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reversemoon255 · 3 years

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(From September 2020 to February 2021, I worked on a Pokémon themed Dungeons and Dragons campaign for a few friends. We didn’t get very far, but I put a significant amount of work into the world, story, and several Pokémon that would appear throughout, including an original set of starters. I want to to leave some record of my work, so I thought I’d write a few summary posts. And while I designed these Pokémon, their fantastic art was done by @extyrannomon on Twitter. I highly recommend you check them out.)

Dungeons 'n' Dragonites - Phase 1: Hello Stelopy City

Our story starts in Stelopy City, located in the Wellou Region. We get a brief introduction from DJ Tomomitsu, a radio host, before each player got their own brief story segments. Our first player was Ethan, as aspiring chef, who lived on campus at his high school. Ethan was approached by one of his dorm mates with a favor (to get him out of the building), as well as having an attractive girl meandering around the kitchen (if he wished to try flaunting his culinary skills). He would then get to choose to either finish up his side-quest or go to the local fisher's market, with him transitioning between those locations taking him to the area where he would meet his starter Pokémon:

"As you enter the alleyway, the walls are covered floor-to-ceiling in moss that seem to appear as soon as the shadows overtake the sunlight. The farther you walk, the more weeds you see popping through the cracks. Once you reach the half-way point, you come to a small open space. With the sunlight now flickering down through the plants brave enough to venture off the verdant walls, the entire area shines a bright, emerald green. In the center of this area is a decently sized fountain. It's no longer flowing, but there's a decent amount of rain water filling it up close to the brim. As you approach it, even through the murky iridescent waters, you can see a thick, fuzzy amount of lichen growing all throughout the inside of the basin. As you pass by the fountain, you hear an audible sploosh. Do you turn around? (Y/N)"

There he would meet the first of our new Starter, the Grass-Type Flymph. I kept it secret that I was doing original Starters. Part of my personal excitement in planning everything was the eventual reveal of these designs I had created. Kept me going when things started feeling like a grind.

Our second player, Johnny, started off at home, woken by his father asking him to run an errand. After being able to talk to his family a bit, he proceeded to a somewhat beaten-up house on the edge of the Pokémon-overrun abandoned district where he would receive some boat parts before leaving and the sidewalk underneath him collapses. Stumbling around the abandoned subway tunnels for a bit, he would run into our second Starter, the Fire-Type Calfyre.

Johnny's player wanted to become an entertainer, which didn't give me a lot to work session one, so a lot of his opener was focused on expanding the world and giving everyone an idea of areas they would be exploring later.

Third was Orion who had a quiet morning at home before being provoked via text messages from his siblings to chase down a mysterious "Wailord in a Top Hat." This pursuit would also lead him to the fisher's market and the nearby docks, where, after just catching sight of his quarry, he would encounter the Water-Starter Squisque.

Orion's player wanted a lot of his story to be based on his relationship with his father, so most of his opening was based on reinforcing his family dynamic. Not home, everyone’s busy, focus on work. This particular Saturday was strange in that Orion didn’t have anything going on.

Our last player was Arthur, who also lived on campus. While our other three players started their segments in bed, Arthur was playing lacrosse. After having an opportunity to show off (or fail), he would be told by a friend that he had upset his girlfriend that morning (kitchen girl from Ethan's story), and needed Arthur to pick up her favorite dessert while he attempted to woo her for the rest of the day. After doing so (while being given a chance to explore some of the local stores) he encountered a hungry Houndoom who proceeds to chase him up a fire escape. Once up there he encountered our final Starter, the Fairy-Type Utaw.

After each player met their Starters, they would have a brief tutorial battle against three Pokémon they were advantageous against before running into each other, and were subsequently arrested for "stealing" Pokémon, which would cap session one.

=====

Let's talk design. Stelopy City is loosely based on Chicago, is a portmanteau of "Steel Canopy," and Wellou is a joke on Illinois. The vast majority of the campaign was to take place in this location. Most of my players had very busy schedules (so busy it took us three sessions to get through the above opener), so DJ Tomomitsu was a way for me to easily start each session with a list of things to do (side-quests), and they as a group could decide which they were the most interested in based on time. Tomomitsu himself was based on DJ Sagara from Kamen Rider Gaim, with Tomomitsu being the name of the actor who played him.

As for the starters, I tried to stick to the reoccurring themes we’ve seen over the past 8 Generations. Flymph's name is a portmanteau of Dragonfly, Errol Flynn, and Nymph (the larval form of a Dragonfly). He's meant to be a special attacker, but, like an early DND Wizard, doesn't have access to a lot of them so he brandishes his sword-like arms to intimidate his foes instead. His diet consists entirely of lichens, algae, and similar flora, storing them in his transparent stomach pouches, and can be seen sunbathing in the water, belly up, feeding the plant matter the sunlight they need to grow. He also does not like Bug-Types, and isn’t Bug himself because of Grass/Bug’s myriad of weaknesses (for balancing), plus he changes Types after his first evolution. The theme of Grass Starters is extinction, which won’t become clear until his final evolution, but you may be able to guess how he relates.

Fire Starters are themed after the Chinese Zodiac, and of the remaining four yet to be used (including Snake, Ram, and Horse), I went with Ox. Calfyre's name is a play on Calf and Fire, and is meant to play like a Barbarian. When it comes to personality he's very timid and unsure of himself like a first-time DND player might be acting in a group. Unlike most Fire-Types, Calfyre lacks a Flame Sac. Instead, his spiral horns are filled with a freon-like liquid that, when swirled, rapidly absorbs energy from the air, which he uses for attacks. This chills the air around him, and makes him one of the few Fire-Types that are cold to the touch. Which sucks, because he’s a snugly sleeper.

Water Starters are usually themed after a weapon or character class. This usually shows in the later evolutions, but it's pretty obvious Squisque (a portmanteau of Squirt, Squire, and Bisque) is themed off a lance and shield. He's a paladin in both role and personality, charging in at the slightest sign of trouble, even if there isn't any real danger. It's the typical non-nuanced idea of what people think when they hear "Paladin." He was to a degree supposed to play a catalyst role, charging into situations the players may not want to in order to force them into helping people or combat if need be. He was also the first design I settled on, being based on an old Kaijin idea I had of a lobster-knight using its asymmetrical claws as different medieval weapons.

Utaw is unique, not just in that he was a fourth or Fairy Starter, but in conception. I was only supposed to have three players, but ended up with four. As such, his design is responsive to the others. Why a dinosaur? Because I had a mammal, crustacean, and bug, was unsure if I wanted a bird or reptile, and decided to meet half-way. Why is he Fairy? Because it has very little interaction with Fire, Water, and Grass, while still having defined weaknesses and resistances to certain types. (Also, this player wanted a Dragon-Type.) He’s based on a Utahraptor, hence the name, and is misspelled to include “Claw” or “Caw.” He’s meant to play team Bard, and uses sound moves. As for personality, he's a bit of a birdbrain who enjoys fighting. Not maliciously; it’s just fun, again acting like a new DND player who’s more interested in combat than role playing.

The idea with the personalities was that each Pokémon was supposed to start out like a rookie DND player on their first campaign. Not knowing how to play their class, being uncomfortable acting in front of a group, leaning too hard into your role without bending, or just fighting everything you see without diplomacy. It felt like a fun extra layer to each of these Pokémon that tied them just as much into the DND side of things as the Pokémon.

=====

Back to our story, after being briefly detained (mostly as an excuse to give the players time to introduce themselves to each other, something my DMs have struggled with), they meet Professor(-in-training) Bianca. The four Pokémon had been found by Silph Co., and had decided to donate them to the Unovan Pokémon Research Lab. However, after seeing the Pokémon interacting with these people, Bianca decides to give them up instead. "Pokémon should be with people," after all.

I had three side quests set up following this (after they all go to the DMV to get their Trainer's licenses). The first was a general "there's wild Pokémon here" quest where they could train and catch things. There was a sale at the mall where they could get some cheap held items and have their first trainer battle, and an event at the fisher's market where they could win some free items and would lead into their first dungeon.

The dungeon was what I was hoping they would pick, and would have them chase a group of Poipole through a warehouse, with them having different battles if they chose to enter from the front or the back. After defeating them, the Poipole would be sucked through a spontaneously generating Ultra Wormhole, with a high enough perception check revealing a strange laugh, or on a 20 have them catch a glimpse of a grey Charizard O_O

From there it was a matter of coming up with (or possibly recycling unused) side-quests until we reached the point where the Starters were about to evolve. I had a few things planned; introductions to a few reoccurring NPCs, a field trip to the local museum where they would be able to catch a Yamask (and possibly learn something about the origins of their Starters), and a raid battle against a group of Onix who would recur through the campaign.

The end of Phase 1 would come about with another dungeon. In the middle of the night, Ethan and Arthur would be awoken by their Pokémon to a group of Durant having busted through the floor of the dorm and raiding their kitchen. Easily driving them off, their Pokémon would encourage them to pursue. Later, full party in toe, the four of them would explore the Duranthill. There would be a number of possible encounters, but only one mandatory fight before reaching the depths. In said encounter, while being surrounded by a group of Durant, they would receive unexpected help from this Pokémon:

With some interpretation, they would discover that this Princess Durant was afraid for the sake of her colony. A new queen had taken up residence there, and was commanding the Durant to attack the surface and steal food for her. With additional party member in toe, they would descend further with better direction, eventually discovering the lair of the Queen Durant...

#Pokemon #Dungeons and Dragons #DND #DND Homebrew #durant

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photolover82 · 3 years

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Masked Singer Season 5 Episode 3 Recap: Group A Returns With a Wildcard (Commentary & Guesses)

Hi guys! Welcome or welcome back to Ana’s Masked Singer recap, where I, Ana, recap every single episode of The Masked Singer. Ok, so I'm on time this time I swear (I try to do these the weekend after the show airs or Friday), and now we are starting to get the wildcards which was super exciting and Joel Mchale was guest judging so it was a very fun episode to watch! We’re back onto Group A but this time someone new joins the group, so stay tuned until the end to talk about that someone. Anyways, let’s get into it, starting with the eliminated contestant:

So the eliminated mask was...

*DRUMROLL PLEASE*

The Raccoon 🦝

Commentary: honestly, I am not even the slightest bit surprised that he got eliminated... he should have gone home earlier but that’s neither here nor there, the Masked Singer likes to do that to us so whatever. But like honestly this is gonna sound mean, and look, not everyone is a singer, and he gave it the good old college try and I respect the hell out of that, but omg all I gotta say about his performance of Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash is yikes. That’s it, that’s all I gotta say about that... anyways, let’s reveal this rodent or mammal, idk man who told you guys I was an animal expert?!

Raccoon was revealed to be (I got this one too yay!)

Danny Trejo

Yeah, I guessed it baby! I even have proof, just look at my 1st recap of the season and it’s there, I got it! Yayyy! Anyways, I mean I know him, I have seen him around ofc (he has done a lot of acting and he even has a restaurant and everything), but like he can’t sing and that’s ok, he had fun, it’s what matters. Good job Danny Trejo and thank God he’s gone because finally my ears can be in peace.

Having said that, let’s move onto our remaining 4 (yes, 4 because wildcard baby!):

1. Seashell 🐚

Commentary: Her performance of Confident by Demi Lovato was to me much better than her last performance. It seemed like she was more confident (hehe no pun intended) in this one, kind of came into her own and let out the power in her voice. She was a bit timid and nervous in the first performance and it kind of reminded me of how Jellyfish started out, but this one was a lot more diva and powerful, I enjoyed it a lot. I really love Seashell, she is quickly becoming one of my favorite contestants (except nobody can beat my favorite who you will see in a moment)

I am doubling down on my guess:

Tamera Mowry

Clues/Reasoning: ok, like this one I feel super confident about and the clues kind of seal the deal for me:

The doodle of “Seashell with the shell mask on”= reference to the intro of Sister Sister

A certain shell man asked her out and the baseball on the screen= she is talking about her husband, Fox News correspondent Adam Housley (which btw is another reason why she is on this show, bc it runs in the Fox family), who used to be a professional baseball player (oh and the required her to do things she was scared of means that he helped her feel more comfortable about being on TV aka when she was on the Real)

2 minute stopwatch= she’s older than her twin sister, Tia, by 2 minutes haha 😂 (this was a very weird thing to be like yeah bro ik that... again I say, Google is a magical thing)

2. Robopine 🦔

Commentary: He sang All of Me by John Legend and honestly song choice was 👌, like I would have picked that for him too. It was absolutely stunning and I can just close my eyes and enjoy the song, which that’s what some of the best ballad performances tend to do. I absolutely loved it, he is my favorite, if you can’t tell, and this was my favorite performance of the night. I have a prediction that Robopine might make it to the finals honestly because he is just that amazing.

I am changing my guess and I am more confident now with:

Tyrese Gibson

Reasoning/Clues: alright so I know that he isn’t 60 but I have a feeling he is lying about that and that he’s from Costa Rica (that’s too direct of a clue to be true you know and I feel like he is lying... Ken did say in the beginning that Robopine is the most confusing, so I do think that he is lying)... anyways clue time:

A lot of superhero clues= he will be playing one in Jared Leto’s Morbius film from Marvel

The lying means something = he has an album called Alter Ego, someone in the YouTube comments told me that he did a shoot with GQ called “60 the new 30” so that’s where the age thing might come from

IT SOUNDS A LOT LIKE HIM, OK?! Legit this is the most logic bomb I can give you right here... he’s trying to fool us but the voice is what matters... if you wanna compare voices go ahead, here’s a video that can help (it helped me even though the background singers kinda took over, but you get the point, it was live)

youtube

3. Russian Dolls 🪆

Commentary: THEY DIVIDEDDDDD... omg there’s 3 now! I FREAKING CALLED IT!! Anyways, they sang Wonder by Shawn Mendes and again I say their harmonies are so on point, it’s fantastic! I throughly enjoyed this performance, it was great! Their voices work really great together (ofc duh because they are a band... they have to be) and it was a really great song choice as well.

Again, I am gonna double down here (and them being 3 makes it even more convincing for me):

Hanson (All 3 of them this time)

Reasoning/Clues: ok, so now that there’s 3 of them, I don’t have to sound dumb and be like ummmmm it’s 2 of the Hanson brothers, which two I am not sure, but two of them. This time I can say it is all of Hanson, all 3 of them! WOOO! This performance really solidified it for me. Anyways, here are the logic bombs aka clues:

He was doing what he loved and rushed to the hospital = Zac, one of the brothers, was involved in a motorcycle accident in which he (get this, it’s really bad like reading it on Google made me go ouch that must have been a terrible accident) broke three ribs, his collarbone, and scapula.

The fire truck= the fire department was involved in the accident, which he spoke about in October 2019

4. Surprise! It’s Wildcard Time: Introducing the Orca (whale) 🐳

Commentary: ok, so he performed We’re Not Gonna Take It by Twisted Sister, and it was meh, it was ok. He sounds like a comedian, and his voice is so familiar, it’s killing me. Anyways, he is talk singing the entire time and there are parts where he sounds out of breath, so I don’t think he is a professional singer. The costume though (since I couldn’t really review that beforehand) looks like a pool floatie on top and a blue version of Banana from season 3 from the chest down, which is kind of cool (I would give it a 8/10 if I were to rate it). I really love that top head part, it looks super great, the costume designers killed it.

Ok, this one I am more unsure about but I am gonna say that I am between these 2:

Bill Burr or Adam Sandler

(Burr is the one pictured below, couldn’t put both images because Tumblr doesn’t let me do more than 10 pictures so just pretend you can also see Adam Sandler’s photo)

Reasoning/Clues: I am gonna have to skip this one... because I am not sure about this one, I am just going off of voice, the clues confuse me, but you have any ideas, feel free to comment them please, I need all the help I can get.

