#the me inside of me is just sincerely me

[bonefall]

I recognize a lot of ADHD symptoms in Nightheart too.

The thinking everyone hates him is a big thing, taking rejection harder than it should be,

You're right... the Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria... I am Nightheart's therapist and I am slapping him with so many mental illnesses.

#ALSO FOR THE RECORD I DONT HAVE BPD #I just have people I love who do #And take a sincere and adoring interest in how their minds work #I do have ADHD though. Recently diagnosed. #But I've known my entire life. #But anyhow #I just like BPD I think it's neat. It reminds me of people I love. And loved. It's so demonized and I hope that I can help ppl understand #It's just an emotional regulation disorder. There is no 'bad person' disease. #People with BPD can be good or bad. #Btw I plan to do this with NPD too at some point. I did a leetle research and know where to start now #But I haven't picked a cat to get it #And I have personal close experience with BPD so like. That's why it comes up so much. I feel confident in how I portray it #And I get super good feedback from people who have BPD so I think I'm doing good #Also inside joke lmao; Bird Perception Disorder #Because for SOME REASON I keep using birds as a BPD metaphor #And partner found that hilarious #The birds are being perceived #bone babble

[clever-and-unique-name]

I get so fucking sentimental about friends growing into themselves and exploring their passions and interests, I love watching them learn about themselves and lean into what makes them happy, please always know I am cheering you on and I can't wait to see what you do next <33

#listen. the other side of me having lifelong depression is having Deep and Uncontrollable Positive Feelings about other people Fully Living #I want to see you do things that make you feel fully alive!!! #I want you to feel at home inside yourself and your life! #and when you do. I am going to CRY. HAPPILY. #idk man I just want us all to make it #genuinely and sincerely #you all deserve the world #WHY DID THE BAPPENING UNLOCK GENUINE EMOTION IN ME BTW?

[millenniummmbop]

"Hey bop what's ur favorite type of rivalshipping content" I'm glad u definitely did not ask it's this

#btw #if u even care #early 2000s amvs are literally the most perfect art form i am saying this sincerely and unironically #i close my eyes and a million of these things just play on infinite loop inside my brain #not my art so #delete later #but i need u guys to kno that this is the vibe for tonight #btw all amv makers get a free lifetime pass to use my art for any and all amvs they wanna make #i love amvs so much goddamn #ignore me #hanging a sign on the window of this blog that says 'amv makers eat here free'

[tallymali]

i know this is a terrible awful ungrateful thing to say. but i sincerely hate my illness for not being terminal.

#i no longer have days when i wish to continue living #i went through all the childhood trauma and the failed suicide attempts #and i worked my ass off in therapy to get to a point where my brain was not a terrible place to live #and i sincerely felt happy about living and having a future #and then this happened. #and i dont know if i will ever live normally again #theres a chance im just gonna spend the rest of my life trapped inside my house numb from pain #so like. for the people who ask when im gonna post on onlyfans/reddit/whatever again: i dont know #i know you’re not asking that in an unkind way #i know its a compliment #but i truly dont know if ill even still be alive in a years time #i dont want to kms but i also dont have it in me to live my life like this #so yeah my answer to everything is i dont know and idk if i ever will know #sorry this is fuckin grim.

[evansbby]

more hate incoming

#Cole turner looks like too much like chris and Andy barber soooo #it’s kinda like 😒😒 the ick is seeping through #MY BIGGEST BEEF IS WHY IS CHRIS DOING RANDOM MOVIES LIKE THIS PLEASE #this and then the rock xmas movie like???? #bruh 😭😭😭😭 #do better for yourself #GOD I CAN SEE EVERYONE INFOLLOWING ME KM SORRY IM AORRY #it’s just if I don’t say it here it’ll stew inside me #sincerely please don’t unfollow me I love y’all #but at my core I can’t help my feelings sjsjsjsjak #anyways a lot of the scenes were giving hallmark movie #like why isn’t bro doing big budget movies or DRAMA movies or idk!!!! something of substance #no please y’all don’t unfollow me I’ll probably get over it in a while #it’s just my personal opinion #the whole trailer gave me ick #i can see y’all rolling your eyes at me ajdjsjsk I am sorry

[butchviking]

i dont know how to be smaller. i dont know how 2 b anything else.

#sometimes ppl say to me things like 'how do you stay true to yourself?' 'how do you stand up for yourself?' 'how do you stay sincere?' #and i never know what 2 say bc well. im not doing it on purpose. i simply cannot be anything else. #what did magnetictapedatastorage say? 'the closet is three inches tall i do not fit inside'? #that but its not just abt my lesbianism its abt all of who i am as a person. #im not saying i would choose 2 be smaller if i could. im just saying. well. i wouldn't know. because i can't. #fjgjdkdkk sorry we've reached the sadposting portion of the night. shhh its important that i express myself #at the end of a nice day i must scrape the sludge from inside my ribs and plop it down on a table and wail over it. its like cleansing. #god i have got to start doing something creative i have to learn to draw or write or make music or something i cannot keep doing this

