#the music scared me just in case anyone unmutes these

[strawberrymilkgeorge]

Part Eight. "If you're the imposter, you are canonically Bugsy Siegel."

warnings: swearing word count: 2k (not including pictures)

behind the screen (irl dream xf!reader) series masterlist ultimate masterlist

A/N: ahehahehoho ik sapnap didn't fly to dreams house before they moved in together but this is a fanfic and therefore what i say goes and i say he did :) hope you enjoy!!!!!!

**********

"SAPNAP!" Y/n yelled into her phone, smiling against the cool device.

"Bugsy!" he said with a laugh.

"You're with Dream?"

"Yeah, you wanna say hi?"

"No, give the phone to Patches!!"

"She literally hates me. She runs away when I see her."

Y/n laughed and heard a voice of protest in the background.

"Dream claims it's because she's shy but she literally hissed at me in my nightmares so I think we have bad blood."

Y/n giggled and balanced the phone between her shoulder and cheek. "You're still on for Among Us tonight, right?"

"Yeah, why? What's up?"

"I was just checking since you're visiting Dream apparently. I don't want to take away from your bro time or whatever."

"Oh, nah, it's good. I'm only here so we can look at places to live together and stuff. He told you I'm moving in with him soon, right?"

"Yeah! That's awesome!"

"Yeah. But, yeah, I love playing games with you! Besides, he has his stupid George plug-in to finish still so I'll be bored. So yes, of course I'm still playing, Bugsy!!!!"

"I've never made a lobby before so I'm just nervous," she said, the feeling evident in her voice.

"Don't worry, I'll make sure none of them pull that stupid prank we pull with Quackity all the time when we tell him we're leaving and pretend like he's muted. It always drags on for like half an hour."

"Okay, good. I'm literally so scared already I don't need hooligans messing with me."

"Don't worry, I got you, Bugsy."

"Thanks. Hey, can you tell Dream he sucks?"

Sapnap groaned. "I don't wanna be your messenger for your love letters to each other."

"Sapnap!" she exclaimed. "No, just... tell him he sucks."

She listened as Sapnap's voice became muffled and she heard him relay the message. A loud, "BUGSY!!" was heard in Dreams voice and she giggled.

"He's dramatically appalled. He said—you know what, no. You guys can talk to each other on your own phones. I'm not being a delivery boy."

"Boo, no fun. I'll let you go so you can hang out with Dream but I can't wait for the game!"

"Me too! See ya Bugsy, love you."

"Love you, Sap!!"

**********

**********

Y/n drummed her fingers lightly against her desk as she waited for people to join her stream. She was muted, her viewers only left with the sounds of the music she played and the image of her commissioned "starting soon!!" screen. She double-checked the Discord call she was deafened and muted in to make sure her friends were actually there before unmuting her stream and welcoming everyone.

"Chat!!" she announced happily. "Hi! Hello! Welcome one and all to my stream!" She glanced at the chat which was filled with welcomes and announcements of everyone's excitement. She thanked everyone that had donated and gifted subs before checking her surroundings, even though it wouldn't be shown on stream.

She was bundled in a hoodie, her comforter from her bed wrapped around her and trapping her in a cocoon. The lights were off except a candle on her desk and her fairy lights around her room. It was all very serene. She was ready.

A dono came through and she laughed at the question. "Why isn't Dream joining? Um, because he said no. He doesn't have time for me," she joked, recalling them teasing each other about making time for one another. "This just in: Dreamwastaken hates BugsyGames."

Moments later, a $20 dono came through from Dream saying, "not true".

"Dream!" she exclaimed with a laugh. "You can donate and stalk my stream but not play with us? Very rude. Get off my stream and go finish coding, nerd." Despite her words, she couldn't stop smiling.

"Alright, folks! Listen up, today is gonna be so fun. We got Karl, we got Quackity, we got Tubbo, Ranboo, Sapnap, George, Schlatt, Corpse, Sykkuno," she took a dramatic breath and paused, making sure she wasn't forgetting to mention anyone. "Okay? It's gonna be so fun and I'm very excited!" She glanced at chat and smiled at all the positivity.

user4: SYKKUNO AND BUGSY YES

user5: corpse!!!!!! T_T

user2: omg watch out dream, we got another faceless man he might come for ur girl

user7: omg is this the first time bugsy is playing with tubbo and ranboo???

"Yes, I'm very excited to have Corpse and Sykkuno play today! I haven't played anything with them or Schlatt yet but I have played Minecraft with Tubbo and Ranboo not too long ago. So it should be fun!! Okay, let's join the vc!!"

She typed in the text channel that she was joining before unmuting and undeafening herself. Her headphones were immediately filled with voices speaking over each other, one louder than the rest.

"—aren't, but come on, there has to be something! We aren't blind!" It was Quackity. "Well, George is colorblind but—"

"Hey!" George protested of Quackity's fit of laughter.

"I think they'd be cute," Tubbo said.

"Me too!" Sykkuno's sweet voice rang.

"Quackity!" Karl shouted, exasperated. "I promise you they aren't actually dating! Like actually!!! She's my best friend and she would tell me if something was going on!!" His voice was desperate, almost as if he felt like Quackity was doubting his friendship with whoever he was talking about. Wait, Y/n was Karl's best friend. Were they talking about...

