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#the one i talked about in my fic tho was recent and it was a real reliable friend who got me and took me in for as long as possible
chasing-it-down · 1 year
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I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE SAYS. FREELATTA WILL ALWAYS BE AT THE TOP OF MY FAV SHIPS OF ALL TIME !!!!!!
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youngpettyqueen · 1 year
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Hi! "“and one more time”" for the WIP game?
ok im gonna cheat a little here cause "and one more time" is a sequel/part of a duo. hindsight being 20/20 I should've had it + "never again" together but I Did Not Think Of That
"never again" + "and one more time" are both gonna be really short oneshots that deal with the parallel scenes in MASH that make me the most insane- that being Trapper knocking Hawkeye down in Mail Call, and BJ punching Hawkeye in Period of Adjustment
I don't really have much written down for these besides the beginnings, so I'll put those down here...
"never again"
""Did I hit you?" Trapper asks out of nowhere.
Hawkeye looks up from putting his boot on. "Huh?"
Trapper is sitting on the edge of his cot, frowning with a look like he's studying him. "Yesterday, when I was... you know," He gestures vaguely, "Did I hit you?"
Hawkeye considers him for a moment. He was hoping Trapper wouldn't remember that little scene. He thinks about denying it on the off chance he might be able to convince him that it didn't happen, but he knows he waits too long to reply, because Trapper looks about the guiltiest he's ever seen him look.
He looks back to lacing up his boot. "You barely shoved me." He tells him quickly."
"and one more time"
""How's the eye?" BJ asks out of nowhere.
Hawkeye was wondering when that would come up. He's amazed BJ managed to go the entire OR session without mentioning it. He looks up from where he's sitting on the bench, finding BJ hovering close to him as he tosses away his mask.
"It's fine." He replies. It only hurts when he smiles a certain way, but he doesn't tell him that.
Doffing his cap and tossing it aside, BJ hunkers down to be more level with him. "Mind if I take a look?" He asks.
"Go ahead," Hawkeye invites, "It's really not that bad. Charles already looked me over." He reminds him.
BJ's frown tells him he's unconvinced. Hawkeye supposes he'd feel the same were he in his boots."
basically both of these have Hawkeye dealing with the aftermath of his best friends hurting him during drunken bouts of homesickness, because the parallel there is absolutely insane to me. i do wonder how deliberate it was, considering MASH is pretty famous for not really sticking with continuity, but regardless of if it was or not its still very very good
comparing both episodes is interesting to me because with Mail Call, Trapper shoving Hawkeye over and trying to desert is mostly played for laughs and quickly diffused. there's some tension in the scene but its ultimately not taken super seriously, and ends as soon as Frank comes in and gives Trapper something to laugh at. meanwhile in Period of Adjustment that is VERY much not the case, with that episode having very few laughs overall. one of those comparisons that really shows the tonal differences between the first 3 seasons vs season 4 and onward, especially getting into the later seasons of 8 and onward
I had the original inspiration for a bit of a different idea a few months ago when I first started reading fic actually, there was like... one mention in a fic I read of how Hawkeye is perceived as this easy target for everyone's anger. I wish I could remember which fic it was off the top of my head, I dont even remember what the fic itself was about, but I still think about it. cause like... yeah, Hawkeye is often the target of unfair anger, and thats not something that gets explored a whole lot within the show, so here I am 50 years later to write angsty fanfic about it
thanks for the ask!! hope you dont mind me bringing in another WIP haha but I figured it was relevant to digging into my intentions with them
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toolazytodecide · 1 year
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Damn, I forgot what it was like posting in a popular Fandom
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x-pair-o-dice-x · 1 year
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Hi! I haven't sent you an ask before (I don't really send asks super often)! I've only just arrived recently to ur blog but it's sooooooooooooooooo cool! What do you think you could say is your favorite trope? Or some ideas that may have been swimming around in ur brain that you want to share? Your writing is really awesome! I wanna hear your gremlin thoughts! Please?? I love hearing everyone's just clinging thoughts that refuse to leave their mind that they might not even write but might want to be able to read! Or daydream about! I know I certainly do~
I should send people asks more than I do but oh well
i’m a bit tired and i would answer this tomorrow,, but i feel like i’d forget this exists,, fkfmfkfkfjkfjf.
anyway- hello hello, mx. anon! welcome to my blog!
also fair,, i don’t send asks often, either,,, dkdmdkdm.
favorite trope, huh? i like accidental fearplay a lot! a little tiny being so scared of a giant,, unaware that the giant is just trying to help, or is confused,, or maybe even playing a little game with them.
i definitely have more,, but i’ve suddenly forgotten every trope that ever exists,, dodjdodjfk.
as for ideas… again,, kinda tired,, don’t have a lot. plus, been a hot second since i thought about making g/t content.
mmm.. i did have some small thoughts based off of e/pithet e/rased,, since i read the book,, but i never went any farther that haha funny daydream i think about like once and then never again.
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nahoney22 · 1 month
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Hey :) I Hope this isn’t too late but I have a fic proposal.
Clones should have a lot of scars and propbably some insecurities, considering that to most people they meet they are ‚just clones‘. I was thinking about a female reader worshipping either Hunter’s or Wolffes/Echoes (I love my grumpy men) body. I think it is a cute idea to make them feel appreciated and loved. It can be NSFW or SFW, whatever mood you’re in.
I also have seen the prompts „i'm not scared of anything except losing you“ and  „ I am truly and unconditionally in love with you“ . They don’t have to be included tho
Congrats on 4k followers! You deserve it so much Honey
Byee
4000 Prompt List Celebration
Wolffe X F!Reader
SFW
word count: 937 words
prompts:
“I’m not scared of anything except losing you.”
“I am truly and unconditionally in love with you.”
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warnings: Angst and fluff, cuddling, talks of war and scars, light angst, female reader, established relationship, comfort, shirtless Wolffe, Spoilers for the latest episodes (6&7).
authors note: well seeing as we saw Wolffe so recently it’s only fair I pick this request. Sorry for the wait and hope you enjoy anon 🤍
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You awaken to the subtle shift of your bed dipping, drawing you from the haze of dreams. A gentle breeze hints at an open balcony, likely your Commander's doing.
You shift, eyes flicking to the chrono on your bedside table that reads the early hours of the morning before rolling onto you right, facing him.
He’s silent, usual. Shirtless, also a common sight, yet his shoulders bear an unusual weight. "Darling," your voice rasps with sleep, "is everything alright?"
He remains silent, a restless energy vibrating through him as his knee bounces with an unspoken tension. As your hand finds its place on the center of his bare back, a calming touch, his movements still, tension melting away.
"I saw Rex today," he finally speaks, the words carrying a weight you hadn't anticipated.
Your eyes widen, and you sit up abruptly. "Rex? I thought he died in a crash!" The unexpected revelation catches you off guard.
When things took a turn for a worse, you were discarded by this new ‘Empire’ yet Wolffe remained. Your relationship was a secret of course and things had been hard for the both of you. You didn’t agree with these new terms and what Wolffe was doing yet he felt obliged to do his duty. To be a good soldier.
Yet, at nights like this where he would sneak into your home when he should be in his own barracks, you always felt the heavy burden of whatever it was weighing on him.
"So did I... but there he was," he sighs, moonlight casting an ethereal glow on his cybernetic eye and scar. "A deserter, harboring a target the Empire seeks."
Your heartbeat quickens, anxiety gripping your thoughts. "You didn't harm him, did you?"
"No," he responds, a low rumble. "I let him go."
In a hushed tone, you respond, "Oh, well that’s a relief,” as you shift onto your knees directly behind him, offering a supportive presence.
Anticipating a bitter retort, you're surprised when he merely sighs, his head bowing as he falls into a contemplative silence.
Observing his stillness, your eyes trace a new wound on his back, joining the collection of scars. "How did this happen?" you inquire softly, your finger gently tracing the red mark destined to become another scar over time.
"Who knows? Falling from a cliff, getting shot by a civilian, crushed by rocks," he grumbles dismissively.
Moving closer, you delicately wrap your arms around his front, resting your cheek against his back. "Are you in pain?" you inquire, concern lacing your words.
He shakes his head, his hands finding yours to convey appreciation for the comfort. Though not one to seek coddling, the weight of the day has left him in need of solace. "No."
In a moment of necessary silence, a sudden wave of insecurity overtakes him. "Does it uh... look bad?" he hesitates, seeking reassurance.
"The wound?" you clarify.
He nods.
"No."
"Are you lying to me?"
"Wolffe," you interject firmly, gently squeezing his hands, "you know I wouldn't lie to you. We've discussed this. I promise it doesn't look bad."
His jaw tightens, a brief struggle visible on his face, but then he relaxes, allowing your words to penetrate. The scar on his face, a constant reminder, had often made him feel exposed and unattractive. Yet, your consistent reassurances that you saw him differently provided a balm for his insecurities.
“Each scar tells a story, a battle won,” you whisper, kissing his new wound as well as the small scars that littered the rest of his back and what you could see, “a battle lost…” He closes his eyes, knowing what scar you were referring to but allows you to continue. “You’re handsome. Nothing will ever change that or how I love you.”
He bites on the inside of his cheek, his face warming up by the softness of your lips against his skin in the moonlight and your sweet words that had him hooked from the start.
"Are you scared?" you suddenly inquire, and he turns his head, prompting you to move back while still maintaining the embrace. "That they'll find out you let the target get away?"
"I'm not scared of anything," he asserts with stern resolve, but a softness overtakes his expression. "Except losing you."
You offer a soft smile, leaning in to press your lips to his cheek. "Sweet, but I'm serious. Are you not concerned?"
His brow furrows, a hint of reluctance coloring his response. "I won't lie and say I'm not apprehensive. Kark, it wouldn't surprise me if they're already looking for me to reprimand. Or worse."
A twist of unease settles in your stomach, his words weighing heavily on your mind. Tears glisten in your eyes, and he realises his misstep. Without hesitation, he shifts to fully face you, reclining on the bed with his back against the headboard, pulling you close to his chest. "Let's not dwell on that. I'm sorry for waking you."
You roll your eyes at his attempt to deflect the gravity of the situation, but decide to take comfort in his presence for now.
As the soft sound of your snores fills the room, he finds solace in your embrace. He strokes your hair tenderly, a soft smile gracing his lips as he watches you succumb to sleep. "Beautiful girl," he murmurs, a sentiment he wouldn't express while you're awake, not one for overt displays of affection.
Before slipping away into the night, he leans down to press a gentle kiss to your forehead, his voice barely above a whisper. "I am truly and unconditionally in love with you."
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Masterlist
Prompt List Works
Tags: @littlefeatherr @kaitou2417 @eyecandyeoz @jesseeka @theroguesully @ladykatakuri @jambolska-grozdova @arctrooper69 @padawancat97 @staycalmandhugaclone @ko-neko-san @echos-girlfriend @fiveshelmet @dangraccoon @plushymiku-blog @chrissywakingup @pb-jellybeans @nunanuggets @sleepycreativewriter @erellenora @zippingstars87 @ezras-left-thumb @the-rain-on-kamino @tech-aficionado @grizabellasolo @therealnekomari @tech-depression-inventory @brynhildrmimi @greaser-wolf @tinyreadersmur @seriowan @kaminocasey @marvel-starwars-nerd @ladytano420 @ladyzirkonia @thesith @raevulsix @mssbridgerton @cw80831 @knightprincess @crosshairlovebot @whore4rex @imperialclaw801 @temple-elder @mysticalgalaxysalad @id-rather-be-a-druid @the-bad-batch-baroness @thiswitchloves9904
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wangxianficfinder · 27 days
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Fic Finder
March 23rd
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1. Hi. Looking for this fic wherein wwx tried to prank lqr and the elders by acting like a Lan. It backfired because they thought wwx was possessed by Lan An, especially when jwy visited cloud recesses (almost causes a war between jiang and lan). For it to end, wwx pretended to be Lan An and said goodbye then fake fainted (as if Lan An left wwx’s body)
please help me find it 🙏
Hi! I’m from the recent fic finder #1. Unfortunately that’s not what i’m looking for because I remember it being post canon (meaning wangxian are already married). I also remember the Lans asked lwj if lwj still do lovers stuff with wwx (as they really thought wwx was possessed by lan an)
FOUND? Wei Wuxian is Definitely Not Possessed by CursedBlessing (T, 20k, WangXian, Misunderstandings, General Dumbassery, Humor)
#1 I think was deleted. I know the fic they're asking about and I can't find it either.
Number 1 is the correct fic, it's just Chapter 3. / Yeah, 1 IS the correct fic, op's scene is the entirety of ch. 3
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2. Hey, I'm looking for a wangxianfic, in which wei ying and lan zhan are already married. Wei ying goes on a night hunt with the juniors and gets hurt. I think it was a cut on the stomach with poison. Lan zhan cares for him but wei ying is almost dying. Lan zhan is davasteted and says that he can't wait for wei ying again. It was a completed work and I think just 4 chapters. Please can you find the title? With kind regards @smarti1997
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3. I'm not sure if this is something I think happened in a fic, or it really exists, but on the off-chance someone know what I'm talking about - the Sunshot Campaign ends differently with Wen Qing/Wen Ning in charge of the Qishan Wen, and as part of reparations(? Maybe?) the family vaults are revealed. Wen Qing warns people not to touch anything but JGS is too greedy and grabs something and dissolves in dust? And then WQ opens the real vault, the first was to stop thieves. Thank you in advance! @katonahottinroof
I know which fic #3 is talking about but i cannot find it either, gonna go deep dive on ao3 tho (is it that one where the wens have a secret passage into the throne room that opens only with wen blood isnt it. unless im mixing fics too)
FOUND! ❤️ Gentians in bloom by teawater (M, 251k, WangXian, XiQing, XuanLi, Canon Divergence, Political Marriage, Dysfunctional Family, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Hurt/Comfort, Fix-It, LQR bashing (not really), POV Multiple, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Eventual Happy Ending, BAMF WWX, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, madam yu bashing (again not completely), MXY Deserves Better) the thing with jgs happen in chapter 34
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4. Hi writing in hopes that someone remembers this fanfiction.:
i once read a fic where LWJ and WWX were stuck in the Xuanwu cave and WWX was i think on the verge of dying but then something emerges from the waters and gives LWJ a deal that if he gives up his voices then as an exchange he can save WWX's life which LWJ obviously does so his voice goes away but by the end of the fic Wangxian go back to the cave where LWJ gets his voice back because he once again strikes a deal with that creature giving up his immortality or something that has to do with him being worshipped for gaining his voice back. was a one shot that i remember clearly and was on ao3 platform also thank you so much cause this blog has bought me my favorite Wangxian fics.
FOUND! Outside Another Yellow Moon by Vamillepudding (T, 10k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, YLLZ WWX, Fairy Tale Elements, Hurt/Comfort, LWJ Needs a Hug, Curse Breaking)
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5. help. hey i am certain the fanfics in my memories exist but they keep on eluding me so there are these 2 fics:
A) the premise of this story was time travel where modern WWX travels back in time when other WWX is living with the wens in the burial mounds when LWJ comes to the borders with his modern counterpart and when modern wangxian meet they have a sweet reunion in which they share a kiss after that they are joined by the hip much to the mortification of OG wangxian. WY's parents are dead (car accident) but madam Lan's alive and he calls her mother or mom and modern them is engaged they also have their phones by which they click a photo and after coming to modern world WY sees that as proof that it actually happened. read it on ao3 muti chaptered (completed) with either 4 or 6 chapters 6 being maximum
B) in this one the main Lan fam is captured body swap between WRH and LWJ occurs and after LWJ realizes what has happen he commands that his body's head be severed which is currently housing WRH's soul and LXC and LQR are present to see that happening and grieve over LWJ not knowing WRH was the one who died and LWJ doesn't inform them about the body swap but tells the guards to take LXC and LQR to their rooms he keeps his own body's severed head in his room also. LWJ asks guards to bring him WWX which they do but injured and WWX sees LWJ's severed head and gets angry he also practices to be more like WRH so nobody suspects this is the most clear i remember there were also i think one appearance of WQ and some from WX and WC was on ao3 ongoing atleast when i was reading think over 5 chapter but under 10 the last i had checked (i was so curios to know what happens next but i lost the fic)
thx and sorry if its too confusing
5B)
FOUND? where the sky begins by Shializaro (Not Rated, 17k, WangXian, Bodyswap, Blood and Violence, Body Dysphoria, Dissociation, Rape/Non-con Elements, Crack Treated Seriously)
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6. Hello! This is for ficfinder, I have lost track of two fics, and would very much like assistance finding them again!
