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#the one good thing in the acotar series honestly
lucysstoryworld · 1 year
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Lease of Life | Azriel x Reader part 2
Hey! Thank you all so much for all the love on the first part. I am honestly blown away by the support and didn’t expect it to become so popular, so truly thank you for that. You’re all incredible.
Just a forewarning, it has been awhile since I read acotar so some things won’t be exactly like the book so forgive me :)
Series Masterlist
Warnings: Angst, violence, dark thoughts.
Drip… Drip… Drip…
Was that noise water of blood?
Where am I?
What happened?
The pounding reverberating through your skull was the only thing you were sure of at the moment. The dull, slow throbbing that threatened your already nauseated stomach even if you so much as lifted a finger. It didn’t help that the breathing of whoever was in the cold room with was so damn irritating. Silence is what you needed, craved. Just enough silence that you could exist unnoticed until the pain passed. 
Room... breathing.. 
Realisation dawned upon you, prising your eyes open with such violence that  the ache in your head threatened to render you unconscious. Inch by inch, you pushed yourself from the ground, feeling as though you were moving in slow motion. You searched around the room, trying to find the source of the breathing. Trying to find your sisters. 
Though you were met with the face of a man. Long, golden hair. Green eyes. Positively handsome. He made a troubled face look exquisite. 
“You’re awake. He will be pleased,” He seemed to say more to himself than to you. 
“Where are my sisters?” Voice crackled, throat aching for water. 
“Safe. That is all you need know, (F/n).” 
He had to be joking, “Safe? Safe... How wonderful, a bunch of men come into my home, rip us from our beds and... murder our staff. How safe of you,” Speaking, no, barking at him the way you did was sure to earn you a beating. However, the images of Dina’s snapped neck fuelled the fire raging at the core of your being. 
“Males,” He responded, eyes flicking from your own to the damp ground you were currently seated on. 
“What?” 
“You said men. Fae are not men and women. We say males and females.” You furrowed your eyebrows, staring at the... male as if he had grown a second head. 
“So from what I just said to you, all you got was that I incorrectly termed your friends. Whatever.” You seemed to trigger something in him, he curled in on himself slightly. 
The moment of vulnerability was short lived when his eyes hardened and he pushed himself to his feet, “You’re more like her than the others. You should keep that smart mouth of yours shut if you know what’s good for you,” Was all he said before he took his leave.
A slight groan and another wave of sickness had you resting your head upon the tiles. At least the cold was smoothing your headache. It lulled you into a dreamless sleep. 
* * *
When you awoke once again, it was instead to the sound of heavy footsteps nearing your cell. A cell. Your confusion from before hadn’t allowed you to fully realise your surroundings. Not that you had much to look at. Nor did you have much time to dwell on it. The headache had not passed and this time it had brought a fresh fever. A cold shiver rattled your body before you were hauled to your feet by those who entered your prison. More males. Lifting you seemed to be as easy as lifting paper to them. You were sure these were the beasts humans were taught to fear. Brutal and ruthless. When your feet began to falter, the creatures shoved you with such force that you stumbled into the ones in front of you. Your breaths became laboured, lungs weak and your heart was stuttering in your ears. From the fear or the stress on your body you weren’t sure.
Blackness began to dance in your peripheral vision when you finally stopped in front of a large wooden door. The slight tang of blood hinted at the back of your tongue, as a slow dark stream dribbled from your nose. Before you had the chance to try stump the flow, a shove had you staggering into the large room. The light sent white hot pain spearing through your eye sockets. Once again, hands plunged you forward. This time, there was no one in front to cushion your fall and you slammed onto the floor, your hands barely catching your body. 
“You bastard! What did you do to her?!” Nesta’s voice ripped through the room like ice cold water. 
Raising your head, you finally saw everything. Your sisters on a dais, kneeling before three crowned women... definitely women. Though the expressions on their faces matched that of the animals that treated you as though you were dirt beneath their feet. Front and centre on the dais was another male whom, like every other fae male and female had a face that seemed to blessed by beauty for which gods kept for themselves. His face was wickedly beautiful, cruelty incarnate. In spite of that, the cauldron in the centre of the room seemed to suck the life out of the room. 
No... it consumed it. 
You couldn’t tear your eyes from it, even as fear prickled your very soul. It was like it was daring you to look away. Taunting you. 
A loud ringing pierced through your hearing, like it was only you and the cauldron. Facing off. It eating into every fear that you possessed. 
“(F/n)!”
Feyre’s screech finally had you moving your gaze. She was surrounded by her family, her eyes screaming unbridled terror. Terror for you, Nesta and Elain. 
“You lay one traitorous hand on her, Tamlin, and I will make good on the debt owed to me for my mother and sister,” Rhysand growled. Turning your head, you saw the blonde male who greeted you in your cell. He seemed frozen in place, his hand outstretched with a scrap of cloth. You assumed it was for your nose, but you could not bring yourself to take it. Your senses were overridden, panic replacing the blood in your body. 
“Now, now. Enough with the theatrics and let us get to the purpose of today.” Everyone’s attention snapped to the man. With a wave of his hand, two men picked Elain up. Elain who was as pale as a sheet of parchment. Elain who made no acknowledgment of the situation thus far. “As promised, human queens. I will show you that immortality can and will be gained.” 
Nesta’s thrashing and screaming became violent as she fought with all her might to get to Elain. Be that as it may, her efforts were fruitless. Elain was plunged into the cauldron, seconds and eons seeming to pass simultaneously. 
A tingling danced through your fingers, an aura passing through your vision. This wasn’t right. This wasn’t happening. Elain had to be okay. She is to be married soon. With that insufferable, alpha-male Grayson that, in this moment, you wished with all your might would come in and rescue her. Save her from the hell she was plunged into. Loud, rattling breaths racked your body, the thumping to your head returning with a vengeance. You locked eyes with Feyre, trying to tell her what was about to happen with your eyes alone. Pleading with her to make you safe. 
And when that blasted cauldron was tipped, and Elain slithered out covered in a sheen of some otherworldly essence was when your eyes rolled back into your head and you dropped to the floor. 
* * * 
Nesta, Feyre and the inner circle watched in horror as convulsions jerked (F/n)’s body. Feyre thrashed and fought in attempt to get to you with Nesta following suit. “Please let me go to her! Please! She will choke!” Mania seemed to grip Nesta’s body. When she could not break free from her captor’s hands, she began to wail “Just turn her on her side at least! Please!”
Tamlin took it upon himself to hold (F/n) on her side as foam began to leak from the corner of her mouth. “I want her in next!” Hybern boomed, seemingly delighted by the situation. His eyes were focused on the newly fae Archeron sister. Elain, whom was examining her new body, still had not uttered a word. She only turned and watched as a guard ripped her sister’s still seizing body from Tamlin’s grip and approached the cauldron. 
Nesta’s crying, Feyre’s roars, all efforts fell on deaf ears as (F/n)’s body disappeared below the surface of the cauldron’s depth. 
* * *
Cold, yet warm. 
Harsh, yet gentle. 
Welcoming, yet uninviting.
All the sensations of the void were at odds with one another. 
Darkness. That was the only thing that appeared to be harmonious in this environment. You wished to stay in the peaceful void, though your body screamed at you to get out. 
What seemed like an eternity passed when light flooded your senses once more. The peace was short lived when you coughed a black liquid up onto the tiled floor. Your head shot up, eyes meeting that of Azriel’s, whom looked like he had seen a ghost. 
“What’s happening?” You all but squeaked, barely remembering anything from entering the room and now. Looking down at yourself, you felt a gentle whirring in your blood. A whirring that felt like you had been born anew. Reborn with a body that felt strong, that bared no hint of the ailments from before. 
When your lithe fingers made contact with your ear, it all made sense. 
Fae. 
“What the fuck,” You whispered to yourself. 
A strange scent flooded your nose, something that you could not explain nor had you ever smelled it before. Whatever it was, it felt wrong. 
The cauldron. 
That’s what it was, you realised when you turned to see Nesta being dragged towards its domineering opening. You wanted to move, ached to run towards her but you felt anchored to the ground with some unmovable force. 
You watched with horror as Nesta met the same fate as your own, as her hand remained above the surface, pointed at the man in charge in a silent threat. 
In a silent promise. 
The general roared, lunging towards your eldest sister. Only to have his wings shredded in the process. Screams erupted from Feyre and her family. Possibly even you, but the sounds all fused as one and you couldn’t find your own in the mix. Seeing that blood pool from his body had you emptying the contents of your stomach onto the floor. 
When the cauldron was tipped once again, Nesta’s body flowed with it. You sobbed as you pulled her towards your body, feeling an unmatched terror as she lay motionless.
“C’mon, wake up,” You mumbled, slapping her cheeks. 
Moments passed before she sputtered to consciousness. Despite the situation, relief was the only thing you could feel. Relief at her survival. Elain’s. Your own. 
“Hybern you son of a bitch!” Morrigan growled, almost animalistic. 
“What a perfect outcome! Look,” He gestured from the human queens, to you, “Look at this success. The cauldron even possessed the power to cure the shortcomings of this human girl. Rest assured, you will be immortal. Never again to be plagued by the ailments of a mortal body!” 
“You’re psychotic,” You boomed before you realised you were speaking. 
The only reply in which you received was a smile that screamed victorious. Like he was the most cunning male to have walked Prythian. Narrowing your eyes, you challenged him. You knew it was idiotic, but you dared him with your gaze to take you on. To jump into the ring with you. 
Before he had the inkling to respond, blinding white light exploded throughout the room. Frantically, you tried to find the source. Only to see that it was pulsing from Feyre. Raw power flooded your senses. Flooded from your sister into you, filling you with the purest form of love and protection. Like Feyre actively encased you with all the comfort that she hadn’t in the years since she had left. 
When it finally dimmed, she appeared different. Her eyes darted around the room, looking for something. 
“Tamlin?” Her panicked... innocent? voice whimpered. 
Someone then. 
Feyre began a tirade of almost incoherent mumbling about how she had been taken against her will and glamoured this whole time. Confusion rippled down your body, looking from your sister to Tamlin whom looked at Feyre as though she brought the sun and stars to the earth. Looking back at her family, they looked just as bewildered as you felt. It only lasted a second before Morrigan and Azriel were with you. Morrigan clasped both her hands onto you and Nesta, while Azriel lifted Elain. 
And from one moment to the next, you went from being seated on the tiled floor with Nesta to the plush carpet of place you had never been. The scent of Feyre lingered throughout the room, providing you with some comfort. It did not last for long. 
When it dawned upon you that she was not here, you shot to your feet with legs that had the consistency of jelly. You leaned upon Morrigan, and looked at Rhysand with such anger that it sent that whirring in your blood boiling. 
Whispering, for you felt that you could not keep the cap on that boiling sensation if you raised your voice so much as an octave, you said, 
“Where is she?” 
I hope you enjoyed this! Let me know if there are any mistakes! :)
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nightcourtreader · 3 months
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After my acotar re-read I am more convinced that once the series end, Lucien’s permanent residence is not in the Spring Court and it’s going to be in Day Court.
I really think he needs to get out of the SC & away from Tamlin. Lucien was always the better friend to Tamlin and Lucien needs to be somewhere where he’s truly appreciated and to me personally that doesn’t include Spring, Autumn or Night.
I hate the fact Lucien feels indebted to Tamlin because he took him in and helped him against his brothers but it was clear Lucien was deadly afraid of Tamlin and the power imbalance between the two was bad, and it became worse in acomaf when Tamlin got his full powers back. Tamlin didn’t care for Lucien’s opinion and barely, if at all, took it into consideration. Then him beating him in acosf because he’s angry at life isn’t cool. Then he also threw Lucien’s belongings out the house.
Then with both Feyre & Rhys saying how Lucien is fated to be more than what he was in spring & how Lucien’s talents were wasted in spring just makes me think once his story is told, spring is not where he’s ending up in the end and I think that’s a good thing.
