy(September 10th-13th):

This transitional growing period is not my fav, just the way his hair sweeps in is funny

14. Singapore(September 24th-27th):

Looking particularly blond this weekend!! His hair is just very light and pretty

15. Japan(October 1st-4th):

I think most of these are from post-quali and for good reason; I love the way it looks like he has highlights in all the bottom pics

16. Brazil(October 15th-18th):

I love his scruffiness from this weekend!!! The scruffy stubble is sooooooo!!!

17. Abu Dhabi(October 29th-November 1st):

Pretty cute I think but yeah like nothing can really compete with his hair length in 2010 for me so I look at these and I'm like, ooooo growing longer!!

Conclusion: I think it's fun to get to see the process of someone's hair growing out. I've noticed that a lot of men with short hair get very consistent haircuts to keep their hair generally the same length, and I think that's so boring!! I think it's great to grow out your hair for a few months time because you get to see yourself at all the different stages and experiment with all kinds of different looks! So yeah, props to Seb for serving all kinds of looks this season!!

Also it's always interesting to me how much hair length/style and facial hair can change a person's look, but particularly how old/young they look. Like when he shaved his his head, it made him look so young. But in Brazil for example, with the longer hair and scruffy facial hair, he def looks older!

And of course, let me know which you like the best :D My favorite is Jerez <3

#i need a tag for posts like these which is just:#normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion(not deranged)#this is mainly just ref for me #and for people like me who feel the urge to be ultra specific in everything they create #hope this was interesting for people who are not just me!!#i love how I originally foolishy tried to make this in one night. so naive.....#okay anyways posts i wanna make in this same vein:#more seb hair guides obv(guys idk if you knew but im very normal abt his hair)#id like to try and categorize all his 2009 and 2010(and before) helmets since theyre not on his website and i love them a lot #this would take a horrendous amnt of time but id love to try and make a guide of all nando's facial hair(hes had so many wild ones okay)#and then i wanna rate all the rbr race suits bcs i think about them *so often* and i have many thoughts #sebastian vettel #sv5 #f1 #formula 1 #formula one #catie.rambling.txt #we do a little bit of f1 #normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion

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safarigirlsp · 5 months

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40 LOOKS DAMN GOOD

I saw this on Twitter and thought it'd be fun to do here as a mini celebration. Interaction has been so dead on here for everyone, it'd be fun to liven it back up! Everyone feel free to play along!

Favorite Movie(s)

The Last Duel! I love that movie. Blackkklansman is the runner up.

I actually don't care for most of his other movies at all in terms of the movie itself. 65, The Report, and Logan Lucky were decent, but definitely second tier.

Favorite Character(s)

Jacques, Flip, and Mills

Favorite Co-Star(s)

Ben Affleck blows absolutely everyone else out of the water! "Come In! Take your pants off!"

Bill Murray and John David Washington are runners up, and I loved Jeremy Irons in Gucci.

Favorite Love Interest(s)

None so far! Rey and Hanna are my absolute least favorites. I hate them, honestly. Jodie Cromer was my favorite female lead in one of his movies. Lady Gaga and Marion Cottilard were alright too. I like Scarlett Johannson the best as a stand alone actress, but I hated her character in Marriage Story. I anticipate liking Aubrey Plaza

Favorite Scene(s)

Jousting and kicking ass are hard to beat!

Favorite Sex Scene(s)

All the scenes from Last Duel! I don't care how offensive that is!

This scene from The Man Who Killed Don Quixote.

Girls seasons 5 and 6 were hard to beat. The couch scene in season 5 is pretty nice.

Favorite SNL Skit(s)

Slow for obvious reasons.

Undercover Boss Part 2

Favorite Line(s)

Dream Role(s)

I got a Knight with Jacques and an Action Hero with Mills, both of which were high on my list. I'd love to see him as a Vampire, a Dark Victorian Gentleman, an Old West Gunfighter, an Adventurer, and a John Wick style Hitman or Action Hero.