A ) an Addams family style modern au. I cannot remember the title, but Lan Wangji enjoyed the taste of Hemlock tea, Wei Wuxian always dressed in gothic clothes, A-Yuan keeps getting possessed, Wen Ning would die temporarily every now and then then, and the reason Lan Wangji went to Yiling in the first place was to find his mother (madam lan is alive in this one).
B ) Young Prince Lan Wangji fled the palace to avoid an arranged marriage, and met an older Wei Wuxian and traveled with him, keeping his identity a secret. Lan Zichen catches up with them after Wangxian have spent the night together (bottom LWJ), and Lan Zhan is taken back to the palace. Wei Wuxian returns to claim his hand, revealing himself as Baoshan Sanren’s heir. Fix ends with them watching their kids play in Lan Zhan’s mother’s garden.
If you can help me find these, I would appreciate it very much!!!! ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ @cullen-blue23
6A)
NOT FOUND🔒The Altogether Ooky WangXian Family by FluffyHippogriff (T, 72k, WIP, WangXian, 3Zun, Modern AU, Addams Family AU, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, mostly because death can be overcome with the help of a little necromancy, Kid Fic, Comedy)
FOUND! lovely thorns and singing crows by isabilightwood (E, 37k WangXian, Modern AU, Addams Family Vibes, meet cute at a funeral, Madam Lán Lives, Light Horror, Curses, Possession, Fluff and Humor, Developing Relationship, Found Family, Weirdo4weirdo wangxian, Eventual Smut, Blow Jobs, Hand Jobs)
NOT FOUND🔒darkness there and nothing more by wvlfqveen (M, 21k, WangXian, Addams Family Fusion, Magical Realism, Body Horror, Addams Family Levels of Violence, Identity Issues)
6B)
FOUND! Beyond These Walls, the Heart Calls by wayward_wing (E, 13k, WangXian, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Fluff and Smut, Adventure & Romance, Prince LWJ, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Bottom LWJ/Top WWX, Jealous WWX, LWJ Flirts, Sleeping Together, Masturbation, Slight Voyeurism, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Oral Sex, eating ass, Older WWX, Younger LWJ, Getting Together, Naive LWJ)
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7. Hi. I've been trying to find this Untamed fanfic which I bookmarked but somehow is not in my bookmarked collection anymore! :(. I think it's post-canon but WWX (of course) is injured and LWJ is helping him recover, told from LWJ perspective totally in-character where he has to remind himself to breathe. Once,wj returned to inn room, found WWX gone from the 2nd bed and he tripped over his own feet and was "resigned to the fall". Once he tucked WWX into his bed and sat at his desk to breathe.
FOUND? Always Light My Way by cqlorphan (E, 27k, wangxian, Post-Canon, Getting Together, Friends With Benefits, to lovers, wherein dual cultivation may be counted as a benefit, Jealous WWX, a little bit, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Pining while fucking, angsty sex, Switch WangXian, Bottom LWJ, Service Top LWJ, Topping from the Bottom, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Coming Untouched, Dom/sub Undertones, the angsty sex happens in the beginning but they get past it dw, Oblivious LWJ, archer wwx, Smart WWX, Porn with Feelings, probably at least half of this fic is just that, Panic Attacks, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dual Cultivation)
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8. thank you again for this wonderful blog! loading up on fics for my next offline trip and i have one that is driving me nuts. I remember seeing the reference here awhile back but for some idiot reason didn't bookmark it. What I remember is something like this : its after canon - Wei Ying is back, its after Guanyin's temple - but Lan Zhan has a soulmate to get back to so leaves Wei Ying alone on the road. that scene in Untamed haunted me. does this ring any bells? appreciate any help!! @oldoni
FOUND! Boy Trouble, We've Got Double by saltyfeathers (E, 60k, wangxian, Post-Canon, Case Fic, betrothed to someone else, unfurling of wifexian scrolls: the fic, Pining, Unresolved Sexual Tension, (it gets resolved lol), WWX POV, Protective wwx, WWX centric, explicit stuff only happens between wangxian, (or wwx and his own hand), Masturbation, get wwx a fainting couch agenda, Alcohol, wwx has some brain problems in this one, Consensual Non-Consent, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, straight boy WWX)
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9. Hello! Please help me find this fic. I don’t remember much, but there was an OC lan elder, who is rescued or helped by Wei Wuxian. I am not sure but Wei Ying didn’t know he was a lan or something. Later on they meet again and elder favours or helps him. I am sorry for being vague, but this is what I remember. It would be great if somebody knows what this fic may be !
Hello, this is requester for number 9. I am really grateful for the person who replied but unfortunately I don’t think that it is the fic I am looking for. As far as I remember wasn’t QHJ, rather an OC lan elder. However I really love the suggestion and enjoyed the fic, so thank you for that!
NOT FOUND The Shadows of My Old Palaces, Falling Across The Moats by ChilianXianzi (T, 8k, WangXian, onesided QHJ/WWX, Canon Divergence, Burial Mounds Settlement Days, QHJ lives, Domestic, Angst, POV Outsider, Age Difference, Fix-It of Sorts)
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10. for the FF: it was a fic where wx are full time dom/sub (sub wwx), i dont rmmbr much except that theres a part where jc causes a scene fearing lwj is abusing him (bc fulltime d/s, he chooses what wwx eats, wears, etc) and jyl has to tell him to shut up and that her and jzx are in a d/s relationship too! i read it ages ago T^T its not "something so flawed and free" by verseau btw! thank u guys <33 love u all mwah
FOUND! rainfall by daltoneering (E, 37k, WangXian, Modern AU, Established Relationship, lifestyle kink, 24/7 D/s, Kink Negotiation, kink discussion, Communication, BDSM, dom lwj, Sub wwx, Top LWJ, Bottom wwx, Kink Exploration, collaring, Body Writing, Breathplay, Orgasm Denial, Bondage, Subdrop, Safewording, Panic Attacks, [Podfic of] rainfall by exmanhater)
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11. Hiii! I don't remember much except for the first few chapters, but the fic was really long. I think the plot started off as "What if the Incident in Qiongdi Path never happened?"
The first chapter or so takes place at Jin Lings one month celebration
Wei Wuxian is really damn depressed the whole time (he's really damn depressed the whole fic actually)
Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan never die. Yanli wants to spend time with Wei Wuxian and she makes some soup, but he gets spooked at some point and Wen Ning helps him run away back to the Burial Mounds???
At some point later on in the fic, Jin Zixuan and Jiang Yanli go to Cloud Recesses and they bring some food for Wangxian.
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12. hii :D im looking for a modern au fic where lz works as a in pharmaceutics and meets wy who is the tech guy of their apartment. he calls himself mo xuanyu and lives with ayuan and is trying to escape his past with the help of police officer nmj. i think there was an autistic lz tag in that fic too. it was so good but i think i forgot to bookmark it.. thanks for your help! @harapecowee
FOUND! Stop and Stay by Fantazy_Eyeland7 (M, 98k, wangxian, LXC/NMJ, JC/WQ, JYL/JZX, LXC/JGY, SL/XXC, WIP, Blood and Violence, Hurt WWX, Kidnapping, Torture, WWX discovering weighted blankets, Pining LWJ, Modern, FBI Agent NMJ, Protective LWJ, Emotional Manipulation, Toxic JGY, not JGY friendly, LWJ learning how to communicate, WangXian have competence kinks, adopting children, Bad Parent YZY, Protective JYL, Protective JC, Protective NMJ, Past Child Abuse, Precious LSZ, Baby LJY, Warning: XY, Blind Character, slaps top of WWX: This bad boy can fit so much trauma inside, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Everyone is ending up in well-needed therapy, Child Abandonment, Genius WWX, Obsessive XY, Yunmeng Siblings Feels, Eventual Smut, Bad Parent JFM, Junior Quartet Dynamics, (As Babies!), Implied/Referenced Suicide, sort of a slow burn, but not really, because they KNOW, they just can't, Good Uncle LQR, eventually) It doesn't have the austistic!lz tag, but everything else fits.
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13. Hi! 🤗
I'm looking for two fics:
A) A fic where WQ makes a second operation with WWX and JC. The only thing I remember is that WWX is really in a bad condition and they ask JC to give the half of the golden core to WWX. He accepts.
B) I'm not sure if it's one o two fics that I'm mixing, but all I remember is that LWJ when he knows about the lost golden core of WWX, decided to make a second golden core inside him to give it to WWX.
Thanks for the wonderful work! 🥰 @wangxiansgirl
13A)
FOUND! The Fire Lapping Up the Creek by notevenyou (E, 66k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Hurt/Comfort, Canon-Typical Violence, Injury, Injury Recovery, Blood, Respiratory Illness, Major Illness, Fever, Grief/Mourning, Burial Mounds, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Hunger and food scarcity, Surgery, Fix-It of Sorts)
NOT FOUND! Twelve Moons and a Fortnight by stiltonbasket (M, 290k, WangXian, Humor, Slow Burn, Post-Canon Fix-It, Long-Distance Relationship, Epistolary, Love Letters, Family Feels, a-qing lives, teenage romance, Adoption, Romantic Comedy, Happy Ending, Weddings, Case Fic, Parenthood, Politics) might also be, (around chapter 43)?
NOT FOUND! in this place where we don’t have a prayer by Cerusee, Mikkeneko (T, 42k, WangXian)
13B)
FOUND? 🧡 Discarded by teawater (E, 178k, WIP, WangXian, Lots of Angst, Hurt/Comfort, YLLZ WWX, Golden Core Reveal, Case Fic, Depression, Family Issues, Self-Esteem Issues, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Angst with a Happy Ending, POV Multiple, BAMF WWX, dubious morals in the Lan sect, Feels, Pining, Grief, Fix-It, BAMF LWJ) If 13B is different from 13A, maybe B is Discarded Lan Zhan creates a "seed core" that Wei Ying can use to grow a new core.
FOUND? these colours fade for you only by doodlebutt (T, 36k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Everybody Lives, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, ...eventually, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, bed sharing, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Sunshot Campaign)
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14. Im trying to find a fic
It was modern setting and maybe has cultivation still? wwx is a tattoo artist and I believe lwj saw some type dark energy out side his shop. So he went in and ending up saying he wanted a tattoo, wwx was who ended up talking to him about it and making him a design. I think it had something to do with bunnies and, then finally when the day came for lwj to get the tattoo. He’s like I’m sorry I never wanted one, wwx gets upset and tells lwj to pay him money in cash for compensation. Lwj does that’s all I can remember I think wwx might have adopted or least helps take care of a -yuan. @zerokogane
FOUND! Demon Ink by Jade_Valentine (E, 189k, WIP, WangXian, Flower Shop & Tattoo Parlor, Tattoo Artist WWX, Magic, Chaotic Bisexual WWX, Demisexual LWJ, background NieLan, Slow Burn, Angst, But substantially less angst than canon, Mutual Masturbation, Domestic Fluff, Welcome to my LWJ & NHS friendship agenda, Shower Sex, Brief mentions of past Lan Bro abuse at the hands of LQR, wangxian family feels, WWX is the Best Dad Ever, WWX's canonical abuse at the hands of Madam Yu, Blow Jobs, Slight Make-Up Kink)
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15. Fic finder request please!!
This is a short omegaverse wangxia? I think it might’ve been part of a series? where it’s Omega WWX and YZY gets him married off to LWJ where she expects him to be treated badly. Instead bc the Lana treat omegas very well, WWX is happy and content. Meanwhile JYL is jealous that WWX actually got mating bites and equal status bc Jin Zixuan didn’t even do that for her. I can’t remember anything else. 😅
FOUND!🔒Alliance AU by Ilona22 (E, 21k, WangXian, JYL/OC, Arranged Marriage, A/B/O Dynamics, PWP, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Intersex Omegas, Not JC Friendly, Matchmaking, canon Jiang family dynamics, Family time, Night Hunts, Mention of male omega pregnancy, Intrigue at Jinlintai, Mentions of Prostitution, War, Conflict between characters)
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16. Sorry to be asking this(fic finder), I really don’t remember how I got to this fic but now I cannot find it but I feel like it probably was here
It’s a fic about how when wwx comes back to life he meets lxc instead of lwj in Mo manor. he asks for lwj and that confirms to lxc that he is wwx and not Mo xuanyu and asks him to go back with him to cloud recesses where he takes care of lwj who couldn’t heal after the 33 leash punishment.
At first wwx doesn’t want lwj to know that it’s him. He brings him bunnies and helps him re learn how to play the guqin(he cannot play it due to his injuries and because he hasn’t practiced since he was punished) lan Yuan helps wwx to learn how to play it and lwj starts being more active
Lxc is happy and let’s wwx go to a small one week vacation but lwj gets worse that week, he also discovers mxy is wwx I think
Tsm for the help🙇‍♀️
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17. hi! i’m looking for two fics:
A) one where wei ying lives with ghosts and is a teacher and runs into lan zhan for the first time in years during a class field trip
B) all i can remember is that wei ying wrote a software called yiling
17A)
FOUND! won’t take the easy road by twigofwillow (T, 47k, wangxian, JC & WWX & JYL, WWX & WQ, space au, yearning, found family, complicated family feels, ghosts, food, teacher WWX)
17B)
NOT FOUND Tempo Rubato by Spodumene (E, 107k, WangXian, Modern AU, Angst with a Happy Ending, Romance, Persuasion au, Separations, Mutual Pining, Depression, Miscommunication, Emotional Roller Coaster, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Reconciliation, Eventual Smut, Jane Austen Fusion, Underage Kissing) I think no. 17 might be "Tempo Rubato" but the software is "Stygian"
NOT FOUND The Fated Fortuity by devinokaze (T, 26k, wangxian, WIP, Royalty AU, Modern, Social Media, WWX is Wen Ruohan's son, Qishan Wen Kingdom, stangers to lovers, Prince WWX) The software is called Yin Tiger Tally and Su She tries to claim he wrote it lol.
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18. Hello!! All good? I'm looking for a fic in which WWX becomes a god after his death, I think he's the god of death if I remember correctly. I remember a part where Madam Yu and her Husband (the leader of the Jiang sect) decide to reincarnate... I don't remember much, it's been a while since I read it, another thing I remember is that he communicated with Jiang Cheng through dreams. I already searched the Tag Deity Wei Ying | Wei Wuxian but I didn't find it... Thank you for your work!! @sweettiebah
FOUND! 🔒 Of Destruction and Rebirth by demoniqt (M, 88k, wangxian, JYL/JZX, major character death, rape/non-con, underage, graphic depictions of violence, Slow Burn, Canonical Character Death, God WWX, God Verse, BAMF WWX, Grieving LWJ, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Divergence, Gods & Goddesses au, JC & WWX Reconciliation, Rabbits, Fix-It, Attempted Sexual Assault, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Gore, Castration, Lots of it, repeatedly, Punishment, Hell)
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19. heyy could u help me find a fic, I only vaguely remember the details
I read this quite a while ago, wwx is some sort of courtesan, pretty sure he works in a brothel, lwj is either a cultivator (like in canon) or he's a noble/king smth like that! he meets wwz in the brothel place and I think wwx is pretty sly, MAYBE he's wearing dresses and I'm pretty sure they get married in the end? I think someone in the lan clan is against wwx (either lxc or lqr) and I'm also pretty sure it's a pwp, they might have been conspiring too, it's all very vague! any help would be appreciated thanks!!!
FOUND! 醉 | drunk; intoxication by sweetlolixo (E, 15k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Mythical Creature WWX, everyone falls in love with weiying at first sight..., Besotted LWJ, Romance, Pregnant WWX, Fluff)
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20. Hi I’m looking for a fix where sizhui and jingyi travels back to the past (maybe to the conference) and they make commentary during the entire time they were waiting to get back to their present. I think in this fix, sizhui revealed that some of the people (madam Yu and others) are listed on lan zhan’s lists. Sizhui also mentions that lan zhan has several lists for different things. Also jinyi called Jin guangshan jin guangshit throughout the whole time they’re there. Thanks
FOUND? A Room Full of Dead People by BurningBlueDiamond (T, 10k, WangXian, Time Travel, Fix-It, but not really, Canon Divergence, Conference in Qinghe but canonically they stay in Gusu, strangely fluffy, POV Outsider)
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189 notes · View notes
missdaytonawrites · 8 months
Text
liar • a. anderson
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summary - manny and abby find you alone one night and take you back to the stadium, abby does everything in her power to swallow her feelings about you. even if it means pushing boundaries and lying. (enemies 2 lovers w/ abby's mean ass.)
