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not-rab · 5 months

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13-year-old Sirius: You know what, I think it's time we started swearing. When we go downstairs for breakfast, I'll swear first and then you.

12-year-old Regulus: Okay.

[downstairs]

Walburga: What do you want for breakfast?

Sirius: I'll have Cocoa Puffs, bitch.

Walburga: Go to your room!

Walburga, to Regulus: And what do you want?

Regulus: Dunno but it won't be fucking Cocoa Puffs.

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that-bitch-kat3 · 6 months

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walburga: you’re not good enough for my son

remus: you’re not good enough for your son

walburga: excuse me?

remus: you heard me.

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phoneypotatoes · 1 month

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Harry: *finds a stray cat*

Harry: Can we keep it?

Regulus: Your dad is allergic.

Harry: Father can stay outside.

#incorrect quotes #marauders #marauders era #james potter #regulus black #jegulus #harry potter

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daddiesdrarryy · 3 months

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Barty: You slept with Potter?

Regulus: I didn’t know what else to do! He had those big, sad eyes. I couldn’t help it!

Evan: …sure, sounds like you had no other choice

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my-castles-crumbling · 5 months

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Falling asleep in the dorms…

“Sirius?”

“Yeah?”

“I don’t think I like Evans anymore.”

“Shit mate, took you long enough.”

“Heh. Yeah.”

…

“Sirius?”

“Yeah, Prongs?”

“I might like boys. Also. Like as well as girls.”

“Join the club, Prongs. Just stay the fuck away from Moony.”

“Noted.”

…

“Sirius?”

“Yeah, mate?”

“What if I like a particular bloke?”

“…it’s not me, is it? Because Moony would probably kill you.”

“No.”

….

“Sirius?”

“Yes, Prongs?”

“It’s your brother.”

“I know.”

“You know?”

“Yeah, I was just fucking with you before.”

“Right.”

…

“Sirius?”

“Yes Prongs?”

“That’s…it’s okay?”

“Yes, James. I’d rather it be you than anyone else, to be honest.”

“Alright.”

…

“Sirius?”

“Go the fuck to sleep, Prongs. We’ll come up with a plan to woo him tomorrow.”

“Alright.”

….

“James?”

“What’s up, Padfoot?”

“Take care of him, alright?”

“…..yeah. Yeah, of course.”

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chasingthestarss · 3 months

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James: I think I’m in love with you!

Regulus :

James:

Regulus: *pulls out a big binder with pieces of paper sticking out everywhere

James: what’s this?

Regulus: Our wedding plans, I’ve been planning it since first year. Remus taught me to scrap book.

James: *in love

#marauders incorrect quotes #marauders era #jegulus #remus and regulus #regulus black #dead gay wizards #james potter #remus lupin

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rhetorical-conscience · 3 months

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James: We need to talk about your mental health.

Regulus, trying to change the subject: Actually, what I need is to be dicked down right now.

James:

Regulus:

James, removing his tie: You know, one of these days that isn't going to work-

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loz-tearsofahomo · 3 months

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James: and so I'm pretty sure I'm in love with Reg-

Evan: I'm sorry?

James: Well hes-

Evan: No I'm just sorry.

Barty: yeah mate praying for you

#marauders #hp #Slytherin skittles #jegulus #james potter #starchaser #regulus black #barty crouch jr #evan rosier #the slytherin skittles #the marauders #marauders era #marauders incorrect quotes #harry potter incorrect quotes #harry potter #loz posts #rosekiller

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moonytoastx · 4 months

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Regulus: "Your eyes are red. Are you high again?"

Barty, imitating Regulus: "ArE yOu HiGH AGaIN?"

Barty: "No, bitch. I've been crying.

Regulus:

Regulus: "Oh."

#marauders era #moony wormtail padfoot and prongs #incorrect quotes #james & peter & remus & sirius #moony x padfoot #wolfstar #dorlene #lily evans #marlene mckinnon #jegulus #slytherin skittles #barty crouch jr #barty is my spirit animal

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theprongspotter · 6 months

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Sirius, coming out: I don’t like women.

James, gasping: You’re a misogynist?!

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gh0stlylace · 3 months

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Harry standing on his bed at home during sixth year,singing into his hair brush as music blasts from his muggle radio: “But I am my father’s daughter, So maybe I can fix him”

James who’s leaning against his door frame watching him with a confused expression: “What do you think he’s singing about?”

