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#the losers fic
ghostbsuter · 17 days
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It's not.like he wanted to be here, Jesus.
Not that he'd leave either knowing where they are right now— mind you.
"And who is this, Cap?" Shazam screaming child gives a strained smile, back straight and answers.
"My colleague–"
Danny interrupts, face finally away from the glass that separates him and space. "Shazam over here got grounded by mom, and since he had a JL meeting, I was to come along as supervision."
Batman is eerily still, staring at them.
Poor Billy, he's gonna deal with this alone next time.
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rxmye · 4 days
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" 𝐈 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 "
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𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐔𝐁𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐉𝐎𝐂𝐊 — a confident athlete who turns into pathetic putty at the thought of you . . .
nsfw / sixteen + content / smut / gender neutral reader / yandere content / sub!yandere / masturbation / pervert yandere (he literally breaks into the locker room for your shit) / olfactophilia/osmolagnia (scent/smell kink) / dacryphilia (kink for crying) / breath play / yandere oc x reader
masterlist | requesting rules | character info . . . a/n: haven't wrote smut in awhile, so im a bit rusty . . .
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Lucas dangled the keys in his hands, a grin playing on his face as he walked towards the locker room—using the key to unlock the door—it was pretty easy grabbing the keys from the janitor's room, not that this school was particularly secure with their locks. It would be pretty easy breaking in, if he tried hard enough . . 
Lucas scanned the area, looking through each locker trying to find which one was yours . . he had your lock combination memorized, though he did get a little help from a friend in order to figure it out.
His hands reached for the clothes that you had left in your locker, lifting it up to his face, eyes going half lidded as he inhaled your intoxicating scent, he felt his face growing warm and his body growing weak. Lucas leaned down onto the lockers for support, almost losing balance as he slid down onto the floor.
Lucas pressed the flimsy piece of clothing further onto his face, engulfing himself in your smell—so much so that he could almost taste you—all the while his other hand travelled downwards, clumsily unbuckling his pants in a hurry . . hasty movements contradicted his rational mind, not bothering to care if he'd get caught.
He slid his pants down, just enough to reveal his semi-hard cock—a soft whine escaped him at the feeling of the cold air—his free hand now teasing his tip, as he relaxed his body, closing his eyes shut . .—imagining how disgusted you'd be seeing him in this pitiful state— . . that really turned him on, he cussed under his breath at how pitiful and pathetic his thoughts were . .
Lucas wrapped his hand around the base of his cock, slowly moving his hand up and down—his vision growing hazy—as he let out breathy sighs of pleasure—whines growing louder when he moved his hand faster.
Lucas stuffed the clothing he took, and pushed it into his mouth—drool escaped the corners of his mouth—blocking his ability make a sound, as he moved his hand faster around his cock—little tear droplets stinging his eyes, as he felt his legs shake slightly at the sheer pleasure—he used his now free hand to pinch his nose, closing his only source of air . . .
All he could taste was you, the clothing taking away all the moisture in his mouth, as tears begin to escape his eyes, saliva escaping the corners of his mouth, dripping onto his clothing—his legs began to convulse—his back arching slightly, as he finally came, all over the floor . . .
Lucas spat out the fabric, "fuck", the bell rang . . How is he gonna clean up this mess fast enough? . .
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@ rxmye , do not repost, plagiarize, translate, or adapt my work/theme without prior permission and or confirmation.
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too-deviant · 1 month
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freaky friday
OR… that one time you woke up in luke castellan’s body, told from the perspective of percy jackson.
Pairing: Luke Castellan x Fem!Demeter!Reader
Word Count: 4.2k
Content: the most loser loser!luke has ever loser-ed. this is sooo unserious like pls.
꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷
Percy Jackson had only been at camp for a day, but he was completely sure that something was wrong. 
It started early Sunday morning — well, when he thought back on it, he guessed it might have started late Saturday night, when he woke up to a few of the older campers (Luke included) sneaking off out of the cabin and not coming back until the sun was peeking through the horizon. 
But he didn’t really think about it until Sunday morning — when the thing that startled him out of sleep was a loud shout of  “Holy Fuck!” echoing from the bathroom. He sat up, startled, and eyed the door along with everyone else. Then there was a yelp. 
“Oh my gods. No — this is, this isn’t real. Am I still — oh don’t touch that. That’s not yours. Jesus, Luke — No. Stop looking. Oh my gods.” 
A few campers shared some wary glances, asking the silent question of who’s going to investigate? Eventually, Chris (Percy thought, one of Luke’s friends from yesterday), stood up with a sigh and a raised brow, stepping over sleeping bags until he stood outside of the door. He looked at them all, the curious eyes of literally every kid there, and knocked slightly. There was another yelp. 
“Uh…” Chris blew out a puff of air, “Are you okay in there?” 
A few seconds of tense silence, then the door cracked open and Luke Castellan stuck his head out. He looked at Chris, at all the kids staring at him, and smiled stiffly, “I’m good. Don’t worry about me.”
He shut the door once more, the force blowing Chris’ hair back for a brief moment. The boy shrugged and nodded at everyone else to start getting ready because it was almost time for breakfast. He headed over to Percy, asked how his first night was, and left him to gather his bearings before they had to leave. 
The kids attempted to forget about Luke’s debacle in the bathroom, but when they started to get impatient about his hogging it, all disregard of his personal business went flying out of the window. One kid mustered the balls to knock, and then another shouted through the wood for him to hurry up. 
Just as one of the Stoll brothers was about to pick the lock himself and check out the situation, the door flew open, and Luke frowned at them from the doorway, “I’m done, my gods.” 
They looked at him — he was leaning against the now open door, hip bucked out and not a care in the world that he was in nothing but his underwear. He glanced at them, then at the kid who Percy thought was called Conor, and sneered in his face until the kid flinched back. When he did, Luke pushed the bathroom door until it hit the wall and gestured dramatically inside, “In you go.” 
Percy didn’t think he was the only one who was shocked by Luke’s sudden show of attitude. Sure, he’d only known the guy for a day, but he’d been super nice the whole time. Even when Percy was ready to give up on finding his skill, Luke was supportive and kind. Now, he just looked irritated at everyone in the room. Maybe he wasn’t a morning person. 
Yeah, that was probably it. 
Percy decided to let him wake up a bit instead of irritating him with questions about how the morning routine at camp usually went. Instead, he followed the lead of the kids around him and got himself ready before lining up along the wall. His face bloomed red when someone had to tell him to go to the back because he was new, but other than that he was doing somewhat alright. 
Chris and Luke were arguing quietly in the corner, being careful to ensure nobody else could hear their murmurs. At one point, Luke stepped up so he was nose to nose with Chris and the boy put his hands on his chest to push him back — only for Luke to sharpen his eyes down at them with such a scandalised look that even Percy was slightly confused from where he stood and watched. Luke folded his arms over his chest indignantly and Chris sent him a dumb look before muttering something that made Luke straighten and drop his arms once more. 
When the boys ceased their conversation and walked over, the kids pretended as if they hadn’t been watching their entire time
“Okayyy.” Luke spoke, huffing out a breath. He shot his hands out and waved them, “Let’s go.” Nobody moved, and he furrowed his brows, “Uh, onwards and upwards? Hop to? En guarde?” Silence greeted him and he rolled his eyes, clapping loudly, “Can yall just fuckin’ move?”
The kids at the front flinched slightly, deciding it best to just leave rather than wait for him to say his usual morning pick-me-up. Clearly he was having a bad day and they chose to leave him to his own devices. Percy followed at the back, and couldn’t help but listen as Chris muttered to him once more from behind him. 
“Can you at least try to act like a normal person, please?” 
“I am acting normal.”
“Luke Normal.” He paused, waiting. Percy guessed Luke must’ve agreed silently because the next thing he said was, “Thank you. Now get to the front of the line like the cabin counsellor you are.” 
Luke huffed, pushing past Percy to get to the front of the line. Chris followed, whispering something about Luke having a bad day and to just ignore him before jogging to catch up. The blonde boy had never felt so awkward — the only friend he’d made and the guy was skulking around like he hated the world only twelve hours after they’d met. 
He tried to brush it off by focusing on his breakfast — blue pancakes, blue cherry coke. Okay, not the healthiest option but he was having a bad weekend, let him live. 
Chiron came to find him a bit after that, asking Percy how he was settling in and if he was ready for the Capture the Flag game they were playing later. 
After that, Percy tried to avoid the prying eyes of Annabeth by spending his free hour in the Hermes cabin where she couldn’t get to him — only to walk in on something a lot more awkward. 
Luke was lying on the floor, groaning in pain. The smiley Demeter girl he had introduced Percy to the day before was on top of him, also groaning in pain. 
“Uh, are you guys okay?”
They flinched, scrambling off each other and pulling themselves to their feet. Luke brushed himself off and looked at Percy wide eyed, “It’s not what it looks like!”
“Seriously.” The girl said when Percy raised his brow. She shook her head slowly, “We would never —“
“Yeah.” Luke scoffed, “Like never ever.” 
The girl — Percy was still trying to remember her name — turned her head and looked at him blankly, “Okay. That wasn’t needed.”
“I’m just clarifying.”
“You didn’t need to sound so disgusted about it, though.” 
“Oh my god.” Luke scoffed a chuckle, shaking his head, “You’re such a guy.”
Percy screwed up his face, and Luke suddenly backtracked, “Uh, I mean — such a lie…er.” Even he looked confused by what he’d said. He straightened up and scoffed, waving his hands, “She wants me so bad. Right? Bro?” He held out a fist, but Percy just looked at it. 
The girl, who had swiftly knocked his hand back to his side and stepped slightly in front of him, smiled kindly like she had yesterday when she’d asked how Percy was feeling about the sudden change in his life. “Sorry for scaring you, Perce. We’re just talking about something. Did you have a question?” 