WC - 4k
cw/tw - 18+ MDNI, post!outbreak abby, mean!abby, afab!reader, talk of guns and infected, seriously abby's unreasonably bitchy, talk of alcohol, abby cannot tell the truth to save her life, dom/sub dynamics, hurt/comfort kinda??? fingering (r! receiving) getting caught (if u squint girl, not really) apologetic!abby. slightly, every-so-barely, for a literal split-second... sub!abs, (mainly sub!r tho..) spitting, tribbing ooooh, abby smokes cigarettes, so does r! apparently, little bit of fluff, i kinda hate the ending?? maybe a pt. II to this will happen idk don't ask lol.
A/N - ..heeey people... here it is!!! i recently (like two days ago recently) gained a pretty serious injury on my pinky toe and i've been literally bed-ridden so i had no choice but to get this out. i love this song, i've heard this song live, this song is so request-this-is-based-on coded so!!!! (*edit* nonnie if u see this i hope u love it mwah) i kid you not i started writing this on the two-hour drive home from the paramore concert and i've just now finished it. i'm super personally proud of this and i will say -- YOU 100% HAVE GOT TO, LISTEN TO THE SONG WHEN YOU READ. with most of my other fics, it's really optional but for this?/!:?):!; put headphones in, turn this song on loop, AND THEN READ!!! it will completely enhance the fic. thanks 4 readin as always, love you crazy bitches.
"love is not an easy thing to admit, but i'm not ashamed of it."
this was fucking gross, the dirt was cold and wet. bordering on mud status and now seeping into the cloth of your shorts & t-shirt as you lay into the earth. you were tired and just needed some rest before you continued on. the old abandoned house you had been using as shelter became over-ran with some infected while you were out one day. so it was back to the forest floor for now.
gross, cold, and wet. the way she had found you, curled up and fast asleep on the ground, she almost wished that she felt bad. she didn’t though, instead for a split second she forgot manny had been following behind her as she took the barrel of her gun to press into the side of your face. she pressed in a little harder and you shot awake at the feeling of something touching your teeth through your cheek. your eyes fly open and they’re met with two shadowy figures above you.
one is a lot larger than the other, the one who had been poking you with the gun crouched down to get a better look at you. through her inspection, manny could be heard behind her muttering something about “we can’t just leave her here, abs.” abby didn’t really care for what he was saying, instead she was silently cursing herself for the emotion that began to crowd her train of thought. abby had toughened herself up enough so these sorts of things wouldn’t happen. she, or the rest of the WLF couldn't afford any emotional attachments. abby didn't need to be going out and developing crushes on sleeping beauties in the woods. yet here she was…
maybe that's why she grew to detest you so severely. treating you so harshly so her mask didn't slip, it was the only way for her. especially the night they found you. she couldn’t even begin to fathom how badly she wanted to just grab you up, take you back to clean you off and keep you safe with the rest of them. instead, she shook you (and manny’s new found excitement, like they found a stray puppy) off, pulling her gun away from your face and stepping about eight feet far from you to speak with manny.
it was back and forth the entire time, manny weighing in all the pros while abby lays out all the cons. true childish banter begins to ensue and abby begrudgingly agrees to bring you back with manny, claiming he’ll “deal with any consequences.” they walk back over to where you lay, awake and pissed. you had just started to fall asleep for fucks sake, “look, you’re coming with us. don't argue and just be grateful that it's we who ran across your ass and not some raider." abby sighs then pinches the bridge of her nose, you would like to argue but the darker haired one looks rather excited for you to be coming, so you bite your tongue for now.
it had been six months since that night… six months of falling in love with your new life at the stadium, six months of manny becoming the closest friend you’ve ever known, six months of training.. six months of a total cold shoulder from abby. you didn't even know if you could call it that, lord knows she never spared her snarky comments towards you at dinner or when the two of you got paired together on runs. always saying something about how you never do anything right, then carrying on while she tells you all the reasons they should've just left you there in the forest to rot.
you take on each day with your head high, trying not to let abby bother you. even if you couldnt seem to crack her fucking issue with you, reminding yourself that everyone else enjoys you and is glad you joined them. especially manny, he was a great pal, always sitting with you at dinner and reading with you. one night he had pulled you out of your book and talked you into having a drink with him, so you did. the two of you passed the bottle back and forth all night, intoxicating yourself enough to blab about abby.
“i just don’t fuckin’ get it, i guess.” taking another swig, you chuckle and hand manny the bottle back. “maybe i just see myself differently than she does.” he looks like he’s thinking and before he can say anything you start again, “does she talk about me? i mean, have i done anything to her that i’m just oblivious to?” manny doesn't say anything, just throws back whatever is left in the whiskey bottle and looks at you sympathetically.
“she doesn't really talk to anyone about things like that, maybe you did.. nobody will ever know.” you sigh and cross your legs. you and manny enjoy the silence for awhile before there’s some shuffling to the side of you two and then just like magic, there’s abby. rearing her mean little head like she heard you twos conversation. much to your chagrin, she did and as she takes her seat next to manny she whacks his shoulder and grumbles something along the lines of “couldn't save any for me..?”
abby's presence captures all of manny's attention while she talks him into going to grab another bottle, you sit uncomfortably and slightly tipsy as she finally convinces him. he gives you a little salute before heading off, leaving you and abby alone. you feel the liquor drop like an anchor in your stomach and your eyelids become heavy, you suddenly aren't sure how much longer you wanna stay.. where did she come from? if she was listening, why? you could have sworn manny said everyone else was out for the night..?
you’re so deep in thought that you don't notice abby has moved closer to you, and has been slowly muttering in your ear this whole time. it isn’t until she is literally snapping her fingers in front of your face, that you pull yourself out of your trance. when you turn to look her in the eyes, you notice just how close she had gotten. taking a sharp breath she starts again, even slower this time, like you wouldn't understand if she were to say it any faster. “i don’t see you differently, i see you for what the fuck you are… n’ i can’t say i’m the biggest fan”
you swallow and feel as if you’ve shrunk beneath her very gaze, “keep my fucking name out of your mouth, got it?” subconsciously scooting away from her, you nod quickly and avert your gaze. she snaps again, and your eyes shoot back to hers. “say it. tell me that you got it through your goddamn head,” and she moves closer. “now!” you squeak out a shaky “got it!” before standing and making your exit. on your leave, you can hear abby laugh at the situation from down the hall.
she has never taken something that far before? you can’t even recall a time she’s been that close to you before. guilt starts to float around you like a cloud above your head. you cannot believe you let her bother you so much that you left without saying a “good night.” or “thank you!” to manny.
flopping face-down on your cot, you conjure an idea; you rummage through all of your belongings to find some pen and paper. you write manny an explanatory note and let him know a little about what happened.
finishing up your letter, you can faintly hear him and abby laughing from your room.
“ah, abs.. you’ll have to get over yourself and tell her eventually.” he sighs and you can hear abby hiss at the thought. “nah man, i’ve already-” and then you remember how shes made you feel before, you decide you’re done eavesdropping and suddenly decide to no longer give manny the piece of paper you had been writing him. crumpling the note, you throw it at the wall and lay down to read.
an entire two weeks pass, you can confidently say you’ve not once thought about abby. her lack of kindness fails to phase you as the days pass. you’ve stopped eating with the group, opting for meals in your room instead. you’ve only really talked with manny only enough to ensure you and abby aren't partnered up for anything. it was smooth sailing for another two weeks, a whole fucking month passes and you cannot believe she’s really left you alone. you honestly didn't think she was capable, but alas, she hadn't even barely looked your way. you can’t help but let your mind race before you sleep about why? was she respecting your request? had manny scolded her? you remembered what manny had told you and settled with the fact that you’d never know.
one night, as you make your bed and pack your bag for the week, there's a quick rasp of knuckles on your door. “heeeeey! i know you’re in here, let me in.” manny, and he sounded drunk. unlocking the door and rolling your eyes, he stumbles in and flops down on your freshly made cot. “we have got to taaaalk..” he hiccups and rolls over to face you, “i need to know, please-” burping and then bursting out in laughter he rubs his eyes and sits up. “what reeealllyy happened that ni-ght.” you didn't think you could roll your eyes back any further than they did at that very moment, practically dismissing him you say: “i don't know what you’re talking about, what night?” burping, he looks at you like you’ve lost it, “c’mon, don't do that. i just want to know if she's telling me the truth…”
in that moment, your head whips around and you’re sure your eyes bugged out of your head. “the truth? what did she say happened?” manny matches the shocked expression on your face for a split second and then erupts in laughter, you worry for what he’s about to say. “look, don’t let this- this, don't tell her i said this.” swallowing and moving closer to him, you sit on the cot with manny while he tells you this extravagant story all about what “happened” that night.
apparently, that night, you told abby to her face that you thought she had a problem with you. apparently, on that same night you also caught an attitude with abby and got in her face. apparently, you stormed off in a drunken rage after allegedly jumping all over her case.
furious, you were so fucking mad. there were simply no words in the goddamned english dictionary to fathom how angry you were with her. she lied! right through her teeth! to manny of all people! about you! there was no holding back anymore, returning to the moment, you spare no gory details as you tell manny what really happened. to say the least? he wasnt very happy, you told him you were scared of her and didnt say anything sooner because you swore to “keep her fucking name out of your mouth.”
the conversation sobered manny up enough for him to apologize on abby's behalf and then exit rather quickly, leaving you to go to bed. you just can’t justify falling asleep, though. not until you make a plan, to your knowledge abby has no reason to be treating you the way she is; the only thing to do now is talk to her. you can be civil, at this point you just need to know why. so in a futile attempt to sleep, you rehearse with yourself what you’re going to say to abby tomorrow.
you wake up to bright sun, bam, right there in your eyes. you practically hiss and you turn away from your window, regaining your vision when your senses are flooded with an overwhelming scent of pine… you thought you were having a stroke, so you sit up and take in your surroundings. upon further inspection, and the realization that you’re definitely not having a stroke, you look around your space and low and behold..
there’s abby. hair falling loosely about her shoulders, still in her pajamas, sitting there just as annoying as the sun. you see her and glare, the tone of your morning immediately shifts and you turn away from her the same way you did with the morning light. grumbling something at her about how she needs to leave and how you two would do this later. you thought your point had been made until she grabs your arm and stops you from laying back down.
“look, i seriously can’t do this anymore.” she pulls you hard enough that you’re sitting up again. “i feel so fucking guilty, i don’t think i could even put it into words.” you almost laugh in her face, actually. “can’t do what anymore, abby? walk around and spew nothing but hate for me?” you realize how close she is and you reach out to shove her. putting some distance between the two of you, she opens her mouth to speak again but you interrupt her. “is it the whole lying to manny thing that made the guilt finally kick in, anderson?”
she returns to her spot in the chair on the far side of your room and sits, she chews her cheek while you rub your eyes. “don’t got anything to say now, huh?” she looks at you like she wants you to finish.. so you do. “i told you to go away, abby. we could’ve handled this later.” she stands up and walks over, sitting and occupying the empty space on your mattress next to you.
“i can’t keep living like this. fuck, fuck!” she shouts and stands, wiping her hands on her forehead. “i don’t know how to do this, and you aren't making it any easier.” you are genuinely astonished, in utter disbelief that she’s the angry one and that you’re gonna have to spell this out for her. “how about sorry? maybe go tell manny yourself that you are a fucking liar?!”
in that very moment, smoke might as well of blown out of her ears like a damn cartoon, “yeah. a liar.” she huffs and sits again. “lied to manny, lied about wanting you to keep my name out of your mouth.. lied about hating you.”
your jaw dropped, mouth literally hanging open as she continues, “i don’t know why, there’s no excuse. i am so fucking sorry.” she moves closer to you and puts her hand on your arm, gentler this time. “i haven’t said this to anyone in years, but i think i love you.” gazing down to her hand on you, then back up to her eyes you swallow the lump sitting in your throat. you don’t know what to say.
“abby, i,” you sigh and chew your lip, “i wish i knew what to say, this is all-” and then her hand moves up, silencing you when her thumb swipes over the expanse of your lips and then rests at the corner of your mouth. she leans into you and offers you two more words, “don’t talk..” then closes the gap between you two.
your lips are like heaven, everything she could have ever wanted. every night when she would fall asleep dreaming of them, this is it and more. she feels like she is fucking floating. she doesn't know what to do with her hands; they tangle in your hair, slide and touch your arms and then come up to cup your cheeks while she pushes into you impossibly further.
she breaks the kiss every now and then to mutter an “i’m sorry.. m’so so sorry, baby.” pulling away completely to admire you. she’s panting so heavily as she goes to pull your tank top up and off, immediately ducking down to take a nipple into her mouth. the cool air of your room hits you, head rolling back and around when you peer down at her, she locks eyes with you. pulling off you with a pop, she comes back up to kiss you again. except this time, its not a makeout, just short desperate pecks all over your face while she hurries to get your shorts off of you.
you help her out and shimmy out of them, completely bare, you fall back on your elbows and spread your legs for her. she lets out a low whistle and shakes her head, chuckling as she whispers, “goddamn foolish to deny myself of this..” bringing her middle and ring finger to rub circles around you.
she moves them down and pushes the two into you, twisting and curling them against your walls. you gasp and drop your head again, hands balling up into fists. abby notices your open mouth and kisses you again, pushing her tounge into your mouth and really fucking kisses you. her free hand rolls your nipple and then wraps in your hair, exposing your neck for her to suck and bite. “pussy’s so good..” whispering against your neck, fingers still fucking you while crude sounds bounce and echo off your walls.
she pulls her fingers out and hovers them over your clit. she looks down at your dripping center, wets her lips, and then looks back at you. “may i?” she asks and brings her fingers to her mouth to taste. her eyes knock to the back of her head and she brings her fingers down to rub you some more, “god, please let me, baby”
while you barely manage to moan out a response abby has already wondrously found her way down to your core, latching herself to your clit. she groans into you while your hips instinctively buck into her mouth. as if the sensation of her devouring you wasn't enough, her fingers plunge into you. writhing beneath her, your hands find a home in abby’s hair; and if her head weren’t literally between your legs, you would have stopped to comment on how soft her blonde locks are.
abby continues to fuck you with her fingers when all of the sudden, her mouth is pulling off of your pussy and delving into your lips yet again. the contact has you whimpering and an unfamiliar heat sizzles in your lower belly. you pull away from the kiss in attempts to speak, but to no avail as she simply just follows you back and keeps kissing you. “don’t run from it, baby.. don’t run from me.” she pulls away from your face and drives her fingers into you, fast and mean and determined.
your breathing quickens and you’re suddenly so much more aware of the way she's leaning over you, the darkness in her eyes, the way she’s heaving as she watches your body react to her touch. you’re close, so, so indescribably close to the edge; just about to explode beneath her when.. knock knock knock!
“abs?! you guys in there?” manny, banging on your door to innocently check the status of you two’s “making up.” abby’s eyes flicker down to yours and her free hand flys to her own lips, pressing a single finger to them, hushing you. “i got this, stay quiet.” she whispers and gives you a peck then clears her throat. “yeah man! we’re all good, just talkin’!” she shouts at him, never once slowing her pace while your orgasm just bubbles within you.
manny laughs, “cool, cool. just wanted to make sure you aren't like.. murdering her or anything.” abby laughs this time, murdering something else for sure, and lets him know you two will be out soon enough. you hear his footsteps trail off, and without a second to think, abby’s kissing you again. you whine against her lips and she coos, practically begging you to cum on her fingers.
“let go, give it to me baby, please.” your legs spasm and she chuckles, bringing her thumb to your clit as you gush onto her fingers. hips circling and following the movements of her thumb while you ride it out, abby watches in amazement. she removes her fingers from you as you come down, and makes quick work of her own bottoms. discarding them on the floor, she grabs one of your legs for leverage and swings one of her own over your torso. positioning her pussy right over your own, she trails a line of kisses down your calf and to your knee. resting her forehead against your leg and huffing when she finally grinds down into you.
your mouth falls agape, and you reach to touch her; any of her. her arms, her hips, her chest. gasping while she bites the meaty part of your calf, you buck into her and she throws her head back at the increased friction.