"Yeah, that and I'm literally in his house right now," Sapnap said. "That's two people who are close with the sources who haven't heard anything. I've literally asked Dream straight up to his face and he said no. And he's a terrible liar so I would be able to tell if he and Bugsy—"

"Hi everyone!!" Y/n said quickly, snapping out of wanting to listen to the gossip when she remembered she was streaming. She was worried about how detailed everyone would go into their theories and opinions of what sounded like her and Dream dating.

Where did they get that idea? she thought.

She didn't dare look at her chat in case they picked up on what the boys were talking about, which was very likely.

Quackity and Corpse started laughing loudly at Y/n's entrance while Tubbo stammered out an awkward, "Hel-hello Bugsy!" as if he had been caught doing something wrong. Oh, Tubbo, my sweet son, you could never do anything wrong.

"What are... you guys, haha, uh... talking about?" she asked slowly, hoping they would lie if they were talking about what she thought they were.

"The weather," Sapnap lied.

"Uh, uh, uh," Corpse stammered with a small laugh at the end.

"Tax evasion!" Ranboo shouted.

"Don't let these pricks lie to you, Bugsy," Schlatt said casually, his mouth clearly full of food. Probably a corndog or quesadilla or something. She tensed at his honestly, praying he wasn't going to blurt what they actually— "They're talking about you and Dream."

"M-me and Dream?"

"Are you dating? Yes or no?" he asked bluntly.

"Wha—n-no! No, we aren't."

"TOLD YOU!" Karl and Sapnap both yelled.

"Can we just.. play?" she asked with a laugh. She usually liked chatting with everyone before they played things on other people's streams but she was certain the topic was going to stay on her and Dream and she didn't want that. Bugsy and Dream... that has a nice ring to it, she thought before shaking her head to rid it from her mind. Weird.

"I do have one question, Bugsy," Schlatt said. "Bugsy... what is that? All I can think of is Bugsy Siegel."

"Because you're the most New York New Yorker on the planet," she groaned with a small laugh. "Bugsy just sounded cute, don't compare me to a mobster."

"Then don't name yourself after one."

"Please can we play?" Y/n groaned. "I just wanna play."

"Me too!" Tubbo agreed.

"This is why you're my favorite, Tubbo."

"Yeah, let's get this shit over with," Schlatt sighed among all the agreeing to start. "If you're the imposter, you are canonically Bugsy Siegel."

**********

"TUBBO!" Y/n yelled as the defeat screen appeared. The boy laughed as he sputtered out a defense. "You and Ranboo?? My own sons?! How did you guys get away with that? I literally said from the beginning that it was Ranboo and NO ONE listened to me!!"

"Sorry, mother," Ranboo apologized before laughing.

"I don't trust women," Schaltt said.

"Schlatt, why would I target Ranboo or Tubbo if I didn't have solid evidence it was them? I'd blame someone like Sapnap if I was imposter, not my own sons."

Tubbo laughed loudly and George giggled.

"You can't be trusted, Bugsy!" Quackity yelled. "You lie every other goddamn round!"

"BECAUSE I KEEP GETTING IMPOSTER!" she defended as she raised out of her chair slightly. She had never been so angry than when playing Among Us. It was a dangerous game for her. Her covers were thrown off of her body, abandoned at her feet, and her hoodie sleeves were pushed up. Good thing she didn't use a facecam because she looked like she could murder someone right then. "I have no choice but to lie!!!"

A new game started and she relaxed at the sight of her being crewmate again. She had already been imposter three or four times and they had only played six rounds.

She headed straight for the reactor to do her first task, closing out to see Sapnap silently standing behind her.

"Ah!" she yelled, jumping slightly. "You scared me, dude. Why... why are you being so cryptic?" No answer. "Ssssssssap.....nap?" she asked softly, confused by his uncharacteristic silence.

George walked in and stopped. "Why are you guys just staring at each other?"

"I was doing my task and turned around and Sapnap was here and he hasn't said anything. Sap?"

Shuffling was heard from his mic before he started moving again. "Hey guys!" he chirped as if he hadn't been super creepy moments before. "I was AFK, Dream brought me Chick-fil-a."

"Oh," Y/n breathed. "You looked super sus for a minute there, bud."

"Nah, I just got food," he said, voice muffled by said food to confirm. "Dream! Come say hi to your girlfriend!"

Wasn't Sapnap one of the ones that literally just argued with the group that Bugsy and Dream weren't dating?

Without further explanation, Y/n could hear footsteps coming from Sapnap's mic before Dream's voice came through. "Hi, Bug. Hi, George."

Y/n laughed, glad he greeted George too. Maybe that's who Sapnap meant in the first place? Why did she assume they were talking about her? Ugh, everything was confusing when she had butterflies in her tummy at the mention of Dream's name.

"I'm his favorite girlfriend," George teased, circling around Y/n's character.

"Also his only girlfriend," she said.

"Oh also," Dream's voice appeared again. "Sapnap's imposter."

Y/n and George ran away screaming, heading straight for the emergency button.