I think that Tamlin and Lucien will patch up their relationship but it’s never going to be as “close” as they were before. I can see Lucien helping repair spring but even then, he stated the people there don’t like him anymore and we clearly see Tamlin doesn’t either, so it’ll be a challenge if he does decide to help. I don’t see SJM killing Tamlin despite him being down and out at the moment. I really think she’s going to have Tamlin rally back before another war comes.
We all know how Lucien is Helions son. I would love to see how he finds that out. I know a lot of people want Feyre to tell him and talk shit about her not saying anything, but that’s not Feyre’s business, and with beron being a nut at the moment, that’s going to open up a can of worms. Honestly, I think it’s LOA obligation to tell both Lucien and Helion that Lucien is his son. Not Feyre’s.
It sucks Helion doesn’t know and if he did I really could see him wanting a blood duel. Like Lucien is his literally life and blood that he’s missed out on 300+ years. I know Lucien might not want a father in his life at the moment due to beron being a pos but I just have a feeling after they get pass the emotional barrier of things, Lucien and Helion will become close and have a good relationship.
Plus knowing Lucien is the day court heir just makes sense for him to end up in day. I know that Elain is very connected to the spring court. But Elain craves sunshine and she loves to sit by the windows all the time and the day court is the sun personified. I get it spring has gardens that Elain would love but if Elain likes gardening, I think she’ll appreciate and love the gardens of spring but she would still want to create more and with spring already being filled with gardens I think she would love to build ones in day. I think her and Lucien will have a higher position in day than in spring anyway since I don’t think SJM is going to have Tamlin kick the bucket at the moment.
I’m not sure how Lucien’s future relationships with autumn will be if eris succeeds in killing Beron and putting himself on the throne, but I just don’t see them being close. Lucien wants nothing to do with Beron or Eris. No matter how Eris mentions to others that he tried to help Lucien. It’s different with them since it’s so much bad blood between them and I don’t ever really see them having a good brother relationship, I can see Lucien tolerating Eris. Eris whole focus is the autumn court and his mother anyway.
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fourteentrout · 2 months
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I honestly think that the ACOTAR series and it's characters are more complicated than fans give it credit for. Like a lot of fantasy readers in the modern age of booktok and all that shit always seem to crave a morally gray character, but when a character is actually morally gray they sort of...don't acknowledge it?
Because pretty much every single character in that series except for the obvious villains (Amarantha, king of hybern) are morally gray. Including Tamlin.
He's a really interesting case because he has these abusive behaviors, this consistent like Giving Up where he just heeds to his anger and his powers, but his entire driving force is that he doesn't want to be like his cruel, murderous father. Like, his essential action as a character is in direct conflict with his base characteristics, like isn't that so interesting??? But he's always just chalked up to the abusive anger issues ex who doesn't deserve any more chances because he already gave so many up. Like...do people know that even if a character is a Bad Guy, like a real bad guy, not your charming, suave, comedic villain bad guy, but like a guy who's fucked up and broken and mean and sad, can still be a compelling, multi-dimensional character?
And Rhysand. He's a super interesting character because though his intentions all come from the same place of like striving for peace and unity and other virtuous shit like that, he's still willing to overwrite his OWN MORALS if it means working towards getting what he wants--remember when he left a head in Tamlin's garden? I had totally forgotten about that because he never really exhibited any behavior that matched that, but if we think about it it was pointing to this facet of his character where, at least a the start of the series, he was willing to do a lot of fucked up shit for the greater good.
Which is like the definition of a morally gray character. But when comparing the two, often he's just taken as The Better One who can do no wrong and like rose above his role in society and would Never Ever treat Feyre like an object...which...he kind of did? Obviously not to the same level as Tamlin, or in the same way, but like for a lot of the beginning of ACoMaF he was pretty much Also using her as a piece in his personal war effort that he like didn't really fully inform her about for like...kind of a while.
Idk I know I'm rambling, sorry this is so long, but like I could make an entire other post about how FEYRE is ALSO super morally gray and like a lot of the point of her character is that she's like kinda fucked up and does fucked up things and has a lot of healing to do and makes mistakes even when she's still in the active process of like getting better, like the whole essence of her is that she's Not perfect, not that people don't get that, just that it's interesting that people will uphold these characters, her and Rhysand and the whole inner circle, and praise them and love them unconditionally, but when it comes to characters like Tamlin, they are deemed undeserving of a second chance because the bad shit they did was a) done to the main character(s) and b) magnified much more than the protagonists misgivings. Idk it's super early, I'm just rambling, I'm sorry
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acourtofthought · 18 days
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How would you feel if ACOTAR 5 is gwynriel instead of elucien? In one of SJM interviews she stated that after finishing acotar5 she will be working on the 1st book of a different series. So that means acotar6 will come out 2027.
Disappointed. I think there gets to be a point where an author drags out a particular storyline too long (the Blood and Ash series come to mind) and the writing suffers as a result.
Vassa was taken in ACOMAF, we found out by who in ACOWAR and that she as well as the other girls at the lake have been cursed / kidnapped by Koschei. In ACOFAS we're told her freedom will come to an end and reminded of that in ACOSF.
Spring was destroyed in ACOWAR and in ACOFAS, we're told Tamlin is severely depressed but that they'll still need Spring as an ally. SF shows it's been awhile and Tamlin isn't getting better, that they know they need a strong ally in Springs army.
Elucien's bond snapped in ACOMAF, Elain was turned fae and in ACOWAR she lost her father, stabbed a man, was rejected by Graysen, fought with her sister in SF and was rejected by Az yet we've not once been given her inner thoughts of all she's experienced. We don't even see any of the main characters trying to talk to her about any of those things.
And Lucien, the list is too long to include on all his unresolved plots.
Having Nesta's story told first made sense to me because there was never going to be Elucien progress until Nesta began letting go of her protectiveness over Elain, to accept the idea of Lucien (and technically, Nessian's bond was hinted at before Elucien's bond snapped).
Her healing arc was important to Feyre and Elain's stories too (along with herself of course) however it wasn't very plot heavy. But there was no moving forward for anyone until Nesta's anger wasn't destroying everything in Nesta's path. The series, since book 2, has been as much about the sisters relationship to one another as plot and romance and closing that out before moving into a new era makes sense to me.
But Az having his story before Elain and Lucien doesn't seem to fit especially when a Gwynriel romance would probably need at least 6 - 9 months (meaning that almost another year would go by before we even start getting resolution to the above).
I'm not sure that I see anything in his story that is necessary to lead us into the Koschei storyline.
He wasn't in Feyre's "Let's help one sister before helping the other" speech, he wasn't part of Feyre's "I want them all to be happy" speech in ACOFAS.
To me the Illyrians aren't a bigger concern to their entire world than Vallahan setting their sights on the humans or Beron trying to ally with Koschei or how an entire court is now being neglected by its High Lord.
Dragging out Vassa, Koschei, Lucien's father reveal, the Elucien bond, the girls who were kidnapped, Spring, Elain healing from her trauma while she continues to remain in a court she doesn't truly belong just so Az can have his story which doesn't fit in to any of those things does not make any sense to me and honestly, I think it sends a weird message.
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"I think Lucien will never be good enough for her"
"I'll defeat him with little effort"
"I know, I helped rescue Elain after all"
"There is a darkness to the Dread Trove that Elain should not be exposed to"
"She has no interest in him anyway"
Az (no offense) is kind of a dick at times outside of the priestesses.
He makes Mor so uneasy with his behavior that she feels like she needs to lie about what she's doing so he doesn't brood.
He is jealous and bitter towards Lucien and speaks for Elain without ever acknowledging her bravery and strength.
He gives off Tamlin vibes at times and to me that means he needs to be on a time out for a bit. Where he has to really sit and think on why his behaviors were wrong, why he tried to keep Mor and Elain small so he could be the hero, why he had such issues with a guy who is a very decent person.
Giving him a HEA after he treated them like that while Mor still remains unlucky in love, Lucien is struggling, Elain has no found family, it feels like jumping over an important lesson for Az to learn so he can become worthy of Gwyn. Not just in who he is when around her but who he is on his own.
I think Az seeing them happy and actually being happy for them is an important arc for his character.
But, in the end that's just my perception of the situation.
I don't know how SJM thinks, what her plan is, and if Elucien is not next than there's not much I can do but wait!
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allgirlsareprincesses · 9 months
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I'm so curious as to what your thoughts are on acomaf/Rhys. Personally, the reason the second book infuriated me was bc SJM completely shifted Tamlin's good traits onto Rhys, while erasing the fucked up things the latter did (like breaking Feyre's arm 😅), and thus clumsily erasing chances for interesting complex grey-morality characterizations for both characters. Also Feyre forgot about Tamlin so fast it almost made the first book seem useless lol. idk, I just liked Tamlin and feel he was done dirty with the weird lib-feminist makeover acomaf got. I did continue reading the series though. I'm not trying to make you uncomfortable speaking about this, so feel free to ignore this ask. Have a lovely day 💖
Phew! So my issues with the series are NUMEROUS and some day I will go into all the reasons I quit ACOMAF 3/4 of the way through, but for now, let me sum up my problem by comparing it to another modern phenomenon: Frozen.
Like ACOTAR, I have many specific dislikes about the Frozen series, but my main problem with it is the way it cynically uses fairy tale motifs against the audience, but then still wants to claim it is a fairy tale. Frozen's setup gives the audience absolutely zero reason to doubt or distrust Hans (other than the arrival of Kristoff). In fact, Hans and Anna have one of the best insta-love songs from the Disney collection, and it galls me TO NO END that it's a trick, a lie. And then the rest of the movie repeatedly mocks the audience for believing in fairy tale love ("You can't marry a man you just met!"), as if to say everyone who has enjoyed Disney fairy tales up to this point is a sucker. Yet then it expects us to invest in the Anna-Kristoff romance after punishing us for the Anna-Hans one. And meanwhile, Kristoff is about as interesting as stale bread (sorry not sorry, it's true. I love you Jonathan Groff, it's not your fault sweetie.).
So anyway, back to ACOTAR. Book 1 is a straightforward Search For The Lost Husband. Taken on its own, it honestly rules as an example of this Cupid & Psyche tale type. It has the hunter-huntress motif, the jealous sisters, passage into the otherworld, hidden/cursed prince, supernatural helpers, three trials in the underworld, and even resurrection from death. It's literally perfect, other than Rhys marking her and just generally being creepy.
And then the next book PUNISHES the reader for enjoying that. HAHA you fool, you sucker, you got taken in by an abuser! Actually that whole book was a f*cking waste of time and a lie, and what Feyre really needs is this dude who's secretly perfect and who has all the aesthetics of a tormented prince but none of the actual psychological damage (like, say, Tamlin had). And who pursued Feyre not because of any natural affinity but because he knew she was his predetermined MATE (ew ew ew and I repeat EW). And who dictates every f*cking plot point and then magnanimously gives Feyre the OPTION of participating and we're all supposed to cheer because he says "It's your choice" before repeatedly using her and endangering her.
And to the extent that this is another Search For The Lost Husband, why would I want the same story told again, especially when the narrative wasted my time and mocked me for investing in the last romance? I just... really resent the author using those motifs without signaling sooner that she's going to deliberately undermine them (which can be done, in fairness, but it takes more skill than SJM has displayed).
So yeah, that's my issue. It really seems to come from this faux feminism that has a lot of antipathy toward traditional fairy tales, but doesn't know how to critique them without mocking the protagonist and audience alike.
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tamlinfairchild · 3 months
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What do you think about tamlins red flags or toxic behavior in book one? I think he absolutely displays it but people react disproportionately towards him considering the other relationships in sjms books and and a lot of romantasy in general.