“such a good girl, y’know that..? so fucking good..” her hips rut back and forth and sweat drips from her forehead and runs down your leg. looking down at where the two of you connect, abby spits on to the both of you and fucks you harder. she’s the one to whine this time, so fucking pent up from living with you for fucking months and not already doing this. guilt starts to grow heavy in her stomach again and she whimpers then kisses your ankle, folding your leg to rest against her shoulder. she looks down at you and cups you face, clit still rubbing against you. “m’sorry.. fuck.” she grips your face harder and her pace quickens, incoherently mumbling out apologies and you feel your second orgasm start to swirl.
you shush at her and move your own hips quicker to keep up, “no, no abby, please..” she throws her head back again and her hands move to grope at your tits, you look up at her with forgiving eyes. nodding, as if to telepathically tell her that it's okay. that you want this and that you forgive her, she nods back and groans as loud as you’ve ever heard. you lightly tap her bicep and bring her back to the moment. whimpering, “gonna cum again, abs, please..”
she breathes and nods her head again, “m’almost there baby, almost..” sniffling, she really pushes down into you and her hips falter just slightly. “want you to cum with me, ‘kay?” she keeps fucking herself against you and you tremble, trying to move with her but you’re too lost in pleasure.
she winces and bucks her hips criminally fast; ushering you, and herself, to finally let go. she pants and sweats above you, her own orgasm crashing into her while you cling to her for dear life. pathetically writhing into her as you begin to unravel yourself. melting back into the bed sheets as she rides the both of you through your highs. her hips begin to slow and she’s kissing up and down your leg again. nudging her nose against your thigh, with a finalizing and triumphant breath.
you slowly creep back into reality and feel abby's weight shift off and away from you, just barely noticing her shimmy her shorts back up. she wobbles out of the room and returns with a damp towel, wiping the two of you down. she lets you lay and rest while she digs in her shorts pocket and pulls out a pack of cigarettes, she takes one out and lights it, and then crawls into bed with you.
she tucks you under her arm and wraps your blanket around you both, taking a long drag from her smoke and flicking the ash somewhere to her side. exhaling and turning the cigarette towards you, she slides the filter between your lips and lets you get a good pull.
it stays this way for a while, quiet and still. wrapped up in eachother, you two finish the smoke together and she puts it out right on your concrete floor. she pulls you in even closer and kisses your head. you sigh and close your eyes, saying it back for the first time, “i love you too, abby.”
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jeeeeez, editing this was sooo headache-flavored. anyway! happy reading! wish me a decent recovery, and also?? lmk if you guys want a more in-depth story behind my fucked-up toe or pictures for that matter lol!!!
873 notes · View notes
ghost-bxrd · 2 months
Note
I’ve been getting really into magical stuff recently and also DC so I’m just gonna drop this here:
Fae Dick Grayson
F A E
okay so fae stories are special to me because I grew up on hearing pagan folklore and fairytales about fae and fae adjacent creatures as good night stories so hooo boy yes I adore that trope! (I mean, I made Dick a Banshee in my fic Shuck so… hehe)
Anyway, Fae Dick Grayson! There’s just so many things you can do with it ✨
Robin appears from one day to the next, following in Batman’s shadow like a mischievous sprite, so honestly rumors have been going wild about him since day one. Robin actually being something non-human doesn’t really come as a surprise!
The fae folk are known for being awfully good at blending in with regular humans when they put their mind to it, the only thing that puts them apart (in most stories) is their otherworldly beauty, and Dick Grayson? Well, he’s definitely got that in abundance.
Just sometimes, when the light reflects off a surface in just the right way, when someone pours a glass of water and you happen to look right through the spray, or when you think you catch a glimpse of something out of the corner of your eye and you spin around— but there’s only Dick Grayson, even if a second ago you could have sworn you saw eyes where there weren’t supposed to be any; colors that aren’t supposed to exist; feathers where only skin has any right to be.
And, gods, all the talking. Dick is terrifyingly good at talking to people without actually saying anything, to the point where you walk away from the conversation feeling utterly drained after spilling your entire life story but when you think back on it— you can’t remember him ever telling you anything about himself. You know there were the usual pleasantries of “hi” and “nice to meet you” and “how are you doing?” but anything beyond that just kinda… seemed to spill out of you? It’s very strange. It’s very unnerving. By the end of the evening you other convince yourself you’re overreacting or you simply push the incident out of your mind altogether.
And there’s another thing about Dick. His name.
He only ever introduces himself as Dick Grayson/Robin. Never Richard. Never. Especially not Richard John. Names are sacred for the fae folk, names have power, so while Richard John Grayson may not be Dick’s true name, he treats it as such to honor his parents. None are allowed to use it. None except Bruce or Alfred on special occasion.
Of course, Dick’s “true” name isn’t exactly a secret so when someone does happen to use it… well, Dick may be… other… but he’s still intrinsically good in a way many of his kind don’t have the patience to be. Dick judges on a case by case basis, just like his parents and Bruce taught him. And usually people do not mean it maliciously when they use his name so he kindly corrects them and that’s that. But oh man, if they still insist on calling him “Richard”? Well..
“Oh no, it seems your credit card is being declined, sir!”
“Sheesh, you tripped over a root? In Gotham?!”
“What do you mean ten birds flew into your window last night? You live on floor level!”
“Dude I’m telling you that rash doesn’t look normal.”
“I… don’t think crows are supposed to follow you like that.”
It’s little things (most of the time, unless you really pissed Dick off) but they keep piling up, slowly driving you insane. You feel like you’re being watched, but it’s just a bird sitting on the window sill again. You feel like someone moved all your furniture just slightly to the right even tho you checked all the cameras.
The fae are kind, but they are also vindictive when crossed.
(Thanks to Bruce, however, I think Dick’s bouts of “vengeance” rarely go much farther than that though.)
Dang ok that ended up being an entire rant… wow. Anyway, yeah. Fae.
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sleekswosobession · 3 months
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you’re ok, you’re enough
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lena oberdorf x fem!reader
request: here
A/N: all feedback on my writing is appreciated, and hope you enjoy :) [even tho imo this is one of the worse fics i’ve written]
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I’m not a footballer by any means, but I do know the difference whether someone is just physically exhausted from training and games. And, when they’re also exhausted in other senses.
I can immediately feel the tension when Lena walks in, her muscles are tense and her lips are quipped tightly.
“Lena?” She stops her movements and looks at me inquisitively. “I’m ordering in, anything in mind?” She shrugs walking off, not saying a word. I need to get something out of her. Get her to talk to me. We can’t continue like this.
I end up ordering our shared favourite food and she comes back in from her shower. I look up and it looks like she’s been crying. I furrow my eyebrows in concern but she just shakes her head dismissing it.
The food arrives and I plate it before giving it to my girlfriend who’s sitting on the couch, lost in thought. She looks up and smiles slightly, taking the plate of food, starting to eat. That’s one good sign at least.
During the meal, I make sure to keep an eye on her. She can probably tell, I don’t care though. She needs to know she’s not alone. No matter how stubborn she can be.
Dinner is done, I put the plates in the dishwasher.
No matter what, I am going to make sure she tells me what’s going on. I can’t sit by and watch as she shuts down completely.
“Lena.” I say softly sitting next to her, placing my hand on her thigh. She stares at me with an unreadable expression.
“I’m not sure exactly what you’re going through right now, but please. Please tell me what’s going on. I can’t sit back and watch as you tear yourself up. I won’t do allow you to do this to yourself.” I see she has tears in her eyes. She bites her lip looking away shaking her head.
“Baby, you and I both know how this ends. I won’t watch you shut everyone out. I know you’re scared, I know you’re collapsing. But I will try my best ok?” I watch as her body starts to shake, a sign she’s going to breakdown. Immediately, I pull her into my chest and allow her to sob into my shirt. I whisper words of affirmation hoping that she believes me, or even hears me.
You’re enough.
You’re ok.
I’ve got you.
I love you.
I’m here for you.
You’ll be ok.
After around 15 minutes of her crying, while I try my best to comfort her in anyway I can, her breathing starts to even out as the crying slows down. Soon enough she pulls herself up and looks into my eyes. I wipe the remaining tears off of her face and wait for her to say something.
“I…” She starts to speak but stops. I don’t say anything, just waiting to see what will be said.
“The pressure.” She begins. “Usually, I’m ok with everything, I’m ok with different titles but recently things have gotten harder and harder and I just… I don’t know how long I can keep going. People keep saying I’m the next best but I don’t feel like it and I don’t want it. I just want to play football without all of this. It’s so tiring.” She says with a shaky breath as I give her a small smile.
“Lena, I can’t tell you I understand because I don’t. You have so many people here, so many friends. You may not feel like you’re one of the best and you don’t need to be. Just be you, forget about everyone else’s expectations. Ignore what they have to say as hard as it may seem. Talk to people who might understand, maybe they can help take the burden. Make it easier for you. I know everything is wearing you out. Take a break, no matter how small. Do something you love. Hang out with Jule, hang out with me I don’t mind. Just try, not to let yourself get this low again. Please.” I say tilting my head.
She nods, allowing the words to sink in fully.
“Now, how about we get you to bed? I can imagine you’re tired.” Lena nods and we walk into the bedroom, only heading for the bed.
Once we’re laid down and her head is on my chest I whisper.
“You know how much I love you, right?” I can feel her smile.
“Ich liebe dich auch.” Then we both succumb to the sleep that awaits us after such an exhausting day.
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Torn Apart Pt. 2- The Surgery
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I decided to name the fic about the reader losing her arms! Also I found out recently that Law has gold eyes in the manga AND WHY DID THEY CHANGE THAT HOLY FUCCCKKK
Also thank y'all so much for the overwhelming support for this fic!
This chapter is a little shorter than the previous one, but leaves off at a good place!
Just to recap tho...MAJOR WARNING: THIS WILL (probably) TRAUMATIZE YOU. Reader will have PTSD, ANXIETY ATTACKS, AND BE VERBALLY ABUSED. But becomes besties with Franky so ya know... up to you.
TW's: talk of surgery, Luffy being supportive in his own (lecturing) way, descriptions of pain, panic attack and PTSD flashback at the same time (trust me it's not fun), learning to walk again, needles (medical setting)
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Golden eyes pierced your faux air of confidence you put on to face the Surgeon of Death. You looked away, almost cowed by his evaluating gaze.
“So? What’s first?” you asked Law. He grunted a little. 
“Lay down fully. Let me do a scan.” 
You eased yourself down, and Chopper lowered the bed so it was flat.  You heard his boots tap on the wood twice as he stepped closer. 
“Room” 
A blue spherical glow emanated from his palm, encompassing you, the bed and him at the same time, with your prone body in the middle. You swallowed hard, nervous. He unsheathed his sword. You knew from Zoro that all swords had a name, but you didn’t know the name of this one. Probably named it something edgy like “heart killer” or “death of hearts”, you thought to yourself. He hovered his hand down the length of the blade, covering it in a thin sheen of translucent blue before holding his sword above your body. Your eyes traced the metal of the blade, so long that you had to turn your head slightly to see the point reaching far past your shoulder. 
“Stay still”, he ordered quietly. You snapped your head back to the original position, looking straight up at the ceiling, taking comfort in the familiar shield and knots in the wood above you. 
“Sorry” you whispered. He didn’t say anything in response. 
“Scan.” 
The sword moved down your body steadily. He really did have the hands of a surgeon. His boots tapped as he shifted his body as his sword scanned yours. He reached your feet, finally lowering his sword, but didn’t release his Room. 
“Tra-o” luffy’s voice piped up from the corner where he had been sitting quietly. He was the only one besides Chopper allowed in the room while he worked. His voice was strangely serious, and you couldn’t help but look over at him. His usual smile was replaced with a concerned frown as he met the surgeon’s gaze. Law sighed tiredly before turning back to you. 
“You were hurt badly. It’s honestly a miracle you’re still alive.” 
You kept your eyes on Luffy, taking comfort from his confident presence. 
“I know,” you murmured. A brief silence followed, waiting for Law to continue. 
“And you’re still hurting, in your heart.” 
You flinched slightly at his words, sliding your shocked gaze to his. 
“You can’t possibly know that” you breathed. He met your eyes steadily, unidentified emotion in his eyes. 
“My abilities don’t lie,” he answered. You kept looking at him, silent and calculating. You took in his features properly, now seeing him in a relaxed environment and not pissed off at your captain for once. He stood with confidence, slightly slouched as he tucked his hand in the front pocket of his spotted jeans. His other hand held his sword, the blunt side of the blade now resting against his shoulder. His spotted hat was low on his forehead, but as he stood looking down at you, none of his features were shadowed. His sharp eyes were gold, ringed by dark circles and reddened by lack of sleep, but both of those oddly only added to his handsomeness. He had high, sharp cheekbones with sideburns by his double pierced ears and a defined jaw with a goatee. His expression was calm, instead of the usual scowl he wore around your captain. Your eyes traveled to his clothing, a relaxed long sleeve shirt with a low neck that allowed small peeks of his tattoos to show. Honestly, you didn’t know how you didn’t see it earlier. He was fucking hot. Heat rose to your cheeks and he smirked as if he knew exactly what you were thinking. He probably did, the bastard. 
“So did you see anything else? Can you do the surgery? Why is her heart hurting? Is it because of Zoro?” Luffy spoke, half demanding and half asking. Law's eyebrow twitched as he remembered your captain was in the room. Chopper was on Luffy’s shoulder, looking at him with wide eyes. At least those two were too innocent to know what happened between you and Law just then. Law turned to Luffy, his usual scowl returning to his face. Tension rose in his shoulders and the blue glow of his Room faded. 
“I can do the surgery. It’ll be long, but it’ll be better for everyone, and be better quality. Not that you’re a bad doctor, Chopper-ya.” He spoke mainly to his fellow doctor, and the reindeer nodded. 
“I’m less familiar with surgery than you. Let me know what you need!” 
Law nodded in approval. 
“If I’m doing the surgery, I’d like to do it in the operating room on my ship. I have my crew who are trained as a surgery team, my equipment, and I’ll need you and Franky-ya there too. You’re familiar with the patient and injuries and are able to tell me exactly what you did to treat it. Franky-ya can add his expertise on the machinery and his own body,” he said firmly. Chopper nodded seriously. It was adorable when he was in full doctor mode. Law turned to you. 
“That is, if you’ll let me do the surgery.” 
He looked at you expectantly, cocking his head as he waited for an answer. You suddenly realized even his voice was hot. You cleared your throat. 
“Sure. Got nothing else to lose” you shrugged the best you could, and heat flared to your face a second time, embarrassed at your failed movement. Law only grinned in excitement and was about to respond when Luffy cut him off. 
“No.” 
You and the two doctors looked at him, shocked. A pang went through your chest. Was he not allowing you? Why? Did you do something wrong? Were you not worth it anymore? 
“Mugiwara-ya-“ Law’s growl was cut off by Luffy speaking over him, his eyes meeting yours determinedly. 
“You’re not going to do the surgery because you have nothing else to lose. You have everything and everyone else to lose. You have your life, and if you still have that, then you’re still fighting. You’re still winning. You still have something to lose. You have us. Zoro was an asshole and you never have to forgive him for that, but don’t you ever discount our loyalty to you. We are your family, and you're ours. This is your home. Say it. Say you have everything to lose!” He started yelling, and you struggled to sit up. Pain lanced through your chest and shoulders, making you bite your lip to keep from crying out. 
“Luffy…” you said softly. He stalked forward, and Chopper jumped off his shoulder. A dominating aura was rolling off your captain. He crawled on your bed, and stopped with his face only inches away from yours. 
“Say it.” 
Fear and despair shot through your stomach. You were terrified of letting them down, that you already had. 
“How can I when I can’t shake on it? When I can’t even reach out to grab your hand when you need it?! I’ve let you down, Luffy. I’ve let you all down!” 
Luffy didn’t waver, on his hands and knees straddling over your legs so as to not hurt you. His eyes never left yours, even as he spoke to Law. 
“Tra-o. Give us a minute. You too Chopper.” Neither doctor answered, but the door opened and shut, leaving you in silence. You looked down at the blanket pooled on your lap. 