**********

Later that night, stream over and Y/n tucked into bed, she scrolled through Twitter and laughed at a Tweet Dream had posted. It was like it was made for her. She ran through her camera roll and found her favorite memes that applied to the request.

She smiled widely and giggled at the butterflies in her stomach when moments later, she received a text from the boy himself. Looks like he wanted her number for more than just to make a cabin vacation group chat (which had yet to be made, she noted).

**********

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tags: OPEN (at the time) (if your name is in BOLD i couldnt tag you sorry!)

@hydrate-tion​​ @loraleiix​​ @tinaswagbd​​ @charsdummb​​ @smileyyuta​​ @1ghoste1​​ @cerberus-hellhound @gaysludge​​ @queestionmark​​ @carnations-red​​ @letsloveimagines​​ @the-fictionwriters-hairdo​​ @boiled-onionrings​​ @a-cryptic​​ @fee-btheweeb​​ @erwinss​​ @just-a-stan​​ @axths​​ @kayleigh2703 @furiouspockettoad​​ @sometimeseverythingsucks​​ @powerpuffyn​​ @itshaileyn​​ @millavalntyne​​ @automaticcomputerpaper​​ @nikkineeky​​ @fivedicksinatrenchcoat​​ @sprucekot​​ @jabby16​​ @mae-musicbitch​​ @hungoverhellhound​​ @dreamyteam​​ @kuroo-icedtea​​ @stuffforreferences @menacingaesthetic @sapphic-soot​​ @fangeekkk​​ @haseulreturns​​ @queenwastaken​​ @peteysgf​​ @losingvienna​​ @bi-narystars​​ @zero-nightshade​​ @erinitoburrito @sparklykeylime​​ @youhyakuya​​ @danny-devitowo​​ @clubfairy​​ @loser-keiji​​ @oi-itsemily​​​ @alm334​​​ @the-katastrophe​​​ @wreny24​​​​ @applecakeradio @unicornblood4ever @brendalopez99​​ @spacecluster​​ @justonemoreepisode​​ @strawbrinkofdeath​​ @aikochan4859​​​ @chaotic-tieflings​​​ @dreamsofficialwife​​​ @where-thesundoesntshine​​

#dream x reader #dreamwastaken x reader #dreamwastaken x you #dream x y/n #dreamwastaken x y/n #mcty x reader #mcyt x y/n #mcyt fanfiction #smau #dream smau #dreamwastaken smau #social media fic #rpf #real person fic

[inaflashimagine]

JJK Characters Using Zoom

A/N: About to start online classes aka hell so I wondered how jjk characters (from Tokyo+Kyoto schools to cursed spirits) would fare at Zoom College

TOKYO JUJUTSU HIGH

Gojo Satoru pins his video to admire himself. His background is a picture of space so he can say, “Welcome to my domain!” while chuckling as if it’s the first time telling that joke. Mutes his students to remind them who’s in charge (which means muting Megumi whenever he speaks to witness his frustration). Always 7-8 minutes late, even to his own meeting. Constantly munching on sweets despite telling his students they can’t eat during class (aka their own rooms). Oh, and he never wears pants, an unfortunate discovery the Kyoto + Tokyo faculty made during a staff meeting.

Nanami Kento is still in his suit and tie, and yes, he’s wearing pants. Arrives 5 min early to the call and leaves as soon as it’s scheduled to be over (no overtime). Everyone appreciates how straightforward he is–he unmutes, explains his point concisely, and promptly mutes again. You may think he’s drinking coffee out of his mug but nope, that’s whiskey…he has to endure Gojo’s horrible attempts at virtual pranks, after all…although if Nanami is the host of the meeting he is not afraid of muting others or even kicking them out (do I even need to say who?).

Fushiguro Megumi tried, he really did. He’d sit in his desk, turn his camera on, and actively participate in class. He’d somehow tolerate Yuji and Nobara, even after they made fun of the way his large, red headphones squish his hair. But when he realizes that he can mute his computer sound and not hear Gojo, he just…clicked and never went back. Now, his mic and camera is off because he doesn’t want anyone to see him in bed with a blanket wrapped around him like a burrito while he listens to music and reads on his tablet. Cut Megumi some slack.

Itadori Yuji, bless him, is lost. When do classes start? Why are there so many different zoom links? Doesn’t know there’s a mute button so his classmates hear him softly saying, “Huhhh, I’m confused,” when Gojo glosses over an important topic, his sensei proceeding to ignore him. But he likes using reaction emojis, his top three being 👏, 😮, and 🎉. Brings his laptop everywhere, as if listening to a podcast instead of, you know, being in class. Always seems to be cooking (“Are those meatballs?” Megumi asks quietly) but nothing compares to the embarrassing time when Yuji went to the bathroom, with both the camera and mic on…

Kugisaki Nobara looks flawless every. Single. Class. (Which start at 8am!!) She’s putting everyone to shame, especially since she’s the only one who actually wears outdoor clothing instead of pajamas or sweats. Has mastered the art of scrolling through social media on her phone while looking like she’s paying attention in class. And even if a teacher asks her a question she immediately responds with the correct answer. A zoom queen.