I've read ACOTAR only once and only reread some scenes so I honestly could be wrong but I think his red flags are the whole lying about the curse thing and the refusal to talk/communicate clearly in many occasions. If there are others please tell me?
Personally the curse thing made sense and I could sense him actually feeling guilty about it too in some scenes. So I don't think hes horrible for trying something for Prythian's sake, and he sent Feyre back so I think that absolves him from the lying. As for the communication, it was def a problem lol. One example is the ritual night when he didnt explain to Feyre and Lucien had to. I however also think that as High Lord, dude never had to explain himself much. People listen to him so he assumed telling Feyre to stay put is enough, along with feeling weird about telling Feyre that he's gonna fuck someone and please don't show up or I might want to fuck you 🤣
I personally was also annoyed at the scene the day after he bites her because he didn't apologize but reread the scene and saw he was angry it the scene, which is valid in a way coz considering the fantasy aspects of the scene, Tamlin never consented to seeing her that night at all either? But the next scene while they don't go into detail, does mention that they apologized so that's good.
Idk, this isn't a perfect book and Tamlin isn't a perfect character but I'm in way too deep to see any other red flags lol so please elaborate anon.
And yes, I do think a lot of actions by other characters are way worse that Tamlin's. Eg: Rhysand drugging Feyre for weeks every night UTM like wat even is that and getting Clare killed.. like dude Rhysand was genuinely evil in ACOTAR.
But Tamlin is the scapegoat in this series, he's anything SJM wants him to be. Once a writer decides a character's integrity doesn't matter, anything can be pinned on them. The narrative keeps pushing that he's a dick, mostly from other people's perspective, when he's not really that bad in comparison and is in dire need if therapy.
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littlefoxwithadagger · 4 months
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Zee's 2023 Reads
Stats:
Books read ˋ°•*⁀➷ 62
Books DNFed ˋ°•*⁀➷ 9
Five-star reads ˋ°•*⁀➷ 23
Note: ☆ counts as a half star, since there isn’t a half star emoji
I tried not to tag any books I didn’t like because I don’t like to hate on books in their fandom tags, so if I accidentally tagged something I have a bad review, please tell me 😭
This list is chaos and I defintely ripped into some of these books because I hated them. Be warned. (I’m sorry ACOTAR fans. Maybe don’t read this if that’s your favorite book series. I didn’t hate them, but I certainly had quite a few criticisms.)
Also, if you see the reviews start to get way longer in October, that’s because I started this post in October, so everything I read after that was reviewed immediately after reading.
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↳ March (2)
Red Queen - Victoria Aveyard
March 3rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️
I read this by request of my aunt (it's her favorite book series) and honestly it was just kinda boring and not my taste...not to mention the ending REALLY pissed me off. The whole powers thing was kinda cool, but the dystopian main plot was kind of generic? Which is fine, but this was kind of bland for a first book. Will not be finishing the series.
Glass Sword - Victoria Aveyard
March 10th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️, DNF
This is the sequel to Red Queen, and frankly I think I read about three chapters of it before I DNFed. The main reason I DNFed this was because of the ending of the first book. I won’t go into detail about it because it spoils the end of the first book, but after my favorite character was taken away from me, I couldn’t finish this series.
Overall, I think this series had great potential but bad execution. I may try to read it again in the new year just to give the entire series a proper, full review, but at the time that I read this, I wasn’t into reading much at all and therefore couldn’t read a book just to say I’d read it.
↳ May (7)
Les Misérables - Victor Hugo
May 5th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
By far my favorite classic thanks to my mom encouraging me to read it. Loads of beautiful prose and a compelling plot line. I especially liked how he wove a bunch of stories that seemed not at all connected into one. Jean Valjean was a very complicated character, and I enjoyed following his story as it progressed. It felt very full-circle, even if the ending was a bit sad. The author took us all over France, and I felt very immersed in the world even though there was no visual for it. I also appreciated seeing the side characters grow over the length of the story. There were quite a few side characters who got a full arc despite not needing it. I'll probably reread this someday, just not now.
Flip the Script - Lyla Lee
May 20th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This is a cute sapphic love story between two teenage actresses starring together in a Korean drama. Fun fact - I didn't realize it was sapphic for a good while and was confused why sexuality was a hot topic in the book. Whoops! Cute anyways, and the plotline kept me interested.
The Selection - Kiera Cass
May 26th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
This was my first reread of the year! I read this book back in 2021 originally by request of a friend. Rereading it was a bit of a let-down. I found the main girl annoying at times and overall the plot just kinda felt...meh. I will say that I was a bit disappointed that Maxon was the main guy at first because I really loved Aspen, but I think Maxon grew on me quite a bit more towards the end of this book. It was also easier for me to love him on the reread because I’d followed the full story already, so I think I appreciated his character more on this read than I did on the first read. I'm also not huge into dystopian, so that did kill my enjoyment of this a bit.
The Elite - Kiera Cass
May 27th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
To continue my Selection reread, I read this. This book was better than the first one, though some of it was just very boring if I'm remembering correctly. It was nice to have a smaller group of girls and get to see them getting to know each other better, and this alone made the book more enjoyable than the last. I think the political tension upped a bit in this book, which I didn’t really like, but it did lead to quite a few great scenes between America and Maxon.
The One - Kiera Cass
May 28th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
To complete the Selection reread, I read this. This was by far the best book in the trilogy. It was fun and full of action, and Maxon and America finally got themselves together. There was a great love confession from Maxon at the very end which will forever have my heart. Five stars just for making me swoon honestly. There were a few things that frustrated me in this book, such as the fact that America and Maxon still didn’t seem to trust each other for a lot of this book, but that’s their problem, not mine. I definitely enjoyed the scene where America saw Maxon’s scars for the first time. It was a very sweet scene, and I love emotional vulnerability between characters. 💔
Honorable mention - The Heir - Kiera Cass
May 29th, ⭐️⭐️, DNF
This book sucked to put it frankly. I recall enjoying it the first time I read it, but upon reread I found the main character entirely unbearable (making America look like a saint) and I think I made it about ten pages before deciding it wasn't worth the reread. I wish I didn't own this book.
The Love Hypothesis - Ali Hazelwood
May 29th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
This book was what really got me back into reading, and I'd been wanting to read it for months after hearing about it all over the internet. I gave it four stars at the time because I cringed a bit at the number of times the main girl referred to the main guy as "big" or something of the sort but overall found it enjoyable. Honestly, I'd probably rate this lower if I re-read it, but I'm not going to bother testing that theory. It got me back into picking up books, and that's what matters.
↳ June (9)
A Court of Thorns and Roses - Sarah J. Maas
June 10th, ⭐️⭐️☆, DNF
This book...was disappointing. This was the first book I bought from the store without reading it first because the internet had me so convinced I'd enjoy it. I didn't. I found myself so bored I didn't bother reading past page 100 before I returned the book to the store. I don't really have much to say about it other than it was boring, honestly. Feyre also annoyed me a decent bit.
The Romantics - Leah Konen
June 14th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️, DNF
This book had the same problem as ACOTAR, only far worse. This book felt like it had absolutely no substance, and I read at least half of it. The entire book was narrated by the entity of Love, and all of the characters we got introduced to were only ever surface-level. I felt like I was watching a bunch of strangers interact with each other. Perhaps it was just that young teenage romance isn’t really my cup of tea, but I found the plot entirely uninteresting.
Once Upon a Broken Heart - Stephanie Garber
June 19th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
My babyyyyyyyyyy <3 My bread and butter, the reason I got into fantasy books. Definitely not as compelling as the second book, but compelling nonetheless. Jacks and Evangeline have insane tension and it was overall just great. I absolutely loved the whole kisses deal, though I’ll admit this book was NOT what I thought it was. When I picked it up, I was expecting Jacks to be an actual prince, and I was quite surprised to find that he was more of a demigod. Either way, it was a great book, and if you love romantacy, I’d recommend this for SURELY. (I’m biased, can’t you tell? This is a OUBAH blog, after all.)
The Ballad of Never After - Stephanie Garber
June 20th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I'd give this book six stars if I could. This entire book was just pining and drama, and I live for it. Not to mention...the Hollow? Yes. Yes, yes yes. Everything about this book, yes. The curses in this book were completely crazy, and I felt like we got a lot more world building in this book. The entire world felt a lot more complete in this book, and we really got to start to piece together Jacks’s backstory. Lovely.
One True Loves - Elise Bryant
June 21st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I'm pretty sure I actually read this book last year, but it got put into my book tracker in July so I'm leaving it here. This was a cutsey little romance about a girl who goes on a cruise in Europe. I don't remember much about it, but I remember loving the two main characters and the realtionship they had with each other.
Happily Ever Afters - Elise Bryant
June 21st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Pretty sure this is the book before One True Loves? They're in the same series, I know that. This was a cutsey little book about a baker guy and a writer girl who ended up at the same high school. Absolutely loved the character growth the main character had over the course of the book.
In Order to Live - Yeonmi Park
June 26th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This was a biography written by a woman who escaped North Korea. It was truly an amazing read, and this is the one book I cried while reading this year! I would definitely recommend this to anyone because it is extremely informative while also being very immersive.
Caraval - Stephanie Garber
June 27th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Back to Stephaine Garber! Honestly, I started reading this series for Jacks, but the first book is something entirely on its own. I absolutely loved Julian and Scarlett, and I'll be rereading this again soon. The book very much immersed the reader, and I felt like I was a player in Caraval myself. There was so much fun to be had in this book, and honestly it could just be read as a stand-alone.
Legendary - Stephanie Garber
June 31st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I drove all the way to the other side of town to get this book, that's how good the first one was. This book was less enjoyable than the first, but the plot was extremely compelling. Sadly, I’m not a huge fan of Tella, so I struggled to immerse myself in this book the way I got immersed in Caraval.
↳ July (11)
(Was I ok in July? How many books is this, Zee?)
Finale - Stephanie Garber
July 1st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Jacks. That's about all I have to say about this book.
Sugar, Spice, and Can’t Play Nice - Annika Sharma
July 2nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Not sure why, but I decided to dump $16? $17? on this when I went to Barnes and Noble with a friend, so I had to finish it. There was a tad too much sexual tension and not enough romance between the main characters for my taste, but it was a good book. I especially enjoyed that the author did so much with her own culture in the book. Both of the characters learned the importance of truly connecting with someone over the course of the book, and I thought it was lovely.
The Spanish Love Deception - Elena Armas
July 2nd, ⭐️⭐️, DNF
This book was...something. I - yet again - purchased a book without reading it first. Learned my lesson this time. I have honestly no idea what this book is about because I read only fifty pages of it and there was...too much of her referring to him as "big" and "tall". I get it. He's tall and wide. Can we please discuss why you hate him? I'd love to know, really. Perhaps this book is for you if you like extreme sexualization of tall, buff men, but it’s not for me.
The Inheritance Games - Jennifer Lynn Barnes
July 6th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Queen. Puzzles and drama galore, and I love the boys. That's really all I have to say about this. I LOVE puzzles so this book was a big hit with me. Avery is a little genius and I appreciate it, and I also loved getting to see her adapt to her new life.
The Cruel Prince - Holly Black
July 9th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
This read is courtesy of my bestie. She had not finished the series when she recommended it. Still hasn't. (Nani, this is a plea for you to finish it.) I don't recall much of the book, honestly, but the plot was good enough for me to rate it four and a half stars, so...?
The Wicked King - Holly Black
July 11th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
Cardan and Jude...on the couch...with- ahem. I mean what. What was this book about? Also I love the way Cardan speaks. He’s very formally-spoken and I love that for him.
The Queen of Nothing - Holly Black
July 11th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
yESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. This entire book. The ENDING??? Insane. How do I not remember any of the plot of these books besides the end of this one? We'll never know.