“You haven’t let us down, and no matter what Zoro or anyone says, you’re part of my crew. My family. You sacrificed yourself to save someone you love. If I ever needed a hand to grab onto, well, Robin can make more, right? And you’ll have yours back soon. So stop being depressed and say you’ll do the surgery because you want to get better and that you have everything to lose!” He shifted so he was kneeling over you, one hand settling on the back of your neck as he pushed your face into the crook of his neck. Tears welled in your eyes, falling onto his warm skin and wetting his red shirt. His other arm gently wrapped around your side and rested on your back, encompassing you in comfort. It’s the first hug you’ve had since the accident. 
“Luffy I’m scared it’ll hurt. I’ve been in so much pain. It hurts so much” you sobbed, unsure if you were talking about your arms or your heart. He shushed you. 
“I’ll kick Trao’s ass if he makes it worse, okay?” You nodded, trusting him with your life. You stayed like that for a while, until his shirt was stained with your tears and snot and your thoughts were mostly in order. 
“I’ll do it. I want to live. I still have everything to lose” you murmured. Luffy’s hand squeezed the back of your neck briefly in acknowledgement. He pulled back, looking at your face. 
“Your face has snot on it” he observed gleefully.  You rolled your eyes with a smile. 
“Yeah I know.” 
His smile died as he brought the blanket to your face to wipe it. He was rough, pulling your skin just a little too hard, but that was your captain, so you didn’t mind. 
“Promise me. Promise you want to live and that you’re doing the surgery because you have everything to lose.” 
You smiled weakly up at him, but he saw resolve in your eyes. 
“I promise.” 
He smiled broadly before bringing his forehead down to meet yours. He still kinda bonked his head against yours, and he had a hard head, but he at least tried to be gentle. You giggled. 
“This is how we promise now, okay? You and me. No hands or arms necessary.” He spoke quietly, uncharacteristic of his vibrant personality. The words shocked you with his wave of affection and love for you as a family member. You bit your lip to keep tears from welling up. 
“Promise” you confirmed. He pulled back, a wide grin on his face. 
“Great! I’ll go tell Trao to get ready to do the surgery!” 
He bounded off your bed, making you wince at the sudden movement that rocked your body. You sucked in air through your teeth, and Luffy paused, looking back at you guiltily with his big brown eyes. 
“Sorry” 
You smiled, forgiving him easily. 
“It’s okay. I’m due for my pain medication anyways. Can you tell Chopper?” You asked. Luffy nodded with a quick ‘yep!’ thrown over his shoulder as he sprinted out the door. You shook your head at the pure amount of energy that boy had. 
Chopper returned a few minutes later and pattered around his work area, making fresh medicine for you. 
“We have a good plan for the surgery now! We’re so lucky to have Law with us too! He’s so smart and good at medicine. His Devil Fruit ability is amazing to see in a medical setting!” He continued to blabber on about how excited he was, but you couldn’t shake the nervousness of going into surgery again for something so life-changing after experiencing trauma. A straw and some pills were shoved under your nose, and you opened your mouth to let the doctor pop in the medication and you sipped some water to swallow it. You laid back down, flinching at how sore you were. A groan escaped your lips as your body finally rested on the soft pillow and mattress, waiting for the meds to kick in as you drifted off to sleep. 
Your nap wasn’t long, an hour or two at most. A screech from the deck startled you awake as adrenaline pumped through your body. Your shoulders and ribs screamed in white hot agony at the sudden movement as you shot upright, making you groan loudly with pain. I need to cover him. I need to save him. He can’t cut it. He can’t cut an explosion I need to save him I need to save his dream my arms are gone it hurts it hurts it hurts-
The kitchen door opened quickly as you curled up painfully as you started gasping in ragged, quick breaths, barely exhaling before gasping again. 
“Hey, hey mon Cherie” Sanji’s deep voice made you alert to his presence, but didn’t distract you enough to snap you out of your panic attack. Hands settled gently on your back and you jerked away, not wanting to be touched by Marines. Not when they took so much from you already. 
“I’ll get Franky,” he said quickly. Footsteps disappeared quickly as he swung open the door and ran to find someone. You’d already forgotten who, and the open door was too open. You needed to hide but you couldn’t move. Your breaths were controlling you, burning pain making you whimper. You wanted to hide your head in your arms but they were gone. 
Too much it’s too much it hurts hurts hurts I can’t do it I can’t I can’t I can’t I can’t do it gone gone they’re gone I can’t they’re gone. I can’t do it again I can’t do it again I can’t do it again. 
“Oi” a gravelly voice. You screamed a little as your head whipped around to the sound, fully expecting to be yelled at by Zoro again, maybe he’d hit you this time. Your wild eyes finally focused on Franky, and your tension eased a little, not seeing the swordsman standing above you. Franky blinked steadily at you. He’s safe. He’s good. Good. 
“F-f-f-rank-k-ky” you forced out through chattering teeth. 
“Hey sis” he replied. He moved his big hand, and you flinched, forcing another groan out of your aching chest. 
“I’m going to put an ice pack on the back of your neck, okay? It’ll be really cold but it’ll shock you. Ready?” 
At the explanation of his movement, you hesitated a second before nodding slightly once. He slowly moved his hand, which you now noticed contained an ice pack. He slid it against your sweaty neck and held it there. You whimpered at the cold, letting it send gasps through your lungs. He nodded in encouragement at the change in breathing. 
“You’re doing so good now. Focus on my voice, okay? I’m going to walk you through a breathing exercise. It’ll come back to you quickly.” 
You shook your head. You didn’t need to breathe, you needed to run. To leave. To hide. To be safe. 
“Not s-s-safe Frank-k-ky. Need to go. Need to go need to go need to go. Hide from it!” You wanted to grab his wrist, and started panicking when you remembered you couldn’t. 
“Hey hey. I’m going to pick you up, okay? Then we’re going to the corner. My metal body is strong and can handle it easily, " he said seriously. You nodded, and let him scoop you up and hold you close to his chest. He was warm, and you could hear an automatic whirring and beating in his chest. It was safer. He walked quickly over to the corner of the room, and knelt down, cradling you in his arms and lap. He curled over you slightly, letting his forehead rest on the wood behind you. You were enclosed and safe and warm. 
“See? All safe. All good” his gravely voice was soothing to your racing mind. 
Safe. Good. 
“He’s safe?” You murmured, blinking up at him. He nodded with a grin. 
“He’s perfectly healthy and safe, okay? Now breathe with me. I’m going to walk you through the square breathing. Remember that?” 
You felt small and raw, but you did. You remembered it. Franky smiled at your shaky nod. 
“Good. Are you ready? Breathe in with me for 1…2…3…4…and hold for 1…2…3…4… and out 1…2…3…4… and hold 1…2…3…4…” you followed his instructions numbly, trusting him completely. He repeated the commands and counting, and your hiccuping breaths eased slowly into smooth ones. 
“Relax your muscles. You’re safe. You’re good,” he said quietly. You let your head rest fully on his shoulder, relieving the strain on your injuries. You focused on your toes, relaxing those first before moving up to your ankles, calves, and thighs. You ended by relaxing your abs and back, letting Franky hold your entire weight. He let you rest for a few minutes before you blinked up at him, eyes clear now without your panic. 
“What was that?” You murmured into his shirt. Franky soothed a hand over your hair. 
“A flashback and panic episode at the same time” he answered quietly. You would’ve shuddered at his answer if you had the energy. 
“Am I going crazy?”  
“No. It’s a symptom of panic episodes. I’ve been doing research on them” he said gently. You hummed. You were tired of this room. 
“Can you take me out of here?” 
He stood with your body cradled against him easily. 
“Do you want quiet or sun?” 
You couldn’t make a decision right now. 
“Both” you said instead. 
He carried you out of the infirmary, and beelined immediately towards Robin’s flower garden. The smell of the sea and the feel of fresh air felt good, even if you were still emotionally numb. Robin was sitting there, calmly drinking tea as her eyes roamed over the pages of a book. To you, it never looked like she read the normal way, but rather took in parts of sentences all over the page and let them float together in her mind. You nuzzled into Franky’s shoulder, breathing in the fresh air deeply. The floral scent of flowers sweetened the air. Your shaking was stopping. 
“It’s a lovely day, isn’t it?” Robin greeted. You looked at her, a weak smile on your face. 
“It is, especially when you haven’t had fresh air for a while” you answered. 
“Mmm” She hummed in agreement. Franky sat you in a chair and took a seat in the one next to you. Sanji appeared and delivered a fresh pot of tea and extra cups before whirling away at Robin’s request for cookies. Franky poured you some tea and placed it in front of you. You sniffed the steam, breathing in a floral combination of chamomile, lavender, and mint, and a touch of cinnamon. 
“Ah, it looks like he brought you a different blend than mine. Do you mind if I have a taste?” Robin asked. You shook your head. 
“Go ahead.”
She poured a cup and brought it up to sniff before tasting it. 
“It seems that Cook-san used the lavender, chamomile, and mint I gave him from my garden” she said appreciatively. You looked down at the tea with new appreciation. 
“Shall I?” she said, an arm appearing from your armrest. You swallowed down the frustration at being helpless and nodded, leaning forward slightly. Robin’s arm picked up the teacup and brought it gently to your lips. You blew on it lightly and she tipped it the perfect amount for you to take a sip. The gentle flavors washed over your tongue, soothing your stress. It was sweetened slightly, just as an aftertaste. Sanji really was an amazing chef. You sighed, finally relaxing. Comfortable silence enveloped the three of you for a while, Franky taking a cola out of his stomach refrigerator and sipping on it. Robin seemed to have muscle memory from drinking so much tea that she hardly needed any focus to raise your cup to your lips and back down to the saucer. You reveled in the silence, because it was different from the silence of the infirmary. This silence was accompanied by the waves, footsteps, the breeze rustling the leaves of the garden and Nami’s orange trees. Voices of Nami, Chopper, and Usopp were all heard wafting back and forth, with the occasional annoyed grunt from Law. You looked back at your companions after soaking in the sun on your face for a minute. 
“Where’s Law’s crew?” you questioned. 
Robin answered cryptically first. 
“Maybe they were swallowed by a giant electric eel and Law is waiting for them to emerge from the other end before meeting up with them again” she said without looking up from her book. You blinked at her before breaking out into peals of giggles that were hurting your ribs. 
“Ow ow ow Robin stop making me laugh! It makes my ribs hurt!” 
Franky snorted at Robin’s answer. 
“He probably didn’t want them exposed to our ‘stupid mugiwara antics’” he imitated Law in the last bit, schooling his face into a stern scowl. You couldn’t help your giggles, and Robin laughed with you. The afternoon brought you joy and comfort, Sanji joining you briefly between his kitchen chores as he smoked. Usopp and Luffy joined before going off to fish and then coming back hours later to fetch Sanji, interrupting his dramatics towards you and Robin. It made you feel normal. 
Normal. 
You yawned, exhausted from being outside. You went to stand before an ache in your chest brought you back to reality. Franky saw your flinch and the clench of your jaw. 
“Wanna go take a nap?” he asked. You nodded. He went to pick you up, but you shook your head. 
“I want to try walking.” 
Franky smiled gently. 
“Just let me call Law up here. I think he mentioned something about wanting to see how walked earlier.” 
Franky called Law’s name, the shouted ‘Tra-o’ making the surgeon look over his shoulder from gazing at the waves with his signature scowl. Franky pointed to you and told him you wanted to try walking. Law’s expression eased slightly, becoming more clinical than pissed off. He quickly approached your little group, his sword slung casually over his shoulder. Luffy raced over at the announcement. 
You swallowed nervously at Law’s swagger towards you, looking away as your heart fluttered. His boots tapped on the wood planks until he stood in front of you, hip cocked to the side and free hand tucked in his pocket. He lowered his sword, placing it flat on the ground in the free space near the table. 
“I’ll use my abilities. If you start to fall, I’ll switch you with my sword, okay?” 
You nodded. Franky and Robin looked on curiously. Luffy hummed in understanding. 
“Good. Now start by standing. Brace your feet apart so you have more balance” the doctor instructed. You slid your feet apart by opening your knees, and a brief picture of spreading your legs in a different scenario with the doctor flashed in your mind. 
“Good.” 
Butterflies erupted in your stomach at the praise in his deep voice, before a spear of guilt at your infatuation killed them. You breathed deeply, clearing your mind of your thoughts. 
“Room.” 
The blue dome enveloped you and your group. You noticed it also reached the infirmary.  
“Why not just switch me to the bed if I start to fall?” you asked. Law blinked at you. 
“Figured you’d want to be outside longer but I can do that instead” he offered. You nodded, yawning. Law picked up his sword, and leaned it against his shoulder again. 
“Now try standing.” 
You shifted your weight slowly onto your feet, managing to rise to a standing position. Law hummed. 
“Walk.” 
You shuffled forward a little, adjusting to your shift in weight and balance. You stopped, looking at the doctor. He nodded once. You swallowed nervously at the thought of walking again, but slowly shifted your weight to one foot as the other took a full step forward. You pushed off your other foot, letting your weight shift onto the one you had just stepped forward with. Your back foot swung forward, and landed easily. You looked up with a smile, meeting Luffy’s excited grin. Eagerly, you pushed forward, but ended up pushing forward too quickly, and you couldn’t get your other foot under you in time. Your shoulders ached horribly as the healing muscles twitched at your instinct to use your arms for balance, and the pain swept your sense of balance away. 
“Shambles” 
Tears pricked your eyes in frustration and pain, your jaw clenched against the current of them both. Your chest wanted to rise as your body writhed with the pain, but doing so only made your cracked ribs scream at you. 
“Fuck!” you shouted instead. You were on the bed in the infirmary, alone. The door slammed open, revealing Law holding the blanket to your bed. You looked at him, tears blurring your eyes. He walked over quickly, dropping the blanket at your feet. You heard more footsteps come into the infirmary, and you grew mortified at your weakness.
“Everyone out!” He ordered. You looked at him, finally managing to gasp in some shaky breaths. You distantly heard footsteps retreat and the door close. His golden eyes looked down at you, concern raging behind his cold exterior. 
“Room. Scan” He wielded his powers with ease, his sword moving through the air over your chest and shoulders. You tried to stay still, but it was impossible as the pain lanced through you. The surgeon sucked his teeth and put his sword away. 
“Your wounds didn’t get worse. Let's get you some medication,” he said. He stepped to the door, and called for Chopper. The small reindeer trotted in, immediately going to his desk to mix up a strong pain medication. You whimpered, closing your eyes as your mind began to spiral. 
“Oi. Look at me,” Law demanded. You opened your eyes, bringing them up to look into his golden eyes. He wiped your years off your cheek, and placed his arm at the head of your bed, leaning his weight on it as he bent over you. 
“A broken body doesn’t mean you’re broken. You’ll heal, and I’m going to help you.”
You sniffled. 
“I’m scared. It hurts so much” you mumbled, keeping your gaze on his. 
“I know, I know. It’ll be okay soon though” he brought his forehead down to yours, bringing your focus to the point of contact. It was soothing. His other hand cradled your jaw, and he pulled back as he moved his hand on your head to stroke his thumb gently over your eyebrow repeatedly. It was oddly soothing, and you found your breath quickly returning. You closed your eyes as your body began to relax, starting to ease the pain.
“There, see? I know it’s scary, but you have everything to live for',' he murmured. Law slowly pulled back further, letting Chopper move forward with your medicine that he had dissolved in a cup of water. You scrunched your nose at the bitter smell, knowing it would taste awful. You looked at Law for a second, and he gave you a nod of encouragement. You sighed, and parted your lips so Chopper could angle the cup in your mouth. You groaned at the taste, hating the bitterness and saltiness of the medicine. It was different from what he had given you previously. You pulled back for a breath and gagged a little. 
“Just one more drink!” the tiny doctor encouraged. You groaned, and unwillingly parted your lips again. The final gulp was gritty and worse than before, and you pulled away with a gag, yelping as your aching shoulder fired with renewed burning as you tried to slap a hand over your mouth to stop the gag. A straw was shoved into your mouth, Chopper informing you it was water quickly before you spat it out. You sucked it down gratefully, coming back to yourself. You noticed a warm hand on your back, between your shoulder blades, propping you up. You hadn’t even noticed you moved. Once you drained the cup, you looked to your side, realizing it was Law holding you up with a disguised look of pity on his face.  