So that’s it, wildcard and all. I hope you guys enjoyed this, I am so sorry for the picture issue, it’s something that bugs me about Tumblr but whatever. I will see you guys in the next one, where we will see Group B sans Phoenix perform and add in a new wildcard, which omg I know who it is I just don’t know what it looks like, but it is the CRAB 🦀! Anyways, I will see you all next weekend, please like, comment, do all the social media things! Bye everyone! 👋🏼

#the masked singer #themaskedsinger #celebrities #music #the masked singer season 5 #hollywood

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agarbagebagofhumanteeth · 3 years

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I've been seeing your tags for a while and I'm really curious now. Might we have a brief overview of your tags/what they mean? 👀

OH NO, I made my tags with the assumption that no one but me would ever look at them 🤣

ANIMAL TAGS

- i just think its neat is used for arthropods, which is why it’s usually coupled with bug or spider tws

- love this whoreis for marine animals, based on this post

- just little guys is mooostly for small mammals, but also people and things I consider small-mammal-esque

CHARACTER TAGS are mostly from The Magnus Archives lol

- i love this horrible bastard man is for Elias Bouchard

- worm wife is for Jane Prentiss

- my idiot meat son is for Jared Hopworth

- the corruption is shaped like a friend and the flesh is doing its best are both for abstract fear manifestations as described in TMA

- an enemy man is for my “main” OC, a Jack the Ripper riff originally from a freeform RP. I have an aesthetic side blog for him!

REAL PEOPLE TAGS

- it do be that way is used for posts that apply to me personally, so i don’t annoy anyone by tagging them “me” or whatever

- tiny goth rights is also a personal tag, but for posts that apply to me specifically because I’m short and/or gothy, haha

- James is my husband, who shows up in various tags. If I don’t want him to look at something, it’s because it contains spoilers for something I’ve finished but he hasn’t

- Puffball is my almost-three-year-old daughter, so that puffball is for stuff about her and also general human baby content

- Relatedly, not that puffball is for fungus posts

- kisses for the lita gang is for the other players of the freeform RP mentioned above

OTHER TAGS

- *a skeleton floats across the blog* was originally a tag for House on Haunted Hill, my favorite movie, but has become my general horror tag

- drr drr drr is a sound effect from the horror manga “Horror of Amigara Fault,” but I don’t know why it has its own tag instead of using the skeleton one, haha

- *bats eyelashes* is for reblog bait

- east marshes is the d&d campaign I’m currently DMing, a hex crawl set in a big swamp. Some of my players are moots, so I only post fake spoilers here.

I thiiink that’s all the inscrutable ones, but please feel free to send another ask if there’s still anything you’re wondering about

#talkin trash #thats for asks and stuff i guess #but this is the first ask ive ever gotten haha #james dont look #probably

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cycloplasm · 3 years

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🌸 Bloodlime 🖤

😏😏😏🧛🏻‍♂️🎸💖🖤*cool heavy metal riff*

🌸 What are some of their favourite things and why? List as many as you can think of!

• METAAAAL!! Any kind tbh, except for super rude/gross songs and ones about killing vampires.

•... blood... lol. Well he is a mosquito vampire and can’t eat/drink anything else so he doesn’t really have a choice. No idea if he has favorites types of blood though- but (fruit) bug, NPC and player blood definitely have different tastes. I think he likes player blood the least though- probably is copper-y while fruitbug blood is, well, fruity lol.

• Bloodlime kind of loves most of Halloween and horror- even if it doesn’t involve vampires (though his fav content is definitely vampire content). He even likes the kiddy stuff, even if it’s not his cup of tea- Bloodlime doesn’t like children but he’s glad they can have horror too, and a safe one at that. Like metal he only doesn’t like the rude/gross types of horror/halloween and the thrill kind of horror (read: jumpscares and bad edgy horror). And when it comes to vampire horror, Bloodlime loves almost everything, from classics to new, original interpretations; again he just dislikes the gross stuff- and especially sensual vampire movies. He, quote, ‘thinks that mammal anatomy and their methods of fornication are beyond repulsive’. The mere fact that Bloodlime knows about these is concerning, if you consider the implication that the in-universe Fruitbugs creator himself knows about these and thought it would be a good idea to give that knowledge to Bloodlime...

• Gothic architecture! Bloodlime doesn’t normally like or care about any kind of architecture but show him anything dark ghotic and fancy and he’ll be like ‘I LIKE THIS AND WANT IT IN MY MANSION’. Don’t worry he has the money to buy it. No idea where he gets or got said money though. Vampire savings?

• Bloodlime is mostly familiar with european vampires only, so if you know any other type of vampire he’ll listen to you attentively. Just don’t tell him about vampire moths and leeches- he knows about these... But tell him about anything else, even something like vampire squids and how they don’t actually consume blood at all and he’ll be like 8O

• Similarly to gothic architecture, he probably likes gothic art but very specific types- like realistic paintings/portaits that are so good it looks like they are staring at you, and stuff with monsters and beautiful people- things like The Nightmare by Henri Fuseli.

#asks #fruitbugs bloodlime #thanks for all the asks this rly helped 💖😢 love u #fruitbugs

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thisisthepartwhereyou · 4 years

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BEASTARS MINI-STORY #5: “Everybody Play the Game pt. 1” by JCL

---

We see Jack sitting alone by his writing desk in dorm room 701. He's got several books, documents and a notebook positioned ahead of him, suggesting that he is about to do some homework, but he is currently busy talking on his cellphone. We hear a voice coming from the other end.

???: "So you are sure that you can all come that day?"

Jack has his nose down a monthly planner-book, where we see that he has encircled a date with red ink: May 23rd. Within the circle he has also written "Game night at Yanni's with Legosi and the guys."

JACK: "Don't worry about it. I've double-checked with the others. There shouldn't be any problem."

The labrador retriever suddenly gets a puzzled look though as he adjust his reading glasses.

JACK: "But why is it so important that everyone is there? We've had game nights before with one or two missing. As long as it's four of us we can play most things." ---

We go over to the other side of the line and see that the one he is talking to is Legosi. He is standing out in the corridor of the first in the hidden condo, using the shared phone. He scratches his cheek.

LEGOSI: "Well, it's like this..." ---

We skip ahead for a bit. Jack is now sitting in the school cafeteria together with his roommates: Durham the coyote, Miguno the spotted hyena, Collot the old English sheepdog and Voss the fennec fox. They are eating their lunches, which today appears to be composed of rice, miso soup, tamagoyaki and a broccoli salad.

JACK: "He's bringing Haru to game night. He wants us all to meet her."

The rest of the guys stare at him.

MIGUNO: "His girlfriend? The bunny?"

Durham looks a little skeptical. Next to him we see Collot stuffing his face with a big helping of the tamagoyaki.

DURHAM: "Why? Does he want to rub it in our noses that he has a girlfriend and we don't? I mean we already have Collot and his harem for that."

Hearing this, Collot turns to him and protests with his mouth full, with yellow crumbs flying out and staining Durham's sleeve as he does.

COLLOT: "I don't have a harem!"

Durham groans in annoyance, picks up a napkin and wipes his arm.

DURHAM: "Then what was all that chocolate you had in your locker last Valentines day about? Looking for a golden ticket or something?"

Jack sighs at their shenanigans, like a patient parent dealing with a group of dysfunctional siblings.

JACK: "I doubt that's the reason. He probably just figured it was time he introduced her to his friends."

Durham shrugs at this and takes a sip from his milk carton.

DURHAM: "Sounds like the adult thing to do."

Miguno sticks his fork into his salad, stabbing through a piece of broccoli before taking it up to his mouth.

MIGUNO: "Just imagine it, our little Legosi, all grown up."

Durham leans forward, resting his chin in his hand while adopting a pensive expression.

DURHAM: "Grown up Legosi."

Collot crosses his arms and looks up into the air.

COLLOT: "Grown up Legosi with a girlfriend..."

Voss (who unlike his friends is so small that he has to sit on the table while eating instead of on a seat next to it) is flicking his right ear.

VOSS: "... Who is a bunny."

JACK: "..."

It is quiet for a few seconds, with it seeming like the boys from room 701 is internally tasting the situation. It is then that Durham interrupts this quiet moment with a question that appears to be on everybody's mind.

DURHAM: "Am I the only one who wonders how the hell that works?"

Collot picks up his bowl of miso with his hand.

COLLOT: "No, I've actually been pondering about that too. I mean I flirt with the herbivore girls as much as I flirt with any of the carnivore girls, but that's mostly to be courteous."

He then proceeds to loudly slurp up its content (table manners is not his strong side). He then puts the bowl down again, licking the soup residue off his lips with his tongue.

COLLOT: "I don't think I could date one though... No matter how taboo-liciously hot they can be...!"

Miguno gives Collot a skeptical look and shakes his head at him (though whether it is because he agrees with this sentiment or just finds the word 'taboo-licious' disturbing is unclear).

MIGUNO: "I couldn't believe it the first time I heard it."

JACK: "Well they've been together for almost two years, so there has to be something..." (Though I honestly don't get it either)

DURHAM: "What I don't get is the attraction, on both sides."

Durham stretches his arms out in an expanding motion.

DURHAM: "I mean Legosi is HUGE, even by wolf standards."

He pulls his arms back, then holds his right hand raised about 20 centimeters over the table.

DURHAM: "And bunnies in general are tiny! Don't you think it's a little bizarre for someone that big to be together with someone so minuscule?"

It is then that Durham remembers the presence of Voss, the undoubtedly smallest member among them, who is shooting him a glare from across the table.

DURHAM: "No offense."

The fennec gives him the finger.

VOSS: "None taken. And just so know, I don't think the size thing is that weird. I mean she could just be into big mammals. I can relate to that!"

Collot's face shrivels into a disdainful grimace.

COLLOT: "Yeah we all know about your literal giant fetish dude...!"

Durham scratches back of his head and closes his eyes.

DURHAM: "You know, I used to have a hard time picturing Legosi with a girl to begin with. I mean he's a great guy, but I always figured that he was a little too quiet and weird to ever get one. Then we have his obsession with bugs. I mean that's not an attractive hobby."

As he thinks back to previous moments with Legosi, we see a montage of the wolf being just... Well, HIMSELF. These include times when he is just staring off into space, eating an egg sandwich or letting a spider walk over his hand. As this montage ends, Durham turns to Jack.

DURHAM: "Hey Jack. You've met this girl before, right? What is she like?"

Jack blinks, then looks over his shoulder, as if he is thinking hard about it. He then appears to have reached a conclusion and gives Durham an answer:

JACK: "She's nice."

The group stares at Jack in silence. Durham waves his hand in an urging fashion; he wants more details.

DURHAM: "And?"

Jack shrugs.

JACK: "And cute I suppose... I dunno, I just met her once, so I can't really paint a bigger picture of her. All I got from her is that seemed perfectly pleasant."

Durham looks dissatisfied with this.

DURHAM: "But what about the important stuff? Like... Like..."

He struggles to come up with what he is trying to say. It is then that Collot leans over and fills in with the question closest to his heart:

COLLOT: "How big are her breasts?"

Durham snaps his fingers at this, like it was exactly what he was trying to relay just now.

DURHAM: "Precisely!"

Jack's face twists into an incredulous expression.

JACK: "THAT is the important stuff?!"

COLLOT: "Well yeah, I mean Legosi is a big guy like me. It's a fact of life: big guys like big jugs. I mean if you make out, would you be satisfied with pinching and pulling a pair of steamed buns or do you want your hands full of anpan?"

Jack stares at Collot with disapproval and a deep blush on his cheeks.

JACK: "Where did you learn that? Sex harassment ed? This is Legosi's girlfriend we're talking about, how about you showing a bit of class?"

This makes the rest of the guys look a little self-conscious, recognizing that they talked in a rather insensitive way about someone they haven't even met yet.

DURHAM: "Yeah, you're right."

MIGUNO: "Important thing is that she makes Legosi happy."

Collot nods.

COLLOT: "M-hm."

Things get quiet for a few seconds again, with them just eating.

VOSS: "You know, I do think the size play's a keyrole, but I don't think it's a tiddie-thing."

Voss puts the thumb and indexfinger of his left hand together to form a circle.

VOSS: "I mean just picture it..."

He forms his other hand into a fist which he then proceeds to push through the WAY too smal circle of his other hand. This prompts Jack to scream out loud in protest, earning the group weird looks from all over the cafeteria.

JACK: "CLASS VOSS! CLASS!" ---

TEXT BOX: 1 week and 2 days later.

Skipping ahead of time, we see Jack, Collot, Voss (who is riding on Collot's shoulder), Durham and Miguno walking through town during sometime in the afternoon.

COLLOT: "So what are you guys up for tonight? I'd personally be into a game of Catch'em Scratch'em*."

VOSS: "Well, you all know what my favorite game is."

COLLOT: "Don't tell me you want to play Fivelimbs* again? I hate to say it, but you know how it goes every time."

Voss shoots him an annoyed look.

VOSS: "Don't trample on my dream you big galoot. Besides, I have a new, mind-blowing strategy!"

DURHAM: "Does it involve using your ears? Cause they you may have a fighting chance against the rest of us."

Voss flips Durham off again.

VOSS: "Eh, fuck you!"

Miguno, who seems to be pondering on something, speaks up.

MIGUNO: "I just had a thought."

DURHAM: "Please tell me you don't want to play Word Wriggle* again. I mean half the words you come up with isn't part of any earthly language!"

Miguno waves this away with his hand.

MIGUNO: "No, no... I was thinking, what if we're too scary when we're together?"

The others give Miguno a confounded stare.

COLLOT: "Us? Scary? Are you serious?"

VOSS: "Have you ever met us? We're like the cuddliest-wuddliest bastards you'll ever come across."

MIGUNO: "I am serious. I mean, when a predation incident occurs, people avoid us like the plague. But, don't you think that's partly because we're all together?"

In Miguno's background we see the entire group (including Legosi) at an earlier point at Cherryton, walking through a school corridor together. As they walk through the halls together, several herbivores get out of the way, looking uncomfortable and/or scared.

MIGUNO: "I mean, a single carnivore can to a scared herbivore be enough. But there's five of us, six with Legosi. One by one it's not that bad, but with all of us together... Could it be that we're extra intimidating that way?"

The group continues to stare at Miguno. Durham looks disturbed.

DURHAM: "What did you bring that up for?"

MIGUNO: "Well I was thinking... What if this girl is going to get scared of us?"

Collot shakes his head at this.

COLLOT: "No way. If Legosi doesn't scare her, how could we?"

MIGUNO: "Legosi is just ONE carnivore, but what if being a small room with SIX might be too much for her?"

The group seems to think about this. Durham crosses his arms and adopts a pouty expression.

DURHAM: "That is just crazy...!"

JACK: "Well... Maybe not that crazy."

Everyone turns to look at Jack, who looks a bit worried.

JACK: "It has been proven in studies that herbivores who feel surrounded by a larger than average group of carnivores can experience heightened levels of stress and feelings of isolation. With more sensitive animals, it has even lead to panic attacks."

The group seems to take this bleak information in. Voss sigh and look depressed.

VOSS: "Well I guess we can forget about Fivelimbs then."

Durham throws his arms out in annoyance.

DURHAM: "Well that's just great, now we have to worry about scaring this poor girl to death!"

Miguno scratches his head, looking about as worried as Jack about this whole thing.

MIGUNO: "If we do that, we could just jeopardize our friendship with Legosi...!"

COLLOT: "Easy now, lets not panic. We just have to make sure we don't do anything that could make her feel threathened or anything."

DURHAM: "Like what? File down our teeth and shrink to Voss size?"

MIGUNO: "Jack, you know a lot about scientific stuff about herbivore/carnivore interactions. How can we make her feel safe around us?"

Jack scratches his chin and seems to work the old brain box to remember some useful information on this subject.

JACK: "Well... This is just what I've read in books, but..."

He holds up a finger, like he is about to hold a lecture. We see a few illustrations appearing in Jack's background: One is a basic drawing of dog-like carnivore, standing next to a basic drawing of a small, rabbit-like herbivore.