Zen’in Maki often cleans her weapons when on video. She’s the first to leave the meeting when she hears her teacher say, “Let’s go into breakout rooms!” Eats her fries and chicken nuggets shamelessly. (“Stop looking at me like that, hypocrite, I’m at home,” she says to Gojo, who is enjoying mochi.) The reflection on her glasses shows Maki watching a show or playing online games but people are afraid to call her out on it since her blunt retorts are still sharp through a computer screen.

Okkotsu Yuta looks so scared and it seems that he’s the least prepared for the class, despite doing all the readings. Checks that mute button every five seconds just in case. But lately his camera has been off and people are always asking, “Where the hell is Yuta?” Gege, let me know where my timid boy is.

Inumaki Toge is always on mute, but you can expect to see him nodding enthusiastically or giving a thumbs up. Instead of speaking he uses the chat, but for some reason, he still types out onigiri ingredients. His classmates have told him countless times that he should just write what he actually means but his only response to that is, “Salmon!”

Panda broke the laptop and is on a gap year.

Ieiri Shoko is the exam proctor because Yaga trusts her sharp eyes and intuition (and knows that she cheated through med school). Frankly, she doesn’t care if people cheat so if they do, she didn’t see anything. Unabashedly drinks wine and other liquor in the morning. Her background is a picture of a scalpel, no one dares to question it. Often tells Gojo to stop picking on others (Ijichi). Also not afraid of muting Satoru. Another zoom queen.

Yaga Masamichi has a ton of his cursed dolls in the background. People are too distracted by them to pay attention to what he’s saying.

Ijichi Kiyotaka is a nervous wreck. Always forgets to unmute when he needs to talk, but when he doesn’t need to talk he’s not on mute, his strange mumblings public. His glasses fog up, he can’t stop sweating, and Shoko is concerned that zoom will have a recorded video of him having a heart attack. He once presented on a case on the verge of tears because someone began annotating penises on his slides.

Kusakabe Atsuya lets everyone leave class early or cancels it altogether. Ignores students using the raise hands function because why should he help those in need?

(Honorable mention) Yoshino Junpei is trying his best, poor boy. Too quiet to talk but his backgrounds are always a film scene or an obscure but cool movie reference. He’s definitely watching films with Yuji instead of paying attention. But just let him, he deserves a little happiness :)

KYOTO JUJUTSU HIGH

Todo Aoi changes his background every day to a new picture of Takada-chan and changes his displayed name to “Takada’s Husband”. He yells into his laptop’s mic and it’s worse when he’s wearing earbuds and is shouting and breathing into its little microphone. But as soon as everyone is in breakout rooms he’s quiet. Loves to private chat Yuji about girls but doesn’t realize he’s sending messages to everyone.  

Zen’in Mai polishes her pistol on video and, with that wide smirk of hers, she looks super intimidating. But then the next minute she’s using her camera to brush her hair and do her makeup. Once tried convincing Maki to switch cameras to see if anyone would notice and Maki just whacked her in the head. Sometimes Maki is in the background and you can see (and hear) them fighting. Absolutely loves to play devil’s advocate during discussions.

Muta Kokichi (“Mechamaru”) rarely attends classes, although he occasionally likes to crash other zoom rooms and spy on what they’re doing. Has perfected the ability to look completely frozen/act as if his connection is poor when a teacher calls on him. Eventually makes a robot that automates responses whenever he receives a question.

Miwa Kasumi changes her display name to “Miwa the useless.” Does the readings, but is nervous to speak. The person you rely on to know what the homework was. Sometimes she catches herself zoning out but she prefers to continue thinking about how cool Gojo is and how much money she can make after graduation. Her private chat buddy is Muta. If she gets called on she’s a blushing mess while rambling, poor baby :(

Kamo Noritoshi is in a fancy bedroom with a bookshelf wall to remind you he’s from a rich family. The goody-two-shoes, always volunteering to speak up. Somehow successfully leads breakout rooms, even when he’s the only one with his camera on. He answers so many questions that the teacher begs others to participate, despite Kamo using the raise hands function, ready to answer.

Nishimiya Momo contributes once in a blue moon but texts nonstop in a group chat with Kasumi and Mai complaining about online classes. Her profile picture is a photo of her with a speech bubble that says, “My camera is off, but I’m still listening!” No, she is not.

Iori Utahime is tired of Gojo crashing her zoom room while she’s trying to teach. Sometimes he convinces her students to prank her mid-lecture (she was wondering why everyone suddenly turned their cameras and mics off, only for them to turn back on and it’s just Gojo smiling back at her in each screen). Utahime is so close to quitting please pray for her.

Gakuganji Yoshinobu tried looking at the tutorial Miwa sent him on how to use zoom but that would require knowing how to use YouTube. Ends up using a phone to call-in during meetings and it creates the worst echo. Gojo wants to make an old man joke but he doubts the gramps would be able to hear it.

OTHER

Mei Mei doesn’t go to zoom meetings unless it’s about her getting paid for completing a task. You want her to attend a video call, for free, in this economy??

Ino Takuma experiences so much lagging. Whenever he’s notified his “internet connection is unstable” he must inform the class, almost as if he’s blaming them for poor wifi. Wrote “What would Nanami do?” on a post-it note and stuck it to his screen for motivation. Confidently speaks up though most of the time the answer is wrong or it’s a fact everyone already knows. The last person who should volunteer to read a passage aloud but he does it anyway.