Skin of the Sea - Natasha Bowen
July 14th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆, DNF
This book was probably pretty great. I personally found the introduction to the plot a bit dragging and it lost my interest because of this, but it sounded like it would eventually be a good and intriguing plot. I may eventually pick this back up, but currently there are other books I am actually excited to read, so for now this will be only a DNF.
These Violent Delights - Chloe Gong
July 17th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️, DNF
Ahem...this was actually a great book, despite the DNF and star rating. I DNFed this book because it was too gorey, but I'm currently attempting to finish it. The writing is beautiful and the characters are very compelling. The tension between the main characters is lovely. I'm hoping to give this five stars when I finally finish it.
Six of Crows - Leigh Bardugo
July 18th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Delicious. A heist, six morally grey characters, lots of fighting and tension - both romantic and plot-wise. Absolutely ate up the characters' backstories. I love a good trauamtic backstory. I was reading fanfics about this book before I even finished reading it, that's how good the character building was. (Sadly I got a ton of the plot spoiled for me between this book and the next because I decided to join the online fandom before finishing the books. I will NOT make that mistake again.)
How the King of Elfhame Learned to Hate Stories - Holly Black
July 19th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
A goofy short read about Cardan. I love him. That's it.
(Zee said no reading during birthday month apparently? Was I spending too much time being lovesick over my coworker? We'll never know.)
↳ September (6)
The Forgetting - Sharon Cameron
September 1st, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This book surprised me. I had no idea what it was about going into it, and I was entirely surprised. Apparently it's dystopian? Sci-fi? Who knew? (not me) Anyways, I loved the two main characters, and the plot was extremely creative. This is definitely going to be a re-read next year. Sadly, the sequel was not about this pair of characters, so I didn’t end up reading it.
Fourth Wing - Rebecca Yarros
September 15th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Well, this is a funny story. I put in a request at the library for this book in July, having about zero clue what it was about beyond dragons. I was intrigued, of course, because I LOVE dragons. By the time I got my hands on the book, I'd heard many reviews about how awful the book was. I was convinced I'd hate it, but of course, I had to read it because I waited TWO MONTHS for it. It took a few pages for me to be interested, but it was a VERY good book. I love Xaden. I will kiss him on the head. This got four stars because those smut scenes GAGGED me (and not in a good way), but I have since read worse smut, so perhaps this will be a five-star someday. The smut was truly something, though. I sat on the couch and sobbed from laughter while reading them.
The Stolen Heir - Holly Black
September 16th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This was...gorey, honestly. But other than that, a great read. Both main characters are very compelling, and I adore Oak. Sweetest boy. I can't wait to read the second book. It really took us a lot farther into the world of Elfhame, and I appreciated the book for that.
Lightlark - Alex Aster
September 16th, ☆, DNF
I truly wish I could just say "No." and move on with this list, but this book was probably the worst book I've ever read. I read three pages and was so extremely confused that I couldn't continue. To confuse me that awfully in the first three pages of a book is a feat, I'll give her that. I would not recommend this book to anyone, and generally I believe that everything has an audience. I'm sorry if you're a fan of this book, but I just...can't.
Fireworks - Alice Lin
September 20th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Cute book about a girl and her childhood best friend turned Kpop star when they finally reunite at age 18. Soooo much romantic tension, and I loved how the book dealt with mental health. I hope these two live happily ever after.
Reread - Fourth Wing - Rebecca Yarros
September 25th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Yes, I reread it a week after I read it. Sue me. It was a good book. I’ll be rereading it again when my holiday edition shows up.
↳ October (8)
Imogen, Obviously - Becky Albertalli
October 5th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This is going on the list of cutesy sapphic books that make me cry. Absolutely loved the way the realtionship between the two main characters developed, and I thought it did a good job about commenting on what it means to be queer. Also, arguably the best college friend group ever in this book. I'm jealous.
When You Wish Upon a Lantern - Gloria Chao
October 6th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This book was ok. It was cute, but I found it slightly boring. I will say it was very good for a first-person dual POV book, which I usually hate and refuse to read.
Assistant to the Villain - Hannah Nicole Maehrer
October 14th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
This was a funny read, because I expected to hate read it, but it had me kicking and screaming, especially the ending. I was so insanely upset when I realized it was a trilogy (mostly because the ending was absolutely jarring and I didn’t expect it to end on a cliffhanger), but at the same time I'm glad this isn't the last we'll see of these characters. I love books where the villains are villains because they felt like that was all they could be. I love. Beyond all of this, I simply enjoyed to see all the characters interact with each other, and I felt like the author did a good job of humanizing all the characters. Not to mention Kingsley. He’s arguably my favorite character despite having no real lines in the book.
The Hawthorne Legacy - Jennifer Lynn Barnes
October 15th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Puzzles, Hawthorne boys, and...strip bowling (I forgot about this scene until a coworker told me she didn't read the book because there was stripping in it. I laughed.) Anyways I loved Jameson and Avery in this book and that's about all I have to say.
The Final Gambit - Jennifer Lynn Barnes
October 18th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Ok I’m going to be completely honest this book was one huge blur and it almost felt disconnected from the rest of the series. Don’t get me wrong, it was GREAT, but it was like complete whiplash while simultaneously tying up all the loose ends we had in the last two books. Also *spoilers* but JamesonAvery endgame YAYYYYYY.
Reread - Once Upon a Broken Heart - Stephanie Garber
October 19th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I reread this in preparation for the third book and it took me a month to read. Idk man.
Reread - The Ballad of Never After - Stephanie Garber
October 23rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Good soup. Send me to the Hollow, please.
A Curse for True Love - Stephanie Garber
October 24th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
*ahem* drum roll please… 🥁🥁🥁 …LOVELY!! Evajacks kiss. This is all I wanted. Also his dimples. And Archer. And- Ok enough about that. To actually review this book, I think it was a great wrap-up of the series. The book had an amazing vibe, and I loved how the first half of the book felt shrouded in mystery since we spent the majority of the time in Evangeline’s head. I read this entire book in one five-hour sitting, completely skipping all the homework I had to do that night just so I could read this IMMEDIATELY. It was totally worth it. I also just loved seeing Jacks as the tortured man I always knew he was. Yes bby be so tortured. Now kiss.
↳ November (8)
A Court of Mist and Fury - Sarah J. Maas
November 3rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️
This was...a book. It had potential to be a great book in the first 100 pages, but somewhere along the way it got kind of insane. Honestly, I feel like it should've been two books. It was over 600 pages and yet I found most of the scenes were a bit too short. Also, there were too many location changes, and this book is where the bad smut truly is. I couldn't even read the smut scenes...I can usually tolerate them. (Is it clear I don't like smut?). The first half of the book set up this lovely dynamic between Rhys and Feyre that I loved and showed me this new, fun world of the Night Court. I only wish that I’d enjoyed the second half of the book as much as I did the first. The second half didn’t get enough development and kind of just all ran together, which sucked. I would’ve given this four stars if the second half had had better pacing.
Honorable mention - The Queen of Nothing - Holly Black
November 8th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
*cough* *cough* ahem. I reread like half this book for the scenes between Cardan and Jude…especially a specific scene in chapter 21 (if you know you know) and also the ending <3 yes queen get your ma-
Iron Flame - Rebecca Yarros
November 12th , ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
(I just finished this book right before I started typing this so excuse my screaming) BEST BOOK OF THE YEAR. HANDS DOWN. ABSOLUTELY AMAZING ENDING AND I LOVE YOU REBECCA YARROS. If you like fantasy, I’d recommend this book. (Also rep for the messed up joints girlies 🙏🏼) I love Xaden and Violet sm.
These Violent Delights - Chloe Gong
November 14th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
This book was very good. Great prose, amazing characters, original plot. I only didn’t give it five stars because I personally felt just a bit disconnected from the story. I didn’t really feel all that stressed by the plot, though this may have been because I only had four hours to read the book. Overall, it was a great book and I’ll be reading the sequel when I have time. (Also, coming off the Iron Flame high does make this book a bit less fascinating.)
Crooked Kingdom - Leigh Bardugo
November 15th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
After four months, I finally bring myself to finish this. A masterpiece. I didn’t want to leave this world, and yet I finally had to. The entire crew has my heart, and that ending broke me. I wanted so badly to simply not read it and make sure it didn’t happen, but here we are. Our gang all got their not-quite-happily-ever-after, and this may or may not have been the only book to make me cry ever. (That’s not true, but I can’t remember which other book I cried at. Perhaps it was my own.) Five stars. I will be returning to this duology someday to reabsorb the masterpiece that it is.
Drizzle, Dreams, and Lovestruck Things - Maya Prasad
November 22nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
This book was pretty good. The sisters had a cute relationship and the inn was fun. The book was split into four parts - one for each sister - and personally I enjoyed the first two the best. The third one was also pretty cute, but the last one…I didn’t connect with the character as well, and her plot seemed to drag. I actually stopped reading like 3 pages before the end because the plot was basically over like 20 pages before and it was just focusing on side characters. I think I’m just not a huge fan of slice of life in book form, so if you like that, then this book is for you. I have the sequel sitting on my shelf, but I might just take it back to the library at this point.
A Court of Wings and Ruin - Sarah J. Maas
November 23rd, ⭐️⭐️
This book was way too long, to put it bluntly. I considered DNFing it a number of times, and the plot just seemed to drag on. I don’t understand what Maas has against question marks, either. I can’t tell you how many times I read a question in here that ended with a period. I’m not sure whether it was supposed to emphasize tone or what she was trying to do, but it was extremely irritating and distracting. I didn’t notice this happening in the other two books, but maybe I just missed it. The only reason I finished this book was so that I could read ACOSF with full context because I do love Cassian and Nesta, but otherwise I probably would’ve DNFed about 2/3 of the way in. The fandom wasn’t kidding when they said ACOMAF was the best book in the series. I’m only glad I finished this because of the Nessian scene we got at the end 💔 my heart cried.
A Court of Silver Flames - Sarah J. Maas
November 25th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
To my surprise and delight, this book has question marks!!! Yayyy!!! To start this review off, I’ll begin by saying - Sarah finally got a decent review out of me. I really enjoyed this book except for a few small details. Now, that may just be because I love Cassian and Nesta, but I consider it a win that she wrote two characters that I LOVE.
That being said, this book made me dislike Rhysand even more than I already did. I’m not sure what it is about him, but I find him a bit intolerable. I won’t dwell on this point, but I found him especially irritating in relation to the Feyre B-plot. Oof. That in combination with the ridiculous number of smut scenes made me knock this down a star. I was fine with them at first, but then it just became too much. Google says there were only 7 smut scenes in the book, but I swear there were more. This is just a personal gripe and nothing against the book or its readers, but it certainly downgraded my enjoyment of it.
Beyond that, I really loved the tension between Cassian and Nesta, and I also enjoyed seeing the two of them work through their issues. They’re extremely sweet and I love them. One thing though - Sarah, why did you tease a mating ceremony for like three pages and then we don’t even get to see it??? Miss ma’am at the very least I wanted to see Cassian being all sweet as they consummated the mating or whatever. But instead we get another scene of someone crying over Feyre’s painting??? COME ON!!! This will probably be the only time I’ll rate an SJM book over 3 stars.