JACK: "One thing with smaller herbivores is that they are usually very self-conscious about their size. The biggest reminder of this is whenever they have to look up in order to meet a large animal's eyes."

The rabbit look up at the dog with a nervous look, a red, dotted line being drawn between it's eyes and the dog's.

JACK: "Kneeling or crouching down to eye level when greeting them can therefor make them feel more at ease."

The dog crouches down, so that his eyes are on the same level as the rabbit's. Another, green dotted line is drawn between them.

VOSS: "Well that sounds simple enough."

A new illustration appears behind Jack: The dog-like carnivore and the rabbit-like herbivore are now sitting opposite one another at a table.

JACK: "Another thing is that herbivores can experience reactionary spastic movements in their legs whenever they see carnivores eat."

As the dog eats some spagetti, we see the rabbit's legs twitch with non-voluntary movements under the table.

JACK: "It's an old reflex. The sight of sharp teeth at work triggers an inherited, physical memory that is prompting the herbivore to run."

Collot scratches the back of his head at this.

COLLOT: "I guess we could cover our mouths while eating... Anything else?"

JACK: "Well then there is the question of space."

Yet another illustration appears behind Jack: We see the rabbit surrounded by several, carnivore-like shadows. Panicky sweats are radiating from it's head.

JACK: "Herbivore's can experience an exaggerated sense of enclosure if the room is small and feels crowded with carnivores."

Miguno looks relatively calm about that fact.

MIGUNO: "Well it's a good thing we decided to rent a table at Yanni's then. That's place is both public and spacious." ---

We now find ourselves in an alley near the town center. There is an establishment in the building in front of us with a large sign above it that spells 'Yanni's Games & Coffee' with a logo that features a cup of coffee with a pair of dice in it, as if they were sugar cubes. It has a large store window with a display featuring lined up board games, including Know-Edge-Ledge*, Cages & Keepers* and Hungry-Hungry Wolf*, some big novelty chess pieces and two Catch'em Scratch'em cardboard cutouts on opposing sides of the display. A black fold-up sign is standing outside on the sidewalk with a text on it written with colored chalk, listing specials (cucumber sandwich, cinnamon buns and Latte Macchiato) and recommended games of today (Whack-the-Weevil* and Whodunnit*).

TEXT BOX: Yanni's Games & Coffee: An establishment located near the town center. It's a cafe where you can rent a table for a few hours and play various parlor games. It's a gathering place for various clubs and a popular spot for both herbivores and carnivores to sit and relax while also playing games together.

The boys from 701 are standing outside of it, looking at it with mild awe.

MIGUNO: "Seems like they've boosted the place up since the last time we were here."

Voss, Collot and Durham stare into the window excitedly, while Jack inspects the sign.

JACK: "Must've gotten more popular with time... I guess more and more people need calmer means of relaxing these days."

LEGOSI: "Hey!"

The boys turn, and they see that Legosi, accompanied by Haru, has arrived. Jack smile as he sees them.

JACK: "Ah, Legosi! Haru!"

The wolf and the bunny walk up to them.

LEGOSI: "We didn't make you guys wait for too long?"

Jack waves this away with his hand.

JACK: "No, no, we just got here."

The rest of the guys walk up behind Jack, each of them giving Haru curious looks. Haru steps forward and gives them a curt little bow.

HARU: "Hi, I am Haru. Legosi's girlfriend. It's nice to meet you."

The boys stare at her with starstruck expressions.

COLLOT, VOSS, DURHAM & MIGUNO: (This girl is...)

Haru flashes a friendly smile that seems to generate sparkles in the air around her. The boys all wag their tales.

COLLOT, VOSS, DURHAM & MIGUNO: (...SO FRICKING CUTE!)

--- TO BE CONTINUED

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spazzbunn · 4 years

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Smole Kiss On A Hill

(Artwork by @msitubeatz ALSO Katrice Russets belongs to her also)

There was one thing Katrice liked about Michael the most. He knew how to find a good and seemingly romantic spot. The two mammals were on a green grassy hill with half of the sun over the horizon where they saw more green and nature. Spring was perfect for this type of scenery. Of course with Spring, Michael had to let out a few grunts and groans. He hated Spring and Summer. The bugs were out and they bothered him, the humidity would make his fur puff up, and the heat was unbearable to him. Still, he sacrificed himself to make sure his girlfriend had the best day of her life. On top of said hill, there was a picnic blanket with a basket and some food and drinks for them to watch and enjoy the area. No loud cars. No busy streets. It was perfect for the two. After what seemed to be hours of looking through videos and sharing laughs they rested by the side of said hill to look at the alluring look of nature. “This is perfect Michael.” Katrice said as she sat next to him. She was wearing her blue dress and white belt. Although in the dimming sunlight it looked to be of teal. It confused Michael, making him think his eyes were turning colorblind. “Glad you like it Katrice.” The bunny said with a smile beaming on his face. His clothes didn’t fool her eyes. He wore his dark red buttoned up short sleeved polo shirt and dark blue jeans. Their bodies were very close to each other. Katrice felt the light snuggles of Michael on her arm and shoulder. He really does act so loving whenever he knew his plans were going perfect. He could just scream-cry if he wanted to out of pure joy. She felt warm, felt fluffy, even had the sweet smell of strawberry smoothie on her which all made Michael feel more affectionate. Katrice didn’t mind it one bit. “Sorry the food was taken over by ants…”The rabbit sounded frustrated but yet still sounded gleeful in his voice thanks to his red panda. Katrice giggled as she looked slightly down at him. She knew it wasn’t his fault, but it was funny to see a whole bunch of ants carrying food like it was some cartoon. “Oh it’s no big deal. Besides you packed enough for a whole family.” “Well I wanted to make sure you got something to eat.” The red panda couldn’t help but feel herself but beam over how innocent and kind he was to her. Honestly, she was lucky to have him. “Thank you Michael. You are so sweet to me.” With those words, Michael couldn’t help but feel his smile growing. His foot and tail started to show signs he was elevated by her sounding so loving on him. He could binky if he wanted to, but he still had to keep his cool. There they sat. On the hill watching the sun starting to go down by their side. Night was grasping to edge in for a peek at the world. Katrice started to pull her phone out of Michaels pocket, which he kept since she brought it along in case someone called her. There she started to take pictures of the sun starting to say its heartfelt goodbye to the world as it was time for peace to be brought in with night. She couldn’t help but look at them. The skies and the grass fields, everything felt so calming. She had to send it to her family soon as she got home. “Hey umm..Katrice?” The rabbit speaks out with the red panda looking at him. “I just want you to know-” Katrice butted in with a grin on her face. “Yes Michael, I do love you too.” There he blushed, but yet his mouth and words kept going. “Actually I wasn’t going to say that. I was really going to say that...you are perfect to me.” Now it was Katrice’s turn to have her cheeks flushed a pink hue. “Aww. Michael.” “I mean it.” He started to shuffle upwards to have himself be on his knees so he could face her as she moved herself, sitting down to be in front of him. “Katrice, you are good to me. I never really said this to you but...you being you is something I am far grateful for.” Katrice felt her paws getting a tender grab by his as he felt bold now. He usually was like this whenever he wanted to feel love from his favorite red panda. Yet, this seemed different. This felt more of truth talk than just a lovey dovey moment. “I had always been with bad exes. They were all like me. I-I mean you don’t game, you love roller coasters, and you like different shows than I do. Even more things you like that I don’t. You aren’t like me.” “You...fell in love with me because I was different?” “I thought you were like my ex’s. Cold. Heartless. Cruel. Yet, when I learned about you more I started to feel myself become happy. My heart felt...love…” Katrice just seemed stunned at that point. Over time they became friends and got to know eachother better, but her being different and her having different tastes of likes got him to fall for her? She never heard that before. “It wasn’t just your personality I fell for. You being different meant that, maybe, you wouldn’t be like me. I thought that we could explore each other's interests. You know, strengthen our relationship.” Katrice’s eyes widened slightly. “So that’s why you were wanting to watch my shows? Even getting on those roller coasters? Because...you wanted to try my things as I do try your things? Because you really loved me?” “No mammal would want to try their partners interests and likes...but I do, because I love you for being yourself. You ain’t like me...and I love you as you are. The wholesome red panda who loves roller coasters and those weird cartoons.” His paws letted go as he placed one on her arm and with his other placed gently on her very warm cheek. Her face still burning from feeling blushed after hearing everything he just told her. Even he couldn’t help but blush as well. She placed her paw on his chest to feel his heart thumping as her other paw was on the soft grass to keep herself balanced as she could tell where this was heading to. Their eyes half closed as their faces came forward with ease. Katrice tilted her head slightly with Michael following her lead on the opposite side. “I am glad to have you in my life Katrice.” The red panda smirked. “I am glad you are in mine too Michael.” The two locked their lips with a heartful passion as they closed their eyes. Their heads swimming around in thoughts over how they couldn’t believe to be this happy in their arms. They scooted closer not only to deepen their kiss, but to feel comfortable being by their mates' side. Their minds over and over repeating today’s events and hearing their laughter and compliments. Michael could cry at this point. He never thought he would be doing this. Going outside in scorching heat, making lunches since he was terrible as a cook, and even making plans to make sure things were perfect. He hated all of those. Yet he gave it a shot. A try. To please Katrice so he could show how much she changed his whole world. His whole life. Katrice seemed to be happy as well. He was different from her. Not just being a rabbit but a gamer? A horror movie fan? He was clearly not the same as her. Yet...like with how Michael fell hard for Katrice, she did as well. For she herself did a few of Michaels likes as well. Baby steps, but still was doing what he enjoyed so she too could have their love grow big. After what seemed to be hours of love filled smooches when it was mere minutes, they started to pull off to have their breath of air. Their soft and warm foreheads pressing against one another. Feeling their soft panting breaths on their faces. Thank goodness for Michael having breath mints by his side for the two of them to take. Normally with the sun starting to disappear they would start packing and going off their merry ways. Yet they refused to leave their spots. Their eyes fixated on their own. They didn’t want to leave the most breathtaking and absolute stunning view of their lives. In union, they spoke up of what they always hear, but always enjoy those three little words coming out of their heart and voice. “I love you.”

#zootopia #zoosona ship #McTrice #Michael Warren #Katrice Russets #Michael X Katrice #Katrice X Michael

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selfcallednowhere · 4 years

Text

March 4, 2018, San Francisco, CA

I was really excited about this show, the second at the Fillmore in as many nights, because I knew they'd be changing the setlist up a fair amount, as they always do when they play more than one show in a row in the same place. I was even more excited when a bit before the show Flans posted on Facebook that there would be fifteen new songs, which was practically a full half of the show!

They opened with "Pencil Rain"--that one was definitely a surprise. I think the only time I've seen that song outside of the two Lincoln shows I've been to was at one of the Brooklyn New Year's Eve shows a few months before this. I don't think it's one of the absolute best songs on Lincoln, there are definitely other songs I'd rather see, but any song from that album is gonna be some degree of amazing, so it was definitely cool to see it.

Afterwards, Flans said that they know it's disappointing when bands play too many new songs (WRONG--or at least, wrong when the new songs in question are as fantastic as the ones on I Like Fun!), so when they said they were going to play a new song we should pretend it was our favorite song, and they will accept fake emotion.

They played "All Time What," then John said they should introduce the next song by talking about "what makes this song so this song-y."

The song was "Why Does the Sun Shine?", once again with JF singing and JL talking. The heat and light of the sun were caused by the nuclear reaction between "things made out of stuff, microscopic dust, the feelings that separate us, and death." (The last couple made it a very Linnellian list.) There was also some adorable spazziness from him.

After that Flans said half the show would be different than the night before and the other half would be "mind-numbingly the same." He said we'd see that the banter we thought was improvised wasn't (he was joking, but I did see them recycle some banter on this tour, to my slight disillusionment). Then John said that they wouldn't be playing the songs we came back for, and Flans said they were all about "delivering disappointment" and were like General Tso's chicken.

Then Flans said he'd just gotten Netflix and so has been watching a lot of Netflix, including a documentary he'd just watched about the czars. He said that also today "I went to a restaurant where everything was fried, because who wants to live forever?" and that he was "just living my vampire life." Then he said, "We have a day off in Eugene, because who would want a day off in San Francisco? And you wonder why we're bitter." Then he asked John, "How are your problems?" "My problems are awesome."

Next they played "Mammal," which was quite exciting, and then came the next episode in the continuing saga of "Will John Linnell ever manage to successfully sing 'Mrs. Bluebeard' without screwing up the lyrics somehow?" This time he managed to get very close to the end smoothly, and I was trying to somehow send him some sort of mental encouragement ("Almost there! I believe in you!"), but then he messed up the very end, siiiiigh. At this point I pretty much gave up and resigned myself to the fact that he was never going to manage to get it right.

Next they played "She's Actual Size." I've seen this song a ton, but outside of a couple of Apollo 18 shows in the past few years it's almost all been contained within the confines of the very very first shows I went to on the Mink Car tour, back when it featured the epic Dial-A-Drum-Solo bit with Dan Hickey, which made this another surprise. It is a good song both on the album and live, but I've never been a fan of part of the arrangement they've used all the times I've seen it, where towards the end it gets way slowed down and Flans is singing in falsetto and all that (I'm fine with his falsetto at other times, it just bugs me in this one specific instance). But up until that point seeing it was fun.

Next was "The Statue Got Me High," to my great disappointment on keyboard again, but this time I managed to push myself past that disappointment and still really dig the performance, which was good because it's very close to the top in my list of all-time most-beloved songs and I do want to actually be able to enjoy it.

After that John got his accordion on ("Oh now you do," I couldn't help thinking). He introduced the next song as being "one of our tired old songs." When they started playing I saw that was an assessment I most definitely would not agree with, as the song was another one of my all-time favs (it was in fact my favorite song way back when I started getting more deeply into TMBG when I was in high school): "Turn Around"! So I was thrilled about that, of course!

Next they played "When the Lights Come On," which remains my favorite of the new songs they've actually been doing live to see. Afterwards, Flans said that it was from their new album I Like Fun, "available on Bar/None records and tapes." Then he said they really do have it available on vinyl, and that the vinyl was made in the Czech Republic, which is where they make the good stuff. John said if you want "the flat ones that actually play" you have to go there. Then Flans said that records look like calendars, and then was joking about someone in the audience who made a noise like they thought that was "a cruel burn."

Next they played "The Mesopotamians." I'd actually managed to enjoy it the night before after feeling burned out on it for some time, but this time I felt sick of it again.

Afterwards, Flans pointed out that the Oscars were currently happening (I actually didn't know that until he said it--I don't pay much attention to that sort of thing), and that we were all "out of the loop about something that's going to be appalling everyone." Then he was talking about when they announced the wrong winner for Best Picture last year--"What a shitshow. That was the ultimate 'you had one job.'"

They played "This Microphone," and then another surprise that I was really excited to see: "Cyclops Rock"! That's one of my favs on Mink Car and it's totally kickass live (I am an eternal sucker for really high-energy rockin' Flansongs live), and it had popped up a couple of times at other shows I'd been to recently, but not much, so yeh it was a lot of fun.

Next they talked about how Dial-A-Song is back. Flans said some of the songs have had "startling" videos that have gotten Youtube comments just saying something like "Fuck." John said, "That's the response we've been hoping for for 35 years." Then he said his favorite comment they've received is "What sorcery is this?" He asked Flans if he objected to the "Fuck" cos it needed a parental advisory (this amused me cos Flans swears like crazy), and Flans said not at all.

Then they returned to the previous night's discussion of this Tony Robbins guy. Flans said, "He's not an evangelist cos he doesn't have a soul," and told us again that he'd just watched a "fake documentary" about him. John said their conversation wasn't accurately conveying how "completely crazy" he is. Flans said that he "uses disruptive language to break down barriers of communication," which basically means saying "fuck" to "someone who looks related to my great-aunt." John said that was disruptive, and Flans agreed that it was "like being slapped in the face is disruptive." Then John said that if they tried they could be "the Tony Robbins of rock bands."