Regulus sighing as he stares at the quidditch sweatshirt Harry has on that clearly said “Malfoy” across the back: “Not a clue babe, Let’s go make dinner”

#draco malfoy #harry potter #james potter #jegulus #marauders era #regulus black #remus lupin #drarry #harry potter x draco malfoy #draco x harry #harry x draco #incorrect marauders quotes #incorrect quotes #incorrect harry potter quotes #dead gay wizards #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter marauders #draco lucius malfoy #draco fanfiction

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not-rab · 5 months

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James: How did you get your brother to co-operate with you?

Sirius: I threatened to reveal his dark secret.

James: Which is what?

Sirius: I have no idea, I was bluffing, but it must be something horrible.

James *nervous sweating*:

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apoetsworld · 19 days

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James: Tell your brother that its important to talk about his feelings!!!

Sirius: pfft why?? Its not.

Regulus: SEE. We grew up just ignoring every feeling, and look how great we turned out!

James: THATS TRAUMA, YOU WERE REPRESSED-

Regulus: HAVE YOU EVER CONSIDERED THE POSSIBILITY THAT ITS JUST MY PERSONALITY, MY LIFESTYLE-

James: YOUR TRAUMA-

Regulus: TRAUMA BUILDS CHARACTER JAMES

#trauma builds character #-r.a.b.#jegulus #marauders #regulus black #starchaser #james potter #incorrect marauders quotes #the marauders #marauders era

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daddiesdrarryy · 4 months

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Remus: Right hand blue

James: This Twister game is so fun!

Regulus: Not that fun. Are you sure this is right, Remus? Potter is practically on top of me

Remus: Of course it is!

Sirius, whispers: Is it?

Remus: I haven’t used the spinner in half an hour

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my-castles-crumbling · 4 months

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Gay Panic?

First year:

James, casually: So my uncle has a husband.

Sirius, shocked: You can do that?

James: Yeah, I reckon so.

-

Second year:

Sirius: So I have a gay uncle too.

James, not really bothered: Weird, mate. Guess a lot of people are gay.

Sirius, a bit contemplative: Hahaha. Weird.

-

Third year:

Sirius, nervously: Do you ever want to kiss people?

James: Girls, right? You mean girls?

Sirius, even more nervously: Erm, yeah. Girls.

James: Yeah, I like Evans. She’s like…bossy-hot.

-

Fourth year:

Remus: So…I'm gay.

Sirius, having a gay crisis: Ohhhh! Erm, we support you!

James, also panicking, thinking of gay Regulus: Yes. We're allies!

Sirius, still internally panicking: Such allies.

-

Fifth year:

Sirius, freaking out again: So, you know how we're like…allies?

James, paranoid, worried Sirius saw him staring at Reggie: Yeah?

Sirius: Allies can have like…gay dreams, right? And still be straight?

James, relieved: Oh. Oh, yeah! Absolutely. I do, too! And I'm a thousand percent straight.

-

Sixth year:

Sirius, really having a crisis after Remus returned to school six inches taller: It's totally normal as a straight person to have a crush on another bloke, right?

James, still fully in denial even though he's been stalking Reg on the Map: Erm, yeah. Definitely. We're both straight.

-

Seventh year:

Sirius, having just kissed Remus: So actually Im definitely gay and I'm dating Moony and that crush and those dreams were all very gay.

James: Well FUCK what am I, then?

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nixnight1 · 4 months

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Regulus high with Barty at the Potter's

Sirius: Can I get in here? I need the- Oh my god!!

Regulus using Sirius' clothes and makeup: It's like looking on a mirror!!

Sirius: No it isn’t, Regulus >:(

Regulus: Who's Regulus?

Barty: I already can't tell who is who

Sirius: Take that stuff off

Regulus: Moony! Get in here and settle this!

Sirius: Don't call my boyfriend "Moony"

Remus: What? OH woah-hey Hey, travel size Pads! Awww

Sirius: Moonyyyy, you're encouraging him

James: I need the bathroom... Oh wow this is confusing

Sirius: No, it's not!

Regulus: You're my family and I love you all, but I'm cooler than all of you!

Sirius: I don't say that

James: Well that's all you say

Remus and Barty: Yeah

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