Oh, and he needs to be his actual age and not have goddamn face prosthetics, altered hairlines, or terrible fucking haircuts!

Dream Co-Star(s)

Love Interests: Angelina Jolie, Kate Winslet, Margot Robbie, Ana De Armas, and Lily Rose Depp for size kink purposes.

Co-Stars: Another hot guy like Goran Visnjic or Gerard Butler. Keanu Reeves would also be a blast.

Directors: Ridley Scott (again), Clint Eastwood, Tim Burton, Robert Eggars, Quentin Tarantino.

Favorite Photoshoot(s)

Favorite Candid(s)

Favorite Red Carpet Appearance(s)

Venice takes the cake!

Favorite Interview(s)

"Fuck you. I don't know."

"I hated this. Goodbye."

Favorite Moment(s) of Your Choice

#my stuff!#favorite photoshoots #birthday bash #65 #kylo #flip #jacques #venice #gq #sexy beast

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thethirdromana · 1 year

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Kira's hairstyles throughout Deep Space Nine, rated

All screengrabs from Trekcore, all opinions from me.

As seen in season 1, episode 1: The Emissary.

A poor start with what I think might be the worst haircut on the list? Nana Visitor is all of 36 years old in this photo and she has the haircut of a granny. It also makes her face look very square, which it is not. 0/10.

As seen in season 2, episode 2: The Circle.

This is the first of the definitive Kira hairstyles and it definitely gets points for that, and many more for its butch energy. This is practical, this is kickass, this is a woman who can fight off a Cardassian invasion then put up some shelves without breaking a sweat. 7/10.

Also as seen in season 2, episode 2: The Circle.

I know this is basic of me but I really love the pixie cut. And I love the way that Kira is relaxing in a monastery at this point, in beautiful surroundings, and her whole look from her hair to her clothes has softened in response. 10/10.

As seen in season 2, episode 8: Necessary Evil.

I'm so conflicted about this one. On the one hand, I really like how it's been styled, especially in comparison to Dax's version of the same hairstyle, which looks uncomfortably stiff. On the other hand, Kira with long hair just doesn't seem right. 5/10.

As seen in season 3, episode 15: Destiny.

Another definitive Kira hairstyle, and probably the one that's most overtly masculine; this is a classic 1950s man's hairstyle, though somehow the overall effect is more femme than the brushed-back version. Mostly this is a hairstyle that doesn't take attention away from her face. 8/10.

As seen in season 4, episode 4: Indiscretion.

I'm not sure this is Kira's most flattering haircut, but I like the way that as she gradually becomes less angry and abrasive, and I suppose starts to work through some of her trauma from the Occupation, her hairstyles also become softer to match. 7/10 for character development.

As seen in season 7, episode 4: Take Me Out to the Holosuite.

This is my FAVOURITE of the longer-term Kira haircuts. Not just because it's pretty, but because the asymmetrical shape means that the whole effect is to draw your attention to her Bajoran earring. Her confidence and her pride shine through. 9/10.

As seen in season 7, episode 25: What You Leave Behind.

A serious hairstyle for a serious time. We've lost the fun full asymmetry of season 6 and early season 7 (which were also quite serious times, but never mind that). This is a surprisingly shapeless hairstyle for Kira. 4/10.

Because I was sad to end on a disappointing hairstyle, here's a bonus Nana Visitor:

This is the very cool hairstyle Kira went for post-canon, and you can't persuade me otherwise.

#star trek #deep space nine #ds9 #kira nerys #long post #this took ages so if you disagree please be nice about it

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alastair-1205 · 5 months

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You know what I'll never be over? The way Lloyd looks like his dad. Like in the earlier seasons Sensei G had the same haircut as Lloyd and in season 5 there's those last few episodes where Lloyd wears his dad's outfit.

But even beyond that, I think even Lloyd's newer design was made to look like how Garmadon looked when he was younger. Or Young Garmadon was made to look like Season 8 and onward Lloyd. Whichever came first lol. Even that new "Master Lloyd" outfit from one of the upcoming sets looks similar to Young Garmadon from those comic books I still need to read.