↳ December (11)
The Brothers Hawthorne - Jennifer Lynn Barnes
December 2nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
To start this off, I was completely thrilled to read a book about the boys. Don’t get me wrong, I love Avery, but the three youngest Hawthorne brothers have always piqued my interest more. I honestly didn’t think a book in this series could be better than the others, but there was something about this book that was even more incredible than the trilogy. This book was even better than I thought it would be. I expected to enjoy Jameson’s part of the story even more than Grayson’s part, but I actually found myself enjoying getting to know Grayson quite a bit more. (Don’t get me wrong, I loved Jameson’s part of the story, but this book made me love Gray a lot more.). I’d give this book six stars if I could. Absolutely lovely and completely compelling read, and I love all the new characters we’re introduced to. I do hope that someday we get a book about Xander and Nash, but for now, this will quench my Hawthorne thirst. I definitely have a new favorite Hawthorne though (sorry Jameson). I will kiss Gray-
The Half-Life of Love - Brianna Bourne
December 9th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️
Uh so to put it simply. I hated this book (in the best way possible). I don’t know why I read this. I knew how it would end from the start, but it intrigued me enough that I read it anyways!!?? Haha. I sobbed at the ending. I never want to think about this book again. I loved the characters but I hated the plot. That’s it. (I will also say this book dealt HEAVILY with death and was very heavy so. Yeah. Be warned.) Update after a week of processing: I actually loved this book a lot, but it broke my heart. I loved the character development that Flint went through over the course of the book, and it absolutely broke me that that was the end. I may change my star rating for this before I officially post this, but for now it stays at 3 for hurting me.
Fireborne - Rosaria Munda
December 16th, ⭐️⭐️☆, DNF
This book was…odd, to say the least. It had potential, but something about the world building felt off to me. Perhaps it’s just not my vibe. My main gripe with it has to be the characters’ names. Some of them had very modern names, some of them had very old names, and some of them only went by extremely weird nicknames. The names alone took me out of the immersion of the world, because every time I’d finally get into it, I’d read a name and go oh, yeah, this is a book. It took me about a week to decide to DNF this, but after reading so many books I genuinely enjoyed, I just couldn’t force myself to finish it.
Greymist Fair - Francesca Zappia
December 16th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
This was one of my most anticipated reads of the season. I saw the cover at the library and was like oh, yeah, that’ll be a good read. I didn’t even read the summary. Turns out, I was so right. The book kind of has similar vibes to the tales of The Brothers Grimm, but oddly I didn’t find any of this story very creepy. It was dark and a bit gory, but I thoroughly enjoyed the progression of the story. I wouldn’t say this was a five-star read, but I really enjoyed this book. It’s a collection of stories about Greymist Fair that weave together very beautifully, and I absolutely love the atmosphere this book created. Come to find out after I read it, it’s classified as a horror book? I would’ve probably said it was more paranormal fiction, but alas. This was not a horror book to me. I should know, I hate horror. Would definitely recommend this book to anyone who likes morally twisted fantasy books - especially classic fae stories. This book gave me similar vibes to those.
The Matzah Ball - Jean Meltzer
December 22nd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
This book was so much fun. I think I read it in 3.5 hours. I wasn’t sure what to expect going into this, because honestly it’s one of the four Christmas (this book wasn’t technically Christmas but based on certain themes I think you could categorize it that way) books I impulsively rented from the library, but I loved it. The main girl had a chronic illness, and as someone who struggles physically myself, I really enjoyed reading about a main character going through the mental struggles of such a thing. This book gave silly Hallmark movie vibes, but it was completely enjoyable. The main guy was extremely sweet albeit a bumbling idiot, and I actually didn’t mind the major misunderstanding trope that carried this plot. I also really enjoyed reading a book that included lots of Jewish culture. It felt like home. There were a few aspects of this book I found a bit childish for a book about two people who were nearly thirty, but I guess different people enjoy different things. It was a fun, quick read if you’re looking for something with a holiday theme.
These Hollow Vows - Lexi Ryan
December 23rd, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
I’m not really sure why, but I started reading this in October and couldn’t get into it. A couple pages in and I was HOOKED. I love me a book about Fae realms. (At least, the original Fae. ACOTAR was too far from the source material for me to enjoy it, sadly.) This book has all the mystery and wonder of the Fae lands while being extremely simple to read and understand. I LOVED the plot progression, and the plot twists were predictable in a roundabout way where you could sort of guess them, but they still surprised you. The ending made me scream in both an angry and excited way. I totally saw the ending coming, but it still pissed me off!
I can’t wait to read the next book, but sadly I must wait until I return from vacation. I would DEFINITELY recommend this if you like fae books, especially if you enjoyed The Cruel Prince. The only reason I didn’t give this book five stars is that I felt the side characters were all a bit underdeveloped. I’m not sure if this was on purpose since the book is from the main character’s point of view, but I felt like I didn’t even know the love interests well enough to actually make a good judgement of either of them. I did, according to the ending, end up pegging both of their true characters correctly, but I still felt they were underdeveloped for how much time they spent in the book.
Honorable mention - The Queen of the Tearling - Erika Johansen
December 24rd, unrated, DNF
I tried to read this book about ten different times before I had to return it to the library, but it just isn’t my cup of tea. It didn’t capture my attention in the twenty pages I read, and I don’t think I can follow the character on her journey. It’s very sad, because I truly love a learned royalty plot, but I couldn’t do it. Perhaps I will pick it up again someday, but I don’t plan on it being anytime in the near future.
Defy the Night - Brigid Kemmerer
December 25th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Ok, this one surprised me. I picked this book up at the library back in the summer, but I realized it was dual POV, and at that point I just couldn’t handle reading that, so I returned the book. I picked it up again on Christmas because my grandma bought me a kindle and I really wanted to try it, but the options at my library that were immediately available were limited. I’m so glad I gave it a second chance, because I loved it. This book had everything I love in a fantasy novel. There were so many twists I didn’t see coming, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. This book made me enjoy a wholly political plot, and I love that for it. Usually, I’m not a huge fan of political plots, but I loved the way this one developed. The romance was absolutely adorable as well, and it made me so happy I decided to give this book a second chance. As it stands, I will probably be reading the sequel tomorrow, and I am very excited, although I’m a bit upset the third book isn’t out until January! I was so happy to give another book five stars this month, because with how it was going, I didn’t think I would be.
Defend the Dawn - Brigid Kemmerer
December 26th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️☆
Hah. This book. True to my word, I finished it the day after Defy the Night. I’ll be honest, this book was slightly disappointing after how amazing the first book was, but I’ll let it slide solely because we got to know a new and amazing character. Besides that, this book did BOUNDS of character work. We got to know more and more about our main characters, and they all learned to overcome their stubbornness in this book. One thing I really loved about this book is that we got to see more about how close the brothers are. I feel like I don’t read many books where boys are very close to each other, especially not in a royalty setting, so it was refreshing to read a book where two brothers rule the throne united instead of going to war over it.
I was a bit disappointed that they spent the majority of the book on a ship, but because of the development that happened in the ship both character-wise and plot-wise, I can’t necessarily complain. For one, we got away from Allisander in this book, and I really had no character in this book more than him (yet). I’m very excited to read the last book when it comes out, though I wish I could read it right now. This series is truly worth the hype it had when I first discovered it, and I can’t wait to see where the relationships go in the next book.
The Lost Sisters - Holly Black
December 26th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Truth be told, this was a whole lot shorter than I thought it would be. It was essentially a letter from Taryn to Jude about the events of the first book. I found it to be a very interesting character study, honestly, and it showed us a bit more about Cardan too. I would recommend reading this if you’ve read The Cruel Prince series.
These Twisted Bonds - Lexi Ryan
December 29th, ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Oh my gosh this book did more than I could’ve ever imagined it would. This book gave me all the character development the first book was lacking, and the way the plot developed was insanely amazing. I absolutely love Finn, and the way he calls Abriella Princess just absolutely melts me. The world got extremely fleshed out in this book, and I really enjoyed seeing how this author put her own twist on the world of the Fae. I also, oddly, really liked how the spice was done in this book. It was there but it mostly lacked detail and description, which is how I like my spice. I want a vague idea and nothing more! 😆 Overall, I really enjoyed this book, and it will probably be my last book of the year. I think it was a great conclusion to this year’s reading, and I’m glad I ended the year on a high note.
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If you read this far, thanks for sticking around! For 2024, I will be doing monthly wrap-ups, so don’t expect another post like this…unless I decide to do a yearly wrap-up after my monthly ones are done…
If you have any recommendations to start my year off, tell me! I currently am planning on reading the Percy Jackson series, but that’s the only thing I’m really looking forward to reading
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candyspandemonium · 4 months
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Sarah J Maas and what NOT to do when you write a book
Last week, I started reading ACOTAR.
I had people telling me not to bother but honestly, I've heard so much about it (can you even escape it?) and was curious.
I gave it a go and liked it well enough.
Look, is it perfect? No. Did I have a good time? Sure.
So I moved to ACOMAF. It was my favourite in the series. Again, not perfect but it was a fun read with enough bad stuff that I could talk about it and analyze it. I'm into that.
From then on, it just became awful.
The writing? Bad.
The characters? Oh. My. God.
You build characters to destroy them. It makes no sense. You can't have a character be super nice and then make the same character do something awful and out of character because you need that character to be bad for the plot. It does NOT work like that.
Most of the characters are assholes. Or the way they are portrayed makes them into assholes.
Most of them are being punished for things that don't deserve THAT much punishment and then ones that don't deserve redemption get it anyway.
The smut? Don't get me started on it. I get that it might be nice to some people. Clearly, there IS an audience for that. But please, at least make it good?
Pregnancy trope needs to stop, I beg. Especially the kind she pulls out of nowhere.
ACOSF is THE WORSE book I've read this year, and I've read some BAD books.
To finish my thoughts, if I ever have to read the word "mate" ever again, I will scream bloody murder.
Thank you for reading, whoever does.
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saddleseatollie · 10 months
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just finished rereading fourth wing and i am experiencing so many emotions i cannot put a single one into words.
*spoilers*
liam dying somehow hurt even worse the second time around, even though i knew it was coming.
i didnt like dain from the beginning even on my first read but my hatred was so much more intense the second time around knowing he was violating her mind every single time he touched her
i dont really like comparing book series' but xaden and his shadow wielding is so azriel coded (that's honestly where i think the similarities end though)
i really really hope rhiannon gets to be in the next book and i really hope she somehow gets brought into the revolution because she's genuinely one of my favorite characters and i think violet needs her support
i'm so excited to learn more about brennan in the next book, he seems like he's gonna be such a great character and definitely is a great brother to violet and leader among aretia
a part of me hopes that violet's dad is also secretly alive but i know he's not
the brief mention in xaden's pov chapter about his mother hinting at some kind of trauma? i'm so curious about whether the "not going there" was meant to imply is she was maybe abusive? or if maybe she betrayed his father or something.
xaden is genuinely one of the best love interests ive read in a long time. like yeah he makes some mistakes (he should have been more open and honest with violet as soon as things started getting serious between them) but i love that he admits his mistake and wants to make it up to her. not to compare to ACOTAR again since so many people already do that but Rhys would never (i'm not a rhys hater but i'm just saying)
violet is seriously my favorite fmc of all time. i was worried in the beginning when she was described as being so physically frail that she would follow the "y/n so tiny and helpless" trope but when she said "i will handle my rucksack and i will handle myself" i immediately knew she wasn't gonna be like that and loved her for it.
the book being mobility aid positive and the treatment of violet's eds i thought was really good (obviously aided by the fact that rebecca yarros has the same condition) but i loved when tairn tells violet not to be ashamed of using the saddle and that having a body with different needs doesn't make her less than or less deserving of riding
tairn and andarna are the best. tairn reminds me of a grumpy but loving dad (my daddy issues were screaming whenever he told violet he was proud) and andarna reminded me of a sweet little sister. even sgaeyl reminded me of a slightly scary but not unkind aunt.
ive preordered iron flame and will now be sitting and waiting for november 7th to come.
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natasha-reads · 3 months
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Okay so I'm about 85% done with ACOMAF and I'm sorry to say my opinion of the book has deteriorated.
First, with regards to how Feysand went down - I loved the beginning. When Feyre threw a shoe at Rhys's head, I actually squealed. But as the book went on, I got less and less invested in their relationship and at this point I'm not too fussed about where it goes from here.
For one, it feels like they went straight from the banter/flirting phase to the "I love you" phase without anything in between.