Fushiguro Toji has his mic off, camera off. His display name is just a period/dot. If no one recognizes him because he has no cursed energy he might as well be unknown on the Internet, too.

GETO’S GANG

Geto Suguru’s background changes between the forest, ocean, and beach, but the beach is his favorite. Sometimes he might change it to a meme if he’s feeling funny. He’s so chill and people actually listen to him whenever he speaks. The jokes he says in the chat are hilarious, too. +10 points to House Geto for being good at zoom/the online world, -10000 for being mass-murderers in the real world.

Mahito is so freaking annoying during calls. He’s incessantly interrupting others to spout nonsense about the body or soul. Has that smug smile when he’s about to correct someone, coupled with a high-pitched, “Well, actually...” No one wants to hear your philosophical BS at 8am, please stop.

Jogo gets heated if Mahito tells him his opinion or answer is wrong so he ends up melting his computer.

Choso has a cat on his lap he calls his brother but people don’t mind because the cat is cute. He rarely talks but people like to pin his video of him holding and petting the cat because they’re adorable.

THE KING OF CURSES

Ryomen Sukuna doesn’t know what the fuck zoom is and he doesn’t care. But he’s tired of hearing Yuji complain about it-those thoughts are literally invading his space-so, being the problem-solver that he is, Sukuna simply takes over and breaks Yuji’s laptop. Modern problems require modern solutions.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #gojo satoru #nanami kento #itadori yuji #kugisaki nobara #fushiguro megumi #geto suguru #ryomen sukuna #fushiguro toji #long post

[wantediniceland]

(( Under the cut: way too long chatzy log of @safecrxcker and Hardison in the cam boy verse. Wolfgang watches H do a cam show for the first time, and then talks about his tragic backstory and gets a hand job.  Extremely nsfw. ))

Hardison: "Okay, so for the record I *know* that I'm always the one saying how you should see me do my thing because I'm really good in videos, but if this turns out to actually be a terrible idea, I'll probably turn around and blame it on you and say it was all your idea," Hardison rambled as he set up the lights and camera how he liked them. Wolfgang was sitting behind the camera to eliminate any chance of catching him on screen at all, and Hardison was wondering if he should call the whole thing off after all.

Wolfgang: Wolfgang had made himself comfortable in an armchair, listening to Hardison as he rambled. He had been quiet most of the time, curious about how Hardison set up, all of the lighting and placement. It was pretty detailed, but that made sense, it was a production after all. “I don't have to watch.” He offered seriously. I can go out for a drink and you can make your money.”

Hardison was just about ready when Wolfgang said that with his voice full of sincerity, causing an alarming feeling of melting to happen in Hardison's chest. "I know," he said, taking a few large strides over to Wolfgang and leaning down to kiss him. "I want you here, I want you to see what I do just so you know what it is. I'm just nervous because I've never had anyone in the room with me before, I don't actually regret it."

Wolfgang: “Good. because I am very curious.” He agreed. He just wasn't going to push Hardison if he didn't want to show him. It wasn't a big deal, it was just work, but it was interesting work. It's not like he took him with to his own job... Though there was an idea. He leaned into the kiss, cupping his cheek. “If you decide you want me to go you should have a signal, I'll be quiet and leave, yah?”

Hardison: "You are too good to be true," Hardison mumbled into Wolfgang's lips. He mimed slashing across his throat, mostly as a joke, but "that's your signal for leaving, okay? And obviously you can also just leave anytime, you don't have to stay just for me." He pulled away and took his shirt and pants off, pulling on a pair of very baggy basketball shorts instead but leaving himself topless. He adjusted the shorts until they hung dangerously low on his hipbones, and grabbed a baseball cap that he flipped backwards. He gave Wolfgang the middle finger when he snorted. "Don't knock it, the 'straight jock who goes gay for pay' schtick makes the big bucks," he said, cuing his bluetooth speaker to start playing some generic bubblegum rap.

Wolfgang: “I'm curious how you'll work that into your performance.” Wolfgang commented. His eyes did widen slightly when he saw Hardison's wardrobe choice. It was definitely not what he was expecting. He'd seen a few items like it in Hardison's drawers but he'd thought maybe they were just some things he'd gotten as gifts or on a whim and never wore. “Straight jock... Are two words I would never use to describe you.” He said simply before the music started up.

Hardison put a finger to his lips to tell Wolfgang to hush, and logged on to his channel. A few eager spectators were already there, and more signed in once he turned on the camera. He said hello to a few names he recognized as loyal viewers, but in general didn't talk much. His tendency to get off track meant he might give away too much if he allowed himself to talk, so he mostly struck to a sort of script he had perfected, dancing to the music while talking about how he never did this because he was a good straight Christian boy but he really needed the money -- it was mutual suspension of disbelief, since many of them had obviously seen him before. Once the tip jar started pinging, he removed his shorts with fake reluctance, fisting his cock. "Alright, requests are open now. What do you guys want to see?"