“Never give me that shit again Chopper or I’ll kick your ass” you moaned. You suddenly felt woozy. Was the world spinning? Were you floating? You blinked once, before your eyelids lowered slowly one more time. 
Apparently you slept all the way through the night, waking early the next morning before the sun rose. 
“Good morning!” Chopper greeted you with a smile. You smiled back at him before registering what he said. 
“Morning?” 
He gave you an affirmative nod. 
“Yep! You slept all the way through the night. It’s about 5am now,” he informed you. You groaned. You were hungry. 
“Can I get some food?” 
Chopper looked at you a little sheepishly. 
“N-no. See, with your surgery today, it's best if you don’t have food before the anesthesia.” 
A punch of anxiety speared through your gut, and you sighed shakily. 
“...right. So Law’s crew is here?” 
The reindeer nodded. You took a deep breath. 
“Okay. Let’s do this. I have everything to live for” you murmured. Footsteps echoed outside your door, coming closer. A quiet knock rapped three times before Law poked his head in the open door. Once he saw you were awake, he entered the room fully. 
“You’re awake.” 
You nodded, swallowing down your nervousness at his presence. Not only was he incredibly good looking, but he was also the one going to do your surgery. If he was here, the crew must almost be ready for you. 
“I came to transport you to my ship.” 
You nodded again. 
“Are you ready to do… it?” you asked, a wobble in your voice. The captain nodded with his arms crossed. He seemed more professional now, like he was in the mindset of a surgeon. He knew you were referring to the surgery, not the transportation part. 
“Almost. We’ve set up everything and we just need the patient to continue.” 
You looked over at Chopper nervously. He gave you a smile and what could be considered a thumbs up with his tiny hoof. It made you smile. 
“And you’ll be there too?” you asked the reindeer. He trotted up to your bed and pulled himself on the mattress with a little grunt. 
“Of course! And Franky will be there too!” he assured you with a pat on your knee. You breathed an anxious sigh, ready for this whole thing to be over. You looked at Law. 
“Luffy is going to kick your ass if you hurt or kill me” you threatened. It made you feel like at least something was in your control. The surgeon rolled his eyes. 
“One, I’ve heard that from everyone on this crew, and two, you have the best experts on the Grand Line doing your surgery. You have nothing to worry about. Now let’s go,” he held out his hand in preparation for his powers. 
“Room.” 
“Wait! What about Franky?” you said quickly. Chopper answered for the surgeon. 
“He’s already on the Polar Tang, and has been familiarizing Law’s crew with the bionic arms he made,” he said soothingly. You nodded, and squeezed your eyes shut. 
“Okay I’m ready.”
“Shambles.” 
You felt weightless for a second before suddenly laying on a hard, cold surface. You sucked in a breath as the cold touched the back of your neck. 
“You okay?” Chopper hovered over you cautiously. You nodded with a smile. 
“Fuckin hell Law, do you keep these tables in a freezer or something?” A shiver went through you as the cold seeped past your thin pajamas. 
“You won’t feel the cold soon enough once you’re drugged up. Stop complaining,” He answered curtly, and you couldn’t help how he talked to you a little differently when he was in front of his crew. 
“Captain!” a high pitched voice admonished. You looked over and met the eyes of a talking polar bear, fully geared up with a mask, scrubs, and rubber gloves. You smiled, recognizing him as Bepo from Law’s brief mentions of his crew. He met your eyes, concerned. 
“I know the table is cold. Would you like a heated blanket?” he held up the blanket, and you nodded, shivering a little more. The bear tucked the blanket around you with the help of Chopper, who had transformed into his more human form. Two more of Law’s crew members stood at the foot of the table, with Franky’s smiling figure hulking above them. 
“Hey big bro” you greeted the cyborg. He grinned back. 
“Yo! Are ya ready to have my suuuuuperrrrrr Franky arms? We’ll be kinda matching!” 
His enthusiasm calmed you enough to make you giggle. Determination lit in your soul with his support. 
“I’m ready,” you answered. You relaxed down on the hard table, controlling your breath and turning your head so the doctors had access to your jugular vein for the IV. A gloved hand gently wiped down the area before Franky placed a hand on your cheek, reminding you of his presence and affection.
“Okay. Get ready for the poke” Chopper said. You nodded stiffly, feeling your body tense in preparation for the needle. Franky put a finger on your chin, and tilted your head to the opposite side, and you opened your eyes in confusion. Your body began to relax seeing his grinning face, and you felt the brief sting of the needle before it was taped into place. 
“I’ll give the medicine now. It’ll make you woozy and sleepy, but remember you're safe, okay?” Chopper’s voice came from the other side of the bed, and you looked over at him with a nervous smile. Law was standing behind him, his golden eyes meeting yours as a small smile twitched on his lips. 
“Remember what I said about Luffy,” I reminded him. Law scoffed. 
“As if I would ever harm a patient.” 
You nodded at Chopper, and he began pressing the plunger on the syringe. You tasted an odd, metallic taste in your mouth and you smacked your lips, looking at the doctor curiously. 
“Some people can taste it” Law answered for Chopper. As soon as he said it, you felt a wave of dizzy exhaustion crash over your body, and you grunted a little, blinking hard and trying to focus your eyes. 
“Relax, we got ya” Franky’s gravely voice was the last thing you heard before you let sleep overtake you again. 
To those who asked to be tagged: @blue-rae18, @perilous-pasta
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𝐉𝐮𝐝𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐡𝐚𝐦 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
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All my fics for Jude ♥︎ some mature content (if over the age of 18 and you cannot see them go to settings, content you see and turn off mature block ♥︎ tag on Jude scenarios here
🩷 = mature
Last updated July 26th
A win anyways ♥︎ hi can u write jude x reader comforting him after losing the match?
A blurb with no name ♥︎ Can you do a little blurb with a jealous Jude? Maybe you’re a few years older than him and thinks you’d get along better with Trent?
Anything for you ♥︎ Request: one where jude takes care of you when you feel off/bad and the feeling comes out of Nowhere. Like you start to reminisce abt your childhood and it ruins your mood
The L word ♥︎ hiii could you please write a jude imagine where the reader and jude have a lazy day at home and it’s cute and fluffy and he confesses he loves reader for the first time? thank you 😊
Stay ♥︎ hi my love, would you mind doing an angsty jude bellingham smut where they have agreed to break up as he needs to focus on his career but they decide to spend one more night together and have very intimate but also sad sex before they have to leave eachother (and if you don’t mind have them kinda talk it out and decide not to split in the end if you want) thank you 🫶🏻 🩷
Biggest supporter ♥︎ can u write a Jude Bellingham fluff abt just going to his practices and games and being his biggest supporter
Kissing booth ♥︎ Based on a TikTok I saw. Where you tell Jude you love him while taking photos in a photo booth.
Makeup or breakup ♥︎ Jude says some disgusting things during an argument which results in you leaving for some space. Maybe you'll makeup... 🩷
The way he loves you ♥︎ Headcanon on the way Jude shows you he loves you
What about us ♥︎ Jude lied to you and said he was going to stay with you instead of transferring. You felt betrayed
Lust and envy ♥︎ Summary: IM BEGGING jude smut/angst where him and reader are broken up but he finds an old (rough?) sextape and he touches himself to it (we want details tho intense solo sessions are HOT😩) then yeah he regrets leaving her and wants her backkk, and then maybe shes with another guy and he gets all jealous and possessive (sorry to much details) I want toxic jude soooo bad 🤭 🩷
Soulmates ♥︎ sitting in the car in the rain, you and Jude havs a heart to heart
Initials ♥︎ I just know bf Jude would buy you a necklace or a bracelet with his initial on it 😍
The other woman ♥︎ Jude can’t get enough of you, but he is with another woman that's not you 🩷
My life ♥︎ Jude angst where he tries to break up with the reader because he thinks that his life is too much for her but she’s not having it. Just like ‘yea but no’
Mykonos ♥︎ You and Jude enjoy your time on the beach together but that was cut short when you both decided the hotel room was a better option 🩷
Birthday surprise ♥︎ you surprise Jude on his birthday after being away from him for a while. You give me him a little something as well 🩷
There's this girl ♥︎ Jude and the reader talking late at night because they barely got to talk during the day. They talk about the random things, laughing at each other shitty jokes And stuff. Neither wants to hang up because they love to hear each other’s voice )
Love languages ♥︎ all five Love language with Jude 🩷
Hidden feelings ♥︎ Can we got some enemies to lovers with Jude maybe him and the reader “hate” each other but are in the same friend group and one day reader gets hurt and he rushes to come and help her 😩😩 anything will don’t tbh
Soul intertwine ♥︎ English is not my first language so sorry for the mistakes… I was thinking about something fuffly + smut. Like the reader being innocent and a shy person. She and jude got into their relationship recently and they have had no sex yet bc jude don’t wants to pressure her to do anything (but ofc he wants have sex w her), especially when he starts to realize how innocent she is… he thinks she’s too cute and at the same time he wants to ruin her, he feel the need to protect her. But when y/n is in a convo w her girlies friends and one of them asks about her sex life w jude and she don’t know what to say, she would be curious about it but would be too shy to talk w jude about it he would find it weird that she was quiet and looking bothered by something and would talk w her. After insists a lot, she finally says about all the stuffs that she heard about her friends and she would be “idk how react” and jude gets fully turned on by her innocent but makes he’s best to not show ithe tries to find a way to explain for her without destroy her innocent but she wants to know about everything and she wants him to do everything w her bc she wants to be his. 🩷
๑‧˚₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹๑‧˚₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹๑
Main Masterlist
© writing by Iguessweallcrazyithinktho do not steal or repost any of my content anywhere without my consent
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shigarakisslutbag · 5 months
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So I have shigaraki brainrot. So bad LOL. And I'm a huge fucking simp so I would like to say some things about my (our) mans. Before I do tho y'all should know that my therapist made my love for shigaraki so much worse because I very briefly talked about him while we were talking about coping mechanisms for PTSD flashbacks (long story LOL)
ANYWAYS-
I know he's just a character, but this is Tumblr and if I wanna babble about nonsense then I think this is the place.
I want to talk first about how it still rubs me the wrong way sometimes when people make fun of his skin and "crusty-ness". I think a lot of people forget he has a skin disorder (excoriation disorder). Before AFO his mom put (what looked like to me) prescribed ointment and medications for his itching.
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I mention this because so many people act like he just... looks like that because of bad hygiene or something?? And it's not. He has a medical condition that he can't properly take care of because he doesn't *exactly* have the resources for that.
Speaking of hygiene, I see lots of people say that he probably smells (even in headcanons for fics), and while he probably doesn't have an entire hygeine routine, I'm sure he at least bathes because his hair is??? So fluffy?? LOL. Because I've had hair his length before (in the beginning of the manga/anime), and let me tell you, unless he's just that perfect (I mean he is, but not my point), he would have to wash at least semi frequently to keep his hair from getting oily and flat. And that man has FLUFF.
LIKE??!
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AND??
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His hair has a mind of it's own.
It does get flat/oily in later seasons, but he's outside a lot and most likely doesn't have anywhere to shower like he probably did in the beginning seasons.
My brother actually has issues with dry and itchy skin as well and one of the most common things he does to relieve the itch is to shower and moisturize, but no amount of proper hygiene is going to fix shigaraki's scarring.
I will admit I havent finished the recent seasons or am up to date with the manga, but I still stand by what I said. I feel like y'all are too harsh on this man's looks (especially before the "glow up"). Again, I know he's fictional, I just wanted to write about it because I'm bored and don't have much better to do lol. He's been my favorite character since highschool and I'm 21 now:'). I think I will defend him until I die tbh lol.
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My fave trope idea for twst fics is that the world operates on disney logic and that yuu is just fully baffled by it
Like a villain is 1000% easily identifiable as a villain at first glance or clearly evil and everybodys like "he seems nice :)" and yuu is just ????????? (CoUGH the event on jp right now)
So for rollo to CAUSE problems for yuu to save yuu from, im expanding on that with the idea that yuu is absolutely 100% fucking aware of what rollo is doing. Like its obvious to them. But yuu is so used to having little care shown to them, that they let him and play along. Playing eachother sounds perfect for them.
Tbh I think about this a lot.
I keep imaging a Yuu with more prophetic dreams in TWST and shit and how funny it would be. Did you see how creeped Azul got when Rollo knew his exact glasses prescription?
Just imagine Yuu that has dreamed about NRC before and had visions about what people say. Imagine if you see Leona talk to his dumbass army like "they'll never see it coming." And then Yuu the next day is like "you know how it is, I never see anything coming" OR Leona gets defeated and Yuu is like "I did see it coming btw"
Just hinting that you seem to know more. "Okay three overblots in a row, next one is happening this break, not saying who it is tho" "pfft yeah right" and it happens.
"How did you know to rip Azuls contracts???"
"It was revealed to me in a dream"
Imagine hinting to Idia that you know he's related to STYX and he's sweating more bullets than the time you said you knew who is husbando is.
Or with this recent event you loudly say "oh what a cool guy, I sure hope he isn't evil and turns us into puppets or anything!!" And everyone's like "lol what" and then it happens and they're wondering how you knew. (You did not need visions for this event.)
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amyispxnk · 5 months
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I'd do whatever I could do
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Summary - you're staying with Joel now, trying to figure yourself out and leaving the QZ to visit some of his friends
A/N: oh my god, I finally did it y'all - finally made the part two for this 👏 Also, I was going through the lyrics of this song and I kind of realised just how daddy issues Joel it is. I'm not gonna list them, but there are definitely a good few lines that stuck out to me. A part 3 might be simmering. We'll see.
Pairing: platonic/father figure!Joel Miller x f!reader (could probably be read as GN tho?)
Word count: 1.8k
Warnings: violence, mentions of past abuse, PTSD, alcohol mention, language, angst, pet names, comfort, paternal issues, very brief mention of a gun
DO NOT COPY THIS FIC IN ANY WAY PLS AND TY.
Part 1 here
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You reckoned you had stopped really taking the words in a few seconds after he slammed the door behind him, immediately shrinking back into the couch where you'd previously been sat staring into space, whilst he told you things about his day.
Your eyes darted up at him quickly, lip quivering already. You still didn't know exactly why. Why small things like him touching you too abruptly, raising his voice (never at you, but for some reason it still affected you), loud noises like a door slamming, affected you. But they really did, and he'd come to notice it after only a few days of you staying with him.
--
He came back home after a long, difficult, tiring deal. Since your arrival and staying at his place had been so recent, his old habits remained. One of them was to practically shout and stomp his foot in anger as soon as he got back from a trade went south, a bad day out.
"Fuck!" He had gritted through clenched teeth as he threw his bag on the floor, deadset on getting into the kitchen to his whisky to muffle the frustration of the day.
You froze in complete fear and horror as he rounded the corner, his eyes immediately falling onto your trembling figure, clutching the little food packet in one of your hands as your own eyes stared back at him, bulging out of their sockets.
"Shit." He muttered to himself, taking a few steps towards you - not expecting you to immediately drop the packet and raise your hands in front of you, almost cowering before him.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry Joel p-please, I don't-" You stuttered, eyes welling up with tears as you flinched when he took another, more careful, step towards you, already apologising even though you didn't know what you had done.
"Hey, hey, hey. 's okay," he soothed. "C'mere sweetheart. It's okay." And somehow the sound of his voice, so gentle just for you, comforted you immediately.
You stepped into his open arms, body shaking hard with sobs as you choked on your own tears. "I'm sorry." You said, muffled into the fabric of his flannel.
"I told you it's okay. What happened, sweet girl?" He hugged you tight, right hand coming up to rub soothing circles into your back.
"I don't know." You murmured, unsure of what set you off so badly.
"It's okay baby, we'll figure it out. You're okay now."
--
That was the first time it had happened, now you were here again. He'd slammed the door, although he wasn't angry. It was just something he did out of habit to ensure it closed properly, but after he saw you shaking like before on the couch, his brows knitted in worry.
"What's wrong?" He asked, a hand coming to rest on your shoulder as you turned to face him slightly, jolting - not as aggressively as you used to - at the touch.
"Nothing. Just- you slammed the door. I think it's one of those.. trigger things you were talking about."