They closed out the first set the same way they did the night before: "Hey, Mr. DJ, I Thought You Said We Had a Deal" straight into "Birdhouse in Your Soul," which is seriously SO MUCH ROCKIN' OUT AT ONCE, it's almost too much.

The second set started with the Quiet Storm contra-alto clarinet version of "Older" like usual. Then Flans made Marty play part of some Phil Collins song again (or maybe it was a Genesis song and not him solo, I don't even know, I hate Phil Collins and did not recognize it).

They played "I Like Fun," and then Curt got out his euphonium. Flans said the euphonium is what they give you in band when you're too small to play the tuba, and John said euphonium isn't the real name of the instrument, it's a euphemism (a joke that made the word nerd in me happy).

So next they played "Shoehorn with Teeth," which is always a ton of fun live, and I really loved it on accordion (what, as opposed to all the songs I don't love on accordion?). Marty was playing some big bell, and Flans was trying to figure out what it was. Then, he said it wasn't what he thought it was, and he was just confused cos he was getting high from the pot people were smoking. John said it was particularly stinky pot (I'm reasonably bothered by the smell of pot just as a general rule, but I can confirm that whatever people were smoking here seemed to smell even worse than usual), and Flans said it's what they say is "the good stuff" on cop shows. Then John said something about a character played by Tony Roberts in Serpico, who's supposed to be the cool cop but isn't really. Then they were saying that their cultural references are going to be very specific now--they're only going to talk about him, Tony Robbins, Tom Robbins, and Tom Robinson.

Next they played "A Self Called Nowhere," and I know I'm writing some variation of "it was so incredibly special for me" in every single one of these reviews, but that's because it's always true. I know the first time is always going to be the most special time, just because it was the first and I'd been wanting this so intensely for such a long time, but something really great about the times I've seen it since the first couple is they've included Curt on trumpet (since he wasn't with them for the early part of the tour), and I always think he adds so much to the songs he appears on.

Next they played "How Can I Sing Like a Girl?" I saw that one on accordion a ton when they were doing it duo a lot on I think it was the Join Us tour, and it was great that way--I preferred it duo just cos my heart is now and forever all about duo stuff, but this arrangement was fantastic too.

Next they played "Istanbul," the duo version with them being really silly. During the part where Flans is saying "Take me back, please take me back," in falsetto and John's saying "Nooooo" in a really deep voice, John said "Even Tony Robbins says no" one of the times. Like the other times I've seen them do it duo on this tour, the full band came back for the crazy jam session at the end.

They played "Particle Man," then did another awesome big surprise song: "Dig My Grave"--GOD is that song fun live. (It's only just now occurring to me how many of the songs that I was happily surprised by during this run of shows are from Apollo 18, and having the thought that they would've needed to rehearse them for the Apollo 18 show they'd done the previous month, so that's probably why they were sprinklig them into the set here and there.) There were strobes during it, and afterwards Flans said they should've mentioned that there were strobes, but they'd forgotten, and John said that after there were strobes they couldn't remember anything (they'd had roughly the same exchange at the aforementioned Apollo 18 show). Flans said it was like how the kick drum gives you a heart attack, and then recessitates you, and John said Marty always has to play the kick drum an even number of times or they'll die. Flans said "Clear!" (all dramatically like they do on medical TV shows), and then said he doesn't even understand why they say that, and John said "I think that's a Scientology thing." Then Flans said maybe it's just a blessing.

They played "Wicked Little Critta" (as usual the best part about the song for me was watching the closeups of John's hands on his Kaoss Pad and keyboard that were being projected on the screen on the back of the stage--that's about the only time I actually like the screen being there, normally I just find it unpleasantly distracting), and then another big surprise song: the title track from that album. That stirred up a lot of Feelings for me, as it was the very first song they played at my very first show.

They played "I Left My Body," then Flans said that they'd someday figure out a way to do a three-night stand. He said they'd probably have to become a jam band. John said people didn't seem very enthusiastic, and Flans said they'd be drawing an entirely different crowd. John asked if people were yelling "Gross," but then he figured out that they were yelling about the Black Crowes, and Flans explained (like the day before) that there was a poster in their dressing room from a time they played five nights in a row here at the Fillmore and that the poster was "mocking" them.

Someone was yelling out for "Spider" and Flans said that they'd play it even though they're from New York, where the rule is you're not allowed to play requests. He said he'd gone to a sandwich shop where a woman asked the guy to heat up her sandwich and he said "We believe you'd prefer it cold." They actually did play it, but John looked so unenthusiastic when Flans said they were going to. But I mean he didn't really have much choice, he would've looked like a jerk if he'd refused to after Flans already said they were going to. Anyway it was an interesting version of the song, particularly since he played it on accordion (he just happened to already have it on for the following song).

The next song in question was "Subliminal," my reaction to which can be summed up by the "Oh fuck yes" that popped into my head as soon as they started playing it. As my friend Ant put it "That song is better live than it has any right to be," and it's another classic I've only seen a handful of times. I was disappointed by the lack of fake backwards singing at the end, but otherwise it was perfect.

Next they played "Let Me Tell You About My Operation" (my current fav Flansong and absolutely amazing live, so always a welcome addition to the set!). Then there were band intros and the main set wrapping up with "Doctor Worm."

The first encore started with "Spy." During the improv part (which is really what makes that song live), John was playing a sample I heard him employ at several other shows, but I'm not sure what the source is, it's just a woman singing "Now the night has gone."

Next they played "Fingertips," which I've always really loved live but I'm sorry to say I've been getting into burnout with it just recently due to overexposure. However, this particular performance did feature a notable variation: During "I Walk Along Darkened Corridors," Dan appeared up in the balcony and finished the song there! (He actually might've shown up there earlier than that, I'm not sure, but that was when I noticed him.)

The second encore started with "Ana Ng," so between that and "Everything Right is Wrong Again" the previous night I got both my tattoo songs in San Francisco. And they closed the show with "New York City."

So all in all this was a most excellent show. After my prior frustration on this trip with having no variation in the setlist between the first show and the second, it was really exciting to get so many different and exciting surprises between these two Fillmore shows.

The final and really not very exciting JL wardrobe report: the long-sleeved black shirt made another appearance.

#tmbg #show reviews

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sierrabinondo · 5 years

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woodland creatures tour - day 7 (greensboro)

normally i feel very weird about sleeping over people’s houses, just in general??? you know what i mean? sometimes you just can’t get comfortable because you’re not in your own bed, not because of where you are or who you’re with. on tour i’m so fucking exhausted and so comfortable with living like i’m a backpacker that it’s all just normal to me. like a brat i located the couch and crawled up onto it while everyone else took an air mattress. i would have slept on an air mattress but we couldn’t fit one lmao.

i automatically woke up at like 8:30 and couldn’t fall back asleep, so i got up and started getting ready. tour has also made me skilled at being able to freshen up and do my makeup in the crevice of any house, hotel, car, you name it. i try not to make noise but inevitably everyone heard me and slowly woke up one by one. the door was unlocked so i started to pack whatever i could into the van. god, it was so beautiful out. though we were in the south, and the temperature was still pretty high day-to-day, at this moment it just felt like the most beautiful fall weather. we managed to get out of the house at 9:30 am, which we were aiming for. james’ roommate, who was leaving for work, kindly wished us well as we packed up the van to head out. we unfortunately missed james so i shot him a text.

the day before, taylor and i coordinated a group outing to the greensboro science center, which was a museum, zoo and aquarium all in one. for the price of $12 per person, since we were a group!!! incredible! before heading to greensboro, which would be our shortest drive all of tour (an hour and a half!), we hit starbucks and panera again. when we pulled up to the panera it was in a shopping plaza with people lined up waiting for like... verizon to open???? so bizarre.

i desperately needed to hunker down and get some work done before we hit the road, for the most part my phone was providing reliable wifi but i had a time sensitive task that needed to be completed. once that was done we hit the road. we arrived to the science center and once pulses. showed up, we headed in. the science center was so sick. we started our trek around the building at like 1, and penguin feeding was at 3:30. but with so much exploring to do, we knew we’d be able to kill two hours and a half easily.

we started with the zoo portion a

nd saw a lot of cool animals. they had a lot of atypical mammals you don’t always see at zoos. what they DID have was R E D P A N D A S, and theY WERE AWAKE. back at home we have the cape may zoo which is soooooo sick, i love going there, but their red pandas are always sleeping. i literally cried because the red pandas at this exhibit were so much closer, and they were romping around their lil home. the one red panda hopped off its perch and CAME TO THE WINDOW TO SAY HELLO IT JUMPED UP RIGHT IN FRONT OF US. i definitely made a fool of myself getting loudly emotional but i didn’t care in the slightest. my entire life was made. we also saw an owl at the barn where the petting zoo was!!!

we were all laughing so fucking hard cracking jokes at every exhibit. it felt like an adult school field trip hahaha. i was having so much fun. it was nice to enjoy something together and not be stuck in a van in a rush to get somewhere. the outdoor area tuckered us out pretty badly from being in the heat, so it was nice to get back inside to go check out the aquarium in the air-conditioned building. the aquarium was pretty sick, there was a tank that was home to the biggest octopus i have ever seen in person. i was most interested in the otters and penguins, to be honest. we also hit the touch tank which was sick, except i had to soak my entire fucking arm just to maybe get a crumb of attention from a sting ray. they were swimming everywhere but where i planted myself.

after going through the aquarium, we still had some time to kill before the penguin feeding at 3:30 pm. we hit the gift shop, where they had red panda and barn owl plushes. what a coincidence, both our tour mascots!! i’m a sucker for stuffed animals so of course i bought one. taylor bought an owl for pulses. so now we both had FRIENDS to represent our bands. we went downstairs to go check out the snakes and lizards. not as exciting for me, but still sick. we were going to hit the museum part finally, but it was 3:20 so we figured might as well head over to the penguins. it was worth the wait. there was a penguin named gojira haha

it turned out that there was enough time for us to get food together before the show. jaime found a restaurant named pastabilities, it was a sit-down but you could make your own pasta dish chipotle-style???? so i got chickpea pasta with chicken, sundried tomatoes, spinach and mushrooms. sooooooooooooooooooo good. i wasn’t going to get pasta because i was going to try to be a healthy guy but ugh what the fuck ever. i love pasta. i’m not going to rob myself of pasta opportunities!!!! we had another really wonderful meal together as a tour package. i guess because we were the biggest group and you could hear us talking loudly about tour the staff figured out we were musicians. the manager came over and started asking who played what haha.

after a delicious early dinner, we drove to our hotel for check-in so that we could drop our personal bags. pulses. followed us because they were just driving home after the show later, and waited in the parking lot until they could head to the venue. i forget the name of the hotel we stayed at but the people in there were super suspect, and projecting those vibes FOR sure. taylor said she thinks she saw a guy walking around with a burner phone as a car was slowly driving in circles around the parking lot. i’m like great, last thing we need is another scary motel. our stuff ended up being fine though, it was one of the better spots we stayed at.

pulses. awaited us at the venue and we arrived a little after load-in started. it was super quiet when we showed up, we set up quickly and waited around. the house we played, ice house, was huge. so much more massive than houses in new brunswick where students in jersey host shows, mostly. there was so much room to move around and sit, it was nice. at first it seemed like not many people were inside, but then you go outside and there’s DOZENS of kids hanging out drinking. eventually more and more people came inside to watch the bands too. glow and terms x conditions were great!

for all of us, it had been a weird afternoon, but we did our best to be positive and just rip our set(s) as best as we could. and the change in attitude paid off! both our bands received awesome crowd response from the people who attended. it was awesome to see people jamming out and genuinely having a good time. also uh a fight broke out during our set??? insane. there was a kid trying to take down everyone, like just to the ground lmao, and when he tried to do it to david he put in a chokehold. and david grabbed his arm and was just like, STOP. i made everyone stop playing until we sorted out that everything was all right. i had to play without my in-ears which sucked, in the past i have always struggled and tired myself out trying to sing loud enough over the monitors. so i just tried to listen carefully, sing carefully and trust myself. and joe said i hit some like bananas note during synapse that i haven’t been able to do since?? i remember going for it and it was fine, idk maybe it was actually BAD, but i will never know now haha.

we didn’t sell merch, nor make a lot of money, but i think what counts as a successful show is when people receive you super well. leaving a positive first impression on somebody as a band is so important to me because that person could potentially go on to listen to us for a long time. i will say though, it’s important to try to help touring bands make money if you can, like legit anything. i know we’re small guys and we’re not worth much, but we travel so far from home. and this is the ONE time of year that we actually do need money to operate. i’ve run into people who don’t believe in this, or don’t understand. i guess it won’t be possible to make those people understand until it happens to them. it’s why we can only tour on vacation time and even then we deplete our funds.

we sweat our fucking asses off playing the house because it had no AC, so nothing could feel more refreshing than loading out during a rainstorm. i wasn’t even mad that it was raining. it felt so amazing. normally i bug out during crazy storms, but the thunderstorm was lighting up the sky in an incredible display. it continued as we said our goodbyes to pulses. before they headed back to virginia late, and we made our way to sheetz for post-gig eats. i wasn’t going to pig out but i was feeling the munchies. sheetz doesn’t really have anything wawa doesn’t have except for the tacos, so i got some hard shell tacos that were absolutely banging. also wonderful, they had my favorite flavor of bon & viv (black cherry rosemary) so i grabbed that too. eating tacos and drinking late was NOT a smart move the night before we played our last show on tour, but boy did it feel like a nice TREAT after playing a fantastic show.

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nanonaturalist · 6 years

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Using iNaturalist Tutorial 1: Making Observations (Mobile App)

Welcome to the first part in a series of tutorials on using the world-wide citizen science website/app/paradise that is iNaturalist [link]. They have their own tutorials on using the website [link], but *coughs* they haven’t been updated in a while and the interface changed a little.

I’m trying to encourage tumblr peeps to try out iNaturalist, so I created an “iNatters of tumblr” group [link] for us all to see what everybody else encounters, help each other ID things, and otherwise just have a fun time while contributing to science! Want to join us? Just create an account on iNaturalist, and either send me your username (on tumblr or on iNat!) and/or follow the group (click the button in the top right corner of the group page). I will add you to the list of identifiers, and all of your observations, past and present, will be added to the group! Check out my tagged posts about this project! [link]

Figuring out any new website or app can be confusing and frustrating, and I hope these tutorials will make it easier to start using iNaturalist. If anything I say is unclear, confusing, or doesn’t match what you see, just let me know and I will update this tutorial with a better explanation.

These tutorials are image-heavy and kinda long, so they will be under a cut. Note: I have the iPhone version of the app, so you may see a slightly different interface on another device.

Observation Tutorial Part 1: Making Observations with the Mobile App

First Thing’s First! Let’s check out your settings!

Most of these settings are self-explanatory. Automatic Upload The app defaults to automatic upload, which means it will start uploading your observations as soon as you save them. If you are doing a bioblitz, or are in an area with limited cell reception, this option can slow down the app and drain your battery. If you turn off this option, you will need to push the “upload” button to post your observations so others can see them.

Suggest Species This option is MAGICAL. It was first rolled out about a year ago, and HOLY CARP it’s pretty good! But, it does have limitations. First, it requires a good signal and can slow you down and eat up your battery. Also, it works based off a machine-learning system from observations previously uploaded and verified on iNaturalist. What this means: The identify tool can only successfully identify things that have been observed and identified by other real humans. Also, it only uses your main photo (the first one), and it can get thrown off if it was taken at a weird angle, or if there is lots of other stuff in the background (like plants, rocks, other bugs). And, very important to note: it does not take your location into consideration. There is a very heavy user-base in New Zealand, so it is fairly common for species that only occur in New Zealand to be suggested. So, use your best judgement. If you think something is a Booger Beetle, but the app suggests Snot Weevil, ignore the app. OR, you can stick to a higher classification (Beetles) and come back to it later. You can always change your mind!

iNaturalist Network You don’t really need to worry about this too much. There are a bunch of “flavors” of iNaturalist, and which network you select is the one your data will stick to in the event that the iNaturalist Network breaks up. They are more or less regional. More information about the networks here [link]

Okay, let’s take some photos!