Wolfgang: Wolfgang, of course enjoyed the view. Hardison knew how to move his body, he already knew that. He hadn't expected the pre-show acting though and he had to cover his mouth with his hands at one point, a very faint near giggle escaping when Hardison described how he'd never done this sort of thing before. It was silly but fun, he couldn't blame his watchers for enjoying it. It was all about the fantasy. That giggle was barely muffled though when he heard Hardison call himself Jonathan while he jerked his own cock. He was only human.

Hardison told his viewers he needed to go get something special and would be back in a second, and then quickly hit mute on his mic. Of course, his supplies were already in reach because he was a professional, but he needed the excuse to stomp over to Wolfgang and slap his shoulder. "Don't laugh! It'll make me break character, stop it. Jonathan Steed is a very desperate broke straight boy okay, he plays lacrosse and basketball and he has a virgin butthole," he said, not helping because he knew that would make Wolfgang laugh. He liked hearing him laugh. But okay, not helping, focus. "Don't laugh," he warned him again, trying to be threatening. He grabbed some lube and a rather large dildo, walking back into shot.

Wolfgang: As soon as Wolfgang saw him hit pause he snorted out loud. He tilted his head up to look at him as he walked over, a grin on his as he accepted the absolute abuse of Hardison's hit. “I was trying to be quiet!” He insisted, bursting into a louder laugh at Hardison's absolutely NOT helpful statement. “I' sorry, I'm sorry.” He called over to him before he hit unmute. “I hope you and your virgin butthole forgive me, Mr Steed.”

Hardison turned the music up louder just in case Wolfgang made any more noise, and put the dildo on the bed in full view of the camera. Comments started flooding in telling him to put it inside him, of course, but he kept saying no, saying it was far too big for his virgin ass and he was scared he wouldn't be able to take it. It took all of his will power not to look at Wolfgang to check his reaction. After almost ten minutes of acting reluctant for the camera, while also jerking his cock to get it hard enough to look like he was really into this, he decided he'd made enough money to give them what they really wanted to see. He flipped the cap off the lube bottle and started prepping himself on autopilot, his movements practiced and smooth but his mind almost zoning out, thinking about stuff like how many private shows he should offer next week and whether he should buy a jock strap.

Wolfgang: Wolfgang did grin a little, but he was quiet while he watched. Hardison was good at working up his crowd, and he stared shamelessly as Hardison prepped himself with a care that was was definitely practiced. He enjoyed the sight as he worked the toy inside of himself with an ease that would never have happened if Hardison was a 'virginal' as he was claiming for the show. He wanted to applaud but definitely didn't want to distract him so he kept his hands at his sides.

Hardison sat on the toy, his back to the camera so his viewers could see his the way his bubble butt bounced as he lifted and lowered himself. It helped hide the fact that he occasionally lost his erection, since the position wasn't really doing much for him and he wasn't getting off on it. It was just a simple bodily reaction to discomfort and he was a seasoned pro, nothing dramatic breathy moans couldn't cover over and with some dedicated jerking, he finally got himself hard enough again to turn around and spread his legs for the camera. "First person to tip me $100 gets to tell me how to come," he grunted, one hand pushing the base of the dildo and the other working the head of his cock.

Wolfgang: Wolfgang held back a laugh at that. He was tempted to paper airplane a hundred dollar bill and fly it over to him, just for the reaction. He didn't think Hardison would appreciate the sudden guest appearance though. It wasn't exactly hard to tell from his angle that Hardison wasn't fully into what was going on. He supposed that was show business. He made a note to himself that if he ever did watch again that he should log in on his phone and post his thoughts on his performance there. All good reviews of course, and a good tip.

Hardison paused so he could concentrate on reading the comments, much to the chagrin of his audience. "Come into your nostrils and then hawk---NO, bigdaddy242 that is disgusting and I will *not* be doing that, thank you very much. Okay here, 'jack into the camera it looks like you're coming in my mouth', that I can do. You should tip more just in case it ruins the camera though, I won't be able to do my show next week if I can't buy a new camera."

Wolfgang: Wolfgang shook his head. It had been interesting, but he was glad the show was wrapping up. He'd never been one to watch a lot of porn, though the up close and personal was definitely a different touch. He waited for Hardison's 'big finish'. That HAD to void the warranty of the camera... When Hardison had finished up any final touches and turned off the camera he stood up and clapped his hands.

Hardison laughed awkwardly, grabbing some paper towels to wipe off the camera. He'd never done this in front of someone in person before, and although having Wolfgang there had actually kind of helped him orgasm in the end, it was overall slightly embarrassing. "How was it? Was it totally weird?"

Wolfgang: “It was certainly different.” Wolfgang went over to sit on the edge of the bed. “You're good at it.” He complimented. “You big jock you.” He reached to pull Hardison's baseball cap off his head and slide it onto his own.

Hardison took the opportunity to straddle Wolfgang's lap, completely naked. "Mmm, coach says we can't have sex with our girlfriends before the big game but I'm sooooooooo pent up, what do you say we help each other out?" he purred, half joking but laying his hands on Wolfgang's crotch anyway. He just watched a sex show, he must need some relief.