“Yeah, actually.” He looked at her, “Are you in pyjamas?” 
She looked down at herself like she was just remembering her white tank top and fleece pyjama pants with bats printed on them, and Luke laughed into his fist. Upon hearing his chuckles, she swivelled back to glare at him, “Hey, don’t laugh at me! Would you rather me undress you?” 
“What?” Percy asked. He was ignored. 
Luke took a step back and held up one finger, “Uh, no. I don’t need you looking at my tits, perv.” 
“What?” Percy tried again. 
The girl scoffed, looking away from him and muttering under her breath, “Kinda hard not to when they get hot in the night and climb out of your shirt.” 
Luke gasped and put his hands to his chest, “Oh my gods.” 
“I tried not to look but they were right there — !”
"Well — " Luke stammered for a rebuttal, eventually pointing in accusation at the girl beside him, "You had morning wood!
"What — ?!"
“Hey, guys!” Percy finally interrupted, and they looked at him in surprise like they’d forgotten he’d been standing there the whole time. “What the hell is going on?”
The two shared a look, but it was you who stepped forward and looked at him kindly, “Nothing you should worry about. You’ve had a tough weekend already, just pretend you never saw us.” 
Percy was tempted to refuse and force them to spill the beans, but they were two older campers who could very well send him to detention or whatever it was they did here for punishment — he wasn’t keen on finding out. So he left with a nod and closed the door behind him. 
Your voice drifted through the window, “—can’t believe you wear batman pyjamas.”
“At least I wear pyjamas.” Luke responded, “You left very little to my imagination this morning.” 
He walked off before he could hear anymore. 
He didn’t see either of you again until just before lunch. He was walking through camp with Grover, half-listening to his friend yap about a blueberry bush he thought was cute, when they passed you and your sisters giggling about something near the forges. 
“Gods, he’s cute, though.” One of them was saying, eyeing up a boy with soot all over his face. Percy couldn’t see much of him to determine him as cute, but your sisters seemed to agree with a loud dreamy sigh. 
“He is, don’t get me wrong.” Another girl added, “But consider this: Lee Fletcher.”
“Oh, yeah.” 
“He’s got potential. He’s got potential.” 
Percy found himself slowing down, the teenage boy in him wondering if someone would mention his name. Of course they wouldn’t — he’s twelve, and they’re all around yours and Luke’s age, but a boy could dream. 
One of the girls clicked her tongue, looking at you, “Who was it you said was sorta dreamy the other day?”
Percy watched you freeze, suddenly looking very awkward. You took a deep breath in and pretended to think about what you were going to say, but one of your sisters chimed in for you.
“It was Astor. The Ares kid with the curly hair.” 
“Oh yeah!”
“What?” You exclaimed, scrunching up your face. When your sisters looked at you all confused, you backtracked, “Uh, I mean yeah he’s…cute.” You forced the word out with difficulty, “But, I dunno. There's cuter guys out there.”
“Oh?” Your sister said, interested, “Who are you thinking?”
Now you were on the spot. You swallowed, making these exaggerated facial expressions that Percy assumed were you trying to convince the girls that you had just come up with this idea, when you’d actually probably been wanting to say it the whole time you’d been talking and just needed an excuse, “Oh, I don’t know…” You shrugged, “Luke Castellan’s sorta…y’know?”
The girls looked between each other, and you watched with slight anticipation. Then one of them, the one who had mentioned Lee Fletcher earlier, said, “I swear you said he was too full of himself.”
“What —?”
“Yeah, she did.” The other chimed in, “You said he would be cuter if he didn’t — what was it? — flaunt around camp like he had the biggest cock out of all of ‘em.”
The girls laughed, and you attempted a weak chuckle, but it sorta looked like you were in pain. Percy thought it best to walk off after that, looking for Grover who had long since left him to his eavesdropping devices and presumably wandered off into the forest to look for Blue the blueberry bush. 
So maybe Percy should’ve pressed harder when he’d cornered you and Luke earlier that morning. He thought he could brush it off, even when he kept seeing Luke lift up the hem of his shirt and poke at his abs in wonder, or when he saw you pushing your hair out of your face once every ten seconds before finally putting it in the messiest ponytail he’d ever seen. It was as if you had lost all sense of self overnight, like you'd never actually seen your own bodies before. It creeped him out, but he held back on asking. Maybe it was a demigod thing he hadn't been taught yet.
The straw that broke the camel's back, however, was after dinner. Usually when the nymphs take the plates away and the campers start to trickle down to the campfire, a few odd groups would stay behind at their tables, gossiping or finishing their desert until they had to get up and go — not only were you and your siblings part of this group of people, but so were Luke and Chris (and, by default because he had nobody else to hang out with, Percy). 
So the newcomer had the fortunate opportunity to bear witness to possibly the greatest series of events he’d ever seen (and he once saw a rat the size of a small dog eating a small dog). 
It all started when a girl from the Aphrodite table stood up and walked over to where the boys were sitting. 
“So, if you do ever want to sneak out to the forests, don’t go through the pavilion.” Chris was explaining, “Mr D has a birds eye view of the whole place from his bedroom window, so you gotta sneak as close to the Big House as you can get. But make sure to duck under the windows just in case Chiron is trotting around in there.” 
“And be careful around cabin four.” Luke butted in, “They have vines that spring out of the floor whenever a non-Demeter kid gets too close during the night.”
Chris turned to his brother with a look, “How do you know that?”
“Oh, uh — ”
“Hey, Luke.” 
Three heads turned to the edge of the table where she was standing — a pretty girl with short blonde hair, a few strands dyed pink near the front. She was smiling at Luke cheekily and Percy noticed Chris send his brother a smirk. 
“Uh, hi…” Luke trailed off, squinting.
“Laura.” She finished with a frown.
“Laura!” He exclaimed, snapping his fingers. “I knew that. I did.”
“Cool.” She said slowly, brushing off the moment and bouncing around the table to sit next to him on the bench. She leaned on her elbows into his side and Percy watched him shuffle back, only for Chris to push him right back forward. “So, uh, I had fun…last night.” She side eyed Percy across the table, but the boy just pursed his lips awkwardly. 
“Really?” Luke responded, a little shocked. He nodded, “Well, uh, me too?”
Laura grinned widely at that, back straightening, “I’m so glad we agree.”
Percy wasn’t so sure Luke agreed, he wasn’t even sure the guy remembered whatever saucy interaction she was referring to. But he was pretending to, for her sake. He blinked at her silently, but she just looked as if she was waiting for him to say something — Percy was only young, but he’d seen enough movies to know that she was waiting for him to suggest they do it again sometime. 
He did not. Instead he twisted his body away from her and back towards Percy, smiling at him, “Wanna head to the campfire, get some good seats?”
The boy was moments away from responding, but Laura clearly wasn’t taking his silence as an answer. She pulled Luke back to face her by his arm and blinked up at him, “I was just about to suggest we skip the fire tonight. Just us, y’know?” 
Chris cleared his throat and stood, ushering for Percy to do the same, “Let’s go, lil bro.”
“Wait — “ Luke stood with them, staring back with a silent plea of help. Chris wasn’t having it, just grinning at him. 
“Have fun, Luke.” He snorted, “See you later.” 
“No, you can’t — ” He started, but Laura was yanking him back with a high pitched giggle. 
“You heard him, Luke.” She smirked, “No one's gonna notice we’re gone, loosen up.” She ran a slow finger down his torso, and Percy watched him visibly tense up. He didn’t understand why she hadn't taken the hint already. 
Chris seized Percy by the wrist and began to pull him away, occasionally looking back and giggling like a schoolgirl, with the odd snort. The younger boy didn’t really want to look back, but then when he heard Luke yelp like a girl, well…
He had to. And thank the gods he did.
Luke was sprawled on the table like a scared rabbit and Laura was standing with one hand hanging limply in the air, looking confusedly at his stance. Chris burst into loud laughter when he noticed Luke’s legs were spread and the boy was trying really hard not to look at his own crotch. 
They walked over when it was clear someone needed to intervene, and Percy noticed the Demeter girls from before joining them — you were at the front, looking panicked and slightly annoyed.
"What's going on?" You asked, looking between the two of them.
"Nothing." Laura said plainly, "We were just talking."
Luke looked at you, “She — uh, she grabbed your — uh, your — ” 
He gestured between his legs with a shaky hand. Percy raised a brow, as did everyone else at the scene. Except for Laura, who began to cackle loudly, bending over at the hips and bracing her hands on her thighs. The rest of the kids stared at the pair with varying expressions, and Laura straightened up, wiping under eyes with a giggle before pointing between you and Luke. 
“You guys — oh my gods — ” She laughed again, shaking her head and trying to breathe long enough to get her words out, “Holy Hades, Castellan. I’m — I’m sorry.” 
She held her hands up in surrender, looking at you now, “I am. I didn’t know you guys were dating. I guess I took mine and Luke’s conversation the wrong way, but — ” Another wheeze, “And I shouldn’t be laughing, but he just referred to his penis as yours, and I — ” 
“Laura, it’s not like — ” You stepped up with a wince, trying to alleviate the growing tension between the group. The Aphrodite girl wasn’t listening. 
“I just think that’s the funniest thing I’ve heard since…” She took a moment to think, catching her breath and smiling at herself as she thought about it. Eventually, she gestured to you with a laugh, “Well, since last night when you called Graham Lee an extra-terrestrial ass-kisser.” 
Luke licked his lips, taking a deep breath in and pushing himself off the table and to his feet. He went to say something to Laura, face serious, but then he stopped and knocked his head back in a slight movement. He looked around at nothing, as if he was recollecting a memory, and then he gasped and pointed a finger at you, “I did do that.”