Naturally, Joel had racked his mind and scoured the dozen odd books he had in his apartment to try remember anything about this kind of mental health issue and the things you'd gone through, finally landing on some sort of PTSD. He'd explained it as best he could to you, telling you that the things like someone raising their voice at you and loud noises were 'triggers', things that reminded you of the times with your dad and made you feel that same fear you'd feel with him all over again.
"Right." He nodded, brushing your hair back and out of your eyes a bit. "'m sorry, sweetheart. I'll try not to do it again, yeah?"
You hummed a noise of agreement, making a space beside you for him to sit down on the couch.
He did so and cleared his throat. "Got some news," he began "'s nothin' big, really. Just thought you oughta have a bit of notice."
You turned to face him a little more as he looked up and met your eyes. "I have this deal, with a guy in Lincoln, and I'm due to go see him next week." He told you.
"So.. you're leaving?" You questioned, trying not to seem too hurt by it.
"No, no. I mean- if you don't want to come with me, then yeah, but I'll be back within the month. I just.. don't feel too safe leavin' you here." He explained, and you nodded.
"I don't want you to go. I'll- I'll come with you." You mumbled, and he gently tilted your head up to face him again.
"You're gonna be okay out there? Y'ever been out of the QZ before?" He asked. If you hadn't ever been outside then things could be quite difficult. It would be scary for a young thing like you. Not only that, but you had your triggers, and the gunfire paired with the infected would surely set one of them off - that's why he'd tried putting the entire trip off, but he had to go. That was how he made his living around here, he needed those supplies.
"Mmhm. I've also killed a few infected before, if you're worried about that. Not gonna be completely useless, I'd say." You said with a small chuckle, leaning into his touch subconsciously.
"Okay." He nodded, stroking your cheek gently before standing up and going over to the kitchen to make something for dinner. "And you're not useless, sweetheart, not at all."
-----
Bill and Frank. That's who they were. Bill was the guy he actually had the deal with, Frank was the one who'd convinced Bill to go along with it in the first place. Frank was the nice one, Joel had told you.
He'd explained a bit before you'd left and more when it came up in conversation as the two of you walked. In and out of forests, weaving between trees, trudging down dirt roads and kicking rocks, on your journey to Lincoln.
A journey that you still would've been able to complete within a day on foot, but that was before the apocalypse. Now there were buildings falling over eachother, and guards near your place of departure which slowed you down, and clickers and the likes which ensured you had to be completely silent in your movements, extending the time of your journey by at least 50%.
You watched as he slaughtered them all though. It should have scared you, at least a little, but it just amazed you. Admittedly, it had shaken you when you saw him completely beat one of the FEDRA guards to death when you were making your way out of Boston. You'd been caught, a guard that wasn't supposed to be there was there and Joel wasn't careful enough.
Things were almost okay, you probably could have haggled your way out of that situation, but when the soldier made a comment about you, a comment about what they might do to a 'bad girl' like you for sneaking out of the QZ, he had simply seen red. He didn't even know he had lunged for the man until he was on top of him, the crunch of the soldier's jaw and Joel's fist coming down on his face bringing him back to reality.
He was protective of you, and rightfully so, and you didn't even care how aggressive he could get with it. He wanted to keep you safe, and would go that far for it, therefore he cared about you. Someone actually cared about you.
"Okay, I think we're gonna stay here for the night." He said, pulling you out of your thoughts as you gave him a small smile.
"Okay."
You both set up a makeshift camp, eating whatever you could spare from your stash of food before getting ready to go to sleep - him denying your offer to take watch like he did before and he'd do everytime.
You sighed, walking off and quickly settling into the sleeping bag, melting into it and relishing the warmth it offered you as you hugged yourself to sleep, body heat almost suffocating you but in a comforting way.
--
When you woke up, you thought you actually were suffocating, throwing the cover off of you and crying out his name, the only person you could think of to save you. He was going to get you, he was back, he was coming for you and he'd never leave you alone, he'd take you from Joel and then he'd k-
"Hey, hey. That's not gonna happen, sweetheart, come on, come over here." You didn't realise you were saying those things out loud but it didn't matter as you crawled out of your sleeping bag, letting him pull you into his lap as he cradled you, rocking you back and forth as he kissed your head.
"It's okay, it's okay. Did ya have another nightmare?" He asked, voice calm and low as he tried to comfort you and calm you down.
You nodded quickly, sniffing and breathing erratically as you did.
"Sweet girl. It's okay now, it's okay." He reassured you, hugging you tight and pressing more kisses into your hair. "I won't let anything happen to you, you know that."
"I know." You said quietly, voice cracking as you wiped at your tears. "I'm sorry." You said, somehow in a voice even quieter than before.
He sighed, breathing slowly and deeply - something he knew helped, as he noticed you'd start breathing in time with him to ground yourself, regulate your own breathing during these situations. "Don't go and apologise when you haven't even done anything wrong, sweetheart. You're going through a lot and you're probably still processing everything that happened, it wasn't that long ago when you were still.." he didn't want to remind you of anything too sensitive, trailing off slightly. "Point is, it's all fairly fresh, and it's natural things like these nightmares are gonna be happenin', so don't apologise, okay?" He said, looking into your glossy eyes and brushing your tears away.
"Yeah. I'm-" You were already going to apologise again, making him frown slightly. "Thank you, Joel."
"It's okay. You try get some more sleep now, okay?" He gently helped you off his lap and pulled the sleeping bag back on top of your body, knees cracking as he got back up to walk away to where he was taking watch - when your voice called out for him again.
"Can you stay with me? Please, Joel? I'm just- I'm scared." You mumbled, face growing hot with embarrassment at how pathetic the question felt now you were speaking it aloud.
He pressed his lips together, turning his head to check the area once more before getting his own sleeping bag, placing it by yours, and resting his arm behind your head as you tucked your face into his chest.
"Goodnight." He said softly, stroking your hair slowly.
"Night, Joel." You mumbled into the soft fabric of his shirt, before passing out again, leaving him to lay alone with his thoughts in the cool night.
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Thank you sm for reading, I hope you enjoyed! Likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated and requests are open! 💞
Tags - @rosierogie @jjlevin
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cursingtoji · 2 months
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🎙️ just saw your post asking about blog recs…step up to the stage bc i need some!!!!
BLOGS RECOMMENDATION <3
— mostly jjk, but also chainsaw man and aot
*taping the mic* okay here are my nominees with some fics recomendations as well
disclaimers!
lemme start saying so plot is everything to me, pwp can be hot but i'll hardly remember it afterwards, that being said here's some writers that can do both great plots and hot scenes.
also while digging i realize i wasn’t following some of those and if you noticed im sorry im dumb but i truly love your writing.
i tried to tag every active blog i could remember but it’s possible i forgot a few since i’ve been reading more jjk recently. if i forgot you im so sorry please don’t take offense.
many blogs i loved were deactivated, rest in piece great works they had.
everything i read i reblog under the tag #recs
@thekillingmoonmoon ofc moon is the first one i think when the topic "best writers" come up, i freaking love her and everything she does its not even fair to pick one thing so im picking 3, this super passionate toji work that i re-read at an alarming frequency (which btw i consider my own personal gift). yakuza choso and yuki aka the hottest duo ever. the cherry on top is her kishibe series (just realized i gotta catch up on)
@rinhaler - luxe is def on my top 3, she comes up with very organic scenes. even if it's a simple plot she can develop it so originally. I recently read her underground fighter!sukuna and i'm still thinking about it.
@laudthingcat has the best headcanons in the jjk fandom hands down, it’s the perfect dose of hot funny and cute, pick anything from her masterlist it’s guaranteed you’ll have a good time reading it. when you moan their name in your sleep in particular gives me butterflies
@meownotgood is obviously the best aki writer out there, you can see the love for aki in their words and how they write him so well and so into character. arrival in tokyo is truly a masterpiece, they also have a +100k words series i've been wanting to read for a while but i want to rewatch chainsaw man first hehe, i'm 100% sure is fire tho.
@kentoangel roma writes choso like she's in love with him and you can tell. shes always on my for you and even her snippets are *chefs kiss* special kudos to stepbrother!choso
@kentopedia i just realized i'm assigning a writer per character and nanami is definitely rylie's. the domestic lovely way she writes him makes me forget canon.
@tojisun another blog that is very often on my for you page. cannot talk about toji fics without bringing up sun, everything she writes about him has me furiously nodding. not to mention simon and konig, just talking about them makes me wanna run to her blog and binge read everything
@chocochipsushi 's bodyguard toji is unforgetable to me, i wish i lost my memory so i could read it all again for the first time. bodyguard toji is the definition of living rent free in my mind, whenever i have to deal with annoying coworkers i immediately think “bodyguard toji would not allow them to talk to me like that”
@suget one of the greatest geto writers for sure, they have so many geto works, i was going through their blog to find the one i read more recently and there was so many others i haven’t seen! another writer i could very easily spend a whole day binge reading. btw this cult leader one was recommended to me and i fell in love with it <3
@staryukis has the cutest gojo drabbles
@tonycries brooklin baby was recommended to me by moon and it had me by the neck! also they have many other works im hoping to read soon as well
@mommypieck isayama created reiner but they created subby reiner
@titan-fodder ‘s the tinniest notion The Best Reiner fic in all the existence of the universe (tw: stepcest kinda?)
@nanaslutt mma!toji made feel every emotion possible so intensely
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elliereject · 9 months
Text
stupid bitch .1
* you and ellie have been friends for years but you only recently discovered that the way you liked her was more than just friendly. unfortunately, she’s already in a relationship with a toxic girl who (surprise!) does not like you. as their relationship starts to sour, you’re the one ellie always goes to for comfort and you oblige until you can no longer take the heartache and pain you’re feeling which causes you to finally confess…blurring the already thin line between yours and ellie’s ‘friendship’.
* infidelity, oblivious!ellie, meanish!ellie, pining, anxious thoughts
* first fic, based on girl in reds Stupid Bitch bc wow does that song make me scream. if this gets any traction at all ill post pt 2 and a couple others I have in the works :) feedback is appreciated, pls enjoy and interact!!
*mdni
*wc - 4k
part .2 here
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You had a love hate relationship with Ellie.
Well, it was mostly love…who were you kidding, it was all love.
She’s been your best friend for years and you were so fucking glad she was apart of your life. She’d been there for you during the worst parts like when your parents didn’t speak to you for a month after you came out and the best parts like when you got accepted into your dream school.
Every great memory in your life, Ellie was there. She was someone you could rely on and who you knew would stick by you even when she saw the worst parts of you and you hoped she knew you would do the same for her. You wanted to spend the rest of your life with her. Of course, it wasn’t until she started dating her that you realized your true feelings.
“I’m telling you! She’s just—she’s perfect!” Ellie gushed, your stuffed animal being squeezed to death between her lean arms.
You forced a smile onto your face, a sour feeling thrashed in your gut. “I’m happy for you, glad you guys are hitting it off.”
“We’re more than hitting it off, we’re like, on the exact same wavelength..did you know she does her own tattoos? How fucking cool is that?”
You turned back around in the chair at your desk, trying to busy yourself with the schoolwork you were supposed to be doing and rolling your eyes at her rambling. The two had been seeing eachother for the last month and she did nothing but talk about her.
“Yeah I did know because you’ve told me a thousand fucking times..” You mumbled.
“Hm?” She asked, “Sorry, Cat just sent me the funniest meme.”
She spun your chair back around to show you the meme on a cracked screen and when you saw it you wanted to take her phone and toss it out the window.
“I sent you that like 4 weeks ago.” You laughed dryly.
“Oh, for real?” She mumbled, already pulling her phone back to continue texting Cat.
You rolled your eyes again, huffing when you picked up your phone to text Jesse. He was the only one who knew about your newly discovered crush on Ellie, other than her, you considered him your closest friend and he had comforted you when you came to his dorm, eyes filled with tears and guilt after you told him that you were in fact in love with your best friend.
im going to go fucking insane.
oh brother, what did she do this time?
she won’t stop fucking talking about her ☹️ she litrly just showed me a meme cat sent her that i SENT HER WEEKS AGO and she didn’t even remember
you know ellie tho she prob just forgor fr
jesse i Litrly cant do this anymore. I’m going to rip out my air and throw my laptop at the wall.
Rip out your air? How would that work, like a breathing machine??
Die
💪💗 sorry y/n im sure it’ll get better
😐 when?
Before you could see his response you dropped your phone in your lap when you felt Ellie tap your shoulder, “What?”
“Said I’m gonna go piss.”
“Oh, okay.”
She got up from your bed and when she left, her phone was still there.
You shouldn’t. It’s a complete and utter violation of her privacy. If she caught you, she’d probably never talk to you again…
But you knew her password, and it was right there and you were so damn curious.
Your hands moved before you could rethink and suddenly her phone was in your hand and your eyes were skimming over her messages.
You clicked on the thread with Cat and felt your heart seize when you read what she was saved as: my girl ♥️
Despite the searing pain you felt pang through you like a hot knife, you read on.
i can’t wait to cu tonight ;))
same, u can finally get started on my tattoo!
mhm 😇 can’t you come over a little esrlier? im so bored T_T
cant :( yk im hanging out with ★ rn
yeahhhh but she’d understand you’d wanna hangout w ur gf right?? she said she was happy we started dating so she can’t get upset
what the fuck?
yeah ig but irs been a while since I last saw her
plssss els :(( just wanna hold u rn
There was a little space between this message and the next, you figured it been when you and Ellie got caught up in a conversation about your mutual hate for one of your profs.
if u rlly don’t wanna see me jus say that.
yk that’s not true id love to see u rn
then COME, if she gets upset that’s not ur problem..she has to understand you can’t spend all your time with her
What the fuck was this bitch even talking about? She was the one trying to lock Ellie up. You were about to scroll down to see what Ellie had said but you heard footsteps and threw her phone back on your bed before pretending to be stuck on a practice question.
Ellie picked up her phone and you were so scared she’d notice you were on it you thought your heart was going to pop out of your chest and fall onto your desk.
“Hey..”
Dread filtered through your body. She knows, she knows and she’s going to confront you and she’s going to storm out and you’re going to lose your best friend and—
“I think I’m gonna head out, seems like you got a lot of work to do.”
You dropped your pencil and turned to look up at her, “Are you sure? I mean we could go somewhere if you want.” You didn’t want her to leave, you wanted her to stay in your dorm with you forever.
“No.” She said quickly, backing up “It’s fine, I’ll see you later.”
“Okay I’ll see you—“
She walked out your door, letting it close.
“Later.”
—★
It was a freezing December night the first time Ellie came to you, eyes ridden with tears over a fight with Cat.
Usually, it was her calling you up to have you come over and comfort her because Cat was ‘acting weird’ and ‘being mean’. But something serious must have happened for her to be here.
A few weeks had passed since that enlightening time at your dorm where she had practically flown out of your room to go see Cat. During the following weeks, the two of you had barely talked let alone seen eachother and when you did it was almost always about Cat. You understood that you were both busy with school and she was busy with her girlfriend and you didn’t know whether it was Cat or Ellie that had forced the two of you’s separation or if it was your own subconscious mind trying to protect you from getting hurt. Either way, you missed her dearly.
She was pounding hard on your door, and when you opened it she immediately rubbed her red rimmed eyes. She lived in the other dorm building and judging from her appearance you imagined she ran here as quick as she could; Snowflakes adorned her hair and eyelashes and her nose was red from the cold, she had an old green hoodie on and plaid pyjama pants. Even on the verge of tears she was still so unbelievably gorgeous.
“Ellie, it’s like 3AM..” You said groggily, you knew she had trouble sleeping but she usually texted you if she needed a distraction.
“I know just, please I need to talk to someone. And Dina’s with Jesse and Cat fucking—” She paused, sniffling.
You sighed, stepping to the side so she could come in and you could close the door that was currently blowing in cold air from the freezing hallway.
“What happened?”
“It’s Cat.”
Of fucking course. Fury engulfed you, Ellie wasn’t one to cry often or even come close to it so Cat must’ve done something pretty fucked up.
“She was being so distant and I don’t even fucking know what I did and then some fucker I don’t even know just sent me this,”
She shoved her phone in your face and the image made even more anger surge throughout you. It was blurry but you could still make out two figures, one with short black hair—Cat, and another unrecognizable. Cat had her arms locked around the mysterious girls neck and the two were not just kissing but full on frenching. You wanted to throw insults so bad but Ellie was upset and that was more important than dissing her girlfriend.