AND IT MAKES ME EMOTIONAL becasue for so long Lloyd was defined by his relationship with his dad and you can SEE how he truly is his father's son even if that fact is something that's been turned into something painful. Or maybe I'm just Never Normal about a parents relationship with their kid. Who knows.

#ninjago #lego ninjago #ninjago dragons rising #ninjago lloyd #lloyd garmadon #ninjago garmadon #sensei garmadon

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imagines--galore · 1 month

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||Mind Over Matter|| Part Thirteen

Summary: Evelyn is Penelope Garcia’s protégé. She is a tech wiz, and knows her way around any kind of security and just like her mentor knows how to dig deep and get into the past of anyone and has a knack for anything with a chip in it. Including potato chips. The one thing she fails at is figuring out is the mind and how it works.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Evelyn Richardson(OC)

Rating || Genres || Warnings: T+ Romance. Adventure. Family. Some language, blood and violence in later installments.

Previously - Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine, Part Ten, Part Eleven, Part Twelve

A/N: Well what do you know! Heres another chapter. Random moments happening in between episode really. And please lemme know what you think! Hope you enjoy this chapter!

Takes place during Season 2 Episodes 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 & 8

A low humming sound filled the air as Evelyn put away the last of her files, having gone through them already. They were the files for the Team's most recent case. And Evelyn was of course, in charge of putting them away. One of her minor duties as part of the BAU Team along with being assistant techie. A position that hadn't been randomly made up by her mentor. Stepping out of the room and locking the door behind her, she very nearly bumped into the figure that was rushing by. Rather she did bump into them and instantly started to apologize.

"I'm sorry, I didn't see where I was-"

"Evelyn? What're you doing down here?" The red head blinked, finally catching on who she'd bumped into.

"Spencer?" Her instant reaction was curiosity as she stared at her team member, trying to figure out what was new with him. Spencer stared back at her quizzically and questioningly, raising an eyebrow at her. Realization dawned and the red head grinned.

"You got a hair cut!" Instantly his hand went up to run his fingers through his hair, a nervous habit, Evelyn had noted long ago. "Yeah, I figured it was time to get a new look." The genius replied with a shrug. "So what're you doing here?" He asked, coming back to his previous question.

"I had to box away a few files." She responded with a small smile. "It is part of my job to clean after you guys." She added with a teasing tone, prompting him to smile back at her. Blue eyes flickered to his newly cut hair.

And unable to resist Evelyn reached out to gently run her fingers through the ends of his hair, having pushed herself up to the toes of her shoes so she could reach easily. The position pressed her a little close to him, but neither of them seemed to notice as she smiled at him. "I like it. You look cute."

Cute.

She'd just called him cute!

As if the realization of her words just hit her, Evelyn stepped back, cheeks flushing, a nervous smile playing at her lips as she avoided Spencer's gaze who only looked back at her which she found more cuter then his haircut. Like that of a confused puppy. The red head however did make the mistake of looking at him, and instantly regretted it as her heart sped up and her voice reached new levels of high pitch as she quickly managed to squeak out a goodbye before dashing past him, leaving a slightly confused Spencer, who was confused by her behavior to say the least, yet none the less pleased at her words.

Evelyn for her part avoided Spencer for the entire day.

Of course they were both back to discussing(arguing) over a new theory the very next day.

Though Evelyn still felt that strange warmth in her cheeks any time their eyes would accidentally meet and she would be reminded of the little run in a few days ago.

So embarrassing!

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JJ traced the tip of her finger along the rim of her coffee mug. She was sitting on a stool in a little café a few miles from the office and was waiting for Evelyn to show up. Said red head was making her way towards her friend, holding her own coffee mug and setting it on the small table between them, before hoping onto the stool as well. Outside rain splattered against the glass window of the café, the coldness of it seeping through the window, one that both women felt, yet neither minded. They had their coffees to help keep them warm.

"So how did the assignment go?" JJ asked, once she'd taken a small sip of her beverage.