Wolfgang: Wolfgang fell back on the bed, pulling Hardison with him and laughing. “Are you calling me your team mate or your girlfriend?” He smiled up at him and cupped a hand behind his head to pull him down for a kiss. “You just worked hard, yah? Don't worry about me.”

Hardison bopped the hat on Wolfgang's head. "You're wearing the cap, you're on the team," he said. He kissed Wolfgang back more lewdly than he would normally. "I just worked myself all loose and open, you shouldn't let it go to waste," he argued back.

Wolfgang: Wolfgang groaned a little at that and bit lightly at Hardison's bottom lip. “I'm not really a team player, Mr. Steed.” He laughed softly, barely getting the name out. “Do you really want to?” He asked seriously. “Id be tired after that if I were you, and I can wait.”

Hardison: "Don't *you* want to?" he countered. He wasn't exactly turned on, since being in work mode was never really actually sexy -- he was so concentrated on his sexy persona and calculating his next five moves and thinking about business that it was very removed from real sex for him. But he wanted to do something for Wolfgang, after having done something for a whole bunch of strangers he didn't even care about.

Wolfgang: “I'd like to, but only if you want it too.” Wolfgang answered, having hoped that was obvious. Just in case it wasn't... “I'm not a client... It's not sexy if you aren't enjoying it too, really enjoying it. I'm an adult, my dick doesn't fall off if I get hard and don't do anything about it.”

Hardison was frustrated by this conversation, by his inability to articulate or even really understand what he was feeling. Talking was his thing, and it felt like it was failing him now. "I want to be close to you," he said, because that much was simple enough truth. "All that was just business, but you're more than that."

Wolfgang: “You're literally pressed up against me.” Wolfgang rubbed their noses together. He agreed with part of that sentiment though. He wanted to be more than that too. They hadn't exactly put a label on what they were doing right now, but he'd enjoyed it. He'd spent a lot more time in the area then he'd planned to just to stay in Hardison's radius and he didn't plan on stepping out of it yet. “So stay right here with me.”

Hardison: As though to make a point, Hardison pressed closer, knee sliding between his legs and weight fully on him. "Even closer. All the time." His fingers started sneaking toward the fly of his jeans. "Can I?"

Wolfgang: Wolfgang groaned and was sorely tempted. He did have a slight hard on. The show hadn't been entirely his thing, but it had been Hardison naked and moaning... He shook his head. “Later, lay down with me?”

Hardison lay down readily, cuddling in. He motioned for Wolfgang to take his shirt off so they could be skin-to-skin. His hand hadn't really moved away from Wolfgang's crotch. "Can I just hold it, though? Put my hand on it?"

Wolfgang: That was going to do nothing to help his hard on... But he shrugged a little, wrapping an arm around Hardison and settling in on the bed more. “Kind of weird, but sure.”

Hardison: "I know," Hardison said, embarrassed but not enough to not do it. He popped the button on Wolfgang's jeans and slid his hand down until the heel of his palm touched Hardison's cock. "I just want to know you're here," he said, which made little sense since as Wolfgang pointed out they were literally pressed together. He tried again. "Nothing ever...I don't do this because anyone ever, you know, exploited me or whatever. I know that's the stereotype. I just started because of the money."

Wolfgang: Wolfgang grunted softly at the touch. He hadn't been lying, it was weird, not bad, just weird. So it was Hardison. “I'm glad that it didn't.” he kissed his temple. “Sometimes the jobs you're good at just find you.”

Hardison: He tried not to move his hand too much, knowing it would be uncomfortable if he wasn't planning on giving any follow through. "I learned after I started that things can get a little hinky sometimes, way more people tried to exploit me after," he admitted. He was trying to explain why Wolfgang felt different, but he couldn't quite bring himself to say it yet, it was too much. "So how did your job find you? Did your school counsellor recommend you should be a thief?"

Wolfgang: “Not exactly.” Wolfgang had his eyes closed as he relaxed. “My father was a boxman, my... family has very deep ties to many businesses in Berlin.” He explained, trusting Hardison to be smart enough to figure out what that could mean. “I knew anything I might want to be, my family would twist it into something for their benefit. So I didn't bother with another trade.” He also left Berlin as soon as he could steal his passport out of his uncle's safe. There was no leaving the family easily, or safely.

Hardison snugged in closer, worming his hand under Wolfgang's dick so he was cradling it. "Hmm, sounds dangerous. What else would you have wanted to be, if you could? And how long are you planning on staying in America?" the last question was asked casually, as though his heart didn't start pounding at the thought of certain answers.

Wolfgang: Wolfgang grunted softly and reached to rest his hand over Hardison's to keep him still. “I don't know... I never let myself think about it.” He answered, popping an eye open to look at Hardison at the second question. “I've been here for a few years now, I just move around a lot, from job to job. Staying too long in one place doesn't tend to be good for a thief.”

Hardison rubbed an itch on his nose against Wolfgang's shoulder. "Sorry," he said, for moving his hand and for asking. "If you ever have visa issues or need like a fake citizenship or something, let me know. I feel like I could probably help. Hey, what's the coolest thing you've ever stolen?"