Wow, nice! You have two options for making observations with the mobile app. Option 1: Take the photo now, worry about iNat later Option 2: Take the photo using the iNat app

I recommend choosing Option 1 if you are taking photos of things that may move, because the app has a bit of a delay, and the quality tends to not be as good. I use Option 1 almost exclusively, because it’s easier to take my photos and do bulk uploads when I’m inside and not being chased by mosquitos. Option 2 is better if your subject isn’t moving too fast, and if you are just observing a couple things (and also if you don’t want to build up a several-month-long backlog of photos on your phone...).

You can take and select multiple photos! Try to get different angles, and photograph different parts of your subject to help with IDs later.

Advanced iNatter Option If you take photos with your phone to upload later, you have the option of annotating your photos! This is helpful if you have more than one specimen in the photo, or if your specimen is well camouflaged. You can also point out important features, like I did below. Any edits you do to your photos before you upload them can really help out people who do IDs!

Regardless of which option you choose, you will end up at your observation page!

Adding identifications to your observations

From your observation page (on the left above), you can add more photos, add an ID, write notes, and edit time and location information. More on those options later! First, let’s click “What did you see?” to get to the ID page.

If you have “Suggest species” turned on, the app guesses what you saw. Clicking the information symbol to the right will show you more information on each species to help you decide if that ID is a good fit. Feel free to pick whatever you think is closest, and other people will agree with you OR suggest other identifications later.

If you know what you saw, or if you have a guess, go ahead and type it into the search bar. If you have autocomplete on, it will (guess what!) autocomplete what you are typing. If you have a slow connection, LOOK OUT because you might accidentally select the wrong ID due to lag.

Editing Location and Privacy

Depending on your phone’s privacy settings, your photos will automatically have a GPS stamp on them, so if you are adding photos to iNat later, you usually don’t need to worry about remembering where you took them. If you have this feature turned off for your phone, that’s fine! Or, if you have that option turned on, and your photos are GPS tagged, you can still protect your privacy while keeping the location data useful for scientists and researchers.

If you are wondering, “Why is location even important? Why should I bother?” There are a couple answers! First, there are very few species present worldwide. For the most part, in order to identify something, it is essentially to know where it was. Sometimes, you can be vague, and just stating the country is good enough detail to identify something (common for larger animals, like birds and mammals, and larger plants like trees). But other times, you need to be extremely specific. Some insects look nearly identical to each other, but there will be different species living on one side of a mountain range vs the other side, even if they are only 20 miles apart. And also, researchers who are tracking the movement of species in response to climate change can benefit from having access to accurate data--showing that a species of plant is appearing even several miles north each year is crucial to understanding how to manage environmental stewardship.

If you are out and about, and have GPS phototagging on, you don’t really need to edit your location (unless you want to!). If you have GPS tagging off, or the location data was a little off, OR you want to protect your privacy (observations at your house, for example), here’s what ya do:

Click the area on your observation page with location (I blanked those details out of my screencap). You will be taken to a map. Clicking the green arrow takes you to your current location. You can zoom in or out of the map (unfortunately, you can’t just type in an address on the mobile app, but you CAN on the website, and you CAN edit posts you made from the mobile app on the website later!). When the location you want is centered on the map, zoom in or out to set your accuracy (if you can’t remember where you were, but you KNOW you were somewhere in Austin, you would basically do what I have above in my map).

If you don’t want to edit the location, but you don’t want the entire world to know where your photos were taken, you can change the GeoPrivacy setting (kinda cut off in the screencap, but it’s directly underneath location). You can select three options: Open: Everybody can see where your observations were made Obscured: iNaturalist will create large square that contains your true location at some random point within the square. All observations with obscured coordinates will be randomly assigned to one point in that square. Only you can see those coordinates (one exception is if you join a very specific type of project, and you have opted-in to let project curators see obscured coordinates). Private: No location information is shared. You may select this option if you want, BUT keep in mind it will be very difficult for people to help identify your observations! For more information on GeoPrivacy, iNaturalist provides more information here [link]

Adding Observations to Projects

iNaturalist has many different kinds of projects [link]. The “iNatters of tumblr” project is a “collection” project type, which automatically adds observations meeting specific criteria (in our case, all observations made by users I have added to the project). Another type of of project, the “traditional” project type, was originally the only type of project available. It’s great for collecting some very specific observations that you can’t really search for. Two of my favorites are “Mating Behaviour” and “Animated Observations” [both are links]. The downside of these kinds of projects is somebody has to manually add each observation to the project. If you have joined one of these kinds of projects, you can link them to your observation before you save it. You can also add observations to projects any time later.

To link your observation with a project, you must have joined a project first. Afterwards, just click the button and you’re done!

Saving and Uploading

You’re almost done! Just ONE final step. Save!!! Click the big green SAVE button at the bottom, and you see your beautiful observation:

If you have Auto Uploads turned off, you need to click the upload button to start uploading. That’s it! Congratulations!

If you take your photos with a camera, or if you want to upload a BUNCH of observations at one time, you will want to make your observations on the website, rather than the mobile app. Making observations on the iNaturalist website will be the subject of Tutorial 2!

September 18, 2018

#this post took me three hours you're welcome #tumblr inat project #inaturalist #inat #citizen science #inat tutorial #how to #informational #time to go home #insects #beetles

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galacticbugman · 5 years

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My Favorite Insects

Well howdy ya’ll Galactic Bug Man here with another blog post. Sorry this is long over due I have been busy with school and I have had some family issues that needed to be resolved this last few months but I am back with another blog post and just in time for the start of *drum roll* *fanfare* INSECT SEASON! or just spring.

So In my last post that was back in November I said that I would talk about what are my favorite insects. For the record some people may tell you that you can only have one or two favorites of everything. Well for me that has always been hard for me. Anything that interests me automatically becomes an obsession with me. With the autism it is kind of hard to ignore things that have a profound interest with me. Some people just have one favorite or each category. As for my goofy/nerdy self I have many favorites on many levels. For me I don’t just have one favorite science fiction TV Show or movie, same goes for Cartoons, comedies, food...eh you get the picture. Anyway I don’t just have a single favorite family of animals or just one favorite species for each.

In my line of a hobby it is the thrill of the search and an encounter goes. For me favorites come in many forms and have different lifestyles, and sometimes the story that will form when I find an organism helps make an organism my favorite. So there are many things that add up to make an organism a favorite. For me it is all of these put together. Even though I am a storyteller of sorts and love to share experiences I have had finding certain species. So now let us go into some of my favorites from the world of insects. Even though I am a birder too think I am just going to leave this post strictly for the insects. Just FYI I am expanding my blog to more than just insects. In the future I will be talking about birds, mammals, and all things natural. So with that said let us dive in to Insect family #1...

Beetles have become a growing obsession for me in the last few years. Back when I was in the Future Farmers of America I participated in an entomology contest once in the spring of 2011 then I did another one in spring of 2012.It was like a UIL contest of sorts but it was an FFA governed contest. We had to study a list of 125 or 150 insects I can’t really remember the amount we had to ID but it was a lot. The Texas Ironclad Beetle was one of the many on the list. (the picture was a photo I took of one during the 2017 iNaturalist City Nature Challenge of that same species.) The FFA contest really opened my eyes to loving the insect world. I became quite interested in the lives of insects and the ways they work. Butterflies had always been a favorite subject of mine ever since I was in grade school. My late grandmother (who passed away back in August of last year) got me butterflies and we had a garden at the house we moved from back in April for a long time. Most insects didn’t really appeal to me until my time with the Martin High School FFA. Me and the teams I had both years won first prize at the contests so that is how my love for loving insects a lot more than I did started to grow. Beetles started to grow on me. There have been many species that I have seen in the last few years that I wouldn’t believe existed. Some are just so amazing to watch and to photograph.

A growing favorite group of mine would have to be the Tiger Beetles. They are some of the prettiest and most vibrant colored of the beetles. This one was found at Thora Hart Park a few blocks from where I live now. We moved back in April of last year. This was found on one of our getting ready to move days. This guy is called a Chartreuse Tiger Beetle. It is a really shiny one. I found this one on one of the sand paths out there in the back forty of the park. It is small but the number of Tigers is amazing. There are a lot of deep sands out there and on any given hot and sunny day they will be out. Tiger Beetles are known for being fast throughout their lives. They have good eyesight even when they are larva which is kind of interesting for an insect. They are also predatory their whole lives. With a sharp pair of scissor-like mandibles and a tiger like attitude they are a fascinating beetle to observe. Both fast runners and fast fliers they one of an insect’s worst nightmares. This one was really cool. I saw this flash of green and blue. Then it landed in front of me and then I saw a flash of red. These guys are actually yellow on their wing covers; but when the sun hits them just right they shine a bright reddish orange color. That is what makes them really appealing to me. We all like shiny things don’t we? Shiny rocks, Pokemon, silver, gold. You name it people love shiny objects. For me shiny beetles are no different.

Another one of my favorites is this one called the Carolina Tiger Beetle. This one was one cool Tiger Beetle. I was out at a park called Parr Park in Grapevine Texas. There was a bunch of these guys running about the light traps we were using during one of our field investigations which was a Moth Night. A moth night or mothing event is where you set out lights with different wave lengths and purposely attract insects to photograph and document them. I have been on several in the last couple of years and they are loads of fun. They are cool because you don’t always get to see the creatures of the nocturnal world that often if you are a day person. Me I am more of an afternoon and night person. I have never been much of a morning person.That doesn’t mean I won’t get up early some days and go early morning birding or something like that. I do that sort of thing all the time but the night time when it is really muggy and sticky outside the bugs just come from out of the wood work. I don’t suggest doing those kinds of events if you don’t like bugs touching you or if you have a fear of insects because they will get into you mouth and your hair. Anyway getting back on track. I had my flashlight on and I was just looking down to see what I could find. I saw a couple of purple streaks running around at the base of our sheets that the bugs would cling to while we took photos. These guys really catch your eye and the refection from a headlamp or a flashlight is amazing when the light bounces off these guys. It is amazing how shiny they are. That is why I love these guys because one they are appealing by vibrancy in color and by their amazing patterns and shades. They are amazing little creatures. They are tiny and you can easily miss them. That is why you will not have tour guide going to have a tour guide with a group of people looking for these guys. They are too small and will flee in an instant. Still going out by yourself will be your best bet on seeing these guys.

Another one of my favorite beetles is this kind. This one is known by only a scientific name. It is called Zygogramma Heterothecae. It is a mouth full I know. This photo was taken at Tarrant County College’s South Campus where I go to school. I found this guy on one of my study breaks. On most study breaks I either go to the school’s game room and hang out with the other nerds or I go out and see what insects I can find so I can upload them to iNaturalist. This guy was at one of the best places to look for insects on campus (the library). This guy was the first one I have seen. Just look at those markings; it almost looks like a tribal painting or something from a tropical land. It is amazing how these guys look. I posted it to the iNaturalist website and turns out it had never been found in the Metroplex before so I got to expand its range just a little bit. That is another factor that makes an insect my favorite for its rarity or if it is a new one for a new range of territory. I have expanded ranges for a lot of insects on iNaturalist in the three years I have been using it. It is not that I am a big shot or anything it is just that I like to take pictures of everything from common insects and birds to the really hard to see ones. It is often the small things that are the least observed. I don’t know just how many species in total I have expanded for but I have also found several firsts for many parks around the area. One of my friends tries to give me the big head and calls me a rockstar. The truth is I am no rockstar or super naturalist I am just doing what a citizen scientist does take photos and send them on the database website and let nature take its course. I mean it is cool that I have found a lot of species that are rare and maybe out of place but I am not one who likes to take credit; I am the kind of person that likes to give credit when it is due. I have always been modest in this case. But yes finding rare things like this adds to the value.

Sometimes a bug just has to look like a spaceship or an visitor from another world to get my vote. Many insects I encounter remind me of things from Star Trek, Star Wars, Doctor Who, Battlestar Galactica (1978 version with the Ovion Bug People) among other science fiction movies and TV shows. This guy Delphinia Picta or Picture Winged Fly is a wild looking one. It almost reminds me of the Bounty Hunter Greedo that worked for Jabba the Hutt that Han Solo blew away with his laser pistol in Star Wars IV A New Hope. It has a head that looks just like Greedo’s face minus the green with the bumpy texture and the funny looking ears. This guy is just bizarre looking all together. It looks like a starship with a Greedo head. so that is kind of fun and adds to the favorites if they remind you of fun things like that. Many insects in my mind always look like a sci-fi or horror movie monster from the 1930s- 1960s with the B horror classics. That is just it with being a nerd you see things like that out in nature and as a huge nerd of science fiction and stuff like that I have a lot of fun with it. I seriously can’t be out with a group on a BioBlitz see a bug and shoot off my mouth with some kind of silly science fiction reference. Thankfully I am with people that get it so I am safe but yes it is true that I can’t go a day without referencing a TV show, movie, or book. I am just that kind of guy even when it comes to nature. I surprised no one has gotten sick of me yet in my naturalist group. Lets look at another insect that looks like an alien shall we.

This guy is called the Wheel Bug. Named after its weird Buzz Saw like blade on his midsection. I am surprised that when they made the Starship Troopers series they didn’t make a bug that looked like this monster. This guy is a true monster. I It conjurers up a lot of science fiction nightmares just by looking at it but man I live for this kind of stuff. I love weird looking bugs. The weirder the creature the more blown my mind is. Sometimes the things with a face only a mother could love are the best things to look at. This guy you do not want to pick up just FYI. It can bite and it bites hard. I have never been bitten but good golly I know people that have been bitten and they say it is a feeling you don’t want to have. It may not kill you but it can leave one nasty mark. This guy is a member of the Assassin Bug group and it is one of the largest. Most assassins don’t get this big but these guys are over an inch long in some cases. They are a true monster but heck just as long as you keep your distance they can’t hurt you. So that is one factor for me I guess. Some animals like elephants may remind you of Dumbo or a baby deer may remind you of Bambi. However if you are into bugs and a pop culture nerd you will probably be seeing some Close Encounters business. Just saying I have been on the sci-fi bandwagon all my life and let me tell you some insects get even stranger and bring even more science fiction stuff to the table.

Some times it just has to have a fun name to say and since we just went down a path of sci-fi reference I think this one would be great to talk about. This little butterfly is known as a Phaon Crescent. I think that name sounds so much like a ship name (just the Phaon part). This guy is a very pretty butterfly that looks very much like a starburst or a disco ball. It is a very interesting butterfly and is just as small as its sister species called the Pearl Crescent which we get here in Texas too. These are not as common for me on a more personal note but they do happen quite frequently. Both are really pretty but this one gets bonus points for having such a cool name.

Sometimes to be a favorite they have to look weird before you can figure them out and know what they are doing. As in this case for this little Yellow-collared Slug Moth. You see that arched thing? that is its butt. I am just going to say this now like I have said so many times I am glad I don’t have to put my face near my butt for protection. This moth is in its defensive position. I was in a group doing another event out at Parr Park and I was coming back with a few other and I spotted him on a garbage can and we couldn’t figure out what he was or what exactly he was doing. So yes sometimes the oddest bits of behavior help with the humor of a potential favorite observation.This guy was just doing what he does best when not looking for food or a mate. 1. he had chosen a good hiding spot that matched his color. 2. he was just in the defense position so that way nothing serious would happen to him if he was attacked. 3. It just looked funny to us. We all gave it crazy bewildered looks trying to make heads or tails out of it. Turns out many moths do the same thing like the Eggplant Leaf-roller Moth and others. So sometimes the things we don’t understand may seem like a good laugh and that could add to a fond memory.