Second, it seems like SJM loves reminding us at every opportunity that they're mates. Like, we get it. Enough with that. Even the whole "he waited for her for years, saw her die, saw her with another man" doesn't hit hard at all when you're seeing how Feyre keeps talking about how he's her mate every second paragraph.
I might be able to excuse this by saying that they're in their honeymoon phase, but the fact remains that it's annoying to read about. And the stuff about Rhys starts from way before. She's constantly talking about how good Rhys is, how he let's her make her own choices, blah blah. That's great and all - but don't constantly yap about it. And when I say constant, I mean it's fucking constant.
Rhys is a morally grey character - no doubt. He's done some terrible things. But I feel like Feyre and by extension SJM treat him like he has done no wrong. The only person who believes he's done wrong is Rhys himself.
Possibly another reason why Feysand doesn't feel all that powerful is because we haven't seen them do anything for each other that the other members of the Inner Circle wouldn't already do. What's special about their bond?
I also found it stupid how the Inner Circle instantly accepted Feyre as one of their own. Everything in Velaris seems too perfect - which makes it unrealistic, which in turn makes it boring. You could argue that we're talking about immortal faeries and I shouldn't look too hard for realism, but the personalities and character dynamics HAVE to be somewhat realistic. It would have been so much more interesting if Feyre had to win the Inner Circle over.
As for Rhys... well, I'm not super interested in him anymore. I think he's still pretty cool as a character, but I've lost a lot of the love I had for him.
I do plan to continue reading the series, if only to see Cassian and Azriel and Mor get some time in the spotlight. I'll also say I'm sick and tired of Feyre's POV. She has a tendency to over-describe, to over-annotate, if that makes sense. I'm hoping ACOWAR doesn't continue this trend.
One last point - in ACOTAR, the first person POV didn't feel so cumbersome. But in ACOMAF, I'm honestly desperate to leave Feyre's head. I'm sick of her.
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kmblckbk · 1 year
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Between Royals
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part 2
18+ contains smut
*contains spoilers for ACOTAR, Cresent city and Throne of glass series*
rhysand x reader / Ruhn x reader / dorian x reader
word count: 3226
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You woke up the next morning and roll over to lay closer to Rhys, but he's not there. You slowly open your eyes and see he's standing at the end of the bed, smiling at you. "get your amazing ass over here" you say jokingly. "sorry I wish i could stay and cuddle, or continue where we left of last night" he says grinning "but I promised the bird and the angel to show them Velaris from above". "and you're not taking me?!" you say, acting offended. "sorry I promised them, no ladies" he says giving you that half grin. "I'm not a lady" you say jokingly. "no you're right, after last night I know for sure that you my dear, are indeed not a lady" he says laughing before he walks over to you and kisses the top of your head. "wait, so Hunt is an actual angel?" you ask him. "I plan on finding that out and hopefully a lot more than that". "so you're taking them out for a flight to question them?" you ask, seeing what he was planning now. "like I ever do something without a reason behind it" he says smiling at you again before he walks to the door. "have a nice day, maybe do something with the girls. And you know, maybe find things out about them" he says before he disappears.
You get dressed and walk over to the Livingroom where Dorian and Ruhn are sitting, at opposite sides of one another, as far from one another as possible. "morning" you say smiling as you walk in. both eyes immediately fix on you. "morning" Ruhn says. "good morning" Dorian says. "have you seen Bryce and Aelin?" you ask them, hoping you could actually do what Rhys asked of you. "they left an hour ago, said they wanted to see the city. They weren't so happy their boyfriends are taken with the giant bat" Ruhn says. "oh okay" you were kind of disappointed, you wanted to do something today, not just sit at the house. "have you guys seen the city?" you ask them. They both say they haven't. "well I'm an excellent guide, shall I show you guys my favorite spots?" you ask them. "sure" Ruhn says. "I would love to" Dorian says. These men couldn't be any different. "well let's go then" you say, happy you could still do something today, and hopefully get some information you can tell Rhys.
"this is my favorite part, welcome to the rainbowof Velaris" you say smiling, this used to be your happy place. "i-it's really........bright" Ruhn says. "it's beautiful" Dorian says, both of the man look at the colorful houses in the street. "what are these houses?" Dorian asks. "this is the creative corner of Velaris. Here are the painters, musicians, the theaters, the museums............ the ateliers" you say the last one almost a whisper. "so are you an artist then?" Ruhn asks. "no, I love art I just..... I made clothing" you tell him. "here?" Dorian asks. You nod your head. "do you still make clothes?" you shake your head no, unable to speak right now. You're to scared your voice will crack. "are you okay?" Dorian asks, seeming to see the change in excitement. You breath in and out deeply before you answer him "just haven't been here in a long time" you tell him honestly. "you can show us something else first" Ruhn offers. It was sweet of him. "that over there looked nice too" he says pointing to the gardens. "yeah let's go there" Dorian suggests. You had no idea if it was their own trauma that made them understand but you were really thankful for it.
You showed them around the gardens. This time of year they were the most beautiful. "the people here seem happy" Ruhn says after the 10th person you came across said hi to you and you said hi back. "we try our best, we protected this city from the war. No one from the outside knows it's here" you tell them. "that's really smart" Ruhn replies. "yeah" you say staying silent for a while "I feel a lot of guilt for not protecting the people out there like that. Rhys blames himself even more" you tell them, which you don't know why you did. "hey, don't blame yourself for whatever happened, there are a lot of bad people out there and that was all their fault. None of it is on you okay" Dorian says, placing a hand on your shoulder. "thanks but it isn't that easy". "I know" Dorian says "but try to remember that okay?" "okay" you say nodding softly.
A breeze washes over the plants in the garden and you look up to see Rhys fly with Hunt and a bird, you assume must be Rowan. "he really can turn into a bird?" you ask actually surprised. "yes, he told you right?" Dorian says. "yes but I thought, more like he could summon bird wings or be like a huge bird not........a normal one" you tell him. Dorian starts laughing "I have to tell him this later. He's not a normal bird tho, he's a hawk" "yeah that's what I said normal bird" you say, making Dorian laugh even louder. "now that whe're in the topic of flying beings" you say looking to Ruhn "is Hunt really an angel?" you ask. Ruhn smiles "he once was". Your mouth falls open "he's an real angel?" you ask almost whispering. "fallen angel to be exact. He now actually works for archangels. So no longer an angel" he says matter of fact-ly, like he said something that's really common. "well" you say actually not knowing what to say. you look over at Dorian to see if he was as surprised as you, but he wasn't. yes he seemed a little surprised but not shocked like you at all. "oh I've seen weirder" he says as he sees you staring at him. "you have?" you ask him. "yup, and seeing how shocked you are about this, I'm surely not gonna tell you". "fine" you say sighing.
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"and that up there is the house of wind. That's normally where we welcome our guest but it's been moody lately" you tell them "wait the house is moody?" Ruhn asks. "yeah it kinda has a mind of its own" you tell him. "right, happy we're not staying there then" he says. Dorian is looking up at it "can we go in, the view must be amazing from up there" he asks. "oh the view is amazing, but unless you want to climb 10.000 stairs or want to be carried in by man who can fly. I'd say we can't" you tell him. "oh" he says looking a bit disappointed. "you can go a few stairs up tho, there are little window when you go up, so you can have a little preview" you tell him. his face lights up a little. "you guys coming to?" he asks. "I think I'll pass" Ruhn says. "we'll wait out here. Don't go too high, you have to go back too" you tell him. "I won't" and with that he disappears. Ruhn turns around to see the city. from here the view wasn't bad either. You look over the city you love so much, happy to still have it, untouched.
The sun is just about to set, you can already see the orange and pink color appear in the sky. "beautiful" you hear Ruhn whisper. "yeah it i-" you turn to him to see he's looking at you. and that command wasn't made towards the city but to you. you blush a little. "oh well" you say at a total loss for words right now. "you are beautiful y/n" he says now looking you in the eyes. "t-thank you" you say looking to the ground. He steps closer and lifts your chin up with the slightest touch, making it impossible to hide your blush and......well to hide yourself.
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"don't do that" he says almost whispering. "do what?" you ask him. "hide yourself" he says "you are beautiful and from what I can see and sense you've been though a lot but you haven't let it break you. that's power to me" your heart starts beating faster, but you don't step away from him. somehow you are pulled towards him, like a magnet pulling you. "I, you are really handsome" you almost whisper, to scared to admit it. You didn't even know why you told him that but a smile appears on his face, making him even more handsome. "thank you princes" he says smirking, almost like how Rhys does it. "I really wanna kiss you" he says, bringing his face closer to yours, so close that if you leaned in your lips would be touching. He let you chose if you wanted it. And cauldron did you want it. so you lean in and kiss him softly. He immediately takes control kissing you harder, his free hand landing on your hip pulling your bodies closer. 'what's happening' you hear the voice of Rhys in your mind 'your heart is racing, are you okay? Are you in danger'. You quickly pull Ruhn away. 'I'm okay' you send back to Rhys. "i-I'm sorry I shouldn't have I" you say to Ruhn. "fuck" you say stepping farther away from Ruhn really realizing what you have done. "shit, shit, shit" you say out loud. "are you okay I thought you-" Ruhn says stepping towards you. "I have a mate Ruhn. I-i......fuck. I'm sorry" you tell him. "no I'm sorry. I should leave" he says walking away. "no Ruhn wait I'm-". "I promise I won't tell him" he says. He looks shocked like he just been caught doing something he absolutely shouldn't have done. Wait did he hear Rhysand in your head too? surely he couldn't read minds tho, could he. You wanna ask him about it but he's already gone.
You get a few moments to progress what happened before Dorian walks out of the tower. " that where a lot of stairs, probably wasn't even half way. But you were right I had a great sneak peek" he says smiling. "told you" you say smiling to him. "where did Ruhn go?" "he had to go" you tell him. "ah okay, care to grab diner?" he asks you. "sure" you answer. "well tour guide, what is the best place to eat?" "oh I know a place" you say, excitedly grabbing his hand and taking him with you.
You stop at the beginning of the rainbow. letting go of Dorians hand, you didn't know you were still holding, it just felt...natural. "at second thought, maybe we should just head back and eat at home" you tell him. "what's so bad about this place? Is seems really peaceful and alive" he says. "i- uhm" you say looking to the ground. "you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. But I can tell you're freaking out about this place and sometimes talking about it helps". "i.... I used to work here" you tell him "in a shop down the road". "in your atelier?" he asks and you nod, surprised he remembered, you thought he would forget everything after you told him. "i... I haven't been there since the war. i..I'm scared i.....i actually don't really know why I'm so scared I just" you say softly. "you don't feel like you belong there anymore" Dorian says "you're scared you will realize just how much your life has changed. And even more scared it will not be for the best". You nod, surprised he could word it so well.
"c-can I show you?" you ask him, looking up at him. "if you want to" he says " it would be an honor". You hesitate for a moment, your hands shaking at the thought. Dorian grabs your hands to stop it from shaking "it's okay" he says softly, looking at you with a look full of pain, like he knew how you felt because he had felt it too. And that was actually the thing that made you put the first step forward. Putting one step after another until you stood in front of your old shop. You saw it's been a while since you've been here, the paint was peeling and the sign was almost unreadable. Dorian squeezed your hand a little, making you realize you had zoned out. You softly smile at him to thank him. then you let go of his hand and you grab the key from the top of the doorframe and put it in the lock. You laid your hand down on the handle, holding it there for a while. "I'm with you" Dorian says softly.