Wolfgang: Wolfgang snorted. “I thought you just stole credit card information. What do you get up to, hm?” He kissed the top of his head. “Cool?” He repeated the word back to him. “I don't steal 'cool' things, just valueable things. Jewels, cash, drugs, information.”

Hardison: "I'm pretty handy with the computer in general," he shrugged. "I didn't go outside much between the ages of fourteen and...now." He laughed at the memory Wolfgang's face when he first heard about the broke frat jock routine. Yeah, he was very much a nerd. "So it's just all business? You never steal anything for fun? What about rare antiquities? Musical instruments? Exotic animals?"

Wolfgang: “Nerd.” He agreed then shook his head. “I like breaking into places, opening locks, cracking safes... That's the fun part for me. Things like that are interesting... but hard to move. I want things that make it worth the risk AND that I can sell after.”

Hardison: "Not a nerd, a *geek*. There's a difference. And that makes sense, but I never knew you were so sensible and practical. I bet you look real hot when you're working though, all concentrating hard and wearing all black. Do you ever wear a leather catsuit like Catherine Zeta Jones in Entrapment?" he giggled. He curled his fingers. "Can I give you a hand job now?"

Wolfgang: “Geeky nerd.” He compromised quite fairly then shrugged a little. He'd always considered himself a practical person. “I haven't seen it, but that would be awful to work in.” He trailed his fingers over Hardison's wrist and nodded quickly in agreement.

Hardison: "Don't move," he commanded. "Don't do anything back for me. That's what I want," he realized, the thought occurring to him as he said it out loud. "I want to get you off without having to have anything done to me. Is that okay?" He flicked his wrist and chuckled at Wolfgang's moan. "Would a geeky nerd be this good at this?"

Wolfgang: “More than.” Wolfgang agreed readily. That he could understand, and he could certainly appreciate as well. He smiled a little, settling back on the bed and keeping his hands to himself for now. “Hm. Would a geeky nerd be used to using his hand on a cock-...” Wolfgang let the thought hang out there even as he shivered a little at the stroke of Hardison's hand.

Hardison bit him on the shoulder for impertinence, and then left his chin there, propping his head up on Wolfgang and watching his own hand work over his cock. He pulled the foreskin down and ran his thumb around the ridge of the head.

Wolfgang: Wolfgang started to laugh, but it quickly cut off into a short moan and a soft huff. “God, like that.” He whispered, his fingers grabbing onto a fistful of the sheets as he was stroked and played with. “More, come on...”

Hardison lightened the pressure, almost but not quite pulling his hand away, as punishment for Wolfgang trying to tell him what to do. He let Wolfgang twist and curse for a moment before tightening his grip again, pumping in earnest to make up for it.

Wolfgang: “Hm-” Wolfgang hummed, smiling a little even though he was being teased, in fact likely smiling BECAUSE he was being teased. “Don't be so cruel, that's my job.” His hips jerked a little, but he forced them to still. His cock was leaking steadily in Hardison's hand and he was more than willing to admit he was getting close fast, warning Hardison since he seemed so intent on being a control freak right now.

Hardison: "I'm not cruel, you like this," Hardison said confidently. He jerked him quickly, rolling his palm over the head occasionally, spreading the fluid around. "And you're not cruel either," he said, before scooting down and putting his lips just over the very tip, sucking lightly while his hand continued to move up and down.

Wolfgang: “Just because I like it, doesn't mean it's not cruel.” He shuddered a little, his hand reaching out to grip lightly at the back of Hardison's neck. He was only human, and he needed the touch to ground himself if he was really expected not to move. “Come on...”

Hardison lifted up whenever Wolfgang bucked up, so that he always just had the head of his cock in his lips and nothing more. He knew he could probably make Wolfgang come like that if he kept it up, but he was starting to get tired himself and in the end he suddenly gave in, without warning, opening his throat and letting him sink as deep as he wanted.

Wolfgang: Wolfgang squeezed the back of Hardison's neck as he cruelly tortured him, but he didn't complain, didn't demand. Good things came to those who were patient enough to wait for them. He moaned out Hardison's name when he felt the wet drag of his tongue, the sudden hot rush of pleasure from being taken inside. He came quickly, with little finesse, definitely not worthy of the shows Hardison liked to put on, but it was just what he needed.

Hardison sat up and coughed a few times. "That was fun," he rasped, crawling up Wolfgang to give him a lingering taste of himself before rolling off the bed and grabbing some pants -- the regular joggers he wore around the house, not the basketball shorts. He bounced to the kitchen in search of food, figuring Wolfgang was probably sleepy from his orgasm now but feeling oddly energized himself.

Wolfgang: “You just take what you want from me and leave?” Wolfgang called after him after he remembered how to use words again. He stayed stretched out on the bed, feeling loose and content. “I bought some juice.” He added after hearing him rummage around. He'd noticed Hardison wasn't the best at keeping his fridge stocked with essentials. He figured after sex show he should probably hydrate with something other then soda.

Hardison wandered back into the room with a bottle of orange juice and a handful of jellybeans. "Thanks," he said, drinking some before giving it to Wolfgang. "I thought you'd be passed out." He popped five jellybeans into his mouth at once and looked for a shirt to put on.

#safecrxcker #((steal an au where Hardison is a cam boy what the hell))