So that is it some of my favorite insect moments frozen in time. I have tons more favorites but it is kind of hard to cram them all into a single blog post when you have over 5,000 observations and over 1,370 species on your life list. That is kind of hard to pick and choose all of your favorites. I would like to hear what your favorite animals are and how you pick and choose your favorites. So until we meet again readers stay tuned for more from me Galactic Bug Man. I will see you on the trail. See you soon! gotta run.

#insects #wild #behavior #nature #wildlife #texas #beetles #coleoptera #moths #lepidoptera #butterflies #parks #hikes #photographs #macro photography #close ups #up close #closer look #insect #bugs

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thetygre · 5 years

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30 Day Monster Challenge 2 - Day #24: Favorite ‘Monster’ Animal

This was kind of meant to be my list of favorite animals that are generally considered ‘creepy’ or ‘bizarre’. They might seem incredibly tame these day, but I still remember a time when things like pet snakes were ‘weird’, and I wanted to talk about them.

1. Giant Squid

My favorite animal. A real life sea monster. I never thought that I would actually see one in my lifetime, even with all our modern technology. After the first monster challenge, we got our first clear recording of a giant squid swimming in a Japanese bay. Just that footage told us so much about them; how they swim, what they look like moving, the shape of their tentacles and mantle. Being squid instead of octopi, it’s unlikely that the Architeuthis Dux is particularly intelligent. But even still, looking into that giant eye, I couldn’t help but wonder; how much is going on in there? Does it know who we are? When it swims in the darkness of the Abyssal Zone, in a place that has never seen sunlight, will it remember us? It’s an exciting time for squid chasers, that’s for sure.

2. Aye-Aye

The Aye Aye keeps making ‘weird animal’ lists, and I honestly don’t understand why. It’s adorable! It’s a kind of nocturnal lemur that specializes in eating tree grubs. There’s a lot of superstition surrounding the Aye Aye on Madagascar; it’s considered an unlucky animal, and its elongated middle finger is supposed to give bad luck. I have a fantasy book that starts on Not-Madagascar, and the lemur-folks’ corrupt priests are all Aye Ayes; the look so cute in their robes and wooden masks. The Aye Aye is just a scruffy, scraggly little tree goblin that wants to sleep all day and eat more bugs.

3. Anglerfish

A wise man, a man who I think tumblr knows relatively well, once sang a song about an anglerfish, and that song got me through some hard times. Anglerfish are absolutely fascinating animals; aside from their individual biological adaptations that are common across the whole family, each anglerfish is incredibly unique. They are an incredible example of evolutionary diversity, especially given that they live in such an unforgiving environment. It’s hard to pick a single favorite anglerfish; bearded, hairy, football, wolftrap, glass, etc. But I think there’s something to be said for the classic black sea devil; basic shape, killer name, and everything you could want out of an angler.

4. Spotted Hyena

I feel like hyenas are coming down from the ‘creepy/weird’ animal lists. The world is collectively realizing that hyenas are actually adorable, and do a lot more work than they’re given credit for. Even still, there’s something to admire in just how strange they are compared to other mammals. While they’re efficient predators in their own right, hyenas will always be known for being scavengers. And of course, there’s the folklore surrounding them; hyenas are witches’ familiars in West African superstition, and even medieval Europeans though of them as unnatural creatures in their bestiaries. But I’m glad that we can appreciated hyenas more fully now.

5. Vampire Bat

Our representative bat is still the standard bearer for the ‘spooky’ animals. It’s hard to tell how long bats have been associated with evil and darkness in certain cultures; even before vampires became tied to them, they were thought of as ‘night creatures’, and the ancient Mayans even had the chthonic bat god Camazotz. But the contrast is just so broad when you actually look at the vampire bat. For starts, they’re tiny, like all members of the microchiroptera family; the average vampire bat can fit in the palm of your hand. They live in groups, and they actually share the blood they drink with their young. Even still, the vampire bat has enough features to keep it weird; its dietary habits are still unusual for bats, it spends an inordinate amount of time walking on the ground compared to other chiroptera, and it has to be said, it still has a face like a feral goblin.

6. Ball Python

We now enter the ‘used in movies to represent more dangerous species but actually a cinnamon roll’ portion of the list. Ball pythons are definitely a favorite when it’s time to put a snake on camera; they can grow pretty big, and they look exotic enough to be mysterious. But like hyenas, I feel like enough people know at this point that your average ball python is about as threatening as a pair of socks. It’s always hilarious to me to see a ‘cunning’ or ‘dangerous’ snake get referenced and then the crew pulls out a python. What’s it gonna’ do; sleep at the hero to death? Out in the wild you still get the odd case of a constrictor getting the drop on someone, which is barely enough to edge pythons on the ‘man’s predators’ list, but even those cases are freakishly rare. In the end, pythons are your legless, furless alternative to the cat; sleepy, hungry, and in constant need of body heat.

7. Red Knee Tarantula

Every movie’s favorite spider is the red knee tarantula. Their big, they look dangerous, and they’re striking color scheme makes them stand out. Of course, tarantulas are one of the most harmless family of spiders to humans; they’re a terror to anything smaller than your finger, but generally safe for people. Their venom isn’t enough to kill or even seriously injure a person, though their giant mandibles still give a nasty pinch. Honestly, a person is probably more at risk from the stinging hairs tarantulas release as a defense mechanism than their bite. While all tarantulas are fuzzy and loveable, I’m still fondest of the Mexican red knee just for its Halloween color scheme.

8. Emperor Scorpion

Naturally, as a Scorpio, I feel some predisposition to scorpions. I always liked them a little bit more than spiders, and still think that they’re the cooler of the two arachnids. The scorpion is one of nature’s near-perfect animals, capable of surviving in the harshest of environments. They were earth’s first terrestrial predators, the original monsters, and hunted our ancestors in the prehistoric oceans. These days, you can buy them at your mall pet store for a pretty reasonable price and feed them crickets. The emperor scorpion is still my favorite species because of how big and bulky it is. Its venom is relatively harmless because its claws have evolved to tear through the armor of its prey, though to us it’s just a nasty pinch. The whole goth-lobster package is offset by a pair of cute beady eyes looking up at you, begging you to have mercy on your species’ old nemesis and not stomp on it so it can scuttle away.

9. Black Vulture

It was a tough call in the bird department, but I feel like corvids and owls have gotten enough love now that we can start focusing on vultures. Vultures have an uphill battle, because stupid, ignorant people can’t appreciate how cool having anti-bacterial acid urine really is. Vultures are synonymous with barren places, true animals of the waste. They’re scavengers down to a ‘t’, and the go-to example for why scavengers are important to any ecosystem. While the Egyptian vulture is the most ‘vulturish’ and the bearded vulture the most MAJESTIC, my personal favorite is the good old black vulture. Black vultures have been in some weird and interesting places in my life, to the point that I’m starting to think of them as some kind of omen. An omen that says, “Oh boy, I get to see a vulture today!”

10. Xoloitzcuntli Dog

So the xolo dog takes bottom place by virtue of being a dog, and therefore a spiritually pure being inhabiting an earthly vessel to guide mankind towards goodness. These days, xolos are pretty popular, but I remember a time when Americans generally didn’t know about them by and large. When they first showed up in American media, they were labeled as ‘the world’s ugliest dog’, and I remember a few people wondering if they had mange or were pictures of chupacabras. With social media, everybody now knows that xolos are adorable, if still kind of comparatively weird looking, canine friends.

#30 Day Monster Challenge 2 #30 Day Monster Challenge #animals #oh lord i'm so far behind

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askdawnandvern · 6 years

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A Lamb Among Wolves :Ch 32

Not much to say about this chapter. Just a little intimate quite breakfast between Audrey, Dawn and Vernon. Fluffy, cutesy character moments to make you all warmed and toasty inside before i gut your collective hearts out like a mortal kombat finishing move. Lol, Sorry. I just mean were moving up to the big catalyst of the whole story soon, and so this fluffy stuff might hurt once we get there.

Still working on speeding up the chapter output, but I've been fighting off a nasty bug that I haven't been able to shake since seemingly December that's making my mind all murky. So I'm torn between trying to force it out because i really want to finish it, and having the quality suffer for it. Or go with the flow, and write when it works. Hopefully it will kind of go away, I am on meds now for the thing, because apparently the first run of meds on my sinus infection proved to weak. But hopefully this will finally do the trick.

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Chapter Thirty-Two: The Perfect Gift

Vernon let out a pleasant sigh as he slipped another slice of his Mother's famous caramel prench toast into his maw. With the slightest press of his teeth against the syrup soaked morsel, hot caramel sauce oozed out from its center, spilling out into his throat and dancing pleasantly across his tongue. The overall delectable sweetness causing the wolf to cringe in delight as he continued to chew the scrumptious treat.

There was nothing quite like his Mother's cooking, especially when it came to anything she baked. And while Vernon knew his favorite recipes well, and could do a reasonable job recreating them on his own, they always seemed to lack that special something that only his Mother seemed capable of bringing out in the dish. A certain flavor, an indescribable quality that Vernon could never quite pin down with his own attempts. Audrey usually referred to it as being the 'love' baked into every batch, and despite how cliché and silly it sounded to Vernon, with no hard evidence for the wolf to prove otherwise, he found it hard to argue against it.

Audrey had taken the time to teach all of the Hunter pups how to cook. It was part of her efforts to make sure that he and his brothers were fit to survive on their own when the time came. And while Vernon had proven to be leagues better than someone like Xavier, who seemed to be able to create kitchen fires at a mere glance, Vernon could only describe himself as nothing more than an 'adequate' cook.

At a certain point Vernon had come to accept that his cooking skill would never quite match up to his Mother's abilities. It simply wasn't something he could hone as easily as someone like Malcolm seemed to be able to. Nor did Vernon have a bizarre natural skill for it like Ulric.

How the twitchy, nervous wolf seemed able to duplicate their Mother's recipes perfectly was beyond Vernon. Perhaps it lied in the wolf's extremely analytical nature, and his impeccable attention to detail that made it easy for the wolf to cook as well as their Mother did. It was something Vernon chalked up to being yet another trade off, the gods way of making up for Ulric's complete lack of social skills by compensating for it in his other traits. Still, it made for a great question to pose to his Mother sometime. After all, Ulric certainly didn't bake a damn thing with 'love', the wolf didn't believe in it. Ulric was the kind of mammal who believed love to be nothing more than a chemical process in the brain. It wasn't that surprising, considering the wolf's line of work and way of thinking. Yet despite that belief, he could bake just as well as their Mother right down to that supposed phantom ingredient. And so it made her intangible reasoning behind Vernon's own failings make even less sense.

Still, at least it gave the wolf something to look forward to when visiting the Hunter Ranch. Unlike his Father's mood swings, or whether or not Yuri was posed to show up for a surprise visit, his Mother's cooking was something that was always an absolute good. A hot, tasty and filling meal was a guarantee, and the wolf had come to rely on it whenever he made his way home. Regardless of how difficult the day around it seemed to be, or however badly a mood you were in, Audrey's meals seemed to have the miraculous ability of making everything seem better. And for that reason, Vernon could scarcely conceive a better way to start off the morning than with one of his Mother's scrumptious breakfast delights.

Well, the wolf could think of a few thing that involved his Honey lamb, but Vernon wasn't keen on breaking the house rule again so soon. As far as he knew, he was still being punished for the previous evenings debacle. And Vernon surmised it was better simply to not bring it up in case his Mother had some how forgotten her decree. The last thing Vernon wanted was to once again find himself elbow deep in dirty dishes.

The breakfast table was pleasantly quiet, leaving Vernon to simply enjoy the first truly comfortable moment he had since arriving at the Ranch. That is to say, the first comfortable moment that involved any members of his family. The peaceful solitude of sharing a delicious meal with his Mother and his mate without the bickering and teasing of the other members of the pack allowed Vernon to fully unwind. To allow whatever nervous troubles and worries eating at him to simply slip into the recesses of his mind as he savored the moment as well as the meal.

Vernon felt oddly optimistic despite the day that lie ahead. While his Mother's plan to drag them to the fair against the wishes of his Father should have been something to leave his stomach twisted up in knots, the wolf felt a strange sense of hopefulness. Perhaps it had been Dawn's pep-talk from the previous evening. Or perhaps it had been the fact that Yuri had been more or less prevented from spending the evening mocking him thanks to his other brothers shutting him down. Followed up quickly by Wade's accidental reveal in regards to his mysterious mate becoming the dominant topic until they had all more or less tired themselves out.

But if Vernon had to pick out what had played the biggest role in renewing his confidence and optimism, it had to have been recovering the friendship bracelet Dawn had given to him as a pup. Just the sight of it, even in its broken state, was enough to leave the wolf feeling as if perhaps things were starting to turn around for the pair. Finding the ruined bracelet had been a sign, a good omen in Vernon's eyes, of things to come. And the prospect of being able to show it to the ewe later today had the wolf practically humming with delight as he took another bite of his breakfast.

His dreams the night before had been laced with visions of how he imagined the big reveal would go. Each one a different approach, a different take on how to surprise the ewe with his discovery, and how it had been restored. But regardless of the scenario it all ended more or less the same. Dawn basking the wolf in her beautiful warm smile as tears swelled in her eyes. In some of the dreams she would hug him, in others she would kiss him, in a few she managed to jump into his arms and squeeze him with all the strength her tiny little arms could muster. Despite all the terrible things that both of them had endured throughout the trip, this was something the wolf could rely on to make his little ewe happy. To try to make up in some way for the terrible shaming his Father, Yuri, Ana, and the others had put her through. After over two decades, their bracelets would be reunited. That is, so long as his Mother finished the repairs in time.

Vernon shifted his glance toward his Mother. The wolfess was looking at her plate, carefully cutting her own stack of prench toast before bringing a piece up to her muzzle. She had brought it a mere few inches from her muzzle before she seemed to notice Vernon's wide-eyed stare.

Audrey lowered her fork, raising the wolf a curious eyebrow in response.

Vernon didn't want to draw Dawn's attention, and so the wolf attempted to limit himself to simple facial gestures. The wolf raised his eyebrows, bobbing them decisively in regular intervals, but the she-wolf seemed perplexed by his expression. Audrey tilted her head slightly as she watched his attempts to convey his message. Vernon held back the urge to groan, instead adding a slight nod to his head in an effort to further emphasize what he thought was a rather clear message.

Audrey only seemed more puzzled, the she-wolf now squinting at him quizzically.

"What?" The she-wolf mouthed inaudibly.

Vernon rolled his eyes at her response. Thinking on his feet, the wolf glanced down at his paw, flicking his eyes back and forth between it and his Mother's eye line. As Audrey brought her attention down, the wolf very quickly tapped his wrist with his other paw, flashing Audrey a weak grin after she caught the gesture.

Audrey let out a quiet chuckle, giving the wolf a slight affirmative nod as she returned to her meal, scooping her previously cut morsel of food back onto her fork and into her mouth.

Vernon tried to stifle his excitement as an ecstatic grin forced its way to his muzzle. The wolf had felt like leaping out of his chair with joy, but an act that dramatic would have given away to the ewe seated next to him that something was off. However, the dull thumping emanating from his chair as his tail slapped haphazardly against it was the one impulse he couldn't control. The overwhelming silence at the breakfast table only helped to make the 'twapping' noise it produced seem that much louder.

"I take it someone had a good night's sleep?" Audrey said with a chuckle, drawing the wolf's attention back her way.

'Saved by the she-wolf" Vernon thought to himself, thankful for his Mother's distracting question. However, the wolf's excitement was still far too palpable to keep from leaking out in his response.

"Y-yeah!" Vernon yelped. The energy in his voice was obvious, despite his attempts at stifling it. His words wavering as he tried to bring his cadence back to something more 'normal'. "I mean, yeah." Vernon continued, lowering his voice as he clasped the sides of his seat with his paws to steady himself. "I slept alright."