Evelyn gave a small nod. "It went well. And that is all I can tell you." She said with a slightly pointed look to which JJ chuckled.

"Right! Top secret, I know." The red head gave a low chuckle, before taking a sip of her own drink, frowning as the steam from the coffee fogged up her glasses. Handing her friend a tissue with a smile of sympathy she watched as she wiped the glasses clean.

"So what was it you wanted to tell me?" JJ asked. Evelyn sighed before reaching into her bag and pulling out a magazine from her bag and placing it in front of the blonde. JJ pulled the magazine closer, frowning at the bold title that greeted her in big bold letters.

NEW YORK SOCIALITE EXPECTING.

"After five years of marriage." JJ glanced up at the red head sitting across from her, who had her lips pursed as she stared at the image of the smiling woman on the cover. Along with a man, who was obviously her husband, going by the way they had their arms wrapped around each other. JJ bit her bottom lip before she sighed and reached out to lay a hand atop Evelyn's in a gentle grip.

"I've tried everything I could JJ. But she still refuses to listen to me. Even Gideon has tried to help but she's just so stubborn." Evelyn sounded almost heartbroken as she spoke, finally raising her eyes to meet JJ's gaze.

"I don't know what I did to her JJ, but I wish there was some way I could find out." Her friend sighed.

"I know you're trying Evelyn, but sometimes one person's effort isn't enough. The other party has to put in some effort as well." The younger woman sighed before nodding. "I know, but I was just hoping if I did my best it would get something out of her."

Her gaze, which she now focused on JJ was desperate and hopeless. "Why are people so hard to figure out JJ?" The other woman sighed and shook her head, squeezing the hand she held.

"It's a good thing that we have the BAU then isn't it?" The small joke prompted a smile out of Evelyn. "I wish I could ask their help but I don't want this turning into a professional thing. Its why I've only ever talked to Gideon about it. Penelope doesn't know either, and she's my mentor."

JJ frowned. "Then why tell me?" Blue eyes blinked as they caught JJ's. "Because you asked." The response had a wry smile pulling at JJ's lips, which had Evelyn smiling back and shaking her head.

"I don't know JJ. I'm still surprised I even told you about all of it. But I'm glad I did. It doesn't seem as much of a burden as it did before." JJ smiled at the response. "And I will gladly help wherever and whenever I can."

The smile she was given, sent a surge of affection and protectiveness through the older woman. She understood what Morgan had meant when she spoke to him about Evelyn. There was something so….pure about the red head that a person wanted nothing more then to protect her. Or as Penelope said, wrap her up in a bubble sheet and store her away someplace safe.

"Now! On to other topics, is there anyone you're seeing these days?" The groan of dismal she was rewarded prompted her to laugh loudly, one which Evelyn joined in soon after.

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Morgan suddenly slammed his file shut a thought occurring to him. The motion caused Penelope to look away from her screen and frown at him. "What?" The blonde asked. Though he turned his head towards her, his eyes were still trained towards the floor, though they were unseeing.

"Have you ever realized that Reid and Evelyn have the same glass frames?" Penelope looked taken aback at the question. She opened her mouth to say something but then closed it as Morgan finally met her gaze and raised an eyebrow as if questioning her.

"Coincidence?" The blonde suggested, looking and feeling uncertain.

"More like unconscious retention?" The confused look had him explaining further. "Basically he picked them out unconsciously because he's seen Evelyn wear them all the time." Penelope frowned. "He sees me wearing glasses all the time." Her hand raised to touch the side of her own glasses which were a bright orange that day. Morgan nodded.

"Yeah, but you change them all the time. Evelyn never did." Penelope sighed before shrugging and turning back to her computers.

"Unconscious retention it is then." She muttered under her breath before starting to type away on her keyboard. Morgan went back to his own files, pushing the observation to the back of his head.

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Cupping her hands around the paper cup she watched it scrunch between her fingers. It was more out of worry and sadness then anything else.

"I take it you heard." Evelyn glanced up just in time to see Gideon take Spencer's unaccompanied desk chair and turn it towards her. The red head shrugged.