“You called Graham Lee an extra-terrestrial ass-kisser?” You tilted your head at Luke, “Why?”
Luke shrugged, “He grabbed my ass.” 
Laura scrunched up her face, looking between the pair of them, “Are you guys on drugs?”
"There aren't any drugs at this camp." You blanked. You brother laughed.
"Says the drug dealer."
You raised a brow in shock, like you'd had no idea about your own small business. You looked at Luke intensely -- Percy thought maybe you were trying to keep your drug dealing thing a secret, and Luke had gone and spilled the beans. That would explain why he suddenly looked so sheepish. It wouldn't explain why you then said, "Well I am not on drugs."
"Then what is wrong with you guys?" Someone finally asked the question Percy had been sitting on since he watched you hover your hands over your own boobs before retracting them quickly as if it was against some demigod rule to touch your own body — only for Luke to see from afar and have some very stern words to say about it.
Finally, after ten seconds of intense eye contact, you and Luke took in simultaneous breaths. It was you who spoke first, addressing the whole crowd — which consisted of Percy, Laura, Chris, and the Demeter kids — “We’re in eachother’s bodies.” 
The Demeter kids made grossed out faces, but Chris just snorted into his fist and let the conversation go on. Percy had never been more confused in his entire life — and he had once thought his dad was Jesus. 
Laura chuckled, “Yeah, we know that. His penis is yours, or whatever freaky shit yall are up to.” 
“What?”
“No — ” 
You and Luke spoke at once, each taking a single step forward. You paused, looking at each-other until you gestured at Luke with a sigh, letting him speak. He nodded, “We’re serious. We are in each other's bodies.”
“Freaky Friday style.” You jumped in before anyone could make a sex joke. You sent the group a sharp look, and then zeroed your eyes in on Percy, “That’s why we were acting so out of it earlier.”
It was silent for a long stretch — everyone looking between one another. Percy didn’t even know what to say. It did explain their strange behaviour, but —
“How the hell did you end up in each other’s bodies?” A demeter boy asked, holding a finger up like he was in class. The rest of them nodded, wondering the same. 
“Well…” Luke sighed (or You sighed, he guessed. He was still confused), “At first we had no idea, but now I think it was Graham Lee.”
Another Demeter girl hummed, “He is a Hecate kid. It’d make sense that he put some freaky spell on you after you insulted him.”
Chris coughed, still red in the face from laughing into his shirt, “Okay, but why Luke?” 
You shrugged, “Dunno. I’ve never done anything to the guy.”
Suddenly, Laura let out a long, “Oooohhhh.”
Everyone eyed her. She pursed her lips in embarrassment, although Percy definitely saw amusement in her eyes. She tucked some hair behind her ear and winced, “So, maybe we went to the clash together.”
“The what?” Percy asked, finally speaking up. The rest of the group looked at him as if only just realising he’d been standing there, suddenly looking sheepish. 
“Uh, it’s a party.” Chris scratched behind his ear, “Older campers only, but if you don’t tell anyone about ‘em you can come to the next one.” 
He shrugged, “Deal.”
“So, wait.” You pointed at Laura, “You went to the clash with Graham? Like with him?” 
“Yeah.” She folded her arms indignantly, “But he was literally staring at you the whole time, so I left to flirt with Luke.” 
Your cheeks dusted pink, and both Laura and Percy realised she was talking to Luke, not you. She turned to Luke, clearing her throat, “Sorry. He was staring at you the whole time. So I left to flirt with…uh, Luke.” 
A collective breath ran through the group, everyone putting the pieces together in their own heads. Percy was still a little unsure, but he had the gist (maybe). Just as he was about to suggest they go find this Graham guy and ask him to undo his spell, one of the Demeter girls Percy had seen talking to you earlier gasped and looked between you and Luke with wide eyes. 
“So when we were talking before…” She looked at you, “We were talking to Luke?” 
You — or Luke, but as you — stammered, and Percy couldn’t help but let out a little laugh. Luke looked on, confused, and the girl looked at him with a smirk, 
“Earlier, we were gossiping about hot guys.” She chuckled, pointing at you, “And Luke suggested his own name, as you!” 
“What?” Luke exclaimed at you, partially appalled but also holding in a laugh. 
You stammered for an excuse, but then her face contorted and she zeroed Luke with an accusatory stare, “Well, you said I walked around camp acting like I had the biggest cock out of them all!” 
Luke scoffed, “You do.” 
“I do not!”
“You kind do.”
“Yeah, you do.”
“You sorta do, man.”
You turned to Chris, scandalised, “Bro.”
The boy shrugged, “Sorry man. It’s true.”
Eventually, you managed to convince the kids to finally go to the campfire and leave Luke and yourself to fix your problem with Graham when you got down there. They agreed, although not without making as many jokes as they could on the walk down to the clearing. 
“So, how did you guys pee?”
“Have you seen each other all naked and stuff now?”
“Did Luke have morning woo — ?”
“Alright.” You smacked Chris hard on the back for that one. “To your sections, please.”
Percy sat down on the end of a log, and watched as the two of you walked over to Graham and spoke to him in hushed but harsh tones. At one point, Graham was looking between you two with the most genuine look of confusion and Percy assumed he only agreed to reverse the spell because it was making his mind go all wobbly just talking to you. 
When he saw Luke again, it was at lights out. Percy was tucking himself into his thin sleeping bag when the boy came over, crouching to his level and dropping something on his lap. 
He lifted the bag of coins to his eyeline and then raised a brow at Luke, “What’s this for?”
“Drachmas.” He explained, “Just enough to get you a new shirt at the camp store. Or a thicker pillow, some three ply toilet paper. Whatever you want, really.” He shrugged, “Partly a welcome to camp gift, partly hush money.”
“Right.” Percy lowered the bag and levelled Luke with a curious look, “How was being in another person’s body? Weird?”
“Oh yeah.” He nodded, looking into the distance like he was having some awful flashbacks. Percy remembered seeing you walk out of the bathroom earlier, a look of terror plastered in your eyes. 
He cleared his throat, “Well, thanks for the money.”
“No problem, kid.” He patted him on the shoulder, “Get some rest. It’s capture the flag day tomorrow and guess what?"
"What?"
"We're teaming up with Demeter."
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cupcakeinat0r · 2 months
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A Nerdy middle-aged loser Miguel w a dad bod who teaches your genetics class.
He has a huge crush on you even though he knows he shouldn’t but how tf couldn’t he????
With the way you always walk in a minute or two late, making the whole class look at you as you strut in with your quiet “so sorry!” and your cute little outfits that show off the best parts of your body.
Miguel’s eyes would follow you and the way you set down your bag, whipping out your computer, ready to absorb all the knowledge that Prof. O’Hara has to offer like a sponge. He usually has to stand behind his podium because watching you hang onto every single one of his words with those parted, glossy lips and curious eyes made him embarrassingly hard.
Or the way you took notes, your cute little organization of colors and annotations. Your kindness in giving notes to your peers because you wanted to see everyone succeed. Even though you may not have looked like it, you were a smarty pants, too. And he found that extremely hot.
During his lecture, he’ll sometimes catch you applying lip gloss or fixing your hair in your compact mirror and think to himself how gorgeous you are and how lucky your boyfriend that you totally already have is.
Cuz there’s no way he could pull someone like you. Those days are over for him. Plus, you were way out of his league.
But he can’t help but have a sliver of hope every time you leave class with an adorable smile and small wave.
“Thank you so much, Professor O’Hara! Great class today!!”, your praise never ceasing to make him slightly flustered on the inside.
Before you, he totally fucked his own hand like everyday. He’s a lonesome man. But now that you were in his life? That man goes home everyday, imagining his had is your luscious, tight cunt, replaying your cute voice in his head over and over again.
What he has no idea is that his praise has the same effect on you.
Anytime you had a question or were worried that you weren’t understanding a concept, Miguel would comfort you, with the most gentle words and voice.
He was such a cute man. It’d be so easy to praise him and baby him, telling him he’s sooo smart and such a good teacher.
His well-kept black hair w tiny hints of gray throughout, his black rimmed square glasses, his little cashmere sweater + button up combos that hugged around his broad chest, enormous biceps, and pudgy belly. He was sooo dreamy. He made it so hard to focus.
You’d go up to his desk after class needing clarification on a topic. He’d tell you to sit down, eager to help you with the class (or anything ever, he’d do anything for you if it meant keeping you).
His cologne would fill your nose as he bends over the table, a strand of hair falling on his forehead, pushing his glass up his nose as he towers over you as he explains what ever it was you were confused about.
It never helped because you never caught a single word. You were too busy imagining his soft stomach rubbing against your back as he bends you over the table, plowing you while saying those sweet words of encouragement into your ear.
And those veiny, hairy arms and hands wrapped around your waist as he bounces you on his fat cock, making those adorable glasses of his fog up.
“Don’t worry, sweetie, you’re doing great, as always.”
“Don’t be so hard on yourself, sweetheart.”
“I know, mama, It’s a hard concept to grasp, but you’ll get it. I know it.”
It made you scream on the inside. You wanted so badly to be a good student for him so that he could talk to you this way every single class.
Pt.2 here!
Want more DadBod!Miguel ? Here’s my master list, bae!!
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cashmoneyyysstuff · 1 month
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this is loosely based off of @emmyrosee 's messing with sukuna post bc i just love the idea of messing with your whiny baby dramatic boyfriend and i immediately thought about katsuki ! if you want this taken down lmk !
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katsuki is hilarious to mess with.
you've only been staring at him for about 5 seconds when he turns to you.
"whaddya want ?" he asks with a raised brow. you're still all smiles, resting your head into your palm
"nothing." you hum, he grumbles a bit but doesn't pay it any mind. until you keep staring. he's trying to focus on his phone but you can tell he's about to snap when he starts squinting at the device.