[daz4i]

I'm gonna let you in on a badly kept secret. most of my dazai analysis is truly just me projecting. but being decent enough at bullshitting to make it sound convincing so ppl usually end up agreeing with my takes

#what i lack in actual reading comprehension and analysis abilities i make up for in charisma and fake confidence #ahdjfllhh or maybe my projections just fit! maybe i accidentally do make good analysis! or at least offer alternative readings! #anyway i was thinking abt his relationship with pain again. and i started writing an essay in my head #before realizing I'm basically describing my own relationship with it. and that my experiences are not universal esp in regards to that #but just bc they're not universal doesn't mean they're nonexistent! who's to say dazai doesn't have them as well 😩 #fr tho i think with a character like him that hides a lot of himself and his true feelings. insisting on one 'canon' reading is dumb #the whole point is you view him through your own personal experience. imo. that's what he'd want too #the emptiness inside him is meant to be filled by his audience. whether inside the story or outside it. i think. #that's why he is one thing around fyodor and another around atsushi and i see him one way and you see him in another one #and all these readings are right and all these versions are still him. you don't know what's inside the donut after all #but again :) even this part could be just me projecting :) but see how nicely i bullshitted through it to make it sound deep? #(<- being sincere but hiding it with irony as to not get rejected. as one does) (<- admits it bc who tf would get this far into my tags) #(but thank you if you did ily) (also shoutout to anyone who ever validated my unhinged analysis/projection mwah)

[floral-hex]

My therapist asked if I dressed ironically and I had to assure him that no, I just really like florals

#he said I wear a lot of flowery clothes and ‘funny shirts’ #which I mean I don’t even wear a ton of florals. just like a flowery shirt or pair of pants #but I mean… plants look nice. flowers look nice. flowers… pretty #and ‘funny shirts’??? that just hurts #I’ve only worn band shirt and dress shirts. today was a kind of cute Godzilla shirt but I’m not doing it to be ironic #I’m too old to like things ironically #just let me be cringe with sincerity #tbf I’d just told him I’d been goth in high school and I guess he thought that carried over and was me trying to get people’s attention #and I mean I guess a lot of people pick their outfits with some idea of public perception in mind #so I don’t think it’s unreasonable to imagine how others would perceive me #but I dress like a boring dad a lot of the time. not anything exciting #I swear I’m still goth inside. I promise I’m still a spooky boy. but the kind of spooky boy that wears shorts w/ the occasional polo shirt🤷🏻 #oh god… I’m a sellout 😣 #we were talking about how self conscious I am and how I hate possibly being viewed as this big grumpy looking dude #but whatever we’ve all got problems pppssssshawwww #and I dunno… this is too much talking for a dumb text post #whoops #you can ignore this #text

[jemmaredgravewhore]

PFFFFF i’m watching my vids from my concert last night and i rly said “ik all the lyrics and i’m abt to make it everyone’s problem” 😭😭

#this is a sincere apology to anyone who was anywhere near me last night #idk what came over me #i swear i’m usually quite good at containing the feral animal inside of me that just wants to SCREAM slovenian words i don’t understand #joker out #joker out glasgow

[lyriumsings]

i always forget how much i love korra she lights up my soul the only bisexual woc icon to exist for me in my teens in like a super popular media like atla like the space she has in my heart is so!!! she’s so perfect to me!! i just wish her story and supporting cast had been as good as aangs her villains and like tenzin and lin were mwah chefs kiss but ooooo if i could do it all over again i have so many opinions

#i don’t care for mako and bolin #or that weird love triangle they had going on #like the started off ok in the beginning #but they just sincerely lack the depth of the original gaang #tbh tenzins old enough they should’ve just given him a kid korras age #to be part of korras group #it would’ve been interesting having an airbender who knows the city inside and out showing korra around #but also sympathizing with her lack of experience in the city #bc it feels like tenzin would keep them quite sheltered #like #idk mako and bolin just are so lacking to me #i need to be reminded about asami #but also why the fuck wouldn’t korra know about chi blocking lmao #i just realized that just now #she doesn’t know it’s a thing and i’m like??? ty lee is a part of aangs story #katara personally experienced it and is a part of korras training #lol anyway weird #like korra has really good storylines #but not alll of it is good in the way i feel aangs was #i think ppl who think korra isn���t as good as aang are so full of it korra as a characted i have literally no notes #i just think they had too many ideas at once and yet also not enough backstory

[captain-coven]

sometimes i just think about the scene where veronica and jd write heather c’s fake suicide note

but they’re performing sincerely me from dear evan hansen.