"More like saw." Both their gaze turned towards the desk that had been previously taken by Elle. It was completely clear now.

"Its for the best." Evelyn's gaze snapped to look at Gideon. "She knew she couldn't handle the pressure any longer." She only nodded in agreement her face grim.

"Still, doesn't make it any easier does it?" Her superior shook his head at her question.

"Leaving is never easy. Neither is letting go." At that he gave her a slightly pointed look which she countered with a sad smile.

"No. Its never easy."

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Hotch glanced up from where he had been signing up the last of his papers to see his wife enter the bullpen. Pushing Jack's pram in front of her. He frowned. Hailey was meant to take Jack to her mother's for the night so that the two of them could go on a date. Quickly standing up he met his wife midway as she walked to his office. "Hailey? Is everything alright?" He asked, once he'd greeted her hello and smiled at his son who made delighted sounds at the sight of his father.

His wife nodded. "Yes, only my mom won't be able to look after Jack for the night. She has a cold, and Jack might catch it." Hotch sighed at the news, looking disappointed. "Great, now what?" He grumbled to which his wife shrugged helplessly. "I called the babysitter, but she's out too." The night was getting better and better with each second.

"Agent Hotch! I managed to scrounge up those reports you asked for. Who in their right mind would file them under X instead of Y when clearly it's a Z and-oh hello Mrs Hotchner! I didn't see you there! Is everything alright?" The woman only ever came when there was something going on, and for a minute Evelyn's heart stopped out of terror. But then restarted once the older woman smiled at her.

"Everything is fine Evelyn. Aaron and I just hit a bit of a snag, since we can't go on our date." The red head frowned, even as Hotch pursed his lips, thinking of the reservations that he would have to cancel.

"Oh? Why is that?" Seemingly catching sight of Jack the red head was quick to move forward and wave at the baby, who seemed fixated on Evelyn's hair. "No babysitter." At the answer Evelyn shrugged.

"I can look after him for a few hours. I used to babysit around the neighborhood when I was a teen."

And that was how Evelyn found herself holding a baby in one arm, the other holding up two baby bags. She turned her head to look at Jack who was looking right back with a fistful of her hair in his chubby fingers.

"That went well didn't it?" The baby only responded with a giggle before proceeding to pull at her hair, making her wince.

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For once the Team had the chance to eat together in their little conference room. Chinese take out boxes were set atop the table while they all assembled chairs around it. "I love take out with you guys. Its always so much fun." Penelope said with a grin as she settled into her chair and reached for her box.

"Hey, where're the other three?" Morgan asked, glancing up from his box of chicken. Spencer shrugged through his mouthful of rice. JJ answered for him.

"Gideon had someplace to go, Hotch had a dinner date with Hailey, and Evelyn is-"

"And this is where your Daddy and the rest of the Team are briefed about the cases." The four of them stared as Evelyn entered the room with an inquisitive baby Jack, staring around with wide eyes. The woman holding him looked as if she'd been through some kind of storm that had knocked her glasses askew and her hair to be completely frizzy and her pony tail lopsided and barely holding up.

"Look Jack! Dinner! Excellent! Because I am starving!" So saying she dropped into a chair, and started to drop the two baby bags that were weighing her down onto the floor.

"Jesus! How much stuff does one baby need?" She grumbled to herself as she held Jack around the waist, having set him down on her thigh. The baby had his head turned to look up at her. Evelyn met his gaze and the two had an intense stare down. Which was broken when Evelyn made a face and the baby giggled loudly.

Morgan smirked. "Pint-size? Mind explaining what you're doing with Hotch's kid?" He asked the question that was on everyone's mind. Evelyn grunted as she picked up one of the bags and placed it on the table, doing her best to use only one hand while her other was occupied with keeping Jack secure.