"what ?" he grumbles, red eyes narrow at your smile widening.
"nothing !"
"yn. don't fuck with me."
"i'm not !" you giggle " i'm just looking at you, am i not allowed to ?"
you know exactly what to say to fluster him without fail every time, it's something you're most proud of when you see the tips of his ears turn a light shade of pink.
"..no."
you snort "no ?"
"shaddup." he says through gritted teeth "so what, you're just lookin' at me ?"
"yeah." you shrug "i like lookin' at my pretty boyfriend." you prop your head against the couch and sigh dreamingly to sell the lovesick act. katsuki inhales through his nose, chest puffing like he's upset and he tsks, ears and cheeks beet red.
"weirdo." he scoffs, then grabs the back of your head to pull you in and press his lips to yours roughly.
you're both breathing heavy when you pull away. he looks at you, mouth slightly agape as he heaves lightly, eyeing you from your eyes to your lips. and then he huffs through his nose like a bull and roughly pulls you into in chest, causing you to release an 'oomph !' at the force when he flops down onto the couch, pulling you with him.
"m'not pretty." he mocks your voice and you huff a laugh into his collarbone. you wiggle around and your boyfriend loosens his hold a bit so you can look up at him.
"you so are !" you argue, he won't look at you but narrows his eyes at the tv he'd turned to to distract himself from your gaze.
"nah, that's you, babe." he switches through the channels "thought you said i was handsome last week."
"you can be pretty and handsome at the same time, the proof is right in front of me." you flirt, he looks at your from the corner of his eye and his mouth curls up like he smelled something nasty when you wink at him.
"gross."
"you're blushing~" you sing, closing your eyes and laying your head onto his chest, you sigh happily when he starts rubbing up and down your back instinctively.
"go to sleep. m'tired of listening to you." he pushes your head down into his chest jokingly and you giggle. you can't see the smirk growing on his face from where your being shoved into.
you wrestle out of his hold to look at him to see he's already staring at you, half smirk on his face and he scoffs at your expression, you huff through your nose and your smile widens.
"you love me." you whisper knowingly, katsuki takes the hand off of your back to pinch at your side and he snorts when you squeal.
"unfortunately."
you yelp when he wets his lips and he captures yours in a sloppy wet kiss.
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ourautumn86 · 5 months
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loser ellie! hc
nsfw and sfw content!
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loser! ellie who can’t flirt to save her life. and when they tell her they’re flirting with her she’ll look around and point at herself with a ‘me’?
loser! ellie who would suddenly be out eating with joel and send you things like this:
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loser! ellie whose glasses would get all foggy from kissing.
loser! ellie who would stay up ‘till late and when someone would ask her to go to sleep she would go like;
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loser! ellie who while in the middle of sexting would send you things like this;
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(she doesn’t know how to set the mood)
loser! ellie who when falls in love posts in her social media stuff like;
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loser! ellie who when gets horny begs to eat you out, getting pussy drunk and moaning non-stop against your cunt. she would spent hours like that, her own pussy so wet… but she couldn’t find herself to stop.
loser! ellie who asks for nudes like this;
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loser! ellie who gets sooooo needy when high, asking for hugs and kisses.
loser! ellie who when she gets jealous and you notice she would be like. “no no, don’t try and kiss me now. go back to your little girlfriend.😒”
loser! ellie who sends this to the chat group on christmas even though she already knows the truth.
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loser! ellie who spaces out on the group hangouts and suddenly goes like “if i had a dick it would be massive”.
loser! ellie who is always sending you pictures of cartoon couples or cute things she found on pinterest and be like “look it’s us!!!”
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loser! ellie who would always act dominant but at the first act of defiance or teasing would fall apart. she’s so easy to break… she’ll be begging in a blink.
loser! ellie who has to cancel a plan ‘cause she’s already hanging out with “the wife”.
loser! ellie who draws you so much her notebook is filled with doodles of you.
loser! ellie who first told you i love you when she was half asleep and couldn’t remember it later so you got mad and she would be like; “why are you mad at me? i’m sorry! baby what did i do wrong!?!?😭”
a/n; she lives freely in my mind.
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aajjks · 11 months
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loser ≠ lover (m)
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synopsis. He wants you so much, even if you’ll destroy him, because he’d let you.
fem reader x yandere oc.
warnings. yándere, öbsession, masochïstic tendencies, mentions of physical, emotional abûse, unhealthy thöughts, èxtreme obsession, obsessive thoughts.
note. MY FIRST OC!!!!! UHHH IM SO SO NERVOUS BECAUSE IM NEW TO THIS KIND OF THING BUT I HOPE YOU ALL WILL GIVE HIM A CHANCE. HES ALL YOURS TO INTERACT WITH, send fanart?!?? Please I’d be honoured, send asks talk to him!!!! 😭💌
second instalment x
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loser boy who worships the ground you walk on!
Who licks off the dirt that trails off your shoes as you walk down the school hallway.
loser boy who is so obsessed with you that he can’t breathe if he can’t get a look at you.
loser boy who can’t feel anything but love for you, passion that pumps so hard in his veins for you, who can’t say a word without stuttering except your name.
Loser boy who follows you around like a lost puppy, who doesn’t care if your ‘friends’ cuss at him, if you call him a dirty dog.
At least you’re talking to him! God, he’s so lucky!
“Goodness fuck off! You sicko! How’d you find my address!?” You spit at him, your eyes filled so beautifully with hues of disgust, your luscious lips curled up in annoyance. He smiles so brightly at you, God, you’re so beautiful.
“O-Oh please! C-Call me more names! P-Please!” He begs, on his knees, his raven hair falling on his grey orbs, his lashes wet as he begs you.
You feel embarrassed, He notices, yet he feels his heart burning from the need to hear you insult him.
It’s been too long.
And that’s why he’s here, at 1 am right infront of your door, begging.
“Fucking masochist! You’re so disgusting! FUCK OFF.” The way your shoe hits his jaw, makes him moan out your name like a prayer.
You groan in anger, he gets up again, you struggle against him, your nails scratch him, the burn feels euphoric, he missed you so bad.
“You don’t understand huh?!? LEAVE. ME. ALONE.” You try to get away from him, the boy doesn’t let you, instead he grabs your legs, wrapping his arms around them, “n-no please! take me back please!” He’s sobbing.
Yet his heart loves the thrill of your resistance, it turns him on so much, his pants feel so painfully tight, “NEVER! You ARE NOT GOOD FOR ANYTHING! You are of no use to me anymore!” you keep insulting him, it makes him feel so relieved.
You hadn’t been talking to him for so long, he almost went insane without you.
“Y-YN p-please kiss me!” He stands up, “p-please!”
“FUCK OFF Ezekiel!” His mind blurs.
His tongue lulls out and he whimpers as you finally utter his name out, it sounds so good, so erotic from your mouth, His name was made for you to call out.
He is so obsessed with you.
“S-Say it again… p-please!” Ezekiel stands up, his knees wobble, the stormy grey eyes are full of lust, craziness.
You roll your eyes at him again, it only makes him so much more excited, he loves your rejection so much, he always has.
Because it’s a unique bond between you, you treat him special, he knows.
“fuck off weirdo.” Ezekiel doesn’t say anything but pushes you against the door of your house, “YN…” he brings his face so much closer to you, he feels scared yet thrilled.
You’re so unpredictable, it makes him shake with anticipation.
“P-Please don’t leave- don’t-don’t abandon me! I-I’m sorry I disappointed you b-but he deserved it.” You raise your eyebrows at his ‘apology’
“No. Get away from me you sick freak! You had no right to beat him up like that, who are you huh? My boyfriend? Please…” you scoff, “you’re nothing to me Ezekiel, absolutely nothing.” You spit again at him.
God.
“You’re just a pathetic man who gets me off. You’re just a pastime you get that?” You point your finger to his chest.
“Y’know you’re lucky you have a big dick and a pretty face. sometimes you’re obedient too and you make good punching bag.” You laugh so cruelly, venom drips in your words.
Yet he takes it as words of praise.
“You’re like my dog.”
Yes he is.
“S-So please just take me back? I-I’m so sorry YN…. Please punish me but not like this! H-HIT ME.” He takes your hand and swipes it hard across his cheek.
You gasp in surprise, Ezekiel looks at you with pure desperation. “Please! I-I can’t live without you,” he bites his lower lip, the mole under his lips becomes more evident.
“I-I can please you! I can help you get off! Please let me- give me a chance- I’ll make you cum as many times you’ll want to- PLEASE GIVE ME A CHANCE AT REDEMPTION!”
“P-Please!”
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elliesonlyhoe · 9 days
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Loser!ellie headcannons .ᐟ (pt. 2)
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(Warnings: Some NSFW ‘nd I think that's it, lmk if I missed anything !)
Loser! Ellie who fucking loves neck kisses (and kisses in general)
Loser! Ellie who claims she's fully capable of being away from you for long periods of time yet not even 10 minutes after you walk out the door to go to work, she starts calling/texting you.
Loser! Ellie who begged you to get matching pajamas with her until you just caved and ordered them😭
“Babeee just hear me out!” Ellie whined, shoving her phone in your face which on the screen had a picture of a couple wearing these adorable matching dinosaur onesies. “Els no. I'm not wearing fucking dinosaur pajamas..” You rolled your eyes playfully, pushing her phone away “But-” “No Ellie.” You cut her off. “Y'know what, fine then.” Ellie said, turning away from you. You look at your girlfriend sighing “Ellie do not..” you say chuckling playfully, you knew when Ellie didn't get her way it resulted in her giving you the silent treatment. “For fucks sake, give me the phone.” You say trying to sound annoyed but failing. “Fuck yes!” Ellie said in excitement handing you her phone so you could purchase the pajamas
Once you placed the order you sighed seeing your girlfriend smirking at you, “You're such a dick” you tease, obviously not meaning it “I love you too~” Ellie teases back an adorable giggle of excitement escaping her lips.