#this probably isn't an original thought #veronica = evan #heather = connor #jd = jared #the me inside of me is just sincerely me #in a different font #dear evan hansen #evan hansen #connor murphy #heathers #heathers the musical #heathers: the musical #veronica sawyer #heather chandler #jason dean #musicals #musical #musical theatre #theatre

[alwaysbethewest]

Hot take: it’s okay to fantasize about celebrities, actually

#🤷‍♀️ #i feel really confused by the wide gulf some of y’all are drawing #between on one hand thinking that thirsting after every body part of a character is okay #that compiling bulge pics and lusting over them is okay #and on the other hand thinking it’s a mortal sin worthy of ostracization #if you write down a fantasy you had about dating the actor himself #like??? #it’s not that i don’t see where the differences lie between character fanfic and rpf #but i really think some of y’all are fooling yourselves by pretending like you’re not also ‘objectifying’ the actor #it’s still ultimately pedro’s body in your frankie morales body worship fics #and his dick inside javi’s jeans #sorry! #and i really am not trying to be mean with this post #i love this fandom and want us to be a happy thriving community #it’s just— #some of the things i’ve seen this week have had such a hyper-judgmental holier than thou tone to them #as if these personal boundaries and opinions are actually an Objective Moral Truth #and it’s really rubbed me the wrong way #and also left me feeling genuinely sincerely curious about how and where you choose to draw your lines #to decide that what you like is fine but what other people like is unacceptably abhorrent #because from my perspective some of these things are not so far apart #and maybe everything is not so black and white

[noxtivagus]

apollo just sent this to me

#🌙.rambles #[ ffxiv. ] #all of these ppl are my fave charas >.> #BRUH THIS REALLY HAS NEARLY ALL OF MY TOP FAVES #wahh urianger n the way he loves <3 #alphinaud yes..... pls i do admit ppl like him really r especially special to me #someone just so sincerely kind and authentic. someone you can trust and be vulnerable around with no fear. #'Alphinaud is the kind of person who makes you feel safe and that’s what you value the most.' #ofc alphy's a sweet lil trustworthy boy. i admire how he always strives for improvement. #he's mature but in this way that. he's still a boy. i find that rather adorable and charming about him #aaaa i rmber thancred was one of my first top faves in ffxiv <3 #haurchefant. 'You tend to hold onto the past.' yeah fine i admit it yes #both strength n weakness. so true bestie. whenever they reference him i really do always become a mess #AYMERIC DE BOREL. as soon as i saw his face earlier i smiled. i immediately smiled #everything under aymeric. i can't. it's so true. #aymeric is so charming hsjfjfksk... i daresay he's still the most charming chara in ffxiv for me #everytime he shows up i really turn into a mess. he's so beautiful. the prettiest man ever. inside and out #if i say anymore i'm gna embarrass myself bcs damn. the hold this man has on me...... #yes estinien's so endearing <3 #ZENOS...... HOLY SHIT I HAVE NO WORDS #hien <3 still one of my top fave charas. his simplicity is a breathe of fresh air when my no. 1 fave needs therapy #speaking of him. it's the man himself next! emet-selch #'​you’ve got a big heart with plenty of love for this sensitive man.' yeah #'You’re not the best at showing love — you’re strict with others and even more so with yourself — but you love wholeheartedly.' #he's my favorite character thanks to his heartbreaking story #his role as our truth. he wants /us/ to remember. to know and understand. #his connection and love for the wol and the past... smth i've always related to for as long as i've lived so yeah #we're both slaves to sentiment. idk what to say abt what the article says but just. 🤕 #g'rahaaaaa he's also one of my faves but color scheme kinda turns me away n he's astria's fave. yeah #BUT SO TRUE SO TRUE SO TRUE

[cutemeat]

idk how else i can better describe where im currently at with sunny than saying s13 is my fave season, like idk i feel like that speaks for itself but also it doesnt cuz it is PERSONAL!!!

#i get her i get her!!!! #i wish i was better at sayin waht i think #ive gotten a little better at sorta getting it Out but. theres just so much i have so much i love so much i want to sayyyy #but its so hard to capture it cuz i wanna do it Well #the show has just become its own sprawling thing inside my head theres just too much kjdfgnk #s13 is where its like. fully trying to incorporate the sincerity and emotional underbelly n theres just smth abt that .. reels me in #i think i rlly have gotten so much softer jesussss #i consumed sp too much in middle school so now im so KJNFDGK sick of cynicism in that very concentrated way ineed balance #like yea sunny peaked early on but idc i still love watchin it progress.. cuz its not Trying to be peak sunny again #i dont mind that at all

[latestagebirdmask]

I keep thinking he's in my house

#my ways of making do are failing one by one #i sincerely may have let an unintelligent mamas boy rewrite the insides of my head #im not able to do it indefinitely #i will not see a dr. #nothing can fix this #and ive got to go work a shift like its normal #like his mother isnt paying for his easy sailing life and wont be indefinitely #hes never wanted #he was living in a car for fun i didnt have a choice #and i let him get close enough to impact me like this #im trying not to look at it in a darwinism way but if i can be ruined by somebody that weak and stupid what does it say about me? #if i cant outrun his memory ill blow it clean off my shoulders #hes not in my fucking house #i just know he has a key #and ill probably have the nightmare for the rest of my life #there are words i could absolutely apply to this that would make it important to a bystander or care team #but i lose so much when i admit who i let get me to this point #how did i let myself get here?