"Babysitting Morgan. Something I happen to be good at. And Spencer? Help a girl out. I can't make his formula without some help." She'd already taken out the thermos with the water and the bottle which already had the formula in it. Jack was starting to fuss so she quickly stood up and cradling the baby to her chest starting to walk around while bouncing him a little. Spencer quickly stood up to do Evelyn's bidding, pouring the water into the bottle. JJ met Penelope's gaze and the two of them smiled at the sight of Spencer standing in front of Evelyn with the bottle in hand. She raised an eyebrow at him.

"Did you check the temperature of the bottle?" Spencer frowned. "No." The two of them were oblivious to the other three members of their team looking at them.

Evelyn sighed. "All those random facts and you didn't read about babies? Honestly Spence, what're you going to do when a case calls for a random baby fact?" She asked, her tone dry, wincing slightly as Jack pulled at her hair yet again.

"Just squeeze a bit out on your arm. If it burns, obviously we wouldn't give it to him." Rolling his eyes Spencer sighed before moving to unbutton his cuff and pulling up the sleeve. A few seconds later, little Jack was greedily drinking from his bottle while Evelyn cradled him, slowly walking around.

"Why don't you sit down honey?" Penelope said, pulling a chair next to her, if only to coo at the baby. Evelyn shook her head. "Can't. Hailey said he likes to drink while walking around."

"So much fuss over a baby." Spencer grumbled as he munched on a piece of carrot, prompting Evelyn to glare at him. "Oh, and aren't you particular about your eating habits Dr. Reid." She only ever called him that when she was especially ticked off. And Morgan had to say, seeing Evelyn jump to defend Jack was hilarious. Especially when Spencer pursed his lips in response, licking them before speaking.

"Aren't you?" The words had the red head glaring at him even more. "I'm not the one calling a baby out on his eating habits." Morgan laughed loudly. "Alright you two. Reid, leave them alone." The man chided earning a look of triumph from Evelyn who turned her attention back to the baby.

"Spencer is just being mean Jack, don't mind him." Of course, Spencer had to ruin her little bubble.

"I doubt he understands you Evelyn." This time it was JJ who chuckled reaching out to pat his shoulder in a reassuring manner. "Let it go Reid. I know you're jealous, but you'll have Evelyn's undivided attention soon enough." The words only reached Reid's ears who turned to stare at his friend, cheeks flushed and mouth agape.

"Why would I be jealous?" He managed to say quietly, despite having the urge to shout the words in surprise. JJ only gave him an amused look before she turned her attention back to her food. Reid glanced at Evelyn, who was now setting the baby on the floor after spreading a small blanket and placing his various toys around him to play with while sneaking in bites of food for herself here and there. "I was just teasing Spence." The blonde beside him spoke up, knowing he would most likely beat himself black and blue trying to find out why JJ would think he was jealous, when he wasn't.

After eating the four of them left to finish up their tasks for the night. While getting ready to go home, Spencer realized he'd forgotten his bag in the conference room. Quickly walking in he very nearly missed the sight of Evelyn and Jack on the floor. Jack was sound asleep, laid out on his back, one hand still clutching his toy. Evelyn was curled around the baby in what Spencer could only describe as a protective manner. She was asleep as well, her hair falling over her face, her glasses placed beside her head. She'd shed her cardigan to drape it over Jack so he wouldn't get cold and she was on the floor while Jack was on the blanket.

Spencer didn't know how long he stood there. Simply watching the two of them sleep. It was strange how the simple sight of Evelyn sleeping so peacefully had him feeling peaceful and somewhat calm. The notion had him frowning in confusion, yet he still didn't walk away. Not until Hotch arrived with his wife after their night out and the scene was disturbed by Hailey waking up Evelyn. At Hotch's questioning look he simply held up his bag and left without glancing at Evelyn, trying to ignore the flush on his cheeks and the calmness that stayed with him every time he'd think of his red haired friend.

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Tag List - @cillsnostalgia @kathaaaaaaa @lovelyygirl8

#spencer reid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x oc #spencer x oc #spencer reid x reader #dr spencer reid x reader #dr spencer reid x oc #dr spencer reid x y/n #criminal minds imagine #Criminal Minds

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