Loser! Ellie who would make these adorable paper rings for the two of you :( <3 (and you would wear yours everywhere you go)
Loser! Ellie who absolutely adores physical touch, but quality time and words of affirmations and are close 2nds
Loser! Ellie who clings to you like a little koala throughout the day
Loser! Ellie who cannot stay quiet during makeout sessions for shit. (I'm talking constant whining and small breathy moans in between kisses)
Loser! Ellie who likes watching you every move, she just finds it so fucking attractive how you manage to look so cute doing literally anything
Loser! Ellie who wrote cute songs for you before you guys started dating and would play them on her guitar without you realizing that the songs were actually about YOU
Loser! Ellie who scrolls through the texts between you and her while you're at work and gets off to any and every voice note and/or photo/video you've ever sent her (She's so fucking needy I swearrr)
Loser! Ellie who would find you 10x hotter if you could speak another language🙏❤ (like don’t get me wrong she'd love you regardless but this bitch is a sucker for other languages and accents)
Loser! Ellie who 100% prefers tits over ass 
Loser! Ellie who begs to watch Jurassic Park on your movie nights (despite having watched it with you a million times.)
Loser! Ellie who can't keep her hands off of you whatsoever
You and Ellie had gone out to a restaurant of your choice for your weekly date, sure Ellie wasn't much of a restaurant typa girl but she'd do anything if it meant seeing you happy. That night you had been wearing this beautiful wine red dress that hugged your body so perfectly, Ellie couldn’t help but stare at the way the dress showed off your every curve. She swore she was in heaven, not to mention how short the dress was, she was so tempted to glide her hand across your thigh just to get a reaction out of you. You, on the other hand, didn't even need to look over at your girlfriend to know that her eyes were roaming your body. 
“Hm? Something wrong Els?” you teased as she snapped out of whatever trance your body had on her “You're just s'pretty mama.. it's unbearable..” Ellie mumbled, before starting to play with the bottom of your dress, her hands almost finding a way underneath. “Baby, not here..” you mumbled tapping Ellies hand with your own as a signal for her to move it away. “Please babe~ I'll make it quick..” Ellie whispered as she nuzzled into the nape of your neck, placing soft kisses along your supple skin. You whined quietly feeling your girlfriends tongue and lips trailing along your neck up to your ear. “Fuck it.. just be quick..” you say trying your best not to lose your composure. Ellie grins and places her hand in yours standing up and directing you to the restroom. 
Loser! Ellie who likes picking dandelions and putting them in your hair at any chance she gets
Loser! Ellie who has a playlist she listens to on the daily of songs that remind her of you
Loser! Ellie who can’t pose in pictures for shit, like you'll be standing there doing a cute lil pose for the selfie you wanted to take of the two of you while Ellie either holds up a peace sign or just awkwardly stands like “🧍‍♀️”
Loser! Ellie who tells all her friends about you and tells them all the cute things you've said or done
A/N .ᐟ : Thank you guys sm for all the love on pt.1 (like deadass I'm so grateful) so I figured I'd make a part 2!
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konigsblog · 1 month
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loser!könig with a mommy kink???!!! 👀
now... THIS should be canon. (⁠*⁠´⁠ω⁠`⁠*⁠) 🍼
tw: loser-könig, mommy kink, lactation, forced impregnation and breeding, slight dub-con, creepy-könig, pervy-könig. mdni 18+
dead dove: do not eat. 🔞
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loser-könig isn't above forcefully impregnating you just to get what he wants.
he's so incredibly needy to see milk leaking from your perky, little nipples, to suck them ‘til they're swollen, or to be praised and told how good he is whilst he's being brutal, almost violent with you.
he's not gentle, nor tender whatsoever. if anything, he's aggressive and merciless as he fucks your drooling, tight hole, making sure you're squeaking like a mouse by the end of it. despite your pleas and desperate complaints, he will continue to refuse to wear a condom, or let you on any form of birth control. he'll tell you, that the side effects aren't worth it — and how do you expect him to enjoy himself when he's wearing protection?? don't you care about his pleasure, too??you should make it up to him by allowing him to fuck you raw...
he's not against using an excuse that he must be allergic to the latex, that he's unable to use it!! don't bother looking for any alternatives, könig has his mind set on his deepest fantasy that he constantly tries to persuade you with, that it will make him so fucking happy, little mouse. :(
loser-könig will breed you, so he's able to watch as you lactate milk. his search history is filled with pornography and videos of pregnancy, admitting that he wants to suck the milk from your nipples, bite them ‘til they're sore and aching whilst you whisper and mutter sweet words.
it wouldn't be surprising if he had mommy issues, that he didn't get a lot of attention as his mother worked long hours, having no time for her beloved son. instead, könig would beg you with tears in his eyes, his thrusts getting increasingly more painful and harsh, to praise him and tell him how perfect he is.
once you're finally swollen with his babies, he won't be able to keep his lips off of you, or his dick out of your holes... ;(
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kkbardd · 4 months
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Reverse Nerd!AU in which Asuka is a fictional character and Rei is a diehard weeb who makes her their entire personality
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loser-jpg · 1 year
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"Ouch." 
"Hold still and it won't hurt as much." 
Eddie Munson was sitting on the counter in his bathroom, and in front of him was one Steve Harrington. Normally a situation like this would intrigue anyone, but considering the black eye and the blood dripping down his face, Eddie wasn't as excited as he may normally be. 
"Actually it wouldn't hurt at all if you hadn't decided to get in a fight with that asshole." 
Steve was doing his best to clean up Eddies face, but a very squirmy Eddie was not helping the situation. 
"I didn't even start it, he said shit so I insulted him back. He just happened to think with his fists rather than his words." 
"You instigated that fight and you know it." 
"I won didn't I? OW!" 
"I don't think this is the face of a winner." 
Steve stepped away from Eddie, giving up on helping any more than he had. In all honesty he was right, that was not the face of a winner. 
"What no kiss to make it better?" Eddie pointed to the small gash on his forehead, and although he didn't expect anything he was pleasantly surprised when Steve took a step toward him before reluctantly leaning downward to plant a kiss near the injury. 
"Better?" 
"...hurts here too." Eddie pointed to his cheek, it didn't actually hurt there but surprise and intrigue pushed him to see how far he could go with this bit. 
And just like before Steve leaned down to plant a kiss on his cheek, though this one lingered maybe half a second longer than the other. 
"Now?"
He should have stopped there, lucky enough to get not one but two kisses from Steve Harrington, but Eddie was feeling extra brave today so after a second of staring up at Steves face he slowly brought his hand up and pointed toward his lips. 
He really should have stopped there but goddamnit, he had Steve Harrington in front of him there and oh my god he was leaning in again. 
Eddies brain practically short circuited as Steve gently brought a hand to the side of his face and gave him the most gentle, butterflies-in-the-stomach kiss he had ever gotten. 
"Now does it hurt?" 
"N-no." 
And with that he was walking away. Steve Harrington, who had just kissed Eddie because he asked, was walking away like nothing happened. 
Holy shit.
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ghostbsuter · 7 months
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Sometimes.
Just sometimes.
Bruce, tired father of too many children, wished for a small break.
Just a tiny one.
He pinched his nose, cowl covering his head and expression and glared.
"I can't believe you snitched on me!" Billy batson, freshly revealed teen and sitting on his usual spot during meetings, hisses.
"If I have to get parented, so do you!" Danny fenton, also freshly revealed teenager, glared right back.
"Boys." Both their attention snapped to wonder woman, still tense and warry.
"Do you two have adult supervision, at least." Batman asks, feeling slightly more drained than before, he can feel Nightwing's stare at the back of his head, coming closer.
"Do the voices count?" Danny asks, to which Billy nodded. "Yeah, do they? Zeus has strong opinions, and many kids. He probably can parent, somewhat."
They shrugged both, like they hadn't just opened another whole can of questions.
"Wait!" Danny snapped his fingers, "what about clocky? He sends us on time missions, has his own lair, and lets us hang around. That counts? Right?"
The other teen nods in agreement.
(Knowing both are black haired and blue-eyed teens, he already knows Dick will never let him live this down. Deceived by children, for YEARS.)
(So much for being the greatest detective.)
(The text he sent to Alfred is between him and his butler dad.)
"Or—"
In the end, the two agreed reluctantly to stay around for a while. The Kents, the Allens, Diana, and the Waynes have opened up their homes to house them permanently.
Much their amusement, they declared, that to make no one jealous, they'd switch homes every other week or so.
That alone smelled like chaos.
Whatever, it was Diana's first week.
(And if the house of mysteries appeared in front of them sometimes, that's also between them and a very suffering John constantine.)
.・゜-: ✧ :-
A continuation
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sevvnt · 6 months
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Icky ellie hcs
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definitely says "don't mind if I do" before taking a bite of food
the type of girl to say “this is awkward” in a quiet room
the type of person to say “me and you against the world🥰🥰”
her first relationship she def called you mi amor 😭
would defo text “my world🌍🌍🍯❤️” to you
the type to say “You mightttt.. want to see this..!!!🤓☝️” When there’s something on the news
She definitely the type of person to say “oopsie daisy”
she calls you m’lady
she the typa girl to go “ladies first” when opening the door for you
She’d be one of those girls that would throw her controller after losing a Fortnite match
the type to say “he’s right behind me isn’t he” when there’s a zombie
she’s the type of girl to say “I got it I got it!! I….don’t got it 😞” while tryna catch something
Ellie is the type to say “let’s dig in!” before eating
She starts floating when she smells pie
definitely says “I'm gonna feel that in the morning” when she gets hurt
“Listen here buddy”
definitely says cowabunga when she jumps into water
But it's ok because it's ellie!