Audrey shook her head, letting out a giggle as she turned her attention to Dawn.

"And how bout you Darlin'?" Audrey asked.

Vernon turned to Dawn to see her reaction only to catch her looking down at her plate. The ewe seemed oddly quiet. Well, more so than usual. And Vernon could easily see the slight frown on her muzzle as she picked lamely at her food.

"How long has she been sitting like that?" Vernon thought to himself as he appraised the ewe's cowed sitting pose. The wolf had been so lost in his own thoughts that he had failed to notice the state his mate was in. Even though their relationship had been a relatively short one, Vernon liked to think he could read the ewe's expressions pretty well by now. And as he observed the seemingly troubled ewe, the wolf tallied all the red flags in his head that the sheep was now displaying. Her slight frown, hunched posture, lack of appetite despite the sheer deliciousness of his Mother's cooking, and seeming inattentiveness told Vernon that she was lost in her own thoughts. And the frown lead the wolf to believe that those thoughts weren't very good ones. Vernon's own smile began to slip. His previously subdued worries now creeping back up in his mind as he watched his mate carefully. The ewe remained silent, leaving his Mother's question to hang in the air for several moments as the ewe continued to play with her food.

"Darlin'?" Audrey uttered, slightly louder this time.

At that Dawn seemed to perk up, jumping slightly in her seat.

"O-Oh!" Dawn stammered, placing her utensils down. "I-I'm sorry Audrey, what did you say?"

Audrey grimaced slightly, her eyes now appraising the ewe as carefully as Vernon imagined his own were.

"I was askin' how ya'll slept Darlin'." Audrey repeated. "You get to sleep okay?"

"Oh..." Dawn muttered, her head drifting back down to her plate as she picked up her fork. The ewe stabbed a particularly soggy looking morsel onto the tines and began to swab it around on the plate idly. "I mean...I slept okay..." The ewe shrugged. " It could have been better I guess."

The wolf managed a slight smirk. "Right, she's just tired." Vernon reassured himself in an effort to push his nervous thoughts back. The wolf leaned over, wrapping an arm around the ewe before pulling her tightly against him for a hug. It was awkward bridging the distance between the two chairs, but thankfully Vernon was tall enough for both of them.

Dawn seemed surprised for a second, but quickly leaned into the hug, wrapping her hooves around the wolf as he buried his muzzle in her woolly poof.

"I'm sorry Darlin'." Vernon cooed. "I know you ain't a crack of Dawn type of mammal."

Dawn giggled softly into his chest.

"Neither are you!" Dawn retorted, giving the wolf a playful swat on the back as she continued to hug him.

"Yeah bu-" Vernon paused as his nose caught whiff of a peculiar scent mixed into the ewe's wool. The wolf took another soft sniff, burying his nose deeper in an attempt at better discerning the source of the odor. "Don't tell me her hormones are still actin' up?" The wolf thought to himself.

As the wolf took a sharper inhale, Dawn pulled herself away slightly, staring back at the wolf with a curious expression.

"What are you sniffing?" Dawn asked.

"Ya'll smell weird." Vernon said, flashing the ewe an inquisitive glance of his own.

"Vernon." His Mother said with a laugh, drawing his attention back toward the wolfess. Audrey sat with her paws crossed, a mirthful smirk on her muzzle as she shook her head in disbelief.

"Ya'll don't just tell a girl she smells bad so bluntly, 'specially yer mate!" Audrey rolled her eyes. "I raised ya'll to be a gentlemammal!"

Vernon chuckled, releasing his grip around the lamb as he slid back into his own seat.

"I didn't say 'bad'" Vernon clarified, raising a finger to accentuate his point. "I said 'weird'."

Dawn giggled, placing her hooves to her muzzle in an effort to stifle a giggle.

"I didn't think you'd be able to smell Qali on me." Dawn snickered.

Vernon raised his eyebrows in surprise. "I thought that smelled familiar!" The wolf exclaimed.

Dawn rolled her eyes. "Yes, well Qali slept with me last night and-"

"She slept with you!?" Vernon asked aloud in mock shock, doing his best to suppress a rising smile as he prepared to tease the ewe.

"Vernon." Dawn tried to stifle her giggling.

"And here I was worried about my brothers movin' in on my gal..." Vernon chuckled. "Didn't think I'd have to be worryin' about my sisters too!"

"Vernon!" Dawn whined, trying her best to swat the wolf from her seat. Unfortunately for the ewe, the gap was far to wide for her to reach as easily as Vernon had reached her. Dawn's face was flushed, a red tinge now spreading ear to ear as she desperately tried to hide it with her other hoof.

"I mean Malcolm sure..." Vernon continued. "He may be into fellas, but with a ewe as pretty as you I could easily see him switchin' sides."

"Puppy StaaaAAAaaahp!" Dawn whined playfully. The ewe's tiny frame shuddered with each giggle fit that Vernon's continued teasing brought on. "I-it was, I-I me-" The ewe tried to stutter through her laughter.

"Ah, so ya'll girls bunked up after Ada's bed broke?" Audrey interjected. " I guess that makes sense considerin' yer both the smallest."

"Is that what that noise was?' Vernon asked, turning away from the ewe now trying to catch her breath.

Audrey nodded. "I suppose I should have expected ya'll to have heard it."

"Among other things..." Vernon replied, shifting his gaze back toward the recovering ewe.

"W-what did you hear?" Dawn asked, her tone quavering as she tried to collect herself. The dying laughter now at conflict with her rising tone of concern.

Vernon let out a soft chuckle as he rolled his eyes.

"Relax Floofs..." Vernon reassured the ewe. "It was all too muffled to hear properly, aside from Vanna shoutin' somethin' I ain't gonna repeat in polite company." The wolf added, shifting his eyes toward his Mother briefly before bringing them back to Dawn.

"Oh..." Dawn murmured, her blush returning as she placed her hooves over her muzzle.

"Yeah, sounds like ya'll had a lot of fun up there." Vernon said with a soft smile. The wolf reached a paw out to the ewe, placing it gingerly on her shoulder. "I'm glad." Vernon offered the lamb a reassuring grin. The ewe flashed him a meek smile in return, her blush still clearly visible.

"Lil' too much fun." Audrey chuckled. "Consderin' ya'll broke the legs off a bed." Audrey pointed her fork in Dawn's direction, allowing a little bit of syrup to drip off her fork as she waived the cut of toast lazily in the air.

"So is that why ya'll slept so bad Mutton Chop?" Vernon asked. The wolf leaned toward the ewe, placing his arm on the table as he flashed the lamb a sly smile. "Ain't used to sharin' a bed with a mammal other than me?"

Dawn let out a laugh. "More like Qali couldn't keep her paws off of me!" The ewe flicked a hoof lazily in his direction. "I had no idea she was so pawsy in her sleep."

Vernon placed a paw over his muzzle in an effort to keep from laughing.

"She was cuddlin' you?" Vernon asked in a gleeful tone.

Dawn cringed, gritting her teeth mildly as she broke eye contact with the wolf.

"She was practically fused to my head." Dawn replied uneasily. "She was all coiled up in my wool, and no matter how many times I woke her up and got her to stop, she'd just end up back in my wool again." Dawn sighed, leaning her muzzle against her hoof. "After a while I just gave up trying to pry her off."

Despite his best efforts, a few stray laughs slipped out of the wolf's maw as he imagined the scene in his head. The petite vixen tangled up in Dawn's woolly curls, happily snoring away as Dawn lay awake pondering how to deal with the situation. A part of him was sympathetic to his Honey Lamb's plight, surely. But the wolf couldn't deny just how humorous the whole thing must have been.

"Oh mam'..." Vernon chuckled. "What I wouldn't give to have been a fly on the wall fer that!" The wolf laughed. "At least to snap a photo! Think of the Furbook comments that one would get!"

"Veeernon!" Dawn pretended to whine, but the smile on her face told the wolf all he needed to know. At the very least, the playful ribbing seemed to be picking up the ewe's spirits. "It's not funny!"

"Yer right, it ain't funny." Vernon said, putting on a mock serious expression for a moment. "It's hilarious." The wolf snickered.

"PuuuUUUPPPpppy!" Dawn whined louder, her blush intensifying as she seemed to slink lower into her chair.

"Alright ya'll, that's enough." Audrey chuckled, giving Vernon a playful slap. "Settle down a might." Audrey added, lowering her paws to the table to illustrate bringing the noise level down. "Don't wanna wake anyone else up now do we?"

Vernon nodded, clearing his throat slightly as he turned his attention back to the remaining toast on his plate. The last thing he wanted at this point was the other members of the family poking their heads down here now even if they weren't going to the fair with them. The wolf was having far too good a time to risk letting a mammal like Yuri spoil it.

Vernon cut another slim, soggy piece of toast from his stack. But as he raised the caramel oozing pastry to his muzzle, his eyes once again found themselves drifting over to his mate. Dawn had quickly slipped back into her despondent looking state, the ewe once again lamely poking at her food as she let out an uneasy sigh. Vernon grimaced as he lowered his fork back to his plate. Clearly there was more to Dawn's behavior than a simple lack of sleep. Something was on her mind, and Vernon wasn't going to feel any sort of relief unless he got to the bottom of it. The wolf opened his muzzle to speak, but he never got a chance to ask his question.

"Somethin' wrong Darlin'?" Audrey asked, stealing the query from Vernon's own muzzle as if she had read his mind.

The sudden question had caused the ewe to jerk up from her plate again, her attention now quickly drawn to the concerned looking she-wolf.

"O-oh." Dawn murmured in surprise. "I-It's nothing, really."

Vernon could see his mother's brow furrow at the reply, a clear indication the she-wolf was dubious of the ewe's statement at best.

"Alright lil' lamb, out with it." Audrey said, her tone motherly yet playful. "C'mon now, what's botherin' ya?"

The ewe shook her head briskly, stabbing another piece of food with her fork.

"I was just thinking..." Dawn muttered as she spun her fork in a syrupy pool. "I mean I was curious why everyone else isn't coming with us to the fair today."

Vernon raised an eyebrow as he pondered the ewe's question. It was a good one. One that Vernon had never thought to question when his Mother had told them as much in the first place. He was simply happy with the fact that he wouldn't have Yuri around to pester them all day, and thought nothing more than that. He knew in the case of the barbeque, Malcolm was going to have to stay home to prepare for it, but as for the others, it didn't really make sense. Vernon turned to his Mother with a curious expression of his own.

"Yeah..." Vernon said. "I mean you told us they weren't going, but I didn't ask why." The wolf paused, trying to formulate his next words carefully. "I mean, I know Pa...well..."

Vernon glanced at Dawn briefly. He couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence in front of her. "It just don't make sense if we're going against what he said, but only sorta doin' that." The wolf shrugged. "Y'know?"

Audrey closed her eyes, tilting her head down slightly.

"Welp..." Audrey sighed, placing her paws against the sides of her muzzle. The wolfess was silent for a few moments as she rubbed the muscles in her snout.

"I could tell ya'll that I thought everyone else would be of better use settin' up fer the barbeque." Audrey said cooly. "But I ain't never been one to try to muddy my reasonin' about somethin', even if I ain't keen on worryin' the both of ya'll."

Audrey placed her paws on the table. Taking a deep breath, the she-wolf opened her eyes, staring back at the couple with a startlingly serious stare. It was the kind of gaze Vernon had learned to fear when he was a pup, the eyes of a mammal ready to fight.

"I know I said I wanted just the two of ya'll to come run the stand to have fun, and I meant that." Audrey said, her serious gaze remaining fixed and unwavering. "But if Dori decides to stick his big nose in where it doesn't belong, I don't want anyone getting between me and him, understand?"

Vernon blinked in surprise, the wolf still trying to parse exactly what the she-wolf was saying. He briefly turned to check on his mate, only to find that Dawn shared his shocked and puzzled expression.

"The less of the pack around to bicker if things go awry the better." Audrey continued, gesturing a paw toward the couple. "I don't need Zach, or Vanna tryin' to stand in fer me. Complicatin' things and making a bigger scene when it doesn't need to be."

Vernon furrowed his brow quizzically.

"I especially don't need any of them tryin' to say they made the call to have ya'll back at the fair." Audrey pressed her paws together, leaning her muzzle against them as she kept her gaze leveled at the pair. "If Dori wants to try to lay down the law, he's going to be squarin' it with me, ya'll get me?"

Vernon nodded meekly as just what his Mother was saying finally started to register.

" I made the call." Audrey said. "I want you both there, and I want ya'll to have fun." The she-wolf stabbed a finger down on the table.

"The fair is fer everyone." The she-wolf added, waving her finger. " Ain't no law that says otherwise. And that means ain't no lawmammal that has a ground to stand on!"

With that, Audrey's posture seemed to ease. The she-wolf leaned back in her chair, stretching and arm as her expression slipped into something more playful and calm.

"I don't want ya'll to worry about Dori, or the rest of them fairgoers." The wolfess let out another sigh. "I just want ya'll to relax and have a good time. Together." Audrey said with a smile. "'Side's, yer frail ol' mother can't run the stand on her own." The she-wolf chuckled.

Vernon couldn't help but smirk, flashing the she-wolf a dull and dubious glance. The last mammal he would ever describe as frail was his mother. If there was one mammal who could manage to put Dorian in his place, it was her. Sure, Dorian had made a number of decrees over the years when it came to his family. But most of the unjust calls didn't last very long under Audrey's tenacious and rebellious demeanor. It was moments like that which left Vernon to wonder exactly how someone seemingly as wild as his Mother even managed to settle down with such a button-downed, authoritarian wolf.

But the topic at hand had managed to stir some of the wolfs nagging doubts and worries. Drawing those uncertainties up to the surface, and pressing him to mention them.

"But what about the fairgoers?" Vernon mumbled, almost reluctantly. "I mean Ana and Ken-"

"Oh pshaw!" Audrey tutted, flicking a lazy paw in Vernon's direction. " I'm certain those two won't be showin' their face at that fair anytime soon after yesterday!"

Audrey flashed the wolf a smirk, leaning in close to Vernon as she placed a paw near her muzzle to try to hide her mouth from the ewe.

"Considerin' the way they left the fair I doubt everything is hunky-dory in the Loupon household." Audrey chuckled softly.

"But surely Mr. Ruddy, or even some of the other fairgoers could-"

"I'm tellin' ya'll they are far too meek to speak up without that agitatin' she-wolf around." Audrey cut Dawn off. "And with me watchin' over ya'll, no-one'll dare say a bad word to ya!" Audrey said defiantly, bringing her paw down sharply against the table.

Dawn still seemed uncertain of Audrey's declaration, but the she-wolf was quick to pick up on it.

"Aw c'mon Dawn, trust me!" Auddey grinned widely at the ewe. "I ain't gonna let anyone hurt one of my own as long as I'm watchin' them, ya'll have my word!"

Vernon watched as Dawn seemed to be fighting back a smirk. It was clear she was still holding on to some reservations about the whole affair just as he was. But his Mother's unflappable optimism was an infectious sort. It was impossible to fight it off when she hoisted it on you, and she knew just how to work a smile out of even the gloomiest mammal.

"B-But Dorian..." Dawn trailed off, still trying to fight the growing smile she was hiding behind her hooves.

"But Dorian nuthin'!" Audrey spat, bringing her paw down against the table again loudly. "If he even shows his big stupid muzzle around our stand I'll bop him into next week!" Audrey grinned, raising her arm in a mock punch.

That was enough to break the ewe. The sheep burst into giggling, her hooves still clasped tightly against her muzzle despite losing her composure. There was simply no winning against Audrey's enthusiasm.

"Alright, alright." Vernon said with a laugh. The wolf gestured his paws in a similar way to how his Mother had earlier in reference to the noise level.

"We're gettin' too loud again." Vernon chuckled. "And I'd rather not have Yuri spoil this breakfast."