You open the door and set one foot inside, not looking around you but to the ground, eyes closed, breathing in and out. calming yourself down. "sweetheart you have to open your eyes to see" Dorian says. You don't know why but a rush of butterflies fills your stomach at him calling you sweetheart. Focus y/n you already made one mistake with Ruhn today, don't make it with Dorian too. You slowly open your eyes and push the light switch, lighting the room. You step further into the building walking up to a dress you made for Rhysand's mom, she never got to wear it tho, she died before she could. "you made all of this?" Dorian asks looking around the shop. "y-yes" you say softly, trying not to get to emotional. "it's amazing, I have a lot of people making me stuff in Adarlan but this...this is amazing, I've never seen anything like it" he says, sounding like he really means it. You feel him walk up to you, looking at the same dress as you. "that is beautiful, surely some woman must have worn that, not just anyone can pull that off" he says staring at it. It was a silver gown but it was a one of a kind material, it looked like a million stars where erupting from it. "Rhys' mother should have worn it" you tell him. "I assume by that you mean she died before she could" he guesses. You nod "I'm sorry" he says softly. "she helped me alot in the shop, she was a seamstress too. her husband did't like it though, when she would help me. thought she was too good to do peasant work". "this isn't  peasant work at all. this is art" dorian says.
Then your eyes catch a dress in the back, a white gown you were working on the last time you were here. Tears well in your eyes as you see the unfinished wedding dress. You walk towards it and touch it before you burst out crying. You feel you are being pulled into a hard chest and you just hold onto him. Dorian softly strokes your hair, holding you tightly as you cry, not saying anything. You stay there in his arms for a few minutes, until you realize how weird this is, you just met this man. You pull away, looking up at him, but you can't find the words. "are you okay?" he asks sounding worried. "t-that was supposed to be my best friends dress, she was gonna get married but then......but then the war happened and she........she died" you whisper as some tears escape your eyes. Dorian wipes the tears away with is thumb. "I'm sorry y/n" he whispers.
Your eyes fall on the scar on his neck again. The pain that must be behind that, not only physical but emotional too. You can't help it as your finger reach up and touch the scar softly. You hear his breath hitch as he realizes what you're focused on. "what happened?" you ask him softly, realizing you had no right to ask. "a lot of bad shit" he says softly. "I'm sorry Dorian" you whisper to him as you see a tear slip his eyes. You place your hand on his cheek and wipe it away "I'm sorry" you whisper again. "it's okay..............we survived" he whispers softly, like it still hurt to think about that every day. "we survived" you whisper back, with the same pain behind your eyes.
You have no idea how long you were standing there for, you were too lost in his eyes to notice the time. Your hand slowly slid down from his cheek back to his neck, where you softly bush over the scar. "you are beautiful" you whisper to him. "you are too" he whispers back, stroking your cheek. For the first time in a while you fully relax and lean into his touch. You wanted more. As if he could sense it he leans in closer to, he first placed a soft kiss on your forehead, then on your nose. He hesitated a moment, seeing if you would pull back, but you don't. he places a soft kiss on your lips, brushing it so softly. "kiss me" you whisper against his lips. "are you sure?" he whispers back, seeming hesitant. "yes" you almost inaudibly whisper back. His lips touch yours again, again softly, like he had all the time in the world. Your hands slide up into his hair pulling him closer to you, deepening the kiss. Then the kiss turns more heated, pulling you closer to him. he pushes you a little backwards until your back is pushed against the wall. "hmm" you moan as his tongue slips into your mouth. You feel him press his leg between your thighs, angling it so it presses against your most sensitive part. "fuck" you moan against his lips and you swear you feel him smile. You softly begin grinding against his leg. "fuck sweetheart" he whispers "you're gonna be the death of me". you grind up against his leg, wanting more.
But then you hear Rhys in your mind 'where are you?'. shit. You stop kissing Dorian and softly put your hands on his chest to stop him. "are you okay?" he asks. "yes, i- I am" you tell him. "we uhm, we should go back". "yeah we should" he says sounding a bit disappointed. "Dorian I uhm..... don't-" you say not getting out of your words. How could you have done this, what's with you today, kissing 2 men that aren't your mate. "don't worry I won't tell anyone" he says seeing you panic a little. "thank you" you whisper to him.
part 3
masterlist
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bookofmirth · 3 months
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Lele, I have a rambling though
We always have discussions about possibilities for SJM future books (especially acotar 5) and I always read interpretations that are done so very tastefully and with a lot of knowledge on text interpretation, book context and narratives
but the thing is… ppl always treat SJM as this super hiper mastermind and after HOFAS and how messy and not good it was (honestly it was terrible) … I’m a little afraid about acotar 5 and sjm choosing to go with the easiest way (which, for me, would be choosing Elriel - since with Gwyn she would have to treat her trauma her carefully and be more cautions on her narrative) and I don’t know if I see her doing it 😓
(Also… I would like to say as my last though of someone who is following her since 2018 - that SJM loves to write about powerful woman and the friendships between them and their bonds but to let the fandom be where it is today… young impressionable girls treating each other with such hostility and disrespect… I know she probably can’t say anything bc of contracts but man is a hard pillow to swallow that she “let” the fandom be where it is today… which is a horrible place.)
Anon, have some rambling thoughts of mine!!! hehehe
A big difference between acotar and hofas is how thoughtfully she generally treats the acotar characters. I've been thinking a lot about this the past few days and the main thing I dislike about hofas is how the plot and world building absolutely take over everything to the detriment of the characters. I cannot understate how much I dislike Bryce, and I've always pinpointed her lack of consistent values as the core reason why. hofas really, really emphasized that writing flaw. Not character flaw, but writing flaw.
People acting like sjm is some mastermind drives me crazy when we can see all the plot holes and inconsistencies and retcons. One of these days, someone should make a list of them. Anyway, she mentioned rereading the acotar series sometime last year, and I would bet you good money that she did so in order to see what she can use. She has said explicitly that she isn't great at world building and she has also said that she didn't plan the crossover until she was writing hosab. That means any connection we see between hofas and, for instance, acomaf, is a result of her going backwards to see what she can use. Not the other way around. She "planned" in the sense that she wrote really vague stuff in the first place so that she could use it how she wanted to later on. That has become really apparent to me with the crossover.
Like... for example, Mor's power is "truth". Vague as fuck, right? I would bet good money (again haha like I'm rich) that sjm didn't even know what that meant in acomaf other than "I need a reason for the mortal queens to trust Mor". And then she'll figure out the mechanics and technicalities later and the fandom will call her brilliant for it. *facepalm*
I don't see e*riel being easy at all. But that's all I will say about that hehe.
Gwyn's story aligns perfectly with what sjm has already been doing in acotar, with Rhys and Lucien, and to an extent Nesta. I don't have any concerns there because I think her strength is in her characterization. (CC is just... another beast.) There was an interview she did a while back where she talked about the movie Promising Young Woman and it really emphasized to me that sjm's particular brand of feminism revolves around gender and sex. This isn't a critique, just a statement of what I've observed. My point is that she is very aware of rape culture and has strong feelings about it and gives characters the space to heal on page, and so that's not really a concern of mine, especially in acotar.
To your final point, I got SO frustrated the other day in the group chat, @sabrinasam said it was the most frustrated she's ever seen me haha. I'm so tired of sjm and the publisher being coy about this!!!! But mostly, I am so, so sick of people in this fandom treating each other like shit just because they don't agree on ships. Like it's one thing to have notps and brotps and to be annoyed by or even hate certain characters. It's a completely different thing when people feel totally comfortable going out in public and treating other actual, real, human people like absolute garbage because of those feelings.
Azriel is never gonna lick your fucking home entertainment center!!! Get the fuck over it!!!!!!!!!
I don't think that sjm is at fault for this because I think that people are responsible for their own actions. I also fully believe that the people taking screenshots and mocking them publicly (of people who probably have them blocked anyway, fucking stalkers) or just outright attacking people on different platforms would be doing that exact same thing whether it was about sjm or not. Like you could just stick them in another fandom, and these people would act the same deplorable way.
Anyway. I'm fucking tired. I'm still excited for acotar5 and will continue that series and when I was doing a lil voice chat with my friends for hours last weekend it revived my enjoyment of acotar and ToG. The fandom just makes it a lot of work, trying to have fun.
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nightcourtreader · 3 months
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Can we stop saying that the acosf bonus chapters centers around Elain when that is not the case what so ever.
It’s Azriel’s bonus chapter. SJM refer to it as such. I have seen an Elriel refer to it as “Elain’s bonus chapter” and that’s just fucking crazy. Yes Elain did feature in the first half of Azriel’s bonus, but elain wasn’t the only character besides Azriel in this bonus chapter.
A lot of people like to disregard the second half of Azriel’s bonus. Gwyn also featured in the bonus, can we start calling it Gwyn’s bonus chapter then and start stating that Gwyn was the center of it? Especially since SJM used the same sentences for mates in the acotar series & CC series in the bonus chapter in regards to Gwyn and Azriel?
That bonus chapter was written specifically for Azriel. To me, it was obvious a set up for AZRIEL’S love interest. SJM specifically brought attention to Azriel’s bonus chapter in a live and said she left bread crumbs through out it. It has some significance, the author wouldn’t want to put emphasis on it otherwise.
The connotation between Azriel and Elain was so negative in the bonus chapter, it was obvious that the bonus chapter showed how unsuited the two would be with each other. Then you get to the bonus chapter with Azriel and Gwyn and it’s so much more positive. The first half of the bonus was obviously not meant to be in a good light, not in terms for Elain’s character but in terms for a relationship between Elriel.
The bonus also showed us AZRIEL’s mental state. It just gave more insight of him. That’s the whole point of the bonus.
So no, Azriel’s bonus chapter is not centered around any other person besides Azriel himself. We got the insight to be in his head & his thoughts. No one else’s. If SJM would have given Elain a bonus chapter and Azriel would have been in it, no one would have said that that chapter centered around Azriel and start labeling it “Azriel’s bonus chapter”. It would’ve been just hers.
In feysands bonus chapter did they speak about Elain? Absolutely. Yes, Rhys said let’s focus on one sister before we deal with the other. But they also spoke about BOTH Elain AND nesta. Which only took up like 3 pages of a 9 page bonus chapter. The rest of that bonus chapter, feysand talked about the pregnancy, Feyre talking about nightmares and paintings, Nyx, Rhysands last name. Majority of that bonus was about feysand. It was not centered around Elain. It was centered around feysand.
Yes, both bonuses mentions elain and features her in it. But no, acosf bonus chapters are not centered around her. If SJM would have gave Elain a bonus chapter then yes, that bonus would have been centered around her since it would be coming from her pov, but she didn’t get one.
And acosf is not centered around Elain either. I saw claims of that as well. A lot of people, myself included, thought that Elain was going to be seen more since her and nesta were suppose to have such a close relationship in the beginning of the series, but once you read acosf you can see that’s not the case.
Half the time Elain was in acosf, honestly it was nesta insulting her. Calling her a dog, loyal to whoever fed her. Saying she finally grew claws and becoming interesting. That Elain was nothing but a doll to dress up. Saying Elain was always oblivious to things. Nesta and Cassian both saying how the black gown in the CON was such an ill suited thing for Elain to wear. Elain being cut down about helping to scry even if she stated she wanted to and then Azriel not saying it to her face. But nesta made it clear that she didn’t Elain doing it to her face. Then Cassian thinking Elain lied about tending to the gardens in the early portion of acosf.
I just don’t think Elain really contribute much to the plots in acosf, because she wasn’t really there on most plot points and I think SJM made it clear Elain wasn’t right for the night court. It can be very intentional on sjm’s part that Elain is less in acosf because of that. I might be wrong about saying it and it has been a while since I read acosf. But to me the major plot points for acosf were of course nesta’s personal healing journey, the valkryies, the dread trove, Briallyn/the blood rite/the illryians, Cassian becoming a courtier, other worlds/daglan, nesta’s death magic and death weapons, feysands pregnancy, the deal with eris. And majority of those plots, Elain wasn’t really a part of them.