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nariism · 6 months
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wriothesley isn't one for grand displays of affection, whether it be through his actions or his words.
to the public eye, the two of you are nothing more than co-workers who take their lunch break at the same time. two people who have something to discuss at 3:00 pm every day (which is coincidentally the time for his tea break, as many have pointed out).
you're the first one at his door with piles of paperwork when the morning shift starts. you're the last one out of his office at the end of the day.
to the rest of the fortress, your relationship is superficial—a rumour passed on from old inmates to new ones that the warden and his assistant are secretly married.
it's always laughed off the same way: why would they ever have a reason to keep that a secret?
it's become a sort of inside joke between the two of you since the silly rumour started floating around.
"i overheard some people in the cafeteria talking about us again."
"did you say anything to them?"
you smile, placing down two boxes of welfare meals on the desk. "why would i? it's more fun to let them believe what they want."
"it doesn't bother you?" wriothesley watches you from the corner of his eye as you open them, grimacing at your meal and your bad luck.
"not really," you say, looking at him curiously. "does it bother you?"
he snorts, uncrossing his arms so he can gather you into his arms for the first time since you dropped off papers in the morning.
"nah," he hums, burying his face into the crook of your neck—the place where he seeks solace first when holding you.
"you're crushing me," you laugh, allowing him to press you into the desk with his arms squeezing you terribly tight. you wheeze dramatically and he pulls away with a grumble.
"come on, let me have this. i haven't seen you since your shift started."
"that was only a few hours ago..."
he pouts. "so you didn't miss me?"
"i didn't say that." you pinch his nose and he engulfs you again under his weight, scooping you closer to him with his arms around your waist this time.
"imagine if one of your guards saw us like this. what would happen to this grand mystery surrounding our relationship?" you sigh, hopping up onto the desk while he slots himself comfortably between your legs.
wriothesley can only chuckle. "then you would owe me three hundred coupons."
"seriously? you still remember that bet?" it was made ages ago, after all. a wager that no one would find out the truth before the end of the year.
"aw, don't be such a poor sport. three hundred coupons is nothing. need i remind you that you're married to the warden?"
"no," you breathe, holding him by the cheeks so you can press your lips to the corner of his mouth. "i don't know where you heard that false rumour, by the way. did an inmate tell you?"
your teasing makes him roll his eyes. he tackles you into a hug again. "oh hush already."
turns out that some rumours really are true.
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© ALABOADOA 2023 — please do not translate or post my works to other platforms
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total-dxmure · 2 months
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ೃ࿔ CHERRY FLAVORED →【ELLIE WILLIAMS】→ CHAPTER ONE
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pairing: mega fan!ellie williams x rock star!reader
summary: your guitarist was carted off to rehab after just one month into your recent tour. fuck. there’s only one thing you can do, and that’s hire a replacement. your band thinks it’s going to be nearly impossible to find someone that is on the same level of talent as your “beloved” guitarist. you don’t have high hopes that anyone can nail the songs quite like he did either, if you’re being brutally honest. enter ellie- she’s a mega fan. the girl knows every lyric and note like the back of her hand. . . and everything about you, which isn’t creepy at all. her apparent obsession with you is something that you and your tour manager can overlook if it means carrying on with the rest of the tour. forced proximity with a stalker-level fan . . . what’s the worst thing that could happen?
warnings: smut in next chapter, talk of substance abuse, the reader is a tease and a bit of a bitch but it’s hot i promise, ellie is obsessed with reader to an unhealthy degree.
from the river to the sea, palestine will be free 🇵🇸 READ: this account stands with palestine, and so— i require everyone who interacts to educate themselves, and support/donate. READ THESE; 1 and 2, HELP HERE, BOYCOTT. silence is complicity, do not scroll past this. DO NOT BUY THE REMASTER, TLOU2, TLOU1, OR ANY GAME FROM NAUGHTY DOG! neil druckmann (the creator) is a zionist. PLEASE READ THIS. AND REBLOG THIS.
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It was the kind of love that tortured poets mused over. Ribs straining against a heavy heart. 
Ellie had deluded herself, as any love drunk person does, that she wouldn’t dissolve into a puddle on the floor if she were to meet you. She could keep her cool- downplay the crushing significance you held in her life. Your voice was constantly ringing in her ears. She could see your face in perfect clarity any time she closed her eyes. Pictures like snapshots played out behind her eyelids, and yet you always felt a million miles away for her. You were a perfect performer, situated on your sky-high pedestal, always out of her puny reach. 
Because Ellie, as much as she despised this fact and dreamed of greatness, was a nobody. She grew up in a tiny town of no noteworthiness, her adolescent years spent dreaming about the planets and playing guitar with Joel. By all accounts Ellie was normal, while you were certainly not. Still, she liked to tell herself that she’d somehow manage to make herself worthy of your affections if she were ever to be blessed with them. 
Finding herself in a situation like this seemed like an impossibility. She was partially convinced that she was daydreaming, having concocted some elaborate fantasy just to feed the insatiable ache. She was starved for you with no way to feed herself. 
All it had taken was a single audition tape. One. Single. Tape. Ellie was staring, wide eyed, at Gene fuckin’ Murray. 
The blood rushed from her head, hands breaking out instantaneously into a clammy sweat. She couldn’t think, couldn’t function at the realization that she was staring at one of the people that she had worshiped for years. Gene’s talent had been praised by the likes of Lars Ulrich and Danny Carey. He wasn’t popular just for his looks but for his undeniable talent. 
And he was staring straight at Ellie, arms crossed over his toned chest as he waited expectantly. She felt like an idiot. Should she be playing? If so, what did they want her to play? Surely one of their songs. She’d glossed past the fact that she was a megafan, instead making it sound like she was just looking for a successful band to join. She was talented. No, Ellie was really talented. 
She wasn’t just a technical player, but excelled at making her own rules. She enjoyed the creative freedom that playing the guitar granted, and felt as though the world needed more Jimi’s and Van Halen’s. Ellie excelled at thinking outside of the box. 
She wasn’t very successful when it came to women, but had no problem making her guitar scream and cry for her. 
She wasn’t very successful when it came to women, but had no problem making her guitar scream and cry for her. 
She wasn’t very successful when it came to women, but had no problem making her guitar scream and cry for her. 
So she took a deep breath and tried to steady her heart, once again stepping up to the mic. If there was one thing that all of your bandmates had in common, it was the attitude. She’d watched hundreds of interviews, had studied all of their movements and mannerisms. . .she understood you down to a science. 
“So do you want me to play or what?” Ellie spoke into the mic, gripping the neck of the guitar in the hopes that it might act as an anchor. She was scared that she might float away. 
The manager’s eyebrows twitched at her sudden change in attitude but he didn’t say anything, merely turned to look at Gene. For a second everyone just stared at her, like a bug under a microscope. After what felt like five minutes but was really just five seconds, Gene broke out into a grin, motioning to her with a flick of his wrist. He wasn’t confident in her, Ellie could tell. 
She had a sweet face, she knew that. Big green eyes and freckles- she was unsuspecting. People were usually shocked to find out that she had wrestled competitively in high school and had no problem putting a man three times her size on his ass. People expected very little from her, and perhaps that was part of Ellie’s real charm. 
“What song?” She was staring at Gene now, gripping her guitar pick between two sweat-slick fingers. 
“What ‘bout ‘Sometime Soon’? Know that one?” His tone was teasing. Condescending. 
The song was fast paced. It was supposed to be played loud and hard- one of your angrier songs. Ellie knew that you had been the one to write this one, meaning it was one of her favorites. The notes weren’t beginner friendly, but it wasn’t exactly hard for her. 
It was more style, less technical ability- which meant that Ellie would have no problem making this song her bitch. 
It was obvious that Gene was the one meant to judge her. The manager was just that- a manager. They needed an actual musician to listen in. So she took a deep breath and readied herself. . . 
and then the sound of your singing voice blasted into the booth. Drums, bass- she was meant to play with you. 
She almost missed her que, eyes widening in nervousness. She thought that she’d be playing all by her lonesome. She thought wrong it would seem. They’d started her off right in the middle of the song. Probably to throw her off. She jumped in, fingers sliding along the frets to shape out the correct notes. She tucked her guitar pick against the palm of her hand with her thumb, using the pads of her fingers to tap the strings. Faster. Faster. Faster. She didn’t look up from her guitar to look at the men’s reactions to her playing. Instead she just pretended she was standing in the living room of her apartment, hellbent on getting another noise complaint from the bitchy nextdoor neighbor. 
Her calloused fingers pinched the strings, satisfied with the way the guitar whined over the speakers. The guitar solo in this song was meant to be impressive- and it was, she had to give it to Leon. A lot of it was just bullshitting though. He’d admitted that he came up with the solo in the actual sound booth off of the top of his head while they were recording the song. 
The man was a god. He deserved “guitarist of the year” two years in a row. Ellie had the Los Angeles native beat though. Where he had grown up in the constant presence of “the greats”, Ellie had grown up in a constant state of boredom. She’d been playing the guitar since she was fourteen. Every day she’d sit down for hours and practice until her fingers bled. . . literally. She had thousands of hours on Leon, and she knew that with certainty. 
Ellie moved the guitar up and down gently with her fret hand, prolonging the last note so that it cried the way she wanted it to. The muscles in her arms were sore from how hard she had been tensing during the song. She’d been a lot more mechanical about it than she was used to, but she had something to prove. 