Audrey was quick to stifle herself, bringing a paw sharply to her lips as she smirked back at Vernon.

"Here I am actin' like the pup now..." Audrey chuckled quietly.

Dawn took a few deep breaths seemingly in an effort to chase off her remaining laughter as she tried to compose herself. At the very least the ewe was smiling now, her posture improving as the wolf watched her calm down. Soon enough, the ewe actually began to eat the prench toast that had been dissolving in a sea of syrup on her plate.

"So what about the others?" Dawn asked idly as she slipped a piece of toast into her muzzle. "Surely they at least want some of this fantastic breakfast?"

Audrey let out a soft chuckle.

"Malcolm's got 'em covered." The she-wolf said with a grin. "Whenever they all wake up he can fix 'em some fancy prench toast just as good as mine."

"Maybe not quite as good as yers Ma." Vernon said with a chuckle as he scooped a large chunk of the cinnamon swirled bread onto his fork.

Audrey placed a paw to her muzzle, trying to hide the slight blush as she waived her other paw in Vernon's direction.

"Oh hush now!" Audrey cooed. "Malcolm does a fine job."

Vernon rolled his eyes, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Just take a compliment Ma." The wolf chuckled.

Audrey cut herself another small slice of her toast, stabbing it with her fork before waiving it Vernon's way.

"It's true." Auddey retorted. "I mean, that boy's a real chef, not some home taught housewife like me."

"It is fantastic Mrs. Hu-" The ewe paused to correct herself. "I mean Audrey."

The wolf shifted her fork Dawn's way, dabbing it toward the ewe.

"That's right." The she-wolf said with a grin. "No need for formalities with my daughter-in-law."

The ewe seemed to frown slightly at the she-wolf's words. Dawn glanced down at her plate briefly before seeming to shake off whatever was bothering her. Returning her attention to the she-wolf, the ewe's smile returned.

"Thank you Audrey." Dawn replied. "Really."

"Yer quite welcome Darlin'." Audrey said, finally bringing the food on her fork towards her muzzle.

"So, what exactly is the plan fer today Ma?" Vernon asked, quirking a brow.

As the she-wolf slid the bite of food into her mouth, she leaned in her seat, allowing her free arm to rest on the table. "Welp..." Audrey rolled her eyes slightly, lazily waving her paw. " I figure between the three of us we can pack the van up in a few minutes." Audrey shrugged. "I mean, we did leave it sorta half loaded last night, so there ain't much work to do."

"And then?" Dawn asked. the ewe leaning over her plate as she eyed the wolfess expectantly.

Audrey looked toward the ceiling. "Well, then it's just a matter of gettin' to the fair." The she-wolf scratched her chin softly as she seemed to be mulling over the process.

"We can all take the loader truck out since that's really all we'll need." Audrey bobbed her head slightly as if affirming something to herself. "Then it's just a matter of loadin' the stand and getting to work."

Vernon watched as Dawn began to wring her hooves nervously, a slightly worried expression overtaking her as her eyes returned to looking at her plate.

"I h-hope I can help." Dawn muttered.

Audrey let out a single, sharp laugh. "You'll be fine Darlin', trust me."

Dawn looked back up at Audrey with a slight wince.

"B-but I can't really cook much of anything..." Dawn murmured, tapping her hooves together. "I know a few prey meals but honestly-"

Audrey rolled her eyes. "You'll be fine Darlin'." The wolfess said reassuringly. "'Sides I'll be there every step of the way. I ain't gonna let ya fall."

Dawn offered the she-wolf a small smile.

"Plus I know a thing or two about makin' Ma's pies." Vernon interjected, trying to add to the ewe's rising confidence.

"Between the two of ya'll yer gonna do a fine job." Audrey added, reaching a paw out to Vernon's head and ruffling the fur on top. Vernon moved away, swatting back at his Mother's affectionate gesture.

"MA!" Vernon whined.

"Oh hush!" Audrey tutted as she returned to her plate. The she-wolf cut herself another slice of bread and idly swirled it around the syrup pooled on her plate.

"After we're done fer the day, it's just a matter of packin' up and ridin' back home." Audrey continued, raising the sopping chunk of toast to her lips. "By then the rest of the pack should have the Barbeque all set to go. So ya'll can just keep enjoyin' yerselves."

"Ah, the barbeque." Vernon said with a comfortable sigh. "Now there's somethin' to look forward too." The wolf pat his stomach affectionately. "Nobody Barbeques quite like Mal-"

Vernon paused, his attention switching back Dawn's way as the ewe continued to eat her breakfast. The wolf hadn't given thought to exactly what he could offer his mate in terms of the family barbeque. It was a largely pred affair, and as such they never really had anything made up for prey aside from simple side dishes.

"Ma?" Vernon glanced back at his Mother, concern lacing his features. " What about Dawn?"

"Mhhm?" Audrey grumbled curiously as she chewed another mouthful of food.

"I mean, does Malcolm have anythin' she can eat?" Vernon added. "I mean, her diet is-"

Audrey was quick to dismiss the wolf with the wave of a paw.

"Malcolm already has a few prey specialty dishes planned fer Dawn, don't ya'll worry!" With a grin, Audrey turned her attention back to the diminutive ewe. The she-wolf quirked an eyebrow.

"I hope ya'll like surprises." Audrey said with a chuckle.

Dawn giggled in response.

Vernon let out a relieved sigh. It seemed as though everything was more or less covered as far as plans for the afternoon went. The only thing he had to worry about now was simply the outside forces that could cause those seemingly mundane activities to prove rather difficult. Vernon didn't doubt his Mother's assertions about the fair-goers, or his Father. He was sure the she-wolf would live up to her declarations should they be faced with any hardship while running the stall. But even the risk of such an encounter, regardless of how his Mother handled it still put the wolf on edge. He just didn't want anything to further ruin the prospect of Dawn having a good time. But running the stall seemed like the more favorable choice over remaining at the house all day. At least at the stall Yuri was guaranteed to be miles away from him, and thus unable to torment the couple.

"Oh!" Dawn jerked to attention, as if she had come to a sudden realization. The ewe quickly placed her utensils down, dabbing her muzzle with a napkin.

"May I be excused?" The tiny ewe asked. "I didn't exactly get a chance to go to the bathroom earlier and I-"

Audrey held up a paw silencing the ewe. The she-wolf rolled her eyes, flashing the ewe a smirk.

"Darlin'," Audrey replied. "You don't even have to ask."

Dawn gave a brisk nod, and Vernon watched as she slipped off the stack of phone books in her chair before disappearing below the table's edge. The wolf leaned in his seat just enough to catch the top of her woolly poof as it bobbed along the table, and watched until it shifted toward the Kitchen doorway before finally disappearing completely. Vernon watched for a few more moments, remaining quiet as he listened for the telltale shuttering of the bathroom door as the ewe closed it.

With a soft and familiar 'clack', the wolf knew the coast was finally clear.

Vernon turned in the blink of an eye, the wolf spinning in his seat to face his mother. The wolf practically hung off of his chair as he eyed the she-wolf expectantly. Audrey hadn't moved much since Dawn's departure, the she-wolf calmly slipping another morsel of food into her muzzle.

"Where is it!?" Vernon whined excitedly.

"Is that how you ask yer Mother fer somethin'?" Audrey tutted, not even batting an eye at the wolf's distress.

Vernon let out a quiet grumble, placing his paw to his head in frustration at his Mother's perceived teasing. The wolf straightened up in his seat, taking a moment to clear his throat in order to perfectly recite exactly what he knew the she-wolf wanted to hear without error.

"Mom." Vernon said calmly. "Do you have my bracelet on you?"

Audrey smirked slightly, but otherwise the wolfess remained unfazed by Vernon's address. The she-wolf slipped another slice of food into her muzzle, chewing it agonizingly slowly as she paid Vernon little mind. Vernon was clenching his teeth as he waited for a response, the anticipation gnawing at him relentlessly.

Finally, the she-wolf offered the wolf a simple, soft affirmative nod.

Vernon jerked forward slightly in excitement, but was quick to calm himself. He had to keep his composure or he was certain his Mother would continue to drag this affair along. Vernon sat straight one more, doing his best to continue to appear calm.

"Okay." Vernon said with a sigh. "May I have it?"

Audrey quietly scooped up the last of her prench toast, stabbing it with her fork and swirling it within the remaining pool of syrup and caramel. The she-wolf raised it to her muzzle even slower than before, stopping just short of her lips as the wolf waited anxiously for her response. She held her fork there allowing a deafening silence to hang for what seemed like an eternity.

Finally, the she-wolf spoke, and Vernon found the food-laden fork pointed his way rather than where he had expected it to go.

"May I have it...?" Audrey tailed off, bobbing the fork slightly with each word. "What?"

Vernon groaned. The she-wolf's sudden adherence to formality was clearly just to toy with him, and the game was starting to wear thin. Then again, the wolf only had himself to blame for keeping it going. He had forgotten the most crucial part of the song and dance when it came to respectfully asking his Mother for something.

Vernon let out an exhausted sigh.

"May I have it..." Vernon offered as wide a smile as he could to the nonplussed she-wolf. "Please?" The wolf asked.

Audrey's grin grew, and the she-wolf finally turned to acknowledge her son. Placing her fork down, the wolfess reached into her breast pocket. After a brief bit of fumbling she extracted Vernon's prize.

'thwap, thwap' Vernon's tail was already off like a shot at the mere glimpse of his treasure. And the wolf quickly reached out to snag it from his Mother's paw only for her to quickly jerk it away, her smile widening into something more mischievous.

"MA!" Vernon snapped, his patience worn through.

"Ah, ah, ah." Audrey tutted, waggling a finger at the wolf.

"First tell me that I'm the best Mother in all of Animalia." Audrey snickered. "And that without my help ya'll wouldn't know hock from yer hackles!"

"MAAA!" Vernon groaned in annoyance.

Audrey rolled her eyes, shaking her head dismissively.

"Alright, alright..." The she-wolf sighed. "You boys are no fun anymore, I swear..."

The she-wolf gestured her free paw toward Vernon.

"Hold out yer paw." Audrey said, extending her own paw outward expectantly.

Vernon extended his paw, moving it just underneath his mother's, ready to catch the precious trinket. Once the she-wolf was seemingly satisfied, she opened her paw, allowing the beaded bracelet to fall gingerly into Vernon's grip.

As soon as Vernon felt the plastic touch his pads he immediately snapped it up, pulling it tightly against his chest before Audrey had even moved her still open paw.

Audrey rolled her eyes again.

"My little Puppy." Audrey shook her head. "It ain't a newborn baby bird, ya'll don't need to treat it like it'll break if ya'll look at it wrong." The she-wolf snickered.

Vernon met her statement with an eye roll of his own. He couldn't expect his Mother to fully understand why the friendship bracelet was so important to him. It had become the crucial lynchpin in his plan to salvage the weekend for his mate. While it now looked increasingly likely that it was going to take more than one weekend to wear his Father down to get his approval for a tithe, at the very least he could make the ewe's first visit to the Ranch a positive memory with his trinket.

The wolf carefully opened his clasped paw, keeping it pooled against his chest as he glanced down at the plastic jewelry.

Not much had changed in regards to how it looked, it was a simple set of plastic children's beads after all. But the fresh dabs of paint and enamel were easily noticeable in the places where parts of the letters had worn away. There was no mistaking what the bracelet said now. The comfortable deep brown satin banding holding the letters together just as they had been all those years before.

"Floofy's Best Friend." Vernon muttered appreciatively to himself, a warm smile crawling across his muzzle.

"Ain't that adorable..." Vernon's attention was stolen back by his Mother. The she-wolf was now leaning both arms on the table, allowing her head to rest on her paws as she watched the wolf's expressions. "Ya'll still get that gleam in yer eye like when you were a little Pup, it's just so cute."

Vernon let out a slight scoff, more at the statement than his Mother's attitude. He certainly was grateful, and the last thing he wanted to seem was disrespectful after what his Mother had done.

"Thank you so much Ma, really." Vernon said with a soft smile.

"Seems like it was just yesterday you were still my little Puppy..." Audrey seemingly hadn't heard him, the she-wolf momentarily lost in her memories. Her voice had wavered slightly, a sadness evident in tone as she reminisced.

But the she-wolf didn't linger on it long, and with a brisk shake of her head Audrey sat straight up in her chair. The she-wolf cleared her throat, seemingly attempting to shake off her burst of motherly nostalgia.

"Anyhoo..." Audrey muttered, adding another few throat clearing coughs for good measure. "I think ya'll should just pocket that fer now." The wolfess advised, waving a finger. "Slip it on at the stall and don't even mention it."

Vernon quirked an eyebrow in confusion.

"What? Why?" The wolf was quick to respond.

Audrey rolled her eyes.

"'Cause imagine how much more of a surprise it'll be if she finds it out on her own." Audrey said with a smile. "She'll probably squeal with delight if she ain't prepared for it. Ya'll can't tell me you wouldn't love that."

In all of the dream scenarios Vernon had played out the previous evening, simply allowing the ewe to discover it on his arm without mentioning was an idea he hadn't even considered. But the way his Mother had pitched it to him easily made the idea trump every other paws down. The wolf knew that was the way he had to do it, the ultimate surprise.

Vernon nodded briskly in agreement, flashing the she-wolf a wide grin before returning to eyeing his treasure.

"Y'know..." Vernon murmured softly.

"Ya'll really are the best Mother in all Animalia." The wolf said with a chuckle.

Vernon looked up to catch his Mother staring back at him in surprise, her paw over her muzzle as her eyes glimmered with what he could only assume was rising tears. But she quickly turned her gaze away, trying to hide the fact that he had caught her emotionally off guard.

"Aw Puppy, d-don't tease yer old Momma now." Audrey tried to sound firm, but her tone quavered with emotion, and Vernon couldn't help but smile.

The familiar clack of the bathroom door pulled the wolf away from the warm moment he had shared with his mother. The wolf fumbled with the bracelet, rushing to stuff it in his pocket as the familiar woolly poof began to trace the edge of the table once more. He finally managed to completely bury it in his pocket just in time for the ewe to begin her struggle back into he seat.

"Need help Honey Lamb?" Vernon asked coolly, doing his best to play off the frantic scramble he had been in seconds before.

"N-no." Dawn groaned, as the ewe began to surface from below the table edge. "I-I've got I-It."

It took the ewe a few moments on her own, but soon enough the ewe was back in her seat. Dawn took a moment to adjust herself, straightening her skirt before finally turning her attention back to the rest of the table.

"That's better." Dawn said with a sigh.

Vernon chuckled. "Yeah sorry Darlin'." The wolf uttered, scratching the back of his neck. "I probably should have asked ya'll on our way downstairs if ya'll needed the rest room."

Dawn chuckled. "It's fine." The ewe replied, picking up her utensils again. "I just hope I didn't miss anything interesting." The ewe asked, raising the wolves a curious eyebrow.

Vernon and his Mother shared a brief glance.

"Nah, just more fair prep talk Floofs, nothin' serious." Vernon replied, flashing the ewe a grin.

"Yeah, I was just tellin' Vernon how he's still gonna be on dish duty at the stand." Audrey added.

Vernon turned to his Mother in surprise, only to find the she-wolf grinning at him with a wide a mischievous smile.

"What, ya'll thought I forgot about yer punishment?" Audrey chuckled. " 'Sides, someone's got to do 'em. The stall doesn't have a dishwasher after all."

Vernon let out a groan as Audrey and Dawn broke into a fit of giggling.

"Great, she did remember." The wolf lamented to himself, running a paw over his scalp as the girls laughed around him. The wolf's paws were still wrinkled from the previous evening. But Vernon supposed it was a small price to pay now that he had his friendship bracelet. The joy he knew it would bring Dawn to see it would be well worth perpetually soggy paws.

#Zootopia #Assistant Mayor Bellwether #dawn bellwether #fanfiction #furry #wastedtimeee #zoosona

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