“Oh Ellie, I’m so sorry.” you said softly, pulling her in for a hug.
She sniffled and wiped her nose, “Yeah, thanks.”
“So, are you two..” you trailed off, unsure how to finish the sentence.
“I don’t know, maybe. I sent her a text about the picture and told her to call me but she hasn’t answered.” Ellie said, pulling away.
“Ellie are you serious?” You questioned, looking into her green eyes. “She fucking cheated.”
Ellie looked to the side, avoiding your scrutinizing gaze.
“There could be more to the story.”
You scoffed, “Looks pretty straightforward to me, she went to party, made out with another girl and is completely ignoring you.”
Her jade eyes scanned your face before she shook her head, “You don’t like her.”
No shit you don’t like her.
“That’s not true.” You lied.
“Yes it fucking is! at first I thought I was overthinking it but whenever I bring her up you get this…this look on your face.” She accused.
“What look? This i—“
“That look!” She cut you off, pointing a long finger in your face. “Like..like you’re about cry or blow up or something.”
“I—“ Before you could defend yourself Ellie’s phone rang, the two of immediately knowing who it was. Ellie cleared her throat and answered before the second ring even started.
“Babe?” She croaked out and you winced, both at the nickname and the pain in her voice. You couldn’t listen to this.
“I think..you should go.” You said quietly, walking toward your door to open it for her.
Her eyes flashed to your face before she nodded and walked out, phone still close to her ear.
That night as you crawled back into your bed and warm tears hit your pillow you never wanted to rip out your heart more because the love you had for her was still there, never wavering and consuming you entirely even though you knew it would never be requited.
— ★
It’d been weeks since that night and since you’d talked to Ellie. You didn’t mean for the gap to stretch this long, you decided to give her some space after your…argument? And then you had finals, and then winter break where you went back home to visit old friends and reluctantly, your parents.
You came back two days before classes started up again so you could ease back into your routine. In the last few weeks you tried your hardest to push thoughts of Ellie out of your mind but you cared for her too much to completely disregard her and bits and pieces slipped through the guards you had put up.
You layed on your dorm bed, sighing as you stared at Ellie’s Instagram.
Back together, you thought.
Over the course of Cat and Ellie’s relationship, you’d learned how to tell when they were ‘on a break’ and when they were together just from her Instagram.
When they were together, her profile picture was the two of them, Cat pressing her lips against Ellie’s cheek and Ellie with her eyes scrunched closed, a joyful look on her face. Ellie also had a highlight labled with nothing but a cat emoji as well as a few random posts of them doing more random shit.
When they were ‘on a break’; Ellie’s profile picture was the default one and she had no highlights, and a singular picture posted; her and Joel after her highschool graduation. After Ellie saw the picture of Cat at that party it’d been like that for two and a half weeks and you silently hoped it’d stay that way forever.
Now, her profile picture was the two of them looking happier than ever and you couldn’t help but feel mocked while you moped miserably in your cold dorm alone, your only comfort being the stuffed animal that you held close to your chest.
You missed her, desperately.
You couldn’t do this anymore, you had to have her in your life even if it wasn’t the way you wanted. You sat up, brushing the stray tears from your face you didn’t know had fallen. Determination coursed through you, you were going to break the silence first.
Ellie was getting back tomorrow so you arranged a plan, you’d pick up a pepperoni pizza from her favourite diner—pizza was her favourite food and you’d called her basic when she first told you, which she replied “Anybody who says they don’t like pizza or pizza is basic are trying too hard to be different, pizza is the only perfect thing in the world.” and you shoved her arm playfully telling her to just eat the freaking pizza— the memory made your heart hurt but you swallowed the feeling.
Then, you’d pick up both yours and her favourite snacks from the 7/11 near your campus along with a few sodas.
And finally, the main item of your grand scheme, stopping by the blu-ray store to pick up the first Jurassic Park, the two of you could always watch it on Netflix but she preferred having the physical thing, stating it felt more ‘authentic.’
It was going to be the perfect night, and by the end of it, it would be like the entire last month and couple weeks never happened. The two of you would be back to normal.
— ★
You’d spent the entire next day anxious about seeing Ellie again. You’d woken up early on accident and had to find things around your dorm and campus to busy yourself until it was time to get ready and grab all the items on your list.
And now here you were at— you checked your phone, 6:43 PM— pyjama clad and balancing a pizza box and your phone in one hand and two bag fulls of snacks and Jurassic Park in the other.
You placed one bag down to knock on the door and you heard shuffling before it swung open. To your distaste, the person who opened the door was not your best friend/crush/reason for breathing, but instead her girlfriend who you knew didn’t like you. Could you blame her though? You were in love with her girlfriend. Although she didn’t know that, at least…you don’t think she did.
You can’t believe you hadn’t thought about what you’d do if she was here, the pair seemed to always always always be together when they weren’t ‘on a break.’ Your eyes trailed down her form, she had on tiny plaid pyjama shorts and a thick green hood on that you recognized as Ellie’s. Jealousy plunged through you like boiling, corroding acid.
“Babe, who is it?” You heard Ellie call down from somewhere in the dorm and your stomach flipped, it’d been so long since you’ve heard her voice.
“Your friend.” She deadpanned.
“Who?” Ellie questioned, walking into view of the door frame. Her short auburn hair was out of it’s usual style and laid damp against her neck along with a towel, she was wearing thick navy sweatpants and a thin white tank top. Your eyes immediately landed on the black ink that trailed across her right forearm. She looked fucking amazing.
“★?” Her jade eyes widened, “What are you doing here?”
You held up the pizza box and movie half heartedly, “Surprise?”
She smiled and you swear to fucking god you almost dropped everything you were holding to whip out your phone and snap a picture. You’d missed her smile so much and seeing it online just wasn’t enough.
“Come in, you and Cat can catch up while I finish drying off.”
You looked at Cat, honestly forgetting she was there. Her dark eyes bored into you and you couldn’t help but notice how pretty she was with her short black hair and milky skin. Why were the pretty ones always fucking crazy?
She stepped to the side so you could walk in and put everything down on the old coffee table.
Awkward silence enveloped the space between you two before you cleared your throat, she was Ellie’s girlfriend whether you liked it or not which meant you’d being seeing a lot more of her so you had to atleast be civil.
“I like your hoodie.” You tried, giving her a weak smile.
“Thanks. It’s Ellie’s.” Maybe you imagined it, but you swore you heard a bit of a mocking emphasis on Ellie.
You sighed, taking a seat on the worn green sofa Ellie had found on Facebook market place for what she thought was ‘the deal of the century.’
“Hope you like pepperoni pizza.” You tried again.
“I’m vegetarian.”
Of course she was.
“Oh..you could pick them off?”
She scoffed, trudging off in the direction of Ellie, leaving you to sit alone. This was not going as planned, you’d wanted to spend one on one time with Ellie and discuss what the fuck had happened in the last month but it’d just be awkward when the elephant was literally in the room.
The two returned, Ellie’s hair dryer now and towel discarded. Ellie plopped down beside you and you didn’t miss the way Cat’s eye twitched.
Ellie’s eyes landed on the box of pizza, her face lighting up. “No way, I thought they were closed during the holiday’s.”
You smiled, “Guess I was lucky.”
She smiled back and your gaze met hers, your heart picked up in speed when you saw something in her warm jade eyes…something soft and—
Before you could inspect it further Cat slid past your legs to sit on the left of Ellie, separating the two of you again and almost pushing you off the couch.
Cat leaned into Ellie and you thought you saw her stiffen in the corner of your eye but when you turned to look at her she was back to normal, maybe you imagined it.
“You brought a movie?” Ellie asked, eyeing the small black rectangle on the table.
“Oh, yeah! Jurassic Park.” You leaned forward, picking it up.
“On blu-ray?” Cat snarked, “Isn’t that a little outdated.”
You looked at Ellie but she was focused on the the pizza, already downing a slice and a half.
“I think it’s fun, feels more..authentic.” You replied, noticing the small smirk that crept on to Ellie’s face.
You got up, fiddling with the small TV and DVD player like you did many times before when you and Ellie had a movie night. Finally, the movie started playing and you grabbed a bag of snacks as you eased into the beanbag instead of sitting back down on the couch.
Guess yours and Ellie’s talk could wait.
The movie droned on and Cat inevitability fell asleep on Ellie, you pulled out your phone as the scene where Donald Genarro gets eaten by a T-Rex while on the toilet started up.
You were answering snaps, liquorice hanging from your mouth when you got a text from Ellie, you looked up and saw her staring at you.
Bored?
You smiled,
We’ve seen this movie like a million times. I’m tired of watching an attorney get chomped up on the toilet. 😔
she stifled a laugh,
are u serious? 😫 that’s like the best scene.
personally, I like the end where they make it off the island.
Ofc u do 😒 always a sucker for happy endings.
You sighed, rolling your eyes playfully.
Hey can I ask u smth
ofc what’s up?
whyd you come here tonight? don’t get me wrong I’m glad u did its just. It’s been a while since I’ve heard from u and then u just like shoe up lol
shoe up? 🤨🤨
She frowned jokingly.
I’m srs.
Your fingers hovered over the letters as you thought of how to answer, you couldn’t just tell her that you’d been thinking of her aimlessly in the last month and you’d decided to push away the immense romantic feelings you had in order to at least stay friends with her now could you?
i just missed you and I thought like, why did we even stop talking in the first place, yk?
As you typed the next message you felt heat creep up your neck and your heart pick up just a tad. It wasn’t risky per say..just a little intimate.
tbh, ive been missing you the entire past couple weeks. like so fucking much 🫥
You added the emoji to soften the blow, make it seem less like you were in love with her and her absence caused a gaping hole in your life.
tbh, me too. im sorry abt that night btw. i was angry and felt betrayed and I lashed out on u even tho u were just looking out for me, and im sorry for not reaching out.
I understand and I’m sorry too. for yelling and not reaching out sooner 💗😞
I don’t forgive you.
Panic flooded your brain, was she still upset? Did she not want to be friends with you anymore? Did you wait too long to reach out? Ellie looked at your frightened face and tapped quickly, reassuring you.
Joking joking! I was gonna say i might if u come over like this more often but.. yeah 🥸
You sighed, relief washed over your body and you giggled.
u always have the worst timing.
You glanced up at her expecting to see a smile but your heart tugged at her expression, she looked..sad. The usual gleam in her jade eyes was gone and her soft lips were pulled into a solemn frown.
i know
Before you could pick apart the message a shiver jolted through your spine and goosebumps covered your neck and arms. When did it get so cold?
hey is ir kind of cold in here?
yeah the heaters busted. turns on and off 😒 i asked matinance to come take a look but yk how those mfs are.
damn..r ur blankets still in the same place?
nah i moved them a while ago they’re by the actually lemme just show u
Ellie peeled Cat off her shoulder carefully as to not wake her up and motioned for you to follow her. You got up from your seat on the beanbag and treaded quietly behind her.
She led you into her room and as she dug in the back of her closet you took in the space. It’d been too long since you’ve last been in there, you breathed in the familiar earthy-pine scent that was so inadvertently Ellie and eyed the bed you and her have had countless conversations on. Your eyes travelled to the guitar that stood against her bed frame, the wood worn from years of both her and Joel playing, she’d only played for you a couple of times and even then it was little snippets as she felt too embarrassed to play you a full song.
“Here.” Your eyes snapped back to her and the plush green blanket she held out. You were confused for a second but then you’d remembered why you came in here in the first place.
“Oh right, thanks.” You reached for the blanket but you must’ve anticipated for it to be lighter because it fell from your hand and landed with a soft thump on the floor.
She sighed playfully, reaching down to grab it, “Always a klutz, huh, bug?”
Your breath hitched at the nickname. She’d started calling you her lovebug back in elementary school to tease you since you always demanded she leave bugs and other insects alone and always opted for the piece of paper and cup method to set them free instead of her brutal method of stomp until they’re dead. The only insects she really liked were fireflies, she didn’t really have a reason..she just did.
However, she stopped calling you it when she had started dating Cat and resorted back to her regular “dude” “bro” and “man”. You forced your heart not to read too much in to her use of it, it probably just slipped out, nothing more nothing less.
She picked up the blanket and put it in your hands, placing one on top of yours to make sure you were holding it properly. And that would’ve been fine and dandy if she let go and you would’ve shuffled back to your seat on the beanbag and it would’ve been normal, and it would’ve been okay.
Only, she didn’t move her hand. She let it rest in top of yours, the heat from her body travelling to yours, igniting you in a way you don’t think was possible. You looked up to meet those familiar pools of jade, finding the same look you had seen when the two of you were on the couch; soft and wanting.
It’s funny really, you had shown up here with so much ready to say and now look at you. Completely silent, terrified that if you even breathed too loud it would shatter whatever blissful moment was going on.
But your heart battered against your chest, screaming and thrashing at you.
it’s NOW or NEVER. SAY IT, SAY IT, SAY IT!
“I like you.”
Silence. There was no echo in the room but you swore your words bounced around the walls and hung in the air.
“What?” She breathed, taking a step back.
This was wrong, you knew it was. Her girlfriend was literally less than 10 feet away and the two of you had just started talking again, but you couldn’t do it anymore. You needed to tell her, if there was even a sliver of a chance she felt the same way you were going to take it.
“I like you— more than a best friend like, and I have for a while. And I know you’re dating Cat and I get that you like her, I really do. But I can’t do this anymore, Ellie. I can’t sit and pretend I’m happy for you because I’m fucking not. Whenever I see you two together, kissing and hugging I wish it was me—fuck I wish it was me.”
“Bug,” She paused, closing her eyes briefly, “ ★..I’m dating Cat.”
“You think I don’t!—“ You paused, urging yourself to breathe and counting to ten slowly.
nine..ten.
“You think I don’t know that?” You repeated, calmer.
“★..” Ellie began but you pushed on.
“Ellie can’t you see how..how bad she is for you?”
“What?” She asked, anger lacing her voice.
“She’s hurt you time and time again, and I’m always the one who has to comfort you just for you to go back to her after a few sweet words…she doesn’t deserve you.”
“You’re not apart of my relationship you don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.” She spat.
You huffed, blowing out air as you tried to breathe again.
eight..nine..
“Just because you’re fucking in love with me doesn’t mean you get to come in here and act like you know a single fucking thing because you don’t.”
Fuck breathing, fuck ten.
“You stupid bitch! She doesn’t fucking care about you. Why can’t you see the one for you is me.” You yelled, then gasped at your outburst. It had taken both of you by surprise, even when you and Ellie got into the nastiest of arguments you never yelled at eachother—minus that one night a month ago. It felt good, letting out all the emotion you had harboured for so, so long.
The two of you were centimetres away, having inched closer to yell in eachothers faces but now it was quiet, except for the laboured breathing that expelled from both of you, fanning over eachothers lips.
Icy jade met the fire burning behind your eyes, the juxtaposition was so intense you thought if your heart beat any faster you’d go into cardiac arrest.
“..You’re the one for me..?” She said, a ghost of a whisper.
And It was quick, so quick you almost didn’t catch it but you did. Her eyes flitted a fraction of an inch down to your lips and fuck, it was over for both of you.
Your lips crashed into hers, her large hands found promise at the nape of your neck, pushing you closer as she slotted her mouth against yours. The blanket in your hands long forgotten as it fell back to the floor. It was heated, hungry, passionate, and desperate. Months of hate, love, frustration, and separation rolled into one long awaited meaningful kiss.
It was when her hand trailed down to your hip, pulling you flush against her body and snaking under your top to brush over your skin that ellicited a sweet noise from you and her tongue sliding across yours, that she finally pulled away, a string of saliva connecting the two of you.
“Fuck.” She breathed, her voice raspy and you bit your lip when you felt your clit pulse.
“I need to—“
“I think you—“ the two of you spoke at the same time making both of you pause.
“I need to go.” You whispered, so quiet she almost didn’t hear you.
She nodded and watched as you turned around and walked out of her room, she stayed like that, standing and barely breathing until she heard the familiar noise of her dorm door closing before she allowed herself to crumble to the floor and hang her head in her hands.
“Els?” Her head shot up, thinking you had returned but she felt guilt flood her body when her face fell in disspointment at the sight of her groggy girlfriend.
“Hey..we need to talk.” She sighed.
She really did have the worst timing.
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