After a second she looked up from her guitar to gauge everyone’s reactions. The manager had dropped his cold and indifferent demeanor, instead flashing her a small smile. It bolstered her, gave her the strength to turn and look at Gene. 
He still had his arms crossed over his chest, and for a second Ellie was sure that he would tell her that she sucked. She widened her stance, shuffling her feet so that she was in a more defensive position. His heated gaze made her feel as though she needed to protect herself from whatever mental anguish he was about to put her through. 
“I thought she was kick ass,” Gene finally spoke up, giving Ellie a small thumbs up. Her face lit up into a wide smile before she could school her reaction into one of indifference. “What do you think? You’re the one that calls all the shots.” He spoke behind him, looking down at someone that had been hidden on the couch all along. 
Ellie squinted her eyes, taking a step closer to the glass to see if there was another businessman she’d somehow overlooked. 
She saw your hair before she saw anything else. It was freshly dyed, different than the last she’d seen you in all of the recent tabloid photos. You were clad in leather- pants so tight that they looked like a second skin. Your top was just as restrictive, breasts spilling out from the top, midriff revealed to show off the small silver piercing you had decorating your belly button. 
You were Hecate in the flesh- dark, sinister, mysterious and capable of anything. Ellie didn’t think that it would be possible, but you were even prettier in person. The sight of you sent a shock through her system, and for a second she felt her knees quiver, as if she could no longer hold up the weight of her own body. Her insides turned to mush; white, hot mush. 
The Stendhal syndrome: Ellie had been brought to the very precipice of existence by sight alone. She was so overcome by your mere existence that she felt her eyes begin to well up with tears. Body trembling, eyes locked on to your face and nothing else- it felt like she might faint. She remembered reading about the syndrome once before in an art history class she took in college. 
“Absorbed in the contemplation of sublime beauty. . . I reached the point where one encounters celestial sensations.” 
The urge to flee was just as great as the urge to get her hands on you was. She was thankful for the wide stance she was currently in, because if her legs had been any closer together then she was positive she would have lost her balance and fallen over. 
You were right there in front of her. You’d been right in front of her the entire time, she’d just been so focused on Gene that she hadn’t even seen you in her panic. She stumbled forward, her sneakered foot catching the jack for the amp. She slapped her hands over her ears as a blood curdling screech began blaring over the speakers. 
Ellie could have died. In fact. . . she just might. She dropped her guitar roughly on the ground as she raced over towards the amp, fingers shaking as she turned the knob to the volume.
The booth, once again, was silent. Silent enough to hear a pin drop. Slowly she turned, grimacing when she noticed the looks on everyone’s faces. She’d embarrassed herself and ruined her chance. Even worse was the fact that she’d humiliated herself in front of you. 
She had somehow deluded herself into believing that the two of you were soulmates over the years. She’d compared your birth charts, life numbers- had taken multiple celebrity compatibility tests. All signs pointed to a resounding yes. The two of you were star crossed lovers, cursed to never know one another. She had told herself that if she were ever to bump into you in person that she’d be able to keep her cool. Ellie was certain that she could pretend that she didn’t know who you are- could downplay the significance that you held  
Her ignorance was laughable. She’d been so overcome by your mere presence that she’d stumbled on air while standing completely still. You were standing up straight now, and even from her spot behind the thick glass she could tell how much taller you were than her. You had to be wearing heels or platforms, because according to Google you were- 
“You know how many auditions we’ve listened to today?” You had grappled the mic from the tech and were now hunched over his soundboard, the lights from all of the buttons and knobs casting strange, beautiful shadows over your face. Your eyeliner was dark and smoked out around your eyes, and in that moment Ellie wondered if you were an angel or a demon. “Twelve. Twelve fuckin’ people have walked into that booth today. Every single one of them has been absolute shit. So bad, in fact, that I’ve wanted to blow my fuckin’ brains out in this buildings tiny, piss-stained bathroom.” 
Ellie blanched, lips losing their pink color as the blood drained from her face. She was about to pass out. Her vision was already starting to tunnel. She grabbed onto one of the microphone stands to hold herself up, trying to keep her expression hard and unreadable. People often told her that she had “dead eyes”, and she could only pray that her face wasn’t giving her crushing grief away. It felt like someone had just died; like she had just died. Actually, she would have rather you just go ahead and stab her then tell her she sucked. You were her idol, her dream girl, her everything. 
And you were telling her that you’d rather blow your fucking brains out then listen to her play. How was she supposed to recover from this? She’d heard the saying “don’t meet your heroes” a thousand times, but this? She’d rather you just be a bitch to her. Actually, Ellie would probably like that. This was the worst thing she could have ever heard. Her nose twitched as tears began pooling in her eyes. She blinked a few times, praying that you couldn’t tell in the nearly pitch black room you were standing in. 
“But this?” You turned towards your manager and pointed passionately at Ellie. “This is music.” 
Breath left her lungs in a loud, audible whooshing sound, like a balloon deflating. Her shoulders relaxed, the hand that was white knuckling the mic stand falling limp at her side. No, you didn’t hate her. You liked her. 
You liked her. 
Everyone had their vices. Leon’s had, apparently, been copious amounts of prescription drugs- often consumed simultaneously. You were used to getting what you wanted. You drank whenever you wanted to, fucked just about anyone that peaked your interest and got away with your usual rotten antics and bitchy behavior. You lived the lifestyle that you’d always dreamt of, even when you were a little kid. 
You enjoyed putting on shows. You were flamboyant, loud, and weren’t afraid of expressing yourself. Teachers often described you as a “free thinker” back in your elementary school days. You dressed yourself for school each morning, each outfit louder and more daring than the next. You were an artist, and like most artists you had some inner demons that you fought against. You still fought tooth and nail, even to this day. 
Finally though, after what felt like a thousand years of waiting and biding your time, you had the life you had always yearned for. 
You sold out arenas, appeared on the front page of just about every magazine imaginable, and had celebrities clamoring over themselves to be your “best friend” of the week. Things were good. 
But also a bit empty. 
The friends that you’d made in your youth only used your name for bragging rights. Your parents had stopped showing up to concerts years ago, instead choosing to listen about your successes through their shitty television shows. Life felt a bit hollow.
Exciting. . . just different than you had always been used to. 
“Come play with us.” One of the women whined from her spot on your plush hotel mattress. The bombshell blonde was already stripped down to her underwear, her eyes glazed over from whatever overpriced alcohol she’d already taken from the suite's bar, at your expense no doubt. 
Your manager was used to the up-charges on the company card. He would probably be relieved in the morning when he found out that you didn’t break anything. There was still time for that, of course. It was only one in the morning, which meant you had nine more hours to get fucked up and wreck the cushy room. 
“I’m not feeling up to it right now.” You said simply, already disinterested in the two women you had invited to bed with you tonight. You were holding a beer bottle loosely between two of your fingers, swishing the remainder of the room temperature alcohol absentmindedly.
You weren’t much of an “observer” when it came to sex, more of a very active participant. Still, all you could do was sit back in one of the comfortable lounge chairs, muscles tense after a long show. You weren’t exactly sure why you’d invited the women back to the hotel. They were both attractive and had come onto you at the same time. It was obvious what they had been insinuating, and who were you to deny two beautiful women? The first thing that had popped into your head being “a threesome might make me happy”.
Except now you were bored out of your skull and would much rather be sleeping right now than watch two ditzy girls clumsily fondle each other’s fake breasts. 
“Please? I want you to fuck me so bad-” There was a knock at the door, causing both girls to go silent for a second. 
You pinched the bridge of your nose, exhaustion threatening to swallow you up whole. If it was your manager here to yell at you for “accidentally” breaking an amp at tonight's show you were going to scream. It was too late for that bullshit. Still, you saw this excuse as a blessing. 
“Hear that, ladies? Looks like we’ve gotta pack it up. Thanks for showing me a good time.” You stood up from the seat with a small groan, placing your beer bottle onto the counter clumsily. The glass clattered, almost spilling all over the shag carpet. 
The two girls groaned, obviously frustrated that they hadn’t successfully gotten you into bed with them. You weren’t sure what was wrong with you lately. If this had happened a few months ago then. . . well, you would have fucked them- no questions asked. Were you maturing out of your “wild and crazy” phase? No, you didn’t think so. 
You bent down, scooping up a discarded bra so that you could toss it onto the bed. Fabric rustled behind you as they began to quickly sort themselves out, hoping to beat you to the door. 
“Who is it?” You called out in a sing-song voice, deciding that if your manager was already angry enough to show up in front of your door at one in the morning then you might as well have a little fun with it. 
There was no reply on the other side of the door, causing you to scoff. He was giving you the silent treatment. You reached out for the door handle, only to have your shirt yanked on by one of the women. You could hear the seams ripping against the weight of her, her eyes wide with desperation. 
“Please let me show you a good time. I promise I’m good- I swear.” There was a fear of rejection there, you could tell. 
You felt a bit guilty and were quick to lean in to press a kiss on her cheek. “Baby, you’re gorgeous. I’m sure you would have been wonderful- but I’m tired. That’s all, okay? It’s nothing personal.” 
And with that you opened the door. The air from the hallway was brisk, causing goosebumps to instantly break out on your bare arms and legs. You were expecting the balding, bespectacled Barry to be standing on the other side of the door, all in a huff about “expenses” and “damages to the venue”. Blah, blah, blah. 
Instead it was Ellie. A very broken looking Ellie. 
The girls were quick to straighten out their outfits, their attention now turned towards the guitarist. Groupies like this didn’t care who they slept with, just so long as they were getting it in with someone that was in the band. 
“You’re Emma. . . right? The new guitarist? You were so great tonight. I mean- Leon was always a bit of a poser anyway. You’re killing it.” One of the girls started, moving to stand next to you in the doorway. 