I think it was intentional SJM didn’t but Elain more in the limelight of course. Since it’s nesta’s book and all, but I just think that Elain isn’t in acosf as much as some people make it out to be. Because honestly, based off what we got in acosf and without the bonus, and with SJM said it was obvious who the next book is about. I would still think it’s Azriel. It’s my opinion, I could be wrong 🤷🏽‍♀️. You may think differently. But it’s not a lie when people state that Azriel was in acosf more than Elain was.
Elain lives in the river house with feysand. If it was in feysands pov of course we would have gotten more Elain. But nesta, Cassian, and Azriel all live in the house of wind. A place were they all train & where nesta goes into the library to work. You can see why Elain was featured less in acosf since nesta, Cassian and Azriel weren’t really around her much.
And now, nesta is more close to Cassian, Azriel, Emerie and Gwyn than she is to Elain so Cassian, Azriel, Emerie and Gwyn were the ones who showed up the most in acosf besides nesta, cassian and feysand.
To me, there was a clear divide between Elain and the IC. Yes acosf makes it clear that Elain is not fit for the night court but I just don’t see it as a major plot point for acosf, more like it’s a major plot point for Elain’s book whenever we get it. 🤷🏽‍♀️
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artists-ally · 3 months
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I had a very lovely anon ask me some questions recently and I’m gonna answer them for ya babes!
1. How long have you been writing?
Oh lord that is a great question. I actually first started writing in like the 7th grade I think? My best friend at the time had introduced me to fan fiction and it was downhill ever since. I used to HAND. WRITE. things in a notebook about this one guy I had a crush on it was FOUL. So I’ve got a good 7 years of practice going for me
2. Are you planning on making this a profession or just for fun?
My absolute DREAM GOAL in life is to be an author. I have several series ideas planned out but I’m 19 years old and I just have no idea where or how to start. I would love to be able to write all day every day and want nothing more in life than to be the next fantasy author.
3. Who or which character do you prefer to write more for?
Azriel. My sweet, lovely Illyrian baby Azriel form ACOTAR. I love how much depth his character has and we hardly know anything about him. I cannot wait to know more. I also have gained in interest in Lucien thanks to @thelov3lybookworm for getting me hooked on him. And we cannot forget Xaden Riorson. But Az is by far my favorite.
4. What do you do when you’re out of ideas?
I listen to music. I find it very helpful to listen to songs that have some sort of story or underlying meaning to try to spark an idea. That or I just stare off into the distance and wait for it to come. One of those two will eventually work 😭😭 (if anyone needs any good song writing playlists they’re on my masterlist)
5. Lastly, will you please give advice for the young readers out there?
Honestly, write whatever the hell you want. No matter who it’s about, what it is, just fucking do it. It doesn’t matter if it makes sense to the rest of the world it makes sense to you. Don’t feel pressured to write things you have no interest in writing. If you don’t love a character, don’t write for them!! If you’re feeling angsty, write angst. If you want the most jaw dropping, soul twisting adventure, WRITE. IT. Write everything and everything that comes to mind. I have a note in my phone that has three separate sections: Characters, Titles, and Ideas. That is the first place my initial thoughts and ideas for stories go. Or if I think of a random character name, it goes there as well. Find something that works for you is most important. To be a solid writer you don’t need to write 1,000 new words a day. Sometimes progress is just reading what you already have and developing thoughts for where you want the story to go. If it’s not working, come back to it another day, go write something else.
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bloomingdarkgarden · 11 months
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Howdy! I simply adore your story and I was hoping to ask a few questions!
1. Do you have a fun fancast for Elain and Azriel and if so, who?
2. Where did your mind come up with this beautiful story?
3. Did know you deserve everything the world has to offer?
I also want to share with you that my favorite part of the most recent chapter was probably Azriel carving the little sculpture with truth teller. I know Elain was close with her father and he used to carve things during their time in the cabin. I’m not sure if you’ve done it intentionally but it’s such a sweet node to her father and I love it. I know papa Archeron failed them but I also know being a parent isn’t easy. He’s one of the most human characters SJM has ever written (along side Elain and Nesta). The fact that a hobby that Az openly partakes in also woodcarving is sweet.
Thank you for sharing
Anon, I love these questions and thank you for asking them!
1. My headcannons for these two may be slightly divergent from the series. In my mind Elain leans towards brunette with strong brows not unlike bridget satterlee but with big wavy hair. She's around 5'7, with fuller hips/thighs and smaller bust than her sisters. Her hands are nearly as scarred as Az's from years of gardening.
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Azriel has straight up curls in my mind for whatever reason. Xavier Serrano is a close one for me. As I've mentioned I see him more lean muscle than bulk, and he's lighter on his feet than either of his brothers. He also has much fuller lips in my mind. He fights with more finesse and less raw strength, prefers two handed weaponry- a dagger and shortsword to a longsword. I would love for the actors playing the bat boys in the series to be Israeli honestly, I think they are the most beautiful men in the world. But the show stresses me out so I'm choosing to believe it's not happening.
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2. This story came to me as I was re-reading acotar for the first time since 2020 and began to develop very specific headcanons about Elain having earth magic tied to her Sight and solid lore connecting the two. I also wanted her to be trained by a female instead of another dude and not as a warrior, hence the Oracle. I'm not a huge fanfiction reader (admittedly pretty damn particular about them) so mostly I just decided to write my own story to satisfy the itch I couldn't find. I have always loved Elain. I think she's very understated in the series, but we have a lot in common. I too am a verdant loving softspoken femme with quiet strength. I love writing Elain and Az because not unlike them, I think a lot more than I speak, and there's a world underneath people are unaware of. My relationships are also constantly laced with unspoken, quiet delicacies. It is probably why so much of this story leans on internal monologue. SO much of the italics are things I have literally thought in my own relationships and never spoken aloud.
Another inevitable battle lost.
3. I don't deserve anything but these sorts of asks just make my whole week and are so fun. Good catch on Azriel's carving! There is definitely a parallel there between Az and her father that will be revealed next chapter. He always has a knife on him, so wood carving seemed like a natural hobby for soft shadowboi. I love each of you for even reading this damn thing. As a new writer the whole process is rather frightening I never imagined anyone would even really see it. XOXO.
Ch.24 tomorrow.
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megnificent-reads · 3 months
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A Court of Wings and Ruin - Christ alive/5 ☆
Warning - this review is 1.2k words, and 98% negative. If you love SJM and the ACOTAR series, love that for you /gen. However, for your own mental health, I genuinely would not recommend you read this. For everyone else, and those who hate-read, Let's begin!
~~~
Okay, so I actually rated this 2 stars on Goodreads because I didn’t hate it the whole time but, I’m mad about it so it gets a special rating. ♡
I honestly lament when I was excited to read this book. Being what I refer to as a Lucien Lover (nuanced), I enjoyed a good bit of the beginning of this book. That’s not to say I wholeheartedly enjoyed every word of the first 100 pages of this book. 
So we start with Feyre in the throes of rage, becoming a master manipulator. Now, before I put just a minute or two of thought into it, I loved it. I love a girl tearing shit apart and using intellegence as a form of strength. However… 
Anybody think she was doing a little too much…?
Like, okay, Tamlin fucked up. Big time. I will admit justice is needed! Love when women take back power! But not only dismantling his entire country but turning everyone against him for things that he actually did not do? Crazy! He sucks! But people still live in that country. We still need order! His life is ruined now and I don’t necessarily think all that was necessary. 
Tamlin sidebar: “my father and my father’s father did the Tithe, so I’m going to do it.” Didn’t you acknowledge two books ago that your father sucks absolute ass? What fucking sense does that make? How in the first book was he the Perfect Moral Man that now can’t see the very evident immorality in the shit you’re doing. Anywhoozers. 
So, Feyre has her cool girl moments and returns to the Night Court. In book one, I was bored out of my mind until we arrived in Rhys-land. (Good one). This time, it was like the moment we arrived here the magic was lost. I was no longer excited to read. And honestly, I think the big issue was actually our beloved bat-boy, Rhysand.
I don’t know her personally, so this is not an attack on her character, but I’m starting to feel like SJM writes Rhysand based off of her fantasy version of what a man is like. Dominating, but soft and loving. Perfectly moral. Capable of evil, deplorable things, but too loving of people and their dreams to be that way. I’m going to be referring to it as PMS (Perfect Man Syndrome). 
Many of her men (sorry, males) are unfortunate PMS victims, but Rhysand is by far the worst. I wish I had underlined it when I was reading so I could cite it, but there’s just something about his actions. He is PMSing so hard that he doesn’t develop at all. He was old enough to be grown during the faerie-UK version of the Amercian Civil War where of course he was anti-slavery the entire time despite being raised by people who appeared to be violent racists. Good for our educated king. He also, of course, runs a sanctuary for abused women. 
Of course, I’m not saying that being anti-slavery and supporting abused women is bad. I love it. But like… be real with me here. I know that this is fictional. It’s not real. We can be happy here. But can I have some dimension, please? This man is the personality version of Flat Stanley. We had two conflicts between them since they got together and both were resolved by Rhys nearly getting on his knees and saying everything is his fault and he’s so sorry. The first conflict was just her thinking she stepped out of her Womenly Line and him not even knowing there was an issue. 
He’s just so. Fucking. Boring. 
Moving on. ♡.
Let’s talk about what makes me so goddamn angry about this book. I’ve seen complaints about SJM where other people are saying that other people call her books feminist literature. I personally have never heard anybody say that, but if I did, I don’t know if I would be able to control the rant that would ensue.  
I’m willing to have a civilized conversation, but I don’t remember Feyre actually doing anything. Yes, SJM puts her women in positions of power. Do they use said power? Maybe once or twice. 
Amren is an ex-god with powers above any character we’ve met so far. We see it used I think once. The rest of the time is spent talking about her power and her holding down the fort at Velaris while everyone else is off to war. 
Morrigan - also very powerful (described only). I remember her power being “truth” and never elaborating on that. She is a known soldier, that doesn’t fight. 
During the two huge battles, Feyre, Nesta, and Morrigan are on the ground while Rhys, Cassian, and Azriel are in the air fighting. After the first battle, Feyre is seen tending to her beloved mate’s wounds, Nesta is fetching water for Cassian, and Morrigan is getting mad at Nesta for wanting to fuck Cassian. So strong of all of them. 
Azriel is there doing… nothing. Which he has a habit of doing. Speaking of habits, SJM will create characters that I like because I’m excited to see how they will grow and develop. 
She then proceeds to do nothing with them.
I know more books are coming, as they will with SJM until the end of time, but it’s starting to drag. I love Elain. Well, I love what Elain could be. She’s a seemingly fragile, docile character. With her Seer powers, I was excited to see her notice the world around her sucks and develop into somone capable of holding their own. Instead, she uses her powers to relay some cryptic messages that no one heeds or even tries to, then she “snaps out of it” and can’t really do anything else. 
Azriel has a tragic backstory and seemingly a big story to tell. God, I wish I could ever fucking hear it. 
This is getting exceptionally long, but I remembered I had a list of things I wanted from ACOWAR and didn’t receive, so I’ll pick one more thing off. 
The Ouroboros. Out of all symbols, the Ouroboros is my favorite. Cycles and inevitability and all that. We spend a good chunk of this book leading up to Feyre retrieving this. It drives everyone mad. Only the strongest can look in it and survive. I was so excited to see what she saw! What the battle with herself would be like! How does she overcome it?
I guess we’ll never know.
She ended up seeing… herself? I guess she wasn’t previously aware of her flaws and then simply accepted them. Would love to have seen it!
And to finally end this review, I think the Ouroboros is a good symbol of every issue I have with this book. There’s so much build up and excitement that ultimately leads nearly no explanation. It’s like there’s ideas and concepts but then no idea how to execute them.
I won’t be reading ACOFAS or ACOSF or anything else. I already didn’t want to, then I found out about the pregnancy thing and. Yeah. I think I’m good off that.
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