You weren’t sure why, but you felt angry. Genuinely angry. Were you jealous of Ellie? No, because you were sure they would still rather fuck you than her. You’d been their first choice, afterall. Maybe you felt the need to shelter Ellie a bit? Yeah, that had to be it. She was still learning the ropes, and the last thing she needed was to be sexually harassed in a hotel hallway.
“. . . -lie” She was mumbling under her breath, eyes locked on the expensive carpet beneath her ratty old sneakers. 
She had changed out of her stage clothes and put on jeans and a t-shirt. Her hair looked wet too, meaning she’d already taken a shower. She smelled earthy- Alpine, even. 
You leaned against the frame, slamming your hand against the doorway to box the two women in, hoping to keep them away from the newbie. They flinched but both seemingly weren’t off put in their newfound pursuit. 
“You’re the most talented guitarist I’ve ever seen live. I mean. . . your solos were incredible.” You hadn’t managed to successfully remember the girl’s names. Just that they were friends with two guys that had worked security for the venue tonight. People often took advantage of connections like that in order to get close to you and your bandmates. It usually worked too. Tonight was different though. Tonight you had a real stick up your ass. 
Ashley? Amber? Sophie? God, you were bad with names.
“. . . -is Ellie.” Your guitarist mumbled again, slowly moving back down the hall in the direction of her suite. 
Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion over her attitude, and you were quick to stumble out of your room and down the hall after her. 
“Wait! Emma, can we get an autograph!” One of the half naked girls called after the two of you, trying desperately to shrug on her shirt to follow after. 
Ellie turned then, eyes narrowed and teeth bared. You’d. . . You’d never seen her like that before. 
“My name is fucking Ellie! Who is Emma? Jesus fuckin’ Christ-” She dug her hand into the back pocket of her jeans, trying desperately to find her keycard. 
The girls gasped at her outburst, jostled by the look of pure evil on her face. Even you were taken aback, not used to this kind of attitude from her. Still, you’d be lying if you said that you didn’t know why she was acting like this. 
Ellie was what some would call a “mega fan”, though that would be putting it lightly. The word “stalker” would be more appropriate. Your manager knew that before he even messaged her for an audition. He’d checked all of her social media sites and scrubbed the internet for anything he could find on her. One thing was made very clear: 
Ellie was obsessed with you. 
For whatever reason she seemed to be keeping it a secret from Gene and Chris. All she fessed up to them was that she enjoyed your music, which was why she’d auditioned in the first place. She’d conveniently left out the dedicated fan blogs and the status of her cult-like following.
You didn’t mind it. Sure, it was a bit creepy. . . but she was talented and you liked her. She could hold her own against Gene and Chris’ constant asshole behavior, and had been receptive to Barry trying to teach her the ropes of the business. It was obvious that she wanted this, even if her motives weren’t exactly purely for the music. You’d let her be as close to you as she wanted if it meant that she’d continue playing the way that she does. The crowd had loved her, and it was only her second show with the band. 
She was a bit shy, but that would pass eventually. You remember your early debut days vividly. You’d been just like her, maybe even a little worse. 
“Hey, stop for a second.” You reached out to grab her wrist, stopping her from fleeing after her outburst. She turned to glare at you, but her eyes softened as she took in your features. 
You could feel her arm trembling in your grasp, so you gently let go. No matter how many times you touched her or spent time with her, she still seemed to get overly nervous in your presence. It was endearing. 
“Aren’t you a bit busy? Don’t let me ruin your fun-” She was being sarcastic. 
“I was done with them by the time you knocked on the door. They aren’t exactly my type. I’m not sure why I even invited them back in the first place.” If you had to guess, you’d probably done it out of habit. You were used to inviting people back to your room or tour bus. 
Ellie didn’t seem pleased by your answer. If anything it seemed to upset her even more. She bristled, reaching back into her pocket for her keycard. What did she want to hear? That you hadn’t touched them? You groaned, wiping an exhausted hand down your face. 
The elevator dinged behind you, meaning the girls had finally taken the hint and were leaving with their tails tucked between their legs. 
“Are you jealous or something?” You asked once the elevator doors were closed. The last thing you needed were the girls trying to sell information to some shitty gossip magazine. 
She froze, eyes going wide and lips going pale. It was almost like she didn’t think that you knew all about her dirty little secret. A part of you wanted to tease her. Really make her squirm. 
“Why would I be jealous? Those girls weren’t exactly my type either.” She was good at playing things off. Ellie was a good liar. 
But you were good at sniffing out the bullshit. It was one of your many talents. 
“Not of me,” You leaned against the wall next to her door, watching with curious eyes as she began fumbling in her pockets for her key. “Of them. Do you wish I had taken you back to my room or something?” You cooed flirtatiously, flashing her one of your most sinister smiles. 
She coughed, turning around so that she could hide her face from you. This nearly had you groaning out loud in disappointment. Was she blushing? Do her freckles look even brighter when her skin gets all pink and hot? 
Nah, it was dangerous to think like this. Band members were always off limits. It was a recipe for disaster. The last thing you needed was another Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham situation on your hands. Your PR team wouldn’t be able to recover. They’d just barely gotten over the “Leon” incident by the skin of their teeth. 
Your old band member having to be tackled by three cops in a hotel lobby was horrible. It made you look sloppy. And sleeping with the brand new edition to the band was definitely sloppy. 
“You’re acting crazy.” Ellie told you, shoving the keycard into the lock so that she could clammer into her room. 
Pushing the boundaries was sort of your thing. You enjoyed being bad, fuck the consequences. Right about now you wanted to kiss Ellie. What would her reaction be? Was she a good kisser? You wanted to know. No- you needed to know. 
“You’re right. I’m talking nonsense, don’t listen to me,” You called after her into the room. “Sweet dreams.” 
And with that you sauntered back to your own room, practically purring in delight over the fact that it had been that easy to get to Ellie like that. You loved pushing the boundaries. . . and now you had a new toy to play with.
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inf3ct3dd · 7 months
Text
ellie headcanons pt.2! :))
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warnings: mentions of weed/alc , injuries/blood, VERY mild sexual content (boobs and ass 😕)
content: loser!ellie x reader :3
authors note: im back w another BANGER🔥🔥🔥 since ppl loved the last one IM BACK W MORE 😈
pt. 1 ! taglist.! masterlist!!
- CANNOT handle spicy food. my porcelain princess has the spice tolerance of a victorian child she is coughing and crying at the slightest spice 😞😞
- speaking of food…my girl is a CHEF!!! she hates leaving the house and she’s too broke to buy food so she’s just in the kitchen whippin ts!!!! she even has a goofy chef hat that she wears when she cooks. (this is so ellie coded i dont know why)
- loves commentary youtubers . kurtis,danny,nickisnotgreen,jarvis, and chadchad 🔥🔥
- knows so much niche internet drama…she tries to talk abt it and ur like???? literally what are you talking about….which gives her the perfect opportunity to ramble
- so many random injuries CONSTANTLY. she’s constantly covered in cuts and bruises and has no idea where they come from (mostly her awful skateboarding)
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- “this ones for you” before she devastatingly fails to do a trick on her skateboard and falls on her face, and her entire lower face is covered in nose-blood
- whenever she gets hurt, she always asks you to “kiss it better” 😞😞 so cute im dying!!!
- follows you around like a puppy all day. goes with you on all your errands, sits by you while you do work. she is ALWAYS THERE
- if u think shes bad when shes sober, she’s literally the clingiest drunk in the world!!!! she will literally be constantly attached to you. even when you go to the bathroom, she’ll literally hold ur hand through the door while u piss cuz u wouldn’t let her in 😞
- she’s even worse when she’s high, cuz shes so BOLD. will literally just randomly motorboat ur tits while ur talking with zero explanation.
- loves sitting on the floor???? literally will just be down there. sometimes when you’re on the couch she’ll sit by your feet and cling onto one of your legs
- NEEDY!!!! oh my godddd so needy. every time ur doing something not involving her she’s trying to get your attention. most of the time shes doing really stupid shit in front of you for no reason. “babe look” is her favorite thing to say
- literally had a huge bruise on her leg cuz she tried to do a cartwheel inside and banged her leg on the kitchen counter
- whenever you lay on your stomach, she loves laying her head on your ass
“it’s my favorite pillow!!”
- sometimes she just randomly squeezes ur boobs when she walks past you. always with some random sound affect too. she’ll just walk by you while you’re cooking and just honk ‘em 😕
- sleeps DIRECTLY ON TOP OF YOU. like literally lays on you like a starfish all night
-sleeptalker!!! its always the most non-coherent things ever, and it’ll last for like 30 minutes.
“no papa john i don’t wanna hit a nae nae 😞”
- cannot be trusted on the road. she is actually a hazard to public safety
- this is such an unpopular opinion but she is DEFINITELY a passenger princess. she likes staring at you too much she can’t drive she’ll crash!!!!
- does NOT exercise. but she’s like. randomly strong. she’ll carry all your groceries in one trip and push ALL your luggage when you go on vacation
- literally turns into a child when you take her to the beach. building sand castles, swimming in the water, and finding rocks and shells and bringing them to you like a dog
- definitely wears those stupid snorkel goggles when she goes swimming cuz she likes doing flips underwater and hates water in her nose
- LOVES CAMPING!!! that girl can be OUTDOORS.
- has binders full of pokemon cards. she goes to this card shop by her house that has pokemon saturdays and plays matches for like…the whole day. she can and WILL trash talk a 7 year old little boy after beating him
- follows so many niche meme pages
- orange chicken enthusiast.
- this is literally canon in the show but she HATES COFFEE. she is a chai latte woman. with oatmilk cuz like…duh….lesbian
- absolutely goated at just dance for NO REASON
- really good at making string friendship bracelets
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